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The next Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop will be held March 31-April 2, 2016, at the University of Dayton, Erma's alma mater. Check back for registration and program details.
You'll laugh. You'll cry.
You'll want to call your mother.
Writer/performer Mary Lou Quinlan is bringing her critically acclaimed one-woman show, "The God Box, A Daughter's Story," to the University of Dayton's Boll Theatre March 30-31 as a benefit for the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop endowment fund.
It's been called "a beautiful play with a heart full of love behind it."
Tickets can be ordered online here, by calling 937-229-2545 or visiting the box office on the first floor of Kennedy Union on campus. The box office is open 9 a.m. to 3 p.m., Mondays through Fridays and 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. on Saturdays. Here are the details for the two performances:
7 p.m. March 30, Boll Theatre. Tickets: $25 (includes book) or $15. Group rate: Buy four tickets, get one free. "Talkback" follows the show: "Writing Your Heart Out," with Mary Lou Quinlan joining local authors Katrina Kittle, Mary McCarty, Sharon Short and Joanne Huist Smith onstage. Bring your mothers, daughters, girlfriends, book clubs, soul mates and the special men in your lives. We're calling this night "Mother's Day in Dayton."
7 p.m. March 31, Boll Theatre. "The Bombeck Family Special Benefit for the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop." Tickets: $50 (includes book and dessert reception). Emcee: Cheryl McHenry, WHIO-TV anchor. "Talkback" follows the show: "A Mother's Bond," featuring Betsy Bombeck and Mary Lou Quinlan onstage.
Like many who lose a loved one, Quinlan, an overachieving and devoted daughter, struggled to come to terms with the death of her mother until her remarkable discovery of her mother's "God Boxes," filled with hundreds of private petitions written by the very hand that had slipped away.
The notes trigger Quinlan's unraveling, an emotional roller coaster of the heart, revealing things about her mother and herself that she never knew and driving her to the ultimate human challenge — learning to let go.
This true story, written by Quinlan, became a New York Times' best-selling book The God Box and inspired her solo show "The God Box, A Daughter's Story." Performed by Quinlan, and co-written and directed by Martha Wollner of New York City's Labyrinth Theater Company, this theatrical piece follows Quinlan on the journey of a lifetime.
Quinlan, a charismatic storyteller with a blue-chip career as a CEO, entrepreneur, author and speaker, has performed the show across the U.S. for three years, including a sold-out New York run at 59 East 59th Theater Off-Broadway as well as 24 performances this past summer at the world-renowned Edinburgh Festival Fringe in Scotland to rave reviews.
After Quinlan served as a keynote speaker at the sold-out Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop in 2014, she offered to bring her one-woman show to campus to support the workshop's efforts to remain affordable for writers from all levels of experience from all over the country.
"Mary Lou is as generous and gracious as she is talented," said Teri Rizvi, founder and co-director of the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop. "She shares her mother's gift of faith, love and letting go in a show that entertains and moves audiences. In the spirit of her mother, she donates all proceeds to causes she believes in — from women's health issues to education. It's beyond inspiring."
Here's what the critics are saying about her solo show:
"A beautiful play with a heart full of love behind it." Five Stars, British Theatre Guide
"Moments of joy and discovery and…tearful loss. It's very intimate to (look) through the windows of the soul, with sympathy and compassion. Quinlan's performance feels as natural as a conversation." Marti Sichel, NY Theater Critic
"Heartfelt, well-acted and engaging. Quinlan's character is vulnerable and basely human…an impressive production." Broadway Baby, FOUR STARS
"Compelling and emotionally involving…excellently crafted and delivered…heart-rending show." Three Weeks, FOUR STARS
Proceeds from performances of "The God Box, A Daughter's Story" have raised nearly $250,000 for charities supporting cancer and hospice care, education and community causes. More information is available on www.theGodBoxProject.com and on Facebook.
The March 30-31 performances are co-sponsored by the Dayton Rotary Foundation; CareSource Foundation; PNC; Mauro Orthodontics; the University of Dayton's Alumni Association; Office of Special Programs and Continuing Education; Provost's Office; Communication Department; the Women's Center; the School of Education and Health Sciences, Division of Student Development; Merle Wilberding and Susan Elliott; Erik and Kelly Freudenberg, HORAN; Jack and Vicki Giambrone; Greg and Mindy Hoffbauer; and Zafar and Teri Rizvi. WHIO-TV is the media co-sponsor, and Washington-Centerville Public Library is providing promotional support. Other support provided by Progressive Printers, University of Dayton Bookstore, Bob Ross Auto Group, Walling Photography LLC and Skip Peterson Photography.
In 2004, University of Dayton alumnus Ralph Hamberg and his wife, Cindy, gave a $100,000 gift to start a workshop endowment fund in memory of her cousin, Brother Tom Price, S.M. This University of Dayton English professor first told Erma "three little words" of encouragement, "You can write!" The Hamberg family, the Bombeck family and other supporters continue to contribute to the endowment fund, which allows the University of Dayton to keep the workshop affordable for writers. To make an online gift, click here.
Three March Madness tips
The March Madness college basketball tournament is on the brink of exploding on Americans. Strap yourselves up. Zero in. And take to heart these three tips:
Tip One: For those of you who are employed, figure out a way to watch all the games while at work and not get caught by your boss. This will be especially important for the 12 first Round games that start on a Thursday at noon EST.
You must — this is a command not a request — pipe the games into your office computer and watch them including the thousands of commercials. If you have any work to do that day, get it done in the morning. If you don't have any work to do that day, that's even better. Stay out of the office fray. Lay low. Don't ask any questions. Don't offer any suggestions. Don't respond to emails even those marked "urgent." Don't add value. Don't help the business.
Focus on your main objective: watching the games on your computer the entire afternoon. This won't boost America's gross domestic product, which is the total output of goods and services. But nothing else can or will. You are not to blame for America's economic malaise. That's on them.
Tip Two: For those of you who don't work, you're golden. Absorb all 12 games without fear of losing your job because you don't have one. This is the biggest upside to being unemployed. On the first day of March Madness, you get to hang out and watch all the games in peace. No need to be coy and dishonest. As you watch, don't search job boards. Take the day off. Kick your feet up. Munch Funyons. Drink Cream Soda. Think about your basketball career if you had one. Imagine one if you if you didn't. Ask yourself why you never got to play in the March Madness tournament. It probably was because you didn't want it bad enough. This is always the reason people don't succeed. They are not willing to pay the price. They reveal their weakness. In your case, you were not willing to go outside in the cold and practice one thousand foul shots every day 365 days a year from the ages of 12 through 17. That's on you. Girls distracted you. They ate away at too much of your basketball practice time. You let it happen. You were weak. Meek people deserve what they get.
Tip Three: To bone up on the March Madness teams, read essays from me here until the title game on Monday night in April. I pledge to deliver to you a bastion of sports paraphernalia that will give you all the March Madness you need, don't need and don't care to know, such as player profiles, psychological dilemmas, historical context, links to academic concepts, interpersonal conflicts between players and coaches, weather reports, and inappropriate personal asides.
I will distill all you need to know about the tournament into chicken nuggets of content that is as digestible as butterscotch pudding and/or chicken nuggets. Ignore the millions of other writers covering the tournament. They will give you what you already know and expect and are comfortable with: who won, who lost, a prediction that Kansas will go to the Sweet 16. Those people will be sensible, insightful, logical and good at what they do.
You don't need that. Break from your comfort zone. Live a little. Marinate with me in some real March Madness.
— Charles Hartley
Charles Hartley is a freelance writer who has had more than 1,000 articles published in a wide range of media outlets focused on humor, sports, business, technology and consumers. He has earned master's degrees in journalism and business administration and a bachelor's degree in English and communications.
The sweat from a few hours of cleaning was beginning to cool as they collapsed on the green recliner sofa.
"All I want to do," said Dad, "is keep my feet up for the rest of the night. What's on?" Mom handed him the remote and put her own foot rest up.
"Nothing sounds good. How about a few episode of 'That Trite Sitcom' for background noise, " she suggested.
Dad reclined all the way back, grunting his approval. Mom clicked to the play-it-now channel and closed her eye as the opening credits played. She pulled a nearby superhero-themed fleece blanket over her legs, vaguely registering that a heavier, living blanket was wrapping around her remote-control arm.
"Oh, I love this show," chirped 8-year-old Thing-Two. He adjusted his red satin cape so that it covered Mom and himself. He then spent most of the progrm squirming as he tried to find the ultimate snuggle position. Mom decided it was nice that her youngest child was still young enough to have not put away childish things like cuddling. Thing-Two was still trying every hug technique known to science as Mom began to drift off.
"Awe," Thing-Two sighed. "Mom, mom! Look at that baby." He patted Mom's arm gently and then firmly until she opened her eyes. "Isn't he cute?" Thing-Two gestured at the TV.
"Very cute," Mom mumbled and closed her eyes again.
"I want to be a dad someday," Thing-Two said, wrapping Mom's arm around himself.
"Someday," said Mom, "you'll be a great dad, Buddy."
"Yeah, I can't wait," said Thing-Two. "It's number 4 on my bucket list." Mom's eyes opened wide. She twisted her head to look at Thing-Two's face and saw Dad had focused his attention on their son.
"You have a bucket list?" Mom asked.
"Of course," answered Thing-Two. "I've been working on it for years. I want to grow up and marry a sweet girl and be a dad and dance and have a…"
"How do you now what a bucket list is?" Mom interrupted.
"I've always known about them," he answered. "Don't you have a bucket list, Mom?"
Dad was listening quietly and smiled at Mom.
"Well, I've heard of them, and I could start one," she stammered. "But we've done a lot of bucket stuff." She looked at Dad and shrugged, hoping he would have something to add.
Thing-Two looked into Mom's eyes. He was silent for a few minutes, inspecting her face.
"Mommy, you really ought to have a bucket list," he said. He squirmed to face the TV and see the baby again.
"Otherwise you might spend the rest of your life doing nothing but cleaning and siting on the couch."
— Rachel Barlow
Blogger Rachel Barlow describes herself as "a midlife crisis waiting to happen, closet nomad and middle-aged work-at-home-mother of two." Her life is "wrapped up in peanut butter sandwiches, fat (sometimes losing it), bills and blogging (her way) to sanity."
Food for thought
According to an old saying, you are what you eat. Since I am full of baloney, I eat what I am.
Unfortunately, I don't know what to eat these days — especially bologna, which means I am out to lunch — because I am on three different diets.
