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I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
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I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You almost set me on fire last night.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you've lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I cant shower it involves moving...
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I was tackling you out of excitement
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down


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Traditional methods of preserving rosemary include drying, freezing and vacuum sealing. / File photo/The Journal News
- Filed Under
Rosemary doesn't do well in our local winters so it's best to overwinter these herbs indoors. / File photo by Carucha L. Meuse/ The Journal News
Q: With cold weather approaching, how do I preserve the rosemary which has been growing so well in my garden?
A: Rosemary, famous in legend to increase memory and as a symbol of remembrance, is a culinary herb that, in our climate, must be overwintered indoors in a cool, sunny and humid location. If left outdoors, it will not likely overwinter due to heaving of the soil and it doesnt like wet feet. Rosemary enhances the flavor of meats, such as lamb, pork, poultry, beef, stews, stuffing, vegetables and can be infused into vinegars, jams and herb butters. In world cuisines, it is most popularly used in Italian dishes such as abbacchio, a traditional Easter lamb dish as well as in Greek cooking, particularly on skewered meats.
Hint: When harvesting rosemary, remember to clip the top 2-3 inches from each stem and never completely trim down the plant, as it may not recover.
Traditional methods of preserving rosemary include drying, freezing and vacuum sealing. Drying rosemary will preserve more of the flavor, but vacuum sealing is the easiest method, allowing the herb to retain its dark green color and maintain its texture. Freezing into ice cube trays provides a quick way to toss into soups and sauces.
Drying method: Gather the sprigs in loose bundles and secure with string or a rubber band. Place in small brown paper bags that have been slit to allow for air circulation. The bags prevent dust gathering on the rosemary, while preventing the sun from bleaching out the color. Slitting more holes in the paper bag will prevent mildew and lessens moisture build-up. Hang the bag upside down in a warm and dry place until the leaves become brittle, about 2 weeks. Crumble the leaves from the stems and place the leaves in an airtight container and store in a dark and cool place, such as a kitchen cupboard. Because of its pungency, use with care as the taste of dried rosemary can be strong.
Quick dry method: Pre-heat the oven to its lowest temperature setting and place the chopped or clipped rosemary leaves onto a parchment-paper-lined cookie sheet. Cook on the top shelf of the oven for 2-4 hours until it crumbles and form a funnel with the parchment paper and place dried herbs into a jar, seal tightly and store in a cool, dry place.
Freezing method: Remove as much moisture as possible from the rinsed and picked-through leaves by patting with a paper towel. Remove any tough stems and chop up the leaves, placing a teaspoon or two into each compartment of an ice cube tray. Top off with water and place in the freezer. Once frozen, the cubes can be placed individually in an air-tight plastic bag and stored in the freezer until ready to use in soups and sauces (after thawing and straining through a sieve).
Vacuum sealing method: Store small bunches in special bags provided with your vacuum sealer but be sure to remove all the air from the bag before sealing. Label and date the bags, which can be stored in your freezer for six months.
Rosemary Infused Vinegar
This makes a great gift
1 bottle of good quality apple cider or wine vinegar (made from leftover wine)
3-4 sprigs of fresh rosemary, washed and patted dry
1 clove garlic, optional
3-4 peppercorns, optional
1 decorative bottle with a cap, cork or stopper and your personalized label
1. Place rosemary sprigs into the decorative bottle and add the apple cider or wine vinegar.
2. Seal tightly with a cap, cork or stopper.
3. Allow to cure for 2 weeks and gently shake daily to mix the flavors.
JoAnn DiRico Trautmann, Master Gardener Training Coordinator, Cornell Cooperative Extension of Westchester

subset: commoncrawl


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Pregnancy Glow or Pregnancy Beast?
Which are you? Do you have that blissful smile and full of encouragement and love for other pregnant women or women trying to conceive, or did your hormones make you a big bag of negative energy? If you can't answer--ask that hubby for his honest opinion...lol! I probably was a handful during my first few weeks cause I've never been as sick as I was in the beginning of this pregnancy, but for the most part I can't stop smiling and encouraging other mothers (except for the occasional "am I pregnant question" in these forums--but I am a grouch only rarely).
This pregnancy... Grouchy crouchy grouchy lol


text:
Description: Luke Desmond takes control of bad boy Billy Roberts in this video. Bound tightly, Luke takes his time opening Billy's tight hole. Billy moans with pleasure and the ***** as his ass cheeks are stretched and ******* by Luke and a selection of dildos from small to fucking massive! After a hard anal..
Duration: 02:00
Views: 1396
Date: 37 months ago
Uploader: boynapped


