text:
Trying to be good sons (but not having a clue how)
I'm going to try to keep this story short, (because the internet only allows short attention spans). But the multiple dimensions of this story are rich with texture. But I'll keep it brief, and continue the explanations into the photo captions.
Our mother is aging. She is now 82. Almost deaf. And now with early dementia, she also is smoking like a fiend. I have no idea how smoking and dementia are connected, but they seem to be. My brother Robert and I are rallying together to support my mother, as she wishes to continue to live at home. She's always been "an outside person, with her flowers", so the thought of assisted living is the last possible bad option. She needs almost daily help now. We can't get her in the shower; she won't cook a solid healthy meal; we've taken her car keys away; she's basically turned into a Country Western song — drinking coffee, and smoking cigarettes, (and watching The Weather Channel).
A few weeks ago we finally arranged a suitable caregiver to come to her home four days per week. We tried a few individuals, but they all flaked out, so we ended up with a company that sends caregivers out. Of course we were nervous about who would actually show up. As it turns out, we were blessed with an angel.
Rose is her caregiver now three of the four days per week. She is incredible. She is a trained teacher for developmentally challenged children, with a Masters Degree, and my fear is that we'll lose her when the school year begins. But for now, we have her and we aren't letting go. The other day, Rose showed up with corn from the garden, and various vegetables and chicken, and she cooked my mother a birthday lunch. As we sat around the table eating, I began to compare notes with Rose — as it turns out, she is the little sister of Paul Cole, who was my friend at T.C. Cherry Elementary School, in the mid sixties. Paul was also friends with Vince Rowe, who I have not talked to in years. Vince and I were the fastest runners in our grade — we'd run from the left field foul pole to the right field pole, and always be neck and neck.
Rose told me a story of even remembering that her kindergarten class, at her church, was segregated. This must have been about 1966 or so. Amazing to think about — our generation being segregated. Rose and Paul lived on Smallhouse Road; there were nine in her family. Paul graduated and went to the Navy, and is retired, living in Hawaii. I saw him a few years ago at our reunion.
Small world…
So anyway, today Rose and my mother and I cleaned out her kitchen cabinets, moved things to the garage, watered the plants, and fetched the mail. My brother is great too, always comes by to check on her often. He's great with keeping the house running smoothly; he completely fixed her broken air conditioner last week, almost effortlessly.
I wish there was an Instruction Manual on how to properly support a parent, when these decisions need to be made. My brother and I just text back and forth, trying to figure it out, a day at a time, doing the best we can.
61 Responses
I forget how much I love your blog. I haven't been on here in so long!
For some reason this post got me all emotional, possibly because I am a woman-lol, but also because I just finished work experience at a dementia unit as I am training to become a nurse. I know how difficult it is to find caregivers who are worthy of looking after a parent or grandparent and by the looks you truly have been blessed, rose seems like such a loving lady. Thank you for the glimps into your life, sometimes I really need to step back and realize that I'm not the only one out here!
Yor blog is inspirational, love your photography so much!!!
All the way from New Zealand!
This is the first time that I have ever commented on someone's blog, but this post hit so close to home. First off, I love you photography. I am also a photographer, working in advertising and fine art. My mother is 84 and going down hill fast. She also is going deaf, and starting to go blind. She has the onsets of dementia and her body is starting to fail and 3 months ago I decided she needed to move in with me and my family. Every day we go thru the same things that you are mentioning in your post, so I can relate to what you are going thru. I'm cooking breakfast, lunch and dinner for her and the funny coincidence is that I to am also on a juice fast and she is always trying to get me to eat her food as well.
All the best to you and your mom.
Michael Regnier
simply wonderful.
Going through a very similar scenario. We moved next door to be at hand and I spend about an hour a day helping out. Same symptoms: closed blinds, avoiding personal tasks or any kind of exercise, constant TV, coffee, poor dietary habits. In a young person it would raise warning flags about serious depression, but his mood seems fine– just no motivation to do anything and doesn't seem to care about consequences and nobody can seem to change that. I enjoy spending time with him but I try to keep good boundaries on my time, or he might be inclined to take all of it. It's a trade-off. I know if I was in the reversed position I'd want my kids to care enough to be around at least some of the time, but it can be very hard when you have a career and possibly a family of your own. Your caregiver sounds like a real Angel. I'm sure you'll do whatever you can to hold on to her. I know my dad doesn't want to be a burden to me, but like anybody he needs some love and attention. There are times when I wish he had a wife, or more friends or family around but it is what it is. Thankfully I have some support of my own ( my partner ) or it would be harder. Take care and hang in there, and try to stay on the bright side getting to spend time with them before they're gone.
What a wonderful tribute to your beloved mother! I can relate as I lost my mother in 2003, and my grandmother, who reared me, in 2001. My mother lived her life in a nursing home for thirty years, beginning when she was merely 37. She had been diagnosed with undifferentiated schizophrenia; nowadays, there is speculation that she suffered from bipolar with schiz-affect. In contrast, my grandmother worked at the bakery and drove her car through her 87th year. She lived in her house on Scottsville Road from 1950-1996. She started having strokes, so she moved into an apartment in Christian Care Homes on Westen Avenue which has assisted living. After a major stroke in 2001, she was moved to the nursing home wing of Christian Care where she lived for about six months until she passed away. My great-grandmother, who helped rear me and who passed away in 1971 to the date of my grandmother's passing, stayed in a nursing home for about six months, before my grandparents moved her back to our home where she has a full-time sitter until she died. You are blessed to be able to keep your mother in her home, and your sitter sounds like an angel. It is heartbreaking to see our loved ones age. as I said, I have dealt with this with my entire life with my own mother. She was in the mental hospital all through my childhood. I will pray that your mother can stay in her own home for as long as possible. My great-grandmother was injured during her nursing home stay; my grandmother found her with black eyes and tied to a chair. My mother had questionable care at times as well. My grandmother lay in her apartment on the kitchen floor until my uncle found her, and he questioned the staff why they had not answered her calls for help, for their was a help cord that she had pulled to alert them that she had fallen. Then, she had jewelry and silver stolen from her apartment after she had been moved to the nursing home wing; the thief or someone had left religious pamphlets all over her apartment. People even stole clothes from her room in the nursing home wing. A sitter who worked there told me that there were many thefts at Christian Care Homes. A friend of mine hired someone from out of state to watch over her father's care while he was in a nursing home to make sure that he got proper care. Your precious mother and your family will be in my prayers as you make important decisions about your mother. God bless her angelic sitter; she is truly a gift from God!
Wow, wow, wow.
Where do I start, Mark?
I've been reading your blog for a long time now and this is one of those posts that just gets me in the head and the heart.
I remember your Mother from the "okra" (?) videos. LOVED THAT. (I even encouraged a friend of mine to get her own aging mother on film making a (famously delicious) family meal because of your Mom's touching video.)
I also remember reading here on your blog about your Mom giving the neighborhood girl a cookie every day or so.
So to see this turn of events…I feel for you in Washington, D.C. Just want you to know that.
The part you wrote about the "ritual" of her waving you off from the front of the house is exactly what I went through before my father died. He would stand in the doorway and wave and wave until he couldn't see me anymore down the street. I would toot the horn and he'd wave harder, smiling. I would think the same thing: "Will this be the last time I see him?" (It was, once. But at least I saw him standing in front of his own home that he loved–gardens and fruit trees included over the years–smiling and waving and sending me off safely with his good thoughts and well wishes.
Your post hit me today.
Thank you for the beauty of your photos coupled with your stories.
[…] how to care for aging parents while keeping your sanity « The JOurney by Mary Oliver Jul 18 […]
Hi love your blog….I am a personal support worker who works on the dementia floor…very rewarding but demanding job…but would not give it up for anything…hope she can stay in the home for as long as possible..and I give praise to your family..
Thanks for sharing. My Mum is in the later stages and I miss her so much. Dad passed away at 66 with early onset. I consider myself blessed to have such amazing parents.
Thank you so much for your post! My Dad has Alzheimer's and he is in a home. I just wanted to commend you for keeping up with your mom. I have 3 brothers, and some days it feels like they don't care. One brother hasn't seen Dad in Months. And he lives a block from the home. I find it harder dealing with the lack of empathy from the brothers then taking care of our father. So, as a daughter, mother and hopefully eventually a grand mother, and quite possibly a future Alzheimer patient, I want to thank you for caring for your mother. And for keeping in contact with your brother regarding her and her health!.
Thank-you,my mom had this dreadful disese and we lost her 5 yrs ago,this brought back so many memories for me,all I can say is keep loving your mom.
I lost my mom to AD and now my older brother that is like a father to me is struggling with it.Thanks for the encouraging post.
What a beautiful story. Your Mother is so lucky to have you and your Brother. I worked in an independant Retirement community, and we had alot of residents there whom had ahlzheimers or dimetia, and some who's family just paid the bills and went on with their own lives. God Bless you two or three with Rose. I love elderley people and to sit and visit with them and hear their stories is so interesting. Even those with memory problems can usually remember something about the past that was so special to them. My Father passed away in Nov. 2011 and strokes caused some of his memory problems. Hang in their, the Lord has blessings for children like you, I truely believe this.
This was absolutely beautiful. I recently lost my grandmother to this dreadful disease, after years of helping my parents care for her. Your pictures and writing really resonated with me and reminded me of the conflicting emotions each day brought. I wish you and your family the best of luck and am sending hope and love your way. I know the decisions you are having to make are difficult and it's hard to not second-guess yourself, but it sounds like you are being a wonderful son and doing a great job for your mother. It reflects on how well she must have raised you and your brother for you two to be such devoted, loving sons in her time of need.
