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The Sex Issue: Oral Fixations Cubs 'n' Cougars Sticky Web The Sex Ora Issue: al Fixation Cubs 'n ns n' Cougars Sticky W Web mighty arrow pale ale is brewed by new belgium brewing fort collins co 02 THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10
Don't Me Touch There Dani Burlison bundles up at the hug club p21 The Sex Issue: Ora Fixations Cubs `n' Cougars Sticky W Oral Fixation al ns `n n' Web 02 mighty arrow pale ale is brewed by new belgium brewing fort collins co 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Performances Enrich. Educate. Entertain. Your Community Non-Profit Arts Center for 28 years ...... ...... General Member's on-sale now! General Public on-sale Friday at noon General Member's on-sale now! General Public on-sale Friday at noon For tickets call 707.546.3600 (noon-6pm Tue-Sat) Online wellsfargocenterarts.org Highway 101 to River Road, Santa Rosa � Connecting our Community through the Arts Wells Fargo Center for the Arts gratefully acknowledges generous support from FREE ECTURE FREE LECTURE! with Edward Bauman, M.Ed., Ph.D. Wed, Feb 24 6pm�7:30pm DON'T LIVE IN PAIN! GoodFeet.com Are you tired of living in constant back, knee or foot pain? Good Feet arch supports are custom-fit to place your feet in THE most ideal position for better body alignment and pain-free comfort. 2669 Santa Rosa Avenue Just south of Yolanda on Santa Rosa Ave earn about herbs, foods and nutrients that will increase your energy, sensuality and sexuality. This lecture is an alluring blend of scie science and folklore not to be missed. A light snack will ence folklore mis ssed. g b served. Bring be served. Bring a special friend to share a taste of Dr. d share Dr. Ed's Love Potion Ed's Love Potion # 9 and let your love light shine. your love Bauman College Bauman Holistic Nutrition and Culinary Arts Holistic Nutrition Culina y Arts ar 10151 Main St. Suite 128 Main St. Suite Pe Penngrove, CA 94951 enngrove, e Over 300 sizes, with a variety of style for all shoes types. All arch supports come with a limited lifetime warranty! w w w. B a u m a n C o l l e g e . o r g www.BaumanCollege.org (800) 987-7530 9 707. 5 2 6 . 5 6 0 0 We also carry shoes and other foot comfort products. 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN 03 Feel at Home with Your Dentist! ! Full Service Dentistry ! 21 Years in Practice ! Cosmetic Dentistry ! Warm environment with knowledgable staff ! All ages welcome! Rose Lucchese DDS 568 Petaluma Ave Sebastopol 707-829-0692 04 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 05 The Wells Fargo Center for the Performing Arts blew it ("All's Not Well at Wells," Feb. 3). Letting Rick Batalini go was a self-destructive move. Rick brought the entertainers to Santa Rosa, and his personality sold out their shows. My husband and I traveled to San Francisco, Oakland, San Jose, Mountain View, Concord and finally were able to stay in our own backyard to hear amazing concerts! Why on earth would Wells Fargo send Rick walking and destroy a much-needed venue and a valuable connection for this small community? If Wells Fargo Center has a clue they will beg him to return, apologize to the community and give him a raise! At long last the Supreme Court has made a decision that real Americans can get solidly behind and ended second-class citizenship for longoppressed corporations. Restricted for decades, their freedom of speech curtailed and stif led, corporations could only spend limited amounts on election campaigns, a disgraceful defiling of their First Amendment rights. Not since their greatest hour--preventing Al Gore from becoming president--has the court so triumphed in the cause of free-market democracy. Finally corporations, their tiny voices choked by the campaign-financereform fanatics, can be heard throughout the land. Their long-overdue full personhood has been established, and they are now free to speak their minds and support with their heard-earned fortunes the righteous and deserving. Bite on that, liberal Democratic (redundant?) surrender-monkeys. Only trouble is that the court didn't go far enough. Everyone knows corporations are persons and deserving of individual rights--so why can't they vote, run for office or get married if they want? Why are corporations left out in the cold, excluded from the warm inner sanctum of full citizenship? This was a glaring oversight in jurisprudence, but it's only a matter of time. Rejoice, fellow real Americans, and imagine the incredible mess we'd be in now if Gore had become president. One shudders to think. We'd all be forced to marry trees and put clothing on animals. Re: Preview of 2 By 5 at the Raven Theater ("Perfectly Marvelous," Critic's Choice, Jan. 27). I saw this show recently. Lots of talented performers, lots of energy, but lacked "edge." Meaning? So fastpaced--as if racing to beat the clock--that subtle nuances, ironic twists and sociopolitical jabs were largely lost. A few soloists knew how to "sell a song," and they did. But mostly the pacing steamrollered the content. Oh, well. I guess they never promised us Joel Grey or Bebe Neuwirth. This incessant rain is getting too many of us down. Could one of you birthers please write a letter to the Bohemian claiming that President Obama wasn't born in the USA and is a Muslim? It's been too long, and laughter, after all, is the best medicine. It would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. 06 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN news for Sonoma, Marin & Napa Counties "Official Newspaper of Henrietta Lacks' Immortal Cells" y The California Public Employees' Retirement System has invested in such prohibited places as Sudan, banned for its treatment of the Darfur people. CalPERS bucks the state Legislature by profiting off Iran and Sudan By Dave Maass n defiance of state laws, California's public-employee pension fund has tens of millions of dollars invested in companies whose operations support the governments of Sudan and Iran. In 2006, the California Legislature passed a law banning the California Public Employees' Retirement System (CalPERS) from investing in companies, particularly those in the energy industry, that collaborate with and fund the Sudanese government, which is accused of perpetrating an ongoing genocide of the Fur, Masalit and Zaghawa peoples of the Darfur region. In 2007, the Legislature prohibited CalPERS from investments in companies conducting business with Iran, citing the country's alleged sponsorship of terrorism and its nuclear ambitions. The laws also lay out procedures for negotiating with these corporations to improve their humanitarian efforts. CalPERS, which holds $200 billion in global assets, is required to divest all of its holdings in corporations that refuse to respond. At least one corporation in CalPERS' portfolio, China Petroleum & Chemical Corporation, is restricted by both laws. Also known as Sinopec Corp., the company is a publicly traded subsidiary of the Chinesegovernment-owned Sinopec Group, one of the largest oilfield-services providers in Sudan. Sinopec Corp. also holds energy exploration contracts in Iran and is applying for further engineering work. CalPERS holds 620,000 shares in Sinopec Corp. stock, worth an estimated $49 million. Prior to the Sudan legislation's passage, CalPERS issued a policy statement barring investment in nine Sudan-linked corporations. Sinopec was the second on the list. "There is no place for these companies in our investment portfolio until the atrocities and human-rights violations end," CalPERS board of administration president Rob Feckner said in a press statement in May 2006. At the time, CalPERS wasn't invested in any of those corporations. Now California has more money tied to Sudan and Iran than it did before the legislation was enacted to curtail these investments. CalPERS began buying stock in Sinopec in the summer of 2007 and currently holds shares in two other companies on the initial list: Bharat Heavy Electricals Ltd., an Indian corporation, and Petrochina Co., through its subsidiary CNPC Hong Kong, which also operates in Iran. Asked why these corporations now have a place in CalPERS' portfolio, THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 07 Fine Dining For Wild Birds 71 Brookwood Ave., Santa Rosa 707.576.0861 Mon-Sat 10am-6pm, Sun 11am-4pm � www.wbu.com Birdseed . Feeders . Birdbaths . Optics . Nature Gifts . Books Feckner deferred to CalPERS' spokesperson Brad Pacheco. When the legislation passed without an indemnification provision protecting CalPERS from financial loss, Pacheco says, the policy "statement was essentially a moot point." Los Angeles city councilmember Paul Koretz, who sponsored the Sudandivestment initiative while in the state assembly, calls CalPERS' recent investments "absolutely outrageous." "There's no question that Sinopec is definitely a bad actor," Koretz says. "It was identified as a bad actor back in 2006." Each year, CalPERS must send the Legislature comprehensive reports on its holdings in companies covered by the Sudan and Iran divestment laws. In its Dec. 31, 2009, report, CalPERS relied on information from the investment analysis firm RiskMetrics Group to declare Sinopec a "newly identified" holding. This contradicts a RiskMetrics subsidiary's 2004 finding that Sinopec is complicit with the Sudanese government, in addition to CalPERS' 2006 policy statement and the fact it has been a shareholder for more than two years. In its report, CalPERS listed which holdings met the laws' criteria but did not disclose the amounts. The pension board also omitted mention of a policy it passed in February 2009 banning divestment across the board in response to legislative initiatives. Instead, CalPERS told the Legislature that the board had decided only to not liquidate its holdings "at that stage." "I'm shocked that CalPERS adopted a policy prohibiting divestment when the state passed laws that direct otherwise," Koretz says. "They should absolutely get their act together and go after this company, which is one of the clear violators propping up the Sudan government's genocide." Koretz is a Democrat, but divestment is an issue embraced by both parties. His bill, AB 2941, passed with more than three-quarters of the legislators in both the assembly and the senate voting yes and was a subject of the 2007 documentary Darfur Now. The Iran divestment law, AB 221, the first legislation of its kind, passed unanimously in both houses. Assemblyman Joel Anderson, a Republican representing El Cajon, sponsored AB 221 as a freshman in the Legislature. Last summer, Anderson and 19 other legislators wrote to CalPERS demanding an update on its implementation of the act. Anderson says the Assembly Committee on Public Employees, Retirement and Social Security will hold a hearing on the matter on Feb. 24. "I believe they have a lot to disclose," Anderson says. "What many of my colleagues and I are concerned about is this general nose-thumbing they're giving to everybody in the world. They feel they're above the law, and I'm eager to have them come into committee and go on the record." CalPERS invokes clauses that allow it to withhold action if it believes selling the stock would undermine its "fiduciary duty," its responsibility to make the best possible investment decisions for the pension fund's beneficiaries. Anderson counters that CalPERS can find other investments with similar returns. Plus, he says, investing in Iran puts the pension fund at risk. "There are alternatives we can participate in so we have balance in our portfolio and, at the same time, obey the law," Anderson says. "If Obama gets tough on [Iran], they may have to confiscate those assets. I'm not prepared to explain to my constituents that I thought it was a good idea to invest in the Islamic Republic of Iran with their pensions." CalPERS complies with portions of the laws that require the fund to engage these corporations in negotiations. This often takes the form of letters to executive officers. Currently, CalPERS is communicating with 24 companies doing business in Iran and 11 working in Sudan, many of which overlap. It's about to begin engagements with five more companies, including Sinopec and Bharat. CalPERS argues that divestment is ineffective since severing ties also means abandoning its leverage. Pacheco said CalPERS purchased $3.7 million worth of shares in Bharat in order to form a connection that would allow for engagement. But CalPERS isn't considered a leader in this area, compared with the California State Teachers' Retirement System (CalSTRS), which is subject to the same divestment laws. CalSTRS is a founding member of the Conflict Risk Network (CRN), a pool of investors that use a combined $700 billion in managed assets to pressure companies tied to Sudan. CalPERS is not a member. "We've always believed divestment is the prerogative of every investor, but we believe engagement can be effective," CRN director Melany Grout says. "I think divestment was built in to be teeth in some of the legislation. And in some of our engagement work, there were instances where the threat of divestment brought some companies to the table." Since 2008, CalSTRS has not held shares of Sinopec, which it acknowledges is prohibited by both state laws. According to CRN, Sinopec has been unresponsive since the very beginning. A recent move in the private-pension industry confirms Sinopec's unwillingness to respond to humanitarian crises. In March 2009, the $402 billion TIAA-Cref pension fund threatened to pull its investments from Sudan-linked corporations if they refused to "acknowledge the genocide and engage in a productive dialogue about how to confront it." As of Dec. 31, TIAA-Cref had unloaded $60 million in holdings in four corporations, including Sinopec, citing "insufficient progress." "The more we shine a light on this, the more ridiculous [CalPERS] policy looks," Anderson says. "You walk down the street, and this is one of the issues that everyone gets." Using investments to influence social change has been part of California pension policy since 1985, when the state passed a law banning investments in South Africa. The restrictions were lifted in 1994 following the end of apartheid. In 2000, CalPERS voluntarily sold its investments in tobacco companies, and current law requires the state pension funds to monitor companies in Northern Ireland for workplace discrimination and to report on companies accused of slave labor during World War II. Currently, a proPalestinian activist is collecting signatures to put an initiative on the ballot requiring CalPERS and CalSTRS to drop investments linked to Israel. "Divestiture is a peaceful means to a political end," says Chris Yatooma, the IraqiAmerican behind the ballot proposal. "It worked in South Africa, and it raised consciousness around the world." 