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Why is it so hard for one to open up about an abusive past?
How to you summon the courage to share? What are the reasons that one may keep such terrible things locked inside? How does one overcome this fear of sharing?
May 17 2013: Shame and guilt. Feeling like you are not worth anything to whomever is abusing you which leads you to feel almost as if you deserved it. I can't speak for everyone who has been abused, but I know these are my reasons. Now I feel better though, and I do share my story, and I feel that it is nothing I should be ashamed of. If I can confidently speak about my history, others will feel like they can too, or maybe they will open up to me.
Brian BASHAM
May 29 2013: Mmmm, Kate how does one answer your questions without divulging too much. I think for me, it is the fact that some people are still alive, and although I am a grown-up I still fear repercussions and perhaps fearful of what they might do next.
- +4
Also, I think - or at least some of us - wonder what we may have done to cause it to happen to us. While we are a victim, we cannot help but blame ourselves. Other times we struggle to keep it together and not be the same as they were.
May 29 2013: Dear Brian and Juan,
We can divulge as much or as little as we feel comfortable with Brian. It is not unusual, that as adults we sometimes continue to carry the feelings that were instilled in us.
Brian, I suspect that you were not in any way the cause of abuse, and it is quite common for an abuser to try to make the victim feel responsible. That is a common part of the cycle of abuse, and one of the main elements in keeping people quiet about it. The abuser encourages and reinforces shame in the victim, which causes victims to be hesitant or fearful about revealing the information. Remind yourself that you WERE NOT TO BLAME. Remember that it is a common practice for abusers, in an attempt to keep the victim quiet.
I do not agree with your statement..."Sometimes the best the world can do for you is declare you insane and leave it at that!"
Unfortunately, when we live with abuse and violence, there are sometimes feelings of insanity, so for the world to "declare you insane", simply reinforces the stigma. I'm wondering if you were making a joke?
I don't understand how that video makes you happy, nor do I perceive a connection with the topic.
Comment deleted
May 31 2013: Sorry you perceive that I "lumped" you together Juan. While my salutation is to both of you, I addressed each of you seperately. I had no intention to "zing one" at you with "a bank shot!"
I simply do not agree with your statement...."Sometimes the best the world can do for you is declare you insane and leave it at that!".....and I told you why I disagree...there is no judgement on my part.
I also clearly said..."I don't understand how that video makes you happy, nor do I perceive a connection with the topic.".....my own perception....no judgement.
I have owned a couple of guitars, and I've seen the video (as you say....it went viral!).
OK.....I get your connection...."he faced...abuse...and used his skill to push back and overcome"....got it....thanks for clarifying your connection:>)
Comment deleted
May 31 2013: Juan,
Again, I do not agree with that statement because...as I wrote..."Unfortunately, when we live with abuse and violence, there are sometimes feelings of insanity, so for the world to "declare you insane", simply reinforces the stigma".
I am very sorry about bad things happening to you and your family, and I agree that sometimes we live with consequences. Again....sorry about challenges and consequences you and your family seem to be experiencing.May 16 2013: Kate, I just stumbled across this talk by Jackson Katz, who had some interesting things to say, and it reminded me of this conversation:
May 23 2013: Thanks for turning me on to this talk.
In the context of the original post above, Jackson doesn't directly address the issue of why it may be hard to share abusive experiences; but, it does frame the issue well with concepts that should be considered before we ever confront Kate Roseler's question. Although I have not yet read all of the comments on this thread (just those posted before this one) I did notice that some of the comments assumed abuse against women rather than abusive situations in general. I found that curious, and typical, and ironic.
[edit] It's kinda disappointing that this powerful talk from 2012 is not directly accessible through a search here on the primary TED site.
May 24 2013: Johnathon,
Abuse of women may be one of the more common abuses, and that may be why people address it? You mention bullying in your other comment, which is a form of abuse. When I speak about abuse, I am speaking about all forms of abuse and violation of the rights of people for various reasons.May 24 2013: Lizanne, that is a GREAT talk....thanks for the link!
I volunteered at a shelter and family center years ago, and began to realize that we can support and educate victims about abuse, and what about the abusers? Katz addresses this question very effectively in his very insightful talk!
My experience with victims, motivated me to volunteer with the dept. of corrections, interacting mostly with offenders of domestic violence, co-facilitating "cognitive self change" sessions in addition to other programs for 6 years. A very large percentage of the men incarcerated have been sexually assaulted and abused as children....usually by members of their own families.
So, as Katz says, this is NOT simply a woman's issue, it is an issue for our whole society. I totally agree that men need to be part of the solution, and it takes good leaders, both men and women to speak up about the abuse and violation of human rights of ALL people.
Thanks again for the link to that very good talk!
May 25 2013: Jonathan and Colleen, I'm so glad you both found this talk inspiring. I actually came across it via a friend of mine, who posted it on Facebook! I didn't realize it wasn't searchable here on TED! That is odd...
What really grabbed me, was when Katz was talking about the abused women, and everything SHE could've done, should've done, etc. All focus is on the abused person, when the attention needs to be turned towards the abuser! So logical, especially considering what you have seen through experience, Colleen.
I think I mentioned it somewhere here, but I will take the risk of repeating myself because I find it so extremely important. I read the book "Reinventing Your Life", a self-help reference based on schema therapy. I learned so much about the patterns we create as a survival mechanism, but that those patterns that we develop to help us survive, can sometimes be destructive. Someone who was abused as a child, like the examples you gave Colleen, can develop a pattern that will cause him/her to abuse later in life, unless he/she is aware of that pattern... Its truly fascinating, and sheds so much light on this subject!
May 28 2013: I liked it a LOT Lizanne, because Katz talks about a very logical, reasonable, aspect of abuse and violence. We often focus on the victim with self help advice, educational programs, support groups, etc., and we fail to recognize what might help to change the lives of abusers!
Both the victims of abuse AND the abusers are low in self confidence and self esteem, which may be one reason an abuser will often try to convince us that s/he is the one who is abused.
I agree Lizanne, that many patterns created in a person's life are defensive mechanisms which are often destructive. If a person is not aware of the patterns, s/he will continue to repeat the patterns over and over again. It takes a willingness to explore and evaluate all aspects of the violence and abuse cycle.May 29 2013: Yes! And that awareness needs to be exercised every dingle day. What helped me with awareness, was a Mindfulness training. Becoming even more mindful of myself, taking that deep dive 'into the lake of me' helped me see how my own defensive mechanisms were in fact destructive, that I was in fact my own abuser, to a certain extent.
I don't think anyone really wants to confront themselves when they may know they need to, but the rewards of doing so are truly phenomenal.
May 29 2013: I agree Lizanne......being mindful of our thoughts, feelings and where they come from helps a lot.
We sometimes tend to run the same dialogue over and over again with our thoughts. We need to mindfully change our thoughts. Perhaps that is what you mean when you say..."I was in fact my own abuser, to a certain extent"? We sometimes take on the "script" the abuser gives us, and reinforce in ourselves the information the abuser is providing.
If we feel shame because the abuser has reinforced the idea the we are the cause of the abuse for example, which is common, we can immediately change the thoughts to I AM NOT THE CAUSE....I AM NOT TO BLAME.
I totally agree that to "dive into the lake of me", is difficult at times, and I have always found the rewards of doing so to be beneficial.
One of my favorite quotes, which has been posted all around the house at times...
"To stave off drowning, dive down, embrace it. The sea will spit you back, astonished!"
(David Brendan Hopes)
Don Anderson
May 2 2013: Sometimes it is not the fear of opening-up and sharing, but instead the fear of being viewed differently.
- +4
Personally I have a disability and once someone finds out about it, often I'm no longer me, I'm the guy with the disability. "Hi Don, how's it going" becomes "Hi Don, How are you feeling", so please if someone shares their past or health issue, don't change how you think about them or interact with them.
May 3 2013: Don, I can imagine how frustrating this is for you. I can relate.
People have this need to put everyone in a certain category, don't they. Suddenly, your disability becomes your identity.
My own mistake was that I had become quite good in playing the role of the 'crippled victim', which is what I thought people expected of me (that's my own 'life trap', I over-adjust!) But I agree, prioritizing someone's limitation is not taking them seriously as an individual.
May 5 2013: " your disability becomes your identity . "
true words ! i think this is the main reason why most people don't talk about terrible things locked inside ; nobody likes to be identified as " disable " especially emotionally disable .May 16 2013: Excellent point Don!
One of the first comments on TED for me, was after watching the Jill Bolte Taylor talk about her stroke, and I mentioned that I had a near fatal head/brain injury years ago. The reason a friend sent me the link to that video is because I had some similar experiences as Jill's.
Immediately, a couple people started using that against me in their arguments because they said I was obviously brain damaged, crazy etc. etc. TED is the only place I ever ran into that though.
Luckily, I had been guest lecturing at the university and speaking with various other groups for years, I am pretty clear and confident about myself at this point (the injury was 23 years ago), so the words of someone who is angry and lacks compassion don't bother me. If a person was less secure, however, I imagine it could be challenging.May 17 2013: well saidMay 23 2013: Haley Goranson touched on what I think is the core of why it is hard for people to open up about abuse, though I would add that the individual shame is matched by social judgement, as Don Anderson pointed out. All of us humans tend to be full of prejudices and rationalized judgements.
Opening up to others requires vulnerability that can be taken advantage of. We come to realize this early on through the petty cruelties we inflict on each other in childhood, when teasing and bullying are common coping mechanisms. Unfortunately, as adults, many of us adopt a stance of exploiting the perceived weaknesses of those around us, whether friend, foe or indifferent. Such people can make the vulnerability required to share pain into a source of additional abuse. Avoiding such abuse is natural.
Summoning the courage to share a hurtful experience can be a process of small steps, beginning with acknowledging the abuse personally, to one's self. The next, and possibly last, step might be to reveal the abuse and the emotions it stirs up to the most trusted, loving and compassionate person the abused knows. Although it may feel safer to make such a revelation to an unknown who has no personal investment, such an exchange tends to rob the abused of the potential for further acceptance, grace and empowerment by someone who is personally invested in the abused's well being. That's not to say it can't be helpful; but, rather that it might be less effective. [All of this blather is my personal opinion based on my own baggage, not any professional or intellectual grounds, of course.]
It seems to me that if one can take a moment to say that the can heal then one can repeat that moment until it becomes a part of them. Just as we can become inured to pain and abuse, we can condition ourselves to feel worthy of more and better in our lives. Once we afford ourselves such compassion we can then extend it freely to others that they might benefit from it.
May 24 2013: I agree Johnathon, that opening up to others, requires vulnerability, so trust is a factor when discussing abuse. Most of the time, trust is compromised with abuse, so I believe that sometimes, before people are ready to speak about it, there has to be a certain amount of healing and restored trust in people. As you say, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, can sometimes open ourselves to more abuse. That is why I think that trust has to be rebuilt to some extent before some folks are ready to talk about it.
I also agree that taking small steps is important....test ourselves.....test those we might talk with....see how it feels. It is possible to begin revealing snippets of information, and if it does not feel good, we can stop the process, or change directions. (Your "blather", as you call it, is very insightful my friend).
I agree that when we start with small steps with people that we trust, we can build on that until it becomes a "new" part of us.
You've made a lot of good points, and one of the most important, in my perception, is compassion for ourselves. When people are abused, their/our emotions are often controled by the abuser....an external force. When we are healing, we often look for compassion externally as well, and just as we may have become dependant on the abuser for our emotions, we then may become dependant on someone else for compassion.....to help us heal.
We may find people we can trust, who have compassion, and one of the healthiest things we can do, in my perception, is be compassionate with ourselves. It is important to strengthen ourselves so if we talk about our story, and some people are NOT compassionate, it doesn't matter. Make any sense?May 2 2013: What I feel ,firstly it can be due to societal "stigma" people don't want to open up.
Secondly , avoidance from reminding self, something unacceptable happened sometime back.
troy sharma