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A few of my favourite places ~ Four Blogs I Love
Today I'm sharing a few of my favourite places in the blogosphere. I might make this a monthly post, where I share some of the places that have inspired me lately. I hope you enjoy these sites as much as I do. :)
Blog Facebook Pinterest
Don't you just love it when a blog you follow shares a link for somewhere else? You click your way over there, have a bit of a look around and before you know it you've clicked on another link. Meandering through the blogosphere from place to place and then, suddenly, you land somewhere truly wonderful. Somewhere that makes you want to stay, not click away. That's how I found Julia's Bookbag. I challenge you to read any post from this loveliest of lovely sites and not have a smile on your face by the time you finish reading. Julia's Bookbag is written by Melissa, (Julia is her adorable daughter). Melissa's passion for books is what motivated her to create Julia's Bookbag, but you'll find so much more than books there. It's one of those places where you feel like you've just poured a cup of tea and you're having a chat in the kitchen with a lovely lovely friend.
Blog Pinterest
I've been following Tea For Monkeys for a couple of months now and it makes me smile whenever I see a new post in my inbox. Written by Davina, (seriously one of the loveliest ladies you will meet in blog-land), Tea For Monkeys features stunning photographs, fun kid's art and craft projects, learning adventures, gluten-free recipes and the general craziness of family life! I pretty much pin every single post onto my Pinterest boards. :)
Blog Facebook Pinterest Twitter
The lovely Andie from Crayon Freckles is definitely a blogger with a conscience. Just check out this post. Andie home-preschools her sweet son Bear and shares the greatest ideas for fun and educational activities. If you're looking for ways to make learning fun, this is the place for you.
Blog Facebook Pinterest
I've shared Gina's blog, famiglia&seoul, with you before and I'm sure this won't be the last time I send you her way. Gina writes her blog as a letter to her son. She has set her family a 365 day outdoor challenge where she aims to spend at least 15 minutes outside, every single day for an entire year, no matter what the weather. You'll find plenty of inspiration for simple ways to play and learn, as well as ideas for making meaningful family connections.
If this is your first time visiting One Perfect Day – welcome! If you like what you have found, please join us on our Facebook page. We are always sharing new ideas to play, learn, create and explore.
Ness! How wonderful to see your lovely and kinds words here about us! (I left a comment before but I think it didn't go through — user error :) I'm so glad you enjoy coming to visit. Your thoughtfulness is so much appreciated — making friends like you makes blogging such a joy! xoxoxo
Also, I cannot find an email contact for you and I wanted to pop a question to you, can you let me know your email? XO!
Hi Ness! Thanks so much for the kind words about the blog!!!! I too am SO delighted to have found you as friend through this blogging world. Also, I just meandered over to Julia's Bookbag the other day, after seeing it on your sidebar, and love it. It is always wonderful to see where people are getting their inspirations…and I know if you like it, it is bound to be good;-)
You are so right about Melissa! Thanks for the link to Familgia and Seoul, I have seen it on fb but didn't know how to find her for some reason. And I'm excited to check out the other two! Hooray!
Get more traffic to your blog http://goo.gl/yAsbiw


