text:
These Free Verse Loss poems are examples of Free Verse poems about Loss. These are the best examples of Free Verse Loss poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
If you don't find the poem you want here, try our incredible, super duper, all-knowing, advanced poem search engine.
Mama, did you know the precious amethyst shadow hours I spent beside you, cuddled cosy-close, nestled in blankets of light, shawled in your red-gold hair? I kissed each tear you cried; each one a starlight pearl forged from the depths of your fragile soul. I rocked seashell-shut to each lullaby note and silently watched as you rocked my cold, empty cradle. Sometimes you sensed me coiled at your breast - a small balled knot of grief. You felt my tiny fingers plucking at you as tingling shivers. And sometimes I bounced sunshine-free on your knee, a giggling orb of light. Little one, once again I felt you here, entombed in the womb of this eternal everywhere room, your spirit sifting through my fingers like hourglass sand. Pain has blanked my mind wraith-white, but I felt your lips nip the warm rosebuds of my nipples as I pressed a lullaby to the delicate shell of your ear and brief blessed seconds spun out like years. My sentient heart will always hold you, my grip will never slip as my earthbound hands, human-warm, reach through time and heather-shadowed ether to love and care for you. *'phantasy' is a deliberate misspelling, an amalgamation of 'phantom' and 'fantasy'
like visitors from outer space they came with tears, and lined the sidewalk long in face, and arms embracing some (I have no inkling) who they were or why they felt compelled to come here dozens came with casseroles a few with flowers, wads of tissues tender words of helpless mutterings many acts of generous offerings don't get me wrong, I watched the suffering expressed in words or acts of kindness I watched it all, and felt the love did not dismiss the warm compassion returned it all, with pure compliance a thankful heart, a swollen throat I hugged these strangers at the door to comfort them, who shed their tears upon my shoulder, offered them a place to share their sympathies a place to spend their mercy, pure but, this was my child who suffered loss impossible........I can't express it protected from the very start, by loving hands, her dad's and mine, we watched her grow, and let her go she grew from the vine ....into a rose but life composed a tragedy with goals beyond our reach...beyond our wildest dreams and left her with a loss beyond control like visitors from outer space we watch as others come, and others go they blow into their tissue wads and empty the boxes one by one and cry with us, and then they all go home do we cry........? Oh no, not yet... instead we smile a grateful smile and thank them kindly for the while and for the ways they share their love but we can't cry into our own clenched wad of tissue from the tissue box she needs us to be strong, somehow and so that is the way it is, we vow...to hold back all the tears for now for, this was my child who suffered loss impossible........I can't express it __________________________________________ 4/12/13
Visited you today as the sun set in the horizon… the orange tinged carnations were a perfect complement for the skies and for you… orange and blue always remind me of you the winds softly blew and I just sat there staring at the grass, well more at your name really… hardly believing what I am looking at, that it's been seven years of missing you, of just putting that reality at the back of my mind… But there are days, such as today which make me confront that reality— I see your smile, remember your laughter celebrate your spirit and your love Tears, I tell you I have the most stubborn tears maybe because they make it so real for me? I look around me and look for that sign Nope, not there… I say a prayer and speak to you thankful for the life shared I kiss the date that you were born and walk away my reflection on the car window misty One last look around, and then I see it… a cat, as we drive away… Skies now streaked purple and pink **My brother would have been 40 today, May 6…
Things that seemed poetic were always sad, though I yearned for sparkle and my dad's guffaw, which never came. Familiar things were always drear -- repeated motions in the same old game. There were only distant glimpses of budding spring, fleeting views of daffodils. The strongest poems dealt me death and dying. Yet I always hoped, never went under to gray despair, always dreaming of a garden of love that we could share. But those forbidden delights faded quickly away; the only reality I understand is the ever-looming and final one. Nothing's changed. The strongest poems deal death and dying.
Kyoko walks alone in the morning tide, comforted for a fleeting moment by salty air. She feels the same sand between her toes as when she was a barefoot little girl, in a time she felt safe, when the eyes of her mother protected her like a suit of armor - before the mighty wall of water, the "harbor wave", towered over her village near Fukushima, washing her happy childhood away. Her dear mother, her security, her everything never came home that day. Many months later, her father, a local fisherman, has lost his ability to cry, laugh or tell her why. His silent eyes, cold like frost, are dead like the poisoned fish he nets every morning. In many ways, Kyoko lost both of her parents on that haunting day - forced to grow up long before the water receded, before the nuclear leak, before this new, austere existence. Night deepens the despair. She is loneliest when darkness invades. She prays for the crickets return. They no longer sing her to sleep, and the stars have faded, no longer shining through her open window. Even the grasshoppers have died… from restless sleep, night calls her to the mirror to find her mother's dark eyes staring back at her – a curse she hopes will one day become a blessing, a hope that one day her father will look at her again... With tomorrow, her greatest burden will return. She will wake along side the broken-winged butterfly with her duties in mind. Then, she'll wear her stoic face to the marketplace. Father says he will soon lose his fishing boat. She has heard visitors from the city say only a fool would eat the fish from nearby waters, the same fish she fries most every day. No one knows the global impact, they say. She hears foreign words like radiation, disease and mutation while she sells the shiso and wasabi root from their garden stand, feeling fear she does not fully understand but one day will. She only knows how to survive today… For Debbie Guzzi's Global Poetry Contest, 11/19/14
I've distanced myself I didn't mean to Didn't set out to do it An unconscious act of the mind For self preservation My visits went to once a week Sunday dinners that once lasted for hours Became shorter and shorter Until now its get in Get it cooked Clean it up Visit And we're out Occasionally circumstances would Happen and one would be missed Oh well I'll go during the week Sometimes I did Sometimes I didn't Today my heart cried to be near you I entered the home and immediately Settled my mood into the atmosphere Funeral home-esque for lack of a better description I speak in hushed tones Slow my movements And quiet my spirit You want something Oh thank you give me a job What do you need???? Anything I'll gladly do anything So many things hurt you now You who were so tough reduced to such pain Questions, answers, questions, answers Over and over and over This is the part I know I've practiced this so many times before You speak and in mid sentence you cry Have I seen my sister,,you can't remember Ever seeing my sister, have you seen her Yes mom remember mom My answers are calm Almost rehearsed Repeated Sterile You look searching in my eyes Yours, sunken, confused, Pained, with a depth of sadness I haven't seen before I look away. I meet all the needs you've asked of me I pat you, hug you, pray with you I look at my brother, the saint He's tired, worn, sad I leave, I'm OUT I drive How'd I get here How long have I been driving The sky so desperately gray Muted tones of nothingness The air feels so heavy Like a shroud encompassing me Choking me The river runs beside me It rages from the wind There's no stopping its power It's dark and gloomy and brown And suits my mood I try to pray HOW DO I PRAY Do I pray for healing, Health, life, death Joy, maybe peace I cry out to you I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PRAY I look to the sky and see The smallest spot of the most beautiful sapphire blue In a sea of nothing And I cry
This battle brews inside me The pain I feel in my heart ripping it apart And my soul who wants to be redeemed The movement of my pen beats in my chest In my veins my words flow like the rage of rivers in storm I'm caught in these lyrics that Awaken my soul That cry out for eternity Yet my heart is trodden at times I swear it is not beating Our hearts rose up like kindred knights ready to defend our land but the soul was fulfilling its destiny it would not be beaten, no matter… it had awakened to truth but our hearts knew only torment and could not understand all that was happening, that God had a plan so my pain exposes itself in my thoughts manifesting to script as it beats in my chest with a rhythmic pulse that brings me to my knees We had no time to prepare Only to fight Flailing around Hope With all of our might as if it were the weapon that would save us from our enemy for that's all we had was our sword of Hope This battle we were not prepared for. Like a sneak attack, it caught us in slumber when the army of death ascended upon our world my heart said I love you you are my universe and life has no meaning without you I will fight till my shallow breath abates Till your soul takes the last blow... And I did! We Did! We did not surrender We had no chance Our hearts fought a losing battle My awakened soul shouts out with acceptance… "you will one day know the reason, but not now" For this is your time to experience what was lovingly bestowed upon you from our God, who knows what we need So now I write from my pain… It helps me to cope… It is the sword I carry… My only Hope
That December I stumbled through twisted tinsel streets, oblivious to ice and seasonal shouts, muffled by snow-silence; a mannequin moving through mists, quietly fragmenting behind frost-fragile walls of frailty. Bleak winds blew open the hinges of my hypothermic heart, wailed a wintry lament only I could hear - ice-shrapnel words blown to lodge in my ear: you've lost the baby. Those four words were spiked icicles, glacier-cold; hope disintegrated like snow powder as they pierced me. Streets seemed pregnant with the plumpness of babies, their waxen doll faces bluish and cold, their pink gummy mouths demanding, demanding. And my breasts were frozen roses, too iced to feed their tiny need. Snowflakes trembled like butterflies blown from the Arctic, or the feeble flutter of a failing foetal heartbeat. The town became a barren expanse of white: cold crystals drifting, acres of snow-diamond light. But shops shimmered with heat, bulged bauble-gaudy with the fatness of consumerism. And I was reed-slender, my womb a hollowed-out tomb. Everywhere, babies bloomed, precious as poinsettias, mouths like petals, squirmy with hungry red cries and squalls, echoing, echoing, as I squinted into the white squall. And a ribbon of milk unloosed itself silently, sudden and scalding, like a fountaining of tears; a lacework trace soaking my shimmer thread sweater dress; a single, small, white thaw as I silently unravelled, stumbling through streets that spooled like silver yarn - that December. 9/11/2013 for 'Fragment' contest
The girl is an ultra-modern scholar, Belongs with an upper-middle class family. Looking very nice, smart, gets angry suddenly. She reads M.A in English at Presidency University. She is assimilating to the ideas of Shakespeare, Shelley, Keats, Neruda, Byron... Fluently speaks English, loves cricket. Shoulders are shaken by expression. She cries alone, laughs with everyone.... The girl is very good. The boy is a post-modern educated son of a lower-middle class family. He studies M.A in Bengali at Calcutta University. He is assimilating to the routes of Vaishnab literature, Ideas of Bharatchandra, Rabindranath Tagore, Nazrul, Jibanananda... Writes poems, sings song, loves football. He walks on the high-street and observes people. He laughs alone, listens to everyone... The boy is very good. They are attracted by the opposite personality! The girl wants that her lover will be a modern man. The boy thinks that his lover will become as the mind of his. They are changing silently Losing individuality. Time flows. Love goes to another address... SANDIP GOSWAMI, INDIA
You're dressed in gray, and tattered like the clouds that hover above you. Frozen with the look of a person who knows of his own approaching death. Like the willow that cradles dawn's mist of unwept tears— a practiced sorrow, earned from decades of watching the slow meandering river, as it draws closer, and the banks weather and fall.
Sometimes between the lines, trembles the silence of unspoken goodbyes, expectant and charged, like a theater scene, in the moments before the curtain rises. In a dream that I've had, you are southward bound, so it must be early autumn, which, fades to sheer, then disappears..... Debris fills the gutters, and the shades are drawn Wild thorn-berries have been picked, all the branches are bare. And through limbs of old questions, and tall, knotted trees, Limbs filter regret with a light, between Leaves are adrift, as if disturbed, littering the speachless sky along with unfettered words, that clamor against the leadlight of a window, pleading to be heard. Crushed leaves are swept away, by a bridled hesitation. No summer aria has been sung, and the words go unsaid. Leaves fall straight to the ground, and the light leaves the world. The red velvet drape descends, leaving unfettered leaves, and unsaid words, bereft, in the dark. ______________________________________________ 7/29/14 For The Contest "Vibrant Verse" Sponsored By Charlotte Puddifoot
Only in a Different Life Looking through the window of a shop, I see you with a woman. She lifts long auburn hair while you, who stand behind her, are fastening a strand of pearls around her slender neck. I close my eyes envisioning. . . I've opened them to you facing me, and I'm the woman with the red-brown locks! You touch my cheek, and in your eyes I read an urgent need. You lead me to the door, around the corner to an empty alley. Our bodies press together. In the chill of night, I taste warm, wild kisses on my mouth. "Darling, my darling," escapes my lips, then suddenly my reverie is broken. A passerby has stopped to place a dollar in my cup. Murmuring my thanks, I gaze once more into the store where diamond rings and necklaces glitter like new snow beneath a winter moon. The man whom I could know only in a different life, who stands inside the store where I could never go, takes his sweetheart's hand, leads her past me pretending not to see a common homeless woman who yearns for so much more than mere necessities. (One of my very first poems posted at Soup. All I can see are congrats for being featured, so I don't believe it was ever in a contest!)
Another would-be life slips down a hospital sluice - a mangled tangle of tissue, a broken bouquet of limb buds. Carmine carnage reduced to simplistic statistic. But these hospitals are blanched mausoleum-white, operating slabs are sarcophagi, stirruped legs are strung high, and a crimson slurry seeps from between splayed thighs. Death-pimp doctors are gloved and gowned, loom grandiose, assume arrogance and surgical masks of indifference. Feminine thought frisks to freedom now: the biannual foreign holiday, career climbing and the company car. Birth is an inconvenient blip on the social calendar. Huddled horror-mute before my Philips flat-screen last night, peering through the fretwork of my fingers, a sickening frisson shivered through me; vertiginous waves breaking on my body's shore, faintness flooding my head. Today I cannot elude my abhorrence; it overshadows me, obliterates former complacency. Tonight people will be on the pull in club-clotted towns, and bedsprings will squeak a soulless sound as more life is made to be taken.
Anger flies with swift wings As tedious pleas for more time reverberate through his mind He is the servant of Time- yet takes the blame When her clawed hand unwinds the clock He, the sovereign of the dark, the one and only truth! Is at the front of the onslaught of screams He moves soundlessly, a shadow in the world Tormented whispers scattering around him Fear spreading wildfires' shrill promise Mercy, a withering carcass in a crude burial He became Hope's last regret When he became the prince of darkness, Forgoing all he once was, and all he could have been When he sailed away from home, his love for Time burned He had loved her, caressing her supple frame Faithfully staying by her side, And Time managed to wrap her cruel talons Around his frozen heart Dwindling him down to nothing more, than abject self-loathing And she trapped him within her bondage, for eternity Now he wanders, over and over again in his servitude A trapped guardian of the dark The fog horn groaned its complaint of "too.late" Under darkened sea that once birthed horizon And Hark! a maelstrom of black ink Behold its terrific evil and terror! A swirling whirlpool announcing you-have-been-fooled And the cries of fright forever ruled Scream in delight—"He suffers our fate…in pain we celebrate!" He no longer looked along the swirls in terror But was now part of its ferocious cycle Tears mixing with the agonizing laughter Amidst salty moans and tepid sweat Soon… exhausted by the chaos… he sank into a most foggy pit Ashamed, naked, barren of all past wit A cowardly frame, shivering in unknown terrain Inside a place where Time is gone…. But always looming in the brain…. As the errant fogs lift, The grizzled trees' feet curl in sensuous fervor of the cold He envies e'en the trees, with heartless relish of their misty exhalations Under shuttery breath he no longer truly breathes, … he sighs… Might I never reach the heights of even the mel-lowed fog? Shall I burn upon the dead leaves, rising only to fall? From that day forward, He wandered blindly Both loving and loathing pulsing tempos of silence "I'm still in love…" He whispers softly. "Oh how I am in love…" The dark that once befriended him almost smiles now… …then why do I feel so alone? The wind blows in almost an unnerving jeer A cool wisp enunciating Time's uncouth rejection For she loved no one, yet all Loving with a cruel wish to watch the other fall How many has she taken, he would never know For in shadow comes confusion and woe —and the voices he hears do not sound of his kind But who am I? What am I? A slave in Time's forever grind… 8/30/12 A very special collaboration with Rebecca Larkin
A path strewn thick with rusty leaves led to nowhere and everywhere in our fantasies, rescuing us from after school chores and homework pages wrinkled in time; a memory come and gone returns to me. Back home, under a row of willow trees, I weep for my childhood friend, for the innocence lost, I thought I could keep, for the faded line between joy and pain that suddenly comes with age; I close moist eyes to see you dancing in rain showers and climbing up rays of sunlight, imagination uncaged; running carefree for hours - just us, two, whether skies were shades of gray or blue. We said forever, a pinky swear I remember, naïve in our make-believe world. How many years passed by, distance growing between you and I? A phone call once-in-a-while became just a Christmas card once-a-year. I hope you always knew the truth, I loved you, my dear friend. Time cannot erase our laughter caught on the autumn breeze and the childhood secrets shared on that path strewn thick with rusty leaves, trodden bare each year come fall of winter snow. Our laughter now echoes in dreams, chaffing the row of willow trees still sulking low, moss brushing tears in timeless beauty, waiting for you to come home.
Blue – for your arm wrapped around my clavicle. I thought I would loose my breath. Red – for the cusp of our hip bones struggling to pull the drunken color from our orange cheeks. and our sweat, our sweat, our sweat evaporating in the drenched summer air. Our pants futile afterthoughts Left crumpled on the floor It is here I asked for your respect And you filled me with it. Orange – for the musk smell of our blanket den. I would watch the way dawn light speckled your shoulders, pale, white-blue Iridium. I would trace the ink of your skin, fingertip hovering a half inch from your bone. Green – for how my name would hesitate on your breath in brief puffs like dandelion seeds blown from My wistful lips when I was eleven waiting for them to bring back my wish. Black – for my sleeveless dress, as we strolled from your father's funeral. It was the only time I watched you cry. There were little holes in the cement sidewalk. They filled with rain, oil And your tears. I watched your face change through their watery colored reflections. Pink – for the way your skin repels from my Touch, quivers as though my finger- print were a red hot poker. You haven't allowed me to touch you In a year. Purple – for the color of her font, as she responds to you. It is an eager Color. She responds with all the passion of an Eskimo kiss. You left her waitng..always. I have been special to you, she replies to your overtures. Her letters Who blush like a maid Who's felt the hot moist whisper of something naughty tickle against her ear lobe. White – for the way your eyes punch accusations sharper then your razor tongue. They spit blue crackled lightening, like an angry alley cat. My words cannot reach you here. You will leave. We will divide our booty Words that once held my name like a piece Of carefully folded origami now hiss cold devoid like the plaster of our empty room. Grey- for the morning now knocking on my window. I am livid in my withdrawal, tossing and turning I can find no comfort in the tangle of these vacant sheets.
If I cry It must be the memory Of a skirt unlifted by a gust To still a boy's misery And wipe my eyes dry Of tears For the way time sears Us like flowers And reaped my mother Before I was ready to let her go. If I cry I cry for days she sheltered me From a child's web of fallacy And put her spittle on my knee Where bruised flesh Was a boy's view of tragedy. I would press my face Against her dress And feared no goliath Or loneliness. If I cry I cry for evenings on the porch When she gathered us Our feet white with blowing dust And hunger like a miner Drilling us We had so little to eat some days But she with prayers picked fruits Of heaven's mercy And we thankful ate together And heard her ancient anecdotes Of ancestors' exploits that floats Still upon a manhood sky. If I cry I cry that mothers' days are meaningless When the sight of flowers Are frail veils upon a grave And the customized Christmas cards Will not sparkle her eyes Just before the kiss upon my cheek Honoring me for faithfulness And knowing her love measures more More than a day More than the years that sums earth's decay. If I cry I cry for the love of my mother For the woman and life giver For God to bring Order to this unruly thing That spoons our purpose to a cup Swallow us Before the dusk with each sup Of time, diminishing us I cry for faith to hold my trust Against the agony of loss Death is a demonic disgust That makes me long To substitute all tears for angels song. If I cry Preserved my hope with brine of eye To live again Without death or pain And run with my mother Through the clapping ovation of summer rain.
GOD Wondrous of many blessings. Smiling never a frown. My prayers, Lord, are suddenly being ignored. I've taken a tumble of fallen down Lord, my life was plain and simple How did it come to this. Lord, now I carry a burden so deep A torn up life not easy to fix Hard to get my prayers before I sleep Bleeding only internally! Feeling very minutely! God, have you deserted me, or is it me who deserted you? God, my Lord, my savior, how could you abandon me? Must I drown in my own sorrow. Must I wake up like this today and tomorrow. Why have you left me, or is it me who left you? God, I need you like never before. When I wake up, When I head out the door. Tormented in a mood ring of stock Heavily my tears hit upon the floor. God, do you not feel me, or is it me who no longer feel you? God, what is your plan for me? What things did I not see? I asked for you to forgive me in my ways of sin. Why do you let him provoke me? Lord, I forbid for him to win. Relieve me from his gutless pain. God, do you not believe me, or is it me who no longer believe in you? God, do you not hear my call My pitiful excuses make me weak and small In your eyes I no longer feel tall I remain cursed in every single fall Lord, only you can break this wall Do you not see me on my knees Must I beg and crawl? I am at your mercy, crying out with grief Open the path to the lighted hall O' Lord, the day you judge me before your throne Please tell me it was a lesson for me to stand up on my own God for now I will end this talk With the dignity to never look back And ask if you were there on my endless journey of a relentless walk? By:PD
I was the object of your affection, Useful for a time; Lost in the ritual of loving The man I thought you were. How much of me did I give you In the gardens that tumbled over the wall? In the home that was your castle Where the inner layers of my being Lay exposed, vulnerable and imperfect? You took all that filled your own need And left me devalued in humiliating silence While you manipulated your scraps of power. Your love was the fantasy of possessing All that gives your existence meaning; Your illusions trampled the passion Tenderness and trust that was yours alone. With what do you fill the hollow inner spaces Of your being? Hiding behind the mask of greed; Unwilling or unable to grasp the anguish Of those who bear the consequence Of your flawed decisions. Those who have no choice; the victims That get in the way of your eagerness To continue your dance With the harlots of commerce. And I am alone, With the whispers of deprivation and denial. Processing the pain of what I am Who I was and what I might become Between the no longer and the not yet, Can I run fast enough to be me again In this world where the mirage of being Becomes ever more elusive?
"The October night comes down; returning as before Except for a slight sensation of being ill at ease I mount the stairs and turn the handle of the door And feel as if I had mounted on my hands and knees." ----- "Portrait of a Lady;" T. S. Eliot A golden afternoon, Late October, and my thoughts Are all of you, Suzanne… Vestiges of your being Appear on visages of A hundred different people; But none are you, not one As green, as golden. Hard it is to know no miracle Will mend, no giddy hope assuage, The scourge that slowly puts an end To our valiant green and golden girl. Memory takes us to days of indolence, Of innocence, of children lying on a levee, Deep in lush, green, summer clover -- In sunlight almost as golden As your hair -- beside a flowing river Bearing away our golden hours And the painless green of youth. Now, in your green room, reclined In shadow, our golden girl reposes. Your courage lights the coming night That does not dim the gold and green You always shared, and still you share.
Dear members of Poetry Soup, here I present my most awesome poem to date. It is best appreciated while listening to my mate Andy's recital. So please open- http://www.andyevansfiction.com/interviews/andy-reads-a-poem-called.html and read along. Here goes: DOUBTS When the sanctuary Of sunlight sinks And dark shadows Lay across your thoughts Spiteful talons Scrape against your reason Their dragging Resonating In your mind < > Out beyond your vision In the darkness of the hour Your doubts stir Shuffling Muttering Foul damning words That pierce you Slicing through your certainty Severing the flow Of your integrity Chill words Spoken so close They breeze past your ear And settle like ice On your dignity Threatening Menacing Sounds of movement so near That doubts brush Your confidence < > In the gloom These doubts Analyse Scrutinise Your every mistake Real and imagined Emphasised Magnified Demonised Your honest intentions Mercilessly proven Futile Trivial Infantile Your courage And Morale Shattered Scattered Lost in the darkness Surrounded by doubts < > Fearful Deceitful Doubts twist Blur reality Ripping Façade From hidden self Clawing Screaming Igniting fear Pupils dilating Stupefied Skinned Heart racing Blood Gore Torn from your chest Undesired self Splayed Exposed < > When the sanctuary Of sunlight rises And dark shadows Are chased from your thoughts Hopeful hands Massage your reason Their comforting Relaxing Your mind
He says Do you remember the time we… And she smiles Shared memories have no need for words Young and brave they chased their future Found their own crystal Eden ringed by sparkling waters It's in her blood this river of life A current that has carried them through love laughter spats and making up Carried them through life's precious moments Watching children grow Bicycle riding in trees Anniversary cruises to beaches kissed by the whisper of waves He prepares to leave Eden for true paradise where his Lord awaits She waits steadfast by his side Her place of thirty-eight years Their shared laughter bubbles along like a singing brook that cannot be stilled And she smiles For she knows someday in Heaven he will be thinking about her and say Do you remember… Her heart will hear his voice and she will smile as she sips coffee watching a pearlescent sunrise Shared memories have no need for words I just returned from a visit to Florida where my beloved aunt and uncle are preparing for new journeys. He has been put on hospice and she is facing a life without him. This is for Bob and Gail. I am blessed to be a recipient of their love and joyous laughter.
The room is still, Quiet but for wind and rain Making music on the windows. Empty but for endless shelves Of leather-bound volumes - The first editions you loved so much. The desk is weathered, coated In a film of dust. The chair is old and worn, Tucked in just where you left it. I can almost hear it creak Under your weight, Hear you whistle in that absent way. I can almost see you there, Hunched over creased pages, Reading Keats or Blake. I can almost smell that familiar scent Of fresh soap and musty books, Of spices and cigar smoke.
A Summer To Remember Summer exhausted, the fall chill begins in those first days you and I fell into each other as water into the sea sunshine was you, light was all me Winter's snows saw us meet its deep cold a team that danced in that icy glory sweet ink wrote our special story Spring, our lives embraced a great renewal beautiful pictures sought we out tempting each into adventurous journeys Summer returned, I found your shadow had fled our love emerged from its sheltered cocoon seeking love anew, its past left dead R.J. Lindley
A cold wind blows, turning hardened walls to sand. Breaking down the barriers exposing the emotions that were held inside. The pain builds, from hurts buried deep within. Storm clouds roll in dark, cold, and threatening. Thunder rumbles, roars across the darkened land. A voice breaking the spirit: Stupid Ugly Hated Harlot Die... the words echo through the ears. Lightning flashes, shattering the very heavens. Words drift through the mind: Unwanted Nothing No-one Useless Alone... casting shadows of doubt through the soul. The tears fall from the eyes, from a heart broken and battered. Rain pours down from above overflowing, unable to be contained. Then finally as the rage is spent, a calm stillness overtakes the cleansed world. In the arms of a friend peace is found once again. And a voice whispers to the night: "I'm alright..."
The moon's bow beckons to me, wind's frosty fingers entwining mine, and I lay myself on the balcony's ledge immersing, losing myself under that inky blanket sea the clouds rolling past, so fast, skimming like waves veiling moonlight, then letting it peek through like a shy bride beautiful, so beautiful a gentle glow of soul a silent lullaby that rocks me If only for a moment I keep my cradle of tears at bay, as I let the moon do the weeping for me. ---------------------------------------------------------------- Debussy's Clair de Lune now mingles in my mind like soft smoke and tears come streaming... Tired, so tired am I. 011620141114a137
Wont you find me here? Drifting in an expanse of swirling storm Outstreched fingers graze debris... recklessly circling reminders. Stand in the eye with me Hold This Ground. Lick our wounds rebounding Warriors victoriously smiting circumstance leaving wolves discouraged disparaging darkness with insane glee Walk here and find me Reach out think here You create me and I construct you Piece me in missing places Mending voids delicate and knowing I slay inherited growths of insecurity Stating truths untold to your beautiful ears Combine Know this warmth.... Let these branches sprawl grow in all directions to withstand walls closing in A grand old tree would remain...generations of our eyes taking glance from limbs strong and true You crush my cycle--end it's existence I'll destroy your boundary...kill it's constriction Our tower stronger and rooted Yet with loftier cloud grazing height lets disorient ourselves in this foreign altitude Touch this sky with me
. Did you close your eyes? Did you think of them? Memories come every year and I weep, alone and wondering if at the top and at the end you had a fear of heights as if the answer could make a difference. Yet I'm dismayed to watch it again, acrophobic, imagining... a room afire and the smoke making signals to the World no easy means of escape, no places to hide, no exit. Suffocated in that vision, I stay breathless trying to perceive... Hot gasses in red eyes begging for the luxury of fresh air a burning window and the fall-space: coin with just one side pieces of crystals in livid hands without time to wave sticky blood warming fingers in a last cold morning. And I weep, helpless and thinking in what you saw from above that pandemonium of alarms, yelling and the sound of the fire just an instant to decide how to face it, how to accept it an instant in which you may comprehend our brevity. Perhaps, you could say goodbye... Did you have time? Did you close your eyes? Did you think of them? in their faces, their eyes, their voices, their scents... Behind, below, inside...Death, waiting for your decision... And I weep for your innocence... for your panic...for you I'm with you now, terrified... yet, I can't follow you... But you drag me and I jump with you, as every year as the only way I can remember you...feeling you, being with you ... And I weep...recoiling to that morning that will live in infamy in its intense impact, in those images Because the towers disappeared in its collapse but you, through the years...you're still falling. Footnote: This short video is very disturbing; it shows people falling and jumping from the towers. I don't recommend you to watch it because it may offend or hurt your feelings. However, it shows the true horror of that day and I think that it's the true extent in which those innocent people lost their lives. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KcC6bTHosx0
Oh sky look down on this earth of gray, Something dreadful on the horizon looms. There is no black and no white today, Laws exist but justice is doomed. Morality is labeled religion, And must be separated from state, Whose own religion is political correctness And determining God's fate. Oh heaven rain down on us, Ae are tasting your tears. Yes we've become that bad, Confirming your fears, That what has been done , Is being done again, Those lessons taught, Coming to naught. Judges and laws make it legal, To be rid of your innocent babes, Under a symbol of the eagle, God's loving justice betrayed. Racheal you cry the tears, That now only heaven supplies, Because ours have dried, In the dust of our alibies. Excuses and lies are linked, As you and I know well, The truth is all but extinct. Truth is foreign to hell. Oh heaven, look down on this world of gray. Something dreadful is watching and looms. Is there nothing left but to watch and pray, While Rachael wails by the dumpster tombs?
untested waters ripple, strands of light flash in the beauty of my mind --- the past dwelt in the corner debilitating disabling untethering, I was thrown back in time (bad happens to the good and the good happens to the bad) visiting sins replayed in my head reminding me shaming me, the circle went around but I remembered the dashes of hope the splashes of love all that I had shared all that I had lost but going round and round the strings of sanity were unbound, the white rabbit called for me reality was paper dolls burning in the pit I held fast as the standard ripped falling into delusion I lay in the mire for a millennium clarity returned with a song the dance of life flooded my veins my being declared whole --- the clear untested waters of my mind ripple in wonderment, today has returned with no fear of joy
I wait patiently, and eagerly listening for your call. Was I such a liability to cause you to drift away like leaves in the fall? The temperature dropped 30 degrees that day. On that sidewalk I begged you to stay But you turned and walked towards the subway. Just like November you were suddenly gone. A man on the corner was playing the saxophone. I dropped a dollar in his hand and moved on. Without her I headed home. I watched the gentle breeze toss around a feather. It's during these times I wonder if we will ever get back together. The chill against the nape of my neck is not my type of weather. You were so cold. Your touch like ice, and you did not play nice. But I rolled the dice and suffered frost bite because loving you came with a price. My heart and emotions have been disassembled and rearranged. I wondered how strange?! Just like November everything seem to change. The holidays draw near. Everyone is in festive cheer. It's just not the same with you not here. Now days I stand facing the subway and I must say, I have this great fear. That just like November, I'll soon disappear. The chill still finds the nape of my neck from the rear. The man on the corner still plays the saxaphone. I drop another dollar in his hand and move on. But this time I did not head home, And just like November we're both suddenly gone! .
-For Melissa She asked me how long does it take to heal In what time allotment, exactly, will it take For forgetfulness to become a reoccurrence A blessing for the haunted Memories that can be bleached off White sundresses put on in order to frolic On beaches with waves washing away Each grain of him How long did it take for you to get over him? Days? Weeks? A month or two? Hope shining like a naïve flashlight during the eclipse of hardest times Beaming on me, waiting for an answer How could I tell her, honestly, That it took me years To overlook the smallest details of his smile How he only has one dimple on the right side of his face The way his hands felt, every line and crevice of his fate Thought to fit mine perfectly? How could I tell her, truthfully That no matter how many times I washed my sheets I would catch the scent of him at 3:45 am, sometimes Or hear his faint tapping on my window When it's really just, my imagination That she'll spend months waiting for him to text her Call her, email her, think of her When really he's lying in bed with another women but she refuses To believe that it's over Or how my heart still aches, just a little When I hear he asked about me Or that he can no longer say my name out loud to our mutual friends Could I muster up the courage to explain to her That it took me 2 years, 3 months, and 16 days to realize The ugliness of being pathetic It was time to rise up and take the lead Time to forget all romantic casualties It's only yesterday that I found myself straining to remember His faults, forgetting the man and only remembering the hero How could I break her heart for the second time by telling her The truth? She stood there patiently waiting for me To pull a metaphor out of a hat, something poetic Comforting, beautiful, reassuring I see myself in her Wanting people to lie to us to see the Zen in ourselves It's like we're all in the same play with the same roles but different names It takes time for each actor to fulfill the destiny Others emphasize while others downplay Moments in time
Pain covered by beauty, Standing behind a mirror of myself, Cut deeply by the shattering pieces as my true self emerges. Behold the truth that lies behind my placid eyes, The heart wrenching pain hidden by my laugh, I am what this world has made me to be, Cruel, Angry, Torn. Seeking answers in my mind, I feel there is no tangible hope. I cannot grasp what i have never trully believed to be there. I can only sit and wait for the inevitable, I can only sit and wait with no one but my shadow beside me, Daunting me, Reminding me how dark this world can be. Embittered at what my once joyful life has turned into, A blaze of hate and sorrow consumes me entirely, Until I am forced to relinquish the pain and tears built up inside me. At that moment I am rendered helpless, I open my eyes only to find myself embattled. These enimies of mine are not human but the result of what they have caused.
Tragedy is never a sentiment for Time For it is a phenomenon she merely sees She pours forth abundance for all that behold her Even for those of us that scold her And for naught she was cursed from the beginning There she is—interminable Time at the fullest! And we all envy her ever-ringing constancy She rules over our hearts Keeping stress in our spirits Not once does she feel sorry for us Nor is she indifferent of our failures She begs not for gratefulness And accepts who she is with joy! How ample we would be if we Like she—were free of trepidation If only we be like her waters—clear and visible from top to bottom Filled with untainted approval What fools we must seem to such a pure jewel as Time But ah, she is both heartless and kind And though we hate her peculiar aura Oh how hard it is do tear her from our minds! How stressfully beautiful Time is! Like a wink of venerated bliss She smiles and smiles And our ironical faces feel like grime Still she laughs in mirth While the world becomes a ball of putrid hatred Wanting more and more of her And positively hating her We that cannot see her began to hate For we are as visible and low as can be And we acknowledge her merely to insult her Though she takes no pang to the chest For the only gifts we give in return for herself are pangs That she simply returns to each sender Hidden is our pride But ever placed Ever unhidden Is our inscrutable mortality And this humiliation of our unchangeable fates Makes us want to humiliate the more fortunate Thus we regard her only as a concept As a fraction of a belief—a bellowing ideal For of course Time cannot in our honey-glazed eyes Think, eat, drink or feel We use her—yes! Even abuse her Not once will she complain For her gift is everlastingness
Into the mist which settles upon the waters Tempered elements connect and clash Each vying for dominance within their domain Lightning chases Thunder throughout forlorn skies The harder she cracks her brilliant, whip the further he runs In pain he roars through pitch black skies Man stands in awe of the battle displayed And the heavens hang low and cry pouring rain ~*~ Note: Inspired by "The perfect Storm" Very sad ending, yet, one of my favs.
A home The one he promised you That white picket fence Light flooded rooms A swing on a tree in the front yard He promised I'm sure he did He promised To fill it with laughter It was where you were both supposed to dream The gathering place of love Of family Of friends yet from the beginning It was a place of pretend A dark fairy tale Wrapped in a pretty shell In perfectly beautiful lines Curving away from you Then the cracks appeared Spreading with his lies You so desperately wanted to trust those eyes Thinking he was different from other guys Not wanting to see beyond his disguise No amount of renovations Can repair the cracks The essence of you under attack A beautiful dream painted black You can't You won't Put it together again Your house Your home that place of pain Helpless you watch it crumble Forced to walk away from it all The cracks too many it has to fall You have your answers You hold your head tall You see a future beyond shattered wall Still you wonder Will you one day find Your happily ever after Will the dreams you hold ever matter Will your tears turn to laughter For you Fairy tales are not enough You deserve a foundation made of better stuff Beyond your broken You find your dream Thankfully Wonderfully Amazingly God answers Both our prayers He gives you to me
As nighttime penetrates the boundaries of light fallen upon the eyes Darkness overcomes, no, overshadows thoughts of the day But we remember, yes, deep within the confines, we remember The morning brought your smile, fluttering upon The gentle stretching of the sun's awake You are highlighted by the sun, you are the sun I see through the covering of humanity To your essence of divinity And I smile at the beauty that is you Darkness, look not down and think you've overcome entirely For I still see, I still feel, I still am within the embrace of my love And she is daylight, that which never ends, perpetual life and light
strange it was there just the other day hanging about as usual, reminding me in my mirrored image of my definite femininity now gone, am I less of a woman? will you look at me differently, or strangely as I do myself? I never really gave it much thought before of how things come in pairs how lonely one would be without the other how misshaped one appears, no longer jutting forward, proclaiming sensuality thrusting into the limelight, now scars and a flattened ego, fill my robe, bras useless without stuffing men, look at me in horror, women in shock and pity and with gratitude, yes that it is not them my left breast is missing no not missing, taken, stolen... it was just a lump a few weeks ago a tiny pea shaped knob, that hid its cancerous intentions so very well, yet lay in silence waiting to steal away that part of me that defined who I was what purpose I served in society am I still a woman, a sexual being? I'm not sure, my right breast thinks so but yearns for its mate, the image in the mirror just doesn't seem right unequal in its proportions, glaringly lopsided my left breast is gone, surgically removed I can still hear its scream
When I am Colder,Older and then alone... I will collect the sky on my own... When the art has faded and the days then fade- when everyone has gone away... I may finally see what never was saw .....ahhhhhhhhhhhhh............... the quiet sky The unlit room which bares my end...shows the flashes of my pains my joys and sins. This life has been a strange one since the curtains were drawn These paper and plastic figures have clouded the dawn I was once younger,foolish,and obsessed with truth Now I am bitter,sour,dour faced with my heart under shoe The children were all searching or lost in a crowd All weeds in a garden...growing vile and foul Though beauty was sold it never came true Obsessions and vanity have traveled safe through Materials and poison and everything lost have been burned in the fires or lost in the frost I stand face to mirror tearing my being apart Winding thoughts of love,pain,god,and art As the sun sets and the darkness grows I too shall follow this pattern in tow Death has a friendly hand and a pretty face She has given me comfort as I leave this place The wars have occurred,humanity's lost Souls have been burnt in the fire or lost in the frost Day was Life,Night is Death And the latter has given counsel on my final steps
Who was he, Mother? The man you loved? The one you left To relax his guilt For not loving back? Who was he, Mother? The man who kept you heart? The one you replaced With the boy Who you couldn't love back? Who was he, Mother? The man who held your dreams? The one you thought of When the boy kissed And you couldn't kiss back? There is this man, Mother The man I love The one I left To relax his guilt For not loving back There is this man, Mother The man who keeps my heart The one I replaced With a boy Who I cannot love back There is this man, Mother The man that holds my dreams The one I think of When the boy kisses And I cannot kiss back I want him, Mother The man I love The one I want to run to The one I am guilty for Wanting to love me back
i peer through lacy curtains that night has sewn upon my window at footsteps that lead to you the stars weave themselves between the clouds of winter's loom a cold wind howls beneath the unseen moon a mother's lullaby i feel the hands of time gently tap from the edge of night and sanity i sit alone beneath the shadows and watch as my footsteps fade to white
I close my eyes and see, a river fresh and clean, memories from the past I open my eyes and see a river black and dead, realities of the present My hand winds back the reel, a fish struggles to be free... memories from the past My hand grasps at nothing, no fish exists in a trash-strewn river... realities of the present The memories just keep on flowing, just like the rivers of yesteryear, where children bathed among the fish, happiness sparkling in the waters. Now only tears flow there, where grief and death reign free... where wishes are as stagnant as the waters- yet a flicker of hope remains afloat... And when it drops, ripples of action may hopefully be formed to clean the rivers, revitalize it so it can flow in the future ***1.12.10 1213am written for Brian's "Flow, River, Flow" contest :)
We said our goodbyes in June, and the months since blur into mist. At unexpected moments, awareness of loss hits; tears spill unbidden. Family gathering, Christmas Eve as usual . . . minus one. We quietly exchanged gifts, found flowers from her funeral crafted into hand-made jewelry, kaleidoscopes, treasured mementoes. I cooked grapes today, dark muscadines. I extracted seeds and peelings, and measured life-sustaining juice through the metal funnel she used from the day of her marriage. It came to me dented and bent, like her body had been at 93. I still taste those fresh-from-the-oven chocolate rolls after school, garden tomatoes warmed by the sun, hot biscuits with apple jelly, squeezed from the peelings after she baked crisp slices in cinnamon-rich pie. I'm glad I didn't know then, about being allergic to Cinnamon.
Vainly I stand before you Waiting for an utterance Any word of understanding But these are days of famine The honeysuckle flow of verse, And kindness has abandoned No words can repair this ruin Too late, too late, to wait My memory of you will fade Yours of me will never be And thus is another chapter Of broken dreams and lost love
I close my eyes Orbits sunk deep within Scowering the cesspool of dream fragments. I lay cool against the flat sheet Waiting patiently for deep sleep to cast all dream fragments from memory.
Romance was not our muse, he types Not writes his farewells before each morning - A simple 'Till tomorrow' left by cooling sheets. We started as lovers, before we were friends Speaking in touches instead of thoughts Every night he clouded our secrecy With cigarette smoke, an ashtray beneath my bed, A counter of the days we were spent. But a playful joke turned bittersweet, I slipped My favourite glinting stud, a gift In his pocket lining, finding instead a reminder Of sin and silent lives, a ticket To home and back to reality. In dawn's light and an empty bed, I wrapped Bruised red lips around his fading cig, enjoying The lingering taste of him and his ashy breath. Romance was not our muse, I type Not write my farewells before the morning - A simple 'Good-bye' left by cooling sheets.
The trees are still there every morning Angry or sad The sun beats down through your pores Day after day after day. And the moon will never stop. And the spirit to which God has granted you Walks with you Penniless or pocketless. "Something was dropped along the way," You feel. "Well it's true we shed ourselves over the years, Pieces of ourselves everywhere," says the sliding Voice. Identity is really only something We think other people need. So we pretend like we're separate from each other. The word "firelight," is evocative. The bloom of spirit and desire and The ever-crackling of wild entanglement Our lives like firelight On the darkened beach from the young and warm light to the blazing chaos and wonder to the toking and smoting and dimming And the burial, and the cold. I am as sad as the bottom of a well. I have left something along the way. A small appendage, maybe, I had meant to use at some point. The Right Hand of God I was too distracted to keep hold of. I am all other centerless beings Dropping things here and there A pen. A thought. A conviction. And to keep hold, to press on staring redemptively At the circling Hands To live in this way is to gain wisdom And with wisdom there is always the healing of sadness. Senseless though, I know, like all else And the evering was and the here we sit Our eyes blinking tears from the bottom of a well. Tearing from our core for The love and need for others And their hands.
Primal, basal, beyond my awareness How could I have been so careless I let the line between real and fantasy Become clouded through my jealousy The fire rose, consumed, burned away And left the ashes in its wake I still search for just one burning ember To reawaken feelings of forever But destruction is all around I fall to my knees, hit the ground Can you hear me scream? Blatant, cold, and calculating Every part of this wrapped up in hating The one who did this thing to me Imprisoned when I was set free The water rises, to wash away All the promises we once made If still one ember ever burned It burns no more, lesson learned Still destruction is all around And I can't lift myself from off the ground Can you see me cry? Detached, impartial, contemplating Why am I here, why am I waiting Just what am I waiting for A broken window, an open door A key to tell me who I am So I can learn to live again Without the fear, without regret To bring back balance and pay the debt To clear debris from hallowed ground Unchained, but broken, I am bound Can you feel my battle?
In an effort to immortalize you, I gilded ocean size frames in gold leaf and painted your portrait with peacock feathers dipped in oils. I spelled out your name in bumble bee wings still quite attached to tame bumble bees hovering in obedience and formation in the sky I built a piano from felled red wood trees and carved your likeness on each key which I then filled up with ebony and abalone polish I traveled to Old Russia to the Crimean forest and pulled every wildflower up by it's roots and replanted them just for you, on the cliffs, overlooking the Black Sea. I tamed a black leopard and rode on her back 'round the world, with a banner, a list of your accomplishments flowing in silk for miles behind me, past onlookers reading your life. I sang gypsy music, as a siren on the wind while I wept and flooded each street with the depth of one tenth of the emotion you harnessed and kept at bay in your infinite quiet. I started with one person, your granddaughter, with your blue eyes her sitting on my lap, looking at me with a maturity past 3 years of age, and imprinted every memory of you in the air, for her to grab. You are not immortalized in portraits, or wings, or notes. You are not immortalized in flowers, or banners or sirens. You are immortalized, forever remaining, in the humble prayers of this innocent child.
on un-quiet graves memories grow flowers as time wilts your mind away geo.vuy. Jan.24.2014
Your season brought you to me You traveled on a winter's wind So crisp, refreshing, the possibility of you You floated lightly across my mind and into my heart It's as if you weren't real, then you weren't real As mysteriously as you came, you left Leaving with me thoughts of you; how you'd be when I finally met you ...kind, considerate, strong, thoughtful I'd imagined you so many ways... most of all, here I felt your warmth through your eyes; your smile But, I sensed sadness; a pain that I reached for to free you But I couldn't free you, but Him I could only make it soft ... until He came ... to lighten your burden ... and He came when I wasn't looking You knew and didn't tell me But, you tried in special ways and it worked I look back and still have you, but never did ... but still do ... signs of you ... feelings of you ... memories of you A season's memory
do you hear me when I cry out in the middle of the night? do you hear me when I grieve for a brilliant light gone out? do you feel me when I long for your love though your heart has gone still? do you see me kneeling by your grave unable to pray? do you still believe in me where ever you've gone and I'm here alone? do you see me gasping for breathe since the moment you left?
A lifeless body A hollow shell of what once was She once spoke with passion Laughed at a simple joke She loved fiercely An unconditional love She was so happy Shone brightly from the inside out But then it all changed She spoke scarcely They saw sadness in her eyes Eyes that shimmered with unshed tears What had happened to this girl Why had she lost her shine Now she lays motionless on the ground The blood pools under her She's curled up As if to ward off cold Written on the wall are bright red letters "I just wanted some one to care"
To be called .. ~ Grandma is a Honor ~ I have been blessed with 4 Grandchildren ~ one lays in Heaven " Kaleb " He is God's Angel ~ ~ His twin brother he will always watch over , and be in his soul~ For he loved his Brother so much in the womb , he chose Heaven which gave life to his twin ~ I feel his spirit when I see the other Grandson ~ Time passed another gift to see we are " Mickes" and Loved Our Dad held the title in Baseball ~ that's how we roll ~ those children are Grandmas hero's The Irish they love big and Family is everything The brothers will protect the beautiful sister ~ as many lads will be calling ~ Every time my Grandson hits a home run There will be a Angel watching proudly in the stand It will be as if the Angel lifted him when he runs ~no one runs faster then my Grandson~ either baseball or Art ~ you shall find your gift given These children have been blessed~ ~ a beauty to hard to describe If you think not ~~ Take a look at the Mom That girl can stop Traffic after raising three and still~ "Inspired by the gift and loss of Grandchildren " May our precious " Kaleb " softly rest where Angels only Dwell
Lonely I was when I stood staring at the sky Had a gun in my hand, was too afraid to cry Fought bitter battles and never lived to tell How at the altar of freedom, my body fell My soul searches for reasons as to why I died Did I save my people, had I tried? Do they remember me, my deeds, my name Are they proud of me or did I bring them shame My battered body stood testimony to my fate My heart had stopped in a battle brought about by hate I had screamed in pain, and shivered with fright But before I died, I did put up a fight Remember me, my beloved country It was I, my men, who brought you victory I fought to the last bullet in my gun I was a soldier, I was your son
He was always so happy strong and bold. He'd give you the shirt off of his back. Tough. Independent. He had a rough life growing up through the depression, but like he always does, he got through it. He has two boys, of whom he is so proud. Moved from Regina, to Victoria. He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted. But ever since his wife died, he has not been the same. Sad Lonely Empty. But like he has always done, he got through it. Mind slipping, just a little forgetful. That's how it always starts out... But like always, he powered through it, until now... He is not the same person that I used to know. He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind. Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes. He likes to play the blame game, but we know he doesn't remember that it was him. He wakes up in the night shaking with pain, tears streaming down his face. There is nothing we can do, Oh well... Two more tylenol. Hold on to hope for as long as you can, It's only a matter of time now. He gets vocal, a very loud tone. He'll block you in your room and make false accusations But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him. Tick tock, tick tock... You can't handle the stress anymore you have to leave. Just hope for the best, maybe it will get better. Surprise, it doesn't. Your denial is foolish, everyone knows what happens next. Sedation Medication Anger Hurt All results of dementia
The rainbow of reason ends With a pot of gold and jabberwocky. When hippocampus dwells in solitary, silent, eerie, forgotten dormitories of the expatriated mind. In planned visits To familiar spaces, When elapsed faces are still hailed with fervor, and hasty, eager, vivid candor, As though they had never gone. Deep in thought In cavernous bowels tangled lost, Remote repartees recurring restlessly. Cautious, wary, and ever leery of echoing footsteps anxiously nearing, as though someone might overhear. As even eyes fail to mirror The twilight of past vigor, Speaking in feeble voices muddled beneath walls, beneath walls, beneath walls, beneath walls. Walking politely in ancient, and empty, imaginary halls. The stars stop still and unfleeting Listening to last breaths, and the heart's last beating, To hearken timid last words from the past's last illusions, past apparitions, past veritas past delusions, Where celestial alae still go a-flutter with lost aspirations. When the frail hand that once held and sheltered Cannot even rattle dandelion clocks, Or crush delicate imago wings into dust, and caress, and feel, and touch, Save for Elysian veldts Where the rainbow of reason ends.
I'm half-way through this one.., and long before it becomes one, I usually erase the entire thing I chose to call a poem. But after a while, one thinks, That like energy, the truth radiates in spurts.. That continuity is a daydream, That all growth is involuntary, That not all coincidences are coincidental. ... Like things, people too die, and, that just like the root of a negative one, One too, was an imaginary i.