08 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN In full-bodied shout-out for what Sonoma County's done right By Michael `Bug' Deakin e proud, Sonoma County! You, the resident voters of this county, have just helped add an emerald gem in the string of crown jewels that make up the green corona of Sonoma. Sonoma Land Trust has acquired the Jenner Headlands. These 5,630 acres of spectacular coastal property embrace the Pacific Ocean just north of the Russian River. Included are 1,500 acres of coastal prairie, 3,100 acres of redwood and Douglas fir forest and three spawning streams for steelhead trout. The area is a haven for rare species, including northern spotted owls and California red-legged frogs. Peregrine falcons, hawks and ospreys ride the wind over the prairie, and mountain lions, cougars, coyotes and badgers call this piece of earthly delight home. There are more than eight miles of pristine streams gurgling through the Russian and Jenner gulches. I spent a Sunday with Brook Edwards, project manager for Jenner Headlands, touring this dramatic property and identifying the reusable materials to be gleaned from the first round of cleanup. Heritage Salvage wants to help the agency prepare the property for public access. I talked story with our environmentalist champion, Bill Kortum, on my Monday morning "Green Scene" KRSH 95.9-FM segment. Bill has held positions as county supervisor, chairman of California Coastal Alliance and founder of Sonoma County Conservation Action, to name a few. "Expressing the voters' green mandate," he said, "the Sonoma County electorate has used the ballot box to protect its coast, take control of land use in our community separators, establish voter control over urban growth boundaries around most of the cities, fund SMART rail, express concern for agriculture and our beautiful scenery by creating and twice financing the Open Space District, and establish the scenic corridor and its rules below Petaluma. Sonoma County is receiving growing statewide recognition for what the voters' green mandate has accomplished." In the early '70s, I was fortunate enough to spend some rambling afternoons and evenings with Chief Dan George. As the chief shared with me the wisdom of his First Nation Peoples-- that's what we call our indigenous people in my native Canada--there was a common thread among his teachings. "We did not inherit this land from our ancestors," he reminded. "We are caretaking it for our children." Well, Sonoma County, we have voted for that very sentiment, and so far, the county supervisors have been diligent in carrying out our wishes, our green legacy, if you will. We do have a sticky wicket in Petaluma, where the voters chose to designate a scenic corridor along Highway 101 the entrance to Sonoma County. Now there has been a thrash of wrangling and posturing to put Dutra's asphalt plant in that protected scenic corridor. That would take five zoning changes, and even though we voted by a supermajority--more than two-thirds--to protect that corridor, the supervisors are still considering it. The asphalt plant's EIR says that we already have three times more asphalt production than is needed in Sonoma County. Kortum states that, in essence, the only jobs it would generate would be those taken away from the other asphalt companies already present. Santa Rosa and Petaluma voters can repeat their voter mandate in 2010 when urban growth boundaries will be on the ballot for renewal. Let us keep Sonoma County on the map as the greenest, largest open space, best-protected habitat and most careful growth area of this nation. And maybe, just maybe, we can figure out how to make jobs while we caretake these jewels in our midst. As the economic stimulus funds make their way around the nation, while CEOs still wheedle golden parachutes from companies that we taxpayers bought, and with state parks closing because the government has difficulty running their company, maybe we can figure out how to make those gems in our midst pay for themselves. I'm working on it. Any suggestions? It's your open space! To inquire or be updated regarding guided hikes to the headlands, email email@example.com. To support the ongoing maintenance, please visit the Land Trust website at www.sonomalandtrust. org or call 707.526.6930, ext. 108. To learn more about the Dutra project, go to www.saveschollenbergerpark.com. Lowest Price in Town! Maybe we can figure out how to make jobs while we caretake these jewels in our midst. Michael `Bug' Deakin is the proprietor of Heritage Salvage, purveyor of patinaed treasures, promoter of environmental and social justice, and a practitioner of sustainable enthusiasm. www.heritagesalvage.com. Open Mic is a weekly feature in the Bohemian. We welcome your contribution. To have your topical essay of 700 words considered for publication, write email@example.com. Brazilian Waxing 35 $ Touchstone Therapies 707.331.0631 "Always Professional, Always Affordable" 882 2nd Street, Santa Rosa | www.touchstonespatherapies.com THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 09 Numina Center for Spirituality & the Arts 2010 Special Events Event Details, Times & Tickets: `Unlisted Creatures,' the further adventures of Sally Smart, cub reporter By Juliane Poirier ally! Will you come in here for a second?" Sally Smart gave a startled twitch and looked up from her keyboard. Her hot-headed boss stood in his doorway, arms crossed and frowning. Bill Boiled, editor of The Weekly Planet newspaper, was never a cheerful guy. He honored the notion that editors must speak in gravelly voices and act very grave, as they did in last-century comic books and in old paperback novels about mysterious crimes. Nobody messed with Boiled. Years ago when a flippant cub reporter laughingly told Bill to lighten up, the news room had gone silent; the culprit was called into the editor's office for a meeting with the door closed. The more experienced reporters had gleefully told Sally this tale, knowing she'd blanche when they told her the kid never came back to work. Getting called into Bill's office was a terrifying thing, Sally knew. She stood and pushed her chair under the desk, wiping sweaty palms into the chair upholstery. A few other cubicle inhabitants gave her sympathetic looks as she passed from the newsroom into the office. The door closed behind her. "Yes, Mr. Boiled?" Sally tried to act composed. "Sit down," he ordered, waving a hand at the only free chair. "And quit calling me Mr. Boiled. If you've worked here longer than a month, my name is Bill." Sally sat. The boss's office was a shrine to the past--a battered Nikon camera rested on a black Royal typewriter with a five-and-a-half-inch floppy disk stuck among the keys. In the hatband of a gray fedora was tucked a sheet of notes, the kind reporters used to take in small notebooks. Sally expected to see a trenchcoat, and was not disappointed; she spied one hanging on a coat rack with a tattered copy of Captain Marvel sticking out of the pocket. "Sally, what the hell is this?" Bill pointed at his computer screen where her trip to the Southwest borderlands was outlined on a travel request form. "Who the hell is out in the desert and what are you digging for out there when you should be covering the green beat?" Sally twisted a strand of blond hair as she spoke. "Oh, Mr. Boiled--I mean Bill. It's not a person. It's two species. I'm going to investigate the white-sided jackrabbit and the Sonoran desert tortoise. They're endangered and need federal protection." "Sally, this is marginal news," Bill said. "Animals disappear every minute. We need a big story, a real heart-thumper." Sally's face paled. She drew herself up in her chair, unable to stop herself. "Mr. Boiled," she said, voice quavering, "I mean, Bill. This is a big story. It's, it's . . ." She glanced at the rolled copy of Captain Marvel. "It's a planned affront to justice, a crime about to happen!" Boiled sat up straight. "Did you say `crime'?" "Yes," Sally said. "Animals don't have to disappear forever. Over 99 percent of all species ever listed under the Environmental Species Act are still here. So if we don't list them, we may be guilty of condemning them to certain death. Did you know that people are prejudiced against ugly animals, and the only way anything gets listed anymore is if it gets a nominal make-over or gets smuggled in with a good-looking animal?" Sally's voice rose. "That's the Bambi syndrome. But it's a hard, cold fact, Mr.--uh, Bill. My article might inspire the Fish and Wildlife Service to list and save the tortoise and the hare, which might lead to saving the less attractive but just as valuable species who share the borderlands." Sally was so worked up her face was red. "Boss, I know I must write this story because I asked myself, `What would Aesop do?'" She took a calming breath and looked him in the eye, knowing her job was on the line. "Now," Sally said, "I am asking you, Bill: What would Captain Marvel do?" The editor of the Weekly Planet looked away from her and gestured toward the door. In his gruffest voice, Bill Boiled said, "Go on. I want the copy on my desktop Monday morning." www.numinacenter.org FEBRUARY 27 & 28 The Soul's Flame: A Musical Journey from Dante's Divine Comedy Art Lecture & Concert with Kayleen Asbo, Shira Kammen, Devi Mathieu, Anita Barrows, Michelle Levy, Vox Flora & Vox Terra APRIL 2 Good Friday Concert: Stabat Mater, D.383 by Schubert Carol Menke, Kevin Baum Tom Hart, The St. Cecilia Choir & Cantiamo Sonoma with the Incarnation Orchestra Guest Conductor: Nick Xenelis JUNE 20, JULY 18 & AUGUST 15 Summer Chamber Concerts Sunday Afternoons w/Carol Menke & Friends JULY 30 The Hidden Gospel: Hearing Jesus With Aramaic Ears Dr. Neil Douglas-Klotz `Animals disappear every minute. We need a big story, a real heart-thumper.' 2010 Ongoing Events MONDAY EVENINGS Through the Ear to the Heart Sing the Music of Hildegard von Bingen as Contemplative Practice NOTE: See web site for meeting dates. TAIZE CARITAS FOURTH FRIDAYS Slideshow & Lecture with Kayleen Asbo followed by a Candlelit Service of Taize Chant & Healing FEBRUARY 26 Contemplating Love & Death: Rodin's Gates of Hell MARCH 26 The Annunciation in Art & Poetry Numina Center at the Episcopal Church of the Incarnation 550 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa 707.324.6021 10 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Your vision... my resources, dedication and integrity... Together, we can catch your dream. Suzanne Wandrei EcoGreen Certified 2006 Sebastopol Realtor of the Year www.bohemian.com www.bohemian .bohemian.com www.bohemian.com Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage 101 Morris Street - Suite. 100 Sebastopol, CA 95472 cell: 707.292.9414 Please call cell first office direct: 707.824.4260 www.bohemian.com www.suzannewandrei.com THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 11 12 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Can food really replace sex? By Rose McMackin ven if Western medicine has discredited almonds and rhinoceros horn as possessing no more aphrodisiac potency than a placebo, there's little doubt that food has a tremendous impact on the way we approach sex. The sensual textures of avocado or mango speak for themselves, and a perfect wine is more of a love potion than anything an apothecary ever cooked up. The choice of restaurant can even determine the future success of a date. My friend Joanna once told me, "No one ever says, `We went out for bean burritos and then went home to have the best sex of our lives.'" Anyone who's read one of Anthony Bourdain's racy kitchen memoirs or lusted over a sinfully delicious slice of chocolate cake knows that the line dividing sexual enjoyment from the delights of taste is already very thin. After all, Eve's original sin was an act of food, not sex. But what if, rather than merely being a precursor to the act, food is becoming the act itself ? "I don't believe in sublimation," declares former New York Times food critic Gael Greene. "In 18,783 meals as a restaurant critic, give or take two or 300, I have never eaten anything that was better than good sex. I read other critics insisting some extraordinary hand-churned chocolate ice cream is `better than sex.' I wonder if their sex is that perfunctory." A. V. Flox, editor of the internet site "Sex and the 405," blames the recession for a rampant sexual repression that eventually turned her into a foodie. It wasn't long after the market dropped that she opted for a divorce and started cooking. "Everything is carefully inspected, selected, purchased, put away, then taken out, washed, cut up, mixed, put to the flame . . . Sex to a lot of us has lost its focus on the details. It's lost its sensuality. The kitchen brings that careful attention to the senses right back. It resurrects eroticism," she writes. Food-preparation classes are reintroducing a new generation to primal hunting and gathering skills that have been collectively forgotten. If preceding generations considered it a luxury to be able to pay someone else to prepare their food for eating, it's suddenly a luxury to be able to bake one's own bread and grow one's own tomatoes in an ironic twist of food fate. "I love that earthy old-school arts like butchery are becoming fetishized in the food world," says "Biteclub" food blogger Heather Irwin. "Becoming that intimate with your meat is such a visceral experience. Touching, squeezing and feeling meat and bone, watching fat and muscle peel away like butter with a razor-sharp knife, then cooking and eating the animal is so primal." So if food and the act of tenderly preparing and eating it are the new sex, then cooking shows are the new porn, chefs the new porn stars. With decadent close-ups, "food porn" tempts viewers to reach into the image for a bite. And much like the feats of performance in pornography, which the average person would not attempt, food porn usually features exotic ingredients and complex recipes. "People talk about the objectification of women's bodies, or what I consider to be the objectification of sex itself, in porn, and you see that with food," says Michele Anna Jordan, cookbook author and food columnist who firmly believes that the pleasures of the table and the pleasures of the bed are inextricably linked. "Especially in shows like Iron Chef and Chef Smackdown, where you're watching it, sitting in your home and thinking, `Other people can do it better than I can.' There's passivity and indulgence. It's food as passive entertainment rather than food as one portion of daily life. It's less about enjoying food together with the people we love--maybe one, maybe more--in the home everyday." Perhaps Americans are bored with sex and are merely ready for another way to get in touch with their sensual side. In the wake of the sexual revolution, people are more concerned with risks like HIV and the taboos surrounding sexuality. If the gratifications of the kitchen exceed those of the bedroom, why not simply run with it? "I am willing to believe that sex may not be all that powerful or even accessible for everyone," Greene says. "And in that case, anyone who thinks melting chocolate cake is better than bad sex or no sex, I say, go for it. I definitely believe in pursuing pleasure." THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 13 14 bite club eats Illustration/Branding: Ranch7.com Illustration/Branding: Ranch7.com 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 15 oing good for others just got tastier, as Sausalito's bastion of linecaught fresh wild seafood, Fish Restaurant, hosts a Fat Tuesday benefit dinner for Haiti relief, Doctors Without Borders and area fisherman who practice sustainable practices. Set right on a working harbor in the less glamorous northern stretches of Sausalito, Fish is acclaimed both for the quality of the food it serves and the efforts it makes to ensure that the oceans continue to provide a bounty. They first started benefit dinners in order to help the people of New Orleans after the Katrina disaster. D This year honors the Big Easy with zydeco music and Creole dishes, but is focused on helping those in Hispaniola. Over the past four years, the restaurant has raised some $50,000 and in addition to benefitting Katrina victims, has given to the local salmon fleet, to the SalmonAid nonprofit and to area crabbers following the Cosco Busan oil spill. Auction items will abound and dancing is encouraged on Tuesday, Feb. 16, from 6pm to 9pm at Fish Restaurant, 350 Harbor Drive, Sausalito. $99. 408.416.8880. In Sebastopol, GTO's Seafood House also celebrates Fat Tuesday with Creole food, the Canal Street Jazz Band, a costume contest and the King Cake for a mere $5 cover. Happy hour with specialty drinks begins at 4:30pm and the music, at 6pm. 234 S. Main St., Sebastopol. 707.824.9922. The enamored can show olive their love at Jacuzzi Family Vineyards Feb. 13�14 as the winery hosts Olea europaea expert Don Landis and lots of home curers in a two-day celebration of oil from the Olive Press and UC Davis pomology professor Louise Ferguson stands by ready to answer growing, pruning and processing questions. On Saturday, radio host Gene Burns will broadcast live from the event and Dr. Judith Taylor will discuss her new book The Olive in California: History of an Immigrant Tree. The weekend is free and events run 10am to 4pm. 24724 Arnold Drive, Sonoma. 707.931.7551. LoCoco's I CUCINA RUSTICA I A Romantic Italian Evening for your Valentine LoCoco's is everything an Italian restaurant should be--boisterous, busy, fun, with excellent authentic food of the best quality. Fresh seafood, meats and pasta. Service is friendly and fast. Try the pappardelle with wild boar sausage and forest mushrooms; or the veal chop valdostana with fontina and prosciutto. Chicken under a brick is the best anywhere, including Italy. All desserts homemade. "4 star cannoli" - Jeff Cox, Press Democrat Olive celebrations pair up with wine and food at Vinolivo, an evening of good eats and great drinks on Feb. 12 at the the Lodge at Sonoma. Boutique and larger wineries pour while all manner of Sonoma Valley restaurants serve at this walk-around event that focuses on olives and oils, ports, sparkling wines and yes, pommes frites. General admission ticket sales close on Feb. 11 at 10pm and only a few tickets will be available at the door. 1325 Broadway (at Leveroni), Sonoma. 