This has really hit close to home. Your last picture made me cry. I lost may grandma 12/5/2009 and my grandpa 6/28/2012. I loved them dearly they were more then just grandparents to my sisters and I. When we would arrive my grandma would cry. When we left her and grandpa would stand at the drive. Grandma holding a tissue and crying. My grandpa holding her and both waving good bye. I miss them sooo much. My grandpa almost made it to his 90th birthday. really long story but short of it he passed out and broke his femur. It required surgery. Everything went fine. They were preparing to send him home. 2 hours I receive a phone call he was gone. One good thing is we saw him 5 days prior to his passing. Grandma I was there with her. I think it is wonderful what you and your brother is doing and having a great caregiver is even better. Love the pictures also I am just taking up photography. So I am draw to pictures now lol. My God be with you all.
I am now dealing with my mother and have Dementia and struggling doing it alone as my sibblings choose to ignore my plea for help.
Mark, your blog has touched me so much. Your mother is so lucky to have your and brother. I lost my mother to pneumonia and before any signs of dementia. I am 66 and unfortunately I believe I am displaying some early signs. I will follow your journey and learn from you, your mom and the excellent care-giver with a great smile. Bless you!
What a wonderful son!!!!! I don't know what the hell I'm doing n i know I'm doing everything wrong lol.. I have two brothers that keep there distance…
Your story really hit close to home. My grandmother Betty has Alzhemier's and it is so hard to see her diminish. She loved her yard and garden butnow she doesnt even go outside. She hardly remembers me. She looks at me with blank eyes until I make her laugh. She is in a childlike stage now and loves to play. It is very hard to give her a shower also and she cries when the water hits her body. I have to do something funny like stick my head in or pretends she wets me. Then she laughs. The caregivers are ok.. But only does the minimum . There are days I go over there and both grandparents smell like urine. We been through so many caregivers. Its exhausting. We had a really great gal one time. But she ended up pregnant and had to leave us.. I miss her. She was awsome to my grandparents. Ask Rose if they can clone her and send her to Colorado!! J/k. Well best of luck to you and thank you for sharing your story.
thank you for sharing your journey Mark. prayers for you all as you continue on…
never knowing exactly what the next turn will bring…
may God send you blessings along the way
you are doing it "right", i promise….i have been a dementia care nurse is Assisted Living for many years, my last stint was in a locked alzheimers unit…my own sweet mother passed away last Valentines day after a few years of various situations including staying with me, my sis, in three different assited livings..if i had it to do again, i would have never moved her out of her home…your photos of your mother are like looking at my own life a few years ago…my mom would stand on her little porch waving me down the street…her pack of smokes and coffee cup were the two constants in her life before she was forced to move away from the house and plants she loved. Keep her at home for as long as you can..as a person who has worked in facilities, they are lacking in trained, compassionate one on one care…all of them…no matter how well staffed you think they are, when the day crew goes home and visitors are all gone, residents are low on the priority list with some of the "care givers" these places hire..i know….i had to supervise staff that i would have never trusted to care for my own parent..and more training is useless …you can not teach a person to have compassion…they either do or they dont…at least in a home setting you can be fully aware of what is going on 24/7 with your mother…i left my last job after continual reporting to my director …reports to her of staff who were disrespectful to residents, they would not fire the staff or reprimand them out of fear of law suits…me, an old-school type of nurse, must have not understood the new corporate politically correct policy of keeping people on the pay roll out of fear of law suits…for sure…there are many, many loving and kind people who work in facilities, ..but it only takes one cold hearted person to make a dementia patient fearful. i have seen this and it is heart-wrenching. keep your sweet mother at home…and install nanny cams if you can…God Bless.
i was so glad you posted this it is beautifull my mother has the samething i had to put my mother in a place where she could get the help she needs an my family does not help me with her i feel guilt all the time she is taken care of so gld i am not alone your mother is beautifull
Thanks for sharing, I lost my mom almost 4 years ago, its so hard to sit and watch them go from us, I kept her at home with me for the last 2 1/2 years she lived, it was like loosing her daily, sometimes my daughter would tell me "mama" banny is not home, she would look at us and seems like she was looking t hru us, but I would not take anything for being able to care for her until the end. And the bath thing, I think goes with all dementia patients, don't like water.
Thanks again for sharing brought back so many good memories of my mom.
Wow, your Mom is blessed to have 2 sons who care so much about her. You are not doing a good job, you are both doing a great job! I am walking this journey with my Mom now, we had to put her in care a few years ago (she is 92 now), and I am her family caregiver. Probably one of the toughest assignments in life is watching an aging parent failing. Many wonderful funny moments, but many very difficult trying times too. Like an emotional roller coaster. Stay strong and loving, so many people age with no one to care for them, no family to visit or help, alone and lonely. Bless you for what you are doing. You are doing it right. Thank you for sharing.
My mom had AD too. Horrible disease. She hated to bath too. We remembered that as a young girl she would have her hair washed in the kitchen sink. So she would let us wash her hair that way. As for bathing if we got a bath once a week we were glad. I removed the toilet paper in her room and put in flushable wipes that way her butt was cleaned! She would wash her face when she got ready for bed that was also a childhood routine. We realized that she didn't need a bath everyday she really wasn't doing much! So if we got her butt clean and her face washed we were ahead of the curve!
When we did want to bath her we told her it was Sat night and it was bath night! It worked sometimes!
Good luck and remember to take care of yourself!!
In the end all she knows is that she is being cared for with love.It sounds as if you are doing your best.There is no play book or way to predict how things will go for your family.My prayer for you is that your family gets through this whole. Certainly one of the hardest things you will EVER do but experience tells me you would gladly do it all over again.
Such a touching story! I have been a caregiver for 19 years now and its a blessing to see that Rose is now part of your family, your very lucky to have such a special person! I have had many patients through the years (but my most special one is my grandmother whom im currently caring for .( My parents moved in with her so that she could continue to be at home)i have always tried to put understand what my other families was dealing with but till now i have never truly understood! Prayer are with your family and may yall continue to be blessed with a wonderful caregiver to help yall through the months and years to come!!
You ARE being good sons. Don't ever doubt it! No one is equipped to handle this disease and yet millions do it everyday to care for the people they love. Bravo for what you and your brother are doing. My grandma, my "mom" passed from AD and watching her suffer was unbearable for me, and lets just say that I didn't handle it as I wish now I would have . After we lost her, I started working with AD patients myself to try and help other families get through it and I just wanted to let you that the bathing seems to affect most all the patients I've seen, and my grandma. I read a journal once that said these patients have a marked fear of water, probably from lack of understanding it. The suggestions of baby wipes and things work wonders. Keep your head up and now that she sees what you are doing for her, even if she can't express it. God Bless!!
You and your brother are working together to keep your Mom in her familiar place and I hope you can continue this as "The Long Goodbye" plays out. Keep up the good work!
My siblings & I are at that stage now. Mom fell in March & fractured her hip….hospital for a month then home where my sister lives with her. My sister took off some time from work to care for her & I went back for 2 weeks….I live in Philly, mom lives in Pittsburgh. When my sister returned to work, she made mom lunch & put it in the fridge. For whatever reason, mom didn't eat lunch, lost weight, became weak & lighted headed. Wound up back in the hospital, then onto a rehabilatation center (very nice too). Now the insurance says she's run out of coverage, the doctor feels she's not well enough to leave. My sister lost her job (after 29 years), no health insurance, no Rx coverage. They were discussing assisted living, not sure if they meant long term or short term, but if it's for good, the house will have to be sold, my sister wil have no place to live, no job, only severance & unemployment….neither good enough to survive. Both myself (retired) my older brother, on partial social security or my youngest brother, 3 children, are not financially able to do too much. I'm beside myself with worry for mom & my sister. This is the time I wish I was richer & living closer (moving back is not an option). I just hope that God steps in & helps out. I've suggested meals on wheels, but for whatever reason, my sister has let it go in one ear & right the other.Eventually she'll have to find a job, then what. Maybe I'll suggest her finding someone like Rose…..maybe she'll listen to me then
God bless the both of you boys and Rose. My mother passed away at 61 of Altzeimers! (I was only 24). She had it for about 4 years and they were hard ones. Luckily after 2 years she forgot she smoked (after smoking since about 10) but had other issues. She also would not take a shower and when you mentioned it she would get upset! But I wish Ihad been older and had more resources to help deal with it and that is my one regret. (it has been 21 years since she is gone). It was hardest once she forgot who I was. Its a hard and sad disease and my greatest fear is getting as it runs in the family. (her father, and older sister had it). We hope deep down they are still there and know we love them!
Excellent material..I volunteer in a alzthemers home Finding the disease extremely interesting and find myself drawn to learn about the disease. I love to hear different aproaches on how you deal with different situations..also would love to learn the early signs of alzthemers, latley I learned the sence of smell leaves the person early in the disease. The smoking mentioned. .. is interesting Does the person increase smoking, or start up when never smoked before? The water is interesting too..has your loved one always not liked water, could they swim in earlier times..like was the water fear always there? thanks for this keep in touch I d love to learn all I can..fill me in on early signs, and helpful hints.. hugs to all!
My Mom has Alzheimer's and I know it is very hard to watch her window to the world get smaller and smaller. As time goes on they seem to get mentally younger and younger. I to have a very hard time getting my mom onthe bathtub. I find it helps to not ask my mom but tell her it is time for her bath and as she is saying no I just gently ask her if she wants help with her buttons etc and it distracts her enough that she moves forward. I talk to her about what she wants to do when she is done and before she knows it she is done! I don't know how well it will work down the road though. Each day presents new challenges . God be with you and anyone that is caring for someone with any type of Dimentia. Being there for our loved ones in there world is all we can do. I do volunteer work with Hospice and I really believe that family being there makes all the difference in the world. There may come a time when you and I will need the help outside the home. When and if that time comes don't feel guilty, we all need some help sooner or later.
