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These Bird Funny poems are examples of Bird poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Bird Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
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Chicken Cot UFO It crossed the gloaming skies above the roofs, in awe we followed then, its jazzy course; mysterious would be the incensed spoofs this ireful ship, upon us, would enforce. Hmm.. ..We said! Abominable was the ship that traced its gaudy eights in air with hum; predestined to avenge our ego trip, atrocious poulets, would not succumb. The chicken soldiers were a frightful troop in pink-pistachio uniforms with spots, that insolent, bombarded us with moop, to hit our heads that were devoid of thoughts. In order to placate the chicken troop, some started to recite their verse to skies; confronting that attacking chicken group, - bird poems they opposed to battle cries. The angry war-birds listened to the verse, that was composed by stunned, exposed confreres, their cackle was bemocking and adverse, - upon their heads they wore rouge voluperes. This myth reflected what would happen if extraterrestrial cots invaded Earth, relentless chicken-birds in martial tiff would moop upon some artists of top worth. © 12/11/2013, G. Venetopoulos moop = Matter Out Of Place
The birds! The birds! Uncountable the subject pronoun words give tongue to humbleness, henceforth to speak; contributing to poetry for birds, our inspiration nested on their beak! He's watching leaping sparrows eating bread, while on his terrace sips green Ceylon chai; it seems to him that poetry has fled, and gone with the banditos, bidding "byee". Alas! The birds have taught us all we know, encyclopedic, scientific, art... Cause he would not be 'mong ya apropos, if poetry was meant to be more smart: { Thy Tristan I shall be, divine Izolde; thus, like a bird of valor, debonair, I'll fly to thee, because I have been told, that someday I'll become a billionaire. Among the birds, oh maid, I picture thee abducted by banditos (or eloped?) thus I, compose my poetry to be reminder of the corns that have not popped. And thus, envisioning, thy magic curves, I'll be a triumphant filibustier, my self-igniting foolish verse, and oeuvres, will reach (oh, dolly bird) thy round derriere. And then, if not for other, thus, demand, my manuscripts will serve a strident cause, vociferous upon the meadowland, by the banditos will receive applause. } © 02-18-2014, G. Venetopoulos (Iambic Pentameter) G.V.
(sing to tune of Hush Little Baby) Hush, little PD, don't say a word. Nathan's gonna buy you a mocking bird. If that bird makes fun of you.... that's what that bird is supposed to do! Take that bird and trade it in. Buy yourself a coat made of leopard skin. Take great care to not go out anywhere that PETA might be about. You could get hit in the head. PETA activists can sure see red. If a new coat you don't need, how about a new cat, Persian breed? If that cat sheds too much hair, have Nathan take you out to a fair. Fairs are fun. You can't go wrong. Are you fast asleep yet from this dumb song? If you're not, I have to say.... your insomnia is here to STAY. Written by Andrea on Oct. 22, 2012 For Send me to sleep....... Poetry Contest Happy ZZZZZZZZs to you, PD
-honestly...I have no clue why...- As I began to rest in my fickle dream Suddenly I was stirred from my sleep I was greeted by many a whisker And petulant snores from my sister The cat mewed ferociously and purred For there on the other side of the window—was a bird! It chirped like a wobbly siren—the ass! And I swear by my bosom it was pecking the glass Suddenly, I sprang up in alarm I swear my bosom was gone! The cat then motioned at the feathered brat For her bright breasts seemed extra fat Of course it wouldn't have been that But I couldn't just blame the cat! I opened the window only a crack And asked very kindly, "May I have my breasts back?" Such pride she attained from my bosom Yet why? –how would she use 'em!? The mockingbird merely turned a goodbye But the stolen twins were too heavy to fly! She plopped to the ground and squawked I would have laughed, but I was shocked! The cat scratched at the window and with her eyes Said, "Prithee, take your breasts—she's mine!" Before I could think I had fallen to the ground To a booming, most terrible sound! My eyes then opened to a cat on my head As the booming sound continued from my sister's bed
They organized a church bazaar, To raise money for the poor. A booth for selling chances Was set up, outside the door. When I bought the raffle ticket, My reasoning was murky, And I could only just believe it, When I won that doggone turkey. Now, the kids were all excited When we brought the critter home. So we placed him in the barnyard, Where he'd have lots of room to roam. Since the date was late October, I'm quite sure you understand, That to have him for Thanksgiving Was my awe inspiring plan. Well, the turkey was no birdbrain, As I was very soon to find. That bird knew what I was thinking; Why, I declare, he read my mind. I let the children care for him, To my most profound regret-- He turned on his charming manner, And, quickly, he became their pet. But that fact did not deter me, I told myself it didn't matter. I was dead set and determined To see that gobbler on a platter. When the kids perceived my purpose, They turned on the tears and pleas. Then, the wife joined in their chorus, And that brought me to my knees. So I told my grieving family They could dry up, and relax. I concealed my disappointment-- Went and put away the axe. Came the dinner of Thanksgiving, Not a sad face could be found. And our live Thanksgiving turkey Was the gladdest bird around. We gathered around the table, And I humbly asked the blessing-- While Tom gobbled down his corn, outside, We had hotdogs and dressing.
