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The First Texian Macabre Arena Ballad (The extended free-fallen edition)
In another life, is where I first saw your face!
Summer, afternoon, lying wounded, next to the dead
Unopened gun powder, mass destruction in a land of disgrace
A blood thirsty battlefield, is where I first saw your face
The sound of war, hidden behind my hands that bled
Crawlers, rendering their lives upon the open space
Jaws of steel, broken, embracing the warm feeling
Summer rain, lungs of blood, their last dying post
Glorious by numbers, every blade was screaming
Gemstone losing touch, in touch with the Holy Ghost
Soldiers come in a little closer, as if they were only dreaming
Crawling, missing limbs, twisted nightmare with no ending
Macabre reminder, retracing the aroma of eternal life
Secrets buried like a treasure under the walls of sudden death
Revolutionary tears found on a rusted Bowie knife
Lanterns, crackling against every last dying breath,
Dirty piles of crashing wind pipes, and sudden death
Rummage like garbage, the dead Texian
A Falling Alamo Star, taking one last twinkle and dying breath
The Forgotten Patriots, I can't remember the names
Written on the wall, I can't remember the names
A folktale arena is where I first saw your face
The fairness of stuttered surrender slicing through iron brace
Crawling, with the hunger to live, a clean finish with grace
Exposing, scars needing mother's hands, and face
Across infested meadows, the aroma of burning skin.
Distant, before Texas and her annexation,
Gruesome, before I lived, Texas and her mortal sin
I pledge, my love, the honor, a legion, I'm a full blown Texian
To Every Forgotten Texian Patriot----- We Win!
Please pick me up!
Never mind I'm gonna fall, anyways
Please show me how to tie my shoes and sing a song!
Don't worry mommy, I'll walk barefoot and teach myself one day
Please daddy show me how to ride my bike!
Never mind It takes up too much of your time
Mommy, please do not hit me again!
It's okay, I need to be taught a lesson
Cousin please do not touch!
Go ahead, they won't believe me anyway
Teacher, please defend me in school!
Never mind, my body is used to the abuse
Please don't tell me sleeping with you is the only way!
Okay, I need to be loved even if it's for one night
Please teach me how to raise a baby!
It's okay, I can't blame others for my mistake
Please don't get violent when you drink tonight!'
If it makes you feel better hit me,
I'll hide the bruise with makeup & tears
Please tell me that I'm beautiful!
Wait! Your right I'll never look like her!
Please someone call 911!
Never mind, it's only a broken bone
Officer, please don't take my husband?
Don't you know it was my fault, he loves me and won't hit me again
Please don't ask what happen to my face!
That's what I get for standing up and defending myself
Please God don't take my baby!
Go ahead and take her I don't deserve her
Please don't tell me your not in love with me!
I understand I'll never be worthy of your heart
Please don't walk away and break my heart!
It's okay, I never made progress or was good enough
Please someone help, I'm hurting inside!
Never mind my feelings don't count
Please God, can you hear me!
Please God, can you rescue me!
Please God, can you walk with me!
Please God, can you show me the way!
God- I was a baby, I was weak, and did not talk
God- you didn't protect me on my first fall
God- I was abandoned and neglected before I learned to crawl!
God- even you rejected all my prayers and call
I understand now I don't need nothing!
I don't need no one at ALL
So PLEASE, PLEASE leave me alone, behind these walls
. **
Please! If you read this teach me how to smile
WAIT! Smiles don't come with self blame & guilt
My favorite cousin named Marge
is almost as big as a barge.
So one would assume,
not knowing the groom,
the guy would most likely be large.
But he was a small man named Tim
"As thin as a broom" describes him.
While Marge would guffaw,
Tim would watch her with awe
and just smile for he was so prim!
When the preacher addressed him and said,
"You may now kiss the bride," Tim turned red,
for their lips could not meet.
With high heels on her feet,
Marge stood towering over his head.
She leaned down while Tim stood on his toes,
but for being in such a strange pose,
Marge then came toppling down
crushing Tim neath her gown
while the whole church erupted in "Ohhhhh's."
All was well, and thereafter, we ate;
then we planned next to dance until late.
But none could foresee
the small tragedy
that had us all leaving by eight!
Marge had tossed off her heels for a glide
on the dance floor, but when they both tried
to dance, Tim got snagged
by that dang gown and dragged
as his bride was beginning to slide. . .
Now shoeless, poor Marge could not stop.
Toward a table with candles on top,
they slid, and the groom
then set fire to the room
by landing with a belly flop.
Poor Tim by the candles got lit,
and we were all having a fit,
for the fire got spread fast
till the Best Man at last
got us all wet extinguishing it!
Inspired by the title of the movie: My Big Fat Greek Wedding
& : Joann Grisetti's "My Cousin's Wedding" Poetry contest
His lifeboat drifted aimless; scorching days and chill of night,
with no hope of rescue within his dizzying, blurred sight.
Hunger gripped his belly in long piercing pangs.
Deprived; life giving liquid, his body, now was drained.
He'd heard stories of both, the devil and Jesus man.
Simply disregarding them; he never took a stand.
"God help me"; empty words repeated in desperation.
No manna dropped from heaven, nor miracle hydration.
Feeling shunned by the one, he called upon the other,
" I'd give my soul for a crumb and a thimble of fresh water."
Parting the curtain of fog, stretched an ancient taloned hand.
"Give yourself to me, and I'll gladly meet your demands."
The devil's seductive voice; at first music to his ears.
We'll feast on souls of nonbelievers, and drink their desperate tears.
Beckoning him from port side, slowly starboard his head turned.
The devil's real, then so is Jesus; his latest lesson learned.
Squeezing his last drop of strength, he managed to his knees.
Through blood stained lips, the sinners prayer; "Father, forgive me, please."
These dying words, barely uttered, he stood at heaven's gate.
My God is a merciful God... Repent... It's never too late....
The Tumid River of Acheron (the journey) Part 1
Dark the tumid, rushing waters flow
where man most wisely fears to go
Liquid blackness sings of epic pain
torture, misery and cries of insane
Echoes of evil Eperius in the West
shadow realm where evil never rests
Black ship of Kharon eternally sail
into the sunless land of a dark hell
Land those lost , family and friend
exists for all wicked women and men
Black abyss where Apollo never walks
lost souls ripped by screeching hawks
Forever filled by rowboat conveyed
miserable, crying souls are relayed
Crossing the tarn of Acheron then
cursing future torments for all men
Seething waters set to ever separate
those lost into future tortured Fate
Father of evil waters from which sprang
the Styx of which man's curses rang
Flowing stream holding back evil foul
where tortured spirits scream and howl
Acheron, into a lake of scorching heat
where demons play with souls they eat
Delivered shadows fall on prayers cast
vanity briefly soothes, forever lasts
Prayers sinking like river cast stones
dreams birthed from dead skin and bones
Waters that wrap around Haides evil realm
with Daimon, the dark Lord at the helm
Gushing forth from the bowels of rock
mighty blackened waters rise to shock
Upon its moving mass of wretched stink
poison so lethal no mortal man may drink
Kharon, the ferryman awaits at the oars
to deliver the lost upon evil's shores
Far below the path of Mariandyni coast
the Acheron ferries victims to its host
Loaded with spirits of cries and moans
Kharon laughs at all the misery groans
From the south shore of the black sea
in sun's light never again will they be
Many are the tales of Acheron's fame
its victims steeped in sin and shame
Anguish rises as dark waters deliver
the wretched lost to painfully quiver
In this dark abhorrent , torturing Hell
those embracing lustful sin into evil fell
Robert J. Lindley, 09-13-2014
note: This is part one. The journey into HAIDES
by way of crossing the Styx. The river Styx is
actually an off shoot of Acheron that splits into
the Styx and the Cocytus.
Part two now has two lines written. It will be titled ,
Haides and Tormented Souls (the Dwelling)..
I have no preset limit to the second part, may be
longer or shorter. I suspect it will be even longer.
I hope the readers enjoy this write. I wanted to do
something dark and move away from all my love, romance
and Nature writes. A bit of variety to stir my
Things begin turning around and very
slowly they take a nasty foreboding twist
as Hell's Dragon has not breathed yet
a deep burning fire melting red his eyes
dripping blood upon fury and destruction
pumping inside the uncontrollable fire
equal to that of a thousand steamboats
and only he sleeps in the dark dungeons.
Chained and suffering in utter Hellfire
chained in untold torment and anguish
unleashed he would burn your heart no less
in a flash—while scorching all to nothingness
fried black from the deepest ashes falling
cold silently sleeping with wings on fire and
chained to love's weakness as the dark fables say:
Do Not Call Upon This Beast—He's The Devil's Own.
Hell's Dragon stirs inside with tongues of flames
lashing with the pains of hate to strike all now
leaving hottest cinders and funeral pyres a plenty
it's now the Devil's very moment to unleash His Evil,
His Demon Dragon upon the saintly and the pure
and the precious doing their good works and all
and unsuspecting of the malevolence awaiting them.