I jest tea your blog, how precious and sad. I just lost my Daddy 1 week ago. We went through alot of the similar issues with h. Not the weather channel, but his "Jesus" tape. He smoked 3-4 packs a day until 2 weeks before he passed and then wr told h he didnt smoke… Luckily, he said "oh, that's right". Dementia is an evil disease and hard to deal with. You are doing all the right things….. You are wonderful sons! God bless you on this hard journey….
My name is Bakhus Saba, I placed my Mother in a retirement home with Alzheimer's. I had been taking care of her for the past 7 yrs, she has been with me all my 52 yrs. The song Still A Child was written about what a caregiver is going through when placing a loved one in full care. John and Michele Law (The Laws) wrote the music and that's John singing in the video.
Here's the link to the video Still a Child
If you can post it on your site, facebook, Twitter or share your friends it would be great
It can be purchased on cd baby http://cdbaby.com/cd/johnlaw2
I want to bring an awareness to care giving especially for Alzheimer patients and the growing need to address this huge problem that our health care system will be under in the future WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT NOW. Thank you
Bakhus Saba Email email@example.com
Still a Child-written by John Law, Michele Law and Bakhus Saba (Socan)
If you knew what I was going through,
You'd approve of what I had to do.
Putting you away for the rest of your days,
Plays on my heart and it tears me apart
I walk away with you on my mind,
It's killing me to leave you behind.
You're begging me to take you home,
But I feel so guilty because I leave alone.
Cause I'm still a child when I look in your eyes.
And it make me cry and it make me cry
Now every hello feels like I'm saying goodbye
Goodbye good bye good bye
If I could have you back for one more day.
Would you reassure me what I'm doing is okay
Would you comfort me and ease my mind,
Cause only you can help me find my way
I can relate to your "keeper memories".
"Still a Child" is a very moving song. Thank you for posting that and the tremendous blog with photos. I have just returned home from visiting my mom (89 with AD) in the nursing home. Mom doesn't recognize any family members or acknowledge relationships, but we are thankful that she is still her happy, sweet self. She has recently stopped feeding herself and has just been placed in a wheelchair. This disese is dreadful for all involved. Prayers for all out there who struggle with guilt and decisions regarding care of their loved ones.
I know your fear, but I can tell you from experience that you and your brother are doing a great job. Your mom is smiling, active and happy! You can't ask for more than that. Just live it day to day because we can't know what the next day will bring. I found that out with my mother. Cherish what you have now. Mother went through what your mother is now doing and now mother can't walk and needs total and complete care 24/7, but we have kept her at home and she is not unhappy. She talks sometimes, but doesn't make sense, but we are enjoying her even in this stage. What else can you do? Just hang in there and know you are doing a great job and more than most sons would do. KUDOS TO YOU AND YOUR BROTHER! Valerie
I assume the young girl in the group of coloured photos might be a grand daughter she is so much like the young photo of your Mum Keep up the good work and hang on to Rosie. They say the worst thing is for a parent to out live the child but I would have to say the when the parent becomes the child and the roles are reversed is is also the hardest thing I have ever done
Who sings the song..i would love to hear it!
Thank you so much for sharing, it is sad to read all the comments, but also a comfort to know that it is not a struggle for just one. Kuddo's to you and your brother, your Mom looks happy and content, enjoy your visits with her at home and continue to photograph the good times. Please continue to share, and know that your sorrow, your fear and your compassion for your mom is welcomed and needed by all who read your story.
God bless you. If she is happy and safe then all is well. My dad has Lewy body dementia and my parents moved in with us last year. The Alzheimer's assoc has a terrific website. Get your mom a medical alert safe return bracelet to wear….if she wanders off, all of her information is immediately available to whomever finds her. Enjoy the good times when they happen. It is a sad and beautiful path you travel.
My sister has early onset dementia. Age 56 when diagnosed. I am sick about it. It seems like there is no manual of instruction- I'm winging it after talking to drs., long-term care facilities, and the Area Council on Aging. I will just have to learn to care for her as each day passes- Each day is different- she still has a lot of good days- I keep hoping the diagnosis is wrong, but the difficulties seem to be progressing. I have to take breaks from it- just so overwhelming to realize something she doesn't.
I loved your pictures and story. I live with mom since my husband died. She is 88 and has alzheimers. I am the full time caregiver and believe me, lf you can find a person like Rose you should try to keep her. A caregiver has to have the patience of Job.
It's a long road ahead, but your very lucky you and her brother take care of your mom. My brother isn't much help at all. My mom has a neighbor that helps with her during the day, and she is wonderful. She is 86, and my mom is 85. My mom fell 3 yrs ago and fractured her hip and slowly the dementia came on. I live 75 miles from her, so it's hard for me to see her often. I pray that Chris, our caregiver will be able to care for mom as it worsens. I'm blessed to have Chris for now. Loved your photos of your mom. My mom cries every time I get ready to leave to go home, so hard for me and I also wonder to how long will I have her with me. She was so independent up til she was 81. I worry at night for her because she doesn't have Chris stay at night.
Good luck to you. We are all in this together.
God Bless your soul,I guess all the love and care for your dear mother today,is the love and care that she have been given you and you should be proud of yourself.Not easy,to take care of a person with sickness like that,but your caregiver is an Angel!nice photo i love it! Lucky you, you still have your mother I lost mine 2 yrs ago and she was 92, and I miss her a lot but she know I love her,coz keep telling her that. Your mother is a lucky one……to raise a son like you,,,and your brother.
I so relate to your thoughts on the last picture. I recently spent two weeks with my parents in Alabama. (I live in North Carolina.) As I walked out the door the morning I flew home, it hit me like a bullet: this could very well be the last time I see one or both of my parents. As I sat in the airport I simply could not hold back the tears. So blessed to still have both of my parents but as each month goes by, dementia and other health issues take them a little bit closer to away.
I have never replied to a blog before either, but as some of these other folks have shared, I am very familiar with the effects and difficulties associated with caring for someone with Dementia and/or Alzheimer's. I work in an assisted living and memory care community, and part of my job is helping families with the transition from home to a Memory Care environment. It is a very stressful time for everyone, especially the loved ones having to make these decisions. I would encourage you and your brother to seek out a local Alzheimer's or Dementia support group, because they can be helpful in many ways. I have also written a collection of poetry related to this subject, and would love to send you a copy. People have told me they find it comforting and feel better knowing they are not alone in this type of journey with their loved ones. You can send me a private message on my facebook page if you are interested. My hope and prayer for you and your brother is to take it one day at a time, and thank God for your wonderful caregiver. God Bless.
Hi Mark,
My dad suffered from Dementia and passed away in 2009. Keeping a blog helped keep me sane. I'm sending my best to you, your mom, and your whole family.
It is very hard when you love so much, it hurts so much to see this wonderful lady, your mom, go through this ugly disease. She deserves so much better. Continue to be patient with her, and gentle. She still knows when someone is genuine, they can sense this. Many of us baby boomers are going through the same thing and I hope you and your brother continue to share your ups and downs on this site. All the best to the three of you.
This is what photography is about… these
are so touching and yes.. Most of us can or
will relate….
Beautiful, Mark. You're lucky the tobacco didn't kill her years ago. It took my father's life much to early. Just a reminder for all of us to photograph our parents. I often find excuses not to. It pisses me off.
I too can relate to all of this. My mom has alzheimers and is still living alone, 5 minutes from me but I work fulltime and still go to her house every night after work. I have to because of meds and I water her flowers and pay her bills and all of that good stuff. Mom still functions in her own home but her short termed memory is pretty much shot. It is getting to the point that I am going to have to look at options. Mom had to quit driving almost 2 years ago and really should have given it up before then but after getting lost on the road and having mulitple wrecks in a short period of time it had to happen. I heard on tv the other day that alzheimers is the 6th leading cause of death and I was like WOW. This isn't an easy journey for anyone and it is so hard on family. I just am taking one day at a time and am doing the best that I can do at this time. I am looking at maybe having someone come into her home while I am at work or do adult daycare. It can weigh you down if you let it and I have experienced every emotion possigle but at this point I am more settled and have found some peace.
This is such a beautifully-written, heartfelt, and poignant piece. I only know Mark as a (wonderful) photographer, but did not know he was also a great writer. I had aging parents (now deceased) and it seems that soon I might BE one! I sent this to my three chickadees – 25, 23, and 17. They are all loving and compassionate people, but this is serious stuff. How I would like to re-do the job I did of caring for my late father (he died at age 92 a few years back), but alas, the past is passed. My excuse (when I am racked out with guilt, which is often) was I was so busy raising children I had less time for his care.
Love the image of the ethereal-looking little girl holding the lamb on the cover of the recent Oxford American (Best of the South issue). What in the name of Jehoshaphat will become of the OA now? I wonder and I fret. I was photo editor there for several years when it was in Oxford. Marc Smirnoff founded and ran the magazine for a very long time (Yes, he could be a jerk, but he was passionate about and dedicated to the OA.)
Mark, keep up the exemplary writing and photography.
I burst out crying at your last image of your mother waving good-bye. I have many a photo….
Your work, Mark, is what keeps us humble and honest and reaching for that sacred level of universal emotion.
Bless you all.
Great entry Mark. Your last photo struck home for me. My mom is 92 and we have the same ritual, she keeps the door open and waves until she no longer sees my car. I am not a overly religious person but always find myself saying a small prayer for her, telling myself how much I love her and asking how will I gone on when she is no longer here. Best wishes to you and your family.
Having taken care of my Elderly Step Father for 2 years (he passed away) my heart goes out to you and your brother. Dementia is a thief in the night stealing little bits of the person you love. Please try to find time to read the book "The Thirty Six Hour Day" it helped me and my husband to traverse the slippery slope of this horrible disease. And for what it's worth hang in there you are not alone


