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November 25, 2015
Stay Connected Anywhere
The lower house of Uruguay's Congress on Thursday passed a bill to allow same-sex couples to adopt children, paving the way for the country to become the first in Latin America to provide such rights.
The bill, approved by a 40-13 vote, must be approved by the Senate. Because the ruling Frente Amplio party holds a majority, the bill's passage is almost assured in the Senate, which must vote before September 15.
The adoption measure would be the most recent in a series of progressive laws passed with the backing of President Tabare Vazquez.
Last year, lawmakers approved a measure allowing children aged 12 or older to change their names, a measure aimed at transgender or transsexual youths. Uruguay also authorized same-sex civil unions last year, setting the stage for the current adoption law.
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Shape Memory Polymer Demo
Shape-memory metals get a fair amount of attention, but shape memory polymers exist, too. In fact, heat-shrink tubing is a familiar example of a simple shape-memory effect in a polymer. This video uploaded by MIT researcher Vikas Srivastava back in 2009 is a more impressive demonstration of heat-induced shape recovery.... Read more »

subset: commoncrawl


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April 26, 1930 - July 2, 2010
Fern Irene Irving of Athena died July 2, 2010, of injuries sustained in an automobile accident.
Funeral services will be held on Tuesday, July 13, 2010, at 4 p.m. at the Athena First Baptist Church in Athena. Interment will follow at the Athena Cemetery. Viewing will be held on Tuesday, July 13, 2010, from 1-5 p.m. and 7-9 p.m. at the Munselle-Rhodes Funeral Home, 902 S. Main, Milton-Freewater. Those who wish may make memorial contributions in memory of Fern Irene Irving to the First Baptist Church in Athena, the Memorial Rose Garden at the City Park in Athena or charity of choice in care of the funeral home.
She was born in Geary, Okla., on April 26, 1930, to Jessie Raymond and Thelma Elma (Burns) Baker. When she was 12, her family moved to Athena, where she attended school and lived the rest of her life.
Fern married Robert E Irving on July 25, 1947, at the Athena Christian Church. In addition to raising five children, she worked alongside her husband "Bob" at their business, The Athena Press, for nearly 40 years. Many summers she also drove wheat trucks for Wendell Clore. She was quite athletic and good at anything she tried. Fern bowled in league for years and participated in area horseshoe pitching tournaments whenever she had the chance. She enjoyed camping with her family, watching her children play sports, bowling and spending time with her extensive family in the Athena area. Fern took care of people her whole life. As the second oldest of nine children, she first helped care for her younger siblings. Then, after her marriage to Bob, she raised five children. She was a wonderful mother. Shortly before her last child moved out, she became the primary caretaker of her mother-in-law, Eleanor Cooke. Soon after Eleanor's passing, she began providing comfort and care to her husband Bob, for the last seven years of his life. She loved taking care of people. Most recently Fern volunteered as a driver for patients needing transportation to medical treatments. She enjoyed going to garage sales, playing cards and traveling with her friends. She loved her family and friends.
Survivors include three sons, Curtis Robert Irving of Eugene, Alan Clifford Irving of Portland and Mark Steven Irving of McMinnville; a daughter, Marilyn Irene Arellano of Portland; four sisters, Florence Hodgson of Athena, Freda Koch of Pendleton, Faye Case of Athena and Fleeta Schnebly of Burian, Wash.; two brothers, Forrest Baker of Quartsite, Ariz., and Farrin Baker of Bogue Chitto, Miss.; 10 grandchildren, two step-grandchildren and one great-grandchild. She is preceded in death by her husband, Bob; her son, Garold Raymond Irving; her sister, Francis Exon of Upland, Calif.; and her brother, Fred Baker of Hermiston.
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Prahalis, Hill lead Buckeyes to 78-51 win
Nov. 13, 2011
Game Highlights | Box Score | Photo Gallery
COLUMBUS, Ohio - Samantha Prahalis and Tayler Hill paced the Buckeyes with 17 points apiece to lead the Buckeyes to a 78-51 season-opening win over the Tennessee State Lady Tigers Sunday at Value City Arena.
Prahalis, the preseason Big Ten co-player of the year, added six assists and went 9 of 9 from the free throw line while Hill added four steals and hit two deep three-pointers.
Ohio State, the youngest team in the Big Ten this season, got big contributions from a couple freshmen, with 10 points apiece coming from Kalpana Beach and Raven Ferguson off the bench. Sophomore Ashley Adams added 10 points and six blocked shots.
Tennessee State scored the first basket of the game before the Buckeyes reeled off a 22-2 run to take command as six different Buckeyes scored in the first 8 minutes. Ohio State turned up the pressure defensively early and often, forcing six Lady Tiger turnovers during the run. The Buckeyes forced 13 first-half turnovers and 23 for the game.
Ferguson came off the bench to score 10 quick points and grab four rebounds in the opening stanza. Prahalis scored 10 in the first half while dishing out four assists as Ohio State built a 48-21 lead at the half.
Ohio State dominated on the glass, outrebounding TSU 46-33, including 12 offensive rebounds that led to 16 second-chance points.
The Buckeyes, who won their 17th straight season opener, are back in action this Friday, Nov. 18 when they play host to Temple at VCA. Game time is 6 p.m. ET.
Postgame Notes
Postgame Quotes


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December 2, 2015
It seems like I have said, "this is the hottest day so far, in 2011" so many times. And every time the temperature has been amazing.
There are some years, that Topeka never hits 100 degrees.
But this year has been different. A persistent "ridge" in the Jet Stream has kept us in sunshine and very hot weather since June 29th.
In late May, I started a forecast contest for "The Greatest Forecaster In The World". The question was, "what day will Topeka see our first temperature at or above 100 degrees?" The answer turned out to be June 30. But, it would be hard to imagine then how nasty this heat wave would be.
Including June 30, we have hit 100 degrees or more 21 times.
The peak of the heat wave has been August 1 and August 2.
August 1, 2011 was the first time we hit 109 since September of 2000. That's a long time.
But, August 2, 2011 was even hotter with 112 degrees. The first time we have seen that number since Topeka reached 113 on August 13th and 14th of 1936.
Remember this year. It could be decades before we see a day as hot as August 1, 2011. I hope!
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1.Remove perspiration stains - Add four tablespoons of salt to one quart of hot water and sponge the fabric with the solution until stains fade.2.Brighten colors - Wash colored curtains or washable fiber rugs in a saltwater solution to brighten the colors. Brighten faded rugs & carpets by rubbing them briskly with a cloth that has been dipped in a strong saltwater solution & wrung out.(Con't)
1.Quell oversudsing - Since, of course, we are all very careful in how much detergent we use in our laundry, we never have too many suds. But if someone overfills ... you can eliminate excess suds with a sprinkle of salt.2.Dry clothes in the winter - Use salt in the final laundry rinse to prevent clothes from freezing if you use an outdoor clothes line in the winter.(Con't) 432
I recently started using soapnuts for my laundry, dishwasher & general cleaning. Great for people, the environment & eliminating several products for one.224
When using can vegetables spend 20 min rinsing vegetables over cold water, this will rinse a majority of the salt.


