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Boise Weekly Vol. 19 Issue 33
Idaho's Only Alternative
LOCAL, INDEPENDENT NEWS, OPINION, ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT WWW.BOISEWEEKLY.COM VOLUME 19, ISSUE 33 FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 TAK EE E ON E! ROTUNDA 9 FR LUNA TOONS Proposed school budget cuts no laughing matter FEATURE 12 CYBER LOVIN' The odds are good, but the goods are odd NOISE 26 LYRICALLY LITERARY Seattle's Ivan & Alyosha kick off tour in Boise REC 34 RIDING THE RAILS Rail jam�dance party�rap battle invades Bogus "Sixty below zero wasn't that bad." CITIZEN 11 2 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M BW STAFF PUBLISHER: Sally Freeman firstname.lastname@example.com Office Manager: Shea Sutton firstname.lastname@example.com EDITORIAL Editor: Rachael Daigle firstname.lastname@example.com Arts & Entertainment Editor: Amy Atkins firstname.lastname@example.com Features Editor: Deanna Darr email@example.com News Editor: George Prentice firstname.lastname@example.com Staff Writer: Tara Morgan email@example.com New Media Czar: Josh Gross email@example.com Calendar Guru: Heather Lile firstname.lastname@example.com Listings: email@example.com Proofreader: Annabel Armstrong Interns: James Ady, Eric Austin, Alex Blackwell, Kat Thornton, Jordan Wilson Contributing Writers: Sarah Barber, Bill Cope, Andrew Crisp, Stephen Foster, Guy Hand, Damon Hunzeker, David Kirkpatrick, Justin Peterson, Ted Rall ADVERTISING Advertising Director: Lisa Ware email@example.com Account Executives: Sabra Brue, email@example.com Jessi Strong, email@example.com Doug Taylor, firstname.lastname@example.com Nick Thompson, email@example.com Justin Vipperman, email@example.com Jill Weigel, email@example.com CLASSIFIED SALES email@example.com CREATIVE Art Director: Leila Ramella-Rader firstname.lastname@example.com Graphic Designers: Adam Rosenlund, email@example.com Jen Grable, email@example.com Contributing Artists: Conner Coughlin, Derf, Jeremy Lanningham, Glenn Landberg, Laurie Pearman, E.J. Pettinger, Ted Rall, Patrick Sweeney, Tom Tomorrow CIRCULATION Shea Sutton email@example.com Apply to Shea Sutton to be a BW driver. Man About Town: Stan Jackson email@example.com Distribution: Tim Anders, Mike Baker, Andrew Cambell, Tim Green, Jennifer Hawkins, Stan Jackson, Barbara Kemp, Michael Kilburn, Lars Lamb, Brian Murry, Amanda Noe, Northstar Cycle Couriers, Steve Pallsen, Patty Wade, Jill Weigel Boise Weekly prints 30,000 copies every Wednesday and is available free of charge at more than 750 locations, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies of the current issue of Boise Weekly may be purchased for $1, payable in advance. No person may, without permission of the publisher, take more than one copy of each issue. SUBSCRIPTIONS: 4 months-$40, 6 months-$50, 12 months-$95, Life-$1,000. ISSN 1944-6314 (print) ISSN 1944-6322 (online) Boise Weekly is owned and operated by Bar Bar Inc., an Idaho corporation. TO CONTACT US: Boise Weekly's office is located at 523 Broad St., Boise, ID 83702 Phone: 208-344-2055 Fax: 208-342-4733 E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.com www.boiseweekly.com Address editorial, business and production correspondence to: Boise Weekly, P.O. Box 1657, Boise, ID 83701 The entire contents and design of Boise Weekly are �2010 by Bar Bar, Inc. EDITORIAL DEADLINE: Thursday at noon before publication date. SALES DEADLINE: Thursday at 3 p.m. before publication date. Deadlines may shift at the discretion of the publisher. Boise Weekly was founded in 1992 by Andy and Debi Hedden-Nicely. Larry Ragan had a lot to do with it too. BOISE WEEKLY IS AN INDEPENDENTLY OWNED AND OPERATED NEWSPAPER. NOTE SOON ENOUGH THEY'LL ALL BE SMART First things first: Turn to Page 38. See that square-shaped bar code? It's called a QR code. They're not new (they were developed in 1994), they're huge in Japan (but what isn't?), and they're among the newest ways media is bridging the gap between the print and digital worlds. The New York Times magazine readers may remember the magazine's recent 10th anniversary cover that was a giant QR code made with balloons. When scanned, the code linked to a web page of five short videos commissioned for the 10th annual ideas issue. Even the Idaho Statesman ran a piece last week educating readers on what QR codes are and how to use them. Here's how the two-dimensional image works: Download a QR scanner app on your smartphone (NeoReader, QR Scanner and Optiscan are a few cross-platform options). Scan the barcode. In the case of the QR code on Page 38, the data that's been encoded is a link to a video of reporter Andrew Crisp putting the Demon's Delight Challenge at Superb Sushi to the test Man v. Food style. You can scan the code and your phone will take you directly to the video. No web navigation, no searching, no Googling, no time suck. Want to try another one? See Page 32. Scan the code, and you'll land directly on a page within our mobile platform containing movie times. In the coming weeks we'll be playing with QR codes in both editorial content and ads. In so far as editorial content is concerned, the codes will provide links to added-value content--movie times and accompanying video reports, for example, or related blog posts or links to additional photos. In News this week, you'll read a culmination of sorts in two of the biggest stories this year. In North Central Idaho, after months of back and forth, big rigs started rolling--at a walking pace, mind you--ConocoPhillips' mega-loads along U.S. Highway 12 en route to Billings, Mont. And in the other energy news, Alternative Energy Holdings Inc., the nuke plant development company to which Payette County has given the green light, is back in business after a judge lifted the company's asset freeze, which was put in place after allegations of fraud in December 2010. Finally, 'tis the season for love. Get one take on what that means in the modern world in this week's feature. --Rachael Daigle COVER ARTIST ARTIST: Jaki Katz Ashford TITLE: Fatal Attraction MEDIUM: Acrylic on canvas board ARTIST STATEMENT: So much of life's energy revolves around the concept of love. Whether we are getting it, losing it or using it we are preoccupied with it. And February is the month we celebrate it! See my exhibition of multimedia art-- frequently inspired by the good, the bad and the ugly of love--through the month at: Art Source Gallery. Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.com. SUBMIT Boise Weekly pays $150 for published covers. One stipulation of publication is that the piece must be donated to BW's annual charity art auction in November. Proceeds from the auction are reinvested in the local arts community through a series of private grants for which all artists are eligible to apply. To submit your artwork for BW's cover, bring it to BWHQ at 523 Broad St. All mediums are accepted. Thirty days from your submission date, your work will be ready for pick up if it's not chosen to be featured on the cover. Work not picked up within six weeks of submission will be discarded. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 3 WWW.BOISEWEEKLY.COM What you missed this week in the digital world. INSIDE EDITOR'S NOTE MAIL BILL COPE TED RALL ROTUNDA NEWS Mega-loads hit the road Nuke developer back in business CITIZEN FEATURE Love and/or Sex BW PICKS FIND 8 DAYS OUT SUDOKU NOISE BW catches up with Ivan & Alyosha MUSIC GUIDE ARTS Derrick Brown's rock 'n' roll take on poetry SCREEN Another You and Somewhere REC Touring rail jamparty-competition invades Bogus FOOD Chillin' with ice wine FOOD REVIEW Caruso's BEER GUZZLER CLASSIFIEDS NYT CROSSWORD FREEWILL ASTROLOGY 3 6 7 8 9 9 10 11 12 16 17 18 21 ROLLIN' ROLLIN' ROLLIN' ... News Editor George Prentice spent part of last week watching the first of the ConocoPhillips mega-loads get rolling in North Central Idaho. See the full story on Page 9 this week, and visit Citydesk for an account of what was happening here in Boise as Idaho Rivers United staged a protest. 26 28 30 WE GOT GAME BW's video game guru Michael Lafferty has the latest dish on video games set to be released on Tuesday, Feb. 15. The list includes several part twos and threes, including the much anticipated MvC3. 32 34 37 38 40 41 44 46 RIGGINS ON THE ROAD Finn Riggins waxes poetic about the diff between cats and dogs in a recap of their recent Northwest tour. REV YOUR ENGINES Desert racing season starts next week, and Steve Silva has the deets on the race and how to sign up. See Cobweb. 4 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 5 NORWAY By Samuel D. Hunter A Division of Oliver Russell Play Support Co-World Premiere Season Sponsor Season Media Sponsor Play Sponsor Play Sponsor MAIL DEATH ETIQUETTE Your article "Mourning in America" was fantastic and so correct (BW, Opinion, Ted Rall, Jan. 26, 2011). You hit the nail on the head. My only addition would be under "Etiquette After a Massacre." Item No. 7: Don't close Congress for a week. --Jean B. Smith, Boise it up with me, and we can have a conversation. --Eric Cole, Boise Evidently running SNUS advertisements has offended your readership's delicate sensibilities. Probably not raking it in from the cover price, I'm guessing. This just in from reality-ville: Turns out your money doesn't just fall from the sky no matter how much you whine, or perhaps David T. and Lucy can put their money where their mouth is. It occurred to me that BW has some other things that may offend other readers, so I have taken up their cause and celebrate our American right to complain about everything. Beer ads. Alcohol is bad. Shunned by Mormons and Muslims alike. And what about all the recovering alcoholics? Just think what they must go through as they thumb through the pages of tripe written by overzealous do-gooders. So, I really appreciate you assuming that I can't think for myself. You'll probably find a job with great bennies working as a state/federal employee. Hey, when you're not busy trying to impose your will on everyone else, you should slap yourselves. Then think about what you're saying and the implications it has. Hey, didn't the Third Reich have a moral and ethical obligation to protect the Germans from all the Jews? That worked out pretty well I think. Good work guys, I'll be sure to consult you before I do anything so it's not bad. --Jared Hamlin, Nampa should not be coddling to the establishment. Within the pages of BW, Ted Rall rails against "the man." Bill Cope alludes to politicians forming policy based on the amount corporations donate to their campaigns, food reviews are limited to local establishments and the BW Card only takes local eateries as clients. These are the reasons that I support BW. You are the voice of the local movement. I went through a recent BW and found 60 ads of Idaho businesses--or at the very least businesses with a local presence--to only three ads for businesses with no presence in Idaho. Of those three, SNUS stands out since it is part of an international corporation. I understand the need to meet the bottom line, but it seems contradictory for BW to accept money from the very establishment that is ostracized in every other aspect of the business. I would hope that the community could--and should--support BW. If we are not, let us know so that we can pitch in. The last thing I'd want to see is a full page ad for McDonald's or CocaCola in upcoming issues simply because you cannot meet the bottom line. I'm not going to picket your offices or even stop reading BW because of SNUS, but I would like to ask you to reconsider your acceptance of corporate dollars. Please step up and stay true to the local community. --Michael Rupp, Boise Tickets start at $15 www.BCTheater.org Jan. 26 - Feb. 19 KICKIN' UP SNUS DUST Recently, there has been discussion of why BW ran Camel SNUS ads. Some are outraged, and I can't understand it. An advertisement is just that, an advertisement. It does not force you to buy anything, it merely lets you know that a product is available. If you do not wish to purchase said product, you do not have to, and the people who paid to run their ad will not be coming to your home to make you buy their product. I am not a fan of Jersey Shore, so I don't watch. I am not a fan of Justin Bieber, so I don't listen to his music. Could I complain about him? Sure. Will it accomplish anything? No. I agree that we should all be allowed to voice our opinions and complaints, but I also feel that to attack a newspaper for running an advertisement that you do not approve of is unnecessary. BW has just as much a right to make money as any other business in America, and for anyone who doesn't work for them to tell them what they should and shouldn't run is preposterous. The newspaper is made available to the public, for free, every week. We should be thanking them, not tearing them down. Of course, this is only one man's opinion, so feel free to disagree. If you do choose to disagree, don't take it up with the BW, take CORRECTION The incorrect illustration appeared in last week's Citizen. This is the correct likeness for John Foltz. My issue with the SNUS ads is not with content but rather concept. As an alternative news weekly, BW S U B M I T Letters must include writer's full name, city of residence and contact information and must be 300 or fewer words. OPINION: Lengthier, in-depth opinions on local, national and international topics. E-mail email@example.com for guidelines. Submit letters to the editor via mail (523 Broad St., Boise, Idaho 83702) or e-mail (email@example.com). Letters and opinions may be edited for length or clarity. NOTICE: Ever y item of correspondence, whether mailed, e-mailed, commented on our Web site or Facebook page or left on our phone system's voice-mail is fair game for MAIL unless specifically noted in the message. 6 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M JEREMY LANN ING HAM Jumpin' Janet's BILL COPE/OPINION -- GOODTIME PUB -- "Welcome to Our World" A brief survey to determine fascist affinity Bill O'Reilly, that disturbingly dense presence who passes himself off as the voice of reason for Fox News, recently referred to "far-left Nazis." Now, you and I know that there can be no such thing as a "far-left Nazi." Saying "far-left Nazi" is like saying "Pentecostal atheist" or "carnivorous vegan." We would have more luck finding a "deciduous juniper" or a "ginormous Lilliputian" than a "far-left Nazi," yes? ... because you and I know that "far-left Nazi" is a contradiction in terms. There are any number of variations on the "far-left" theme--"far-left Maoists," "far-left Bolsheviks," etc.--but there can be no "far-left Nazis" simply because from the very birth of the Nazi scourge, the term has been used to identify a far-right phenomenon. Then I ask you, my erudite friends, how is it that you and I know this, but Bill O'Reilly doesn't? Aside from the obvious answer (that perhaps Bill O'Reilly is an ignorant dumbass who spent more time getting his hair styled-- when he had some--than learning anything useful) there must be something else at work here. Or else wouldn't those who work closely with O'Reilly set him straight? Ah, but it turns out that down at Fox News--and I do mean "down"--the ideological left is often identified with Nazis. As Jon Stewart demonstrated in one of those film clip montages the Daily Show is so good at assembling, it seems hardly a day goes by without someone in Fox's corral of talking screen savers either using Nazis as a simile for how the American left operates, or flat-out calling us Nazis. It's quite clear the right is trying to disguise their natural inclination to lean fascist by dumping the charge off on the left. Of course, sometimes we on the left are only minimally less guilty of crying "Nazi," even if we are more factually and historically correct. Just a couple of weeks ago, a Democratic congressman landed feet-first in some fake outrage when he likened the whoppers told by Republicans about President Barack Obama's health-care plan to Joseph Goebbels' famous dictum on the tactical advantage of telling enough lies, enough times. I have more than once mentioned that without a hefty dash of fascism in the right's hash, they would be left with little that appealed to their Teabagger base. So yes, the charge of "Nazi" flies both ways, and all too often over matters far too trivial to be attached to the most monstrous criminals of the modern era. But we need to remember, just because every Tom, Dick and Harry is calling every other Tom, Dick and Harry a Nazi, doesn't mean there aren't some real, honest-to-god Nazis out there. And after so much heated discussion over who should or shouldn't be calling somebody else a Nazi, I realized what we need to do to settle this, once and for all. We must go to some authentic, unapologetic Nazis and ask them whom they would name as their closest ideological cousins--the Democrats or the Republicans. After all, who better to recognize a Nazi-ish streak than a certified, bonded, peer-approved Nazi, right? But alas, I personally know no Nazis. Or anyone who will admit to being a Nazi, at any rate. I checked both the Yellow Pages and Craigslist but found no listings for local Nazis. I considered driving up north in search of anything that would guide me to a Nazi or two--a sign, as it were: "Sandpoint--Food, Gas, Lodging, Nazis--13 miles." But in the end, I decided upon a questionnaire. I cordially invite any and all Nazis within range of this publication to come out from under their rocks and participate in the survey. WHO'S YOUR NAZI? Find the Valentine's Spirit at Jumpin Janet's Singles Party Saturday the 12th! Stimulating Shoe Swap Games, Exhilerating Drink Specials, and plenty more titillating suprises all night long! Wi-Fi Friendly � Non-Smoking Choose an answer and then separate at dotted line and return to B. Cope, c/o Boise Weekly. 1. As a Nazi, who would you rather be stuck in a stalled elevator with: Bill Moyers Rush Limbaugh 2. Given your traditional Nazi disdain for racial and ethnic minorities, which most closely reflects your values: the Democratic Party's wide inclusion of African Americans, Jewish Americans, etc., in its ranks, and the left's long record of promoting civil rights for all Americans the Republican Party's continuing resistance to anything and everything that has been done to bring racial justice to America? 3. Based on your experience as a Nazi, would you say your extreme "Uber Alles" nationalism most closely resembles: the typical leftist's embrace of international art and culture, even if it comes from such inferior sources as the Slavic states, Massachusetts or even France the typical conservative's apathy for any cultural expression that comes from north of Tennessee WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M 4. Being a Nazi--possibly a skinhead and/or a Klansman as well--would you say you are more inspired by the oratorical flourishes and intellectual prowess of: Barack Obama Sarah Palin 5. Which political affiliation would be most likely to entice you back into "normal" American society by convincing you that you could still be a secret Nazi sympathizer even while passing yourself off as ... say ... a radio talk show host or a televangelist: the Democratic party, with its integrationist, evolutionist, environmentalist, trade unionist, hopey-changey faith in a brighter future for mankind the Republican Party, with its guns, Glenn Beck and unquestioned obedience to the doctrine of U.S. exceptionalism 6. When fantasizing of famous women dressed in tight rubber Nazi uniforms, are you more apt to picture: Maureen Dowd Ann Coulter BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 7 OPINION/TED RALL NEW FACE OF REVOLUTION After Tunisia and Egypt, the world NEW YORK--From the British newspaper The Independent: "Like in many other countries in the region, protesters in Egypt complain about surging prices, unemployment and the authorities' reliance on heavy-handed security to keep dissenting voices quiet." The problems that triggered the latest uprisings--inequality of income, frozen credit markets, unresponsive government--span the globe. The first regimes to be overthrown may be the most brutal U.S. client states-- Yemen, Jordan and Algeria. Central Asia's autocrats can't be far behind. But this won't stop in Asia. Persistent unemployment, unresponsive and repressive governments exist in Europe and in the United States. They are unstable and global revolution is imminent. Late last year I wrote a book, The AntiAmerican Manifesto, which calls for Americans to revolt against our out-of-control plutocracy and the corrupt political biarchy that props it up. I expected the right to react with outrage. To the contrary. While the desire for revolution is hardly universal among Americans, it is widespread and distributed across the political spectrum. Revolution, when it occurs here, will be surprisingly popular. Criticism of Manifesto centers not on my thesis that the status quo is unsustainable but on my departure from Marxist doctrine. Old-school lefties say you can't have revolution without building a popular movement. When revolution comes, it will follow a spontaneous explosion of pent-up social and economic forces. We will not need the old parties and progressive groups to lead us. Which is good because they aren't conditioned to create revolution. New formations will emerge from the chaos and they will create the new order. I argue that old-fashioned ideologies are obsolete. Left, right, whoever, must and will form alliances of convenience. The leftist critic Ernesto Aguilar is typical of those who take issue with me, complaining that "merging groups with different political goals around an agenda that does not speak openly to those goals, or worse no politics at all, is bound for failure." The revolutions in Tunisia and Egypt may be destined for failure, but it doesn't look that way now. Those popular insurrections have played out the way I predict it will, and must, in the United States: set off by unpredictable events and formed by the people. In Egypt, an ad hoc coalition of ideologically disparate groups has coalesced around Mohamed ElBaradei. "Here you will see extremists, moderates, Christians, Muslims, all kinds of people. It is the first time that we are all together since the revolution of Saad Zaghloul," a rebel named Naguib, referring to the leader of the 1919 revolution against the British, told Agence France-Press. ElBaradei's popularity, said Tewfik Aclimandos of the College de France, is due to the fact that "he is not compromised by the regime; he has integrity." This is how it will go in Greece, Portugal, England and, someday, here. There is no need to organize, just recognize revolution. What will set off the next American Revolution? I don't know. Nevertheless, the liberation of the oppressed peoples of the United States is inevitable. 