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Today, Juniper Networks reached a major milestone in our software-defined networking (SDN) roadmap. We made 4 key announcements. We announced the production-ready availability of Juniper Networks Contrail, our SDN controller, and introduced an open-source version of the same controller, OpenContrail. We also unveiled a number of partnerships to help support the adoption of the technology that promises to reshape the industry. In our material about the new product, you will see that we talk about "bringing networking into the cloud era." I want to take a moment and explain what that really means for our customers.
Both enterprises and services providers are looking to the cloud to help them move their businesses forward, but for very different reasons. For enterprises, the cloud makes workloads and applications more dynamic. Before organizations can take advantage of that benefit, they need an infrastructure that is optimized for private and public cloud services. For service providers, either traditional network service providers or cloud service providers, they need a quick way to deliver new services and increase the time to revenue.
What does this have to do with networking? Two key tenets of the cloud are flexibility and multi-tenancy. Today's organizations need to spin up resources on demand and securely segment traffic. Fundamentally, these are networking challenges. The network has to provide connectivity, dynamically and on-demand, and it needs to do it securely. Because the networking capabilities in traditional virtualization and cloud software stacks are rather rudimentary, a lot of the heavy lifting gets pushed to the physical network. Multi-tenancy is most often accomplished by configuring VLANs on physical switches, which limits scale and flexibility, while also making the physical network more complex.
Introducing Juniper Networks Contrail , our SDN solution which now helps extend advanced IP networking capabilities into the virtual world. Contrail can dynamically create virtual networks via a hypervisor, connecting virtualized resources both to each other and to the physical network. Contrail is unique in that the standard protocols used to do this are no different than the ones used in physical networks worldwide i.e. BGP, MPLS, XMPP, etc., hence it can integrate seamlessly with any infrastructure
Juniper is building on our heritage and expertise in networking and combining that experience with cloud technologies like virtualization and a scale out architecture. The company is known as an innovator in the networking industry for bringing together physical infrastructures with market-leading routing, switching and security portfolios. It's time to extend the innovation into software and the virtual world with Contrail.
Contrail delivers proven, stable networking protocols and a rich set of networking capabilities at the virtual layer, making it unlike other SDN solutions on the market today. Juniper now offers an open, simple to deploy and agile networking platform that brings networking into the cloud era.
What does Contrail offer to our Customers
Contrail helps enterprises deploy hybrid cloud scenarios, so they can dynamically shift workloads and applications between private and public clouds. Read more on how enterprises can use Contrail.
For Service Providers, Contrail has the ability to dynamically spin up and chain together virtualized services, which is important to network operators looking to adopt network functions virtualization (NFV). Through seamless integration with Juniper Networks' flagship virtual firewall, Firefly, Contrail provides unparalleled performance, scale and coverage across virtualized data centers. Read more on how Service Providers can use Contrail.
A Little Help from Our Friends
Today, Juniper also announced partnerships with several leading technology providers who are integrating their applications and services with Contrail. With this integration, customers can get simplified orchestration, provisioning and management of service-chained virtual and physical security services. We see customers looking at Contrail in conjunction with these other services as a way to move the managed services that are presently delivered on physical CPE devices (NAT, Firewall, etc.) into the network to be run as virtualized services.
Ultimately, customers are looking for a way to automate this virtual stack and connect it to cloud orchestration platforms. We have enabled Contrail to integrate with the REST API via Openstack and Apache CloudStack. We have partnerships with several cloud orchestration partners – Red Hat, Citrix, Cloudscaling, Mirantis and Canonical, as well as a strategic partnership with IBM Smart Cloud Orchestrator, one of the world's largest Openstack implementations.
The best part of the announcement is our customers are excited to talk about their Contrail beta deployments. We have case studies from SunGard, ISPRIME, Jaguar Network, and one of the largest telecom providers. All the customer case studies are available here, including an overview of how Contrail is helping them solve their most pressing business challenges.
Today, Juniper made networking history with Contrail and OpenContrail because of the offering's ability to bring networks into the cloud and offer customers a true Simple, Open, and Agile platform for innovation.
Bring ON the next era of networking!
Exploring the vision for the networking industry and the issues shaping its future.
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Macomb County commissioners are to discuss today their annual salaries, including whether to approve pay hikes with already-debated options ranging from a couple of thousand dollars to more than $4,200 for members who oversee full board committees.
During a meeting Monday, a few commissioners indicated they would like to keep the pay the same, but may favor raising the salary of the full-time board chairman. The board also is to discuss the county executives pay, which was not talked about Monday.
Commissioners have to approve a compensation ordinance for the board and the executive by April 22, the filing deadline for candidates running for those offices this year.
Any salary changes would be in place in 2015 and 2016 for commissioners, who serve two-year terms, and from 2015-18 for the executive, who is elected to a four-year term.
The part-time commissioners annual pay is $30,746. The board chairman makes $66,595 and the executive makes $139,773. Both are full-time positions.
Board Chairman David Flynn gave his colleagues several options for his pay and theirs, including maintaining the status quo. He encouraged them to give suggestions in what is often a delicate discussion for public officials.
Another of Flynns options was a pay bump to commensurate his and the commissioners pay with a $4,000 bonus county workers are to receive by the end of 2016. Union and nonunion employees got the bonus, spread over three years, but elected officials did not.
A third option he provided was restoring pay to peak 2006 levels of $34,068 for the board and $73,790 for the board chair.
A fourth option, just for commissioners, was a tiered salary approach for commissioners who chair committees. The tiered system would give board members who chair non-committee of the whole committees a $2,254 pay hike and those who chair committee of the whole committees a $4,254 pay bump.
Commissioner Veronica Klinefelt was opposed to the tiered system.
We dont work for each other or the county, we work for the residents in our district, she said.
Commissioner Kathy Vosburg, a former board chairwoman, said she would recommend a pay bump for the board chair to the $70,000 range, bringing the salary closer to that of a full-time elected official.
Commissioner Kathy Tocco said her recommendation would be to maintain the status quo.
In 2009, the board took a 5% pay cut. It took another 5% cut in 2011 to the current level. The board chairs salary also dropped.
There have been no raises or cuts to the salaries of other county elected officials since 2006, according to information in the boards packet. The executives salary started when the executive form of government began in 2011. That salary has not changed.
Macomb commissioners are paid less than commissioners in Oakland County, who make $33,782, and Wayne County, who make $61,808, according to material in their packet. It also contained information on salaries for Oakland and Wayne county executives, who earn $173,500 and $154,521, respectively, this year and salaries of executives in other large municipalities.
Contact Christina Hall: firstname.lastname@example.com