This has nothing to do with fat, which is all in my head. It stems from the fact that: (a) I have a history of kidney stones, (b) I have a history of high cholesterol and (c) I aced history in high school.
Naturally, all three diets contradict each other.
The first one, which was given to me by my urologist, is called the Low Oxalate Meal Plan. I had never heard of oxalates, but they sound like a species of cattle ("the male oxalate, which can weigh 1,500 pounds, is one of the dumbest animals on earth") whose meat makes an excellent steak that I could wash down with beer.
Imagine my horror when I, a guy who loves beer so much that my blood would probably come out with a head on it, saw that I'm not supposed to drink it (beer, not blood, in which case I would be a vampire whose only meals are midnight snacks).
The first item in the "beverages and juices" part of the Low Oxalate Meal Plan, under the heading "avoid completely," is: "Beer: draft, stout (Guinness), lager, pilsner."
But when I looked over at the list of good beverages, I saw: "Beer, bottled."
At that point I needed a beer, bottled, because I was on a diet that contradicted even itself. At least I could use it to wash down an oxalate steak because beef is among the meats that are OK to eat.
I could also have beef with red wine, which I am not surprised is on the good beverage list because I have long considered it over-the-counter heart medicine.
Speaking of which, my second diet is called the Heart Healthy Meal Plan and is designed to lower my cholesterol.
I got the diet from a nurse who took my blood pressure (she kindly gave it back) and measured my cholesterol during a wellness fair at work.
Before I was put on medication, my cholesterol levels rivaled the gross national product of Finland. Now, the nurse said, my good cholesterol is good (and very polite, I might add), and my bad cholesterol isn't good but isn't as bad as it used to be.
To make it better, I am supposed to follow the Heart Healthy Meal Plan, which contracts the Low Oxalate Meal Plan because on the former I can eat peanut butter but not beef and on the latter I can eat beef but not peanut butter.
On my third meal plan, the High Fiber Diet, which I got from a nurse in a hospital where I recently had an endoscopy and a colonoscopy at the same time, I can have beans, which I am not supposed to have on the Low Oxalate Meal Plan, and I can have beef, which I can't have on the Heart Healthy Meal Plan.
I must admit that I am not a fan of vegetables, even though I am one, which makes it easy to ignore all three diets because I can have certain vegetables on one or more of them but not other veggies on one or more of either the same or opposing diets. So, to avoid confusion, as well as kidney stones, high cholesterol and a heart attack, I won't eat them at all.
My favorite meal plan is the High Fiber Diet because it allows me to have any beverage I want. That goes for beer. Whether bottled or draft, stout (Guinness), lager and pilsner, I don't know, but I am going to drink it anyway.
If you're on a diet these days, it's the only thing that makes any sense.
— Jerry Zezima
Jerry Zezima, who served on the faculty at the 2010 EBWW, writes a humor column for the Stamford Advocate that is nationally syndicated through the McClatchy-Tribune News Service and regularly appears in the Huffington Post. He's written two books, Leave it to Boomer and The Empty Nest Chronicles. He has won five humor-writing awards from the National Society of Newspaper Columnists and was named EBWW's Humor Writer of the Month twice. He is currently president of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists.
Have you ever thought about all the friends who have come and gone throughout your life?
If you are anywhere close to 50 in age, you should be able to relate to this post.
If you are in the 20-something to 30-something range, you might get some of it, but you'll also find yourself saying, "what?!?!"
If you are in the 70+ range, well, sorry you're pretty much on your own. I wasn't around back then in the "olden days," the time of my parents. You know, back when there were one or two televisions on a block, you turned a knob and got maybe three channels (if you were lucky), and the picture only came in black and white.
(For the 20-30 crowd, the definition of a "knob:" a rounded button for adjusting or controlling a machine. Synonyms: dial, button, "the knobs on the television.")
Back to friends. They come into and out of our lives, from preschool to death. Sometimes, when we're very lucky, the very special ones come into our life and NEVER leave. Have you ever thought of the categories of friendship?
• First Friends — These were the little kids you hung out with who lived on your block. They didn't necessarily fit the other categories, i.e., church or school. These were the kids who walked in and out your back door without ever knocking. They opened the fridge for a glass of milk or opened the cookie cupboard when they were hungry. When it was time to go home, they were called. Not on the phone — but the old-fashioned way with their mom standing in the doorway of their house hollering their name.
• Neighborhood Friends — These were usually a combination of first friends and school friends. Their proximity encompassed a larger square footage than just a single block. You would either walk or ride a bike over to their house. You probably knocked before walking in, but you still felt comfortable enough to open the fridge or help yourself to cookies. There was usually an overlap of parental friendship, too. Your parents were friends with their parents.
• Church Friends — Yep, pretty self explanatory. You saw them on Sundays and, for most Southerners, on Wednesdays, too.
• Early School Friends — They were the ones you saw Monday through Friday, nine months of the year, for the first nine years you went to school. (Kindergarten through middle school — or, in my case, junior high.) You knew them through all those awkward years, when everyone was at their not so finest. These were the times of self-cut hair because every class had at least one kid who got a hold of a pair of scissors. The best beautician (they weren't called stylists back then) couldn't cover up the damage done to their bangs. Ironically, it usually happened right before picture day. They'd forever be captured with bangs that started at the rootline of the forehead with giant chunks missing from all over their head. You saw these friends when they were eating paste, stuffing crayons up their noses, acting unruly, looking unkept, prepubescent, first period, chunky, chubby, skinny, short, tall, flat-chested, knobby kneed, training bras and pimples.
• High School Friends — These were the friends you bonded with because you chose to. Proximity didn't play into their selection. You had commonality. They "got you" and "you got them." These friendships ran deep. My high school identity could have been described as outspoken, social, nerdy, outgoing, preppy, artsy fartsy, theatrical, jock, honors, remedial, virgin (thank you, John G), speed freak (cars, not prescriptions), pin-up who didn't drink, cuss, or do drugs. In high school you where either the participant or recipient of bullies, cliques or clubs. Some of my greatest friendships originated in high school and continue to this day (so many, many, many moons past high school!), Wow, now that I see it written out — with the exception of being a non-virginal drinking cusser — my identity remains pretty much intact.
College Friends — You lived with them, studied with them, socialized with them, drank with them, laughed with them, cried with them and puked with them. You shared ramen, pizza and really bad cheap wine. They stood up with you, and for you, and after you graduated and were ready to settle down, they stood up beside you — when you said "I do."
• Adult Friends — By the time you are an adult with a kid or four under your belt, or on your gravy train, you've pretty much left your "work friends" at work. This leaves you to continue your friendships (if you're lucky) from any of the categories listed above and to meet and make new friends based on what's happening in your children's lives. You know those people. They are:
1) Parents of your children's friends
2) Parents in the PTA (These parents join the PTA in disguise. They are there because they are: a) desperate to get out of the house; b) desperate for adult interaction; c) desperate to avoid cooking and/or housework for an evening; or e) complete FREAKS of nature who truly enjoy endless meetings, fundraisers and dry cookies. Really, wouldn't a nice glass of wine promote a little more creativity at these planning and marketing meetings?)
3) Parents of your children's sports teams and activities. WARNING!! This category contains multi-dimensional sub-levels that I'm not even going to attempt to quantify.
I consider myself blessed. Blessed with every single friendship I've ever had. And blessed for the ones I've yet to make. In the words made famous by Mr. Rogers, "Would you be, could you be, my friend?"
— Michelle Davis Baker
Michelle Davis Baker considers herself an "Erma Bombeck student of life!" She is known by most as Momma Baker. She is a wife, birth mother to four sons and self-appointed adopted mother to hundreds. After all, love makes the world go round. Momma Baker was born in Michigan, graduated high school in Erma's old stomping ground of Centerville, Ohio, and considers Decatur, Ala., as her "forever" home — yet is a 30-year permanent visitor to Kansas City, Mo. If she's not in front of a computer writing, she's behind a camera shooting. You can check in on her at ErmaWhereAreYou.blogspot.com.
Are you disappearing?
Madam stopped in today to talk about our winter foray up North on the Gunflint Trail. Since food preparation is always top of mind for this snowy event, I figured she wanted to discuss my recent Pillsbury Bake Off winner. But she surprised me by opening our coffee klatch with a strange revelation:
"I'm invisible," she declared while pulling off her chopper's mitts and flumping on my horsehair lounger.
"Then why can I see you nibbling on one of my freshly baked nickerdoodles?" I inquired. "And, by the way, you're wearing Dickie coveralls and an earflap hat. That makes you pretty visible in a crowd, if you ask me."
She sighed deeply and eyed me as if I had grown a moustache.
Then I remembered reading on Wikipedia that humans start to shrink when they hit a certain age. Come to think of it, Madam did mention that she'd lost an inch or two over the last few years, but she's still 5'8," which seems visible enough.
Anyhoo, our Gunflint Trail planning session would have to wait. Instead I delicately asked Madam, "What was your first clue that you had become imperceptible?"
She pondered that for a moment. "It all started when the COSTCO checkout clerk handed me my grocery receipt and said, 'Thank you sir.'"
"Ah… do you think it had anything to do with that fetching earflap hat you're wearing? Or, perhaps COSTCO clerks aren't trained in how to assist mature females dressed in coveralls accessorized by spurs."
After holding forth about how countless horsewomen shop with their spurs on, she asked what I meant by mature females. This took me a moment.
"Then there was the hostess at Amy Lou's House of Pancakes," she quipped. "This woman could clearly see that I was next in line, yet she tossed the guy behind me a radiant smile and hauled him off to a table next to a sunny window. Or, how about last week when I got an audit notification from the IRS addressed to Mister M. Farr, Esquire?"
"Well, I suppose one could call that better news for you than for Mr. Farr," I added encouragingly. She was on a role.
"Last week Geno's Tru Test Glass delivered my new shower door to the Delrose family next door," she pressed on. And two of my clients forgot to pay me, probably because they forgot my name. Why, just last night, a friend and I went to see Fifty Shades of Grey, and the guy at the window sold me a children's ticket.
Oh dear, all this talk of vanishing caused me to wonder and worry. Was this an aging problem or a wardrobe problem? In either case, I'm getting a bit long in the tooth and short on the wardrobe, so it's high time that I get myself in front of a mirror to see that I haven't disappeared, too.
— Noah Vail
Noah Vail and Mary Farr have collaborated on a book, Never Say Neigh: An Adventure in Fun, Funny and the Power of You. Noah, author, philosopher, humorist, gin rummy ace and all-around "good news sort of guy," blogs here. Never Say Neigh won an honorable mention in the 2013 Paris Book Festival. Their newest book, When Your Plan A Bombs, is due out this spring.