7pm to 10pm. $65. 707.935.0803. Gretchen Giles Voted Best Italian Restaurant of the North Bay --North Bay Bohemian Tues-Fri 11:30-2:30, Tues-Sun 5-10pm, closed Mondays 117 4th Street | Santa Rosa | 707.523.2227 16 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Back by popular demand: $45 locals 3 course prix fixe Now, through the end of March. Our incredible Thurs. Night Winemaker Dinner Series Hosted by Farmhouse Master Sommelier, Geoff Kruth Feb 4 Arnot-Roberts, Feb 18 Windgap, Mar 4 Scherrer Hot Hotel Deal, as featured in Travel & Leisure 2 nights & dinner in our Michelin starred restaurant.$512 Join us on Facebook 7871 River Road, Forestville For Reservations Call 707-887-3300 www.farmhouseinn.com Drink Local Uncorking Centuries of Artisan Excellence Festival Valentino Di Newpoli Fri, Feb 19th, 6-9pm Barrel Tasting of Sangiovese & Moscato di Fresco Dancing to to Italian Folk Ensemble COMPLIMENTARY CHOCOLATES WITH WINE TASTING FEB 14TH D'ARGENZIO WINERY 1301 CLEVELAND AVE., SANTA ROSA, CA 95401 [corner of cleveland ave. and ridgeway ave.] 707.280.4658 11am to 5pm www.dargenziowine.com THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 17 18 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN North County West County East County Mid County Upvalley THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 19 J Downvalley ust saying "mouth amuser" makes one smile. This translation of amuse-bouche, the term for a bite-sized, whimsical appetizer, could just as handily describe the effects of sparkling wine: a wet and tingly, alcoholfueled but welcome surprise, like a slightly sauced smooch, and lately I just can't get enough of it--the fizz, that is. Even long after New Year's, sparkling wine is nice anytime, thank you. Save the sit-down, three-course food and wine pairing in J Vineyard's Bubble Room for a special occasion, an occasion like . . . hey, it's Sunday. m a r sh a a dams don ajel lo a d el a a ke r s jo n q u i a l b i n w ar r en a r nol d m a r k a s h wo r t h jo c el y n au d e t t e olive ayh ens s a l l y b a ke r b r y a n b a r a s ch to d d b ar r i ck low r ay bel dn er jo e l b e n n e t t ter r y berlier j a n ic e b es t m a r y bl a ck kristine branscomb-fitzgerald r en a t a br e th mon i c a b r y a n t jo h n c a s e y be th ch a n gs t r om a r y a n ch a pp ell tom chow n d ebo r a h colo t t i m a r s h a conn ell nu a l a cr eed a b el a r do c r u z a li d a dg a r dei r dr e d aw c a r los de v ill a s a n t e kev in diminy a t z lind a j. ed w a r ds domini c eg a n s h aw n eis en a ch gl enn a ellio t t jo h n f e r d i c o s t ua r t fi n em a n louis a k in g f r a s e r r obil ee f r eder i ck s t eph en g a l low ay s h el l ey g a r dn e r d avi d g e t z p a m el a gl a s s co ck ch r is tin a gl e a s on s h ei l a go l d en to t ny gua r a l di - b r ow n n a th a n h a enl ein edg a r ha r is b a r b a r a har r is andr ea hibba r d cy n th i a h ipk is s cha r l e s hobs on c a dill a c - f r ed holi d ay t e r r y holl emon p a mel a holmes mil d r ed how a r d r obe r t hu ds on moll y hu n t e r umhol t z m a u r e en hur l ey jo e j a q u a lol l y jon es jo h n n y k a r w a n r o b ke l l e r k a r e n ke l l y ku r t kem p k a r e n ke s s e l tony k in g j am es k l eck n e r m a c h i ko ko n d o m a ur i c e l a pp p a u lin e l ev y l az z a r ini jo h n l e b a r o n lor r a in e l ei v a s hun g liu s a mi l y n n l a ng e ca t h e r in e mc c a u l ey z a cha r y mc co r mi ck j an e m c don a l d lou r d es m edin a m a r y mil el z cik cl a r k mi t ch ell s t ell a mond ay s u s a n mou l ton m a r ge moun t m a t t mu l lin s r on n a gl e m a r y n eu b a u er k a r in a nis hi m a r cus bob n u g en t l y nd a n u g en t jann nunn w il li a m o'kee f f e e r i c o l d m i xo n lind a o r t i z h a n y a po pov a p a r ke r mi a p a t t er son ken n e t h p el l e t i e r m a rk perlm an bill pf ef f er j am es po r t e r c a ppy po t t l e s u s a n p r es ton PART ICIPAT ING ART ISTS j pou w el s ca t h e r in e r i cha r ds on bill r iv a s g r ego r y r obe r t s joh n s a ppin g ton co r n eli a s chu l z s ylv i a s even t y r i cha r d s h aw w illi am smi th r a n d y s nyder jan so fie monik a s t ein er in e z s tor er j a ck s tu ppin jenn i f e r s t u r gil l t a g te a m a n n ha r ol d t aylo r k a thl een thomps on e h r e n t oo l gr eer up ton m a r io u r ibe el a in e vi cker y b ambi w a t er m a n jo h n w a t r o u s s all y wea r e shane wear e s co t t w e xel be r g bill w h eel er ju di t h w i l l i a m s br a d w ilson d avi d w y f f els y u r i ko y a m a g u c h i n an cy you d elm a n On a recent visit, a bigger and rowdier crowd might have applauded the kitchen staff as they walked each Lilliputian-sized course down the length of the room on large platters. J's Bubble Room program, designed by executive chef Mark Caldwell, is about a year old and changes every six weeks to feature produce in season. Looking out of floor-to-ceiling windows from the comfort of a double-L sofa, we can see that J is as popular as ever with young adults who stream across a moat to the business park-style concrete-and-glass building to crowd around the distinctive bar. But for extra attention, extra wine and--for some of us--a rare forkful of the fare of the epicure, J's well-run weekend program offers three deceptively wee courses that magnify their diverse and intense flavors like a loupe. Our amuse-bouche, an intricately detailed dollop of edamame-hummus on a wonton spoon, arrived shortly after a welcome flute of 1999 Vintage Brut ($40). Five years on the yeast rounded out this creamy sparkler, still light and alive with citrus zip and aromas of fresh linens. Paired with a demitasse of roasted cauliflower soup with watercress pur�e, the ample-bodied 2007 Russian River Valley Chardonnay ($28) showed aromas of roasted almond with caramel-taffy finish; crab cakes brought out its more exotic flavors. The 2005 Pinot Noir, Nicole's Vineyard, Block 4 ($50) was reminiscent of potpourri, spices, dried cherries and orange peel, and, while finishing dry, perfectly juiced up the dryness of the pink pork medallions, plated with rutabaga and roasted Brussels sprouts. The vegetarian alternative to softly splintering, braised veal cheeks was a sticky beet risotto, but upon being also served by some accident the foie gras, our vegetarian took the plunge. Paired with light pink, salmon-tinged Brut Ros� RRV ($30), foie gras on toastettes melted just like butter--tasted blind, one would guess, from a happy cow. Laden with rich, golden pear and honey flavors, the 1998 RRV Late-Disgorged Brut ($65) was spiced with nutmeg, while a fine, creamy mousse struggled against its weight. After finishing off the gras with a dollop of triple cream Brie on walnut cake, all while waving flutes of fizzy wine about, I looked towards the mirrors for a glimpse of some glutton of pre-revolution Versailles. By the time the nectarlike "Ratafia" ($42), a cognac-infused dessert wine, arrived with J Pear Liqueur floated on a pool of cooked cream over a little crock of chocolate pudding, I could no longer honestly say I hadn't gotten enough. J Vineyards and Winery, 11447 Old Redwood Hwy., Healdsburg. Open daily 11am to 5pm for tasting flights, $20. Bubble Room, Friday�Sunday only, 11am�3pm. $60. 888.594.6326. Bring your Sweetheart for a Romantic Evening with THE BAGUETTE QUARTETTE Celebrate Valentine's Day SPECIAL VALENTINE'S DAY MENU ENTR�ES Flame Broiled Filet Mignon served with a mushroom marsala sauce and potatoes au gratin at Rancho Nicasio Garlic & Rosemary Rack of Lamb served with roasted fingerling potatoes, butternut squash, and greens Lobster Ravioli with Dungeness Crab Alfredo sauce Fresh Seafood Paella with mussels, clams, prawns, scallops, cod and saffron rice On the Town Square Prime Rib of Beef au Jus with a baked potato and Yorkshire pudding Nicasio, California Baked Salmon en Cro�te with champagne sauce and creamy polenta 415-662-2219 www.ranchonicasio.com Dungeness Crab Louie Salad James Knight 20 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN The author and her buddy Skye in their matching glow-in-the-dark footie jammies. The `cuddle party' phenomenon leaves our writer alone in a crowd By Dani Burlison don't know if they have Valium at Target, but I will check," read the text message. My friend Skye was at the store in search of a matching set of footie pajamas for us. "This is it," I thought to myself as beads of sweat formed across my forehead. "We are actually going to a fucking cuddle party." I first heard of cuddle parties from a friend who planned one as her divorce steadily approached finalization. "Apparently, it is a safe place to explore nonsexual touch," she told me optimistically. I found myself both intrigued and curiously disgusted as she explained the concept: a group of strangers come together in a safe space to give and receive affection. Perhaps this could be the next step in my life as an armchair anthropologist, a practice in furthering my experience in field research and an opportunity to test my own boundaries and practice saying no. But stepping into an environment so far out of my comfort zone that I might as well be visiting Pluto was also a little horrifying. I needed some reassurance. The information on the front page of the CuddleParty.com website is straightforward and nonthreatening. Yet I couldn't erase the visions in my mind of middle-aged pony-tailed dudes cruising for young, pretty, affirmation-thumping New Age women. As I poked around the internet, however, photos of past parties, revealing bare arms intertwining indistinguishably in a sea of flannel-pajama bottoms and overstuffed pillows, tapped into a deep fear inside of me. Thoughts of germs and cold, clammy hands running lightly across my back while moaning and sighing mixed with enchanted dolphin music invoked visions of what I imagined would be not unlike an unwilling visit to a couple's tantra retreat. My blood pressure rose. I laughed nervously. I decided that I needed to go and see for myself. Head to Toe As we drove the streets of San Francisco, Skye already sporting his completely awesome glow-inthe-dark footie pajamas, I prayed that we would be lost for so long that they would not admit our late arrival. Being one of the most grounded and open-minded of my friends, Skye was there to calm my nerves and talk me down from the extreme anxiety I was experiencing. "I bet you 20 bucks that there are silk scarves and batik sarongs on the ceiling," I giggled to him as we arrived at our destination. We climbed the stairs and I took one last deep breath before marching up to introduce ourselves in the futon-filled room and pay the $30 per-person entrance fee. I looked up. Scarves and sarongs draped the ceiling. As I slinked down the dark hallway to change into my pajamas, a tall, lanky man dressed in a purple satin wrap-around THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 21 blouse, white short-shorts and purple opaque tights approached me. He stood against my slight frame with his hand on his hip and asked if this was my first cuddle party. "Do you get an edge from this kind of thing?" he asked. "I mean, like, do you really get an edge from this?" I replied that it was my first cuddle party, embarrassed to admit that I had no idea what "edge" meant. We chatted for a few minutes, and I decided that this guy, who was flamboyantly gay and presumably not interested in women and therefore nonthreatening, would be my new pal, my Safe Buddy, so to speak. A sigh of relief escaped while imagining my new friend and I sitting back and chatting about the silliness of the whole situation. I slipped into the bathroom and emerged a new woman--Dani, champion of the cuddle party--dressed quite literally from head to toe in a set of boy's dark-blue footie pajamas, decorated with rocket ships and glow-in-the-dark stars. Skye and I matched perfectly, and as we entered the cuddle room, we were happily greeted by 20 other guests who were sitting haphazardly in a circle on a makeshift, pillow-laden bed. way, by any one, at any time," the facilitators asked the attendees to drop to all fours and begin crawling around the room like "magical cows in a mystical forest." As if things weren't awkward enough with a bunch of adults sitting around some random living room in pajamas, completely stone cold sober on a Sunday afternoon, now we had to act like cows, crawling around and mooing like idiots. I understood this to be an ice-breaking exercise to lead us into the next stage of the three-and-a-halfhour-long touch-fest, but all I wanted to break were my legs so Skye could quickly rush me out of the room and to the nearest hospital before anyone could touch me. But before I could crawl through the crowd to make a break for it, the cows had tipped to their sides and begun to cuddle. Cuddle Puddle I have had my fair share of physical and emotional intimacy. I have stumbled into intriguing and boundary-testing situations in places like Burning Man, yoga retreats, cocktail parties and even once at a Super Bowl party in my own living room. I have been strewn across a mattress in the "chill room" of a 1990s rave with complete strangers massaging my every muscle while I puffed away on menthol cigarettes. What sets these incidents apart from the format of a cuddle party is the lack of expectation, formal structure and, of course, the buffer of controlled substances. Entirely sober and surrounded by strangers, I couldn't read their minds and had no way of knowing if the generous offers of hand-holding held deeper intentions. I made for the bathroom, tripping over a penis pillow on the way and rummaging through my bag for the last time in hopes of discovering one last overlooked Xanax before I sucked it up, accepted my fate and returned to poor, dear Skye, who had managed to cram his body, in full fetal position, into the smallest corner of the room. If my body language was saying "Please don't touch me," Skye's read more like a serial killer ready to pull a chainsaw on the first person to even look at him. His open mind seemed to have gone on strike. I squeezed into the corner with him, observing the active and diverse scene. Young polyamorous couples took turns caressing the hair of those next to them. A middle-aged, six-foot-tall transgendered woman tangled herself up in the arms of a young, attractive South Asian immigrant man whose hands were groping the breasts of a thirty-something yoga instructor. And just when I grew comfortable enough to accept an offer of a foot rub from a married cuddle-party frequenter, I noticed my Safe Buddy, Mr. Purple Pants, groping and grinding a woman while they twisted their tongues in a fit of exhibitionist passion. (Apparently, I missed the "rule" stating that kissing, dry-humping and rubbing genitals are not sexual touch.) One of the rules did mention that attendees could get up and walk out at any time, but I was honestly too worried about calling attention to myself. I suddenly felt old-fashioned, boring and old. I just couldn't let go of my inhibitions like everyone else in the room. I felt an almost palpable wall building itself up around me as the partygoers continued to push their boundaries by allowing stranger's hands to wander and rub and caress in the most interesting ways. I was freaked and continued to nervously laugh and chat with anyone in the room who looked as horrified as I until an announcement came that the party was winding down. The facilitator invited everyone to join in for one last hurrah by piling up into a giant "cuddle puddle" for the remaining 20 minutes of the party. As Skye stood, paralyzed by the scene that played out before him, I made one last ditch effort to open my mind. I crawled around the circle and was invited to lay my head on the shoulder of the young South Asian man in the gender-bending three-way. I accepted and placed my head on his shoulder with my entire body on the outside of the circle, cold and constricted like an armadillo under attack. I attempted to relax into the moment. Relaxation never came. Magical Cows We began with introductions and a brief history of cuddle parties, before continuing on to rules. Despite my original assumption that cuddle parties arose from a West Coast commune after residents ingested one too many psychedelic mushroom caps, the parties actually originated on the East Coast. Founded in 2004 in New York by relationship coaches Reid Mihalko and Marcia Baczynski as a place for people of all genders and walks of life to