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Autosomal recessive chronic granulomatous disease caused by deletion at a dinucleotide repeat
Casimir, Colin M. and Bu-Ghanim, Hanan N. and Rodaway, Adam R and Bentley, David L. and Rowe, Peter and Segal, Anthony W. (1991) Autosomal recessive chronic granulomatous disease caused by deletion at a dinucleotide repeat. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 88 (7). pp. 2753-2757. ISSN 0027-8424
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Chronic granulomatous disease (CGD) is a rare inherited condition rendering neutrophils incapable of killing invading pathogens. This condition is due to the failure of a multicomponent microbicidal oxidase that normally yields a low-midpoint-potential b cytochrome (cytochrome b245). Although defects in the X chromosome-linked cytochrome account for the majority of CGD patients, as many as 30% of CGD cases are due to an autosomal recessive disease. Of these, greater than 90% have been shown to be defective in the synthesis of a 47-kDa cytosolic component of the oxidase. We demonstrate here in three unrelated cases of autosomal recessive CGD that the identical underlying molecular lesion is a dinucleotide deletion at a GTGT tandem repeat, corresponding to the acceptor site of the first intron-exon junction. Slippage of the DNA duplex at this site may contribute to the high frequency of defects in this gene.
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Two more sessions have been completed on my latest 12 square foot painting at Time Out New York's Headquarters. I have moved to a central alcove where I have more room, and fabulous plastic furniture to call my own. Yesterday, K'Naan set up in the lounge and performed a song, drawing a crowd of Time Out New Yorker's to watch, photo and record. Erin came by to check out the space, and I hit a groove on the canvas – focusing on refining and polishing from the bottom up.
Here is a shot at the end of Day 3, with a hazy city view in the background, and a blurry canvas in the foreground. Ah, depth of field – it's a sonofabitch. Stand by for continued progress on this picture, on Twitter.


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Oil tycoon turned wind and natural gas promoter T. Boone Pickens has decided to hold off on his plans for a massive wind power project in the Texas Panhandle, at least temporarily. What was to be the largest wind farm in the world has been shelved due to tight credit markets and low natural gas prices. According to Pickens' BP Capital Management spokesman Jay Rosser, interviewed by the Washington Post, "Boone still remains committed and focused on developing wind energy in the United States. The timing is not as aggressive as he originally outlined because of the collapse of the capital markets and because of the steep downturn of natural gas prices." (Many utilities are choosing natural gas to generate electricity).
The original plan, unveiled in 2007, was for a "4,000-megawatt wind farm — big enough to power 1.3 million homes — at a projected cost of $10 billion." His company, Mesa Power, has already "ordered 667 wind turbines from General Electric for the first of four project phases… and is now looking for other projects that could use the $2 billion worth of turbines," according to The Washington Post.
The shift to renewable energy will be slow and news such as this demonstrates how much of energy generation still relies on conventional energy sources like coal, oil, and natural gas. Especially in tough economic times, the cost factor will largely determine what resources are used. Continued innovation, government support for alternatives, and taxes (including non-transparent ones such as cap-and-trade) will eventually make alternative energy cost competitive. As the Pickens setback illustrates, however, that day is not quite here.