The sweetest sounds of burning trees A gentle stroking in the breeze The calm has lasted past the storm Cloudy visions, Satan's roar Too many sights have passed my way A time found only in the haze The softest screams are running bare My aching bones creak as I stare You walk a distance towards me The fall's eternal, can't you see? I'm a memory in your heart I whisper to you in the dark The battle's started at the end No one is coming to repent The sinners grab their wine from prey No judgment calling here to stay The sport is reckless to be told The one is laughing at his souls It falters nowhere to be sure The power grows forevermore Like a spirit in the wind I have no say in where you've been But cross the line to come to me And pay the price for ecstasy You walk a distance towards me The fall's eternal, can't you see? I'm a memory in your heart I whisper to you in the dark.
R.I.P. William Dale Eubanks d. July 1, 2012, aged 68 yrs., Tennessee Ridge, Tennessee Death came as no surprise the first Sunday in July; it claimed you, on a ridge in Tennessee, with kin who took you in and waited with you through the last hard days. You kept what fears you had well hid, did not betray with loud complaint the fate you could not but know awaited. A smile, a joke, a hug – exotic meals – And genuine interest greeted all you met. And you were, certainly, never boring but well-traveled and smart beyond the telling. We'll miss your wit, your bright demeanor, and will remember all you freely gave --- and what you took from us with your passing.
THE SKY Oh! Sky the lonely heart Dwelling upon my untiring soul Lost with an unspoken word. Fountain of misery teaches him That defiant endurance… Oh! Sky the lonely soul The creatures fly and obey But the hollowness prevails. The Sun burns him with anguish Yet he weeps with pride. Oh! Sky my undeniable hero You made me the undefeated queen, But I remained lost in my thoughts of isolation! Now I wish to merge in you Come my hero …my sky!
A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind For it is only an offense given to me by myself In the mouths of others far innocent than I I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake I am always inadequate in this brain I try to shine like the advice of grace given But confidence rarely rears its head my way There's a sort of shade blocking its way A shade that darkens everyday That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold I hate myself truly this night And no one but myself will give me the right The very right to degrade my every being Because you are not seeing what I am seeing There is no point My lines run cold Can I be so bold as to say I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt All feelings enter in As my truth blurs and checks out Your words pierce me so deep I cannot describe the pain I feel God it hurts so bad It can't be real Much like the love I have come to embrace The very love that links to your face Tears don't give it justice It can't be real Much like the love I will never face
I close my eyes and travel back when summer was still alive when waves crashed into rocks for fun, and winds blew kisses on our cheeks I remember seeing your lone figure, sitting on that wooden bench I asked if I could sit beside you No words spoken, you just made room for me We sat there for an hour Silence enveloping us It was the most tranquil time of my life It wasn't uncomfortable rather, the contrary two souls just breathing each other's thoughts and then it happened a word spoken… I believe it was "So" both spoken at the same time then laughter broke out and a waterfall of conversation just gushed over straight into kismet's paradise Everyday we sat on that bench for an entire month then you told me how that bench was so special… of how you and your father built it from scratch showing me your initials carved on the right arm taking out your Army knife you added mine that was the last day I saw you… 'til one misty morning I found a lone figure on that bench my heart leapt and fell hard It was your father, telling me you were gone then he showed me that tree stump from where that bench came from I never asked, you never said but thank you for that summer I open my eyes now and sit on this bench fingering the etchings of our names worn and faded, but still there…
I sift through his Taoist rants searching the brilliance and madness for something to make sense; to inspire. And he does not insult me with the dust of dead men though dust is what remains. Ash falls through my fingers, as promised, plenty of his own decay, pure and uncontaminated, his spirit whispering remembrance; his legacy blowing in the wind captured in my heart and lungs. ______________________________ *Loss contest November 3rd, 2012
The old screen door still welcomes me .. a familiar face, just as before but after this...who'll pass this way?…. Will they use the rug and wipe their shoes?... Swipe away the grime and mud? .....Or will they even care? I feel my pulse and lungs collide I take a breath...and step inside She lived alone, the last to go.... one amber dawn when skies were clear silently, without fanfare.... death wafted through these hard wood floors and took more than a glimpse of her I've been asked to sell the house, to clear it out, and set it right… Somehow, seems wrong…. a trespass on the throne of life that was softly lived behind the gate, where thirsty roses bloom, and wait… I hesitate…. to disturb the lace on drop leaf tables… disgrace the quiet of the gloom open drawers, snoop and sort, ….a pruning, of the good, the used, from worn and torn My hands are able, but my heart declines.. what isn't mine, to toss, to find, to mark, and label… I hear the echoes, in each room… along with swishings of my broom… and the dust motes in the window light like glitter in the afternoon… reminders of old sparks ingnited where cozy logs had offered light keeping her last nights warm..… The whirling sound of winds outside… whispered breaths of weaving looms the treadled sounds of sewing hems.. peddled feet, and bustling, rustling and those of clattering pans and potting blooms… There are questions I want to ask tho' I can't recall just what they were no matter now….with no one here I must be focused….on my task… it must be done… And now, …as doors of dark begins I see, somehow, that fate moved in…. I am glad that I, with my two hands… have witnessed with a smile, unplanned, A life once new, until the end I hold it all, and always will her life, I held in loving hands I stand here in the halls of night content, I'll leave without regret companioned by a day well spent… I've been within …her company ..............................................................................................................................
I am whatever you say I am... but, let's get back to reality... Three short years ago, this room shined welcome mats across a screen of doldrums. A place of unfamiliarity that screamed, "You don't belong!" Yet, a voice of reason spoke and said, "Expand yir' roots. Venture beyond the comfort zone. Academia resides inside that room, but know you won't be alone." Repeatedly,brainwaves declined what my wife and editor had told me. I'd say, "no way, I'm givin' up my soul for free, they read, they pay, like it's always been, the way it's going to always be!" Unbeknownst to me one day, and with a slight of hand, my "Open Sores" were put on display and surprisingly more than a handful of great ladies and nice guys began to give feedback on what I had devised. This interaction was something very new, helpful, and impressive. For a change, it was something real. For years, those around me were quick to give praise with hidden reasons. Constructive criticism is amazing, and I welcomed being corrected or set straight. Now there are those who choose to shut me down without explanation, and call me names. DO NOT mistake me for sophomoric! These words bleeding from my guts have no style and need no approval. There is no thinking involved here, no plan. If you don't like it, fine...don't censor or bracket me in. So what if I am illiterate? If you don't like "street poetry" or the pathetic stuff I write, don't read it. If I offend you, tell me. We should welcome those who are different than us. Words of truth inspire movement, like fire. I came to this room to expand my horizons, step outside the box, learn, help, grow. There will be no apologies dealt for being different, or for being labelled as something uncomfortable to you. This has been an ok room so far, but there is some clique trickanery going on. If the dictionary must come into play, let me recommend looking up the term "Poetic License." True, I may not be the writer you prefer, or aspire to be....but tread carefully my friend, for you have no idea of my profession. I've made a fine living, for a good long time, spewing words onto paper. I came from nothing, and may still be nothing to you...still, I do what I love, have no boss. I am not an aspiring writer who dreams of a life, I live my dream. In conclusion, I must wish you luck in finding what you peddle poetry for. Until then, keep
Quiet and still now. The swing occasionally catches the air. The tire never moves. There's no one there to care. The jungle gym beside it is played with by squirrels. The sand box below holds creatures quiet and shy. Tiny plastic men are lost in the sand deep below. A metal car is with them, once favorite of them all. Leaves stir in the clubhouse, with spiders in its loft. My son hadn't played with it for a long, long while. But I hadn't noticed while he was here running in the house. And now when I see the Wooden Swing Set… It's connects with my empty heart. A touch of Empty Nest Syndrome brought this poem to me.
The moon so bold seems cold with a halo of midnight glow I sit mesmerized as the night grows old. I bleed still, even after all these years and I wait again through the night aching in the depths of my soul that no other seems to know the Loneliness that has become my companion. In the darkness we wait and confide in the other our deepest fears as memories fade in and out each season of change the nostalgia tempers the wars of pain this tempestuous foe of ours wails at the gates of midnight howling the warble of humanities last grace. How the comfort of minds and hearts turn from light to deep dark in the face of eternities long time clock... I ache with wanting, with need and passion it is a lie that time heals and wounds scar each night is fresh like the first when I faced realities shock. Who can wait with me? Who can hold this hound at bay? Who can cherish what little love left in me and make the broken whole? I ache to be loved again as the love that burns and waits inside of me. Who can comfort this emptiness and fill the void that so many leavings have left? Cherish and love to honor and protect but who can slay these demons that hold my heart in wrath? Who will walk the sulfur clouds of hell to save my mind and deliver my world to the gates of heaven with life, not death bridging the distance of pain? I sit and wait at the floor of the moon each night waiting for that bridge to carry me yonder, this moon who hangs heavy and ripe with the yearning of my soul with clouds aglow as if I could sweep them across a canvas with the brush held in your hand I rage at her as I wait, but still I wait and weep as Loneliness and I keep each others company wishing the clouds of that great moon could truly create a way to find the lost, a pathway to home, lit by the legacy our love.
Of dust, of dirt; suspended, lost, remarkable. Of no merit; forgotten, under the tall trees. And bury him; No accurate history serves. Under cross; buried in sand, buried in dirt. His face will carry forth, past this miserable state. To birth, to die; forth not. Behold; of man, of earth. Of dust, of dirt; suspended, found, frozen in time.
I have a goodbye in my pocket spelled out on plain blue paper The blue of the tiny flowers in my grandmother's everyday dishes I had to tell her goodbye though woefully unprepared The word would not pass my frozen lips so I settled for blowing to her a soft feathery kiss The blue of my first love's eyes on a stormy day at sea The rain mingled with my tears when we realized some things aren't meant to survive passing of years I stumbled over the word I needed to say and I lied This is an intermission only a trial We will reunite Melancholy blue Goodbyes seem to be spoken in the dark The end of hello The end of the light See you soon on a sunny afternoon So long is merely a mellow dusk Soft words so easy and flowing But we always struggle with goodbye I don't want to be left standing awkwardly with a sad smile pasted on my frozen lips and lingering much too long I wrote my goodbye carefully in somber blue and tucked it safely into my pocket Over it I have grieved and cried The time will come when there is only one word left to be said I will gently hand over my goodbye accompanied by nothing but a breathless sigh
KALEIDOSCOPE Say unto wisdom, thou art my sister and call understanding thy kinswoman. Proverbs 7:4 Wisdom flew out the window as the clock struck sixteen minutes after midnight on an October night in 1973 It soared away on feathered wings of blackbirds cawing of death carrying the message to streets and by-ways of childhood The entrance to the avenue of innocence barricaded by birds weaving an impenetrable barrier of lost dreams and half-grown shadows Understanding slid into creases in rumpled bed sheets and was lost when my sister flew home to Heaven Shrouded by a fog of sleep I dropped my kaleidoscope shattered childhood's innocent hues cracked prisms of dreams She was the older sister She took wisdom with her when she left leaving me with years of making wrong choices She held understanding of my fears hopes dreams She alone knew my desire to be a nun and knew I wasn't Catholic We were saved together baptized together I morphed my dream of entering a nunnery into zeal for ministering to people in far-away lands Instead I spent too many years chasing chips of colored glass that held fragments of an innocent lost love My dreams drowned as I swam through seas of alcohol Youthful shadows lost forever in a haze of pot smoke I tried to build a kaleidoscope with shards of glass but the prisms were lost inside my LSD induced nightmares My age not my memory tells me I was a teenager once Years of lost moments and wrong paths taken where I only circled back endlessly on myself Time tumbles along like prisms of glass in a kaleidoscope The cha-chinking of colored moments ever changing I spun like a top on my pivotal moment lost sight of my destiny Yet somehow I meandered through the maze picking offshoots of wisdom compassion understanding tucking them like little wild daisies into my hair I found the words to speak of what I learned in this language of poetry that travels to far-away lands
Always cold in the morning, this kitchen is warmed now With a roaring fire and my wife working beside me making just desserts We stand here two hours this afternoon doing one of our projects Cooking soup and fish for this evening's xmas party of friends. The ghetto, the Projects, contained me with the music of The school's leather belt and cane. And then Parents lost in a fire. That was a tough xmas, alcohol boozy flavored in an Empty-bottle kitchen, crowded and smoky. It was a tough meat just cut today red blooded, now pale in the friends' Xmas gift, the tureen shiny clean. The soup's Alcohol flavored in effort to disguise taste of the firm onion, now soft slop. Next, must Empty bottle of sauce in …add spice…Oh, now chop more veg: and the Kitchen knife peels and reveals their secret inner fleshes, Crowded and jostling with juicy tomatoes, now reduced to wrinkled skins; and Smoky, tall, erect celery now chopped into mini-sets of false teeth Innocence lost in the poisonous smog of Dublin's Orphanage hymns and anthems: God and the state will help Uniformed religious staff and teachers to tell me I do not belong - I must reveal no secrets about being Woken, shaken out of bed, taken (with no word spoken) from the Cold dormitory, scaly hand on my knee: Drown in this grasp - fish out of water Cold. A small shivering fish caught in net, taken now from its fridge Dormitory for this sacrifice: staring, unfeeling, cold-blooded creature, its Scaly skin shining on my cutting plate. Hand on knee, I sit down to gut it, gills first - which made him Drown as he struggled in the tightened net; and In this grasp I cut the fish open - an old Fish which was still feeling Out of water. It seems a silly, scaled creature now, lifeless, staring at nothing. I lost my loneliness from that hostile world: She gave me peace and serenity - Warm feelings of belonging ; and it's Christmas every day. She is sweet, inviting, colorful, and around her Melt-in-the-mouth music plays. She is the essence of sugar, Sweet free-running chocolate, Inviting me to dissolve all of her creamy meringue shells Colorful and delightful, which will swirl Around her taste and Melt like love on a summer's day. In the mouth of my hell, she has uttered Music, and forever now, it Plays sweetly. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Written for and entered in Debbie Guzzi's Contest GET SERIOUS
Her head tilted back towards the darkened clouds, Mocha curls rests on shoulder blades, Lids shut tight hiding emerald eyes shedding crystals, Water rushed from the grey sky, Shades of ulysses butterfly flooded over flesh, The drops pierced her tender pores, Seeping under her pale skin, Merging with her spirit as one, Then remained.
My memories of you were never really lost Though fading more in every season's turn But I've found at last the nook in which they hide Deep down in forgotten quarters of my mind In a spark my thoughts repaired The bleaching color of your smile and now you are so clear within my heart I realize with the breathing summer air That our memories are scattered everywhere I see us soaring with our kites And our beings dancing with the sultry breeze Within a glance I also see us in the sand With love prints we have left behind, Along with the yearning waves For the promised kiss they'll cast to shores When I peek at our once-shared bungalow My memories there strike me with awe How our love fuels us through the night And how your craving touch tickles my heart The way we fill each others crevices Detonated pleasures sleeping in our flesh And the way we sway in frenzied heat 'Til we reach the skies in sweet delight But one night the envious heavens make a plot With the conniving rain they extinguish our flame I don't know how to recover from pain When you are taken by the jealous rain But I know your spirit still exist As to our appointed star still shining in the west
Defiled by the city lights, the stars no longer shine so bright. I can't try to count their numbers, or wish upon their falling beauty. Life is dulled deep in the night by the bustling busyness, the need to succeed, to forget about the splendor, that we can no longer see. Nature is destroyed as industry progresses day by day, and every night I'm mourning, because the stars have faded away.
Sunday night Apr. 8, 2001: the night I slept in relative peace foolishly, naively believing and falsely assuming that all was well… But then the morning after: though not the worst morning after still the numbing, paralyzing morning after the morning his voice seemed far away as if it were an eerie, drug induced dream the morning he regretted to inform... (For a precious few weeks one hibernates, wrapped up safely in that protective cocoon of sweet denial and disbelief) No, the worst morning after came: after all had been said and done after basking in the glow of sympathy after the admiration of my iron will after all returned to daily routines after I found myself alone again… Oh no, the worst morning after: was the morning I startled awake to find that monster standing there that monster who pointed at me and told me the bitter, brutal truth the awful and merciful truth of God the truth that you are really gone and are never, ever coming back…
I came upon an old man, A homeless, wretched soul. He looked so sad and helpless, In his hands, he held a bowl. He was propped against the building, So, his weakness would not show. He saw the world through glasses, With hair as white as snow. I heard my father whisper, As my eyes filled with tears, "One need much more than money, One needs his loved ones near." My father loved his family, Does this old one feel the same? With my father's soul beside me I asked the old one's name. His name, he said with feeling, Was lost with all he owned. A thief assumed his identity, Then, all he had was blown. His wife died in December, The vulture, then closed in, Pounced while he was grieving, Then, his life changed again. I gathered the frail body to me, Spoke kindly, acknowledged his need, A home and a heart full of loving, My family would plant the seeds. Love is the first to be planted, Followed by trust in their care. My father's spirit surrounds us, His example taught us to share. The old one lost all his pallor, With love and trust he gained More than he ever hoped for, Another family, who gave him a name. Grandpa, we decided to dub him As we fought for all he had lost. As he won the last legal battle, His life was the price that it cost. The old one wanted cremation. My mother did not and she prayed. Next thing we knew came a lawyer, And the Last Will and Testament played. My mother, for once, became speechless, And I drew in no better air. Grandpa was there in the picture, Leaving us undisputed heirs.
She never did come back home that night Me pacing the floor Walking for miles in search of her Leaving me torn apart Spewing with the turmoil of wondering Just what happened to her Who had she been with and why? Engraved on to my mind her name etched in my heart her love, her sighs Spiking my tongue her name cries out My heart splinters my gut receives another jolt God I loved that girl and didn't even know for certain until today But now it is too late I left it too long to proclaim my love for her afraid of the pain which comes from being knocked back still even that is not as I suffer now in the whispering of her name I look in the mirror yet see her reflection stare back at me smiling and tossing back her flowing locks her very presence is felt in abundance Her huge eyes dark as purest deepest sapphires class more expensive than purest diamonds with a charismatic magnetism radiating out overwhelming all within reach of her personality Stolen from this world she was No notice to anyone that she would be leaving Nothing makes sense anymore And I long to know if we shall meet again Some new day in a realm beyone ours Another time another place I'll wait for her as I hope she will for me For true love will never die Based on a true story from Christmas when a young woman went missing - found murdered... My thoughts went to those around her and inspired to write came this, but I have changed the girls name for the sake of those that knew her... So sad to still have these things going onin our world...
Hounds from Hell take their toll on your soul as you walk the mainstreet of mainstream and watch Saturn and Neptune dance to a simple tone of silence in the outer space. As you sit in the middle of the world alone; free yourself from the sense of hopelessness, only see yourself in the mirror of deception as your reflection laughs at you and looks right through you, and doesn't have remorse for what it says or does to you. Hounds from Hell take your soul, chock you, cut of your air, the smog and fog blind you in the city of ash. Hear the hounds from hell howl for your soul, go now, barracade your soul behind sins and temptation, Alone, listening to your soul die away, watch love go away from you, with suitcase in hand, picture frames broken and collect dust through the sands of time. Till the cleaning lady comes on Monday, to clean the mess that you left behind. You are gone, without a trace of ever returning. Looks of the Hounds of Hell came for you and stole you from comfort and warmth, till the sorrowed heart cracks and pain spills out and you look at it all spill out over the floor. The Hounds from Hell have paid a consumable harmage to you, and your rich soul of sorrowness burns away... slowly. Fear darkens souls, innocent souls burn with a new day, a slumber that has no end with nightmares haunting every light of hope there is left in this desolate Wasteland. Fear and darkness tears a hole in the darkened universe and we all go to hell to see the Hounds, who come for us all. The graveyards fill, and death guards the tombstones of the dead, and the flowers burn away on the feet of the dead. -10/14/2013-
The voices grow louder, Intensifying with emotion, anger lining every aggressive word. My insides squeeze tighter as the vitriol poisons my mind, How does such hostility exist? As the sound of hatred deepens, The feelings strengthen their grip, like a vice, So tight, I can no longer breathe All the negative emotions I have ever felt, fill me, Threatening to overflow. So long have they been banished… Enough. No more! My mouth opens, An earsplitting scream of pain and suffering shatters the silence, Sobs of sorrow and grief wrack my body, Murderous shrieks of anger and hate, Wretched cries of self-pity and self-loathing, Poison the air. Now, free of these emotions. But the monster still exists Within the dark depths of my mind.
Hearts mangled by grief Lost in separate mazes Cooking a half-hearted meal A turn of the head, a quick glance Trembling hands reach out... Right hand in left, a gentle waltz to sweet soul sounds on the radio We danced in the kitchen Then hold-your-baby-so-tight Hold-your-baby-so-tight-crying-song Swaying to Harold Melvin and the Bluenotes 'If you don't know me by now'... Tear-soaked necks and shoulders Melting into each other Melting and blending into one We danced in the kitchen Oh how we danced How we danced to the moon How we danced to the dawn How we danced in the kitchen Sweet Jesus let it be so Let it be so again Let the music play on Let us dance one last song Let us waltz one last waltz Let us dance in the kitchen
Drab pigeons in flight, skimming over the streets Swift, restless movement, but going nowhere Cleaving curved wings in the hot and stagnant air While no one takes notice of a gray day's defeat They circle and settle, no rhyme or a plan They perch, then depart, feathered gypsies who roam Chasing the shadows, surveying the land They scavenge the streets, for a place to call home Summer that coils between cracks in the concrete Liquefied smog brews far deep in the bone Pigeons fly low, testing virtues of streets Assemble in flocks, yet must forage alone Searching at feet of the crowds who walk by Waiting for nothing, just a crumb from the sky ….. Drab men walking circles, slouched over with scars Their only companions are ghosts of defeat With no place to go, except under the stars They huddle in corners, as the bitter night peaks People and traffic are pounding the beat No one gives notice, while they travel not far Down sidewalks, and litter, in the noise of the street Like pigeons in circles, where home is the dark Summer that coils between cracks in the concrete Liquefied smog brewing deep in the bone And gray absent eyes, testing virtues of streets Just litter on sidewalk, where cruel winds have blown Searching at feet of the crowds who walk by Waiting for nothing, just a crumb from the sky ………………………………………………………………
World is amazing,as described by philosophers but...what actually in world is amazing The suffering,of those caught by the waves of fate. Why there are rich and poor, god could have created only rich! Then why did he do so,to make the world balanced. Rich can serve poor by loving them and giving them, so they are blessed with more. Poor can survive with the help of rich. Balance which is needed,created by our god...but, is it followed ? Rich are becoming more rich and poor are still in the hands of poverty Condition of world is wonderful. God, fooled by the rich. The balance of world is lost.. World fears god...its shivering is heard in many parts. Help the world god.....please..
How can one express the baffling depths of obscurity? How can one behold to open the shafts of the mind? I have never been able to solve the mystery— Of myself. . . I wish at times that my life was no more That I could live as another and finally see things right But I am always stuck in this darkness And I cannot see this mind in light There are beasts. . .demons prowling through the wasteland Searching for any remaining life And if they are ever found— They are doomed and consumed Fear is their downfall and they never fail to smell it Their ashes remain, dancing with the imaginary breeze It is silent here—there are no answers I wish there were answers. . . But maybe there was never a reason No answers. . . Talons extend and clench around my heart They will never seek me out—they left me here It is like they knew…I had no reason—that was the answer I feel the pulse of my dangling life Alone in the dark, whimpering like a child I have scared myself, becoming this dragon-daggered youth No balm in Gilead! No eyes to see All I know will never be free I don't need anyone! You are a disgrace—scum of the waste! You have everything, you ungrateful little nothing You are a joke. . . So swallow it all up like the pushover you are Stand your lowest and trudge right through No questions. No answers. Just . You. Or just lie back down into the mush of disease It has already infected you to the core Accept who you are, you ugly pestilence! I hate you Who are you to be glorified? Dream snatcher. . .murderer of all things bright Saturated in what you call light I see right through—even as the reflections shatter All of the dead kept you alive—they all matter… But alive you are the worst there is False savior—edited attention whore I never want to see your face again See, that's why I hide. . . Desperation. . .desperation. . . I sob and cry kneeling in defeat For once I am right. . .I am right
Standing before the great water's roll... Lost within a dream of greatness... Breathing in slow. . . Exhales more like whispers.. The burning sun had given way to the calling of night... The gathering of stones, cool and ancient... Collecting the sea's sadness... As the last flicker of light fades until the chiming of tomorrow, I look to the night sky... There she is found... In the shifting shadows of the moon... A thousand departures created the void... Releasing the hold on today... With outstretched arms, I fall into the mist, the fog and the ocean's call.....TAH
Through the Mist It feels like a lifetime has passed since my beloved I last saw, Bedecked in shining armor, my brave Geoffrey did gallantly gallop, Riding his silver steed, through a soft silky blue morning mist That like a tender lover enveloped and amorously embraced him. Now overtaken by dark despair, silently willing my love to reappear, Despondently I peer through this most mystifying mist, realizing that On this fateful day twenty years before, he had unwittingly succumbed To its seductive allure because man and mist had merged becoming one. Date: 8-21-2014
Arms crossed, pacing back and forth poking and prying in every corner peering in closets, turning on faucets humming softly and talking to yourself You glanced back at me and smiled knowing you had found our place our place to grow old together our cottage in the wood I live in our cottage in the wood I live in our cottage alone Look at it now Look at this place Look what has become of it Look what has become of me
He laid flat on the floor On the edge of his mind's cliff Taking notes Wondering Was this life worth living He tried to remember Grasp onto Happier times Shadows of light Fluttered beyond his grasp Teasing Evaporating Hiding Figments wrapped in glittering paper Promising Tempting Geometrically angled Away from him He felt the coolness of the tile Terracotta pressing against his forehead Soothing Absorbing his fever Steadying him Whispering Promising relief "Let your blood accentuate my redness" " I will protect your bones" Light flows through stained glass Christ's brilliant blue eyes Piercing the man's sadness Reassuring him There will be more days Brighter lights Warmth not clay Sadness left to yesterday The floor will not be fed today It is washed with salty tears The edge vanishes Was it ever here? One moment Graciously Turned to years He sits in a pew Looks up away from himself It now seems so clear He gets up Walks across the floor Walks out the silent door Decides once and for all He doesn't need Or want This horrid place Any more His heart is healed God goes where he goes The suffering he lived no longer grows What he remembers sets him free He will not be lost to history A life of Joy not misery. Dedicated to native children abused In church and residential schools. Their culture systamaticly stripped away. in some cases much worse things happened behind what should have been hallowed walls. Contest Sponsored by Shanity Rain "Native American People" I was initially reluctant to enter the contest because I questioned if this was honoring to the native population. As I thought about this I realized that it speaks to their resilience as a people and despite what was done they continue honoring their people and their culture. We have much that we can learn from them.
I look in the mirror, I gaze at my eyes and see my soul, No longer a pure shimmery white light I once had as a child, Now it is stained with red ink, Absorb inside my skin, Like water soaking into the earth, Not even my atonements can wash away the blood. So now my soul stays poisoned, With the evil destruction of my past, And the beautiful white moon I once had, Has disappeared, Tainted the black holes of sin, Though light overcomes darkness, I still see the discolor of my soul, And the infinity of its presence, Lurking in the dark, like a bat in a cave, So now I stay longing for the once untouched purity of my soul, That has now vanished without a trace of a memoir...........
As you sit in your car All dressed in black. You know, It didn't have to end like this Now as you think back you remember The faint white scars etched in her fair skin And the timid smile that hid years of despair You remember that time your friends saw her crying in the hall You sat there and laughed as they tortured her The times you saw her sitting alone at lunch She looked up at you with pleading eyes "Hey, can you help me," they said. You thought about it , but instead you pretended you didn't see her And you left her there, sad and alone That pleading look now haunts you It begged somebody, anybody for help But why should you commit social suicide for her? You just kept walking away, selfish Now though, you think back to those boring assemblies About bullying and what it could lead to Why didn't you just listen?! Maybe you could have spoken up, or found her help Its too late now though, as you walk up to her casket To say your first and last words, To a girl, whose real name You never cared to learn "I'm sorry…"
Inhaled at the age of innocence, with a breath that lies between stars, with immortal depths that have no ending as my lungs forever expand, Exhalation has become unachievable, due to the obstruction of faith of a boy for his very first dream, Chest heaving as a heart aches, Is love a tree or the deepest ocean? My breath or my reason for holding? The questions unanswered since the dawn of man and emotion alike, Thus the bittersweet conclusion appears that love equals the two, Yet how does such beauty create a pain that suffers from insomnia? Expendable only to a few torn souls who have breathed the sweet intoxication of love, and caressed the linger of its enticing aroma, and suffered the sting of its departure, Leaving hearts which cannot withstand the agony, to exhale affection for everything in its entirety, crushing the hope of such youths, yet this warning takes nothing from its appeal, For to breathe love, is to touch enchantment, As romance itself in but a breathe shared between two spirits rewarded for persistence, With the risk of being proven fallible, which leads to tears and pain entwined, Must we not embrace the risk as reward? For those as myself, who answered "no" are condemned to the most fragile breathing, For each breath hurts like the last One love, one lost, one breath in all, Breathing her in as if she has become the last breath of oxygen in my life, For she has, she has become my only, due to a choice made for the perfect love, Yet my painful irony has become, breathing and loving, with each one, keeping the agony of the other alive forever
We don't know something special until it's gone Even when it looks us straight in the eyes A gift, an opportunity, a friend or even love Hovering, ever present to the point of screaming Oblivious, not seen, not realised now lost Like a flick of a switch you suddenly realise What could have been has just given up
you can love in a just a single moment so deeply that the loss is felt for a lifetime it doesn't take time to form love's bond sometimes it is immediate a connection of heart and soul that defies logic or explanation these thoughts crowd the mind as flowers she lays among her memories silently filling petals with tears for blue eyes now closed forever gleam brilliantly smiles given so eagerly with tiny lips of kisses still hold her heart captive so she lays a white rose for every day that her little girl blessed her with her presence and one red bleeding rose to represent the pain of her loss for even in the agony, the joy far outweighed the pain time means nothing when you love the gift is to love at all...
I guide my body, but my soul I do not. My mind. My feelings. They've slowly broken apart. The darkness screams at me, trying to reel me in. "they're gone," they say. "you're nothing but pitty and sin." Though most think it's hard to step foot in this place, it takes true strength to find another way. As the black swallows me whole, I see a million bright lights. I lay there in my sorrow, and know the stars are mine tonight. Somehow they -- uniquely twinkling -- take my feelings on adventures to slow my breathing. They strongly look through me, and have my mind soaked with things like courage, and happiness, and hope. I lay there for hours until their vivid wisdom fades. the dreadful transition of night to day. When the sun gradually peaks over the horizon, I notice the pain in my hand from clenching my knife. But as the light shines upon me, the only feeling I have is the feeling of life. I stand face to face with the greatest star of all. Feeding off of its power, I break down my wall. The sun shows me the paths that I have to choose from, but it's up to me to choose the right one. I'm ready to cut ties with the sadness I hold. I shall live my life right and pick the right way to go. I'm eager for night to fall, to show them that they were right. They all found their way. The stars are mine tonight.
Broken Butterfly Wings Empty playground swings tear filled, wide-eyed Infants sigh a choking stolen silence fills my being as my love walks away from me I see everything wrong with the world once more
It has been almost three years since to heaven you did fly We miss the beauty of your soul now you share it with the sky... Heaven now knows the warmth of your heart So bright you put the stars to shame the glow of Springtime's sun will never be the same... Our son has the strength of your soul the passion of your heart with much to share in his eyes your majesty of the cosmos like you a love of animals with much to spare... My love add your wonder to the stars enhance the blue of the midday sky we miss the unequaled shining light and the tenderness in your eyes... Soar all the way to heaven my lady for eternal love has set you free I await here among the living for you to greet me in heaven splendidly.. ~ ~
The evening star glowing in a dust choked sky. A girl stands by a window, with a tear in her eye. She stares at the scene, hardly visible through the grime. She whispers in the wind, "Bring my Dad home this time" She opens the window, and climbs outside, Having a flashlight, in her hand, as her guide. Its glow shows the sides of the street. She's afraid for what the light will meet Bodies piled everywhere she turns, She wants to go home, and never return. What brought this fate upon her town? All her emotions are stripped and torn down. A frightening sound explodes in her ear. Shadows in the road now appear. She run and hides behind a broken wall Praying to god the rest doesn't fall. Footsteps coming closer to her She can't tell who because it's all a blur She backs away further so not to be seen in light, Quieting her heart pounding from fright. Gun shots and screams fill the air, All these sounds, her ears couldn't bear. A slight whimper slips from her lips, And over the broken stone she trips. The shadows run closer, showering her heart with fear, She wishes they would just disappear. They pass by her; she fills with delight, She just wants to see her dad tonight. She shines the light, to show her place, And to the shine comes a familiar face. She doesn't understand who's to blame Because on the tag shows her father's name. She holds in her tears and refrains from crying. She falls to the ground where her dad was lying. She lifts his arm and buries her face in his chest. She closes her eyes wanting to forget the rest. The shadows emerge yet she doesn't see, How close the end for her would be. They look down at her, aim, shoot, and fire. Being with her dad is her only desire. The night had ended causing a little girl harm But she took her last breath, in her father's arms.
Ephemeral Tis not mystifying, though disheartening, that we are simply passing shadows …. a mere breath exhaled…. transitory Sunrises numbered at first drawn breath though each stand of hair is lovingly counted A lone flower in a field of waving grass will pass unnoticed, once flourished. The wind becoming the only witness, to its existence, as its scent is carried across the meadow....fragrance dissipating Swift waters of life slowly-- but surely-- wear away our most precious of stones their features gently altered with time until the final last grain deteriorates finding rest, peacefully, on a distant shore NOTE: This poem was inspired by the book of Psalms as well as Nature and MY FAITH.
Sandy grains wash over and over a discarded glass bottle leaving what is left smooth as silk to my fingertips touch like a childhood memory thought over and over once more and as I look out into the unyielding sea I recall your promise words I recall, over and over again like the waves splashing my tan feet upon the sands for you are overdue love to return to me as I kiss my love note to you and toss the bottle once more into the dark blue abyss below my coke bottle promise forever and only yours I do stay honest
Iam Hungry...Thirst is uncontrollable It nearly kills me,Cries a poor one.. A dirty wasteland that is his home but its a heaven for him,His mom sick in the bed,He is handicapped. Worms are eating his skinny body,NOBODY to help him! He is helpless...he want to live But waiting for death,Help him god i pray to you....
Memories tumble through my mind, some, missing for a while. I try to fill in the blanks. Others, I sweep into the corners. You know, the ones that are easier forgotten. Tumbleweeds...my memories have become tumbleweeds. I take snapshots of the cherished ones, giving them a home before they blow away in the savage wind. "Did I tell you my mom liked to dance?" "Yes", I remember. I hear the music, her long hair bouncing with each step. She doesn't dance anymore. Moments gone...memories fleeting. "Did I tell you my dad played drums?" "Yes", I remember. I hear rat-a-tat-tat in my head. I used to sing at the top of my lungs while he played. He never seemed to mind my shrill, little girl voice. I miss him, I miss his drums. Music is not the same. I close my eyes and another memory blows through spaces. My brother is racing his bike down the street FAST. He is about ten, all legs in his shorts. "Where are you going?" I call after him, too late. He is gone and I wonder if he was ever here. Some do go astray I remind myself. Missing memories...missing love. "Wait, come back", I yell. I'm still here. Ruminating, I ask myself if we ever know the ones we love. No, not really. I remember. Frantic, I reach for the tumbleweeds. I reach for my two earthly fathers who are long gone... I see them. Then, they blow away, missing again. I chase them futilely. The savage wind still blows. Across grains of desert sand, I will never know why. Tumbleweeds...my memories have become tumbleweeds. By Rhonda Johnson-Saunders March 2, 2012 Second Place in Chris Aechtner's Let the Masks Fall Contest
Futility my heart breathes its last breath Embraces its own death Ready to be reborn and made anew Can't live a lie Refuse to "do" and I'll DIE.... Focus now on why I'll live And never touch the sky. I have to forget you I have to reject you But I will never love anyone like I loved you..... I heard you whisper and you never knew it I wiped the tears from your eyes But you couldn't feel it You're lost and you'll never find you And neither will I And I'm so sorry-- but I'm NOT. I'll attempt to reset Try to forget But you know, I never will. Be my dirty little secret My very worst-kept secret Sweet, smooth, beautiful poison My infernal and endless attraction towards complete and utter self-destruction I fell in love with the devil And it will take one heck of an angel To save me from the likes of you.... My addiction my confusion my nightmare my dream never to come true Oh, I'll never forget the times we never shared I'll never forget how you were never there Always me, the stars, and tears And I ask you, what kind of life is THAT? I have to face the facts I don't know what happens now but it happens without you. The stains will always be there the scars will never fade But the memory of you---- it HAS to. I could carry the torch forever But it would only consume me I can't cry another tear for you Or I'll dry up completely It doesn't affect you and you never deserved me You'll go on with your life, too All, all alone Because you'll only ever be in love with you.
Using Jared Picketts form Monotetra Dreamt I was a giant last night running through Lego City height. Smashing it to pieces with might. Such a good fight, such a good fight! At some point city became real. And the buildings' pain I could feel. Big giants standing on the hill. Punching to kill, punching to kill! Cleaving off huge chunks of red brick. Asphalt flying but could not stick! Smashing through walls with a swift kick. Wanting this lick, wanting this lick. It was as real or though it seems smashing through the walls of my dreams, trying to break free with loud screams. No justice deems, no justice deems! My prison walls are very real. Wish it would help me to appeal. My soul grows stagnant with no zeal. To God I kneel, to God I kneel! Though we live in different worlds on a Merry-go-round that twirls. See diff'rent views as life unfurls. Tears cold as pearls, tears cold as pearls.... Inspired by Jonathan Taylor and Jared Pickett...
I am doing this for myself. I am done being hurt. I am tired of the heartache. i wish i never met you sometimes, i am tired of you being a jerk, you hated it when i told you how i felt now you don't get to hear or see me anymore. you broke my heart. you have hurt me more than anyone in my life. why do you act like you don't care? you think your gods gift to women. i know you do almost every guy i know thinks that. i have had so many offers that i had to refuse because i'm still not over you. i know i should be but, but maybe we were meant to be if we were you blew it, and you can't say that you weren't happy with me cause i know you were you told me everyday that you loved me even when you broke my heart into tiny little pieces you said "i will always love you". i don't know if you do or not i'm just sayin' how i feel cuz maybe one day you will realize that "hey i'm stupid for lettin that girl go", NO ONE will love you as much as i still do. and until you realize that don't come around me, cuz if you were to show up right now i don't know what i would say because i'm really hurt and anything could come out of my mouth and and i wouldn't care!
Sometimes I think you can hear The raging tide in my chest Sending waves to my throat. Do you see them crest at my wrist? Plunge, recede, and plunge again - Your undertow has sucked me in. Like skipping stones over water, My staccato heart is lost at sea. No metronome can tame it. No borrowed breath can save it.
Smokeless inhales hurt. I cough tar on my shirt. As my black lungs breathe, Shrilling exhales wheeze. Cabrona Falls me Down to My knees. The nicotine cracks My will. My composure Spills. I want This. I must Have this. I sink Into The brink Of madness.
Her delicate silhouette still lingers in my eyes, closer than these arms can embrace; haunting me. I breathe her in within the lull of a zephyr, lilac and roses filling the air; forever staining my memory. Life found her defenseless, silenced by a veil of darkness; faith clutched tight within her hand, as esoteric dreams are shattered beneath the rages of a soulless hand. Frail she emerged, soul hidden, draped in shades of gray. Sweet serenity severed tragically; incarcerated reality. Her taunting whispers bleed my heart, no peace for the buried thoughts inside; for innocence was laid to rest before dying, earthbound, intimately weaving in and out through me. No more saline tears to sate these eyes, just an expressionless specter in human disguise. She wore candy apple red the day she left; bright eyes that smiled.
First thing you should know, is this isn't a poem, it's not a story, it's not a song. These are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache. Watching the smoke curl between his fingertips, he wonders. Is it his body that's on fire or his soul? Physically he feels fine yet he sees the flames, inside the pain is excruciating yet, not a scratch to be seen. Isn't that a thought though, not a scratch to be seen on his soul. Why is it that the scratches and cuts that do the most damage are the ones you can never see? How can that much pain not leave a visible mark? How much pain can the soul take before it turns into the story of humpty dumpty, never to be put back together again? Isn't it funny how you can forget your dying, when you have died inside? First thing you should know, is this isn't a poem, it's not a story, it's not a song. These are just the mad ramblings of a genius with a headache.
"Once very near the end I said, 'If you can -- if it is allowed – come to me when I too am on my death bed." "Allowed!' she said. "Heaven would have a job to hold me; and as for Hell, I'd break it into bits." Oh God, God, why did you take such trouble to force this creature out of its shell if it is now doomed to crawl back -- to be sucked back -- into it? ~ C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed ~ __________________________________ The division should be acute, the before her, the with her, the after her, Yet there is this constant rattling of doors, though they remain locked, in theory. I think of her as gone until I turn a page and read a passage of pompous dialogue and she returns, My Joie de Vivre, entertaining me with that puckish wit, unabashed. She smiles in the dusk with crusading colours that bend dark horizons, changing clouds unexpectedly. What was I before Joy*? Content, pleasant and productive. But was I alive, aware of Life, its blissful rhythms? Irony defined: the heart which awakened stone no longer beats. Finally, I understand. Lessons are sharp things which infect both fresh and aging amputations. What do I do with this knowledge? It is like learning a language that is no longer spoken, a long monologue unbearably forlorn, painful. Faith dismisses hauntings, yet she does so in daily degrees, oh, the sweet ghosts that peer from those notes, my name underscored in margins. Why is there only one glove in the sewing box? Agony hunts me in the garden. Perfume almost, but not quite a match. Some rooms have snares. I dare not open a kitchen drawer. Pain waits there. The specter of my former self, a staunch gent, so sure of Heaven's role, that cold bloke follows me in the shadows, land of man's rage and despair. There is no pretty death, no words can comfort the ravaged left behind, There is no poetry in our departing; I only pray there is Godspeed in mine. *Written Nov 4, 2012 Joy Gresham Davidman, American poet, and C.S. Lewis, English writer and Oxford scholar, were good friends and married solely for the purpose to keep Joy in England (contested). But love came, as it has a habit of doing, when least expected, after Joy was diagnosed with terminal cancer. There love was true and deep, and her death shattered Lewis. His book, A Grief Observed explores his anguish and a Christian's questions which arise during times of suffering. The film, Shawdowlands, is based on the biography, Through the Shadowlands: The Love Story of C. S. Lewis and Joy Davidman. Lewis died 3 years after Joy. The above poem is a conjecture on my part, as no one can truly know what lies in another's heart, alive or otherwise.
When I think of the plight that children face all over the world I just want to cry Hunger starts and ends their everyday As many of us continue to waste away The scraps that we toss could save a child's life I'll tell you the human race is nothing nice We have no problem spending trillions on war As children starve to death outside a millionaires store They put locks on the dumpsters to keep them out To greedy to give what they are throwing out I watched a show just the other day That showed Children just wasting away Right there in their mothers arms As I ate my giant bowl of lucky charms Pirates raiding off the Somalia Coast Because their children's eyes are hollow as a ghost If my Children were starving these words are true Captain Hook wouldn't hold a light to you know who I think in the overhaul scheme of wrong and right Mankind in general has lost all sight Could you imagine kissing your child's last breath? The rich get richer as they starve to death So as you all tuck your kids into bed tonight Kids all over the world will lose their fight They will simply lie down and die To hungry to fight to weak to cry Shelters that feed the Hungry are in every town, when was the last time that you gave something. No person is any greater than the depth of their compassion. To give is to receive for there is no greater blessing in this life. Keep what you need and give the rest and the Lord will make sure you never run out. God Bless, MJ Written for Sami's contest
Memories move like shadows, A slow and mocking waltz Across a backdrop of loss. Breakable as glass, tiny fissures Through my mind. Malleable as sand - eroded by time, Washed away in pieces. Still, the senses torment: Vacant voices, ghostly glimpses, Wafts of faint perfume - Your phantom scent The worst kind of haunting. I fear your image has become plastic - A product of albums Flipped through yet again: A cruel, addictive time loop. And I can't keep my mind From creasing, fading, Curling at the edges Like an old photograph.
'Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust' (No one is going to bust up MY insides, sew my eyes and mouth shut, drain my blood and pump me full of fluid then seal me up in a concrete drawer) Mama I was so young, so very young So very young and so very curious You were sitting in your favorite chair I was sitting on the arm of your chair "Mama what did they do to you in the hospital?" You parted your gown and I saw a flaming scar Something was missing… The lady with the bun on her head came into the classroom with an apple I was called out into the hall The lady with the bun on her head presented me with the apple I said "Thank you for the apple" She said, "You're welcome son" (Teacher had a grave look on her face, shaking her head slightly and muttering) The lady with the bun on her head said "I need you to come with me son" and escorted me outside where our car was waiting; grandma and grandpa in the front, daddy in the back with my two brothers. Daddy said with a wavering voice, "Boys, your mother has gone to be with the Lord" We rode home in silence… They even had a dresser with a mirror with plush carpet, end tables and lamps in the room we were escorted to They had you laid out in a bed with the covers folded neatly down but it was not really you… Someone had made a copy of you A life sized, porcelain doll image of you Grandpa went over and reached down "Look, she has her favorite earrings on Doesn't she look beautiful?" (Mama, I didn't think you looked beautiful at all) I remember asking daddy, "Daddy, how come, how come they gonna put mama in that drawer?" Mama I was so young, so very young I was at the ideal age of six mama Old enough to comprehend but too young to understand Old enough to hurt like hell but too young to know why I guess I miss you even now mama Mama, I guess what I miss the most is just growing up without you and that you never said goodbye… Oh mama... don't let them bust up my insides, sew my eyes and mouth shut, drain my blood and pump me full of fluid, then seal me up in a concrete drawer like they did you… 'Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust' (Cremation if you please)
I remember the day we met It was the best day of my life I can't bring myself to forget you For you are a part of my soul I remember the hour I first loved you I know it—I still do And I will never love you less As the years progress I forget about my sad affairs When I reflect upon that day Though our communication died, I still feel there is a way… I do away with the misery As I look into your eyes Your haunting face in a photo Is a living enmity in my heart You shall never die As long as I wait for a new day And lift you—my future! By the grave I will faithfully stay No! It is not a permanent goodbye We shall thrive together again As one mind and body Till then—lie still and I will pray, "May that new day come today"
The steady pull of temptation-- a tease on my resolution. When I can sleep, I take what dreams afford me. In these dreams, my 'noxide comes to ward me. Her smoke is an invitation. my conscience falls for the con science of my imagination. I give in and reality spins. Between the sleeps, I lie in sanity. I wonder: Did I give into my humanity? did I'd err? Is that smoke in the air?
He looks on with glasses, from a distance, but faces are blurred, and it only magnifies his deep loss Ninette form 3/23/12
Chain smoke until I'm in care of the CO. There's one left, still. I smoke it really slow. "It's the end," I anticipate As the last inch evaporates. I can't get Over it; It's over before I know it. Butt, I can't quit. I'm possessed with this Obsession; I'm addicted. My lungs have oxygen, Yet I'm suffocating inside. I can't breathe again Without my 'noxide.
I see her still in twilights shroud At visions edge she's standing still She lives on for me, but makes no sound Her presence felt , a loving glow. She watches me with sightless eyes The look that speaks but makes no sound Where shadows spill she lingers now But when I look I cannot see, just feel. She should be here if fate were kind My partner in the quite times I miss the things she needed that I gave. That giving soul that has now passed. She waits, I know she does. The bond that held will always be She was my friend, my love, my charge. Now my pain, my loss, my memory's dear.
L iving I n F ear E verywhere Just as we live and just as we die We laugh, kill and crucify We are no more our brothers than we are ourselves We are the players With the tools and talent of the efficient demise Of war, famine and greed We do rise Of the ever constant ricochet of freedom in our ears As we wrap our fallen dead in a shroud of rights, laws and bills And continue to improve the technology, the precision The assurance of absolute destruction Buying death is easy Dealing is easier Survival The career choice of many A thriving business with prestige and power Taking, wanting, hungry for the rush So young, so fragile Blood is running in the streets A seemingly endless fountain of misguided youth Falling, one after the other So far from the truth S hocked A ngry D epressed What good has ever come from a gun ? Why kill ? Why are we arming our children ? Our future ? Are you blind to the fact ? Do you not hear the sound ? Do you not see ? Do you not care ? We are killing ourselves Stealing each others dreams Each others families Why pro-create ? To produce, raise, and nurture more disposable targets ? Is there another use for guns ? 1 + 1 = 0 One bullet + one individual = one less reason to care We are waging war upon our brothers for money, love and survival G ive U s N o S anity All to easy.................... Living In Fear Everywhere Eric (and sometimes not)
your velvety blossoms slowly withers away once tender roots have now decayed at the thought i cringe such insidious disease gradually infects each and every leaf moldy black spots crinkled stained edges your magnificent growth gradually suppresses your unsurpassed beauty now fuzzed up and gray crinkled debilated stems a dull distorted array shoots barely opened leaves now curled and bent such unforgettable moment your petals soon descend your spicy scent has drifted such sickly brittle vein Flowers now discolored and left to thrive on pain after months of nurturing your once marvelous display the thought of you slowly wilting has left me in dismay *My theme is taken from Constance's Poem "in Memory of a rose"*
you turned our shared world upside down without explaining in more or only few words changing closeness into the opposite of nigh hidden in your dyslexic stronghold you missed the shame I overcame ignoring my myriad attempts for another try behind your translucent glass-brick wall you're suddenly earsplitting deaf ceaselessly refusing to explain why a living nightmare slowly muted the opposite of a love song dies down embedded in tears I still cry sorry seems to be the hardest word not for me to say sincere and heartfelt to you but for you to understand by losing also your third eye behind thousands of hugest question marks the presence of your absence displays a killing-field of friendship where people partially die © Elly Wouterse
The rim of my Erembe in hand, her quiet pace remains. Today the Angolan sky spills liquid of my breast, while her breath smothers the blank sounds of the tired plains (Colors of snowbird's crest) woven with the smoke and strain of yesterday. My little Faiza, how were you able to run? She carries the lone gaze of hours dizzily felt four and twenty ago: the shedding, scraping of blood, our village skin melts neath the sun, color of cocoa, scent of smoking gun. Bear not burden or shame upon your desperate frame, my daughter. Her face and a diamond linger I know the worth each brings (Special love and a shiny finger) Such pretty things may bring about a slaughter. Though never the same, Though never together, each possesses a facet of pain. The rim of my Erembe in hand, her quiet pace remains.