The Devil enters afresh the earthly plane once more and
releases His Dragon to inflict harm and to upset
God's celestial equation of peace, harmony, and light—
bringing death, destruction, and retribution to all in
its flight path while breathing out the harshest and
cruelest and hottest flames of fiery perfidy in the
name of Lucifer—Himself laughing boisterously at God
all the while not knowing the coming angelic answer.
The Almighty Lord works indeed in the most mysterious
of ways and He will not let his Fallen Angel Lucifer (or
"The Devil" on Earth) have His way by murdering
innocents through His Dragon proxy only too willing to
serve His Master to bring horrible hideous death to all
of mankind who fall within its flight path and intention
to inflict the most treacherous and dastardly plan of
of unmitigated death and horror ever to be unleashed.
Continued burning flesh 2
Liam McDaid and Gary Bateman – A Collaborated Poem,
Copyright © All Rights Reserved (November 28, 2014)
(Free Verse poetic format)
Plea From A Dark Soul
Weep not in the sun for me
my wasted life spent in vain
by death I did flee,
all but my shadow dwelt in pain
Utter not proud words for me
years of drunken whoring feasts
by death I did flee,
feeling no love, set loose my beasts
Deny not the fate I did earn
in my own just Hell to endure
by death I so return,
leaving a black heart so impure
Cry not over my burial urn
my deeds harvested bitter fruits
by death I so return,
to languish in my dark roots!
Robert J. Lindley 11-09-2014
note: Written from a dream, rather a nightmare that I had recently. As the darkness closed in the screams grew louder, the pain stronger and the heartaches
shouted for more agony.. Singe this sinner's hide with pain
that makes the angels cry..
A voice speaks out, tis only the start , we have ages and ages to increase
the torment and pain.
Time serves us this sweet delight , this lost soul now lives within our eternal night!
Quote for perspective--
Poetry is a bowl of cereal and if you are nice you get to add milk and a spoon.
author, Robert Lindley
Rescued From Death's Bed
The angel touched her heart then
turned her away from mortal men
Setting her course to sleep alone
in a cavern where no light shown
Yet she travelled in nightly dreams
to shining lands with epic streams
Upon which hardy men sailed away
making fortunes wherever they may
Lonely travellers so far from home
missing love as they set to roam
Dreams of beautiful vixens at night
saw her appear glowing in her light
First she could see but not speak
a silent image their heart did seek
As the sad years flew swiftly by
her words appeared telling men why
Her punishment was for her misdeed
an unfaithful lover she cut to bleed
Watch him bleed life into the dust
never again was she to ever trust
Avenging angel sent to punish then
keep her away from all mortal men
For her beauty could sway any heart
to find her a map drawn on a chart
Hundreds tried but nobody did win
free her from the cavern of her sin
As her broken heart started to fall
she heard a brave sea captain call
Map he had memorized just to find
the image that appeared in his mind
Into the dark lost lake he did sail
his love swore that he'd never fail
Moon was full bright when he arrived
to elude her guards he had contrived
Plan to lure her terrible guards away
rescue her before the break of day
Her guards were two dragons fierce
with scales no weapon could pierce
Captain would flash powder to blind
their eyes as in he went in to find
All went just as was his bold plan
out the cavern he and his love ran
Soon two lovers were aboard his ship
dragon guards they managed to slip
Sun rose, she saw a dead lover's face
back to death his soul had to race
For the captain was her victim bled
freed her from his dark death's bed!
Robert J. Lindley, 09-17-2014
All that I had, just yesterday
Has suddenly, been taken away
Me yes me, a foolish man of clay
Suddenly I have so much to say
When instead, I'd be wise to pray
Why oh why, me oh my
Take me now I want to die
I liked it better, when I was perched on high
My wings were strong, I loved to fly
I was given much, I gave no thanks
I sat upon lush river banks
My ship majestic, I watched as it sank
Now this world seems cold and dank
My cup was full it over flowed
Yet gratitude I barely showed
Instead of narrow, I chose wider road
My love of self it barely slowed
If only I had seen more clear
I wonder if I'd now be here
Feeling alone and filled with fear
Oh please dear God, I need you near
I heard him say, I'm sorry son
Your life is over, now it's done
You chose your god, I wasn't the one
Love of plenty and pleasured fun!
So down to Hell my soul is brought
A place of pain both cold and hot
My insides squeezed inside a knot
Now what I treasured doesn't mean a lot
From this nightmare, I thankfully awake
My soul and being begin to shake
Please Lord forgive me, my mistake
Help me learn to give, instead of take!
I try to be thankful every day
With God's help, stay on the narrow way
It's not about me and that's okay
Vision much clearer, when to Jesus I pray.
This poem was inspired by my brother Roy.
He sent an email that asked "What if you only woke up with what you said
thanks for yesterday?" what a great question!
Sitting dying alone,
In this dark and dingy place
It has now become my home..
The only open bar
In town, I needed something to heal my broken heart
I'm on my 8th round, Going on Nine now!
Swaying on this broken bar stool
As the bartender shouts
his "last call", As I'm looking down
and this shuffled ground
As I try a re step my footsteps home
Walking them back In my head
But I'm a stumbling mess
My heart feels like shattering glass
I'm slowly breaking,
Sink-in, Drown-in in the dark-nest
I'm Gasp-in, For breath, Each one Hard-er
than the next!
While the whole world around me are breathing
Fine, I'm falling back into the abyss,
Broken heart-ed
This vodka has cut my skin so deep
This broken glass with it's hard edges
Digging, Silting into me
Tho some of my pain was self inflicting
My heart's beat, is barely beating
That's why I'm drinking
This gin
Now swallowed, why cant I
swallow my pride With
Dignity, I'm openly seeking darkness
I'm sorry farther "For I have sinned"
Those sin's I've harbored
Now my hollowed soul's giving In
To that darkness....
My body trembling ,The outcome's looking bleak
I've become so weak
Shaking knees, I can barely stand up
My eye's become teary
They say its this alcohol that's depressing me
But it's soon becoming my dependency
I'm finding hard to leave it be, I'm hooked....
...To a drip, Anything so I can get my fix
It's another chapter I've my book
That''s needs to be ripped, Apart
Because I'm hiding be-hide a mask
My face is smiling but inside my heart is scared..
I'm writing this at night
I'm tired... but my mind's racing fast
while my eyes are wide shut
I'm Trying to sleep..but my mind's
Not giving up..whilst
I'm lying on my friends sofa
I'm unable to get up
Morning rises but I'm slowly dying..
I'm hung over
Pondering on my life and wondering
what it would be like being sober
How can I achieve anything in life
When my only motivation is getting high
And the other half of the time
I'm crying inside
Too depressed to write
But I wipe my tears
But I'm still here, On my bar stool from 9 to 5!
The same broken record playing
Saying "I'm going to quit" But I'm not facing
My problems to begin with, I need a Fixative
I'm not telling myself I got a problem to be able to fix it!
Sitting here, Ripping the label off this toxic beer, bottle
I can't look at look at this mirror and face him!
Face it you hit rock bottom...
I cant believe what I have become
I wake up drunk
Where will I end up?
As I look along, A sedimentary I come a pone, A grave with my name above...
As the bar door's are now closing
My heart's ripped open Soaking
In pure emotion
Bartender "Give me two more shots"
And ill mend my way's
Not before a quick pit stop
To get more drink from this shop
Because I'm getting sick of these sad song's that play
From the broken jukebox!
Or this it me?
And my pain that's eternal bleeding
Thinking that every sad song is talking to me?
I'm leaving..
Because I'm lonely
I wonder if anyone get's me?
The feeling of looking back hopelessly
At the bottom of the vodka bottle
Describing my feelings of feeling empty!
I've been here before so it can't be rock bottom
The only thing I adore
Is my trusty red Pen that's my Savior
It's a metaphor...it's my blood, That's in its ink
When it hit's the paper
It's that pain, I'm writing with!
Because that inspiration's bleeds through my veins
Just for me to scribble to words on this page
Just so I can throw them away!
Because I think anything I ever do
Is not good enough for you..
Maybe I should do, More before I get taken away
Maybe if that ambulance had been late
I wouldn't been standing here today
But I still cant make that change
Because My vision, Impaired by the flashing lights
Of that ambulance
So If I die, today
At least they couldn't say
He was just an addict
Who abused his talent...
But I'm still here I tried To drown My
But I'm Drowning In tear's That I'll cry
How can one man find
More faith in a crevasse of Siula Grande,
Than most will ever know,
Sitting beneath a pulpit on Sunday?
Dulling the truth to grow the census,
Merchants and cowards comfort the carnal ear.
Marketing Christ's love without his conviction,
Left willful in sin with nothing to fear.
In half doctrines and custom alter calls,
Prostituting the truth with all forms of prosperity.
Akin to seeding hookers in the chambers of Heaven.
Deceived to death twice by hand and blasphemy.
Feeding wolves from among your own flocks.
In the banquets of ancient mystics and bride Blavatsky,
Word of Faith gorging on their mammon,
Left choking in an insatiable eternity.