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Interpreting the Genome
New technologies will soon make it possible to sequence thousands of human genomes. Now comes the hard part: understanding all the data.
The 12 prototypes look like prefabricated children's forts–boxes the size of freezers, faced with bright red plastic and grouped in twos and threes on a concrete floor at Pacific Biosciences, a startup in Menlo Park, CA. But the simple exterior of the machines belies the complexity within. Each box houses a small chip packed with thousands of strands of DNA from bacteria or viruses, each strand in a nano-sized well. An enzyme stuck to the bottom of each well speedily builds a corresponding strand, stringing together the bases, or chemical subunits of DNA, that pair properly with those of the original. Each of the four types of bases, represented by the letters A, T, C, and G, is labeled with a different fluorescent marker, which is activated by the reaction that attaches a new base to the strand. Because the machine tracks the reactions as they happen, it can churn out reams of raw data on the sequences of the DNA samples as fast as a built-in camera can record them.
A computer monitor installed next to each machine displays a snapshot of the action taking place. A series of lights scatter across the screen, bursting and fading in quick succession. Each flash lasts just tens of milliseconds, but its color indicates which of the four bases has just been added to a strand of DNA, and its position indicates where. The video must be slowed for viewing: the flashes come too fast for the human eye to process. Computer algorithms convert the pattern of flashes into DNA sequences hundreds to thousands of bases long. Additional algorithms then compare millions of these stretches of DNA, identify sequences that overlap at their ends, and fit the pieces together to capture a complete genome.
When it comes to sequencing DNA, time is money, and Pacific Biosciences' commercial machines, due out in 2010, could prove to be the fastest ever made. It took the Human Genome Project roughly $300 million and 13 years to work out the sequence of the three billion DNA base pairs in a composite human genome, a task completed in 2003. By October 2008, researchers using a variety of new types of machines were saying that they could sequence an individual genome for less than $100,000; one company promises a $5,000 genome by next spring. And Pacific Biosciences predicts that by 2013, its machines will be able to sequence a person's genome in 15 minutes, for less than $1,000.
Up to now, scientists have sequenced the genomes of a handful of people, and that's given them a general sense of human variability. But fast, cheap sequencing technology could make it practical to read the genomes of thousands, perhaps millions, of people. By combing through those myriad genomes and linking specific DNA sequences to different characteristics–handedness, height, blood pressure, and susceptibility to anxiety, to name a few–scientists should be able to unravel the complex interplay of genetic variants that makes each individual unique. Most important, that kind of sequencing capacity might finally reveal the inherited basis of common diseases–a riddle that has been taunting geneticists for decades.
The actual impact on medicine, however, is far less certain and may be much less positive. For almost two decades, researchers have promised that advances in sequencing technology will enable doctors to practice personalized medicine, targeting treatments to patients on the basis of their genetic profiles. The assumption was that a limited number of common genetic variants would turn out to underlie a particular disease, and physicians would be able to prescribe drugs according to which variants their patients carried. But the latest data suggest that even the most common heritable illnesses, such as diabetes and heart disease, are linked to many different variants, each of them relatively rare. If that's true, then practicing personalized medicine could become very complicated–and very expensive. "It would not be good to have a $5,000 genome and a $500,000 analysis," says Francis Collins, the former director of the National Human Genome Research Institute and a leader of the Human Genome Project.


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Downloaded and installed this one. First I supposed the driver to be the 12-12beta driver (now i am not shure about this):
Latest Beta Driver 109.4 MB 12.11 Beta 12/3/2012
... and inside:
fglrxinfo shows:
Within Catalyst Control Center / Info / under "Branch Software":Code:fglrxinfo display: :0 screen: 0 OpenGL vendor string: Advanced Micro Devices, Inc. OpenGL renderer string: AMD Radeon HD 7700 Series OpenGL version string: 4.2.11995 Compatibility Profile Context
Well, it works on two screens (expanded desktop) and much better than without the ati driver. Also I notice -besides the "AMD Testing use only" watermark- that VLC has some not to nice, but still ignoreable issues with the icons at the bottom. Video therefore runs smooth and after switching VLC into fullscreen the pic is fine. Much better than before (ATI driver).Code:Driver package: 9.01.8-121202a-150296E-ATI 2d-driver: 9.1.11 Catalyst: 2.18
I have to admit that I before experimented with the ATI solutions discussed at ubuntuextreme. That didn't work for my ubuntu, but I didn't get rid of all the modifications it did to my system, like geting different kind of kernel updates (generic, I think). Works for me, but the config is no more out-of-the-box.
Looking forward to remove the watermark, Gnome (right now I run on unity) and work with Windows in the VirtualBox.


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This hungry bird gives another meaning to the term spear fishing - as she turns her unlucky prey into a fish kebab. The anhinga bird spotted the fish swimming in a river before setting her sights on it for tea. She dived in head first and expertly skewered the fish with her beak...
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Seaside Heights on Sept. 19, a week after the fire that destroyed blocks of the boardwalk there and in Seaside Park. The blaze started in wiring in Seaside Park, but it's unclear who owns the equipment.
- Filed Under
It has been 2½ weeks since a sudden fire tore through five blocks of the boardwalk, and no one will say who owns the failed electrical wire that caused the blaze.
And borough officials have not yet produced inspection reports to show whether the orphan wires were inspected after superstorm Sandy, a week after the Asbury Park Press, the Daily Record's sister paper, requested those documents through the Open Public Records Act.
Gov. Chris Christie said in a radio broadcast Wednesday that the borough was responsible for inspecting wiring after superstorm Sandy. He also said on New Jersey 101.5 ...


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FILE - In this Oct. 3, 2008 file photo, assembly line worker Melvin Matthews, right, installs front seats in a Chevrolet Traverse at the General Motors Spring Hill Manufacturing Plant in Spring Hill, Tenn. General Motors announced Tuesday, Aug. 6, 2013, that it is spending another $167 million at the factory so it can build two new midsize vehicles. (AP Photo/Bill Waugh, File) / AP
Cars are assembled Thursday at General Motors' Spring Hill plant in Spring Hill, Tenn. The plant now employs about 2,000 people. / AP/GM
In this Aug. 1, 2013 photo provided by General Motors, cars are assembled at the General Motors Spring Hill Manufacturing Plant in Spring Hill, Tenn. General Motors announced Tuesday, Aug. 6, 2013, that it is spending another $167 million at the factory so it can build two new midsize vehicles. (AP Photo/General Motors) / AP
General Motors is spending another $167 million at its Spring Hill, Tenn., factory so it can build two new midsize vehicles.
The investment is on top of a previously announced $183-million investment. The spending is expected to create or keep 1,800 jobs, but GM wouldnt say how many new people would be hired.
The company also wouldnt identify the new vehicles. They could be new versions of the Chevrolet Equinox and GMC Terrain crossover SUVs.
The plant now makes the Equinox along with a factory in Canada. Although they are selling well, they were last reworked in 2009. They compete against newer vehicles like the Honda CR-V, Ford Escape and Toyota RAV-4.
Spring Hill is a former Saturn plant that now employs about 2,000 people who also make four-cylinder engines.
The assembly plant was idled amid the economic downturn in 2009. But production was restarted following a 2011 contract agreement with the UAW that included salary concessions for entry-level workers.
GM announced in 2011 that it would add 700 jobs to build the Equinox, and that it would add 1,200 jobs to build two more midsize vehicles for the 2015 model year.
The Spring Hill plant produced more than 3.7 million Saturns between 1990 and 2007. Most of the facilitys workers were then furloughed while the plant underwent a $600-million overhaul to build the Traverse crossover.
The changes included retooling to build vehicles made of sheet metal panels, as most Saturns built at the plant were plastic-body cars.
At its peak, the facility employed nearly 8,000 workers. By 2009, that number was down to about 630.
GM announced in January that Spring Hill would also begin making front and rear bumper assemblies for the Corvette sports car, which is assembled 90 miles to the north in Bowling Green, Ky.