I don't know what I'm complaining about, it's not like I've been cuffed, All I have to do is show up for dinner. After all it's the bird that got stuffed. It's not like they're asking a lot from me they won't work me till I've croaked, All I have to do is show up and eat. After all it's the bird that got smoked. I can't tell you that they'll torture me and it seems to be reasonably priced, All I have to do is visit for a while. After all it's the bird that got sliced. I could tell them things to make them laugh until their gravy becomes splattered, All I'd have to do is tell a joke to them. After all it's the bird that got plattered. I think that it smells good enough that I'll eat until they claim my leg's been hollowed, All I have to do is not complain about things. After all it's the bird that got swallowed. I've never given it much thought before but a bird's life is really kind of murky I guess I'd rather be the Thanksgiving guest today than be the Thanksgiving Turkey.
I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth. I let him loose so that he could fly South. But he came home again. This proves that I can't win. He says the F word two hundred times a day. He offends everybody and drives them away. Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them. I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him. I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner. If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner. (This is a fictional poem)
Chicken Cot UFO - Hmm It crossed the gloaming skies above the roofs, in awe our eyes pursued its jazzy course; ( mysterious would be the incensed spoofs this ireful ship, upon us, would enforce! ) Hmm.. ..We said! Abominable was the ship that traced its gaudy eights in air with hum; predestined to avenge our ego trip, atrocious poulets, would not succumb. The chicken soldiers were a frightful troop in pink-pistachio uniforms with spots, that insolent, bombarded us with moop, to hit our heads that were devoid of thoughts. - The Alien ship was rounded like the moon; each angry bird was using a stun-gun, the star of origin of that platoon and planet were most certainly to shun. - In order to placate the chicken troop, some started to recite their verse to skies; confronting that attacking chicken group, - bird poems they opposed to battle cries. The angry war-birds listened to the verse, that was composed by stunned, exposed confreres, their cackle was bemocking and adverse, - upon their heads they wore rouge voluperes. This myth reflected what would happen if extraterrestrial cots invaded Earth, relentless chicken-birds in martial tiff would moop upon some artists of top worth. © G. Venetopoulos, 12/11/2013, All rights reserved moop = Matter Out Of Place Sponsor: Shadow Hamilton Contest Name: Spaceship Deadline: 3/27/2014
Coo-Coo Ca-Ca Chu! That means a bird's crapped on you! That's not nice at all!
His chicken vanished from the face of Earth unhappy and distressed connected so with sites of poetry where lost pets' dearth transformed to versicle expression's flow. Logorrhea of namby pamby lines and balderdash of verbose gardyloo bombarded him with rounds of porcupines stampeded unctuous like rabid gnoo. But on the other hand he met some birds composers of refined and sightly verse, with glinting souls and clever words, their intellect's expressions wise and terse. And when he searched of who to value most received his chicken's metrical riposte. © G.V. 09-14-2013 All rights reserved
Big-eyed hoot owl perched in a tree, hunting for prey while eyeing me. He swooped down swiftly and caught a mouse, flew up and landed on the eave of my house. Old hooty owl quickly ate the vile little beast, burped once loudly, then glided off slowly due east. Wise Mr. Owl will return late tomorrow evening, perch up high in the same darn tree and give me a warning by turning his swiveling head 180 degrees all of the way backwards, giving me a wild-eyed wink and dropping on my sidewalk a couple of turds.