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Mike Spreckelmeier of Progressive Builders presents home remodeling workshops Feb 19 & Feb 28 at Bonita Bay to unveil the secrets to successful Florida home remodeling. Learn the 5 most common mistakes homeowners often make and how to avoid them.
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Our system has new features, such as the Workforce Registry, Job Board and the updated Core Competencies. Check them out on the left-hand menu.
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Andrea has been working in the film industry since 1986. Based in Munich, Germany, she has been involved in the development, financing, production, marketing and/or distribution of 8-10 international film productions per year. In 1994, Andrea moved to Los Angeles. Among her producing credits are SLC PUNK!, AVE MARIA, and BOOKIES. Since winter 2003, Andrea's main focus is the feature length documentary 1000 JOURNALS, which is her first film as director.
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Hansen Natural Corp
Positive Review
Stock Review
As with all growth stocks though, Hansen has come crashing back to earth. These are the times when these rocket growth stocks become attractive to value investors like us. Hansen won't come close to it's 5 year figures of 48% annual revenue growth and 92% operating earnings growth, but the latest quarter showed a company that is still growing. Let's look a bit closer.
Hansen Natural produces energy drinks, the most well known of which is the Monster Energy brand. The company's meteoric growth has been due to the expanding popularity of the energy drink segment, combined with the gradual roll out of Monster Energy across North America. Hansen has also done a good job consistently developing new products, a must in the cutthroat world of beverage sales. Some new products include niche energy brands like Lost, Joker Mad, Rumba, and coffee based drink Java Monster.
Hansen stock has some attractive qualities for investors. Contrary to noise on the Street, the company is still growing. Second quarter results showed 15% revenue growth and 32% earnings per share growth - solid numbers for a growth company, let alone a potential value based investment. Monster Energy continued to take market share from leader Red Bull. Distribution agreements with heavyweights Anheuser-Busch in the U.S., Pepsi in Canada, and Cadbury in Mexico ensure that Hansen's products get shelf space at convenience stores, and the company is rolling out product into the U.K. as well. The balance sheet is rock solid with 200 million in cash vs. no debt. Capital allocation has been outstanding, with a 97% trailing twelve month MFI return on capital figure, and a 5-year average over 140%, very lofty figures. Cash flow is also strong with a free cash flow margin hovering around 15%, although the cash conversion cycle is not that great (cash flow is routinely less than reported earnings due to inventory and A/R buildup). The current earnings yield of 10.4% is cheap relative to competitors and the market, although free cash flow yield is less impressive at 6.2%. In short, I feel that Hansen is a good company trading at a good price, and worthy of consideration for a Magic Formula Investing portfolio.
However, MagicDiligence stops just short of recommending Hansen as a Top Buy recommendation. It all comes back to the durability of high returns on capital. Hansen has done a great job over the past 5 years, but that was within the context of a strong market for energy drinks, few competitors, and a huge geographic canvas to expand upon. The landscape is changing in energy drinks. Now Hansen faces not just Red Bull, but heavyweights Pepsi (Amp, No Fear, Adrenaline Rush), Coca-Cola (Full Throttle, NOS) and Anheuser-Busch (180), as well as a litany of energy drink specialty brands (Rockstar, etc.). Competition brings prices down and makes shelf space more difficult to secure. It also forces higher spending on both advertising and new product development. All of this is deadly for profit margins.
There are also some other concerns. Prices for raw materials have been rising, pressuring gross margins. And consumer tastes can change with the winds. Energy drinks have been hot, and still are today, but are we looking at a fad or a durable product line? Time will tell. Lastly, with the U.S. conquered, Hansen must turn towards international markets which are more expensive and difficult to penetrate.
With great financial health and fat margins combined with continuing growth and a cheap stock price, Hansen is a good buy. Just realize the future is a lot more cloudy then the recent sunny past.
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Steve does not own HANS.
Joel Greenblatt and MagicFormulaInvesting.com are not associated in any way with this website. Neither Mr. Greenblatt or MagicFormulaInvesting.com endorse this website's investment opinions, strategy, or products. Investment recommendations on this website are not chosen by Mr. Greenblatt, nor are they based on Mr. Greenblatt's proprietary investment model, and are not chosen by MagicFormulaInvesting.com. Magic Formula® is a registered trademark of MagicFormulaInvesting.com, which has no connection to this website. The information on this website is for informational purposes only and solely represents the views and opinions of the author. No warranty is provided or implied as to the accuracy, completeness, or timeliness of this information. This information may not be construed as investment advice of any kind, nor can it be relied upon as the basis for stock trades. Alexander Online Properties LLC, the proprietor of this website, is not responsible in any way for losses or damages resulting from the use of this information. Alexander Online Properties LLC is not a registered investment advisor. All logos are trademarked properties of their respective companies.
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Political relations/B_descRubAff1>
Ten years after the catastrophic plane crash in eastern Venezuela that left 162 dead, including 151 of our compatriots from Martinique, we join those who are paying tribute to the victims of that tragedy.» Read more ...
France and Venezuela maintain regular political relations. Venezuela's participation in the search for a solution to the issue of hostages in Colombia has generated an even greater level of bilateral dialogue.
Accordingly, President Chavez has travelled to Paris twice since 2007 (November 2007 and September 2008); ten agreements were signed during the second high level meeting between France and Venezuela in October 2008 and two trips were made by French ministerial authorities to Venezuela in 2009 (Anne-Marie Idrac, Secretary of State for Foreign Trade, in late March, and Eric Woerth, Minister for the Budget, Public Accounts and the Civil Service, in late April). A third high-level meeting should take place in Caracas in 2011, which will be an opportunity to strengthen our cooperation in many areas (energy, education, and the environment, etc.)
Updated on : 01.08.12


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135 Bedford Street Stamford, CT 06901
Enjoy 1/2 Price GRANDE MARGARITAS from 7pm to close
Enjoy $3 Tacos & $3 Dos Equis Drafts from 7pm to close
Enjoy 1/2 Price Pitchers of Sangria from 7pm to close
Ladies enjoy $5 Drinks from 7pm to close
Enjoy $3 Beers, $4 Sangria, & $5 Margaritas
Monday to Friday 4pm to 7pm
Celebrate your 30th Birthday at Lola's
Two Hour Premium Open Bar & hors d'oeuvres
$30 per Person
Lola's Mexican Kitchen is the go-to source for Mexican food in Fairfield County. In addition to a successful location in White Plains, we are also proud to bring our authentic Mexican cuisine to the people of CT. The location makes us on of the most convenient bars in Noroton, CT, and Lola's is also a favorite for residents of Greenwich, Rowayton, Cos Cob, and Darien.
Located in the middle of restaurant-laden downtown Stamford, just down the road from Noroton and Rowayton, Lola's stands out from the crowd with a rustic atmosphere and innovative menu. The establishment's deep brownish red brick and hardwood walls coupled with subtle mood lighting create a soothing ambience perfect for any occasion. Lola's Mexican Kitchen is unique in its versatility, serving authentic Mexican food in CT with a modern flare while also providing a venue for birthday parties and corporate events in Stamford. Reservations can be made over the phone or through the website. Bigger parties will be given large private areas where attentive party staff will bring out specialty cocktails, cake, and, of course, any of Lola's finest Mexican food options. Come out from Greenwich, Rowayton, Cos Cob, Darien, Noroton, or anywhere in Fairfield County for fabulous corporate events and birthdays parties in Stamford.
Lola's offers one of the most extensive Mexican food menus in CT with traditional favorites as well as house specialties like Pablo's Chicken, Carne Asada, and Shrimp Ajillo. Freshly made tacos feature steak, fish, carnitas, chicken, brisket, and vegetarian options.
We have something for everyone during weekly specials and daily happy hour, when we offer up unbeatable prices on your favorite Mexican – and American – drinks and food. Our corporate friends coming from Greenwich or Stamford will love relaxing at the bar after work with a wide ranging selection of domestic and imported drafts and bottles. Suburbanites from Rowayton, Darien, Cos Cob, and Noroton will appreciate the relaxed, family-friendly Fairfield County environment. Come in every Friday for the $5 bar menu featuring Lola's unusual but delectable bar fare including popcorn shrimp & calamari or chipotle guacamole with warm, crispy homemade tortilla chips.
Celebrate holidays and events with us for a fun time and out of this world specials. Whether it's Christmas, Valentine's Day, St. Paddy's Day, March Madness, or National Margarita Day, Lola's Mexican Kitchen specializes in making the festivities memorable for all of Fairfield County. You won't find these prices in Greenwich, and small towns like Noroton, Darien, and Cos Cob will never provide such a selection. Come to Lola's Mexican Kitchen in Stamford's happening downtown district for the best Mexican food in CT.