Jun 1 2013: Most of the time its easy to hide the emotion and look happy rather then talking about them. Even if you open up you may not be sure if anybody will understand you. According to me, our language is not that developed to explain human emotion properly. You might be feeling sad and you can not quantify it.May 31 2013: I was in an abusive marriage.... For me I started really letting people know when I saw that there weren't many men talking about being victims in abusive relationships... and with that said I think one of the biggest reasons people don't talk about it or share their experience is because for what ever reason we think no one wants to hear it... Its some how not important enough to share.
- +2
As a male when i told people i was divorced it seemed like there was alot of judgement, so when some asked what happened i would just say it was an unhealthy relationship... then a few i guess would pick up on my meaning and say something akin to its good you got out... and this frustrated me especially since in comparison women seemed to be more able to talk about it.
then going online I found only a few people trying to raise awareness of "Male Battering" followed by a slew of insults and ridicule...
so, i say if it happened it happened... and sharing what happened to you may help others deal with what happened to them, it can also help others realize and escape whats happening to them.
May 31 2013: Sebastian,
I think sometimes people have difficulty hearing the stories of abuse because they don't know what to do about it, and that may feel frustrating, so it may appear that they don't care. Some people DO care and will listen.
Although I volunteered in a shelter for women and children, we often had abused men call in for advice. There is also sometimes abuse with same sex partners.
I agree that sharing our stories may help others to deal with their experiences, and may facilitate people making healthier choices regarding relationships.Jun 1 2013: Sorry to hear about your experience; I've had the same for 50 yrs! I recommend "Lovefraud" blog site as well as Dr. Rob. Hare's books. He's the leading expert on psychosis. But they all say that it's good to educate others even if they chose to call us "crazy"! 10-20 symptoms everyone should know.
Yen Yang
May 31 2013: in my case, it is not. :) i have let go of it and i have moved on. i guess for some people, the scar is still there and it hurts them to open pandora's box, letting all those bad things come back to life. recalling everything is for them, reliving every single happening.
- +2
May 31 2013: I'm happy that you are free :) Congratulations, I hope you have a wonderful life.May 31 2013: My wife was once a young girl like you. She was when I met her. And I suspect that you and she share many similar experiences. Even the bad experiences in some way. My wife is Filipino. My family is Filipino. And my child is half-Filipino. But it is the Filipiino half that makes our child so special to us. You live in a beautiful country. You are surrounded by a very special nation. Please be Filipino. Always. And believe. It is always Filipino to believe.
You are young. You are beautiful. And you are free. And because you are young, you have a future. Don't waste that gift. I am glad that you know about Pandora and her box. Keep that one closed. Put it away. But keep it safe. That is the story of Pandora and her box. But especially keep that box closed & safe & hidden away from everyone but yourself. And don't be like Pandora and open it. That was her mistake. You are the protector and guardian of that box. So be careful. But be alive. And be free. God gives you that blessing when you are young. And it goes away when you are old. You are strong today in ways that you do not understand; but you will when you are old. So think about that. It can be so hard to be strong, when you feel yourself getting old.
So please keep yourself well and safe. Be smart, not stupid like so many others. One day when you are old, you will find that box again. And on the day you find it, you will learn something very important about how you have lived your life. For when you find that box again, you will find it open. And that will be a mystery, because you did not open it yourself. And if you have lived well, and have done all that I say, and all that you know you should -- there will be a treasure there inside that open box.
You are young. You are beautiful. And you are free. Live well. And find for yourself that treasure some day. Remember what an old man tells you today. And be that treasure. Isa akong Filipino, pagpalain kayo ng DiyosMay 31 2013: Study hard. You had to do a lot of work to gain entrance to U.P. U.P. is still one of the top Universities in Asia. Chemistry is hard. So stay on top of that. And promise yourself to earn the good grades that everyone tells you are important. They really ARE!
Oh, and sorry I can only give you my blessing in Tagalog. If I could, I would say it in Cebuano. My mother-in-law speaks Warai (Visaya). I asked for help but she's busy making lunch. So I have to leave her alone. Lunch is coming, so good-bye and good-luck.Jun 1 2013: The scars remain no matter how much you try to forget.May 29 2013: I think it could be that the person feels ashamed or embarrassed for allowing another human treat them with no respect and no love. Especially after leaving their abuser, few people decide not to talk about it because the issue does not physically exist anymore. However, most people forget that the biggest damage is psychological. I know from having friends and family members experiencing similar situations. The psychological damage can follow a person for a very long time.
There are many other reasons, but I think this is one of the most common.May 29 2013: I personally have never experienced the lack of courage to share past abuses. It is cathartic and the basis of most psychological counseling. However, if I were the abuser rather than the recipient of abuse, perhaps this would take far more couraage as one would have to admit to a character flaw which needs correction. This brings up the issue of fear (of being found out) which might inhibit our desire to share. Just a thought...
May 29 2013: It's a good thought M-L Reifschneider, because generally, one who abuses, lacks self esteem, confidence and courage. Sometimes, one of the underlying dynamics of abuse, is that an abuser can feel superior by abusing another person....putting them down, so to speak as they try to elevate themselves. This feeling is generally very superficial and can be on several different conscious or subconscious levels.
Rather than consider it a "character flaw", how about thinking of it as a learned behavior because I think that is generally what it is. Most abusers have been abused.
May 31 2013: Again Colleen, I urge you not to make statements like this, from your comments it's clear that your an intelligent and caring person.
But saying.."Most abusers have been abused", already makes the abusee a further victim, and in my previous reply to your kind comment, I have to say.....I dont believe it is written in stone.
As I said, abusee's can have a depth of character and a determination of will that allows them to overcome even the most horrific of circumstances.
And they can break this cycle. They can choose not to abuse. They can choose to be better.
The abusee, you see in my book is the one with the inherent power, and we need to support them in gaining that freedom, in gaining their self worth, because they are worthy, we really need to support and vocalize that support, not only individually but as a society. We need to reinforce at every turn that - abused people - have our help, what ever help they need.
We need to stop reciting stats that we and they have the power to overcome.
Because once free...Everything is their choice, their options are limitless, that should be ours and their goal.
May 31 2013: Thanks Tify,
I try to be as compassionate and caring as possible. I also ask you to be respectful and accepting of my way of dealing with the question, as you have insightfully stated in a previous comment...
"Tify Ndanoboi
1 day ago: "...with respect there is no one right answer...."
It is a fact Tify, that most abusers have been abused. This does not, in any way justify abuse, and many people who have been abused DO NOT abuse.
I do not believe this statement "makes the abusee a further victim", and I'm sorry you feel that way.
It is information that is available and has helped me understand more of the underlying dynamics of abuse. There is no intent whatsoever, to further victimize anyone.
I absolutely agree that abusers AND victims of abuse can change and break the cycle. In order to do so, it helps to have all available information.
I have done my best to support victims of abuse for many years Tify, and I agree that it is very important to do so. Part of the support we can offer is information. Knowledge is power, and with more knowledge, we can sometimes move through the impact of abuse, and encourage and support others in that journey as well.May 24 2013: "Why is it so hard for one to open up about an abusive past?"
Maybe because of the present situation and that not enough time has passed.
May 24 2013: Very true Anna....opening up about an abusive past takes time, and it is important to patiently give ourselves compassion, empathy, and to build (or rebuild) confidence and self esteem.May 23 2013: I know some victims and coupled with shame is a frequent feeling by society and victim that it was the victim's fault. In sharing, it takes a desire to help others. It also seems difficult for people to believe that it actually happened in the way described. The evil that some can do is somehow beyond our ability to accept of others. These add to reticence to share. Abuse is often surrounded by system failure: individuals who did not act; those in charge of ensuring a safe environment who failed; and those in charge of checking safety and of fixing things in the aftermath may fail. General trust can be destroyed -only avoided if people act responsibly in the first place, rather than fall into a pattern of irresponsible behavior that enables abuse.
To fix? Therapy, obviously, and safe people/safe spaces are key. Also, time and timing: those under stress are more close with feelings or those who have not yet come to terms. I suspect there is a fear that disclosure will somehow come to define the victim so education of the non-abused is important to help them show belief and not be prejudiced against the abused. Once educated, if one falls abused, they may have different reaction and different expectations placed on others than currently. Compassion as a trait we expect of each other generally. How can society become more compassionate and responsible?
May 24 2013: Chris,
You ask..."How can society become more compassionate and responsible?"
One of the first steps is awareness, which has begun. For a very long time, abuse was not talked about, and as you say...it seems difficult for people to believe that it is actually happening as described.
It used to be common to think that abuse only happened in certain socio-economic segments of society, and we know that is not true. I think, in some instances abuse is "normalized", and that prevents people from addressing it. People sometimes don't know what to do, so they do nothing. As you say...abuse is often surrounded by system failures. I have volunteered in a shelter, family center, correctional facilities, and been a case reviewer for kids in state custody. We were seeing all the same families, going through these systems for generations. You mention some of the reasons why the systems fail.
I believe that our communication systems are going to help with awareness, because one very common underlying factor with abuse is isolation. If we can be aware and communicate our awareness, we may have a chance to become a more compassionate and responsible society.May 17 2013: I honestly think some people want to in a sense leave things behind. Sometimes it may hurt to "open up" and take another look at the scars. And maybe they haven't even fully healed yet so it seems sensitive when others touch on the matter.
May 22 2013: I agree Thaddea. It is easier sometimes to try to leave some things behind. The challenge with that concept, is that everything we have experienced, is part of us, so to try to leave it behind, and ignore the impact it has on our lives, I think complicates the challenge.
I agree that it may feel sensitive when others touch on the matter, which is why we, as individuals, probably will not face something until we are ready to face it, and we are all different in that respect. For what it is worth, I started to feel better when I began to speak about my experience, and that may not be the same for everyone....I just want to share my own perception and experience.
May 23 2013: itis almost remarkable how negative things can help us grow.
May 23 2013: It is indeed remarkable Thaddea.....when/if......we recognize that possibility.
Many of us have experiences in our lives that are not pleasent, and may challenge us to the bottom of our hearts. We can hold onto the confusion, frustration and pain our entire lives, which becomes a burden, weighing us down in every aspect of our life......and/or.....we can learn and grow from the situation by moving through it to the best of our ability.......do you think so?May 16 2013: Hi Kate,
There are some good comments already on this thread with insightful understanding of why it is difficult to open up about an abusive past.
It was difficult for me to talk about what happened in my home, because it felt so odd, crazy, dysfunctional, and horrible. As a kid, I imagined that families were all like the Brady Bunch....caring, loving, kind, helping each other all the time, supporting each other and comfortable with their family.
I was comfortable with my mom and 7 siblings, and our father was very violent and abusive. As a kid, I didn't realize that this behavior was common in many families. As an adult, I volunteered at a shelter, and the stories I heard over and over again were unbelievable. When I realized that the behavior was MUCH more common than I ever suspected, it gave me the courage and motivation to speak publically about it, which I did for many years, in addition to volunteering in the shelter.
I also volunteered with the dept. of corrections doing programs mostly with offenders of domestic violence.
There is stigma. We do, as children living in challenging circumstances block things from our minds and hearts. It was when I was speaking with collage students and facilitating discussion groups that I started remembering quite a bit that I had blocked because of the fear. As the students asked questions, it stimulated memory of situations that were difficult to talk about. There is pain with reliving the experience, there is fear of judgement and labeling, shame about unacceptable behaviors, that as a child, we had no control of.
What I discovered when speaking about it however, is that most people are kind, accepting, and compassionate, which gave me the courage to continue speaking about it, and it was healing for me.