As children are They all want a pet I wanted a horse My little sister wanted a pony Our parents compromised They got us a goldfish Of course we had to name our new pet We compromised yet again and called him Turtle Now turtle would spend hours and hours Running and jumping around an around in his watery fields A very fast Turtle he was We decided to film our little turtle and so we did The show off would make jokes and acrobats Turns out he was a real comedian (also an expert at cards, especially Go Fish) To out surprise, an evil man didn't like our wee turtle Why he called him a darn little monkey He said he would shatter our fish bowl Well he called it a Monkey bowel Then one day we saw something miraculous A second gold fish Turns out he was a she Happily now my sister and I both had pets She a wee little pony and me A great big beautiful black stallion She name her Pony Grasshopper So worried she was, that the evil man from far away Would do great harm to us, Grasshopper and Turtle She said we should get on our pony and horse And ride away on the ocean, far away and safe Then all of a sudden, our neighbors Korean Siamese cat jumped Right through the window, and right smack into the fish bowl Poor Turtle and Grasshopper, all over the floor My sister cried her little heart out that day From that moment forward, I just could never get myself To drink Orange crush again
Hey there Owl sitting up in that tree, What are you doing looking down at me? So with a quick little wink and a short little sigh, that old Owl just replied, Who? Well I don't see any mice or rabbits or bears , no Eagles or Hawks or Robins, any where. No Deer or Elk or even a Moose, So then; yes Mr. Owl I was speaking to you. That old owl just turned his head, looked the other way and calmly said; Who? So with a bit of disgust I started again, naming off animals, and even some kin, I don't see an Elephant or a Zebra or even a laughing Hyena, I don't see my brother or sister or even Aunt Myrtle, Why I don't even see a slow crawling Turtle. That old Owl turned his head about and looked straight at me, and with a bit of chagrin in his eye which I could see, said; Who? I could see I was getting no where fast, and this questioning I was doing was not going to last. So I decided I would end it and just walk away. I was wasting my time trying to get him to say; anything but, Who? So I turned and started to walk away, when I heard these words, in a wise old way. "I am the wisest of all the birds, because I listen to all I've heard. I don't interrupt and I wait my turn, these things are what make me the wisest bird." I turned back to him and with a wink and grin, I simply said; Who?
My mynah bird can't spell a word But he can surely speak it. He squawks all day in mindless rants And really makes a racket. Whenever our TV is on He'll cock his head and listen, Then he recites commercials for Dish soap and cures for bald men. My mynah bird can mimic me. He never shuts his fat beak. And when he copies my poor mom, She turns into a real freak! "Do something with that awful bird!" I often hear her holler, "I'll ship him off to Timbuktu, You bet your bottom dollar!" So yesterday I moved his cage Next to the open window Where he could chatter with a squirrel Or babble with a black crow. I played outside with my friend Nate. We climbed up in our old tree Where Nate told me what he just heard From his big brother Andy. It was the 'latest slang' he said. I thought it sounded real cool- And so did my rat mynah bird Who played me for a big fool. At dinner time when all our mouths Were filled with mom's spaghetti, My mynah bird just blurted out What he heard my friend tell me. Then mom dragged me straight down the hall- I felt like such a dumb dope When she presented my dessert- A plate of sudsy bar soap! I choked and gagged on my own words. Oh, I'd make that mynah tweet! Getting even with blabber mouths Made that bitter soap taste sweet! This morning I phoned my friend Nate- We knew we'd get revenge soon. That bird must learn to bite his tongue Or he'd sing a different tune. I grabbed his cage and toted him On the back of my old bike, And met Nate at the only place Mynah birds don't ever like We went inside and stood in line. Then my nasty mynah sang. He belted out commercial tunes Interjected with 'cool slang.' Shocked mothers hugged their precious kids To shield their tender, young ears. Old ladies gasped, "Well I never- In all my live long years!" The clerk leaned over, stared, then barked, "Now, what can I do for yooooou?" "How much to ship this mynah bird From my house to Timbuktu?"