I may not be enough for you But I am enough for me Perhaps it was wrong from the start Maybe I knew that Although it wouldn't last I figured I could at least try Whether it was for you or me I have yet to realize There is no one to blame Other than myself of course Do not let your heart shatter Because the pain is not worth it Another will replace me She will be better for you Because if I stayed You would have been trapped Nothing good can come from me I now realize that A waste of time I can be I have wasted much of yours Yet I do not fear for you Because if you love someone Such as I You let them go If they return it was fate If not they will find another As will I So with love and care I bid you farewell Many doors are now open I wish you well
My words are lost in ink stains Verses smudged in prints of you Illegible scribbles soon fill in lines Once paved with love anew Now only paperless pain ensues An unnatural sequence of thoughts Scribed in distressed hues of blue Will re-actively release your grip But the pain it can't undo Now only agony grew My heart hands weep writes of tomorrow My paper and pen are tempered in sorrow My emotions bellow wallows Of a mournful mind I pray This too Shall pass In time…
HELP The CAPTCHA took me by surprise tonight Letters became ghouls in my mind's eye I listed them— Noted them; words...begging, crying out for me STAY CAPTCHA was merely mocked By millions of viewers on keyboards I imagined all— Tears began to fall LOST How may I help you, CAPTCHA? Are you merely what they say? Is there more— Tell me, I pray AAND You bewilder my senses with your emptiness The computer became my way to you But all I could do— Was imitate CRYY I began to imagine someone stuck in CAPTCHA A place where they harbored the weak They took what they pleased— Allowed them to speak NNOW Today it was happening and evermore There was a reason I came to know And now— I want to know more FOLL I swallowed air and typed in the words Feeling worthless and absurd I began to believe— There was more to this irrational dream XOW3 The screen went black and then I was sure I couldn't doubt it anymore The CAPTCHA wanted me— The letters suddenly blurred and unseen CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Let them go CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Full of woe CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Take me now CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Tell me how to CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Set them free CAPTCHA CAPTCHA Knowing is free Knowing is free MMEE For years I have copied your codes Knowing you are there Me—it's me Crying in the dark pit of despair AAND Though empty your words are to me They are all I hear All I fear— In four letters on this electric trap XXBX What am I to do? To follow would weary my soul To save— Would take its toll FREE What is this foreign word my dear? Oh, how can you cut and paste it in my mind so clear? Free—and then? Close your eyes and count to ten The victims of the CAPTCHA remain a mystery to us all Yet still we stare at the codes and merely imitate them We are zombies staring our lives away Trapped in CAPTCHA's claws Sad, deprived. . . CAPTURED I speak your language to stop this cruelty: THEE 2TRUE TH78 IS9X BEF4 HOUR VERY EYES Though we choose not to see We choose not to fight We choose only to IMITATE We merely copy and paste CRYY CRYY CRYY GOOD BAYE BAYE BAYE
Between happiness and sadness —silence; an angel prays: I kiss the loneliness of old people, their temples like handfuls of winter; their hearts are used baggage, waiting; memories speak to them, they smile and tell me stories from their youth —sadness falls; silence passes unspoken —they remember the dead. I kiss the loneliness from their temples and sadness lifts from their mouths. ——————————————————————— From my first book: 'In Forbidden Language' ©dah / Stillpoint Books 2010 all rights reserved Search Amazon Books: "in forbidden language/dah"
The holding of his joyful trembling arms will clasp no more pink feeble fingers for even blood betrayed its passing. The most beautiful cry vanished without a single tune unheard by the looking grandparents. No unfamiliar friends in white giving genuine smiles and congratulations to the dad but the unacceptable shaking of heads and unwanted tap at their backs. Suppressed get-the-hell-out-of-heres. And the mother? Nothing is more hurting than to never touch a thing that she sheltered all her life To holler in pain of delivering would have been divine to scream, wonderful to roar, magnificent to rip bed sheets and curse the father while letting it out into world are mostly gratifying than to remain silent while the cannula forces its entry to the abandoned world of unborn. No stupid peek-a-boos will ever echo in this haunted crib. No tingling of rattles will ever irritate ears in smelly midnights No nursery rhyme will hum. School bus will never blow its horn To call upon the school child. No stars on a hand. No you're-the-best-mom-in-the-worlds. Entrant into Scribe Marlon Linton's UNBORN BABIES DREAM Contest © October 8, 2012
For the torn, for the meek. Toward the storm, toward the beast. For the scorned, for the weak. Wounded warriors, for the free. In the dirt, make my bed. Firefight, overhead. Live on hope, consume hate. Rusted spoon, rusted plate. On this stage, in my role. Home one day, never whole. For this goal, in the name. Different soul, though the same. Take my life, use it well. Build your heaven, on my hell. Don't you cry, I'll always be. Wounded warrior, for the free.
This hurts too much, Even though at times Its the best thing ever. However, the pain I feel right now Is destroying all that I am. I feel worthless and dumb. Vunerable and used. I also feel loved and special. Beautiful and wanted. These feeling are so extreme in every which way possible. I love how I feel when with you I hate how I feel guilty when we part I love looking in your eyes I hate when mine cry Your fingers along my face also touches her Those lips that drive me crazy Are sleeping against her neck tonight I love who I am around you I hate what I have turned into I love the way you make me feel I hate that she must feel that as well No matter how good it feels This pain is too much to bear I love you I truely truely do But the hurt is not worth The random few moments of bliss. Goodbye, my love-hate lover Goodbye **Note** This is a letter/poem I wrote for someone special. But it moves me so much every time i read it, I thought maybe someone else would enjoy reading it as well. 'To write is to share with the world, how we all feel but never speak of' Lisa
On this dreary winter morning I sit on a bench in Central Park. Lost in my own thoughts of the conversation I had with my ex-wife and her last remarks. I keep asking myself is it my fault? What did I do wrong? The chilly wind fills my ears with it's endless song. I shiver slightly and goose bumps crawl along the back of my neck. Her words have left me an emotional wreck. I pull my leather jacket tighter around my shoulders. I feel it in my bones this day will get colder. I've seen several joggers getting in their morning run. That just shows people will continue their lives never mind the rays of the sun. So many thoughts running through my head. And I hold the morning newspaper I still haven't read. I contemplate over my life, it's not always easy, and so-called-friends can be the enemy. Even your spouse living in your house can betray you with infidelity. That is why my heart is aching like a cavity. Right now I'm doing my best to hang on to my sanity, but I really want to shout profanity. I notice an attractive couple hand-n-hand laughing and enjoying a morning stroll; and for some reason I can't control, I feel a sense of peace glow within my soul. My insecurities diminish from their dark hellhole. I begin to feel "whole," and suddenly this morning doesn't seem so cold. I get up from the bench shaking off the numbness that has set in. A very pretty woman walks by with her dog and I grin. She notices and smiles back. Wow! A kinda smile that is only meant for kodak! I watch her walk past me with her dog leading the way. Something tells me "you better not let this one get away." As I'm listening to my inner voice, she glances back over her shoulder, and I knew that she too was giving me a choice. Amazing how just several minutes ago my entire world seemed so dark. I now knew everything was going to be okay because of this bench in Central Park...... * 10th Place win in "Anything Goes" Contest sponsored by A Rambling Poet
The calmness settles in now with acceptable disquietness as we return to living life with one less earthly vessel dwelling lovingly among us. Silence reigning for moments as our minds and spirits search for solace in numbing grief while shadows from the past run a perpetual playback of memories, now bittersweet. In the stillness of this new day may we find peaceful comfort as our feet search for stable ground and our hearts struggle with our own personal storms Remembering God's grace and Dad's stepping stone of Faith 3/31/2012 I wrote this for my family this morning after we layed my father-in-law to rest yesterday. Such a faithful man in Christ. His earthly presence will be missed, but his memories will forever be with us.
Cancer, you are an artist A prolific one at that, For several dear ones Have encountered your work. Your wretched fingers as sculptors Design imprints of faces unknown. You smudge white, pain-ridden clay A little here, a little there, Till your subject becomes amorphous. But oh you are not finished! A red cross encrusted kiln Invariably cements your doings. A surgery of crackling and burning, Until the shape is spit out, A hard shell lost of all dignity. Satisfied with your creation, You give it one last look Before it rests on an earthly shelf And another project is begun. I am sad to say, You are quite skilled at your craft.
Mom, I tried to call you last night. I nearly had a heart attack, as I frantically searched every book in our house for a number with your name, And it wasn't until the sun slept and the moon awakened that I realized, Heavens number isn't in the yellow pages, And your old cell number is disconnected too, And no matter how many times I call the operator , She wont connect me to "My mommy." So I sat there.. Staring at the four walls that have transformed from my sanctuary to my hell Listening to the old church songs that no longer lift my spirit Because how can songs lift a spirit that is in pieces? Mom, Your scent is no longer in your clothes And those pictures of you and I smiling as if there is no more happiness in the world to attain Have faded And every object that you once touched so freely, Has been packed into boxes with no name, The sound from the tape sealing them shut made me cry, The movers came and no matter how much I pleaded and begged, They still would not resist in taking all I had left of you away So mom, I grabbed my jacket. Running fast as I could and ignoring the pain that my deep breaths caused. Ignoring the stares of school aged children sitting with their mothers and fathers, I ran faster than I ever have. Because mom , They are taking all that's left of you in small brown boxes to the ends of the earth And so to the ends of the earth I will travel to be with you, Mom.
Only silence dresses her rigging now To the call of the bosun's whistle Her hatches now stand locked and secure Where long past sailors once lingered She is the last of the old frigates Moored in the shallows of Charlestown Board her and hear her echoes of valor Haughtily anchored her colors humbly fly No blemishes on her hull show her battles Her carronades still sit silently waiting As she floats mythically at ease For a moment I can hear the great moans Her keel and sailors cresting Atlantic waves To Captain Hulls orders to come about And charge on the enemy ship Guerriere On her decks I feel the plight of her dead Hearing stories of centuries old bulkheads Astounding feats of a morose pride To have brought their foe to capitulate Now she stands tacit though ever grand And still on her decks and deep in the bowels The mighty spirit of U.S.S. Constitution dwells A monument of endurance softly whispering "Lest we remember long forgotten sacrifices…"
One step I go back, and I see you holding my hands... With a smile, walking down the lanes. Yesterday I acquainted me in you When your hands grabbed mine in your fears With such reliance, allaying down the pains. And Today when I stood still I saw myself lost in despair When my hands sorely waved you goodbye. Another step I go back, and I see you resting on my shoulder With an ease, breathing out all your whimseys. Yesterday I held myself in you When you hugged me in your tenderness With such peace, grieving away all the hearsays. And Today when I fastened myself I felt I betrayed your trust When my arms direly opened to free your life. Further I stepped to go back, and I see you lying up on me abreast With an intimacy, desiring all your fondness. Yesterday I mellowed my soul in yours' When you lusted me in your reverences With such warmth, melting down all the iciness. And Today when I lie down I realized I burnt my essence When my deity hollered out to coffined my soul. Yet I wanted to go back, and I see my shadow fading out slowly under the daylight With such isolation, deafing all those mirthful moments. Yesterday I was in a state of solitude Till I acquainted with your heart and soul With such reliance, peace and warmth, gratifying all forbearance. And Today I am back, where I was I raged as it was hard to believe When my heart panicked to say you GOOD-BYE.
Death, thou boisterous ancient foe, you crept in surreptitiously, and bore a hole in our hearts. It's 14 years now, 14 years of longing. For seven years, the torrential rain battered us, and we almost succumbed to the intensity of the rain. Then, a Moses arose, lion-hearted damsel and the lineage was rescued. Father, I ache and bleed daily, as I remember your tilling and planting seasons. You planted many seeds in us. Father, a little seed has sprouted, and has borne many fruits, succulent fruits indeed. I wished I could give you a bite, Alas, the curtain was drawn 14 years ago, and now you are a complete dust. Adieu, my father! Adieu, the muse that brought out the poet in me. The pain, grief and sorrow that I felt after my father's death forced me to look for a way of expressing the pent up emotion of anger and sadness; poetry gave me the answer. Over the years, I have fallen in love with poetry and no one can break the union
She was Rachel, beautiful as her name and in all ways. In innocence, caught up in "grown up, worldly things Folks who knew her laughed it off took is as if a joke At a loss to grasp the deeper meaning behind it all Her parents were alarmed and sought to reinforce their rules But it seemed it was too late to remedy this state It's so hard to understand how this change came about One moment she was their baby, the next, a stranger in their midst This tragedy could not have been any part of God's plan Lost, running away, leaving behind comfort and warmth She, instead would hitch-hike her way to live as a stray Rachel and her friends never envisioned the many dangers For lack of better judgment, with her life she would pay He seemed like an average "Joe", wearing a jacket of softest leather She thought, 'He's hot and dressed fine; no way could he be whack' Inexperience and temperament silently urged her on Repressed anger held fast as she played a game of dice She'd been waiting at the gas station just off Route Seventy Seven Many hours past, as she mulled over random thoughts Cold, tired and hungry, it was getting late as panic took a seat Contn'd Pg. 2
I know where you are, I simply can't find you ..... alone and together we silently sway . You sit in the lamplight in front of the embers, yesterday's answers asleep on the floor. I sweep up the fragments of years in the evening, laying them gently on top of the coals. one bright flaring moment alive in your pipils, a memory burning like dry leaves in Autumn, a smile on your face that you wore when you found me lost and alone as I am here today.
Rest is a requirement, for all, in order to have this, sleep is a must, after a day's of hard work, wherein sleep is a must, for all, to freshen up the next day, though the mind goes to sleep, and the body follows suit, the subconscious mind awakens, and in lie, a number of dreams, awaiting you, the dream, that always reigns in my mind, is the death of my wife, not once, but more than a couple of times, why does this dream, often arise in my mind, is the answer I seek, is it because of the love we have towards one another, or is it the compassion for each other, or is it in relation of serving one another, or is it a kind of warning, a warning to take care in the future, some people may call this as the sixth sense, while I call this a nightmare, as nightmares are really scary, yes, nightmares are quite scary indeed, if you do agree with me or not!! From:-Mr.Manu Nair (dated 19th November, 2012)
The man with the plastic bug in his head monopolized my dreams last night in the place that the horsefly of my dignity finally surrender to the impresario without a fight. Seven days and 7 hours transplanted in my memorabilia reminding the rustiness of the purple child flatterers danced beneath the clouds of melancholy and morality spreader the master plan inside my mind. The disinheritance of my immortality the final day discouraged my desire to see the forbidden love restored my will to escape manipulated the deep of the uncertainty above. Released from the plastic bug in my head try to cover my yellow child in the purple sky laughing,singing,whispering,playing seven days and seven hours before he dies.
Contn'd from Pg 1 So she called out to the stranger and asked for a ride Snow had fallen heavily and already piled three feet high When she climbed into the four-wheel truck never giving it another thought Before he headed down the highway, he went into a crowded bar Intuition nudged her, 'get out now, turn back!' But pride urged her, 'stay' He returned with a brown bag; appearing harmless as he turned to her 'Say, you're trembling!' He said and flashed a breathless smile 'Here, have a slug, of this, it'll warm you up, pretty girl!' Hesitation loomed for a minute then she accepted the bag from his hand Young Rachel, was now treading a path beyond thin, cracking ice As tears stung her beautiful eyes, she'd never had a drink this strong How her vacant tummy rebelled against the searing burn Nausea arose from deep within, and she began to have regrets Registering strong protest, her regurgitation would later accuse her killer Her faith was sealed as there were no open doors left for escape And before she realized he had made a reckless wide left turn Down the snow covered dirt path through tall pines and fir No longer were there sightings of sparsely lit farm houses Interspersed along the desolate, picturesque landscape The four-wheeler tackled with ease, snow drifts of fresh fallen snow Where the following spring young Rachel's body would be discovered That night Rachel laid buried under a few feet of snow She was at rest now to awaken to eternity in sunny fields Beautiful as daisies growing in heaven, carefree and endlessly in bloom! ~*~ For: Rachel..R.I.P.
Do you like destroying our family? Do you enjoy tearing us to shreds? Or are you too prideful to care Too ignorant to change your ways I know full well that you don't regret it I know that you don't mind hurting us Satan has a tight grip on your heart And you don't even think twice about it How I want to speak out to you But alas I am too young Believe me, you wouldn't listen to me But I'm wise enough to know what is wrong
The truth It will destroy you An August day While you sweep up rose petals On our Sun drenched porch You look at me from under heavy lashes And say it's ok You don't wish to be without me It's ok your always want me Your never stop I'll bask in this glory Thanking God for you loving me As tears prick the back of my eyes The hand around my heart squeezes a little tighter Until I am breathless with it In time There is a difference to us Making love is no longer rushed After I look at you, looking down at me But neither of us say it's pointless Your days a little darker A little longer Things a little more useless The hand around my heart squeezes a little tighter As the truth picks away at your dreams one by one At Christmas we pretend we are still happy Completely in love While in the garden with your sister The truth pours out of me in great sobs She says it's ok your get through this We both know she's lying Inside she's crying I had no right in making you love me So the hand squeezes a little tighter round my heart Somewhere along the way Anger rises The tension surprises us You begin to resent me Hate me for letting you love me And I am sorry I stayed a little too long Cared a little too much I needed this whatever it was So the hand squeezes a little tighter round my heart Invisibly I collect my possessions Storing them They lay in wait Courage appears At three in the morning on a Tuesday Quietly I get my things Wait by the window for a taxi As the hand squeezes a little tighter round my heart The knowledge erupted Watching you hold your new Godson Looking at me longingly Knowing I can never give you this Tears glazing your eyes Looking so proud It's wrong for me to keep you With me this is all your ever be A childless man In your hallway You help with my bags saying nothing I will never be wife, bnever be a mother Without you I'll never be anything As the cab pulls away You say your always love me I say I know But I have to let you go I'm giving you a chance of what I can't give you The most precious thing A family So the hand completely squeezes my heart
Thoughts of a world without you Make me cringe. I felt you were invincible. You were the constant, The strength when I could carry the pain no more. Always the courage when I was afraid. My sole source for true love, Love independent of my success or failure. Never could I imagine this day would come. Now, death grips your hand tighter than life. I try to be strong. I hope I am brave. I pray every day I find your traits in me. The hours seem to fly. Tomorrow floats so far ahead. Nothing is certain, Each breath could be the last. I weep, sad for the impending loss. Yet joyous in the knowledge Soon you will suffer no more.
It amazes me how much man has evolved Yet, How little he has learned All around the globe Millions die of disease and starvation While the ever so intelligent creature known as man Spends millions upon millions of dollars every single day Killing each other Instead of finding cures for the ill or feeding starving children Oh sure, we dabble in those efforts But we are committed to killing each other Governments all around the globe Spend most of their money On their armies Either to defend or attack Their enemies Supposedly, the most intelligent creature on earth The intellectual creature known as man If I may go so far Mans commitment to war and killing Goes far beyond any one mans term in office It goes far beyond any one mans lifetime It goes far beyond any century or any one era From beginning to end, top to bottom East to west, north to south Red, yellow, brown, black or white Our commitment to killing each other Is undeniable How can a species that is smart enough to split atoms Creating weapons that will kill millions Still be stupid enough to do it? And now I see on the science channel That man has now devised the Platonic beam A beam of light that just disintegrates the target in an instant At what price you ask? Well I don't know but I reckon if we diverted that money To say solar energy projects They could probably put a solar energy system On every home in the world for free Thus solving the energy crisis Not to mention food in the icebox and medicine in the cabinet Because of course when you create such an amazing new weapon You need an entire new type of ship to deploy it from Thus is born the next generation of war birds They jettison into space Then go into super afterburner (A jet engine minus oxygen) Which they said would reach like 20,000 miles an hour So you could shoot halfway around the world Disintegrate your enemy And be home in time for supper I believe when speaking of politics It's not a National Crisis It's a Global Epidemic
Reaching hands fingertips touching Clasping. Finally. Pull me down to golden depths of you where quiet awaits in breathless peaceful. Wrap your broken mind around my grateful soul and hear the healing songs of God's spirit .... hummingbird wings as they kiss your cheek spring breezes through autumn pines incoming tide in twilight sleep winter's first snowfall ~ open your eyes remember mine and take my hand ...
When I'm all alone I try to kill the thought of you Assuring myself You're just a ghost passing through And now that you're here with me I feel the need to soar and fly Only thing is: I'd much rather crawl away and die I don't want to be happy I don't want to fool myself I don't want to feel the pressure Of putting on a heaven in hell I don't want to be your angel I don't want to face the growth I don't want to be happy I don't want the aching truth You never saw me in your stride As I smiled wide in my heavenly hide Believing in myself without a chance Not able to grasp this ghostly romance You smoked me like a cigarette Burning out my love, leaving butts of regret And all the time I laugh and smile As you see right through me all the while I don't want to be happy I don't want to live a lie I don't want to feel your leisure As I crumple down to die I don't want to disappoint you I don't want to show and tell I just want to see you happy Just leave me in the dark to dwell
they said when they found her she was frozen my god-mother who was a police officer told me they had to peel the ice laden sheets from my mothers face i knocked on the the door the night before when it swung open behind the iron guard gate i stared at champagne such an odd name for a pit bull having hated me for years he lunged at the gate why didn't i just leave? why? i ran to the back of the house and broke the window why was i panicking? broke the window to draw him to the back ran back to the front door and tried... mamma i tried.... to open the gate champagne such an odd name hit the gate howling and growling i wish i would have paid attention to how he looked at me i left defeated and asked the neighbor if he had seen my mom "not today" i found out the next day that my mom was frozen stiff on that bed all alone while i knocked outside
Not all is lost. In rotting wood, where salamanders hibernate, creatures plunder fallen treasures. Under the garden chair, a pair of summer shoes lie - abandoned? Not all roses die when summer goes. Somewhere a rose is blooming still, waiting to be found.
A soul weeps in flesh for the pain I left behind. I am sorry for the pain,the tears, I left for you to bear. These healing words I send with a bumble bee to heal a bleeding rose. These napkin like words I pray can wipe your tears and snotty nose. I was young and naive,I cherished my pride instead of your heart . There the coldest winter did start. If it makes you happy I disposed of the mistress. Who faded in long lost memory of shadowed kisses. No,no,no I am sorry for writing that, its a poets bold habit of honesty, but in writing this I thought i should be honest and honest I shall be.I apologize for leaving your emotions suppressed,unknown and ostracized. Yes, I know the ocean swollen with your tears,the angels descended on a bloody battle field to hear your cry.I hope you can summons them again and reconsider the report to the almighty farther. If I could write this apology in the eye of the sky I would,for my remorse to be seen , a once foolish human being .Your heart I didn't mean to decay. I apologize for the lies, cries,for making you eat sadly all those ice creams and soggy apple pies,from absorbing tears fallen from yours eyes. Left to wonder in the vastness of the universe alone. I am sorry also sorry for the smudged ink and some of the lines. I cried along with them, imaging your painful times. Yours truly Elliott Bowe To:Simone Descartes
"Friend, Mind wandering through misty woods. You don't understand your purpose. Friend, I knew you too little, Please do not shed your salty emotions, Not out of anger, not out of sadness. Friend, You now lose your way so easily, You sink, you burst, you burn inwardly. You weep from frustrations, From the guilt of an honest smile, From pains, that you forget for a moment, That come swiftly back to haunt you of your loss. I understand, dear friend. You once had a light and the woods seek to snuff it out. Do not fear, dear friend, Friend follow me, as I once did you. Friend, now you see? Yes, you see, The little wisps in the fog that guide us home." ~In memory of Bill Hamman, and all else who have suffered the pains of Alzheimer's
What would I say to you my love if I should chance to meet you yet again in the summer rain whilst I were walking in a field of flowers of the sun, I'd try to find the words to tell you how I've missed you, how I have longed for you down all these years in silence. But you would know my heart and how I've yearned and sorrowed for your sweet face, for your tender touch, and how I've missed your eyes those pools of silver light, and for the bond I thought I'd lost forever. Then you would speak to me in flowers, in the green blades of meadow grass, in the flight of swallows swooping on the soft still air, and in the wind singing in the tall proud trees, and you would show me how our love is not forever gone but lives and breathes its beauty within the beating of my heart. You would leave me then and I would stand here in the summer rain amongst the flowers of the sun, and if we should ever chance to meet again my love what would I say.
As the sun caresses the world In her warm embrace to wake us, I held you. Like a toddler boldly stepping forth Into the wondrous adventure awaiting, I taught you. Admirer, collector, connoisseur of the fine, I found so much to admire in you, I appreciated you. Eyes twinkling starlight, impish grin, I learned much and you taught me to play, I grew with you. The glow of life, a bundle of joy, You gave me my dream of having a family, I was you. Romeo was just a passing fling, My love was King … none surpassed my strength, I loved you. Days now are just empty minutes, My new quest to find peace and move on, I forgive you. Cheeks wet, heart heavy, spirit strong, Mind firmly stuck on dusty, old Memory Lane, I miss you.
Lurching yet graceful ,the old black cat sets off. Slowly he circles the edges of the garden in joy. In the car ,though still in a shut basket, He always knew when we came to the turning of the road. Was it the cherry trees in blossom,a scent Or something we could never be aware of? I would open his basket in the car. He comes out and descends so carefully Onto the pavement,then tries to bound up the path, The long wooded back garden is his total joy. He would sit watching tiny frogs in a deep pond in the sun. No doubt he longed to catch one. He once brought a robin indoors, The bird was completely unharmed. Must have been his gift to me We released it later after its shock had worn off. Now he can only hobble, And soon, his thinness warns me, he'll be gone. No cat has ever loved or will love like this cat, A rescued, terrified animal. His eyes say everything to me. I look into their clear-jewelled greenness I look into a deep,still glowing sea of light. The last day,finally, all day,he's on my knee. I say"goodbye,goodbye,Pussy". And he's gone,just before tea. Now the garden seems empty. Love leaves a gap. Love leaves us bare Love leaves us stripped. Yet Love is eternal grace. A mystery of faith. I believe. Believe. Be.
How can you look someone in the eyes and tell them it's the end? How can you possibly do that without shedding tears? Or even blinking? Do you not feel it? That pain, that pain that's taking over Their soul, as you tell them their life is ending? Or maybe it's just that you have lost your own soul? In that instant when you found out that the greatest part of yourself Is about to disappear, That its light was about to be permanently extinguished. Can't you feel it? That sorrow that slowly shutters their hearts? Or the fear that's taking over their minds? it's a furious fire, Cutting off any glimpse of hope with its smog, That fear, its suffocating their soul into its last gasp. Can't you see it? How that laughter ends sharply, in pain? How it breaks in half every time, never to relapse into its fullness? How the darkness stealthily takes over those, once life-filled, eyes? That following calm, It's the call of darkness, Smoothly enchanting their soul into submissiveness. Until all is in deadly silence, Their bodies still, their souls forever gone into unknown. Do your tears come then? Do you feel their pain then? Do you see it? Or do you stay the same? Unchanged, unemotional, shell shocked, And forever unbelieving still?
I dedicate this poem to you, The one who I used to call "friend", "Best friend", or maybe even "sister". Yes, you meant that much to me, And I thought I meant as much to you. No, maybe not as much, but at least a "best friend". Did I ask for too much? Was that too selfish of a request? I thought that we'd be best friends forever, I really did. But I guess it was all just a fantasy, A fragment of my imagination. After all, reality is a much harsher place. I think I only realized that after you walked away; After you walked away and never looked back And left me in a deep, dark pit of torment, Wondering why you'd changed. If I'd done something different, would you still be the same? Of all the people beside me, I never would have guessed that You would be the one to leave me like this. And as I watched from a mile away, How well off you seemeed without me, I fell into a sea of depression. For the longest time, I felt so lonely, Questioning myself whether anyone truly needed me. Or was I only just second choice? Now, as I am writing this poem, I cannot say that I have been completely healed. I still feel the doubt, the uncertainty, When someone says "I love you" Or "You are my best friend" Even when I know that it is all in my head. But I think I can say with confidence that I have become stronger, Even if just a little bit, Even though sometimes I still miss you.
Have I lost it? The writing thing? Have I been absent for so long that my thoughts are unable to come to a complete stop and decide to focus...on ...one...thing? I shudder profusely and then shake.... shudder...shake...doesn't that mean the same thing? God....this feeling of complete talentlessness is absolutely....bad? (SIGH!!!!!) For the sake of being poetic I come up with...bad...seriously!!! My fingers move at a snail's pace to keep up with the dismay that wants spill its inerts on this screen in front of me and it will take the hand of God to prevent me from actually not deciding to hit the delete button and feel justified in my pitifulness!!! (SIGH!!!) Ok...I'll leave it alone be the cheerleader of this...piece...yea.
I burn in a fiery blaze of disappointment for a poor judge to see . Swallowed by hungry tears. Shallow tears eat my cheek. The salty substance, similar to the oceans of life. Washed away and swept off my feet. I am a tiny speckle left of a winning dream. Destroyed by a poets losing dream . A poet destroyer. The ocean of life washing away my short winded words, along with my poorly judged tears in this oceans lair. Knoked by a rock, out of my rhyming socks.A poet destroyed.
The likelihood between myself and a beast, Surpasses my self-grotesque-depiction, at least. I loath the day I entered this death spiral twirl; In this vicious tornado-self-esteem-crawl. Only one sweetest venom sip it takes, To make me be a slave to the demonic taste. Enslaved are my legs from knee below, Enslaved are the thoughts that come too slow. My body gets so numb that nothing scares my skin, Capital sins do not feel so full of sin; I crave to do what is forbidden still, To speak the cruelest things I have an itching will. The street light comes to me in rainbow colored streams, I love the way my mind feels reality like dreams. I am both wide awake and sound asleep; I laugh at nothing and I truly weep; With passion, my blood makes love to wine, My neurons are crushed grapes on the body's vine.
A dedication to my grandpa, i love you and miss you, Your legacy lives on within my heart The sun can shine So bright, it makes you blind Fooling, deceiving. Very misleading . The world telling you it's a good day With just a simple ray. Penetrating your mind Telling you to leave all that behind. So you leave it … Searching for anything to find. To fill that hole in your heart ...with something kind. So you go for a stroll in a park And see a dog with a playful bark. As you step near You start to grow in fear Foam in its mouth You notice your head dropping south Chin down And start to frown. You realize it's not so sunny anymore Rain pours No more birds soar. Drop to your knees And freeze Start to cry. Then wonder why. Why do I feel this way? Looking for answers, you go to the bay. Watching the storm come in, you hear someone say, "Remember what I taught you, You have to be strong. Find the right In the wrong. Everything will be okay. Some days will rain. Some days will shine," Looking around to see who it may be You continue to listen to the voice from the sea, "some days you need to stop everything And pray. The Good Lord will take it away. I've always been your strength Strong for you and yours sister both." As you realize who it is You start to cry, from sadness… And bliss. "I know you miss me… And I miss you too. No need to cry, Oh Catelyn, oh me oh my. But just always know I'm here, In heaven watching over you. If you ever need me. You know where I'll be. Watching over you from the clouds. No need to worry. Don't stress so much. Life happens. It peaks And it stinks.. Given , I wish I was down there to talk to you. But it's all in God's plan. Everything will be for the better. Now I'm sorry I have to go, Check on your sister and cousins you know Whenever your feeling rough Whenever life gets tough Remember what I taught you. Rain may continue Life will happen in different Venues But go dance in the rain Let go of the pain. Enjoy the life God granted you …it won't last forever. Don't plan out the future God has his plan Live his will out Not yours Remember your still a kid, So smile and I love you Catie did" Tears rushing down your face Tears of joy or sorrow You don't really know. Remembering what your grandfather taught you, With his strength You stand up Something in your chest starts to bump Your heart, it's whole Alive Beating once again. Pain is gone And you live on. Dancing in the rain With only life to gain.
Con't from Pt 1 At two years old your motherly instincts took me away./ What could my "mother" say,/ she was married to a man who had a violent hand./ I was too young to understand./ But being with Grandmomma was God's plan./ There was never a time I was too old for you to hold./ You protected me from abusive hands./ You would take beatings in my place from your old man./ Vile names would sting my young ears./ Your arms would comfort me and you would wipe away my tears./ I remember as a child, Thursdays,/ being the best days./ A movie, then a toy,/ and ice cream could be no greater joy./ I was Grandma;'s boy/ You kept my belly full with home cooked meals./ You were the one who watched me ride my first bike without traiining wheels./ You use to tuck me into bed./ Read me a story and kiss my head./ The times I was sick with fever,/ you watched over me without catching a breather./ For twenty-nine years your love was unconditional and without end./ You were not only my Grandmomma but my Mother, Father, my friend./ I pray my words spiritually reach to you beyond those pearly gates./ Because like in life, and in death, God had made us eternally Soulmates!/ I love you momma..... Billie Jean Alexander Lopez May 1, 1937-July 26, 2007 Note: I just finally finished this piece for my momma, It took 2 years! The form of poetry is "spoken work" Thought I would share this piece with you guys. It's a deep personal piece and I hope it "reads well" Jimmy
A lonesome boat in the harbor rocks insanity. Big waves of the black sea roll across the white sands that fade into darkness for eternity. Far from the life giving drops of rain are predators in the city of shadows. Feelings from the last solem breezes blow. As the evening sun fades slowly into the night, the pavement glistens like cracked glass from the earlier evening rain. A lack of silence remains. In the city of shadows, screaming voices creep in the corner of your mind. Visions of the garden where the flowers died. The dark alley reveals the emptiness of peace within your soul, and death reveals the cold, cold truth way beneath the black crumbled earth. Slapped with a strike of lightning, disrupting the fall of silence where secrets crawl to hide, in the foxholes of one's mind. In the city of shadows, bewildered minds tick with the time of the clock. Breath by breath falls perfectly out of place, and darkness opens a new gate. Tunes of the violin slowly fade away. A new awakening to blindness, in the city of shadows.
A continuation of The World Above Me, a special collaberation between myself and my good friend Justin Connor 8/17/12 ------------------------------------------------------------------ The shelter opens its door to the world above me Never have I seen so much destruction My eyes get used to the brightness, An unwanted tear trickling down my cheek But once they are accustomed to the light, I want to close them again I feel the urge to turn back But they push me forward, Whispering low, consoling words I look around to see what humanity used to be Before the devastation And I marvel at what the old world used to be But one question remains: Why did people destroy their lives, And end the world we used to know? I walk my feet on the unknown terrain Ruins. . .debris. . .the air placid and still All around is rubbish My mother whispers a prayer from behind And then I wonder. . . If God was ever here As I look around I notice a book Lying there, upon the ashy wreckage I pick it up and read. . . It details a nation's fight for freedom A large statue of a man is in the building I stand by I stare at the brazen figure in awe The features are crumbling but here it still stands Watching over its obliterated land I squeeze the book in my hand His eyes show loyalty and courage No sadness—not even a speck of fear Looking more outwards I see a tall structure And past that a building with a large dome The architecture of the old world amazes me What wonders men have done—could have done If they hadn't let each other come undone In violence and death Yet still I wonder how these incredible buildings Could possibly remain after all that has happened Like the buildings, we have survived And hopefully, through lessons learned, We can thrive My father tells everyone to clear away the ruins People even use old machines with cranes The old world is gone But from the ashes we can start anew We were in the shelter for the good of humanity And now, because of us, There is hope
I am losing you again White, oh your skin, whiter than pearls… I sit here, trying not to stare, Serene you are, as you lie in your bed, How awful could agony become? I am losing you again Chapped and faded your divinely drawn lips… Opaque, the spark in your eyes, it no longer exists, Uttering out the words, "you had my heart from the start," Lament, your words are, as your lips part, Does God really need another angel by His side? Exasperating, your paralysis, suffocates me… Abashed I awake, from a nightmare, Throbbing, I almost submerged your sheets with gasoline, Yelping, Oh poor baby, you are so soggy from the chemo, Undying, everlasting we are, hang on my love, Rusting your skin, your sickness is so ruthless, to kill you, Could I really break the wall my pride has built? Angst haunted me as I listened to the mournful, Notes of the saddest symphony existing… Could I please place a red rose on your mahogany sepulcher? Endless our love is, as a paroxysm of pain, Rushed through my blood, Amid the purple phlox, and the emerald elms, Waves of distress, overwhelm, As I realise how your anguish was so true, Yesterday, I wished I had died instead of you…
The child aged only ten dressed in tatters for clothes roams the city streets begging for a crust or two His bed is wherever he can find a place to lay his weary head newspapers are his blankets a doorway becomes his home People hurry by uncaring not touched by this little waif never pausing to think of what has brought him so low Orphaned when he was only eight none to take him into their homes he had to learn street creed fast soon understood he was on his own Raped by the age of only nine he has learnt not to trust expecting nothing from life apart from abuse and blows Just one more forgotten waif yet in his heart a spark remains as he remembers times gone by will he make it through to eleven?
i come from the jungle of despair with its vines and thorns full of emptiness i come from the nothingness of space without stars born of a black hole a vacuum of longing i come from a man and a woman but not a mother and a father not husband and wife nor even lovers i come from potential unrealized and opportunity missed slashing away in the rain forest of frustration clearing the way for the seed of hope i come from the society that killed malcolm x and left me for dead that promoted slavery longer than liberty i come from here wishing i was there
She's bitter, numb and cold. Doesn't care who she leaves behind. She doesn't attach to anyone or anything. It'll just hurt her when they're gone. Tomorrow she'll leave and never look back. Regrets she doesn't have any. She feels no remorse for what's she's done. In her eyes she's done nothing wrong. No goodbyes for voyage a head. She will stay for no one. Like a lone ship with no ties. Wonders without reason but to leave. She hates the life she's been given So many people love her she doesn't care. Machine programmed to feel nothing. Feelings make you weak; She doesn't allow weakness She's cruel and cold to keep you away. Because if she doesn't care there will be no strings.
You speak of love, and I say nay Betrayal is more like it I trusted you, but you took advantage plundering it to oblivion Your tokens of love are laughable, all merely fool's gold they satiated me before now they disgust me We speak of different kinds of love Yours is physical, mine is emotional and I refuse to give in anymore so throw away your bargaining chips This love is not for sale. **May 25, 2010 written for John's The Gauntlet contest :)
Standing under an unjust moon unable to move from this lurking mood of alone no shadow cast by this vaporous form reflecting nothing nothing but empty heart drained and dust dry
It's under my bed where the darkness lies... Scattered dreams of wounded butterflies... I half awaken to my daunting dawn; to find my sanity is all but gone... I stumble through my dream-like day; trying to forget that you have gone away... I struggle with my fear of God, as the reaper gently turns and nods... So now it's time for me to go... To sleep on that hill where the tall oaks grow... Despair slowly exits along with the pain... And I fade into the day like the whispering rain.
Scene 1: There once was a man filled with joy a wife, a home and a cute infant boy Everything was grand with twins on the way. A spontaneous dog who liked to play. One day in the spring He'd receive a call. It was about his family. the phone would suddenly fall. Scene 2: The car came out of nowhere smashing head on the passenger side Killing the infant son immediately, in the ambulance his wife would ride. Para-medics rushed frantically to relieve the blood draining from her head. With the severity of the wounds death was inevitable, They said!! At one thirty-four this spring afternoon, Four citizens were pronounced dead. Someones wife, someones children That is what the obituary read. Scene 3: A month later in the basement of his quaint little country home. He sat for hours thinking. Sulking, alone. The thoughts of re-uniting with the family he once had. Drunk now thinking suicide, he knew it would be bad. Palms sweaty, vision blurred. Vexed, praying for what comes next. Reaching for the instrument, his mind perplexed. Scene 4: He lifts the Smith & Wesson revolver from its resting place. Thinking of nothing but his family placing it in the middle of his face. Pulls the trigger, at that moment all went black!! Scene 5: He wakes up SUDDENLY... His puppy licking his eye. He looks at his dog, then begins to cry. When pulling the trigger of this canon of a gun. Instead of death he passed out. As for bullets, there were none.. Jared Pickett 10/17/09 Asavvy1
Silence: All I hear when I call out your name. Snow envelops me and snuffs out my flame. Gone is the light with which your name can be read, I think I hear you, but it's all in my head. I'm deep in the woods where no songs can be heard. I am the only one here, and I speak but four words.
Drop shots and trick shots, we admire The gang banging swear slinging Outcast that got in.. Someone who can shoot bullets faster than words Who's idea of having a good time stops at 3 blunts 2 girls And 1 hell of a night Who needs confrontation when you have the ability to solve any problem With the contraction of a single finger POW, FLASH, and SKID-MARKS Silence floods the avenue As the man we knew Falls pale face to concrete, right behind you Who's gonna go next? What statistic are you willing to live in? When you realize your potential? Where will you go? So many lives to live Why this one? Break the circle of violence and lay a timeline to a better future Rise out of circumstances and give your self a better angle Put down the guns and raise your pens Put down the gang signs and rep peace Show love to all the unloved And maybe they'll be hope for you yet.
I'm a virgin. Yet I'm a peer educator I teach people about sex and how to put on the condom. sometimes the irony does bother me There's an endless supply of condoms in my custody daily yet I have no need for them You should see the eager faces of the kids grabbing them out of boxes like their gods best made gift I can't share in their glory all I can do is watch I hate watching I'm mostly a doer not a witness So in this case I just feel out of place out of context Lost? Not exactly Cause i'm not exactly a saint I probably know more than the one's who are active which makes the irony even more ridiculous. But I guess it's just that need to be in with the crowd The need to feel like I belong Less and less virgin's hang around these parts I'm starting to feel like i'm the only one left like i'm waiting for nothing. The condom box is calling out to me The multiple flavors tempt me to taste. Yet i'm still me. Therefore i'm lame. Therefore i'm waiting... For what i'm not even sure anymore. I though it was because I was looking for the right guy Maybe i'm just inept in this area. LoL that's a laugh. My body knows I'd be a champ. But it also listens to my head. Maybe that's what's the problem. Who knows? All I know is that i'm drowning in a box of condoms.
If time heals all, what heals time? For it cannot be changed, its burned into history, burned into the fabric of time like a scratch on a track. Time can make us feel regret that we did not use it the best we could or it can make us rejoice remembering that good moment in time. It is a fickle thing that most will not appreciate until it's gone. I myself have had more pain than good, but does that count as bad time as it made my character and is the reason I have this strength and insight on life. So I don't believe in or good or bad moments in time, its all on how we look at it and use it going forward. The most important thing to remember and learn from the past is that we ALL make mistakes . . but only a fool repeats them. Yours Fraternally TIME
Standing on this sun-soaked beach without you, sea splashes mix with salty tears that the gentle wind brushes from my cheek. My toes curl into the soft white sand as they did whenever you caressed me. Is it a mistake to return so soon, whence the last strands of happiness lie? I blight this place which you once graced, laying lithe and golden on its shore, out dazzling the sun with your luster. Laughter from unknowing revellers offends me and I fix my gaze to past horizons, where my passion knew no end, before this shroud of misery enveloped me, In an echo of your pall. Crisp white sheets filled with fragrant breezes Glide the distant yachts to quiet harbours Safe from storms they'll rest peacefully, like you. Whilst I remain, marooned in turmoil. At sea. At loss. Alone.
A lifeless life dawns through my eyes… with nothing but wrongs and no birds in flight the trees are bare the wind is zilch there's a common wisp in the air that makes the oceans lie flat grass won't grow diamonds are coal. Amber is the dust of the crust where the gold dies and cries… Fires cremate but won't create… Fables are fibs and absence… is our new… Light.
If the lovely breeze had a name we could drift together as two dandelion wishes floating wanton on foamy winds. If the river were rolling, gently we could slide in and swim for hours, without rushing and love is like that. Love is like still water standing so deep in a vessel yet so easily broken upon the smallest of stones; scattered, and yet- from this another river begins (as you begin) How lovely if you had a name I would call out to you and I would hear your reply as the wind blowing, the water rushing and not your echoes as you trickled across so many small, jagged stones
His face, withered, gaunt His eyes cloudy, filled with a haunting vacancy His voice weak , shallow Seldom spoken these last difficult days His hair is white and thin His skin, so delicate and discolored The strength has left his fragile body And he lies, waiting Yet I remember the man who was my Father In my youth, so tall and strong His eyes a deep blue with a depth of the seas Thick, wavy, black hair tousled about his head He walked with an unaware arrogance Never knowing that all eyes were upon him This handsomest of men, beautiful, confident No one could match his brilliance, his seductive air Unconscious, innocent of the power he possessed The command he held with peers, a leader of men A bright star in the universe, a life spent searching for answers Politics, Economics, Religion…his battlegrounds Yet, with all his perfection He remained kind and true to all Generous, loving; never an unkind word A light for all who knew him But the cruelty of life is worse for some His body wracked with an unforgiving disease Seizing him, slowly at first…a tremor Then completely, leaving him helpless Dependent upon those who had worshipped his strength Lying in his bed, languished, weak Nearly impossible to eat, difficult to drink Each day descending further into darkness Life's cruelest blow to one so special Chosen by angels as their brightest star So blessed to have loved such a man Still loved, but pitied for the terrible loss For such men were never meant to suffer this fate To fade each day, closer to oblivion He would never have chosen this Broken, suffering silently in stoic resignation Pride now replaced with painful gratefulness He tries to manage a smile His rigid muscles fighting the instinct For he spent his life smiling But old age has given him no peace No time to reflect on the legacy he leaves He waits as life deals its unjust ending For one who was so great, so good I hold his cold, thin hand in mine Holding back the tears that burn I will remember him, the Father whom I have loved I see him walk away, wavy black hair, a cute little wink As he leaves this tired shell, worn, used up Once again becoming the unbroken man I see him strut again, his quick, bouncy steps As he climbs the ladder to the heaven he has earned I hear the trumpets of the angels Welcoming their special creation A man of compassion and ideals My Father, My Daddy…How I will miss him
Spill it all out Where is the light to guide these words? Everything feels gone Empty again So spilling it out is impossible? Yet words still flow through it all Thoughts still run rampant Broken pipework spraying all over the place Rust collecting on the spurting silver Losing very inch of pride Unable to control these lines Pinch it all out Squeeze it like the last bits of toothpaste in a tube Roll it up and twist the remains Pressure is building Tension is steadily, stiffly waiting To be released Let it all go! There is no point anymore Stop building on disaster! Let the words flow Spill the damn mess out And don't clean up Let me pick up the pieces Hand me the mop Because when it is finally all out The emptiness will leave You'll know exactly what to express It will all be clear 4-20-13
Reckless flirtation: The lingering sweetness of wine hindering rationale as lips engage greedily; heated breath intoxicating drunken senses even further. Desire for exploration heightens arousal for the taboo ~ revealing an innate urge to satisfy the hunger within. Casting aside caution in an attempt of sustaining entrancement enables pursuing flesh to connect in frenzied abandonment; propelled by an ache for release necessitated by instinct. And in the aftermath, chilled by impetuosity still moist from the volume of thirst ~ two souls waiver in the realization of their actions, as silent tears of ignominy wash blame from their wringing hands....
She and the handsome gentleman finalized the contract, and he gently placed the antique pearl necklace into the palm of her tiny hand. As he walked away, she fantasized about making love with him, for he possessed both charm and exceptional good looks; he certainly was enchanting...thick, black wavy hair,grey- green eyes...tall...muscular ~ oh, those muscles...all over his tanned body...head to toe. But she wondered about that limp as he walked away, depending on a heavy metal staff for balance... after all, an eternity of beauty and power in exchange for one pathetic soul. The evening of the deed was a frigid six degrees, and there was a dead smell of the sun. She stayed late after work, waiting anxiously until everyone had gone. Finally, he was alone in his office, so she placed the pearl necklace around her fragile neck and unbuttoned her red, silk blouse so to reveal her sexy red camisole. She entered the office, and gently leaned over him from behind; he was aroused by the scent of her "Red Door" cologne...his favorite, and his senses were even more heightened as he turned around and observed her erect breasts speaking in a language only he understood. With his large hands, he slowly explored her thighs, making his way up her black skirt. "You have beautiful legs." "You think so, huh?" They kissed, and the necklace brushed his chest; he didn't feel well, at all. He was hot...so hot, and his body began its metamorphosis, retaining a grayish tinge....then blackish... He burst into flames; then, disappeared along with all omens of the deed. She walked over to the black wrought iron mirror and smiled; her wrinkles were gone...vanished...just as promised; she was ten years younger. The windows began sweating, and the handsome stranger appeared. "I have one more assignment for you." "But we made a deal, one soul." She began to feel peculiar, and as she viewed herself in the black mirror, she began aging...ten years...twenty...thirty...she pulled out a large clump of thin, white hair. The room darkened from his moonly mind. "My dear, the other soul...is yours."
I wish not to see such disgrace, As that which humankind has conjured Greed envelopes all into stout fingers Lust embraces passionate youth Envy breathes in the minds of the conceited Gluttony resides in those who are unfit Sloth exists in those who are uninspired Wrath remains rabid in the permanently livid Pride sits within the excessively bold I wish not to see such disgrace, As that which humankind has conjured.
Complete darkness No sound at all This is where you live No one to talk to The blackness, engulfing Smothering the air out of you In this vast void with lack of light You are forced to believe That you see a speck A tiny green light Way off in the distance This blot of light brings so much hope So many desires You can hardly breath Suddenly the light grows larger You feel elated Then FLASH Complete darkness No sound at all Things are back To the way they will always be
Family is a noun, One that connects Me to you. Bound by blood And DNA. I looked up To you. I thought you were My heroine, Come to save me From the aches and pains That rocked me To the bone Far more than what was known, To sweep me away From all my Nightmares and fears Monsters and tears That were all too real To deal with in the Daylight. Let alone the Twilight. You were a monument Of beauty and grace Strength and compassion. Everything I could ever Hope to be. But then I started to see Past the cracks Of your porcelain face, Behind your false grace, Deep down where You truly lay. And I realized How little I knew Of the true you Besides the bad habits That you keep When you refuse To eat. And when I hear you Scream and weep, Gone is the strength You used to keep, As you try to Convince yourself That her love is true. Because you love her too. And I realized Love is a verb. One I hadn't seen you Act upon in quite Some time. Show me, Don't tell me. Because as you claim That you love me And you love her too There comes a time Where you have to draw A line between The word and The action. Because you don't Know me either. You know I will be There at your Beck and call Wreck and bawl, But you refuse To hear a word Or try to see into My mind The way I try to see Into yours. It's not revolution I ask for. It's simply evolution. As I hear your cries For help I'm suffocating softly, Because I know It's not help you seek. It's pity. And it's a pity, Cause I'm out. Now it's time for The kid in me to Grow Up. You were once My heroine. Now I can see that You don't even care Enough to be my Villain.