A culture's blue concessions are gone,
Giving more choices leaving Paul's letters unread.
No church discipline or discernment left,
Testaments of burning flesh that once bled.
Refusing to submit to be broken.
Fading old blessings from past obedience.
Confusing favor with common grace,
Hypocrisy's retribution birthed decadence.
Millions claiming the found life of the few,
In every eulogy and requiem,
Lukewarm afterthoughts of the Son,
Losing everything by never knowing him.
Despising the light of the living truth,
Lobotomizing guilt with the scalpel of ignorance.
Finding solace in the darkness of mystery.
Death marches infectious rainbows of tolerance.
Redefining roles and covenants in hemorrhaging lies
Under the pretense of the modern states,
Illusions of enlightenment killing somatic slaves.
Relativism's heart courting the things he hates.
Enticed by the delusions of utopias,
Bound in the fables of autonomy.
Throats upon The two-edged sword,
In this American tragedy
This poem attempts to capture the Fundamentalist view on certain issues with other movements within Christianity. Also, the man in the crevasse, chose a different kind of faith than you may have assumed.
The year 1890
December 29th
Wounded Knee, South Dakota
My tribe lost their lives
The USS 7th
On their orders so
To round up the Sioux
Railroad herd them and go
Us Lakota were next
To disarm their request
But my cousin Black Coyote
At best he was deaf
Not hearing the orders
To lay down our guns
A chain reaction
Ensued on my tribal ones
Chaos and mayhem
Distressed our grounds
This proud nation
Beaten down
Men, women and children
300 slain
Another reminder
For the white mans gain
To disrespect the fallen
Slows our souls to our gods
We were left in a blizzard
Hardened like logs
In three days we rose
Civilians did lift
And dumped us unceremoniously
In a hole in the drift
My corpse and my peoples
Stripped and robbed
As flakes of snow
Confirm our spirits have sobbed
As i am reborn again
In another country
It gives me the freedom
To look back and see
That December day in 1890
Gunning down innocent ones
Not so mighty
The Medal of Honor
In their distinguished past
The record still stands
On their chests they flash
But attitudes change
As two centuries pass
The Medal Of Honor
Has won back its class
No longer the weak
Gunned down by the strong
Its man against man
Sometimes they do wrong
So as i sit back in my adopted nation
Will i live again past this lives station
Writing the wrongs of modern man
This Lakota warrior who never ran
Jesus Christ Has the Power Over Any Addiction!
I often hear of people who battle addictions.
This often leaves many scars and afflictions.
There's counselors to help, "a dime a dozen."
Their patient could be a friend or a cousin.
As many battle lives filled with "pollution."
But too often, God is left out of the solution.
Many who need help are given little help at best.
Why they cope with fear, anxiety and stress.
The one who can help the most, is often left out.
As many miss what the real hope of life is about!
The very God who created mankind, knows all about us!
He sent his son Jesus, because he loves us!
We can trust him for his cleansing power!
He can meet every need! This very hour!
If you're battling an addiction and are losing!
Won't you let God be the one that you're choosing?
He's powerful! And wants to help you so much!
Your life can be forever changed! By his touch!
Come one and all! Your needs, God shall supply!
Come and drink of his water which shall satisfy!
The sins and scars can be a thing of the past!
As you enjoy an abundant life, that'll always last!
The painful addictions can be healed this moment!
By the power and resurrection of Christ' atonement!
NOW can be time to lay your worries beneath him!
God shall restore those who diligently seek him!
Glory to Jesus! The victory's already been won!
All honor and praise to God's anointed one!
By Jim Pemberton 08/22/14
Some friends aren't forever
This is as far as we go
We'll exchange dishonest smiles
Ignoring what we both know
You'll say "See you later", one last time
You'll give me your number, and I'll give you mine
but we won't call and we won't meet
though you think I'm funny and I think you're sweet
Your company has done me good
We've talked much longer than we should
From the dark a face watches, the shades are drawn
my home life waits with the porch light on
and the gloom of "if" will hide the track
the many miles that I walk back
While I passed through the flame
Because I felt I had nothing to defend
Sorry I gave you the blame
I felt if only I had more
my life will be a heaven on earth
and my haters would see me soar
I'm now like a scarecrow in a shirt
The people who truly cared
away I scared
with my rantings
and fault findings
I'm sorry I was always the first to cast a stone
If only poetry mends hearts
I hope it adds this kiss I've blown
Christ Jesus our Savior is waiting for you.
His door stands open wide.
Won't you accept His invitation,
to come and walk inside.
It's sinner's like you and me,
He gave His life to save.
Not one of us is worthy,
but our sins were covered at His grave.
And don't think good people go to heaven.
Because not one of us is good enough,
despite the good deeds that we do,
we're still all sinner's, through and through!
Yet, His saving grace is there for us.
No matter where we are,
or what we've done,
His arms reach out to everyone.
There is no entrance fee to pay.
Just say, Lord Jesus, show me The Way.
And when you enter into God's open door,
you'll hear all heaven's welcome roar.
~The Fallen Star~
(Free Verse)
I can't still believe that millions have fallen and fall for all those lies,
Yes, I am very aware that Satan's ways and bag of tricks, are too many, just to count
He's the greatest liar and traitor that ever has lived and sin has produced
Once, he'd it all but for greed and pride he betrayed his own Creator God
Satan never stops deceiving us all, I can tell you that
He's always on the move, roaming around the whole earth,
Seeking new souls to pervert and steer them stray and send away
Forever and ever from the Glorious Kingdom of God and its Creator
He accuse us all in front of God and sneers at us laughing when we sin
Satan is the great deceiver, hate us all and we should always send him away
When he tempted us he just knows how to push our buttons in the right way
This angel of perdition gives us the world but in the end we may lose our very souls
Satan's ways are just too much to pay for, what's the use of having it all here, if we lose our precious soul and eternity
In God's glorious kingdom that's Heaven, for you see, Satan the great deceiver of all, already knows that God has won!
Dorian Petersen Potter
aka ladydp2000
~Important note from the author~
For more information you can always read these passages in the Holy Scriptures: (Satan fall from Heaven) Isaih 14:12-15 ~ (Satan the accuser) Job 1:12 ~ (Satan the tempter) 1 Thessalonians 3:5 ~ (Satan's destiny)Romans 16:20 ~
Where shall I begin? We fool around with
the dollars we spin, afraid of being saved
since we're guilty of living a Life of sin and
in the Godless times we all Live in its no
wonder Why we don't believe in God and
never allow the Lord to enter in.
We instead hide behind dark Powers to avoid
salvation, it's like we're angels with broken wings
fighting for Peace and love from within But how can
we be perfect in a world of temptation.
I was born in sin and in sin did my mother conceive me;
I wallowed in my iniquities and allowed satan to deceive me.
I hurried out to do things which were not just and right;
Occasionally they were done during the day, but mostly at night.
It wasn't because I was ashamed, that's just when friends got together;
We'd party and have a good time no matter what the weather.
We dress for the occasion and stayed out all night long;
We were hard hearted and not listening to our parents sayng we were wrong.
We knew what we were doing and was gonna do it our way;
It did not matter what people would think or what they had to say.
Then one day the Lord pricked my stony heart;
He said the ones I was hanging with, it was time for me to depart.
He said; "Come out from among them and be ye separated;
Abide in Me and I in you and be ye elevated."
"Lay aside every weight and the sin which so easily besets you,
My Lord said; "Listen to the words of your Father before satan gets you."
Now I had a race to run, I was running for my life,
I wanted to be full of the Holy Spirit with a mind like Jesus Christ.
So I hurried out to do thngs which were just and right,
Mostly I did them during the day, occasionally at night.
I was not ashamed when friends saw me or we got together,
Only we would praise the Lord and have a good time no matter what the weather.
We would dress for the occasion and shout all the day long,
Our hearts were happy as we listen to God's Word and gave up the wrong.
The Lord purged me from iniquities,
No longer did I live in sin.
Satan could not deceive me becaused I believed;
The chiselled talons of soulless sane,
With crooked claw of judgement bane,
That in the glare of beaded tell,
Seizes the cries where innocents dwell.
Whose shadows are dust in plumage stained,
The ashes of merciless reign.
Where crowned in glory of thorned rose,
They'll seat the throne of headless woes,
The guardians of the fallen ten,
The service of shadow less men.
I knelt to pray the other day
To give the Lord my sins away
But held within a secret sin
A sin that caused me pain to say
A secret sin I held within
As I began to pray....
And, trying there my soul to bare
I slowly came to be aware
That painful sin I held within
Had kept the Lord away somewhere
And it was then my secret sin
Became much easier to share.
And so once more I did implore
My loving Lord my peace restored
And gave that sin I held within
As I had always done before
And that is when my secret sin
Became that painful sin,
... no more.
