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Subject: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Fri Mar 11, 2011 4:57 pm
Mikalhardie The End Of The Beginning
Well here it is the piece of writing you guys have been waiting for. This story along with some hidden secrets may change the way you feel for me whether it's for the good or for the worst either way it's every reason why we are all here it's our story seen through my eyes. I hope you guys appreciate the effort I've put into this please read all of it that's all I ask and just have a good read yeah You may want to post about the sheer size of the read first before you continue or I'll be waiting all day for use to reply to this
The Virtual Kid Chapter 1
Michael Martin Hardie born 19th January 1995. My parents a German and a Scottish mum they have raised me pretty good just a normal family to be honest. We sit together to eat dinner as a family not many arguments break out we talk occasionally if anything is normal about me it's the family ,yet I can't help but think they have had no effect on me throughout my entire life I have not learned anything from them. My dad never speaks to me and I never speak to him is usually how it goes I have no real complaints maybe wished I could know my dad a bit more but I don't think he's interested in me but so what that's his problem. I was a lonely child until I had my smaller brothers I had no one too look up to at such a young age. . Nothing really has changed but the events that took place from then until now I could have done with someone like that a guy who I knew was far superior to me someone to learn of to tell me if I was wrong or right, if I was different, if I had potential but now I need no one ever I'll show them all that I was always so much more alive than them!
I guess anyone's story of childhood starts from primary school I was no different let's just say I was not the popular kid. I was the kid who didn't like to get involved with sports my social skills were -10 I sort of just sat there thinking of dragons or whatever a small child would. Is that my fault that I was going to fail from day 1? No I do not really blame anyone for that but school is the place you go too to learn these skills right. Fucking bullshit the teachers treated me like crap everyone made an embarrassment out of me at any given opportunity I use to try to hide between the crowds try to stay out of sight almost out of existence I was a child who didn't understand at the time I blamed myself for everything I thought I was everyone's godamn problem After about 4 years of being bullied by my fellow classmates, my teachers, myself. I was like a ticking bomb about to explode and so I did. It was lunch time I was just sitting down on a bench as I usually do then I saw a group of kids approaching me I'm not going to mention names.. they were just going about their business but this day I was so not in the mood they taunted me for about 5 minutes I just stayed silent trying to not too show them any signs of weakness or attention but then One guy spat on me and said something's at that age would be hurtful I can't really remember what he called me it was a blur I was so stupid at that age i didn't even know what the insults meant. lol I just flipped I remember picking up a rock and beating the guy to the ground where I then smashed his face several times with the rock almost killing the him at the age of 6 I think. The crowd of people just stood back until a teacher came. I never saw that kid again he didn't die I just know that otherwise I wouldn't be here. So then all of a sudden I'm the one needing anger management and needs attention I don't need fucking attention that stupid fuckwit got my attention and now look at him actually ohno his face is so fucked up its hard to look. I just wanted left alone to observe the world I must have been just about 6 or 7. The worst part was I got blamed I got into so much trouble my parents were ashamed? How the fuck am I supposed to win? I was just so confused isn't that what the guy wanted? Sure at the time I wasn't thinking like this I was in a shock I couldn't sleep for weeks and I was made too feel ashamed. But the guy wanted a reaction they all wanted it I gave them everything they wanted out of me I remember just staring at him as his body was being out in an ambulance and for some reason I smiled. I guess I was going for the crazy psychopath look or maybe I was. I just felt alive in the end I won as usual. Everyone left me alone sure I got into a few fights there was always a bully there was always a problem at primary school but for the rest f my primary school years I studied life
I used to just sit on the steps at lunch break and observe the world; I observed everything so I can have a better understanding. 6 years I did that for I used to have the odd friend come in every month or so I did have my childish moments I'm just looking at from what I see it at the age of 15 it's like its only wanting me to remember the worst parts and I'll be honest it is all bad I had a tough childhood. Why was I bullied? You guys probably think I must have been some weird smelling ugly fat kid right? Well I wasn't really that bad i was just picked on for shyness and I don't think anyone at the ages of 5 can make fun of someone because of looks it didn't matter I was glad I was bullied I've learned to block out most pains and how to deal with tough situations. I'm not going to say thank you bullies they were complete pricks who are now drug addicts hurray but I guess I was treated like crap for a reason.
Out of school I improved my and freed mind I remember every day I would go to the woods(Forrest) and climb tree's every day and sit there for hours just thinking and thinking I don't know why I was far too much of a scary kid. And still after all so many years of me thinking I still didn't understand the world we lived-in or should I say I never felt it I never got to feel normal. Do I regret that.. ehmm at the time yeah I felt like proper crap so as you guys probably knew I had a tough young childhood I wanted to pretend I had no problems I do but I just have extreme ways of dealing with them. Did I play games at the time yes I did I had my Nintendo 64 and ps1 and eventually ps2 I was quite involved with games super Mario 64 just taking all my problems away so I can be an Italian plumber jumping on things to kill them I was a very lonely child I had few friends I never considered them friends in fact the one thing I can look back at my very young childhood(just to mention I still sort of am a child I'm 15 or 16 by the time use read it haha) was my tenpin bowling.. yes I know it's must be they gayest sport to be good at rolling balls down an alley knocking down some pins lol it's a lot harder than you think and this helped my gaming due to extreme hand co-ordination is needed anyway I was good at bowling I'm talking very good I've quit for good now but I was one of the best bowlers in the world by the age of 13 I was ranked 2nd in the world and 1st as an under 18 I was the youngest player ever to represent Scotland at the age of 10 I was the youngest person ever to win a European medal and the youngest player of any sport too appear at the commonwealth games I was also set to be the youngest player of ANY sport to appear at the 2010 Olympics but I sort of stopped playing because my thumb was like fucked up from bowling so I pulled out I also have the record for the most powerful shot of all time it was 139.2 miles per hours haha I broke the previous record by over 30 miles LOL I had contracts from USA bowling teams I ripped them up they looked good at first but they were actually ripping me off lol and they thought I was too stupid to read the contract fucking idiots but apart from bowling and almost killing people these events are very passive I don't remember much so I'm guessing they had no real impact on my life I don't remember any key events apart from that one day in fact this entire chapter is irrelevant to me.. Now high school began.. now everything was going to change years of observing the normal now I was going to feel it, now I'll put all that observing to practise. No more thinking time.
The New Beginning Chapter 2
High School... Huh. Not long just finished it I guess college is kind of similar I remember my primary school teacher telling me the high school is a lot more strict and you will understand how to become an adult. Yeah ok whatever its basically the first 2 years are complete non-sense then you have 1 serious year for the exams and then after the exams you realise the exams are fucking pointless. My first day of high school... Hmm a new group of people a new set of teachers no one knows me it's a new beginning almost. After years of observing I can finally become one of the "cool" kids I watched them like some crazed follower. I don't know why I acted the way I did but I basically became the most popular guy in high school I put on a personality I never had a personality before I suited my personality depending on who I'm talking too so everyone liked me .Instead of people laughing at me they laughed with me I had friends I had lots of them in fact everyone was my friend if I chose them to be my friend I had my now changed attitude and very good social skills to do this actually I don't think I changed I wasn't anyone to begin with so this was me I think. For sure people from my primary school gave me the odd wtf look. I kind of acted very immature (knowing that I was) I made people laugh I'm the one who gave the teacher the most retarded answers in the world. I remember one where the teacher asked "Michael if you were on a deserted island what would you bring with you." I'm sure we've all been asked that question. Well I'm the guy who answered a "speed boat to get out of it." LOL I got in trouble for that fucking answer but everyone knew it was the best answer anyone has given too that even I thought oh c'mon that's harsh even if I'm joking I'm still a genius right? People loved me they wanted joke after joke I was giving them not receiving them. Guys wanted to be me and Girls wanted to be with me I was the god of real life yes your virtual king was once the king of reality I was feeling everything I wanted...
Yet I felt like crap nobody cared about me either way they wanted me to give what I had they used me they were all the same they used to taunt me too look cool and now they were taunting with me too look cool saw myself become the one of the people I swore to destroy. . was there any turning back I didn't know what to do I had it all everyone wanted me but nobody not one of them asked me how I felt they assume I'm fine I'm so Mr. Perfect nothing could possibly go wrong for Michael. This was the first time I realised how messed up my mind really was I locked myself in my room I screamed out my frustration and anger when no one was looking I was becoming someone I wasn't but I didn't know who I was too begin with now everyone thinks I'm cool and everyone who's not cool thinks I'm a dick is that what I wanted. NO I didn't to make everyone happy whilst being happy myself I wanted happiness without knowing what it truly is.
The next day I decided the cool kids are not really my kind of people so I decided let's talk to the emo gothic people try and get somewhere where people understand. their minds are supposed to be fucked up like mines these are the people...Surely? Man just trying to have a normal conversation with them is impossible without them crying about why there so fat and ugly and talk about complete non-sense thinking there intelligent, thinking because there not cool they must be so much clever than me and everyone else? If you're clever why the fuck do you look like a clown and cover yourself in black clothing and then go home to loneliness' then cut you're fucking wrists a smart person wouldn't do that so don't tell me how you can think you can give me a smart answer for anything you're your pathetic you're not cool, you're not smart so what? then they do there "I'm not ugly I'm different" bullshit .Oh shut up your fucking ugly get over it get on with your fucking life how about you do something about it rather than sit there talking to yourself all day asking yourself why can't I get a girlfriend. They ask me this and man I'm an honest guy so I told them exactly why because Goths/emo's are fucking pathetic and are cowards they act like there better but there not thieve already failed.
I realised I didn't belong there I still had my friends which varied from Goth to chav to nerd to slut they were just someone to talk to at lunch time In ever really got too know any of them I sort of went solo I had friends I guess I was happy enough no one is perfect just got to wait.
The kick in the heart chapter 3
Aged 12 year 2 and a half years of high school left I got my first girlfriend I guess I liked her because
A. She was hot
B. No one knew her at my school
C. And she went to my bowling club(yes hot girls play bowling. . occasionally) lol
I always had a crush on her but I never expected us to eventually go out but we did we were pretty special together this was a new experience for both of us we both have not told anyone but our closest friends about this relationship I won't mention her name I think a few of you already know but to prevent use all perving on her facebook page I will not say but anyhow yeah we were perfect or supposed to be I couldn't get my mind straight throughout the entire relationship there was so many things I found mysterious about her the way she moved the way she never really could look at me straight in the eye. and I knew she felt the same about me because I am always mysterious looking I don't do it deliberately but I tend to just stop and stare in the same spot for about 20 minutes I always look like I'm hiding something or thinking about something crazy which I usually am but sometimes I just like day dreaming and I tend to blackout a lot. We carried on with this relationship I as a young teenager as expected wouldn't care about the girl I probably just wanted a "girlfriend" just something new maybe if every other feeling I get sucks maybe the most so called powerful of all emotions Love could calm me down and make me see straight...
It didn't work or at least I didn't let it take over. But now everything was going to change and I had no power over it. We had sex a week before my 13th birthday wow I remember that well I don't know why we did it just happened she was a horny teen and I was a horny teen. People always at my age say they regret it when they lose their virginity they say they weren't ready. well I don't regret it means I don't have to worry about it in the future. We never spoke about that night to anyone not even out closest of friends as much as I wanted to go "yeah in your face I fucked her so hard yeah look how cool I am the little fat kid got laid haha fuck you popular fast kids." I know I couldn't ever do that it wouldn't be fair on her and it would come back to haunt me. So I stayed silent. As always.