May 17 2013: Thanks for sharing, you're a shining example of how an abusive past can be vanquished to being just part of the past, and joy and success can be in everyone's future.
May 17 2013: Thank you for sharing as well Don. One of my messages, is that WE CAN move through the challenges of having lived with abuse. It IS part of the past, an experience I learned from, and hopefully can help support others in a similar journey.
Comment deleted
May 22 2013: Yes Kate, it is a common response, and I think it is a built in protective mechanism. Perhaps we only remember certain things at a time when we are able to deal with the memory? Healing, may continue for our entire lives, as we explore information.
In my 20s, I thought I had it all figured out....I understood many things on some level, and I thought....ok....I'm done with that!
In my 30's, with more exploration, more information, understanding and acceptance, I thought.....there...now I've got it!!!
In the 40s.....similar...more exploration, information, understanding, etc. What I started noticing, is that each new discovery gave me the motivation, confidence and courage to face more, with myself and others who were on a similar journey.
So, you get the picture....now close to 70 and still exploring, which I will be doing until I take my last breath.
Healing does not usually happen overnight, because we can keep delving for more and more information if we wish. The first steps are sometimes difficult, and once we get the hang of it, I find it fascinating and empowering, as well as healing:>)May 22 2013: Thanks Kate.....mutual admiration:>)May 31 2013: It is interesting that you point out that you did not discuss these matters in part because they felt odd and crazy and you thought other families were like the Brady Bunch. Just as commonly, I would think, and I expect this has been reported already in this busy thread, kids don't share things because they think what they are experiencing is very common and what all children experience at home, so why mention it?
May 31 2013: Good point Fritzie, and as far as I am aware, I don't think this has been addressed in this discussion. It often depends on what a child is experiencing in their neighborhood.
My siblings have a different perspective than mine for example. When they were young there were many large families in the neighborhood, and apparently, there was abuse in a lot of them. My siblings often say it was happening everywhere in the neighbor, so they didn't think anything about it....they thought it was common.
By the time I was born 9 years later, I was the only little kid in the neighbor because most of the kids had grown up, so all the other houses were pretty quiet.May 2 2013: Society keeps people in line using the "shame" factor. One step might be to write it all down. Take a step back and imagine it as someone else's story.Jun 2 2013: Thanks Colleen.
Kate: It's because I didn't come foward just after it happened and I'm kicking myself about that. Oh I definitely won't be seeing them again. If I saw him I'd kill him. I wasn't in contact with them anyway for other reasons by the time I remembered. I blame her for letting it happen, which is maybe a bit unfair. She's not guilty of anything but being a twat. She knew nothing about it, but she refuses to accept it now. I don't think she would have accepted it back then either, she'd have accused my Dad of putting me up to it.Jun 1 2013: I was abused by my step dad when I was eight. The feeling was indescribable. I spent a lot of time after that in shock. I tried to come forward but couldn't. In the end I repressed it. It felt like I was dragging a huge weight behind me whatever I did. It still does to some extent, but it made me stronger. 18 months ago I remembered what happened. It gave me a nervous breakdown. The abuse feels recent. It's like I've picked up where I left off. The worst thing for me is knowing how much that changed my personality. I would have been a much nicer person now if it hadn't of happened, or if I had the courage to come forward sooner. I kept putting it off. I didn't even know you could repress memories at the time. I would have been capable of forming long term relationships and I don't think I would always see the worst in people or get wound up so easily. I told the police 6 months ago but there's not enough evidence for it to go to court. You don't seem to stand a chance unless there's multiple complaints. I keep wondering what would have happened if I had remembered when I was still living at home and still in touch with him and my bitch-twat mother. If I had confronted him with her there it would have been obvious from his reaction that he's as guilty as hell. She only believes what she wants to be true unless it's so obvious it's undeniable. I don't think it's ever something I'll even start to get over. I've been having counselling and I'm about to start a new specialised counselling but I don't know if it will help. I can't even cry. I haven't cried since I was 11, although I did shed one tear when David Tennents Dr Who died (: (no joke). It gave me a split personality and every time I start to feel like the pain's coming to the surface I switch over to psycho mode. I'm not sure whether it's a gift or a curse. It makes me able to think in ways I wouldn't be able to otherwise. I don't think it's something I can ever get over, although compared to some I had it easy.
Jun 1 2013: A wal,
I am so sorry you had that challenging experience. One thing you say is..."I would have been a much nicer person now if it hadn't of happened"
A wal, it happened, and it is sad that it happened. However, you probably didn't have a choice as a child? As an adult who now understands more about it, you can be the person you want to be.
"...or if I had the courage to come forward sooner. I kept putting it off. I didn't even know you could repress memories at the time." (read some of the comments on this thread)
We usually deal with this issue when we are ready, willing and able to address it. You say...you didn't know....that is totally understandable. There have been comments on this thread about repressing abusive, violent experiences.....did you read through the comment thread?
When we repeat the sayings....."I could have been"....."I would have been"....".I might have been"....etc.,.......we continue to keep ourselves in a victim catagory.
Believe in what you are doing with counceling.....we never know for sure if it will help, and we can always try......belive in yourself my friend.
Jun 1 2013: I've read some of them. I will read them all but not all at once. Small doses. It's just hard to take that I very nearly came forward to a teacher (I just couldn't even bring myself close to telling a family member) but I bottled it at the last second. Things would have been very different if I had come forward back then.
It's not as simple as being the person you want to be. It took me along time to undo some of the damage when I was growing up, although I didn't know what the damage was from back then. I knew something wasn't right but didn't really question it. It's weird looking back at all know. In a way it doesn't seem real. That's a defence mechanism that they're going to try to strip away. That should be fun.
Jun 1 2013: Hi A wal, and thanks for your reply. The only reason I suggested reading the thread of comments, is because sometimes when we hear other people's stories, we realize that we are not so "different". You are wise......small doses!
Yes....things may have been different "back then", and give yourself credit to know that you were not ready. I honestly don't think that we deal with this "stuff" until we are fully ready to do so. Lots of times, we have blocked the memory for a reason....it is painful to remember.
I didn't say that being the person you want to be is simple.....especially when we have an abusive background. You know how you say....small doses? That is absolutely true. We can START becoming the person we really want to be when we start facing it.....make any sense? It took me a long time to be the person I wanted to be too A wal, and I can confidently say that it is possible, and you are worth it!
I understand what you say....""in a way it doesn't seem real". I have flashbacks sometimes, and I think/feel similar.....was that real? Yes, and it doesn't scare me anymore. You hang in there my friend.....ok?Jun 1 2013: People subjected to abusive, controlling, bullying or aggressive people live with psychological chains. No one can remove these chains except the person themselves. The chains feed the person with feelings of shock, fear, guilt, depression, anxiety, anger and shame - so they are very powerful indeed.
If the person is strong enough to over come their own psychological chains the emotional release and sense of freedom and peace is enormous. Life can be lived once more.
No amount of help, love, cajoling or shouting can make a person let go of their own psychological chains. Some people never let then go. Denial helps to mask the symptoms of these chains, but denial can never rid a person of them.
The chains are undone by free will - a relinquishment of the need to control, an acknowledgement of the wonder of life and an acceptance of 'what is'. When people take back their own power the chains melt away. They have no power at all.Jun 1 2013: Because an abusive past is an insecure past. We don't like to share our insecurities. It makes us feel that we will be seen as being lesser to others by sharing our insecurities. And they're memories we would rather not think about, so talking about them seems like it would bring those abusive memories back even stronger than just thinking about them to yourself. I'm not afraid to share my own story, so I can't say I know this for sure, but it to help someone to open up to their abusive memories, telling them very clearly that you care for them, you don't want to judge them, and you'd like to see them improve in any way possible. And physical contact helps people feel more comfortable, so this may sound strange, but touch their upper arm softly with your hand. People are more likely to trust you. It's a sign of care and emotional support. There needs to be more than simply talking. Physical contact can have a great effect on a person opening up and being trusting. Showing empathy, emotional support, and maybe some level of physical contact (not always the physical contact is needed. Contact may even trigger the memory fear if the contact is similar to the abuse they received.) is helpful to encourage someone to open up about an insecure topic for them. In short, help them feel secure if you want them to share an insecurity.
Jun 1 2013: Austin,
Physical contact does not always help people feel more comfortable for the reason you insightfully give....it may trigger memories of previous abuse.
Many people have been beaten, molested, inappropriately touched, sexually assaulted, etc. Touching is NOT recommended.
Also, in certain cultures, touching (other than intimate relationships in private) is offensive, so touching may be offensive because of someones abusive history, and/or because of a cultural belief.May 31 2013: The values of this society encourage us to dominate, in all areas.
The excess of domain, is the cover letter of the abuse, in all areas.
Moderation is not a apptitude in the first world, like it or not.
pat gilbert
May 17 2013: The main reason is that the abuser does not want them to open up about it.
- +1
May 17 2013: Another good point Pat! As kids, we were always told..."what goes on in this house, stays in this house...don't tell anyone about it", and the warning was often delivered with threats if we ever did talk about it outside the home. If there is intervention, the abuser may lose the control s/he has over the victim.
May 17 2013: Not wanting to get caught is the primary reason that abusers kill their victims and why snitches are despised. Either way this can encyst that area of a person's life. IMO it would be cathartic for the OP to talk with someone about the incident.
May 17 2013: Agree Pat, and now there ARE people who are listening! When I was a kid, there were no shelters, and anyone who reported abuse (medical professionals, educators, etc.) were opening themselves to a liability suit. I went to 12 years of catholic schools, and a couple times I tried to talk with a nun or priest about what was happening in our home. They told me to keep quiet about such things....my father was a good man!!!
Sometimes, my mom would give me a note which asked the nuns to please feed me and let me sleep that day because I had not eaten or slept in the home. Do you think any of those nuns wondered why a 6 or 7 year old kid could not eat or sleep in her home???
Now, medical professionals and educators are required to report abuse if they even suspect it, so that has changed for the better.
Also agree about snitches being despised. Those of us who recognize abusive behaviors are not well liked by abusers, because I think they sense that we recognize them.
pat gilbert
May 17 2013: Colleen you could not have gotten worse advise from the Nuns, ironically the road to hell is lined with good intentions.
- +1
This is one part of regulation I agree with.
Complacency or tacit agreement with the status quo are the epitome of evil.
May 17 2013: I KNOW that NOW Pat, but as little kids, we were told the nuns and priests were god's representatives, they had all the "right" answers because they were so holy, so we were supposed to listen to them and obey! That was one of the first contradictions I started seeing in the church even as a little child. We were taught to love and respect each other.... and.... it's ok to abuse and beat up people you supposedly to love?
I, and 7 siblings went to catholic schools, and over all those years, there were many signs of abuse, which were ignored. One of my brothers fainted at a football practice because he had not eaten for 3 days. The coach took him to his own home and fed him, but nobody asked why he had not eaten. They would have found out that our father decided that week that the grocery bill was too high, so he put a chain around the refrigerator, and we didn't
You're right...complacency and agreement with the status quo is another reason it is difficult for people to talk about an abusive past. If everyone around them (parents, educators, religious leaders, etc.) is accepting the behavior, what is a little kid to think?
That was one of the factors underlying the sexual abuse of kids by priests. There were quite a few cases in this area, and I read some of the testimony. These kids were told to obey whatever the priest told them, and do what he wanted. One 65 yr. old man said he KNEW it was wrong, but his parents had told him to obey the priest, and the priest reminded him that he would go to hell if he didn't obey!
The concept to obey, no matter what, is detrimental to kids. They need to be taught to think, feel, act and react, and NOT simply obey!May 17 2013: The most important thing is to LOOK, I might of mentioned it a few times?
But basically I agree