My daughter, my Queen as Solomon said, you are above the crown on my head from rubble and stone gates for a throne Queen, daughter, Queen mysterious home of pride and lust forgive me intrust not what man will give but take what you must Power you wield no doubt in my vein the blood that is cold in warmth you will claim what is your position with faith as a seed man whose fruition is boasting to bleed my Queen my throne thorn in my head blessed of water ancient we shed blackened cough scares in the skin Queen have you paid too much for a sin remember the garden fruit of the sun you offered me there a kingdom undone naked your breast no temple of shame I took of your fruit gave you my name Queen prophetic knowing us so Why you embrace our invisible soul sure, God willed or something the same man of the dust woman the rain Queen of a temple so Godless, until Queen, oh my daughter your blossom would heal
I wake-up to a sudden wail probably, someone passed away the whistles of the melancholic tune of the passing winds made a woman weep, as the angels trumpet in no tune now chanting in unison without reason in the midst of forgotten tombstones, of marble rubble, where in silence lies the diary, in which the secret of growing vines could be found, the gardening ways of the ancient gods, yet in flick of time the vineyard will not be the same, as the rake stand rusting as days go by, and his epitaph, engraved from own sweat and blood has revealed that the sweet wine, the true essence of his spirit the glory that he had kept for years, is nothing, but me…
things just arent the same... with you gone its like you were never there like a ghost... haunting my mind haunting my dreams its driving me crazy i sometimes wonder what it would have been like... but no... i dont want to think that it makes you being gone harder to deal with every single day is hell because you left me alone to do this and i cant... im not strong without you it was us...against the world and you vanished before my eyes leaving me to fight but i cant. because every single moment of this life is a struggle you held me up when i was weak and now im left falling forever in this endless hole of pain... drowning in my own tears wishing you were still here to save me but youre not... and im still here. wondering if you were ever real or just my minds way of saving me but you have to have been real i still feel you beside me i still hear your voice... you have to have been real... you have to have been real... were you ever real? but where does this leave me. stuck here in a trance trying to make myself believe trying to remember what your voice sounded like trying to remember your smell trying to remember your laugh the memories are to vivid. too real. so thats it then. youre just a memory to me. maybe thats how its meant to be....
Swirling, chaotic, unending, torturous, darkness. Black as the deepest black, he sits, wondering how could she nurture his dark side. This blinding rage that fills his soul, is so foreign, he's usually so calm, and collected. But she is starting to damage his calm. This music isn't helping, nothing does. It just builds and builds the temperament slowly getting worse and worse. This poison is killing him, if he doesn't release it, he will explode. But where does he turn to let loose the torrential hatred? How can he loose this torment on others and live with himself. To be or not to be violent, THAT is the question. Does he continue to proliferate, or does he release upon the masses. Which is the lesser of two evils, to die from his own abomination, or does he smite those who cause this?
Take my heart, blow my mind. Throw me down, listen to me whine. Speed my pulse, flush my face. Reel me in and off my tracks. Watch my eyes fade to black. Tear me up and crush my soul. Eat my heart out for that is your goal. Darken the sky and chill my skin. Make me throb deep within. Shove my body against a wall. Agressive, mean, and most dangerous of all. Get me going with your touch, Make my blood come out in a rush. Bruise my skin and slit my wrists. Make me clench my dirty fists. Run me over with your madness. Kill me easy, quick, and painless.
Abusive words Thoughts read aloud A shot to my heart They said: I'm the problem in this world I'm the rock in their shoe I'm breaking them apart I'm their problem Maybe it's true Lost in depression Sicker than death It hurts like it, too. They said: I'm the problem in this world I'm the rock in their shoe I'm breaking them apart I'm their problem Maybe it's true Depression sinking deeper My sanity gone Lost control of myself They said: I'm the problem in this world I'm the rock in their shoe I'm breaking them apart I'm their problem Maybe it's true Lost everything in life Struggled for acceptance Instead a stab in my back All because they said: I'm the problem in this world I'm the rock in their shoe I'm breaking them apart I'm their problem Maybe it's true.
I just read the most beautifully written, articulate poem today and envied Why cant I write a poem like that! As I travel through mind sheds Blown out by too much drink. I can neither contend nor describe These descents into darkness. The waking hours when all else sleeps Unravel half truthes sea deep. Do you know how many sheep I have counted Not to be reminded of these frailties That walk this nightly beat. I catch glimpses of grandness Most fleeting at best. This need to govern a life less traveled, solitude filled Quiets the psych of a poet, desperately stilled.
First date I spent the evening wishing you would make the first move. I marked your song but listened from a safe distance. The gap between us elongated like an escalator laying down its treads with the handrail busy, trying playing catch–up. Over dinner the distance between us grew wider. But we carried on as if we were governed by some unwritten rule. But like a fool, I held back least the evening might finish too soon. I surveyed your face for that give away glance. Waited patiently for that inner dance. Hoping that it would surface. But your light remained red even though I was on amber. So I stayed, quiet, still. Smiling, nodding and agreeing. Mirroring your every gesture. Matching your every move. I searched inwardly for a hint of salvation. I searched outwardly for some possible intension. I was hurting like a defeated soldier. I want to know you before you get older. I spent an evening wishing I had made the first move. I marked your song but foolishly maintained a distance.
When her neighbor called out from her old wooden porch "Do you have just a moment, to sit and talk?" She didn't miss a step, just waved and thought I'm too busy my dear, she continued her walk She's a busy lady, she scurries away No time on her hands, to fritter away. A quick farewell, will have to do My hair needs done, and nails do too! No second glance, feeling no regrets. There is always tomorrow, ..., perhaps a chance. That chance didn't come...for one small chat. The old dear died, ...well...that was that. Her ears still ring.....with "Please stop in" Some things too late, will never begin A few years passed, the tables have turned She's been rather sick, and quite infirm She calls out to her friends,........but heads barely turn They throw her a quick wave, and rarely a grin Some paths she has crossed, will not pass again Some things she has done, will haunt till the end
We could smell blood everywhere. Sitting crouched against white, Lifeless marble, Our violins to our chins As crusted black blood Stuck, pleadingly, To our music sheets. We were to summon beauty in hell; To compel the murderous to tears And the dying back to life, but, I could smell blood everywhere. My heart gave out in a Lurching throb. My bow swam against the hair And I, in mind, among the countless wasted. This could happen anywhere. And this happens everywhere. Beauty in hell. The fount of flowers in the black. The smoldering sickness Against sweet-lacquered intentions. Blood is everywhere. As we hunt blindly, stupidly, For the grace of gauze.
I can't bear it anymore.. Waiting for people to arrive Expecting the world to tend to me Hoping the world will just fall into my hands Continuing my laziness and procrastination People liking me and not knowing why Wishing instead of taking action Lacking skills I need to make my life successful Living in a home with no peace or privacy Pretending I'm someone I wish I could be Drawing pieces that fail in competition Writing random lines of complaints Feeling the need for pity Being a hypocrite.. Do I try harder? I've grown too accustomed to laziness Do I wait or at least TRY to take action? I don't have the motivation or the power Am I just making excuses? I probably just need to quit complaining Am I too paranoid? I just care about my life unlike the rest Do I continue? I can't continue in sanity What can I do? I'm too confused to know Where can I scream? Where can I relax? Where is there peace? When will the suffering stop? What is wrong with me? How did I get this way? Who is really there for me? How can I just escape? Too many questions! STOP!!!! ..
~ ~ ~ Oft, in stilly night, while treading shores as one apart Behold my sorrow's reason, the disquiet of my heart My love no more, to bind me to his hand in sweet betroth When last we kissed, amoung the skies and gilded land Now faded gray, with shadowed eyes, an empty hand While' feeble spent and broken, a dove with wounded wing Thy steed thee rode in winter, upon the blackened night Thy rode so boldly o're the moor, so swiftly from my sight Too swift the blade in wrath of angry warrior's battle call The chill my heart, whence by the final gallant fall To Heav'ns gate thy name was called, no more to come again Thine eyes that shone, now dimmed and gone Where whence my love, once like the lilac full The blossom fragrant, o' so sweet as whippoorwill By cold winds now with frost are sadly taken Ere' slumber's chain has bound me, tho fate that has forsaken Still linked to thee forever, I will ever be With day, by sun awakened, again I must recall Thy song has waned, the garland dead Whence dost thy storm to bring my tears Yet still thy gentle singing to my ears Thou said adieu, my love to keep My swollen heart with anguish weeps.~~
A child No more than 12 years old Sees images of women Thin Beautiful Rich Wanted She looks in the mirror She doesn't see the image Her body doesn't fit the mold Movies, TV and magazines Tell her she is not what they want She is not thin She is not beautiful Everyday her eyes cry as she looks at who she is The perfect her hidden within The beautiful soul they will not let her see She diets She starves Still she does not fit the mold She feels unloved Unwanted Eating less than a cracker a day Throwing up the scant food she eats Her body changes Wasting away They make her up She wears a beautiful white dress They close the lid Denied the perfect her The person she should have been She lies in eternal rest But she is loved She is wanted She will be missed
The Hours of Alzheimer 12 It starts ticking away slowly Longer needed to search what's known. Watching the hand jerk Minutes passing "Twelve is for noon, then?" "Yes. Yes, Daddy! Just like that. Twelve noon is lunch." 3 Very gently, oh so sweetly, Out of love and kindest thought Offering words and filling fissures Keeping pace and instant beating "The, oh, you know, the oh how silly, the the box thing" "Yes, the box thing, the clock, Daddy. Says it's 3 and time for tea." 6 Now impatience starts its tapping Chasms stretching longer still Wanting this moment to stop its running "I I please fork I I food" "Oh, of course, dear Daddy. Dinner time. Here, your fork. " 9 Interval waxing Memory waning Lingering in the distance This cavity expanding " I I I I" "Oh it's last course time Daddy. Some dessert, then time for bed." 12 Midnight falling Thoughts abandoned Cadence silent Dead of night First published: Poetry Quarterly
A lot of lessons learned./ I sip this Hennessey and fought the burn./ My mind is clouded with so many memories./ I hear your voice "Boy pick yourself up off your knees"./ But I wonder why God would take you away from me./ Please Lord I need some clarity./ Nothing makes sense. I cry, I can't lie nor deny I'm drowning in my own dark obscurity./ The pain remains inside./ Eating me alive./ I wonder without you if I'll survive./ I try and hide from the responsibilities in my life, but have no success./ So I'm left with this heartache in my chest./ Tears roll down my cheek./ Does that make a man weak?/ God I need to know./ Was it just her time to go?/ So many times I sit down attempting to express what I was feeling,/ but my heart and mind wasn't willing./ Nothing I wrote seemed to be enough,/ to compliment you and your motherly love./ Every time I thought of you I felt like balling up in a fetal position and dying./ I could not write about you without breaking down and crying./ For awhile I carried a bad attitude./ Looking for an excuse to accuse anyone in my family forever disrespecting you./ I think about all the tears my grandmomma shed./ I wished her alive and everyone else dead./ Was it my imagination or was it your pretty face I saw in the clouds?/ I hope you're looking down on me and you're proud./ And you're hearing my voice right now somehow./ I wish there was a button I could push to rewind./ So I can tell you what's on my mind./ Kiss your check./ Have you speak./ Hold you just one more time./ Your passing took away my energy./ You said you would never leave me./ You were always so honest./ So when you broke your promise,/ It left me confused./ I felt cheated and my soul was bruised./ Con't in Pt 2
Eyes playful with insecurity-- I've seen them innocent, coy, enticing and distraught--all teasing masculinity! I've seen them in disbelief, slicing to what's left of me; hurting her was easy-- she was fragile! Protecting her from others was easier than from myself, and how sleazy that I'd betrayed her trust by way of another. Had I lied when I said I loved her? As for that, I don't quite know. What I do know is I hurt her-- when I could've made her glow with magnitude. They say brown eyes make the best liars, and in this case, I don't regret the lie, for in that brief fit of desire, I allowed inhibitions to die. Blame him? I am unwilling to begrudge on behalf of one clear and specific point-- he allowed me his imitation love, and our bodies, this love did anoint. Engulfed in the music my mind plays, my heart becomes my soul's own lyre. Though I'm aware it's just a phase, my heart still loves her brown eyed liar.
On gossamer wings she floats through thoughts of timeless dreams and pages unturned. Words written but left unread for years as centuries turn to new. Her course was set before her time, now deep within she feels her fragile heart even as it breaks again. New words to write of courage or loss, or words perhaps of gossamer wings that carry her home.
Tonight as my baby girl started to pray She said God it's 8 O'Clock, And God We need to talk. She said daddy help me pray, And daddy bow your head, As we knelt beside her bed. she said God can you hear me? Mommy always said you'd hear me, If I would learn to pray, And that you would show me the way. Well God I don't understand. Why you took my mommy away. Daddy always says i'll understand, When I grow up some day. She said God, you need your son. Well I need my mommy to, And I know that my daddy, Would be happier with mommy. Cause daddy talks to her, And mommy's not even there. God can you please, Give my mommy wings, So she can come to see us. She always kept our house clean, And God I know, She keeps your house clean to. And God I miss mommy's big hugs, Daddy says your son gives hugs to. So I know if my mommy had wings, She could hug me and daddy. Well God I want to thank you, For being there to listen, And God think about what I said. And tell mommy that I love her, And God I love you to. Oh just one more thing God, Help my daddy stop crying. Thank you God, Amen, Then she turned to me and said, Goodnight daddy, I love you. I was still on my knees, Beside my little girls bed, With tears running from my eyes. I gave my baby a goodnight kiss, And said sweet dreams baby girl. Then I went to my room, And kissed my wife's picture, And with tears in my eyes, I knelt down to pray, I said God, We need to talk.
As the wind grew, and the clouds rolled in, the droplets of rain hit my page. I continued to write. Nothing was going to stop me. I, was going to finish. It started to rain harder. thunder cracked, and lightning flashed. Soon, my writing was smudged. As I continued to write, a thought came to mind. Was this the life I had wanted? Or was I just a puppet, in the hands of someone else? I had finished, and just in time. My world grew dark. I knew this was the end. I had written my will, as I knew this day had come. It was time for me to go, and leave it all behind. I, was done here.
The sun was blaring down That August afternoon When Jesse came into the town Of Early Blossom Bloom The sun had blistered up his skin His shoes were worn and tired The clothes he wore upon his back Was all that he acquired Jesse was a loner Traveled light and all alone No family he could speak of No place to call a home For food and basic shelter He would trick upon the street For a twenty dollar bill His throat would be a treat His body aged and weary From the life now forced to live A new found way of living No man had chose to give The effort once put forth Strength he no longer had To earn an honest living A concept he didn't have What would come of Jesse No trade to call his name In life he loved so many men Each one a different way But love for him was just a fix An action he would show Not something that would stick around And nourish his inner soul He travels to the city In hopes to find a friend One last fool to take Before giving up his sin But in this town There was no one To cater Jesse's ways No place for him to go and stay Or a simple bed to lay He sat down on the park bench As dusk filled up the sky Weary from the journey made In hunger he did cry In life he played a hell of a dance No partner came to stay Deep down afraid The city streets Would be his home to stay In Jesse's heart was anger For the people passed him by Not one kind word was spoke to him He sat alone and cried His prayers of some compassion Were seemingly unheard This was life for him now Banished from the world He died that night a lonely man On the park bench all alone Laid to rest in a lonely grave The place he now calls home The life and times of Jesse Now just a memory He was a man most would forget For shame of his company Think back on the life and times That Jesse brought to earth Would you have shown compassion? If you seen him all alone Who is to say who is to judge For a life lived on the streets For Jesse it was all he knew And all he could ever be
Melodious kaleidoscope of broken glass, Its mosaic montage consumes lost encounters; a toasting ceremony for what perished. Committed specialization expires unrewarded. Sand dollars of short-sightedness decorate the exacting goddess of broken importance. Sliced open, laid bare, and reassembled, the vintage gown of fractioned fragments unites again with the society of tarts and cakes. The time bundle of formulated heartbeats, pulsate expansion and contraction into the altered ambiance of passion's fragrant fable.
Part 1 Onion the delicacy of friendship I found you in the flowers Standing tall we become one Looking down from gangly towers Squash, you burn, you pillage, son. Follow me you say in tongues Thy shallow mind reveal me tell Whisper lies clean load the guns I feel the burn I rot in hell Friend folly menacing the liar I loathe this coffin how it leaks Dear foe you raped me set on fire The onion peal itself and weeps Part 2 Traitor dear monkey boy Older eyes eat themselves, glance and kill the other Unified in the dance, they steer the musty rudder. Pained and sweeter deeper wells, poised buckets drunk with water. Singled out the one that dried, handed weights to pull him under. Wiser times capture the mind, death justifies dishonor. Knife slice neat through the devil's back, who stares blank and milks the udder. Part 3 Tempest patron saint Inside this box Goodbye tempestuous fall My puppet of steel coiled thread Smashed buttons and twisted dread, Alarm these doors, and Escape this delusive bunker bed Stamp the spiders Thief, vulture of the deflection The mocking patron of the sinners Erase this affliction Relating inward at the reflection Rise you fool Part 4 Phoenix i love you close the grip cinched hematic grip drenched, clawing seeking the sheave becoming the counterweight i absorb, now extracting the heat rise like a phoenix away to be gone to be free fix me! i have fixed me i am alive and i love you Part 5 Aye, Damager Abolish her state of disrepair Scattered, spattered drippy thoughts All around this box of soused leaves Soak, ferment in the faith of our love I can't fix this, you know I loathe this misunderstanding Of what I am speaking, projecting To me, Aye Damager, to you This devil in me turned and twisted A wrecked elevator in rejection Years locked painfully aware ...
I'm working through the night so I won't fall asleep for every time I do, into my dreams you seep the one that broke my heart the one that saw me feel the only one I love the one that was too real. I'll concentrate on life without it's summer days, the winter in my heart, beats sunburn on my face. The cold wont reach my skin, the sunny smile prevails, it hides from all the world my blackend, charred remains. You'll never see me hurt, I'm much too proud for pain, I'd rather die inside, Then let you know you've maimed.
dedicated to my deceased only brother, joshua i'll stay with you, as long as the wind blows i'll always be in your heart you know i didn't leave you all alone i am of eternal essence my spirit is within you live my life for me do all that i cant do be the one that i once was conceal the chances known as a flaws and if contentment immerses herself or sorrrow fills the air you will hear my moral and you'll know that i am there there for you when you cant see theres more to life than missing me i wish you well, my sister, dear for keep your chin up and wipe that tear
How like the pumpkin you seem to me; arriving full-blown from the seed planted in my womb. You grew wild and free among the tamer fruits of life. I can still hear an echo of your laughter. Vines and tendrils wound about you in infancy long past. We were pulled apart by my growth and yours. I long for the blossoming days of infancy and childhood, for the wee small one who never failed to make me smile, for the adult who sprang Jack-o-lantern whole into a world of normalcy refusing to accept the mundane. Can you not see me? Did you not know me? Was I never the gardener to you? The garden now lies, overrun by last years Halloween's delights, allowed to run their course, and in doing so trampling the ripe tomatoes, and green bell peppers as you do, my heart, by forgetting.
I can't remember if the sun was shining Or if the clouds looked down on me as I stood A child of ten standing on a window sill Whispering to himself he should It started shortly after I woke Distant where the trigger was I'm guessing just the overflow of everything they did and said Finally ground down by all around And though I'd fought for years Death becomes a friend When she's the only one there for you Knowing I would soon be in the playground Where no nurse could make better the names they cruelled Knowing my mothers boyfriend was down stairs Waiting for his latest vile whim to unfold My mind consumed by every name called I was not the same they proved Alone in my crowded thoughts T o death I looked for belonging As I dressed my imagination dreamt What could happen today? Exploding into the unknown My strength rapidly dissolved I could see no directions that didn't lead to another painful day As my journey to the end begun All they told me loading the gun All that made me different from Pushing me closer and closer to the edge of no return In front of the mirror I stood Cut off my curly hair No longer the golliwog That their taunts would compare I covered my skin in talcum powder As I didn't want to be That horrible thick coon he always called me. My hair a mess My colour unmasked Tired, Frightened, alone, I decided enough, enough Standing on the window sill The last bastion for survival colliding inside As the exhausted wishes to hang on Were overcome by the desperation to escape this hollow excuse for life No single tear a cry for help As id learnt they choose not to hear I urge myself towards an end to the hurt where the crying would clear As I engulf my mind in my final moments And call for death to take my hand From across the road a woman called To this day she probably doesn't know she saved my life Tears unintentionally Created rivers down talcum powdered cheeks But my mother didn't laugh when she found me I guess that's where you'd expect everything to be made right I guess that's where I learnt to no longer believe Through every promising word in the wake of what could They didn't do what they should
This is how I come to fade! oh baby I once loved you. oh I once loved you!! My heart is aching for you, now. My love for you cries out! it cries out! oh oh this is the way you have made me. This is the way I have come to fade. Oh baby I once loved you.
I remember! Cranking that old wore-out handle on that ice cream maker, until I thought my arms were going to fall off. Having a big smile on my face, as I turned and turned, pushed and pulled on that old crank begging my big brother, the whole time to "Spell me!" so I could set on an old rag on top of the ice, using my weight (as it was) to hold that ice cream maker in place. I remember my grandfather coming out of the house, out on the back porch. To make sure my big brother and I was "Doing it right." as if, there was a wrong way! He made sure that we had plenty of ice, plenty of rock salt. I can still see him sticking his little finger in the weep-hole to make sure it didn't get stopped-up. That was most important to him, as he always got the first bowl. I don't know why? He clamed, he would get the first bowl, to make sure that salt didn't get into the mix. Funny to me, he never made a salty face as he was eating that first bowl. I remember, watching my grandmother making that "mix" she picked the freshest eggs, measured just the right amount of vanillin extract, I loved the way her kitchen smelled. I watched her chop the bananas peal the peanuts, stir it up with the cream and sugar. She hummed "Old Rugged Cross" as she made that sweet ice cream mix, it was as if she was having fun; like the turning of the crank for us boys, work for sure but still fun! I would eat light, as that banana-peanut ice cream cured while we had supper, waiting for grandfather to finish his third helping, we had to wait, he always got the first bowl, I don't know why?
For the love of man That which I see So hollow and empty (Like a casket yet filled) Yet still, something inside cries For empty arms have what to hold At what cost Should life be bought (The price of war) Over love that's sought I shall take my penitence As well as my leave For it is our choice That which we believe You know my disadvantage is having no Poetic knowledge. I I looked up E.E. Cummings and read some of his poem's and I have no idea if this poem will be acceptable, but hey I tried.
When hearts get broken, Real tears fall. I sit there hoping I can show you all. My heart's desire is all I want Fight fire with fire; you'll be gaunt. Time is essence of the heart That teaches me lessons that tear me apart. My thoughts lessen and I cry You shouldn't be messing with me I want to die. A river forms behind my eyes The love I once had for you dies. Take the arrow, aim it straight; Hit my heart and fill me with hate. Listen up and beware: My thoughts are churning No, I don't care. Time is shortening; you must hurry Death is threatening. My vision is blurry. I hate to say this And you I will miss I wish I had one last kiss.
I've watched her vanish and dietirate into withering roses. The pain that takes over her body is spreading fast and furious, and only weakens her! How can she bring so much light into a room of darkend souls, with her smile, When she has only those two weeks to remain? Why her a mother and new bride? She doesnt want to miss a thing in her young boys lifes. But... she already knows how it will be and how it will come. Six days, six days she had before the death withen her took one last breath, and she vanished into the atmosphere and left.
A gift like no other gift, one that can't be bought a precious human being, deserving the right to live to exist as we all do, but sometimes it just doesn't happen that way, A baby of no harm, a baby of no sins a baby of pure love, and only innocence Tender moments, carrying wishes disappointments, everyday misses Sitting there all alone, even though I was surrounded, by others While wondering, why it may be that I am made to suffer, Wanting nothing more, but to die inside and out, Things happen for a reason, so I was taught I'll never know the reason, but I'll always feel the loss The loss of my child, my baby was taken away from me, and there is no reason I constantly ask myself, why did this happen? what did I do wrong? I asked God to save my baby, to protect us both I remain here, but my baby is gone It seems as if, my whole world, just fell apart and all I could do, was sit back and watch it happen I found myself, feeling lonely needing someone, anyone to hold me All I could do was cry, I had to cry, for the sake of myself for the sake of my baby, for the sake of my heart I had to weep I cried and cried aloud, hoping to be heard please father, I'll do whatever you want you have my word, just please save my baby I bled so much, had so much pain denied to myself, everything would be okay Crying and pleading, praying and weeping became an everyday routine, it was so hard to believe this was happening to me, It's not over yet, it never will be everyday and every night, it's in my memory... (March 1998) My sweet baby you will always be with me...
Ants are known to be industrious, Bustling about the anthill In lines and arcs and freeform patterns, Intent on some important insect mission, Minding their own business, thank you. Of course, sometimes ants have to be exterminated If they're likely to bite a small child, Or interrupting the flow of one's flower bed, Or just plain in the way. After all, they're only bugs, Small and inconsequential and expendable. Occasionally, small rough and tumble boys, Full of bravado and challenging each other, Will desecrate an anthill recklessly Just for sport… And to see the ants run frantically In response to the destruction of their entire world At the whim of a dirty-sneakered foot. They look so small from up above Scurrying about like ants Tiny and insignificant from the height Of a skyscraper, or a ski lift, Or the windshield of a fighter pilot's plane. Tiny, and in the way Because, as we all know, Sometimes ants have to be exterminated.
A shadowed cloud drops upon this day Here, it comes to haunt our hearts But do not falter at it's persistence And wipe away your tears For on this gloomy day we shall smile Smile for what was there instead, instead of crying for what is gone. To each his own, but hold a friend For in the day of the shadowed cloud, You will have someone to lean on And never be alone-for surely, Surely the cloud will return But thus your faithful friend is near
This is hard to live with everyday Thinking and wondering was it me. Did i do something to hurt my unborn child I know where my baby is, they feel no pain I love you with all my heart and i will never forget you If i have anymore children they will know of you I think about you all the time I wonder whose eyes you had How tall would have been If you would have been a Daddy's girl Or a Mommy's boy Would you have been sporty like me Would you have been smart like me and Daddy I wonder what you would have been when you grew up I know most of these questions will be answered when i reach the other side Mommy and Daddy love you very much I know eventually the pain will start to fade But you memory will always be in my heart. Love you Always Mommy
It is a house That was once a home. Now with its eyes boarded up, It has lost its heartbeat. No longer does he hear Her faltering fumbling with the key When he has to visit. Guilty memories are buried deep Within him,just like his mother. His sister tearfully packed the boxes, Precious few treasures Consigned to cheap oblivion. Soon will arrive the house clearance people, The necessary hyenas of a crowded modern life, To leave no trace of her story Save the little blot Burned brown On the third step of the stairs.
Crying into my pillow each night Tears for a sorrow that burns like an acid Eating it's way through my senses..through my soul. The pain sears through me like burning coals No peace. Hard to get my mind clear and rational To put those things into perspective.. Or so I am told by well-meaning others who do not know, The suffering of my existence; my inability to cope No peace. My head throbs in almost a familiar rhythm A melody of self-pity, for regret, for salvation And the tears, still flowing, now echoed with muffled sobs For the agony is nearly more than I can withstand No Peace. I pray to a God I do not know, nor care to But no one else is there to listen to my pleas for comfort To make right all those mistakes As there are so many choices and I haven made the wrong ones No Peace So the God I do not acknowledge, lies silent in the stillness And the burning within begins to subside As grateful sleep falls upon me at last Until another night comes, and the thoughts begin again No Peace.
They told me..forget it..! They confused me.. They ordered me... "Control your thoughts.." Whenever I see flowers... My heart leaps with joy.. But when I reach near... They wither............. Whenever I see babies... My heart leaps with joy.. But when I reach near... They cry....... Whenever I look in mirror, It frightens me......... THE SCAR !
The decanter is filled with chicory blooms (blue, for the sky is her pleasure) while the snapshot turns nigrescent marking rain for the evening weather The ring with which they two had wed lay gilded 'round her finger With her eyes closed oboes quarreled 'gainst the scent of him, that lingered. Her languish comes but once a day She turns to the mackerel sky and sits upon her lonely porch In sight the ibis fly. She remembers sweet the sparkling mint his eyes had held in winter and the rush of tangling wild wars they waged when he did kiss her. As evening falls the grass gives up it's scent from dew to rain and again her footsteps lead her to a solitary grave.
in the distance i see you and i call you back; I WANT YOU BACK........ and you turn.... look at me with a split-second of for-EVER in your eyes then...as you are so good at doing you use that devil i don't care smile and disappear right there in the crystal swirling liquid of my tears there is a whispering... "i will wait.... yes, i will wait next time." by janetta
Liquid tears fallen rain down my face emotional droplets caressing skin bittersweet hearts cracked in half drowning passions in a sea of blue floating away stranded feelings oceans streaming soaking sand dissolving dreams crushing hope into pieces of losing you.
Loud shall the darkest days speak, tired and fed! That there isn't a truth in the word love, For they had shed the tears in colour red, Like blood from the heart of a dying dove. Long had the cowards played games with you, they knew your heart was innocent in soul, that your heart shall make no complaint or sue, The devils, in the love-mask, those played foul. not a sight of true love yet touched your heart, as it shall not come in the devils mask, and never can it tear your heart apart, as it sounds no easy for them, a task. Wait for the true love that shall take your hands, With true spirits that you never have seen, in this world or heaven and fairy-lands, taking you to the depths you never been. So, let your wings row high upon the sky, For you will find your new love from its height, That fills your heart, full, with roses of shy, while worlds spin envied taking off their sight. ©Anees Rahman
Wake up a little earlier; another troubled night But the remnants of pre-birthday make-up still do their job remarkably Smile for the camera; these pictures are keepers, so realistically modelled for Thank yous for unthoughtful offerings; why hurt feelings after all? A dozen friends all come along; it's not their scene but they want to please me Can't look over there, have to be the last to go through the door They're trying so hard, all their love gathering on my windowsill Some cards handmade with heartfelt affection, gifts so vague and cliched, more roses than I could care for And your dusty eyes still staring through them all from behind the frame Complete the scene as my headstone Couldn't have slept at all Excitedly imagining what you were planning Warm in your jacket you gave me to sleep in Wouldn't lift or lower my foolish head Jitters looking forward to you Flash could've gone off but we wouldn't notice Shroud me with your words, promises you could not keep All the guests combined; a less than you companion I wonder why we couldn't make it through? And I'd never had to say goodbye 'til the day that I met you All that I'd got for we pushed them all out And I didn't miss them. Didn't miss them. Why are you still asking after me? How do you still reach into my eyes Before I turn away? What happened to let us get like this and tell me When can it end? How is it I want it to stay? Though there's a soft spot for you in my heart and you're Slowly seeping out Frozen as this face remains Breaking when I'm forced to recall I'm 18 and you're not here But she passed on your message for me Happy Birthday. And in those obligated words it all crashes back I'll keep all our secrets and ignore all the rest The world we made and left to decay Keeps me smiling for every wasted day.
Like shooting stars my idols have come to pass They left their mark then died too fast Melodic chords and crooning voices Their music lives on in a world full of choices Songs of anger, songs of love, songs of sadness or all of the above My idols have come to pass Inspiring artists for many generations From their own minds with musical creations So their stars we admire from a distance Only to follow with some resistance My idols have come to pass
At gray fabric offices, cubicles divide us— turn us into refuges with mock privacy, as overheard conversations drip from lips endlessly smacking. Sometimes it seems insanity squared— nothingness randomly speaking in tongues to cubicles with no one there. We thumb tack individuality loosely to coarse fabrics— arms stretched out from wall to wall, as mouths open to mirrored silences we never scream.
I'm sitting on a park bench…in the rain Crying, with no one to console me… I lost my family…and I lost my friends And what's worst is that my love left me… I never knew that loneliness could hurt so much And I never thought that it could happen…to me Well I guess I was wrong… These tears of mine won't stop falling down my face With every tear that drops, it represents The pain I caused everyone in my life… I can't turn back time, though I wish I could And correct all of my mistakes and live happily! Now I walk home alone…with nothing On my mind, except for misery… I sit in the corner…where it is dark So that I can escape reality… I never knew that sorrow would hurt me at all Because I believed that I was too strong for that But I guess that I was wrong… The pain in my chest won't go away With every tear that drops, it represents The loneliness that I experience everyday in my life… I only pray that God above will Help turn my miserable life around for me! These tears of mine won't stop falling down my face The pain in my chest won't go away With every tear that drops, it represents The pain I caused everyone in my life… I can't turn back time, though I wish I could And correct all of my mistakes and live happily! With every tear that drops, it represents The loneliness that I experience everyday in my life… I only pray that God above will Help turn my miserable life around for me!
I loved you... But i guess it was a joke, as I lay here and cry You live life happy As I cared so much for you And in the end, I get hurt Everyday goes by But I am still waiting without you You are constantly on my mind When I think of happy times I start to cry When you broke my heart I said things Things that were wrong I feel so bad about it When I try to tell you You act like you don't know me I did things to hurt you But it came back in my face So please forgive me Forgive my mean side I did it out of love I did it out of anger You were someone really special You made my day I felt so good with you You are the sweetest person to be with When it ended I wanted to ruin my life Then something said he would come back But after a while, it got worse Everyday I think of you How I should feel so sorry I wish I could tell you I wish you would understand, What you meant to me How you hurt me, How I hurt you. Maybe one day you will make some girl Feel as special as you made me feel. Treat her well. Love her. Make her feel special. But always remember, I miss you. I will never forget you. The fun we had together. Never forget me Also that you are special to me...
Powder dreams and acid queens Snow white bliss and razor blades Rails so thick your heart will bleed Find your fix so you'll succeed Uppers, downers, sweet cocaine Every demon has a name All that matters is the fight To stay alive and in the light It hurts so bad right through the core You fear two words and that's coke whore Cut so deep to feel alive With every shot you build your pride The fiery rush and burning lust Nothing else matters f*** their trust A slip, a fall is all it takes To see you land back on your face The heart that breaks can't take no more Your soul is gone thrown on the floor The pills you pop the smack you shoot The crack you cook the lines you toot The midnight toke that liquid courage That blissful coke won't be discouraged Rapping, tapping on your door Claiming your body take some more A stressful day a slip from grace A couple more makes my heart race The walls cave in two worlds collide I wait in horror as my heart dies A crash of sound a rush of red Crimson tears are filled with dread The sirens fade and fall away Too late for fate this ends today
Please don't cry I'm here when you sleep As soon as you lie My love is still here You should have no fear Just wait a while It will all be clear My voice you will hear Pleasant to your ears My words become a sponge Wiping away your tears To my baby My sweet little lady To my baby I will love daily Let my words Let you know that I love you Cradle you as you sleep And hug you With a feeling so deep And my voice you know so well Rest with you and dwell
If I could catch the world in a bottle Would it be worth having? It would hold hopes and dreams Shared by billions of souls All of the love ever shared would be locked away Protected from those who wish to end it People would life their lives Not knowing that they are sheltered Maybe if they knew they wouldn't care I would never know Looking from the outside I could only watch Alone, separated by a thin wall of glass I could only watch as others met and fall in love Starting their own families they thrived They became happy and grew While I could only watch Holding the world in a bottle
Sorry its not you its me Your perfect Your everything that I want I can see myself with you I really can Its just that I nolonger trust men I want to be along There's no such thing as love Or trust I like you I do Its just I have trust issues
I know all the stories that she'd told she been livin in lies she knows shes doin wrong.All i know is she need to do right. I can't keep oncryin momma s do it just please no more fights. I tell myself that she will do better, momma we are a family ain't we supposed to bo together. What happened to our happy fun. Every since that doy violence but more guns. You used to give me hugs what happened to all the kisses, all the good times yes we allmisses.We can forget abut it momma thanks to you. You can't play me nomore i'm not a little fool. I try so hard but why can't you stop. One day i just wish you will and IT gonna drop.
How do words change the science of you to me? My heart deems you know but you beg me go. Anyway.
This booth i'm in , you call a body apparent problems , wiring shoddy can't get thru all the busy signals rush of the race , eluding victuals can't get thru with simple affection are they harnessed wrong , disconnection is comprehension a distant voyage where i'm now speaking a foreign language is the dark pit of self so deeply entrenched where thirst for knowledge will never be quenched long distance calls from this booth i'm in dialing the right number is where to begin as long as i remain on the right frequency at least avoid world's subsequent delinquency..... Food for thought , all for naught line is open , if it's sought.........
1. My grapefruit tanned toothpicks bow above the five-day flattened spot in an olive shag carpet tracing grandpa Leo's blueprint, with one encapsulated toe – this is the femur, this is the head, this is the fist, the ring finger, the soul. I search for any blunt white quivering slivers of Caroline's purported fly fetuses. 2. Huddling behind the corpse of an old hospital bed, a framed photo smoke browned and wearing my toddler face, watches his children choke hushed, broken sentences this will be yours, my plate, separate the holiday china… an enigmatic language that hovers in smoke stretched rings to wilt upon the hallway bulb. 3. I am left the ceramic cygnet, and an ivory carved dromedary. These artifacts plucked from his porcelain menagerie that I decipher through dust fingerprints for one small inheritance of a memory. 4. Tomorrow, Aunt Rose puts price to his bibelots, the olive shag carpet, even cousin Amy's plastic horse, who was accidentally left to pasture on an afghan. A silver plated glass cage image of her past, she says she will whittle all of him, from the wooden house bones.
Somewhere within your silence, I've become a nomad, wandering helplessly around the barren desert you've created, hopelessly searching for the illusive mirage that you've become. Yet all I see is the vast sunlit horizon, that I'll never reach. It's all in your hands now, I am just a broken soul aimlessly wandering. I beg you, show me your mirage, let me bask in it's beauty, let me hear the tender sounds of your poetic waterfall, and let me be healed, by your gentle, cool, calming breeze, flowing within my soul once more.
I see you in my dreams, laughing, eyes merrily dancing you fill my heart with love, my soul with kissed promises But when I awake from this rainbowed dream where all the edges are bound with colored ribbons of hope I find you standing at the end of my bed, eyes sunken and hollowed a black crow, perched upon the limb of your own destruction Your addictions gnawing away at your being are all that appear no light exudes from your presence, darkness has enveloped you has stolen your future and our dreams, like a thief that slipped by, so quietly unseen all that is left are the bright images of the past, where we are captured in moments of suspended happiness They frequent every corner of my mind and visit me in my subconscious If only I could but remain in that deepest void you would be as you were, our future would be as it always should have been I close my eyes and block out your image that has tainted my present reality choosing to dwell upon the scattered pictures and remain blissfully peaceful in my own ignorance For the person that you were is forever lost to me, gone, swallowed whole of us there is but an empty vacuum, a succession of days, until the end
I keep hearing that you exist. People say they see you- They touch you. They say you help them when depressed, sad and lonely. They say you keep people together- forever. Some even say you do not work all the time; You have a tendency to fade away- Only for a short time, however, For you can return to set things back to norm. I'm curious- love. Do you really return?- Do you really fade away?- Do you really keep people together- forever?- Do you really console the depressed, sad and lonely?- For I am sad, lonely and depressed. Will not you help me? Why ignore me?- Or forget me? Why listen to what others have to say about me? I tried to reach for you too- You just could not see. For sadness, depression and loneliness kept you blind; Blind from watching my hands reach out to you... You fell- Long gone- Never came back. Do not worry- I keep hearing that you exist. Tis' true?- Do you really- Exist?
So tired is my soul this eve, and my heart hangs heavy within me, I've finally purged to the paper, the words I've needed to for so long, although a release, a strange sort of relief, I grieve too for meanings lost somewhere between the lines and your soul. My intentions so deep, I drowned myself beneath them. Yet finally, after purging my angst, I shall rise to the surface, and live freely once again.
I'm the shadow man - Thinly tracing every step you take I'm there, always there Pressing near and yet apart Just a shadow of a man I'm the shadow man - Don't look back or down I will be hiding Beneath a footstep or a cloudy sky But I'm there, always there Just a shadow of a man Pressing near yet apart Treading lightly here and there I can't be loved And I won't be ignored So lend me your hand And stay close if you can Everyone needs somewhere to be Even a shadow man
Mister, Why did you hit Mommy? Mister, You can't punish me, You're not my daddy! Mister, You say not to hit, But your actions declare you a hypocrite. Mister, You push Mommy down, But you say not to tell unless I say she fell. Mister, I try my darnedest to be good, But you say I'm not action like I should. Mister, You hurt my feelings, But you say you're just teaching me something with meaning. Mister, You come home with more than just Mommy, But you say I saw nothing Mister, The night you came home drunk, You know the night you shot Mommy with a shotgun . . . The night you left her beaten, bruised, scarred, Bleeding on the ground. . . The night she went to sleep and never woke up That night I was left alone, Helpless, Nowhere to go. Mister, Why did you do it When you said you loved Mommy? Mister, Why did you leave me stranded When you said you cared about me? Mister, Because of you I am left here to die Beside this dumpster where you told me to lye. Mister, I've been waiting here like you said, For days, Weeks, Months, But you r face I have not seen You have let me down, Mister, But that is nothing new. You always told me to be a good child, So I will. With what's left of me, I will wait, Calling your name . . . Mister . . . ? Mister . . . ?
Like, this one time, in band camp I asked this girl out and she like, Said no, and I like Like totally liked her, and like I almost loved her and she said like, Like, like no, Like how could she? I was so hurt, like, seriously Not like, broke a nail hurt, like really, Really, Really, Really hurt, you know? Like it wasn't even in my head you know? Well, it was, but it was like, deeper than that It was right in my chest, like right by my heart Every time it beat, it like, hurt And it like, didn't stop Not for anything, Like not even when I went to sleep, It like, just hurt, and hurting And like, like never stopped It hurt like, so bad It was like the worst feeling I ever felt, Like in my entire life, How could she say no like that? Like really? I like, lost her Totally lost her But I like never had her to begin with, Still it hurt, because I like almost loved her And it felt like she was mine, but she wasn't And like, now she'll never be. This is like, sooo depression, How can I march in a time like this? I just totally feel deprived of happiness and meaning, I could die, I could totally die right now Like I'm not even kidding, I could stop living Right now, just die, I could go to that cabin and get on the roof Then like get onto that higher roof on the cabin next to it And then like, totally jump off and die Just die like a frog under a tire you know? "Not a lesbian" she says, well whatever I can't believe this, this is so sad You know, this is so bad, you know what I'm going to do? You know what I'm going to do? I'll like, tell you I'm going to go eat some cheese, Goodbye.
The child was lost Through no fault of mine I wanted to have it But it wasn't the right time I hid my emotions I didn't want to mourn But I couldn't help it It didn't want to be born I didn't tell a single person Until a long time after Then someone close to me Went and told the father I'd had a miscarriage And he didn't even care If the child had been born He wouldn't have been there After he'd been told And he talked to me I cried for days on end But my tears no one had seen I shut myself away And hid inside my room I lay cuddling a teddy I held it against my womb But years have passed I think I'm over it now I know it never developed But I still miss it somehow
She once said on a stormy night before the first drop of rain graced tongues: "Passion is overrated. It's out of style" The crack of clouds blew grey into her face at that moment. Umbrellas turned their skin inside out The surf tasted it's own salt and spat it out in disgust The black beyond broke rain capsules and sang in thunderous laughter. Passion. Lost? Misplaced? Nonessential?? We caught her up in our raincoats and hurried her into the nearest cafe. Three hot coffees and her chattering lips. Steam in swirly rings 'round her fingers as she shook. As she cried. Passion swarmed out of her words and caught the cafe on fire It burned while we sat there Peeling paint and freezing fingers Raining sky in midnight's palm We listened as she brought up memories All ignited, having slept long past deadlines of ardor. We cried with her in conundrum dreams and kept the burnt out structure erect by our finger tips to scaffold. A woman grieving should not be disturbed. Suddenly, her words made sense. The sky cleared Her eyes swallowed their blue and returned the ocean to it's salt We held hands, stretched across a cherry red booth reflecting every broken capillary in her gaze. Sisters united in empathy's grasp a circle of an undivided enclave We stepped over the ashes of her memories and walked her home despite her obstinate refusal for one of us to stay over. Count down to 3am and the petunias lining her front walk kissed her ankles with the thanks of rain She smiled and passionately picked the velvet purple and placed it in our palms. We saw the full spectrum of rainbows and heartaches and growling thunder on the verge of lost adherence to love all on her face in one evening That night, she went home alone, to sleep on her side of the bed with the shivering almost subsiding into the faintest scent of brewing hope.
Here it comes again - That scratch-eyed, skin-split creature of the night. Here it comes again To invest my soul And scrape at old markings that once held promise. Here it is again In that brittle, dirty little hour Where there is no hiding. Here it is again, Love's decay, the puss-sore that never healed, The sweet pain of yesterdays. In that hour when no one hears a whisper Or a soul turn over, That little, muddy hour When substance lies at the bottom And light never reaches it. In that hour when love is revisited And burst-blood runs its mindless course. In that hour I dread so much, It's in that hour I'm loving you again.
One day out. Still crying to sleep, All because I'm missing you, And your gaze. I'm entranced by you. My mind whirls about your face, And you're not even around. The smallest thing that reminds me of you, Triggers the tear ducts to fill. It hurts to look at the pictures, Of us. Because I know that I won't see you for awhile. Too long, if you ask me. Summer has come, And I'm still waiting for it to pass. Can't last, I'm sure, much longer. I'm missing you. I'm missing me. Because you hold my heart and soul in your palm. Take care of it, For I am missing you, And will need to see you soon.
were it was hollowed within the crumpled tissue paper thrown onto the filth drowned on truth
If I forget, Remind me of your name As it must have slipped away. If I forget, Show me a photo of my face As it surely has changed. If I forget, Take my hand back to that place For I've certainly lost my way. If I forget, Breathe a gentle breath in my ear If will calm my fear and rekindle the flame. If I forget, Bring the heart straps That held me to you like glue. And if I forget, Carry the memory of us It is lost but a treasure on a raft on the waves... TRS, 09/13/08
Dark the shadow, moving among us as a thief, Deftly slipping its thin, spiny fingers Deep into those hearts not yet strong Tugging almost effortlessly at the soul within That knows not, the light, the bright salvation. For only a small step towards the shining star Would summon the angels to battle, Fierce, cunning, strong, they fly to their call. But, alas, though a small step, a deep, endless chasm For one so lost, so tortured...so alone. The others watch yet do nothing to stop The growing vastness of nothing, Suckling all life, all hope from where it feeds So simply, with hardly a protest or fight, not even a whimper; Only abandon and sadness, regret and loss. Yet in the distance a soft and gentle song trumpets in the wind, Calling back the lost and weary souls forgotten, Calling them all back, aching for their pains and sorrows, Offering a choice if only they would hear. Closer and brighter, chasing shadow back into the night. The endless battle surely bringing victory to one Yet, we watch and do nothing, and the angels cry out Their frustrations and despair, and with prayers that man will take That step of faith, opening their hearts as all who hunger for the light, May find salvation and end the nothingness that grows.
M y heart was not perpaird for this! Y ou caught me so off gaurd. H ow could you leave my life, like there was never any love at all. E very time I remember you, the pain contenues. A fter all we have been through, you departed. R ed roses you gave me, said you loved me. T onight I cry for you. W hat you have done for me, has opened my eyes. I will never forget this for it has been my life lesson. L ook at me. L ook at me, you have made me. G od forbid this, but it is what is now. O h how I want you back. O ne day I might forgive you. N ever will I stop loveing you.
No words describe the pain As tears fall you know, This is only the beginning! True heartbreak lies ahead Tears roll endlessly, A grown man on his knees Broken by despair. That sad reality that your not good enough A question you already answered! Looking back I regret… I regret that first look when your eyes met mine… You had my heart more then you could ever know! As rage brews inside, still I have no hate for you, But only for myself! Knowing I couldn't be what you needed… I couldn't fill that role! So here I sit alone As tears roll down my check, I have no words to describe the pain!
I thought that you… Would be the one that would be different But I've come to see… That you're no different from the rest I see that once again I made the same mistake And I will continue until I finally see the truth! Why must you take my heart And use it, abuse it, to your liking? Must you grind it up into tiny pieces? However, I'm tired of being your Toy used merely for your pleasure Because I now see right through you So leave me be darling As you may know… I will not shed a single tear for you Just go away… For all you do now is plague my mind I should've known that you didn't ever love me Instead, you just merely led me along My love for you still remains But what is the use if all you do Is just use it like an object? If you never loved me in the first place Then you shouldn't have pulled me by a leash For I'm not an animal that you can control! Why must you lie? Why did you lie? Why lie to me and say you love me? I have to know I must know I got to know why I… Was tricked again! The darkness is peoples' hearts… Seem to get even darker… Is there no way to change it…? Tell me why, I have to know… Why must you take my heart And use it, abuse it, to your liking? Must you grind it up into tiny pieces? However, I'm tired of being your Toy used merely for your pleasure Because I now see right through you So leave me be darling My love for you still remains But what is the use if all you do Is just use it like an object? If you never loved me in the first place Then you shouldn't have pulled me by a leash For I'm not an animal that you can control! Why must you lie? Why did you lie? Why lie to me and say you love me? I now know I now know I now know that you… Never really loved me!
As long as various people run various nations There will forever be war What the world needs is one leader A common man who believes in the working class As well as the Lord Instead of one Nation under God Lets make it one World under God And just let each individual decide what he or she wishes to call that God So I here by nominate our dear friend Vince Suzadail Jr. The first candidate of the new world order He seems to have the best Political views I've heard And I think he alone could do a much better job Than all the leaders of all the nations are doing At least I'm certain he couldn't do any worse And that way all the super intelligent people devising ways Of destroying our world Could find something more constructive to spend their time on Like raising a crop or milking a cow Saving a child or helping elderly with their needs There are plenty of folk who need a hand Lets all start offering them ours instead of cutting theirs off I'm just a simple man My actual world is very small My family, friends and neighbors I love you all and hope you know I'll do anything for you I can There is no malevolence left in me I know how to make and use a shank, zip gun or small explosive But I've learned not to For I've learned to think with my heart and soul They do a much better job than my mind I just wish the great minds of the world Were smart enough To figure out what I have And learn to love with all of their hearts
I can't believe you saw my picture Right away you send me a letter Said the cuties things to me Said i was the only one We made plans to finally meet You could't wait for just a bit You saw me for the first time Said nothing but good-buh What was it that i did wrong? Was i something else? Was i ugly? What was it? Im still left with this blank Inside my mind
As I see you take your last breath I cry and scream in agony For I have lost my best friend and The only man that ever truly loved me You knew all my secrets You knew all my faults And loved me in spite of them Now I feel bitter regret Because I have missed so Much time with you And now it is too late I have lost you forever You were the only one Who was ever true to me You would have ripped Out your heart if I needed it Though abuse and betrayal Found me because of you I always knew how much That you loved me Despite the many faces That you have encountered During your lifetime I was the only woman That you ever loved Though I was full of Many imperfections You saw me as The perfect woman In every way The devotion you have Shown me surpasses That of all of the romantic Tales that have ever been told Now all I can do is Cherish your memory Like I should have done When you were alive Your passing does not Only mean the ending Of your earthly existence It is the death to the Beating of my heart For I cannot live Without my soul mate
I had dreams, sometimes About him always about glass streams I used to love his company Or the promise of it, In my dreams. Then my eyelids spread apart And they stroked blissful clouds As he made me mumble and Sigh through my words And blow bubbles of nonsense into the dense air While lying in his arms On his chest In his mother's bed Cradling my heart Caressing my body With his hand between my thighs Rubbing, exploring, sinfully Touching me And the throat filling silence And the sound of his mouth And the expulsion of breath And the symphony in his chest And my love echoing through my body With his hand between my thighs And the electricity in my fingernails And my limp, clenched, guilty, pleasure bond body Anticipating The exploration of his hand Between my thighs Before then Before we were there, or I was there, or he was there Holding me Closer, His hand rhythmically Slithering up my thigh Allowing me to taste the darkened fruit of paradise On his mother's bed (and my wonder if I was dreaming) no before then I can only remember Innocence.