50 shades of grey-haired dates
One would think that at my age the fact that Captain Crunch is not actually a captain wouldn't throw me and I would learn not to be naïve.
Can I still believe that Ms. Muffet actually sat on a Tuffet or was it a recliner? Was the tooth fairy a gimmick perpetrated by a dentist? If so, why isn't there remuneration when folks take out their dentures each evening?
When does the truth manifest itself in the dating world?
Have I been looking for love in all the wrong places?
Up until recently I thought I knew the secret. For those not currently in a smoochy relationship, the most popular meeting ground to find a partner seemed to be the line at any pharmacy.
I once overheard one man saying to a woman while gazing soulfully into her shopping cart, "Gas and heartburn pills? Gee whiz. Me, too!" Burping, they interlocked their carts and frolicked to check out. Perhaps the solution is to find someone with a similar malady and we could be on our way.
I used to prefer Internet dating compared to my previous pastime, which was singing "Love for Sale" at malls, with rouged cheeks wearing my Anna Lucasta, off-the-wrinkled shoulder gown. Since I became, um, a seasoned citizen, guys want me to pay for their parking and give them an appliance as well.
Surfing the Web is cheaper. I have met many interesting but sometimes unsuitable characters online.
My first responder was from "Schlemiels on Wheels." He arrived on skates. I had to grab onto the back of his jacket as we whizzed down the boulevard for the early bird special.
BTW, what brilliant advertising man came up with that title early bird? Worms?? Bleck!
My next computer match was a dermatologist. He wrote that famous book, "7 Solutions for Highly Itchy People." On Valentine's Day he bought me one long stem bottle of Calamine lotion. I scratched him off my list.
One nutty lover wanted me to call him Ida Lupino during coitus.
Another drank his wine from a "sippy cup."
Destiny intervened during my last connection and in a most unusual manner.
Having urged all seniors to practice safe sex, I myself usually wear a seat belt. But this one time, I did not. At the height of passion I whispered to my partner, "Are you comfortable?"
He answered in a suddenly strange accent, "I make a living."
I laughed so hard. I fell off the bed. Injured my back.
So now, as everything always works out as it should, I am currently dating my chiropractor.
He is truly nice, but very manipulating. To this very day though, he is still the only man I have ever allowed to place me in a headlock.
— Jan Marshall
Jan Marshall has devoted her life's work to humor and healing through books, columns and motivational speaking. As founder of the International Humor & Healing Institute, she worked with board members Norman Cousins, Steve Allen and other physicians and entertainers, including John Cleese. Her newest satirical survival book, Dancin' Schmancin' with the Scars: Finding the Humor No Matter What! is dedicated to Wounded Warriors, Gabrielle Giffords and Grieving Parents. She donates a percentage of the profits to these organizations as well as to the American Cancer Society and the American Brain Tumor Association.
A weighted matter
I just found out that for the bulk of my life, I have been exercising the wrong muscles. I am so depressed.
Years of leg lifts, squats and miles walked on the treadmill, all for naught. I just flipped through the new catalog of Self Care Products for Women and there it was — just in time for my birthday — a vaginal weight set!
The depressing part is that now, in addition to my thighs, buttocks, triceps and biceps, I have to worry about my hidden parts. I seriously thought they were in great shape. I think I may have even bragged about them at a party after a few glasses of wine. Why did I ever open that catalog?
In my family, we never discussed anything below the naval and above the knees. When my dad learned that my aunt was having surgery on her uterus, he asked her if that was close to her Sagittarius.
My mother never mentioned that my sisters and I needed to do Kegels or lift weights with our vaginas. When I was growing up, no one had ever even whispered the actual names of sexual organs at 245 Willow Avenue.
Now, there it was in plain print — the word vaginal!
Women didn't have to concern themselves with this stuff in the old days. Just once, I'd like to open the Sunday paper's fashion section and read, "Scarlett O'Hara hoop dresses are back this season."
Oh! I would be such a happy lady! Imagine not having to suck in my stomach, tuck in my derriere or lift those damned vaginal weights. The hoop dress would hide everything below my waist. Actually, I might need to invest in a corset for above my waist.
The only requirement to look good in a hoop dress is a full bust, and every woman knows that if you just gain a few pounds, your bust increases. With the scooped neckline so low, my husband wouldn't even notice if I had a double chin. I doubt he'd even notice I had a face!
So now, in addition to working, cooking, cleaning, carpooling and my mending (I just slipped that in for Scarlett), I have to tend to more body parts. The ad men had struck again; it's just one more reminder that I'm not good enough just as I am.
The set only costs $125 and includes a leather carrying case. I envisioned the old "Don't leave home without it" commercials for American Express. The ad also offered me free shipping if I ordered an extra set for a friend. I guess they don't realize that I wouldn't have a friend left in the world if I started giving vaginal weight sets as gifts.
The ad assures me that I'll be less embarrassed, more confident and have more control over my life. They swear that the weights are foolproof.
I think I'd be more embarrassed and less confident if I didn't already exercise my self-control and profess that I, too, am foolproof. Who would ever think that bodybuilding a strong vagina could make such a difference in a woman's life?
As Rhett Butler would say, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!"
— Anne Bardsley
Anne Bardsley, of St. Petersburg, Fla., is the author of How I Earned My Wrinkles, a collection of humorous and sentimental stories about marriage, motherhood and menopause. She lives in a menopausal world with a husband who gives her wrinkles. When people ask her age, she sometimes tells them her bra size. "36-C," she says, "was a wonderful age."


text:
Retrieval of geophysical parameters from Moderate Resolution Imaging Spectroradiometer thermal infrared data: evaluation of a two-step physical algorithm
Applied Optics, Vol. 39, Issue 20, pp. 3537-3550 (2000)
Enhanced HTML Acrobat PDF (716 KB)
A two-step physical algorithm that simultaneously retrieves geophysical parameters from Moderate Resolution Imaging Spectroradiometer (MODIS) measurements was developed. The retrieved geophysical parameters include atmospheric temperature–humidity profile, surface skin temperature, and two surface emissivities within the shortwave (3–5-µm) and the longwave (8–14.5-µm) regions. The physical retrieval is accomplished in two steps: (i) The Tikhonov regularization method is employed to generate a regularization solution along with an optimum regularization parameter; (ii) the nonlinear Newtonian iteration algorithm is carried out with the regularization solution as a first-guess profile to obtain a final maximum probability solution for geophysical parameters. The algorithm was tested with both simulated and real MODIS Airborne Simulator (MAS) data. Sensitivity studies on simulated MAS data demonstrate that simultaneous retrievals of land and atmospheric parameters improve the accuracy of the retrieved geophysical parameters. Finally, analysis and accuracy of retrievals from real MAS data are discussed.
© 2000 Optical Society of America
OCIS Codes
(030.5620) Coherence and statistical optics : Radiative transfer
(280.0280) Remote sensing and sensors : Remote sensing and sensors
Original Manuscript: September 3, 1999
Revised Manuscript: April 28, 2000
Published: July 10, 2000
Xia L. Ma, Zhengming Wan, Christopher C. Moeller, W. Paul Menzel, Liam E. Gumley, and Yulin Zhang, "Retrieval of geophysical parameters from Moderate Resolution Imaging Spectroradiometer thermal infrared data: evaluation of a two-step physical algorithm," Appl. Opt. 39, 3537-3550 (2000)
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- V. V. Salomonson, W. L. Barnes, P. W. Maymon, H. E. Montgomery, H. Ostrow, "MODIS: advanced facility instrument for studies of the Earth as a system," IEEE Trans. Geosci. Remote Sens. 27, 145–153 (1998). [CrossRef]
- M. D. King, W. P. Menzel, P. S. Grant, J. S. Myers, G. T. Arnold, S. E. Platnick, L. E. Gumley, S. C. Tsay, C. C. Moeller, M. Fitzgerald, K. S. Brown, F. G. Osterwisch, "Airborne scanning spectrometer for remote sensing of cloud, aerosol, water vapor, and surface properties," J. Atmos. Ocean. Technol. 13, 777–794 (1996). [CrossRef]
- W. P. Menzel, L. E. Gumley, "MODIS atmospheric profile retrieval algorithm theoretical basis document," (Earth Observing System Project Science Office, NASA Goddard Space Flight Center, Greenbelt, Md., 1998).
- S. A. Clough, M. J. Iacono, "Line-by-line calculations of atmospheric fluxes and cooling rates. 2. Applications to carbon dioxide, ozone, methane, nitrous oxide and the halocarbons," J. Geophys. Res. 100, 16519–16535 (1995). [CrossRef]
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, A. J. Schriener, "Simultaneous retrieval of surface and atmospheric parameters: a physical and analytically direct approach," in Advances in Remote Sensing Retrieval Method, A. Deepak, H. E. Flemming, M. T. Chahine, eds. (Deepak, Hampton, Va., 1985), pp. 221–232.
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, H. B. Howell, H.-L. Huang, H. E. Revercomb, "The simultaneous retrieval of atmospheric temperature and water vapor profiles—application to measurements with the high spectral resolution interferometer sounder (HIS)," in Advances in Remote Sensing Retrieval Methods, A. Deepak, H. E. Flemming, J. S. Theon, eds. (Deepak, Hampton, Va., 1989), pp. 189–202.
- W. L. Smith, H. E. Revercomb, H. B. Howell, H.-L. Huang, R. O. Knuteson, E. W. Koenig, D. D. LaPorte, S. Silverman, L. A. Sromovsky, H. M. Woolf, "GHIS—the GOES high-resolution interferometer sounder," J. Appl. Meteorol. 29, 1189–1204 (1990). [CrossRef]
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, H. E. Revercomb, "Linear simultaneous solution for temperature and observing constituent profiles from radiance spectra," Appl. Opt. 30, 1117–1123 (1991). [CrossRef] [PubMed]
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, C. M. Hayden, A. J. Schreiner, "The simultaneous retrieval export package," presented at the Second International TOVS Study Conference, Igls, Austria, 18–22 February 1985 (Cooperative Institute for Meteorological Satellite Studies, University of Wisconsin—Madison, Madison, Wis., 1985), pp. 224–253.
- H.-L. Huang, "An analysis of the characteristics of the atmospheric profiles obtained with the High-Resolution Interferometer Sounder (HIS)," Ph.D. dissertation (University of Wisconsin—Madison, Madison, Wis., 1989).