8 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M NEWS/ROTUNDA NEWS GEOR GE PR ENTIC E GET A LOAD OF THIS Mega-loads hit the long and winding road GEORGE PRENTICE Anyone who thinks they know U.S. Highway 12 ought to drive across North Central Idaho at 2 a.m. in February. A scenic wonder that is Dr. Jekyll in the daylight becomes a terrifying Mr. Hyde in pitch darkness: two twisting lanes of pavement enveloped by sheer cliffs and the half-frozen Clearwater and Lochsa rivers. Anyone who thinks they know what a mega-load looks like ought to see one of the ConocoPhillips coke drums inching along U.S. 12. After being parked for the better part of a year on a vast open lot at the Port of Lewiston, the rigged-up cargo is now rolling thunder, dwarfing everything in its path. When the first of four Conoco loads left Lewiston on Feb. 1, hundreds of men, women and children braved the sub-freezing cold to line U.S. 12, creating a surreal parade-like atmosphere. Santa would have been hardpressed to attract such a crowd. But instead of cheers or laughter, the shivering throng remained oddly quiet. "Honestly, I'm somewhat sympathetic to the Conoco shipments," said John Fisher of Lewiston. "Those four loads need to get to the refinery in Billings, Mont. But for goodness sake, more than 200 from ExxonMobil? And even more after that?" Exxon wants to send approximately 240 mega-loads across U.S. 12, continuing up to northern Alberta's Kearl Oil Sands Project. Rumors swirled that a third oil company, Harvest Energy, wanted to send even more loads across the same route. "Yes, I can confirm that," said Adam Rush, spokesman for the Idaho Transportation Department. "ITD has begun preliminary conversations with Harvest about the possibility of more shipments." Harvest, recently purchased by the Korean national government for nearly $4 billion, wants to send 50 to 60 shipments to the oil sands once Exxon completes its shipments. "So add it up," said Fisher. "We're probably going to see these things on U.S. 12 for years." "Maybe even decades," said Linda Scott, another Lewiston resident. "And can we please talk about that road?" By all accounts, U.S. 12 is a destination byway. Revered by anglers, rafters and Sunday drivers, the views are breathtaking. But that's when there is a view to take your breath. You can't see much more than a few feet in any direction after the sun goes down. "It's an insane road to drive on at night," said Scott. "I used to teach in Orofino. I had several students die on that highway. I drove that road every day and every night. I know how dangerous it is. The traffic gets frantic WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M Protesters want to give Tom Luna detention. CHALLENGING LUNA'S LOGIC Mike Lanza, father of two Boise elementar y school children, stood on the steps of the statehouse as day turned to twilight on Feb. 7. "I know we have a lot of school kids here, don't we?" Lanza asked. About 100 school kids raised their hands. "Why don't you kids mingle together because under Tom Luna's plan you'll probably end up in the same classroom next year." Nervous laughter erupted. The rally, primarily comprised of parents, took aim at a sweeping proposal to reform Idaho's classrooms. Earlier the same day, Luna, Idaho's superintendent of Public Instruction, touted his proposal to the Senate Education Committee. The most controversial elements of Luna's plan include eliminating nearly 800 teaching jobs, increasing class sizes, requiring online learning and handing out lap tops to every high school student in the state. "The superintendent is flat out wrong on his class size logic," said Jeff Wilhelm, professor of English education at Boise State. "I have spoken to some of the top researchers in this area and they all tell me the same thing: You can't do more with more students in the classroom. Once you get more than 23 kids in a class, they will learn less. Teaching and learning are relational. They require personal interaction. So when the superintendent says the research is inconclusive, he's wrong." Penny Beach said her children are currently getting a great education at Longfellow Elementary in Boise, but she's worried. "I actually agree with some parts of Luna's plan," said Beach. "But there are some parts that absolutely enrage me. Increasing class size? Laying off or not hiring back 800 teachers? And using the money to pay for lap tops? It would be a waste of our tax dollars and probably end up costing us more money in the long run." Beach, Wilhelm and nearly 400 more made last-minute plans to attend the hastily organized event. "When I read what Luna was proposing, I was outraged," said Lanza. "I sent an e-mail to a friend, expressing my frustration. Well, my friend sent that e-mail to a few others, and they sent it to a few more. One woman said she sent my e-mail to 40 people. Today's event is a result of a groundswell of opposition to Luna's plan." The Senate Education Committee will continue to consider the controversial proposal with public testimony through Thursday, Feb 10. --George Prentice Three hundred tons and what do you get? Another day older and another delay. even if there's just one slow, small truck." The 700-page Conoco transportation plan promised that traffic wouldn't be delayed more than 15 minutes--20 minutes tops. But the best-laid plans of one of the world's biggest oil companies sprung a leak two days into the first trip. On Feb. 3, traffic was stopped five times for 29 minutes or more, and once for almost an hour. ITD and Conoco quickly re-crafted the travel plan before a second mega-load was allowed to leave Lewiston. Bad went to worse when a highly unpredictable challenge blew into town: an arctic blast that forced Conoco to halt its first shipment after traveling only to two of 17 checkpoints. When winter pulls over to a rest stop giving way to spring, another challenge looms. "Come March when the river levels come back up, the Clearwater and Lochsa will again become huge destinations," said Kevin Lewis. When Lewis isn't working as conservation program director for Idaho Rivers United, he's kayaking the Lochsa. "And that's right about the time that ExxonMobil wants to begin rolling their loads," said Lewis. "More than 200 of them. They'll be out there practically every day." Lewis said the whitewater of the Lochsa is among the best in the nation: "It's pristine, accessible and powerful." As a member of American Whitewater, Lewis said he's heard from kayakers and rafters from all over. "I'm receiving e-mails from Massachusetts, all of the Southern states, even Australia," said Lewis. "They're all giving me the same message: Protect the Clearwater. Protect the Lochsa." You can spot kayakers from the kitchen window in the Kooskia hillside home of Linwood Laughy and his wife Borg Hendrickson. For nearly half a century, they've rafted, hiked, fished and hunted through the upper Clearwater valley. Laughy and Hendrickson may easily be the valley's most famous residents. They've authored several best sellers and served as tour guides to over 5,000 guests. "We provide custom tours for the National Geographic Society," said Laughy. "But National Geographic doesn't bring guests to industrial corridors," said Hendrickson. Laughy said their concern for visitors is second only to their grandchildren. "There are Diego and Isabella," said Laughy. He paused to swallow through the lump in his throat. "Jack and Katie." His eyes welled up. "And 3-year-old Solana." A tear edged down his wrinkles. "I'm sorry. It's emotional for me." Laughy said the biggest sacrifice he and his wife paid over the last 10 months was time they could have spent with their grandkids. Instead, they logged thousands of hours in a legal battle against ITD and Conoco. Their first stop was Idaho's Second District Court in front of Justice John Bradbury. Ironically, BW found Bradbury nursing a cup of coffee at a tiny Lewiston cafe on the banks of the Clearwater the morning the first mega-load was scheduled to roll. Bradbury was hesitant to say anything on the record but when pressed, admitted that he had followed the story with interest. "Of course," said a smiling Bradbury. Laughy and Hendrickson went before Bradbury in August asking for a sympathetic ear in their mega-load challenge. "For me, it was never about whether I thought the loads were a good idea or a bad idea," said Bradbury, choosing his words carefully. "That's up to the governor and the Legislature. My sole role was to determine if the Transportation Department had followed its own rules. In my judgment, it had not." Bradbury slapped a temporary restraining order on the mega-loads, triggering a series of legal arguments 10 before the Idaho Supreme Court and BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 9 NEWS a special case hearing that stretched into December. Ultimately, ITD was given the green light to grant permits to Conoco. Far from U.S. 12, the mega-loads became a political hot button. Opponents protested on the steps of the statehouse and dumped letters and petitions on Gov. C.L. "Butch" Otter's desk, asking him to reconsider his support for the shipments. Meanwhile, 9 Boise Republican Sen. Chuck Winder tagged opponents as a "vocal minority supported by outsiders." One of Winder's top political contributors in 2010 was the Idaho Truck Political Action Committee. Laughy and Hendrickson said they have no political axe to grind. To them it's something much bigger than politics. "We're looking for some sense of justice," said Laughy. "This just isn't right." BACK IN BUSINESS Assets of AEHI unfrozen GEORGE PRENTICE The Feb. 3 federal court hearing against Alternate Energy Holdings Inc. had it all. Tales of extravagant trips, luxury automobiles and a pretty blonde were reminiscent of pulp fiction. And when all the melodrama ended, key questions remained. 1. Where did $19 million of investor money go? 2. Who is Jennifer Ransom? 3. Who or what is Bosco? First, the $19 million. That's the amount of investor money that prosecutors from the Securities and Exchange Commission said AEHI had spent without any explanation. That's the key reason the SEC asked on Dec. 16 for AEHI's assets to be frozen. Second, Jennifer Ransom is a pretty blonde. That's how her boss, AEHI CEO Don Gillispie, described her in a Jan. 10 disposition. Asked about his many international travels with Ransom, Gillispie spoke of their trips to the Far East. "Quite frankly, Asians like a pretty blonde face to look at," said Gillispie. "So it doesn't hurt." Gillispie hired Ransom in 2008. Just exactly what her duties were was the topic of much debate during the Feb. 3 hearing. AEHI attorneys presented her as a secretary, with "no day-to-day responsibilities." Her official title was senior vice president but Ransom was quick to remind anyone who would listen that she is no longer an employee of AEHI. Rather she is the president of Energy Neutral, a company founded by Gillispie. Finally, the mysterious Bosco. On numerous occasions during the hearing, attorneys referred to something called Bosco Financial, LLC, through which hundreds of thousands of dollars flowed. "Bosco is a family dog," Ransom told BW. "It's the name of my consulting company." Ransom confirmed that her only client is Gillispie's AEHI. To follow the SEC's case against Gillispie, Ransom and AEHI makes your head hurt. Here are the basics: Gillispie tried to shop a nuclear power facility to communities across Southern Idaho for nearly a decade. He had no success in Owyhee or Elmore counties, and had nothing but green lights in Payette County. With promises of thousands of jobs and an increasing tax base, Payette's Planning and Zoning Commission recommended that a parcel of land near New Plymouth be rezoned from agriculture to industrial in anticipation of Gillispie's dream. The price tag? Somewhere around $10 billion. Gillispie began raising capital. While AEHI stock hovered around the 10-cent mark for a couple of years, shares jumped to 77 cents by September 2010. The SEC accused Gillispie of a "pump and dump" scheme, misleading investors with allegedly fraudulent press releases and then selling the stock at inflated prices. The SEC also said that Gillispie and Ransom tried to hide their stock sales, inflated salaries and trips to exotic locales including Acapulco, Mexico, the Bellagio in Las Vegas and the Far East. AEHI attorney Richard Roth told U.S. Judge Edward Lodge that there were very personal reasons for moving around large sums of cash. Roth said Gillispie spent nearly $200,000 on a new home for Ransom's sister. Then, Roth said, Ransom sold AEHI stock to repay Gillispie, transferring the money from the Bosco bank account. More stock was sold and transferred from Ransom's Bosco account to Gillispie to buy a Lexus hybrid. In addition, Gillispie drove a Maserati as a company car. The SEC asked that AEHI's assets remain frozen, saying Gillispie and Ransom used the company as their "personal piggy bank." "This company is dying," pleaded Roth. "Mr. Gillispie and Ms. Ransom have nothing to live on." After lengthy closed-door negotiations, Lodge lifted the freeze. Simply put, AEHI is back in business. "I'm not supposed to talk to you," said Ransom outside the U.S. Courthouse in Boise. "But I will tell you that I'm thrilled. We can get back to work. We made a promise to build a nuclear power plant, and we're going to deliver that promise." SEC attorney Mark Fickes would not comment for the record but confirmed to BW that the file remains open on AEHI. WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 10 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly CITIZEN TRENT HERBST A dog's tale GEORGE PRENTICE JER EM Y LANNINGHAM Students at the Community School in Sun Valley are getting pretty excited. They can't wait for Saturday, March 5. It's not a holiday. That's the day the 2011 Iditarod begins in Nome, Alaska. These students will follow the race closely as Trent Herbst, one of their teachers, and 16 of his best friends mush their way through what is billed as "The Last Great Race on Earth." You've taught all over the world. Did you always want to be a teacher? No. I wanted to be a swim coach. But I had a strong desire to travel in South America, so I took a job where I was a swim coach and taught some elementary school in Buenos Aires. But life takes a turn. I was trying to bicycle from South America to Alaska, but I got mugged in Peru. I lost everything. By the time I made it back to my hometown in Wisconsin, I had to take a factory job. I eventually landed another teaching job in Santo Domingo in the Dominican Republic. That's where I met my wife, Candida. You had a dangerous brush with neartragedy there. I was in a bad motorcycle accident. I shattered my leg, broke an ankle and lost my spleen. It took about eight months to recover. Doctors told me that because I didn't have a spleen, I'd probably be constantly sick if I stayed in a developing country. We had no desire to return to the states, so I went to Europe. I taught in Bonn, Germany, for two years, and then in Zug, Switzerland. When or where did you have first contact with sled dog racing? My students in Germany wanted to learn about the Iditarod. So I learned along with them. When I moved to Switzerland, I took my fourth graders to sled dog races. After our daughter was born, we moved to the upper peninsula of Michigan where I worked at a sled dog kennel. You followed that with a move to Alaska to learn more about sled dog racing, but how did you sustain yourself? I worked with the mentally disabled at a community health center in Homer, Alaska. When did you race in your first Iditarod? In 2006. I figured it would be a one-time event, and I'd go back to a normal life. When did you come to Idaho? Right about the time of the race in 2006, I got a call from Laura Kennedy. We taught together in Germany. She had since become the principal at the Community School in Sun Valley. She asked me if I would ever go back to teaching. I said it would have to be a perfect spot. She said, "Why don't you come down to Sun Valley and at least say hi." Well, I've been here for five years. And now you teach in Sun Valley and race in the Iditarod each year. I teach my class in six-week units. We're currently in a unit called "threatened cultures," and I concentrate on arctic cultures in northern Canada and northern Alaska. I understand your students make boots for the dogs. I go through about two thousand booties a year. My students make about 200 to 300 of them. Is it true your students make your sled? You bet. The first one, three years ago, was made out of hockey sticks. It got busted up pretty bad during the race. Last year, we made a really good sled out of laminated ash wood. This year, we're attaching solar panels that we hope will power my GPS, iPod and head lamp. Give us the basics on the Iditarod. It's more than 1,000 miles. I stop about 25 times and camp outside with the dogs. What's the worst of it as far as the weather? Last year, it was 60 below. But there was no wind, so it wasn't that bad. Ironically, the colder it is, the better the dogs run. They're also nocturnal. The best hours for us are 4 p.m. until 10 p.m. and then again from 4 a.m. until 10 a.m. They live to run, right? Every year, I'm more in awe of what they're capable of doing. They get so excited when they're charging into a blizzard. For me, when I'm on the sled, it's like sitting in the first row at the Olympics. How many more years will you race? I always say this is my last one. But after this year, I definitely think I'll only run one more. When do you head north? The first week of March. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 11 Love SEX AND/OR The easiest stuff in the By Damon Hunzeker W ithout romance, we wouldn't find love. Without love, we'd be sad. Without sex, however, we would first be sad and then extinct. Sometimes sex leads to love, and sometimes love leads to sex--but of the two, sex is the most natural. Dogs try to do it with furniture and any part of any species within humping distance. Even plants engage in forms of sexual activity, though they don't end up with that dumb look on their faces that we do. Uninterrupted love is rare, but the ubiquity of sexual desire never takes a break. From advertising to zoo keeping, it's everywhere. The planets are about the only bodies in the universe that aren't trying to bump into and onto each other. Potential lovers these days are trying to point and click their way toward happiness. The vast quantity and varied quality of Internet dating sites has reached a staggering level. Like gambling, sometimes it works. Most of the time, it just foments excitement followed by queasiness and regret--kind of like eating a Boston cream pie or a box of those chalky little hearts with lame messages on them in one sitting. Despite the exponentially expanding population of profiles inhabiting the Web, people don't want to admit that they use them. They use fake names like "Cheekychick88." They disguise their images, sometimes blurring their eyes when they should blur lower. Myriad methods of meeting are out there, but regardless, watching happy couples flaunt their lust on Valentine's Day probably doesn't soothe the sting of solitude. Online dating, it's important to note, isn't just for lonely people--sometimes it's for those who think the orgy isn't big enough. If you're alone, this time of year presents a dismal and stubborn reminder--with the mandatory romance and forced bliss of Feb. 14--that you may never find love. You'll remain confined to your couch with nobody to talk to and nobody to share that stupid-looking orgasm face with. It's time to look away from the hand-holders and neck-nibblers, to forget about fondling your fickle Facebook "friend," to renounce restaurant reservations, to kick the crap out of cuddly-cute commercials and instead play solitaire with one hand stuffed in a tube of cookie dough. But remember--all hope hasn't been vanquished. This is 2011. You live in The Future. People used to have to find love and/or sex with "suitors" and "gentleman callers" who were close enough to hear them from across the fence. They would receive handwritten letters featuring words like "courtship." Then, once they found someone with a sturdy back for plowing and milking, they'd hurry and get pregnant, pumping out as many heirs as possible to help on the farm. They had to act fast before they turned 39 and died of tuberculosis. Technological advances have rendered the world a dwarf of its former self. Interested in meeting someone from Uganda for a moonlit affair? Looking for someone who gets aroused by incorporating jumping jacks and Silly String into sensuality? How about some good old-fashioned group sex? Are you into gay voodoo polygamy? Married women whose husbands don't know they harbor secret wrestling fetishes? Perhaps you want to settle down with a "normal" man or woman--maybe both. Or are you merely looking for a transsexual that knits gargoylethemed oven mitts? It doesn't matter anymore, because you can find whatever you want on the Internet--assuming you don't mind finding somebody who wants to be found on the Internet. You'll have to get accustomed to some things, though. Online dating services often prevent casual browsing without receipt of your e-mail address, biography, fingerprints and a DNA sample. Also, whenever the euphemism "a few extra pounds" is used, accompanying pictures are conspicuously absent. Datingsite diction is oddly regressive on the explicit sites. People always seem to be looking for others to "play with." They say things like "hubby OK if I play without him." It initially feels like Romper Room porn. Then you see the tattoos of spider webs covering up wrinkles and realize everyone's of legal age. Among the countless sites featuring people in the aforementioned description, innocence rears its occasional head, and you realize that the Internet is capable of nourishing genuine connections for life. At least it looks that way from the eHarmony commercials. It's probably closer to the type of connection-forlife that develops in other artificial environs--American Idol, for example. Whatever happened to that big, fat guy with the smooth voice? Nobody knows, and that's because the public's relationship with him was more analogous to casual sex than idolatry or love. The good thing about the vastness of online dating sites is that anyone, no matter how unappealing, can now get laid without paying for it. Take a look--most of them already have profiles and pictures uploaded. There's somebody out there for everyone. Unfortunately, nobody has an excuse for a sexless life anymore--not even married people. Ashleymadison.com is known as a site for people trying to cheat on their spouses--it was recently rejected as a Super Bowl advertiser--but while it features some of that, it's actually for anybody trying to have sex in all of the endless combinations imaginable. It's certainly not entirely adulterous. You'll find consensual straight couples looking for consensual gay couples, consensual gay couples looking for other consensual gay couples, threesomes looking for fivesomes. The pictures, if you're allowed access to someone's "private showcase," are often as graphic as anything in the most inglorious porn available. As is frequently the case on these sites, the attractive members tend toward tastefully enticing