You all must read Sara Kendrick's poem the "Chicken" before reading this one!!!! Thanks Sara for giving me such a great idea!!!!! Broadways.... "Chicken Play" The stage was dimly lit For the opening of this play The crowd was clucking in anticipation They had no idea A love story A drama A play of philosophy The writer used a feather quill Was this not a hint? The main actress, was a real bird she was She strutted and strolled The audience was captivated Her allure was on display Her beauty hid she was heartless hen Out jumped the Kernel Saunders!!!! Sword in one hand 13 secret spices in the other Well, this birds suitors ran to her defense To no avail at all These buccaneers would end up in a bucket I do not lie It included the fries Sadly parts where tosses to and fro Necks and wings and breasts were sliced It sure was not a pretty sight A civil war this was not The dame was slaughtered on a southern shore Let this me a lesson to you all you gizards While the chickens are away It's for sure This silly poet will play!!
Fatty Jack Is a maniac. He ate a turd From a sick bird. That's a sad fact.
What does the swan say? "I am very elegant as far as fowls go."
What does the duck say? "You quack me up with your jokes. You are quite funny."
Long miles of tedious journey, Missing my darling honey. Travelling impatiently, spend thousands of money, Hope god will bless me with ma lucky soul at this season. Equatorial island exploring its amazed beauty, glittering with immersed grasses. Wrapped by queens necklaced small lake aside, at the outskirts of dalhousie. My heart dwelled into its god gifted creativity, When the night lime lighted, Millions of stars scattered around charming moon. As if its was a wondering boon. Lucky enough for landing with my next hop. Eagerly waiting for my heart chaser, Girl passed near by, few seconds later. Flaming beauty mould my soul. Topped with innocence, ready for my auspicious goal. Her chic appearance, Her innocent appeal. Strucking heart raised with high beats.. Awaited for our romantic date in ma upcoming meet. Frequency of our nature matched. Stolen Eyes of each other were catched. Strings of our heart whistled synchronously. Everything had happened miraclelously. I rebelled the three precious words of romantic dictionary. Accepting my red rose, She blushed. At event of recreation, campfire were ignited. Nobody around us, private moments between we two spotlighted. Playing guitar, she sinked with every beat, That's the coincidence our eyes again meet. Hand in hand danced with the soothing romantic theme, Sparkling smile on her face beamed. Getting closer to her, because of her fragranced cream. Expecting the light around us to be dim. The romantic moment again came, Flaps of my soul opened for the grand dame. She looked too pretty in her gold lame dress, My heart awarded her an order of chivalry. Don't know who are you, but baby you are the one, I am in love. You live in me, You are my love I feel you in my heart, You are my world, I just cant stay apart! Please don't hesitate, please don't lie, Whatever you feel, my heart can buy! Angel of life, Its just you. Completeness in life can't be without you. Wanna Carry journey happily together. Tickling nose, Queenly beauty of my white leather. Hold my senses, its caught by you. Don't let be just memories, wanna feel ecstasy of love towards you forever. Promising to hold your hand throughout life in this lovely weather. Will be your shadow, because your pain will be mine. Its destiny that our heart clicked a snapshot of each other's soul. Stopping by my question, Will you marry me, my Kindred Soul?