- C. H. Hayden, "GOES-VAS simultaneous temperature-moisture retrieval algorithm," J. Appl. Meteorol. 27, 705–733 (1988). [CrossRef]
- T. Schmidt, National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration/National Environmental Satellite, Data, and Information Service, Office of Research and Applications, Advanced Satellite Products Team, Madison, Wis. 53706 (personal communication, 2000).
- Y. Plokhenko, W. P. Menzel, "The effects of surface reflection on estimating the vertical temperature–humidity distribution from spectral infrared measurements," J. Appl. Meteorol. 39, 3–14 (2000). [CrossRef]
- Z. M. Wan, J. Dozier, "A generalized split-window algorithm for retrieving land-surface temperature from space," IEEE Trans. Geosci. Remote Sens. 34, 892–905 (1996). [CrossRef]
- Z. M. Wan, Z. L. Li, "A physics-based algorithm for retrieving land-surface emissivity and temperature from EOS/MODIS data," IEEE Trans. Geosci. Remote Sens. 35, 980–996 (1997). [CrossRef]
- B. Huang, "New approach to simultaneous retrieval of atmospheric profiles from radiance spectra," Ph.D. dissertation (University of Wisconsin—Madison, Madison, Wis., 1998).
- X. L. Ma, T. J. Schmit, W. L. Smith, "A non-linear physical retrieval algorithm—its application to the GOES-8/9 sounder," J. Appl. Meteorol. 38, 501–513 (1999). [CrossRef]
- J. Li, H. L. Huang, "Retrieval of atmospheric profiles from satellite sounder measurements by use of the discrepancy principle," Appl. Opt. 38, 916–923 (1999). [CrossRef]
- J. R. Eyre, "Inversion of cloudy satellite sounding radiances by nonlinear optimal estimation. I. Theory and simulation for TOVS," Q. J. R. Meteorol. Soc. 115, 1001–1026 (1989). [CrossRef]
- J. R. Eyre, "Inversion of cloudy satellite sounding radiances by nonlinear optimal estimation. II. Application to TOVS data," Q. J. R. Meteorol. Soc. 115, 1027–1037 (1989). [CrossRef]
- W. L. Smith, H. L. Huang, M. S. Whipple, S. P. Ho, "UW-CIMSS physical retrieval system science document for AIRS/AMSU/MHS," (Jet Propulsion Laboratory, NASA, Pasedena, Calif., 1996).
- O. B. Toon, R. C. Miake-Lye, "Subsonic aircraft: contrail and cloud effects special study (SUCCESS)," Geophys. Res. Lett. 25, 1109–1112 (1998). [CrossRef]
- W. L. Smith, R. O. Knuteson, H. E. Revercomb, W. Feltz, H. B. Howell, W. P. Menzel, N. R. Nalli, O. Brown, J. Brown, P. Minnett, W. McKeown, "Observations of the infrared radiative properties of the ocean-implications for the measurement of sea surface temperature via satellite remote sensing," Bull. Am. Meteorol. Soc. 77, 41–51 (1996). [CrossRef]
- W. C. Snyder, Z. M. Wan, Y. L. Zhang, Y. Z. Feng, "Thermal infrared (3–14 µm) bidirectional reflectance measurements of sands and soils," Remote Sens. Environ. 60, 101–109 (1997). [CrossRef]
- J. Li, "Temperature and water vapor weighting functions from radiative transfer equation with surface emissivity and solar reflectivity," Adv. Atmos. Sci. 11, 421–426 (1994). [CrossRef]
- The 40 levels for the MAS aircraft pressure coordinates are as follows: 50, 60, 70, 75, 80, 85, 90, 100, 125, 150, 175, 200, 250, 300, 350, 400, 450, 500, 550, 600, 620, 640, 660, 680, 700, 720, 740, 760, 780, 800, 820, 840, 860, 880, 900, 920, 940, 960, 980, and 1000 hPa.
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, "The use of eigenvectors of statistical covariance matrices for interpreting satellite sounding radiometer observations," J. Atmos. Sci. 33, 1127–1140 (1976). [CrossRef]
- A. N. Tikhonov, "Solution of incorrectly formulated problems and the regularization method," Sov. Math. Dokl. 4, 1035–1038 (1963).
- A. N. Tikhonov, "Regularization of incorrectly posed problems," Sov. Math. Dokl. 4, 1624–1627 (1963).
- A. N. Tikhonov, V. Y. Arsenin, Solutions of Ill-Posed Problems (Winston, Washington, D.C., 1977).
- A. N. Tikhonov, A. V. Goncharsky, V. V. Stepanov, A. G. Yagola, Numerical Methods for the Solution of Ill-Posed Problems (Kluwer, Dordrecht, the Netherlands, 1995). [CrossRef]
- G. Bachus, F. Gillbert, "Uniqueness in the inversion of inaccurate gross earth data," Philos. Trans. R. Soc. London Ser. A 266, 123–192 (1970). [CrossRef]
- S. Twomey, "On the numerical solution of Fredholm integral equations of the first kind by the inversion of the linear system produced by quadrature," J. Assoc. Comput. Math. 10, 97–101 (1963). [CrossRef]
- C. D. Rodgers, "Retrieval of atmospheric temperature and composition from remote measurements of thermal radiation," Rev. Geophys. Space Phys. 14, 609–624 (1976). [CrossRef]
- P. C. Hansen, "Rank-deficient and discrete ill-posed problems," Ph.D. dissertation (Technical University of Denmark, Lyngby, Denmark, 1996).
- G. Wahba, "Ill-posed problems: numerical and statistical methods for mildly, moderately and severely ill-posed problems with noise data," Tech. Rep.595, (Statistics Department, University of Wisconsin-Madison, Madison, Wis., 1980).
- G. Wahba, Spline Methods for Observational Data, Vol. 59 of CBMS-NSF Regional Conference Series in Applied Mathematics (Society for Industrial and Applied Mathematics, Philadelphia, Pa., 1990).
- J. R. Eyre, "A fast radiative transfer model for satellite sounding systems," Tech. Memo176, (European Centre for Medium-Range Weather Forecast, Reading, UK, 1991).
- S. Hannon, L. L. Strow, W. W. McMillan, "Atmospheric infrared fast transmittance model: a comparison of two approaches," in Optical Spectroscopic Techniques and Instrumentation for Atmospheric and Space Research II, P. B. Hays, J. Wang, eds., Proc. SPIE2830, 94–105 (1996). [CrossRef]
- H. M. Woolf, P. V. Delst, W. J. Zhang, "NOAA-15 HIRS/3 and AMSU transmittance model validation," in Proceedings of the Tenth International TOVS Study (Bureau of Metrology Resource Center, Melbourne, 1999), pp. 564–573.
- J. Wang, G. P. Anderson, H. E. Revercomb, R. O. Knuteson, "Validation of FASCODE3 and MODTRAN3: comparison of model calculations with ground-based and airborne interferometer observations under clear-sky conditions," Appl. Opt. 35, 6028–6040 (1996). [CrossRef] [PubMed]
- J. W. Salisbury, D. M. D'Aria, "Emissivity of terrestrial materials in the 8–14 µm atmospheric window," Remote Sens. Environ. 42, 83–106 (1992). [CrossRef]
- J. W. Salisbury, D. M. D'Aria, "Emissivity of terrestrial materials in the 3–5 µm atmospheric window," Remote Sens. Environ. 47, 345–361 (1994). [CrossRef]
- W. L. Smith, H. M. Woolf, P. G. Abel, C. M. Hayden, M. Chalfant, N. Grody, "NIMBUS-5 sounder data processing system. Part 1. Measurement characteristics and data reduction procedures," NOAA Tech. Memo NESS57 (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, Washington, D.C., 1974), pp. 36–41.
- C. M. Hayden, T. J. Schmit, "Initial evaluation of the GOES-8 sounder," presented at the Ninth Symposium on Meteorological Observations and Instrumentation Charlotte, N.C., 27–31 March 1995 (American Meteorological Society, Boston, Mass., 1995), pp. 385–390.
- C. J. Tucker, "Red and photographic infrared linear combinations for monitoring vegetation," Remote Sens. Environ. 8, 127–150 (1979). [CrossRef]
- C. O. Justice, J. R. G. Townshend, B. N. Holben, C. J. Tucker, "Analysis of the phenology of global vegetation using meteorological satellite data," Int. J. Remote Sens. 6, 1271–1318 (1985). [CrossRef]
- F. J. Schmidlin, "WMO international radiosonde comparison, phase II," , in Instruments and Observing Methods, (World Meteorological Organisation, Geneva, Switzerland, 1985), pp. 1–113; available from WMO Secretariat, 41 Avenue Giuseppe Motta, Case Postale 2300, CH-1211 Geneva 2, Switzerland.
- C. G. Wade, "An evaluation of problems affecting measurement of low relative humidity on the United States radiosonde," J. Atmos. Ocean. Technol. 11, 687–700 (1994). [CrossRef]
- R. W. Pratt, "Review of radiosonde humidity and temperature errors," J. Atmos. Ocean. Technol. 2, 404–407 (1985). [CrossRef]
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
I was a police officer in a NJ City. Mr Historian. Starting in 1974. Nothing has changed.. I beg your pardon..Things have changed for inner city residents. Things have gotten worse... People who lived in abject poverty 40 years ago are still living in abject poverty.....
Sheez... Maybe you could come down off your lofty perch and take a ride thru Jersey City,Newark,Camden,Detroit,Baltimore,Oakland and see for yourself.
The Repubs should erect this billboard in every city....
You have voted Democrat For the last 50 years
And NOTHING has changed for you.
Or something o that effect
It is ideas,ideology and accomplishments.. That is why there is tremendous support and admiration from Conservatives and many Libertarians I would imagine, for Dr Carson, Allen West and Comdi Rice, to name names. They have an actual track record of accomplishment. They understand what Consevatives understand. It if liberty,freedom, and the power of the individual to take responsibility and make something out of themselves. Buffoons like Ockefeller and Crist have no game , and must race bait and intentionally try to divide Americans. That is a tired old game and that dog just won't hunt any longer.
I have children in college. Is it asking too much that they just be educated in Math, Science, Literature, and just mind their own business? Do they have to be subjected to all this nonsense? Very very expensive nonsense?
They pay fees...ranchers and oil companies, pay fees to the Federal Govt. as for Mr Bundy, his family has been there since 1870, long before many American families emigrated here. Exactly why should he pay fees for land he has been grazing on for 143 years, in scrub brush no one gives a rats rear end about? This is just another example of the Federal govt getting in the pocket of productive citizens. There used to be 53 ranching families in the are, now it's down to his, due to these exorbitant fees. Have you checked the price of beef at the store? There is an economic coincidence between LESS RANCHERS and Higher Prices.