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Mega Speculation from the Ottawa Sun
Bruce Garrioch of the Ottawa Sun provides a ton of trade speculation in his latest article. His rumor roundup includes the following huge names, Lecavalier, St. Louis, Steven Stamkos, Daniel Briere, Erik Cole and more.
Garrioch reports that many of the Tampa Bay players are being shopped for financial reasons and that many of their players may be available for the right price. It is noted in the article that league sources believe that Lecavalier is being shopped around the league due to eh fact that his no trade clause kicks in this upcoming summer. It is also noted that it is the ownership that is having a disagreement over what to do with Lecavalier.
It is also rumored that in Philly the Flyers may be looking to make a move. The names that are mentioned include Daniel Briere, Randy Jones and Joffrey Lupul. The later of the two may be moved in order to clear cap space so that Briere can return to the Flyers lineup. HTR believes that although Briere has many years left oh his contract he would be a great addition to a number of teams, especially a team such as Edmonton that has fast ice and like s to play an offensive type of game.
Garrioch reports that he Oilers may be looking to deal Erik Cole if they can not resign him to a new contract. They would rather trade him rather than loose him for nothing this offseason.
Other names that are mentioned in this article that may be available include Ed Jovanovski, Derek Morris and C Olli Jokinen as the Coyotes may be looking to dump salary.
Read the full article from


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The Ultimate PrizeWatch Full Episode
Premiere Date:May 01, 2012 - 10:00-11:01PM ET
From the Kentucky Flintlock Pistol to Crossbows and Grenade launchers–an epic assortment of weapons are featured. Four marksmen gear up to blast their way through the home stretch with hopes of becoming History's next Top Shot. After a series of elimination challenges, only two competitors enter the final showdown which comes down to the very last second.
Upcoming Airings:
- no upcoming airings in the next two weeks


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For more than a century, law enforcement squads in most states in the union have counted prostitution among the vices they are tasked with eradicating. Usually the women –- and, some times men — selling themselves for sex are the ones arrested for solicitation.
Their customers or "johns" often go free as do the pimps who profit from prostitutes they ensnare, often by making them drug addicts.
Rarely are the prostitutes seen as victims, only perpetrators of crime.
Recently, the U.S. Justice Department made a major move in changing the country's perception of prostitution by lending a different name to it: human-trafficking.
It is a dehumanizing practice one would associate with developing nations, not something that would exist in the United States, the richest country in the world.
But according to the United Nations, $9.5 billion is made from human-trafficking annually in the United States. The profiteers are pimps who usually pick up teen-aged runaways, make the teens financially dependent on them, addict them to drugs and force them to work the streets, often through violence.
"They tell the girls that they are beautiful or that they can be a model and then they are often subjected to violence and introduced to drugs like crack cocaine. But any of the areas they can be approached is anywhere they are not being supervised," said Assistant U.S. District Attorney Michelle Morgan.
Her press conference was held a few days before Super Bowl weekend because major sporting events are notorious for attracting human-sex-traffickers. Pimps profiting from prostitution are difficult to prosecute because the people they have enslaved for sex are often afraid to testify against them. These victims also often lack proper credentials to be eligible for rehabilitation centers that would help free them from the addiction that has put them at the mercy of pimps, said Sister Dominica LoBianco.
She helps run the Delaware County, Pa., Anti-Human Trafficking Coalition.
In the two weeks before the Super Bowl, which was staged just outside of New York City at MetLife Stadium in New Jersey, FBI agents did not say they "arrested" prostitutes. They said they "rescued" them. Not only did they rescue 16 girls ranging in age from 13 to 17, they rescued 50 adult women forced to work as prostitutes, some who were from foreign countries.
There were arrests made, however. The suspects were 45 alleged pimps, some of whom had firearms that were seized. Hopefully it is just the beginning of the end for these shameless predators who destroy lives.
For help or to report a tip of suspected trafficking, call the National Human Trafficking Resource Center at 1-888-373-7888 or text "HELP" or "INFO" to 2337332 (BeFree). Run by the Polaris Project, it is not a government agency nor an immigration authority.


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Album Rating: 5.04/4 agreedd
Album Rating: 4.0I keep on forgetting to dl this.
Album Rating: 4.5Then dl it now so you don't forget!
Digging: Gorgoroth - Under the Sign of Hell
Album Rating: 5.0sweet damn this broke 4.4 too. will jam today in honor
Album Rating: 4.5...Pierced did it first, just sayin'
Album Rating: 5.0eh even if this was 3.8 it would still be better than pierced :D
Album Rating: 4.0Slams
Album Rating: 4.5It's not but, you're just not getting it, Ford..
Album Rating: 4.0Pierced rips, so does this
Album Rating: 5.0pierced is too polished. this is pretty nice and dirty and the riffs are better imo. and yeah the drums are more slickly produced on pierced but mike smith owns everything on this
Album Rating: 4.5I came to the conclusion that Pierced was better long before either album hit 4.4 so ner.. :D
Album Rating: 4.0Damn this is meaty
Album Rating: 4.5I had a banana smoothie the other day and it was pretty thick, I thought to myself "is this as thick as Effigy's riffage?"
Nuh, not quite.
Album Rating: 5.0Suffocation changed Death Metal forever with this album. Brutal vocals, technical riffs, chaotic solos, well placed breakdowns, and of course the intense drumming of Mr. Mike Smith.
Production is done by Scott burns and is excellent. However I am torn between this album and Pierced from Within. This album is more raw, while Pierced is more polished and the bass is at the perfect level.
Mike Smith's drumming on this album is a stand out that separates it from many other Death Metal albums of the early 1990s. His ability to play tight and loose with fantastic double basswork and great fills throughout the album makes it standout.
Doug Cerrito is to thank for the great riffs on this album. From the brutal title track Effigy of the Forgotten to the more thrashy Jesus Wept.
There is no filler on this album. It's strong from the opening track to the outro Jesus Wept.
Album Rating: 4.5Pierced is better
Album Rating: 4.5IMO riffs on Pierced are much better, they are actually the main reason I prefer it over Effigy. more technical, more varied, and more groovy, while still thrashy and brutal like on this album
EDIT: looks like skele has been banned again lol, I was talking to him about the riffs
Album Rating: 5.0hey back up to 4.4 swett
Album Rating: 4.5Might 4.5 lel
Album Rating: 4.05's galore motherfuckers.
Bands: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z


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Simple and creamy vegan butternut squash soup to warm your belly.
This vegan recipe for butternut squash soup is great for a cold winter's day. We've had a lot of those lately. I haven't worn anything outside but snow boots in 2007.
We just had our 7th snow storm in seven weeks. I don't mind, I was raised in California where we pretended that a heavy frost was "snow." Here's some good grub for staying warm.
Butternut Squash Soup
Serves: 8
- 2 tablespoons olive oil
- 1 medium onion, diced
- 2 medium butternut squash, peeled, seeded and diced in 2 inch cubes
- 8 cups water or stock, boiling
- In a large soup pot, warm the oil (or butter)
- Caramelize onion in the pot, sauteing 10-15 minutes until golden brown
- Add the squash cubes and cook for 10 more minutes until the outside of the cube is a bit soft
- Pour the boiling water (or stock) over the onion/squash mixture
- Bring entire mixture up to a boil and simmer for 10 minutes
- In a vitamix, puree soup in very small batches (as not to scorch yourself and have soup splattered on your ceiling) at low, then working up to high speed until mixture is smooth and creamy
- Serve piping hot (unless for babes)


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£65.00 | $95.00
15 August 2007
384 pages
234mm x 153mm
Middle East
Anthropology, History, Middle East, Politics
The Bible and Zionism
Invented Traditions, Archaeology and Post-Colonialism in Palestine-Israel
Nur Masalha
Does the bible justify Zionism? Since the foundation of the Israeli state in 1948, Torah and tank have become increasingly inseparable, resulting in the forced expulsion and subjugation of millions of indigenous Palestinians.
Nur Masalha's groundbreaking new book traces Zionism's evolution from a secular, settler movement in the late 19th century, to the messianic faith it has become today. He shows how the biblical language of 'chosen people' and 'promised land' has been used by many Christian and Jewish Zionists as the 'title deeds' for Israel, justifying ethnic division and violence. With Edward Said, Masalha argues that a new politics of peace can only be achieved through a single, democratic state, which replaces religious zealotry with secular equality.
'Groundbreaking'. - Abrar
'His argument should be read and taken deadly seriously...Nur makes a fascinating comparison between US backing for Israel today and British Christian backing for the Zionist project over a hundred years ago.' - John Rose, International Socialism
'As a collection of virtually independent, yet interdependent essays, this books must strike the reader as unique in its breadth of discourse in the now increasingly over-subscribed as well as predominately 'area study' focussed discipline of Middle Eastern politics and history ... very important and contextually relevant.' - Sam Jacob, University of Exeter, Friends of Al-Aqsa
'Challenging.' - The Pastoral Review
Table of Contents
1. The Bible and the Founding Myths of Israel: History, New Historiography and the Truth (1882-1948)
2. From the Secular to the Sacred: Messianic Zionism and the Occupied Territories (1967-2006)
3. Reinventing Maimonides: From Universalist Arabo-Jewish Philosopher to Religious Fundamentalist (1967-2006)
4. Jewish Fundamentalism and the 'Sacred Geography' of Jerusalem in Comparative Perspective: Implications for Inter-faith Relations
5. The Politics of Armageddon: Christian Fundamentalism, the State of Israel and Jerusalem
6. Political Islam in Palestine and Israel
7. Reading the Bible with the Eyes of the Canaanites: Michael Prior, Liberation Theology and Moral Obligations
8. The Secular Democractic State: Edward W. Said and a New Political Vision for Palestine and Israel
About the Author:
Nur Masalha is Reader in Religion and Politics, and Director of the Centre for Religion and History and the Holy Land Research Project, St Mary's University College, UK. He is Editor of 'Holy Land Studies: A Multidisciplinary Journal'. His books include: 'Imperial Israel and the Palestinians' (2000); and 'The Politics of Denial' (2003).