Leeroy von Nebulae and Pitter Patter Supernova Upon the sparkling April field, where the bell-flowers blossome'd, two poets stood amid the blooms, two writers of their wisdom, where singing aves exalted them, cause deep in verse have fathome'd and treated poetry like none, with loyalty and serfdom. Meantime the birds were chirping in the leafage of the forest the two composers synthesize'd the crop of thoughts that random became their poetry's free verse, philosophy, thus, modest, the scriptures called bankrupted talk and artlessness of flotsam. The authors, thus, amid the trees, and vervains' purple colors, narrated 'bout the pepper steaks and pizzas pepperoni, the grayish donkeys and their bray, through softened words of candor, conducting hence this spectacle and joyous ceremony. What was occurring round the two was godly sent, on purpose; the softened breeze, the sunny morn, the singing of the birdies, and furthermore their kindest verse that both believed was flawless, - the soul's redemption stands upon the praising by the toadies. Obtusely raising, slow but firm, their tilted thoughts euphoric have driven both to fly above this natural assemblage, hence joyfully enjoine'd the cause of logic anti-strophic, amid the clouds envisioning a pizza-Heaven-cottage. Leeroy von Nebulae and Pitter Patter Supernova expressed their malarky of verse, that donkeys then recited and stood impassive 'mid the blooms, their thoughts a dull cadenza, evaluated by the birds, that chirped their notes, astounded. © 03-23-2014, G. Venetopoulos, All Rights Reserved (Iambic decapentasyllabic verse)
What does the goose say? "No, you can't have my feathers to fill your pillow."
What does the crow say? "When I'm the farmer's greatest enemy, life sucks."
It fell from the sky. I have a knot on my head. Dead pigeon falling.
I have 3 cute cats They love running through my house chasing each other. They have a favorite window which holds all 3 of them quite well so they can see outside. The same time everyday after their play they all settle in together watching for the visitors who come outside their window. The bird feeder is full of seed and the squirrels eat all that falls. Inside they their eyes glued on the visitors who are invading their yard tails swishing back and forth as fast as they can. Than the chattering start.s it is in kitty talk but I am sure they are saying things to the birds and squirrels that they do not want me to know. After awhile they all are bored and frustrated because tonight they won't have bird or squirrel stew.
Could a scythe cut a slice from a sycamore tree? If a bird had no feathers what bird would it be? If a square had three corners would it still be a square? Will your curls always swirl if you tug at your hair? My curls will always swirl For questions make them so You will question me 'why' when my answer is 'no'. If I answer you 'yes' You will question with 'how' If a tree could grow knowledge I'd reach for a bough.
A bird sat in a tree And looked down at me And said rather musically "uh huh" He cocked his head to one side And then the other Peering straight at me I of course replied, "uh huh" Imitating his spontaneous bird talk He hopped back a step, surprised Understanding, then answered back, "uh huh" Delighted with our conversation I replied with a friendly "uh huh" I know our conversation is limited But I'm happy to carry on This inter specie dialogue A connection, a shared moment I'm sure he understands Nodding his head in affirmation Then he rattled on and on, Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
~~Planet Earth And The Oozlum Bird There was a question I was asked - just the other day Is the earth flat? - Well what do you think I'd say? I looked out of the window, and pondered on this thought A flat earth not round... but I came up with nought. A flat earth maybe, but we could fall off the edge Or is it surrounded by a great big privet hedge. How can we tell from our own window frame if the earth is a ball or flat - To work it out is my aim, and thats hard from where I'm sat. The formulae for finding - the horizon of the land we can see The assumption being it's round - or spherical to you and me. Firstly distance from the observers eyes to the horizon we must square, This equals the square of the height of the observers' eyes - I suppose that means the pair. This must be added to two times the radius, multiply by the height of the observer. Now I am getting a bit confused but I carry on with a fervour. The assumption must be according to this equation That the earth is a ball - so on this occasion... I consider the planet a bit like - the legendary Oozlum Bird If we go round in a straight line - now I know this is absurd But as the bird ran round and round chasing its own tail It disappeared up its own ass - have you heard that tale? Round and round we go on this planet ball of ours Chasing our tails sometimes - for hours and for hours The planet is round and I think... not a flat earth Or we would never have the chance to return, and laugh with such mirth As we see everyone chasing their own tails on their own ass We know like the Oozlum Bird if we are not careful...what will come to pass.
Trio of Limericks. Saving money There was an old fellow named Dave He found a dead chook in a cave It smelled just a bit But he had to admit That a whole lot of coin he did save. When Andy got randy There was an old sheep dog named Andy He had such a liking for brandy One day he got drunk And lord how he stunk Cause with an old skunk he got randy. Poor lady Once an old lady named Faye Who ate like a horse every day This day she did choke And it was no joke Her corpse in a heap now does lay.