The government, and Politicans and Adminsitrators routinely flaunt the law and they wonder when citizens say enough? We have immigration laws that this Administration has said it will not enforce. Charlie Rangel, he of the House way s and means committee that writes lax law, decided he would not report his taxes accurately.Ditto fo Tsy Secretary Tim Geithner, head of the IRS , who also did not lawfully report his taxes. the thugs who intimidated voters in Philadelphia got a pass. Lois Lerner appears to at least be getting cover from the Feds, Obamacare was rammed down our throats with funny business in Nebraska and Louisiana and now, the Executive, the guy who is supposed to execute laws, unilaterally changes them at his whim.. .Mr Bundys family has been on this land since the 1870s and now, the BLM, created in the 1990s, seeks to apply endangered species laws for a tortoise that survived herds of bison trampling them for centuries? A the point of a gun and with little men with big dogs? We are a Nation built in the Rule of Law. The government cannot enforce only those laws they deem politically expedient or convenient.
I believe we funded and trained the Mujahadeen, NOT the Taliban. To connect Reagan, who left office in 1988 with the Taliban in the late 90's and Bin Laden in 1993 and then 2001 is a bit of a stretch.Once Bin laden began his shenanigans (on Clintons watch) there were ample opportunities to take him out. Reagan was undoubtedly the best President in my 58 years, no one is remotely close. he took down the Soviet Union freeing millions, he cuts taxe and regulations and unleashed the American Machine, which rocked for 25 years. Ronald Reagan is a Western icon and is beyond reproach. It's a rough and nasty world and he did what he needed to do
Well said. For what my 2 cents are worth.
Who knows? They must speak a different language at Harvard and Columbia...O is the genius who refers to Pakistan ....as in PACK...ISTAN. as POCKYSTON right? What an alternate. Universe these ivy leaguers inhabit
If we really want to hurt the Russian oligarchs we should have them join ObamaCare
I think to cast a voters to where your tax dollars will be spent, you need to 1st actually be a taxpayer... People who get free stuff will vote for more free stuff. Those who pay...the taxpayer....mill make sure his or her dollars are being well spent.


text:
Former NY Knickerbocker, Anthony Mason, dead at 48.
posted by NoMich at 09:31 AM on February 28
Just watched the highlights. Oh. My. God. Too bad the World Cup is half way around the world. I'm able to watch a few overs before needing to go to bed.
posted by NoMich at 08:59 AM on February 28
Punching a small girl in the face?
Oh...that's bad? Wait, you're Canadian. That's probably bad up there.
posted by NoMich at 09:41 PM on February 25
owlhouse: there's also crictime
Thanks for the link, Mr B. I'll definitely be checking it out when I can later on today.
posted by NoMich at 08:06 AM on February 18
I love watching rugby. It's all calvinball to me but still fun to watch. It feels like a backyard football game among friends where new moves keep getting added to the game and stick around only if nobody objects. My favorite is the inbound pass that features a guy getting lifted 15 feet in the air by his teammates.
posted by NoMich at 09:48 PM on February 17
Points, rebounds, assists, Tony Awards.
posted by NoMich at 10:27 PM on February 13
Most quadruple doubles?
posted by NoMich at 10:25 PM on February 13
Man, if I hadn't screwed up Week 1 so badly, I might've won this damn thing. Good times, though, so thanks for doing this.
posted by NoMich at 02:29 PM on February 12
Dean Smith and a civil rights legacy (published in 2011)
Dean Smith's courage (published in 2013)
Smith spurred social change beyond basketball
posted by NoMich at 07:46 AM on February 09
Pffft!! The NFL Seattle Seahawks have been doing this 12th man thing since the 19-teens. At least.
posted by NoMich at 03:20 PM on February 05
Very large image of all Formula 1 cars 1950 to 2004.
Oh man, those McLarens from '68. /drool
posted by NoMich at 09:37 PM on February 03
Just in case rcade fire officially changes the quarters by score rule:
1st Quarter: 7 (SEA 7 - NE 0)
2nd Quarter: 21 (NE 14 - SEA 7)
3rd Quarter: 31 (SEA 17 - NE 14)
4th Quarter: 45 (SEA 24 - NE 21)
Good gravy, that sounds like a boring game. Sorry y'all!
posted by NoMich at 01:07 PM on February 01
Is anyone picking a winner against your rooting interest?
To be honest, I'm not all that interested in this year's Game. Seattle won it last year and I'm just flat out sick of seeing the Patriots on my TV, but I'll peep in here and there just to see how well my picks turn out. However, when The Great British Baking Show is on at 8:00 tonight, you bet your life I'll be tuned in.
posted by NoMich at 08:22 AM on February 01
Seattle by 3
Most Passing Yards: Brady
Most rushing Yards: Lynch
Most Receiving Yards: Gronkowski
First Touchdown: R. Wilson
Sack: Avril
Interception: McCourty
Total Score: 45
1st Quarter: 7
Halftime: 21
3rd Quarter: 31
posted by NoMich at 04:28 PM on January 31
Well, it's still weird to me and none of your fancy pants ivy league facts and stats won't change that.
posted by NoMich at 10:17 AM on January 28
It's a shame that Brodeur's career ends the same way as other NHL HOFers like Salming and Modano, clinging to one more season of play wearing an unfamiliar jersey.
Bobby Orr in a 'Hawks uniform would like to have a word with you. Joe Namath in a Rams uniform wants to kiss you.
posted by NoMich at 08:46 AM on January 28
Having grown up in Florida, I hate it when they frickin' name a storm in January. Hurricane season ends in late November. And it's even worse when they dip into Roman mythology. Winter Storm Juno? Really? Let's have a real live woman's name. OK, or man's name. I'll bet there are darned few babies in the South that have been named Camille since 1969.
The naming of blizzards is coming from the Weather Channel. The National Weather service has nothing to do with the namings and refuses to acknowledge them. Rest easy, my friend.
Oh, and I do have a friend named Camille because of the legendary hurricane, but funnily enough, she's from North Dakota. However, I know her from down here in North Carolina.
posted by NoMich at 02:14 PM on January 27
Hey, those kids are pretty good. Some NHL teams should give them try-outs. Except that Crosby kid was travelling there at the beginning.
posted by NoMich at 04:47 PM on January 23
Caption for the first photo in fatty's link:
Marshawn Lynch's $20,000 fine for grabbing his crotch after scoring a touchdown in the AFC Championship was too light, Phil Mushnick writes.
I can't believe that Mr. Lynch got off so lightly by the NFL. Shit, I can't even believe that security didn't apprehend him and toss him in jail. And how the eff did he get to the Boston area so quickly after the NFC Championship game?
posted by NoMich at 10:44 AM on January 23
Badger running back, Melvin Gordon (no, not *that* Melvin Gordon), declared for the NFL draft and wrote a nice thank you letter to the fans of the school.
posted by NoMich at 09:55 AM on January 22
Peppers was prolly thinking, "HAY JUST LIKE IN CHARLOTTE I CAN TAKE THE REST OF THE GAME OFF!!!!"
posted by NoMich at 09:13 PM on January 20
Looks like he was told to lay down.
posted by NoMich at 08:58 PM on January 20
Soooo...has the shipped sailed on that punt, pass, and kick competition idea to settle the game?
posted by NoMich at 09:11 PM on January 19
Punt, pass, and kick competition.
posted by NoMich at 11:14 AM on January 19
Seattle by 6
New England 13
Most points: New England
Most prolific passer: Brady
Most prolific runner: Lynch
Most prolific receiver: Gronks
posted by NoMich at 08:42 AM on January 17
Denver gives ol' Foxy the ol' heave-ho.
posted by NoMich at 06:58 PM on January 12
I was only kind of pissed that the Panthers lost to Seattle last night because, well, Russell.
posted by NoMich at 08:37 PM on January 11
When Chancellor did that the second time, it seems like one of his teammates was grabbing a Panther by his mask and pulling him to the ground, allowing Chancellor to leap over him. Was I just seeing things?
posted by NoMich at 12:21 PM on January 11
Balmer by 5
Seattle by 9
Green Bay by 4
Denver by 12
Most points: Denver
Rushing: D Murray (DALLAS)
Sack: V Miller (DENVER)
Green Bay temperature: 264.817 Kelvin
posted by NoMich at 12:10 PM on January 10
Stan van Gundy telling his Pistons to form a fucking wall. vine link
posted by NoMich at 01:10 PM on January 07
That's cuz yr a noob
posted by NoMich at 10:52 AM on January 04
Just now seeing this.
Cowboys by 6
Bengals by 12
Most points: Cowboys
Most yards: Romo
Interceptions: Reggie Nelson
posted by NoMich at 09:32 AM on January 04
The only prayer I ever offer up these days is a plea that Skip's brother isn't nearly the db that he is. I get a slight db vibe from Rick with his cooking show, but it's excusable as he has a real, tangible skill in life. Plus, he has his daughter on his show. Maybe one day I'll have my own TV show in which I work with my daughter.
posted by NoMich at 09:44 AM on December 30
I can see Chicago hiring Ryan and the Jets hiring the guy that just got fired in Atlanta.
posted by NoMich at 04:36 PM on December 29
Two minutes in the penalty box!
posted by NoMich at 04:33 PM on December 29
The boxing day test match between Australia and India is happening right now, but I can't find a working stream. *sigh*
On edit: found one! There's also New Zealand v Sri Lanka.
posted by NoMich at 09:56 PM on December 25
*sigh* fire up chips *sigh*
posted by NoMich at 11:29 PM on December 24
Y'all need to cease eating so many ghost pepper empanadas right before bedtime.
posted by NoMich at 10:18 AM on December 23
Aaaand it's just gotten out of hand. I guess I won't be talking about this part of the match with my India co-workers tomorrow.
posted by NoMich at 11:02 PM on December 18
Ugh. I still get the types of cricket confused. This is test. The innings isn't over until India gets those last two wickets. However, they should get them soon, right? Either way, exciting run by Australia.
posted by NoMich at 10:45 PM on December 18
Make that, India needs only two wickets, but Australia only needs 10 runs. This is exciting.
posted by NoMich at 10:38 PM on December 18
Make that, India needs only three wickets.
posted by NoMich at 10:32 PM on December 18
Make that, Australia needs less than 20 runs.
posted by NoMich at 10:26 PM on December 18
I'm trying to go to bed, but this India v Australia test match is at a good place. Australia needs less than 40 runs to end the first innings, but India needs only four wickets to end the first innings. Bonus points for Ishant Sharma looking like a black metal dude while bowling.
posted by NoMich at 10:03 PM on December 18
That was a really bad time to switch from the Wings to the Hurricanes.