A month after my birthday my life's going ok I'll be honest it's the best it ever was. Like most things in life it Didn't last long.. So one ordinary morning I woke up first thing on my mind is my girlfriend is that what love is? When you're first thought of the day is your girlfriend and the she's the last thing you think about before you sleep. I think I was in love with her. So as I said I woke up I get dressed I've realised I've not had contact with her in about a week and every time I phoned there was no answer. I then walked around too her house. I usually never went anywhere near her house she told me not too but it was the only way I could face her
There was her mum and dad they told me she's gone away and she never wants to see me again. Something was not right. . but looking back I can't understand why when I was told that I didn't feel pain all I did was go blank like nothing could affect me. I guess I was used to rejection, used to the fact no one really cared about me, no one really thought of me as a close friend. Most Teenagers do feel exactly the same way about it but I'm the only one who didn't have too bitch about it too everyone else I just kept on going, kept looking forward knowing if I ever looked back death will be staring me in the face.
I then continued life I tried to get into contact with her, her friends told me nothing they wouldn't budge but they gave me the most menacing look like it's all my fault, like I was causing pain too so many people, I started to think usually I'm awesome at thinking so I thought and I thought but I just couldn't understand anything or what must have happened for once I couldn't just know what happened, ignore it and get on with life acting like it's just another obstacle the world has thrown at me and I put on my nothing shall stop me attitude Muhahaha look at me nothing will get inside of me and twist the mind nothing will get the better of me.
I eventually managed to somehow cope with the whole situation after a month of asking myself questions of what must have happened I just sort of forgot although I could hear it screaming at me from the back of the mind every time I opened my eyes. 5 months later I'm having my usual run around the streets(yes im cool like that), And I saw her she was staring right at me I'm thing what, how, when I just stood froze staring at her, felt like a dream yet so real but I saw something different in her she looked different somehow she looked lifeless. she then turned away in a heartbeat and started walking in the other direction I couldn't believe it was her 10pm just standing in the middle of nowhere it was like she wanted me to find her but she just couldn't face me, She really looked like she needed me but somehow I triggered some bad memories or something.
I went running after her shouting her name her walk started to get faster but like all girls running is a no no. I eventually got to her we were standing in the middle of the woods pitch black we could barely see each other she just started crying she looked like she almost wanted to scream, she pushed me away. I then told her look just look around you, you have nowhere to hide you can't just keep running away because you know I'll keep god damn running until I get a fucking answer" she kept crying I waited I just walked around with my hands above my head trying to process my mind keep it flowing I needed to make sure that whatever she was about to tell me I had a smart answer for it.
I waited a couple of minutes until she calmed down and she told me she didn't mean to hurt me, she told me it was her fault not mine and she didn't mean for any of this I told her babe just please tell me what is wrong because this is really starting to mess me up now. And then she told me. . .
I got her pregnant
I didn't know how to respond I was feeling every emotion possible Guilt, betrayal, everything that can make your mind go mad. All my smart answers were out the window.
She told me that her mum and dad found out she was pregnant she kept it a secret for weeks but when they found out they went rage at her they kicked her out of the house so she moved in with her grandmothers and she had an abortion(luckily). I just almost fainted I went with so much anger not at her but at myself she had to go through all of this and I was never fucking there to help her she told me she was banned from seeing me. .
I lost the plot I completely blacked out all I remember is I started running towards her house I wanted to kill her dad for making her go through all of this. I think she knew what I was going to do she tried to stop me but no one can stop me like this. IM SUPPOSED TO SUFFER NOT HER I thought I was having it tough with no one giving me a straight answer every time I asked what had happened too her everyone knew what I did but me someone had to pay, this was my fault she didn't deserve this I was about 50 yards from her parents' house I remember she screamed "don't do it I love you" this is when I knew I didn't love her because even that didn't stop me. Even the strongest of emotions was never going to match my emotional barrier pushing everything away.
I'd rather not speak of what happened next I'm not ashamed of what I did the guy deserved what he got but let's just say I was lucky to get away with what I did. .
We tried to restart the relationship we really tried but I can see it in her eyes that she would never look at me the same way as before.
Women huh
THE VISION Chapter 4
For now on I went back to my usual ways trying to find a meaning to life, trying to find something to live for. I spent a year almost completely blank just the same routine wake up, school , food, sleep this is what the teachers explained was life to be hard working and follow the rules and so I did. I did everything they said will make my life better for the future. Every day I tried to look for a future there was nothing I saw nothing in this thing called reality I tried so hard to fit in and on occasions I thought I did I thought I found a friend or a group but they all turned out to be the same selfish lazy social hypocrites like everyone else making reality a living fucking hell to some people
So almost entire year of studying life and realism and then on the 25th of December 2008 I got my PS3 I had been waiting for some time for this I've always enjoyed playing games but I never got myself to involved or at least I convinced myself that I am not a "sad loser gamer." Yeah I was like everyone else thinking playing games is not cool there for people who give up on life. Huh what did I know?
3 months later everything almost the same I was living what I thought was a life I had friends the occasional girlfriend and I was good at sports I was the one to talk to if you wanted a laugh or if you were upset. Why I still felt empty will never know, people I tried to talk to did not understand they were so confused they thought I was living the teenage dream. But now was the time I realised everything when I understood what I really wanted the next few weeks I took what we've all heard and tried to understand as the vision. The day I picked up RFG must be almost 2 years prior to the release of this text. I played through storyline I thought yeah this destruction was awesome I really was getting into gaming at this point, games like fallout and Heavy rain that took me too that happy place, that made me feel like when im playing the game that I can make the difference to this story…. Just like life
I had played the vast lands of Washington D.C in fallout 3 I was playing lots of games more than I thought I knew but I always convinced myself to stick to life I will be rewarded… No reward.
May 2009..
I went for my usual walk(man why does so much shit happen when I go for these fucking walks lol) I was listening to music just thinking just kept on thinking trapping myself inside my mind thinking about life, gaming and random shit like why do Germans do german things? I don't remember the event a lot but I was walking I was listening to music I was half way across the road and BANG... just one moment can change everything, everything could of ended or if the event didn't happen I might not have had the vision and desire that I have of the world today
I was on the floor almost dead I was hit by a car I was knocked out completely cold but yet I remember I can still hear the music coming from my earphones luckily it was my favourite song I was thinking well if I'm going to die then yeah not a bad scene lol (I wasn't thinking that at the time but I just thought that right now) if you were my friend on RFG before this happened im sure you'll remember me being offline for at least 3 months. I was in a deep coma but I lived as you guys have probably guessed haha
Now you guys think oh my god hit by a car this is horrible but it didn't really change me but the moment of waking up from a coma and realising nothing has changed, I could of just died and left the world and no one would remember .The world would continue on being greedy ,selfish and disloyal the world is not fair no one knew I was gone not even my dearest of friends or my girlfriend at the time in fact she already had a new boyfriend without knowing what had happened. This is the day I told myself I am going to change everything I will die knowing I did something to change the world to make it happier to make it fair. Yes as dark as I seem I'm only seeking happiness for all of us. Look around you guys look at the world you tell me you live in and look at me in disgust as I convince myself that im virtual. Look around people dying, people starving whilst some are born in good wealthy places and family's and get everything that god would desire by doing absolutely fucking nothing and they look down and laugh as we the really people of the world fucking work hard in hope we will eventually be rewarded, that we will get what we really god damn deserve. I'm fed up of watching people live life based on pure LUCK
it's the same cycle processed over and over again this was the day I turned to PS3 and everything came to life I was going to create the virtual world, MY WORLD where I knew everything where I made the goddamn rules and those rules are if your good then you deserve a reward and that is gaming if you play good you rank up. In reality it doesn't matter as long as your born "good looking" or have "rich parents" you have already succeeded and you didn't even have to fucking work for it.
Look at the rules we follow.
You have to Listen, think hard, work hard, don't do anything stupid, don't fuck your sister.
I followed the rules like all of you and like all of you were not getting very god damn far are we. But we get through it because we all have the same determination to never give up on anything.
GAMING Chapter 5
Here is the beginning, here is where my quest all began, and I didn't even know this was how it would start.
Before Red faction guerrilla I was mercenary trophy hunter sort of just lazing around trying to get myself indulged with virtual reality. I never played online until I picked up RFG I thought Multiplayer was just some crappy bullshit for players to argue on whose best even though they are both incredibly shit at the game. I thought that because of COD and I still do. RFG changed that from the start I found it quite challenging. I found my usual strategy of just aiming for the head actually was a main strength of the game I found if I aimed for the hardest part of the body to hit then you will be good at this game. NO other game does this that's why RFG is supreme and always will be the most skilled game out there. I had RFG on rent the first 5 days I played single player and completed with pretty much ease just strolling through the trophies like I do.
The last 2 days I played online now and there got to about blue 2 stripes I found it fun but like all rented games I was like not worth the buy so it returned too Blockbusters without a 2nd glance. About 2 weeks later my friend wanted to borrow grand theft auto 4 from me and I was like well let me see your collection. The only game he had that I didn't was RFG and I was like grr fine I'll get the online trophies. Imagine if I said no wow I can't even think where I would be right now haha(its moments like this when I look back and see decisions that seem so small can make a huge difference). So I played online I realised I was better than most blueberries and I seemed too keep up with most reds. Full teams of reds usually took care of me with ease but I always got 10-15 kills too show that I have massive potential. I became very good at the game pretty quickly in fact from the start I was already a good player as long as assault rifle was the starting weapon. When I was yellow and 2 striped I got my first friend request.
This may surprise you guys and the person themself but my first RFG friend was marxus_chainsaw. Yes seriously marxus that Austrian/German kid ,I think he added me just before he went on one of his long breaks from the game and he sort of remained there randomly for almost a year until he joined us haha marxus is not exactly the highlight of H@RDIES or RFG but he's been here from the start and he's been on my friends list long than anyone. Thanks marxus you're a true H@RDIE but this taught me that sometimes you just need to accept the random add as weird as it is.
Anyhow one thing may surprise you and that's the fact I didn't know what the backpacks did until I was a yellow. Man that is more of a fail than squalls face(ok maybe not) but seriously I went around shooting people I was like how is that guy running so fast or why do I have a huge thing on my back and why did I just get attacked by a massive ball of fire.
I kept strolling through RFG I eventually met mingo we were both yellow and like ¾ of RFG he introduced me too nearly everyone he was a god too me back then. Eventually realised he's just a sad fat lazy stoner with nothing else better to do but too shout at fat kids playing video games all day anyway I rolled with him, djbohl , a_f_v_g , goldenboi ect from time to time I was always the outcast as they all liked to talk whilst I killed everyone and everything. I was soon turning into a master killer every shot absolute perfection every movement someone did I knew how to react I finally evented the dodge. Yes believe it or not I invented the dodge I was the first person to use it properly its left, right jump duck forward then back. I only used the assault rifle for a long time that was the only weapon I used, people then came to just say fuck no I want enforcer match not assault rifle mikal is playing. That was how desperate people got they would rather go through a shitty enforcer match than get completely destroyed by my perfect assault rifle skills and they were perfect back then.
Now I think I met most of you guys through these guys mainly the likes of ZZ00M_X who is german. Also I just remembered Fohi3. That guy was my first proper RFG friend mingo and that wanted me too just kill. Fohi3 was a trophy hunter me and him shared almost the exact same skills but sadly like all trophy hunters he left for new games
I eventually got my gold trophy for 100,000xp I could have left but I had good friends on RFG. At the time that was people like tkafitz, mingo ect. They dislike me now and to be honest I don't particularly like them anymore.