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I hope I'm putting this in the right place. There's a thread about technical problems on this forum over on the CA forum, and it just seemed to make more sense to start one here.
My technical problems: It sometimes takes me several tries to sign in. When I do get signed in I often don't get the flags to let you know there have been new posts added to threads. And, often, the pages are very slow to load.
My question: Will there be a place here to trade/sell DW stuff?

subset: commoncrawl


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July 22, 2013
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Action/Adventure, Comedy
Retired black-ops CIA agent Frank Moses reunites his unlikely team of elite operatives for a global quest to track down a missing portable nuclear device. To succeed, they'll need to survive an army of relentless assassins, ruthless terrorists and power-crazed government officials, all eager to get their hands on the next-generation weapon. The mission takes Frank and his motley crew to Paris, London and Moscow. Outgunned and outmanned, they have only their cunning wits, their old-school skills, and each other to rely on as they try to save the world-and stay alive in the process.
Rated PG-13 for pervasive action and violence including frenetic gunplay, and for some language and drug material.
Visit the official site
Cast: Bruce Willis, John Malkovich, Anthony Hopkins, Helen Mirren, Mary-Louise Parke
Produced by: Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Mark Vahradian
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Written by: Jon Hoeber, Erich Hoeber, Cully Hamner, Warren Ellis, Lionsgate Films
Running time: 1hr 56min
Opens: Jul 19, 2013 Nationwide


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Foxes and hounds are usually enemies, but Roxy has lived for 13 years alongside dogs, going for 'walkies', playing fetch and chewing bones.
She was rescued by staff at Nuneaton and Warwickshire Wildlife Sanctuary, after being found almost strangled hanging off a bridge from rope around her neck.
But as volunteers at the sanctuary nursed the red fox back to health, they noticed she had canine tendencies and was used to human interaction.
When Roxy had recovered enough to be released back into the wild, staff were worried she had become too domesticated to survive - and were forced to let her stay at the sanctuary full time.
Lucky Roxy now enjoys a dog's life - playing with squeaky dog toys, chasing balls, and chewing on bones in the sanctuary's gardens.
She enjoys a daily walk with the centre's dogs, and walks to heel on the lead.
She even snuggles up to staff for tummy tickles and wags her tail in appreciation.
Geoff Grewcock, who runs the sanctuary, said: 'We found Roxy dangling from a bridge, caught in a rope. She was very lethargic, and obviously very ill.
'She seemed to be used to human interaction, so we believe someone had tried to hand rear her for a time.
'As we nursed her back to health, we realised she was far too tame to ever survive in the wild, so she made her home here.
'She's ever so friendly, and loves playing with all the dogs we have here.
'We have six foxes at the sanctuary, and although Roxy will occasionally have a sniff as she walks past them, she much prefers playing with the other dogs.
'But she seems to love human interaction most of all. She's very spoilt but she's such a lovely girl she deserves it.
'She's a bit of a diva - she turns her nose up at raw meat, and will only eat cooked chicken.
'We do get a lot of funny looks walking her around Nuneaton town centre on a lead with the other dogs - people tend to do a double take.
'She might not be your average fox, but she'll have a home for life here, and she's a delight to be around.'
The RSPCA advises against hand rearing foxes unless absolutely necessary, because they become 'imprinted' and lose the ability to fend for themselves.


text:
Inside the Raspberry Pi Factory 120 120
Posted by samzenpus
from the take-a-look dept.
from the take-a-look dept.
An anonymous reader writes "Here's a photo walk through of how Raspberry Pi boards are made at a Sony factory in South Wales, UK. The factory says that the multiple automated and manual checks have meant that only two of the 150,000 boards made there have been shipped with defects."