explore touch in a safe, sober and structured environment, cuddle parties have gained popularity around the globe. There are several rules which include keeping clothing on at all times, being completely alcohol- and drug-free and only making physical contact after receiving a verbal yes to a specific and clear request to touch. There are also "cuddle lifeguards," who are trained co-facilitators placed onsite to ensure that everyone is comfortable and safe. After I'd recovered from the shock of discovering that kissing, groping and erections were all acceptable at the party, we quickly moved on to boundary-setting exercises, which revived my confidence and led me to practice giving an abundance of verbal no's. I proceeded to glide back and forth through the crowded room in my celestial jammies, repeating "No" over and over to nearly everyone in the room and their requests to touch, kiss or otherwise fondle me. I felt empowered, like I was sporting an invisible cape and shield to detour any unwanted advances with pride and dignity. This empowerment came to a screeching halt when, after a man in his late 50s excitedly shared that he had no touch boundaries and liked to be touched "in any I placed my head on his shoulder with my entire body on the outside of the circle, cold and constricted like an armadillo under attack. s we laughed and recapped the experience on our drive home, I realized that I had learned something fairly valuable during that party. While cuddle parties certainly provide the benefits of physical touch for those who may not regularly have access to affection for various reasons, I felt that this particular party was no more a practice in intimacy than the husband who refuses to be affectionate or sexual with his wife, yet forks over cash for sex or is otherwise promiscuous with strangers. The experience also confirmed in me that when it comes to affection and intimacy, I am indeed old-fashioned. I desire that sense of safety and closeness that comes from sustained relationships built on trust. And I will certainly never be attending a cuddle party again--at least, not without some hand-sanitizer and Valium on hand. The next North Bay cuddle party is planned for Feb. 20 in Sebastopol. To learn more, go to www.cuddleparty.com. 22 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN A cougar finds herself romanced on the dance floor. Observing the cougar mystique in action By Jessica Lussenhop n the eve of the first-ever National Cougar Convention, Richard Gosse, CEO of the San Rafael� based Single Professionals Society, was feeling a little tense. The event had sold out days prior, meaning an estimated 300 cougars--women 40 and older who prefer to date younger men--and cubs, the aforementioned younger men, were due to arrive in a mere 20 minutes. A sold-out party almost never happens, he told me, wolfing down a plate of food near the long greeting table at the entrance to the bar at Dinah's Garden Hotel in Palo Alto. "I'm working like a dog," he mumbled between forkfuls. Gosse, a self-described "singles advocate," says that ordinarily the single is a more elusive creature, one who never commits until the last second to attending mixers. That night, however, something very different was about to happen--tickets gone, international guests f lying in, media descending from as far away as New York City. "People are going to be trying to bust in here," he predicted. I decided to attend in part because I love the concept of a convention, a place where a single aspect of life is revealed in all its subtleties and nuances for a brief moment, like an exotic f lower that blooms for only one day. But what was so interesting about the cougar herself ? It felt sort of like a subculture at first. A whiff of sexual deviancy hung around the concept, and I, a mere millennial, intended to find out all its dirty little secrets. Once the cougars began to circulate aimlessly between the tiki-themed bar and the display booths for American Laser Centers and Cardeaux Cosmetics (maker of the "cougar kit"), no one was quite ready to talk seriously on the topic, least of all Leslie Lang. "I'm a standup comic," she said. "I came here for material." Her friends were a little more serious. "I want someone who doesn't want to go to bed at 10 o'clock," said Edith Espinola. "Men have been doing this for years. I think now it's our turn. They leave us no choice." "I like it," said their friend Amelia Wong, with deep sincerity. "Very passionate." On the cub side, it was hard to pry out an answer that went beyond "They know what they want" and "They don't play games," as if someone had given them cue cards on the way in. A smartly dressed Stanford student gave a very high-concept and barely understandable response. "I tend toward condescension and deference. It's a really nice combination," he said, and then went into some kind of carrot-peeling metaphor. He lost me after that. "Maybe the girls my age aren't taking care of their men the way they should," a stewed twenty-something told me a tad accusatorily. Between comments like his, which implied that all women in their 20s are "game players," and the idea that the husbands of these women had left them for someone in my age group, I was starting to feel like the enemy. The notion that I was part of an enemy camp increased once I began to gather how many suspect motivations were gathered in the room. In addition to the band from L.A. filming a reality TV installment for their website and the gaggle of students filming with palm-sized digital cameras for a "school project," there were oodles of media--the Associated Press, Details magazine, the San Francisco Chronicle and . . . me. When Lang grabbed the collar of a passing cub to lick his face or when a blonde whipped her black skirt too high up her leg, camera f lashes popped paparazzi-style. That's probably when things started to get a little weird. I was beginning to come up with a notso-nice answer to my original question: Why are we so interested in the cougar? From reading the accounts by my fellow journalists that came out afterward, the answer seems to be that we want to laugh at them. "Are you kidding me? Enter shudder, shake of head and look of pity and embarrassment for those participating women here," wrote one reporter for Examiner.com. "If I'm trying to get some 23-year-old mama's boy to go ice skating with me, please put me out of my misery," blogged a writer for the San Francisco Chronicle. The comments posted under a photo spread of the cougars are not reprintable, just vicious. Nevertheless, I did notice something at the crowning of Miss Cougar America. Each cub had been given a token to bestow upon his favorite cougar, but the vote tabulation process had the chaos of a livestock auction, with only three or four cougars able to hear above the din that it was time to cash in the tokens they'd collected from cubs. A 42year-old named Gloria Navarro ultimately took the title with 13 tokens, and was fairly shoved from the stage into an adjacent hallway for the ensuing media blitz. "Diane, I won!" she hollered to a friend. "I'm taking my friend Diane," she said of the single cougar cruise she'd won along with her new title. "She hung in there with me through my divorce. I was a soccer mom and now I'm a cougar!" And sure, she looked a little silly jumping up and down to Michael Jackson's "P " while party-crashing teens .Y.T. leapt in to have their photo taken with her. But she seemed to be having a really great time. `Maybe the girls my age aren't taking care of their men the way they should' It reminded me of the conversation I'd had earlier with Birgita Cameron and Rita Sangha, ambassador cougars from London who'd come in part to promote Sangha's cougar life-coaching business. "My longtime partner and I were together for 20 years. We had two children," Cameron said. "I broke it off and I lost my home. He also wouldn't let me see my children, and all sorts of things like that. It was really hard being on my own." "A lot of these women, their husbands left them in their 30s, 40s and 50s," Sangha added. "It can really knock your confidence." So maybe that's some people's definition of desperate. But watching these cougars--yes, behaving like girls; yes, with a serious amount of cleavage showing-- made the case for taking public action in the face of a host of forces telling you to just fade away. Staying home alone seemed like a more private and perhaps more dignified but ultimately sadder way to pass a Friday evening. Gosse told me at one point, "There are a lot of hot cougars out there. I've known this for decades." Since he won't say how old he is, I'm not entirely sure how far back the information-gathering goes, but the point is that ever since the invention of birth control, we've managed to turn our reproductive urges on their heads, so women in the sunset of their reproductive years should be able to party as long as they like. Even after being rolled in past relationships and marriages, cougars are still game to meet someone new. The sooner we get used to it, the sooner a cougar convention or a night at home with a quart of H�agen-Dazs might cease to be the only two options. At the tail end of the evening, I ran into Espinola again, now a little tipsy but clearly having a lovely time. Though the cubs and party crashers were making the scene increasingly ugly, Espinola at least made me feel a great deal better about the presence of the press. "I met this great guy, his name is Chris, he's a reporter covering the story," she said. "We exchanged numbers both ways. I'll probably call him on Monday or Tuesday." The first-ever Sonoma County Cougar Party is slated for Thursday, Feb. 25, at the Last Day Saloon. 120 Fifth St., Santa Rosa. 7pm�9pm. $10. 415.407.9962. THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 23 Three different approaches to online loving By Curtis Cartier, Morgan Carvajal, and Daniel Hirsch A Good, Honest Affair When it comes to the business of cheating, Noel Biderman is boss. His website AshleyMadison.com--named, he says, after the two most popular monikers for baby girls--functions like any other dating site, with profiles, searches, messages and photos. But at Biderman's site, the dating pool comes with baggage: namely girlfriends, boyfriends, wives and husbands. "We offer a good, honest affair. Guaranteed," says site president and founder Biderman, a husband of seven years and father of two. "We're no eHarmony, that's for sure." AshleyMadison, Biderman says, is a place where people can go to fulfill needs that aren't being met at home, a human buffet line where all the dishes know they'll never be the main course. Users and fans say it's a website that makes open what's happening in secret on dating sites already. Critics say it's an online cesspool that breeds infidelity, a 24/7 computerized home-wrecking service that should be shut down for good. Biderman says they just wish they'd thought of it first. "We looked at data that showed 30 percent of the people on other dating sites were cheating or looking to cheat," Biderman says, speaking from his New York office. "We thought to ourselves that all these people posing as single is risky. Why not come to a community where people can confess that they're looking to cheat? We're creating an honest community for cheating." Biderman's "honest community" was launched in 2001 and now boasts more than 5.2 million users. A media-savvy seeker of controversy, the well-dressed, balding 38-yearold has braved booing from audiences on The View and The Tyra Banks Show to plug his site and preach his "it's only sex" spiel. The cavalier gentlemen's-club approach translates to the online dynamic. On the site, women play mostly for free. Guys buy "credits" that are used for sending digital "gifts" to other users and accessing private data. Everyone creates a profile that lists a photo, some stats on appearance and a list of things they're into: spanking, threesomes, schoolgirl outfits or Polynesian albinos in football pads. A juicier collection of pics and stats are available when a user sends someone a "key" that provides access to his or her "private showcase." "Brie," a 32-year-old wife of five years, says she joined because things just weren't working out at home. "To me, it was either this or get a divorce. And getting a divorce is more drastic," says the woman, who asked that her real name not be used. "I wanted an alpha male, someone who really gets it done. I don't think my husband suspects." Noel Biderman sure knows how to treat the ladies. Brie says she met her current fling six months ago. Before that, her dalliances amounted to "kissing a few guys, but that's it." The man, she says, is older and married as well. Their dates typically consist of dinner and drinks followed by a motel-room pit stop, then a long, occasionally guilt-ridden ride home to their spouses. "It can't go on forever," she admits. "It's fun while it lasts, though." Biderman insists that cheating can be a sort of marriage therapy and that American culture puts too much importance on monogamy, which he maintains is "against our DNA." As lovers nationwide stock up on chocolates and flowers for Valentine's Day, adulterers on AshleyMadison will be stocking up on motel reservations and alibis for the day prior, one Biderman heralds as "Mistress Day." Of course, philandering men and scandalous women have been around a lot longer than Biderman and AshleyMadison.com. "There are millions of people that are suffering through a sexless marriage," Biderman says. "I say, don't go visit a prostitute, don't lie to someone else about whether you're married or not. If you need that sexual element, come to AshleyMadison, and you can get it."--C.C. each other without exposing their personal information. Potential members have to be "vouched for" by another user in order to gain full access to the site's functions and other member's profiles, or personas. Blackbox won't release its exact membership count, but they claim to be well over a thousand and growing. Their heaviest member areas are Portland, Seattle and the Bay Area. Blackbox allows members to talk freely about sex and lust in ways that other social networking sites, like Facebook, don't. A sliding bar allows users to make moment-to-moment updates on changing preferences, which makes for a freeing sense of unfastening your sexuality. Site founders label Blackbox as a second Facebook, and are open to criticism of its content. The site is so fresh that founders are looking for feedback to set it apart from other networking sites. The set-up and navigation are very similar to Facebook, but I found the content and social acceptance offered is very different. Logging in meant poking around for a few hours on stranger's sites and reading public conversations about Avatar and Lady Gaga. One user pointed out her ability to use the word "cock" freely, but admitted her dismay at not being able to connect locally for off-line dating purposes. Moreover, Blackbox doesn't serve those looking for a committed relationship; its edgy and racy content instead is all about people who just want to get naked online. The site is still trying to figure out whether it will water the seed of sexually over-explicit content, or flirt with a sexually conservative user. Being in a committed relationship made me an unlikely person to join Blackbox, or so I thought. I soon found that the temptation to discover more about the site was irresistible, and I met some interesting and entertaining people in my few weeks of registration. Because the site really can't generate meetups, it is easy to share fantasies here without the threat of being tracked down. Blackbox provides a personalized corkboard is an original way to help describe "you." My corkboard says that I'm a colorful hippie with a love for such natural lakes as Tahoe. The lollipop image on my corkboard, which I meant as a girly detail of my personality, was mistaken by site members as a phallic symbol, and provoked some tainted interpretations. An image could truly lead to anything on this erotic site.