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Sigils and Unions: Catacombs of Oralius--The Desolate Vigil
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February 2 2010, 06:08 AM
Nerys Ghemor
Vice Admiral
Location: Cardăsa Terăm--Nerys Ghemor
Re: Sigils and Unions: Catacombs of Oralius--The Desolate Vigil
A plaintive baying noise cut across the sparse brush. It wasn't the call of a
…no, Dukat recognized
sound. It was a riding hound. The hound bayed mournfully once again; it wasn't long before Dukat heard the familiar galloping cadence of paws against earth, charging right down the middle of the
herd, scattering them, much to Etil'an's consternation. The particular breed used by the Kurabda had no fur whatsoever peeking out between its scales, which were grey, but of a much deeper shade than any person's skin, making this hound look something like a stormcloud on four legs. There was a flash of a large object dangling from the hound's mouth; Dukat couldn't quite make it out as the riding hound streaked by.
Etil'an shouted a command in Kurabda—it took several tries, but eventually the hound froze almost comically mid-gallop and sat on its haunches, thumping its tail on the ground. Unlike the
, the end of the riding hound's tail was devoid of fur and more clublike though it bore the same basic, bifurcated design, the same one often seen on the backfins of Cardassian starships. If necessary, it could be used as a bludgeon against other predatory species, or a rival hound in a fight over a female…or simply used to beat the ground to convey excitement, as it was doing now.
The face, as was typical of the more intelligent predatorial species, had a slightly more personlike aspect than the
: the eyes aimed forward rather than sitting on the sides of the face, and Dukat could clearly distinguish hooked eye ridges much like his own encircling those of the hound—thickest above the eyes, but receding into the face a bit more quickly than his as they traced down from there and around the eyes. The ears were much like that of the
, but taller, narrower, coming to sharper points as they stood from the skull. The ridges were less mobile, more of the musculature in that area needed, as in the direct ancestors of the Cardassians themselves, for the killing bite.
Now Dukat saw what the hound carried in its mouth: the animal gripped its own saddle between its enormous jaws, and gazed expectantly, almost plaintively, at Etil'an—and at its sitting height, the riding hound's intelligent eyes met Etil'an's almost straight on. The herder wasn't the slightest bit intimidated; he just barked another Kurabda command. Gharumef leaned close to Dukat and translated with a whisper, "Drop it!" After the third repetition, the riding hound finally let its saddle fall to the ground, baying once more once its mouth was empty with the typical
sound hounds made.
Etil'an said something else—"Stay!" came the translation—and he strode up to the riding hound, picking up the saddle, carefully avoiding the end that was covered in hound slobber. Now Etil'an, remembering Dukat's presence, began to speak in the common tongue. "Ratoukhit, look at this…you chewed through the seat! You are a crazy boy—how do I sit on this now?"
Though Ratoukhit might not have understood the foreign words Etil'an spoke, he recognized the tone well enough and bowed his head and emitted a tiny, whining noise not unlike a child being chastised. In a way, that was exactly what Ratoukhit was doing; riding hounds possessed a pack instinct that was a stronger equivalent of the Cardassian hierarchical instinct, and this hound was quite aware of the fact that he had displeased one ranked higher than him in the pack.
"I will have to see Intehek about this," Etil'an murmured to himself, still in the common tongue. "He bit a piece almost out of it. Have you learned to ride, Dukat?"
He shook his head, though a touch hesitant.
Not really
. When he was very little, his primary school class had taken a trip to a petting zoo to get a chance to see some of the animals up close that city children would never have a chance to see in person otherwise. He remembered his father, who had managed to clear his docket for a day to be one of the chaperones, lifting him up and putting him on the back of a docile old riding hound.
I didn't
so much as let someone lead us around
, he thought—but at the moment, it had sure felt like the crowning achievement of his brief life.
"You will need help if you ride," Etil'an said—and this made sense. Riding hounds were extremely auditory animals; while they responded to touch commands from their riders, they much preferred to hear the voices of their masters, even if only as a whisper. Being unable to speak, Dukat would have a difficult time bonding on his own with a riding hound, teaching it to heel and obey his wishes. A riding hound without a sense of proper discipline from its master could accidentally throw a rider in its rambunctious sense of play—a state of affairs that hounds seemed to find just as upsetting after the fact as the person unfortunate enough to be thrown.
Thousands of years domesticated, aggression towards Cardassians carefully bred out of them over the millennia, they seemed to truly care for their Cardassian masters, recognizing them as smarter, skilled with weapons and fire, but physically weaker than themselves: creatures at once deserving respect and needing protection. That was why, predatory animals that they were, they willingly allowed themselves to be ridden—it was the instinctive understanding that without them, a person had nowhere near the speed, the ability to rout prey and flee other predators, that they did. They needed the protection a riding hound could offer, as far as the hound was concerned; in return they received companionship, shelter from the elements, and not just the spoils of their own hunts but the great beasts the Cardassians speared or shot at a distance.
And in this relationship was the great blessing about riding hounds, compared to the mounts he had heard of some other species riding, especially the prey-animal steeds: a hound was not filled with the deep and constant fear of the very thing they had been bred to do. The thought unnerved Dukat on some level...to break an animal until it wanted to do something against its nature because no other option was left--it didn't feel right somehow.
Hounds did have to be trained, taught their place in the pack, and taught their own strength so their enthusiasm would injure neither hound nor master, but whatever instinctive fear their ancestors might have had of being saddled and ridden was largely gone. And like Ratoukhit, they often expressed their willingness to carry their Cardassian masters by grabbing pieces of their riding tack in their mouths, if they happened to find it, and presenting it in a hopeful invitation. One could really and truly know that a riding hound
to fulfill its purpose.
Ratoukhit whined quietly once more, shifting his hindquarters in the sand, long snout craned up towards the sky. "I know, boy," Etil'an was saying. Now that Ratoukhit had been sufficiently chastened for sinking his teeth into his saddle and charging through the herd of
, the herder took the time to scratch the riding hound under the chin. "This is not the time—we have guests." He turned back to Dukat. "Maybe someday, you can ride. After your vow…or with someone to lead. Would you like that?"
Dukat smiled, letting the wideness of his eyes and their encircling ridges transmit his pleasure at the thought.
"Now…" Etil'an murmured, "time for you to learn how to skin a
. The kill is already done this time—away from Ratoukhit," he specified. "Never kill the animal a hound guards where it can see you." Dukat nodded understandingly; to do so would suggest to the hound that its charges were instead acceptable prey. "Come with me. I want to see how you use the knife. You will need this for skinning—and for riding. You know why, yes?"
Dukat nodded. Riding hounds shared their kills with their masters as they would with the leaders of their packs. One thing every rider had to be prepared to do—even the most refined competitive rider—was to slice a symbolic bite of meat from any freshly killed prey, lock eyes with the hound, and immediately eat it in the animal's presence, before allowing their steed to partake. Even when pups were first weaned, this was a hard rule that established dominance over the larger, stronger animals: their masters might be far more generous than a fellow riding hound, allowing them nearly all the rewards of their kills, but it was theirs, and theirs always, to take the first spoils and grant permission for the rest. Whatever the hound ate, the master ate from first.
Before they could make it more than a few steps away from the herd and the hound, Ratoukhit stared up into the sky somewhere around the peaks of the distant Noumara Mountains, opened his mouth, and let out a mistrustful, strident
. He no longer thumped the weighted end of his tail on the ground. There was no more excitement…this was urgent—a desperate warning.
At first nothing was obviously wrong. A
hovered overhead, but imposing as the obsidian-feathered carrion-eaters might appear, they would never attack a
, let alone in the presence of a riding hound and a group of Cardassians. Etil'an scrutinized the hound; Gharumef did as well. Ratoukhit still refused to tear his attention from the sky. Whatever the threat was, it was there. Dukat tensed, mentally whispering a prayer to Oralius—what was happening?
His ears did not hear it at first…they were nowhere near as sharp as a riding hound's. Ever since the era of jet travel had passed, aerospace engines had become much quieter though still quite audible at near- and supersonic speeds. These hurtled overhead at what seemed to be just below the speed to avoid a sonic boom. They flew daringly low as they crested over the mountains, their courses straight, unharassed, the ships themselves showing few battle scars in the moments they were visible—
—and they were entirely the wrong shape, the wrong color, not rust and ochre, but maroon with accents of blinding bronze.
No one's fighting them—why is no one fighting them…oh, Oralius, dear Oralius, we've truly fallen! The Bajorans…are those troop carriers?!
Nothing had stopped them—they had to be headed straight for Culat—
Dukat's finger stabbed at the sky, his jaw dropped involuntarily and he emitted a terrified, sharp, yet voiceless gasp that startled him just as much as it did Gharumef and Etil'an.
He wasn't sure what stunned him the most about it: the fact that he'd had enough control, even now, not to cry out despite every nerve in his body clamoring to do so—or the mute sound that
escaped. It almost,
reminded him of the awful sound the dying soldier had made.
He knew how odd his wild gesticulation and voiceless outburst must have seemed to them; he tried to compose himself as quickly as he could, but his effort was faltering at best. His eyes were still so wide, and his hands still trembled and his heart beat furiously in his chest.
He felt something cross into range of his bioelectric sense and he spun, the most primitive part of him wanting to lash out at the intruder—but he breathed deeply, let his eyes focus on the source. It was Gharumef, who had drawn his hand just near enough for Dukat to detect the bioelectric field, but not yet touching. Only after he made eye contact did the warrior lay that hand upon his shoulder…touching a Cardassian without warning in a moment of such extremes could trigger a defensive instinct strong enough that he might strike even the dearest friend or family member before he realized what he was doing.
"Were those the outworlders you told us about when you first came here?" Gharumef questioned.
Dukat confirmed, lips pressed into a tight line that had less to do with suppressing speech and more to do with the awful gravity of the situation.
"We should warn the others," Gharumef determined. "Etil'an…your lesson will have to wait. We will return to inform you as soon as there has been a decision. As for me…I intend to recommend that we break camp. They were headed for Culat; even old Kekil village is too close for me."
Are you a Cardassian fan, citizen? Prove your loyalty--check out my fanfic universe,
Star Trek: Sigils and Unions
. Or keep the faith on my AU Cardassia,
Sigils and Unions: Catacombs of Oralius
Nerys Ghemor
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Hispanic House of Studies Information Session
Wednesday, August 27, 2014 -
0013 Westbrook Building
12:30pm to 1:30pm
0013 Westbrook Building
The Hispanic House of Studies at Duke Divinity School will hold an information meeting on how the it can serve as a resource for students seeking to serve and understand the growing Hispanic and Latino community in the U.S.
The meeting will include information about the Caminantes (Walkers) program for students and pastors, field education placement in Latin America, and the Manos Unidas (United Hands) student group. There also will be a question and answer session. Lunch will be provided.
Applications for the Caminantes program will be available during the Divinity School Orientation Week on Aug. 18-25. The program's first meeting will be held Sept. 2 from 12:30 to 1:30 p.m. in Room 0044 Langford Building.