Wish it wasn't so cold around here Wish I could stand up sometimes Wish I had somewhere to go Drowning myself to sleep with emo music Wish you were near me Wish I knew who you are Wish I could see your eyes for a while Dreaming in black and white every night The sun goes down again End of the act, see you idiots tommorrow Hide in the darkness Warm, comfy shelter The day is gone again Another time I can't be broken I pull the strings here, in black and white Curl up and cry for tonight The sun goes down again And you emerge from its ashes Look at me now, in black and white 'cause colors hurt Wish I could look at the sun Without my eyes burning up Wish you were here Without your hands cutting mine But I just sleep every night Dreaming in black and white...
Falling deep, Hard and strong. Can't stop from falling, In love with your gaze, And I won't realize it, Until I'm hit hard in the face, A horrible reminder of this morbid place. Can't stop time, And can't turn it back, Can't change your place, In a world made of class. My heart shatters, Like glass, When you aren't around, And yet you don't notice, Until the day, I'm gone for good. Invisible, Not there for you to admire. And now you're the one falling, And falling, Until you're hit in the face, And realize you've made your biggest, Mistake.
Must be so far 'Cause I can't see the end Here's hoping Here's to all who never cared I said I'd serve you until the end Not so hard to understand But you have killed the moment Left me here for dead Coming too fast 'Cause I can see the end Here's hoping You take time forget I said I'd serve you until the end Not so hard to understand But you have killed the moment Left me here for dead Coming too late 'Cause I have passed the end Here's hoping You let go of all regrets In comes the tide To wash your life away Here's hoping That you're on solid ground
She is not real On some bottle I broke the seal Imbibed all it's contents And now I'm pouring all my sentiments Out onto the sidewalk Can't hardly walk The pavement is cool Refreshing to this fool I yell out her name This is not Yatzee a game I'm crawling and mumbling As I try to stand; I'm tumbling I can't make heads or tails Of this pain sharp as nails In the depths of my heart I'm aching and falling apart These feelings are worse Than being trampled by a horse Is it obsession or love? I plead to the heavens above To send her back to me To return things to how they used to be But that won't happen I can't wipe it all away with a napkin But maybe I know a way To make it through the next day I'll just simply tell myself a lie Why I didn't get to say goodbye This truth I will never reveal She was not real...
disappeared with the moment, Regrets, Echoes, Confusion, Lust, all sandwiched on white leaves with blue veins coated with brownish crust. i have my name on it, lost, i cannot stand, dizzy, hoping it escapes a cognoscenti hand. The rythms, The rhymes, The stanzas, The lines I cannot save money to buy, 'cos they came like from the sky. sighs and tears soaked by the time. I'm a forfeit mind... but I wrote those lines... blue, black, green and red, on white pages spread. Awakening, I buried the 'i' now awaiting the fumes of the sediment to bring I back to life.
Frustrated Hurt Confused Unsure Unable to see who I am Unable to see you for what you are What you've become Yet I love you But the longer I stay The longer my love for myself fades away I have sacrificed Compromised Went against my morals My principles All for a love that was never really mine I have been battered Bruised Scarred by the same lips that use to say the sweetest words The words that use to play in my ears like a soft symphony You can't even see how much you've changed Back to who you always were The man you always denied to be How naïve of me to trust In you In us The mask that you use to hide your true identity Has disappeared Leaving you exposed For all eyes to see What a Liar Swindler Jerk You really are It's as if I am seeing you for the first time As satisfied as I should be for finding this out now Before I was in deeper I am not satisfied I am heartbroken Distraught I can't believe I fell for the illusion Instead of for the reality I can't believe my chance for a happily ever after Was only a mirage I created in my mind And I can't believe I allowed you to hurt me so deeply I can't believe this broken girl in the mirror ...is me
Hacksaw… Obliteration within; Scream the shame--- Make it a nightmare: Walking zombie, Destroy imagination… Annihilated. Russell Sivey Entrant into Debbie Guzzi's "Something Different" contest
The signs came early enough for us to know, that we didn't have much time before you would go. You had to quit your job and move somewhere new, leaving all those memories behind for us to review. We knew the upcoming months would be tough, trying to make the best of every moment, but still not enough. The next few months for you were somewhat a blast, going to Tennessee with your daughters, both hoping it would last. When you got back, you became sicker and sicker, the doctors said that the cancer started getting thicker and thicker. We all knew the end would come soon, how long it would be, no one knew. Every moment we could, we spent with you, Now I sit and realize how the time just flew. As the end came near we threw you a surprise, I'll never forget the look in your eyes. We threw a surprise party just for you, inviting all the people that you knew. The end would soon come later that night, as you passed away and began your heavenly flight. Mom and Dad said that you had a blast, those last few moments, filling the night with plenty of laughs. As you recalled old memories of yours from the past, with everyone there hoping that time would last. As I sat through the funeral, and I shed a single tear, I would never forget the times you and I shared here. Now that I know you are gone, to live in heaven eternally long, I have come to say that I will always love you Grandma, and I will never forget you, goodbye "Nanaw".
A hatred toward myself a longing for the feeling of the cold hearted no emotion no cares no heartbreak the unbelievable becomes real a rejection burning so deep! another night of these deadly thoughts realizing the sad truth, nothing I do can ever be enough the cliché stands true… Nice Guys finish last!
A figure in darkness Cradleing a small package Trots up the stony ridge of stairs In the night clouds cover the horizon No stars can be seen from the gloomy street A single lantern is lit and the only light A woman with the hood drawn above her head Lays a child upon the doorstep of a lonely family She touches her fingers to her mouth Then to the child's forehead A tear filled with happy memories Lands upon the baby's hand With one last look The woman disappears into darkness As swiftly as she appeared And the baby gave a cry of sadness Then all became silent
Is death the end to our suffering Or the cessation of our existence? Is death a new journey for our soul? Or is death our final eternal punishment? Or do our souls get to rest peacefully After a life of trials and tribulations? Should we cry or rejoice when Death stares us in the face? What is death to us? An end to our sorrow To our pain To our physical imperfections To our illnesses To the sins that torment us Should we fear this unknown phenomena? Or should we embrace it? Maybe in death we find the truth That escaped us during our lives. Maybe in death we can finally find freedom To roam in a mystic realm of our own creation
Thy heart go's out, out to thee. For thy will still be here, even when thou is not for me. I want thee to know, That thine will loveist thou with all thy heart and soul. Thy heart go's out to thee.
In case you were wondering... I'm not okay...But I say I am. You just don't know it. And you sure can't see it. Cause on the outside, I'm fine. But on the inside...I'm bleeding. I fake a smile, I fake a laugh. Just so you can't figure me out. In case you were wondering... I'm not okay...But I say I am. But what you don't know can't hurt you right? I'm in pain, I have breakdowns, I cry myself to sleep at night. But you don't know that. So you think I'm fine. See how this all works? Your not worried, your not hurt. But I am. In case you were wondering... I'm not okay...But I say I am. Sometimes I wish I could just tell you how I feel. Maybe then you would really understand. Maybe then you would be smart enogh to know that when I say "I'm fine...Really." You'll ask me over and over until I tell you the truth. But I can't tell you how I feel. So you think I'm okay. You think I'm happy. Well I got news for you. In case you were wondering... I'M NOT.
I'm fresh out of lies My eyes are all out of cries My heart can't take any more pain And this feeling is driving me insane I wish things didn't turn out this way I wish I was the height of your day Can't believe it turned out this bad Why am I the reason for your sad? I wish I could erase our memories But I hope you will always remember me Things got bad and went down the hole Now the pain we feel is much to cruel Amazing how things can change Now nothing could ease the pain So what's left when you're lost and alone? That still remains unknown…
I went to see your mom today, and invited me in She offered me a glass of tea, I asked her how she's been She said she'd tried her hardest to raise you her very best I said it wasn't her fault taht you've been layed to rest Her eyes swelled up with tears, so I put my arms around her I told her it would be okay, that God would be with you She told me that she cries all night, and wants to be there too I told her I cried too, everytime I think of you That all the seconds of everyday are filled with clouds of blue I told her that I miss you and loved you very much I miss the way we use to talk, now you're too far to touch I watched their every move when they layed you in the ground I wanted to go with you, it's not the same, you're not around I know that you're in Heaven now, watching down here from above So until the day we meet again, I'm sending you my love
I am elevated to high most unseen the view of the heavens peaceful and serene however I am but a man flawed in many ways my soul battered bruised and frayed I do but seek shelter from the heat of my own damnation the moisture building up inside me like condensation every waking moment is a mix of pain and pleasure the little complexities of life that we once liken to treasure all of me is all that is left, and is all that I despise I see but no wisdom in my own eyes I see no light hovering above my head just the moist dank dark, the horror and dread my spoils have left nothing but traces of dew I run over to what's left to savor all that's left what little few I am but again victim to my own demise and damnation a fool to drown in his own midnight condensation
She so delicate of visage Veiled in obscurity Intangible appearances Faceted in flowing black mists Eyes buffering the vagueness lit Piercing through shadow Contained within Turbulent metaphors of dusk Tempting destiny uncontrolled Splashing hot crimson Upon the life sparked cinders Empathizing too late
Its like a new start But at the same time, Im at the finish line Its like I've gained something But at the same time, I've lossed I feel empty But yet im full Im sad inside And at the same time Im happy I gave So that i could get What i gaveup wasnt alot but it has a hold on me What i got makes what I had seem..seem...unworthy Its like I've accomplished something But it wasnt enough I left the old life I've moved on So why am I crying Why doesnt this feel right I dont wanna go back but I dont wanna stay I've gained so much But at the same time I've lost a huge amout I'm confused and im lost Im cold yet Im hot Im hungry yet im full I dont know if i should make a left or a right I dont know if im wrong or right It's a new start But im standing at he finish line...
I don't know why you insist on loving me Because you won't receive it back fully I'm not so used to the subject A part of my heart is saying, "I don't love you!" You can't sleep at night because you're worried About me... But let me say that I'm very important You wont leave me alone, you're in my way And I cannot have that Its fine that we're friends but we... Cannot go any further than that But you'll have a nice life You'll find someone to be in your life Because I am nothing but trouble... However you insist that love is stonger But tell me why people get hurt everyday It is because of this so-called-thing love That's hurting everyone, me, and you Just because I choose not to love you In that way... Doesn't mean that I don't... Think of you every now and then You'll have a nice life You'll find someone to be in your life Becase I am nothing but trouble... I don't know why you insist on loving me Because you won't receive it back fully I'm not so used to the subject A part of my heart is saying, "I don't love you!" I don't know why you insist on loving me Because you wont receieve it back fully I'm not so used to the subject So just drop it please However you insist that love is stronger It maybe in a fantasy world However we live in reality And a part of my heart is saying, "I don't love you!"
A yearling asleep When its mother arrived She knew it was time A green meadow, the best place It was time to say farewell to her fawn For he was a young growing buck She wished him good luck He would miss being A small spotted fawn Who Waits patiently for mother While gnawing the grass Oh, he would dearly Miss those wonderfully Glorious days
Death awaits me on the corner so be quick with your condemnation and I shall consider tomorrow's charges tangled with today's conviction and claim my part of just accusation and no more.
Rancid air fills the lungs Causing blisters on the tongue My mouth is burning from speaking All injustices Cancerous ways of thinking Do they see what the world has become? The Heavens are thick with money No longer the symbol of wealth itself Canopies of greed Descend upon me Pay them the planet A grain of sand is worth More then a million dollars The scent of a lotus White and innocent Cost more then The car in the garage No longer will children be able to dream of Painted sunsets over violet mountains Sunrises of brilliant orange One cannot dream of what is only seen in pictures There is damage that even tears may not wash away I try to scoop up Earth with a shovel and hide it From hungry pockets I try, I'm trying, I've tried Alone Save my world Baby heal My land Please.
I am a lot of things I am a mother I am a child I am a sister I am a friend I am someones lover I am unfortunately someones wife I am always afraid of doing the wrong thing and of making mistakes I feel sooo much at one time I feel loss I feel love I feel a burning hatred that runs sooo deep I feel confusion of where I am going and what I am doing I feel lost and without any understanding I am who I am and what I am I know I am not perfect and neither is anyone else I am tired of being judged by my past I made my mistakes don't want them thrown in my face If I had not made those mistakes I would not be who I am Take me or leave me I am who I am and make no more apologies Love me, hate me I don't care anymore I am tired of being nice and keeping my mouth shut I am tired of not being allowed to be me I am not an easy woman to love I am complex and simple ALL at once I want love and need love but will live without it if I have to Take your best shot because I am.......ME!
Streaking skyward the tracers rip Into hanging soldiers Falling about into mayhem Pulsing through blood-filled ears Hearing comrades scream Understanding nothing This is the war I found… Hatred filled hardened hunter Into smashed building Homes pulverized rubble Strewn about the decaying mass The scorched metal burning Bodies of the fallen men The miasma of war I forever inhale… Tigers rolling through billowed flame Firing upon burnt battlefield blindly Retreating in terror I leave the voices Calling as I my boots tamp by arms Reaching for safety I couldn't render Brothers abandoned in the Arnhem snow These are the ghosts of war who haunt me…. Battle's percussion on the horizon distant I fade through the fields upon the Rhein Farmhouses glow a midnight path Walking to the beat of gun fire echoes Off the walls of a shelter a little boy sits Unafraid of the man feeding him chocolate In the crater of a bomb… This flash of hope my salvation from war.
What do you do with someone who has a black heart? One so black, that no light can shine through it What would you do to try to get away? A potential killer, locked away on the inside Now seems to be emerging and nothing can stop it How do you plan on keeping, the devil inside? You wanted nothing nice of me Instead, you preferred…that I show you The evil trapped in my heart… Why does everyone want to… See how far they can go with me? I wanna know So can you please tell me? Why doesn't anyone appreciate… The fact that I try to remain sane? I wanna know So, tell me… I don't fight much anymore like I used to Just because the sight of blood excites me I would fight to the death, if I could… I've nearly killed a few of my friends when in rage And a few times, little children as well But I'm afraid of what I can do That is why, I became an outcast… Just to prevent such a thing…from happening again Now why did you bring it out again? Why does everyone want to… See the evil, the demon in my heart? I wanna know So, you better tell me Why do you act like the rest of them? Did you want to see me insane? I wanna know Do you wanna die? Everyone…doesn't deserve To be treated with kindness…nor respect For that matter, so why try? Why does everyone want to… Be caught up in the darkness? I wanna know And you better tell me I won't waste my time with you all To me it seems that you want to go to hell. I wanna know Do you plan on joining me?
This ends right now. Confided in me then threw it all away There can be no love left within me Angerfeardisappointmentdespair But you've lost it all now - I've given up on you. He's got you doing I don't know what And the rumours are rumours but the rumours are true And if I saw him I swear I'd smash his face in. Could do with another outlet after all These stabbing shrieks inside my chest Scraping at my flesh and bone Won't let them penetrate me See her; who is she? Wonder if you know her She's everything you pretended to be Emotionless beneath that metal Trusting no-one still being betrayed Who are they in the frame with her? These strangers who casually call themselves friends You're so stupid They couldn't care less Watch you stagger and fuel the habits they helped you start Mindless idiot. She's going to die and she's taking you with her Don'tpiercethatdon'tsmokethatdon'ttakethat What more can I do when you block me out? Sleep around black out come to me for comfort Crazy little girl, could slash you and let all the bad rush out But then of course we'd have nothing left And it grieves me that it's come to this Can't stand it anymore; you're on your own you've got a choice you'll make the wrong decision I can't be there to guide you Confided in you then threw it all away Can't keep these lame promises and I know I said I'd always be there But I was there for you and I'm talking to myself 'cause you're dead on the inside And it's spreading fast. Not one redeeming feature Could rip you apart wouldn't harm you for the world Save you from it all leave you there for them to get you And they won't find my girl, person worth protecting Her and you'll be there instead already gone already dead You all shall scream Won't turn my head And I'll remember you today For what you used to be Days that seem too far away You're ugly now in every way.
Tomorrow is another day, a fresh start. You manipulated your way and stole my heart! I try to focus on self, but I'm seriously failing. You took my emotional wealth, and now my mind is sailing. Drifting along, needing an answer as to "why?" You would rewrite my song, look me in the eye and lie! Tomorrow is another day, a new beginning. I kneel and pray for all this sinning. You dragged me down to the lowest point in my life. Take off that crown you're no longer my wife. I will carry on and refuse to look back. I'd rather be alone, I'm serious as a heart attack! Hearts don't break they just tend to bend. I took all I could take now I'm gone with the wind!!!! 03/10
We lay side by side in the summer grass, I reached for the gingerbread man kit And lifted out a slightly crumbled biscuit, Taking the tube, I iced a shaky smile onto its face, Added big, hopeful chocolate drop eyes And wrote 'I love you' down its front, Then I handed it to her and said, "This is me, take care of her," And she grinned and bit off its head.
time and distance unwind unmindful of a ticking clock as commitment tumbles through constant years with ne'er a thought that there exists another dimension where all possibilities exist
the soul of the child is forever scarred with hurts from years ago. The soul of this child knows not what inner peace feels like. The soul of a hurt child wants the love of a mother who is only a dream in her heart. The soul of any child deserves nothing less than a lifetime of hugs. The soul of the child I once was would rather close her eyes forever than continue waiting for someone to be my mother.
**********************To Beautiful... Forever on my mind************************** I awake to such pleasantry her beautiful face once more I get dressed, grab my keys and head for the front door I try to think of anything to relieve my mind of her I can't get anything done my mind is slightly blurred she has me twisted it's not like me, sprung, bewitched I'm slowly dropping to my knees For twenty two years been friends For eighteen months been lovers I care for her most there is no-one else above her ****************************** My pager vibrates than blares out loud what a hellacious sound I recognize the number her mother is calling me is it a special occasion? because for nothing do we agree. She answers with a sniffle mumbling incoherently Beautiful has been shot in a convenience store robbery My blood drained quickly, face turned casper white. My legs turned to Jell-O now i've lost my sight I used whatever strength I had whatever I could muster I had to reach the hospital to tell her that I love her. Be there when she needs me most be strong and show no pain. Hold back my tears, going against my grain. By the time I reached her bedside able to hold her hand. The doctor said "We've lost her" " We've done everything we can.." The Red-Line Sounds....................................................................................................... ..........:JP)...................
Moments come and go, But special moments come again, When the thoughts of you with me Seem they never have an end; As a touch brings back sensation And a song triggers emotion, A smell brings back the memories As a taste triggers the notion That we'll always be together; What we shared will never end, And I know that you're right there When special moments come again.
you tell me i am precious to you. i am not your currency. you tell me the circumstances are beyond our control. but i control everything, every breath, every word that leaks from my mouth. you made me this way, shaped me from wax, using knives and tears to make scars in my form. you tell me you have loved me, forever, and until your dying day. these words slither from your tongue. you could never have loved me, its not something thats easy to do. you dont care what path my life takes, you dont know what i have been forced into. you dont want love, you want control. you don't want a daughter, you want a follower. i have accepted that i have no mother, that i was created by life's sick fantasy. i wanted to love you, when there was still a chance. so don't lie to me anymore, don't tell me that it doesnt have to be this way. it does. dont thank god for me. there is no god. and i am just a curse, because i hurt you. you preach that you have room for me in your heart, that you think of me everyday. and i think of you, in the morning when i wake, and in the night when i rest my head. nothing can ever be easy, or understandable. in my heart, there are only cracks and cobwebs where you might have been before. it throbs and convulses, refusing love. i couldnt love anyone, not if i tried. not if i wanted.
As she falls she thinks She thinks of what she did to make this happen She was not perfect in his eyes She is no longer pure He expected her to be good She was supposed to guide those on the wrong path And guard those innocent few She was to be a role model But she has fallen now She can no longer be that She is not innocent anymore She has been treated like a disobedient child He has disowned her like a pregnant daughter He refuses to forgive her She was supposed to be perfect She was supposed to remain untouched for eternity The one everyone wanted but couldn't have But that didn't happen And she has been tossed aside Tossed aside like ugly clothes She let someone touch her And for that she can never return She thinks he has overreacted She doesn't see what she did as wrong She believes it was destined to happen But he sees it has the worst possible thing she could do He disowned her for one mistake But she hopes he will let her come back Maybe one day he will welcome her home But for now he won't She imagines her new life She thinks falling will be the hardest thing Maybe one day she will rise again Being a fallen angel was never her goal But that is what she is And until he forgives her That is what she will remain
Momma you always said to me, "babe when I'm not there and you'er scared, look up at the moon and I'll be there."
It starts with little white lies Ever hungry, deception feeds on itself A monster with a grip that won't let go Webs become impossible to untangle Words that never see the light of truth Bound with the silken thread of deceit
If I could, I would wrap you up tightly in the softest down blankie and rock your broken heart until you felt safely protected and strong enough to open your eyes and know the tears that soak your world come from God to water tender shoots pushing up through despair and confusion to seek the light that softly glows in your heart and grows a tiny bit brighter minute by hour until there at the corner of your lips a slight tug works so desperately to grow into a ~ Blossom. Love you, my fragile friend.
Shining in hygienic walls A flawlessness hollow Stiff and gray On metal tables Rested upon unkempt hair Recollections merge Into torpid puddles That exquisite beauty Now shattered Engulfed entirely By conclusions of separation I leave with you A vinyl sack damp and thick Sealed shut Superfluously removed
Many years ago my dear mother left me and went to be with Jesus. My heart wept for her, that sad day in June, my life was not the same anymore. As anyone who has ever lost someone close to them knows the feeling. Mother was the comfort of my heart everyday of my life. She taught me about God and how to love everyone. She told me to never lie, telling the truth was always the best thing to do. To treat others fair and kind, to always say thank you and please. She taught me to put others first and my self last. Mother taught me all of these things, by doing them her self. Mother I have not always done those things, but I know that I should do them. Loving you always waiting till that day when I will put my arms around your and say thank you my loving dear mother. wrote 9-2-08
There is a force outside this walls trying to penetrate the security. Things kept crashing round us. In love you were sheltered, but now you color it hostility. Your embracing the things that take you away from us, But you color them saviors. We were encircled with words Of loving-kindness as a support, But you now color it bondage and chains. With what vision do you Contort the foundation, Of our very make up? We must see through different eyes.
Hidden spirits motherland, destructions chosen horror. Decayed barren grounds, ravaged territories dilapidation. Debris leftover magnetic fields, crawls nuclear poisons contamination. Ruins graphics stand strongly obscure.
It is truly yours Belonging to both This single point Examine and ponder it Established once Polished complete By agony pleasured Ruminate and reflect Cite and believe it In it's finality Of defined setting Intimate and echo it Holding on Here at the end of all What was there to think about?
First thing on my mind Seems to be you Yet now it's negative Not as positive Even though we shared Many good times There were times Where the broken heart would be mine Memories of you I try to forget It seems to affect me everyday Yet those memories I also cherish I don't know what to do! All those memories That I have of you Are pleasant yet painful I love you? or do I hate you? I don't know anymore... I know I said I needed you I kept you in my mind To keep me going But now I'm just fine I don't need you anymore Because you loving someone else And playing me is wrong All those memories I smile, cry, get sad, even mad Now I'm questioning If my friends were right all along! All these thoughts I have of you Are loving yet hateful What should I do? Can you please tell me!? I don't know what to feel... anymore... All of those memories... I have are hurting me inside Why would you do something like this? Now I'm confused... I don't know what to do! All these memories I have of you Are pleasant yet painful I love you? or do I hate you? I don't know anymore All these thoughts I have of you Are loving yet hateful What should I do? Can you please tell me!? I don't know what to feel... anymore... I don't know if I love you... anymore...
Once upon a time there was Love Love was a fickle thing blind at times, but true sometimes she fell in sometimes she fell out but once ago she was mine somewhere in time i loved her back and she loved me underneath the sycammore tree and Love ran away out into the world out into the cold somewhere in time she never came back to me she found someone else someone better in her heart i had played my part so i am here and she is there somewhere over there out beyond the starry sea away from me i wonder if she remembers when the time back then i hope so before i go that she remembers me
A dad he was to my man, lost in a world of abuse. Selling all he had in life, to fund his addictions. Digging flesh from bone, stabbing bugs crawling wild. Demons appear in torment, beaconing him deeper. A knife into the thigh, sent him sickly out. Hospital tests for all, not knowing the truth. Infections settle silently, staff reared its ugly head. Confined in solitary moments, being alone and scared. Stitches close the injury, sickness embeds his soul. Taunting images haunt him, through every corned space. Eyes cloud with blurred vision, surgery required suddenly quick. Sight saved from blindness, doctors breathe with a sigh. Something else has happened, immune system has shut down. Disease rested in his marrow, the fight fire life has begun. Myloid Dysplastics Disease, fogs his body hard and cold. Respirators knocking loudly, asleep he has no choice. A gasp of air was his final, machines took over from there. The last time we would see him, full of any kind of life of his own. Two weeks has gone by, no change for the better. Septic shock attacks kidneys, we all seen him enter heaven. It was a total all together, from the time he stabbed his leg. Four months from that day, his end would be forever...
I am unable to comprehend How your physical remnants were found With a stately essence of womanhood A mother's end.
She fought daily with the agony. never knew when it would strike. It affected all corners of her world waking, sleeping, laughing, and crying. Early one morn, she lost the battle. Through the night she had struggled, to rid the ache in her head. She tried them all. One here and one there, still it persisted, another, then, another. She had forgotten the total. The compounds crescendoed and released an avalanche of effects. Breathing crawled, heart decelerated and mentation retarded. Then all stopped. It was an accidental overdose. Just a girl trying to ... stop the pain.
You came in packages wrapped in black and white checkered abstract ribbon knotted much too tight. In spaces between all and nothing lies my patient heart.
Old Death is a scar, an empty eye socket, a lost limb. It has been grieved and we leave it alone most of the time except on long drives or sleepless nights. New Death is a police siren behind you, a baby crying for you in the night in a house on fire. New Death is bright red. Old Death is brown. We can pick it up and put it down. New Death picks us up and puts us down when it wants to. New Death is a mugger in an alley on your way home. Leather jacket, whiskey breath, fear smell, switch blade at your throat. That's New Death. It mugs you and steals your life for years or forever. Old Death is a tight uniform you wore, you try it on once in a while. You were drafted in the Regiment of Pain. It doesn't fit, you don't wear it but you will never be the same again. You have your memories at that private war with Death. You are a veteran now. But the Private Pain mellows into General Acceptance and the poignancy turns to peace and all New Death will lose it's sting with time and God's help forever.
I wish I could give you my love, but I can't… You may go and misuse it again… I used to think that every time you glared, you were mad at me But now I've come to see that you weren't mad, instead you hated me I should've known that you did, because after a while you changed You don't want to hug, kiss, or even look at my face I wish I could give you my love but I can't You had to change suddenly How am I supposed to continue to love you? I wish I could give you my love but I can't You may go and misuse it again But not I'm stronger and I don't…need you anymore! All those fond memories we had meant something to me But the question is, are those memories false or real? Why did you have to lie? Why did you lead me astray? Either way you shattered my heart I wish I could give you my love, but I can't You had to throw it to the wayside Now that it's lost, how are you going to find it? I wish I could give you my love but I can't It's like the breeze that blows in the night And it's blowing away quickly…how are you going to get it back now? Where is your heart…? Why is it longing…? Longing for my return… I have no reason to even look at you… I wish I could give you my love but I can't You had to throw it to the wayside Now you want what's lost to be returned to you Forget it now, it's gone forever You will never get it back from me Go find someone else to torment Because I'm gone forever on!
Call to me from stillborn silence insistent intrusion upon my sanctuary of absent black sensory void of hateful peace
The world continues its rotation with or without your attendance. It has been so since the earth cooled and mountains and seas became. Give it up and check out – to the closet corner, if you please. Dark and soundless singularly personal. Sit with shoes of worn tread left upon the path of overuse, the scent of lessons learned and willfully ignored. Feel silky seams sewn with promise brush your cheek, now frayed and undone. Pull your knees to your chest and rest your chin upon the death of desire for it all. Let your heart heal. Then unlock the door and savor the scars.
It is the one I want, that my heart does haunt. Even though I can not have, the one I hold near and dear, they always make me laugh. They do not spurn me; all they do is make me feel free. Though I know who I want, they always seem to try to taunt. I can not have them this I know, I still seem to love them from head to toe. It is for some time, my love I try to hide. But now my obsession grows so strong, I do not know if my heart can hold out for long. So some how my heart I must break, or something else my love and heart must take. For I know them very well, I wish they would at least, make my heart hurt like hell. Because they can not return my love, I will try to pray for help from above. I truly care for them, so I can not go to take, them away from who they date, so now I put my whole self at stake. Even though my love they won't return, I really wish then my heart would burn. I really fear that some time soon, I will be emotionally ruined, and that to be my doom.
Oh little quipster Come dance for me Embrace upon me Wit and humor Hypnotize me With alluring charm Unbreakable Fill your performance With moments of regret Whipped and wrenched Upon my spirit Do me this favor One final time And I shall forget Your debt to me
Cut my veins Drink my filth Bite me Corrupt me Take me away Make me whole You are Satan's Minion I am your Eternal Damnation Give me life, give me need Cut my wrist and make me bleed Through these veins dead blood flows The sins of the heart breed jealous fiends, and dark desires. Burning, bleeding wounds caused from blood lust and loneliness Are the harbingers of sins of the heart. Let me die of broken spirit & destitute heart. Let me die. Just let me die. Blood is dripping to the floor Feels much better, I hurt no more I'm numb inside and feel no pain One of these days I'll empty my veins Kill me For my life Is meaningless
Don't you dare think of leaving me with the mess of you to unknow the heart of you to unlearn the soul of you to untie the strings of us to attempt to defy the laws of nature
Sometimes you feel trapped when you are bound to someone else You feel like breaking out but you simply cant you see... Everyone feels like that from time to time so its natural But that is the problem that we all face in life... We don't wanna hurt each other But it just gets so difficult We wish to have everything we want But reality is harsh No matter...how hard we try All we can do is hurt our loved ones "I love you" is basically an empty phrase Because all we do is cheat and sin Honey... Thought we have a conscience, we seem to go against it all the time What does that say about everyone in general...? Everyone is eveil on the inside though we try to deny it But we can also do good if we would only try it... We simply don't care about anyone else Though we lie and say we do We only are evil and selfish But we cannot control it No matter...how hard we try All we can do is cause harm Why can't we all simply change as a whole? Because we all share a common sin Honey... We go so far low as to hurt one another Just to satisfy our wants We are all really selfish But we can't help it We don't wanna hurt each other But it just gets so difficult We hurt each other to get what we want Without thinking the plan through No matter...how hard we try All we can do is cause harm Why can't we all simply change as a whole? Because we all share a common sin Honey...
A brisk ride with a little known uncle, to a gathering of loved ones, reunited, quickly turns to a journey of hell. Torn away from her home, she is subjected to a horrifying world of depravity and terrorism. On a country backroad, with no one to witness, her chastity is torn away, along with ripped clothing and flesh. Struggling for freedom, fighting for breath, she strains against their hands. They violate her tiny body with their own. She screams and cries out for "Momma." The tears flood her tiny eyes. With no one to save her, this nightmare is real. Each movement brings forth more pain, seeping to her very core. She endures the ghastly assault from the demented couple, she does survive. Back on the road, with drugs prevailing the truck comes to a violent stop. She runs to her earthbound savior with wings of denim and an old red truck. He rescues what is left of her angelic being, kept safe until the enforcers present. She now battles, not for her life, but her mind. The outer scars will fade with time, but his face and voice will haunt her and live in her nightmares from now on.
As I sit and look at my old pictures and photographs, My mind begins to wonder of the old good times and pasts... Not a care in the world, Not a responsibility at all. I was just a kid living a dream, Sitting at home watching T.V. and eating ice cream. My parents were still together, I never realized the pain I would eventually suffer. I was able to go out and play anytime I wanted, I just wish now that I wouldn't have taken the time for granted. I could ask my dad to do anything with me at that time, Play basketball, catch, or just spend some time... As I take a break from recalling my old days, I realize that there was a price to pay. Those days were good and I miss them dearly, But I never knew that they would be so costly. I didn't know it would take the relationship with my dad, To live a good childhood with nothing ever going bad. I never knew that it would take years of moving around, To find a good neighborhood to settle down. Eventually though, we found our own space, And our lives started falling back into place... I remember being so careless and free, How my life was full of laughter and glee. I had fun going to school, I used to think that it was so cool. Me and my friends got along all the time, I even got along with my brother just fine... Now I sit and realize, That was then and this is now. Times have changed. Things are different and I will have to get used to them, But occasionally I can get out a picture and remember all the good times back then. Because that's what things like that are used for, To bring back the good memories of what it was like before.
Meandering past dusk Within my solace of dreams Across this garden of roses and vine Luminous and vibrant Yearning life anxiously Each a soft dreaming infant Stepping amid buds and blossoms Extolling the blushing rose Oblivious to shoots crushed under my feet I render innocent futures extinct
Never confessing what just seeing you does to me Wishing I could touch your heart I lose myself to fear and fantasy when you come near You are the love of another Dreaming of you often in excusable thoughts of innocence Wishing I could touch your face You are above me in everything at high distances beyond And I am the coward hiding away next to you For you are the eye of God a beauty of completeness pure Wishing I could touch your spirit In these torturous waves I breath deeply of your essence Paralyzed in the perfect desire Through the passing of days I shall ever love and desire you Wishing I had touched your heart
I saw you in a dream I never had sitting on a bench in a depressing slouch face strangeld with tears I saw you in the days that are gone swept away in the receding tide during the duration of a colorless setting sun a sad song sung that day I saw you in the tears I've never shed screaming to break free desspretely seeking shelter from the storm regret stabs at a broken heart I saw you a thousand times today though not figureaitve a fatigued source of thought, conspires against the truth I saw you in the eyes of the others heard your voice above theirs as I wished that they were you, my perfect painted picture was destroyed
My lungs scream for air But my throat is too tight for breath Nobody is there to hear me cry Nobody cares that I just want to die No one understands the pain that is building up inside It's all a part of life But why part of mine? I try to move my hand But my muscles are too tight for motion Nobody is there to hear my try Nobody cares that I'm trying to die No one understands the emptiness inside It's all a part of life But why part of mine? I try to sit up But my legs are too weak for standing Nobody is there to hear me sigh Nobody cares that I'm soon to die No one understands what I'm feeling inside It's all a part of life But why part of mine? I try to wake up But my eyes will not open Nobody is there to hear me say 'Bye' Nobody cares that I know I will die No one understands what it is going on inside It's all a part of life But why part of mine?
Draw from pain,stress and strife. It will help you find better ways to better your life. You will run into obstacles along the way. Trust in God you will grow stronger and wiser each day. Strength comes from struggle and God keeps you strong. Don't let disappointments make you give up. Sometimes things are hard, bitter is the tea in the cup. God puts nothing on us that we cannot handle. All sadness of loss he can dismantle. Stay strong through adversity like a soldier at war. Survive stay strong and heal life's scars. Do not let anything in this world break your spirit. If you have love to give give it. Let others be inspired by your spirit. Remember they are in a better place when you lose those dearest. If you have noone remember God is always there. Strength is knowing someone will always be there.
Staying out late at night she is a taker of substance with a golden tongue she speaks untruths all with out reluctance. Like a captured pray I dangle from her web I am slowly being devoured very soon I will be dead. Where is my defender from this torment my soul cries for mercy yet the sorrow remains consistent So little I would not have done my love was true as I lay now the prisoner of her----- "the one".
You never were that guy were you? You were fooling me all along weren't you? I fell in love with a facade cause you weren't my hero at all You played the part well didn't you You stole my heart like a theif and just when I though you were for keeps you showed me your true colors I just can't believe I let you in so deep you never were the guy I thought you'd be You had me thinking you would change for me and so innocently I fell in to your trap Just like that. Now I have to live with the fact that I let a monster in without knowing You never were that guy and it all came as a surprise but the shock is starting to wear off now and I am better off knowing the truth you tried to play with my head telling me things were different when they were just the same you never were that guy I should have known you would lie cause you did to them you never were
A knock at the door, who can it be? Probably Sarah coming for tea. She usually calls on her way back from work to share some time with me. A look in the mirror, I 'tut' at my face: Why do people always call when there's junk around the place? I open the door - a man is standing there. I wish I'd worn some make up I wish I'd done my hair. It's then I spot the uniform: the buttons made of brass; the stripes that grace the khaki sleeves; the boots that crunch amongst the leaves. I question with my eyes? It comes as no surprise to hear him ask can he come in, and would I like to sit?' He has some rather grievous news - - I dread to hear it. I know what he is going to say. It's all a dream. Please go away. I'm not in to truth today I scream inside my head...... I know what he just said to me, but I didn't hear a word. His lips spoke out in silence, and me, I never heard. He's 'so sorry'. He gets up to go and heads towards the door. I try to rise to follow him but my legs will move no more; for they have turned to jelly and my head is going to burst. It's funny, when you're a soldier's wife, you always fear the worst, But it's only when you hear the knock, the knock upon the door, and see the face you've never seen: the shining boots, the uniform; the mouth that speaks the silent words the apologies and platitudes; 'killed in action in the war" The widow thoughts ring clear.
i am a possibility of many possibilities i am a ratio an indecisive factor in the rest of what this dimension has to offer the world is a top i spin it and predict the probability that the end will equal the means or perhaps surpass it even if i never surpass this muck-up these broken eardrums and the inquisition of my empty head exclaiming empty words and i don't even exist especially to the solipsists, nihilists and i no longer give a sh-- i am now officially some lazy apathetic prick oh i could have been a possibility but that possibility was so small that you'd need a magnifying glass and some tweezers i am rust, oxified and tearing up i am crust, the sh-- in the ring on the toilet i am lust, but never just enough i am bust i am a loser without a leash and/or choke chain
In her layette, she looked fair. 'Nimisha',the parents called her. When aged five,the polio plucked The strings that her legs moved. As a string less violin, her legs rest. In the wheelchair, she grows up, Along with her mother's tension, And the father's anxiety. The rustic children wish her, But nobody takes her To the festival In a shrine rural. She wears new dress, But as the butterflies in her frock, She also cannot flit To the shrine yard. Cough waves, today also, Shake her lungs so. The distant drumbeats and the holy music Move her fingers in the wind rhythmic. The clarion does resonate and ripple The divine thoughts in her ears. She never knew Pneumonia packing her soul. Serenity of the twilight collapses, As,again, the drum storm develops. Few knew Nimisha swooned. Later,the people intoned, "Being holy, An apt day it is." In emptiness infinite, Her parents knew her truly. FABIYAS M V
You never listen Yes I know it's true I see you try and deny it How's that working for you? I will say one thing You will hear another I will try to fix it The misunderstanding you see I just got in trouble (Sigh) I told you so They never listen to me They say they do And I know they try But all I want to do is scream "JUST LISTEN TO ME SOMEONE PLEASE" All I asked is that you think What is real? Do I ever ask this? Will I ever again? All I really did Was ask For friend All I want Is to be free Free to listen And free to be me Sadly though You'll never see Just how much your Not listening has killed me I have tried Really I did I know that I'm not eighty I know that I'm not nice But the only thing I asked For was five minutes (at the most) of your life. I'm sorry that you failed I'm sorry that I tried but Mostly I'm just sorry that I'm not sorry, Not anymore.
"Heal The World" like in Heaven A "Thriller" many believed he was too "Bad" The King of Pops "Black or White" Seven times he cried—"The Way You Make Me Feel" Then he "Eased on Down the Road" Singing: "Earth Songs" like "Beat It," "Leave Me Alone" Now "Ben,"—he is "Gone Too Soon!" ~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~ © Joseph Spence, Sr., 6/28/09 © All Rights Reserved ~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~ The form is 7/11/7/11/7/11/7. The total syllable count is 61. The first line has seven syllables, second eleven, third seven, fourth eleven, fifth seven, sixth eleven, and seventh seven. Rhyming is optional; however, it's a plus. Any variation of the words "seven" or "heaven" must appear in the poem. Invented by Joseph Spence, Sr., 2007. ~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~ Joseph S. Spence, Sr., is the author of "The Awakened One Poetics" (2009), which is published in seven different languages. He invented the Epulaeryu poetry form, which focuses on succulent cuisines and drinks. He is published in various forums, including the World Haiku Association; Poetinis Druskininku, Milwaukee Area College, Phoenix Magazine; Möbius Poetry, and Taj Mahal Review to name a few. Joseph is a Goodwill Ambassador for the state of Arkansas, USA, a college faculty, and a military veteran.
Morning glowed, Phillip. A purple fire burned beacon bright against the stinging stench of napalm. A thick thistle - two feet from your head, wordless in speech, watched with dark misfortune curving letters of prayer above your bleeding valor. A crumpled martyr lying there, innocent as a schoolboy amidst the blare of gunfire - asleep in our country's eyes dormant in the arms of an adopted comrade. I held you - lost brother - tucked inside my soul; nineteen and breathless. The tears inside my empty lungs spilled so softly onto your forehead as I knelt in the center of August's cancerous garden; staring at the mud stained badge nestled peacefully above your silenced heart. I slowly ingested and tasted your bullet-ridden honor, as I was viscerally blinded by the sickening, piercing strobes of a delicate mourning's glow.
Mankind's greatest accomplishment... is death.
I cry until my entrails are laid out before me. I watch the vultures, My insecurities feast on my nerve ridden stomach. I've repeated the cycle for many days. My love forever stains This sea of linens which was once our home. The call of the sirens is strong And resisting drives us mad. How do I know my attempts are not in vein? Is this futile? The upkeep of this tree outnumbers the fruit. I do not blame nature. I allowed this. As soon as I walk away you fully blossom. I was always cursed with bad timing. I must now focus on my own flowers sprouting Before I plant anymore seeds. You will continue to grow As you always have. And I'll still marvel at your beauty from afar. What a grand tree you were. I retract my own roots and return to my bed. I reminisce until I drift away. Becoming a prisoner of my head. Seeing pictures of you and me And dreaming of what was and what will be.
It's chilly where the sun once shone, Mem'ries haunt when I'm alone, Bereft of joys that I had known, My dreams all torn apart. Scorched the earth where flowers bloomed, The dust and ash my hopes consumed, Hes'tations, doubts our passion doomed Ere it had time to start. I want in vain for solace dear, It's dark where once the skies were clear, When naught but what might be I feared And the course our love would chart. Promises broken, Words unspoken, Deep wounds opened, Eyes that cried. Wrongs not righting, Constant fighting, Unrequiting, Love soon died. It's cold here where a flame once burned, It's empty where for you I yearned, It's dead and life will not return To the cinders of my heart. Written for "A Flame Once Burned" Contest December 1, 2012 By: Daniel Beus
My mother was like a rose beautiful at sight frail to touch. She could stand up and say her mind. She needed love I feel like she never got any. And that's why she withered away like a rose. Her heart was pure, her soul made of gold. She'd rustle in the wind, and hide when cold, much like a blooming rose. Day by day a petal would drop 'til nothing was left. She was the dying rose. And as each day goes by without her sweet melody, I tell myself this: I must not cry that she is gone but smile, she was here. Written by my 10-y.o. daughter Payton
A deluded and deranged miscreant. Rode in a rented Ryder truck, Sadistically opposed to his government, He delivered a two-ton bomb. After parking the fateful vehicle, With time fleeting and fuses lit, He fled to his car, Parked, not far away. Hearing the explosion, he made his escape, With a gleam in his eye. One hundred sixty-eight victims died, Leaving countless loved ones behind. April 19, 1995, A date that lives in infamy. The guilty one was caught that very day, And eventually paid his life for the reprehensible deed. The Oklahoma Ctiy National Memorial Now graces the ground Where the Alfred P. Murrah Building once stood. A lone American Elm tree Survived the blast, A symbol of resilience, And the will of mankind. Hopes of closure for the victim's families Followed the perpetrator's death six years later. But closure will not fill the empty chairs Left in the footprint of the building.
I have developed a temporary dislike of the things that I've convinced myself have been keeping you away from me. Mere substitutes that admitted to the murder of your mind. This phone, and this 11 o'clock moon have slayed my reason's for not just blaming your wandering eye. Most of these nights I've tried Ctrl.Alt.Del.(ing) any ridiculous thoughts, by selecting all of the frequently frustrating things that know just how to push my buttons. I don't know why I'm speaking in computer terms, but lately I haven't been able to function quite right unless I'm near one. It's the only way to get near you. Most of these nights, this phone has been the entire left side of my brain, but now my mattress has memorized the rhythm to a ringtone it should've never been introduced to, and now the stupid cushion keeps me awake until it has made sure that I've felt it vibrating up my spine. My intuitive, creative right brain seems to remember being together with it's brother each and every time I remember laying together beside you. I wait for a wanting of your wanting. Muscle memories of warm bodies wrapped up in positions that make your mind say 'what the ****?' I am missing you. The you who remembers that the other members of her body are always here to help; no need to amputate a listening ear, or an gouge out an attentive eye. I still see you. Sometimes, I forget that the phone's main function is to send a signal of information to someone you can't see. Whether it be via text, twitter app or vocally, you want to reach someone you can't see. I still see you. Sometimes, I swear I can see each of the moon's phases during the day; completely filled with life during the time when it's nearly invisible. It's sad though, because New Moon, you show yourself to everyone else except me on the nights I always expect to see your face. Is this a trick man? or have my eyes been gouged out already, and I simply missed the painful message via text, twitter app or vocally? But still, whether with two eyes, four eyes or no eyes, I still see you.
Leaving the last days of August memories of the sea waves crashing Tides that leave shells broken to find ~ picnic memories ~ fireworks night Birthday cakes sparkle ~ sunburns under a sage kissed dessert Moonlight The Summer reminds us of happier days scents of coconut oil and lime reminds us all of what is yet to come ~ The rain comes down hard crying for all souls lost and left behind The birds fly in perfect form reminding all of the September storm begging for history not to repeat ~ ~ In war no wins only defeat ~ two beams of light straight to the Heavens stay through the whole month of September they remind us to listen silently we stand still For the city lives and breaths left with loss many questions unanswered remain ~ Leaving behind August entering Septembers fears ~ I love this poem because it reflects on the past and the coming month in remembrance of history that took place September 11th 2001. In a way it is a oxymoron . from passionate summer nights to the fear embraced in the month coming :)
There's not much to say. I knew her, know some things, but certainly not all. I know how little she put up with fools, how her cooking surpassed so many others', how simultaneously sweet and hard she could be. I know about her smoking, about her jewelry, her faith, all these I'll hold close to me. Every single spark, every star, shines with such a glow, such a marvelous radiance, that we can't gaze too closely at it, lest we cause ourselves pain. And yet, despite ourselves, again and again, we do; because it's not within us to resist the sheer beauty of it all, of stories and of life. A bouquet of tulips for you. We all miss you already, Grandma. I miss you. I know Heaven's got you, taking no guff as always, making sure we're all doing alright. I love you. Andrew James (McGillicutty) Sprouse
They stood amongst the ghostly white powder- As it sloped around them casting that of a dusty spell There was a pure peacefulness left lingering- So evident in the footprints gone by And those empty matchsticks that waved in the winter breeze Such a lonely place in a state of hibernation It was hard for me to remember the landscape as it was Now the still coldness captured that once frisky green meadow- Now a thing of the past faded into an auburn retreat And somehow I enjoyed the solitary of its splendor and change My breath blew a tracer of the warmth from inside me As my biting nibble fingers praised the caress of my gloves I felt the movement inside my boots as my feet pushed me forth deeper into the snow A time to think, and maybe approve the uncertainty of loss Past the fallen limbs that were once a thing of strength and refuge to some A part of me fell from my eyes onto the ground into a frozen icicle- Till they could find the nothingness once paved with the rocks that divided the land Now I sleep with a secret of yesterday and confess my failure to no one The roots of my broken heart will again floorage and cultivate greatness And I will become a land of abundance and determination and be born-again
There comes a time when one must step aside. Leaving bits and pieces of their heart behind. In life everything may not be what it seems. For some it is a lesson they still must learn Memories will be left of sweet words spoken. Love and friendship was always freely given. The voice only heard in the poetry they wrote. A chapter of life has now been forever closed. "Free Verse Writer's contest" Sponsor "Nathan" Written by: Carol ~Sunshine~Brown 8th Place Winner
I sailed unaware into the ocean currents of her life: and smitten, I desired to ride them with her; somewhere along the ocean ways, a seed of love planted in the soil of my heart had taken root and grew--only to perish like a young hope that's fleeting: though I loved her, she still wounded me like a careless knife. In spite of this and myself, I looked for encouragement in her stare; and at the outlines of her graceful form I did wonder: she was indeed a Helen of Troy, a prize, on whose loveliness I so richly gorged! But never was a lonely man more wretched than I was, as she could not return my affections with equal measure of feeling. I would be more glad had she been unwedded to another, and could easily be within my desirous and jealous orbit! In time, I never saw her again; and love, or the appearance of it--like an aborted fetus flushed down the toilet--died with her parting as well!
I'm concerned now with only solitary things the stinging course of an unwiped tear and a small blonde curl wrapped in plastic never lengthening a fleeting smile forced from cheek's hollow its laughter drowned in a meandering brook that doesn't babble just drifts aimlessly to where a leafless tree seems to haplessly scrape its bank in unwelcome companionship I find I prefer the dead blue of skies to the changeling grey where too many shadows wait for aching recognition and I know I'll never sleep again at night because I can't censure with my eyes closed nor control my emotion's line of sight...
MY FATHERS HANDS He the man known as father, worked a common man's labor, Never did this soul complain, even as his last breath inhaled, On earth. Daddy's little girl was I, the apple of eye, one might say, The sparkles pride that lit up his spirit and made the pain Of hardship melt away. Calloused, and blistered, he earned every marks blemish, Strength's scares were worn in my fathers hands. Deeply engraved within the living embodiment, Of truth and honor's pride, I'll carry him within me For the rest of my life. This mountain of a man I called dad, placed these Tiny feet upon the right path, and even when I did Stray he stepped in and led this wayward women Back. In heaven's grace he'll be watching over me, Always and someday no doubt, we embrace once More, and those loving hands will lovely hold this Child now grow, and I'll know again his eternal warmth. In blessing's grace, may the angels watch over thee, Until we meet again, on the distant shores of Nirvana. BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN CONTEST WITH THESE HANDS 12-20-2013 VISUAL #5
Wondering if it's an omen, finding the box in the attic today? A treasure trove of memories into our lives This piece of paper upon which I started to write a poem I remember at the time I could write no more as I grieved Missing you as each day goes by and wishing you were here I know you are in the ever loving arms of our Lord The Lord sent you down as an angel on loan to us You were called home dear and we were not ready I know we will one day be together again Waiting for the day we will be called home also Now the poem I started to write to you is finished Our time together will come again my daughter and never end Written by: Carol Brown For The "Treasure Trove" contest of Linda-Marie 1st Place Winner
Oh, how I miss the dead… ... the softness in their voices That I cannot recreate, the warmth of their silence Where now only cold remains; And I know, oh how I know That they are long gone And I have been long removed From those fuller times But still, when I feel around my heart I find that it is missing things Parts long lost and dearly missed, And I sit here feeling fatally incomplete And I know- that I can never be whole again. But I still miss the dead, And I miss the times When I never knew That I would live on Missing the days when I was whole… -So I still miss the dead And the times when I was not hollowed by loss Living every day with a lighter heart So far from the times when I would never be whole again. And now, so far removed from fuller times, These few missing holes they let in a chill wind And somehow, these missing holes they leave my heart heavy And I know that it will grow heavier yet, But I dread That when I am lost I die not just incomplete But empty- Empty of all I could yet lose.