Timothy I. Brumley
My cousin shared her wishes and dreams,
On our star gazing night, she whispered them so sweet
As a shooting star glided down from the sky,
She said, I wish ….. I wish…. all I wish are these tonight
Someday, I will marry a smart, rich and handsome guy
And have a grandiose banquet on my nuptial rite
We'll be dancing like a lovely prince and princess ,
With all my wedding sponsors on their best suits and dresses
All in pink ,that's the motif I will surely request.
She kept into her dreams as several years passed by,
Still searching for her prince charming who's hard to find
Unconsciously going beyond the age to give birth to a child,
In a hurry at age of seventy, she took a rich ninety years old guy.
The wedding was held after a day or two,
The guy seated on his wheelchair with rheumatism on his toe
She headed slowly at the alter to accept his shaking hands,
Two nurses followed, so with sponsors dressed up in printed brown.
The highlight of the wedding rite started at once,
They held tightly with a nebulizers on the other hands,
But the words of oath, they took time to pronounce
False teeth were both misplaced and nowhere to be found.
Reception followed grandiosely in the guy's mansion,
I saw many old men and women still eager to dance on the floor,
With hunched back, shaking knees, they twisted rock and roll
Then, sweet music played and my cousin danced with her groom.
But, we all wondered how did he stand alone?
He's so heavy , I knew my cousin couldn't help him at all,
With our great surprise, his nurse was at his side like his crutch
Everyone thought , he's really a smart guy! Was he not?
Then, everyone followed them so happily on the spacious hall,
And in trio, they held each other so tight and moved like a fool.
Written: Sept. 15, 2012
First Place
Contest: My Cousin's Wedding (funny poem)
Contest Judged: 9/30/2012
Poet Sponsor: Joann Grisetti
as gentle as a summer breeze
my love it begs you on it's knees
as soft as fur on those that purr
i whisper in your ear sweet words
as sweet as berries on your tongue
inside your heart a bell is rung
as sure as change is bound to come
an undying love my heart is won
as loud as thunder my heart wonders
can your love be really true
as vain as pain which i have gained
my worries about what she'd do
as wrong as sin not trusting begins
and rumors start flying from mouths of friends
as soon as one cracks with a terrible act
then ferocity and raging comes in
as you are standing on the side of me
no distance is aware of my resistance
as heart forgets its rhythm, my sighs do long to touch
emotions prevail this longing unravels my senses
as to, dare i say, how much a single touch awakens me?
a love so pure as this I have not known
as i trust your arms to teach me of this love
i no longer hear the gossip or the whispers
as you take my breath away on winds of change
a true blue sky above the color of our love
as it casts a light into your eyes and anchor mine
if this be sin then let me cast away my stone
as for my soul it is willing to pay the highest price
god has cast a dye our love is not to be denied
come lover hold me tight, long into the night.
Written by: Vienna Bombardieri & John H. Loving III Dec. 04, 2011
When I was just a little girl
With mind as always, in a whirl
Me and my cousin, we would roam
Far, far away from my sweet home
We'd make our way to some rocks we knew
All covered by green moss, we two
Oh it was such a magic place
And left huge smiles upon my face
To us it was a fairyland
With imagination vast and grand
We both saw fairies, little elves too
Dancing daintily as they do
When that time came, we had to leave
Both our little hearts would grieve
We'd leave that haven, her and me
Our minds brim filled with memories
So we went back to normalcy
And though it made us both unhappy
We knew that soon we'd go back there
And see those we folk everywhere
It was really a simple thing
Four chains holding a large plank
Suspended from the ceiling
A big blue swing
Summer at its peak
Heat touching 45 degrees
Cousins all crammed up
On a large blue swing
Listening to granny's stories
The distant fan slowly whirring
Laughing and giggling at nothing
On a large blue swing
Plate in hand my brother would sit at its end
Pretending to drive an airplane
Never knew planes did not have steering
On the large blue swing
Sometimes when no one was around
I'd sit on it with outstretched hands
Barely touching both its ends yet feeling like a queen
On a large blue swing
With my favourite cousin sometimes I'd sit
Munching hot salted peanuts
Pouring out our deepest secrets
On a large blue swing
At noon in granny's lap I'd lie
And listen to her lullaby
Soon asleep, without a worry in life
On a large blue swing
Like the swing her hopes never ran high
She spoke to me of days gone by
Looking beautiful, despite a toothless smile
On a large blue swing.
Today it is no more there
With grandma it slowly passed away
But memories still remain
On the large blue swing.


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- Busty and very hot Euro babe with huge natural racks is playing with her tight wet pussy using her huge dildo that she lubed as she sucks her toy and blows it like a real hard cock

subset: commoncrawl


text:
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Pull your toe to stop cramp, ride a bike to beat a cold: How doctors cure their own ills
They say you should practise what you preach. So when it comes to avoiding — or tackling — those niggling health problems, what do the experts do?
Gentle exercise helps a cold - when you exercise you use the whole chest and clear the upper airways, claims a leading immunologist
Eating fatty food is a common cause of indigestion because it slows down the emptying of the stomach and causes contraction of the lower part of the bowel. 'I'm very conscious of the amount of fat in food,' says Dr Nick Read, gastroenterologist and medical adviser to the IBS Network. 'I don't eat red meat and never have ready-meals, as they can be trouble.'
For the same reason, Dr Read is also careful when he goes to restaurants: 'I tend to have one or two starters — the main course in restaurants is usually too fatty.'
He also avoids going out for dinner when he's particularly busy: stress can cause the stomach to produce more acid, which can splash up into the gullet, causing heartburn. So, too, can alcohol.
And to banish night-time wind and bloating, he gives his tummy a pat.
'Sometimes I wake up feeling very aware of gas being produced,' he says. 'I just pat my tummy low down on the right hand side — which is the part of the large intestine that holds the gas — until it passes and I go to sleep again.'
Dr Hilary Longhurst, consultant immunologist at Barts NHS Trust, gets only one or two colds a year, but when the sniffles hit, her solution is to get moving.
'Gentle exercise is helpful — it blows away the gunk. When you're bunged up, you tend only to use the top of the chest while breathing. But when you exercise you use the whole chest and clear the upper airways, coughing up or swallowing the mucus.
'Exercise also releases endorphins, which help lift the malaise you get with a cold. So I get on my bike and cycle to work. But I'd do admin rather than see patients, so as not to pass the cold on.'
However, if you also have a fever, which indicates the infection is more widespread, it's best not to exhaust yourself with exercise as your immune system may be diverted from fighting the bug, she adds. And to ward off an emerging cold before it's hit, the immunologist tucks into oranges.
'I've been told the orange colour in fresh orange contains a chemical that will deter rhinovirus, a very common virus that causes colds,' she says. 'It won't work for every cold, but I find it helpful.'
His seven-month-old son often wakes him at night, but Dr Guy Meadows, clinical director of The Sleep School, a West London clinic, drifts off again by practising 'mindfulness'.
It's a technique that focuses on the present — as he explains: 'I notice the movement of my breath, the sheets touching my toes, and anything I can feel physically.'
This pushes day-to-day worries out of his mind, so he can go back to sleep more easily.
At bedtime, a few things help ensure a good night's sleep.
'Make sure the bedroom's dark and the bed's comfortable — we use lots of sheets and blankets rather than a duvet. With multiple sheets you can change the temperature quickly by removing or adding a layer when needed.'
Keeping your memory sharp involves making certain lifestyle choices, particularly in relation to food, says Dr Sandrine Thuret, head of the neurogenesis and mental health laboratory at the Institute of Psychiatry, King's College London.
'There are specific neurons — brain cells that communicate with each other — involved in memory. The more you have of these neurons, the better your memory will be.
'Recent research shows it's possible to create more in adulthood,' she says.
'Diet has a huge impact. I try to do intermittent fasting. Every other day I'll just have a light breakfast and a very light dinner — about 600 calories in total — although often it's because I'm too busy for lunch.
Restful: Use lots of sheets and blankets rather than a duvet to ensure a good night's sleep
'Studies show that if healthy people reduce their calorie intake by about 30 per cent and increase time between meals, it improves their memory by helping create more of these neurons, although we don't yet know why.
'I also have fish such as salmon — full of omega-3 fatty acids —every other day, and keep fresh blueberries in my fridge. The flavonoids they contain are good for memory.
'Exercise has a dramatic effect on these neurons, too, so every other day I run to work and back — about eight miles.'
When physiotherapist Sammy Margo suffers from the searing pain of cramp, she pulls her big toe and eats more bananas.
'Although we don't know exactly what causes cramp, it could be related to circulation. The feet are at the end of the body, so the blood has further to travel, which may be why feet are more prone to it.
'When it happens, I crouch and pull my big toe up towards me as hard as I can for 15 seconds to stretch out my foot fully. Then I put my weight on my foot again to see if the pain's gone. I repeat until it subsides.
'If I'm still getting cramp after that, I know I need to drink more water and eat more bananas, which contain magnesium and potassium. Magnesium can help relax muscles, and potassium helps with muscle function.'
Few women are completely immune to the stomach cramps and irritability that can hit each month.