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David Filner on Classical Music
David Filner assumed the administrative leadership of the San Antonio Symphony in November, 2012. Led by Music Director Sebastian Lang-Lessing, the San Antonio Symphony is celebrating its 73rd year this season.
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Cello Rap
It is so easy to complain about the vast wasteland of junk on the Internet. But, sometimes I'm surprised at what I find when I'm surfing for information about Classical music. Here is a great example of using the popular form of rap video to teach proper cello technique. The advice in this video about […] [Read More]

subset: commoncrawl


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Queen's bosses speak out to allay maternity fears
Posted: January 09, 2014|
BOSSES at Burton's Queen's Hospital have spoken out to allay fears of increased pressure on maternity services following changes withinthe now defunct Mid-Staffordshire NHS Trust.
South Staffordshire MP Gavin Williamson expressed concerns over the extra pressure placed on hospitals in the county following proposals to downgrade the maternity unit at the site.
Speaking to the BBC, he specifically mentioned that he was worried about the impact on services in Burton – a sentiment which has been echoed by the town's own MP Andrew Griffiths.
However, Burton Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust, which runs Queen's Hospital, said plans were in place to deal with any increase in deliveries which may occur.
Chief executive Helen Ashley said: "Throughout the period of consultation, we have worked with the Office of the Trust Special Administrator to understand the impact of no longer having an obstetricled facility at Mid Staffordshire NHS Foundation Trust.
"The impact of the changes would be only a small increase on the number of births here."
An announcement was made at the end of last year that maternity services at the hospital were to be changed from being consultant-led to midwife-led. Changes will also be made to paediatric services.
It came following a consultation launched on the back of an investigation which revealed 'appalling' failings within the trust.
The trust has now been dissolved.
During a discussion in Parliament earlier this week, Burton MP Andrew Griffiths spoke of his own worries for the impact these changes would have on Queen's. He also asked for assurance that the changes would be correctly manager to limit repercussions.
He said: "Queen's hospital is a Keogh hospital, which has huge financial debts and is struggling to survive. It is essential that this reorganisation takes place and is properly funded.
"If not, the knock-on effect on other hospitals, such as Queen's, and on the wider health economy, could be damaging and have a domino effect, with other hospitals falling over."


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Thank god for broke ass boys and huge college expenses. Their hard times bring us hard cocks. We hand out the cash and you enjoy the action.
Description: Kenneth jumps back onto Justin's hard cock at this time. Kenneth fingers Justin's ass as he sucks that cock and they are both moaning and ready for more than finger action. I suggest it is time for a
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Post this video in the JUB Forums with this code:
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Is the UK's 'most venomous' spider in your North Devon home?
Posted: October 08, 2013|
Several North Devon residents believe they have spotted the UK's 'most venomous' spider in their home.
Sightings of the potentially deadly false widow spider are on the increase and it is believed the arachnids are spreading across the country as dropping temperatures attract them into homes.
The purple and black spiders, which have abdomens the size of a 1p piece, generally live in walls, fences and the barks of trees.
A bite from a false widow can cause swelling, pins and needles and minor chest pains to humans, according to Tony Wileman, a conservation ecologist at the London Wildlife Trust.
Several readers have got in touch with the Journal to tell us of potential sightings in North Devon.
Tammy Knox, who sent in these photos (above), claims to have spotted several false widows in her garden in Northam.
She said: "There's quite a few. A couple are very large and blacker in colour and they hang upside down from the green bin and the shed. They come out at night and can easily be found with a torch and some courage!"
Emma Stratton, from Bideford, said she and her husband have found several black widows in their bedroom, bathroom, kitchen and garage.
She said: "It was the intricate web that was interesting. We captured the spider in a jar and researched it on the internet and found it to be a false widow. The children were really interested in it and we obviously made them aware that it could give a nasty bite so they should not attempt to pick up these spiders. We released the spider outside in a field next to our house.
"Since then we have found a further three in our bedroom, another two in the bathroom, one in the kitchen and several in the garage.
"It's all rather scary to me as I do have a phobia of spiders but have not, until now, been worried that they would bite. What I dislike about spiders is how quickly they move.
"My husband & I thought back over the time we have lived here & we can think of at least two others found in the past."
Environmentalist Matt Shardlow, of conservation charity Buglife, said both global warming and natural evolution could be to blame for the spiders' alarming rate of migration.
He said: "The false widow has long been prevalent across much of the south-west because of the milder temperatures.
"They come from warm countries and are usually killed off by our cold weather.
"But climate change may have helped and the species would have also adapted and evolved to cope with the colder weather."
Anyone bitten by a spider thought to be false widow should visit A&E or a GP immediately.
Have you spotted a false widow spider in North Devon? Contact the Journal on 01271 342432 or email email@example.com.