Tell me about it. Except for a few bright spots, and one blindingly bright spot, it's been a very bad time to switch from the Wings to the Hurricanes. But, there you have it. I love my 'Canes, even right now when I want them to blow the whole thing up and start over somehow.
posted by NoMich at 01:50 PM on December 18
That is some wonderful writing, owly. Thanks for sharing. My favorite:
Smith and Marsh tuck their bats under their armpits and stride off the ground like they've just been excused from a trigonometry test.
This right here gives cricket the edge over a sport I grew up loving.
posted by NoMich at 08:17 AM on December 18
We need more information to determine if your switch was acceptable.
Did you have local radio broadcasts of the Wings before you got cable TV?
Did you ever make liberal use of the term "we" to describe the successes of the team?
Never any local radio for Wings games up north during my youth. There might be now, but not back then.
I never use the royal "we" for any of my sports team.
For the other Michigan pro sports teams:
- I am a fan of the Panthers, but when they meet up with the Lions, it's the Lions all the way for me.
- I am a fan of the Cubs, but I'm a Tigers fan through and through. Ernie Harwell's voice *is* my childhood.
- The '90s Bulls pretty much killed my interest in the NBA. The only time I care about the NBA now is if the Pistons are relevant.
posted by NoMich at 08:23 PM on December 17
I was able to do it with the Carolina Hurricanes:
- My part of the northern lower peninsula of Michigan does not really have a hockey tradition. When I was a wee lad, the only local organized team hockey was played in Traverse City, which is too far away from Crapholeville that is my hometown.
- You had to have cable TV to catch any Red Wings games. When I was a wee lad, not very many people had cable TV.
- No one north of (probably) Lansing gave a rat's ass about the Wings until they became a powerhouse in the '90s.
- There was no rink built in Crapholeville that is my hometown.
Once I got cable TV, I could watch the Wings, but it was only in passing and I couldn't really get into them until I got into college and my Fudgie roommates had to explain the game to me. Once I understood the game, I became a fan of the Wings, but because there wasn't a real tradition there for me there was nothing really concrete about that fandom and that allowed the Hurricanes to take root starting in '97.
Does that work for you guys? Is that acceptable?
posted by NoMich at 03:36 PM on December 17
Reminder: The Cubs won the 2015 World Series in 'Back to the Future 2'
posted by NoMich at 08:23 PM on December 10
"Ice up son" was a Steve Smith thing.
posted by NoMich at 10:03 PM on December 09
Dumb Question Alert:
Why kill the program altogether? Why not just drop down to Division II or III?
posted by NoMich at 01:25 PM on December 07
I find it pretty funny that North Carolina is covered in Tar Heel blue. Yeah, no. Down East should be ECU purple and there should be a lot more Wolfpack red throughout the state.
posted by NoMich at 11:07 AM on December 06
This room must be really dusty! There's something in my eye!
We took our little girl to a Toys R Us last night and had her pick out a toy for a toy drive. She actually did really good and found two toys that she really wanted to share. She didn't even give us any shit for not buying her anything as well. Not bad for a four year old.
posted by NoMich at 08:49 PM on December 03
In a somewhat related Reuters news article from this past April (just before the T20 World Cup final), the mentioned:
After learning that the 10 most highly viewed Internet streams on its Internet-only network ESPN3, were of cricket matches, regularly beating out college football and basketball, executives considered putting it on TV.
posted by NoMich at 10:44 AM on November 28
Tributes from Kolkata and Islamabad.
posted by NoMich at 10:55 AM on November 27
Besides, Bose > Beats any day of the week.
There's a guy on my team at work that was so pumped about getting a pair of Beats, he was having all of us check them out. Like a dick, I swapped out the Beats with my Klipsch headphones and he got very sad, especially since he paid more for his headphones.
posted by NoMich at 09:50 PM on November 26
posted by NoMich at 01:09 PM on November 24
From the article:
Blum's office did not respond to interview requests left with Blum's spokesman by The Dispatch. It's unclear how Johnson's family came to know him or why he was making a personal loan at a high interest rate.
One day after the home loan was signed, on March 10, 2011, the Johnsons borrowed $2 million at an interest rate of 12 percent from a software developer in Iowa named Rodney L. Blum, who this month won a seat in the U.S. House.
What the eff? Why? I just don't get why you would get a high-interest loan from some shmoe on the street. And of course this shmoe is now a House Rep.
posted by NoMich at 05:51 PM on November 21


text:
Hypothyroidism - Exams and Tests
A thorough medical history and physical exam are the first steps in diagnosing hypothyroidism or mild (subclinical) hypothyroidism. If the results lead your doctor to suspect you have hypothyroidism or subclinical hypothyroidism, you will have tests to confirm the diagnosis.
Blood tests are always used to confirm a diagnosis of hypothyroidism or mild hypothyroidism. The tests used most often are:
By Hallie Levine Sklar Maybe The Reason You're Not Reaching Your Goals Is…You. How To Know, And Simple Ways To Stop Sabotaging Yourself Last week, I hit the supermarket and loaded up on all my favorite junk foods: Krispy Kreme donuts, frozen pizza, and Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey ice cream. It's not for me—it's for my husband, I rationalized, as I pushed the cart up and down the aisles. Never mind that my husband was going on a business trip the next day, or that I work from...
Read the Are You Your Own Worst Enemy? article > >
If the above tests are not normal, antithyroid antibody tests may determine whether you have the autoimmune disease Hashimoto's thyroiditis, in which the body's defense system attacks the thyroid gland.
In rare cases, a thyroid ultrasound may be used to evaluate a thyroid gland that during a physical exam seems to be abnormal.
A computed tomography (CT) scan or magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) of the hypothalamus or pituitary gland may be done to look for any changes in these areas of the brain.
Early detection
Because of the possibility of intellectual disability in infants with hypothyroidism, every state in the United States tests newborns for hypothyroidism. If your baby was not born in a hospital, or if you believe your baby may not have been tested, talk to your doctor. Screening tests for hypothyroidism are not always accurate. Even if test results show no problem, watch your child for symptoms of hypothyroidism, such as poor appetite, not gaining weight, and dry skin.
Some doctors now recommend routine testing for people at risk for hypothyroidism, including:
- People age 35 and older. The American Thyroid Association guidelines recommend that screening begin at age 35 and continue every 5 years thereafter.3
- People with one or more close relatives who have or had hypothyroidism.
- People with conditions associated with Hashimoto's thyroiditis, including Addison's disease, rheumatoid arthritis, pernicious anemia, and type 1 diabetes.
- Pregnant women. In pregnant women known to have hypothyroidism, tests should be done at regular intervals to determine whether the dosage of thyroid hormone medicine is adequate.
- Women who are having symptoms of hypothyroidism after pregnancy (postpartum hypothyroidism), such as depression, memory and concentration problems, or thyroid enlargement (goiter). Women who have had hypothyroidism during or after pregnancy should be retested if they become pregnant again.
Not all experts agree on whether to recommend widespread screening for hypothyroidism. Some groups say there is not enough evidence of benefit to recommend screening for everyone. But people who are at high risk—women older than 60 and anyone with a family history of thyroid disease or who has other autoimmune diseases—may want to be screened.4
In this article
This information is produced and provided by the National Cancer Institute (NCI). The information in this topic may have changed since it was written. For the most current information, contact the National Cancer Institute via the Internet web site at http:// cancer .gov or call 1-800-4-CANCER.
WebMD Medical Reference from Healthwise
Hypothyroidism Topics
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Nice smooth ass, taint, cock, and balls! Hairless is a perfect look for a cucky! Juding from how he takes that ball and black dildo up his hot ass, I'd think he's taken some big black cock already!


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Bitburger Unhappy With FIFA Decision Cycling Race Forced To Withdraw Poster Ladbrokes Fans Take On Digital Role Innovate Aquires Wexford Park Rights Dunkin' Donuts Sorry For Mock LFC Crest Man City Signs Deal With Surf Soccer Santos Partners With Air France Man City Waits On Outcome Of FFP Case Chelsea Signs $308M Deal With Yokohama Marketplace Roundup
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SBD Global/July 19, 2013/Marketing and Sponsorship
Newcastle's Cissé Pulls Out Of Pre-Season Tour Due To Wonga Sponsorship Dispute
Published July 19, 2013
UNCERTAIN FUTURE: In London, Martin Hardy reported the compromise so far has been to officially let Cissé "remain in the North-east for the following week and train on his own." However, that "uneasy truce will be cast into further doubt when Newcastle return from their base in Portugal next Wednesday." At that point, Newcastle seems "certain to look for ways to offload the forward, or risk a potentially damaging row with the PFA and the individual rights of one of their players" (INDEPENDENT, 7/18). The AFP reported other sports teams "have made concessions to the faith of their Muslim players." South Africa cricketer Hashim Amla is "allowed to wear shirts without the logo of team sponsor Castle Lager because of the Islamic prohibition on drinking alcohol." The BBC quoted sources saying Cissé's refusal to wear the sponsored shirt had left him in a "strained" relationship with the Premier League side (AFP, 7/18). MARKETING MAGAZINE's Loulla-Mae Eleftheriou-Smith reported Cissé "offered to wear a non-branded Newcastle shirt or a charity branded shirt in order to play" (MARKETING MAGAZINE, 7/17).


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Would you like to work from home for a few big name companies? Are you comfortable working phone jobs from the comfort of your home? Do you prefer a variety of phone jobs, including insurance, sales and customer service? Then ContractWorld might be something for you to further explore. What Exactly is ContractWorld? ContractWorld is a company that you can sign up at to be able to work for other companies which sometimes only hire through ContractWorld. Some of these big name companies include KFC, Pizza Hut, and L'Oreal. These are all virtual … [Read more...]
A Second Look at Thumbtack
One of my post popular posts was a review of the networking site, Thumbtack, which published on September 10, 2012. The post received over 60 comments, and still continues to receive them to this day. At the time, opinions varied on whether Thumbtack was a legitimate service or not. Personally, I have never doubted that Thumbtack is a legitimate site and service. I chose to close my account, because the site was not as user friendly as I thought it could be, and the leads were expensive. Sometimes the leads were as much as $8 each, which was non-refundable, … [Read more...]