Dr Dharani Hapangama, a consultant gynaecologist and research adviser to the Wellbeing of Women charity, found the bloating typically associated with PMS to be heightened when she was pregnant, because such symptoms are due to higher levels of the hormone progesterone.
She dealt with it by increasing her fibre intake — 'eating a lot of vegetables helps the bowels be more regular'.
'I also avoided caffeine and alcohol during this period, as these cause dehydration and slow the bowels.'
She says this could also help women with PMS-related bloating. Meanwhile, Dr Virginia Beckett, a gynaecologist and spokeswoman for the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists, tackles monthly mood swings with food. 'Mood swings are something I've encountered only over the past five years, and it's usually just the day before my period.
'I keep my blood sugar stable by drinking plenty and eating regularly.
'It doesn't matter what you eat — it's just not a good time to go without lunch.
'Avoiding swings in your blood sugar can help with mood before a period.
'I deal with cramps by taking an anti-inflammatory such as ibuprofen — an anti-inflammatory is probably more effective than other painkillers because the pain comes from the uterus contracting.'
To beat cravings, have a drink and a snack such as cereal, fruit or low-fat yoghurt, suggests a dietitian
Professor Andrew Eder, of the Eastman Dental Institute at University College London, has six fillings, but puts them down to a 'mis-spent youth' and hasn't had a new one for 15 years.
'I brush my teeth twice a day to protect my teeth and gums — once with a manual and once with an electric toothbrush.
'Although you get the benefits of the vibration with the electric brush, it can be easier to access the hard-to-reach places at the back with the smaller handle and head of a manual brush.'
'Leather is very unforgiving and can cause hard skin, pain and corns on the underside of feet,' says Peter Christer, of Maidenhead Podiatry.
Corns — small areas of dense, hard skin — are caused by pressure and friction.
'I tend to go for soft, air-cushioned soles.'
He also avoids going barefoot on any communal area to guard against verrucas. 'If I want to be absolutely sure, I'd even wear flip-flops in a hotel room. It's a very hardy virus.'
If the weight creeps on, Dr Adrian Park, obesity consultant at Addenbrooke's Hospital in Cambridge, has a simple method for shedding it. 'I eat a light breakfast and lunch and a decent-sized meal at night.
'I start the day with orange juice, muesli and a cup of tea. Lunch is a sandwich, piece of fruit and water. This gives me enough leeway to have what I want in the evening, and the occasional cake without feeling guilty.'
To beat cravings, registered dietitian Rick Miller will do a chore. 'I ask myself if the craving is coming from my stomach or my head.
'If my tummy's rumbling, I'll have a drink and a snack — cereal, fruit or low-fat yoghurt — to take the edge off. If it's just a mental craving I distract myself, perhaps by doing a chore. I wouldn't do something passive, like watching television.'
'I have attacks of pain in my back about three times a year,' says Rajiv Bajekal, consultant orthopaedic surgeon at Barnet Hospital. 'It's just wear and tear — the joints and discs wear out a bit as you get older.
'I take some painkillers, such as paracetamol, for a few days and I'll also do simple yoga exercises to stretch my back and sort my muscles out. Lying down, I pull my knees to my stomach and roll from side to side to give the back a good stretch. Another one is lying on my front and arching my back.
'I use a memory foam mattress, too. It contours to your spinal shape and eases pressures around it.'
'Many people think washing hair daily will make it fall out,' says Dr Bessam Farjo, a hair restoration surgeon in Manchester and London. 'But if you don't, it can end up in bad condition and then you may be more susceptible to hair breakage, which can look like hair loss because there's less hair volume on your head.'
Dr Farjo, 49, suffered male pattern baldness in his late 20s —losing all his hair except on the back and sides of his head.
To keep his remaining hair looking healthy, he shampoos and conditions it every day, gently pats it dry with a towel so as not to break it and, when using a hairdryer, keeps it on a warm setting and holds the dryer a foot away to minimise heat damage.
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6 1/4 x 4 inches
Larger cupcake than the usual. Hence the Frankie influence with that big 'ole head!
Real rivets in neck and scalp staples. Eyes are deep brown with black pupils and very lightly "clouded" like the early stages of glaucoma(sp?)..lol Sorry.
onomatoh, satomi hirota, and 2 other people added this photo to their favorites.
amazing shots of these.
I think this is my favorite.


text: The gite we stayed at was clean, and superbly equipped with nice touches in the kitchen like a fast boil kettle, toaster, iron/ironing board and clothes airer. Beds and sofas were comfy and there was plenty of garden furniture to relax in and eat al-fresco. The pool and surrounding grounds are lovely and well kept. Although the property is in... more


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Edmund Heylett Heylette
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The present invention concerns a process for modifying oxidizable surfaces, including diamond surfaces, including methods for metallizing these surfaces, where these methods include oxidation of these surfaces. The present invention also relates to the products of these methods.
In this process, a surface is first plasma oxidized, usually under an RF O2 plasma. Chemical functional groups are then attached to the surface. If the surface is to be metallized, the chemical functional groups are selected to be catalyzable, the surface is then catalyzed for electroless metallization, and the surface is finally treated with an electroless plating solution to metallize the surface.
If modified surface is to be patterned, the modified surface is exposed through a mask to pattern the surface after the attachment of the chemical functional groups.
1. A process for selectively metallizing a diamond surface, comprising the steps of:
oxidizing a diamond surface in an oxygen containing plasma induced by radio frequency radiation having a power ranging from 25 to 200 Watts for a period of time ranging between 10 seconds and 20 minutes, said step of oxidizing producing on oxidized surface with a sufficient density of oxygen on said diamond surface to functionalize said diamond surface for chemisorption;
attaching to said oxidized surface a homogeneous layer of chemical functional groups by chemisorbing chemicals having both a polar surface moiety that bonds with said oxidized surface and moieties of a selected functionality which do not bond with said oxidized surface;
selectively catalyzing said functionalized surface with a catalyst for electroless plating; and
selectively metallizing said catalyzed surface by electroless deposition,
wherein the step of attaching chemical functional groups to said oxidized diamond surface is attaching said chemical containing an organosilane polar surface moiety that bonds to said oxidized diamond surface and containing an amine moiety which does not bond to said oxidized diamond surface, and
wherein said chemical is monoamines, diamines, and triamines.
2. The process of
This is a continuation-in-part of prior application Ser. No. 07/691,565, filed Apr. 25, 1991 and now abandoned by Calvert et al., and incorporated by reference herein.
1. Field of the Invention
The present invention relates to methods for modifying oxidizable surfaces, including diamond surfaces, including methods for metallizing these surfaces, where these methods include plasma oxidation of these surfaces. The present invention also relates to the products of these methods.
2. Description of the Related Art
Modified surfaces are increasingly of great technological importance. In particular, modified diamond surfaces have increasing technological importance because of the attractive physical properties of diamond, including hardness, broad wavelength transparency, high thermal conductivity and sound propagation velocity, variable electrical resistivity, low friction coefficient, high refractive index, and chemical and biological inertness. Applications for modified diamond surfaces exist or are foreseen in a number of areas, including microelectronics (semiconductive layers, optical and x-ray masks, and heat dissipators), optics (transparent or antireflective coatings), machine tools (abrasion resistant coatings), and biotechnology (biocompatible coatings for implants, biosensors).
Of particular interest is the deposition of adherent, conductive metal coatings (including metal contacts) onto these surfaces for microelectronic and mechanical applications. For instance, metal-coated dielectric, such as polymers and ceramics (including diamond) have increasing technological importance in a variety of applications. These applications include use in circuit boards, use for shielding, lithographic masks, etc.
Surfaces coated with various chemical functional groups also are of increasing technological importance. Chemical sensing, including biosensing, is just one area where surfaces coated with chemical functional groups may be employed. For instance, a surface is coated with a particular antigen may be used in testing for a particular antibody.
For many of these applications, it is desirable for these surfaces to be modified in a pattern. The terms "pattern" and "patterning" have meanings that vary from application to application. However, for each area of application, these terms are well-understood by skilled practitioners in the art. For example, in the context of fabricating circuit boards, patterned metallization means laying down conductive pathways on a circuit board, preferably with through-holes and other useful structures. In the context of microelectronic applications, patterned metallization means laying down conductive pathways with linewidths in the sub-0.5 μm range, consistent with VLSI applications. Preferably, in the context of microelectronics, these linewidths are about 0.1 μm, using currently available lithographic techniques. As x-ray lithographic techniques improve, it is anticipated that the present invention will produce microelectronic circuits with linewiths of about 0.05 μm. In the context of lithography, patterning means creating a pattern of lines on a mask with sufficient resolution and packing density for the particular application at hand. In the context of chemical applications (such as chemical sensing) patterned chemical modification means attaching chemical groups in a pattern consistent with the specific application and system at hand.
A problem associated with patterned metallization is that it is typically accomplished by means of a "lift-off" process, in which metal is evaporated or sputtered over a lithographically defined photoresist, and then dissolution of the remaining resist removes metal from selected regions of the metallized surface. This process, which is subtractive in nature, wastes metal and is more difficult and expensive than a process in which metal is deposited in an additive fashion, i.e. only in regions where it is required.