Now it was time too really test my skills.
The Biggest Mistake In Virtual History Chapter 6
This is when I was introduced to clans and we'll all be honest when I say all these clans were made within the same week or something it was weird and oh my god I finally found some good players. BLOODLINE: aizen, flameproof, malex and OTS_viperman and Gunwarrior. Back then these guys raped the only player I knew there was flameproof at the time which I usually raped but these guys worked as a team pretty much killed everything including me. 2 days later I met the cHuPaCabrAs . afvg, sanfrangigante , GUMBY and neck shredda. Again I was completely torn apart but I always kept a good reasonable score but fuck I had to react so fast every corner I turned I had to be aware I was like wow there fucking crazy. NEXT week I met K.O.S: The Rickster, Fredster909, foomanchoo(when he was actually good) and Ruffcrew. These guys not as good as the other 2 but kept there cool I could possibly take these guys on by myself but sometimes it's hard when you have retarted blueberrys or someone as crap as mingo on your team who talks about motor bikes all day and lays mines.
It was within this time of month I improved my skills a lot I didn't quit any matches but I soon learn how too deal with 4vs 1 situations and im sure you'd have all seen me get some historic 1vs4 situations and still come out on top with ease. It's what I was most know for back then but yeah haha
Then I met the ELITES and here came the tale of what soon would become the 2 biggest players of RFG but more on that later
Elite's: LK_HELLSPAWN, Paokid, Chaos , ROMAN420. Fucking hell I was gangbanged, raped and torn apart to fucking shreds I don't think I kept a reasonable score line. These guys just assault rifle pistol my whole team left I was on my own I got a few kills but always 4v1 situation and my superb kill everyone around me technique was no fucking use
Now you're probably wandering what the title of the chapter is all about. Well I was like man I want a clan I did not think of my own clan at this point. So I tried Bloodline haha
Mikalhardie says "guys can I join your clan im a very good player you guys know that I really can bring something too your team"
Malex(leader at time) "hell no we can do without you. You will NEVER be at our level, You will never beat one of us, we rule RFG and you are nothing at this game we don't want any more players, your so god damn big headed we don't need a fag like you why don't you make your own clan, think your tough try being a leader faggot Bloodline Own You"
Mikalhardie says "haha"
If I was ever going to rule my virtual world I knew I needed to knock out any rivals. Let the battle commence
Now read the title of the next chapter
THE H@RDIES chapter 7
Oh now I was going to make him eat his words I was going to destroy everything he had on this game but I knew I stood no chance alone especially with aizen at his side. To be fair I wasn't well known at the game at the time but I was beast I was the most underrated player of all time and I was prepared to do anything too change that.
The chupacabras also denied me a chance to play because I wasn't Columbian lol imagine if I set a rule like that but with no Germans allowed haha we wouldn't have a clan. I never tried the other ones and ELITES just skipped my mind (more on that clan later) I decided to make a new clan. My friends list was bare I was hoping to get mingo, djbohl in ect but there stubborn in fact I got a 5 hour lecture on why they didn't want too fucking join LMAO "oh im a mercenary maaaaaaaaaaan" ok whatever just asking. The only one left that I had were Rob and a few other people I considered randoms, in fact I considered Rob a random I didn't even know who he was. But one day my comment box said "beat him down" I had that for a day then I changed it. But about an hour later I noticed Rob's comment box saying "beat him down." I'm like dude you had the same comment box as me. He said something german like haha I know. We started talking for a little bit and he commented about how he thought I was the best player he's even seen on RFG. That was the first time anyone had told me that. I was like really? I wasn't that confident in my ability at the time but yeah I guess it was true I was almost impossible to kill face to face sorry for all the bragging at the moment im just trying too explain how fucking underrated I was and how that made me feel but these were the things I was thinking about at the time.
I thought "hell you know what Rob how about we start a clan". Him being german just said yeah ok mike xD I know it was a good decision to start it with rob he was a really good player at RFG even though at the time he was only yellow I always saw a spark in him. We got talking some more I was like so what should we name the clan. Damn this was challenging we thought of so many names until we just went hey mike I like your 2nd name. I was like yeah it's pretty cool. Then he just said we call ourselves HARDIES. I'm like yeah HARDIES. The @ came in about 2 months later I randomly just put it there and people followed so yeah nothing special about the @ im afraid but it is a damn good symbol no one else uses as soon as I see it my brain overloads with H@RDIENESS.
H@RDIES was probably the best name we could ever have chosen. Its not like other clans calling themselves something game related like Game killers or We kill games dot com lol or whatever crappy names you make up for clans, H@RDIES is a name you know is a gaming clan but yet you know we mean business. They know were different from any clan out there it's an out of the ordinary name it shows we like to think outside of the box.
The clan started at a slow pace it was tough to get quality players me and Rob by ourselves taking on RFG. Was the good times right Rob. I killed everyone whilst he saved my ass that was the old phrase I remember. Before H@RDIES I used to always go like 30-30 I killed everyone whilst dying at the same time but now Rob always watched my back like some sort of slaved dog so I then rarely died. Rob is one of the greatest people I've ever met it's sad to think we are pretty distant these days. Rob you will always be my bud and this clan would not be here if it were not for you, You my friend are German
. And Rob also got the most important kill of H@RDIE history (more on that later haha)
The clan was starting to take place I was bringing in players and when I say players I mean any player were badly needing so we had some useless players like duecevil and cbrocki(CapitalCrusader) we never really got going for a while. . . I needed a player similar too me someone who could follow in my footsteps. I found him all right… he was my clone but like myself he had problems with his life.. the only thing different between us I he doesn't know how to address those problems..
Supa Dupa HeadShoota's Chapter 8
The infamous double team that soon became the core of the early evolution of H@RDIES the double team and the only 2 players that made people think twice about us. It was the master of RFG and his unique apprentice. This was the evolution that got H@RDIES to the top. Mikalhardie and Leon5463 a story with so many similar endings a story of betrayal, forgiveness and friendship, anger (a lot of it) and pure skill. Mostly skill
…And I will tell you there's still plenty more beginnings and endings too follow right leon lol
H@RDIES was very low and very weak I was the only one keeping the spirits up looking for the ultimate breakthrough, and it came. I saw Leon since he was a blueberry I remember training him for months improving his skills along with mine we quickly became so predictable with each other we could almost read each other's minds on the in the battlefield. Everyone knew Leon as some sort of Mikalhardie copy-cat he turned into an almost clone like player. Every bullet, every dodge, every time he opened his mouth it just blazed my name out loudly almost so much it was scary. Every joke every laugh every kill every death we were the same but no one could be the perfect copy.
We soon became the assault rifle masters of our generations. But our first ever 2vs2 was one of the most powerful things you could ever see. This was the day I first met squall and wicked_spyder. I can't remember the match before the 2vs2 but I was by myself and met them too in a match and just managed to win. Then came the hate mail and all the We are RFG's true best players we don't need to play noobish blah blah blah those guys think there so supreme and experienced at RFG that they think they make the rules of the game.
So squall added me as most arguments in the virtual world end up with use being friends for some unexplained reason. Anyway he noticed my comment box it said something like "mikal and leon= best double team." I just put it there because no team had defeated us but we had never been in a 2vs2 match. So squall being squall said 2vs2 and I thought crap.
This was the first time I was about to play anyone in the top 50 face to face I thought these guys were too destroy us and kill us with ease. I didn't know how good I actually was until this day in fact how good WE were. So they invited me, both of them full rank of course. Me I think I was red and 3 stripes by then but leon was yellow 2 stripes I thought there's no way were getting a kill never mind a win. They then put pistols only on puncture. A weapon I have never used on a DLC map I've never used. All odds against us. 2 H@RDIES vs. 2 players 10x our experience. Our first official clan battle (they were a clan by the way or at least that's what they told us)
I remember saying okay leon we are going to lose but we are not going to go out without trying. 3. 2. 1. Match started. All of a sudden I just started playing smart(even though I played smart in every match this was the first time I noticed it) and leon followed they always tried to get leon thinking he was some crap blueberry. Well to be honest he was fucking supposed to be but then he just started raping and I did my usually sneak up from behind and let rip and we just kept counter attacking and it was just kill after kill it was turning into an embarrassment for them I couldn't believe it and neither could leon. I've heard so much about how squall and wicked were supposed to be master class especially with the pistol everyone always said squalls beast with the pistol but one touch of that weapon and we completely obliterated them. Wicked_spyder sent a message saying he's never seen anything like it. Squall said we were playing noobish as always.
From that day H@RDIES went under the command of mikal and Rob and leon as 2nd commands nothing looked capable of stopping us there was no team tactically as clever as me and leon.
The only thing that could halt the clan's potential and uprising was ourselves
…and so it did
The Real loser Gives Up Chapter 9
1 week later our first clan battle was coming up these would soon become known as clan battle Sunday every Sunday all clans got together and fought it out to be for 1 week known as the kings of RFG. 2 days before the first clan battle Sunday bloodline said 4vs4 just a friendly I said ok let's roll why not. So I Leon, Rob and some crappy clan member we had back then went face to face for the first time. I wanted too so badly kick the hell out of malex even if it was a practise match. So bang kick off sand pit assault rifle only but some weapons left on. From the start they camped at the rail driver and they were getting kills in very fast, everything we tried just was not good enough but there was still hope the score was 31-14 and that was when Leon decided to quit the game and leave us stranded. The rest of us carried the game out as H@RDIES and left without embarrassing ourselves too much
Leon then sent me a message telling me. Bloodlines are better they work as a team and told me how useless the clan was and decided to leave for bloodline.
So he did
Sunday came me just drained almost out of words me and Rob capital and duecevil we turned up we were not walking away.
We were defeated by all clans by quite a lot I took the hate mail, all the loser messages all the "is that even a clan messages."
But too see leon celebrating when he did nothing to help that clan he just turned up and decided I'll play for use using my own skills against me. Is what hurt most.
I felt like everything was too waste I had too question myself why the fucking hell am I doing this. All clan leaders ask themselves this, only I found a good answer.
This is the part of the story I tell you guys the real purpose of joining the clan and I mean the real purpose. The whole Idea of a clan is to be number 1. We all joined the clan for the same ambition. Too be better than the others too show through hard work and loyalty one clan can be the best. Something that you know belongs to you and that you helped it achieve something spectacular. This is what makes H@RDIES special and this is why I am a much superior leader to any other clan on bloodline. Bloodline, Elite , chupacabras ect were so full of themselves they were so used to winning but every clan I have ever faced, And I mean every single one as soon as they get there first loss and they realise they are not number 1 they quit, they vanish they say clans are useless they say they now hate clans. They say it starts arguments
But us H@RDIES no we don't. That day I could of just said its over guys we can never make it. Leon is gone our 2nd best player and everyone else is never online or are just bad. No I stood by and I said guys we can do this you just need too stick by we will improve we will get better , WE ARE A CLAN , we'll show them the true meaning of a clan because H@RDIES never quit. From that day I knew I can take this clan far because the guys who did stick with me after that day are still here. Lol just ROB HAHA. But I knew he would be here until the end he's the one guy who really did believe in me.
And leon your right we didn't work as a team and bloodline were better.
But the point of joining a clan is too improve it and too keeps improving until we are number 1. The best part of the clan is the journey too number 1. And I think you still regret too this day that you missed the majority of that journey
Malex then sent me a message saying you lose like I told you.