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Welcome to the Healthy Communities Healthy Youth Website
"The measure of the health of a society is how well it takes care of its youngest generation." Peter L. Benson
The Healthy Communities Healthy Youth (HCHY) committee is one of the first subcommittees of the Waushara Prevention Council. The focus of the committee throughout the years has been to help youth make healthy decisions, especially around the use of alcohol, tobacco, marijuana, prescription medication and other drugs.
There are many ways that a community can help youth achieve success in life. One way is by helping youth develop the 40 Developmental Assets that they need in order to succeed. You can find out more about the assets needed and ideas for building them by clicking on Related Links in the side bar and going to the Search Institute web site.
HCHY does have limited funding for alcohol and drug free activities for youth and families to participate in. Click on the Request Funding to find out how to get funds.
Interested in getting more information? Clink on the other items listed in the side bar.
To get involved with the committee, see the contact information below to the left.


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Dave and Adam's will not have phone hours on Friday, November 27th in observance of Thanksgiving.
Normal customer service hours will resume Monday, November 30th
2004 Upper Deck SP Game Used Edition Authentic Fabric #AFRG Rex Grossman
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Poor construction blamed after gym's collapseComment on this story
Seoul -
South Korean police on Friday blamed shoddy construction for the collapse of a student-packed gymnasium that killed 10 people, and said they expected to file criminal charges.
The roof of the gym, at a resort complex near the southern city of Gyeongju, caved in under the weight of heavy snow on February 17 when about 560 college were attending a concert.
Ten people were killed and more than 120 injured.
Following an initial investigation, senior police investigator Bae Bong-Gil said evidence had been found of structural flaws and lax management controls.
Not enough bolts were used to hold together an auxiliary pillar and the roof, while some materials failed to meet government standards.
"Resort operators also did not remove snow from the roof," Bae said, adding the gymnasium was used as an auditorium without approval.
Police were continuing to gather evidence with a view to eventual criminal prosecution, he said.
The building was part of a sprawling mountain resort complex that had experienced unusually heavy snowfall in the preceding week.
It was a pre-engineered building, assembled with rigid frames and side walls - of a type normally used for warehouses and aviation hangars.
Some parents of the victims have accused the organisers of what was a student orientation event of failing to ensure the students' safety.
The resort owner, Kolon business group, has promised full compensation.
Gyeongju is a popular tourism spot for Korean and international travellers. Once the capital of the Silla kingdom, it boasts numerous historical sites and is located at the southern fringe of the Taebaek mountains. - Sapa-AFP
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text: "I very rarely feel connected to characters in video games, or if I am, generally it's only at the surface level. I can count on my hand the number of times a game's narrative has drawn me in – specifically to its characters – and made me experience genuine emotions for them. Persona 4 is probably the title to best describe a game like this. It pulls me into a world not so different from my own. It gives me characters I can relate to, laugh at, protect, and even love."