--M.C. Love in the Time of Robots Did you know that women are nearly twice as likely to respond positively to an unsmiling man as a smiling one? That a greater percentage of people in California would date someone just for sex than in South Carolina? That nonwhite men are around 8 percent more likely to respond to a woman's advances than white men? If you're an avid reader of OkTrends, the math geek blog from the programmers of the online dating website OkCupid.com, you'd be able to rattle off these statistics and more. But can understanding these numbers and statistics actually lead to love? As a new member to OKCupid, I'm still sorting that question out. Since 2006, OkCupid has been one of the fastest growing dating websites around. Today it has over 1 million members in the United States and abroad. Part of the site's appeal may be that, unlike eHarmony.com Private & Social A site that's horny but high in spirit, BlackboxRepublic.com is built on an idea that today's single men and women are always changing sexually and looking for something new. Blackbox's goal is to help people find other members who want the same things they do--and right now. Marketing to sex-positive people, this alternative social networking site is striving to develop a successful dating reputation. Based in Portland, Ore., the site came online about a month ago. Blackbox is a private social networking site, where names and personal information are not shared with other users. Luring what are called "followers" is how site members get to know or Match.com, it's a completely free service. Furthermore, there's a playful irreverence in OkCupid's operation, making it marginally amusing for online dating newbies like me. Rather than relying on the professional personality assessment tests of other online dating sites, OkCupid takes a casual approach with personality quizzes that you might find in the back of Seventeen, stuff like "The Nerd, Geek or Dork Test" or the "The Which Character of True Blood Are You Test." Matches are based on how you respond to these various quizzes and how important you rate the desired response from an ideal match. The whole process of finding a date through OkCupid involves lots and lots of math. Through a complex statistical process using members' answers to these quizzes site recommends potential matches. On the site, OkCupid includes an article called "Frequently Asked for Answers About Questions" that details the algorithms it uses. It's a statement of operations that would make any statistics professor clutch his chalk in excitement. In its recently inaugurated OkTrends blog, the site's programmers revel in the massive amounts of data they've gathered. A recent post examined the facial expressions of 500,000 OkCupid members and analyzed their relative rate of receiving messages from other members. Turns out women who use the quintessentially cheesy "MySpace shot" for their profile picture--the one with the arm outstretched holding the camera above the face with pouting lips and out-thrust chest--get much more new messages from men then women pictured holding pets, having fun with friends or lying in bed. As if to underline the insistent presence of math and stats in its match-making, OkCupid features a gray mechanized mascot with a patch of little red pixels where a heart should be, aptly named Staff Robot. If you're like me, the idea of outsourcing your romantic endeavors to a robot sounds vaguely dystopian. I've always been someone who worries about how we give too much power to machines and systems and not enough to chance and human intuition. But over the last year, I've had more and more friends say they've had positive experiences using OkCupid. They've gone on dates, they've had great sex, they've been in longterm, meaningful relationships. Keep in mind, these are young, attractive, socially well-adjusted people in their 20s. Online dating isn't just for perverts anymore. As more of our lives go online, it suddenly doesn't seem that weird to have our romantic lives there as well. Given that so many of my friends had given themselves over to the OkCupid's bots, I decided to try it out, more out of curiosity than anything else. In my few months on, I've messaged and been messaged. Staff Robot has suggested some good-looking matches and some less good-looking ones. For the past week, I've been in an exchange with a girl who seems an excellent match, according to both OkCupid's and my own judgment. We've even had some half-decent online repartee. Have we met in person? Though we have tentative plans to maybe make plans to make plans, nothing has materialized yet. Though the robots might offer good tips for flirting and suggest potential matches, it seems like it still takes human effort to seal the deal. At least, until they invent a machine to do that for us.--D.H. 24 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Narrow Way are giving the show its North Bay premiere. "We can't wait to share this show with as many people as we can," says McCloud, who plays the role of Sharky, an ex-con who's returned home seeking a measure of redemption, only to find himself pitted against the devil in the form of Mr. Lockhart, who once won Sharky's soul in a card game and has finally arrived to collect. SEBASTOPOL COMMUNITY CULTURAL CENTER Sat. Feb. 13th 9:00pm UPCOMING CONCERTS AT THE Dance Concert � very limited seating $20 advanced / $23 door A Bluegrass interpretation of `Dark Side of the Moon' w/ special guest Aaron Redner of Hot Buttered Rum on fiddle; liquid lights, Wizard of Oz movie, and costumes From left: Keith Baker, Matt Withauss, Ed McCloud, Neil Thollander and Freddy Lambert. The devil is flawed, he's sad, he's lonely and he's weirdly noble. "As a performer myself," says McCloud, "I can't wait to dig into this play with an audience, to go for the ride, to see what we can discover about these characters. The second act, especially, where we play the big poker game--it's a huge challenge to carry off onstage, to sell it and bring to life in a way that the story demands, but I can't wait to see what our audiences do. It's so much fun, so incredibly intense, this whole play." "It turns out it's not easy to play poker onstage," offers Keith Baker, who plays the part of Lockhart. After playing the devil last year in Sixth Street Playhouse's Possession of Mrs. Jones, this marks Baker's second consecutive turn as the Prince of Darkness, and he's been enjoying the opportunity to explore different aspects of the iconic character. "So I'm playing the devil at the same time I'm playing poker, and doing an Irish accent, while everybody else is playing it drunk while playing poker and doing Irish. And in the middle of it all, they're battling me for their souls. There's a lot of stuff going on in this show, which is what makes it so much fun." Adds McCloud: "This play isn't as well known as some of McPherson's other plays [The Weir, Shining City, Dublin Carol], but there are so many wonderful themes interwoven into this show--faith, family, addiction, redemption, living with `sinful' deeds of your past, deciding how you are going to face up to your destiny. It's all such juicy stuff--and it's incredibly funny, because McPherson is such a good writer. I think this play will come to be seen as a masterpiece down the road. I have no doubt about that. "The key to the play, for me," he continues, "is the scene where Lockhart describes what Hell is like--total separation from everyone else, complete isolation. In this play, these crazy drunken Irish guys are able to accomplish the opposite of that--real human connection with each other. We, as humans, can experience what the devil will never have: companionship with each other." "Poor Lucifer," Kniffin laughs. "Poor, poor Lucifer." `The Seafarer' runs Thursdays�Sundays, Feb. 12�28, at the Spreckels Performing Arts Center, 5409 Snyder Lane in Rohnert Park. 8pm. $10� $20. 707.588.3400. RAY WYLIE HUBBARD & MARY GAUTHIER Fri. Feb. 26th 8:00pm Premium tickets $30; General tickets $25adv / $28 door A dynamic duo double bill with two incredible singer-songwriters, both raw, witty, edgy... V�SEN - Mar. 5th 8:00pm Premium Tickets - $25; General $20 adv/$23 door From Sweden, "...the best band in the world." The devil comes down to Dublin in Narrow Way's `Seafarer' By David Templeton n literature and in plays, whenever the devil appears, there is usually something very human about him as a character," observes actor-turned-director Tim McKniffin. "In The Seafarer, I think that is especially true. As written by Conor McPherson, the devil is flawed, he's sad, he's lonely and he's weirdly noble. But he's also definitely the villain, and you still want him to lose in the end." Kniffin, best known for his roles in Cinnabar Theater's Enchanted April, Aurora Theatre's Best Man, Sixth Street Playhouse's In the Mood and others, is directing The Seafarer for Narrow Way Stage Company, a fast-rising company whose reputation for smart, funny, obscenity-fueled plays was been built on shows like this one. For his first time directing a full-length production, Kniffin has assembled a cast of Narrow Way regulars (Freddy Lambert, Neil Thollander), up-and-comers (Matt Withauss) and two of the most highly regarded actors in the North Bay: Ed McCloud (True West, Midsummer Night's Dream) and Keith Baker (The Scene, The Three Musketeers). The play, which premiered in Dublin in 2006, involves a pair of roguish Irish brothers, their unruly band of whiskeyfriendly associates, and one wild all-night poker game on Christmas Eve to which the Devil is accidentally invited. Both epic in scope and intensely intimate, the play is quickly becoming a staple for small regional theater companies around the globe. With its upcoming three-weekend production at Spreckels Performing Arts Center, Kniffin and All concerts at: Sebastopol JOHN GORKA & PATTY LARKIN - Mar. 12 ALTAN - Mar. 21 OPEN HOUSE REUNION APR. 9 Community Cultural Center Tickets & info: 707-823-1511 www.cumuluspresents.com People's Music, Last Record Store FUNCTIONAL ART wo ti amoie ni Je t'aime konoronhkwa Doostat d aram Just say... I Love You, s'agapo Bahibik miluji te fine & fashion jewelry beautiful handmade gifts supporting local artists since 1999 VALENTINE 146 N. Main St., Sebastopol 707.829.3036 ~ Daily 10:30 to 6:00pm, Sunday til 5:00pm www.artisanafunctionalart.com 25 THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 paid advertising section The Bazzaar Quality handmade art & goods made exclusively in Sonoma County! 52 Mission Plaza Ste. 123, Santa Rosa a t , 707.537.9454 | bazzaar.rpweb.com Contemporary/Museum Framing Conceptual Art Gallery 707.473.9600 707.474.9600 www.hammerfriar.com Contemporary Japanese Prints 707.875.2922 1781 Hwy 1, Bodega Bay www.renbrown.com RIVERFRONT ART GALLERY Sebastopol Gallery 150 N. Main St. Sebastopol, CA 707.829.7200 Daily 11-6 132 PETALUMA BLVD. NORTH, DOWNTOWN PETALUMA WWW.RIVERFRONTARTGALLERY.COM 707-778-4ART(4278) sebastopol-gallery.com Greatful Dead Memorabilia 110 North Main St., Sebastopol, CA Around the World email@example.com O Locally Made: treehouse 28 clothing 707.829.ROCK (7625) O Artwork, Collectibles & More O Fine Gems & Minerals from Call Today to Advertise! 707.527.1200 | email@example.com 26 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Christopher Plummer and Helen Mirren portray Tolstoy and his wife after 50 years of marriage. `The Last Station' tells the `Lear'-like story of Tolstoy's final days By Richard von Busack ne seeks the truth; one cherishes idealism. And yet truth and idealism make uncomfortable bedfellows. The problem of Leo Tolstoy's end is scoped out in Michael Hoffman's Last Station, based on Jay Parini's 1990 novel. Nominated for two Oscars for supporting actor and lead actress, Station is an interesting, very well cast, visually pleasant yet strangely toneless film about two sets of lovers who find idealism coming between them. Circa 1910 in Moscow, Valentin (James McAvoy, once again playing a callow young person out of his depth) is recruited by one Vladimir Chertkov (Paul Giamatti). Chertkov is the head of the Tolstoy society, dedicated to carrying out the author's reformist ideas regarding celibacy and manual labor. Valentin's job will be to live on Tolstoy's commune, carry a notebook and record the great man's thoughts. Tolstoy (Christopher Plummer), the most famous writer on earth, is enjoying a sort of Indian summer, watching his small farm bloom and receiving the adulation of the world. But the count's countess--Sofya, his wife of nearly 50 years, played by Helen Mirren--has tired of her husband's utopian politics. And as the mother of more than a dozen children, she is terrified by the old man's desire to give all of his possessions away. Chertkov, very much the curlymustached, perfumed parlor snake, is engineering a deal to put War and Peace in the public domain so that the suffering world may have it for free. Meanwhile, Valentin's desire to stay pure and virginal is sorely tested by a saucy, experienced woman on the commune, Masha (Kerry Condon). Outfitted with the requisite beard, Plummer plays Tolstoy with the gusto of a ham-loving actor tackling Fiddler on the Roof. Plummer has a particularly moving scene describing his long-ago courtship with his wife, and there are juicy scenes of the old couple going after one another in bed and out of bed. But what wife can bear hearing her husband described as a saint, a new Jesus? Cameramen--paparazzi, before there was such a thing--watch the spatting between the Tolstoys and record it all for posterity. This view of Tolstoy, emphasizing the naive sweetness and the common-man heartiness, produces affection but doesn't fathom the deeper meanings of this story. Hearing of Tolstoy's renunciation and its consequences, one thinks of Lear. And one wouldn't be the first, either: George Orwell wrote a famous essay comparing Tolstoy's hatred of King Lear to Tolstoy's Lear-like folly in divesting himself of his property before he actually died. Orwell's point--that some forms of sacrifice disguise a covert power play--eludes Hoffman. He gives us Tolstoy as a cracked, principled old grandfather, manipulated by outsiders. We also don't get any sense of why a sensitive man would want his hands clean in the Russia of the day. We hear that the filthy peasants are out there being filthy, but we don't see them in their muck or understand who buried them there. The Last Station's charming greenery and white birches could be ornamenting some exceptionally gilded-by-hindsight memoir: speak, memory, maybe. `The Last Station' opens on Friday, Feb. 12, at the Rialto Cinemas Lakeside, 551 Summerfield Road, Santa Rosa. 707.525.4840. THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 27 New Movies WINNER � BEST ACTOR NOW PLAYING AIRPORT STADIUM 12 LAKESIDE Windsor (707) 522-0330 RIALTO CINEMAS Santa Rosa (707) 525-4840 throughout January! purchase over $200 Also Playing 1601 Fourth St, San Rafael 415-456-6237 www.bohemian.com www.bohemian .bohemian.com www.bohemian.com www.bohemian.com 28 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN E X T E N D E D 2 Academy Award Nominations Including Academy Award Nominee Best Foreign Language Film! Best Actress � Helen Mirren! "Raw and Riveting!" � Rolling Stone (1:00) 2:45 5:00 7:20 9:45 R (1:30) 4:15 6:50 9:15 R (12:30) 3:00 5:00 7:00 9:15 R 3 Academy Noms Nominations! 