I replied" malex I ALWAYS WIN… BECAUSE I MAKE SURE I HAVE NOTHING TOO LOSE"
That's always been my motto don't think I ever added the 2nd part been keeping it secret for this but that quote sums up me and H@RDIES
We will keep on winning until I decide we lose.. only I can decide when we lose
Send in the germans!!! Chapter 9
Yes this is when H@RDIES started too shine, This is the period that made all the big clans go ohno. And who do we have to thank. Yes it's the Germans. We finally got our break through when we got ZZ00M_X in I think I have Rob to thank I don't think me and ZZ00M_X saw eye to eye at the time(assuming Germans have eyes) with ZZ00M_X I felt we had the ability to take on anyone. But also with ZZ00M_X half of fucking Germany followed and if they weren't german they spoke german and acted german. I'm talking about marxus who just returned at the time I asked him to join, blodyinstict, dark-black-star, schlitzer and about 20 other Germans man most came and went but it didn't matter confidence was high. Then we got the French wanting to join. Diabolik and nagato73 the best French duo on that game by far. But with ZZ00M_X saw the final departure of leon. I had managed to convince leon too re-join. Romantic speech I believe did the trick
ZZ00M was eying that 2nd command position normally I would of said no leon is doing fine but I knew leon wanted to re-join bloodline so badly I felt like I sort of forced him to join. I knew whether ZZ00M_X won or lost he was gone so I let the match go on. Man I would let ZZ00M_X tell you the match but it was epic. Best match I ever spectated and usually I don't watch spectated matches. But it wasn't the clan command position they were fighting for, They were fighting each other. Both of them hated the guts out of each other both of them were going at it like crazy it was kill after kill and it finally went to 19-19 and I was spectating and was like holy fuck next kill win it was unbearable too watch then guess what...disconnecting. . . lol I was like fuck sake that was tense to watch and as expected they argued both trying to find out who quit or whatever but I believe it was leon because ZZ00M_X is a no non-sense type of person who really is not a quitter no matter the situation and as predicted leon said he didn't care and that he would leave for bloodline. To be honest I think it was more of him trying to make me angry or something. He still is trying to get a win over me but it always ends with me making him look like an idiot again. Thinking he will use my training to his advantage to destroy me. And look where that got him. COD. << were every loser who ever tried to beat me went.
Next we had a few fantastic weeks of matchmaking we looked good. Most clans were quiet for a few weeks and then I got that message from malex telling me this Sunday is another clan battle week. This time I knew we stood a chance. Me ZZ00M_X, Rob-_-Devil and blodyinstict looked like quite a team but we needed a 5th(yes 5vs5 were clan rule regulations.) Then I found our man.
Join date
Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Fri Mar 11, 2011 5:06 pm
The Flame that Always burns Chapter 11
Flameproof. What a guy. Always stoned. Always there. Always determined for more but sometimes just wants too much.
Flameproof had arguments with malex over rules. Oh man I remember this. Oh this was funny listen. Leon left our clan and was like me and bloodline is going to kick your ass you haven't seen the last of Leon ect. He then went to bloodline and they rejected him because he quit there clan before LMAO. Oh I wish I saw his face when that happened. He then returned here and was like can I re-join and I'm like haha I think I laughed for about 2 hours and then just said no fuck off haha.
So flameproof raged quit he had nothing. Me being as nice as I am said "join us. We will show you the true meaning of revenge." Flameproof maybe always misunderstood by most but I always understood him. Yeah I understood he was always stoned out of face and talked crap all day. Oh wait did we all know that. Anyway I saw no problem he was not really a trouble maker. Well aside from the fact everyone in RFG hated him apart from us. But that got us attention. People hated flame and I mean just everyone hated him but he is a good guy just has his way of going about his business Flameproof is a true rebel he stands for what he believes in and never gives up I've always admired him for that. But the one thing that lets him down is his stupidity. He achieved so much in helping us build the clan but in the end he never truly felt it was his to achieve. Hard man to please
The Battle of RFG Chapter 12
What can I say about this day? Anyone who was there will agree they will never experience a battle like this ever again. It had everything tension, quality, supreme amount of pressure but most of all for me this was mikal vs aizen. So much talk between me and aizen everyone knew it was down to how we played that would ultimately decide who the king of RFG is. Of course there was LK but hadn't heard of him for a month. Aizen vs. mikal it was always us 2. Everyone knew who played better out of the 2 of us would have a massive advantage in winning. No one knew 2 better people with an assault rifle. I swore on that day all I need to do is play better than him and the clan should play by itself I had confidence that ZZ00M_X, rob , flame and bloodyinstinct could take care of malex, OTS_Viperman, gunwarrior and Squall(yes he was bloodline.)
Aizen was one of those players able to take out clans all by himself. It was up to me to not let that happen this to us this was the day I had to prove that I truly am the greatest RFG player of all time and that I am the Ruler of the Greatest Clan that ever lived. I had my team talk before it was quite emotional. this battle was really really hyped about. People who didn't care about clans wanted to know the score line. So I took my team into a chat room I said some things. Most didn't understand because they were german, stoned or just couldn't be assed. But I said "im fed up of giving good performances without the end result, guys we really can win this all we need is that kill from someone, one kill can make the difference we really are better than these guys, We are H@RDIES We are supreme We will not be beaten unless we give up, and true H@RDIES never give up, we shall pick up our guns we will take on last deep breath and we fight. And we forever will ALWAYS WIN."
The rules were simple. It was pistol and assault rifle only backpacks were jetpack and there were few other weapons like nano-rifle, gauss rifle and grinder. 3 games we only needed 2 wins.
Ok here we go. I probably was taking this more serious than the other clan members you would have to ask them that but I was taking this ultra-serious. I was fed up failing at finding something meaningful in reality and I am not going to let anyone beat me in this world. Because when you lose virtually it's statistically recorded you just can't hide it.
Game 1. 3,2,1. This was crazy it was H@RDIES 4-0 then it was 8-8 we were neck and neck me and aizen just kept killing each other we both were going 20-20 near the end me and aizen just let rip on each other. I saw ZZ00M and flame and the rest shooting like crazy, like they wanted to do it for each other, some wanted to do it for me, some did it for their own personal revenge, Everyone had a reason to win no one wanted to let the team down, some got stressed that they were playing bad but they stuck at it too the end and in the end score was 59-57 to bloodline we need 3 straight kills to win I remember I was in a 1vs2 situation with malex and aizen and was like fuck I am not going to lose this for the clan I went straight for aizen first bang super-fast assault rifle headshot turned and before malex even pressed the R1 button I had already changed to the pistol and straight kill in the face it was now 59-59 and oh boy guys it was fucking tense I was sweating like a frecking swimming pool.
What happened next was out of my power I just crouched hid in a corner and hoped my clan members could pull something of .I didn't know what was happening it was silent for about 15 seconds and then I heard one sniper shot. 1 BULLET and I knew only one person could be firing that sniper and that man's name was Rob-_-DeViL. BANG headshot on viperman from miles out and I don't know about you but I celebrated with a somewhat football like YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!!!. Rob your german but you're a fucking god with that kill if you did not get that shot we would be RFG's 2nd best clan and that is unbearable too even think of.
So 60-59 to H@RDIES an incredible game but the thought we had to do it all over again was unthinkable. We went straight into the next match it I couldn't give my team a good thank you for that match but I will do it now. You guys played like legends. You may look at players like ZZ00M , me and flame as gods of RFG at the moment but at the time we were extremely under-rated
All the talk was about how bloodline was going to destroy us. Whether we were going to lose the next 2 games we showed them we are not push-overs.
2nd game. Well it was a disaster as soon as the game started ZZ00M, Rob and bloody disconnected me and flame vs. 5 of these players, Flame if your reading this we put up one hell of a fight but once the buildings were down they were just taking cheap ass long shots and we lost 60-51. Bloodline being stubborn was like yeah we fucking destroyed use. I'm like ok let's just do this final game lets truly end this.
Yeah you destroyed us but you DIDN'T destroy all of us fucking idiots
Now the game that would decide all RFG's gamer's fate
This was the game I became RFG's number 1 and have never moved from that position next what happened next is what we like to call. "H@RDIE TIME"
My clan had a sense of belief we knew could do it we knew that through hard work and belief this clan go far. We could become Red Faction: Guerrilla's greatest clan of all time
3, 2, 1. Bang, boom and then KA-POW we showed them exactly what were capable of. This match went up to 80 kills and we just took them by surprise. I took out aizen 100% ZZ00M and the rest were outstanding. Malex only got 2 kills in the entire match the whole of RFG stood by as I took the match by storm and how we looked as all this hard training was paying off. Rob getting vital kills with the dodge, ZZ00M getting perfect nano rifle hits as we practised for weeks with it and flameproof letting all that vengeance out and bloody tearing them in half with a grinder We were fucking freaks that day everything we did in the most important battle of our life's went right it was a complete destruction of bloodline. I got nearly ¾ of the kills. I remember ZZ00M said something after the match I don't know what he said but I could see we finally understood each other he wasn't a fan of clans but we showed him. RFG from that day was never the same. Bloodline completely left the game after that they gave up as I explained earlier, los chupacabras just left they thought oh fuck that. K.O.S vanished without a trace but we took a few of their members
They saw something in us that they knew they knew they would never have and that was Germans and a leader. Malex quoted me as the "Virtual Hitler" that day everyone knew we had created something truly remarkable. A clan that never dies without my say so. A Clan capable of anything. A true Clan of loyalty, determination and sheer willpower.
Now only 1 thing stood in our way too complete glory. . .
The ELITE happiness Chapter 13
It was Hard work vs. technical ability it was belief vs. confidence it was mikalhardie vs. LK_HellSpawn it was H@RDIES VS ELITES. One might say this was the start of 2 of the greatest fighters in the virtual world.
I must admit they were good nearly every 4vs4 we were taking care of pretty easy but in a 1vs1 or 2vs2 H@RDIES won most of them mainly due to the fact that no one in the clan was at my level yet and I could deal with 2 people at the same time.
LK_HellSpawn. The kid who lost it all.
I and he did more arguing than we did battling our rivalry was so huge it was beyond unthinkable. LK with the more powerful clan but me with the better individual skill. It was always going to be Mind Vs Skill (who had which only you can decide.)
Before I met LK he was all rumour. Most known phrase was "he's a fucking dickhead but he's the best on PS3." From hearing that phrase I always had my mind set on changing it.
He was my biggest challenge yet mentally and physically I had to remain 100%. Every bullet had to count every kill on him meant getting closer to him being slightly worried.
My clan always had the mental ability to cope but LK always had better players and that was frustrating he simply just went straight to the big guns of RFG and asked for a helping hand. We maybe stood a chance with our best players but ZZ00M was never there and the rest were always A.W.O.L I was using the likes of DrRedeye and goobar in their youth days. It felt like the clan was slipping I always felt like a 1 man clan.
I remember my 1st 1v1 with him. I remember fearing him yet I always had confidence. I don't think he even knew the ability I had but the likes of Paokid will tell that he never ever won a serious 1vs1 with me, because I knew how to deal with LK. In real life I was able to predict people within seconds I can almost read what they're thinking I can almost read their past all from a look into an eye.
I can feel extreme levels of fear in him even though he never showed it, like he's waiting for something, He was looking for guidance I can sense it all he was running an almost 200 man clan and had no clue how much he had gotten himself into. My 1vs1 tactics were simple. To wait longer than he did too test how long he would wait for the thing he fears. It frustrated him so badly it affected his performance and then KA-POW striked him when it hurt, when he least expected it.
I always spoke to him like I was bigger like I was more intelligent. I made him feel so small and weak and yet he still found a way to come through he was different, he was weak but the strongest type of weak.