photographs while the monstrously unattractive people, for some unaccountable reason, display limitless confidence. That probably shouldn't be surprising, as it tends to mirror real life. Gorgeous professors usually keep their skirts on in public, but it wouldn't be shocking to see a tooth-damaged, mouth-breathing drunkard pull down his pants and scream, "Check it out!" A Twin Falls couple had an interesting Ashley-inspired experience recently. They--like most people with a profile available to 6 billion people--insisted on anonymity. According to the woman, 39, she and her boyfriend, 40, met a supposedly 37-year-old woman at a bar for a potential threesome. "We barely recognized her from the picture. She looked about 20 years older than she said. But that wasn't the worst thing. I talked to her for about five minutes before I found out she was a `professional,'" the woman said. "I just looked at my boyfriend while she was talking and mouthed `hooker.'" It's easy to imagine the rendezvous having gone worse, though. They could have met the guy on lesbianpersonals. com--yes, guy--who makes ice-piss sculptures. At least hookers offer something somebody somewhere wants. "It's probably something you should mention before meeting people," she added. "I mean, it's not like we were planning on saying, `How much do we owe you?'" While browsing profiles, you begin to realize that we're just like other animals--except we're not scared of vacuums, and we have clumsier mating calls. Both men and women adopt stunningly stupid pseudonyms on dating sites. They don't care if you see them abusing a turkey baster, but they insist that you call them--as a brief look at Ashleymadison ads from Idaho reveals--secret names such as "Ilikemilfs," "Crazyhotbiznatch," "Licklay69," "Swirleelvr," "Boob5" and "Brittany Paige." All right, maybe that last one strays from the theme a bit, but for the most part, it's stuff like "Lickerandsucker4u." Imagine how a real-world introduction would go if this sort of thing worked: "Hi, I haven't introduced myself. I'm Niplover1973." WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 12 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly "Good to meet you, Niplover. My name's Squirtypants47." And for some reason, when dealing with sexual matters, nobody bothers to proofread their work. A couple from Meridian has adopted the name "Candycookiesandcum." They describe themselves as "married and we want sexy girl." Not that there's anything wrong with that, but leaving out the article "a" before "sexy" makes them sound like cave people. ("Me want hump thing.") By the way, that's the extent of their profile--no pictures, no attempt to provide insight, just a couple who want sexy girl. Maybe they need to try bicupid.com. A girl from Blackfoot seems willing and even more careless with standard English, though far more expressive. First of all, her verbatim "tagline" is: "ArE YOUr PArENtS rEtArDeD? CUz DANg YOu SPeCiAl." That can be forgiven as stylistic illiteracy, but she continues: "Let's see, I am eihteen years young, basketbell && softball would be my favy sports, yellow && purple are my colors, the L.A. lakers would have to be my favorite team in all the NBA:] I live in a shity ass town known as "Blackfoot" the town where everybody knows everybody ... I have never got along with my parents because of my sexual orientation, YES i am Bi-Sexual && ii LOVE iiT =] ... all i ask of anyone is trust and honosty and its like everything evolves around nothing but sex these days. When i am twenty-one i am moving back to my home town with my oldest brother and hope to pusuite my dancing and ho pe to finish my last two semesters of school, && to all you bitches who THOUGHT you knew me ..... FUCKK OFF!!!!! =]" Cory McCune, a 42-year-old Arizona resident and Idaho native, said he found love on the Internet with a 28-year-old female--and then got divorced eight months later. "It was pretty stupid. I actually asked her to marry me before we even met," he said. "And actually, it wasn't really her fault. We loved each other, but I didn't know about all of her financial issues and stuff like that ... She had an ex who threatened my son, so that's probably what ended it more than the other stuff." The specificity of dating sites is proliferating so quickly that it's probably possible to find people who are into just about anything. There's a site devoted to "gay spanking." There's seniorpeoplemeet.com and blackpeoplemeet.com. Those two are WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M ADA M RO SEN LUN advertised on mainstream TV, but as media outlets become more fractured, it's only a matter of time before commercials for middleagedmongolianmidgetsmeet.com start popping up on the Paul Reubens Network. Witches and warlocks need love, too, and you can meet them at witchvox.com. They're not all hiding in covens and casting spells with bat wings. One guy announces, "I'm an Airman in the United States Military. And I'm a Witch. I'll say it a million times and nothing makes me more proud!" He's stationed at Mountain Home Air Force Base and goes by the name "Full Metal Pegasus." Go get him, ladies. Most people identify themselves as atheists or agnostics on these sites, but if you love Jesus as much as you love indiscriminate BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 13 D sex, you may want to visit libchrist.com, which purports to debunk myths of prescribed monogamy in the Bible. They advance a pretty good argument against the notion of biblical restrictions on sex outside of marriage. The argument: "Take out your Bible and show us where!" As mentioned earlier, if you're looking for love electronically, writing skills shouldn't be important to you. But if you like marginally erudite types and prefer to find out what they look like naked after meeting them, okcupid. com elicits sufficiently comprehensive information from a person to form a reasonable opinion. The site was recently purchased for $50 million by the irritatingly named Interactivecorp, which also owns match.com and chemistry.com. Members, for the most part, are better educated and less likely to write in text-speak than their slovenly counterparts on more explicit sites. But even there, a few sub-literates slip through the cracks. For instance, a Nampa woman--who is either 26 or 19, depending on which part of her profile you believe--writes, "I'm pritty, somewhat smart, and bi poller." In the things-she-couldn't-do-without section, she lists "my waight (cuz im thin)." You better contact her soon, though, because she's preparing to move to Oregon with her "feonce." (It's easy, after reading too many profiles like the example above, to forget all about romantic matters and just spend your time bemoaning the incompetence of public-school teachers. The counter-intuitive antidote to such a loss of focus is to read more of them-- because, as soon as you stumble across someone misspelling "I," it becomes fun again.) Robert McCarl, a sociology professor at Boise State, discussed the attendant ineloquence and deception of online dating. "The first thing that comes to mind is Marshall McLuhan's adage that the medium is the message," he said. "The medium of the Internet forces us to communicate in certain ways--it's like the Great Salt Lake, miles long but inches deep ... You can find a counterpart, probably pictures and videos and everything, but because it's digital, it's cold. It lacks the heat of face-to-face communication or even handwritten letters." While digital dating can bring people closer theoretically and sometimes physically, it may not work so well substantively. "The reach is tremendous, but the level of understanding can be easily distorted ... a 60-year-old sex freak can try to sound like a 16-year-old girl," McCarl said. "It gives us information but not necessarily insight." Incidentally, most online dating sites are free to join--they will ask you to upgrade in order to avoid the inevitable Ron Jeremysponsored ads--but you may lose more than money when you realize what your neighbors are doing behind the curtains. Polygamy seems to be popular these days, but many of the men wanting to break into the polygamy scene don't even have one wife yet--way to set your goals high, fellas. Most of the polygamy sites, however, tend to focus on helping females find big love. The forum comments are disproportionately written by women, or at least people who say they're women. On 4thefamily.us, an alleged woman writes, "I would welcome sister wives since we would all keep each other company in the afterlife." It sounds suspiciously like an argument a man would propose to a lonely fundamentalist, but you never know. One way to assemble multiple women without all of the legal hassle of anti-polygamy laws is to patronize realdoll.com. According to the site: "Since 1996, we have been using Hollywood special effects technology to produce the most realistic love doll in the world. Our dolls feature completely articulated skeletons which allow for anatomically correct positioning, an exclusive blend of the best silicone rubbers for an ultra flesh-like feel, and each doll is custom made to your specifications. We offer an extensive list of options, including 10 female body types and 16 interchangeable female faces." It's a good way to practice safe sex. As the site notes, each doll "receives a thorough acetone bath after fabrication." None of the dating sites provide that kind of assurance. They're kind of expensive--about $6,000--but for another $100, you can get one with extra pubic hair. Among the frequently asked questions, the most revealing is: "How much weight can the doll support?" The answer is 400 pounds. Instead of pubic hair, perhaps they should consider providing a doll that comes equipped with a bloodpressure monitor. Some of the sites even offer masturbation instruction. First of all, who needs instructions for something so self-explanatory? Furthermore, it seems to suggest a lack of confidence in the process. It's kind of like a car dealership offering classes on how to walk. If masturbation instruction and costprohibitive rubber mannequins derail your confidence in the Internet's capacity to sate lust with at least one other human being, the old-fashioned avenues still exist. Bars are fun, but Jagermeister can impede judgment even more than online witch sex. Apparently, couples have met at the gym, but who looks their best while waiting to weigh themselves and ringing out a sweat towel? People often get together at work, but then everybody at your job hates you and suspects some sort of conspiratorial collusion. You can always go to church, but ultimately, which is worse--fighting off a few pop-up ads for penis pumps or getting trapped in a corner with your dentist asking if you're ready to accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior? Real love, like real musical talent, develops after a long succession of years punctuated by grief and regret. Those ridiculously myopic moments of proclaiming love immediate and forever are, despite the surface allure, fleeting and usually doomed--just like that morbidly corpulent American Idol guy's career. Valentine's Day is equally fake and encourages similarly impetuous proclamations of devotion. Could anything be worse, aside from realizing the toilet is about to overflow or that your cat is about to barf, than discovering too late that the love of your life is horribly boring in bed? But even if you break up and love dies, sex remains--sometimes with the same person. It's eternal and deserves to be honored with its own holiday. Instead, we're stuck with Valentine's Day and its creepy mascot, Cupid. He hasn't achieved the popular prevalence and societal significance of Santa Claus--perhaps because he's a psychotic, naked, flying baby who shoots people with arrows and expects adoration instead of stitches, welts and condemnation. What an asshole. WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 14 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly BOISE ROCK SCHOOL the BEST PLACE for KIDS to ROCK W W W. B O I S E R O C K S C H O O L . C O M SPRING BREAK CAMP email info@boiserockschool for details march 29 - april 1 WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 15 BOISEvisit boiseweekly.com for more events WEEKLY PICKS Big blue buddha brings the boys to the yard. FRIDAY-SATURDAY FEB. 11-12 art VAGUE IV Although event organizers say Vague IV, or V4GUE, will be "a bit smaller in scope and hyperactivity than 2009's Vague III," the event still promises to showcase four bold Treasure Valley talents. On Friday, Feb. 11, from 5:30-9:30 p.m., and Saturday, Feb. 12, from noon-9 p.m., Vague IV will be held at Bryan A. Moore's Artists in Residence studio in BODO. The show will display pieces created by Moore, Tomas Montano, Bruce Maurey and Wren Van Bockel. The group is reuniting after a two-year hiatus, minus a few members, to bring Boise a two-day art exhibit. Vague IV will be open to the public with mediums ranging from paint to sculpture to prints. Maurey and Van Bockel will display their exhibit, "On the Land and Out to Sea," which was recently up at Flying M Coffeehouse and includes miniature wood renderings and paintings/sculptures of "anomalous creatures inhabiting bizarre landscapes." In addition, Tomas Montano will have part of his "Egyptian Gawds" series on display, which is currently in the window of the Egyptian Theatre. To bring both evenings to a close, local band Taxi del Taxi will team up with the Vague Collaborative to create "abstract aural landscapes," inviting everyone with "an ear for art to join in the sonic fun." Friday, Feb. 11, 5:30-9 p.m.; Saturday, Feb. 12, noon-9 p.m. Bryan A. Moore's AIR studio in the Mercantile Building, 404 S. Eighth St., Ste. 201. For more information, visit vaguecollab.com. Studs in studded belts. FRIDAY FEB. 11 music AVENGED SEVENFOLD Avenged Sevenfold is a younger, hotter version of Metallica, and since they've never been tangled in a lawsuit with a file sharing company, they've got less baggage. But less baggage isn't no baggage. The guys in Avenged Sevenfold--who bear stage monikers like M. Shadows, Zacky Vengeance, Synyster Gates and Johnny Christ--suffered the loss of friend and band mate James "The Rev" Sullivan. Sullivan died unexpectedly in 2009, just as the band was preparing to record its fifth album, Nightmare. As one would expect, this changed the tone, lyrics and mood of the album, which was released in 2010. Band vocalist M. Shadows told The Los Angeles Times, "When I was writing lyrics, I didn't really care what I was saying. I just cared about what I was feeling. And I think we made the album at such a vulnerable time that it shows." Nightmare contains intense ballads and songs that drip with the band's personal pain. In "Victim," Shadows sings, "Nothing lasts forever / for all good things it's true / I'd rather trade it all for somehow saving you." But the band has continued on and is now on the way to Boise for the Nightmare After Christmas tour. Critics of the album and the band charge that Avenged Sevenfold has traveled too far from its metalcore roots, while others say the band has merely evolved through loss, which was bound to influence their music. If you like your rock stars with a hint of tragedy, lots of grisly arm tats and black eyeliner, you can swoon at the boys in Avenged Sevenfold on Friday, Feb. 11, at the Taco Bell Arena. 6:30 p.m. doors; $39.75, floor tickets. Taco Bell Arena, 1910 University Drive, 208-4261900, idahotickets.com. FRIDAY FEB. 11 poetry BOISE'S BEST BAD POET Have you ever rhymed swiss chard with credit card? Or lard with Die Hard? Think you're more avant-garde than the Bard? Then you might be the perfect candidate to become Boise's Best Bad Poet. All weak wordsmiths and sub-par scribes are invited to Liquid on Friday, Feb. 11, to compete for "a shiny trophy," gift certificates and $100 cash. Bad poets will have 15 minutes to scribble out an original disaster piece on a given prompt. Finalists will then read their poems on stage with some emotionally stirring musical accompaniment. Legit poet Derrick Brown, founder of Write Bloody Publishing (see Arts, page 30), will be on hand as a guest judge, along with Sherry Japhet, host of Boise's Not Too Late Show, and cowboy poet Dan "Reride" Smith. Prizes will be given to first-, second- and third-place winners along with a special prize for crowd favorite. Tickets are $5 for bad poets and masochists, or free if you purchase a ticket to Brown's performance at the Rose Room on Saturday, Feb. 12. 7 p.m., $5 or FREE with Derrick Brown ticket. Liquid Lounge, 405 S. Eighth St., Ste. 110, 208-287-5379. TUESDAY FEB. 15 documentary WELCOME TO SHELBYVILLE Shelbyville, Tenn., and Boise have a lot in common. OK, maybe not at first glance. In fact, Boise feels like a big city in comparison--Shelbyville is home to a mere 20,000 residents, according to a 2009 census, while Boise boasts more than 200,000. But it's not WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 16 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly FIND Beardie babies in beanies. Put your heart on the line this Valentine's weekend. BEARD BEANIES Ski masks are creepy. Though they're unquestionably utilitarian, it's impossible to rock one without looking bank-robber-chic. Like glow sticks or trucker hats, the balaclava has been co-opted by a small, annoying minority and forever banished to badetsy.com/shop/taraduff associationland. Luckily, there's a noncreepy, all-natural ski mask: the beard. Chin gardens have been warming faces since the dawn of humanity. But sadly, not ever yone--children, those afflicted with alopecia universalis, most ladies--can grow a full beard. Until now. Etsy seller Taraduff has combined the practical warmth of the ski mask with the ZZ Top-itude of the beard, crafting hand-crocheted beanies with attached crocheted beards. Taraduff's hats come in a variety of colors and patterns, but the beards keep it classic in shades like light brown, dark brown, silver gray, charcoal gray, black, blond and ginger. The beardnies range in price from $45-$55 and are made from 100 percent acr ylic yarn. Or you can get a straight-up crocheted beard (no beanie) for $20. Though nothing can match the insulating warmth of real face fur, these faux-beards are bound to grow on you. --Tara Morgan SATURDAY FEB. 12 benefit HEART FOR HEAD START Show off your seed stockpile. SATURDAY FEB. 12 seeds YEAR OF IDAHO FOOD SEED SWAP Bartering might make you picture an overcrowded Southern California flea market or a humid Algerian bazaar, digging for dusty tchotchkes and terra-cotta pots. However, the Year of Idaho Food's Seed Swap and Story Telling event will bring bartering down to a much smaller, more manageable scale: seeds. During this mid-winter gathering organized by the Treasure Valley Food Coalition, community gardeners will tell stories about seeds, planting and the foods that follow. Master gardeners from University of Idaho will be available to answer your green-thumb queries, equipped with helpful gardening tips and valuable seed-starting ideas. But don't worry if you aren't an avid gardener, swapping seeds and stories is bound to get you in the gardening groove. With planting season almost upon us, those magical beans you've procrastinated planting due to the less-than-desirable beanstalk that might sprout up in your front yard, may very well be worth trading for acorn squash or rhododendron seeds. For more information visit nwfoodnews.com and click on Year of Idaho Food, then Calendar of Events. 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m., FREE. Boise Basque Center, 601 W. Grove St., 208-331-5097, nwfoodnews.com. With all the love and lust of Valentine's Day, our chocolate-hungry culture sometimes forgets what is truly important. No matter what Hallmark leads you to believe, love isn't about child-sized, singing greeting cards or fiber-optic light-up roses or plush Teddy bears holding a "shit bitch, you is fine" silky heart. This Valentine's weekend, show your sweetie your philanthropic side by giving back to people in your community at the Friends of Children and Families' inaugural Valentine's gala, Hearts for Head Start. Friends of Children and Families is celebrating 25 years of providing educational, family, food and mental-disability services to those in need in the Treasure Valley. The event at the Stueckle Sky Center will kick off with a silent auction featuring donated items including themed baskets, children's artwork, quilts and furniture. After the silent auction, couples can settle in for dinner at 7 p.m., then live music and dancing from '60s and '70s cover band The 45s beginning at 9 p.m. This year, spend your money on a romantic dinner that makes a difference. Hearts for Head Start is a smart way to show the one you heart that you care about your community. 6 p.m., $50 per person, Stueckle Sky Center. For tickets, call Friends of Children and Families at 208-344-9187 or visit focaf.org. the numbers that matter, it's the people. And--as seen in the trailer for the documentary Welcome to Shelbyville--it's clear that the people of Shelbyville and Boise have both seen and felt the effects of demographic change. Shelbyville is Boise in microcosm. Like Boise, a large percentage of Shelbyville's population is white. Like Boise, Shelbyville has seen an influx of immigrants and refugees. This documentar y, part of Boise State's Diverse Perspectives Film Series, explores the dynamics that arise between these groups in small town, post9/11 America. The documentary follows locals as they ask questions about the newcomers--questions that range from the curious: "Why does she dress that way?" to the more racially loaded: "Are they going to blow us up?" Those who participated in the documentary are candid about their fears, such as the economy, religion and the force of a changing city. All these issues culminate with the election of President Barack Obama--a time when the topic of race was inescapable. Fundamentally, the film tries to show us how we understand those who are different from us. 5:30-7 p.m., FREE. Boise State Student Union Building, Hatch A Ballroom. For more information, call 208426-5950. SU B M I T an event by e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.com. Listings are due by noon the Thursday before publication. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 17 ROCKS NEW GEAR AND SO DOES LOVE 20% OFF SNOWBOARDS FROM Dinosours Will Die, Step Child, Nitro, Arbor, DC, K2 Discounts on jackets, pants, goggles, helmets & long undies. DON'T FORGET THE STANLEY BIG AIR COMPETITION FEB 13TH. 1021 Broadway Ave Boise ID 208 385-9300 8 DAYS OUT WEDNESDAY FEB. 9 On Stage LEGALLY BLONDE-- Broadway musical about stylish sorority girl Elle Woods, who discovers that being true to oneself never goes out of style. 7:30 p.m. $28-$50.50. Morrison Center for the Performing Arts, 2201 Cesar Chavez Lane, Boise, 208-4261609, mc.boisestate.edu. NORWAY--Idaho native Samuel D. Hunter wrote this play about two high school friends and their ultimate relationship and how it affected those around them. This is the first of Hunter's plays to be produced in his home state. See review at boiseweekly. com. 8 p.m. $14-$20. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208-331-9224, bctheater.org. LEAP TROUPE--Dance class for kids ages 9 to 12 years old. They will learn new moves and be accompanied by live music. 6-7 p.m. $150 for entire session. Trey McIntyre Project headquarters, 775 Fulton St., Boise, 877-8672320, treymcintyre.com. MR. PATRICK'S WORKSHOP-- Young designers, inventors and engineers can bring their creations to life with legos. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Ada Community Library, 10664 W. Victory Road, Boise, 208-362-0181, adalib.org. BEDSIDE MANNERS-- Stage Coach Theatre presents this farce about one crazy spring night in the country. Visit stagecoachtheatre. com or call 208-342-2000 for tickets and info. 7:30 p.m. $12-$15. Idaho Outdoor Association Grange Hall, corner of Brazil and Wright streets, Boise. CHICKS N' GIGGLES--Interactive improv comedy includes skits, stand-up routines and more. 7:30 p.m. $7. Bull's Head Station, 1441 N. Eagle Road, Meridian, 208-855-5858. NORWAY--See Wednesday. 8 p.m. $14-$20. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208-331-9224, bctheater. org. STEEL MAGNOLIAS-- Several women share their lives in the setting of a Southern beauty parlor. Purchase tickets at ticketturtle. com. Call 208-385-0021 for more info. 7 p.m. $15-$39. Knock `Em Dead Dinner Theatre, 415 E. Parkcenter Blvd., 208-385-0021, kedproductions.org. THURSDAY FEB. 10 On Stage AX OF MURDER--The ArtsWest drama department presents this comical murder mystery. 7 p.m. $8-$10. ArtsWest School, 3300 W. State St., Eagle, artswestschool.org. Workshops & Classes WATERCOLOR PAINTING-- Bob Fagan teaches watercolor techniques. Must be at least 18 years old. Call 208-870-2568 for more info. 3:30-5:30 p.m. $40 for four classes, plus cost of supplies. Hobby Lobby, 3547 N. Eagle Road, Meridian, 208-8554798, hobbylobby.com. NOISE/CD REVIEW BONDED BY BLOOD: EXILED TO EARTH Taking the name of your band from one of the most highly regarded thrash masterpieces ever, Exodus' debut chainsaw manifesto Bonded By Blood, does fester a certain level of expectation. Well, consider expectations drawn, quartered and disemboweled. Slaying from Pomona, Calif., Bonded By Blood, though not classic Anthrax or Overkill (and what is?), still shred an awesome menace. There has been a primeval resurgence in the last few years with the classic thrash wail. Bands like Toxic Holocaust, Hexen and Municipal Waste are gnashing along endless tours, as the bloodlust of ruthless headbangers remains insatiable. And to those hordes, Exiled to Earth (Earache), BBB's second offering, will not disappoint. A conceptual album about a hostile extraterrestrial invasion involving genetic crossbreeding 600 years in the future sounds like a recipe for disastrous, pretentious prog-rock, but Exiled to Earth has the right ingredients to avoid that pitfall. The track "600 A.B. (After the Bomb)" opens with a traditional clean guitar intro before detonating into nails and shrapnel. Through 40-plus vertebrae-shattering minutes, the attack is relentless. "PrototypeDeath Machine," "Prison Planet," "Genetic Encryption" and "Blood Spilled Offerings" are all new-thrash classics. Comprised of singer Jose Barrales--shrieking like an alien is bursting through his chest--drummer Carlos Regalado in full, crazed Dave Lombardo mode, bassist Jerry Garcia (his real name) and guitar oracles Juan Juarez and Alex Lee, Bonded By Blood are primed for new-thrash domination. If Exiled to Earth is any indication, these Bay Area maniacs are ready to take over the world. --Justin B. Peterson WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M Literature BOISE BARDS OPEN MIC-- Bring your poetry to read or listen to others read theirs. 2 p.m. FREE. Hyde Park Books, 1507 N. 13th St., Boise, 208-429-8220, hydeparkbookstore.com. BOISE NOVEL ORCHARD--Writers meet to edit, critique and encourage each other. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Rediscovered Bookshop, 180 N. Eighth St., Boise, 208376-4229, rdbooks.org. DROP-IN WRITING WORKSHOP--Authors and teachers Malia Collins and Adrian Kien offer writers of all levels a chance to create and share work in a friendly, informal atmosphere. 6:30-8 p.m. FREE. The Cabin, 801 S. Capitol Blvd., Boise, 208331-8000, thecabinidaho.org. Citizen BOISE BICYCLE PROJECT VOLUNTEER NIGHT--Volunteers donate their time to help build and repair bicycles for those in need. 6-8 p.m. Boise Bicycle Project, 1027 Lusk St., Boise, 208-429-6520, boisebicycleproject.org. Kids & Teens DIDGERIDOOS AND STORYTELLING CLASS--Children in fourth through eighth grades will explore the Aboriginal culture and create their own Didgeridoos. E-mail will.bogdanoff@ ymcatvidaho.org to register. 4:15-5:15 p.m. $15 plus registration fee. Sage International School, 457 E. Parkcenter Blvd., Boise, 208-343-7243, sageinternationalschool.org. 18 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 19 8 DAYS OUT Concerts VOCAL JAZZ CONCERT--Annual concert featuring guest artist Groove For Thought. 7:30-8:30 p.m. $5. Student Union Jordan Ballroom, Boise State University, Boise, 208-426-1000, boisestate.edu. PAELLA AND TAPAS CLASS--Learn how to make the classic Basque dishes. Class fills up quickly, so call to reserve your spot. 6 p.m. $30. Basque Market, 608 W. Grove St., Boise, 208-433-1208, thebasquemarket.com. VICTORY GARDEN SERIES--Series of six classes designed to help you prepare to grow your own produce. Classes meet on Thursday evenings at 6:30 p.m. through March 17. Visit nwfoodnews.com for more info and to register. 6:30-9:30 p.m. $45. Grace Episcopal Church, 411 10th Ave. S., Nampa, 208-466-0782. Workshops & Classes SUSTAINABLE ENERGY, SUSTAINABLE HOMES-- Learn to use your utility bills to determine how efficient your home is and find ways to make it more efficient. Co-sponsored by Green Remodeling, renewable Energy Solutions and Idaho Power. 7 p.m. $10, $50 for eight-month series. Integrated Design Lab, 108 N. Sixth St., Boise, 208-429-0220, idlboise. com. Literature FANTASTIC WORLDS BOOK CLUB--Fans of science fiction or fantasy are welcome to join others in reading selections from the genre. 6:30-8 p.m. FREE Rediscovered Bookshop, 180 N. Eighth St., Boise, 208-376-4229, rdbooks.org. POETRY SLAM AND READING--Read your own poetry or cheer for others during this free event. Must be 16 yeas old to participate. Winners will be published in the Idaho Librarian and will receive prizes. 5-7 p.m. FREE. Nampa Public Library, 101 11th Ave. S., Nampa, 208-468-5824, nampalibrary.org. Food & Drink BEER AND WINE TASTINGS--Sample a rotating selection of European wines and beers. See website for more info. 5-8 p.m. $10. Tres Bonne Cuisine, 6555 W. Overland Road, Boise, 208-658-1364, tresbonnescuisine.com. Talks & Lectures BIGFOOT EXPERT LECTURE--Jeffrey Meldrum, author of Sasquatch: Legend Meets Science, will speak about the mythological creature in conjunction with the Sun Valley Center for the Arts' "Creatures" exhibit. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Sun Valley Center for the Arts, 191 Fifth St. E., Ketchum, 208-726-9491, sunvalleycenter.org. Sports & Fitness TRICYCLE RACES--The disclaimer at the beginning of Jackass was about exactly this sort of thing, which is why it's awesome. 10 p.m. FREE. The Lobby, 760 W. Main St., Boise, 208-991-2183, thelobbyboise.com. Citizen ANNUAL AFTERNOON TEA--Join the Syringa House girls for high tea. Proceeds to benefit the Northwest Children's Home. RSVP by e-mailing firstname.lastname@example.com. 4 p.m. $25. Northwest Children's Home: Syringa House, 1306 E. Karcher Road, Nampa, 208-467-5223, northwestchildrenshome.org. Odds & Ends GOLDFISH RACING--Goldfish are placed in a raingutter, and it's your job to urge them on toward the other end by blowing through a straw. Winner gets a big effin' bar tab and their fish. 10 p.m. FREE. Mack and Charlie's, 507 W. Main St., Boise, 208-830-9977, mackandcharlies. com. LAST CALL TRIVIA--Prove you know more random stuff than the guy sitting next to you and win prizes. 8 p.m. FREE. Liquid, 405 S. Eighth St., Boise, 208287-5379, liquidboise.com. POKER--Play for fun and prizes. 7 p.m. FREE. The Buffalo Club, 10206 W. Fairview Ave., Boise, 208321-1811. FRIDAY FEB. 11 On Stage AX OF MURDER--See Thursday. 7 p.m. $8-$10. ArtsWest School, 3300 W. State St., Eagle, artswestschool.org. BEDSIDE MANNERS--See Thursday. 8:15 p.m. $12-$15. Idaho Outdoor Assn. Grange Hall, corner of Brazil and Wright streets, Boise. NORWAY--See Wednesday. 8 p.m. $14-$20. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208331-9224, bctheater.org. PIRATES OF PENZANCE GOES WEST--The Starlight Mountain Theatre puts its own spin on the classic opera. Call 208-462-5523 or visit starlightmt.org for more info. 7:30 p.m. $10-$22. Limelight, 3575 E. Copper Point Way, Meridian, 208-898-9425. PITA PUN--The Prairie Dog players put a new spin on the childhood classic. 7:15 p.m. $8-$13. Prairie Dog Playhouse, 3820 Cassia St., Boise, 208-3367383, pdplayhouse.com. 20 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 8 DAYS OUT STEEL MAGNOLIAS-- See Thursday. 6:15 p.m. $15-$39. Knock `Em Dead Dinner Theatre, 415 E. Parkcenter Blvd., 208-385-0021, kedproductions.org. TIME MACHINE--The gang from Red Light Variety Show travels through time with hoola hoop, burlesque, aerial, acrobatics, belly dance and pole dance performances. $8 adv., $10 door. Visual Arts Collective, 3638 Osage St., Garden City, 208-424-8297, visualartscollective.com. Literature BOISE'S BEST BAD POET--This is the contest in which passion might get you further than actual talent. If you're longing to share your innermost thoughts or just some really bad poetry, step up to the mic. Contestants will be judged by nationally known poet Derrick Brown and winners will win cash and other prizes. See Picks Page 17. 7 p.m. $5. Liquid, 405 S. Eighth St., Boise, 208-287-5379, liquidboise.com. MUSIC AND MOVEMENT-- Loud, silly fun that focuses on rhythm, coordination and other skills. All ages welcome. 10:30 a.m. Ada Community Library, 10664 W. Victory Road, Boise, 208-362-0181, adalib.org. Odds & Ends BOISE ASTRONOMICAL SOCIETY--Learn how to use a telescope to view the sky during this month's meeting. See website for more info. FREE. Discovery Center of Idaho, 131 Myrtle St., Boise, 208-3439895, boiseastro.org. LEARN ABOUT CO-HOUSING-- An introductory presentation on what co-housing is and how Boise can move forward with its own community. For more information contact Dan Walters at 208-424-0409 or danchavous@ msn.com. 7-8:30 p.m., $10 donation, First Congregational United Church of Christ, 2201 W. Woodlawn Ave. 208-344-5731. 300 firstname.lastname@example.com 400 Concerts PEABODY TRIO--The resident faculty ensemble of the Peabody Conservatory in Baltimore will perform selections from Mendelssohn and Schubert as part of the Boise Chamber Music Series. 7:30 p.m. $20-$25. Morrison Center Recital Hall, 2201 Cesar Chavez Lane, Boise State campus, Boise, 208-426-1609. Citizen SCARVING ARTISTS FUNDRAISER--Featuring fine art and wine from around the region, and hors d'oeuvres courtesy of Eighteen One. Proceeds from the evening will benefit the Idaho Center for Assistive Technology. 6 p.m. $45. Eagle Hills Golf Course, 605 N. Edgewood Lane, Eagle, 208-939-0402. Art VAGUE IV--Tomas Montano and Bryan A. Moore along with other local artists have teamed up to present the Vague Collaborative once again. 5:30-9 p.m. FREE. 404 S. Eighth St., Mercantile Building, Boise, 208-338-5212, 8thstreetmarketplace.com. Kids & Teens FAMILY GAME NIGHT--Bring the family to watch Despicable Me, play games and grub on snacks. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Ada Community Library, 10664 W. Victory Road, Boise, 208-3620181, adalib.org. SATURDAY FEB. 12 Festivals & Events FATHER/DAUGHTER WINTER BALL--Dress up and dance the night away. The ball is a fundraiser for the Eagle Performing Arts Center. Ticket prices include a portrait package and dessert. 7-9:30 p.m. $85 per couple, $15 each additional daughter. Eagle Performing Arts Center, 1125 E. State St., Eagle, 208-338-4633, epacdance.com. THE MEPHAM GROUP | SUDOKU On Stage AX OF MURDER--See Thursday. 7 p.m. $8-$10. ArtsWest School, 3300 W. State St., Eagle, artswestschool.org. BEDSIDE MANNERS-- See Thursday. 8:15 p.m. $12-$15. Idaho Outdoor Assn. Grange Hall, corner of Brazil and Wright streets, Boise. DERRICK BROWN-- Bestselling poet and spoken word performer, known for his sharp wit, will take the stage. Afterward he will answer questions and sign books. See story on Page 30. Purchase tickets at brownpapertickets.com. 8 p.m. $15 each, $80 for a reserved table for eight people. Rose Room, 718 W. Idaho St., 208-381-0483, parklaneco.com/roseroom. HER TONGUE--The Pix Players present this play about a woman's wish to find true love but her constant chattering gets in the way. Proceeds benefit the restoration of the Pix Theatre. E-mail Debra at debra_lindner@ yahoo.com for more info. 4:30 p.m. $10-$25. Pix Theatre, 401 Morning Sun Drive, Nampa, thepixtheatre.com. NORWAY--See Wednesday. 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. $14-$20. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208-331-9224, bctheater.org. PIRATES OF PENZANCE GOES WEST--See Friday. 7:30 p.m. $10-$22. Limelight, 3575 E. Copper Point Way, Meridian, 208898-9425. | EASY | MEDIUM | HARD | PROFESSIONAL | Complete the grid so each row, column and 3-by-3 box (in bold borders) contains every digit 1 to 9. For strategies on how to solve Sudoku, visit www.sudoku.org.uk. Go to www.boiseweekly.com and look under odds and ends for the answers to this week's puzzle. And don't think of it as cheating. Think of it more as simply double-checking your answers. � 2009 Mepham Group. Distributed by Tribune Media Services. All rights reserved. LAST WEEK'S ANSWERS WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 21 8 DAYS OUT PITA PUN--See Friday. 7:15 p.m. $8-$13. Prairie Dog Playhouse, 3820 Cassia St., Boise, 208-336-7383, pdplayhouse. com. STEEL MAGNOLIAS-- See Thursday. 6:15 p.m. $15-$39. Knock `Em Dead Dinner Theatre, 415 E. Parkcenter Blvd., Boise, 208-385-0021, kedproductions. org. VALENTINE'S COMEDY SHOW--Featuring comics Viki Barbolak, Troy Baxley and Boise's own Matt Bragg. The evening also includes dinner, dancing and unlimited champagne. Call 208-658-1126 for reservations. 8 p.m. $40. Powerhouse Event Center, 621 S. 17th St., Boise, 208-433-0197, powerhouseevent.com. WHAT'S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT?--The Imperial Sovereign Gem Court of Idaho's performance to benefit the Jerry Swett fund. 9 p.m. $5. Neurolux, 111 N. 11th St., Boise, 208-3430886, neurolux.com. VINTAGE SWING DANCE--Instructions on classic Lindy Hop moves. All ages. No partner required. 8 p.m. $5. Heirloom Dance Studio, 765 Idaho St., Boise, 208-871-6352, heirloomdancestudio.com. Kids & Teens DUCK STAMP ART DAY--Kids can show off their artistic skills by creating artwork for a duckthemed stamp. Also learn about wintering waterfowl and go on a bird walk. 1-3 p.m. FREE. Deer Flat National Wildlife Refuge Visitor's Center, 13751 Upper Embankment Road, Nampa, 208467-9278, fws.gov/deerflat. TRICA RE-ART: CULINARY ARTS--Kids ages 5 to 10 years old will learn how to create their own artfully tasty snack. FREE. Two locations: 1 p.m., Library at Collister, 4724 W. State St., Boise, 208-562-4995, and 3 p.m., Library at Cole and Ustick, 7557 W. Ustick Road, 208-5706900, boisepubliclibrary.com. Green SEED SWAP--Bring seeds from your favorite vegetables, plants and flowers to swap and share with other gardening enthusiasts. You will have the opportunity to share your seed-related stories between 10:30 a.m. and noon. See Picks, Page 16. For more info contact Beth at 208-6976208. 9:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. FREE. Basque Center, 601 W. Grove St., 208-331-5097 or 208342-9983, basquecenter.com. Animals & Pets SNIP VALENTINE GLAM PHOTOS--Dress your pet and get its picture taken. You will have the opportunity to purchase the professional pics online after the event, and proceeds help raise funds for SNIPs low-cost clinic opening later this year. Noon-4 p.m. FREE. H3 Pet Foods, 1801 West Cherry Lane, Meridian. Citizen HEART FOR HEAD START--An evening of dinner, dancing and silent and live auctions to benefit the Head Start program. See Picks, Page 16. Visit focaf.org for more info. 6 p.m. $50. Stueckle Sky Center, Boise State football stadium. LEGISLATIVE UPDATE--Canyon County representatives and senators will speak about matters being discussed at the Statehouse. 10 a.m. FREE. Nampa City Hall, 411 Third St. S., Nampa. MIRACLE ON FOURTH STREET--Featuring comedian Matt Bryngelson, music with Travis McDaniel, the Boise and Nampa Police Bagpipers and more to benefit officers injured in the line of duty. 7 p.m. $5. Nampa Civic Center, 311 Third St. S., Nampa, 208-468-5555, nampaciviccenter.com. Food & Drink CHILI COOK OFF--Enjoy chili and family fun during this 25th annual chili cook-off in Idaho City. 8:30 a.m. $20 entry fee, $5 people's choice, FREE spectator. Idaho City Visitor's Center, 100 S. Main St., Idaho City, 208-3926040, idahocitychamber.com. SUNDAY FEB. 13 On Stage AX OF MURDER--See Thursday. 7 p.m. $8-$10. ArtsWest School, 3300 W. State St., Eagle, artswestschool.org. HER TONGUE--See Saturday. 4:30 p.m. $10-$25. Pix Theatre, 401 Morning Sun Drive, Nampa, thepixtheatre.com. Art VAGUE 4--See Friday. Noon-9 p.m. FREE. 404 S. Eighth St, Mercantile Building, Boise, 208-338-5212, 8thstreetmarketplace.com. Workshops & Classes CALORIMETRY SHORT ROW KNITTING CLASS--Learn how to knit short rows from instructor Melissa Transtrum. You must bring a set of U.S. size 7 or 8 needles and already know how to knit and purl. 10 a.m.-noon. $35. Puffy Mondaes, 200 12th Ave. S., Nampa, 208-407-3359, puffymondaes.com. LEARN ABOUT CO-HOUSING-- A two-day workshop on what co-housing is and how Boise can move forward with its own community. Registration required. For more information contact Dan Walters at 208-424-0409 or email@example.com. LOTUS LANTERN MAKING--Learn how to make these Tibetan lanterns, part of a month-long celebration of Tibetan culture. 3-5 p.m. FREE, donations accepted. Shangri-La Tea Room, 1800 W. Overland Road, Boise, 208-424-0273, shangri-la-tea.com. MUD AND FLOOD PROGRAM-- Bring the whole family to learn about geologic hazards in the Boise Foothills. Design and build your own dam, create a landslide and participate in other activities, including a hike to the pond and back. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. FREE with price of admission. Foothills Learning Center, 3188 Sunset Peak Road, 208-514-3755, cityofboise.org/parks/foothills. Skeleton Blues by Connor Coughlin was the 1st place winner in the 9th Annual Boise Weekly Bad Cartoon Contest. 22 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 8 DAYS OUT Concerts AMERICAN PIANO DUO--Concert featuring Del Parkinson and Jeffrey Shumway. 4-6 p.m. $3-$5, FREE for Boise State students and faculty. Morrison Center Recital Hall, 2201 Cesar Chavez Lane, Boise State campus, Boise, 208-426-1609. SECOND SUNDAY SOUNDS AT SIX--Violinist Jennifer Dunn and pianist Robyn Wells will perform works by Beethoven, Brahms, Prokofiev, Rachmaninoff and more during this performance titled "Sounds of Spring." 6 p.m. FREE, donations accepted. McCall Community Congregational Church, 901 First St., McCall, 208-634-5430. THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID SUNDAYS--Free pool tournament and karaoke. What better way to spend a Sunday? Noon-6 p.m. Quarter Barrel, 4902 W. Chinden Blvd., Garden City, 208-322-3430. INSERT FOOT THEATRE--Local improv comedy. 8 p.m. $5. Heirloom Dance Studio, 765 Idaho St., Boise, 208-871-6352, heirloomdancestudio.com. PIRATES OF PENZANCE GOES WEST--See Friday. 7 p.m. $10$22. Limelight, 3575 E. Copper Point Way, Meridian, 208-8989425. QUESTIONS FOR MY MOTHER--Andrea Caban wrote and performs this piece as part of Boise Contemporary Theatre's New Works Reading Series. 7 p.m. $12. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208-331-9224, bctheater.org. Kids & Teens MINI MASTERS ART CLASS-- Focuses on a different technique every week. 4 p.m. FREE. Garden City Library, 6015 Glenwood St., 208-472-2940, gardencity. lili.org. MARVELOUS MASK-MAKING CLASS--Children will create masks from various cultures. 4:15-5:15 p.m. $15 plus registration fee. Sage International School, 457 E. Parkcenter Blvd., Boise, 208-343-7243, sageinternationalschool.org. Odds & Ends BEER PONG--Play for prizes and bar tabs while drinking $5 pitchers. 9 p.m. FREE. Shorty's Saloon, 5467 Glenwood, Garden City, 208-322-6699. PIONEER TOASTMASTERS-- Participants are invited to work on their public speaking. Guests and new members are welcome. For info, e-mail firstname.lastname@example.com. 6-7:30 p.m. FREE, 208-559-4434. Perkins, 300 Broadway Ave. Animals & Pets SNIP SWEETHEART BLACK DOG WALK--Bring your dog to walk to help raise awareness of the plight of black cats and dogs in shelters. There will be a free raffle, tips and training. Sponsored by Spay Neuter Idaho Pets. Noon. FREE. The Ram, 709 E. Park Blvd., Boise, 208-3452929, theram.com. EYESPY Real Dialogue from the naked city Citizen CLEAN ENERGY LOBBY DAY-- Show support for the 20/20 Vision sustainable energy future legislation. 9 a.m.-Noon. FREE. Boise Capitol Building, 700 W. Jefferson, Boise. NETWORKING JOB CLUB-- Networking Job Club meets to offer leads, tips, insights and ideas with focus on career assessment, finding the hidden job market, networking, Internet success, developing a successful resume and interview coaching. Facilitator and guest speakers. 10:30-11:30 a.m. FREE. Foothills Christian Church, 9655 W. State St., Boise, 208-853-0011. Concerts Kids & Teens TRICA RE-ART: CULINARY ARTS--See Saturday. FREE at two locations: 3 p.m., Library at Hillcrest, 5246 W. Overland Road, Boise, 208-562-4996, and 1 p.m., Boise Public Library, 715 S. Capitol Blvd., Boise, 208-3844200, boisepubliclibrary.org. MONDAY FEB. 14 On Stage AX OF MURDER--See Thursday. 7 p.m. $8-$10. Arts West School, 3300 W. State St., Eagle, artswestschool.org. HER TONGUE--See Saturday. 7 p.m. $25, includes dinner. Pix Theatre, 401 Morning Sun Drive, Nampa, thepixtheatre.com. GERSHON WACHTEL CONCERT--The piano virtuoso from Toronto will perform a repertoire of classical Jewish and Broadway music. 7:30 p.m. $12-$18. Esther Simplot Center for the Performing Arts, 516 S. Ninth St., Boise, 208-345-9116. Literature CLASSICS YOU FORGOT TO READ--Discussion of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. 6:30-8 p.m. FREE. Rediscovered Bookshop, 180 N. Eighth St., Boise, 208376-4229, rdbooks.org. Odds & Ends LAST CALL TRIVIA--Followed by Anarchist Karaoke. 8 p.m. FREE. Liquid, 405 S. Eighth St., Boise, 208-287-5379, liquidboise.com. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 23 8 DAys oUT TUesDAy feb. 15 Festivals & Events China night--Celebrate the Chinese New Year with an evening of food and drinks, traditional songs and dance, kung-fu exhibitions and more. 6:30 p.m. $2-$3. Student Union Jordan Ballroom, Boise State, Boise, 208-426-1000, boisestate.edu. the SCreenwriterS group--Learn and practice pitching your screenplay or project. for more information, e-mail firstname.lastname@example.com. 6:30 p.m. Idaho Pizza Company, 405 E. Fairview Ave, Meridian, 208-375-4100, idahopizzacompany.com. Citizen monthly meeting of veteranS for peaCe--Open to all who are interested. 7-9 p.m. FREE. First Congregational United Church of Christ, 2201 Woodlawn Ave., 208-344-5731 Comedy night--Test out your routine during open mic night. 8:30 p.m. FREE. Quarter Barrel, 4902 W. Chinden Blvd., Garden City, 208-322-3430. laSt Call trivia--Know lots of random stuff? Prove it, and win stuff. 8 p.m. FREE. Buffalo Wild Wings, 3223 E. Louise Dr., Meridian, 208-288-5485, buffalowildwings.com. laSt Call trivia--Show off how many random tidbits of info you know during trivia and then how well you sing with Anarchist Karaoke. 8 p.m. FREE. Liquid, 405 S. Eighth St., Boise, 208287-5379, liquidboise.com. paBSt Bingo night--Play bingo for PbR, swag and other random stuff found at secondhand stores. 7 p.m. FREE. Donnie Mac's Trailer Park Cuisine, 1515 W. Grove St., Boise, 208384-9008, donniemacgrub.com. Odds & Ends Beer pong tourney--eight tables set up for play, $4 pitchers and a cash prize. 10 p.m. FREE. Fatty's, 800 W. Idaho St., Ste. 200, Boise, 208-514-2531, drinkfattys.com. Booze ClueS--Trivia and prizes with the one and only e.J. Pettinger. 9 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's, 513 W. Main St., Boise, 208-345-6344. On Stage the perfeCt gentlemen--A quartet that lends their vocal stylings to a variety of music. Call 208-459-3405 or visit caldwellfinearts.org for more info. 7:30 p.m. $8-$14. Jewett Auditorium, The College of Idaho, 2112 E. Cleveland Blvd., Caldwell, 208-459-3405 or 208454-1376, caldwellfinearts.org. review/ShOw Workshops & Classes italian: level one--full immersion language class taught by a native speaker. Call for more info. 12:30-1:30 p.m. $140 per month. CR Languages, 720 West Idaho St., Ste. 32, Boise, 208-867-8011, crlanguages.com. what'S Blooming?--Catch a glimpse of spring by learning how to spot which plants are already starting to bloom. 6:30 p.m. $10 Idaho Botanical Garden member, $15 nonmember. Idaho Botanical Garden, 2355 N. Penitentiary Road, Boise, 208-343-8649, idahobotanicalgarden.org. The GeT Up kiDs, Feb. 3, kFch Something was off as I exited the sparsely populated Get Up Kids show at the Knitting factory on feb. 3. while the throat tingle was familiar--from screaming every word to songs like "Red Letter Day," "Action and Action" and "Close to home"-- something else had changed since the last time I saw the emo pioneers more than a decade ago: I wasn't drenched in sweat. Glancing around at the equally dry, mid-to-late 20-something crowd, I realized our mosh pit days are long gone. where a Get Up Kids show in the early 2000s ended with bruised toes, matted hair and a warm glow of exhausted elation, this time it wrapped up with polite conversation and cold beers. Though both the audience and the band had grown up since TGUK's Something to Write Home About heyday, the show still totally rocked. The set was sprinkled with songs from the band's new synthheavy fifth album, There Are Rules--and lead singer Matthew Pryor's self-deprecating stage banter--but the crowd was far more animated when they played tracks from their earlier albums. To my surprise, the band played a number of classics--like "Shorty" and "Stay Gold, Ponyboy"--off their more punk-influenced first release, Four Minute Mile. Though Pryor's nasally vocals were more subdued than they were 15 years ago, he never phoned it in, cocking his head back to belt out lines like, "I've made up my mind / to lie would be to compromise" from "Coming Clean." The band wrapped up their set with the hazy "walking on a wire," off their alt-country-influenced third album On a Wire, and then returned for an encore that included fan favorites "Ten Minutes" and "holiday." Though I wasn't drenched in sweat this time around, the elation lingered as I turned to say goodnight, not goodbye. --Tara Morgan www. b o i s e we e kly. c o m Talks & Lectures freedom from allergieS ClaSS--Doctor emily Penny will speak on non-invasive treatments for identifying and treating allergies with a more natural approach. Register online at boiselearns.org. 7-8 p.m. $7.50. West Junior High School, 711 N. Curtis Rd., Boise, 208-8546450, boiseschools.org. Kids & Teens pajama Story time and Craft--Kids of all ages can wear their PJs, listen to stories and make craft projects. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Ada Community Library, 10664 W. Victory Road, 208-362-0181, adalib.org. ShortBread Story time-- bring the kids down to listen to Shark vs. Train by Chris barton. 7-8 p.m. FREE. Rediscovered Bookshop, 180 N. Eighth St., 208-376-4229, rdbooks.org. 24 | february 9�15, 2011 | boiseweekly 8 DAYS OUT POKER--See Thursday. 7 p.m. FREE. The Buffalo Club, 10206 W. Fairview Ave., Boise, 208-3211811. POKER NIGHT--Prizes for first and second places. 6:30 and 9 p.m. Montego Bay, 3000 N. Lakeharbor Lane, Boise, 208-853-5070, montegobayidaho.com. Animals & Pets BACKYARD POULTRY CLASS--Three-week class designed to enlighten new chicken owners--or those considering getting some--about raising them in your backyard. Call Stephanie at 208-459-6003 for more info. 6-9 p.m. $20 two people. University of Idaho Canyon County Extension Office, 501 Main St., Caldwell. Calls to Artists BOISE WEEKLY COVER ART SUBMISSIONS--Each week's cover of Boise Weekly is a piece of work from a local artist. BW pays $150 for published covers. One stipulation of publication is that the piece be donated to BW's annual charity art auction in November. Proceeds from the auction are reinvested in the local arts community through a series of private grants for which all artists are eligible to apply. To submit your artwork for BW's cover, bring it to BWHQ at 523 Broad St. All mediums are accepted. Thirty days from your submission date, your work will be ready for pick up if it's not chosen to be featured on the cover. For more information contact Art Director Leila Ramella-Rader at email@example.com or 208-344-2055. Boise Weekly, 523 Broad St., Boise, 208-344-2055, boiseweekly.com. BOISE WEEKLY COVER AUCTION GRANT--Because the left hand (advertising) and the right hand (editorial) don't always talk to each other at BW, we screwed up and printed two different deadlines for the Cover Auction grant. So, good news procrastinators: you have an extension. BW has $16,000 to give to local artists. Apply before Friday, Feb. 11, 5 p.m. Visit Cobweb for details on how to apply, or call Office Manager Shea Sutton at 208-344-2055. WEDNESDAY FEB. 16 On Stage DEAD MAN'S CELL PHONE--Compelled to answer a dead man's cell phone, Jean suddenly finds herself entangled with his family and friends. Written by Sarah Ruhl and directed by Denise Simone. 7 p.m. $10-$28. Liberty Theatre, 110 N. Main St., Hailey, 208-578-9122, companyoffools.org. NORWAY--See Wednesday. 8 p.m. $14-$20. Boise Contemporary Theater, 854 Fulton St., Boise, 208331-9224, bctheater.org. turning you on since 1994 Food & Drink DRINKING LIBERALLY--A group of left-leaning individuals gather to talk politics, share ideas and inspire change. The event is a project of Living Liberally, an organization that is all about fostering progressive communities through social networks and events. 7 p.m. drinkingliberally.org. Solid, 405 S. Eighth St., Boise, 208-345-6620. IDAHO MEDIA PROFESSIONALS LUNCH--Speakers this month will be writer/director Seth Randall and producer Louise Luster. They will present their documentary Sergeant Paine. 11 a.m.-1 p.m. FREE. Smoky Mountain Pizza and Pasta, 415 E. Parkcenter Blvd., 208-429-0011, smokymountainpizza.com. PAELLA AND TAPAS CLASS--See Wednesday. 6 p.m. $30. Basque Market, 608 W. Grove St., Boise, 208-433-1208, thebasquemarket.com. Workshops & Classes KNITTING SKILL SET CLASS--See Wednesday. 1-3 p.m. $25. Puffy Mondaes, 200 12th Ave. S., Nampa, 208-407-3359, www.puffymondaes.com. WATERCOLOR PAINTING--See Wednesday. 3:305:30 p.m. $40 for four classes, plus cost of supplies. Hobby Lobby, 3547 N. Eagle Road, Meridian, 208-855-4798, hobbylobby.com. Art DIDGERIDOOS AND STORYTELLING CLASS--See Wednesday. 4:15-5:15 p.m. $15 + registration fee. Sage International School, 457 E. Parkcenter Blvd., Boise, 208-343-7243, sageinternationalschool.org. ESPECIALLY FOR SENIORS--Senior guests (age 62 and older) receive free admission all day plus a guided talk on the current exhibit. 2 p.m. FREE. Boise Art Museum, 670 Julia Davis Drive, Boise, 208-345-8330, boiseartmuseum.org VALENTINE FOR AIDS 18 th ANNUAL 18th ANN 8 TO BENEFIT SAFETY NET FOR AIDS PROGRAM SNAP SILENT ART AUCTION N FEBRUARY 3 -13 2011 FLYING M COFFEEHOUSE 500 W IDAHO STREET DOWNTOWN BOISE SPECIAL THANKS TO: BOISE WEEKLY, RED FEATHER, BOISE CO-OP, SOCKEYE GRILL AND BREWERY, PICTURE THIS FRAME SHOP, JOHN CARPENTER'S FLOWERS, KRISTEN RAECKE DESIGN, FLYING M, STEPHANIE DICKEY, CLASSIC DESIGN STUDIO BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 25 Citizen BOISE BICYCLE PROJECT VOLUNTEER NIGHT-- See Wednesday. 6-8 p.m. Boise Bicycle Project, 1027 Lusk St., Boise, 208-429-6520, boisebicycleproject.org. Kids & Teens LEAP TROUPE--See Wednesday. 6-7 p.m. $150 for entire session. Trey McIntyre Project Headquarters, 775 Fulton St., Boise, 877-867-2320, treymcintyre. com. TEEN LEADERSHIP OPPORTUNITY--Help plan events and become a member of the Teen Advisory Board. Gain experience and satisfy volunteer hours. 4 p.m. FREE. Library at Cole and Ustick, 7557 W. Ustick Road, 208-570-6900, boisepubliclibrary.com. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M NOISE JOS E M ANDOJANA IN A WORD Seattle-based Ivan & Alyosha kick off tour in Boise STEPHEN FOSTER Though Ivan & Alyosha band leader Tim Wilson may not have read the entirety of The Brothers Karamazov, from which he took his band's name, he shares a fondness for words with the books's author, Fyodor Dostoyevsky. But Wilson sets his stories to music. Ivan & Alyosha have a folk, pop, Americana, indie rock and country sound--but above all else, the Seattle quartet tap into a sound and feeling that is wholly rooted in the warm, rainy embrace of the Pacific Northwest. The band's new EP, Fathers Be Kind (Missing Piece Records) was recorded in a barn just 30 miles north of Seattle. The EP highlights Wilson's rich vocals with acoustic arrangements that span between back wood romps and introspective ballads, and keenly penned lyrics about love, nature and spirituality. Ivan & Alyosha: Maybe not the Brothers Karamazov but brothers all the same. After breaking out at last year's South By Southwest with a spot on NPR's "Top new ways. I always love listening to artists them from Seattle through Nebraska, over 100 of SXSW" list, the band has been on or songwriters who can say something to Iowa, down to Tennessee, back to New a steady uphill climb. Their song "Easy to in a very simply way, yet articulate some York, and then all the way to California via Love" was featured on NPR's "Song of the SXSW in Austin. Interestingly, the tour kicks profound things within the simplicity. I take Day" in 2010, and the band has been tourhowever much time I want to pick words off on Tuesday, Feb. 15, at Reef. ing since. and phrases and lines that best articulate "Being on the road is a challenge, for "We're putting the pieces together and what I feel. I like being able to take the time sure. But I think as along as everybody's on making it work," said Wilson. "We've had and think about what I'm saying. I've never some exciting opportunities that we've taken the same page and we're all having fun, it's really been super drawn to bands that I great," said Wilson. "Before we go on stage part in, and we still have some to get to. we get together and basically say, `Let's play don't know what they're talking about." "I think I would have quit this a long And while Wilson is drawn to literary lanlike this is the last time we'll ever play.' We time ago if it was something I could get guage, he doesn't bother with it so much when like to get rowdy and have fun. Also, we away from. But I just can't get away from asked to describe his own band's sound. it. It's a part of me, and I will do this for the do four-part harmony. It's fun to play in "Maybe folk-pop might be the best way front of people and sing harmony with your rest of my life," he said. to describe it. But at the same time, to us friends, but we just try to play it loud, play The young band has been going strong it's just kind of like, everything falls under it fast and hope that people enjoy it." for two years. On their first EP, The Verse, the rock 'n' roll genre. But that's very broad Complementing the four-part harmonies The Chorus (Cheap Lullaby Records), the and wide. It doesn't really mean anything are Wilson's highly literate, personalized group only consisted of Wilson and guitaranymore. So it's definitely folky but kind of lyrics and his crisp singing voice. He draws ist Ryan Carbary. Not long after the EP's out each consonant and vowel for maximum melody-based. Pop music really." release however, guitarist Tim Kim, bassist When Ivan & Alyosha come to Boise effect, while varyPete Wilson (Tim's they'll be bringing their families with them, ing between hushed brother) and tourincluding Wilson's newborn child. His newtones and billowing ing drummer James Tuesday, Feb. 15, 8 p.m., FREE found fatherhood and the struggles therein crescendos to add an McAlister filled out REEF extra layer of emotion are reflected in the title of Father Be Kind, the current lineup. 105 S. Sixth St. and it's a subject that constantly weighs on 208-287-9200 to his meticulously "I think it's reefboise.com the songwriter's mind. It's not easy raising a crafted songs. just been a natural family, especially when balancing a career as "Does she get progression," said a young, up-and-coming musician. inside your head / all Wilson. "We never "It's certainly a struggle and a challenge, the stupid things that you've said / she's the wanted to add band members just to add but we believe in it, and I think that there only reason you get out of bed / beautiful band members. We always wanted to make are other people who believe in it too and and lovely is she / wouldn't find one who sure it was the right fit first, then worry get what we're doing," said Wilson. "Right about the musical side ... that time spent to- would disagree / standing beside every now we're the closest we've ever been to gether rehearsing and playing a lot of shows decent man /there's a better woman," from making this our career. There's always has just been crucial to developing the sound "Everything is Burning." something that keeps us going. There always "I try to write in a pretty specific lanof this band." seems to be one more door that takes us to guage," said Wilson. "Things that people Ivan & Alyosha are preparing to set out that next level." will understand but kind of articulated in on their longest tour yet, 29 dates that take 26 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 27 GUIDE WEDNESDAY FEB. 9 AMY WEBER AND BEN BURDICK TRIO--8 p.m. FREE. Sapphire BARCELONA--With He Is We and Lady Danville. 7 p.m. $8 adv., $10 at the door. Neurolux BILLY ZERA--7 p.m. FREE. Sully's BLUE DOOR FOUR--With Arts West Live. 7 p.m. FREE. Blue Door BOISE BLUES SOCIETY JAM SESSION--8 p.m. FREE. Jo's Sunshine Lounge THE BOURBON DOGS--5:30 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Meridian BRIANNE GRAY--6 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Downtown CHRIS GUTIERREZ--6 p.m. FREE. Gelato Cafe Doctor Cool DAN COSTELLO--5:45 p.m. FREE. Solid DOCTOR COOL--8 p.m. FREE. Reef GIZZARD STONE--9:30 p.m. FREE. Grainey's JONATHAN WARREN AND THE BILLYGOATS--8:45 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's KEVIN KIRK--With Jon Hyneman, Phil Garonzik and Erin Hall. 7 p.m. FREE. Chandlers PATRICIA FOLKNER AND JOEL KASERMAN--7 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel THE THROWDOWN--With The Decade Blues Band, Soul Serene and Customary. 8:30 p.m. FREE. Liquid THE TOASTERS--With Voice of Reason, Hotel Chelsea and The Useless. 8 p.m. $8. Red Room TRAVIS MCDANIEL--6 p.m. FREE. Lulu's Barcelona THE VANPAEPAEGHEMS--5:30 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Bown THURSDAY FEB. 10 ALLEN WENTZ AND FRIEND JAM AND OPEN MIC--9 p.m. FREE. Bouquet BATTLE OF THE BANDS: ROUND ONE--7:30 p.m. FREE. Knitting Factory BLUE DOOR FOUR--With Arts West Live. 7 p.m. FREE. The Blue Door BRANDON PRICHETT--8 p.m. FREE. Reef FRIM FRAM FOUR--8:45 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's HIGH DESERT BAND--6:30 p.m. FREE. Whitewater Pizza KEN HARRIS AND RICO WEISMAN--6 p.m. FREE. Berryhill THE PLOT IN YOU--With Armor For The Broken and Mozart Season. 6:30 p.m. $10. The Venue PRIORY--With Fauxbois, Mousy Brown and Youth Lagoon. 8 p.m. $5. VAC ROB PAPER--Steve Eaton and Phil Garonzik. 7 p.m. FREE. Chandlers RYAN WISSINGER--5:45 p.m. FREE. Solid THE SALOONATICS--9 p.m. FREE. Buffalo Club SHON SANDERS AND AMY WEBER--7 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel FRIDAY FEB. 11 A TASTY JAMM--7 p.m. FREE. Willi B's AVENGED SEVENFOLD--6:30 p.m. $39.75 or four for $99. See Picks, Page 16. Taco Bell Arena BLUES ADDICTS--8 p.m. FREE. Willowcreek-Eagle CANDREAD AND RIZING REZISTANCE--8:30 p.m. FREE. Piper Pub FRANK MARRA--6:30 p.m. FREE. Twig's JAZZ WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE-- Featuring Gail Pettis. 5 p.m. $50-$75. Blue Door JOHN CAZAN--5 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel JOHN HANSEN--8:45 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's JOHN JONES, MIKE SEIFRIT AND JON HYNEMAN--With Kevin Kirk and Sally Tibbs. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Chandlers JONATHAN WARREN AND THE BILLYGOATS--10 p.m. FREE. Liquid KAYLEIGH JACK--8 p.m. FREE. Corkscrews THE NEW TRIO--8 p.m. FREE. Gamekeeper POP CULT KIDS--9:30 p.m. $3. Grainey's GUIDE/LISTEN HERE GUIDE/LISTEN HERE MOSTLY MUFF, FEB. 12, VAC If you innocently assumed Mostly Muff was a new pastry store or an auto parts supplier, think again. Local illustrator Julia Green's poster for the mostly female, '70s classic rock cover band leaves little to the imagination. From a pair of unzipped, scandalously short jean cut-offs, the words Mostly Muff spring forth amid parted pubes. Vagenious. On Saturday, Feb. 12, at Visual Arts Collective, Mostly Muff--which features Lisa Simpson from Finn Riggins on guitar, Ivy Meissner from Le Fleur on bass, Gia Trotter from The Very Most and Spondee on keyboards, Tristan Trotter on drums and VAC owner Sam Stimpert on tambourine--will celebrate their triumphant return. "We're going to dress up, we hope that other people will dress up ... really my muse is Robert Plant. I'm going to wear a sexy, silky shirt, maybe some tight jeans that flare out at the bottom," said Meissner. Also going down, ahem, that night are performances by '80s male cover band Hairless Whisker, Matt Damon's Love Child, The Dirty Moogs and a dance after party with DJ Dug. --Tara Morgan 8 p.m., $5. VAC, 3638 Osage St., 208-424-8297, visualartscollective.com. T BIRD AND THE BREAKS, FEB. 12, REEF If you want a feel for how the Reef is going to roll on Saturday, Feb. 12, check out the "Everybody Wants to Be a Cat" scene in Disney's Aristocats. A feline funk band stomps on a piano until it smashes through the floorboards of a seven-story building and cats spill out into the street playing broken instruments. That's the G-rated version of what to expect at a T Bird and the Breaks concert. The 10-piece Austin, Texas, soul band brings enough ass-shaking funk to smash through the sturdiest floor. Spearheaded by Tim "T Bird" Crane, T Bird and the Breaks channel old school James Brown and Otis Redding, with finger-snapping female back up vocalists and a swinging brass section to boot. On the songs "Esmerelda," Crane belts out lines like "Chunky funk comin' outta the trunk / gonna spread the news like stink from a skunk," with horns and high-pitched female harmonies swirling in the background. Talk about breaking it down. --Tara Morgan 9:30 p.m., $5. The Reef, 105 S. Sixth St., 208-287-9200, reefboise.com. WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 28 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly GUIDE REBECCA SCOTT--8 p.m. FREE. Sockeye RIFF RAFF--10 p.m. FREE. Quarter Barrel ROCCI JOHNSON BAND--9:30 p.m. $5 after 10 p.m. Hannah's RYAN WISSINGER--5:45 p.m. FREE. Solid THE SALOONATICS--9 p.m. $5. Buffalo Club SYNRGY--9:30 p.m. $5. Reef JONATHAN WARREN AND THE BILLYGOATS--8 p.m. FREE. Willi B's MIGUEL GONZALES--Noon. FREE. Casa del Sol MILES HAEBERLE AND AARON HANSEN--9 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Downtown MOSTLY MUFF--With Hairless Whisker, Matt Damon's Love Child and The Dirty Moogs. See Listen Here, Page 28. 8 p.m. $5. VAC THE NEW TRIO--8 p.m. FREE. Gamekeeper POP CULT KIDS--9:30 p.m. $3. Grainey's RIFF RAFF--8 p.m. FREE. Creekside Lounge RIZING REZISTANCE--9:30 p.m. FREE. Liquid ROCCI JOHNSON BAND--9:30 p.m. $5 after 10 p.m. Hannah's RYAN WISSINGER--5:45 p.m. FREE. Solid THE SAINT VALENTINE'S DAY MASSACRE--Featuring Karin Comes Killing, Black Tooth Grin, Threshold, Half The World and Stop, Drop And Party. 8 p.m. $6. Knitting Factory THE SALOONATICS--9 p.m. $5. Buffalo Club SPUDMAN--8 p.m. FREE. Corkscrews Pop Cult Kids T BIRD AND THE BREAKS-- See Listen Here, Page 28. 9:30 p.m. $5. Reef TAUGE & FAULKNER--8:45 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's DAN COSTELLO AND THE TRUCK STOP TRIO--8 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel IVAN AND ALYOSHA--8 p.m. FREE. Reef JEFF MOLL AND GUESTS--8:30 p.m. FREE. Ha' Penny Blaze N Kelly THE BLUE DOOR FOUR--5 p.m. $50-$75. Blue Door PATRICIA FOLKNER--6:30 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel PUNK MONDAY--9 p.m. $2. Liquid RUSS PFEIFER--6 p.m. FREE. Berryhill THE SHAUN BRAZELL BAND-- With David Veloz. 6:30 p.m. FREE. Chandlers STEVEN TONEY--6 p.m. FREE. Solid KEVIN KIRK--With John Jones. 7 p.m. FREE. Chandlers LARRY CONKLIN--11 a.m. FREE. Moon's LIKE A ROCKET--10:30 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's REBECCA SCOTT--7 p.m. FREE. Blue Door TERRI EBERLEIN--6:30 p.m. FREE. Berryhill THE BOURBON DOGS--5:30 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Meridian BRIANNE GRAY--5:30 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Bown DAN COSTELLO--5:45 p.m. FREE. Solid FIREFIGHTERS CANCER BENEFIT--Featuring Keegan Smith & The Fam. 7 p.m. $10 donation. Reef GIZZARD STONE--9:30 p.m. FREE. Grainey's JIM FISHWILD--6 p.m. FREE. Highlands Hollow JONATHAN WARREN AND THE BILLYGOATS--8:45 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's KEVIN KIRK--With Jon Hyneman, Phil Garonzik and Erin Hall. 7 p.m. FREE. Chandlers SUNDAY FEB. 13 BEN BURDICK, BILL LILES-- Noon. FREE. Grape Escape GREG PERKINS AND RICK CONNOLLY: THE SIDEMEN--6 p.m. FREE. Chandlers JIM LEWIS--11 a.m. FREE. Focaccia's JONAH SHUE--With Hokum HiFlyers, The Country Club and Bill Coffey. 