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Quarterly Report: 2013, October - December (Q2), Coffman Cove
Coffman Cove
Danielle Lindoff
DCRA Regional Office:
Gov't Type:
Second Class City
Agreement Date:
City of Coffman Cove
Assessment Status:
Assessment Date:
Exp Date:
Last Updated:
Community Sanitation Overview:
The City of Coffman Cove is located on the northeast coast of Prince of Wales Island 42 miles southwest of Wrangell. The city operates a Class 2 water treatment system and a wastewater collection system. A city-run solid waste collection service is also available, whereby garbage is collected locally and then dumped at a landfill facility 35 miles away in Thorne Bay. Electricity is provided by the Alaska Power Company.
RUBA Status & Activities This Qtr:
Juneau RUBA staff worked closely with the former city clerk this quarter on election issues. The elected city council is ultimately responsible for utility service decisons. Additionally, the treasurer was moved into the city clerk position and will now be performing duties of both positions. RUBA staff assistance was requested to train the new clerk on specific duties pertaining to writing minutes, drafting ordinances and resolutions, as well as council meeting preparation. RUBA staff developed a standard weekly teleconference to introduce new topics and review the previous weeks' lessons. One of the newly elected city council members attended the RUBA 32-hour Utility Managment for Elected Officials training in October and the city administrator attended the 32-hour RUBA course on Planning Management for Rural Utilities in December.
RUBA Activities for the Coming Qtr:
RUBA staff plan to offer a class on Personnel Management that the current Administrator and other staff is insterested in attending. RUBA staff will continue to work with the newly promoted clerk on learning different portions of her duties as well as provide ongoing assistance as needed. The City of Coffman Cove continues to meet all the essential and sustainable indicators on the RUBA assessment.
Essential Indicators:
26 of 26
Sustainable Indicators:
27 of 27
Total Score:
53 of 53
Essential Indicators
All revenues and expenses for the utility are listed in the utility budget.
The utility has adopted a balanced realistic budget.
Monthly financial reports are prepared and submitted to the policy making board.
The utility is current in paying all water/wastewater electric bills.
The utility has on hand a year's adequate fuel supply or it has a financial plan to purchase an adequate supply.
The utility is receiving revenues (user fees or other sources) sufficient to cover operating expenses.
Sustainable Indicators
The utility is receiving revenues (user fees or other sources sufficient to cover operating expenses and Repair & Replacement (R) costs.
YTD revenues are at a level equal to or above those budgeted.
YTD expenditures are at a level equal to or below those budgeted.
A monthly manager's report is prepared.
Budget amendments are completed and adopted as necessary.
Finances Comments
The city's fiscal year runs from July 1 to June 30. The FY13 budget realistically shows a projected increase of four percent in water and wastewater utility expenses. These expenses take into account increased insurance rates, planned repairs and maintenance, and freight charges. The city anticipates that user fees will be sufficient to cover all of the utility's associated expenses in FY13. The city contracts with Alaska Business Partners, a Ketchikan-based bookkeeping service, to have monthly financial reports prepared for the city council. These reports include a balance sheet and a budget versus actual comparison on the profit and loss statement. The reports show the gross profits, expenses, and net income of the city's utility enterprises for the relevant time period. A thorough, written manager's financial report is also provided to the council at each regular meeting which explains income and expense amounts and narrates potential cost-saving financial strategies. The financial reports show that year-to-date revenues are at those budgeted and that year-to-date expenditures are below the amount budgeted for the relevant portion of the current fiscal year. The Alaska Power Company (APT) provides electrical service to the City of Coffman Cove. RUBA staff reviewed five service statements and found that the utility is current in paying all of its electric bills to APT and that Power Cost Equalization (PCE) credits are applied as appropriate.
Accounting Systems
Essential Indicators
The utility has adopted a collection policy and actively follows it.
The utility bills customers on a regular basis.
An accounts receivable system is in place which tracks customers and reports past due accounts and amounts.
An accounts payable system is in place.
The payroll system correctly calculates payroll and keeps records.
A cash receipt system is in place that records incoming money and how it was spent.
The utility has a cash disbursement system that records how money was spent.
Sustainable Indicators
A chart of accounts is used that identifies categories in a reasonable, usable manner.
Monthly bank reconciliations have been completed for all utility accounts.
The utility has a purchasing system that requires approval prior to purchase, and the approval process compares proposed purchases to budgeted amounts.
Accounting Systems Comments
Bills for city services are mailed to customers the first week of each month on a postcard that includes the customer's name and address, the amount due for water and wastewater services, previous statement balances, late fees, net balances, and the due date. While the postcard billings have saved the city significant money on postage, upon request, standard statements enclosed in an envelope are provided to customers with privacy concerns. Customers have until the 25th day of each month to submit their payments by mail, in person during the city's business hours, by credit card, or through a regularly occurring 'auto-pay' charge system. If a customer does not pay within 45 days, their account is considered delinquent and the city actively enforces its adopted collections policy. That policy is outlined in Title VII of the Coffman Cove Municipal Code and provides for a late payment fee, disconnection, reconnection fees, and denial of other city services such as harbor, internet, and garbage service. Delinquent accounts may also be referred to a third-party collection agency. Customers may, however, appeal any decision resulting in these actions to the city council at the next regular council meeting. QuickBooks accounting software is used for the accounts receivable, accounts payable, and payroll processes. Customers are also offered a written receipt of their service payment from a receipt book that records the customer's name and address, the date, the payment amount, what the payment was for, the form of payment, and who the payment was received by. All payments are then recorded in a detailed logbook and the QuickBooks system which can clearly identify customers who are current in their payments and those who are 30 days, 60 days, or 90 days past due. The city's cash disbursement system consists of a logical chart of accounts, a purchase order process, and a check register. The carbon copy purchase orders are individually numbered, show how money will be spent, and include space for an authorizing signature. Section 4.04.050 of the city's code of ordinances only mandates that purchases of supplies, materials, equipment, or contractual services costing more than $2,000 require prior approval of the city council. However, purchase orders are completed by utility staff prior to every purchase and all purchases are closely monitored by the city administrator.
Tax Problems
Essential Indicators
The utility has a system to accurately calculate, track, and report payroll tax liabilities.
The utility is current on filing tax reports.
The utility is current on making tax deposits.
If there are any past due tax liabilities or recorded tax liens, a lien release has been issued or a repayment agreement has been signed and repayments are current.
Tax Problems Comments
The City of Coffman Cove contracts with Alaska Business Partners in Ketchikan who accurately calculates, tracks, and reports the city's payroll tax liabilities. The IRS Taxpayer Advocacy Office confirmed on December 5, 2012 that Coffman Cove is current in its federal tax reports and filings and that the IRS has no liens against the city. The Alaska Department of Labor and Workforce Development confirmed on December 5, 2012 that all state tax payments are current as well.
Personnel System
Essential Indicators
The utility has a posted workers compensation insurance policy in effect.
Sustainable Indicators
The utility has adopted and uses a Personnel Policy, which has been reviewed by an attorney, AML or Commerce for topics and language.
The utility has adequate written job descriptions for all positions.
The utility has adopted and follows a written personnel evaluation process that ties the job description to the evaluation.
The utility has an adequate written hiring process.
The utility has personnel folders on every employee that contain at least: I-9, Job Application and Letter of Acceptance.
The utility has a probationary period for new hires that includes orientation, job training/oversight, and evaluations.
The utility provides training opportunities to staff as needed and available.
Personnel System Comments
All city employees are covered by an Alaska Municipal League Joint Insurance Association (AMLJIA) workers compensation insurance policy. The FY13 policy is effective from July 1, 2012 through July 1, 2013. The policy covers work-related accidents and occupational diseases up to the Alaska statutory limits for each occurrence. Proof of coverage is posted at the city office. RUBA staff verified that the city is current in its payments to AMLJIA and that adequate funds have been allocated in the annual budget for payments over the remainder of the fiscal year. The City of Coffman Cove implements a comprehensive personnel management system with the mayor, vice mayor, and city council continually reviewing personnel matters. A personnel handbook adopted by resolution on March 15, 2002 outlines the hiring and evaluation process, conditions of employment, a probationary period, disciplinary and grievance procedures, and general workplace expectations. The outdated and unenforced personnel section outlined in their municipal code was formally repealed in August 2012 by ordinance. The adopted ordinance also permits the city council to formally adopt and amend a the separate personnel handbook that has been used in practice, by resolution. All city staff, including the water and wastewater operator, have formal written job descriptions that explain their position's purpose, duties, supervisor, and required skills and qualifications. The descriptions also list whether the position is full-time or part-time, whether travel is required, and the position's salary range. Each employee undergoes an annual performance review which evaluates how well the employee is meeting their position's duties on a one to five scale. The review also considers job knowledge, the employee's representation of the city, communication skills, and goals as agreed upon by the employee and city administrator. Signed copies of the job descriptions and performance reviews are filed in individual personnel files. The files also contain W-4s, Employment Eligibility Verification Form I-9s, copies of relevant certifications, and letters of acceptance. The city continues to budget for and provide training opportunities to its staff as needed and available. City staff have successfully completed several of the 32-hour RUBA management trainings, including 'Financial Management for Rural Utilities' in August 2011 and 'Clerks Management for Rural Utilities' in April and September 2012. RUBA staff has provided onsite training to the city council and city staff as requested.