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The MSR site says: Minimum Weight2 lbs 9 oz / 1160 g. I think that means the fly, tent body and poles and does not include the pegs, tie cords or sacks, etc.Does anyone know the weight of all of the above plus the practical items as cord, sacks, pegs?? How much does the Hubba HP rig weigh that you carry???? How close is it to 3 pounds???Thanks, Thomas
Edited by ftm1776 on 12/06/2010 16:23:05 MST.
MSR lists the packaged weight at exactly 3 pounds. I haven't weighed one to verify.
Thanks Brad,I think the "packaged" weight even includes the box and packing materials and everything inside when shipped.So that would put the tent trail pack weight at something less than 3 pounds. Yes?????Has anyone weighed their own Hubbba HP as carried??It seems to me that the Hubba HP would weigh a little less than a Big Agnes Cooper Spur UL1. I weighed a UL1 from the factory, including the tent body, fly, pegs, poles at just a smidgen below 3 pounds......maybe 2.95 pounds, as I recall.
I can't tell you the weight of the Hubba HP but I reviewed the Hubba Hubba HP and am writing up the Carbon Fiber 3 right now. The packaged weight is the weight of everything that comes with the tent, including guylines, owners manual, etc. It does not include "packaging".The minimum weight is just the body, fly and poles. Since it has to have at least three stakes (two at the back corners and one at the vestibule) I would add that weight to the BPL Trail weight.The CF3 actually came in under the listed weight. Kudos to MSR for that.
The packaged weight is generally the other stuff you mentioned... guylines, stakes, stuff sacks, etc. There's no box or packing materials for tents such as the Hubba.I usually find that adding ~4 ounces to the minimum weight gets me roughly to actual trail weight. That assumes light stakes & light guylines, but not using the stuff sacks (well, sometimes the stake one), & not carrying pole splints/etc.The minimum weights of the two tents in question are 2 ounces different, w/the MSR listing as lighter... so yeah, it's probably going to weigh a hair under 3 pounds...
Sorry Mr.Mica - just looked at my e-mails and saw the PM. I can reply here.The Hubba HP weighed exactly 3lbs with the tags attached in packed form with all stuff sacks, pole repair sleeve, instructions (attached to the stuff sack), pegs, and additional guyline. The tent weighed exactly 2lbs, 9oz with poles, inner tent body, and fly. That was without pegs. So I would think the trail weight with lighter pegs would be 2lbs 11oz.
My 2010 Hubba HP weighs three pound and 1/4 ounce with two extra ti stakes and two extra guy lines.
Edited by Piddler on 12/08/2010 08:29:13 MST.
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Brian Keene's Dark Hollow Film ComingMeh
Brian Keenes Dark Hollow feature film is going into production and will begin filming in summer of 2010.
"After two miscarriages, writer Adam Shay's marriage is on the rocks. On a walk through local woods rumored to be haunted, Adam come across a strange sight: a statue of a half-man, half-goat creature, a satyr from ancient legends, that comes to life before his eyes. Soon, all the women in town begin disappearing, summoned to the woods by the satyr's hypnotic piping. When Adam gathers the menfolk to hunt down the satyr and save the women, what they uncover is an unholy evil bent on protecting itself and spreading its seed..."
Paul Campion an award winning short filmmaker and former visual effects artist on film such as Lord of the Rings and the Chronicles of Narnia, will direct from a script by writer Paul Finch Finch with Elisabeth Pinto (Eel Girl, Rare Books and Manuscripts) producing. Shane Rangi (Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings ) attached to play the role of the evil satyr Hylinus, with Andrea Clarke (Dog Soldiers) attached as Casting Director.
Filming will take place in Bromley & Kent, England, with Richard Bluck (Black Sheep, Lord of the Rings) attached as Director of Photography.


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Powers Distributing is hosting a contest to win two tickets to the Emagine Theater to see Anchorman 2, in theaters on Dec. 20.
Just visit powersdistributing.com/content/enter-win-anchorman-2-tickets, submit your name and address and answer a couple questions about Ron Burgundy. You must be 21 or older to enter.
This is part of the Orion Township company's Miller Lite promotion — coming in January in its original packaging.
Robert Vedder, certified cicerone at Powers Distributing, offers this recipe of Miller Lite Glaze:
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 1 tablespoon flour
• 1 teaspoon dry mustard
• 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
• Add Miller Lite and stir all to make a smooth paste
• Apply to pre-cooked meat and cook for additional time until well glazed.
Miller Lite has only 96 calories and 3.2 grams of carbohydrates, which will leave plenty of extra calories to enjoy some gravy on mashed potatoes or pie.


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DOSWELL, Va. (AP) — The Civil War Trust is in the stretch run to complete a $3.1 million national fundraising campaign to preserve 665 acres from the May 1864 battle of North Anna.
The trust says the objective of the campaign is to capture the entire combat area of Jericho Mill, which includes the ruins of the mill and land on both banks of the North Anna River. Part of the Battle of North Anna, more than 1,000 casualties occurred at Jericho.
Historian Douglas Southall Freeman has called the site as one of the most picturesque battlegrounds in Virginia.
The trust said it is using an array of matching grants to complete the purchase. The trust has an Aug. 13 deadline to close on the property.
The final phase of the campaign totals $314,000.
Copyright 2014 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
A look at the winter weather news in the D.C. area.
For a trip to the North Pole, there's no finer way to travel. Railroads around the country offer seasonal trips to see Santa between Thanksgiving and Christmas.