2 Academy AwardAwardIncluding Best Actor! "A Triumph!" WRESTLER Observer CRAZY HEART THE � New York (1:45) VIE EN ROSER (12:20) 2:45 5:10 7:30 9:45 R LA 4:30 7:00 9:30 (12:45) 3:45 6:45 Nominee! Academy Award 9:45 PG-13 Bargain Tuesday - $7.50 All Shows Bargain Tuesday 12th - All Feb 18th $7.00 Schedule for Fri, Feb -20th � Thu,Shows 26th Schedule for Fri, June 22nd - Thu, June 28th I N T H E G K H A R D T T H E AT R E WALTZ WITH BASHIR THE LAST STATION A MIGHTY HEART 10 Academy Award Noms Including Best Picture! A SINGLE MAN " SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE � � Really, Truly, Deeply (2:45)of7:20 Year'sR No 7:20pm Show Thu One (1:15)9:40 7:10 9:40Newsday This 4:00 Best!" � R 3 Academy Award Nominations! ONCE 8 Academy Award Noms Including THE YOUNG VICTORIA (1:00) 3:10 5:20 & Best Director! Best Picture, Best Actor7:30 9:40 R MILK Please Note: No 1:30 Show Sat, No 6:45 Show Thu (12:20) 5:10 PG No 5:10pm Show Thu 6 Academy Award Nominations! "Wise, Humble and Effortlessly Funny!" � Newsweek (1:30) 4:10 6:45 9:30 R Love, redemption and faith are tested in this Norwegian film showing Feb. 12 and 14 at the Sonoma Film Institute. See Film, p37. (1:30) 4:00 7:10 9:30 R 5 Academy Award Noms Including Best Picture! PRECIOUS WAITRESS (1:20) 6:40 R THE (2:15) 7:20 R HURT LOCKER "Swoonly Romatic, Mysterious, Hilarious!" �(4:00) Magazine Slant 9:00 R THE IMAGINARIUM OF DR PARNASSUS PURE: A BOULDERING FLICK (3:15) 10:00 Feb 26th at 7:15 Show Wed Michael No 3:15pm Thu, PG-13Moore's 5:45 R Starts Fri, June 29th! Fri, Sat, Sun & Mon Advance Tickets IN Sale Now at Box Office! MOVIES On THE MORNING FROZEN RIVER Sat, Sun & Mon Mornings 9:50 AM (12:00) 2:30 5:00 7:30 10:00 Fri, 10:15 AM VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA 10:10 AM THE YOUNG VICTORIA 10:20 AM CHANGELING 10:20 AM INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS (No Show Sat) Venessa Redgrave Meryl Streep Glenn Close 10:40 AM RACHEL GETTING MARRIED 10:30 AM THE HURT LOCKER 2009 LIVE ACTION EVENING 10:40 AM A SERIOUS MAN SHORTS (Fri/Mon Only)) 10:45 AM 10:45 AM 2009 Starts Fri, June 29th! 10:45 AM UP ANIMATED SHORTS (Sun Only) Kevin Jorgenson presents the California Premiere of 9 Academy Award Nominations! FROST/NIXON AN EDUCATION PARIS, 4:45T'AIME (11:45) JE 9:50 R (1:00) 7:50 4:15 7:00 1pm Show Wed (1:15) PG-13 No 9:30 R A SERIOUS MAN SICKO MOVIES IN THE MORNING REVOLUTIONARY ROAD HANK IS A SMASH HIT! HI T! 3 PERFORMANCES ADDED FEB 11, 12, 13 AT 8PM O N S TA G E N O W TA VALENTINE'S DAY SHOW VALENTINE'S DAY SH A February 14 at 8pm Tix $ Tix $14 i S P E C I A L E V E N T CELEBRATIO CELEBRATION AT ON Februar y February 18 tix $25. Opening with g 5TH BIRTHDAY BIRTHDAY DA THE JEB B RAD Y BAND at 7pm BRADY B AND Featuring Featuring 6TH STREET PLAYHOUSE PLAY OUSE AYHO THE SHANNON RIDER BAND R IDER B AND Music. Dancing. Food. Fun. Fun. C O M I N G S O O N Film capsules by Richard von Busack and Eloy Camacho. FOR NORTH BAY MOVIE TIMES, GO TO www.sonomamovietimes.com www.marinmovietimes.com www.napamovietimes.com Women's Health Specialists confidential compassionate nonjudgmental More Than Just Health Care... Starring Liz Jahren Starring Liz Jahren ("Louise" from Always...Patsy Cline) y as Mae West Feb 26 thru Mar 21 as Mae West Feb 26 thru Mar 21 n Thu/Fri/Sat at 8PM, Sat & Sun at 2PM 707.537.1171 www.cawhs.org www.6thstreetplayhouse www.6thstreetplayhouse.com e.com Box Office 707 523-4185 ext 1 52 W6th St Santa Rosa CA 9 95401 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN 29 the last day saloon nightclub & restaurant DON'T FORGET...WE SERVE FOOD TOO! Dinner and a Show Reservations advised HAPPY HOUR M�F � 4�6PM EST. 1941 Take a scenic drive for a unique dining experience 20 min from downtown Petaluma, 25 min from everywhere else! Mc Near's Dining House Breakfast � Lunch � Dinner BBQ � Pasta � Steak FRI 2/12 � 7:00PM DOORS � $23 ADV/$25 DOS � 18+ SINGER/SONGWRITER the best place for live music, dancing and dining THE BAR AND RESTAURANT OPENS ON ALL SHOW DAYS AT 4 PM Valentine's Weekend Fri Feb 12 Sat Rancho Debut! Hot Latin Jazz Fusion Dance Band 8:30pm 8:30pm Special Valentine Songs BAUTISTA 2/11 9:30 PM SHOW > $6/8 > REGGAE ROCK Feb 13 Sun TOMMY CASTRO BAND LOUDON WAINWRIGHT III PLUS SOLID AIR SAT 2/13 � 7:00PM DOORS � $15 � 16+ ROCK PION 2 ZION + BLUESHIFT + DJ DISTRUST Feb 14 MIKE LIPSKIN & DINAH LEE 4:00pm / In the Bar Enjoy a Romantic Evening with 2/12 9:00 PM SHOW > $15/20 > MALE DANCERS HAVE A GIRLS NIGHT OUT 7:30pm Fri SPECIAL VALENTINE'S DAY MENU THE BAGUETTE QUARTETTE THE LOST BOYS WITH CLOVERLEAF DRIVE THURS 2/18 � ALL AGES � FREE ALL STAR JAM + RAFFLE CALIFORNIA BAD BOYZ COME DANCE AFTER THE SHOW (NO COVER) BIG BEN AND HIS SNAKEOIL SAVIORS Feb 19 Original Western Swing Sat Feb 20 Sun Sun 8:30pm Special Luau Buffet WILLIE K WITH AVI RONEN & JOE CANO "Hands of Fire" 8:30pm High Octane Americana 4:00pm Unplugged! 8:00pm / In the Bar Dance to 2/13 9:30 PM SHOW > $13/15 > ROCK DINE, DANCE, DONATE BENEFIT FOR HAITI RELIEF www.restaurantshelpinghaiti.com FRI 2/19 � 8:00PM DOORS � $25 ADV/$30 DOS � 21+ REGGAE FRANK HANNON (LEAD GUITARIST BAND FROM TESLA) + LUVPLANET + 21 GRAMS Feb 21 HOUSTON JONES Feb 26 DANNY UZILEVSKY Sat Feb 27 THE 85'S Sun THE KINGDOM OF ZION TOUR 2/16 ALBOROSIE & THE SHENGEN CLAN SAT 2/20 � 7:00PM DOORS � $20 BALCONY/$25 FLOOR � 16+ COMEDY 5:30 PM MARCH > 6:30 PM SHOW $7/10 > NEW ORLEANS R&B FUNK 80's Party Band! 8:30pm "Redneck Mother" Legend 7:30pm I-10 MUSIC SERIES PRESENTS Feb 28 RAY WYLIE HUBBARD 415.662.2219 MARDI GRAS PARTY WITH RHYTHMTOWN-JIVE FEATURING MIKE RINTA + PARADE AROUND RAILROAD SQUARE On the Town Square, Nicasio www.ranchonicasio.com LOOKING FOR INTELLIGENT LIFE TOUR GALLAGHER SUN 2/21 � 7:30PM DOORS � $25 � ALL AGES FUNK/BLUES/HIP HOP 2/18 8:30 PM SHOW > $10/12 > ROCK HALESTORM + ADELITAS WAY + 26 MPH G LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE WITH REDEYE EMPIRE TUE 2/23 � 7:00PM DOORS � $30 ADV/$32 DOS � 18+ JAZZ 2/19 8:30 PM SHOW > $15/18 > BLUES AN EVENING WITH MEDESKI MARTIN AND WOOD WED 2/24 � 7:00PM DOORS � $25 � 21+ FOLK/BLUES I-10 MUSIC SERIES PRESENTS "AUSTIN'S GODFATHER OF R&B" W.C. CLARK + BILL NOTEMAN & THE ROCKETS 2/20 Rebel Lion Productions PRESENTS 9:30 PM SHOW > $10/12 > REGGAE JORMA KAUKONEN PLUS GE SMITH SUN 2/28 � 8:00PM DOORS � $25 � 21+ JAM BAND BAMBU STATION from the Virgin Islands (CHRIS BERRY TRIO) WITH SPECIAL GUEST CB-3 2/24 8:30 PM SHOW > $10 > BLUES I-10 MUSIC SERIES PRESENTS STEVE KIMOCK TUE 3/2 � 7:00PM DOORS � $20 � 21+ ACOUSTIC/JAZZ/NU-JAZZ THE INSOMNIACS all shows are 21+ unless noted for reservations: 707.545.5876 ACOUSTIC ALCHEMY For All Ages Shows � No Children Under 10 Allowed 23 Petaluma Blvd, Petaluma 707.545.2343 120 5th street @ davis street santa rosa, ca 707-765-2121 www.mcnears.com 30 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN lastdaysaloon.com It wasn't enou gh for the mem bers of Poor M enough to lear an's Whiskey to n the entire 10 cover "Bohem minutes of "Fre their all-time no ian Rhapsody." ebird." No, the velty high by re It wasn't Santa Rosa strin cording an entir of the Moon. W g band finally e bluegrass versi ith innovative reached on of Pink Floy arrangements classic album is d's opus, Dark and three-part more artistic th Side harmonies, the an humorous, record's most en Poor Man's take although this w during spawns on the eekend they ac : laser-light show The Wizard of Oz knowledge tw s and the dubi . The venue will o of the ous but entert be decked out Man, the Cowa aining connectio in Oz d�cor, th rdly Lion and th n to e band membe e Scarecrow, an cultural onslaug rs dressed like d revelers can ex ht under a haze the Tin perience multip of laser-kissed the Moonshine in le meta-levels of fog when Poor its entirety with Man's Whiskey an all-ages show Center. 390 M perform Dark on Saturday, Fe orris St., Sebasto Side of b. 13, at the Seba pol. 8:15pm. $2 stopol Commun 0�23. 707.823.15 ity 11. Great Gig in the Sky valentine, vase of roses, the handmade . The dinner reservation, the e Usher. There's just one got it all perfectly planned You've Teddy, some Luther, som why, on stereo primed with some ine's night workout. That's the box of chocolates. The ess warm-up for your Valent that's a good, hearty fitn take note! Ramp up thing left, and ba-Thon for Haiti. Lovers, to Monroe Hall hosts its Zum (ary) by bouncing around Valentine's Day morning, for your evening's mission ing those in need! Train loat while sending f that cardio while help ified gender on a Carnavale a Brazilian person of unspec inception born from favela booty beats! Feel like "sprung" wood f loor and need! With its resilient spend two hours huffing assistance down to those in e Hall is the perfect spot to lion bucks, Red Cross in WWI, Monro fundraising for the afterwards feeling like a mil , salsa and more. Go home , Feb. 14, at Monroe Hall. fing to cumbia, merengue and puf y for love on Sunday t Old Spice and you're read take a shower, splash on tha n. 707.570.0670. 0am�12:30pm. $15 donatio ta Rosa. 10:3 1400 W. College Ave., San Get Ready for Love Amour Cosmopolitan Long drives through the rolling hills of West Marin can be utterly romantic on a clear night, and never more so than after having dinner and dancing to the Baguette Quartette. One of the first hotjazz ensembles to hit the Bay Area, the group has been featured on NPR's All Things Considered and Putumayo's French Caf� compilation for its authentic blowback to the espresso-and-Gauloises music of 1920s Paris. You might have even noticed their music in the smash-hi t animated feature Monsters, Inc. Such exposure doesn't come without hard work, and since the early 1990s, the Quartette have been building their vast repertoire and honing their chops with Django Reinhard t tunes, valse musette styles, foxtrots, tangos and more. A special Valentine's Day dinner menu from the roadhouse's acclaimed kitchen will be in effect, and with European melodies in the air, romance should prevail on Sunday, Feb. 14, at Rancho Nicasio. Town Square, Nicasio. 7:30pm. $15. 415.662.2 219. e God. Mal ' Oh. My. Bad Boyz. mixer that fornia singles . The `Cali ur stupid TiVos watching s about yo n this f lyer weekend Who care ese guys o ok at th and the with me! tine's Day en dana come d Taylor, lo one on Val ith the ban r. ou have to Oh my go at home al o Suave, w tally go. Y s instructo not sitting y. Total Ric the fitnes ers. Let's to stripp ht out. I'm w about the right, k at this gu ig o ok, ho ree to is is girl's n elf. Here, lo the one th long? Or lo on night?! Th rry for mys r way too ocal Moti your type, d feeling so u dated fo hair and L ther guy's . This o y gelled of Days an Shut iet guy yo him ins d long. 7 with m drey'd like er that Atk two hours t from 198 rosary. Au ! Rememb k look. 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I won , at the Las . 12 Friday, Feb The Men THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 31 Wed, Feb 10 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45 Jazzercise 10am-12:15pm Scottish Dance Youth and Family 7:00-10:00pm Singles & Pairs Square Dance Club Thur, Feb 11 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45 Jazzercise 7:25�10:30pm Circles N' Squares Square Dance Club Fri, Feb 12 8:45-9:45am Jazzercise 7:30pm California Ballroom presents an Evening pf Ballroom, Latin, Swing & Nightclub Dancing Sat, Feb 13 8:00-9:00am; 9:15-10:15am Jazzercise 10:30-11:45am Salsa Workout with DJ Steve Luther 7:00pm Victoria Strowbridge hosts n HEARTS FOR HAITI BENEFIT with Congolese, West African, Brazilian and Haitian Dance Classes & Performances Sun, Feb 14 8:30-9:30am Jazzercise 10:30am�12:30pmZumbathon to Benefit Haiti Relief 10 Local Zumba Instructors, hosted by with Anna $10 donation suggested 1:30�3:30pm Vintage Dance 5:00�9:30pm DJ Steve Luther Country-Western Lessons & Dancing $10 Mon, Feb 15 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45pm Jazzercise 3:30pm WEIGHTWATCHERS MEETING Weigh in 3:30, Meeting 4:00 7:00-10:00pm Scottish Country Dancing Tues, Feb 16 8:45-9:45am; 5:45-6:45pm Jazzercise 9:30am WEIGHTWATCHERS MEETING Weigh in 9:30, Meeting 10:00 7:15-9:00pm AFRICAN DANCE with Victoria Strowbridge featuring West African & Congolese Dance Concerts Santa Rosa's Social Hall since 1922 1400 W. College Avenue � Santa Rosa, CA 707.539.5507 � www.monroe-hall.com Clubs Coyote Den Bar & Dance Hall Twice As Good Saturday, February 20th � 8pm Rockin' Blues Memphis Exchange � Country Saturday, February 27th � 8pm California Cowboys � Country Saturday, March 6th � 8pm Thursday Night KARAOKE � 8:30pm Five $20 Free Play Drawings 5 miles North of Ukiah, Hwy 101 � West Road Exit, Ukiah 707-485-0700 � www.coyotevalleycasino.com 32 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Yeasayer's `Odd Blood' is a futuristic dance-pop adventure magine '80s R&B Miami-bass dance crooner Stevie B. taking a bath with Grizzly Bear while listening to Violator on a battery-powered boom box, and you get an idea of Yeasayer's groove. Based in hot-spot Brooklyn, Yeasayer embrace dance-pop beats and that yelping, plaintive falsetto style singing � la Depeche Mode's Martin Gore that made me quiver as a teen without the slightest hint of irony. Some might call their style empty. Some might call it something you can bounce to in a slick hipster club. Some might call it something to be dropped into the nearest trashcan, next to scratched singles of Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up." But if anything, Odd Blood can be held up as a prime specimen of the digital and live instrumentation possibilities enabled by 21st-century technology. Officially leaked on the internet last fall, the album's exuberant, electro-pop first single sets the stage for the bubbly, beat-infused energy that informs most of their newer songs. Driven by the soaring yelps of multiinstrumentalist and vocalist Anand Wilder, "Ambling Alps" is anthemic and rousing. Conversely, "Madder Rose" kicks off with a melancholy chorus of voices, rising to the sky, and mixes a nice out-for-blood darkness with shimmering bass lines and electronic bells. Admittedly, Yeasayer can be an acquired taste. The band's tagline is "Enya with bounce," and on songs like "I Remember," with baldly sincere lyrics concerned with love and longing and making love on airplanes, their electronic bells backed by watery quavering keyboards do conjure a certain quality similar to the Celtic chanteuse. Even more caution: a boy-band strain runs through songs like "O.N.E.," which boasts a bumping bass groove punctuated by slick synth flourishes. Justin Timberlake fans may find themselves flashing back to the days of learning to kiss on their `N Sync pillows when hearing the lovelorn harmonies of "Love Me Girl," which declares "Don't give up on me / And I won't give up on you / I gotta wait for the baby," followed by the sampled squawks of jungle birds. In a recent interview on JamBase.com, Wilder explains the name "odd blood" as a sci-fi term, something futuristic, "not natural blood, but something strange." That diverse strangeness hits the Bay Area when Yeasayer play on Saturday, April 17, at the Fillmore. 1805 Geary Blvd., San Francisco. 9pm. $20. 415.346.6000. I Across the bridge Leilani Clark THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 33 Bill Cutting and Gianni Messmer plan to host metal, rock, indie, emo and country bands at their new downtown venue. The crazy rhythm of Chrome Lotus, Santa Rosa's newest nightclub By Gabe Meline alking through Chrome Lotus, downtown Santa Rosa's newest nightclub and live music venue, is kind of like eating KFC's Famous Bowl--it's a lot of different elements rolled into one helping of dimly lit comfort. Opened last week by Round Robin coowners Gianni Messmer and Bill Cutting, the buzzed-about spot with the ramped-up Facebook campaign is a mashup experience fusing the highbrow and lowbrow that's sure to be hot on the cherry-red lips of Sonoma County's nightlife hounds--glitterati, metalheads, the salon set, tramp-stamp party girls, hipsters, business-casual drinkers, nononsense lushes, indie rockers, goateed rock bros and see-and-be-seen dancers alike. With such a variegated scope, it could be just what Santa Rosa's been lacking. But will all these elements get along for the sake of a new, promising live music opportunity? "Whatever we do, there's a certain percentage of people that aren't gonna like it," says Messmer, who, with Cutting, opened Chrome Lotus last week. "You can never, ever be 100 percent. So if we're 51 percent, then we're doing good. And even if we're 49 percent, as long as they're talking about it." When Messmer bought the Round Robin in 2006, he talked about transforming Santa Rosa's famed dive bar into an edgy, sexy, biker chic joint with hot young beer slingers dancing on the bar. It never came fully to fruition, but that Coyote Ugly�like atmosphere permeates the front bar at Chrome Lotus. Cleavage galore: check. Jukebox playing AC/DC: check. Drinks with names like "Smack My Beach Up," the "Dirty Sanchez Margarita" and the "Lotus Spreader": check. "You know, we just wanted something fun," Messmer says of the cocktail's names. "We wanted this place to not be just another bar. Assuming people come in for a bachelorette party, or it's your birthday or a special celebration, you want to do stupid little gimmicks like that." Tucked away from all this down a long hallway in the back is an incredible music room, a brick-walled hamlet that's like walking into a different world than the front area. A separate bar serves a laid-back crowd in front of a modest two-foot-tall stage. A disco ball hangs in the center. The room is just the right size--breathable and roomy, but still intimate--and even with just 100 people there, the place is nicely packed. Patrick Malone, local tastemaker who's done an excellent job booking the Hopmonk Tavern in Sebastopol, is on board to bring in both local and touring bands. (Messmer calls him "a ninja.") But don't expect the reggaejam-band-folk-soul-bluegrass lineup that's done so well at Hopmonk. Chrome Lotus will focus on "rock, metal, punk, indie and emo," says Malone, who's hired an assistant to handle the extra load and help book bands with few other local options. There's also the Thursday-night live music sponsored by Country 106.3-FM, a radio station that plays classic Johnny Cash, Loretta Lynn, George