7 p.m. FREE. Pengilly's REX MILLER--5:30 p.m. FREE. Berryhill TONY FURTADO BAND--8 p.m. $10. Reef SATURDAY FEB. 12 BRANDON PRITCHETT--8:30 p.m. FREE. Piper Pub DEREK YAPLE-SCHOBERT-- 7:30 p.m. $30. Blue Door ERIC GRAE--6 p.m. FREE. Berryhill JON HYNEMAN--With Sally Tibbs and Kevin Kirk. 7 p.m. FREE. Chandlers WEDNESDAY FEB. 16 AMY WEBER AND BEN BURDICK TRIO--8 p.m. FREE. Sapphire BEN BURDICK--6 p.m. FREE. Flatbread-Downtown BLUE DOOR FOUR--With Arts West Live. 7 p.m. FREE. Blue Door LARRY KISER--6 p.m. FREE. Gelato Cafe PATRICIA FOLKNER AND JOEL KASERMAN--7 p.m. FREE. Lock, Stock & Barrel ROCCI JOHNSON BAND--9:30 p.m. FREE. Hannah's THE THROWDOWN--With Craving Dawn, Moonshine and Mayhem and Dying Famous. FREE. Liquid MONDAY FEB. 14 BOISE BLUES SOCIETY JAM SESSION--8 p.m. FREE. Jo's Sunshine Lounge GUTTERMOUTH--With Hotel Chelsea. 8 p.m. $10. Gusto TUESDAY FEB. 15 BLAZE N KELLY--8 p.m. FREE. Sockeye CARTER FREEMAN--6 p.m. FREE. Solid V E N U E S Don't know a venue? Visit www.boiseweekly.com for addresses, phone numbers and a map. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 29 ARTS/VISUAL ROCK 'N' POETRY Poet Derrick Brown turns up the volume JOSH GROSS Attention ladies: When poet Derrick Brown performs in Boise on Saturday, Feb. 12, he wants to make love to you while wearing ice skates. He will "do anything you ask, unless he has been drinking. Then it is opposite day, a holiday." Or so he says in his poem "Cotton in the Air." Brown can do that sort of thing because in his vision of the future, poets are high-profile, Derrick Brown is not horsing around, his poetry shoots from the hip. swaggering performance institutions that make audiences squirm, squeal and swoon. "If you ever have a novelist and a poet at Brown also started The Lightbulb Mouth "All the writers on Write Bloody are a reading, you'll often see the poet sell more Radio Hour as a way to promote his authors. books because of a poem's ability to hit you in encouraged to take the reins with most of the His goal with the show, which is performed things that come with putting out a book: getgut," says Brown. "A novel is like getting atlive in a Long Beach bar and available as a tacked with karate; a poem is more like a gun. ting your own press, booking your own tours, podcast, was to make a literary show fun by that sort of stuff," says Maziar. It's fast and quick. Like a tiny gun." combining readings with news, sing-alongs That's nearly the opposite of what Maziar It's a compelling artistic worldview and an experienced with the publication of his newest and oddities. A regular feature of the show is unusual one for someone whose career arc an "informationist," an expert of some sort book, Last Light of Day. Maziar says the started with being an Army paratrooper. But who spends 10 minutes teaching the audience imprint for that book, Publication Studio, what sets Brown apart is the lack of poetry in how to do anything from donating sperm to how he executes his vision: Pretty words take a does little to no marketing of their books, preferring word of mouth or dedicated readers being a private detective. Brown once booked back seat to action and market savvy. a repo man who explained how to keep your Brown, who calls Long Beach, Calif., home, to seek out books on their own. car from being repossessed: Get in. As long "Derrick Brown has really succeeded in tours constantly, performing high-energy live as you're inside, they can't tow you. shows that include music and comedy. He also creating something special, with new exciting But even without all of Brown's marketing authors and a fan base that may never have hosts a literary radio show called The Lightbeen exposed to them if it hadn't been for what and multimedia madness, his poetry is fascinatbulb Mouth Radio Hour. And on top of that, ing enough to stand alone. His words and he started," says Maziar. he founded and runs Write Bloody Publishing, And if you're wondering, Brown doesn't see thematic framework alternate between bizarre, a critically lauded independent press. "It's about mobilizing this new movement," his business strategy as a betrayal of bohemian hysterical and representational of the zeitgeist. In "Meatloaf" he asks insightful questions or indie values. Brown says. "I think the marketing is key. I've "It's still DIY to hire your friends," he says. about symbolism. always come from a place where instead of "I always wondered why a diamond meant "Someone you know probably makes websites making a flyer, why not pay someone who's you loved somebody. / Why not a brick? / Why better than you. Someone probably plays guireally good to make a flyer. Then you get not a snail? / Or a wombat or a cat's brain? more gigs and more money than if you made a tar better than you. When you find out what Why not a pair of handcuffs to show the world you're good at, you make a team." crappy Myspace site." you'll be linked with them forever? / Why not It's a remarkably solid strategy considering Write Bloody Publishing embodies that give them a trophy full of zombie lipstick to the company's fraudulent origins. strategy, employing rock 'n' roll poster design"I was trying to trick printers into giving me prove you will kiss their brains out forever?" ers to create striking covers and luscious interiHis poem "Come Alive" is a mayoral addiscounts," says Brown. "You get a discount ors that would demand reading even if Brown dress to the animals of Narnia, in which he if you're a press and print eight to 10 books a wasn't curating bold new voices. says he will use his status to proclaim a day for year, so I made a fake "We're treating the website with covers for dipping their hands in butter. That way they company like a music books that didn't exist. can practice letting go of what they were. company, where each JUDGING BOISE'S BEST BAD POET Scandalabra, Brown's most recent book, has But then other writers author has to act like Friday, Feb. 11, 7 p.m., $5. Liquid, 405 S. Eighth St., 208-287-5379, liquidboise.com. a five-out-of-five-stars rating on amazon.com, started sending me a band," says Brown. as does another collection, Born in the Year of their manuscripts." "We're not doing BOOK SIGNING Saturday, Feb. 12, 2 p.m., FREE. So Brown read a lot the Butterfly Knife. the traditional book Rediscovered Bookshop, 180 N. Eighth St., But what really sells the whole package is of books on publishing, model where you spend 208-376-4229, rdbooks.org. Brown's commitment to making live poetry "asked a lot of stupid money on a book, ship PERFORMING WITH THOMAS PAUL something worth celebrating. questions," started a it out and then make it Saturday, Feb. 12, 8 p.m., $15 adv., $20 "I hope that one day going to a poetry company and ran with available online eight door. Rose Room, 718 W. Idaho St., show is as common as going to see a band or it. In fact, he ran all months later." withanhproductions.com. to the movies," says Brown, who adds that he the way to a review Paul Maziar, who has "a lot of saucy secrets planned" for Boise. in Forbes magazine, co-authored the Write "You can expect free body tackles, hand which Brown claims was the only positive one Bloody-published What It Is: What It Is with they've ever given an indie-press. Since then, he kissing, gallivanting and a laughing kind of Matt Maust--bassist for indie rock band, The cry," says Brown. added Write Fuzzy, a children's imprint. Cold War Kids--agrees. 30 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 31 SCREEN/THE BIG SCREEN LEIGH IS LIVELY, COPPOLA IS A CROCK Another Year is an affirmation of life, Somewhere is a lifeless drudge GEORGE PRENTICE Each of these films explore the human Another Year is worth watching another time ... experience but take very different paths in In some theater Somewhere, there's a much better movie on right now. and another. getting there. Another Year, which examines twilight years in suburban London, is their friends and family. but director Mike Leigh has refereed a tunities, but alas, no. It's a movie full of life and energy. Somewhere, which Gerri's co-worker Mary (Lesley Manquirky team of characters thrown together about nothing. And that's exactly what it looks at Hollywood youth, feels arthritic. ville) is a mess. She's a functional alcoholic, in the game of life. Leigh's inspired genius delivers: nothing. The worst first: Somewhere, the and that's about the best thing you can say lies somewhere in the silent moments The young Coppola has given us some latest, critically-acclaimed effort from Sofia about her. Manville's layered of Another Year. The of the best (Lost in Translation) and some Coppola shadows Johnny Marco performance vaults her to the dialogue is economical, of the worst (Marie Antoi(Stephen Dorff) at the inSOMEWHERE (R) short list of the industry's fingiving way to life-bending nette). Considering this is famous Chateau Marmont, est actresses. She was named pauses. And the cast ably only her fourth feature, it Sunset Boulevard's version Directed by Sofia Coppola ANOTHER YEAR (PG-13) best actress this year by the deconstructs the script might be appropriate to of jejune pretension: Greta Starring Steven Dorff, Directed by Mike Leigh National Board of Review. with ease and grace. cut her some slack. At Garbo, Hunter Thompson Elle Fanning Starring Jim Broadbent, Leigh and Coppola are Oscar winner Jim least she hasn't returned and Jim Morrison lived there; Opens Friday, Feb. 18, Ruth Sheen similar in that they develop a Broadbent (Iris) marks to acting--remember her John Belushi died of an overat The Flicks Now playing at The Flicks final script through improvisahis seventh collaboration embarrassing performance dose there. tion during lengthy rehearsals. with Leigh, dating back in Godfather III? Somewhere asks us to care Leigh has parlayed the skill into 20 years. Broadbent's Now the best of the two. for Marco for no apparent numerous successes: Secrets & Lies, TopsyTom is friend, lover and husband to Ruth Another Year has been falsely advertised reason other than the fact that he's a faTurvy, Vera Drake, Happy-Go-Lucky and Sheen's Gerri. They are the centerpiece of as a film about old age. Nothing could be mous actor. His 11-year-old daughter (Elle now Another Year. Coppola's Somewhere Another Year as they celebrate and somefurther from the truth. Its core characters Fanning) comes to stay with him, which unfortunately goes nowhere. times tolerate the foibles and failings of are certainly on the far side of middle age, naturally would give the plot some oppor- LISTINGS/SCREEN Special Screenings HOOD TO COAST ENCORE EVENT--Documentary about four relay teams that run the world's largest relay race. Thursday, Feb. 10, 7:30 p.m., $12.50. Edwards 22, 7709 W. Overland Road, 208-377-9603, regmovies.com. THE METROPOLITAN OPERA: NIXON IN CHINA--Peter Seller's story about President Nixon's visit to communist China. Saturday, Feb. 12, 11 a.m., $18-$24. Edwards 22, 7709 W. Overland Road, 208-377-9603, regmovies.com. WELCOME TO SHELBYVILLE--Documentary about one small town's issues with immigrant integration. Discussion to follow the movie. Tuesday, Feb. 15, 5:30-7 p.m., FREE. Boise State Student Union Hatch Ballroom. SCREEN/THE TUBE FROM BELL TO LUTHER, IDRIS ELBA DOES TROUBLED WELL With even a glance at the screen as you click through the channels on your TV, you will likely see the face of at least one actor from HBO's The Wire--especially if you watch Law & Order: CI. Many of the actors' bit-part appearances were from before the success of the cable drama, but many of those actors have landed softly since the series finale in 2008. For example, Michael K. Williams (Omar) plays gangster businessman Chalky White on HBO's Boardwalk Empire. Amy Ryan (Beadie Russell) plays Michael Scott's love interest on The Office. Wendell Pierce (William "Bunk" Moreland) stars in Treme. And Britishborn Idris Elba who played Stringer Bell, a drug lord's second-in-command with a head for business (and who also had a story arc on The Office), has found a niche in the equally driven title character of the BBC crime drama Luther. Season one of Luther is available on Netflix. Season No. 1 of Luther, which wrapped up in mid-2010, saw Detective Chief Inspector John Luther let a suspect fall to his almost death, befriend a beautiful psychopath, lose and reunite with his wife only to lose her again, be completely betrayed by a trusted friend and solve every major crime brought before him. Luther is an oft-seen genius-but-troubled-detective trope a la Vincent D'Onofrio's Robert Goren on L&O: CI, and critics panned Luther's early "lumbering" episodes. But Elba is brilliant as a brooding, volatile, myopic perfectionist as he proved in The Wire--he's just on the other side of the law this time. By season's end, fans and critics alike had come around and were hoping for a second season. And for now, at least a couple of episodes of Luther have been ordered, so hopefully we'll see Elba chasing the bad guys across London's streets again soon. If that doesn't work out, he can probably score a few more appearances on The Office. --Amy Atkins WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M Opening GNOMEO AND JULIET--James McAvoy, Michael Caine and Emily Blunt lend their voices to this animated farce that depicts two garden gnomes caught up in a neighborhood feud. (G) Edwards 9 33 JUST GO WITH IT--A well-known doctor (Adam Sandler) enlists the help of his 32 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly LISTINGS/SCREEN NEW DVD RELEASE/SCREEN 32 assistant (Jennifer Aniston) to help him romance a much younger woman. (PG-13) Edwards 9 JUSTIN BIEBER: NEVER SAY NEVER--Documentary about Bieber's rise from obscurity in Ontario, Canada. (G) Edwards 9, Edwards 22 For movie times, visit boiseweekly. com or scan this QR code. I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE (UNRATED) Given America's recent love affair with gory torture movies (e.g. Hostel, the Saw series), it was only a matter of time before someone dredged up the controversial 1978 cult classic I Spit on Your Grave. Like the original--which shares a DVD release date with the remake--the 2010 film portrays a raped woman (Sarah Butler) exacting gruesome and humiliating revenge on her attackers. It's a simple formula: The first half gratuitously depicts the woman's rape, and the second half gratuitously depicts the rapists' executions. Countless reputable critics have condemned the movie as tasteless and despaired over the morality of an audience that enjoys it. Even so, it sounds like a formula for success in today's movie market. YEAR OF THE FISH David Kaplan wrote and directed this adult Cinderella story set in New York's Chinatown. Ye Xian takes a job at the massage parlor of the wicked Madame Su, who expects Ye Xian to treat the clients to "happy endings." Refusing this, the 17-year-old becomes an unappreciated housemaid. To make matters worse, Ye Xian depends on her income from Madame Su to provide for her sick father. But things take a turn for the better when she meets a mysterious woman and a goldfish who aid her in finding her prince. The movie features a style of animation called rotoscoping, in which film of live actors and settings is animated to provide a dreamy amalgam of the two. --Eric Austin TH E AT E R S EDWARDS 22 BOISE 208-377-9603, regmovies.com EDWARDS 9 BOISE 208-338-3821, regmovies.com EDWARDS 14 NAMPA 208-467-3312, regmovies.com THE FLICKS 208-342-4222, theflicksboise.com MAJESTIC CINEMAS MERIDIAN 208-888-2228, hallettcinemas.com FOR SECOND-RUN MOVIES: NORTHGATE CINEMA COUNTRY CLUB REEL NAMPA REEL 208-377-2620, reeltheatre.com OVERLAND PARK $1 CINEMA 208-377-3072, opcmovies.com NORTHERN LIGHTS CINEMA AND GRILL 208-475-2999, northernlightscinemagrill.com APP/SCREEN KISS MY APPS, TAXMAN It was only a matter of when. Beginning in 2011, you may now file your taxes on your mobile phone. SnapTax, the new app from Intuit, is already available for iPhone and Android. Filers take a photo of their W-2 and image-recognition software does the rest: a quick review and presto, you're filing for a fee of $15. Intuit promises that it should take no more than 15 minutes. However, there are a few caveats: individuals must earn less than $80,000, married couples must earn less than $100,000, filers must have no depenor Android. The reader is a swiping device dents and be younger than age 65. that accepts American Express, Discover, While we're on the topic of MasterCard and Visa. Once paymoney, brace yourself for Square. ment has been received, the card Visit turbotax.com/ The new app from Jack Dorsey, holder's bank statement will refersnaptax for more the man who gave the world Twitence Square as well as the card information. ter, allows your phone to accept holder's name, date and total. credit card payments. Square requires a tiny square card reader that plugs --George Prentice into the audio input jack of an iPhone, iPad WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 33 REC GAB R IELLE C OU GHENOU R STEPPING UP ON THE THIRD RAIL Hip-hop/graffiti/ snowboard party hits Bogus Basin ANDREW CRISP Timmy Grins is pretty sure he'll find a wife at Bogus Basin. "Tell the single ladies out there in the 21 to 25 range I've been on Oprah. I'm a really, really good guy. I'm like [a] lottery ticket," Grins says. About four years ago, Grins and his part"I'll slip some of that Big Boi stuff in there, ner Pat Hession masterminded an amalgamatoo. For the punk stuff I'll try to do more like tion of cool, blending hip-hop, MCs, street Bloodhound Gang, NOFX--keep it interestartists, fashion, culture and snowboarders. ing," says Dolamarx. They called it the Under Armour 3rd Rail In addition to spinning tracks, eight MCs Jam--after the lethal, electrified rail of New who travel with the tournament will take the York subway system--and turned it into a stage to face off in the Battle Below Zero: a country-crossing party on wheels. Now that no-holds-barred exhibition of rapping and party is coming to Bogus Basin for the first flow skills. time on Saturday, Feb. 12. "They'll be judged on crowd response, on "We're very young, very aggressive, very grass-roots. [We] move in from one stop to the their beat, on their lyrical flow and their lyrinext--it's all about that one stop," says Grins. cal content," says Dolamarx. The whole point of the MC battle is to With an army of MCs, DJs, boarders and graffiti artists, the rail jam travels from one ski hill pair original beats, created by the artists, to the next, taking over each resort with a rails with their own freestyle lyrics laid on top. Dolamarx emphasizes the importance of the course and up to 100 riders per stop competcontent being homemade. An artist could use, ing for cash, prizes and Sparta style glory. say, a Nicki Minaj track and rhyme over it, "It's not the type of thing where we move but Dolamarx cautions: in and move out and have finals elsewhere," "If they wanna do it, they can do it, but Grins says. they're not going to win the competition, They started small in 2007, taking the you know what I mean?" party from their home base of Mountain On the sidelines of the event, a troop of Creek, N.J., to Lake Tahoe and then Beech graffiti artists will Mountain, N.C., spray up fresh street their second year. Saturday, Feb. 12, 2 p.m. art onto portable The 3rd Rail Jam has Registration is $25 and open to all riders. plywood installations, expanded its 2011 Early registration is available online bringing a visual eleschedule to include at 3rdrailjam.com. ment to the hip-hop eight ski hills--double BOGUS BASIN culture. the stops in 2010. 2600 N. Bogus Basin Road But the main event Grins singled out 208-429-6592 bogusbasin.org is the rail jam itself. A Boise for more than its rail jam puts a snowpretty ladies. boarder or skier on a "There's defitrack toward rails set in the ground--think nitely quite a bit going on in that neck of the a skateboarding park. The competitor uses woods," Grins says. the rails to perform tricks, grinds or spins, And with the party atmosphere the 3rd Rail Jam brings, for a couple of days there will striving for a fluid grouping of moves. The 3rd Rail Jam competition is broken into be even more. four separate divisions: an all-girls category, "I really try to keep [the music] underone for kids 15 years and younger, best of ground, old-school hip-hop--like A Tribe Called Quest," says DJ Dolamarx. "Especially breed and a skiers' division. Evan Williams of Boise's The Board Room will be competfor a snowboarding, X Games style kind of ing in the event. competition." "If it's a rail jam you just kind of prepare Dolamarx and DJ Image spin tracks for for that, trying to get as much time ridthe competition, which has its own Slacker ing rails as you can before the event," says Radio station. Who needs a rail when you can jib a roof? Williams, who rides for The Board Room's snowboard team. "[You build] a repertoire of tricks that you're comfortable with. You want to try to get as much time in whatever prospective event as you can, and get enough training--have some tricks that you feel comfortable doing." It won't be easy. Grins say the stops so far have drawn an average of 100 competitors--with 180 at their home mountain in New Jersey. "Some of the main criteria is definitely going to be style points, how stylish a rider is as he's hitting rails, doing different tricks. Another criteria is definitely going to be difficulty as well," says Matt Rigby of Newt and Harold's. He'll also serve as a local judge for the competition. "A big thing is uniqueness, too. New tricks, progressive linkage of tricks. Front, back-side lip slides are pretty basic trick maneuvers. Nose presses--balancing while touching the nose or tail down the whole rail consistently--spins onto rails, 280s, the occasional 450, but I don't know if we'll be seeing any of that specifically." Rigby may not compete anymore, but he knows what skill looks like. "I don't know if I can keep up anymore with the younger kids. I've definitely had my heyday," he says. Taking the top spots in each division nets riders some cool prizes: swag from sponsors like Beats by Dr. Dre, 33Third, Grenade, Under Armour, Kangol, Bern, Launch Snowboards, Ninthward Skis and the United States Marine Corps. Winners also take home cold hard cash. In addition to the prizes, $5 of every boarder's sign-up fees goes to Amped 4 a Cure, which seeks to generate money for cancer research. "I think Boise is going to be huge. The people out there are really `on board' with the program," Grins says, pun intended. Hopefully the Bogus Basin ladies like a corny joke. WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 34 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 35 REC/LISTINGS Register 2011 SLAMMER ROAD RACE-- Boise Development Cycling presents this road race on Sunday, March 20, at 10 a.m. The race begins and ends on S. Cole Road, half a mile south of Ten Mile Creek Road. There is a cash prize. Register online at sportsbaseonline.com through race day. For more info call 208343-3782. $15. BEAT THE DOC FUN RUN AND CANINE CANTER--5K-loop course including off-road trails and a gravel road to be held on Saturday, March 26, at 10 a.m. Register online at spondoro. com through March 26. $30.50$35.50, plus $5 for your dog. Eagle Island State