She's walking past the tombstones, Just came from her mothers grave. As she passes the last stone, her hand graces the top, A chill shoots down her spine. The wind is blowing her hair in every direction, While the leaves dance around her ankles. Tears are rolling down her cheeks. She'd just been talking to her mother for hours, Longer then she ever had before. She explained to her mother how her life had been tumbling downward, Her boyfriend for 5 years had just broken up with her, When she thought he was going to propose. Her best friend since kindergarten had just embarrassed her, in front of everyone. Just to take her spot as Queen of the School. She hears the train coming. She'd been looking for an escape, An escape of her sadness, Of her embarrassment, Of her LIFE. And here is one, just being given to her. Without even thinking, She runs onto the tracks, The engineer slams on the breaks, Honking the horn all the while. She grabs her phone out of her pocket, Begins to text her father. Just 5 simple words. that will mean the word to him. I'm sorry, I love you She looks up at the stars shinning down on her, then at the lights on the train. She just keeps on staring, Without even thinking, Her mind goes blank. The horn is honking, While she just waits. Her mind is beautifully empty, While the train comes closer. She stares down at the train from above, While is halts to a stop, just 100 metres away. Her lifeless body now mingled with the tracks, Just lays there, Motionless, Breathless. She begins to regret, what she had just done,. Her father wouldn't be able to go on, Her sister would be scared, Her mother, if she were alive, would be ashamed. To take a life, let alone your own, Is a crime, that can never be undone. There is no punishment great enough, To serve justice. She wishes more then anything to just turn back time, To just erase what just occurred To pretend it never happened. But this is not like a simple fight with a friend, Or a bad relationship, This can not be erased. Death is not that simple. A bright light comes from above, A sudden rush of relaxation shoots through her, Calmness surrounds her. And then she lets go. Her soul floats away into the night sky, And it's over now. By Sierra Cowan Written the Summer of 2009
The signs started in December When she started waking up in tears each night She was a normal girl with dark brown hair and darker brown eyes She had plenty of friends and a loving family with just one thing missing Her father. Days passed by and turned into weeks but only felt like a few seconds Her life just whizzed by faster and faster until it was just a whirr in front of her eyes Darkness filtered into her heart and mind until she didn't know if she could go on But she had to. She couldn't let her mother and her sister drown in this same pain She wouldn't let them. She pushed all the darkness into the depths of her own heart In hopes to save the hearts of the two people she had left Because what else was there to live for now? The rest of her world had crashed and her mother and sister was all that was left She wouldn't let them drown in pain too. She watched as they started to heal in her loving arms Their hearts started to lighten up once more But hers was just as dark as it was before And growing darker day by day But she wouldn't let that stop her. Suddenly a year had passed... and then two It only seemed like seconds to her but everyone else started moving on Her mother and sister no longer needed her nurturing care But she needed someone to hold on to Anyone... With nothing left for her to take control of, the dark pushed past her boundries It found a way into her soul Until all she could see was dark and no light But her mother and sister were healed now They didn't understand The tears came back and engulfed her soul Bit by bit until she wasn't sure why she was still alive The grief took over like knives Piercing her skin over and over and over It hurt so much. She started to wonder what it'd look like to be dead She could see him again if she was Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to endure this pain? Wouldn't it be so much easier than having to live knowing she'd never see him again? It would. So she started to hate herself All that negative energy was starting to take toll Everyone around her was breathing while she suffocated more and more by the second She wished she'd just choke already instead of living in constant pain If no one would put her out of her misery, she'd have to do it herself She couldn't see any light anymore So she grabbed the pill bottle off the shelf and just hoped it wouldn't take long to die Deep down she still had a spark of light, but she just couldn't find it And now it was too late in her mind to change, to turn back and try to look deeper She was done living. That's when people started to notice that everything wasn't as peaceful as it seemed They started to see how deeply depressed she had become They wanted to help her see the light again before it was too late So they sent her away to see doctors and to take pills to make everything better It was a start. She didn't see a change at first but suddenly she could think clearly Maybe what they were doing was actually going to help her see the light again Yes, she still wanted to die, but maybe that wasn't the only option anymore They cared, and behind all their own problems they were trying to understand They really were trying Six months longer she would be treated and cared for Until suddenly she was sent home from her treatment and care with a smile on her face She had a new perspective Someone had helped her ignite that spark in her heart until it was a glowing ember She had been reborn Sometimes you have to be able to experience the worst of it To come back shining brighter than before And if she had died that cold day in October, she wouldn't of ever seen the best of it Or known that it would get better and it did! And she now sits at her laptop, with a smile on her face and warmth in her heart It's never been an easy road and it won't ever be But at least she knows she's lived through the worst And it can only get better from here So whenever she feels lonely or gets back into that dark spot again She can look back on what she's learned and can read this poem And remember that she survived the darkest depths of depression And she will continue to survive it as long as she lives Because she is stronger now than she ever was before ?
As the bird flew in the swirling wind Up and down the crests of trees A feather (or two) could not resist And off it went with the swirling air. On and on the bird flew, on and on Aimless in freedom the feather flew On and on it flew, in the twirling wind Till it soared above the crested trees, lo! Oh, does anyone know what I feel out here? Does anyone care what I do way up in the sky? Does the bird know that (solo) I took to flight? Will the bird remember and retrace its course?
For awhile, I thought I had. New love. New dreams. New smiles. Letting go, the small things that hurt. They are tiny compared to past, trashed confidence. Never quite finding my true place in the equation. Maybe the answer is stuck in some ugly , frothing math book, somewhere. If so, I won't look there. Why bother. I am made of heart. My only thinking muscle. Whether beating with joy or pain, it's beat is reliable. Consistent. Safe. My only true measure of my own reality. Even broken, it is less painful than letting it rely on misguided thoughts. Feeling lost, while watching agendas, that seem to be the norm. Other people's norms..........not mine. I will never understand the meaning of "self first". I have lived my life for others, since the day I cried at birth. Abandoned. My birth, an inconvenience to a womb. My existence, to make a childless couple happy. A friend, to soften the blows of life for the masses. A Mother, to succeed and fail. A lover, to give and give and give. A spirit to fly. A soul, to yearn. A body to tire. Watching simple selfishness, destroy our world. Reaching with an open, soft hand.....just to so narrowly miss, sharing a loving touch. A touch, that might have saved a sightless and misunderstood, silent innocent. We stay in the background. We have been conditioned by our own experiences, our own shortcomings, our passive tears. A balance, perhaps? To keep the equation from tipping over the universal rhythms? I feel it. Heavy, with doubts of belonging. Wondering how the self absorbed agendas of the stronger minds, stay crisp. No illusive smudges. Never wilting. No room for throwing the afore said agendas, into the hammock overviews, of a rotated picture. Find my place? I'm probably on a list, somewhere.
sometimes i talk to myself, my mind is racing, i dont know what to do... so hard to explain. depression isn't a stage or a faze some kids go through it shatters you... i saw it all. she cried silent in her bed, blood stains covered her favorite jeans, her every shirt, long sleeve ofcourse... she suffered through it all with few people to call friend and more to call enemy even more to say where quite dissappointed.... FAT her first name in school, not started by a bully or a mean rival, but by her sister, and it echoed through her soul, repeating in her mind... over and over again, like the ripples of still water when a pebble is dropped flash frozen in time repeating, over and over again... It was the first name they gave her, millions where created over the years, some unique some repeating again, just as the first had.. gothic they called her, emo, fat, ugly....worse things. but in her mind, things where worse. everything was repeating, over and over again, finally she believed it. she asked for help, from everyone tried to explain to parents she wasnt well, got called a psycho for asking to see a theripist, not from a teacher, not from a class mate, but from her own father, who wouldn't, couldn't, believe there could possibly be a thing wrong.... finally, crying, she confessed her bloody secret to a teacher. rather then giving her time, she is sent back to class crying her eyes out, as if she wherent going through enough... she is sent to the principals office a few minutes later, after breaking down in class... the princlipal says she needs help, sends her and her dad for a risk evaluation, her dads crying as she shows him her cuts... they walk into a hospital room, it smells of chemicals and hand sanitizer, the lady at the desk gives her a smile. then she goes into a room with a lady, her cheeks are sunken in and shes wearing way too much makeup, the girl is gaging on her perfume, and she looks really intimidating.... her dark brown hair looks dead and flat even though its a bit wavy, and she wears somewhat of a mocking frown. asks her all these questions, is mommy beating her? no is daddy raping her? no is she doing drugs? not alot is anyone beating her? pass... did anyone molest her? pass.... oxcarbezapine, trazadone, citalipran, clinazapam, colonipan, valium, lithium, more....... and thats what they gave her, more... some numbed the pain some brought it out tearing through her organs, she became an addict by the time she was fourteen.... over dose after over dose some for pleasure some for pain, gashes on her legs getting deeper, this time she didnt tell a soul, not even those she had come to call friends.... wakeup she screamed in her head over and over again as she dropped weight like it was nothing.... you cant controll it she argued as things became worse. at age fourteen she attempted suicide, she didnt quite succeed. the medication took away her aappitite.... she liked it she hated her body hated herself felt out of controll found a new way to cope as she shoved tooth brush after toothbrush down her throat to keep her body from nuitrients... as she whent weeks and weeks spitting food into napkins and making excuses I ate at my friends house.... spoken as a whisper heard like a sentance echoing in her mind over and over again, along with that word, all the words, FAT!!!!!! ugy, anoying, stupid, fake, worthless, nothing... one bite she would say rocking back and forth craving nothing but food her body racked with hunger pain one bite and there she was again FAT! over and over and over again back to a toothbrush this time she sees blood she saw her ribs she saw her bones, it wasnt good enough, she almost died, again.... choking on this deep dissappointment in herself, gaging on everything they where pushing down her throat, their words, and their insults, their criticism.... their drugs all shoved down her throat like candy and just as she was was trained to do she swallowed despite the bad taste or the hurt or the fact that at the rate she was going she would be dead soon... and you know why? because daddy yelled and couldnt accept what was happening not because he wanted to hurt her but because it hurt him, and she let him believe, because she could take the hurt if it meant he didnt have too. because mommy didnt want to sit in her room all day smoking weed doing nothing, practically having us raise ourselves, she didnt mean to take anger, or frustration or hurt out on her daughter she suffered everyday in her solitary confinement, and from a young age she accepted her bedroom was the cage her mother had created for herself. because sister didnt want to effect her the way she did she was just frustrated fed up with the way things where scared, she needed someone to take her cruelty and to help heal her pain... because people in school who where so cruel had to have learned from somewhere and she wasnt going to play into their games, and they knew she was an easy target because she would never attack someone so weak and she accepted her suffering was a sacrafice to help all these people.... to help her dad, her mom, her sister, every person who was beaten abused or hurt and felt so weak at home they wanted to feel strong in the one safe place they had. because depite the fact she had died inside, and almost passed away on the out, it was a saccrafice she was willing to make so that no one else would have to feel that kind of pain, and they all inflicted it and broke her down'untill there was nothing left but a shell of somthing that could have been and never had the chance and why? because she would take it and wouldnt strike back, because sometimes "just taking it" isnt so much about the weakness not to do anything but about the strangth not to hurt others the way they hurt you...
An old man looking out his door, gaze fixed on a distant shore, reminiscing to a time, not of happiness, or, the prospect of a bright future, to when he was sick to his very core, to when as a youth, he went to war A time before infallibility had meaning, patriotism and bravado the craze, the future was still unknown, vigor for life at its all time high, a time for romance, partying, buying, no thought of pain, deformity, dying Too young to understand or question, ship to foreign shore, medals abound, will impress the girls next time in town, sacrifice not temporary, forever more, a legacy etched into a wall, few will remember, flesh shredded, burned, torn, families mourn A time, when he willingly went to war, will happen no more, all lost in youth, now unrelenting, no blind obedience, minimal risk, long life, his number one ambition As he turns back from the door, he thinks of the youth, here now, soon no more, lessons never learned, the call to war, to common the roar, complacency the mood, another generation removed The old man agonizes over what was originally not known, war is preventable, life too precious to waste, the solution simple, his vision, maybe too late Send old men to the front to fight, arthritis, heart disease, poor eyesight, let the youth enjoy their life, his near over, its only right Send old men, to the front, to fight ask them to give up their life, patriotism and bravado, still alive, will and desire would not last the night, old men do not rush to death in their twilight, failure inevitable, the old man smiles, knows he's right Wars not possible, if old men, are sent to fight
CONFOUNDED ( COLLABORATION ) by~ S.Jagathsimhan Nair When tension grips and the head reels In its ever accelerated twirl When two rays dangle from two flayed poles, And the dumb loss of a moment's truth Looks so conspicuous and an eminently Forgettable lapse of an inoffensive world When the gentle genre to which the slamming Of an ever open door in the face of The rare perspicacity and purpose shown By a soul, a land and a generation belongs Looks so commonplace; when the benign Visitor's countenance does indeed despair And crave a black visor above the originality Of its expansiveness and the staggering degradation Of its vitality; I have this great ache's abundance Stirring in my cupped palms, held out in supplication, Till it rests, for an ever lasting understanding Ever in the vision, ever into its aftermath. by~ p.d. The "aftermath" of any loss seems to consist in any form. An aster plea subsiding every look. Behind glory behind redemption~ Giving rest to the velocity speeding force Creations of fantasy and religion and imagination I paint the skies with my fingertips, to feel the mass The world trembles at the knowledge of relativity. "I sit in displeasure, injecting every generation into my veins!" New born babies, born into this puzzled abyss. Bewildered minds accepting stupendous addictions. A poison to taste every sunrise, Forbidden tongues baffle the night Mental representation, stirring up conflict Foiled toes to hold and worship. Steady vision behind these eyes so confounded. a collaboration with* S,Jagathsimhan Nair my collaboration contest
There's something unspecific about the autumn nights A certain shade of color that uplifts my inner child's eyes Beside a cashmere moon Venus and Jupiter shine bright Complimented by a sea of blinking infinite twilight The scent of burning oak lingers in the air from home made fires Reminiscent of a time when this man was just a child Careless and so free to dream and any dream to live Like feathers floating across a field carried by the wind As a gentle breeze blows through the leaves shivering delightful gloom Unlike flowers of springtime the disheveled autumn vibrance bloom Leaves crackle beneath my feet along the skeleton tree path Where I try to find my peace or a song to make me laugh The air is so much crisper and also soothing when I breathe it in Underneath a starry sky and brighter constellations of Heaven Amidst the trail I pass a lovely couple holding hands While their children run aside frolicking in a playful dance An old man and his wife admire the view from a wooden bench With smiles on their face as if nostalgia is still their closest friend Its these specific autumn affects that bring me sorrows and joy Reminding me of all theses things Ive wanted as a man since I was a little boy Its times like these that I wish I wasn't always so alone Because I would light an fire with my family and call it home
I wake up, Feel the heat of your body beside me, My heart beats You are here. I stir, Reach out to the warmth That was you Your smell lingers , Coffee and toast fill the air. My heart beats You are here. I open my eyes , Slide my hand into a new coldness. Wet on my pillow, Screams from my mind, Remembering-you are gone. I am still here. I turn my face from the day Wrapped in shrouds, Just waiting for someone To nail down the lid. Why should my heart beat? Without you I don't feel-here. I am aroused, Feel a force from within breaking free. I beat the air with my fists. Pound out my hurt, Curse your name You- you- oh why why Did you go and leave me Still here. I awake, Birds sing. It's a new day. The empty space beside me now familiar. You are gone Yet once again my heart beats -Still here-
Yea...I am upset Ticked off to say the least.... TIME!!! A real great friend you are! ARrrgggHHHH!!! I am just....cho... sad. TIME...TiMe.........(sigh)time.... what's your reason this time?
You&me it's like that song:you and me together... it'll never happen you go on with your cap on thinking no one ill see what you wright in your little black book no matter what you do or wear every one can still tell your in love with me! i know but do you? think about it it'll come someday
Not with the longing of a bride, But with the trepidations of one Who is bought and sold, I wait behind half-caste shadows For one I have seen but never known. Today I have come of age, And I will discover What my sisters already know. Perhaps one day I will be grateful For the choice that has been made for me. In any case, it is of little consequence. My body must become supple at his command For fear of retribution. The old women tell me that I was bred For this purpose and, since I am here waiting, I can find no fallacy in what they say. At dusk, my mother washed and braided my hair And rubbed me down in scented oils, All the while extolling the virtues And pleasures of becoming a woman. She spoke quickly, but not quickly enough To disguise the tears I heard beneath her words. And because I could bear her sadness no longer, I feigned a look of anticipatory delight. When she grew quiet, I knew it was time for me to go. And so, I am here waiting for the heavy footsteps to come To take from me that which I thought was mine.
GROUND ZERO Today as I stand here, With your name engraved not just on stone But in the hearts of millions who thank you For not letting them cry, I feel proud that it was you… We wish you were here, There's not a day we don't think of you. There's not a minute we don't miss you. But we're glad you ran into death So that a thousand others could walk into life. It was not your duty, You weren't meant to be there, But you took it up, Did what you had to do As a citizen of the global world. The little ones will never know What a wonderful person you were. But they'll always know that You were a hero… How you died for the greater good… Tears, grief, pride, longing - a blend of everything. Its been ten years, ten long years But the memory's still fresh and cutting. It still hurts to know That you could be here had you stayed back. But you didn't and that's made you a hero. You ran straight into it While a thousand others were running away. Your death is history…. Millions died with you But you stand out 'coz you made your choice. As I stand here, I know that a decade ago, today You were here somewhere, Running into a cloud of dust and ashes Searching for the smallest sign of movement To bring them back to life. Somewhere between the despair and hope You forgot to breathe… I pray every day that History would rewind itself Back to that fateful September morning, Not because I want to hold you back… But because I want to come with you… It would have made a difference. I know it would have… I know you're with me In my dreams, in my daily life Laughing at my blunders, Guiding me through hardships. My guardian angel… On this September morning, Not exactly the same as before, Here I am telling the world That my twin brother died Saving the victims of 9/11.
Waiting. The minutes groan arduously. Somehow, perhaps – my heart fails to beat with the rush of your momentary attention. Perched precariously on spikes Flesh colored, yet artificial – Manikin fingers, fidgeting. Mournfully drenched in factious apology. Our eyes meet briefly, then dart with bashfulness, Choreographed precisely. Words uttered repetitively from wine stained lips Fill the tortuous silence – hesitantly. Your hollow ghost memory, porous and unsubstantial. 'We can work at this, ' you finally choke An unfamiliar innocence, grasping - Your voice childlike in its simplicity. And for a second, I recognized that old stranger. I muster a skeptical nod – and smile limply, dismissively Fingering the rim of my glass. 'And deceive ourselves with promises made before?' I winced with audacity – impatient of your feeling, As the words ripped your heart out clean. You clear your throat in an effort to speak - Those words never did surface... My acid tongue, an all too familiar indulgence. I raise hesitantly, your gaze fixated as I shrink. A tormenting embrace, clothing saturated in your scent Sodden with tears unshed. Humoring your touch with finality – An unspoken understanding sneered behind the mask. Face taunt with incomprehension, as sorrow squeezed out the substance. I avoid the depths of my black dying heart, defiantly. Anemic with reluctance – I usher the door A smiling parody of phantom reminisce - Poisonous and seductive. An enormous tear got away, As you lay fragile and broken – bereft. I'm sorry.
She stays with her unfaithful guy The way she was raised the reason why Living with and loving him for half her life He in return gives her a life full of strife She asks herself does she love him still But, knows in her heart she always will Her vows she honored till death did they part Years later her unfaithful guy died of a broken heart Entry: This Contest~~~ It's Up To You Written by: Carol Brown 1st Place Winner Entered this poem in P.D.'s contest because it seems the sponsor I had written it for thought it needed worked on. This does happen in life but maybe I could have explained it better.(I worked so hard to get the message across)
A radiant star climbed down from the heavens, Planting virgin feet on hard ground, Waiting for the crowd he knew would come. But when it came, The crowd was blinded by his brilliance. Angrily, it drove him behind a high, wide wall Where he remained for some time, Planning his escape homeward. But the wall crumbled Beneath the weight of graspy hands That reached out To dim the luster of a light They could not understand. To shine brightly, a star needs The protection of a clear night sky.
The idly wild emotion of a wind-worked wailing wall, four-wards high and five feet thick, impenetrable they say, impregnable by design, as lugubrious as any ocean, if the seas are as melancholic as their brininess suggests. He would scale this wall. He would walk to freedom, for walking had served him well. Frail of thought and free of features, an oddly proportioned practitioner of the practical and plain, his form belied his fate, for he would meet with beauty, and to beauty he would sing.
The whole idea of it makes me feel Like my childhood is over That I will walk into the world, Empty-handed Maybe I should just give up And never get to be a kid That small slice of hope Could save me from ever having to mature And be my own person No longer attached to my mom Like she is my charger And I am a phone and I would die without her You tell me what to do, But that is because you have forgotten That I am eight And you can't control me But I can lie in bed and remember every digit At four I was a woman, I could give birth At two, a cat Prowling around the house At six, a wizard, The best one around. But now I am mostly staring at that little LED Screen of my phone. Back then, I played outside And my book never sat sadly, On my desk, As it does today. The small words, fading into black. "This is the beginning of responsibility" I say to myself, as I do my chores. Time to say good-bye to sleeping in Time to get good grades It seems only yesterday I used to Make forts, with sheets, Protecting them from monsters But now when I make forts, I watch them crumble, At the monster's victory
What happened? I bolt awake, the heat of the fire Still burning in my brain. Oh, it was just a dream. Or was it? I look at my skin, Realize it's black and bloody all at once Cracked, peeling. I sniff, The whisper of smoke still in my nose, My hair. A tear rolls down my pitted cheek As I remember, like I always do, After I wake up. Reliving that night. The last thing I remember, I was Home, entwined in your arms (your fingers were entwined, too, in the hair I'm stroking now). The heat between our bodies So strong, that I pushed you away; I regret it now. (I just wanted a little space.) Because the heat then became suffocating, consuming, As you rolled over and said this wasn't the same anymore. I couldn't breathe. Soon, I was sweating, 100 degrees and climbing, as you got up and packed your things then left the room. The slam of the front door Was the catalyst. My heart was the match, And I the fuel.... I exploded from the inside out- The flame ripped me open, My skin started to blacken and smoulder. Stop drop and roll? They never taught us what to do In a human inferno. In desperation, I laid there on the bed You and I shared My tears nothing but puffs of smoke as they fell uselessly upon my skin. The tears I'm crying now In the hospital bed Remembering Are no more productive... But my dear friend sitting next to me Who pulled me out of the flames Is there to dry them And to console me Telling me I still look beautiful the wounds will heal And that you aren't worth them anyway. I now know what I have to do once I can leave this place. Months later, My burns have closed, now only scars remain. I walk up the street to the house you and I once shared, Now only a pile of rubble. Picking my way through the charred remains of our bedroom, A curtain scrap there, a chunk of headboard there, A stray blackened sock, I stop, and kneel down in the ashes. I begin to sift through the ashes, the memories, with my finger, Both erasing the past, And bringing it to life all at once, Until I have found it. A blade of grass. One. Standing tall, strong, And unapologetically green. In the middle of the ashes, With the ruins of our life together all around me, I delicately clean the area around the blade of grass with my finger, and I smile.
tiny drops of water cut through folds of refuse laying dormant in the crest of spring where fissures of melting ice retreat. I lay sprawled against the top sheet Eyes fixed on the tempered glass before me drawing circles with the heat from my breath. The yellow light, daunting, and new, creeps slowly aware of the struggle ahead Winter's refuse marks its ground at times, forcing the sun back tucked high in grey skies. The yellow light rebounds stronger this time awaiting winter's demise.
FAREWELL MY FRIEND Within the heart of this gentle man, rocked the storm Of the open highway, a blazing passion that burnt and Singed at his inner soul spirit. Spiritual kindred of the Harley idealism, born to be free, Living with the wind beneath his wings of cycle chrome, An eagle silhouette beneath the horizons lost venues, Of the routes less traveled by. Oh God bless this lost road warrior, for he tried His best to live by the rules of honor, bravery, And courage. Beneath those wrinkles of age, a sparkle lit within Those eyes that remained timeless, but only a biker Can truly understand such passion that drove such A gentlemen such as this friend of mine, known Simply as Tattoo. Oh the open highway is a harsh mistress, clashing Hard with the review mirror of reality, betrayed by The warmth of sorrows distrusting female, it was All that remained left unto he whom loved her Best, but the lure of drugs took him away, Leaving us to wonder why? It is said that God protects the meek and mild, If this is true, may he stand at the right side of The good and just. Beyond these troubling shores, That seemed to bare down upon him so. Let the divine winds of grace always remain At his back, as the breezes of freedom blow Through his graying hair, riding onto the last roads Eternal highway on his majestic Harley, we bid Tattoo a toast in destiny's honor and fellowship. BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN
Zerbrechlich/ Fragile/ Frágil Augenblicke zerrinnen in Einsamkeit, zerbrechlich, Hauch des Zweifels, zerbrechlich, wie Meißner Porzellan, vergangener Tage. Hingestreute Gedanken, verloren in kurzen Sätzen, Vergangenes ausgestreut und vergessen. Zerbrechliche Zukunft, lautloser Horizont, Meeresstille im Windschatten. Vergangene Tage, zerbrechlich wie Morgentau. Gegenwart aufgeschlagen im Buch der Stille, Tagträume, vergessen im Abendrot. ---------------------------------------------- Moments dwindle in fragile isolation, a touch of doubt, fragile, as Dresden china, of past days. Strewn thoughts, lost in short sentences, the past scattered and forgotten. Fragile future, silent horizon, calm sea in the lee. Past days, fragile as morning dew. Presence opened in the book of silence, daydreams, forgotten in the afterglow. -------------------------------------------------- Momentos disminuyen en soledad, frágil, en un tono dubitativo, frágil, como porcelana de Sajonia, de días pasados. Pensamientos esparcidos, perdido en frases cortas, el pasado esparcido y olvidado. Frágil futuro, horizonte silencioso, mar en calma a sotavento. Días pasados, frágil como el rocío de la mañana. El presente abierto en el libro del silencio, los sueños del día, olvidado en el anochecer ------------------------------------- Fragile Momenti diminuire da solo, fragile in tono esitante, fragile come porcellana di Sassonia, dei giorni passati. Pensieri sparsi perso in frasi brevi, diffusione scorso e dimenticato. Futuro fragile orizzonte silenzioso, mare calmo sottovento. Tempi andati, fragile come la rugiada del mattino. Questo aperta nel libro del silenzio, i sogni del giorno dimenticato nel buio
Another morning I got up and my thoughts returned here. Just wanted to put something of the memory that lingers still today from scenes we saw of September 11th. Scenes we would like to but will never and should never forget. I do not wish to cause further despair to anyone but if anything bring some hope to those who are suffering safe in the knowledge that they have the world behind them. What has happened cannot be undone but with strength and assistance from those who had the core torn from them as the horrors unfolded and they watched on in disbelief we can be there for one another. We can make sure the memory of this tragic affair lives on, and in doing so help keep our own souls alive and kicking... in hope all was not in vain, but that we shall learn from it and let the promise of peace win through. My heart and thoughts go out to all. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It doesn't matter today if we build a building of immense height like North and South towers of World Trade Centre even if to use as defence system just as we would have built a castle on a hill in times gone by - times have changed New buildings and memorials will now stand in recognition of who/what was on said land Their memories will always continue as will the vision on t.v. all did view Where minds stood still in disbelief while strike after strike we all felt grief Where tears were shed by billions of eyes War was declared with no defence in skies It doesn't matter today we most probably wouldn't even see as our enemies approached Like a thief in the night they came stealing from us that most precious those whom we loved or cared about What matters today is that for all eternity history has been made Times we cannot change Broken genealogical lines gone forever Marks made on the landscape - irreplaceable Never can anything stand for what was again Humanity and psychological effect remains We may not all have lost those known to us but we stand together shoulder to shoulder Encircling those that remain Knowing each one of us had our soul torn Our eyes darkened by Hells darkest Angels When none could believe that before their eyes Planes came crashing through the skies Out of ashes a phoenix, a nation arises and with it the world reawakens We will not sleep but remember A tragic time when so high a cost was paid with unknowing souls now recognised What right to take such brave innocent lives
Sister, you left me without saying goodbye And lived your life in a wink and a sigh Born in the spring with a short season to give I lost you in the fall leaving a long winter to outlive You taught me love and held me close in my grief I'm wishing we had never put our faith in false belief Nothing could harm us as we sought out love When you were gone, something I could barely speak of I miss your presence even more today On your birthday, this Easter Sunday I have only to hope and pray And wonder about the woman you would have become Lend me your strength not to succumb To sadness, yet whisper to me to go on and grow So I carry you with me wherever I go You're there in my dreams and never really apart Now you can finally take flight and know heaven's heart You are my April angel that will never depart
A scream stretches out into the night A desperate call heard but with guilt ignored An echoing beacon of another battle commence As neighbours run to their bunkers to escape its call As blood drips from walls In separate tombs Two children wait in line Hoping and praying they won't reach the head this time Dreading what raised voices and familiar shouts will bring As they desperately hide beneath timid sheets That had always failed to provide cover they need As blood drips from walls A mother throws herself into the line of fire Desperate to protect her kids from his fists full of anger For she knows if she's not there where next he will turn As her blood drips from walls Plates, cups, glass become the bullets In a battle for the kitchen door Whilst trapped inside for now her children's safety she is sure As blood drips from walls Drink the finger on the trigger held Cruel words the shrapnel that went so deep Every punch of his fist the mighty bomb That tempted fate to end this once and for all As blood drips from walls The excited barking dog Becomes the friendly fire As her arms try to block the punches The dog bites into what he doesn't know A scream of pain for a moment sets still time As blood drips from walls Two children shudder as the ambulance pulls up outside The flashing lights a breeze of hope dancing on their bedroom ceilings Just maybe somebody might come and take them now Guilty in their selfish need as they feared for their mother loved As blood drips from walls But as they drifted into exhausted sleep Freed for a night from his rage as he sat and feared losing all he controlled In a hospital room their mother retreated into a lie Surrendered all of them to many years more Because more than she feared the war She was terrified of the loneliness from losing his love Believing every time he told her you're not good enough As blood drips from walls
I lay here, unarmed, and vulnerable to the damage that has been done. I want to cry, I can cry and I will. The feeling of it all, discomforts me, hypnotizes me, leaves me wondering; who have I got left? I think and the answer terrifies me, shakes me; how come? I have no one. These breaths, they puzzle me, how do I breathe for nothing? No one? And yet so eagerly, I look up for better things, brighter beginnings, but the thought ends, will I truly be happy? Can something powerful enough in the days ahead of me give me comfort? Bring me peace? Yes I have been fooled, betrayed several times now. I have figured out my flaws; I trust too much, love too much, and forgive. I don't know why but I seem to refuse giving up this false matter, false clinging to this object, idea, or spirit, named "Hope". Yes it beats me up, yes I have been slain, slaughtered, and shattered; in the walls of denial, and query I was trapped, destined to taste suffer, with the eyes of mine I did see, moments, and events that slaughtered me like ice and fire, those eyes of mine, show me things I don't wish to see, they slaughter me, although part of me, organs of my being, they still do. In the times where I thought I was strong, in times where I thought hope would save me, now it shatters me in the presence of all thy people, makes me its slave by clinging to it, begging for mercy, for chances, and for that I am weak. They all thought I was strong, unbreakable, but now everything proves them wrong; I do break.. These tears I thought will cleanse me, purify, and strengthen me, but now whenever I do cry; those tears are just like whips that drain out my strength, deteriorate my goals, and terrorize my dreams, and so I abandon them..
Please, turn the music down And keep your voices low; There's a new song I'm hearing now In a voice that's soft and clear: It's the One who's always been with me . . . He's walking closer now. I've lost all things I've ever owned: I cannot bring Him gifts Or sing His praises now. I have no strength to do great deeds: I stand before Him . . . empty. What does a Savior, such as mine, Need of earthly things? The whole wide universe is His. Or what great deeds Or songs from me Compare to those the angels sing? So, like a child, I lift my emptiness And bring Him only praise. I lift my soul, and wait For Him to cradle me In His eternal, loving arms. Shhhh . . . hush your voices; Keep the music down. The One who's always been with me Is walking closer now. (For Jan, with the beautiful singing voice, who died of ALS at an early age.)
I'm tilling to forget that night of fire and betrayal. Turning the soil over, over and over, over days months eons. Waiting to be fed when belly aches with hunger and thirst. Did you have to poke out my eyes? Make me remember silk? I am a thousand fists shaken in night sky. I am broken on gravelly field, a puzzle, my boiling blood walked off left me skin stretched under hot sun bleached bones poke out. The others walked off in disgust when you left us without. Once our riverside hideout let us launch our toy ships, rode bubbles, slid over rock churning fast and away... The baby down pasted nest no longer holds us inside, too noisy, cramped in quiet spots by sea, beg drown sorrow. I'm tilling to forget, turn soil over and over, hope to eat, hope the fire that escaped our soil hope it was just a dream. Hope you didn't steal our resources, steal all our heritage. We have no future echoes loud down the halls of lost time. We did the tilling that launched you into a tomorrow. There you are, sailing free, happy. We remain. Left behind.
Visions of pain and despair, with horrors of daily life forced upon the masses through modern windows of technology. These images burned into the minds of the innocent millions of sinless victims oppressed by today's tools of extortion by society. Images so powerful and prolonged within the soul, they're toxic to the mind and body causing you to purge the evils through pure emotions. Some images affect the world with disasters to unbearable to fathom, with hundreds of thousands sent to the after life, with walls of water surrounding Gods hand picked for life after death. Sinister images seem to over power the exemplary, and moral images seen through out time as noted in the calendar with December sixth, and September eleventh, as countless human beings were visited by Death. Weapons of mass destruction sought through Fat man, and Little boy, that devastated a country, with the might of the suns power, in a blink of an eye solely designed to kill and destroy humanity. Images of hope so easily forgotten within major catastrophic events, as the media has a part so intrusive to this equation of corrupting the minds of millions with the craft of deliverance through modern arts of technology. Society eats and devours this information with greed and voracity like army ants to its pray.
It began as a lovely September, 2001, at least, it should have been..... somewhere lost in the crossfire, between summer and fall days growing short, and evenings long But, things are warped into a sense of surreal. What was seen, can it be real? It's as if bifocals are mixed in a bin, out of focus, glossed over with grim Someone lets me borrow a broken pencil, I find paper blowing in the acrid wind my fingers shake with tensile fear....and, I write a goodbye.. I don't know why...... The city, an ediface in shades of gray stone, smoke, rubble and ash, littered streets, silent people, crying people, screaming people in fright A playbill shouts, "LIVE! Mandy Patinkin Concert - The Neil Simon Theater", ripped, and frayed around the edge...blowing into my face, .... now in my hand How strange....we were there........was that just last night? It began as a lovely September, 200l, or it should have been..... Sirens, shattered concrete, sidewalks, shepherding the living into the arms of someone, or maybe, .... into the arms of no one Someone is borrowing a cell phone, ... there is smell of burnt sulfer Bridges, crosswalks, that will take them back into calamity, .. our new reality Someone lends me a broken pencil, I find paper blowing in the acrid wind I write a goodbye... I don't know why...... It began as a lovely September, 2001, or it should have been.... _____________________ 10/3/14 For The Challenge "Chopped" Sponsored By Craig Cornish
Native, Liteskin, sun kissed smiles sit, talk, get to know me a while for I am not my skin and even though the tan pigment runs deep I am my heart, thoughts and actions,reflection of company I keep A car accident took my Homies brother this morning and as we sit and talk to him now, through faded room mourning Young man, stole pop's keys from sleeping pockets joy riding with friends headlights beaming, MN summer star sky gleaming Dad's unaware, boy & friends left till woke, by early morn' meeting God opened the skies and took two good ones away I felt it rained, clouds crying briefly for them today 70 miles an hour, Murderapolis streets took two good homies heartbeats jus' a mile away, a close friend heard the tires screech Driver yells to him, "get a knife & cut me out!" Neighbor, like doe eyes in headlights filled with doubt ends up dying after all at the hospital down 29th Ave and McKinley St. Two of the Five Souls involved God, now, does keep I recall seeing the drivers smile less than one week ago why Mista Watkins & White Jr. was it yo' time to go your loved ones may never know We don't always understand the Lords plan but He surely knows heartache and sorrow is how July fourteenth does go two significant young Southside sons at 3:30 am, drove into a utility pole crushed glass ridden streets two homies, with us no mo' I pray Jesus be with them and theirs as they grieve, and friends surround them with the love they need car accidents & tragedies like these close to home to you tend to place things in perspective defrost a persons mind set it into view cuz' its not about the color, of your skin, or where you came from it's the way you impact the world in the end, who you've grown to become the lives lost, were good peoples Stood for good values like Church steeples vibrant athletic youths of the future barely 14 & 17, gone too soon I hear the sad, cry, lonely night of our Loon Murderapolis streets, claim two more young heartbeats you will forever be remembered and loved, keep an eye on us from above, we know you're in a better place, were all running an impossible to win race for we all have a time card to punch under the Lords undying grace your Influence and charm, young men is locked within us Safe and we shall all party again in the Kingdom of Heaven our final resting Place 7/15/2010: R.I.P.- Patrick Watkins (17) & Duane White Jr. (14)- South Side, Minneapolis, MN you are forever loved and missed, but not forgotten, watch us from Heaven, Amen
Sitting on a lonely bench, Memories got me blenched, Your heart I tried to clench, Though, the rains got me drenched, From hearts I needed to entrench... Your words not retrenched, From things I wanted to bent, While you often tended to bend, Without letting me mend... You, I tried to fend, You borrowed and erased te times I used to lend, Manipulated and used by you, Pretending to be a friend... From hallows I scended From errors you descended, My life wished to be attended. Even though, you got me expended, My hands were still extended, Even though, you got me offended... The times I misspended, You still condescended me, Though, the changes were about to be impended, I was still amended, And I was still intended... But, I was not comprehended, Even though, you were condemned and untamed, While I was aimed to be blamed, Still, more thing you wanted to borrow and gain... Although, this is the end, The ways, I will paint, For the pains to get unbended, As I contemplate nature and life, With memories that swayed and portended, As my soul slowly transcended, While sitting on a lonely bench...
"Anna, put on the shoes your dad gave you." I obeyed. He had given them to me for my birthday before he Was taken away. I haven't seen him since that day. But, mom tells us that we'll see him again someday. Melancholy had masked my mom's face all morning. My brother and sister sat on their bunks with sorrow. It began to run and grow down their pale pastel cheeks As mom somberly told them… "Your sister and I are going away, promise me you'll brush your teeth and always pray. Peter, you take care of your sister, you're the man of the house now. It's not that bad, oh my beautiful babies—don't be sad. I love you!" "Let's go!" as the guard pushed me and my mom. She picked me up and placed me in her arms then harmoniously hummed my favorite bedtime song. Then, we walked into a chamber. She said "Close your eyes" and that's the last thing I remember. Submitted for Abe's "Leather Voices" contest
I was standing in a queue at Mumbai Airport And there in a parallel queue a stunning beauty Our eyes met, the faces were quite familiar As we graduated same year from the same university. *Kalpana, the vision of my green salad salad days Never had even a dream I will meet her like this Boarding the same British Airways air vessel. We travelled together, talked for the hours. Discussed and debated our hopes and dreams. I was headed for the British University for further study And she, the exponent of Kathkali dance for Albert Hall We navigated each other's mind, body, and the dreams. Before the aircraft landed at the Heathrow Airport Promises were made, dreams and hopes were shaped Standing together with hand in hand at check-out queue People running here and there in chaos hearing some rumor. The vision gone and I standing alone in the Airport. Even today, waiting for the vision lost in the turmoil. Dr. Ram Mehta * An Indian name of a girl meaning vision or image ======================================== Second Place win in: Contest:The One Who Got Away sponsored by Thvia Shetley
We worked together And built a wall, Brick by brick Was laid in place. The puzzle Of our lives Became That wall. How sad it was To discover We lived On opposite sides.
Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION
Your glorious emerald eyes Glisten in the moonlight Glisten in the moonlight Delight dances in the water I watch it joyfully You are set free from the cage... You're like a dove soaring in the sky You are the rain... drizzling down in ecstasy A hint of ecstasy is shown in your reflection... When you caress me... I'm relieved... From the stress that forced me in chains I knew we'd be on the brighter side of tomorrow We're glistening in the moonlight I knew we'd become candles in the heavens above us We're glistening in the moonlight For a moment, I felt your presence...your radiant with sympathy I saw at first glance the dark side of you Tonight, we'll be together and fly through the horizon We'll watch the sunset say its last goodbye... We'll wave a greeting at the moon! We glisten in the moonlight... What if I was as handsome as the lion... Roaring with pride and pure courage What if we were glistening in the moonlight? Would it bring health to our bones tonight? Would it make our heart rejoice and overflow with delight? Would we be able to survive this horrifying plight? Would we be shimmering like a candlelight? We're glistening in the moonlight... (6) Ohh...yeah...ooh yeah...ooh yeahh... We reach to the stars and hope we can trace a shooting star I feel the coolness run down my fingers... We're glistening in the moonlight You're the dandelions in the fields You're the gorgeous view that I marvel at everyday When you kiss me, I live my dreams We glisten in the moonlight In a quick moment, I sense a feeling of endless renewal I roam inside of your illuminating maze Glow on... sunshine... Glow on...sunshine... Glisten in the moonlight... Listen to the truth and rub it in You are ravishing like the sunset But you're ascending while I'm descending I feel extremely guilty I wish I could glisten with you in the moonlight You're glistening in the moonlight (6) Ohhh yeahh... oohhh yeahh... ohh yeahh You're glistening in the moonlight (4) We go our own way I wish we can glisten like the moon Glisten like the sun There's a dream concealed inside of me... Reveal your light and pour it upon me You glisten in the appealing moonlight While I'm subsiding... you're fulfilling your dreams Of gliding across the horizon You're independence... keeps on scorching with satisfaction While I'm below you... Your emerald green eyes Stared me down like a hawk... Your emerald eyes Gaze down at me genuinely... I wish we could flee together in reality... That could be a possibility To glisten in the moonlight in glee We were glistening in the moonlight (3) But that was only a dream... I'll pray that it turns into a reality We were glistening in the moonlight Now, I've misplaced my delight... Will I ever experience such a brilliant night?
November-a-drizzle on that west coast grey not far from the billowing factory plumes where weary men and temp-clerk 'girls' punched the clock to buy more time in the Dewdney Trunk trailer court Holed up against that wintery veil of certain loss they buried their growing vulnerability beneath the slow rise of abandon, trembling on bated breath and beaded sweat and sweet scattered lies, that Perennial harvest rooted-deep in whispers what if? what if? if only? they'd planted truths in that hard ground like we mattered— any cost less than this stark expanse of springless regret
When I see the dreams. Of yesterday, Float by like clouds I stop . . . Reach out . . . And hold them . . . To my melancholy heart. One by one They disappear, Like sand I clutched . . . When I was young. Leaving me with nothing . . . But . . . And empty shell. . . . And, then . . . I come to now, When you are at my side, And pleasure possesses me . . . Until I cry.
I watched the sun topple from the sky like a child's red rubber ball bouncing out of control I almost caught it but I couldn't lunge fast enough reach far enough to grasp it and it ricocheted out of sight I watched the dawning of a new virgin spring fade away into nothingness before it had even begun I almost stopped it Almost pulled it back into its position in my immediate future But there is nothing substantial to cling to in what could be or should be I watched a blue-blanket wrapped baby being carried away from me through the sterile silent corridor I almost kept them from taking you away Almost kept you with me safe inside me But God's will was stronger than my will I almost hated God for teasing me with visions of what could never would never be I watched life walking away on rubber non-skid soles that never seemed to touch the porcelain tiles The ephemeral illusion of life in its purest form A mother with a baby at her breast I almost rose up to chase it but my zest for life vanished with the fleeing vision I almost was able to nourish you watch you grow Now I'm left with memories of what will never be but will forever be unrealized dreams I was almost a mother Almost had my baby to hold Almost felt your baby kisses touching my soul But almost doesn't count You were only ever almost my little boy but forever my littlest angel The fluttering of your baby wings beating the rhythm of my heart Carried safe in my soul where you will never know sorrow never suffer the cruelties of this world You took the spring and wrapped yourself in the warmth of the season as you entered eternity without your mother's arms to cradle you You took the sun from the sky because it was your red rubber ball and you didn't know if there would be toys in Heaven Almost doesn't count But forever does Happy Birthday Randy (my littlest angel) March 18. I love you forever.
(in memoriam, Eugene Lawler, d. January 29, 2012, aged 83 years) --- Note: "The singing machine" is a not so tongue-in-cheek reference to Gene and his penchant for singing whenever and wherever he wished, as well as to his karaoke equipment and his nickname at bars that featured karaoke nights. --- You fancied yourself a singer, and indeed you were. What songs we heard from you you had made your own, and you gave them freely to all who would listen (though we were just a few who were, at times, inattentive.) Time and remembrance may color the images you left behind, and the sentimental songs you sang (and scribed on silver disks for us to hear when, and if, we will) may prod us to recall your willful, dour demeanor which could bloom into benevolence or darken further in stormy sneers at tardiness, or at perceived maltreatment of any sort. You were your own arbiter of behavior who kept before you expectations of what was appropriate, for yourself and for us, the others of your kind. We were few (still fewer now), who flocked together on occasion to celebrate, in quiet fashion, whatever anniversary we chose -- perhaps your passing date will become another to be marked. And your voice, reproduced mechanically, amplified, may remind us of our loss, and of yours.
15 years old. It was a brain tumor, they'd said. Holding past the current; undertow of reality slapping my fragility cold – (steel bars won't hold water – movement always finds its way) O', how the lies twist! Twist like the dusty branches on an old, gray apple, holding appraising rooks from another's waking nightmare. Suicide, they tell me now. A menagerie of years too late. Oh…and by the way, he's not your real father; your real father was dead to you the moment he found out. This guy's just The Black-Maker – (mother stealer; innocence taker) a mass of dark waiting to fall; waiting to burrow beneath light skin (so dark, even the sun lost hope) exponentially surrendering - stuck on repeat. The temper of blood lost, melting my thin ice – can you sense the coiled, un-leashed? Like a waking May snake tasting the indifferent air for the first time since snow; out of its burrow, and striking its own skin ripe; bleeding my vinegar still, sweet; distilling a wicked brew (a science experiment gone bad) until the steel breaks and every molecule of unoccupied space is reduced to motes; unseen in the shadow of its dying host. A ticking time-bomb: Sex, drugs, drinking – all manner of loose cutting; memory re-making, recapturing of her long dead ghost, exhumed from its protective bed of lies – and how that double edge twists to this day. Only now, it twists in wind through my reclaimed space. The sign across my chest reading, OCCUPIED, instead of SPACE FOR RENT. 37 years old. It was suicide. This I know – lies all told. But, it was also her greatest gift – her young life tolled; my life, paid in full through the tears of time. (dried up like an ancient river still baring the scars of once was…) From one parent to their child, the gift of life remains the greatest gift of all. Nothing was ever taken from me. No…only given - un-leashed; un-bound; un-coiled. My own struggle baring weight - her wrongs come to my light - I am the Light-Maker now, and as straight and long as the journey from one star to the next; and the next, and on. I have stopped fighting my past and embraced it. Thanks to all, (life/her/them/Him) I am learned and open as renewed hope from the heart of God. *For Michael's Un-Twisted contest. This is part of how I un-tiwsted what came to me twisted; how I un-did my knots, and gave thanks for those knots instead of trying to fight them.
When someone steals from a store, and strong arms the owner… When he walks down the middle of the street, daring others to stop him. When he wants to stop traffic by blocking the streets… he is a fool. He's a Bully and Thug, those who follow him are: nothing but fools. When others follow him and destroy a community, they are thugs. They are nothing but criminals, marking and claiming their territory. When the police stand by allowing them to loot, and burn stores… Remember: If you dance with fools, be careful, you don't become one. Thugs destroy communities, to give them free reign, makes you a fool. Letting the storeowners lose every thing… makes the police fools. Watching them destroy more stores and to walk away with alcohol… Letting them celebrate, burn, and loot, all night long, then police are fools. To cordon them off is not enough, put them where they belong… in jail. Remember: Dance with fools, and be careful, you do not become one. Those stores keep your community alive; their taxes pay police salaries. Those stores feed families… The good people will quickly leave. When the community is an empty shell… Then who are the fools?
*** I would like to give a shout out to the lovely Scarlett Williams who inspired this thought... These feelings have been bottled deep inside me for many years and needed to be released.... Thank you my dear...*** She is devout catholic with a strict religious family... VERY strict... I met her in college.. Her father was the dean of students.... Could not stand me... She was pure when we met, it took three months... I fell deep in love well before sex.... Her mother loved me, her sister loved me even her Chihuahua loved me.. Her father thought I was a dog, which I was.. I am not going to lie.... She changed that about me, caged that animal... I fell deep in love.... Well, after two years together her father one weekend decided on a motorcycle trip... His front tire exploded at 70 MPH and he was thrown 150 yards down the freeway... Nearly died and he lost 45% of his memory... She was devastated, I became a stranger..... I have been through many since and have not found a woman who can capture my intrigue.... Make me fall once again... I yearn for that!!! I meet girls I NEED a woman I hold no hatred for her... She will always hold a special place in my heart... She changed my life, brought me into a new world.. I have many fond memories.. Like a picnic in the Oquirhh mountains in S.L.C. next to a spring... We ate, talked and made love... It was beautiful... We had something special... That was the past and will forever be... A memory..... She WAS the love of my life... I look forward to creating new memories with............. Jared Pickett 5/15/2010 Asavvy1
none of us will see the next century none of us will see the next dimension why should we care? but they feel it the empaths, the watchers, the light, of creation its coming, change on broken wings, it flies past as the world peels off her layers. she reveals herself to be in torment and we parasites go about our everyday life ignoring her screams for our mercy so if I the poet? can draw attention to her plight I will scream I will curse I will burn effigy of every god known to man its time to notice its time to take action So I scream a thousand poems and cry a million tears until the wash of my sound can be heard
A ship in a bottle… that is who I am – Never truly being able to sail free, trapped in melted silica. How I yearn for this barrier to be shattered, if only to ride the waves, reaching then touching shore, which happily tickles their feet... Better yet, what I would give to be that sand. How ironic that I put myself in this situation, with only distorted images as my view. She frolics in that vermilion dress, as he happily makes footprints. She shows him how the crab skitters past, and they mimic its sideways walk. The sun shines with them, as the sea breeze dances along… I hear their laughter, but it is hollowed out by the silent screaming waves of my heart… I watch their happy scene unfold, but my vision is blurred by defiant tears that don't dare fall. I blink. And see them clearly now… They have moved on without me. 10212011
And when I learned that you died How can I describe The empty Empty Empty You were my boxer in the night Sparred with you About every aspect of Life My secret tonic Made everything Feel alright Got me through it all All the frustrations Disappointments of Life And when I learned that you died How can I describe The empty Empty Empty We called each other friend Even when Our bodies came together That single Lunatic Moment That single Lunatic Time And it felt so Full You made me feel Full How can I describe The full Full Full My life was full When you laughed It felt so full even When you Cried The times I was mean And my body left Your body After That single Lunatic Time And so we pretended We were just Friends In the end We pretended Then And now you're Gone And I can barely speak Or write I can barely write A Single Meaningful Poetic Word And there's a quiet room In my mind Where your laughter Once Played My innocent child Woman Gone Away How can I describe The Empty Empty Empty How can I describe The empty Empty Empty How can I describe The Way I Feel?