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I have something I need help with.
I have something I need help with.
Any member with a blue star. Go to the main page and at the bottom you will see a list of names. Click on any of the blue starred names and you will get that mods contact options.
Are you a registered member? Why not? Click here to register. It's free and only takes 27 seconds! Help out the forums, abide by our community guidelines.
I can help you. What do you need?
Interested in the Women's Forum? Send me a PM for more information.
Wow, what service. Cool. Can you work in my IT department?Originally Posted by snowy
$10; $20 would be better.Originally Posted by snowy
So stars next to names are mods? What do the colors indicate - the mod pecking order?
No. All moderators have blue stars. Red stars are members that have upgraded their membership. (made a $25, one-time donation)
"Real wars of words are harder to win. They require thought, insight, precision, articulation, knowledge, and experience. They require the humility to admit when you are wrong. They recognize that the dialectic is not about making us look at you, but about us all looking together for the truth."
So are all the mods also members? I've often wondered that.Originally Posted by donnamb
A damn caste system, I tellya....Originally Posted by donnamb
While possible to get a blue star before a becoming a redstar member, it is quite unlikely. Anyone willing to donate enough time to the forum to be a mod, has likely also been willing to donate a few dollars to its upkeep.Originally Posted by Bikepacker67
OP - hope you got your issue resolved by a mod already, if not, feel free to pm any one of us.
Well maybe the OP is satisfied, but where's my $10?Originally Posted by cuda2k
Right here, waiting for you to come pick it up.Originally Posted by I-Like-To-Bike
If you want to send the $20 shipping cost, that would be OK too.


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Hard-driving Steve David in the Oh Boy! Oberto passes the Graham Trucking boat driven by Jimmy Shane during Sunday's qualifying heats for the APBA Gold Cup on the Detroit River. / PHOTOS BY Kirthmon F. Dozier/Detroit Free Press
Before Sundays APBA Gold Cup, Steve David told me it was his to lose.
Well, he was right: He managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory Sunday on the Detroit River.
It didnt help that H1 Unlimited Hydroplane Series officials took a bite out of David by issuing him three one-lap penalties, two for lane violations in the U-1 Oh Boy! Oberto.
David, who is 59 and the best unlimited hydroplane racer competing, had the field covered on the first lap of the final. He probably could have carried the boat across the finish line and won.
Instead, his aggressive, attacking style of driving cost him a chance to finally win the oldest active trophy in motor sports and one his name is not on.
To say David was angry at officials after the race is sugar-coating it. He was fuming, although somehow he still could joke.
David called officials names that cant be printed here. But we can report a couple of things he said of those officials: These guys couldnt mind a kindergarten.
And they were a bunch of clowns not the funny kind.
David lost the race on an infraction coming off the Roostertail Turn basically by being too aggressive. He didnt hit anyone, like they do in NASCAR, but he paid the price and added a fourth-place finish to 12 runner-up performances in powerboats most prestigious event.
David, a successful realtor, might not be back here next year. Hell probably decide that after the last race of the series in San Diego in September.
I watched a replay of the Gold Cup final at H1 Unlimited Hydroplane again and didnt see why David was slapped with a one-lap penalty in the final, but what do I know about the intricacies of this special sport? It looked clean to me, but apparently it was dirty.
What I do know is Detroit is lucky to still have the Gold Cup. It might have gone away had not the folks at the Detroit Yacht Club and Jarvis Property Restoration, based in Harrison Township, stepped up with cash and saved it.
The banks of the Detroit River were lined with fans watching Sundays Gold Cup, from the Roostertail banquet center to the Belle Isle Bridge. David lost the race, but the Motor City managed to salvage it for at least another year.
This event is a gem that fits snugly in southeast Michigans Triple Crown of motor sports the June and August NASCAR races at Michigan International Speedway (well count them as one), the Belle Isle IndyCar Series weekend (they ran two races this year, too) and the APBA Gold Cup races.
Lets hope there will be boats in the water this time next year.
And that maybe Steve David will return and win the trophy that has eluded him so long.
Contact Mike Brudenell: 313-222-2115 or firstname.lastname@example.com. Follow him on Twitter @mikebrudenell.