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A recent article in the magazine The American Prospect argues that there are a surprising number of unknowns in partisan public policy debates; things like:
- how many jobs have gone offshore
- what kinds of jobs are created by public investments
- the actual number of foreclosures and evictions
- which early-education programs work
- who is funding outside spending on political campaigns
- how much students actually learn in college.
(In this case, I'd argue that it's more important WHAT students learn than "how much" they learn).
Anyway, as the article argues,
Information is the life-blood of public policy. Identifying a problem is the first step to solving it, and once a solution is in place, we need metrics to understand if the policy is working and how to turn its weaknesses into strengths. Though the data we have today are, unsurprisingly, better than ever, there are still too many dark spots and missing data on a host of important issues. Take, for example, the financial sector. Bank regulators, lacking a clear picture of how predatory mortgage loans are connected to global capital flows, allowed an exuberant bubble to spin into a crash in 2008. It's a reminder that if we can identify gaps in our knowledge, we would be remiss not to close them.
This debate isn't just about how to collect new data but also how to interpret the data we already have. A perennial question is how to define poverty; the current measure is pegged to the economy of the 1960s and doesn't reflect today's family finances. A new measure developed by the Commerce Department will paint a more accurate picture of poverty, but it is opposed by conservatives who fear that the results will portray more penury in the United States — "propaganda," scoffs the Heritage Foundation. Sometimes, people just don't want to know.
Ignorance, however, is only bliss if you think the government shouldn't play an active role in society; bureaucratic inertia favors conservatives. Though new technology has made sharing and manipulating data easier, the government is playing catch-up in putting information online so the public and academics can put it to good use. In many policy areas, the government isn't just failing at transparency but also usability — data sets don't always lend themselves to apples-to-apples comparisons, making much-needed analysis more difficult to obtain.
Can you name any other instances of what Donald Rumsfeld famously called "known unknowns'?


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Kirsten Sebold is the winner of the Nook tablet.
- Filed Under
The Auburndale community was buzzing with excitement as names were drawn to see who would win each of the 33 baskets donated by local businesses, youth groups and families. The raffle raised $2,459.
The basket raffle was part of a two-year long initiative to raise money to replace the elementary gym floor. With the money from this fundraiser, the total is just more than $52,000 - very ...


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Quality Salvage Yard
If you are considering getting rid of your car, then there is no better place to sell your unwanted vehicle to than Used Car Parts Detroit in Detroit. Our simple, straightforward process will provide you with a quick, hassle-free experience.
Why spend the time and hassle of searching for a suitable buyer who is willing to accept your old auto when we can quickly take it off of your hands?
Find the Parts You Need
As a leader in used car parts, we are proud to offer the largest selection of salvage cars that are sure to meet your needs. With a fully stocked warehouse of used and rebuilt parts to choose from in the Detroit area, we are confident that we will have the exact part needed for nearly any vehicle make or model.
There is also a 45-day standard warranty on most parts to ensure that you are completely satisfied. We know that you will agree we are the top salvage yard in the area.


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November 30, 2015 - 12:00 GMT
Warplanes targeted residential neighborhoods in Sa'ada and Taiz.
November 29, 2015 - 11:30 GMT
Airstrikes and skirmishes in Yemen on Sunday have killed civilians in multiple provinces.
November 29, 2015 - 09:01 GMT
A skirmish on the Yemeni-Saudi border Saturday night caused artillery to strike inside Saudi, killing one.
November 27, 2015 - 18:00 GMT
Human Rights watch criticized Saudi Arabia for indiscriminately targeting civilians during airstrikes in Yemen.
November 26, 2015 - 13:00 GMT
Airstrikes were carried out in the northern Saada province, targeting the city of Baqam.
November 26, 2015 - 08:02 GMT
UN aid trucks are not being allowed into Taiz, where over 200,000 civilians require desperate emergency assistance.
November 24, 2015 - 15:50 GMT
Nasser Hassan Mohammed Al Balooshi was wounded during the the fight for the city of Marib.
November 24, 2015 - 10:00 GMT
Somali militant group al-Shabaab is facing difficulty with factions defecting to Daesh.
November 24, 2015 - 07:00 GMT
At least 15 people were killed by Saudi airstrikes around Yemen after the kingdom launched a series of attacks against Houthi militants.
November 23, 2015 - 22:55 GMT
Everyone's talking about Syria and Iraq, but much less discussed is the war in Yemen and the number of countries actually involved.
November 22, 2015 - 13:06 GMT
Houthi forces planted banned anti-personnel land mines in Taez to slow the advancement of pro-Hadi forces.
November 21, 2015 - 12:14 GMT
Daesh claimed responsibility for attacks on the army in southeast Yemen Friday, after the military had blamed Al-Qaeda for the assaults that cost dozens of lives.
November 19, 2015 - 14:00 GMT
A Yemeni official said the three had been detained by Houthi-run security forces.
November 19, 2015 - 08:22 GMT
The battle between Houthis and government forces to control Taiz will be the focal point of peace talks in Yemen. Here is why.
November 19, 2015 - 07:00 GMT
Iran's FM met with the UN special envoy to Yemen to discuss intervening in the ongoing conflict.