Il vaut mieux- as there was nothing. None knocks at the door, as I don't knock more A horse doer, escaping from the stable I penetrate a place then dropping from the window Humming – hawing, Rushing, Sighing, -In a far bench I count the stumbling words, trailing the weakened tongue Il vaut mieux- as there will be everything. I come looking for incision to run away The scattered papers, I let go Trying another iron or wooden door I'm crazy about wall's hole Joyful, Sorrowful, Lustful, Our relation is like railway lines We meet underneath the pressure of changing the course.
If your love was like the Namib; Mountainous and bare, Would you dig deep for water? Would you scour the ridged crevasses there? For something that moved, Within and without, Trying to remove, any and all doubt. If your love was a deserted plain; Parched and dying, Would you search in vain –? Weather-worn, beaten, sand-blast hewn; Pecked by vultures – circling, Stung by bees – swarming, Gouged by the horns of a great Wildebeest; Devoured in the jaws of a mighty hyena, cackling, with delighted spite at your plight. If your love was arid; barely breathing, Would you imagine A mirage of pelicans, seething, Pink to the horizon, hungry and feeding. Could you still dance to the silvery moon, Sway and kiss the Milky Way, and swoon. Could you make a sand castle stick; Or would it fall through your fingers – Quicker than quick. If your love was a desert; Would you hide like an ostrich, in fright Or, chatter like a baboon, through the night Would you roar like a leopard Looking for it's spots Or fight like a lizard who knows what's what? If - Your - Love - Was - A- Desert - Cast in Stone. Deserted, Desolate, Designed to destroy; Would you lay down on the scorching sand; To wither and die. Or mutate to survive – why? Would three raindrops; Dew-soft and honey-sweet licked from your skin Make a river that flows, wide, wider and thin If your love was brittle and dry; Would several clouds in a clear bright sky, Make you cry, allay your fears, Or bring you to your knees. Would you rest on a rock to renew your will, Would emptiness give you impetus to fill? If the suffocating heat of relentless rejection; Stifled your breath, Would your mind be plotting, an early death? Would you quiver like a zebra, Stampede like an ox, Sting like the scorpions tail in a knot? Or - would you Soar away like an eagle – across the skies; Coo, coo as a dove perched on high. Find an oasis calm and green, And squat like a quail, soft and unseen. Think about life, and it's true meaning. Be still, patient, accept; That glorious seeing. An open field; flower-filled and breathing. Life lived in a reality of beauty and feeling; Hung out boldly with the stars, for the dreaming. Forget about love; lost in the desert; The impressions and depressions, of the changing landscape. Blood, shed from wounds; in the Valley of Death, The fire ants have taken, to their beds.
The Sadness in my Soul At first it was joy, many hugs and kisses we gave eachother. Life was smiling at us. We went to many places, you and I. We never had fights, or big time arguments. We just lived happy, back in those days. The years passed and we were still together. I thought that nothing could cloud our happiness. Destiny has a date to keep. One day God called you and you went with Him. I was left alone - not knowing what to do. Now I sit here remembering the past, looking at old pictures. The sadness in my soul is - looking at those pictures and knowing that you are not here anymore... 10/15/2013 Written by Lucilla M. Carrillo
You said you gave me life I say you came into mine He said, she said – you always thought you were right Blinded by your own self absorbed mind, you lost it All you thought you had - so much for your one sided life you are alone, you are now alone you would never admit it - you are always right so you say in your own mind No longer to stay as a sidelined existence She – just the other, made a life of her own Not blinded by the one who always thinks their right Standing strong & independent - no longer the 'other' but the lead role on a path, in charge of her life you however are now alone would never admit it you are always right so you say in your own mind
Do you know what's haunting? Losing someone and hearing their name, voice, or you hear something that reminds you of them And you go blue. A dark blue, but a beautiful blue because that's the best kind of haunting A beautiful haunting its something you can love so much but hate even more. It's rather sweet thinking of someone so much It's rather real.
Path of trod packed gray snow berries on trees around its edges grow. Fine drawn tails of branches bared bud less against a sky that covers sun and high clouds; over this place lost in time. Shrill yet sweet bird song adding to my sense that certain things are best not experienced alone. Mind elsewhere I slip my boot twisting down and under an exposed root leaving me half sitting and cursing. Having done its work in delivering thoughts of you it frees my foot. As I cross Lovers bridge over the rushes with my newly acquired hobble I find myself playing with a thought .. is it better to believe I am strong than to try to love?
Reach through the glass to where A thousand suns ripple in the rivers of your hair Reach through the glass to where A garden of roses blooms in a moon beneath your eyes Reach through the glass to where Earthquakes resounding chaos reside in your quivering lips Reach through the glass As my clouds begin to roll away To where my raindrops danced on the tongues of gods bowing at my feet voracious starving dogs quenchless and subservient ignorant and blind as their worlds crumble and fall and every ancient star and dancing horse in the night sky collide with the invisible walls of futility and I trample on all and nothing in a spiraling cataract of silver water and a silken spray on a butterfly's wing fluttering the childhood fields of yesteryear and evermore forever young in brilliant dance immortalized in wheat and dirt and wind and rain and I stand defiant! To where my fingertips can reach no further. Butterfly wings in fields of concrete. Bland.
To gain a friend is to lose loneliness To gain poverty is to lose many friends It's sad to see the edge of selfishness To see the waves and tides and trends But one who gives, gives love so simply And one who goes, goes alone Yet here you stand alone, but loved Even if you stand and beg For someone to throw an empty bone
This isn't the time to run away Nor is it the time to hide they say "use your whole heart and take a dive" I forgot the past while I lay in your arms you partially held me became my blanket for the meantime I swam in you and you in I threw caution to the wind I didn't think that eventually I'd cry well I knew I would eventually cry but my brain and my heart hadn't made it that far yet. I forgot about the boundaries and entered unchartered territory I went places that I shouldn't have gone because I desired you more than anything you occupied places in my heart that should have been left alone but I unlocked the door for you and here you'll stay forever I still get shivers when I hear your voice And your energy makes me feel like I'm a boss you see the thing that attracted me the most is that you picked me up when I was lost. I fell into you even though I knew the cost. Now my heart will always be thirsty for you. Like damaged hair it became porous. I don't blame you though. And surprisingly enough I don't even blame me. We saw a chance to steal a goal but ended up stealing things we couldn't keep. For a moment I owned the property, even if in secret. But the bank took you back and put foreclosure on my feelings. Now I'm left scrambling here and there. I gotta roll my sleeves down and brush off these lingering feelings. This isn't going to be easy because I will still be me and you will still be you. Its like trying to get away from a walking advertisement as big as the ones in times sqaure advertising someone whose perfect for you. But that reality is unreal so I put one foot in frount of me and slowly start to move.....
I never overcame your departure brothers since then my feet walk crippled the kidney only filters half of the residues my heart partially collapsed and beats insufficiently the gastric juice became acid and corrodes the sweetness of dreams the bronchial airways are carbonized and emit a roaring echo the neurons lost innumerable synapses when dying necrotic but here I am with my soul regenerating light so that the guide with the candle calms my rumble of jungle
Her voice was soft on the telephone She had gentility, like the part of the city she once lived We talked of tragedy and chicory coffee My friends had told me the situation was still grim I asked her of Galatoire's and Brennan's Of the Ninth Ward, and of her home While I, pining and homesick, sipped coffee the color Of the mulatto Mississippi River. . . So polite and patient she was For one who had lost everything
You are the teardrop I will never cry A fine mist shimmering in my sight allowing me to see through your eyes If I should stumble I will be okay for it is just my feet accommodating your step as you walk along with me I promise I will dance in the rain and dare the thunder which calls my name From life's storms I will not hide for you are always at my side Your eternal breath a sad sigh echoing through my soul fluttering butterfly kisses upon my heart You are the song left unsung A lilting melody repeating endlessly Life's ink ran dry before love's fair ballad was done Monterey Sirak 11-2 13 for Eternal Breath contest sponsored by Gail Angel Doyle
How I wish to reverse the time and kiss you beautiful eyes. Hug you very tight and never let you go.. That voice of yours that made me shake and fill me with passion to love you more. I miss everything of you. I miss even our differences. Even when you would get after me, i knew it was because you cared and you loved me. You wanted what was best for me. Now Im alone, all Alone. I wish to dream of you every night and see you precious eyes seeing me once more. I miss you. I love you.
I was in a field near Maitland, just wading through this rain and I'm feeling about as ragged as my jeans Mali went home to lay down just before this rain started spinning this old man's mind back into a dream so I pulled my wood flute from my dirty red bandanna and played it softly as I learned to sing the blues didn't hear the words or see the lies just held Mali's hand in mine We must have sung every song this grand-pa knew Dreaming is just another word for nothing left to lose Nothing means everything because this life it ain't free And feeling good was so easy, Lord, Till I sang the blues In real life feeling good was good enough for me From her fast track to play time, she loved laying in the sun That's where we could discuss the secrets in our souls Through clear and stormy weather, arguments and the fun Yeah, this blue eyed baby girl kept grampa from the cold On a clear day near Amplatz, Lord, I felt her slip away You knew she went to look for her Big Bro, I know Liam found her I'd gladly trade all of my tomorrows for one single yesterday If I could be holding that precious Mali on my knee To remember is yet another word in this life some must lose Dreams, hope and deep faith that's what Mali left me Speak often to all who cross and you will realize who is free Learning this together was good enough for me and Mali McGee
To my girls I want you to know That I see you As equals on every level Not just my daughters My little pink princesses I see you as young women Powers within this world With oceans to offer A lifetime still to learn. Live your lives As though I was still with you Be free and fearless For you can see Life is so short Take all opportunities And shape them to your dreams You have all the tools And I will be watching over you Be good to one another There are only two of you The strength between sisters Is a bond for life. Your analytic minds Will help you make good decisions Fair and just rewards will ensue. Your radiating hearts Will gift you many friendships Maybe special love All in good time. You will never be alone For you have a deep sense of self This will be fortified With my passing Your feet firmly planted Will serve you well Balancing the ups and downs because that's how life is. Always be true to yourself Life will be true to you too. Do not mourn my death I am not going far away. My illness has progressed My time is nigh There is a greater plan One we cannot see But we have had a great life As mother and daughters Our journeys together live on in our memories. My loves I will hold you safe In my heart Now and forever I will always be with you.
i prefer them bitten off =center (a slow lick on a hard knife edge) a shecat sparkling like pinwheels on the silky hilltops of waterbeds.. the ones that make you obsess -why they're one hour -five minutes late why their mascaras messy, making you waife their cologned necks, checking for that strange strong scent turn you into some kind of burning,paronoid jittery flake. i like'em a little mousy,a little off the beat a chick that can spit with class kick the living MAN outta me... A fireball that contorts and concocts, attends to every want and need... (ya know what i mean?) hum-ta-dum...ta-dum... ta-dee but in the end what I really need what we all need is periwinkle predicatability a crisco oiled apron the one mamma used to don a lullaby in the quiet cove of a racing mind reminding me of {dead} mother's... undivided attention... way back in Crayola Crayon time
These were all former PIMs -- "poetry in motion" entries I. desert stillness shrouds their adversary lairs twilight's muted thunder betrays the nearby stealthy moon II. pale gold ribbons fiery soft skies sea haze streaks a thin mountain path as day begins III. kitchen pans, pity, pungent cheese and garden lace -- the matriarch dripping decay with her mild gentility IV. winter snow, ice slow spring melt rain-drowned torrent ocean bound flow placid river drift debris of desire V. drifting memories of lakes water lapping against land heartbeats floating on the breeze the water reflects your face look away VI. the chalky moon creases midnight clouds blue shades of lovers walk a powdery sky chortle at the other's close proximity
Unwittingly sucked in entangled within lifes cobwebs poisoned wrapped and saved for later Until satisfaction for hunger is needed preyed upon with slow satisfaction and pride despite the deceit and trickery of enticement Faced with soulful persecution of honesty reality and truth to be lost forever whilst deceitful one is admired Displayed devouring of specimen No trial nor retribution, let others fall fate alas before finished – destiny will strike Poor black widow will choke own untimely death from own grip of life suffocating truths stifled now smothering
Brave Indian warrior Sitting alone in the woods In the soft glowing light Of a low hanging moon Shining on the mighty river Brave Indian warrior Playing the flute The forest comes alive Animals waking from slumber To hear his melancholy tune Brave Indian warrior Deep in thought The music lets him escape Taking his mind of things And focusing Brave Indian warrior Reflecting on the past Thinking of all he did All he could do All he should have done Brave Indian warrior All alone now Concentrating Drifting away Into exploration of the mind ~~Written By~Brittany Larson~ For Constance's contest ~"Tell His Story"
For Maxine Sister, was there forgiveness for she who bore you? For us, your siblings and sometime charges? For all who would not help, but hastened your demise? The marble coldness of your corpse, to my touch, is like an electric shock. The limbs, the torso, with sudden strangeness, now bear you slight resemblance. You feared all pain, but died without complaint. Who can fathom what you felt? Was there a last, sharp stab? A welcome to oblivion? Or even an awareness of your loss? Or was death no more spectacular than a tire deflating, slowly, quietly, unrecognized? And was that the shame of it? That your life ended, so early, so silently, and death was no extravaganza?
(African human populations are being killed off by war, famine, disease, and neglect...much like many rare other species...when will we pay attention and try to help them?) Time, stretching out, encompasses curtains, on distant savannas, of shimmering heat. And animals vanish: ibex and antelope; elephant; grouse. Here once, now going or gone. And time vanishes now. Animals gone, one has no focus. Moldering greenery, mute, moves mainly in wind -- pliant life, submitting to breezes, passive in sun. Rooted in spots not chosen or won. Plants do not vanish. They prosper. We do not prosper. We vanish, as animal, and go hardly noticed. A dirge, as animals vanish. We vanish unnoticed.
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````` Somewhere, there is a walled garden behind an iron gate, down at the end of a lonely road where many stones lie, side by side, etched deep with heartache, pain and years sharing the earth with dried-up tears ~ Where whimpering trees, brown grass, and weeds are thirsty in the breeze for recognition ~ Motes of dust glitter in sunlight fluttering between the falling leaves, reminding no one, of those who rest here ~ Where dust to dust ashes to ashes are old words carried away by the winds of time ~ Long are the old memories sleeping here, covered by moss and wet rusty leaves Shadowed by movements of each dwindling year ~ Yet, keeping a vigil, is the carving of stone Praying, and watching so they won't be alone One exquisite statue…with quietude's love Wings of an angel, that hovers above A carved granite angel silently gazing Like a mother, who watches over children who sleep She's biding to comfort gray shadows that weep Empty eyes staring, forever she keeps ```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
A certain kind of forever passed by today – It was coiled up and corked in a bottle, And as I watched it ride the ripples Of the clouds in dank sky, I sat in wonder – I thought about the gripping restlessness – That forever would eradicate, The funnel of emptiness Engorging my heart, That forever would calm – I contemplated, deliberated and toyed – With the notion of that forever, Out of grasp, out of reach Enlarging my need, Oh that timeless forever – I watched as that forever passed by – Caressed by the glass of antiquity, And as it rode out of sight Into sky's vastness, My wonder throbbed –
The Coke Makes The Vodka Smell Different, Tingles The Nose and Makes Me Feel Ensickened. Eighty Eight Tiny Hammers Striking String, Softening The Hit of The Liquids Infusing Nature. - What's Chicago Like? - Maybe One Day I'll Go There, Liquor Myself Into A Necessary Courage and Find The Elusive Amethyst. My Amethyst Amidst The Ashes, That's What I Called Her, The Perfect Mould For Every Future Entwinement. - And My Amethyst She'll Stay - Forever My Muse of Unbridled Perfection, The Chords She Created With Her Sweet Voice Were Raw and Beautiful. Her Voice, Seemingly an Allegory For Her Physique and Demeanor. Clumsy... But So Willing To Love. - The Ease of Creativity - My Beautiful Forgotten, How You Have Facilitated The Emptiness of This Man, My Lolita Incarnate. Your Nymphet Spark of Eccentricity, I Can Still Feel Your Heart Beating Against My Chest While I Sleep. - Chicago is The Center of My Hell - - A Hell I Should Make My Home -
Still, chimney birds emerge, cobweb-coated, darkly blithe -- to skim the sky's inverted bowls of purple porcelain and to utter their gray-tinged raucous cries at evening: a reprimand...and sorrow...
Grandfather I cry, I hold it in, I cry. I hate the way I saw you tonight, Wrapped up in wires, Sleeping beneath the shut off lights, But this is no sleep your in, Its just a moment before your passing. Oh Grandfather, I will forever hold the memory, Of slick juice upon my face, Sweet clementines dripping down my cheeks, And long stripped socks at Christmas. I will look back and dream, Of slim jims and chocolate milk, Sitting at the bar, The lights dimmed, And Barbie stamps covering my pale skin. When I was less than five years old. Oh Grandfather, I will never forget, Sitting on your black leather couch, And watching Mulan for the first time, Or the love and surprise I felt, When you bought it for me, Because I loved it so much. Oh Grandfather, I will always remember, Walking the small trail down from your house, To go look at your Harleys, And feed the little ducks, Crumbs of bread, Or a whole damn loaf if I really begged. Oh Grandfather, I will never forget the time, When you handed me one hundred bucks, Just for Graduating, not even at the top of my class. When I tried to return it, You insisted that you wanted me to keep it, And I cried, I hugged you hard and felt your love, Deep in the nether regions of my heart. Oh Grandfather, I will strive to remember, The smell of beer and whiskey and cigars on your breath, What a sweet smell that now seems, And oh how I wish, you would have stayed for that bottle of wine, Just stayed a little longer for all of your visits. Oh Grandfather, I will never forget how I felt when Grandma told me, You served in the marines, And I could not believe, That those Santa Clause eyes, Could be that strong and brutal, When you were always so nice, And I found for you a new respect. Oh Grandfather, I miss you so much, As you lay in your bed, Strung up with wires, and tubes and struggling, To find your last breath. Oh Grandfather, I am crying, I cant hold it in.
The phone rings innocently. Who is at the other side? Could be no one then yet a peculiar feeling tells me it is the bearer of bad news. Still I answer hoping I am wrong. My mother is ill, trapped between two worlds; the worlds of fear and courage. My ears hear every word but my mind has created a sudden barrier that nothing seems to penetrate like some sort of steel web of unwanted denial. Fear floods my body like a torrent river flow, eroding strength and stability. How much longer can I bare it? Never it seems but hope still glimmers regardless of how dim. Miles are between us, I feel numb and unexpectedly lost. Where am I? It's certainly not here in the presence of fallen angels. The bell of hope strikes a sharp note creating a gentle chime awaking my senses to the news, they are sharpened making the fear of loss suddenly commanding, corrupting my inner strength making it weak. I continue to listen all the while my body is screaming in protest. The voice stopped, I hung up, the pain and fear never lessened. Time went by all the while my mind was constantly in a state of anguish and grief. Endless stories were created, each one worse than the last. My family begun to shatter like a broken mirror, reflecting only the scars of misery and needless hurt. Hope still glimmered but appeared distant and out of reach. My mind grew tender, endless misery has eaten away at my last thoughts of happiness. The sting of fear created heartache for the bond between mother and child was nearly severed, severed by the hands of an unwanted deity. A deity of life itself.
Where once we laughed, bent over our middles, pounding the table, or just smirking with a rueful "Oh, my God", sort of way, could I forget the silent beach? Rustles of sand at my window as you walk off hands in your pockets after our gazes met one last time as you checked I remained alive and you had no duty to fill any more. How could the sand slither so beneath our feet, like an upturned timer wiping clean wiping, wiping away our faces, our moisture, until only the rollers were brave enough to face me and the sand and the laughter and the quiet and what had passed away never to return again. Never the same river or ocean or hands awaiting the clock of our unmaking until your rueful smile no longer smirks at the me that was never there in your dreaming, and I am made who I am again. Real. Sheri Fresonke Harper
There I was, for the second night, visiting you. It's that time of the year again where graves don't seem so lonely, all lit up with flames, flowers and faces I find it so beautiful, Undas... We all might be contained within our own circles, but thoughts and feelings are somehow linked— similar in remembrance of what was lost, of what is loved. This time always reminds me of regret. Oh yes, my sighs are so pregnant with them, giving birth to a nursery full of wailing cry babies. Death. Of someone, of something. Of anything. How final it seems. So much lost, so much taken. Then the operative word, "seems", jumps out at me. I am reminded of grass razed by fire, seemingly dead—hopeless. Brown, dried, burnt. Some might leave it be and move on with their lives. But some might dig beneath the dirt, dust it off, then they might find hope. The roots are still there, alive. A second chance to make things right. To nurture it better this time around. Maybe, this is why I cling so hard to the thought of an afterlife. Why so many people do. I don't want to think of death as The End. You've graced my life, our lives with so much and I still catch myself seeing you in other people. In this manner, you are still very much alive. This is also why I kiss the day that you were born. You were given to us, albeit for a short while but you are still here in some other ways, and I am thankful for that. I light one of your candles, whisper my prayers, and something touches past my right hand. (Ah, I've always felt that certain emptiness with that hand.) I see what it is, and it embraces my heart. It is small yet so profound for me. A white butterfly. Choosing that moment to flutter past me, touching me in that darkness. It lands on one of the leaves of your floral arrangement and stays there with me. 11012012121p217r ** For my brother, & to all my loved ones who have gone on. I also want to dedicate this to all who have lost their loved ones, either recently or long ago—the void will always be there, but the memories & love that they have given us will never be forgotten in our hearts. Undas is a yearly tradition here, where most Filipinos flock to the cemeteries to visit their dead. Ok, I will not rule out that some go there not exactly to visit the dead but to join in the hmm, festivities (if walking through cemeteries is your thing), being with friends, eating, since of course there are lots of food stalls present during this time.
Gray leaden murkiness rests in the light hours For which there was no light Their barren lifelessness was visible, as their arms wobbled Cracked and scorn beaten down Dry as the desert, the tears have bleed away Sucked out and left to wander And so they have lost against the truculent world Numb, inept and ossified spirits Crushed like pellets of a beautiful rose Torn from their stem of the pulse Slowly evaporating into a dull colorless dust No longer of value for they have shed there hold to dwell
[The Puppeteer] The storm I see you in Caught in the race of Caïn Held by the arms you cannot see--the conducter of Ennui -No stronger than the void you hold within- It began with a hope, an obsession Casted into, slavery of repugnant possessions Granted by, the Avaricious Lords, the ones we serve for -They Told Us to pray, hope, away from despair, the despair caused by their immaculate Hands Malice, envy, greed, was granted to me, The Feudal Dream, we want to be Them, just like him -just how he solaces us, ambivalent hope, engendering knives to my throat [The Fall] In this Valley of morning and weeping Love lies bleeding, in desperate fear With their talons, the hunt to rip out thy heart As each velvet petal falls apart Her body chained in their bile and lies, covered with their red-spy -sent just to check if our souls are in line, do not defy Her blood velvet and pure, drips away with innocence of the amber guardian The soil of plagues, beggars, and graves Is know her home, the coven of solace Though the seed has died--resurrection Is near passing through death's fear One stronger than you--and thy funeral skies She is alive--anew But the vapors still remain The Apocalypse is here, do we fear? Just for the death of our sins Elysia never Seemed so far away [Our Damnation] Solitary ruins, Fulfill their visions We strayed far from the depths within We all lingered to his solace--lies -you make the sign everyday, but lack toknow the name We are just the toys, he pulls all of the strings We are nothing in this burning world of Decadence, and Failed Semblance [Draconian] Draconian--Reach for the shadows within Draconian--Break from the Fallen's son Draconian--Their empirical lies, only die Draconian--Reach the shadows within
I was crying tonight I thought I had survived the pain I know I was lying to myself Holding back the tears Pretending that life had moved on That I had moved on As the the night drifted to dawn I found so much missing Then I pictured him The image was so clear My mind wandered back to the nights we shared I felt his hand upon my skin I saw the reflection of the moon in his eyes I felt the happiness that lived in each moment With him I felt whole My life complete Without him Emptiness engulfs me Sadness overwhelms me I am lonely Not for my lover Not for companionship Not for the man For my best friend I am lost I look around and realize This is not where I belong This is not where I should be This is where I stay I ask myself why I stay And though I can make a list of reasons They are all excuses Words that mask the fear The fear of failure Fear of more heartbreak I know how disappointed in me he would be And that is why I cry Copyright © 2009 Lena "Lolita" Townsend
Today I decided To bring company To my mandatory session Of therapy I hope this poem Doesn't offend Anybody who decides They want to read This topic may be a bit Touchy or confusing to some Who like to sit and pretend Or play dumb What if you have never Had control over loosing Your virginity What about the girls Who had it taken unwillingly What about the chesters Who plot times and wait And resolve to touch And never penetrate Should a girl call herself A virgin Even if she doesn't feel like She still has her virginity What about the boys Who swear in secrecy To the archdiocese and priestly men What about the girls Who are sold into sexual Slavery What about the family friends Who take prizes from children Too costly for them What about the moms That remember in infancy The horrible atrocities to great to tell Of things that happened To their precious baby girls Someone needs to invent A new definition For virginity
Sometimes you must take a second look. What you might've seen may have been written in a book. The memories, the truths. The starlight, the booth. We took pictures of that day. That day we were okay. But today is anew. Everything we've been through. Thrown away like a wrapper. Blown up like a sapper. Every thing you've said a lie. The lies flown into my very own eye. One day I will, we will all die. Don't cry. Flourish the past. Embrace the future. The world keeps turning. The sun keeps burning. Whether you're there or not. Look at what you've got. Money is just a virtue. That you should've knew. What do you have when the world keeps turning? What do you know when the sun keeps burning? All gone. All gone. Have you enjoyed your life? Did you apologize to your wife? Did you say I love you to your kids? I mean god forbid. Goodbye. Goodbye. My friend goodbye. It's been a nice trip. I'm sorry you had to slip...Away..
Empty lockets dangle softly from crooked necks-- dappled granite faces west where the sun sleeps-- whispered prayers linger quietly as a child weeps.
Hidden Treasure Hidden, locked away A last resort A compromise When your well has gone dry You search endlessly for me Certain that my presence Always awaits your lonely soul Underneath your dreamscape Here I remain Your reality I will be your mirror When delusions are before you For you I bear this cross Because my heart beats for you Just a memory to you so often Your buried treasure lies here Waiting to be discovered © 2008 Courtney Dyer
Stand I here upon the Precipice of Time between madness and derangement- In a grief so profound ambiance of rage, with darkening clouds abound marring my every breath Declaration to your joy unsound. Yet- from this stance I envision you, my perfect seraphim of light- aching for you Ceaselessly grasping for that which I have no chance. Grasping – bent in half weeping- My corrupt nature defies All I hold sacred and true- You need know My soul rages in disparity- Immortally, hourly, minutely, secondly… ETERNALLY- I cry. The Dragon's shadow awaits me. Shapes, wraithlike and laughing- clawing… dragging…shadows eerily baffling. Veiled obscurity- most refuse to see This sickening reality Tis only righteous- to set you free… Paled I am by another's word- his creed, I allowed this blasphemy Unable, enable, culpable- Guilty, frailty, unreality, liable. Covet, yearn, anticipation- keen ambition overshadows any austere regulation- We two do stand upon this Precipice of time My love stands as most depraved of crimes- Stolen and deceived- Options extinct Surrender is an unnatural ailment for me. - dedicated to my Seraphim
red streaks run along the edges of the white petals like the ones that run down her arms trickling slowly down the stem and to the floor like the tears she sheds every second of the day the red stains upon the leaves unwashed the red stains upon her fingers untouched red stained carpet and red stained cloths a jacket worn at all times a black jacket covering the scars red puddles left behind and a bleeding rose
My tusks are sharp, like a warrior's spear. I see clearly and only feel one thing, fear. Frozen deep in this field of flattened glass, I had to watch my unfulfilled dreams pass. I have always known the snow covered land that now morphs and changes behind my own, Innocent eyes. But a weight of a stone, that can crush an entire army; then I remain alone. I feel cold, my spirit sold, lurking beyond me, rotten and old. Out of reach, with so much to teach, jerking to become free, begging for speech, my young ones, my family shadows, trapped behind a glacier of gallows, The temporary apocalypse of merciless ice. I wish I had warned them. -Caroline Youngless
As the world continues, the stories continue to unfold, my heart breaks, though I find peace within. As another unknown soul comes to an end, an unnoticed tragedy occurs, while the rest of the world moves on, tears take control. It's a beautiful curse, empathy for the unknown, tears falling because no one else will. It seems if a heart beat ends, another person becomes a victim, the youngest to the oldest are mourned for inside. Though none of it makes sense, and unnecessary tears can be a curse, ultimately it's a beauty I've learned to hide, it's a secret, a beautiful curse that can not be denied.
We exchanged harsh words Harsh words over nothing, nothing at all Harsh words over something long forgotten Harsh words which are so critical so critical now to recall and to relive over and over again… You were ready to drop the matter You were ready to relent and apologize I was not ready to drop the matter I was not ready to relent and apologize You were the adult, I was the child I reversed the roles, you reversed them back You offered your hand, I refused your hand I refused and let you walk out that door Yes, I let you walk out that door That front door, that door to forever the last time I didn't talk to you the last time I didn't say I love you the last time I saw you the last time I saw you alive…
If it's that easy to lose you… then go People always leave, trust no one even yourself I love myself for losing you You can't deny the fatal truth.. I don't love you I'll never regret the decision to lose you My soul won't rest until I forget you The longer I live the lesser my heart beats for you You've decided to leave me, I've decided to hate you People pretend to love you, turn your back They wish you to disappear In my life I trust no one, cause this life is based on lying I never thought that I would cry when you leave My heart was strong when you were around But since you left it weakens by the moment You made my world rain with sadness What's the meaning of friendship if eventually they'll leave? I live in a world full of sadness, so why should I be happy?? I'd wish to die than seeing you leaving I'd wish to die than living like this I wish to be hopeless, cause I suffer when I hope that you'll come back I'd wish to be blind than seeing you leaving I'd wish to be deaf than hearing you cry I wish I had no tongue to taste the bitterness of loneliness My middle name is misery My first name is hopeless My last name is treachery I thought it was a dream come true meeting you But no it's not a dream, it's my personal hell My blood is cold, my heart is stone My veins are crumpled, my soul is crushed My life is gone with you I can't eat, I can't drink I can't see, I can't hear I can't talk, I can't walk I can't live my miserable life I see another girl, I feel nothing for her Where are my feelings? They're gone with you I'm just like a rolling stone You were my twilight, now darkness followed your absence And everything is dark I'm lost, I can't find my way I'm lost in this place, and this place is my life Just save me from my misery Just let me fade away My breath is taken And my heart stopped beating My heart is cut in splits No wonder why its so cold Cause your still here I'm running out of choices I'm running out of clues There's nothing I can do to make this go away You are like a scar in my heart, that's tearing me apart
I sit here quiet in my room. I want to take a bite out of life and leave a mark. But my teeth aren't Sharp enough for my appetite. I want the wet mark left on my neck to remind me someone noticed my footsteps. I want to dance to the moonlight's favorite song. I want to sing to the stars. I want to listen while the sun talks to me. I want to be brave when fear has no excuse. I want to be your shelter when it starts to drizzle. I want to love you when you think no one is there. I want to be your pillow when your head is heavy. I want to be your moment when you feel my pain. I want to be!!!!!!!
Not long before I put down my dirt filled hoe Into my yard she quietly crept It's as though she knew I needed her cheer She was rust colored and sadly matted cat Not the most attractive feline I'd ever seen But she was lonely and hungry, and in need Of course immediately my Mothering instinct beckoned She followed me to where I poured some milk for her Not ever having a cat I didn't have cat food on hand- So I opened a can of tuna to her delight She lapped it up and looked up at me with a smile The next day there she was waiting and the day after and so on I had found a friend So I went out and bought some cats food She was now mine of at least I thought so Who could have ever done such a thing? Leaving her to the streets? I bought her flea collar and bells to wear Soon she would just sit on my lounge chair waiting for me I had to bring her into the house she still looked so frail One day while she was eating I noticed her choking on her food It continued so I made an appointment to see the vet It had to be done anyway after all she was to be mine While we had our visit and the saddest moment of my life came The doctor said she had throat cancer and it was advanced Our friend Tabby didn't but a few weeks to live So my husband and I made the pain staking decision To put her to sleep Tears poured from every corner of my eyes "No" was all I screamed inside she had brightened my life How could someone have left her alone? The Vet felt the previous owner knew about her condition They left her to suffer knowing she was so sick I felt we at least gave her 6 weeks of love and care before she left this place I will never forget the love and championship this rusty feline gave me Months later my family and I adopted another cat Tabby showed us- The greatest love and companionship that animals give you unconditional We now have two wonderful cats that were adopted They bring so much to our lives
It was always an ugly robe from the first stitch through every seam of its existence The background color a bold red of cinnamon and cayenne meeting in a frenzy Blue tulips frazzled and frayed as though from an acid trip lingering too long Yellow and green prancing poppies stared from only one eye blackened by an attempt to escape the garish landscape of the robe finished quaintly kimono style I told her when she created it that it was horrid and thank goodness she would not be wearing it in public But my mother had her own sense of comfort and style and who was I to criticize I was just her thirty-something year old child She loved it and made it to please HER Four years later the robe looking slightly worn and fraying lay across the foot of her bed where she lay dying It had warmed her body through cold Midwest winters for too few years Now it warms my body and keeps her near Seventeen years later the poor robe is frazzled ratty and worn The belt disintegrated long ago Replaced by a dark green sash for studied contrast I think she rubbed off on me A hole is melted over the right side cheek where I backed into a wood stove seeking heat Seams are exposed The hem now frayed One sleeve is torn But I am not ready to give up the robe I may never be ready to put it to rest I've found a strange beauty in the twisted tulips and cyclops poppies which cannot be found anywhere else And I swear after all these years her fragrance from four-years worn lingers lovingly once again in my heart
How little the clouds think when they glow white forming shapes tossing about when filled with moisture oh how grey they will be until they shed themselves of this heaviness like a heart in love skips a beat but when broken you can literally drown you see Then those tears oh how they flow how is it possible to love someone so and they think of you as the lowest of low others say they have loved many and the feeling soon goes I want to ask them; are you sure you were truly in love because I would have no time in my life to do this over and over again It is there trapped inside of me no matter what they do or how little they show I still love them with everything I am and know oh sure I have loved and do love they come and they go but I find it impossible for someone to move on if they have been in love with their true soul it is different and as those heavy grey clouds fills so full and sometimes it has to just explode shedding tears of what it has found oceans, lakes, streams, and creeks were formed all because a cloud was filled with all that is moist My heart is full of love and when they need me I come forth but all through the day it is that one I think of if only they could see this or that joy how I wish they were here for more than myself I would love to give them all of this love until then I am a heavy cloud waiting to explode knowing they will never come but even though they let me go it is them I love my five senses I wait to share in joy to grow old loving life in their arms instead of always patching up this arc in my flood Bear with me, I am having a life change and caught up in it. Thank you to whomever helped get my other poem featured. I was very excited to see my name. lol The poem was an emotional one however. lol The truth but very emotional, as you see I am emotional on everything. lol So thanks, and please don't be too hard on me. :D
It was a home on the river we lived . It was the ghost of a young man whom had taken his own life. I still remember the vision of him walking by me with a blank stare We, as a Family of seven , moved into this river house Panoramic views right out to the river , I should mention I was home alone as a child , looking out at "The Julia Belle Swan " as she went by . Upstairs in that room as I saw a figure walking by , with very nice features , auburn hair I thought he was my older brother , a handsome young guy Then I realized the young man was not my brother , a apparition he appeared . He was not there to scare or frighten , the message I believe he wanted to shed light on, so clear. He walked right by ,then disappeared through the window, out to the River . The Ghost knew I could see him , a gift I have been given when I was a younger child of five , I had once died for a short time. I was lifted by Jesus in Heaven . Death is not for us to decide . Later in the years we moved from that home , every home we lived in had a story or a presence of its own . My Mother had told me later , a young man took his life there . Keep fighting your way through life and its despair , you are important to someone whom cares . If you feel alone and want life to end , Please pick up the phone , call anyone , call for help , call a Friend . "This is not fiction , it truly is a gift I have been given "
Running, after more than you, can hold. Taking, someone else's love, and leaving. Children are fearful of what they're told. Can't you see I'm the one who's freezing? I was just a child with a trinket Never knowing that it'd be, more to me When you were gone to, too far, from me. Steady with your hands close to my heart Never letting our world's tear us apart I know, your icicles I miss the beaches that we played on You missed the child in your own eyes Now you're gone, But I'm still not here. Why can't you wake up I'm not ready Please, just take your time, don't leave now I can't fight this world alone.
Hear the Lion roar above the rapids Hear that Lion roar; But what if this Lion would roar no more? And nothing was left for him to roar for. His home is gone; His land been taken; His children ran; His life forsaken; And though the Lion may roar above the rapids; That will be the last we'll see For if you can not be happy then why bother being free?
Love is not easy Love is hard Love is time apart Trying not to drown Praying to stay loyal Holding on to lover's promises Dreaming of reuniting Crying tears of hurt and joy Thinking of you constantly Asking God for all the best Love is difficult Love is not easy Love is hard Love is faith Love is hope Love is trust But love is beautiful Oh, so beautiful And love is worth it Oh, so worth it Love is in God's Hands Love is protected Love will come back again Reunion again For God is love In Jesus' Name We pray Amen!
They say it was quick, her passing, but he knows better, his young daughter was never one to be rushed, toddled in adolescence, dallied with mollycoddling. They say she didn't suffer, died instantly, but he knows better for her presence lingers between door and stair at each gloaming; despair has claimed the echo of a home. They say it is a rare occurrence, But he kows better because she lived her life that way, each moment serendipitous, as though moths and clouds were extraordinary. They say that her brain bled, an injury, But he knows better, it was his world that drained out instead and he searches spotless floorboards for one trace of red. They say life goes on, loss will lessen, but he knows better as he ages, terminally, grief lurks like a ghost that only he sees. *Dedicated to the friend of a friend, whose daughter died suddenly due to a subarachnoid hemorrhage after a soccer game. There was no warning. She collapsed in her father's arms at the foot of their staircase. Somehow this painting reminded me of his sorrow, the unfathomable loss he bears.
Drowning in the pool of anguish…oh…oh… I'm venturing into the forest…and I want to hear the words seep out Release these aching sorrows…I worry my soul's drying out… like a drought… Drain out the fluids from my heart It's gouging me…bruising me to the core… **chorus** Embrace the light…embrace the midnight sky… You fall in my arms – you die so warm Shed me more sun to lift up my spirits From the…underground…and release me – I'm breathless I'm drowning in doubt…ooh… oh… Remember me…I'm falling…into my swirling fate…hanging on the roots Strangling my heart…distorting in my veins… I'm bleeding so softly – cut out the wood… Splintering me…I'm shattering… and I'm falling in the abyss Bring me more radiance from my candle light Warp me up in bliss…don't let the midnight sky…don't take away my delight From the…ocean…and save me—save me…oh… oh… I'm failing *chorus* I'm drowning in regret…ooh..oh… Hit the bull's eye in my heart…embrace the light And don't leave me hanging in the abyss…hand me a kite! Save me before I fall apart…shut out the night And don't let the dusk escape us… I must confess… I must confess… I hate to see you abandon the light… But I'm not the one to save you from the night Ooh…ohh… *Chorus* Splintering lies fill your heart I want to kiss it goodbye… But you've mastered it like a piece of art I want to kiss the abyss and die… Dry… I wanna touch the sky with my whole soul But I'm failing and the end of time has taken its toll Tainted sorrow…swims around me…I dwell where the waters depart But the anguish still swarms in my heart… I'm failing…my heart stops beating And my desires are fleeting From my grasp And the monsters laugh at me…as I fall… *chorus* Embrace the midnight sky…catch me…catch me… As I fall in death's arms…I die so cold And your heart is made of gold Untangle the darkness & take away the nightmares Answer our prayers & block out the night Erase the heartaches & wipe away our tears Unravel Your words of life & delight
Where have all the cabooses gone, Red slab sided, cupola, curved roof, Friendly stove pipe hat, every kids wish, Moveable tree house clickety-clacking Cozily rolling across America Snappy visored cap, brass buttons Blue coat, wind whipped leaning out One hand on the stanchion Waving an all clear lantern, nights shining arc Then crack, all along the line each Snapping to attention each car in its turn With a rattle rattle, huff and puff Away it roars into childhood. A memory of something important, Those years gone like borrowed money And now the dollars have all been spent But the secret stays in the heart An ancient fondness now focused A connection across the years Tears and a smile for that railroad boy
After Derek Walcott's Poem We have this in common Sandy spit Empty hours to walk alone Needing to find use For the forgotten In the eyes of other people Washed up Softens all tones To sandblasted blue glass Eyes, drawn out toward sky The driftwood branch has stars Or rafts toward uncertain lands Toward a fire pit nest where paper cups makes castles and feathers, a reedy sail for those whose wings have fluttered far and long and settled down on a temporary, final beach.
You are good for me My baby I am you, but the you just never ends Looking down the puddle of muddy water I see your troubled face Instead of me, I tried to save you I fly up to the sky and I am surrounded By beauty, beautiful clouds and the blue Snugly and warm in knowing I am looking at you Inside I am dying but in my eyes I am living Your soul took flight long ago But it has not abandoned me I am racing to catch you And I am very close You may be not inside me But you are everywhere
You were supposed to be my first best friend We were to look out for one another I tried to always be there when things got rough And though we grew up in the same home You took a path separate from mine We spoke less and less over the years I tried to extend a hand and do what was right But I lost you my sister and my first best friend
Ignore me...Why? "You're a LOSER thats why!" You Hate me, What did I do? "Why else, you are you!" What is that supposed to mean "Figure it out, you'll never win," I said I was sorry, What more do you want? "You ARE sorry, Pathetic, a Dork and a runt." Is there anything I could do to change your mind? "I want you leave, what are you blind?" Fine then I'll go, but I want you to know, I'm sorry for the things that I've said and I've done, I'm sorry for the feelings, the love I didn't show... And the boy turned away, down the track where they run, And ended his life...with the shot of a gun. And when the girl heard, she uttered not a word, For to miss him, to care, or feel sorrow, well, that would be absurd...
A single kiss from thy lovely lips, so sweet and so divine, yet I taste posion upon your tongue. Your beauty so glorious, like a blooming rose so beautiful, yet, why do mine eyes go blind in the sight that you walk along with another? Yes you, walk with another, arm under arm, lips touching lips in romantic kisses, it makes my blood boil, for mine lips are dry. For mine eyes have seen your glory, yet no one here listens to my story. You are evil, yes you are, don't try to deny, Listen to a man of experience, you might as well save some expense. I write of our long romantic walks we took together, under the shade of olive trees, how we went apple picking in autumn time, and made love in the foyer. Nomore of that sweet and passionate love, nomore silent kisses in the night, when the wind blows hard against the branches, that tape violently on my windowpane. Nomore somber tears shed, when you got sick, and nomore warm embraces when you shed tears of betrayal. Betrayal now is a game played by a fool, such as I, to think I'd have a happy life with you? Huh, only a fool would think such a thing, but now I sit, looking at the foyer, where we once made sweet, passionate love, nomore will that foyer be filled with exotic pleasure. Nomore will you be filled with smiles and exotic pleasure. I've done my job, as a good man shall do, now pack your things and get of my stage, the spotlight yawns for anew, and the audience grows tired and restless of you. Now I live life anew, you too shall see life in new eyes, walking hand and hand with the blond, blue eyed devil you call your own. Shall he take one kiss from your lips, and die of the posion he tastes on your tongue, shall he go blind, when he sees your true, black beauty? He will see the ugly soul, covered up by white rags, and cheap makeup, and then he will come to me, and shake my hand in condolence and say, "You were right!" Now you are all alone, looking for another, as you did many times before, Now you are alone, walking an open road, spying on another, fear of being alone. Now, you see when you play games with a good man's emotions, don't try it, because a good man is not meant to be toyed with.
Random thoughts of you run randomly throughout my mind, as I hold, looking through a simple picture of you and I, smiles and holding each other, embracing warmth brings me to sanity, watching your hand on my forearm, as you gaze into my eyes. Oh the tears flood such emotion, only you and I now in such madness we call love, such madness we all call life, such madness we all call reality. Thoughts of me without you, I cannot bear to see such a sight in mind, to hear such words that tear my heart out and sadness stabs me rapidly in the back, and I can't bear to see such a sight as this. Thoughts of you running randomly throughout my mind, my hair turns silver and white with stress of not being with you, and my liver covered with cancer, and lungs black with smoke, and stomach embraced with ulcers. All I ask for you, is not to be a thought anymore, and come back to me in flesh and bone in a portrait painting of you in reality come to me with your beauty and glory and kind heart and hold me again, and let me kiss you again and love you again, and call you mine again. Don't say it is impossible, when you know and I know, that it is in fact possible to love each other once again.
When did man become sick? Besmirched with the sin of greed, Fortified to kill his brother in fear of losing his pride, When did man become revolted by the color of skin? And the gift of a child became a burden, When did man's knowledge become dangerous? And the power the change the world meant to lose the world When did man stop his compassion for nature? And allowed for it to be destroyed by fire without remorse, When did man become blind? And his ignorance became his bliss. When did man forget God?
WHISPER'S April rain fell like whispers on grass, Soft and light like a half felt apology. Dark clouds wafted overhead in shamed silence. Distressed by a cold winter's return. Daffodils wept and bowed in fading despair, My Father's favourite plant was slipping away. As my Father had done and now my Mother too Lost to a world of cold whispers and sorrow. Dead flowers I had placed on their grave so light Were fading like a memory, a star un-bright. Still the rain whispered but failed to cleanse, The grit of sorrow that inhabits my heart.
Technological age. Advancement of advancement, Digital acceleration unlimited. Gifted and pocketed, This watch, Dull dark silver, True and tested mechanic, Short and sturdy chain, Analogue accuracy. It fits comfortably in my jeans pocket, Ages alongside my creasing lines with wear marks, Time isn't well kept with its adolescent sporadic tock, Certain to be set to be kept at a minute ahead, I am directed to watch this future unfold, While it clings to my pocket lining and present time, And the engravings pull me back to the past, You told me not to let this time pass me by, As you held me tight before you passed me by, And I never kept very good time like this Fresh watch that sticks close to my side, I cannot say that you were lost, For the path you had set was more set than stone, No improper implication should be allowed, The wallowing whispers that beg me every which way, They told me to go away from the very place That I had interest to stay and investigate, The stars sway with no stationary complaint, Our night sky that's not so city bright, Contains a dim white plate in-between its phase, Much like my pocket of space it hangs, A witless glow behind the cloudy night. I am no more than I was except for a simple realization, To look back and find I am not the same as I was, Commonly known as growing up and moving on, But I know I'll be happy in just a few short years, Just glad I am not the same as I am now.
Mom, there is something I have to tell you about dad, he comes in to my room at night, we play this game' it's just between 'us' he said then he leaves and goes to bed. I know you won't believe me but it's true, please don't be mad at me,' the girl said. 'You are a 'liar' her mom screamed now get out of my face and get to bed. Late, that night on the nightly news they reported about 'a little girl who had been killed from being beaten black and blue by her parents, the girls mom was 'apalled'. Her mom said 'how could any parent do that to their own kid'!? The girl sat confused, she had just told mom about what her dad did and her mom called her a 'liar' it's just 'denial is so easy'.
The mourning sun struggled to shine over the good earth longing for uprooted seeds, O-Lan's second bamboo shoot harvested far too soon. The eighth page of my American newspaper casually mentions Sixty Million Missing, as is our rage. Silent choruses of Asia's daughters during this thirty-year long monsoon of tears cry out in unison: Was gender our only crime, or was it the cruelty of order? (to form an even more perfect union, one child-no second chance, second child-no first chance.) Inhuman actuaries compute the fair market value of rare Punjabi jewels as the opportunity cost of their ultimate dowries, while surplus men pine. O blind new world proud of its amniotic intelligence, so unaware of the consequences of unnatural selection, last night I dreamt Heaven's narrow gates welcoming millions scarcely born, its vast expanse unable to contain our aggregate guilt, the billions of us who remain.
or do you want to tell the person whose first name is sang by sinead o connor middle name is sang by fred durst and last name is mentioned by fred durst do you want to tell me, the person you just spent 13 years mad at singing and dancing to my misfortune and rubbing your happiness in my face as you exclude me from sex do you want to tell that person whose name you plastered all over your war that he had nothing to do with surviving it do you want to tell that man Troy Jeremy Nelson who just lost everything 17 times to start over that he was not your allie in whatever that was? let me put your name alll over a war and then wait for your enemy to show up and ask you what does that guy got that i don't? everything now you murdered my grandpa you murdered my friends you murdered my sex life and you sang and danced to my misfortune to the tune of your lies pretending i was your friend called an alibi you didnt bother to even try to keep alive do you want to come telll me Troy Jeremy Nelson that your country just did that too that thats not what happened? Im not sure how long your going to live that lie the thousands of people concerned and involved in that persons endless and i mean endless nightmare might just come tell you what has been making them cry..... Happy Halloween tho FALSE PROPHET oh and p.s. next time you put somebody else in the middle of your war to play the victom of that person's nightmare you caused take notes to pass into the future as to what is about to occur to you may be a life lesson to history Thank you for not caring (sarcasm) thank you for not answering my letters (sarcasm) thanks for going the wrong way, in the wrong direction, to do the wrong thing that whole time i kept pointing out a drug ring blackmarket, you people didnt care about (sarcasm) thanks for calling me a liar as to what has taken place in my life(sarcasm) so whenever you are free to hand me a bunch of things with your smiling face, and names all over them to make me feel better for the way you treated me singing and dancing to the sound of getting away with murder for the miracles youve stolen my big brother doesn't like to dance around and play house, pretending to be someone hes not in a singing competition, racing against his sense of fear do you want to come tell the man just tortured by malpractice with his name on your war in your music, he had nothing to do with winning it?