These battles continued for months we battled so frequently that one of us were just so tired of fighting. . .
. .That was me
THE GREATEST H@RDIE TO EVER DIE Chapter 14
H@RDIES darkest days for sure. It wasn't just me vs. LK it was me vs. Elites The clan was just not clicking and at the time we were just another clan I never thought of it differently this was back when I was nice and cheerful to everyone and everyone joined the damn clan because I was a good boy version of LK or something. The clan if not dead was dying fast I had no active pro's whatsoever. The man who saved the clan was not the greatest of players but he showed me that he believed in me, he knew I can achieve so much I just needed to push on.
Tupac-55. I picked him up as he was somewhat a stray dog. Flameproof was out of the clan and started his H@RDIE rebellion group known as the Warriors which stole half of my fucking clan by the way and still failed against me.
Tupac-55 knew flame in real life they were best friends. Tupac had failed the test he had to do for warriors to get intothe clan but gunwarrior who was the leader didn't know tupac was flames real life friend. Tupac was lost for a day. I met him in team anarchy the guy had a very good shot with the assault rifle I thought he has real potential here. I offered him the opportunity to join H@RDIES but flame had asked at the same time but Tupac amazingly rejected flame and simply said referring to me "there's something about this kid flame that your clan will never have and that's the ability to lead, too stand out, to risk everything he's got for what he believes in."
He joined H@RDIES the same day I sort of quit.. all the pressure and stress piling on me I couldn't find a reason for all the work I did for the clan when it made no effect as the clan members didn't care and it finally got in my head and asked that question we ask ourselves everyday of our life. Why the hell should I care anymore?
All the clan members left, H@RDIES was all but dead warriors too what was the remains. I was blamed a lot for that day I left but all I felt was the upmost rage I was the one who did and does everything and I never ever got one fucking thank you ,not one that's all I needed just one god damn thank you Michael I really do fucking appreciate you sorting out this clan and running it fucking smoothly whilst I do nothing but simply play the game like im ordered to do.
Like I said the only thing capable of destroying us were ourselves and so it did
But Tupac was different
he stayed he said im a H@RDIE and I will play and serve until I die you mikal picked me up when no one else did and I will fight for your name until it's virtually impossible.
I simply said thank you
But that day changed me. Like life I was following the rules that we were told to obey when were born but I was following MY god damn rules this time and I still was getting fucking nowhere.
The cheerful little nice boy was fading fast people might forget how I used to be but probably the person who is likely to remember the effect is Paokid. At first I treated him like some god because he was simply nice I felt sorry for him as LK treated him like shit yet he stuck with his master until he was gone.
Now were on very dividing terms I feel the need to pick on him but yet at the same time pick him up when it matters most.
Tuppac-55 is my greatest H@RDIE of all time and he's the only reason I don't ever lose my mind controlling the clan these days becuace believe me as cool as I sound as smooth as I seem and I may have an answer for any question you ask me im only human its fucking stressful being a leader.
Tupac-55 served the clan until he ran out of money for food that he actually had to sell his PS3. I've never met a more loyal player and I so badly would like to see him.
recently he was in a real bad shape before he left for good.
This is why I love this clan He reminded me why im actually doing this. Tupac was crying almost every day from starvation, past problems and all he had was H@RDIES and I helped him when no else would.
As much as you guys think your worth to the clan but the sad truth is no one in the clan at the moment would go what he went through just too see us succeed. And I swore that I will accomplish our dream. This is why I will never live life. A man like tupac-55who deserved it all but life as usual throws it all back in his face.
Life simply doesn't like nice guys
Tupac-55 is a H@RDIE
The one who could be PERFECTION Chapter 14.5
..So much potential, so much alike and in the end to much potential to waste
When I first started bringing players into the clan, all these young players coming and going I always thought at least one will rise to the end just that one player who could do it all and achieve so much.
Naxonax was my main project the person I saw with the most potential I saw him shine through players like Diabolik and marxus he was the one I kept a close eye on I knew from the first moment he was to be a star but I was never going to let him feel that way… yet
You were just another soldier of RFG. This clan has a lot of soldiers including the likes of FDP and goobar and sacred. They were all soldiers but there was this roaring flame I could feel inside of you this this glimmer in the eye. You were more than a soldier you were a super-soldier. Better than all the rest, quicker than all the rest. He was the perfect package. But then I remembered so was leon.
Perfect packages are great gifts but it's how you open the package that matters most. Leon I just unleashed from the beginning and let him wreck hell on everyone. But then he thought he was powerful too early on he thought "hold on a minute I can do better than this small-time clan." With nax I kept him in a dark corner for a long time alongside Diabolik and goobar but I knew he would shine through all he had to do was not only prove me that he can be the best but to also prove himself that he can become perfection. When I first met him he told me one very important thing he said.. "Mikal, can you help me with my assault rifle and pistol skills." ..Yes that was important no one else ever asked everyone else just said we will never be as good as you mikal so what's the point in even trying.. Nax wanted to improve he wanted to be better than the level of skill he already was. And from there on I dropped a few hints there and there and he got better and better and better.
Nax was not only becoming a great player he was also gaining something most others never got and that was respect, everyone respected nax for what he was and what he was soon to become.
You know what. Im going to stop talking about his skills.
Im going to stop because his skills never mattered and never did and probably never will. Everyone respected nax, even me. And I've never respected someone before. And when you respect someone you listen to that person closer than you do to others, you take their advice and you use it. I thought of naxonax as my friend I felt like he listened to me and always felt like someone to talk too. For sure im sounding like the crazy lonely freak that I am. For once in my life I had someone I can let my mind go free with.
Wherever I went he followed. When we joined forces with LK he was the only one who followed me when I made this decision along with the soon re-arrival of leon. The 2 darkest shadows side by side of me. Too me there is nothing more important than having those 2 guys being next to me. It makes things a lot less complicated and a lot easier.
Naxonax like me and leon is a lone warrior who somehow caught himself in a clan. Naxonax could become the greatest warrior we ever had. The only big thing stopping him from doing this is himself. Everyone believes in him but himself. Sometimes the pressure, the expectation, sometimes the belief itself is just too much for him to take. Whether he will ever be able to cope with what we expect him to do we will never know?
My biggest regret with nax was the fact I never got the chance to unleash him he was never around when the clan battling was really taking place. The day naxonax will finally be unleashed the day he can be released from his cage to throw the anger into others… will be the greatest day of this clans history… I don't know when and I don't know how but to unleash the nightmare of such an individual on a full clan… is the day we finally win.
Last edited by mikalhardie on Mon May 23, 2011 3:58 pm; edited 1 time in total
Join date
Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Fri Mar 11, 2011 5:08 pm
The Rising H@RDIE
..So much potential, so much alike and in the end so much talent too waste.
When I first started bringing players into the clan, all these young players coming and going I always thought at least one will rise to the end. I've had to edit this part of the story as I was wrong.
Naxonax was my main project the person I saw with the most potential I saw him shine through players like Diabolik and marxus he was the one I kept a close eye on I knew from the first moment he was to be a star but I was never going to let him feel that way… yet
He was supposed to be the closest thing to me. Maybe I tried to hard trying to make him see sense or maybe I was wrong maybe he was just never to be maybe he was never the person I thought he was.
I was going to change your life for the good nax but you just could not see it. I had a huge chapter ready to be written about you. But if im not worth your god damn so called precious time then you're not worth mine now I have a fucking god damn magnificent clan to talk about and you're not part of it and I can't see how you effected any decision I made in the clan so I'll leave you out until possibly the end
The Day We Killed RFG Chapter 15
"Imagine creating something that could kill an entire game within seconds, to make the point of playing a game feel so pointless"
Red Faction: Guerrilla Never died out of Skill, It didn't die out of noobs ruining the game, Red Faction:Guerilla Died out of FEAR.
Mikalhardie and LK_HellSpawn were the most feared INDIVIDUALS of RFG. No one would ever think we had anything in common and we didn't, well not really. But one day our heads got the better of ourselves. We thought of something that could make RFG crumble within seconds and oh my the imagination was terrifying
The day mikalhardie and LK_HellSpawn made the biggest most terrifying alliance of all time.
The funny thing is I never needed LK but he needed me. People always wondered how the hell we made a team together. The simple fact was he asked me. Yes one day I knew the pressure, the feeling that every morning he had to wake up to me shooting the crap out of him and he had to try and put on a show. Winning those days meant so much too us we went through extraordinary lengths to win the most ridiculous of matches.
He came to me his exact words were "Ok mikal you need some decent players and I seriously need a guy who can kick-ass and sort the clan out because these players keep coming and going and it annoys me that your clan seems so stable whilst mine is always great but I can't get it under control I can't seem to get the clan to go forward, so I'm asking for help unbelievably. Do not laugh please." Lol I did laugh by the way. It felt like a victory, it felt like I had beaten him. But I had to stop laughing because then it hit me. The feeling that everyone on RFG could just say "OH FUCK" and everyone on one game could just give a moments silence
the feeling that I could be invincible.
That was the day HellForce became a bigger name than RFG itself. But the battle of me and LK would still continue until one final standstill, But first some Team HellSpawn pawning.
The RFG Clear-out Chapter 16
When HellForce was born no one was safe I remember we had over 100 members. RFG was burning very fast.
Chupacabras= Torn apart they never accepted a custom but we caught them so many times in MM that they eventually gave up and fled like the cowards they were.
K.O.S= Gone without a Trace as soon as Hellforce was born they were no were too be seen. We got Fredster who was there only decent player but even he didn't know what happened to this clan he said they just disappeared.
It was actually quite scary how K.O.S just vanished without a trace apart from fredster who's just too retarded to know anything around him
Bloodline= half of them joined us. The rest quit. So much potential, so much hope. Crushed and im proud to say the true H@RDIE clan did this and not HellForce.
Other clans emerged from nowhere they were taking cared of within seconds. Leon had re-joined me and my clan for what would be the strongest force in RFG. Mikalhardie, LK_HellSpawn, Paokid, naxonax, ZZ00M_X, Leon, F-12 and many more the list went on. Every clan we destroyed a few followed.
I remember the Warriors. Flameproof and Gunwarrior. They took quite a hit but I liked there style I can tell flame learned from me and his mistakes at bloodline. They tried to withstand but they never won. They tried and failed. Both then left for red dead.
I started to realise that we were making people quit RFG every time we played a team they just gave up. HellForce was a very dark side and even though it may be known as H@RDIES at the moment it still is a very good side with a very dark mystery.
"The fear of our clan is far Greater than our skill"
HellForce was the greatest side who ever roamed the depths of Red Faction. Now only 2 clans stood between us and ultimate glory. Here came the most skilled games of our life's, must remain focused, must stay in control, must not ever let them think we will lose.
..And then they fall Chapter 17
Gingers and Fish Fuckers led RFG's last resistance they both made some sort of alliance. This was HellForce vs. Gamefanatic, wicked_spyder, squall, Shikari, buffalowing, Danggster, im_greatness_7 and nearly the entire of RFG's so called pro's all of them top 16 on leader boards. We were supposed to be the underdogs. We then had many battles, and I mean many. But we only had 1 true clan battle 4vs4 only 1.
Leon5463 & Paokid are left in the clan too tell the story. But the other ones in the greatest 4vs4 team of all time were LK and me. You might think I doubt that's the best. Think about it. LK and Paokid one of the greatest double teams they knew each other's actions on and off the battlefield and me and leon. Well must I say anymore? When it came too double teams there was no better match than those 2. Now they were together. We were up against tough opposition there official team was Shikari, Danggster, buffalowing and im_greatness_7. Our first and only true 4vs4 and we all agreed this is it.