Organizational Management
Essential Indicators
The entity that owns the utility is known; the entity that will operate the utility is set.
The policy making body is active in policy making of the utility.
The policy making body enforces utility policy.
The utility has an adequately trained manager.
The utility has an adequately trained bookkeeper.
The utility has an adequately trained operator or operators.
The utility has adopted the necessary ordinances (or rules and regulations) necessary to give it the authority to operate.
Sustainable Indicators
The utility has adopted an organizational chart that reflects the current structure.
The policy making body meets as required.
The utility complies with the open meeting act for all meetings.
Organizational Management Comments
The City of Coffman Cove owns and operates the community's sanitation systems. Ordinances giving the city the necessary operational and regulatory authority have been adopted and properly codified in Title VII of the local municipal code, which is readily available in print at the city office and online at the city's website. The seven-member city council is the city's governing authority and the utility's policy-making body. The council holds regular meetings as required by Alaska Statutes Title 29 on the third Thursday of each month. To comply with Alaska's Open Meetings Act, the city consistently posts notice of each meeting at least five days in advance at the city hall, the library, the post office, a local liquor store, and a local grocery store. Each notice indicates the type of meeting to be held, as well as its location, date, and time. The city council is active in policy-making for the utility, as evidenced in the six months of council meeting minutes reviewed by RUBA staff. The meetings minutes show that council is provided with written financial narratives, briefings on ongoing utility upgrade projects, staffing issues, training requests, and concerns of the public. The minutes also show that municipal acts, including resolutions and budget amendments, are adopted as necessary and in accordance with standard rules of parliamentary procedure. The city council has given itself the authority to amend its utility fee schedule and enter into billing arrangements and repayment plans with utility customers by resolution. All additional rules and regulations for water and wastewater service are outlined in Chapter 7.04 of the municipal code. The chapter's provisions are properly enforced; customers are assessed late fees, issued delinquency notices, and disconnected from service as required. The city administrator serves as utility manager. the administrator has received formal training from RUBA staff in the roles and responsibilities of public officials, ordinances and resolutions, budgeting, rate setting, Title 29 of state statute, the local municipal code, strategies for effective meetings, the Alaska Open Meetings Act, executive sessions, ex parte contact, and conflict of interest. From years of operating her own small business, the city administrator also brings critical financial management experience the city. She and other city officials actively seek management assistance from RUBA staff when necessary. As noted in previous sections, the city utilizes the professional services of Alaska Business Partners in Ketchikan for most of its financial, accounting, tax-payment, and bookkeeping needs. Staff at Alaska Business Partners are willing and able to provide city officials with the financial resources and information that they need to effectively manage the community's utilities. Additionally, the city recently hired a new treasurer and a new city clerk who will be cross-trained to assist in utility billings and bookkeeping. These staff participated in the same formal trainings as the city administrator and the city clerk has received one-on-one training from RUBA staff on elements of her job description. The State of Alaska's Division of Water has rated Coffman Cove's water treatment system at the Class 2 level based on the plant's various components. Its primary operator, is fully certified with a Level 2 endorsement that expires on December 31, 2012, and has already obtained the requisite number of Continued Education Units (CEUs)to renew certification. The city council has approved and formally adopted an organizational chart that reflects the current staff structure of the city.
Operation of Utility
Essential Indicators
The utility operator(s) are actively working towards necessary certification.
The utility has a preventative maintenance plan developed for the existing sanitation facilities.
Sustainable Indicators
The manager receives a monthly O&M report from the utility operator and routinely "spot checks" the facilities to see that the maintenance items are being completed.
The utility has a safety manual and holds safety meetings.
Utility facilities have not suffered any major problems/outages due to management issues that are unresolved.
The utility is operating at the level of service that was proposed.
The operator provides status reports to the manager on a routine basis.
The utility has completed and distributed its "Consumer Confidence Report".
The utility is not on the "Significant Non-Complier" (SNC) list.
The utility maintains an inventory control list.
The utility maintains a critical spare parts list.
Operation of Utility Comments
As noted in the 'Organizational Management' section, the primary utility operator is adequately certified at the appropriate classification level for the city's water treatment and water distribution systems and continues to meet his CEU requirements on time. His current water treatment certificate expires December 31, 2012. The operator's distribution certificate is current and expires December 31, 2013. The primary operator is assisted by three uncertified - yet adequately trained - back-up operators. All utility staff follow a safety manual and preventative maintenance plan specific to Coffman Cove's equipment and participate in regular safety meetings. The meetings are documented on forms provided by AMLJIA that list the date of the meeting, the training topics discussed, the titles of any materials issued, and the names of employees present. Resources explaining general safety practices such as lifting and common workplace hazards are also available. Coffman Cove's sanitation facilities have not suffered any major outages due to management issues and continue to operate at the proposed level of service. City officials consult with the primary operator regularly and written utility status reports are given to the council each month. The utility now has an inventory control list, as well as a list of identifiable critical spare parts that includes the quantity on hand and quantity needed. It also includes a description of the parts as needed. VSW conducted a site visit in September to observe the progress of the replacement of a leaky valve vault of lift station #1 and install a new control panel. The Project Engineer for VSW reported that CRW advertised for bids from specialty contractors. The lowest bid was $27,000, more than the project can afford. Utility Staff advised that they can seal the leaks with Avanti AV-330 grout, which the city has on hand, for a fraction of the contractor's cost. CRW gave the city the permission to do this. The project required removing an existing power pole and placing it in a new location. The pole had been removed and replaced but in a location different than that shown on the plans. The location shown in the plans is in rock. CRW approved the change.
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Sentinell HTML Theme!
Sentinell is a minimalist modern template with a twist. Unique menu and portfolio/collage presentation gives some punch to otherwise very conservative design. 60 ready to go color presets, easy color edits, and 12 grid system make it very flexible. There are over 400h put into the design and development of this template.
Some of the theme Features
- HTML5 , with CSS3 (except for browser-vendor settings)
- Optimised and flexible css styling
- Tested in major browsers: IE7 , IE8, IE9 , Firefox 3, Firefox 4, Firefox 5, Chrome, Opera, Safari
- Flexible 12-grid system
- Blocks and containers system
- Unique portfolio items presentation
- Pixel-perfect styling
- Multiple color presets (60)
- Left and right sidebars
- Resizeable sidebars
- Prettyphoto plugin integration
- Dummy content with multiple page template examples for portfolio, contact form, blog and homepage
- Working contact form with validation and ajax results
- Simple newsletter form with csv file creation
- jQery enhanced
- Fresh and unique menu presentation
- Multi-level dropdown menus
- Collage for home page (highly recommended to have 24 items/images ready for this feature)
- Automaticly resizing wide nivo slider, and classic nivo slider options for those who won't like the collage.
- Css buttons
- Pricing tables in 5 colors with onhover effect
- Accordion toggle for faq/spoiler/download use
- Styled pagination
- SEO friendly
- Works great on iPad
- Sprites technique used for better use of server resources and better user experience
- FontFace and Google Webfonts used
- Solid typography with lists, warning boxes, tables, blockquotes, code blocks, buttons and dropcaps
- Over 3500 lines of code in style.css
- All the complex styling images take only about 22KB!
- Button, and pricing blurb PSD files included in the package for easier customization
The images in the preview were shot by me or my friend, if you'd like to use them commercially, please contact me.
Resources used
- icons by Liam McKay
- Social Networking Icons by Komodo Media
- Silk icons by Mark James
- Dortmund Icons by PC.DE
- Nivo slider
- prettyphoto by nomarginforerrors
- phpMailer by Worxware
- LeagueGothic font by The League of Moveable Type
- Open Sans font by Steve Matteson (from google webfonts)
- hoverIntent
- Twitter plugin (not used in 1.0 version)
- Color animation plugin by Edwin Martin
- jQuery BBQ : Back Button & Query Library by Ben Alman
- jQuery hashchange event by Ben Alman
- jQuery imagesLoaded plugin by Paul Irish
- JQuery Random Plugin
- jScrollPane by Kelvin Luck
- Vegas – jQuery plugin by Jay Salvat
- Cookie plugin by Klaus Hartl
- boilerplate
- Photos for the preview: Michal Ufnal, and myself. If you want to use them commercially, please contact me first.
I bought your theme and I like it, but I need help with XYZ .
Thank you! I will answer all of your questions, and try to help with every possible issue as fast as i possibly can. Please use envato contact form to send me a message, write about problem in detail, and if possible – throw me a link showing the problem.
Also, please bear in mind that I live in europe so if you are from other continent, responces could take up to few hours, as I'll be probably still sleeping when you are awake.
I bought your theme but I think you should include XYZ / I dont like it at all.
Please explain what is not working to your liking, what should I improve to make it better. I really want you to enjoy this theme to it's fullest.
Is there wordpress version of this theme coming?
Yes! As fast as I could do it Leave a comment if you like it, to motivate me to work harder!
Is this theme hard to set-up?
It's definitely not hard, it does however need some preparation. Reason is the complex nature of collage/portfolio presentation. You shouldn't be scared of that , but if you are – wait for WordPress edition of the theme, it will be easy to set up.
Thanks for reading!