Become an Image Reviewer at Shutterstock
Do you enjoy photography as a hobby? Do you know a winning photo when you spot it? Do you want something flexible that doesn't require making phone calls? Then let's introduce you to Shutterstock and the work-at-home (WAH) Image Review position. What is Shutterstock? Shutterstock is an online community of photographers, videographers, artists, and illustrators that sell their work royalty-free to businesses and consumers. The site is basically set up as an e-commerce site where buyers and sellers can connect. They even have their own … [Read more...]
Review of Measurement Inc.
Do you have a bachelor's degree in something? Do you enjoy working seasonally? Do have an interest in grading and scoring? Then Measurement Incorporated might be a good seasonal work-at-home (WAH) job for you. What Exactly is Measurement Incorporated? At Measurement Incorporated or MI, Reader/Evaluators are trained to score essays, open-ended test items, and performance assessments based on scoring criteria that differ by project. It is temporary, project-by-project work, and the busiest times are from January to June with the slowest times being from … [Read more...]
Review of Enroll and Tutoring Online
Do you have a love for both teaching and learning? Are you a parent who wants to instill the importance of learning into your kids? Would you yourself like to become a lifelong learner? Well, then Enroll.com might have something for you. What Exactly is Enroll? Founded in June 2012 as part of a community outreach program for underprivileged youth, Enroll now utilizes technology to reach across those same boundaries and help all students, everywhere. Enroll's goal—according to its website—is "to create the most unique and powerful collaborative … [Read more...]
Cash for Surveys from Paid ViewPoint
Do you enjoy earning extra money from taking surveys? Do you believe that surveys should pay cash and not prizes and points? Do you like "short and sweet" surveys that don't go on forever? Then Paid ViewPoint might be something for you to look into. What Exactly is Paid ViewPoint? Paid ViewPoint is a marketing research survey site, where interested individuals go to create an account to take surveys. Paid ViewPoint is powered by Ask Your Target Market, a survey and marketing platform, which caters to entrepreneurs needing to find … [Read more...]
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By Eric Pop
Stanford University
Online Presentations
02 Mar 2009
Electrons and Phonons
Researchers should cite this work as follows:
Eric Pop (2009), "Illinois ECE 598EP Lecture 3.3 - Hot Chips: Electrons and Phonons," http://nanohub.org/resources/6407.
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Are we having fun yet?
Released Albums
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Suffolk, England (Henham Park Estate)
Jul 16 - Jul 19 2015
Updated 23 hours ago
One More Week to Bestival!
by CoS Staff
on August 29, 2014, 4:45pm
Album Review: La Roux – Trouble in Paradise
Jackson's electropop engages us like an old friend.
on July 21, 2014, 12:00am
La Roux announces 2014 tour
In support of her new album, Trouble in Paradise.
on July 15, 2014, 1:10pm
Stream: La Roux's new album Trouble in Paradise
UK synth-popper returns with her '70s-inspired sophomore LP.
by CoS Staff
on July 15, 2014, 12:44am
Governors Ball 2014: Top 10 Sets + Photos
Classic case of "Ben says, Dave says" sort of thing.
on June 09, 2014, 9:15pm
Listen: La Roux's new song "Tropical Chancer"
A calypso-flavored taste of the Trouble in Paradise LP.
by Chris Coplan
on June 09, 2014, 2:45pm
The 25 Most Anticipated Albums of Summer 2014
Must-hear records sure to soundtrack your BBQs.
on May 30, 2014, 12:00pm
Listen: La Roux's new single "Uptight Downtown"
Another dance-worthy cut off her upcoming album, Trouble in Paradise.
on May 27, 2014, 2:43pm
Governors Ball reveals 2014 schedule
OutKast or Damon Albarn? TV on the Radio or Grimes? Get ready to make a lot of touch decisions.
by Alex Young
on May 21, 2014, 12:21pm
Top 10 Songs of the Week (5/16)
Revival is only a listen away.
on May 16, 2014, 3:07pm
La Roux announces new album, Trouble in Paradise, stream "Let Me Down Gently"
Elly Jackson returns with her sophomore album on July 7th.
by Ben Kaye
on May 12, 2014, 3:06pm
La Roux announce 2014 North American tour dates
"Bulletproof" synth-pop duo finally return to the road.
on April 04, 2014, 2:50pm


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Broadband grant funds available for those in the local area
Published 09/15/2010, West Central Tribune
WILLMAR — Local organizations have a chance to apply for grants to help them increase both access to broadband and the use of broadband technology.
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Agave nectar
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Anyone know where I can purchase agave nectar or agave syrup for home made margaritas? I'm hoping to find it for a good price.
Rainbow, Whole Foods or any health food store.
I have no idea what you mean by "good price" - I've never noticed a substantial price difference at any of the outlets where I've bought agave nectar. Agave nectar is expensive in comparison to other sweeteners but it has huge health benefits above other sweeteners.
Frankly, its been pricey even when I've bought it in Mexico.0 -
Raley's and I assume, Nob Hill, sells it in the organic section of the market. Didn't notice price though.
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I saw several different brands at the Alameda Natural Grocery. I don't remember ever seeing it at Trader Joe's though. What section was it in?


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Welcome to the world of gluten-free living. Whether you are new to the diet or have been following it for quite some time, I hope these tips and tidbits will be useful to you or someone you know. My family has been gluten-free for 25 years , with everyone being diagnosed at different stages of their lives.
Fish and Chips
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We're Heinen's Grocery Stores, a Cleveland, OH based family-owned grocery store established in 1929. Focused on quality meats, fresh market produce and superior customer service, we make grocery shopping something to smile about.
For more information call us toll free at 1-855-475-2300. | © 2015 All rights reserved. Heinen's, Inc.


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Strawberries In Raspberry Puree
Raspberries | 2 Cup (32 tbs) | |
Sugar | 2 Tablespoon | |
Almond extract | 1⁄4 Teaspoon | |
Strawberries | 1 Pint (hulled) |
In a food processor fitted with the steel blade, puree the raspberries, sugar and almond extract.
Pour into a sieve set over a bowl; with the back of a spoon or rubber spatula, press the puree through the sieve to remove the seeds.
Put the strawberries into 4 long-stemmed goblets or a serving dish.
Pour the puree over the strawberries.
Chill in the refrigerator for 15 minutes.


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Document Type: | Book |
All Authors / Contributors: |
Lynn Schofield Clark |
OCLC Number: | 778636772 |
Description: | xx, 299 pages ; 25 cm |
Contents: | Preface: The parent app and the parent trap -- Part I: Digital and mobile media : cautionary tales : -- 1. Risk, media, and parenting in a digital age -- 2. Cyberbullying girls, helicopter moms, and internet predators -- 3. Strict parents, gamer high school dropouts, and shunned overachievers -- Part II: Digital media and youth : -- 4. Identity 2.0 : young people and digital and mobile media -- 5. Less advantaged teens, ethnicity, and digital and mobile media : respect, restriction, and reversal -- Part III: Digital and mobile media and family communication : -- 6. Communication in families : expressive empowerment and respectful connectedness -- 7. How parents are mediating the media in middle-class and in less advantaged homes -- 8. Media rich and time poor : the emotion work of parenting in a digital age -- 9. Parenting in a digital age : the mediatization of family life and the need to act -- Appendix A: Methodology -- Appendix B: Parents, children, and the media landscape : resources -- Appendix C: Family digital and mobile media agreement. |
Responsibility: | Lynn Schofield Clark. |
More information: |
The Parent App is more than an advice manual. As Clark admits, technology changes too rapidly for that. Rather, she puts parenting in context, exploring the meaning of media challenges and the consequences of our responses--for our lives as family members and as members of society.
Publisher Synopsis
The Parent App is an engaging read for both academics and parents. There is no contradiction in straddling these two worlds for Clark, who acknowledges that her own parenting conundrumssuch as the age at which her children should first own a mobile phonehave very much shaped her scholarly work. Alette Schoon, Mobile Media and Communication Read more...
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An Official Statement made by Mr Yoshitami Kameoka, Parliamentary Secretary, Cabinet Office, Japan, at the fourth session of the Global Platform for Disaster Risk Reduction, May 2013.
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Weekly, 45-minute classes include songs, chants, movement, and instrument play. These activities are presented as informal, non-performance-oriented musical experiences — developmentally appropriate for children and easy for parents and caregivers — regardless of their own musical ability. Semester length varies from 9-11 weeks during the year and 6 weeks during the summer.
We offer Big Kids™ ages 5-7, mixed-ages class for children ages 0-5 and babies classes ages 8 months and under at time of registration. Babies 8 months and under are able to attend a mixed-aged class alone or with an older sibling and the Babies class in a one semester enrollment then the family moves up to mixed-age classes.
Join us for our one-time "Seasonal Songs" classes for the whole family to enjoy! All ages welcome for one $15.00 fee. SIBLINGS FREE! Get into the spirit of the holidays with classics you are sure to know! FREE GIFT FOR EACH CHILD GIVEN AT THE END OF OUR JINGLE AND JAM!
Join us for the Bells Song Collection this Winter!
This semester, you'll learn twenty-five songs and activities, including a rousing new rendition of the American folksong, "Alabama Gal"-great for dancing with a partner even when you're not at a hoe-down! Our version of this traditional tune features banjo, harmonica, and cajon (a Peruvian box drum). The Bells collection also includes Music Togethers favorites like "Me, You, We," which is often one of the first songs little ones learn to sing. "Trot Old Joe," and "The Bells of Westminster." In addition to your weekly classes your tuition includes materials for you to use at home, access to the online Family Music Zone and a family newsletter full of resources and music-making ideas!
We hope you'll join us for some music fun as the JOY you express during music making TODAY becomes your child's JOY in music throughout life!
Below is our schedule of upcoming classes. To register, please click on the registration link at the top of this page. If you do not see a class that fits your scheduling needs, please use the Contact Us link at the top of the page to tell us your schedule. If there is enough interest, we may be able to open a class at a different day and/or time.
Click the correct tab below for semester you are interested in for the class listings.
Each participating family receives:
FALL, WINTER and SPRING Sessions
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Music Together art & logo design © 1992-2015 Music Together LLC. Music Together is a registered trademark. Pikes Peak Music Together, LLC is licensed by Music Together LLC. For more locations: www.musictogether.com - (800) 728-2692


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The Best Nail Treatments
11 Solutions to Your Top Manicure Problems
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11 Solutions to Your Top Manicure Problems
Every time there's a new polish launch, we get all giddy inside, but ridges, splitting nails, and unsightly cuticles can sabotage a manicure. Whatever your hand and nail issues may be, there are plenty of treatments catered to curing your specific ailments. With a little diligence you can get your hands back into tip top shape and ready for showing off everything from classic polish shades to awe-inspiring nail art.