Various workers have fabricated contacts and metal patterns on diamond using sputter deposition or evaporation of Ag, Cu and Au, Al, W and numerous alloys. The principal problems with forming diamond/metal interfaces fabricated with conventional methods are obtaining reproducible and controllable electrical characteristics and obtaining satisfactory adhesion of the metal to the diamond surface.
Acceptable adhesion of metal to diamond and good ohmic contact can be obtained if the metallized substrate is annealed at high temperature (800-900° C.), forming a metal carbide layer at the interface. However, such high temperature is also problematic for metal/diamond contact formation because the diamond surface is subject to graphitization, which can degrade the electrical properties of the interface. Vacuum metallization is another available method for metallizing diamond surfaces, but this method requires complex, expensive equipment.
A problem with forming polymer/metal interfaces is that currently employed techniques for surface modification result in a surface that is roughened on the microns scale. For many applications, especially microwave and millimeter wave applications, a much smoother surface is desired.
The principal problem encountered in modifying diamond and other surfaces, both for metallization and other types of functionalization, is putting a sufficient density of functional groups on the diamond surface to carry out a chemisorption reaction. As is shown below in the summary of the invention, plasma oxidation processes are useful for this purpose. Other processes may also be useful. Diamond surfaces may be modified by detergents and acids, which produce oxygen-containing functionalities on the diamond surface. However, these processes may not result in a sufficient concentration of the type of oxygen-containing functional groups needed to carry out a commercially viable chemisorption reaction. Only oxidation processes that result in high concentrations of oxygen-containing functional groups that participate in chemisorption reactions are useful for modifying oxidizable surfaces.
Adhesive metal patterns can be deposited selectively on a wide variety of surfaces using ultrathin film (UTF)-based metallization processes. See co-pending application Ser. No. 07/691,565; see also Schnur et al., U.S. Pat. No. 5,077,085, issued Dec. 31, 1991; Schnur et al., U.S. Pat. No. 5,079,600, issued Jan. 7, 1992; Calvert et al., New Surface Imaging Techniques for Sub-0.5 Micrometer Optical Lithography, Solid State Technology 34, 77 (October 1991); Dressick et al., Selective Electroless Metallization of Patterned Ligand Surfaces, Proc. Materials Research Soc'y 1992 Spring Meeting Symposium C: Advanced Metallization & Processing for Semiconductor Devices (in press); Calvert et al., Top Surface Imaging Using Selective Electroless Metallization of Patterned Monolayer Films, ACS Symposium Series on Polymers for Microelectronics (invited paper), which are incorporated by reference herein.
These references describe methods and materials for the attachment (by chemisorption) of ultrathin film (UTF) precursor materials (such as organosilanes or organotitanates) to surfaces that either intrinsically possess, or are treated to have, highly reactive polar surface groups. The references also teach patterning the chemisorbed UTF layers with actinic radiation, catalyzing the patterned UTF layers by exposure to either a Pd/Sn colloidal catalyst or a tin-free Pd catalyst, then selectively metallizing by immersion in an electroless plating bath. Omission of the irradiation step leads to a homogeneously metallized, rather than a patterned, surface.
Many surfaces, however, do not intrinsically possess a suitable density of reactive surface groups to carry out a commercially viable chemisorption reaction to attach UTFs. These surfaces include diamond and polymers such as polyethylene (PE) and polyethersulfone (PES). Direct treatment of these substrates with UTF precursors does not lead to a useful degree of surface functionalization. To modify or metallize these surfaces, a different approach is needed.
These surfaces can be rendered amenable to chemisorption reactions by carefully chosen surface oxidation pretreatment. Many methods for oxidizing surfaces are known, some of which include treatment with KMnO4, chromic acid, molecular or atomic oxygen, ozone, peroxide, persulfate, perchlorate, etc. The nature, distribution, and density of oxidized surface functional groups depends greatly on the type of oxidant, the substrate, and the particular treatment conditions. Thus, although a variety of oxidation pretreatments are available, few are actually useful for practical applications due to factors such as reagent toxicity, environmental unsuitability, need for expensive capital equipment, undesired side reactions, unsuitable reaction conditions (high temperature, long treatment times), or inability to produce the specific type and density of oxidized surface functional groups required for UTF chemisorption. In the co-pending application, the PE and PES surfaces were oxidized in a hot acidic potassium dichromate solution for 90 minutes to obtain surface functionalization with ligating UTFs and subsequent electroless metallization. This approach is not particularly desirable because of the use of highly corrosive, toxic and environmentally problematic chemicals, as well as long treatment times.
Relatively little is known about the effects of varying oxidation conditions on diamond surfaces. Known methods for oxidizing diamond include heating in O2 and O, and treatment with detergents and acids. For several reasons, these processes are undesirable as oxidative pretreatments for UTF surface functionalization. Oxidation in O2 at elevated temperatures is highly complex and, depending on conditions, may be slow and may lead to graphitization, faceting and etching. The diamond surface oxygen-containing groups generated by exposure to O2 or O are thought to be primarily bridging etheric and carbonyl oxygen groups. These surface groups are not readily amenable to chemisorption. The nature and distribution of oxidized surface functionalities formed by oxidation in detergents and acids are not known.
Because of the uncertainty associated with the nature of the untreated diamond surface, it was necessary to develop procedures for diamond oxidation that would lead to sufficient functionalization for the selective metallization process to occur. A practical, reproducible method is needed for oxidizing surfaces as a pretreatment for carrying out a chemisorption reaction, where this oxidation method forms significant densities of groups that are readily amenable to chemisorption.
Another problem is encountered in modifying many polymer substrates: swelling, blistering and dissolution of the polymer substrate when the chemisorption reaction is carried out in organic solution. Therefore, it is desirable to carry out the chemisorption reactions in substantially aqueous solutions (i.e. solutions without sufficient quantities organic solvents to cause these deleterious effects). Aqueous solutions have the additional advantages of being more economical, environmentally friendlier, and safer than many organic solutions.
Accordingly, it is an object of this invention to oxidize surfaces, including diamond surfaces, to put a sufficient type and density of oxygen-containing functional groups on the surface to perform commercially viable chemisorption reactions.
It is a further object of this invention to perform chemisorption reactions on these surfaces, thereby attaching a homogeneous layer of chemical functional groups to these surfaces, where these layers optionally form patterns.
It is a further object of this invention to perform these chemisorption reactions in substantially aqueous solutions.
It is a further object of this invention to deposit on these surfaces, adherent, conductive metal coatings with reproducible and controllable characteristics, at temperatures well below annealing temperatures, without roughening these surfaces by an amount that will significantly affect the transmission of microwaves or millimeter waves, and to deposit these metal coatings additively, and without the use of highly toxic reagents such as chromic acid, and where these metal coatings optionally form patterns.
These and other objects of the invention are accomplished by the structures and processes hereinafter described.
The method of the present invention comprises oxidizing a surface in an oxygen-containing plasma, and attaching to the oxidized surface chemical functional groups capable of bonding to the oxidized surface by performing a chemisorption reaction between the oxidized surface and the chemical functional groups. The method of the present invention may optionally include the additional step of metallizing the functionalized surface by immersion in an electroless plating bath. The method of the present invention may optionally include the additional step of photolithographically patterning the functionalized surface with actinic radiation. If the surface is metallized, any photolithographic patterning step is carried out prior to electroless metallization. The process of the invention for selectively metallizing diamond films is described in Calvert et al., Selective Metallization of CVD Diamond Film, Proc. Materials Research Soc'y 1992 Spring Meeting, Symposium C: Advanced Metallization & Processing for Semiconductor Devices (in press), which is incorporated by reference herein.
The product of this method is a modified surface, which optionally may be selectively patterned. This surface may be a diamond surface or some other oxidizable surface. If the surface is diamond, it may be free-standing or disposed on a substrate. The modified surface may be metallized or chemically functionalized. The selectively patterned metallized surface may form a printed circuit board, and may include through-holes and other useful structures.
The functional groups referred to in this application are only those functional groups that react with surface oxygen groups in a chemisorption reaction. Furthermore, in the context of metallization, the functional groups referred to in this application are only those functional groups which are catalyzable for electroless metallization.
A more complete appreciation of the invention will be readily obtained by reference to the following Description of the Preferred Embodiments and the accompanying drawing, wherein:
FIG. 1 illustrates the process steps for selectively depositing a metal film on diamond.
In a preferred embodiment of the invention, as shown in step (1) of FIG. 1, the surface is oxidized in an RF oxygen plasma, thereby modifying the surface to include oxygen-containing functional groups. Other oxygen-containing plasmas, such as air plasmas, are also effective, but are less preferred than RF oxygen plasmas, due to the potential incorporation of non-oxygen-containing species. The oxidation conditions preferably should fall within the range from about 10 seconds to about 20 minutes and from about 25 watts to about 200 watts. Consistently good results are observed throughout this range of oxidation conditions. Most preferably, a minimum oxidation time is used to optimize the cycle time.