Park, 2691 Mace Road, Eagle. DRY CREEK HALF MARATHON--Half marathon to be held on Saturday, April 2, at 10 a.m. Course starts and finishes at the Merc at the Hidden Springs town square and is part of the La Sportiva Mountain Cup Series. Register online at bluecirclesports.com through April 2. $38. LES BOIS 10K TRAIL RUN 2011--10K run to be held on Saturday, March 5. Course is out-and-back on dirt trails, 3.1 miles each way, behind Fort Boise Park. Register online at bluecirclesports.com through March 5. $28. REC/PLAY TAKING CYCLING INDOORS FOR THE WINTER Like everyone else in the Northwest, I was adequately forewarned that La Nina would be our winter guest, bringing her icy breath and abundant moisture all season. For sledders, skiers and shredders, that means a bountiful winter worthy of hallelujahs and "sick" days. But if Polartec and Smartwool aren't your thing, what do you do if you're the type who can barely sit still long enough for one rerun of The Office? Fortunately, I can mix it up in the snow. However, I also call myself a cyclist, and the local road race series kicks off well before spring break. I'm not prepping for London 2012 like another area cyclist you might know, but I'm certainly not one to roll to the start line sporting a spare tire around my waist. Bottom line: It might only be February, but I still need to be pedaling. Having blown a wad on a shiny carbon machine last fall, I'm not lacking for a source of motivation. I'm simply frustrated by the local weather pattern. It seems like when it's warm enough to ride outdoors, it rains. Then it gets cold, and it snows. Then it stays cold, and if the roads aren't icy, the wind chill from even a slow spin on the bike is guaranteed to freeze your nose hairs, among other things. Such as it is, many cyclists resign themselves to loss of For more information, fitness in the winter months visit efitcntr.com. because they cannot tolerate the tedium of being locked onto a stationary trainer, pedaling furiously but going nowhere and hearing the sound of their own sweat drip into the puddle beneath them on the floor. Frankly, I can't tolerate it either. But I don't have to. Not long ago, I treated myself to an indoor ride at Boise's Endurance Training and Fitness Center, and it was well worth the price of admission (first time is free). Owned and operated by Douglas Tobin and home to the nationally recognized Boise Young Rider Development Squad, the ETFC is discretely tucked into a nondescript city block of downtown Boise. Fitness activity there is limitless, but I chose to hook my bike to a CompuTrainer, which creates a static ride, complimented by a real-time readout of time elapsed, miles per hour and power output. And if the mental gymnastics of figuring out your average production of watts per kilogram isn't enough of a distraction, the ETFC has a giant projection screen on the wall. Entertainment options include simulated road courses with other riders to draft and DVDs of Lance Armstrong climbing the Alpe d'Huez during the Tour de France. Pandora Radio or the cyclist's own iPod provides the beat via surround sound speakers that let everyone in the building enjoy Duran Duran's newest digital release. The bad news is, if I'm going to retain some semblance of cycling fitness this winter, most of my riding is going to have to happen indoors. The good news is, it doesn't have to be painfully monotonous--and it might even be fun. --Sarah Barber WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M Events & Workshops HOUSE OF SHIMMY CLASS-- Dance class for 3, 4 and 5 year olds. They will learn new moves and be accompanied by live music from local musicians. Wednesdays, 4-4:45 p.m. through April 20. $150 for entire session. Trey McIntyre Project headquarters, 775 Fulton St., Boise, 877-867-2320, treymcintyre.com. IDAHO STAMPEDE BASKETBALL--Vs. Bakersfield Jam. Wednesday, Feb. 16, 6 p.m. $12-$20. Qwest Arena, 233 S. Capitol Blvd., Boise, 208-4242200 or box office 208-3318497, qwestarenaidaho.com. IDAHO STEELHEADS HOCKEY--Vs. Bakersfield Condors. Wednesday, Feb. 9; Friday, Feb. 11; and Saturday, Feb. 12, at 7:10 p.m. Price varies by night. Qwest Arena, 233 S. Capitol Blvd., Boise, 208-424-2200 or box office 208-331-8497, qwestarenaidaho.com. SKI AND SNOWBOARD WAXING CLASS--Get more out of your skis or snowboard by learning how to wax them yourself. Wednesday, Feb. 16, 7 p.m. FREE. REI, 8300 W. Emerald, Boise, 208-322-1141, rei.com/ stores/boise. UNDER ARMOUR THIRD RAIL JAM--Amateur skiers and snowboarders show off their skills to a hip-hop influenced soundtrack when this national tour makes its stop in Boise. Also features graffiti art, MC battles and an after-party. See story, Page 34. Saturday, Feb. 12, 2 p.m. $20 to participate, FREE to watch. Bogus Basin Mountain Recreation Area, Bogus Basin Road, Boise, 208-332-5100, bogusbasin.org. 36 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly FOOD/NEWS B OB B Y QU ILLAR D FOOD VINTNER WONDERLAND Ice wine is a sweet, wintry treat GUY HAND The weather is bitter on this January morning at the Koenig vineyard southwest of Caldwell. The nearby Snake River has the same sludgy, cement gray look of the sky above and the sharp wind slicing across that river cuts into every inch of unprotected flesh. In other words, it's a beautiful day for ice wine. "Ice wine is unique in that the grapes have to be frozen," says winemaker Greg Koenig as we shiver through leafless rows of grape vines. "Ice wine is concentrated by freezing, and the water molecules within the berries stay frozen and don't come out when you press it." Koenig pulls at a bare, brittle cane. "Only the sweetest juice or the sweetest must comes out." It has to get nasty cold for the water trapped in a grape to freeze sufficiently: 18 degrees or lower. That means, in this part of Southern Idaho, waiting for the mercury to take a steep dive somewhere on the calendar between mid-November and mid-January. Then, on a perfectly frigid morning, it's suddenly harvest time. "It's a real pain," says Koenig with a tight smile as he pulls the collar of his coat around his neck. "It's cold, it's frosty, the tractors don't start. It's pretty miserable. And lots of times people come out and say `Oh, we want to help you with ice wine harvest.' We laugh and invite them back, and the actual morning that we're harvesting ice wine they change their mind and only the toughest pickers end up coming out." Those pickers harvest quickly, in a race against the warmth that comes with even a weak winter sun. It's often foggy, and the fruit is always fragile, sometimes shattering with the lightest touch. "[It's] a little bit like working in a walk in freezer," Koenig says. Ice wine, according to Koenig, was born in Austria or Germany in the late 1700s. Whether from boredom, curiosity or desperation, a grower pressed some frozen fruit left from an earlier harvest and discovered that the essence of a grape, with its high sugar content, and therefore higher freezing point, wasn't yet solid and separated naturally from the frozen water crystals. It must have felt to that first ice-wine maker like squeezing sunlight from a stone. "The first time we began ice wine in 2001, we filled the press and turned it on, and for the first hour, not a drop of juice came out. I was kind of wondering if we were on the right track at all," Koenig says. He soon realized that instead of pressing the grapes for 45 minutes, as he normally WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M Zane Lamprey has a difficult job. Just as his liver. FORK REPORT A sizable crowd gathered outside the Boise City National Bank Building on First Thursday, Feb. 3. The anxious throngs weren't there to gawk at art or swirl nips of local wine, but rather to catch a glimpse inside the recently renovated space that will soon house downtown's newest eatery, Fork. Serving the oh-so-common but difficult to define "Northwest casual cuisine," Fork is a new venture from Cameron Lumsden, former chief operating officer at Flatbread Community Oven. Though the restaurant's interior is mostly empty, save for a number of polished wood tables and chairs, the renovation has gone a long way in changing the vibe of the once chilly space. Warm wood paneling wraps around the building's stately marble columns, and soft light falls across the long, wrap-around bar and ample, ceilingreaching wood shelves. The revamp seems to reflect Fork's more laid-back, comfortfood-focused menu. Items like seared lollipop lamb chops and rosemary Parmesan french fries rub up against chicken pot pies, local ale-braised short ribs, and buttermilk-fried chicken and cheddar waffles. The focus, according to Lumsden, is on local and seasonal produce, and regionally raised meats and fish. Fork will officially open on President's Day, Monday, Feb. 21. 199 N. Eighth St., 208-287-1700, boisefork.com. If watching other people get tanked is your idea of a good time, tune into HDNet on Wednesday, Feb. 9, at 6:30 p.m. to watch Zane Lamprey--the dude with the sweetest gig and most over worked liver in television--take on the Boise booze scene. Host of Drinking Made Easy, Lamprey stopped into the City of Trees to sample a 10-minute martini at Chandlers Steakhouse and some locally distilled hooch from Bardenay Restaurant and Distiller y, as well as to challenge his buddy Steve McKenna to a back-seat french fr y eating contest. For an HDNet channel finder, visit drinkingmade-easy.com. The Eagle Saturday Market is accepting vendor applications for its weekly art and farmers market, which kicks off on Saturday, April 16, and runs through Saturday, Oct. 15, at Heritage Park in downtown Eagle. The Eagle Arts Commission, which hosts the market, is seeking purveyors of fine art, crafts, local produce, herbs, flowers, pottery and more. Applications can be downloaded at eaglearts.org and a vendor meeting will be held on Wednesday, March 2, at 6:30 p.m. at Eagle City Hall. For more info, call 208-921-0477 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.com. --Tara Morgan Ice wine only works if the grapes are harvested when it's f-riesling outside. would with white wine, Koenig had to press those gravel-like orbs for nine hours. "What you end up with is a very diminutive amount of juice coming from the grapes," he says. "Most of the water within the berries still stays in the press, and this incredibly dense sweet nectar drips out of the press and that becomes the juice that we're going to ferment into ice wine." Ice wine is always a gamble. A winemaker has to surrender a perfectly harvestable portion of a vineyard to the vagaries of winter. Long after the rest of his grapes have been picked, pressed and the juice securely poured into kegs or stainless steel tanks, the shriveling ice wine clusters hang exposed to wind, rain and snow. Koenig covers the vines in netting to keep the birds off, but then can do nothing but cross his fingers and wait for the weather to turn really bad. "So is it worth it?" I ask him at the end of a long row, relieved to see he has turned toward the shelter of his warehouse. "Well, it's worth it in that the wine is incredibly unique and beautifully concentrated and intense, and it's something that you can only achieve in difficult conditions," Koenig says. "And when we're pouring ice wine for people the rest of the year in restaurants and at the farmers market and in our tasting room, and seeing their reaction at this incredibly intense product, it's definitely worth it. It's just too hard to do if it wasn't." Back in the relative warmth of that warehouse, Koenig carefully cuts the handdipped seal off a bottle of his 2009 ice wine vintage, then pours an amber, slightly viscous liquid into glasses. With the first sip, I involuntarily blurt out--like some instant ice wine groupie-- "That is fantastic." Maybe it's just the crazy contrast between the weather outside and what tastes like liquefied summer, but I'm hooked. It reminds me of my first knee-buckling French sauternes, a taste far too complex, too compelling to dismiss as simply sweet. "Yeah, the nice thing about ice wine is really the intensity of flavor," Koenig says between slow, thoughtful sips. "A lot of people think it's just a sweet wine, but it's so much more than the sweetness. The sugar is definitely part of it, but it's riesling grapes that all of the sudden take on this incredible aroma of apricot and fig and pear and a little bit of orange peel. You just get this incredible array of beautiful flavors." There is a certain comforting symmetry in the knowledge that a long, dull winter can produce such a sunny, complex drink. And another cool thing about ice wine is that because it's unique to colder climes, wine-award divas like California can't claim it as their own (sip on that Napa Valley). In the northern New World, ice wine is only made in places like Canada, the Finger Lakes of New York and less maritime corners of the Northwest. Southern Idaho, Koenig says, has perfect ice wine terroir. "If you talk about wine as being very rooted in a region, and the terroir of a wine tasting like the soil or the space, ice wine adds another dimension in that you're adding the temperature and the climate of the region it's from," Koenig says. "When we take our ice wine to competitions outside of Idaho, say to the East Coast or to California, I think it's not hard for people to imagine Idaho's snowy mountains, and really tasting the soils and the climate and all the things that go into making ice wine. They can really picture this coming from a place like Idaho." BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 37 FOOD/EXTRA FOOD/REVIEW LAU R IE PEAR M AN Can Crisp take the heat? DEMON'S DELIGHT Capsaicin is what makes chili peppers hot. Concentrated in pepper seeds, it aggravates mammalian flesh, causing intense burning. According to a 2006 article in Nature, tarantula spider venom stimulates the body's capsaicin receptor in the same way chili peppers do. But despite nature's numerous red flags, somewhere along the way, humans became hot-pepper masochists. Nowhere is that more evident than Superb Sushi's Demon's Delight Challenge. The challenge works like this: you have 10 minutes to consume one bowl of miso soup from hell--wasabi powder, sriracha sauce, Hot Streak death sauce, cayenne pepper, sesame oil, diced habanero pepper--followed by a Demon's Delight sushi roll with a side of death sauce infused with habanero. No water, no puking. If you make it through the first round, you get your meal for free, a Superb Sushi Tshirt and your picture on the wall of flame. But if you really want to bring on the pain, you can elect to continue on to the Hot Streak Challenge-- two spicy-tuna hand rolls with two sides of ghost pepperinfused Hot Streak death sauce, topped with two diced habaneros. The Naga Jolokia pepper, or ghost pepper, is just below law enforcement grade pepper spray on the Scoville heat unit scale. BW sent reporter Andrew Crisp to attempt the challenge. To watch Crisp fight back tears while muttering questions like, "Has anyone died of spice poisoning?" visit video.boiseweekly.com or scan the QR code below. --Tara Morgan Don't ask me about my sandwich ... never ask me about my sandwich. CARUSO'S SANDWICH COMPANY A colleague remarked not too long ago that we have more than enough sandwich eateries in downtown Boise. Sometimes a sandwich is just a sandwich. That may be true, but we have a number of bars downtown, as well, and for many of them, the differences are minimal but defining. Just like a favorite pub, a favorite sandwich place offers a little something extra that you can't get at the other joint a block away. Caruso's is the new kid on the downtown sandwich block. With Jimmy John's, Willi B's, Gandolfo's and Eli's, all settled in before it, Caruso's has some work to do to get people to know it's even there, let alone choose it over one of the others. A couple of things work in the deli's favor: it is an Idahobased small chain, the price points are reasonable (around $6 for a huge half sandwich), the menu boasts salads and pasta bowls as well as sammies for lunch, the breakfast menu is ample, the ingredients are fresh and, best of all, the bread is baked fresh every day. At noon on an icy cold Tuesday, the cool corrugated metal wainscotting and wooden tables echoed with pleasant indie music on the stereo, magnifying the joint's emptiness. With three people behind the CARUSO'S SANDWICH counter, and only me on the COMPANY other side, I was all but guar130 N. Eighth St. 208-331-0911 anteed stellar service, which carusosandco.com I received--another check in Caruso's pro column. A check Winter hours: Mon.-Fri., 8 a.m.-4 p.m.; Sat., 9 a.m.-4 went into the con column, p.m.; closed Sun. however, because unless there had been a huge rush before I walked in the door, I couldn't see any reason for half-full bowls of neglected-looking pasta and potato salad in the cooler, and though I was never offered a side, I might have declined. Soon, the Godfather sandwich, which according to the cashier is that location's most popular order, graced my table, provolone cheese dripping down thick layers of turkey, beef and bacon all snuggled in a soft, homemade wheat roll. A peek under the blanket of bread revealed two bright, fresh leaves of romaine lettuce, two surprisingly red, crisp slices of tomato, perfectly thin slices of purple onion and follow-through on my request of extra pickles. Though I'd only ordered the half-sandwich, a quarter was plenty, and the rest was wrapped in paper, speared with a festive toothpick and bagged to go. Even though Caruso's probably won't be the equivalent of my new favorite watering hole, it's nonetheless a worthwhile addition to the downtown sandwich scene. --Amy Atkins WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M 38 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 39 FOOD/TREND HALLOUMI CHEESE It squeaks when you eat it, doesn't melt and is indigenous to Cyprus. So how did a small Idaho cheese maker come to make an awardwinning version of this very weird cheese? "They experimented with it at a cheese-making training we went to in Wisconsin. It was awful," said Stacie Ballard of Ballard Family Dairy and Cheese. The folks at Ballard spent two years trying to perfect the stuff. Judging by the cheese's popularity, it worked. Traditional halloumi is made from sheep and goat milk and is cooked to about 180 degrees (Ballard's version is made with cow's milk). Its higher melting point means it can be fried or grilled, leading to some creative dishes. Cubed and fried halloumi is a chewy, slightly salty addition to tossed salad. One chef serves the cooked Cypriot cheese in place of mozzarella in a caprese salad. Ballard has seen it grilled and skewered with fruit or served veggie burger-style on a bun with barbecue sauce. For an easy snack or appetizer, slice halloumi a quarter-inch thick and lemons as thin as possible and fry or grill both. Berryhill and Co. and Bittercreek Ale House serve Ballard's version, called Golden Greek, as do restaurants in Jackson, Wyo., Sun Valley, Coeur d'Alene and Moscow. Golden Greek won a first-place award at the American Cheese Society meeting in 2007. "It's been a fun cheese. People get really attached to it," said Ballard. Find local or imported versions of the "fun cheese" at Boise Co-op or at Thana's Little World Market at 4101 W. Overland Road. --Whitney Rearick FOOD/BEER GUZZLER BREAKFAST BREWS OK, they're not really for breakfast, but all three of this week's selections are coffee-infused porters. I'm not typically a fan of tricked-up beers, but a deeply flavored porter with a coffee element sounds like just the thing to beat back this icy winter weather. And while it might not be something I'd want to drink everyday, all three make for a nice change of pace. BIG SKY BREWING COWBOY COFFEE PORTER This beer pours an opaque ebony with a thin, dark tan head. It reminds me of a well-pulled espresso with a nice crema. The aromas are fairly light, colored by biscuit, coffee grounds, a touch of tobacco and mild mocha. On the palate, the coffee flavor is subdued, blending nicely with toasty malt, caramel and bittersweet chocolate. It's a well-balanced effort from this Missoula, Mont.-based brewery. BRIDGEPORT CAFE NEGRO COFFEE INFUSED PORTER From Portland, Ore.'s first craft brewery, this is another dark pour but with a thicker, more persistent froth. It smells like a creamy cappuccino with a nice shaving of dark chocolate. Again, the coffee element has a light presence, just coloring the smooth malt and lightly bitter hops that come through mostly on the finish. There's also a bit of a citrus tang along with hints of soft plum and cocoa. KONA PIPELINE PORTER This limited release from the Aloha State is brewed with 100 percent Kona coffee sourced from a neighboring plantation. It's dark brown in color with a thin froth that collapses quickly, while the aromas are a mix of light coffee and malt with an intriguing wood element. This beer is very smooth in the mouth and is laced with dry malt and herbal hops. While coffee sets the tone, it lurks mostly in the background. The finish echoes the flavors of a chocolatecovered espresso bean. --David Kirkpatrick 40 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M B O I S E W E E K LY R E A L ES TAT E BW ROOMMATES ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Roommates.com CLEAN ROOMIE-MOVE IN NOW Meridian, 1400 sq. ft. house, 3BD, 2BA, spare room avail. Single father, kids half the time. You would have your own room & bathroom. One dog & open to negotiating your dog. Util. paid. 401-6660. firstname.lastname@example.com IN MERIDIAN 2BD mobile home with W/D & DW. + 1/2 utilities & some help with transportation. Near freeway in Meridian. Smoking ok. $250/mo. Call Jon 353-7308. ROOMMATE WANTED To share a mobile home. $200/mo. for bedroom or $100/mo. for living room (w/hide-a-bed). Each option includes util. Occupant has a dog & cat. Smoking ok, but no drugs/ alcohol. About 2 blocks from bus stop. Dale 353-9787. VISIT | www.boiseweekly.com E-MAIL | email@example.com CALL | (208) 344-2055 ask for Jill OFFICE HOURS Monday-Friday 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. Out to Lunch 1:30 - 2:30 p.m. BW RENTALS 3131 Jordan. Clean & nice. New remodel. 850 sq. ft., 2BD, 1BA. $535/mo. Call Fred 384-0438. DOWNTOWN BOISE.1BD $490 & 2BD $490. 343-5476. DUPLEX 2BD, 2BA in quiet Cul-De-Sac. This duplex has a 2 car grg., private patio & yard. $700/mo. $200 dep. New Paint & carpet. W/D. No pets. Contact Jay for appt. 922-0888. Maple Grove/Ustick Area. GREAT LOCATION NEAR BSU 3BD, 1BA. 5 Blocks from the Student Union Building. $875/mo. for 6 mo. lease & $850 for a yr. lease. The kitchen & carpet are new. Large yard. W/S/T & yard maintenance included in rent. Available Feb. 1st. Call 761-4702. PERFECT LOCATION! Downtown/North End location! 