There was no turning back. It was a straight first too 2 wins. Everything I worked for coming down for a final showdown. The showdown I could only dream of getting too. Seriously when I inserted my RFG disc for the first time and played multiplayer I did not expect to get this far. At the start I only dreamed of being able to play with the best. But I was doing better than playing with them. I had a chance to play against them and I had a chance of winning. For once in my life I was succeeding and it felt good. But I was going to do my best to make sure there's a happy ending. Everyone deserves a happy ending even a guy as weird and as me. Although I never knew at the time that this was just the beginning… none of us did
Ok first game crash site pistol and assault rifle no bullshit. First game we lost by 2 kills we let the pressure get too us me and leon just being our frustrated self's shouting and swearing at some fat American's through the TV. LK and Paokid crying like girls.
I knew I had to control my anger and frustration or we were never going to win the other 3 in there team also had to face there strongest weakness. Mine was my anger, my frustration and my ability to act like a complete dickhead to my team mates because we were losing.
2nd game Downfall same rules. I don't remember much all I know it was Game Over for them. We got our head's straight and they just never stood a single chance. I and LK just transformed into machines and everyone knew if me and him could perform well we could beat any team regardless of whoever else was in our team. That's not too say that leon and Paokid did a bad job in fact I think it was leon who got the highest score in that 2nd match. I think he was our worst player in the 1st game he was -10 or something.
Have to say well done leon for once you didn't just completely give up out of anger and frustration for once you stood by and fought your weakness and we won but that was the day I think you really did show you had the potential to be as good as anyone.
And Paokid, well he was just Paokid. That kid never ever does anything special on the battlefield but he also NEVER puts in a horrible performance against the big teams, always performs when it matters.
The 3rd game well is it even worth mentioning in we had about 9 games after that as they kept trying to win a match on quarantine minus the buildings. Haha They just kept getting blown apart in the open it proves face to face there is no team better than us, absolutely none. Seriously Danggster looked a bit lost without his fucking house on crash site.
Who Am I Chapter 18
You're probably reading this and wandering why I actually have not spoken about myself yet. Who is mikalhardie? Up to this point I've been known as a psychopathic freak, or some sad loser with no life. I'm known for my dangerous qualities of twisting minds and destroying clans throughout the virtual world.
Nobody really knows me. Sometimes I don't even know who I am all I can say is I am all an act. In truth there really is no mikalhardie I act differently depending on who I'm talking too. I lie numerous amounts of times just for the slightest of changes into the clan
For example I lied about my brother dying in the war to get ZZ00M_X to re-join I lie a lot but I never ever lie for my own benefit everything I will lie about is for the benefit of the clan. Anything I told you that seems to have nothing to do with the clan is probably the truth.
Sometimes the truth can be found against me and then I admit my mistake of lying but whilst apologising I will lie over the apology of lying. It's a technique that always works
Im known for my quick fired answers that leave your brain puzzled for on how to reply. I ask questions that are sometimes unanswerable.
Well that's just me I like to know people's strengths and weaknesses. I have my way of getting people to tell me things so personal that they really shouldn't tell me. I'm extremely un-trust worth any secrets you have you really shouldn't tell me but I'll get you too tell me anyway.
Because I can simply connect too anyone, everyone feels like telling me everything.
My appearance. Well after sending tonnes of pictures of random people to make use believes im just some cool kid I finally felt yeah ok time to show my real appearance. Yeah it's the scariest thing about me.
Not the appearance itself but the fact you're looking at me and you're thinking what?
You all thought well he's probably one of those leader types looking people he's probably got one of those cool scars going down the eyebrow or something.
But not im just another fat kid with a chubby face right. Well im not your ordinary chubby kid am i? My smile probably the fakest smile you'll ever see. I'm known in reality for a very scary elusive stare but I don't think you guys will ever see that. How could all these thoughts be going through a fat kids mind just how?
My humour well that's a side that I do like because that really is just me I like laughing at anything really. I like the straight down to earth dark humour and Germans.
So my personality is a cross-fire of silly laughs, lies, dark secrets and seeing things before other people see things.
"You people really shouldn't trust me, but you just can't help but trust"
Onto relationships. Friends well don't have but hoping to move too America or whatever. Scotland is very low on gamers everyone here is either in jail, on drugs or one of those crazy gothic gay camp people and there's me haha yeah I don't fit in Scotland I wouldn't mind someone to talk to other than myself but it works. I want to go travelling and visit everyone in the clan all the Germans all the people that I work hard for. Especially sweet because I would so tap that
And that brings us onto girls
Now I've probably told use all I've been in a couple of relationships ect and you all think yeah ok fat man whatever haha. Im just good with girls for obvious reasons it is never a love at first sight when these girls see me but I have my ways. My humour and mystery give them a sense of adventure and im very good listener and im never afraid to go straight in for the vagina. In truth girls are just fun for me I've never really felt love. I've never felt like someone could truly love me for who I am. Sometimes I think I'm in love but I snap my brain out of it.
I hate Scotland I need to get out of here so fast. Every day I trap myself in my room I never leave these walls around me feel like there closing in closer day by day until one day I feel I must break them down and free myself.
Am I a smart kid? Now that is a very difficult question. I always look smarter than everyone else I always have that word or that weird structures in a sentence that make me seem so much better than anyone else.
I'm a smart learner I know almost anything about life itself. Im smart it's just everything I know is pretty pointless and unnecessary.
"I can see the world for what it really is and that makes me a very dangerous person"
Speeches. Probably my most known aspect, how do I do? Well I use big words I use sentences used to send shock through your brains to get you motivated. My speeches are getting better and better almost becoming deadly…
I also have this ability to think so far out of the box, too deal with painful emotions within seconds, too feel no feeling apart from happiness
So im Michael Hardie im the kid who got unlucky, I'm that nice kid who followed the rules the world had given us and was never rewarded, now I'm going to change that, the thing that makes myself dangerous is the fact I don't know if this Is a rescue mission or vengeance. Maybe I will never know until all the pieces come together.
"You Know When you've Been KA-POWED" Chapter 19
After the final battle of Red Faction Guerrilla
After everything was won
After we single handily took over RFG
It was only a matter of time until someone's patience was too expire this is when Red Faction turned into a complete death zone no one came in and out without a complete pawnage by one of our 100 man army of supreme soldiers.
This is when the wait for RFA began and were still waiting, these entire epic battles all these magnificent moments. This was by far my toughest task yet keeping a clan together for almost a year.
LK was definitely not going to help the amount of times that kid just pissed me off was unreal, the amount of times he disobeyed my decisions and just talked over. This 50-50 leadership was not going too last.
I had to end. I knew LK was too strong for me just too tear apart mentally so I had to do it the hard way a straight 1vs1 for the leadership of the clan.
I'm glad I was going to do this the entire clan was fed up of LK's bullshit. Everyone who came across the clan either praised the fuck out of LK or said oh look it's one of LK's crew "fuck use" and everyone was so frustrated especially me I did fucking everything I was the guy in the background making sure the clan doesn't fall apart out of anger at LK.
For most the time I was smart enough just to ignore and deal with the frustration of him over-ruling some of my decisions but he took one decision too far. I was a ticking bomb I could explode just any minute, you can only push a guy like me so far until I eventually will just say I've had enough and let out all the anger. Like the day I nearly killed that kid when I was younger it was time I stood up for myself and showed who truly is the King of the Virtual world.
It all started with LK deciding to replace Paokid with poffder as 2nd command and that really pissed me of I was so angry I think my exact words to LK were "Paokid is the only reason your still fucking here. He's the only reason I god damn agreed to create HellForce with you Paokid is goddamn twice the person you'll ever be and 100x the person poffder ever was"
I think LK's excuse for replacing Paokid was because poffder has been in the clan longer but so fuck that's like me replacing Sulphury with falaa!!.
Ok I may treat Paokid like shit but he is the perfect example of what I want the world to be like. Ok maybe a bit more intelligent and less black but he's a nice kid and LK treated him the way that the world treated me. Treated us like shit even though we did everything we possibly could. I was not letting Paokid go through the same shit I had to go through growing up (and yes I sort of just compared LK to god but yeah you see the comparison)
So the match was nearing we had a week to practise but LK being the over confident big headed prick that he was decided not to train that entire week until that day. I think the majority wanted me to win. The only person I remember wanting LK too win was a few of his individual friends and O-Skie
I remember 12 people spectated this match nearly everyone's comment boxes were MH-_-KA-POW vs. LK_HellSpawn.
So much hope, so much rivalry coming down to the most important day of H@RDIENESS ever. Ok you guys might not think it wasn't that important now but imagine if he had won. Imagine if I never existed. Where would we be? Would gaming ever feel the same? Everyone was worried that day
Some people were so nervous like nax and worried. this could be the end other people like leon were pumped up and ready taunting LK as we were too battle.
And I will tell you I have never felt tension and nervousness as this and I doubt I ever will again all the training I had done was out the window my body would just not stop shaking
Oh the tension, the tension was just agony it was crushing and this was before the game had even started.
If anyone saw the game then you truly know the meaning of destruction. LK went 3-20 or something. He simply gave up he knew he could never really beat me in a 1vs1 or maybe it was the fact he saw sense and noticed that I wanted the clan more than him and that I deserved to lead the clan too true glory.
I even offered him the chance to stay but too not lead and everyone looked for his answer and he was just too stubborn too say yes. That was the death of what was supposed to be Red Faction Guerrillas best player. Mikalhardie had finally won. I frecking won Red Faction Guerrilla was my game I am the true master and I have these epic moments and battles in my head to remind me very day that no one will ever experience the journey I went too be the best
And you guys helped a lot and I thank all of you.
..Oh not to forget to mention I made Paokid 2nd command and he kicked poffder out the clan lol epic.
You Have to Beat the Best to Be the Best chapter 20
With LK gone it was up to me to pick up the pieces unfortunately this cast a huge dark shadow over me. Up to this point everyone in RFG respected me as that kid who's good at gaming but is not an asshole. I wasn't good I was the best LK got that respect of being the best by acting like the biggest dick head ever. I decided this clan was to become ours. By that I mean I want this clan to be liked by no one but ourselves. I was making sure I that everyone knew I was in charge and I was no longer some quiet fucking push-over.
Nearly everyone left from LK's side of the clan apart from O-Skie who said "what you did too LK was unbelievable I always thought he was unbeatable. I now fight by your side." I liked that in O-Skie he's a general all round nice cool guy who will do things first time. Same goes for players like FDP, goobar ect these are the guys that bring the clan together.
They never seem like much but they are what I call soldiers they do all the dirty work without any complaints so seriously guys although I may never write an epic speech to keep you in the clan or play with use 24/7 I never forget the effort, loyalty and commitment you guys show. You are the people I made this clan for. People like Moofs who we can all see he probably had a shit life but he keeps smiling like the rest of us he gets on with it. He was never rewarded and that's what I intend to do. You guy really are what I call H@RDIES.
Days were turning too weeks, weeks were turning too months but us H@RDIES we stuck at it not giving up we badly needed a fresh player, a player worth talking about, a player worth bragging about.
In comes the saviour of the year Sulphury. Yes some says he's big headed, some say he's a complete dickhead but guess what, HE's OUR COMPLETE BIG HEADED DICKHEAD!!! And I wouldn't have it any other day. Finally I found a gamer in our clan just somebody who whilst being having a no non-sense attitude is still not afraid to voice his opinion. I found a player that I didn't have to do anything with he was the full package. He shoots at the head YES oh my skill that is supposedly hard to master and he could do it with ease.