The plasma oxidation treatment provides an effective method for oxidizing the diamond surface. This treatment provides a sufficient density of the necessary oxygen-containing surface groups, which are believed to be primarily hydroxyl (—OH) or hydroxyl-containing functional groups, amenable to further chemisorption reactions.
In the case where the surface is to be metallized, it is preferred to functionalize the oxidized surface with catalyzable functional groups (i.e. catalyzable ligands), as shown in step (2) of FIG. 1, and to additionally catalyze the functionalized surface with any of the known metallization catalysts used for electroless metallization, as shown in step (4) of FIG. 1.
Preferably, the catalyzable chemical functional groups are attached to the oxidized surface by chemisorbing catalyzable functional groups onto the oxidized diamond surface. The term "chemisorbed functional group" refers to a structure, typically an organosilane, with a polar surface group which binds to the oxidized surface, and a terminal group which imparts the desired functionality to the surface. In metallization applications, this terminal group binds to a metallization catalyst, unless treated with actinic radiation. See U.S. Pat. No. 5,079,600. Chemisorption provides a means for conferring a wide range of functional characteristics (such as chemical reactivity, photosensitivity, surface free energy, density and spacing of surface functional groups, etc.) to the surface. Persons skilled in the art can readily select from a wide variety of chemisorbed functional groups to impart desirable functional characteristics. A selection of these groups may be found in Silicon Compounds Register and Review, (Huls America), incorporated by reference herein. Most preferably, the chemical functional groups contain one or more amine terminal groups. Amine groups may be monoamines, diamines or triamines. Most preferably, the terminal groups are unreactive with either the oxidized surface or the surface groups that bind to the oxidized surface.
Organosilane chemical functional groups may be monofunctional, difunctional or trifunctional silane groups. Preferred chemical functional groups contain polar heads with one or more methoxy groups or one or more chloride groups. Step (2) in FIG. 1 illustrates chemisorption of a trifunctional silane.
In the case where the surface is to be photolithographically patterned, the reactivity of the functionalized surface is selectively modified by irradiating the functionalized surface with actinic radiation through a photolithographic mask. This actinic radiation, which is defined as radiation which effects chemical changes in the chemical functional groups, includes UV light, x-rays, electron beams and ion beams. Preferably, this actinic radiation is deep UV light, as shown in step (3) of FIG. 1. As with plasma oxidation, it is preferred to minimize the exposure time to optimize cycle time. UV lasers, especially ArF excimer lasers are preferred for exposing the functionalized surface, due to the fast exposure times they achieve. Exposure to deep UV light modifies the reactivity of the terminal groups. In particular, upon exposure, catalyzable terminal groups lose their ability to bind to metallization catalysts. Consequently, only unexposed portions of the functionalized surface will be metallized upon immersion in the electroless plating bath.
In a preferred embodiment of the invention, the catalyst is a palladium catalyst. More preferably, the catalyst is essentially tin-free. Most preferably, the catalyst is selected from the group PdCl4 2− salts, bis-(benzonitrile)palladium dichloride and palladium dichloride. Skilled practitioners in the art will recognize that a large variety of complexation reactions (reactions between catalysts and catalyzable functional groups) may be selected from. See generally A. Martell et al. "Critical Stability Constants", Plenum Press, New York (1975) (tabulating complexation reactions), incorporated by reference herein.
In the case where the functionalized surface is photolithographically patterned prior to metallization, the metallization step, shown in step (5) of FIG. 1, will result in the deposition of a metal layer only on the unexposed portions of the surface. In many microelectronic applications, it is preferred to pattern the metal into electrical circuitry, and to use the surface layer as a circuit board. In the case where the surface is diamond, the diamond may act as an efficient heat sink for this circuitry. Preferably, the diamond layer will be on a substrate. For example, the diamond layer may be deposited by CVD. In other microelectronic applications, it will be preferred to use the diamond layer as a semiconductor.
In the case where the functionalized surface is not patterned prior to metallization, the metallization step will result in the deposition of a homogeneous metal layer on the entire surface.
The compatibility of the selective metallization process with oxidizable surfaces provides a considerable advantage in producing adherent metal coatings on surfaces for microelectronic and other applications. A number of these advantages (e.g., high resolution, additive process for metallization, controlled adhesion) are inherent in this process. Additional advantages are that fewer and less complex processing steps required for selective metallization, that adhesive metallization is obtained without high temperature annealing steps, and that substantially aqueous solutions of chemisorption precursors may be employed.
Having described the invention, the following examples are given to illustrate specific applications of the invention, including the best mode now known to perform the invention. These specific examples are not intended to limit the scope of the invention described in this application.
In the examples below, contact angle measurements were made with a water drop and an NRL Zisman-type contact angle goniometer.
In the examples below, "MES Buffer Solution" means a solution that was prepared as follows. 2.13 g MES.H2O solid was added to 50 ml H2O with stirring until dissolution. The pH of the solution was adjusted to between 4.9 and 5.0 by dropwise addition of dilute NaOH. The solution was diluted to 100 ml. This solution had an MES concentration of 0.1 M. Other concentrations of MES were obtained by appropriate adjustment of the dilution.
Substrates having a 10 μm thick CVD diamond film on a silicon wafer (Crystallume Co., Menlo Park, Calif.) were cleaned by sequential ultrasonication in toluene, 2-propanol, and deionized (DI) water. The water contact angle (measured using the sessile drop method) for the cleaned diamond surface was 68±4°, indicative of a relatively hydrophobic surface.
The diamond substrates were then inserted into a Branson Model IPC plasma etcher and subjected to an RF plasma using 1 torr and 225 sccm of O2 for varying lengths of time and at different RF power levels. Oxidation conditions ranged from 30 sec at 25 Watts to 10 min at 100 W. All surfaces after plasma oxidation were highly wettable by water, and gave contact angles of 15±7°. No systematic dependence, or major variation of the contact angle was observed for the range of plasma oxidation conditions investigated.
X-ray photoelectron spectroscopy (XPS) of oxidized diamond under a variety of exposure conditions and times shows development of a feature on the CIS peak. The binding energy and intensity are consistent with a surface layer of oxygen bonded to the diamond surface. The contact angle and XPS measurements demonstrate that the O2 plasma treatment is very effective at converting the initial diamond surface into a polar, highly wettable surface.
A plasma oxidized diamond film was prepared as described in Example 1, using an RF power of 100 W for 2 min. The oxidized diamond substrate was then immersed in a 1% (v/v) solution of 2-(trimethoxysilyl)ethyl-2-pyridine (Huls America, Piscataway, N.J.) in 0.001 M acetic acid/toluene at room temperature.
The solution was placed on a hotplate and warmed for 40 min. until the temperature reached 65° C. The diamond substrate was removed from the solution and rinsed twice in fresh toluene. The slide was then baked for 5 min. at 120° C. on the surface of a hotplate. The water contact angle of the silanized diamond surface was 45°, a value that is consistent with other substrates treated with this organosilane (see Dressick et al.). This example demonstrates that surface of a diamond substrate produced by O2 plasma etching provides a sufficient density of the necessary functional groups for the attachment of an organosilane.
A plasma oxidized diamond film was prepared as described in Example 1. The substrate was then treated with a 1% (v/v) solution of (tridecafluoro-1,1,2,2-tetrahydrooctyl)-1-dimethylchlorosilane (Huls America) in toluene at room temperature under an argon atmosphere for 45 min.
The diamond substrate was removed from the solution, rinsed twice in fresh toluene, and was baked for 5 min. at 120° C. on the surface of a hotplate. The water contact angle of the silanized diamond surface ranged from 57-62°, a value that is similar to other substrates treated with this organosilane (see Dulcey et al. Science 252, 551 (1991)). XPS analysis of the modified surface shows signals for Si and F, both constituents of the organosilane layer that are not present on the unmodified diamond surface. This example demonstrates that surface of a diamond substrate produced by O2 plasma etching provides the necessary functional groups for the attachment of chloro- as well as alkoxy-organosilane functional groups.
A plasma oxidized diamond film was prepared as described in Example 1. The substrate was then treated with a 1% (v/v) solution of m,p-(aminoethylaminomethyl)phenethyltrimethoxysilane (Huls America) in 95:4 (v:v) methanol:water with 0.001 M acetic acid at room temperature for 25 min.
The diamond substrate was removed from the solution, rinsed twice in fresh toluene, and was baked for 5 min. at 120° C. on the surface of a hotplate. The water contact angle of the silanized diamond surface was 54±3°, a value that is similar to other substrates treated with this organosilane (see: Silicon Compounds Register and Review, Huls America). XPS analysis of the modified surface shows signals for Si and N, both constituents of the organosilane layer that are not present on the unmodified diamond surface. This example illustrates the generality of the procedure for modification of oxidized diamond surfaces with chemisorbed films.