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Application Information
Scholarship Overview
This scholarship is for graduating seniors from Westfield High School in Westfield, New Jersey. The scholarship recipient will be selected based upon need, academic merit, and character.
How easy is it to apply?
Not too bad
This scholarship's application process may have items such as essays that could take a couple hours.
How much competition is there?
Relatively little!
This scholarship has a relatively low number of applicants.
Class Year: Is this you?
- High school senior
Home State: Is this you?
- New Jersey
High School: Is this you?
- Westfield Senior High


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The fortunate few who find their CD players spinning The World Won't End -- the second misleadingly named album from the Pernice... More >>
I am [every character] I can create. I'm somehow a part of them. I've got the same things in me, no matter how terrible they are. --... More >>


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Does my ticket allow for re-entry to the venue?
Platinum Badge, Music Festival Badge and Music Day Pass holders are allowed re-entry to Music Venues.
Music Headliner Pass holders are not allowed re-entry if they leave the venue.
Film Badge holders are allowed re-entry, but should still arrive early to screenings to ensure admission.
What time may I enter the venue with a Music Headliner Pass?
Typically you may enter the venue anytime after 9pm. Please make sure to follow all signage and instructions in case a line is formed at the entrance to the venue.
How do I buy tickets for a single film screening?
Tickets are $5 at the door of One Longfellow Square and typically go on sale approx 15-20 minutes before each screening. Film Fest Badge holders and Platinum Badge holders are given priority seating. We recommend that people arrive early to ensure admission as space is limited.


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Fans and families gather under the Gateway Arch to watch the B-52s.
All in all, the crowd was receptive and had fun. There were lots of folks gettin' down, while whole familes took photos of said folks while laughing; in general, good times were had. People seemed to "get" the B-52s, with the exception of the confused gentleman who walked past me and said, "They sound just like Pink Floyd." Continue reading Chrissy Wilmes' review of The B-52s' Fourth of July performance at the Gateway Arch. Photos by Todd Owyoung.


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About 3,000 Oregonians have run out of their benefits; hundreds more will lose theirs soon.
State universities and unions reached an agreement that includes pay freezes and furloughs.
Portland is teeming with young creatives who love the city, but can't seem to find work.
Half a year after expressing job-market worries, some Oregonians see a brighter picture.
Months after the presidential order, project labor agreements in Oregon have yet to surface.


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Dr. Jacquelyn Blakey
Dr. Jacquelyn Blakey began her optometric career as a research fellow in the Department of Ophthalmology at Sinai Hospital in Detroit, Michigan. This led to the position of Vision Therapist in Sinai's Low Vision Clinic. Her close work with pioneers in low vision, Drs. Ernest Gaines, ArnoldGordon and Morris Mintz, influenced her decision to pursue optometry. She returned to Sinai Hospital and completed a three month internship prior to receiving her degree.
Dr. Blakey received her Doctorate of Optometry degree from the Pennsylvania College of Optometry in 1995. She practiced as an independent Optometrist prior to opening her practice in May of 2002 in Canton, Michigan. Dr. Blakey's primary focus has been to provide more than a routine eye exam. She aspires to provide a full scope optometric practice that diagnoses and treats eye diseases as well as educates patients on the importance of optimal ocular health.


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I Can Take You There!
hi,This east china, I am local,Living Shanghai,born in soochow(suzhou)
Travel China with a real traveller!
Tour company and guide / personal assistant / business assistant
More Content by Samantha
Author: SamanthaLogin to Add to Your Guide Book
Nanjing native, let more and more people get to know and love Nanjing!
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Hours: 8am-5:30pm
Address: No. 2001 Renmin Lu
Phone number: +86 (0)512 6753 6505, 6753 9507
Price: 15 Yuan/ticket
How to Get There:
Local bus routes: Y1, Y2, 1, 102.
Re: Suzhou Silk Museum (Suzhou Sichou Bowuguan)Jun 02, 2014 — Gedeon
Want a better understanding of this ancient art? This is the place to go!
Suzhou Silk Museum (Suzhou Sichou Bowuguan)Jan 08, 2010 — Ruby
Suzhou silk is famous in all over China, they call it Su Xiu(苏绣) or Suzhou embroidery, Suzhou embroidery has been more than 2,000 years, as early as the Three Kingdoms period (AD 220 ~ 280 years), it already has the record of Suzhou embroidery.
Suzhou Silk Museum (Suzhou Sichou Bowuguan) it introduce the history of Suzhou embroidery, and display many Suzhou embroidery which was found hundres years ago, also they have some shops where you can buy Suzhou embroidery, they are looks very beautiful but it`s expensive because it`s all hand made.
Samantha is a tour guide in Nanjing, Jiangsu Province, China.
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Rajasthan Mining & Geology Department Constable Admit card 2013 DMG Admit Cards
An official notification was released by the Department of Mines and Geology, Udaipur, Rajasthan has for the recruitment of 1000 Constable Vacancies. Eligible candidates applied for the same recruitment exam from 28-07-2013 to 19-08-2013. The official Recruitment Notice may be downloaded from the below link for reference. The total number of vacancies is 1000 and age limit for the same is 18 to 23 years, as on 1.1.2014. Age relaxation is said to be extended as per the rules.
Educational Qualification –Candidates should possess Senior Secondary from a recognized Board.
DMG Constable Application Fee
Candidates had to pay Rs.500/- for Others, Rs.250/- for SC/ ST Rajasthan Candidates in form of Demand Draft through ICICI bank in any branch payable at Rajasthan.
Important Dates for Rajasthan Mining Constable Exam-
Starting Date for Online Application & Payment of Fee in ICICI bank: 28-07-2013.
Last Date for Online Application & Payment of Fee in ICICI bank: 19-08-2013.
Starting Date for Deposition of Online Application Hard Copy: 30-07-2013.
Closing Date for Deposition of Online Application Hard Copy: 21-08-2013.
Starting Date for Hall Ticket downloading: 08-09-2013 up to exam date
Exam Date & Timing: 15-09-2013 at 2:00 to 4:00 PM
Rajasthan Mining Constable Admit Card 2013-
The Online process of application is over and now the candidates who have applied for this exam are eagerly waiting for their admit card. The admit card may be downloaded from the following direct link:
**Link will be updated after 08 September 2013**
The Admit card may also be downloaded from the Official web portal link, given below:
- The above links will be activated, as soon as the admit cards are released by the official site.
- Candidates are requested to check for their uploaded photograph and signature, and report if any discrepancy is found.
- The Test Centre and date & Time of the test should be properly checked and remembered.
- The instructions are to carefully read and followed.
We wish you all the best for this exam. Prepare well. Keep visiting this page for all the latest updates and news from the education sector of India.