Did I like him at first Hell no mainly because he could beat me playing at his best but sadly these players who make me throw my controller out of the window are the players we need if you make me angry then you know you're either really good or a fucking noob.
Don't know much about sulphury's personal life and don't really want to know were just business and customizable ostriches I like to keep it that way.
The thing is Sulphury could of joined a long time ago if he actually played good in the 2 matches that I saw of him lol both clan battles but he didn't even know he was in a clan battle. First one me and leon get our sup dupa boots on and raped him and flame in a Warrior vs. HellForce 2vs2 then about week before he joined the clan Shikari brought him in for a 2vs2 and Sulphury wall shot crazy yes Sulphury wall shot and still failed LOL
He was on my friends list for a long time im surprised we didn't delete each other maybe it was the fact I saw he never play COD that's usually the 1st sign of deletion usually if im looking too delete someone the big spamming call of duty which spams the whole thing under your name is just asking for deletion.
Some things in life are just simple and that's the perfect essence of Sulphury I just asked out of the blue to join the clan and he said yes and he was good and that's that. Sulphury I our ultimate weapon it's a shame I haven't been able to unleash him on some proper opposition but his time will come im sure.
HAPPYdepression chapter 21
Arguments, mystery, Germans and supposedly lies. Some were and some were not
All started with an announcement. I told everyone I was giving up gaming for the time being as I will be beginning college and wanted to get a good education and succeed at life. That is true I was going to do this I still have this never give up attitude about life at this point I never really saw how far this clan could go I always forced myself to believe there's more to life than what it showed me so far. So I knew I had to give up gaming too succeed.
HAPPYdepression was a 2nd profile I've always had for a long time like most of my other profiles lol if that persons good at RFG there's like a 90% possibility that it's me or me in disguise. I was never supposed to get involved with the clan using that profile that was a mistake I seem to make pretty often. But I got involved suspicion was high from the start with ZZ00M a german having a brain could tell it was me easily mainly because all Germans can see KA-POW through german super goggles or something else that's german.
The clan was arguing amongst themselves for weeks the clan was falling apart I was watching my creation sway side to side and I knew what I really wanted to life. Watching something you created to be so powerful almost crumble is hard to watch I couldn't let it happen it I knew I seriously could not turn my back on this im in way too deep.
From that day I haven't changed I'm committing my life and educations too improve the clan in any way possible but first I had to come back and sort the clan out. I don't know why but nax and Paokid went on some "oh my mikal a psychopathic freak everyone run too LEON!!" Leon haha are you serious now I knew they were only running to him too piss me off so I knew getting them back would be piece of cake. Nax was never going to be the smarted of people no matter how many times I taught him and the less said about Paokid intelligence the better haha. I think sacred followed but sacred just german and also ZZ00M left and he's german so I was left with Sulphury and flameproof and I still said bring it on oh but WAIT!! Shadow riders is a clan for fun people hahahah Muhahaha massive evil laugh seriously all I had to do was sit back and watch you guys come back into the clan. Yeah that entire paragraph makes me sound like a complete douche but im telling it from my view. So I screwed up with HAPPYdepression as I went through a phase of huge life decisions whilst use were just doing anything to annoy a Scotsman but that's ok im used to that.
You guys really disappointed me that week everything I had done for you guys everything I went through and I made one bad mistake and all of a sudden I am a psychopathic maniac and do you know what that name has stuck with me since that week you all think im some crazy fucked up kid. Think about the times I gave you all that 2nd chance or the 8th considering leon. I don't mind doing all this work when you guys don't think much about the clan but I do fucking mind when I get told im pathetic and crazy and treated like shit for only trying to help.
Anyway as expected naxonax got fed up and bored of leon and re-joined and Paokid and the Germans soon followed and since then the clan has been running smoothly almost not another story for me to tell here is there.. IS THERE!!!
The Sweet Execution chapter 22
My whole life I've studied the human reactions and philosophys. Technically I am not a smart person but when it comes to people and life decisions everyone seems to turn to me for advice I always seem to know the right thing to say I can see bad decision from universe's away there was nothing I couldn't deal with in life.
And now the same was happening in the virtual world but this time I was in charge and that makes me very very dangerous. I thought I dealt with the toughest emotion of love through reality but now it was the only thing standing in the way of Virtual perfection.
Virtual Love such a sad story it's the only relationship that truly only 2 people can feel whilst everyone else thinks it weird or stupid or there simply not bothered. No one can get in the way of virtual love not like in reality.
You all know what the chapters about its about Z-zSwEEtThAnGz-Z obviously but was I ever in love with her no I was not I was never in love it was a more of I wanted to be in love but I stopped myself from doing so..
1. There's approximately a 95% chance that I will never meet her regardless of how we felt for each other.
2. Too much of a clash. By that I mean she doesn't look like the person she really is we've all seen her or anyone reading this obviously has let's be honest we would all have sexual intercourse with her(yes even the Germans.) She looks like she should never have owned a game in the first place. Sorry sweet but if you want my body you got to lower your standards you're too good looking to be true haha.
3. I'm too much of an asshole to consider a real relationship. I know I can't get a real girlfriend I just have these flings every now and then as I love the women body
But really im a sad loser I might never ever get a proper women but I don't care there's more to life than crying over the opposite sex
4. She wouldn't ever love me..
It was a very tough couple of months I was on medication at one point battling my demons telling me something I knew would only lead to chaos but then I learned love is not the strongest feeling of all time.. The strongest feeling of all time I death and that's how I feel about her at the moment I still talk to her but that spark I had the smile she put on my face when she came online is dead, no emotion. Nothing will destroy me... Nothing can as long as I don't let it.
December 13th was the day love saved me. I was coming back from the shops 9pm very dark a group of people were walking towards me I knew this meant trouble so I kept my head down and kept walking I got nearer and nearer until they got close enough to say something. One of them said "hey what time is it"
I said "9pm"
And he grabbed my arm and said "WHAT" in a rather nervous tone. So what did I do? Well I head butted him and started punching the hell out of him the guy was 20 something so I got what I could out of him and I think he knew he couldn't win the fight so he punched me once and ran off with his crew.
But lucky bastard that punch turned out to have broken my rib and that rib burst into and cut my lung. At the time I didn't know that it just felt soar but once I got home I started feeling dizzy. I was then rushed to hospital I was told The rib burst my lung and was told all that medical stuff that no one understands except the doctor himself so anyway I was then told had to get an operation he was going to perform surgery by opening the area that is wounded in my body and fix it he said it's nothing to worry about but it may leave you a big scar.
So I went back home that day and was told to rest for tomorrow. "Yeah were going to take apart your stomach tomorrow but don't worry nothing serious."
LMAO oh yeah sure don't worry I'll just lay back and take it fucking easy you tool.
I never told my parents how I hurt myself I just told them I fell it's enough to make them believe, as if they even cared in the first place, as if anyone would really care. Does anyone here truly care what happens to me… no not many although I may be remembered by most of you's for the rest of your life's you won't ever have a feeling for me. I like it that way.
Or maybe some people like to pretend to care about me like sweet. That night she told me that she truly loved me. I knew she was lying but it was nice to know she might possibly have cared for me. I wanted to love her back I truly did but is this love?
Love is such a powerful word and so is words like hate you can't truly hate something unless it does something so bad. The same thing goes for love except people forget that or they don't believe in that and that leads to a broken down rushed relationship.
That night I think I fell in love and I mean who could blame me she's perfect for me. She's hot and she plays video games could a guy like me ask for anymore. That night she was worried I was going to die or worse (can you get worse than death?)
I reassured her everything would be fine I told her I will make it through I promised her everything will be ok. I've never broken a promise... Mainly because this was the first promised I ever made
So the next day I went to the hospital, I lay down on the surgery bed and they put me too sleep. Everything was in the hands of the doctor for once I had no control.
Now I don't remember a thing about the operation all I can tell you is what the doctor said to me afterwards.
He made a mistake a big one he miss-judged the size of the wound and used the wrong size of equipment causing the wound to become larger I was losing a lot of blood and fast it all looked over for me. Obviously I lived well yeah sort off. I was technically dead for 7 seconds. But that is not the amazing thing the thing the doctor told me I screamed the name Emma just as I went into a death state. It must have been true I didn't mention Emma to him before the surgery. He told me you tend to think of the most important things and in your case say them when your body starts evaporating.
Maybe she didn't save me but to me she did she made me realise how important she could be too me. She could have been the one and only. That week I was in love with Emma Smith although I really fucking hate her 2nd name I was willing to do anything to change it too Hardie I was doing that thing people do in love I was thinking about future about life for once gaming and the clan were out of memory.
But it was killing me, it was killing me so much my mind spinning out of control the walls in my room were closing in I felt alone again I felt depressed all these bad emotions that I've trapped inside of me were coming out I was screaming out loud just wanting to get rid of every little bit of hatred I ever had I was letting it all go I knew I could never be with her I knew I will never be the popular guy I know I might be the most hated guy around but I am Michael Hardie and I simply don't care of anyone's opinion of me or anyone's feelings towards me good or bad because I have one goal in my head and I won't stop, nothing will stop me until it's done.
You can throw whatever you want at me I will just shrug it off so easily. Some things in life feel impossible to destroy, luckily for use im that thing. Now im virtually indestructible and even more so in reality, everything that happens I've seen it all before.
"Nor love, nor hate, nor death shall destroy me"
I now have now had no feelings for Emma although I'd still bang the fuck out of her if given the chance but hey that's just me. That's just Michael the kid who won't feel any emotion unless it's a good one… customizable ostriches for the win people
Virtual love...lol wtf was that all about?
When It should of ended Chapter 23
Im a dangerous kid, Very dangerous behind the charismatic smile and dark jokes hold a power stronger than anything you've seen before, A mind so strong but sometimes too strong and sometimes can meltdown. Sometimes I see things that aren't even there I just imagine them and I can never get them out of my fucking head. Sometimes I scream in my sleep, sometimes I hold a knife in my hand and I tell myself "fucking do it Michael End it all." Why im still alive I do not know. Maybe I guess I have something to live for. But what is it Michael c'mon Michael who or what are you living for you're the kid with all the answers now answer it Michael why are you here just why won't you give up and let it all go. One day everything will be gone but why is that day not today why have I been allowed to live today. I ask that every time I wake up "Why am I alive today?"
What is keeping me alive what is stopping me from going completely crazy. Sometimes I lay down on my dead and I feel like going on a crazy murderous rampage but just who the hell stops me. This pains this anger inside of me it never leaves its screaming in my head 24/7 I can't sleep because of it. I look at life I see nothing. These people who say hello trying to be so nice yet so fake. These people there all the same they won't ever know what goes inside of my head. I also notice im not different to them "We all put on our pretend smile; Maybe we are ALL crazy in the inside." One of these days someone's going to push me just that little bit further than they should and the consequences will be devastating. What happens to the kid who has nothing to lose when he loses the last thing he's got and that is control. If I've I ever lost control myself I can't even dare to think what would happen. I never had a friend, never had that guy to talk to just to let my mind be more free.
For sure I let you guys know everything about me. In truth I don't think im letting you know anything this whole forum is used as some sort of place for my mind to speak. Im all jokes and laughs on RFG but when I turn that game off you guys don't know what goes through my fucking mind. Do you know what it's like to see the world for what it really is? Its hell IT IS FUCKING HELL!. And I so badly want to get out it fucking won't leave its everywhere I go the lies, the cheats, the god damn greed and stupidity of the human nature. How do you people keep smiling are you really happy? Are you all really fucking happy with yourself. You are all nothing, your stupid. You need to be smart to see the world for what it is. "You must be stupid to enjoy life." Well done you stupid retarted fucks enjoy your life you dis-obeyed the rules you cheated and lied I hope you all have a fucking great time.