Meddlesome acknowledgement was my gift to many I wondered where the nutrients were coming from I was absorbing your words, parched by my own dimming light-years There I was stunned by the legion of black-faced martyrs Exasperation of the undeniable misunderstanding of every conceivable word Left me with another path onto death And not nearly dying, but regenerating in technological, factorial woe Demon thoughts squeezed bile from the brim of subconscious drivel Accelerating the ghouls from the gull of my esophagus I was held down from the dreams of the fortnight From words of architecture ascending from the brims of the archangels Eyes remained closed And I felt the actual descent of my downfall I did not open my eyes at all I did not mean to pry into your life, oh beautiful soul Please accept my gift today My fierce gaze into your lavishing grail Led me to accept and love where I often fail I am no longer smothered in your intricate designs Though I am surely small to you Though I feel only a fraction of a fool I am the hidden spark under the timbers of lies I am the hidden spark under the timbers of lies
The sound of drums has halted Canoes traded for cars No one left to tell of the bear. Billboards cover the landscape Is this progress? Is this what you seen in your mind's eye? Who will teach your ancestral tongue? Let your drums beat once again. Written for Debbie Guzzi's any Eight Line Contest I chose to write about the loss of our first Nation people's culture. This loss took place as a result of Residential school system and at the hands of people who abused their children. Buckets of money will not compensate for the loss of culture and sense of community. The wealth is being concentrated in the hands of a few people while Many members of their communities live in Third World Conditions.
On the edge of metropolitan midnight he lays in a breathless silence rasping the evanescing yesterdays to his windows both open and locked, while the unknowing below in stale smoke barrooms, wait to sear his wounds and retell his life in putrefied requiem. Abashed metropolis echoing of muted voices once adorning the streets in practiced synthetic ritual, the vile awash and seeping through asphalt cracks, the scent of rot, old and new, smattered on old brick edifices silences the ascending smoke plumes belched from and within dirtied concrete towers, the final endeavor from within a dying mans spirit reaching out to no one City's voice wails from the antechamber in darkness anxieties fracturing the panes amongst the downtown fire of urban panic lucidity congealing away within him, kept only in the moment by metronome dripped medicine exposing him to his damp streets, dirtied culverts, sewer ditches chemically induced and maintained. Fighting for his identity within this sterilized chaos, whispering for the few of open mind somewhere below the window sill, quicky stepping onward, over his newsprint life, calling out one last time There he lays in cold white sterility, calling silently to his windows, both opened and locked, watching his stories catch and fade in the dull humid streetlight wisped away on steam grate stale winds, the dying soul, eyes closed, his aged lined face muddied, scraped, and walked over, through the grime of progression left on sullied pavement.
"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love." – Washington Irving strongest love known conveyed by tears, not words powerful the person allowing tears to escape walls that hold a captive heart essence of true compassion sharing sacred tears as a loved one mourns *Entry for Russell Sivey's "Challenge - 8 Lines Max" contest by Carolyn Devonshire, October 9, 2011 Dedicated to Joyce Johnson on the loss of her brother
It is I, Only able to Sit before The mischievous screen Of the TV And watch Palestine, my country, Fall like a Corpse On cold land It is I, Deemed To observe The homes and Lives of my Brothers and sisters Turn into ashes On an embellished LG Flat-screen It is I, Spotting on the news The olive trees of a Palestinian fertile Field flame Into barren barks Of nothingness It is I, Viewing the Tanks and Weaponed metal Turn audacious Rock-throwers Into heroic martyrs While changing Some channels It is I, My generous name is, A Palestinian simply Deprived of Setting a foot into Palestine.
Oh John! My John! How my heart longs to see your kind eyes to look upon that boyish smile to hear that booming laugh I yearn to have your body next to mine to feel the comfort of your loving embrace to have your strong arms wrapped around me to hear the sound of your reassuring voice Like the scent of you in our home, the pain of your loss still lingers My heart will always ache for you for our love was without boundaries. Oh Mary! My Mary! How I wish I could be there to touch your beautiful face to wipe away all your tears to erase your every fear I wish I had the chance to tell you how much I love you to kiss you as if I knew it were the last To wrap you in my arms like never before I would walk away from heaven's gate, just to gaze at your lovely face and lock you in a never-ending embrace My Love! My Mary!
Whole night you were in my musing Everything forgets except your face Today I'm late at bed No one to wake me early When i saw you in far Corner of dry, dark sky My heart gets torn, Eyes can't stop flowing We are missing you "Mom"... He left the world you leave Don't talk, Rough movement and even His smiles erased. Still waiting for you every eve at the gate The old breezed love Can't take the pain. My small brother asks me When you will come? Your daughter loss All her faith and joy. I can't see their faces It's remind me you, Your love Babbling Chattering before bed to rig up mosquito-curtain Run after me while going to work! My heart seems to burst And blow up with grief... I miss you at my every step,"Mom" He was empty before you Again fall into nothingness They lost their playmate I lost my best friend ! Nobody forbids me, No one says don't do this The call from back to return soon is vanished Sometimes i feel so lonely, My soul intends to cries out Like a simple child And pray to you,"Please come back Mom" If not possible to punish me Make me cry once ! Aaborta Dey This poem is based on death of one of my friend's Mom and i feel more love to my parents when i read this.
This tear So tightly held these salty tears so tight my eyes squeeze embracing the We like long lost love and yet you fall, fall with a weight of remembrance returning to the earth of cares sinking in a fathomless lake of woe moistening it without glaze. This tear Flicked freely from the corner of mother's eye dropping with pointed precision upon pearl white cheek flying momentarily... or running childishly from the tip on the fingertips of joy beside a chocolate brown nose. Or in gasps of anguish too great for arms to hold Circles the world with the bounty of heart… When released from imprisoned chest bodes more than woe. This tear defines the humanity of man. Poet: Debbie Guzzi Contest: Personify a Tear * Do to the 12 line requirement this verse has been altered to be read both left to right and from top to bottom.
Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION JS Lambert
Can you see the woman in the window? She basks in the glow of the moment, donning a princess pink gown with a train of angel white. Nervous tears of joy stream down her vibrant face streaking her blushing cheeks a pallad hue of shadow blue. Can you see the woman in the window? She bathes in the light of renewed hope dressed in a large billowing top with teddy bears adorning the front. The sudden thrust of an innocent kick forces her to clutch her swollen belly, and a tender smile fades to a wince as motherhood pains begin to quicken. Can you see the woman in the window? she soaks in the brutality of the moment clothed in a torn cotton gown with crimson streaks down the front Like a doll thrown to the floor, she lay broken against the window her head twisted slightly askew with finger bruises around her neck. Her battered terror ravaged face pressed against a cracked window pain, like some macabre masterpiece. Two crystal blue eyes frozen in fear now free from the hands of oppression surrender a horrible unspoken truth. Huddled next to the cold lifeless body, a tiny teary-eyed little girl clutches a frail banded hand, and loudly whimpers the words: Mommy! Please wake up! Have you seen a woman in the window? Will she be there tomorrow...?
What have I done? I became the speech of starless night. Oh! I almost melted hearing God in you, not 'cause of guilt I should've owned. 'Twas really you, your voice inducing ism of greater self. Show me some humility, not by telling me your present. You were wrong when you predisposed my past has something to do with my sorrow. Do I still have pride to swallow when you've already cast the first stone? Ah, whatever you think! It matters no anymore for I to my grave the sweetness of your tongue ...once mine.
she told me she was living with cancer not dying from it and she would beat it sometimes people don't realize the promises they are making when they make them worry is another side effect of dying she was a gift, a rare and fragile flower who gave me something important but all salvation is temporary part of me went with her when she died but more of her stayed with me as our stars have crossed the thing about pain is that it demands to be felt I tell myself to live my best life today because of her
How do I describe such distress? A squirrel sat on a lower limb, His mother had chased him from the nest. His heart was broken, in upheaval, a mess. His home gone. His mother turning her back so new. Oh what, oh what will he ever do? Each breath he takes is a mighty gulp, Then the sound so soulful with every shout. Cries of pain were so deeply felt, That every bout rips my heart inside out. It renders me tearful to hear the sounds flow… The need to help him drives me so, How could his mother yield such a blow? But he is wild and won't let me help his woe. A human I'd hold so warm and tight. I'd build a nest for him if it were right. But I know he won't accept my help, As he cries on and on in his plight. For an hour he tore my heart to shreds… Then finally a young squirrel came from another tree, instead. Together they ran off fulfilling his needs… His cries stopped. He'd found what he wanted with those pleas… Now if mankind could only help those in need, with such simplicity.
T'was yesterday dipping toes in the water, telling tales by the campfire, eager to walk the trails and unafraid tasting life... T'was yesterday spent chasing dreams as storms overwhelmed the future. The painted rainbow endings vanished, became a childish fantasy... T'was yesterday when the smile fled to memories. Steps faltered in scabbed over pain, an unhealed grief filled with life's doubts... T'was yesterday, a seventh-day meal tasted in solitude bound hope. The silhouette of depression's hunger dissolved by light. T'was yesterday the trust of a child deemed the heart worthy. Love blossomed from healing touches into new growth. Janet Vick Free Verse
Such a little thing Strung between two hearts Concealed in silence That which is unknown cannot hurt Not both at least Just one heart stricken It will not stay silent It will be heard Then two hearts broken Scars heal But never disappear They just conceal the wound Bob Quigley 1/08/2012
A little angel came to Earth one day. but he didn't come here to stay. Three years was his time limit. His parents did not know it then, but God for him, had a plan. The day he was born, to everyone he brought joy. His parents loved him from the start. Manuel Zachary was his name. He grew up pretty quick. While he was here, he spread smiles, love and star dust everywhere. His family loved him very much. He was their little Angel from above. Three years he was here to spread his love and joy. One day he heard a call. It was God calling him home. His parents couldn't understand - why with them - he couldn't stay. Now he is back where he belongs and from there he watches over them. Every now and than he gives them a sign. He spreads some star dust, to let them know that he is still around... center> 08/14/2012 Written by Lucilla M. Carrillo Comments: This did happened. I was asked to write this poem. Hope you like it.
Vacant but for minute shadows, I'd mistaken for clouds our sky has lied again; it is only blue; chastely blue. No longer do you wait secretly behind celestial skeins of dust. You are only in my eyes. ©Kathryn McLoughlin Collins September 16, 20012
You can just walk away with out saying anything to me at all. I hope you keep walking and never ever turn and look back. All my life I have just wanted a kiss, a hug, and I love you once in awhile. I still remember standing by that open door 'you said I wish she were dead'. I always wondered Why the kids at my school would call me Rhonda? All you called me was whore, stupid, dumb, your worst mistake, jack ass and yes of course retard too. I didn't ask to be your daughter but I tried with everything I had to be one. I always said I love you, washed the dishes, brushed your hair I wanted you, to know that I love you and care. I try to understand what is it you don't like about me? It's okay go ahead and go away because you see I will be alright, I will work hard to make my life a good one. When I'm old and gray I promise you this, You won't be in thoughts or prayes and I won't ever look back. Written By: Rhonda Hero
That horrible day she heard those words. The cawing of those dreadful birds. The pain in her chest found its way to her eyes. Her breath came out in only short sighs. Her sister there to hold her hand, Trying to be strong for the both of them. The day had come, they knew it would. But faster than it probably should. They made as much noise as they possibly could. Anything to keep away the silence of death, And as the tears kept falling, they did their best, To try and forget this disastrous mess. But as hard as they denied it, they knew it was true. He was gone from this world, wasn't meant for it too. The last words he spoke, were held to be true. " when all the feelings had been felt, And all the tears shed. Let the acceptance begin." They echoed again and again.
You were always honest unfortunately it didn't extend to yourself Regal persona was never exceeded by your accomplishments If only you were as important as you thought others thought you were Some bring joy when they enter a room no one would ever accuse you of that Leaving was always the best gift you could offer Being you could not have been easy No friends to speak of accept one maybe not even him I think he froze in your shadow He has begun to thaw in your absence Strangely I miss you Not entirely sure why Do I in some weird way owe you for my success? Without you I would not have been born You are gone Certainly not forgotten The scars are my reminder A multitude of memories mark my soul Not your typical father son fare Norman Rockwell wouldn't paint our picture I wish I could remember happier times some wishes don't come true Eventually our nightmare came to an end You gave us the gift of leaving Am I evil for being Thankful? You died alone Should I have flown to be by your side? Perhaps Somehow it seems fitting you parted in this way If I had come I may not have been able to hide my relief Now we both have rest Scars Left Behind Contest By: Richard Lamoureux
We look in the mirror our reflections no longer intact Jagged pieces of our souls scattered in the wavy glass as the sun slowly sets on our dying dreams You turn to me I look in your eyes I once called them a poet's eyes So vibrant So emotive You reach for me I touch crystal tears falling on your cheek We make something I won't call it love An act of desperation of self-preservation as our last light slowly eases into dark Hands clutching fingers splayed feeling for that remembered spark Our bodies touch retreat strain towards absolution Desire meets denial Ecstasy embraces misery Pulses race hearts pound until we feel each beat Your eyes look beyond me I cover my body with a corner of the sheet Too much between us for meaningless words trite empty phrases We quietly let the sun as it softly slides into slumber draw the curtain on this our finality
On a meandering road, many years ago Our destination unknown We came upon an ancient and majestic oak Its branches, bare of clothing; Autumn's demand of an offering to the soil We stopped and did not venture forward Observing only from a distance Knowing that if we walked among its greatness We would not see the fullness of its truth You sketched it I sat in awe of it Years have passed and she is but a memory The tree no longer stands except for the lifeless remnant, And your sketch A cruel beheading I live knowing that it's greatness, Rooted below the earth Is a soul larger in death than in life
They've hung on him a For sale tag He's wearing a stale old plastic bag And the rest of him is in rags The whole world passes by him Stops and stares, or points at whim Mad Marley stands there everyday Without a job without the pay He knew no place but where he stood On that busy trafficked crossing road He was waiting for something to happen there Perhaps the justice that the judges couldn't spare Of some long forgotten clash of cars That had claimed his life and all its hours So there he stood all the time As the crowd of cars grew in line Then one day, a day like any other He saw a car hit another And out fell a man, the man with the scar Who had killed his wife and children with his car A drop of blood trickled down the man's nose Mirroring Mad Marley's teardrops as he rose He removed his for sale tag and plastic bag Took out the bullet that, for these 18 years he had, had And the rusted barrel of the gun He had sworn he would use to avenge his son Mad Marley fell on the pavement alone and dead With the bullet lodged inside his head
What feelings render in my heart I can't explain What emotions slaughter my soul I cannot say? The desired thought of suicide? I do not blame The sourness that contaminates the life I live in? Oh what a shame? Vengeance and anger? Those feelings to surrender? Don't ask. They have already won the game! Oh and Hope? That false emotion that has gotten us all ashamed? Oh forget it! We are all the same Peace and Cooperation? Love and Destination? What are all these silly games? What has gone is lost again and is never in your claim Oh forget it, Roll the dice! Let's continue this stupid stilly game! Your Dreams? Your Ambitions? Not everyone gets the comfy side of the plane!
< Haiku sea's tranquility bestows harmonic balance amidst tides rising Limerick aye ye matey walking its own plank let not ye other take thee to bank raise thy anchors set sail give heeve hoe to those failed find ye other sailor's who's yet sank Couplet shivery timbers captain bow is about to break toss overboard it's ye baggage holding thee dam weight Entry For {Destroyer { Poet's Divorce Club Haiku /Limerick/Couplet Contest G.L. All
"Fragments and crumbs of life, all the little pieces" John Ruskin, 1853 Scattered all around Scrambling to pick up the pieces Of what is left That was once whole Now shattered on the ground What once was beautiful Now broken and chipped away Desperate to find every piece In hopes of restoration Frantically searching Eyes darting everywhere Ignoring the pain As the shards cut As you seize each piece Even the most minuscule Clutching it ever so close As tears start to swell Chest begins to heave As panic sets in How could this have happened Failed to protect and guard Something so precious Only few ever find More valuable than gold Casting the illusion Of being untouchable Standing the test of time Safe and resistant Thus leading to distance Less guarding and sheltering Taking comfort in the safety Of letting go Only to see it topple over Like slow motion Fearfully reaching out Brushing fingertips But not quick enough Watching it descend Eyes wide No longer breathing Heart stopping Helpless now Ear-piercing As it shatters Into a million pieces Knees hitting the ground Awe struck Dumb-founded What once was treasured Lies hopeless and lifeless Even if all the pieces are found Carefully glued back together It will never be as beautiful Covered with cracks Never showing strength Only fragile and weak Telling the story of carelessness How one looked away Only for a brief moment Left vulnerable to the unknown Is now nothing more Than broken shards Glistening from tears In blood-stained hands By Shauna Riley 5/17/11 For A Rambling Poet's contest, "All the Little Pieces"
A Tribute to a beautiful Lady with a beautiful soul... A melodious voice was her forte With perfect range she could sing anything From nursery rhymes to R & B love songs She rendered each one with perfect pitch Her voice seemed to sparkle; as clear as a bell Thrilling audiences in church; filling concert halls Nurtured by her Mother who sang Gospel tunes Always her mentor at home and on world tours Her gift was eagerly shared with young and old How love for her expanded our globe This journey was not always kind to her She was taken to places she'd never been And the world was saddened by the change Fans and family prayed and she survived the fall She came back broken; we cried and loved her anyway Whitney Elizabeth Houston, another genius at her craft… gone too soon!!! RIP! ~*~ 02/11/12
Cruel intentions circle the ruby red of your lips hips that sway back and forth in a lusty pose touching, touching but never really feeling. Dim rooms, yellow lit of seedy talk and tobacco riddled nights give pretense that your loved while thwarted dreams lay at your feet grinding to thin ash The dark disclosure of your deeds rip through the heart and cut to the core but are never left unnoticed. The silence that you swear to keep this thing alive reflect in you what I despise You will go on pretending to ease your slow decline just one more time, baby just one more time.
He tried to drink from a dry well His mouth was filled with dust He searched for her Longed for her Why had she gone away Leaving him with but a memory of her sweetness Oh how she had nourished him Washed over him Sustained him He thought she was an endless source Inexhaustible Refreshing pure His sustenance Her magical waters beyond sweet He came to her with his wishes He spoke them to no others He dreamed at her edges Peered into the depths of her Saw the moons reflection on her surface He heard the echo of their tomorrows Did he demand too much? Drink too deeply? Wish with too much intensity? As he stands there He starts to cry Tears falling into her Flowing like a stream Intermingling with dust She is filled once again There are no words to explain Her spring releases into his Her well overflows A lake appears Her sweetness mixed with his tears He thought she had gone away Now He can finally see Joined as one truly free She was never meant to be contained Within well walls her heart constrained So now they both frolic under open air The moon and sun horizons to share.
We don't have a future We had a past We don't have a presence Because our love did not last We don't have a tomorrow We had a memory We thought our love was forever Because we shared so much together But we lost our memories We don't have a hope We had a prayer We had a slim chance of moving forward Because our love died many years before When we stopped loving When we stopped coping When we stopped hoping
Navy blue bucolic blinds Sneakers on the front porch Songs never heard Place to lay your head When summer comes to pass Didn't know you cared About why I cared Dreams in drawers Tucked away and folded So square Crease down the middle Wrinkles on a sleeve Pressed to young to answer Loves lost and in between Sand between our toes Schlitz beer, oh so warm Tumble on the beach Umbrella in the sand Crabs and muscles boil Till Dad calls us in Mom is on the phone Johnny's back from college Dreams of summer I remember them so well In this cold dark temple I was left to dwell But I will come home And be free When the case worker Lets it be.
He happened to me like an autumn Just like the change of leaves It was sudden But it was raining, raining on that day Raining with black umbrellas and hurried footsteps With wet papers and cold classrooms Then, just right then I heard a shrieky little laugh Just a glance and I was caught Caught in a whirlpool of warm chocolate And there, just right there Was where I met my Peter Pan To me He was a bouquet of sweet herbs Sprigs of parsley crossed by bay leaves Topped by thymes and wrapped in sage Fragranced by mint And colored by lavender He was… all the good old nature To me He was a puzzle book Filled with ancient spells And wondrous casts Rested on the shelf of red mahogany wood Dusted in ignorance Waiting to be learned To me He was a drop of sunshine on the window pane A slip of moonlight through the crack door The first morning dew and evening stroll The summer breeze and the night air To him I was a blank page A passerby ring Snow in the summer And a midnight dawn One day I swore I'd knock his guard and ask him out Yes I swore on that one day That had passed long ago
Where has all the water gone? What is not poisoned is now in poor supply… They call it "fracking," a way of trapping gas or oil for fuel to meet demands of energy. Our water on this earth is the gift of life, creating and sustaining it for all forms upon this wondrous self-sustaining world. But technology…that is the world that no other species knows about… except for man…our demand for fuel—the oil or gas, extracted in the process of this fracking…cracking… the earth below, releases chemicals into our precious flow of water there. And in the process we use up this precious fluid in capturing our prize… even in areas already stretched thin by drought. The gift of knowledge…sometimes we wonder if, in the balance of knowledge and nature, it is perhaps not a gift at all… for in the end, the needs that our gifted wisdom demands will upset the balance that the endless force of nature commands. Where has all the water gone? What is not poisoned is now in poor supply. The gift of knowledge? The doom of greed. Where has all the water gone? © Sandra M. Haight 2014 All Rights Reserved ~5th Place~ Contest: Global Poetry: Fracking's affect on the water table. Sponsor: Debbie Guzzi Judged 12/1/2014
I'm here. Holding up the sky It will not fall on you Not again In these days once more When you tell me you canna do it Not again Stuttering intakes of breathless oceans apart Yet so close as to tingle fingertips Gasping at familiar melodies of desert songbirds The smell of earth after a rainstorm Two thousand miles of trust Between us And the origin of this collaboration Of souls Back to the beginning Of recognition of you of me and Me of you and There is no end Not this day Nor tomorrows ever will I Leave you For I would cease to breathe. For my Devin
"Splendor in the Grass" can hardly breathe A beauty in the fearful, destined waters Not even Santa Catalina can lift up Natalie - An angel fallen in the hands of Evil - Macabre mask of rotten jealousy The arm of selfishness pushes her with force Her screams for help fall on empty ears As men do nothing but drink themselves to satisfaction... If you ever sail at night to Catalina Island And think you see the city lights come close You'll hear Maria's echo in the "Westside Story" And watch the glow of glitter of a fallen star... Dedicated to Natalie Wood on the day the authorities re-opened her case 2011 For Nette's Contest "Glow of Glitter" copyright@iolanda scripca 2011
1O. Shut your trap to avoid any flap 9. Do not be overly fraught by "conventional thought" (dinosaurism) 8. Know how to deal with Soylent Green People 7. Stuff your ideas and different views-tip toe on the softest of shoes 6. Paperwork and procedure (I know) one can't bumble...doing so will make ya really humble 5. That being said, just go with the herd...bite your tongue people! Don't say a word! 4. Don't think too much-like we did...that special group without computers as a kid 3. If number four applies to you, don't question the almightly computer (as I sometimes do) 2. Clever, innovative, challenging, and problematic...yes, DAMNIT!, sometimes it pays to be erratic 1. You are not a weirdo, strange, or dumb...just follow the status-quo, and get the **** done Ironic, yes; I am able to say this over the "net". Contradictory, sure; technology is a menacing lure. Maybe good 'ol Ray Bradbury was right on the money, and this is all pretty darn funny. Farenhieght 451, I think your day may come. RIP books and innovation.
Farewell my friend Now you are gone Cremated from earthly shape to ashes Never will I feel your warmth and unconditioned love again You are not suffering anymore I always knew that this day would come Yet I were not prepared To witness my lifelong friend Being enclosed by deaths unwilling power to leave you be Your illness could never have been healed Yet,when the day death embraced your body It was a smack right into my face and emotions The day that we spread your ashes over the deep forest you loved so much We were done crying Because your presence were there We could all feel it Your energy and spirit are still with us Time will come when we shall meet again Since you stepped over to the next dimesion Days feels empty with a deafening silence Until death embraces my earthly life,and our spirits have rejoined I shall live my life here to honour your name and legacy Farewell my lifelong friend So long We`ll meet again on the other side Memories we have from your time on earth,will refuel my empty soul And keep me going Rest in piece my friend About this poem..I belive we will all be reunited when our time here is done. Cheers my friends out there
happy (dead) mothers day a fistfull of flowers for your resting place didn't have time to know you you were far swifter than your time, just a few clips from an ancient reel my your smile was sweet and wide don't feel much anymore time is fond of sweeping heart and mind under the floorboards a piggyback ride a cat named blue a silver music box is all there is of us
This life's journey is like climbing the stairs each step, year by year. moving up in the air the higher I get, seems the harder to breathe My ascent has stalled, sorrow seems to impede loss of passion to climb and no will to explore filled with anger, unfairness, ahead a closed door having desire and need, for a warm body to hold Fierce hurricane winds, they have taken there toll thoughts of taking a step, repressed by the tide it's filling the vacuum, where my heart use to hide filled with sorrow and pain, from life on this earth letting the darkness, decide what it is worth Is this journey over and do I need to lay down joy and happiness lost, my heart's closing down I'll know the end has come, if I don't feel the sunshine It's rays feed my soul, like a fine cheese and wine "My body gets nourishment from Mother Earth, sunshine fills my soul with Gods grace and mirth"
Depression 3 o'clock in the morning… The sounds of bed frames hitting drywall, The sounds of Chopin and Coltrane played With a hint of sadness in tone. Sounds of whores and pimps arguing; "Where is the money, you whore?!" "I don't have the money!" A sound of a slap to the face A big hand crushing bone, Blood everywhere Red streaks on white walls. The sound of drunks walking gloomy streets, Police and ambulance rush down burned out streets Sirens wailing, crying out! A child, six years old Crying, "Momma! Momma!" Shedding tears over his dying mother, lost her soul to the Crack pipe. Rest In Peace. A sound of a .357 magnum revolver click And a gunshot shakes the nerves of many, And for a moment the sweet and peaceful silence. "Dispatch, suicide on 46th street Hollywood Boulevard, Send the Corner. Over." Then the darkness sails over And the entire cities are showered with tears from the heavens, But no one weeps, Not a single soul… -10/2/13-
On Memorial Day I am haunted and flooded with so much grief. My Mother lies next to my Grandmother and they next to my Great Aunt. My Fathers name is there, too, but blessedly he's not there yet. Such great memories are restored as I look at each stone. Once again I'm a rambling child with no kids of my own. I remember the safety they afforded me, and all the treats and their love. All their little sacrifices they gave, when I was still too young to know. Why did I chase after a kitten when Grandma was so close by my side? A simple tug on her skirt and she would of hugged me and smiled with pride. Why was I discovering butterflies, when my Great Aunt was close there too? She made the best pies EVER from scratch while I played in another room. Why did I take Mom for granted… when as a child she gave me so much? What I wouldn't give for her gentle touch… and another soothing hug… And Grandpa lies by Grandma… he was always repairing something or by her side. And now there are all my aunts, uncles, and cousins that are all scattered around. They made Christmas my favorite time as their talk and laughter rang out. They'd laugh, talk, and enjoy each other's company, as I'm sure now they do. I can't imagine them in any other way, than at my Grandma's on those wonderful days. We'd sit down to a holiday feast with everyone all around and it all seemed like play. Were they then thinking of others that they knew from long ago? As I walk around the graveyard picking out old friends, I remember their wistful looks… They did the same each year, as they talked about the past even back then. Perhaps its time my stone goes there, though I've a few more years to go. That will help my children when it's also my time to go… And surprisingly it makes me feel I'm not leaving the older family alone. It's like a kiss, and a tug on a skirt to leave that something behind. It's a promise… they'll be remembered until it too, is my time… Until then I'll bring my children and tell stories from long ago… One day a year can't be too much since it's memories that I bestow. And they all simply add up to the life that I have known.
He stares into the distance of the days, of those gone and of those yet to come -- he touches no one, is touched by no one. Yet noisy commerce around him flows, constant movement; but movement without a change of place, no progress forward, no backward retreat -- an illusion of movement, only. He sees youths -- with no sense of self -- and leathery crones, unhygienic vagrants, no place to go, assailed by noises -- a repetitious assault upon the ear and air. Still he sits, in frozen semi-trance, staring always inward, but also into distance, sentient and inert.
From the parlor window, She looks beyond the decrepit wooden rails of the low fence where five Rhode Island Reds graze around in tall brown grass hunting grasshoppers One cock sits perched on a post, in the shade of an elm keeping watch Down the deserted asphalt road, Heat waves blur the horizon A dusty whirlwind has picked up a tumbleweed And spins it against nearby barbed wire that surrounds the coop The sound of the windmill moans a painful whine She looks with empty eyes, at the room around her, An old clock ticks away the minutes in slow motion The mantel displays photographs of a life she hardly recalls She lays her hand on the desk, picks up the phone that never rings and carefully listens to the dial tone Then once again looks out the window And gazes out at the gravel driveway, toward someone not coming
Starry nights remind me of those time we stay up all night waiting for shooting stars to weave our dreams with, those times when your love is unceasingly flowing like the river and that holding hands seem the only thing that matters in this world, those were perfect moments I thought would last but then Van Gogh must be right to paint the stars with shades of blue and gray for you have left me with tears and broken promises and I will forever wonder if wishes under shooting stars do really come true.
Today is sublime… Tearing at the flesh of yesterday, falling, asynchronous, in the hour of ruin. Screams dissolve into crimson flow; mechanical men guard in smoky rows; demons tempt with savory sins as frozen smiles reflect from the hell within the tides of murky waters. My eyes burn. My throat swells. My spirit's scarred from restraint… Today is sublime… Sucking at the marrow of the absolved, sinking, prisoners smell burnt flesh and quiver with fright, choking on the sinew and stench. Screams sear in crimson rooms, seducing the rabid dogs from the depths of dank tombs. My eyes burn. My throat swells. My spirit's scarred from restraint… Today is sublime… In the misty garden, we slither…let's celebrate. **Heavy Metal Music By Rhonda Johnson-Saunders, 10/8/13 for Nette Onclaud's Groove It! Contest
So I tried to laugh it off, told myself that it was fine The blood stains on the ground help me feel alive I look to you to end the nightmare with a happy dream Before you made it, I fell to pieces, and I lost everything. I don't know what hurts the most- Knife in side or stone in throat, All I know is that this room won't quit spinning. I wake in blood I wake in sweat Is this my life? Who's in my head? I woke up bleeding Tears from my eyes I said I'm sorry For using my life. Wake me up blackness darkness. Let me fester inside my mind. Let this cancer grow to completion. Put a choke-hold on the heart. I can't lie that the knife went deep, My pen cut deeper...
Oh, the wounds, the gaping wounds The wounds that never truly heal Merely self-sutured, leaving jagged scars left to swell, ooze and re-infect A temporary stop-gap, a leaking dam built to hold back the raging river of pain... Oh, would that the scars would explode, burst open and gush out Gush out in primal fury, leaving me helpless and drained Helpless and drained before the Almighty who is able not to simply close and smooth them over, but who is able to brutally and lovingly rip them loose Oh yes, He is able and willing; if I am willing... (Partly inspired by events spanning the last 13 years)
A feckless mist came out of nowhere, to blur the fresco of my dream, and frayed the edges of my sorrow, with no regard for where I've been. How often have I searched the night, to hear the voice that calls to me, to trace the outline of a smile, or once again recall the face, if only for a little while... Yet, somehow the mist eclipsed my dream, and schemed to take it all from me ___________________________________ For "Through The Mist" contest, sponsored by Nette Onclaud By Carrie Richards 8/21/14
If I could dream for anything I would dream of Peace, Love and Unity for all Bloods & Crips all gangs, are in need of a change for you represent such ignorance and scrutiny Difference in colors worn Sides in which you were born are truly all that divides when the two opposing sides collide and it makes no sense for we all Bleed Blue turned Red Blood Inside And a future generation is hard to provide when death, is like your shadow creepin' up by your side and drive-by shootings happen each late night, outside where running seems the only option to know for no places to hide no defense for your demise for a difference in colors worn and what side in which you were born is truly all that divides when these two sides collide and it makes no sense to me for we all Bleed Blue turned Red Blood Inside
The dusk casts its shadow upon the land robbing the light, setting the stage for caliginosity . Moonlight faint against transitioning light stretches eerie fingers onto a land that allows no man. Twisted steel, mimicking an uncanny monster, stationary, only its shadow moves with moon passing. Silence, cold and unrelenting as death is undisturbed by gentle breeze, yet, faintly, a rustle interrupts calling attention be paid, will be ignored forever more. Huge sockets once capable of sight blindly bear witness, a planet once beautiful and bright, races through the universe devoid of life.
Stimulating ideas pop into your head You need a pen…you need a piece of lined paper It looks like you're outtah luck…no wonder you're drowning in dread You need a shoulder to lie your head down for a moment's rest… You need a helper…to aid you while you struggle emotionally… I'm not trying to irritate you purposely Try with all your might…try your best To stay optimistic and fervent I believe that you'll pass the test Be upbeat, kindhearted and jubilant I appreciate the words you wrote on my notebook… Sometimes, I feel like leftovers left on the counter… I'm a rotten mess – you're leaving me as if I'm an uninteresting book Sometimes, I feel like a coward – I don't mean to bother… But, you're like no other . . . You're like a mat – you're constantly stepped on… I'm like YOUR unwanted tool – I stepped on you and Pushed your buttons I accused you of being the fool When, in fact, I'm the fool by your side… You're drifting…pushing me aside… I'm writing words of truth though – Expressing how much I'm fond of you I esteem your presence Glowing with glee At times, you do say things without thinking I'm the god of distress – You're leaving me breathless Cutting me down like I'm some decaying tree You don't see how much you make me… Guilty for your crimes Taking the blame about the hundredth time At times, I feel that I'm awkward when I'm around you You're like a backpack – you carry everyone's weight… You're like a sponge – soaking in our stress I'm a distraction to you – you're wasting valuable time…but don't hesitate I'm writing words of self-centered feelings – logic doesn't exist… But these feelings aren't as bad as committing a crime These feelings come and go – I just had to confess I didn't mean to screw up your progress… Hey, if you need a few sheets of paper to right on, Use me like a notebook instead…and write with all your might It seems as if you read me…like a book that drags on and on Use me as your tool of relaxation… and read me all night When you wrote those words on my notebook… It made my day…you're such a delight Like reading a fascinating, classic book
What will they say of me when I am gone? An eccentric fool lost in his yesterdays? A lonely soul locked away in the ancient house He saved from destruction? Will someone scavenger through the wastes of my life The photographs, notes, writings, drawings . . . . And find some shred of humanity there? What will they say of me when I am gone? Will our letters be found and read again? Perhaps some young girl, wide-eyed in awe Discovering that people really can love Past the limits of their endurance Will someone finger your locket And wind up your music box To watch the ballerinas turn and sway To a melody that once had meaning? Will they wonder about the little things? Two train tickets from Munich to Milan Blossoms pressed between pages of a Gibran book A napkin where you blotted your lipstick And I saved it because it imprinted you indelibly Will they assign it all to the trash or fire? And if the smoke of us rises past the stars Will you gather it up and hold it dear and remember?
As jy jou pyn buite wys sal vriendelike, Irreterende vreemdeling jou inlig dat die wêreld aanhou draai. En hulle is reg. Dit doen. Maak nie saak hoe hard jy dit smeek om te stop. Dit hou aan draai. Ek word wakker en is gelukkig vir drie sekondes. Dan onthou ek, Dit draai en kantel mense uit hul beddens In hul karre, hul kantore. 'n Stortvloed van klein mans en vrouens Wat deur die lewe tuimel. Probeer om nie te dink wat daar onder wag. Soms draai dit en stuur ons Wankelrig in mekaar se arms. Ons kleef styf, Opgewonde en laggend, Vreemdelinge saam gegooi op 'n bewegende prethuis vloer. En dan draai die wêreld weer. En iemand val af... Dis so 'n lang pad af Koud van skok, Kan ons net staan en kyk hoe hulle val En geleidelik kleiner word. Onttrek stadig uit ons geheue Tot hulle nie meer sigbaar is. Ons versamel in begraafplase, Stil en gespanne, Asof ons die impak gaan hoor; Die plons van 'n rivier klip in 'n donker put, Probeer om die diepte te meet. Probeer om te meet hoe ver ons val. Geen impak kom; Geen plons. Die oomblik gaan verby. Die wêreld draai En ons draai weg, Gaan aan met ons lewens... Ons vou ons self toe In gerieflike voorspelbaarhede Om ons warm te hou teen die koue. "Tyd is 'n goeie geneesheer" "Ten minste was dit vinnig" "Die wêreld hou aan draai"
Falling down the rabbit hole, tumbling, twisting, uncontrolled. Regret filled voices fill the void, each one calling out my name. Caught in fractured dreams, reflections of my true self haunt me. Blood red shards fill the air, no love remains here. Bitter pieces of a broken mind, seeking out my personal truth. Step through the shattered mirror with me, and see this unreality.
A nation at war with itself A father sucking his daughter's breasts A child cheering at her mother's pain My heart is heavily laden My soul bleeds profusely disaster comes with every meal Tragedy is my morning shower Irrational has attained rational To err has become acceptable Abnormality is now being celebrated the corpse is rot but we still court it My phobia for ills have been suppressed My mates scorn my many woes My behind is the house of humor My back is like a senile penis Indeed,I was made to be great How my success got waylaid? is a mystery beyond my big head My name,my friend,is Nigeria How did i go wrong?
Pain is suddenly being left alone its when you lose someone who was everything pain is when you don't know what to do when all seems to be falling in on you pain is when you have no one to dry your tears or hold you in the night when everything seems a fright pain is just hurting because you feel all alone and don't have anyone to hear you call out in the night its when you walk and walk and walk, and have no where to go pain is all these things and more; but somewhere - sometime - a gentle soul enters your life and gives you a smile, dries your tears, and lets you know that you're not alone. you find that pain is no longer controlling your life when this gentle soul shows you the way its when you can tell them: when I lost my smile, you gave me yours; when I needed a friend, you were there; when I didn't know what to do, you showed me; for all that you have been, and all that you are - I will love you. Dedicated to my wife, Janet - for all that you have been and are.
it's the unconditional love that always takes me back it's the words of encouragement that you never seemed to lack from that first day your soul graced my trying world of need you brought such a loving peace I never wanted you to leave to you my priceless friend of hope your beauty still shines true I think of your laughter everyday and each tear that bound us true I wonder just what could have been it's funny how lives push on the days they pass so quickly now and my heart, it does cry out if only one thing I hold so dear and will never, ever let go it's the hope deep within in my heart that one day your love, once again will console.... o why.... o why did you go.... _________________________________________ Contest ~ "Ode To A Friend"
He looks At the collage With glassy eyes The pieces of the puzzle of him The memories that have been stolen Swept away Vanquished An occasional glimmer A spark of recognition His dear mother She had taught him three languages Now he barely remembers one The contours of her face make him smile She had formed the poet The professor This lover of words Sadly only fragments of him remain Pictures of his sons Long absent from his life Their happy faces A facade of happier times that could have been Intelligence and expectations his curse his gift They felt the weight of his words placed on their hearts They never felt good enough smart enough not like him the great man The reader and translator of superior minds Honored Knighted by kings Celebrated The pictures part of his collage Proof that he was here That his life was real Not imagined Others remember Yet mercifully he forgets The sadder parts The picture of the car The brother that was killed The blame that was heaped on him Him the unsuspecting child The scars he carried through his days until now He hopes to continue to remember how to forget Not afraid of death No longer lost in regret The collage of him Pictured moments Displayed In no particular order Words Images A chair occupied A mind denied Still within The poet trapped Continues life's ride I wrote this poem about the famous Poet Edwin Honig after watching a documentary about him filmed by his cousin. "First Cousin Once Removed."
A great despair... Heavy and burdensome.. Hangs like wet wool, covering the motionless night... From a door... Within the depths of self... Realization springs forth... Uncoiling, like a serpent in strike.... Time is the great equalizer of man... It paints the picture of truth... For we all march daily towards death and deliverance... Loss fills the plate... Where once, Tomorrow reined.....TAH
You took my feelings and casted them aside. As you played your games with my mind. Broke my heart and tore it apart. I believed your words that flowed from your heart. What for? I am asking myself now? Just to be made the fool in everyone's eyes. Well I am here to tell you to move on. You have already out stayed your welcome. Never will I cry another tear drop for you. Never will your name touch my lips again. You hurt me once and that's all you get I will not fall back into your web of lies and guilt. You loss this friendship along with me. I hope your games were worth it in the end.
I see you as if reflected in your dressing table mirrors or the waters of the old garden pond You hear me through the echos or whistling little answers things you've not quite placed from through the veil That separates the times of life and death You see me through the window In the nature of the robin Know when I'm around through scents you breathe I leave you little signs like a solitary pure white feather Place where you can find it So you know my love I'm with you Just a simple little pleasure shows I live But my dear I wait here for you As I bless you with my presence I walk through troubled times right by your side And I fight the good fight with you in my stride I see those tears of sadness When your head is on your pillow Now that you know I am still with you Perhaps now you can smile and shine with pride For you know within your conscience I'm your guide
This lost sorrowed soul Gropes for sanity In the presence of a dark moon, Waiting to begin her life anew Like her sister in the sky After both are drained From all their light. Wild winds blow fierce tonight-- Beating trees to bow low And causing great waves to Rise and crash upon the shore. A long cold night to reflect Upon disheartened lives Changed forever by This insidious war. When sleep finally arrives There are no dreams, Just frightful nightmares In fitful restless sleep. At sunrise it is still cold, But there is light.
William Thomas Pickering, 2nd Battalion Royal Fusiliers, G/3371 born 1881 died 1916 Commemorated by name on the Thiepval Memorial, France. Remembrance day .. A field of bright red poppies dance As I walk hand in hand with my children Through the battle fields of the Somme In my pocket, I have a bunch of wheat A token memory from where he fell At peace, to have walked where he walked As the poppies begin to fade.... I hear the thunder of guns, shrieking shells I see a vast sea of dismembered bodies A No-Man's Land of mud and wire A military display of fireworks dispersing Casting light on this horrific hell on earth For underneath the poppies lie, the remains Of so many men who died, blown to pieces; Where a river of blood will forever bleed Passed on from generation to generation The great loss of war, which nobody wins As I remember my Great-Grandfather William Thomas Pickering.....
Her thoughts drift out the window on the cool autumn breeze and a smile creeps upon her withered face as she remembers the first time she saw this house This house that is so old and worn like her heart and she sways to the music in her mind as a tune tumbles from her memory she dances and twirls across the floor as the melody carries her dream back to the days when he was still alive and would sweep her into his arms and kiss her wrinkled brow she stops in mid-stride and a tear rolls down her leathery cheek and she smiles a smile for the love they shared when they were caught up in their dreamers dance.
"When the power of love overcomes the love of life, peace and contentment extend the hand of remembrance."
The candles we light in honor of your name Reflect the brightness you gave to our lives Burn away at the darker side surrounding Giving way to freedom's path for your spirit Helping bring healing to the hearts that miss you Binding you in mind, faith and prayer So your memory can live on and bring comfort To those that walk in hope, with you beside them
I soar above the world with effortless ease My movements sublime, my heart at peace Gliding gently, watching the world go by I am a mighty bird, and I fly high I have a brood in my nest, to which I always return Ensuring food on the table, security, protection The brood stays satiated, warm and dry But I am a mighty bird, I have to fly In my search for food, I travel through many lands Land of Kings and Pharaohs and magic wands In one such land I saw you, Oh! Angel of mine With a smile so true and eyes that shine Through those eyes of yours into your soul I peered All my feelings, my emotions, towards you they steered I flew into your arms, to tell you my thoughts and what I desire That's when I remembered, I am a bird, I have to fly I am a mighty bird and I fly high As I soar into the heavens, after bidding you good bye I see a small river, shining just like your eyes I land next to it, and I cry, and I cry I cry because I need you, but my brood needs me too And I have responsibilities, duties to do But your eyes keep looking into my heart so deep And it pokes me raw, makes me bleed I sit by the river watching the drops flow by Glistening like little pearls, reminding me of your eyes Eyes that tell me to soar again into the sky Be a fearless bird, and fly high As I fly back to my nest, the air seems dense My speed reduces due to my heart's burden But I know there is no way, but ahead, for me Back to my own nest, my own tree But I see you everywhere, wherever I look Giving me strength to stand by the decisions I took And the resolve to again launch into the sky To be a mighty bird, to fly high
Why are you so devilishly addicting? I come back from you, It looks like I'm on drugs: High and drunk, Out of my mind. The demons inside us braid hairs Until we're peaceful meadows apart, Nuclear wars together.
Author Note: Entry into Blind Faith Contest At the end of days, the earth displays its anger, Clouds part, heaven awaits, choosing life, I depart.
written 3rd Oct 2013 I was in love with the most lovable sheila but she did darn take off with me heeler Overnight, she had packed their bags not just me dog, gone too with me scallywags Left with just a simple note she had found a more loving bloke Heartbroken to have lost them all I gave me mate Bluey a call Together we drank more than just a slab ending up so hammered, he called us a cab As the lonely days passed and tears filled me eyes by crikey it hit me, suddenly I came to realise What a bloomin idiot, she deserved such love and respect every night boozin with me mates, my true love I did neglect I'm gunna cut me drinkin and win her heart back fair dinkum fella's, you can flamin bet on that!
given my heart words the brain cannot decipher synapses fire in desperation fingers laze, do not will a pen to write them keys not evident to type them morning fog, evaporated sunlight cling frozen to winter cold too quick the change, notice for a moment vanish to safekeeping, locked away still I search for that code
I met you halfway. Why did you have to take the bigger half? I held your heart in my broken fingers, my throbbing nerves were soothed by the cold. You lashed out at me, breaking through my second skin. Perhaps you thought it was armor. Leaving me sitting, crying, halfway between heartache and sorrow. I looked at you with contorted eyes. Listened with my popped eardrums. You sang your maniacal song. Fortunately I could not hear, I was halfway under the ocean of my fears. Afraid of losing you, being lost in you, losing my mind. Halfway not moving, stuck. Wanting you. Why you? Why me? There can be no meeting halfway! I chose different, that was no place to stay. I turned, I ran, went my seperate way. All the while you chose, to sit and cry. For some strange reason stayed. Locked, lost, in our yesterday. Halfway from reaching, grasping, understanding, that for us, there is no tomorrow. For Archaic Poet's first contest. His poem that I re-imagined is called "Meet Me Half Way"
'n Oomblik waardig van afsondering 'n Vreemdeling nie deur ander gesien Is ons die verlate? Is ons die verlater? Lewe in die nag om sy wreedheid te skuil Hul gesigte belig die skerms Die rykes maak geld uit dié oorlog Die sterftesyfer styg Nog 'n verraaier Die leuenaar, die patriot Hoeveel leuens, hoeveel sterftes Afgemaai soos 'n lam wat geslag word Nog 'n spook vir jou verlede Nog 'n gelowige, nog 'n slagoffer Ken nie die pad van die tou na die vloer Kyk in die gesig van die wat jou verraai Jy is die gejagte, die slagoffer, die prooi en die vervalle Ons sterf almal alleen.
Visits long ago to the Blaskets Islands, to untouched areas on the Dingle peninsula came to mind on this sleet winter's eve. The peninsula, nestled in heather mountains. The coastline, tongues of lonely white sand. waved rocks, drenched in blue mussels tide pools, alive with shrimps and periwinkles A sea-salted life unspoiled and free. Only marine life remains, but I still hear the music our native language, the voices of Seanchaí the ballads, sean?s, Peig Sayers who shaped our school years, her renditions of island life her mad pise?gs, handed down from generation to generation. Stories of Islanders huddled together under thatch, open turf fires cooking pot on a hook, the sweet air wafting of clay pipe tobacco a pinch of snuff sniffed from a silver box, nursing a glass of neat Poitín, uisce beatha, the strong smell of tweeds and geansaí báinín. I think of times lost, changed forever. Cottage ruins, where goats roam free, An Blascaod Mór my history, my heritage. Gaelic words in this poem * Seanchaí – storytellers Sean?s – singing without music Peig Sayers and her mad pise?gs – A Gaelic writer who we studied in school and her mad superstitions. Poitín, uisce beatha – very strong alcohol made from potatoes, called the water of life. geansaí báinín – strong sheep wool sweaters usually in a cream colour with complex patterns.
Aeonia! Eve! whoever now you may be... what was it he (they) wanted of you ever to be? "Bewitching WENCH!"- dare ye tempt the virtues of virtuous men! Words turned to black sludge of many tongues wagging, blaming and convincing her.of sins- shadow always inviting her, giving her no choice. Rapture Aeonia! Rapture Aeons! Rapture Aeonia! Impaled upon the spike of shame, apart torn, the tiny beads of herself come together... magnetically, magically clinging together as an army of a tiny promise- once told to her, a tiny escapade... escape whispered so long ago. Open your eyes Aeonia, after millennias untold of distaste. Open your eyes! Allow your sagging, savaged breasts to be bountiful once again- breasts once compared to mountains of plenty, to celebrate! Your blackened shell, proof of the fires of rage- Aeoina Rise! Aeon RISE! Aeonia rise to the dawn of a new day! Eviscerate the evil brought upon you by demon Man. A beast once hidden to shadows unbidden. His power is a farce! Raper, reaper, killer, user. ****er of all things good, of all things alive and all things true. Torturer of golds, silvers and blues. Cast your shadows, cast them I say! Faker, liar, betrayer of all things of nature and good. Gluttonous for your own selfish means. A. Green
I find myself sprawled on the floor Frantically trying to gather the pieces My heart has been shattered Jagged, sharp, crimson colored shards I lay wounded, unaware of my surrounding The surface is hard and cold, a slab of granite A crowd of onlookers, strangers stop to stare They gasp in disbelief at the spectacle I have a front row seat, standing room only The sunlight has pierced my soul, I lay exposed Heartbroken, abandoned, dignity is out the window I'm holding a bloody big chunk of my heart I tell myself, breathe in, breath out I close my eyes, so that I may see with clarity With eyes closed, the view is breathtaking Healed, healthy, vibrant and alive Still with my eyes closed, wide open, I see the crowd They begin to applaud, then quickly disperse I become the lone witness as my heart heals itself As the darkness explodes into sunlight, triumph Delete sadness. Insert hope. I hear someone in the crowd singing my song ~Rick Berry
I Hope You're Reading These, Because Although We Cannot Be Together, We Made So Much S