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Colleges >> Browse Articles
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All About Community CollegeAt Fastweb, we want you to be educated on every college option out there! That's why we've compiled a list of the most frequently asked questions regarding community college, so that you are properly prepared to make the right decision regarding your education. Check out Fastweb's most frequently asked questions regarding community colleges below: [gate] What's Community College? Community college is ...Published over 2 years ago |
The Common ApplicationYou've narrowed your choice of colleges down to seven different schools. Now comes the fun part: filling out seven different applications. This means entering your name/address/school data over and over and writing multiple personal essays. And if you can't apply online, this means reacquainting yourself with a typewriter. At long last, an alternative is gaining momentum: the Common Application. What Is ...Published about 7 years ago |
Online Degree MythsConsidering an online school to attend is no different than attending any other school. You weigh majors, tuition, and other factors much the same way. Yet, these schools carry a stigma that they aren't legitimate colleges or universities. It's time to debunk the myths surrounding online schools. Myth #1: Online Schools are Looked Down Upon By Employers A degree from an ...Published almost 5 years ago |
College Essay Editing Tips for ParentsYep, you've got a brilliant student on your hands – nobody knows it more than you. But, no matter how sharp your student, it's likely that he or she is going to have a little trouble coming up with the perfect college admissions essay. Don't worry! It's completely normal – after all, that's a lot of pressure on someone faced with ...Published over 1 year ago |
Top Ten Questions to Ask Your School CounselorYour guidance counselor is your ally in the college search process. Ask your counselor some of the questions on this list and you'll be amazed at what they can offer you. 1. What classes should I take? This question can encompass several things, including whether to take AP courses, what classes colleges want to see on a transcript, what electives it ...Published over 6 years ago |
Everything You Need to Know About Taking the GMATGearing up to take the GMAT? A few things you should know... The GMAT exam is a standardized assessment, delivered in English, that helps business schools assess the qualifications of applicants for advanced study in business and management. Over 1900 graduate business schools around the world use GMAT scores as a part of their admissions process. Most GMAT test takers start ...Published almost 6 years ago |
Understanding the Rise in Rejection RatesYou may have seen the headlines: College Rejection Rates at Record Highs. With schools like the University of Pennsylvania and Pomona College admitting less than two out of every 10 people who apply, you may think you'll never get into your top-choice school. Don't despair. The headlines appear daunting, but there's more to rejection rates than these headlines would lead you ...Published almost 7 years ago |
Find the Perfect Graduate SchoolWhether you just finished your undergraduate work or have been in the job market for years, pursuing an advanced degree can further your academic and career goals. Your focus of study is more specific than when you entered your undergraduate college, and so will the process of selecting a graduate program. Consider these areas while searching for your perfect graduate program: ...Published almost 7 years ago |
How a Closed Door Can Change Your OutlookThe dreaded small envelope. It's white, thin and has no indication as to its contents except the return address of a college. For the high school seniors who receive it, it is almost always a rejection letter. I opened up my mailbox the other day and discovered a small envelope from Occidental College, a liberal arts school in Los Angeles that ...Published over 8 years ago |
Seven Tips for Getting Your Money's Worth Out of CollegeCollege education is one of the single biggest purchases that you'll ever make. And yet, the average consumer knows more about buying a car or a washing machine. Why not get the most for your money? 1. Go see the prof. You might think that lectures and discussions are the main part of the college class. And you'd be right. But ...Published over 6 years ago |
The Legacy Factor in College ApplicationsAs I relax during my deeply cherished winter break, I watched one of my favorite films, Gladiator. Not only do I love the film for its superb action sequences, but I also find the semi-accurate story of a power struggle quite compelling. At the beginning of the film, Emperor Marcus Aurelius chooses between a courageous general and his son, the legacy ...Published over 8 years ago |
Campus Tour: Let Your Mind Breathe in the Pacific NorthwestAs our green conscientiousness soars with rising gas prices, it could be fun to take your road bike to visit some of the country's most distinctive colleges. Instead, we recommend that you take the whole family for a ride in your rented hybrid and make the 283-mile drive from Eugene, Oregon to Seattle, Washington. Make sure that you pack rain jackets ...Published over 6 years ago |
Playing It Safe in Facebook's Wild, Wild WestParents, in case you haven't heard, college admissions officers may or may not be cyber-scrutinizing your children. That's big news in the world of college admission. But it shouldn't be. College admissions officers are savvy and (like prospective employers) they can get a little curious about students. I'm not saying we have a breaking and entering situation here -- quite the ...Published over 6 years ago |
Is Early Decision Right for You? Get the Pros and ConsCollege planning can be stressful for both students and parents. Long before they face the challenge of finding college funding, students face an equally important challenge - the college admissions process. Filling out college applications and waiting to hear from admissions committees can make for a nerve-wracking senior year. But now schools are taking steps to alleviate student stress by instituting ...Published about 4 years ago |
Thinking Ahead to College AdmissionsThinking ahead to the college admissions process can be stressful, even for the most prepared of students. After all, how do you ready yourself for an event so far in the future? If you are beginning to plan for college in your freshman or sophomore year of high school, you have plenty of time before you'll start application paperwork. What should ...Published 12 months ago |
The Dos and Don'ts of Requesting College RecommendationsSome college applications require you to submit recommendations. Because this is such an important part of your application, you should be as organized as possible. To help you with this process, here is a list of things you should and shouldn't do when asking for a recommendation. DO begin early. Most recommenders need at least two weeks, to write recommendations, maybe ...Published about 8 years ago |
Know Your Tests: College Entrance ExamsAs you prepare for college, you'll encounter at least one (and probably more than one) of the following college entrance exams: PSAT/NMSQT: Preliminary Scholastic Aptitude Test/National Merit Scholarship Qualifying Assessment Test SAT Reasoning Test ACT SAT Subject Tests (formerly the SAT II) Admissions requirements vary from school to school. Consult your prospective school when deciding which test to take. Learn more ...Published almost 7 years ago |
Overcoming Test Prep Stress and AnxietyLet's get one thing out of the way: stress is a fact of life. Everyone, no matter how laid back they appear, experiences stress. It can manifest itself in physical, mental and/or emotional symptoms. However, stress can be completely manageable. This finals season, don't let stress control you. First, prepare for your final exams in a timely manner; and secondly, recognize ...Published 8 months ago |
Timeline for Applying to Graduate SchoolSenior Year of college – time to kick back, let loose and coast to graduation. Unless you plan to go to graduate school after college. In that case, you have quite a bit of work to do. Most of the grunt work in applying to graduate school occurs during the fall semester, but you should expect to be working on your ...Published 8 months ago |
So Whose Life Is It?Parents pay a lot for their children's college educations, and so they often feel they ought to help select their children's occupations. Sometimes it's subtle, and sometimes it's in-your-face coercion. In my experience, arranged careers almost never work out. If you're going into accounting, consulting or law school because your folks think that would be great for you rather than because ...Published over 6 years ago |


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biloxibob, i think you just jinxed him, before this year JJ never got into into any trouble, i dont really know if the last three knuckleheads had any problems before but when you play for the number #1 team in college football trouble comes to look for you.
JL gives the opposing teams the impression that we are not as good as our ranking and they tend to relax, then in comes JJ, as the defenders stand there with their hands on their hips they start thinking ahhhhh this is why they are number #1 in the nation, this formula has worked for us so far and hopefully this will carry us all the way to the National Championship.
Real LSU fans will have to deal with this foolishnish because unfortunately racsism is still alive and these fake fans would rather go to a nice bowl game instead of a shot for the highest prize because a black quarterback is lined up under center, personally i could care less what color our leader is just as long as we win.
Amen to all DAT!!
If JL was black he would have been boo'd out of town years ago, i keep hearing these so called LSU fans saying JJ should have been kicked of this team, just think where we would be now if we depended on Jarret to win games like this one, he did a good job getting us this far but real LSU fans knew we would need Jordan for games just like this one, we are now in a postion to play for the Nat Championship because of JJ, instead of just looking for a good bowl game.
All you Jarret Lee fans look in the miror and repeat after me "I am a racist"
Come out of the closet.
After all is said and done come Sunday morning some fans will wake up with a good hangover or a bad one, as much as i am looking foward to this game i am wondering which one i will have. LSU-Alabama fans will be on the most intense 3 hours and something roller coaster ride of our college football lives this year and we dont even have to wait until the SEC championship in December.
I hope no one gets seriously hurt but
I agree with daBlade44 lets not look past Auburn and dont forget our last two SEC wins were against teams without their best quarterbacks.
ObserveAll i still cringe sometimes when Lee drops back, but not as much as before, we now have a 3 or 4 headed monster at running back and that makes a big difference when deffensive backs have to lean foward just a little everytime our running backs look like they might take a handoff, i wouldnt want to be in their shoes.....Geaux Tigers!!!!
Any one that says Jordon Jefferson should not have played in that game or any other game is either a fake LSU fan or a racist, if you think he does not make this team better you obviously did not see the game Saturday. Real LSU fans want the best team we can put on the feild to chase the Naional Championship......Geaux Tigers
JL has done a good job of running a vanilla offense, has any one noticed that in this offense we dont run any trick plays, no quarterback draws, we run a plain hand off and mostly safe passes. With JJ back we can open the offense a little so teams wont crowd the line of scrimage. We have been able to push around less physical teams but that wont work agains the elite SEC teams. I think Jarret should still start but lets go back to the rotating quarterback's and make more teams respect us.
The only way LSU losses this game is Jarret Lee, if he throws no picks we will that simple
Could the ole Les be back?
All you people that is calling for Lee to be the starer do you not remember when he was the starter, as sad as it sounds Jefferson may throw interseptions but at lease its not a pick 6 and our deffense has a chance to keep us in the game.
At some point we have to say as Tiger fans its time for Les to go, the year we won the national championship Les was more comfortable in his skin as LSU's coach but he has gone from one of the best coaches in college football to one of the worst, a biddy ball coach could have done a better job then Les with 32 seconds on the clock, this team is too talented to win games so close, we will not get these types of chances next week against the Fla Gators.
Our season is in serious trouble when Lee's name is mentioned in the mix, this is a part of my past that i thought i could forget but i guess not, the night mare is coming back.
This was absolutely the worst coaching job I have seen in LSU history, i have been saying since the begining of the season that we should be running the ball more, we have a 3 headed monster at running back and all Crowton/Miles wanted to do was throw or get sacked, just like someone here said we were either in feild goal range or close to it why are we running plays that could possible lose yards. The whole coaching staff has to go.
Here comes that broken record that i keep playing, if we run the ball and not call risky lose yards plays we will win this game, Alabama does not beat teams they sit back and let teams beat themselves.
Run the ball and dont turn it over!!!!!
Still no running game still no attempt to run Charles Scott, there is no way we beat Alabama with no attempt to run the ball.
Its clear to see that racism is alive and well, all of you that agree with dumb buggy driver get on the boat and sail to what ever place the world is preparing for you.
I agree with you 100% E=MC2, when JJ hands the ball off from under center Charles gains 4 to 5 yards a pop, get rid of the spread formation it does nothing.
Milesthebest said that I was thinking "One sided" when i posted this a couple of weeks ago and i wonder if he/she still believes that (Les is that you)
Les how much money do you owe Crowton, we would be glad to help you pay that off so he can go and we could get back to playing LSU football.
If we don't run the ball between the tackles, we will get blown out of this game, I dont know why we abadon the running game in the second half until the fourth quarter against Georgia which kept the game close when we should have blown them out but if Crowton tries this again we will have no chance against the Gators.