One of these days I almost lost it, I let my mind go out of control for 1 split second just that 1 split second. And I nearly ended it all. Well like half of these fucked up story's can go. There was this girl… Different from the rest. I've been in 24 relationships and had sex over a 100 times or so I don't keep track. I never "loved" a girl. Never… its all just sex and talk. I don't get along with guys all my friends are girls apart from on the PlayStation 3. Girls like me and I like vagina and that's how it goes. I sometimes get close to girls were I get a slight connection in personalities but then bang I ruin the relationship because im gaming too much or im fucking there best friend behind there back or something but who cares? Maybe they do but since when did someone like me care. Im supposed to be the evil bad guy right? Isn't that my strength? One girl was different she looked at me different. She was an outright slag and at first I was like yeyy vagina. So I met up with her for the first time. And when I first saw her… I was scared of her. She had that look in her eye that I see in myself every time I look in the mirror every single morning. She saw the same in me we had this awkward 10 second stare into each other's eyes until I put on my usual charming self so I said "hey you must be alyx" (think its ok for me to mention her name) So anyway I kept talking I usually always start of with a huge enthusiastic speech when I meet a girl before I even hear her voice and I speak very fast when I do it. So as I was
"Hey you must be alyx I like your name it's a Y instead of an E that's like cool im cool with that I hope you can spell my name right Its Michael with an A after the H I hate it when people spell my name wrong so anyway gorgeous how's your day been going, looks like you've had a boring day well don't worry im here now and im an exciting guy you look exciting lets go and do exciting stuff like watching fat kids play football(always add a wtf joke in there) there like really…"
She then just gave me that weird look and said "please kiss me" and I was like
<<that face lol
I don't what it was we had but she knew something, It felt like she knew everything about me. We had never met before in our life's but this girl, I could just see it on her face that she's been through everything and yet still had nothing. She knew what it felt like to give everything you got and get absolutely nothing in return. She knew how I felt. I won't ever forget the day she told me "This nightmare, it won't ever end Michael, but do what I do. Enjoy the nightmare." Yeah I was like im the one who comes up with the bad-ass phrases what the fuck is this? Lol
I guess I can tell you a little bit about her. Even if she reads this I don't care she wouldn't care. She was small with big boobs, She is one of my towns biggest sluts. My college mates tormented me with jokes about her for a long time haha. She likes male company she feels protected that way. You guys might call her a slut but Im going to ask you guys if im any different? Nearly all my friends are the opposite sex likewise with her; I sleep around a lot likewise the same as what she does. We were both so identical in so many ways and that's why when we first met I felt she was different from all the others and I knew she felt the same. People might say we were in "love" but god damn I hate that word it's fucking over-used and people only seem to be able to say it over the fucking internet. She was the first person I was able to say I "I love you" face too fucking face.
She told me I was the first guy not to fuck her on the first date. And I told her you're the first girl too admit there a slut to me (typical why the fuck did you say that it wasn't even funny Michael response.) So anyway I fucked her on the second date I felt like that was a fucking achievement. We also had sex when we broke into her high school at night and fucked in the head teacher's office. Yeah craziest thing I've done. So I think I might stop talking about fucking your guys are probably getting a bit "jealous" lol jokes.
So I dated her for a month and that's a damn record. Then she dumped me because she got assaulted which she lied about typical Im going to pretend to be single to fuck this guy who I never met. She isn't very good at keeping secrets. And trying to keep secrets from me is near impossible.
But when I first found out she was cheating on me and she thought for one second she could dump me and move on without me doing or suspecting anything oh how wrong could you of been alyx how much of an idiot you are. You lied to my face you gave me false hopes and you thought I was just going to be "Another one of those guys." Well im not just another guy im fucking god damn KA-POW and you don't fuck with my mind you don't ever try to torment it will kill everything. She took my mind too far she took it past the point where I couldn't care anymore.
I picked up a huge kitchen knife, I put on my hoody, I plugged my music on into my ears and at 2am I started walking towards her house. It's a long 2 hour walk, but I got there. I stood out her house and Roared her name. I did so for about 5 minutes then oh she arrived. Luckily she was the only one home. (She lives alone with her brother and little sisters, brother was probably partying and don't know about where her sister was.) She came out and said "what the fuck you are doing". I gave her the smirk and said lets go for a walk shall we, she got dressed and so we did. Of course it wasn't as easy as that but she did in the end suspecting nothing more than me to try to be romantic and win her over.
We went on our usual walk. We did this walk through the woods we've done it a few times before and we have this "Favourite spot." I bring her there, I then turned to her and I grabbed her and I looked at her for the very last time and then I saw it, Those eyes the ones so identical, she saw me bring out the knife and she didn't even panic she didn't even move, She stayed silent and she gave me that look I knew she would give. She couldn't care if I killed her, she had nothing all I needed to realise is she let me go because like me she didn't EVER want to have something to lose.
What I did next. I took that knife I grabbed her hand, I put that knife in her hand and I looked at her in the eye and I said…just please kill me. She didn't know what to do. But I wanted her to stick that fucking knife right through me so I could bleed so fucking badly. I want this nightmare to end so badly. You guys won't ever understand what it's like to be inside of my head. Im just one big pretending joke, Everything I do its just pretending I won't ever know who I am. I just want someone to tell me Michael just chill the fuck out but I won't ever that person. I don't have anyone to look up to im so fucking alone in this world. Everyone I see is so happy, why can't I be happy. I get women, im good at sports, im a fucking great gamer and im a smart guy why am I so fucking lonely. I've never ever had a friend. NEVER.
Obviously she never killed me; she threw the knife away and hugged me. Then I whispered in her ear "Im going to get you back for not killing me." And so I did. I kicked the crap into her brother and fucked her sister. Simple as that don't need any details or long fucking story this story is long enough.
Im an asshole, I do things sometimes where I feel like I have no control over. Must never lose control and must never control others. Why am I so fucking different? I could watch a man burn to death and not feel a flicker of emotion, I could murder all of you and put on a sadistic smirk, I could watch the world end and tell myself fucking hell RFG isn't going to be too active now is it. I only ever care about myself. Its all just a game, and I always win
So here I am again searching for another girlfriend or fuck buddy I should just call them since I have no need to care for a women's feeling or needs. Sometime I feel like I need that someone to protect. To give me a reason to show my anger.
…my main goal in life and whole point in this clan goes on. "To find happiness." Sometimes I just wish It would find me
THE END OF THE BEGINNING chapter 23
The H@RDIES a remarkable achievement. The thing I like most about us is how serious we actually take things. I remember when ZZ00M created our 1st website the whole clan acted like they've never seen a website before, our 1st banner people looked in glory and now look at us on YouTube all these things seem so small now but they were big movements at the time.
The clan was built around potential it's the way I've built it. Some potentials fail some come through.
The thing is good or bad where all here now we're all here for a reason and this story this is why I'm here this why I do all these things that to some seem so pointless and tiring. "Mike you're fucking crazy" they all say. You don't know the meaning of crazy in fact im the complete opposite as you'll notice im capable of stopping myself going on a murderous rampage and trust me oh I really do feel it at time I feel I need attention and that would just be the very easy option. I've never took the easy option and I never god damn will.
What I offer in this clan is opportunity, the feeling to be part of something, a 2nd home, a virtual school.
People come to me because of my wisdom and the feeling I can offer. People think im weird. Well maybe I am in your eyes but if you've read this story you will realise I really am just different. Ok maybe I was born with this unique power to deal with emotions to analyse everything within seconds to always give the correct answer.
I've never been the most intelligent of people but I give the most answers, I hope this story brings hope too all around I hope this clan reaches remarkable heights and oh my this clan can believe me I have a business plan already made. You see clans are like a sport were teams the only difference is its not official. No one takes clans serious there mostly filled with fucking stupid kids but there's those select few that are magic.
People would watch clan battling I believe clan battling can be bigger than the world cup or the super bowl people would watch 2 clans battling ,people will get to know us people and will see the amazing story. It's all just dreams at the moment but I already have game company's keeping tabs on us.
They told me it would be impossible people wouldn't watch kid push buttons. And I simply said
"if you don't run fast enough you won't win the Olympics, if you don't push your damn buttons faster than lightning then you will never be a H@RDIE"
Were the biggest clan that has ever been made we can achieve something truly magnificent we can be the best of the best but this is going to take hard work.
This is of course the master version of the auto-biography and I've edited as I think this game deserves a true ending and oh we have one. Red Faction Armageddon will not have competitive multiplayer. And as I write this my clan Is working as hard as they can to save the only thing we have left and that is RFG. It won't end and it never will. Will we succeed we don't know but like most things I do I will always find a way to succeed. You just can't beat me no matter how many times you god damn kick me down, Im a fucking monster that won't give up until he's won.
I've always said this nightmare won't ever end. It won't but this nightmare its changing…maybe this nightmare could soon become the perfection of a dream.
And that dream that one goal...Is to be remembered forever
Writing this story has been a journey itself for me I'm glad I did it but we all must remember there's a new beginning after this as this truly is the end of the beginning.
"The boy who would forever win, as he never had anything lose"-Michael Hardie
Last edited by mikalhardie on Mon May 23, 2011 4:02 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Fri Mar 11, 2011 6:07 pm
its amazing michael im gonna do another version of mine and expand let you know as much as we know about you
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Fri Mar 11, 2011 7:53 pm
wow man heaps good it took me ages to read like 3hours lol
and thanks for mentioning me in it
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 5:23 am
no problem guys
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 6:34 am
LOL ive actually no time to read it right now but ive already printed it out
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 6:38 am
Awesome nice to know haha
i actually haven't read it but it should take 3-5 hours reading if you read from start to finish without stopping
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 3:46 pm
goddamn that took me1hour 30m
pretty interesting, a lot of shit happened to you at such young
age. the rib story seems made up but good readin lol
i really hope rfa is awesome. so we can rule there from the start
Got me pumped to play RFG!
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 3:49 pm
alls true but i might over exagerate sometimes as i always do haha i will take picture of the scar i have if you want to see my body
and lets play RFG till we die... Or until RFA comes out YEEEEAAAAH!!! lol
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:24 pm
I've read it 3 1/2 hour's...
Awesome, Mike! Really awesome.
*I want back into the good old times*
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sun Mar 13, 2011 6:00 am
Yeah the good old days were the small decisions mattered alot more, they were good times hopefully we go back there for RFA
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Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sun Mar 13, 2011 6:09 am
Iv'e realised this story more or less affecting people who were here from the start. Rob, leon and ZZ00M(once he's read it) I think this truly shows who did all the "hard work" for the clan for those who stuck by till the end.
This story will be with us till the end regardless of what happens in our lifes
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Minnesota, USA
Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sun Mar 13, 2011 9:50 am
holy shit LOL im gona print this out and read it xD I can already tell its gonna be a great and hopefully truthful story. Good job!
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Minnesota, USA
Subject: Re: THE END OF THE BEGINNING
Sun Mar 13, 2011 6:52 pm
well i've read the story and i have to say i have new respect for you mikalhardie! You told it like it happened yesterday. And hearing about that old Elitez team made me LoL out of good memories. And the ultimate 4v4 was one of the best times i've had in a clan match. Ahhh i wish i could bring back the days of mine and Lk's tag team and H@RDIES vs Elitez
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