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We Are Very Proud Of What We Do!
Day after day,
customers tell us our versions smell better than the originals
Perhaps the lack of alcohol and, in many cases, higher quality oils than those found in the "original" makes the difference. Ounce for ounce, our fragrance bottles contain fifteen to twenty times as much pure fragrance oil as the typical Eau de Toilette, but choosing pure fragrance oils is not so much a question of
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text:
Hertz Gets FTC Approval, Gets Closer to Driving Off With Dollar Thrifty
Subscriber Content Read Preview
Subscriber Content Read Preview
If Hertz's attempt to buy Dollar Thrifty was a car rental analogy, Hertz would now have made it all the way through the long line, navigated the slick front-desk salesperson trying to get it to upgrade its car and buy more insurance, and managed to find its car in the vast parking lot.
Today, with regulatory approval, it now has the keys in the ignition and can start to drive.
All it has to do is get out the exit without wrecking its tires by backing up over those giant spikes.
The Federal Trade Commission announced its approval today, a move expected since Hertz agreed to part with more airport locations across the country. Hertz agreed to include those locations along with its earlier plan to sell Advantage Rent A Car business along with other assets.
Hertz had spent two years, and a costly bidding war with rival Avis, before winning Dollar Thrifty earlier this year. After a go-shop period ended without a competitive bid, Hertz wound up in a bigger antitrust tussle than expected.
But now it is clear to wrap up the deal, and drive off the lot in its shiny new asset.
Hertz is now in the final laps of its seemingly eternal quest to buy Dollar Thrifty and appears to have finally pushed the pesky competition off to the side.
Dollar Thrifty announced today its so-called go-shop period had expired and while it had "solicited inquiries from third parties," no one submitted a proposal to acquire it.
One can imagine Hertz was sweating that one out after two years of back and forth in a race for the auto-rental chain with archrival Avis Budget Group. When Hertz announced it had agreed to a $2.3 billion deal for Dollar Thrifty a month ago, it appeared unlikely that Avis would come back again.
Avis and Dollar Thrifty both denied there were any talks going on, and Hertz had more than doubled its offer from 2010, which kicked off this horse race in the first place. But one can never be sure, an offer during the go-shop was always a possibility.
Today, executives from Express Scripts and Medco will march over to Capitol Hill to defend the companies' proposed $29.1 billion merger — the second-biggest-deal announced so far this year.
With the government already suing to block the year's biggest deal, AT&T's proposed $39 billion takeover of T-Mobile USA, Express Scripts and Medco want to break the precedent.
Later this afternoon, the companies will kick off the Washington wooing with a 3:30 p.m. ET hearing before the House Judiciary Subcommittee on Intellectual Property, Competition and the Internet.
The U.S. Federal Trade Commission — one of Washington's two top antitrust cops — already is scrutinizing the merger. Investors also are plenty skeptical about the deal coming to fruition. The stock price of Medco is trading more than 20% below the value of the deal — an unusually wide gap.
Usually, when companies get the U.S. government's permission to proceed with a merger or acquisition, they start right in on combining the businesses. In Dow Chemical's $15.3 billion acquisition of rival Rohm & Haas, the two companies must roll up their sleeves just to get the deal closed. The Federal Trade Commission today cleared the […]
Deal Journal is an up-to-the-minute take on the deals and deal makers that shape the landscape of Wall Street, including mergers and acquisitions, capital-raising, private equity and bankruptcy. In short, wherever money changes hands. Deal Journal is updated throughout each trading day with exclusive commentary, analysis, data, news flashes and profiles. The Wall Street Journal's David Benoit is the lead writer, with contributions from other Journal reporters and editors. Send news items, comments and questions to email@example.com.
In Asia, Deal Journal writers include Isabella Steger in Hong Kong and Gillian Tan in Sydney. They can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.com and firstname.lastname@example.com
Dealpolitik is Ronald Barusch's strategic look at deals currently making the headlines as well as the major forces at work in the deal-making world. He was a M&A lawyer with Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom for over 30 years. He retired in 2010 after 25 years as a partner at the firm. Click here for his current and archived columns.
Content engaging our readers now, with additional prominence accorded if the story is rapidly gaining attention. Our WSJ algorithm comprises 30% page views, 20% Facebook, 20% Twitter, 20% email shares and 10% comments.


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*Populations and Disease
Featured Courses: Populations and Disease
What is a pandemic and why do some diseases spark fears of a widespread outbreak when others do not? And why do some diseases spread disproportionately among particular segments of a population during an outbreak? This course uses a public health methodology to break down the complex factors of this fascinating and timely topic. (Image source: Wikimedia Commons)
Course Description:
Diseases can manifest differently in different segments of a population based on a combination of genetic, biological, environmental and/or social factors. In this course students use an epidemiological approach to interpret and understand how diseases manifest themselves and impact populations differently. The course is organized around a careful examination of six diseases that may (or may not) affect populations differently. Concepts of risk, exposure, prevention and treatment are explored and students learn analytic skills while becoming familiar with publicly available data on the select diseases. Students read, write and research together and individually to learn to think critically about published scientific findings.
Featured Activity: Visiting the Grocery Store
The purpose of this exercise is to increase your awareness of food availability, quality, and affordability in the context of the social environment provided by your local grocery store. You will examine how the presentation of food items effects the foods you buy and the way that you, your family and your community eats. Seen through the lens of the public health problems created by obesity on the one hand and malnutrition on the other, food availability and selection represent a significant public healthy issue.
The two documents linked below (PDF format) describe this exercise and they are intended to be printed so that you can take them with you to the grocery store during your investigation. The first page provides a grid containing 10 aisles, and subdivided into cells, that you will use to "map" where different types of food are found at your local grocery store. To complete the investigation you'll fill in the grid using food type codes from the second page.
Grocery store grid (schematic layout): shoppingGrid.pdf
Food codes and comparisons: codes_tables.pdf
Page 1: Grocery Store Diagram
Your market may not look exactly like this, but that's okay!
Most food stores have multiple aisles and displays all around the edge.
If you shop in a Wal-Mart type super store, just include the portion of the store in which the food is located. Use your judgment.
- If your market has fewer than 10 aisles: cross out the extra aisles or mark that on your diagram.
- If your market has more than 10 aisles: you may "double-up" actual aisles onto the diagram. For example, write food market aisle 1 & 2 contents onto the first aisle of the diagram. Just label the aisles on the diagram. Or, you can use 2 copies of page 1, crossing out the extra side perimeter region.
Page 2: Food Codes and Comparisons
- You should use the food codes for filling out the Layout. The codes are meant for readability. The table has 5 blank spots, which you may use to add categories which are of interest to you.
- There are 3 tables to be used for comparing food within a specific category. Take this page to the market with you, so that you may jot down information as you go through your shopping.
- Diagram Submission Guidelines:
When you have completed the diagram, please submit it to me in one of two ways:
- If you have access to a scanner, you may scan the document into your computer and attach it below along with your essay
- If you do not have access to a scanner, you may mail it to me at the following mailing address: Amy Bloom Empire State College 111 West Avenue Saratoga Springs, NY 12866.Please make sure to put your name on the document!
Essay Submission Guidelines:
Along with the diagram, please compose a brief essay on your experience observing and diagramming your local grocery store.
Make sure to address the following key points:
- Identify and comment on where foods are located or grouped throughout the store
- Identify and comment on the cost and quality of different foods of the same type.
- Compare the cost and quality of any fruit available in your store. Find a fresh (organic and non-organic if available), frozen, canned, dried or any other form available in your store.Which is the most expensive?Least expensive?How does the cost relate to the overall quality of the fruit you selected?
- Compare the cost and quality of any vegetable available in your store. Find a fresh (organic and non-organic if available), frozen, canned, dried or any other form available in your store.Which is the most expensive?Least expensive?How does the cost relate to the overall quality of the fruit you selected?
- Take a portion of the money you spend on groceries for the week (e.g. $50 or whatever you are comfortable with) and see what it can buy you at your local grocery store – what are different ways to spend $50?Notice what, how much you purchase (or don't)! Think about how big (or small) your family is. Does your family have health issues, allergies, etc? How does this come into play with what you can or cannot afford to purchase?
- Notice and record how long it takes you to find different items on your list.Why do you think certain foods are more easily identifiable in the store than others?