Busted When Santa got stuck down the chimney What a terrible fright for young lives Imagine the sight that then met them Imagine their awful surprise. With a crash and a thump and a holler A bang and a whoosh and a boom The magical globe trotting Santa Daintily entered their room! He landed full square in their fireplace His hat flopped down over his eyes He looked really much more like Black Beard Except he was double the size. The children sat up in amazement Then hid and peeped through a crack As this unfortunate dirty old Santa Was hit on the head by his sack. The air turned quite blue for a moment When he finally uttered a cry I've hurt every bone in my body Was the gist of what he implied Now Rudolph looked down from above him Shook his head and then let out a sigh Get up you clumsy old has been We still have work left to do tonight. Well Santa looked right up that chimney His plight became clear in a flash He was stuck with his sack at the bottom And didn't know how to get back. The children, still hid in the corner Just couldn't believe what they saw As this dirty old Santa recovered Did his job and then limped out the door. They watched as he climbed out the window His suit now completely akimbo But Rudolph was there with the sleigh and a spare He now had clean clothes to change into. Once more Rudolph rescued the big man Stamped his hoof, got him out of his whirl Threatened to leave less he focus You know, of course, Rudolph's a girl!!!! The children got up in the morning Frustrated, annoyed and distressed, For their bedroom looked just like a bombsite Where two sacks of gifts had been left Despite having left him a message Stating ' please do not leave so much trash, We are modern day children remember What we want is a cheque or some cash'
the shipwrecked sailor from the North lands on land between the seas and sees nothing but trees the trees shade him from the sun in the sky the sky provides a medium in which the birds from the trees can fly and the birds nested in the trees on occasion provide the sailor birds to fry unfortunately the shipwrecked sailor after his bird meal and nap still can't fly
My husband has a new friend , it's not "best man's". It's a winged , feathered cliche that's taken a stand. He lives in a tree or on our porch rail. Don't ask what it's doing when it flicking it's tail . It's lived here for months and won't fly away . I've consider naming him until husband looks my way . It's really quite funny to see my love rant . Swearing , cussing and being ty-rant . Hosing and washing should be a deterrent But believe me when I say that bird is divergent . I think he is mourning the loss of a mate , IT's passing won't be too soon , my husband can't wait . He'd blast him for sure without even a word . But damn it to hell , he's our freakin state bird ! My son keeps repeating it's unconstitutional . My husband just smiles looking quite mad and delusional . Maybe come Spring he'll fly from here . Find another mate , far away , not near . I try to be serious and try not to giggle . But over his shoulder I see that bird wiggle . The swearing and cussing starts over once more . Grabbing his weapons he storms out the door . For now I'll just watch as the battle goes on . Bird against man , armed with a bottle of Dawn .
There was a fine bird named Tallulah who had the most fine alula* she played on her drum rum-a-tum-tum Fine solos* for her sister Beulah. Fair Beulah thought "I'll not be outdone!" "It's my civic* duty to strum" so this one high noon* with her alula she tuned An accompaniment to rum-a-tum-tum! While the gals thought it their civic duty to play music all root-a-toot-tootie they rocked the nest and you know the rest Both gals fell on their plump feathered booties! *Palimdromes used alula [short bird feathers corresponding to a thumb] civic, solos, noon Poet: Debbie Guzzi
Now, if only, they would cut the damn property tax! Maybe, the elderly wouln't have to loose their homes and move to Florida! Maybe, a God fearin minority member could live here and own a piece of it? Hello out there in WASP land.. say hey To the folks in Green witch! Governor Jodi Rell our version of the wicked witch of the east crossed with Mrs. Ward Cleaver is out there pounding the proverbial pavement looking to balance the ole budget AGAIN! Hit the road Jack and don't ya Come Back No Mo, No Mo, No Mo, No…….. say the local daughters of the D.A.R. and the Ladies of the Eastern Star to the rise of minorities in the local school ….. The Good Ole Nutmeg state has quite a mix hell just about anything goes here! Land of the Free home of the Brave, you can even get a state certified Gay marriage Robin Red breast ain't our state bird for nothing one of the first 3 states to protect the early bird getting the worm! Yup Con neck tee cut is a fine place to live and grow trees Y'all come up some time for a visit.. just don't head for the shore cause you can't get to it Snob Zoning and All…. You can find just about anything you need here in the good ole Nutmeg state (did you know you can get high on Nutmeg?) have legal hallucinates will travel so join the local nuts SOUPERS and come for a visit just don't stay too long.