2BD, 1BA, large deck, fenced yard, private back patio, W/D, W/S/T paid. $800/mo. 1st mo. move in special of $500/mo. for February. Deposit only $375! Great neighborhood and walking distance to downtown area. 208861-8050. BW FOR SALE FREE MONEY TO HOME BUYERS Did you know there are still programs & grants that give qualified/eligible buyers money toward a home purchase? There is no charge to see if you qualify & with prices at an all time low... you may end up paying less to own a home than what you pay for rent. No cost or obligation to apply! Homes in our area are at an all time low! If you have steady income, soso credit, and want to see what your options are call Heidi, Market Pro Realtor at 208-440-5997 or Krista at 208-860-1650. E-mail email@example.com What have you got to lose? Want a free list of area foreclosed home deals? Jump on www.ChallengerBoiseHomes.com. REAL ESTATE - COMMERCIAL PLACE AN AD MAILING ADDRESS P.O. Box 1657, Boise, ID 83701 OFFICE ADDRESS Boise Weekly's office is located at 523 Broad Street in downtown Boise. We are on the corner of 6th and Broad between Front and Myrtle streets. MIND, BODY, SPIRIT - YOGA PHONE (208) 344-2055 FAX (208) 342-4733 MIND, BODY, SPIRIT E-MAIL classified@boiseweekly. com DEADLINES* boise's organic skincare valentine's day is february 14, need a gift? COMMUNITY Facials and waxing By appointment only Gift certificates available �minence organic skincare products 1317 West Jefferson 208 344 5883 remedyskincareboise.com LINE ADS: Monday, 10 a.m. DISPLAY: Thursday, 3 p.m. * Some special issues and holiday issues may have earlier deadlines. RATES We are not afraid to admit that we are cheap, and easy, too! Call (208) 344-2055 and ask for classifieds. We think you'll agree. DISCLAIMER Claims of error must be made within 14 days of the date the ad appeared. Liability is limited to in-house credit equal to the cost of the ad's first insertion. Boise Weekly reserves the right to revise or reject any advertising. PAYMENT Classified advertising must be paid in advance unless approved credit terms are established. You may pay with credit card, cash, check or money order. WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly C L A S S I F I E D S | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 41 B O I S E W E E K LY MIND, BODY, SPIRIT BW MASSAGE A Full body massage by experienced therapist. Out call or private studio. 863-1577 Thomas. VISIT | www.boiseweekly.com E-MAIL | firstname.lastname@example.com CALL | (208) 344-2055 ask for Jill BOISE'S BEST! With Bodywork by Rose. 794-4789. www.roseshands.com Therapeutic Tantra Massage. By certified Tantrica. 440-4321. 1/2 hr. $15. FULL BODY. Hot oil, spa/showers, 24/7. I travel. 880-5772. massagebyeric.com. Male Only. Boise & Nampa studios. MASSAGE BY GINA Full Body Treatment/Relaxation, Pain Relief & Tension Release. Call 908-3383. *AMATEUR MASSAGE BY ERIC* COME EXPERIENCE MASSAGE BY SAM Hot tub available, heated table, hot oil full-body Swedish massage. Total seclusion. Days/ Eves/Weekends. Visa/Master Card accepted, Male only. 8662759. ULM 340-8377. F O R S A LE BW STUFF 9 Piece King Sleigh Bed Set Brand new. Dovetail drawers. List $2950. Sacrifice $799. 888-1464. Bed, Queen Tempurpedic Style Memory Foam Mattress. Brand new, w/warranty. Must sell $225. 921-6643. BEDROOM SET 7 pc. Cherry set. Brand new, still boxed. Retail $2250, Sacrifice $450. 888-1464. MIND, BODY, SPIRIT - MASSAGE BREATHALYZER SALE! $29.95, + Free Responsible Drinking Guide. Ships in 2 days! DontRuinYourLife.com 615-3695099. Couch & Loveseat - Microfiber. Stain Resistant. Lifetime Warranty. Brand new in boxes. List $1395. Must Sell $450! 8881464. FREE HD FOR LIFE! Only on DISH NETWORK. Lowest Price in America! $24.99/mo. for OVER 120 CHANNELS! PLUS-$550 Bonus! Call Today, 1-888-904-3558. KING SIZE PILLOW TOP MATTRESS SET. New - in bag, w/ warranty. MUST SELL $199. Call 921-6643. Leather Sofa plus Loveseat. Brand new in crate w/Lifetime warranty. Retail $2450. Sell $699! 888-1464. QUEEN PILLOWTOP MATTRESS SET. Brand new-still in plastic. Warranty. MUST SELL $139. Can deliver. 921-6643. FREE ON-LINE CLASSIFIED ADS Place your FREE on-line classifieds at www.boiseweekly.com. It's easy! Just click on "Post Your FREE Ad." No phone calls please. BW SHOP HERE PLACE AN AD BW ANTIQUES SHOP HERE MIND, BODY, SPIRIT - MASSAGE 42 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly C L A S S I F I E D S WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M VISIT | www.boiseweekly.com E-MAIL | email@example.com CALL | (208) 344-2055 ask for Jill PLACE AN AD B OISE W E E KLY Will pay CASH for furniture. 608 N. Orchard St. Call 331-2366. SARA'S SECONDHAND BW CAREER TRAINING & EDUCATION PETS BW PETS M US I C BW MUSIC INSTRUCTION VIOLIN & VIOLA LESSONS Offering private lessons in beginning and intermediate violin and viola. Classical, electric, traditional and non-traditional learning, beginning theory & ear training. Experience: B.A. in Music. E-mail or call for more details or with any questions. firstname.lastname@example.com 208-409-5846. C A RE E RS BW BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES ENTREPRENEUR HOME BUSINE$$ Executive level pay without executive level stress working part time from home. Call 800-556-5684. Web: www.myamerica100khomebusiness.com/ Healthcare, Graphic Arts, Technology, Business & Accounting. Financial Aid is available for qualified students. Day, Evening and online classes start next month. Stevens-Henager College, Boise Branch, 800-716-5645. www.stevenshenager.info FREE ON-LINE CLASSIFIED ADS Place your FREE on-line classifieds at www.boiseweekly.com. It's easy! Just click on "Post Your FREE Ad." No phone calls please. RIGHT SCHOOL, RIGHT DEGREE, RIGHT NOW! SWEET BOY TO GOOD HOME Hi! My name is Elvis, a one year old mix dog looking for a loving home. I'm often mistaken for a labradoodle but my current home calls me a Muppet Dog. I am sweet, affectionate, and love to play. My current owners got me as a companion for their older dog, but it turns out that I am a bit too much fun for her. I would do well with a family with kids or could be your hiking/ mountain biking/park/river buddy. I love other animals and I am not aggressive in the least- I just like to play! If you want to make me part of your family please call 208-908-1241. Thank you! BW INSTRUMENTS & EQUIPMENT ADOPT-A-PET These pets can be adopted at the Idaho Humane Society. www.idahohumanesociety.com 4775 W. Dorman St. Boise | 208-342-3508 CHASITY: One-year-old female grey and white domestic shorthair cat. Enjoys to be held. Good with dogs and cats. Litterbox-trained. (Kennel 107- #12311726) SPAGHETTI: Two-yearold spayed female, border collie and pit bull terrier. House-trained and playful. Knows some commands. (Kennel 311- #7775860) MATTIE: Four-year-old spayed female Siamese mix cat. Good with children, but fearful of dogs. Litterbox-trained, indoor cat. (Kennel 116#9324542) BUSTER: Three-year-old male Lab mix. Friendly, gentle on the leash, nice manners. Housetrained. Good with kids, cats and dogs. (Kennel 315- #12137149) JACK: One-year-old male domestic longhair cat. Litterbox-trained and enjoys belly rubs. Good with kids, cats and dogs. (Kennel 03#12341997) SOPHIA: Two-yearold female German shorthair pointer mix. House-trained, energetic dog. Knows basic commands. (Kennel 325- #12185223) WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly C L A S S I F I E D S | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 43 B O I S E W E E K LY BA RT E R BW HAVE SWAPCAFE.COM Come join us! Trade your stuff, your skills, your inventory. Submit via SwapCafe.Net for personal swaps or SwapCafe.Com for B2B. Good luck trading! Questions firstname.lastname@example.com VISIT | www.boiseweekly.com E-MAIL | email@example.com CALL | (208) 344-2055 ask for Jill PLACE AN AD T R A N SPO RTAT I O N BW 4 WHEELS 1969 CAMARO SS 350/300 hp, automatic transmission, A/C, power steering & brakes, asking $4900. Contact email@example.com / 208-4937084. EAT HERE NYT CROSSWORD | ACROSS 1 Rum, vodka and orange juice drink CIRCLE OF LIFE BY KEVIN G. DER AND JESSICA A. HUI / EDITED BY WILL SHORTZ 14 Costume party accessory 17 Pope after Marinus I 20 Trying 22 Turner of records 23 Felt like forever 24 Interludes 25 Cultural grp. 26 Viewable, to a camera operator 27 Author Marsh 29 EarthLink and others 30 Result of turning the corner? 31 Became annoyed 34 New England's Cape ___ 35 Roman 1,150 37 Detached 39 Public person? 12 13 14 22 25 29 35 41 50 54 55 61 66 67 72 80 85 81 86 91 92 100 104 111 115 119 129 130 136 141 137 138 120 131 116 121 122 123 124 105 106 112 93 94 73 82 87 74 75 62 63 51 56 36 37 42 38 43 44 30 15 16 7 "Little" barnyard bird with an alliterative name in a classic Willie Dixon blues song 11 "Let me think ..." 1 17 23 26 31 18 19 2 3 4 5 6 20 24 7 8 9 10 21 11 27 32 39 33 40 49 53 58 65 69 77 84 88 70 78 79 59 34 28 45 52 57 64 68 76 83 46 47 48 60 71 89 98 102 108 109 114 110 103 90 99 95 101 107 113 96 97 117 125 126 132 139 142 133 140 143 127 128 118 134 135 144 145 41 Pillow talk? 42 Cage in Hollywood 45 Fellowship foes 49 So-called "Heart of Texas" 50 Eschew 51 "See you then!" 52 Famous fiddler 53 Words to a traitor 54 Steering system parts 56 "___ bien" (Spanish for "It's good") 57 Bit of a muscle car's muscle 59 ___ Joe, "Tom Sawyer" character 61 Do-do connector 62 Looney Tunes character with a snout 64 Fashionista's concern 65 Abide 66 Surprise visitors 68 British isle 69 Suffix with torrent 71 Driller's letters 72 Poker declaration 73 Pound sound 76 Top-rated show of 2002-05 77 What the 41-Down has 82 Pooh's young pal 83 Mauna ___ 84 Land of Ephesians 85 When doubled, first name in old Hollywood 86 Spanish "that" 87 ___ system (way of classifying blood) 88 Most divine 90 Rattletrap 93 Cobra product 95 Cobra products 98 Ariz. neighbor 99 Swingers in a saloon 100 Person who likes the blues? 101 Mottled 102 Soldier's meal container 104 Very 106 Palliative plant 107 Winter Olympics performance since 1976 110 Den ___, Nederland 111 Ubangi tributary 112 Phalanx's weaknesses 113 Thinned out 114 Driller's letters 115 Facing, with "from" 117 Halved 118 Be shy 119 "What?!" 120 Serves 125 King Arthur's family name 127 Make out, in York 129 Old saw 131 With craft 132 Getup 133 Italian liqueurs 136 Strip in a darkroom 139 "The Lovely Bones" composer, 2009 140 Topic at an owners/ players meeting 141 Heyday 142 Source of enlightenment 143 Terminal 144 1960 Updike novel 145 Four-time Masters winner DOWN 1 Two-letter combinations 2 Continue, as an uncontrolled fire 3 Most common draw in Scrabble 4 Comic Caesar 5 Priory in "The Da Vinci Code" 6 Tomfoolery 7 City NNE of Tahoe 8 Bus. line 9 Patriotic women's org. 10 Wakes thrown up behind speedboats 11 Revealing 1970s wear 12 Cereal mixes 13 Ed.'s work pile 14 Portable red or white holder 15 Low-priced furniture source 16 Tent or sleeping bag, e.g. 17 Take ___ at (insult) 18 1962 action film set in Jamaica 19 Finnish transport? 20 Mark in marble 21 Suffix with rhythm 28 Whichever 30 Samaritans 32 Galley figure 33 State in French 35 Peeved pout 36 Hotelier Hilton 38 South American tuber 40 Be part of, as a film 41 Collection of animals featured in this puzzle 43 Lawyer: Abbr. 44 Fat underwater creature 45 Like a Mountie 46 Musical echo 47 Dalmatian's home 48 Like wild oats 50 Strong 51 Dumbness 55 Foppish courtier in "Hamlet" 58 It may be limited or late 60 Revelation comes after it 62 Doctor's orders 63 Away for a while 65 1985 John Malkovich drama 67 Reggie Miller, for one 70 People leaving the company? 73 Breakfast in a bar 74 High-tech officer in film 75 Hotel figures 78 Mortgage holder, e.g. 79 Florist's supply 80 Comparable in reach 81 "Hair" co-writer James 88 See 91-Down 89 Pilot program? 91 With 88-Down, 2000 Ang Lee film 92 One of the tribes of Israel 94 Online publication, for short 95 Place where a person may be bitten 96 Director Vittorio De ___ 97 Sticking with it 100 ___ number on (mentally abuses) L A S T 102 Noted Ronald 103 London tourist stop 105 Dull 108 Works at a museum 109 Blitzer, e.g. 114 Much-wanted toon in Toontown 115 Dumas's "La Dame ___ Cam�lias" 116 Combed (through) 119 Lock plate 121 Cobra products 122 Hindu deity 123 Designer Cassini 124 Nasdaq alternative 125 W. or J.F.K. 126 A, to Zimmermann 128 60 minuti 129 Grouse 130 ___ Mix 133 Enzyme ending 134 Norse war god 135 The Horned Frogs, for short 137 Mop & ___ 138 Something about nothing? Go to www.boiseweekly. com and look under extras for the answers to this week's puzzle. Don't think of it as cheating. Think of it more as simply double-checking your answers. A N S W E R S W E E K ' S T O T E M N S Y N C A R I S E U H A U L L I L T S S O C K E D I N D R A G T H E M E D C O M D R A N C A R O I D L B A R B E N A S T A M S A A G E S E E T C O M A N E N S A T T L S A V S C A A I S J L O O S L S E E E X Z I R I N A G G Y R A B B I V I R A L A D M I X E S A L A N S M A P S L E S W A H T T O W O W O C H A E P D M U S I C L U E I N G N D O D A P O O B U R N A S S E S H S U M P A Z R A D C X Q U O I T A N S I L I P A S P Y C H R U R R O R I E S I D D Y H I N T B M O V I E S S K E T E I L L A B A R R E C A O M S O M B P A I S T R D D P O D L W O A N G Y S E S D N A A R A R E P E T I S H A A N A S P O S O N I P C S P D I A R S I L A Y O D L E E W F S T O P I M E A N S T Y P E T E R N E 44 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly C L A S S I F I E D S WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. 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If you own a home & answered yes to any of these three questions you may be a candidate for a short sale of your home. Don't just walk away from your home!! This could lead to severe consequences to you in the future. Let us negotiate with your bank on your behalf & help you to unburden yourself! Unsure what your options are or how a short sale works? We offer a FREE consultation. Simply visit www. challengerboisehomes.com Click the Short Sale link to get started. There is no obligation, but we feel you deserve to know what options are available to you. We are fast to respond and helping our clients is our top priority! Krista 208-8601650 & Heidi 208-440-5997, Market Pro Real Estate. Your first and last stop for short sale help! BW CHAT LINES Real People, Real Chat, Real Hot! Call 208-287-0343. FREE w/code 5500. Call 800-210-1010. BW KISSES BARK N' PURR Welcome back! We missed you. Fido & Boots. DEAR SWEET LADY AT PAPA MURPHY'S....... on Fairview for picking up my $100 bill & giving it to the staff to hold! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And, thank you Papa Murphy's staff for holding it for me! FOR YOUR VALENTINE! Give your Guy or Girl the gift of a clean house for Valentine's Day. All natural products cleaning service. Kelligreen 830-1965. FRIEND You have been the bestest ever. I never want to live without you. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! T. Love you. GREEK GIRL Happy Valentine's Day my love. Together we can do anything. I love you. -J Kisses to GTD & Fleur. Happy VDay. To all my friends & family, I love you. Thanks for keeping me crazy. Much love, Shea. TO SAMMY. Love you long time. Happy V-day. Love, Stacy. Urban Nick, our dysFUNctionality aside, I love you. Thank you for being my BBPFBFF. CAREERS SERVICES - HOME CO NNE C T IO N SE C T IO N - AD ULT WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly C L A S S I F I E D S | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 45 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY ARIES (March 21-April 19): "Before I loved you, nothing was my own," wrote Pablo Neruda to his lover in one of his sonnets. "It all belonged to someone else--to no one." Have you ever experienced a sense of being dispossessed like that, Aries? A sense of there is nowhere and nothing in the world that you can call your own? And have you ever fantasized that your emptiness could be remedied by the intimate presence of a special companion? I wish for you to have that consoling experience in the coming week. In fact, I predict it. Happy Valentine's Daze! TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You're very familiar with the inexhaustible longings that you harbor. Your primal hungers for love and connection are never far from your awareness. But the sad thing is that you often regard this as a problem--as a vulnerability that disempowers you. This Valentine's season, I'm asking you to change all that. I'm urging you to see your enormous yearnings as strengths, to celebrate them as essential fuel for your vitality. Take it from someone who has seen too many people crippled by their lack of passion: You're lucky to be so well-endowed with desire. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Happy Valentine's Daze, Gemini! Here's my prescription for making the best use of the current cosmic currents: Be enchanting but in an understated way. Be slyly charismatic and innocently flirtatious and serenely wild. Show how sexy it is to be sublimely relaxed. Make judicious use of small acts of friendly mischief. Be affectionately unpredictable, always in the service of showing how much you care. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Your love story has elements of a farce mixed with a soap opera, fairy tale and ghost story. For a normal human being, it might be too intense and convoluted to deal with. It requires so much willing suspension of disbelief and involves so much letting go of certainty that no one in their right mind would agree to its demands. Luckily, you're not a normal human being these days, and you're not particularly in your right mind. That's why I say unto you: Ride this snaky tale for all it's worth. Enjoy every plot twist and riddle as if you've been given an epic myth you can ponder and learn from for the next 10 years. Happy Valentine's Daze, Cancerian! LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): "I think, therefore I am," declared the philosopher Descartes. Couldn't he have equally said, "I feel, therefore I am" or "I sense, therefore I am"? During this Valentine's season, I suggest that you put the emphasis on those other proofs of identity. From what I can tell, intimacy is most likely to thrive if you liberate it from excessive thinking and lubricate it with generous amounts of trans-rational contact. For love's sake, empty your head of abstractions, opinions and theories. Make lots of room for the aroma of freshly washed hair, the shimmer of peaceful excitement, the zing of poignant empathy and the telepathy of shared perceptions. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Happy Valentine's Daze, Virgo! In accordance with the astrological omens, here's a suggestion: Write haiku-like poems on scraps of red paper and leave them around for a special someone to find. You can borrow the following samples, adopted from the work of Raymond Roseliep. 1. "mist on my mouth--air you touched." 2. "I tried to bring you that one cloud in this cup of water." 3. "black raspberries--your name breaking in the soft burst." 4. "love song: I enter your mirror." To get more inspiration, check out tinyurl.com/brisk88. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Happy Valentine's Daze, Libra. It's my astrological opinion that you need more jokes, comedy and humor in your romantic adventures. If you're too serious about seeking the pleasures of love, you can't get what you want. To inspire your efforts, I present the winning entry from last year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. It was judged the worst possible opening line for a novel, but it's perfect fodder for the project I've assigned you: "For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity's affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss--a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity's mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world's thirstiest gerbil." SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): This Valentine's season, you have considerable potential to bring more lyricism into your close relationships. To stimulate you in that noble effort, I'm borrowing from the poetry of Andre Breton. See if you can adopt this style of expressing yourself (or steal the actual words) as you reach out to a person you'd like to be closer to: "Your neck is pearled barley. Your hair is a wood fire. Your mouth is a bouquet of stars. Your eyelashes are a child's first stroke of writing. Your eyebrows are the edge of a swallow's nest. Your shoulders are dolphins' heads under the ice. Your fingers? The ace of hearts. Your armpits? Beechnut and midsummer night. Your arms are the sea foam and flood gate foam. Your feet are bunches of keys." SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): "Love that stammers, that stutters, is apt to be the love that loves best," wrote poet Gabriela Mistral. That's an important theme to keep in mind during the season of amour. Your job as a lover is not to be inflated with the perfect knowledge of how to proceed, not to stride forcefully into each romantic nuance with your confidence exploding, but rather to stumble along humbly, waging experiment after experiment, striving to kindle the spark--or whatever the idiosyncratic truth of the moment calls for. Happy Valentine's Daze, Sagittarius! CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Happy Valentine's Daze, Capricorn! Borrowing words from poet Amy Lowell, I've created the nucleus of a love note for you to use as your own. Feel free to give these words (and others you write yourself) to a person whose destiny needs to be woven more intimately together with yours. "Your shadow is moonlight on a plate of silver; your footsteps, the seeding-place of lilies; the mystery of your voice, a chime of bells across the windless river air. The movement of your hands is the long golden running of light from a rising sun. Young horses are not more limber than your thoughts. Your laughs are bees buzzing around a pear tree. I dare to reach to you. I dare to touch the rim of your brightness." AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): When some Westerners hear the term "tantra," they think it's a New Age codeword for lavish sex. But in its original form, tantra is a philosophy that advocates spiritual union with all of creation, not just erotic union with an attractive partner. Tantric practitioners might engage in metaphorical "love-making" with lizards, birch trees, clouds, toasters, rivers and quirky friends, among other wonders. I recommend that you experiment with this perspective, Aquarius. I bet you'll find that cultivating lusty compassion for the entire world will enhance your personal intimacy with the people you care about. Happy Valentine's Daze! PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In many of the weddings I've been to as a guest, the love birds have sealed their vows with a chaste kiss--a formal gesture that wasn't imbued with much spontaneous passion. But in a recent marriage ceremony I attended, the new husband and wife showed little inhibition at the climax. They French-kissed in a prolonged embrace that also included ample groping. In the coming week, I urge you to put yourself as much as possible in situations where you can express that kind of free-wheeling spirit. Happy Valentine's Daze, Pisces! 46 | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | BOISEweekly WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M WWW. B OISEWEEKLY.C O M BOISEweekly | FEBRUARY 9�15, 2011 | 47