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Public Health: Driven by Passion, Striving for More
Dr. Howard Koh, Assistant Secretary for Health, Addresses SLU Audience
Howard Koh, M.D., M.P.H., the nation's highest ranking health professional, shared his passion for public health with a packed auditorium of SLU students, faculty and staff members on Monday.
"My father would have been very proud of me, and my mother would have believed it," he quipped after being introduced to the crowd of more than 250 who attended his talk at the health sciences education union.
|Assistant Secretary for Health Howard Koh, M.D., MPH, left, was invited by Dean Edwin Trevthan, M.D., MPH, to present a talk that was part of the School of Public Health's Lecture Series.
As Assistant Secretary for Health -- "the ASH" --, Koh oversees the Office of the Surgeon General and Commissioned Corps of the U.S. Public Health Service. He is the nation's top advisor on public health issues to the Secretary of U.S. Health and Human Services. His talk was part of the School of Public Health's Lecture Series.
Koh leads an array of programs that run the gamut from preventing disease and promoting health to reducing health disparities and improving vaccine programs and tobacco control.
"I spent a lot of my career in tobacco control and to be called 'the ASH' is a bit ironic," he said.
Koh's commitment to public health grew out of his interactions with patients. As a young physician, Koh frequently saw patients who didn't reach their full potential for health because they had conditions that could have been prevented. Some died of preventable causes.
"My intent was to cure each person put in front of me, to lay my magic hands on patient after patient and cure them with my tremendous knowledge," he said. "I saw so much suffering that could have been prevented. I said to myself, 'there's got to be a better way than this' -- and that's the definition of public health."
He added that, "Sometimes an ounce of prevention is a ton of work."
Koh characterized public health as "standing for something bigger than yourself." Systemic health problems only can be solved when professionals from many fields including medicine, nursing, law, business and public health collaborate on a solution, he said.
"I want to thank everyone here for being part of health care during an incredible time for our nation. I can't think of a more exciting time for us to be part of this dialogue," Koh said. "We need each and every one of you more than ever before. Your journey -- our journey -- is not just a journey of your mind but also of your spirit and soul. It's intensely mission driven."
Koh, who was appointed by President Obama and unanimously confirmed by the U.S. Senate in 2009, talked about the impact that health care reform through the Affordable Care Act already is having on the health of the nation.
"It gives all patients the three things they want: good care, good insurance coverage so they can get good care, and they don't want to be patients in the first place."
He said he was proud of key individual provisions of the plan:
- Insurance companies no longer can refuse to offer coverage to children who have pre-existing health conditions, an expansion that will apply to adults in 2014.
- Insurance plans now are prohibited from putting lifetime limits on coverage, which will make medical bankruptcies an occurrence of the past.
- Children up to age 26 can stay on their parents' health insurance plans.
- New health plans and insurance policies now are required to cover many recommended screenings and vaccinations, which eliminates cost as a deterrent to some preventive care.
"Health reform is the law of the land," Koh said. "We are implementing it and we're going to make a difference in the health of our nation."
Learn about the School of Public Health.
Discover the School of Public Health's global commitment.
Read more about Dr. Howard Koh.