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The Holiday Neighborhood in Boulder, CO
Holiday News, Announcements, and Upcoming Events
Click here to subscribe to your Holiday Neighborhood list-serv.
Chat with your neighbors. Organize events, find help, meet new friends, recycle stuff, and share your ideas about how to make a great neighborhood even better.
Little Lending Library
What's the Holiday Neighborhood Eco Pass?
An Eco Pass is an annual transit pass that allows for free, unlimited access to all Local, Express, and Regional bus and light rail routes across the RTD network in Boulder and the Denver metropolitan area. For example, the SKIP and Route #204 bus routes serve our neighborhood. A trip to DIA on the AB bus route, AKA the SkyRide, is $2.50 each way and includes free rides for children under the age of 16. You can find loads of useful information on the main RTD web site at www.rtd-denver.com/index.shtml
More information about the Holiday Neighborhood Eco PassDownload Eco Pass Presentation from 2015 Annual Meeting


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By On the occasion of our 20th anniversary
Why Do Mexis Like Wrought-Iron Fences?
By Gustavo Arellano
By R. Scott Moxley
By Alfonso Delgado
Women For: OC are Stitching and Bitching
By Courtney Hamilton
Santa Ana River Ready for Its Renaissance
By Joel Beers
By Peter Maguire
Can Tech Ruin the Kim Pham Murder Trial?
By Charles Lam
Sunday, May 29
Saw MadHotBallroomwith my family today. It's a great movie, one that will renew your faith and hope in America, immigrants, schools, kids, teachers and the rumba.It was so good, even our finicky film critics liked it. EllaTaylorcalled it "so much fun, I wanted it to go on forever . . ." Wait, that wasn't Ella Taylor. That was the Register'sGordonDillowwriting about the IraqWar.
Monday, May 30
Oh, and about that. DickCheney,ever the voice of calm and reason, says he thinks we'll be out of Iraq by 2009.And who wouldn't trust Cheney, who pushed for the war because of weapons of mass destruction that didn'texistand because there was a long-standing connection between Saddam Hussein and al Qaeda that never occurred? But on this Memorial Day (1,650 Americandeadin Iraq and counting), Cheney seems certain. In fact, we haven't seen anyone this certain regarding Iraq since Cheney's "boss," George W. Bush, announced an end to major combat operations while standing on an aircraft carrier flight deck in front of a banner reading "Mission Accomplished."That was two years ago.
Tuesday, May 31
Today, in one of his semi-annual press conferences, an especially shrilland boastfulGeorge W.Bush declares that he was the first person to realize SocialSecuritywas in danger, that the United Nations is an important organization and that he thinks it's important to use diplomacy to solve our problems with other countries (1,650 and counting). For a man whose image is so closely molded and guarded, who looks so good on the flight deck of an aircraft carrier reading someone else's words, it's a wonderful opportunity for Americans to see what the guy really is: smirky,smugand small.Thank God he talks.
Sponsor Content


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(443): View more from Maryland
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
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I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Are you still giving blowjobs?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt


text:
Having gone to Kentucky many times when my Mom was living I found a wonderful Kentucky best kept secret back then Ale-8-one Ginger Ale it is just wonderful with Bourbon! It is a special Ginger Ale only made in Winchester KY made since 1926 it is a mix of fruit flavors and ginger and with Whiskey it is just awesome. I was lucky enough to have someone bring me some last summer after years and been using it since! So not only do great Whiskies come from KY but also an amazing Ginger Ale. I first found it back in the early 1980's and always brought some home. If you Live there give it a try as the soda you use to mix!
Dave Z
Old Hickory America's Most Magnificent Bourbon


text:
There is always confusion and less knowledge about the central excise duty on different products. The excise duty is vary from product to product and in manufacturing line, it is necessary to know the excise duty rate well before the start of production. In this annual budget, the rates of excise duty have been increased to 12% from the existing 10%. This rate will be applicable from 01-04-2012. But it is not that all the products have similar excise duty. The excise duty can be different in these points which are as under.
Mar 22, 2012
Central excise duty rate for financial year 2012-13
Nitin Aggarwal central excise
- Totally exempt excise duty such as tea and condensed milk.
- 1% excise duty on the products which have the facility of less excise duty like articles of jewellery.
- 3% excise like gold
- 6% excise on paper, cotton and biscuits etc.
- 12% excise on motor vehicles
- Production base excise duty on aluminum circles and trimmed and untrimmed circles of copper.
- High excise duty on large cars, cigarettes and tobacco products.
So there is a complete list of excise duty products as well as no excise duty products with rate of duty on different products.
See the complete list from here