Jones and Merle Haggard. Live country music simply hasn't had a nightclub home base in Santa Rosa for years, and realistically--whether or not one wants to admit it--it's one of the most popular genres in Sonoma County. While this is a boon, Chrome Lotus' ban on hip-hop will disappoint the area's legions of rap fans. To Messmer, it's a business compromise that unfortunately makes sense. In the Santa Rosa Police Department's eye, hip-hop is basically one big semiautomaticgang-war cocaine-sex-fest rap battle, and Messmer isn't willing to take the chance of being targeted for shutdown by the city attorney's office for hosting it. "I think hip-hop equals problems," says Messmer, adding that he's aware of and will support more positive, conscious hip-hop artists. "But I'm not into that tough-guy image, smackin'-my-bitch-up. I'm not doing that. I don't want that, I don't want those people in here, and I don't think they're going to like this place anyway." Fancier features of Chrome Lotus seem grafted from the "ultralounge" aesthetic, held over from Messmer's short-lived founding interest in the former swank downtown hotspot Seven. Two reserved box booths with bottle service hug the walls in the music room. A private room straddling the patio and music area is planned. A coat check greets all entrants before giving way to a bar with plenty of illuminated top-shelf liquor. A trained security team with earpieces checks the guest list at the ropes on the sidewalk and pats down pockets before entry. Finally, there's the basic watering-hole aspect. Pool tables and corner couches fill a triangular room behind the bar. A soonto-open pizza spot next door will serve up plenty of pepperoni and cheese for late-night hunger pangs. Sunday features $2 beer deals, and a "Rough Days Happen" special offers 25 cent PBRs to those who bring in a recent divorce certificate, foreclosure document, pink slip or bankruptcy notice. A covered, ventilated outdoor patio that will allow smoking is set for completion soon. Why Chrome Lotus' crazy fusion of nightlife mashup works is that the layout is expansive enough to accommodate all stripes without forcibly criss-crossing them. Music fans in the back don't need to tune out catcalls from the meat-market crowd. Pool players don't have to navigate their cue sticks around bleach-blonde Jersey Shore girls. Real estate agents catching the Warriors game after work don't have to do so with a metal band five feet away. The main thing that everyone can get behind? Already, a handful of local music nights will boast just a $1 door charge. "Our goal is to bring affordable live music to this side of the railroad tracks," Messmer says. "If you haven't noticed, the economy's crap, and I'd rather people be able to come and listen to a good band. They're gonna spend money at the bar either way. I'd rather have them keep their $10 in their pocket and buy a few drinks and listen to some good music." This weekend, Chrome Lotus features JD Bauman and the Boot Band on Feb. 11 ($1), Simoom, Trial by Combat and Fear the Fiasco on Feb. 12 ($1), Counterbalance on Feb. 13 ($1) and a `Love or Lust' Valentine's party with DJs TonyTone and Truthlive on Feb. 14 ($5). 505 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa. www.chromelotussr.com. 34 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Monica Bryant is among those donating to the SSU Art Gallery's annual Art from the Heart auction. See Events. Galleries THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 35 SCA offers seduction in the camera's light o often the silver screen creates a paradigm of romance that reality can't compete with. Sometimes that defeats us, but what better time than Valentine's Day to embrace the illusion? On Feb. 13, the Sebastopol Center for the Arts presents "The Lost Art of Seduction," an adults-only look into the most provocative scenes in Hollywood history. Resident film critic Gil Mansergh will delve into key scenes from more than 20 sexy films, ranging from such classics as The King and I and Henry and June to the lesser-known A Walk on the Moon. Proving the ever-evolving acting range of Viggo Mortensen, he's seen post-Amish but pre-Tolkien in Sonoma County screenwriter Pamela Gray's film portraying a nomadic, free-spirited man who takes Diane Lane on an illicit adventure outside of her otherwise conservative '60s lifestyle. (The waterfall scenes are not to be missed.) More recent steamy scenes from such films as Brokeback Mountain will also be showcased. While it sounds potentially awkward to be with a group of strangers for an evening of erotic snippets, Mansergh promises an evening of fun, leaving attendees wanting more. "What I want to do is get people to go to Blockbuster or put these in their Netflix queue, after they get a sampler, and watch them at home after. Get the whole experience," Mansergh explains. And who knows? Amidst the wine and chocolate that will flow and benefit the SCA, an opportunity to meet a partnerin-crime for your own steamy movie session might just present itself. "This was started as and really is a chance for people interested in the movie world, in script writing, in film making, to meet others locally who are as well," Mansergh says. After all, serendipity is a cinematic classic. "The Lost Art of Seduction" heats up the Sebastopol Center for the Arts on Saturday, Feb. 13. 6780 Depot St., Sebastopol. 7:30pm. $10. 707.849.4797. Kate McFarland S Events F&D Comedy Field Trips Dance 36 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Film Readings Lectures The 118th annual Citrus Fair takes over Cloverdale this weekend in a salute to the men and women of our armed forces. See Events. Theater For Kids THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 37 BOHEMIANROMANCE check us out online at: www.NorthBayRomance.com To become a member, call To listen & respond to ads using your credit card, call To listen & respond to ads, call 1 800.214.3435 For customer service, email bohemian@ placepersonal.com, or call 1-617-450-8773 Women Seeking Men 1949 CLASSIC SWF, tall, slender, active, enjoys swimming, bicycling, mysteries, hiking, cooking, barbecuing, symphony. Seeking well-mannered, caring S/DWM, 50-60, N/S, N/D, N/Drugs, with similar interests, for friendship and companionship. 415313 LET'S GO OUT & HAVE FUN! Honest woman, 50s, very caring, compassionate, kind, my interests are long drives, walks, dancing, visiting new places, dinners. Seeking nice SM, 50s-60s, for LTR. 297169 PRETTY & SLENDER Bright and youthful SWF, 50+, enjoys listening to or playing music, travel, playing at the beach, and dating. 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Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 18-33, in boots for LTR. 315052 Men Seeking Women PACIFIC NORTHWEST Casual guy, enjoys mountain and beach trips, walks, outdoors, moonlit nights, cuddling. Seeking SWF, 40-56, slim/medium build, to come spend quiet times in Pacific Northwest. 954499 SHARED JOY SWM, 59, 5'9", 160lbs, nicelooking, with good SOH, seeking woman to have fun with, race/age unimportant. I like dancing, partying, shows and dining out. Call me! 972627 SONOMA COUNTY MAN Late 50s, looking for a male, 25-65, for fun, romance and dating. Enjoy theater, reading, long walks, quality time at home. 327425 Next door to The Mighty Quinn on SR Ave Open 7 Days a Week 10am to 10pm ABBREVIATIONS: A-Asian; B-Black; C-Christian; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; J-Jewish; M-Male; N/S-Non-Smoker; P-Professional; S-Single; W-White Guidelines:BohemianRomanceisacommunitypublication.ParticipantsintheBohemianRomancemust be 18 years or older. Use of Bohemian Romance for any illegal purpose will be subject to prosecution. Bohemian Romanceisnotliableforthecontentofthepersonalsadvertisementsortheresponsetosuchadvertisements.BohemianRomance encourages readers to take appropriate safeguards when responding to personal and arrangingmeetings.Screenallrespondentscarefully.Meetingswithnew companions should occur in public places and participants should not divulge their addresses. Be smart, not sorry. Notallboxescontainavoicegreeting. Dial 1.900.287.1222 or 1.800.273.8235 (with credit card or check) 0204 Only $2.29 per minute � 18 and up � Or call toll-free 1.800.214.3435 to become a member. THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 38 BOHEMIANROMANCE To become a member, call To listen & respond to ads, call 1.800.214.3435 To listen & respond to ads using a credit card or check, call 1 900.287.1222 Call costs $2.19/min. Must be 18+ Men Seeking Women HOPE TO FIND YOU Sociable, good-hearted, compassionate, healthy gentleman, 63, published writer/ poet, D/D-free, non-drinker, enjoys quiet times, home, sports, simple times. Seeking loving, happy, intelligent woman to share life, love, possible LTR. Bay Area preferred. 224839 LOOK NO FURTHER SWM, 30, 5'4'', looking for a woman, 30-40, who wants to hang out and get to know each other. 317907 COOKING FOR YOU! SWM, 62, 5'10", 170lbs, N/S, light drinker, clean shaven, hazel eyes, self-employed, loves cooking, jazz and traveling. Seeking a similar woman, 50-80, race unimportant, for possible LTR. 318883 ONE GOOD MAN LEFT SHM, 32, N/S, likes soccer, running. In search of SA/BF for friendship first possibly leading to more. 319059 JUST MOVED HERE SWM, 5'7'', 190lbs, brown eyes, wants to meet soulmate in similar SF, 30-55. I love swing dancing, travel, gourmet cooking, animals, nature. 305800 SOMEONE LIKE ME SWM, youthful 51, 5'11'', 200lbs, dark hair, hazel eyes, looking for a lady, 40-59, who likes to party, is outgoing, adventurous. 319319 EASY ON THE EYES Outgoing, good-looking WM, 6', 175lbs, salt-n-pepper/blue, good sense of humor, spontaneous, romantic, adventurous, likes weekend getaways, concerts and more. Seeking honest, appreciative woman, 22-65, who has goals in life. 320839 JACK OF HEARTS Handsome dude, 57, good SOH, interesting, spontaneous, fun, adventuresome, looking for attractive woman. I enjoy dancing, concerts, dining out, hiking, beach combing and holding hands also loves animals, dogs, cats and 20 horses. Happy trails! 1639 SOMETIMES MISCHIEVOUS Optimistic, honest, cleancut, caring, outdoorsy man, 50s, likes music, walks, long drives, running, watching tv, museums, dining out. Seeking SF, 50s, for companionship. 313135 KISSING & CUDDLING Single man in Sonoma County, extremely romantic, looking for an equally romantic partner. I love soft kisses, snuggling on the couch, and making you laugh! 315225 LOTTERY WINNER if you respond to this ad you will in effect have won the lottery. I'm a bald 54 year-old, handsome man, well-traveled, love cooking, adventure, exploring. Ready to have a slender, attractive, sexy, happy girlfriend. 325270 FRIENDSHIP FIRST Caring, honest, nurturing SM, 60s, enjoys music, watching tv, walks, camping, coffee shops, hiking and museums. Looking for SF, 30-70, for dating possibly leading to LTR. 313144 LTR AND LOVE IN BOOTS Italian Taurus, SM, 45, 6', 218lbs, N/S, N/Drugs, N/D, long hair, educated, published, financially/emotionally secure, respectful, inspiring, tender, great sense of humor, enjoys alternative music, dancing, movies, animals, cooking, conversation, mountains. Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 18-33, in boots for LTR. 315055 LET'S MEET FOR COFFEE SM, 20s, bright, artistic, ambitious, optimistic, personable, likes dining, travel, the beach, walking, exercise. Seeking female, 20s, for possible relationship. 318319 COMPASSIONATE SM, 60s, with good values, likes camping, dancing, dining, reading, hiking, walking, biking. Looking for SF, 50s, for LTR. 318320 1 800.273.8235 Women Seeking Women LET'S GO OUT WF, 5'2", 125lbs, would like to meet a BF, 48-59, for fun, romance and possible relationship. Give me a call. 326658 WHERE ARE YOU? You are 35-45, very feminine, dark, mystical, spiritual, with a sense of humor, know what you like, and want to enjoy life, but not alone. I'm trying to find you, where are you? 310085 LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 41, Santa Rosa area, looking for a SWF, 30-45, to hang out and have fun with. 318644 WHATEVER YOU DECIDE! SM, 5'11'', 170lbs, light brown hair, blue eyes, athletic build, shaved, smooth and sexy, well-endowed, into a wide variety of pleasures. Anything goes; role play, fantasy fulfillment, toys, porn, lingerie. Seeking couples and females to party and play. 316161 COUPLE SEEKS WOMAN Very attractive, middle-aged, married white couple, she's 5'2", 125lbs, 34D. He is 5'11", 172lbs. Both and very sensual and she is multi-orgasmic. We are N/S, light drinkers, healconscious, pleasant, nonpushy. Please be N/S, H/W proportionate, white, Hispanic or Asian, under 55. Bi or bi-curious ok. Discretion assured. Let's have fun. 314002 TURN THE TABLES Handsome, sane, married WM, 57 is looking for a woman, who knows how to use a strap on, for ongoing, mostly daytime play. I will please you in any way that you want and I take directions well. 318288 GREAT LEGS! Tall, slender cross-dresser, very nice legs, looking for men or a group of men. Give me a call, let's have some fun! 318996 BD/SM SWM, submissive, wants one or two females or young male for BD/SM, watersports, torture, anal. Never did any of this before, but curious to try now! 319455 SEEKING COUPLES Good-looking bi male, 50, would like to meet bi man/ woman couples for erotic interlude. 319986 TRIPLE PLAY Handsome, easygoing, discreet, polite gentleman, 57, enjoys couples. I am a WM, 6', 190lbs, athletic build, well hung and Bi. I also like dominant women. 232423 LET'S HAVE SOME FUN Male looking for an older gentleman, 35-65, to teach me the ropes. I haven't been with too many people. I like watching adult movies and trying new things. 321782 I NEED HELP! Married HM, 49, 5'11", goodlooking, doesn't get it at home. Looking for a wild woman with a high libido for a discreet sexual encounter. 322196 FREAKY MAN... looking for a freaky, spontaneous, wild, erotic woman, 18-55, to get together and have some fun, adult times together. 322361 JOIN US Bi couple looking for a stud, a muffin or both. Satisfaction guaranteed. 323336 SANTA ROSA AREA WM, 41, looking for openminded people who enjoy adult fun. I like adult movies, toys and looking for a couples and females. I can be orally bi depending on the chemistry. 323130 LET'S HAVE FUN SM, 38, 6'2", 200lbs, looking for a top or couples to get together and share good times with. 324363 DISCREET ENCOUNTER BiHM, 50, 5'6", 180lbs, nonsmoker, seeking males, females or couples to have some hot fun and more. 324668 BROWN SUGAR SBF, 44, big behind and beautiful breasts, loves to get freaky. Spontaneous and open-minded, searching for well-endowed, spontaneous, open-minded, well-dressed man who appreciates a good lady. 325727 INTIMATE ENCOUNTERS SWM, 47, 6', blond/blue, very strong, Scorpio, seeks discreet intimate encounters with single, married or divorced ladies in the North Bay. I'm a great masseusse as well. 326306 Alternative Lifestyles STRAIGHT COUPLE... seeks straight male for threeway. We're looking for a man who is straight, or at least good at pretending to be, to help us get extra super snuggly deep down in the covers. 327082 ANYTHING GOES I love to please and be pleased. Looking for a couple for fun times together. 325726 JOIN US White couple looking for a female, 18-25, for fun, discreet times together. Give us a call. 311573 READY FOR FUN? SWM, 30, feminine bottom, looking for a top WM, 20-60, for good times and fun. Let's see where it goes! 311892 SPANK YOU VERY MUCH Woman, thou shalt be spanked. Gentle or hard, clothed or naked, whatever you deserve, by a sexy man who knows how to do it. 288495 SHE-MALE SEEKS GOOD TIMES Want to spend time with a man or a woman. I am very affectionate, beautiful, and love to be held. Interested? 279657 KEEP IT DISCREET WF, 30s, dark/dark, light complexion, fun-loving, bi-curious, seeks discreet female, 28-55, to have fun and party with. 314779 18+ 866.689.5312 Get ready to meet someone special. Missed Connections AMAZON KINDLE Hello, I met you Friday June 27 at the Russian River Brewing Company on Fourth St. in Santa Rosa. She may be a computer programmer from St. Helena Hospital and watched on this day 3 movies back to back in the theater on Fourth St. in the town of Santa Rosa The Love Guru by Mike Meyers, Wall-E and another film. And she sipped a little beer and read from her Amazon kindle. I would like to get in touch with this girl and ask her to edit my book. She is a perfect candidate for my book. Hope to hear from you. Phil. 274972 CORINA IN OLIVER'S Saturday at 4:00PM, You had 15-year-old twins with blacks belts in karate. I have two cute little kids. We talked about children and kale. Lunch? 