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Moderators: Tonyblack, Jason, Toothy
Bouncy Castle wrote:He didn't try driving José into it, did he?
The Mad Collector wrote:It averages about 60 feet from the middle of the bridge to the water Bonnie, there used to be sailing ships this far up the river and they had to be able to get under it. The river is also very variable in depth, at the moment it's quite low but in January it was over 20 feet higher and flooded the town so they had to allow for the high water level and then a masted ship on top of that.
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Neither of them had been heard from since sometime Sunday night, according to Sgt. Billy Byrd with the sheriff's office
The Medical Examiner's Office took their bodies for autopsies. Both had gunshot wounds, and a handgun was recovered from the scene. It's not clear who shot whom, said Maj. Tommy Ford.
"We're still working on that; the autopsy results will prove key in determining that," Ford said. "We don't want to speculate on that kind of thing."
Kilpatrick's family and some friends
"I don't think he would've hurt her because he loved her too much," Martha Johnson, Kilpatrick's sister, said. "He just told me Saturday night 'I
Kilpatrick and Dickson were married until 2010, but they continued to live together after their divorce, Johnson said. She added it was not uncommon for Kilpatrick and Dickson to argue, but that Kilpatrick would walk two doors down to her place and let things calm down after a fight.
Kilpatrick was mellow, active and health conscious, Johnson said. She said Dickson was active but she had health issues that required a surgery in
"He wasn't the type to hit a woman," Johnson said. "He loved her to death, you know. He really did."
SOUTHPORT — Two people were found dead Monday morning, and sheriff's deputies are investigating it as a murder-suicide.
Authorities were conducting a welfare check at 9219 Resota Beach Road when they found the bodies of Mack o. Kilpatrick, 61, and Kelley Anna Dickson, 48, according to investigators and family members.
Check back throughout the afternoon for updates.
Below is an earlier version of this story:
SOUTHPORT — Sheriff's investigators are on the scene of an incident in the 9200 block of Resota Beach Road, where two bodies were found Monday.
No further information was immediately available.


text:
College of Allied Health
Welcome to the College of Allied Health
Transforming lives through the health professions is what we are all about and the College of Allied Health is a great place to seek out how God will use you to serve others. Our purpose in the College of Allied Health is to mentor and train students who have a heart for service. Combining rigorous scientific training with opportunities to be the hands and feet of Christ are the hallmarks of our school.
Those who choose careers in allied health know that it takes a team of healthcare professionals to provide for the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of people. Thus, we integrate learning among all of the professions in many ways so that as students are being trained at the undergraduate level they will gain a level of appreciation and understanding for the entire scope of health care and service to others.
The College currently offers degrees in the Department of Health Sciences and the Department of Kinesiology.
Our goal is to be a premier regional provider of allied health professions training and we want you to join us! I hope you will contact me soon so we can begin a dialogue about how God will use you to serve others.
Charles D. Sands, PhD, MEd
Dean, College of Allied Health
Scholarship Opportunities
The College of Allied Health offers numerous scholarships for students who have declared a major within the Department of Health Sciences or the Department of Kinesiology. Applications are available through the Office of Financial Aid or by contacting the College of Allied Health at firstname.lastname@example.com.
For more information about scholarships, please visit our Frequently Asked Questions, or you may also contact our office at (951) 343-4619


text:
I preferred the one I gave you but anyway.....
You're going to need to resize that sig.
You cant fool me you know you.
THE same Irky Jerky that posted a picture of Curt Hawkins with all of Zack Ryders catchphrases?
Nope just thought you had an awesome username
My Favourite Username to date. I love mint berry crunch those 3 South Park episodes were just genuis
© 2011 eWrestlingNews, All Rights Reserved.


text:
What is Interdisciplinary Studies?
The Interdisciplinary Bachelor of Arts (IBA) is characterized by its flexibility. No matter how many institutions you have attended in the past, the IBA is designed to accept credits from any accredited university—often satisfying some or all general education requirements. The rest of your program is then tailored to fit your individual goals and interests.
At least two approved 12 credit hour areas of emphasis are required to complete the Bachelor of Interdisciplinary Studies degree. The areas of concentration are not restricted by academic areas, but rather thematic areas of interest. Areas of emphasis are defined by the student and advisor. Within each area, 6 of the credit hours must be upper division.
Admission requirements
- A minimum of 30 credit hours of college credit at an accredited institution of higher learning
- GPA of 2.0 or higher
- Out of high school for 8 years
- Special permission from the program director


text:
Since 1999, Northwest Classic Auto Mall has offered cars from 1989 and older vehicles, both locally and worldwide. Whether you're looking for an older classic, hot rod, rat rod or a vehicle in the 80's, we invite you to browse our listings of vehicles.
This is the "Green Hornet" model with the glass-enclosed dual headlights. Northwest Classic Auto Mall advertises this vehicle for the owner. If you're interested in this vehicle... More


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Bouncy Castle wrote:Yeah, but I'm not sure what the UK has ever done to Canada to deserve the presence over here of Justin Bieber.
raisindot wrote:You Brits best be careful or we going to export Howard Stern, Donald Trump and all the Kardashians to your shores with a DO NOT RETURN label.
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Jump to content
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|Destiny in Gamers' Hangout
Posted 12 February 2013 - 13:37
Posted 12 February 2013 - 15:05
Posted 12 February 2013 - 15:08
Posted 12 February 2013 - 20:33
This under 200$ CPU shoot-out from Tom's Hardware just came out. If gaming is the focus, you might find your answer in there (I haven't read it yet). As a rule of thumb, I always go for the more powerful GPU.
I say this in every thread, but it depends on the resolution.
Assuming 1680x, the 660 will do fine, and be a better overall computer. Assuming resolutions higher than that, I'd take the 660 Ti and just plan on upgrading the 955 at some point when the new AMD processors come out.
A 600W PSU isn't overkill and I'd recommend you go with one of that power. It's always good to have a little headroom so you don't stress it out under full load.
The i5 is definitely the better processor, but the 660 Ti is a better GPU than the regular 660.
A CPU cooler is useless unless they plan on overclocking, so I'd recommend getting rid of that and then going with the i5 and 660 Ti.
An i3 is even faster than that AMD CPU, but if they want a quad core, then go with whatever the cheapest i5 is that you can find.
Posted 12 February 2013 - 20:52
I mainly went with it for the noise-level and ease of cleaning as from my experience stock-coolers are pretty terrible
Posted 12 February 2013 - 20:55
Hmm I opted for the Intel for now as I figured it is more futureproof for him as he can always easily exchange the graphics card himself in the future while a CPU upgrade would be far more complicated But still thanks for the opinion too^^
Posted 12 February 2013 - 21:29
Posted 12 February 2013 - 21:47
Posted 12 February 2013 - 22:58
The Core i5 750 stock cooler is almost impossible to clean. One of the worst cooler i ever used. I actually replaced it after 2 years as i was not able to remove most of the dust even using a can of dust off and the temp of my cpu was farily high (close to 100 celsius under load).
Not a bad point, I have an i5 and a GTX660 myself so... I think it's a pretty good setup.
I currently have the AMD 955 and it's a great CPU as it has served me well, however it's now 2 years (possibly more) old and it's starting to show it's age verses the newer CPUs. Consider looking into an AMD 8350. Looks like a very decent CPU for the price tag and closely rivals intel's offerings
I'd go with the AMD Build. It will perform better in gaming with the 660 Ti. Now if you have wiggle room for the Intel build; upgrade the PSU to at least a 500 watt, and upgrade the video to a 660 Ti. Although the difference between the 660 and 660 Ti is not great.
Posted 13 February 2013 - 13:31
I5 and get the Coolermaster Hyper 212 EVO it's a cheap cooler that does very good for the money.
I also got the Antec HCG-620M it's a good bang for the buck modular PSU that's very good. I got one in this build and another in another...
What is the PC going to be used for?
Posted 13 February 2013 - 13:47
nah the evo was easy to install. very easy...


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Over 47,000 residents call Brentwood home. As more and more people move to East Contra Costa County, Brentwood will continue to experience tremendous growth. With great weather, the Delta only 15 minutes away, plus over 50 parks, 15 schools K-12, a community college, hiking trails, and recreational facilities including 3 golf courses, this family-oriented community is a wonderful place to live. And, our historic Downtown is the scene of many community events each year including the Annual CornFest, Starry Nights Concerts, Art, Jazz, and Wine Festival, and the Holiday Parade.
Brentwood City Government
Settled in 1874, the City of Brentwood was incorporated in 1948 as a General Law City. The City Government consists of an elected two-year term Mayor and four City Council members who serve four-year overlapping terms with municipal elections held every two years. The Council member receiving the most votes during the election earns the honor of serving as the City's Vice-Mayor.
For more information on the City of Brentwood, visit the City's website at www.ci.brentwood.ca.us
Your City Council
Bob Taylor, Mayor
Robert A. Brockman, Vice Mayor
Chris Becnel, Council Member
Brandon Richey, Council Member
Erick Stonebarger, Council Member
City Council holds regularly scheduled meetings on the second and fourth Tuesday of each month in Brentwood City Hall Council Chambers starting at 7:30 p.m.
City of Brentwood City Council
708 Third Street
Brentwood, CA 94513
(925) 516-5440
Fax (925) 516-5441
E-mail: allcouncil(at)ci.brentwood.ca.us


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Bachelor Degrees for Traditional Undergraduates.
Earn Your Master's or Doctorate at Judson.
Busy Adults, Finish Your B.A. the Convenient Way.
Call Judson Your "Home Away From Home."
Online Degrees for Graduates and Busy Adults.
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Virginia L. GuthAssociate Vice President for Student Success/University Registrar
Maria L. AguirreAssistant to the RegistrarGraduate ProgramsStudy Abroad ProgramsCommencement
Heather JohnsonAssistant Registrar Adult Programs
Susan J. KunzeAssistant to the RegistrarTraditional ProgramsReporting
Erika MillerStudent RecordsTranscript OrderingEnrollment Verifications
Kirsten OlsonTransfer Student Director
Jill A. HargisGraduation Auditor
Judson University, Shaping Lives that Shape the World