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Texas on the Potomac
Washington news with a Texas accent
Posts filtered on Tag
Voter fraud? Charlie Gonzalez, Texas Dems say it's Republicans guilty of 'abuses'
"There is a sad irony that the same people who demand restrictive voter ID and registration laws to prevent fraud they cannot find would hire a man known to engage in questionable voter registration practices and then fall silent when he is suspected of repeating those unacceptable practices," said Rep. Charles Gonzales in a statement. [Read More]
Rep. Louie Gohmert calls Aurora shooting 'terrorist act,' questions why no one else in theater had a gun
The Huffington Post reported that Gohmert was asked why such "senseless" attacks occur. The Pittsburg Republican responded by saying that a "senseless crazy act of a derelict" had ties to "ongoing attacks on Judeo-Christian beliefs." [Read More]


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According to Tricities.com the Hawkins County Jail was put on lockdown this morning.
The lockdown followed inmates beating on their cells and burning items inside the cells, which caused part of the jail to fill with smoke.
The inmates were apparently still angry about a weekend search at the jial that turned up knives and tobacco products in the cells.
Nineteen inmates were placed in maximum security after the seach.
According to the report, no officers are in danger.
More details as the develop online and in the Times-News.
CLICK HERE for the full reportcomments powered by Disqus


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My friend is going to take a driver's license test but.....?
My buddy is going to take a driver's license test this Thursday but the car he's going to use doesn't have a license plate number because it's a brand new car. Does this matter? ...
Can i drive my moms car without my own insurance?
My mom has car insurance and everything, but i'm just wondering if i could like drive her car to the gym or something without adding me to her policy?
I heard its as long as the car ...
what if some one has your title of your car and sings your name what can you do?
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The dealer cannot legally sell a car without the proper title. I would go to the DMV to find out the legalities before taken ownership.
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You can try typing car titles and your state under a google search and there are companies that specializing in obtaining titles to vehicles. I don't know if they work only with dealers or also individuals but you could check it out good luck. By the way, you may be able to file a complaint with your states Motor Vehicle Division against the dealer if you are unable to obtain a title on it either through the dealer on or your own. It would be worth asking them if they know if the dealer was fraudulent in the vehicle's transaction with you. They can possibly help you. Good Luck.
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It is the dealers responsibility to provide you with the title or the paperwork necessary to have the vehicle retitled to you. I'd be all over their butt, otherwise your assuming the car was last titled in your current state....maybe , maybe not. the dealer should do a title search on the vin #, don't let them make this your problem, make them earn that fat commission they're making on you.
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Without the title, the dealership was not legally able to sell the car. Take it back and demand a refund.
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It is up to the dealer to get it for you..Otherwise he can't sell it
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I would go back to that dealer right away and tell him to take care of this now. Legally he can not sell you that car. If he does nothing get a lawyer and sue him
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dances with cats
kind of shady that the dealer did not have a title, most will not even take your car for junk if you do not have a clear, tangible title
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Go to the DMV! Bring the bill of sale.
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The dealer didn't have registration/title???????????? Geez!!! What kind of dealership is that???
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The dealer is not allowed to sell a car without the title, he is in big trouble. Contact the licensing agency for your state, ask for the Dealer's division. Tell them about your story, they will take care of it for you. I bet this is a small dealer, correct? I also bet he goes to the car auctions, buys cars damaged, and rebuilts, then resells, correct? He likely didn't complete your transaction legally and you will have a hassle getting the title. When you do, I bet it is going to be a salvage/or rebuilt title. Now, most people do not want to buy cars that have been totalled and rebuilt, these cars normally have all kinds of problems. Right now, the United States car dealers are taking cars from the flooded areas of Louisiana, cleaning them up a bit, and selling them for good money. The buyer will suffer terribly with this car, it will have nothing but problems and the dealer is hiding the title, likely. This could be what happened to you, I highly recommend you contact your state's dealer services division. Good luck.
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I made an animated elevator/platform by creating an animation in Maya and then attached a box collider as a child of the animation so that they move together. However my player uses the CharacterController and it falls thru the box collider (floor) as soon as the elevator starts animating*.
There are a couple of threads on the unity forum (here and here), but one of them is very old and neither of them has current or clear explanations of why the CharacterController has issues with attaching to moving objects and how best to solve the problem.
*note if I keep the player moving while the elevator is in motion, he does not fall thru the floor - he only falls thru when standing still. Also he's more likely to fall thru while the elevator is moving up than down.
asked Nov 24, 2009 at 01:27 AM
edited Sep 04, 2011 at 07:17 PM
I found this video helpful https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1UkKw12pQo
Jul 23 at 11:17 PM ecameracci
1 2 3 next page »
The 2D Gameplay Tutorial has a character that can stay perfectly on platforms. The needed code, derived from that tutorial, is below.
This solution is rather flexible.
Note that the below is NOT a complete script. It's only some code fragments needed for making the character stay on platforms. For a complete script, see the 2D Gameplay Tutorial.
The lastPlatformVelocity variable is not used for anything in the code above, but you can use it in the jumping logic to make the jumping speed get the inertia from the moving platform, such that the character is jumping relative to the platform reference and not to the global reference. You could also calculate a lastPlatformRotationalVelocity to get the rotational inertia from the platform when jumping, but for most games this would be overkill and only confuse the user.
answered Nov 24, 2009 at 10:37 AM
runevision ♦♦
I added the code from above, and so far I'm still falling thru the platform - same result as without the code. I also tried a code driven platform (moving the transform in FixedUpdate) but he falls thru that too exactly the same.
Perhaps there's a problem with the way my platform is setup? In both setups, I'm simply using a Box Collider for collision (the player collides just fine so long as the box isn't moving).
Or perhaps the code is fighting with my gravity code?
if (!controller.isGrounded) moveDirection.y -= gravity * Time.deltaTime;
Nov 24, 2009 at 05:07 PM rocket5tim
So after working on this for several hours today, I finally tried commenting out the activePlatform = null; line. And would you believe, without that line my character no longer falls thru the platform? I can't understand it -- that line is clearly in the 2D Gameplay Tutorial in the same location as where I had it. Weird.
Nov 25, 2009 at 04:48 AM rocket5tim
It's hard to say why it doesn't work in your case. All I can say is that it is very important that the .Move function on the CharacterController is called in the location shown in the code above. That is, after activePlatform is set to null and before the last code block with the Moving Platform Support comment.
Nov 25, 2009 at 09:01 AM runevision ♦♦
Well, like I said, it works fine if I remove the activePlatform = null; line. Maybe someone can chime in on what purpose that line has in the script? In any case, this appears to be the most useable solution at this point.
Nov 25, 2009 at 07:05 PM rocket5tim
If you don't set activePlatform = null; then the character should still be affected by the platform movement after having jumped off it, until you land on a new surface.
Nov 26, 2009 at 09:03 AM runevision ♦♦
Connect a script to the platform that detects if someone is on it, in LateUpdate adjust the y pos to the new y pos of the platform.
EDIT: I added an example implementation that should keep any character controller happily on a platform. It's a bit more complex than just adjusting the y position as it also handles horizontal movement and works with more than one char on the platform (so it maintains a list of all players on the platforms).
The platform probably has already a collider so you can't walk through it and stuff, to use the script, add a child GameNode to the platform, give it a trigger collider that's slightly smaller as the platform and extends a bit above the platform. Add the script and adjust the Vertical Offset var. If you need an example project, let me know.
EDIT2: Made a few modifications to handle jumping :-)
answered Nov 24, 2009 at 07:33 AM
Jaap Kreijkamp
This sounds like a promising solution, but could you provide a more detailed example? Even some psudo code would be helpful.
Nov 24, 2009 at 05:09 PM rocket5tim
This works great for keeping the player from falling thru an animated platform (I haven't tried it with a code driven platform yet). I had to find the right balance between the verticalOffset, gravity, and even the height of the trigger to keep the player from bouncing as the platform moved up/down. Thanks!