A silicon carbide substrate (area≈1 cm2) was oxidized in an RF oxygen plasma at 100 W for 30 sec. The water contact angle of the oxidized surface was 11°. The substrate was then treated with a 1% (v/v) solution of adamantyltrichlorosilane (Huls America) in toluene at room temperature for 5 min. The substrate was removed from the solution, rinsed twice in fresh toluene, and was baked for 5 min. at 120° C. on the surface of the hotplate. The water contact angle of the silanized surface was 69°, a value that is consistent with a surface having hydrophobic adamantyl groups. This example illustrates that substrates other than diamond can be functionalized by plasma oxidation followed by chemisorption of an organosilane film.
A highly oriented pyrolytic graphite (HOPG) substrate (area≈1 cm2) was oxidized in an RF oxygen plasma at 100 W for 30 sec. The water contact angle of the oxidized surface was 35°. The substrate was then treated with a 1% (v/v) solution of adamantyltrichlorosilane as described in Example 5. The water contact angle of the silanized surface was 69°, a value that is consistent with a hydrocarbon terminated surface. This example further illustrates the generality of the plasma oxidation/silanization process with regard to substrates other than diamond.
A diamond film was treated with m,p-(aminoethylaminomethyl)phenethyltrimethoxysilane as described in Example 4. The film was then exposed to an aqueous palladium-based catalyst solution. The composition of this solution is as follows: [Cl−]=0.11 M, [MES buffer]=0.009 M, mg Na2PdCl4.3 H2O/0.1 l=10.3, pH=5.7. This was solution aged 2 days before use. The film was exposed to the solution for 35 min, rinsed with DI water, and then immersed in an electroless nickel plating bath (NIPOSIT™ 468, 10% strength; manufactured by Shipley Co., Newton, Mass.) at room temperature. Visible metal deposition initiated on the catalyzed surface within 2 min. and was allowed to continue for 1 hr after which a shiny white, nickel deposit was produced on the substrate. The metallized diamond film was removed from the plating bath, rinsed with DI water, and dried under a stream of filtered N2. A Scotch™ tape peel test on the nickel plated surface resulted in no observable removal of metal from the substrate. This example demonstrates that the metallization process can be applied to diamond substrates to produce adhesive metal deposits without any high temperature annealing steps.
A diamond film was treated with 2-(trimethoxysilyl)ethyl-2-pyridine as described in Example 2. The diamond substrate was placed in mechanical contact with a chrome-on-quartz lithographic mask that had arrays of serpentine test structure with features to 10 μm linewidth. The film was then exposed through the mask to 10 J/cm2 of 248 nm radiation from a KrF excimer laser. The exposed film was treated with the catalyst solution of Example 7 for 55 min, rinsed with DI water and immersed in an electroless cobalt plating bath for 4 min.
The electroless cobalt plating bath was prepared as follows: 6.0 g of CoCl2.6 H2O, 10.0 g NH4Cl and 9.8 g Na2EDTA was dissolved in 150 ml of DI water and the pH brought to 8.2 by addition of 1M NaOH (aq) solution. Three volumes of the Co solution were added to one volume of a solution consisting of 8.0 g of dimethylamine borane complex in 100 ml of water.
The wafer was removed from the plating bath, rinsed with DI water and dried under a stream of filtered nitrogen. The wafer exhibited cobalt metal patterns with feature sizes to 10 μm in the unexposed regions of the surface, resulting in a positive tone image. This example demonstrates that diamond substrates can be rendered amenable to the UTF metallization process. It also demonstrates the generality of the process on diamond with respect to various electroless metallization baths.
A diamond film was treated with m,p-(aminoethylaminomethyl)phenethyltrimethoxysilane as described in Example 4. The diamond substrate was placed in mechanical contact with a lithographic mask. The film was then exposed through the mask to 1.2 J/cm2 of 193 nm radiation from an ArF excimer laser. The exposed film was treated with the catalyst solution of Example 7 for 30 min, rinsed with DI water and immersed in the electroless nickel plating bath of Example 7 for 65 min. The wafer was removed from the plating bath, rinsed with DI water and dried under a stream of filtered nitrogen. The wafer exhibited nickel metal patterns in a positive tone image. This example demonstrates the generality of the metallization process on diamond substrates with regard to the film employed and the exposure wavelength.
A commercial grade piece of ABS plastic was oxidized with an RF plasma as described in Example 9. The oxidized plastic was then treated with a 1% solution of N-(2-aminoethyl)-3-aminopropyltrimethoxysilane (EDA) in water containing 0.001M acetic acid for 20 min. The substrate was then removed from the solution, rinsed with water and dried. The silanized ABS substrate was then catalyzed with the catalyst solution of Example 7 and then metallized with an electroless nickel bath as described in Example 7. A homogeneous nickel deposit was produced on the entire substrate. The metallized substrate was removed from the plating bath, rinsed with DI water, and dried. A tape peel test on the nickel plated surface resulted in no observable removal of metal from the substrate. This example demonstrates that the UTF metallization process can be applied to non-diamond substrates to produce adhesive metal deposits without any surface roughening or high temperature annealing steps. It further demonstrates that aqueous silane solutions can be used to functionalize oxidized substrates. Aqueous solutions allow substrates that are soluble in organics to be used in this process.
Commercial grade pieces of polycarbonate and polysulfone plastic were oxidized with an RF plasma, functionalized with EDA silane, and metallized with electroless nickel as described in Example 10. Homogeneous nickel deposits were produced across the entire surface of each substrate. A tape peel test on the nickel plated surface resulted in no observable removal of metal from the substrate. This example demonstrates the generality of the UTF metallization process for adhesive metallization of plastic substrates.
A spin cast film of an epoxy-based polymer (Shipley Multiposit™ XP91111 EC photodielectric) on a silicon wafer was oxidized with an RF plasma, functionalized with EDA silane, and metallized with EDA silane as described in Example 10. Homogeneous nickel deposits were produced across the entire surface of the epoxy substrate. A tape peel test on the nickel plated surfaces resulted in no observable removal of metal. This example demonstrates the generality of the UTF metallization process for adhesive metallization of polymer substrates.
Obviously, many modifications and variations of the present invention are possible in light of the above teachings. It is therefore to be understood that, within the scope of the appended claims, the invention may be practiced otherwise than as specifically described.
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Originally posted by DClasgens:Thanks for the insight @notsure. We will definitely be keeping on our eyes on the Bluebirds big men. We mostly go off what coaches tell us and Mueller indicated that will be an area that will need to prove itself. Either way, big things are ahead for Highlands again in 2012.
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about Todd FlowerdayA Roman Catholic lay person, married (since 1996), with one adopted child (since 2001). I serve in worship and spiritual life in a midwestern university parish.
about John Donaghy
John is a lay missionary since 2007 with a parish in western Honduras. Before that he served in campus ministry and social justice ministry in Iowa. His ministry blog is http://hermanojuancito.blogspot.com
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He'll be a long-term contributor here analyzing the Latin American bishops' document from their 2007 Aparecida Conference.
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On My Bookshelf: A Natural History of the Piano
Stuart Isacoff's book–I could call this a biography–is a hugely enjoyable read. Great combo of historical information, personal testimony of artists and by artists, and the occasional supporting illustration. Mr Isacoff starts with the ancient history of the instrument, early … Continue reading
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Lenten Reflections: Arevakal
Often missed in the blizzard of symphonies Alan Hovhaness composed are various works for orchestra not labeled "symphony," but which to my ear, don't sound much different from them. You can hear an early Hovhaness work, his first concerto for … Continue reading
Posted in Lent, Music Tagged Alan Hovhaness Leave a comment
Music From Our Sea
There is an enormous wealth of fabulous music online. Much is not readily available in recorded form–concerts and such. I'm disinclined to hero worship as readers here know. About the closest I get is my admiration for the fine musician … Continue reading
Posted in Music Tagged Jordi Savall Leave a comment
When I was working my way through grad school, I spent a few years as a part-time jazz and classical announcer in public radio. I enjoyed both genres, but it was a real expansion working in an environment where I was … Continue reading
Posted in Music Tagged jazz, Yellowjackets 1 Comment
On The Shore
Frequent commenter and friend Jimmy Mac forwarded me a letter to the editor of The Tablet. From Peter Stanford, it read, in part: We were so relieved when our local parish priest agreed that my dad could have a Catholic … Continue reading
Posted in Liturgy, Music Tagged funeral 2 Comments
About every five years I run across music that rockets to the top of my favorite list. I listened to the first song from Anaïs Mitchell's folk opera Hadestown on YouTube. Then I paused and ordered the full cd online. … Continue reading
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Riu Riu Chiu
I was looking for a version of "Riu Riu Chiu" to share that I have on vinyl from the early 80's. Not on YouTube. Maybe someday I'll record my own version and post it here. The "nonsense" title is thought … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas, Music Leave a comment


text:
News: Nintendo scoops British Technology awards
We're British and apparently we all think Nintendo are great, so why not report it as some news.
The Awards – which have been voted for online by the general public through www.britishtechnologyawards.com and by readers of Computeractive and Personal Computer World – have been created to offer a snapshot of the country's digital lifestyle. Designed to provide a glimpse at the nation's..