— Additional reporting by Kaitlyn Dreyling
Source: Getty
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1 year
@Jessica Cruel. Thank you for replying to me. I am going to buy some as soon as I go shopping (or I might just order it online). I love doing my nails, but I don't like it when they are not "PERFECT". I always give myself manicures. It is so relaxing to me.
I will let you know how it works if I do decide to do it.
thank you so very much for the fast reply.
1 year
@dford2 It depends on how big the dip on your nail is. I think you could layer a few coats of the ridge filler to make it less noticeable. Let us know your results if you decide to try it!
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I have a question about this product.. the Deborah Lippmann Ridge Filler Base. I recently had an infection at the nail bed and now I have a big dip in my nail now (it had grown out to mid nail) would this ridge filler base work to hide this horrible looking dip in my nail?
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- My Blessed Life™ - http://myblessedlife.net -
{meet myra}
Posted By Myra Hope On October 30, 2009 @ 10:13 am In | Comments Disabled
Hey y'all!
This is me – Myra.
I love God, my amazing childhood-sweetheart husband and two precious sons.
I grew up on a small, family farm in the North Alabama foothills of the Appalachian mountains. We lived smack dab in between my Memaw and Granddaddy and my aunt, uncle & two cousins. My husband and I now live in Memaw and Granddaddy's house. We are loving the house up-to-date. We are so grateful to live in the country. It's a wonderful place to raise our boys.
I'm the oldest of five children who have the most incredible parents in the world. My dad pastors a tiny church of which I've been the pianist since I was six. Yes, six. We sang what I could play. Let's just say it was a very limited repertoire. Ha! My precious mom has devoted her life to teaching my siblings and me academics, how to live, how to serve and how to get along with each other. We are an incredibly tight-knit bunch.
My childhood memories are full of adventures including throwing freshly-dug bushels of potatoes to the pig with one of my cousins, hoe-ing strawberries in my Granddaddy's amazing garden and drinking "orange coke" from his old blue thermos on hot Summer days.
I grew up surrounded by creative people. My mom is an excellent seamstress who taught me how to sew. She patiently let me rearrange the living room and the bedroom I shared with my sister. She welcomed us to play dress-up in her old formal gowns and have tea parties with her fine china. My Memaw gave me an unquenchable love for spray paint as she painted her outdoor furniture every single Spring. And my Granny showed me how to plant a lovely flower bed.
I first laid eyes on my "someday husband" when I was nine years old. I knew that moment that I would someday marry him. We're twenty-one years into our friendship and seven years into our marriage and we are both thankful and happy. That man keeps me in stitches all the time. Life is always an adventure. Never boring. Needless to say, our love story is…unique [1].
I followed my passion to make things beautiful by getting a bachelor's degree in interior design. After college, I worked as a designer and salesperson at a local high-end furniture retailer. It was a fabulous job that I thoroughly enjoyed. I "retired" when I was seven months pregnant with Ridley.
Motherhood is the hardest thing I've ever done, but the rewards are immeasurable. I'm momma to an angel baby [2], and two little men who are complete joys to my heart. Ridley's birth [3] was extremely difficult and I lived in a fog {with pain} for years after that. Cameron's birth [4] was redemptive in every way – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I'm finally finding my motherhood mo-jo [5]. It's taken a long time.
I love all things diy, decorating my home, crafting, organizing and decorating for events, thrift shopping, remodeling, spray painting and upcycling. I'm also one of those crazy people who decorates for holidays [6] with with creative, festive decor.
Cooking and baking delicious food [7] for my family brings me incredible joy.
I'm on a journey to take better care of myself and my family, so I love talking about living naturally [8], losing that pesky weight [9], using essential oils [10] and rocking natural childbirth [11].
I am far from perfect. I'm a work in progress and I don't have it all figured out. I don't love cleaning my house, working out, folding socks or watering the flowers, but I do it anyway and I'm always so happy when it's done!
I'm so excited that you found me in this crazy big blogosphere! I can't wait to get to know you better as we journey along together in this wonderful thing called life!
I would love to work with you by promoting your brand, so check out my advertising page [12]!
I look forward to connecting with you [13] via Google [14], Facebook [15], Twitter [16], Pinterest [17] and Instagram [18]!
Article printed from My Blessed Life™: http://myblessedlife.net
URL to article: http://myblessedlife.net/meet-myra
URLs in this post:
[1] our love story is…unique: http://myblessedlife.net/meet-myra/love-story
[2] an angel baby: http://myblessedlife.net/2009/07/remembering-my-angel-baby.html
[3] Ridley's birth: http://myblessedlife.net/2010/06/my-body-my-baby-my-way.html
[4] Cameron's birth: http://myblessedlife.net/2012/07/camerons-birth-story.html
[5] finding my motherhood mo-jo: http://myblessedlife.net/2013/06/finding-my-motherhood-mojo.html
[6] decorates for holidays: http://myblessedlife.net/category/holiday-decor
[7] Cooking and baking delicious food: http://myblessedlife.net/2013/02/for-the-joy-of-cooking.html
[8] living naturally: http://myblessedlife.net/category/natural-living
[9] losing that pesky weight: http://myblessedlife.net/category/weight-loss
[10] using essential oils: http://myblessedlife.net/category/essential-oils
[11] rocking natural childbirth: http://myblessedlife.net/category/pregnancy-and-birth
[12] my advertising page: http://myblessedlife.net/advertise
[13] connecting with you: http://myblessedlife.net/contact
[14] Google: https://plus.google.com/104725385564446647755?rel=author
[15] Facebook: http://facebook.com/myblessedlife.net
[16] Twitter: http://twitter.com/blessedlife2
[17] Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/myblessedlife/boards
[18] Instagram: http://instagram.com/my_blessed_life
Click here to print.
Copyright © 2011 my blessed life™. All rights reserved.


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Funeral Etiquette
Guest Book
"Dear Jean, I am so sorry for your loss. Please accept my condolences to you and your family during this difficult time." Debbie Blanchard (Raymond, NH)
"Jean and Family- I am so sorry to hear of Bob's death. I haven't seen your family in a long, long time but I vividly remember Bob as an exceptionally..."
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We offer many opportunities to connect with people like you. Search by zip code to find a support group or ongoing discussion near you, or connect with others online. Find a Group Find a Group
Does Coffee Protect Against MS? This and Other Wellness/Lifestyle Research Questions Highlighted at Upcoming AAN Meeting February 26, 2015
Canbex and Ipsen Announce Funding to Start Phase II Trial of Oral VSN16R for MS Spasticity, Moving Preclinical Work Funded by National MS Society to Clinical Trials February 24, 2015
Researchers Funded by National MS Society Report Early Success Testing a Novel Strategy for Protecting the Nervous System in Mice with MS-like Disease February 24, 2015
The Chapter office location will be closed Thursday February 26th. You may still reach staff members during operating hours through individual email listed here or through email@example.com


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Article Preview
Norway broadcast: 1 confirmed dead in Oslo government headquarters blast
Published 07/22/2011, Associated Press
Norway's public broadcaster NRK says one person has been confirmed killed in the explosion at the government headquarters in Oslo.
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Tag Archives: code
Creating Content With Shortcodes
WordPress shortcodes are simple but powerful tools in your WordPress toolbox yet they get very little attention. Shortcodes were added in WordPress 2.5 as an easy way to create macros for use in your content. WordPress.com has a wide array … Continue reading


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Razor Hill is a broadloom carpet from Bentley Prince Street with a texture similar to tweed, featuring colorful space-dyed yarn—inspired by food trucks in Los Angeles—with a background of neutrals. Woven from leftover yarn from previous product runs of the company's Easy Street Collection, the carpet has a minimum of 15% recycled yarn and 18% when installed with High PerformancePC backing. Razor Hill is suitable for higher education, medical, and open-office applications. It is part of a collection that includes five other complementary carpets options. bentleyprincestreet.com
Jennifer Brite
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Starwood call center takes its first call
The Starwood Hotels contact center, located at the former Wichita Mall at 4301 E. Harry, took its first call Monday morning, but will continue to take applications in preparation for additional hires.
The center has opened in temporary space with 57 employees, with help from trainers from other company contact centers, and with another 60 people in training. The company expects to employ up to 200 by the end of the year, and it might be ramping up for more hiring in 2014.
State officials said in May that Starwood has agreed to hire more than 900 employees for the center, although Starwood Vice President Mike English, who oversees the company's call centers around the world, on Monday didn't confirm a number.
Company officials said Monday that they have received about 1,500 job applications. Those who weren't hired in the first few rounds might still be hired, they said. They also welcome more applicants.
"We've been thrilled with the people we've hired so far," said Jessica White, vice president of North America Customer Contact Centers for Starwood Hotels.
White and English on Monday showed off plans for the much larger space at the mall's east end that is being converted into a contact center with nearly 500 seats. The space will be ready by January.
The pay starts at $10.50 per hour, not including performance bonuses.
Starwood Hotels owns Sheraton, Four Points, Westin and a number of other hotel brands around the world.
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text: I love Ahmad brand, it brings a good memories from my childhood back in Russia. I've purchased several flavors: earl grey, passion fruit/mango, raspberry, Blackcurrant Burst - MY FAVORITE and Apricot Sunrise. It's a black tea with fruit notes. I gifted 3 out of 7 items to my mom, mother in law and to her mother, and they were pleasantly surprised cuz it's not very easy to find Ahmad brand in the stores. Thank you BirchBox for having this brand. I'm gonna keep coming back, as long as you have it. YAY!


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Local News
With temperatures in the teens at dawn Tuesday, a cold and hungry gull circled around Old Mill Landing, hoping to find its breakfast.
Deadline is March 3
Will record deeds and index documents, among other duties
Estimated to cost $15,000 to $20,000
Meeting begins at 1 p.m.
Will serve as wetlands coordinator
Northern Neck Audubon Society will visit
It is a special election to fill Virginia's 6th District Senate seat, which lieutenant governor-elect Ralph Northam will be vacating after the first of the year.
The money will be used for a couple of different purposes.
Participants will meet between 7 and 7:30 a.m. at Parks and Rec
Second phase will narrow contestants to 15 in January
People can vote once a day; contest closes Dec. 3