Nov 25, 2009 at 04:14 PM rocket5tim
While it does keep the player from falling thru, there's an issue: If I adjust the verticalOffset so that the character doesn't "bounce" when the platform is moving UP, then he cannot jump from the platform. My jump button checks to see if isGrounded = true, if it's not then he can't jump. There's something about being pinned exactly to the center of the trigger that makes the character think it's not grounded. Maybe the collider is being pulled slightly thru the elevator collision? If I set verticalOffset so that the character "bounces" a little when the platform is moving he can jump off.
Nov 25, 2009 at 06:37 PM rocket5tim
Ah, you want to jump! How eighties! winks at DragonAge where your char can't even jump a 10 cm ledge. Edited the code in my post to handle jumping, just copy/paste over old code and it should work. Note that the y offset must be high enough that the char's collider isn't through the platform, but preferably low enough that the colliders skin is. So try adding a cm of 2 if jumping doesn't work when platform is going up.
Nov 26, 2009 at 01:43 AM Jaap Kreijkamp
Hi, I am using a script based on ThirdPersonController script, I tried to add this solution but failed miserably, something worked but the character appeared in a place that wasnt the place I seted, and he was sliding the platform. My original solution was to parent it, worked very well but I am afraid of the physical consequences of such act. Please, can you give me a hand? to improve the ThirdPersonController with this platform solution?
Sorry about my noobish and my terrible english!
Aug 06, 2011 at 02:12 PM Fubiou
There's several ways to do this of various complexity, depending on what you need. For a simple elevator, you probably want the simplest and easiest way - which would be as follows:
Create a new .js script with the following code in it and add it to the trigger collider:
function OnTriggerEnter (other : Collider) { other.transform.parent = gameObject.transform; } function OnTriggerExit (other : Collider) { other.transform.parent = null; }
What's happening here is fairly obvious. When anything enters your trigger (like, for example, a CharacterController), it becomes parented to it. Anything parented to the trigger will move when the elevator does. When you step out of the trigger, the parent link is removed. Simple. :)
answered Mar 16, 2010 at 12:59 AM
thank you! This way is simple but very effective. It is ideal for me because I did not have to change anything else.
May 12, 2010 at 01:32 PM Deise
Thank you very much for the advise, ALTHOUGH I have encountered a problem. I'm not sure if you are an expert at unity3d but I have a firstpersonplayer with weapons. The weapons are attached to the main camera but when I step on the platform, it does not move correctly with the camera. It will not stay in an exact position relative to the camera. Do you have any ways of fixing this kind of problem?
May 29, 2010 at 04:57 AM 0V3RWR173D
I looked forever to find how to do this!!! You made it so simple! Thanks!
Jul 27, 2010 at 10:52 PM James 2
problem !! my 3d player looks liked he has been just came out from toilet or been squeezed but a roller truck.
Nov 10, 2012 at 09:36 PM munaeem
in the script make sure you reset the players transform.localScale to 1,1,1 or else it will be squished
Nov 11, 2012 at 01:23 AM moinchdog
The CharacterController is very simple in function.
Every FixedUpdate it applies the Move() function to determine where it should go. Typically, gravity is assigned, so it always attempts to move down. The Move() function detects objects between the controllers current and intended positions, and will stop moving when a collision is detected. Of course it's much more complex than that, but that is the idea.
However, if between calls to Move() in FixedUpdate, you move the ground above the current position of the CharacterController, the check the CharacterController performs will say "There is nothing below me" and so it will fall. Makes sense.
Now, onto fixing it.
First, to make things behave well, one trick is to make sure all objects the CharacterController interact with are also being adjusted in FixedUpdate. Animations will run in Update. I would suggest animating the platform in code rather than in Maya, and also in the FixedUpdate loop. While there are ways to make what you suggest work, I think it will be far less complicated in this manner.
Depending on your game logic, there are a few options. Personally I dislike parenting the CharacterController to other objects because it can result in some strange behavior. Instead, create some code to tell the CharacterController when it is interacting with a moving platform, and allow the moving platform to tell the CharacterController how far it should move this frame, and then reposition the CharacterController manually.
answered Nov 24, 2009 at 02:45 AM
Brian Kehrer
I have code that moves a Character Controller to another place on the map, and it may be inside of a collider that it should instead be walking on, afterwards, so it can then fall through. The teleportation happens in OnTriggerStay(), so I don't think there's anything to be helped in terms of FixedUpdate(). Any tips? You think the solution is an OnTriggerStay() in the floors that it can teleport into, which pushes the Controller out far enough so that it's on top again?
May 15, 2010 at 04:09 AM Jessy
Is OnTriggerStay even being called? If you teleport in, it might get messed up. What I finally ended up doing was very complicated. I used a dummy rigidbody specifically to catch that case. Obviously if you are very far off, it will still fail, but it might catch close cases.
May 17, 2010 at 04:30 PM Brian Kehrer
Why don't you just make the CharacterController as the child to the floor of the elevator. That solves it. Simple!
answered May 04, 2012 at 04:17 AM
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text:
Heart failure is a condition in which the heart is no longer able to pump out enough oxygen-rich blood. This causes symptoms to occur throughout the body.
Heart failure is often a long-term (chronic) condition, but it may come on suddenly. It can be caused by many different heart problems.
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Heart failure is present when:
As the heart's pumping becomes less effective, blood may back up in other areas of the body. Fluid may build up in the lungs, liver, gastrointestinal tract, and the arms and legs. This is called congestive heart failure.
The most common causes of heart failure are:
Other heart problems that may cause heart failure are:
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Symptoms of heart failure often begin slowly. At first, they may only occur when you are very active. Over time, you may notice breathing problems and other symptoms even when you are resting. Symptoms may also appear suddenly after the heart is damaged from a heart attack or other problem.
Common symptoms are:
Your health care provider will examine you for signs of heart failure:
Many tests are used to diagnose and monitor heart failure.
An echocardiogram (echo) is often the best test for heart failure. Your doctor will use it to guide your treatment.
Other imaging tests can look at how well your heart is able to pump blood, and how much the heart muscle is damaged.
Many blood tests may also be used to:
If you have heart failure, your doctor will monitor you closely. You will have follow-up appointments at least every 3 to 6 months, but sometimes much more often. You will also have tests to check your heart function.
Knowing your body and the symptoms that your heart failure is getting worse will help you stay healthier and out of the hospital. At home, watch for changes in your heart rate, pulse, blood pressure, and weight.
Weight gain, especially over a day or two, can be a sign that your body is holding onto extra fluid and your heart failure is getting worse. Talk to your doctor about what you should do if your weight goes up or you develop more symptoms.
Limit how much salt you eat. Your doctor may also ask you to limit how much fluid you drink during the day.
Other important changes to make in your lifestyle:
Your doctor will ask you to take medicines to treat your heart failure. Medicines treat the symptoms, prevent your heart failure from getting worse, and help you live longer. It is very important that you take your medicine as your health care team directed.
These medicines:
It is very important that you take your medicine as your doctor and nurse directed. Do not take any other drugs or herbs without first asking your doctor or nurse about them. Drugs that may make your heart failure worse include:
The following surgeries and devices for certain patients with heart failure may be recommended:
Severe heart failure occurs when treatments no longer work. Certain treatments may be used when a person is waiting for a heart transplant:
At a certain point, the health care provider will decide whether it is best to keep treating heart failure aggressively. The patient, along with his or her family and doctors, may want to discuss palliative or comfort care at this time.
Often, you can control heart failure by taking medicine, changing your lifestyle, and treating the condition that caused it.
Heart failure can suddenly get worse due to:
Most of the time, heart failure is a chronic illness that gets worse over time. Some people develop severe heart failure. Medicines, other treatments, and surgery no longer help at this stage.
People with heart failure may be at risk for dangerous heart rhythms. These people often receive an implanted defibrillator.
Call your health care provider if you develop:
Go to the emergency room or call the local emergency number (such as 911) if you experience:
Most cases of heart failure can be prevented by living a healthy lifestyle and reducing your risk for heart disease.
Review Date:
Reviewed By: Michael A. Chen, MD, PhD, Assistant Professor of Medicine, Division of Cardiology, Harborview Medical Center, University of Washington Medical School, Seattle, Washington Also reviewed by A.D.A.M. Health Solutions, Ebix, Inc., Editorial Team: David Zieve, MD, MHA, Bethanne Black, Stephanie Slon, and Nissi Wang.


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