text:
Alex Kidd in Miracle World
- Released on Jun 23, 2008
Alex Kidd in Miracle World review
The good:
Sega's old mascot's debut proves excellent
Excellently executed and fun "pick up and play" platforming gameplay with some original elements of its own, vibrant graphics, excellent and catchy soundtrack (especially the upbeat boss battle song), quirky sound effects, incredibly tight controls and a balanced yet challenging difficulty level.The bad:
Frustrating at times, lacks a save feature and items in the shops cost too much money.Summary:
Released in 1986 by Sega, Alex Kidd in Miracle World takes huge amounts of influence from Super Mario Brothers, but adds a lot of it's own elements to the mix. While it didn't quite have the same impact that Super Mario Brothers did as a whole, it gave the Sega Master System initial life the same way SMB gave the NES some, and became one of the most recognized Alex Kidd, ney, Sega Master System game. It's not perfect, but it's one hell of a game nonetheless.
Alex Kidd, as a series, was the Mario of the Sega Master System, but to many people, he just warms up the mascot spot for Sonic. He was a force to be dealt with on the Sega Master System (and that one game of his on the Genesis was quite good too), however, he only managed 5 or 6 games before dying. When was the last time anybody talked about Alex Kidd? Oh, maybe between retro (like 8-bit era retro) Sega junkies talking about how Sonic sucks and Alex Kidd rules all, or how Sonic The Hedgehog (360/PS3 version) would've kicked so much ass as an Alex Kidd game aka his revival (well, get rid of the glitches and many of the Sonic-related stuff and put Alex Kidd stuff in, there, perfect). He was involved in a fair variety of games, like a few platformers, a Shinobi crossover and even a BMX game (the latter of which was released only in Japan). However, I just want the rest of this review to cover this near-legendary classic beginning to a strong 8-bit series which apparently just warmed up fans for Sonic's arrival.
Much like with Super Mario Brothers, when I first bought this game, I was playing this game often. And by often, I meant a whole lot. I went as far as playing for more than the recommended amount (I played 4 hours a day...this was actually a lot for a 4 year old). Also, this came with the second model Sega Master Systems (in fact, it was built in), so this would be a lot of people's first Sega Master System game. Lastly, I always come back and play this game because it's still a challenging game to play once in a while. Although unlike Super Mario Brothers, this game has a few problems, though these don't break the game, they just prove to be little annoyances. More on them later.
There is a story, but it's just some filler about princes, take-overs, kidnappings and Jan-Ken-Pon which would seem interesting back in 1986...but it feels like a rehash of Super Mario Brothers, with Alex as Mario, Janken as Bowser and Alex's little brother Egle as Peach, just have Bowser sending out 3 henchmen (Rock Head, Scissor Head and Paper Head) as bosses instead of constant rehashes of himself at different levels, while taking out the classic "the princess is in another castle" line and just going to the next level. Again, would seem pretty interesting in 1986, but in 2008, not so much. Ah well, at least Sega tried to incorporate a sort of story and have a Mario of their own.
The basic gist of the gameplay is that you must run, jump and swim your way through 16 stages to get to Janken's Castle and rescue your little brother. As you'd expect with platformers, there's platforms to jump on, a linear path to follow to the finish and enemies to slaughter. Your only means of defense is your fist! Sorry folks, but Alex can't just slam onto his enemies, he'd die if he does that! Instead, you punch your enemies...with your large fist! No, not like Battletoads which EXAGGERATES their large fist sizes, but still, Alex seems to have a fairly large fist to kill enemies with. Some enemies won't die to your fist, so just dodge/avoid them. There's also some form of money to collect, but instead of coins, you get bags with the Yen (Japanese currency's name) sign on it. Unlike the coins, the Yen of this game is actually used to buy items from shops. You do not get free lives from collecting a certain number of these, which could be considered a real bummer, but you can buy free lives from shops, so that adds up I guess. So basically, it's a platformer where you go through levels, buying items when you can.
The items you buy in the game vary from a motorcycle, a helicopter, a free life, and more. There's a fair range to be exact. Here's the catch - you need to figure out what you need to buy to beat the level easier, and what you shouldn't waste your money on. For example, in level 2, you'll need that motorcycle to pass the level more quickly and without dying. However, don't think you can buy a vehicle and just zoom through the level, as there are obstacles which can destroy your vehicle and leave you running through it or even dying. I find this to be a good challenge, because if you buy a vehicle and nothing can destroy it, then the game would be too easy. Among buying items, there are some items you don't even have to buy, as you can find some in boxes or even out in the open. Consider yourself lucky that you find the item. To equip the item, you press start, move your cursor over to the item and press button 1 to equip it (oh btw you automatically use the vehicles), then try it out. Be aware that you can only equip this until you either finish the level or die, so this makes conservation a good idea. My major gripe with the shops is that they charge too much for items. Money is common enough, but at times, it doesn't add up enough. Hardly any enemies, if any, drop money when the are defeated, and bosses don't hand out money either. This makes having to choose items to buy at the shops a huge matter of trial and error - if you buy the wrong item, you die or the level will just take longer. The game is a very hard one partially because of this.
And yes, this game is quite difficult. Aside from a few occasions, this isn't unfairly difficult or anything, it's all legit! Just that you have to actually practise and memorize the levels' patterns, as well as bringing common sense to the table as many areas...well, they simply require it, okay!? Where you'll need this common sense is mostly against the bosses. Boss battles in this game aren't just about punching the hell out of the enemy. Instead, make way for... JAN! KEN! PON! That's right folks, a good old fashioned game of rock, paper, scissors! Except against Janken, you should have a good idea of what will be picked...by just looking at their heads! Rock Head = rock, Paper Head = paper and Scissors Head = scissors. Just remember that rock > scissors, scissors > paper and paper > rock. However, there are some times where they'll change to a different sign and totally destroy you. The only sure-fire way to know what they'll pick is to get a Telepathy Orb and equip it. It works 97% of the time, but there's a 3% chance they'll change at the last second, causing loss. Better sharpen those reflexes...you may need to make snap decisions here! Adding onto that, it's best 2 out of 3, so if you win 2 times, you defeat the boss. However, if they win 2 out of 3, you lose a life. You will meet these bosses again, but in the last level, and alongside the Jan-Ken-Pon game, you'll have to punch their heads when they fly out at you. Geez! Oh by the way, if the heads touch you, you lose a life..but you probably figured that out already.
And when I speak of lives, I'll also speak of this game's biggest flaw - a lack of saving. Starting with the lives system: If you get hit once by an enemy or fall down a pit, you lose a life. There are no magic mushrooms to increase your health, so get used to constantly dodging enemies! Strategic placement is the name of the game - take every little thing you find in this game as if it's a strategy. See an enemy? Punch it! See an enemy in the air and there's a pit? Wait until it moves far enough away from you that you can jump over the pit, and either pray you dodge the enemy or just punch it. Whatever it is, think about every move, and be quick. Enemies don't wait for you to think, you need to be quick with this. If you die because of misplacement of yourself, touching an enemy or falling down a pit, you'll lose a life. You lose all 3 of your lives, and you get game over. There are some extra lives, but they cost a lot of money in the shops which are better used for other items, and they are few and far between. This game will try to challenge you at every corner. This is a game for someone who wants a true challenge, however, no save system is just annoying. There's 16 levels to go through, which is half of what Super Mario Brothers has, but Alex Kidd In Miracle World is at least 4 times harder than Super Mario Brothers, so that should say a lot. And when you get game over, you start from level 1! Yeah, you can get to level 15 and lose all your lives there. Sorry mate, but you're back at level 1. No continues, no password, no nothing. That's harsh! It's like if you play this game, you have to be hardcore! If you're not sure of the difficulty, imagine Super Mario Brothers, but divide the number of stages in half, change bosses around and multiply the difficulty by 4. Again, that's harsh! A few continues or a password would be nice, Sega!
Don't worry folks, as hard as it seems, it's still fair, and (aside from a few instances) if you die, it's your own fault. Sorry to seem harsh, but the controls are tight enough to get used to quickly and respond very well, so there's nobody to blame for losing lives but yourself. Speaking of which, the controls are simple enough; button 1 for jumping and button 2 for punching (this is reversed for the built-in version of this game), while the D-pad moves you left and right. There's no ducking but unlike Megaman, Alex doesn't really need to duck much, as there's a bit of room to jump or just evade projectiles. Also depending on what vehicle you have, controls will be altered slightly. The motorbike will always move forward. Pressing right will speed you up, and pressing left will slow you down, and you can't punch enemies, though you can just run them over. In the helicopter, there's a lot of button mashing to do to stay in the air, and no punching! There are other examples I can write here, but the point is, they're responsive and a little experimenting can go a long way when you're trying to figure out what does what for what.
In terms of audio/visual, expect awesomess at...nearly every corner.
Visually, this game is stunning! As one of the first games for the Sega Master System, this completely destroys Super Mario Brothers's graphics. In fact, I can't think of too many NES games in general with such colorful backgrounds and foregrounds, among platforms and, well, the whole game really! For the audio, you'll be hearing some catchy tunes! This proves that a small quantity can work...somewhat. Yeah, unfortunately, while the soundtrack proves catchy and well done for an 8-bit title, there are hardly any different songs. Unless you're swimming, playing jan-ken-pon with bosses or in the last level, you'll be hearing the same tune over and over again. Now, I like it, I really do, but it does get a bit repetitive after some time. 15, maybe 14 stages of hearing this tune over and over can either prove repetitive and annoying, or reptitive but sweet! Anyway, there's also a tune for swimming, which sounds a fair bit aquatic-like, then a dreary tune for the last level, both of which aren't as good. Then there's my personal favorite of the bunch; the boss battle tunes! Incredibly upbeat and vibrant, just like the graphics! Just brilliant in general! Sound effects are just as well done, while a bit repetitive. However, they are also quite...quirky? Yeah, a bit weird if you ask me, though thankfully it's the good kind of weird. They're your typical 8-bit sound effects, but a bit more glorified as Sega had better access to better sound effect creating tools than Nintendo did. Overall, the audio/visual aspect of this game is full of win!
All in all, Alex Kidd In Miracle World may seem nearly impossible, but it's anything but. It's just quite challenging, that's all. With a lack of passwords or even continues for that matter, you may feel less inclined to play this game a second time after finishing it once to go through with frustration all over again, but if you lust for a challenge or like one, this game will provide you with one hell of it. If you're looking for an easier game, look into this series a bit more, as I find this to be the hardest of the Alex Kidd series. But hey, it also proves to be one hell of a beginning to one of Sega's most powerful, but forgotten, game series. I recommend purchasing this or playing it at least once before you die.
Gameplay: 9/10
At times, it proves frustrating, but when you're playing a platformer with a fair bit of innovation in the 80's, frustration is inevitable and outweighed by innovation. Plus, it's platforming 101! How can the non-frustration be bad?
Graphics: 5/5
Bright, exuberant, vibrant, colorful, call it what you want, these are astoundingly good for 8-bit graphics!
Sound: 4.5/5
While this has few songs, the soundtrack is quite catchy and well executed. Sound effects are also very noteworthy and weird (in a good way).
Control: 4/5
A bit hard to control Alex when he's swimming, but outweighed by very tight controls which are very responsive on the land. Depending on what version of this game you have (cartridge or built-in), jumping and punching controls may swap and feel a bit unnatural...at first.
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