311695 Men Seeking Men LOOKING FOR LOVE Seeking one man to love and care for completely and forever. Me: SBM, 50ish, affectionate, supportive, genuine, lots to offer. You: just be yourself, imperfect, mature older man, 70-90, with some humor, some laughter. Are you the one? 299175 COMPASSIONATE GUY Hard-working, classy, cleancut, caring, honest male in search of a male, 58-69, who likes night clubs, television, travel, dancing, the beach, taking walks, exercise. 308996 call 1.800.214.3435 (with credit card or check) 0204 The Bohemian is no longer servicing walk-in ads. Please call 1-800-214-3435 to become a member. Dial 1.900.287.1222 or 1.800.273.8235 39 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN Only $2.19 per minute � 18 and up � Or call toll-free 1.800.214.3435 to become a member. Placing an Ad BOHEMIANCLASSIFIEDS Contacting Us Bohemian Classifieds 847 5th Street, Santa Rosa, CA 95404 Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m. ph: 707.527.1200 � By Phone Call the Department at 707.527.1200 Mon.-Fri., 8:30a.m.5:30p.m. By Fax Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 707.527.1288 Bartenders in Demand g Employment Jobs $$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-405-7619 EXT 2450 [ www.easywork-greatpay.com (AAN CAN) No experience necessary. Make up to $300 per shift. Part-time, day, evening, night shifts available. Training, placement, certification provided. Call 877-879-9153 (AAN CAN) g For Sale Computer Services g Miscellaneous Your Personality Determines Your Happiness Know why? Call for your free personality test. Call 1-800-293-6463 Professional Services Golden Star Grafix g Miscellaneous GAIN NATIONAL EXPOSURE g For Sale Electronics Get Dish with FREE Installation $19.99/mo HBO & Showtime FREE - Over 50 HD Channels FREE Lowest Prices � No Equipment to Buy! Call Now for full Details 1-877-242-0974 (AAN CAN) Activists Get Dish-Free Installation $19.99 per month. HBO & Showtime Free. Over 50 HD Channels Free. Lowest Prices no equipment to buy! Call now for details: 1-877-238-8413. (AAN CAN) Miscellaneous g Home Services Remodeling/Repair Reach over 5 million young, educated readers for only Need a quality designer? $995 by advertising in 110 Business cards, brochures, weekly newspapers like this flyers, posters, digital collage, one. Call Jason at 202-289cd covers, photographic 8484. This is not a job offer. restoration, general (AAN CAN) marketing materials. Mark Schaumann 707-795-0924, email@example.com MacAdvantage Macintosh FREE Diagnosis, Friendly In-House Staff Hardware/ Software, DATA Recovery, Internet, Email,Wireless Network Setup & Security, Apple Authorized Business Agent, Tam NguyenChief Tech, M-F 10-6 email@example.com 707.664.0400 Classes & Instruction ggg Wanted through out Bay Area !! Help qualify California Initiatives. $12-$25 Hourly. Flexible hours. Please call 707-332-9118 Career Development g Homes Real Estate Services Q UALITY G RAPHIC D ESIGN BUSINESS CARDS � BROCHURES POSTERS � T-SHIRTS � CD COVERS FLYERS � PHOTOGRAPHIC RESTORATION Family Services Adoptions ALL AREAS - HOUSES FOR RENT Browse thousands of rental listings with photos and maps. Advertise your rental home for FREE! Visit: www.RealRentals.com (AAN CAN) (AAN CAN) Free Advice! We'll Help You Choose A Program Or Degree To Get Your Career & Your Life On Track. Call Collegebound Network Today! 1-877-892-2642 (AAN CAN) Pregnant? Hand Blown Glass Art Considering Adoption? Makes a Great Gift Talk with caring agency specializing in matching for Valentines Day Made by Local artists, One of a kind glass art pieces at incredible prices. Only at Tama Rama's in Downtown Cotati. 8252 Old Redwood Hwy, Cotati (707) 795-1425 birthmothers with families nationwide. Living expenses paid. Call 24/7 Abby's One True Gift Adoptions. 866/413-6293 (AAN CAN) g High School Diploma! general marketing materials Fast, affordable and accred ited. Free brochure. Call Now!. 1-888-532-6546 ext. 97 www.continentalacademy.com (AAN CAN) email@example.com Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924 g g Adult Entertainment Adult Entertainment THE PLACE TO MEET HOT Quality and Maturity Kara, in Marin. Call for photos. Please, no calls from blocked phone numbers. No calls after midnight. 415/233-2769. Adult Massage **North Bay Beauties** Convenient incall off 101. Ask about website pix. Liza * 707-566-7866 Kayla * 707-843-2271 Enlargement FDA Medical Vacuum Pumps. Gain 1-3 inches permanently. Testosterone, Viagra, Cialis. Free brochures. 619/294-7777 www.drjoelkaplan.com (discounts available) * FREE TO T RY ! CALL NOW! 707-206-6494 AT HOME? Collect Call Billing! 1-866-607-5282 1-900 PRICING OPTIONS! 1-900-622-1100 ON THE GO? DIAL #CLICK (#25425) 79�/min. Sprint. Boost, AT&T SANTA ROSA 18 + *CARRIER CHARGES MAY APPLY THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 40 HEALTH&WELL-BEING gg Healing & Bodywork Massage & Relaxation Man of Your Dreams Men, women, couples. TLC, massage, Tantra, nurturing mutual touch. William 707-548-2187 PAIN/STRESS RELIEF Professional male massage; strong, deep healing work; for men/ women; 1 hr/$50, 1 1/2 hr $65. 707-536-1516 www.CompleteBodyBalance.com FLOWER SPA Ayurvedic Great Massage By Joe, CMT. Relaxing hot tub A Safe Place and pool available. Will do To Be Real outcalls. 707-228-6883. Holistic tantric masseuse. Unhurried, private, heartfelt. Strong Thorough Monday thru Saturday. and Intuitive NEW CLIENT DISCOUNT. 30 yrs experience. Excellent 707-793-2232. Rates! 1/2 hour, hour or 90 Deep Relaxing Full mins. Colin, CMT 707-823-2990. Body Massage Massage � Reflexology Swedish/Shiatsu Open 7 Days: 10am-10pm 1626 4th St. Santa Rosa 707.526.6888 Indian Head Massage � relief from tension headaches, eyestrain, and sinusitis � improves mobility in neck and shoulders Golden Flower Massage Spa Bearhands4u Massage for men, Sebastopol. Mature, strong, professional. 707/291-3804. Days, evenings, weekends $60/hr. Outcalls available. To total Completion by a mature male $40/hour. Napa Valley location. Roger 707-525-1771. Rocks Clouds and Zendo Zazenkai One Day Meditation Retreat with the founding teacher of Lotus Fire Sangah. Sunday Feb 28th - 6:00 am to 4:00 pm. Email us with questions firstname.lastname@example.com or call 707-319-2001 Full Body Sensual Massage With a mature, playful CMT. Comfortable incall location near the J.C. in Santa Rosa. Soothing, relaxing, and fun. Visa/MC accepted. Gretchen 707/478-3952. � Swedish & Deep Tissue Massage � Hot Stone Massage � balances energy Centering Prayer Retreat Day This retreat day will offer a variety of contemplative prayer practices (centering prayer, prayer walk, lectio divina, journaling). Beginners welcome. Cost: $25. Sat, Feb 13, 10am, 5 pm, Journey Center, Santa Rosa, 707-578-2121,www.journeycenter.org. RELAX! Relaxing massage and bodywork by male massage therapist with 11 yrs experience. 707-542-6856 699 Petaluma Blvd. N 707.765.1879 Open 7 days 9am-10pm MEN! Get a Massage Lily Spa RELAX Asian Massage Thai � Deep Tissue Swedish � Hot Stone 1 HR/$65 90 MIN/$100 walk-ins or appt the way you like it. Swedish and deep tissue techniques. Relaxing and rejuvenating. Flexible schedule for your convenience. Outcalls available. Call James 707-477-4365. Opening Specials � FREE Table Shower � Excellent Massage � Relaxing Body Treatments � Large Steam Sauna � Easy & Safe Parking Petaluma Lavender Day Spa Margery Smith 707.578.9642 Escape to Pleasure Island! Need a mini-vacation? Let go of your stress as you relax and enjoy the best of sensual massage by a lovely lady with a caring touch. Quality, Class & discretion. Accept Visa/MC Joy C.M.T. 707-477-1766. Santa Rosa. Walk ins Welcome Open 7 Days 9-10pm 131 Liberty St, Ste. D at Washington behind Wachovia Bank SPIRITUAL CONNECTIONS Finding inspiration and connecting with your community The Journey Center: Christ-centered Spirituality, Healing, & Wholeness Reading room, art gallery, prayer/ meditation gatherings, spiritual journey resources, bodywork, bookstore, free WiFi. 1601 Fourth Street, Santa Rosa. www.journeycenter.org 707.578.2121 Ken McLEod to speak 7pm, Feb 23 Santa Rosa Shambhala Center, 709 Davis Street (enter via 8th Street Parking Lot Northwest door) for information call 529-1561 or visit www.santarosa.shambhala.org Mahakaruna Buddhist Meditation Center Offers ongoing introductory and advanced classes. Weds at noon, Tues & Weds evenings 7:30�8:45pm Prayers for World Peace, Sun, 10:30�11:45am Everyone welcome. 304 Petaluma Blvd., North, Petaluma www.meditationinnorcal.org 707.782.9898 707.528.2540 3401 Cleveland Ave #2 Santa Rosa NOW OPEN Therapeutic Massage Center Body Massage o $55/hr Open 7 days 9-10pm Guerneville M4M Massage Mitch, CMT. Mature. Professional. Relaxing intuitive touch. Private discrete studio. 707-849-7409 Foot Massage $19.99/45 min 2460 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa g Miscellaneous Take Care of Yourself With a deeply relaxing, pampering, sensual, massage. Winter Special. CMT in Santa Rosa. Call Bliss 415/717-9378. 707.578.3088 Prof Surrogate/Masseuse Holistic, caring, help with all sexual concerns. Tantric and relationship coaching. Supervising Dr available. 707-793-2232 A Provider of Pleasure In a safe, relaxing, comfortable space by a "mature", compatible, easy-going gentleman! Since 1991 I`ve provided pleasure to women, men, couples. Good virtues. NW Santa Rosa, Jimmy, (C) 707-799-4467 or (L) 707-527-9497. Call the Bohemian NOW to advertise! 707.527.1200 firstname.lastname@example.com Share your organization's inspiration with over 95,100 Bohemian Readers monthly! Phone: 707.527.1200 email: firstname.lastname@example.com 41 02.10.10-02.16.10 THE BOHEMIAN For the week of Feb. 10 This bone good for one free day of doggy care! certain conditions apply, offer good thru Feb. 28, 2010 DOGGY ofDAYcountryARE C grounds 10 acres safe Huge dry barn for rainy days Low Cost Vaccination Clinics every Sunday, 9:30-11am 707-322-3272 www.incrediblecanine.com email@example.com WESTERN FARM CENTER 707.545.0721 21 West 7th St. Santa Rosa In addition to this column, Rob Brezsny offers expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text message horoscopes. To buy access, go to www.realastrology.com. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1.877.873.4888 or 1.900.950.7700. THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 42 BOHEMIAN FLIPSIDE Wednesday ~ March 24, 2010 TOUGH TIMES THINKING STAYING POSITIVE IN A NEGATIVE WORLD With local Author & Speaker Steven Campbell 5:30 pm to 8:30 pm Mary Agatha Furth Center, Windsor CA 5:30 pm to 6:00 pm ~ Registration & Light Appetizers 6:00 pm to 8:30 pm ~ Workshop 8:30 pm ~ Q&A and Author book signing All proceeds go to the The Drug Abuse Alternatives Center Perinatal Day Treatment Program Helping Mothers Saving Babies Suggested donation ~ $25 per person Save the Date Bikram Yoga San Rafael We don't change because we see the light...we change because we feel the heat. So what are you waiting for? 2010 is your time to change your body, change your life! The Bikram beginning practice is suitable for beginners and advanced yogis appealing to both men and women of all fitness levels. Bikram Yoga of Santa Rosa Bikram's Yoga system will reshape and heal your body while it relieves stress and tension. The Bikram Method of Hatha Yoga is a demanding series of 26 postures, done in a heated room and meant to be performed in the given order, to the best of one's ability. A principle of the class is that one can learn to steadily make new demands of oneself, to work harder, deeper, yet calmer. It's Hot! (Regular price $75 per person for this Workshop) Sonoma County resident Steven Campbell has spent the past 20+ years studying how the brain works. This past spring, he released his third book, Making Your Mind Magnificent: Flourishing at Any Age. He now leads a series of workshops and presentations throughout California based on the concepts in his book. Steven's work can be boiled down to this simple, yet oh-so-hard-to-change idea: The Brain accepts what we tell it without question! Once we learn how to change the way we think (the emphasis of Steven's workshop), we will literally change our lives in that very instant! Steven is a volunteer at DAAC, hosting on-going educational programs at the Perinatal and Turning Point Residential Programs TICKETS SOLD AT & SPONSORED BY: Bikram Yoga Petaluma Want to lose unwanted weight quickly and safely? Bikram yoga's your ticket. Want to get healthy? With Bikram yoga, every muscle group and all five systems of the body are stimulated towards peak performance. The end result is you ROCK--mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Maverick Media For more information - http://www.daacinfo.org (Events) or http://anintelligentheart.blogspot.com THE BOHEMIAN 02.10.10-02.16.10 43 SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM Medical Marijuana Evaluations Local. Independent. Comprehensive. Absolute lowest fee. 10% off for Seniors and Vets. Be legal. Be safe. Call for your confidential appt. 707-528-1829. 1901 CLEVELAND AVE SUITE B, Santa Rosa Meth and Alcohol Treatment that allows you to keep your day job! Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help.(707) 576-0818. Your Personality Determines Your Happiness Know why? Call for your free personality test. Call 1-800-293-6463 Medical Marijuana Certifications $125. Santa Rosa. 707-575-7375. Donate Your Auto 800.380.5257 We do all DMV. Free pick up- running or not (restrictions apply). Live operators- 7 days! Help the Polly Klaas Foundation provide safety information and assist families in bringing kids home safely. GET YOUR CAT FIXED FOR FREE! Free spay & neuter surgeries for cats will be provided Sat., Feb. 20 to low-income Sonoma County residents, courtesy of Sonoma County Animal Network and participating veterinarians. Pre-registration is a must. CALL: 707-586-6651. Free Autism Series starts 2/17/10! 7:00 pm. Carlisle Holland DO. Call for info & reservations (707) 824-8764. www.holonomicinstitute.com. Santa Rosa Treatment Program Golden Star Grafix Need a quality designer? Business cards, brochures, flyers, posters, digital collage, cd covers, photographic restoration, general marketing materials. Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924 Benefit for Haitian Health Foundation Afro/Haitian Dancing & Drumming. Feb 13th, Sat @ 11am-1pm. 264 First Street East, Vintage House Sonoma. $10.00 Donation Requested. Info: Karin Devaney, 707-360-8795 or firstname.lastname@example.com get high Green Earth Catering Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager. 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell firstname.lastname@example.com Napa Mustard Festival A Season of Sensational Events!Celebrate Napa Valley`s food, wine, art, agricultural and cultural bounties during the Mustard Season. Jan. 30 to Mar. 27. 707-938-1133. mustardfestival.org on not on drugs � Heroin/Opiate (Vicodin, Oxycontin) detox and maintenance utilizing Methadone � Methamphetamine and other stimulant treatment � Subutex/Suboxone available � Providing Treatment since 1984 � Confidentiality assured life Hand Blown Glass Art Makes a Great Gift for Valentines Day Made by Local artists, One of a kind glass art pieces at incredible prices. Only at Tama Rama's in Downtown Cotati. 8252 Old Redwood Hwy, Cotati (707) 795-1425 SUBUTEX/SUBOXONE available for Safe Oxycontin, Vicodin, Other Opiate Withdrawal! Confidential Program. (707) 576 1919 Green Earth Catering Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell email@example.com SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM 1901 Cleveland Ave Suite B, Santa Rosa 707-576-0818 www.srtp.net Relapse Doesn't Mean Failure Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help. (707) 576 0818 It's Hot! ing Open Ver y ! Soon SKIRT CHASER VINTAGE NEW LOCATION! 208 Davis Street., Railroad Square 707546-4021. ALWAYS BUYING! Love farm animals? Become a VIP and a fan of Compassionate-Carnivores.org on Facebook, advocating for family farms. Photography by Paul Burke 707.664.0178 email@example.com 707 775-2400 MY 2010 INTENTION...TURN MY LIFE AROUND DAAC can help with your alcohol or other drug addiction Turning Point Residential Program � 30 to 270 days of treatment � Opiate Treatment Track � NEW Payment Plan HOPE HEALING HEALTH CALL TODAY 707.544.3295 or visit www.daacinfo.org A F F O R DA B L E � CO N F I D E N T I A L � 4 0 Y E A R S O F CO M M U N I T Y N O N - P R O F I T S E RV I C E

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