I once heard a knock at my door And there was a crow repeating "No more" I was so taken aback I hit him with a rack And sent him crashing right on the floor! September,3,2014
A cat loved a parakeet, It would always keep looking for her around the neighborhood, Just to catch a glimpse of the cute parakeet, When the parakeet will sit for a little while on the Guava Tree, The cat would leave everything else and unabashedly look at the parakeet, She took no notice of this at first, Then on a beautiful wintery day, she noticed the love-struck cat, Their eyes met, It was Pure Magic! She loved the color of the cat's eyes, It was a deep shade of dark brown, In sharp contrast to the deep blue eyes that she had, The cat's eyes said a lot of things to her, which only she could understand, Their silent love went on for days, They kept looking at each other for hours and hours and hours together, Then months passed till one day the cat mustered some courage, Walking in a trance, it tip-toed towards the Guava Tree, The cute parakeet laughed and giggled a little, Seeing the Romeo take charge, She flew down from a higher branch to a lower one to cutely say 'Bravo', The cat now swelling with great pride climbed atop the the Guava tree with some difficulty, They embraced, hugged each other and had a feeling of Divine Love! Yesterday evening, while it was raining, they finally got married, The squirrel was the best man in their wedding, All the animals and birds of the neighbourhood wished the newly weds their best of wishes, They happily live now in the good old Guava Tree.
Well I could write endlessly about Frankie my cute English bulldog, But when it comes to being a good watchdog, she's closer to a log. I do however have a pet that notifies us if someone is approaching, She has taken it upon herself to do this faithfully without any coaching. Her name is Molly and she is a watch-bird, my fearless cockatiel, She performs this amazing task with confidence and great zeal. Her elegant grey head feathers stand tall signifying she's alert, She perches stoically on the frig, her notification ready to assert. Living in the countryside, a security system is needed, or so I feel, When people come to the house, Molly lets out the loudest squeal. A different chirp for each family member, my daughter gets a loud burst, My son on the other hand gets loud staccato chirps, they're the worst. Molly spends most of her time out of her cage when someone is at home, She surveys the home flying from window to door, monitoring her zone, Taking her job seriously, she bites if you try to stop or get in her way, Molly has a job to do, she's the security alarm, keeping burglars at bay. So for a little bird seed, you too can get a watch bird that makes lots of noise. Keep in mind, there are a few downfalls, there's a lot of things she destroys. Chewing windowsills, hiding jewelry and pooping where ever she may be, A bit of a bitchy bird but what a set of lungs, a unique way to increase security. Written by Lee Ramage August 30, 2011 For Ryan Jackson's Contest "Animals on my mind"
I know a bird who sways and swings He jumps and kicks and flaps his wings He cannot fly in stormy weather He cannot strut his fluffy feathers So instead he sits and sings.
( Limerick) A big bird from Cantoon could not fly With his wings spread open he perch'd high But the branch then just broke Fell and it wasn't a joke Thought that he was dead and start'd to cry! Dorian Petersen Potter Aka ladydp2000 Copyright@2014 10.4.2014
(Limerick} The Circle of witches all heard a loud knock "Come in!" Said a voice behind a big rock But it wasn't "the Raven" And sure wasn't a Haven So all run out just wearin' socks and no frock! Dorian Petersen Potter Aka ladydp2000 Copyright@2014 September 10, 2014
THE RAVEN (NOT FROM POE) A raven chick attempted first flying lesson He didn't quite make his preplanned destination Mother bird stood by evaluating his flying foray Okay is good but good is not okay There's more to this story and it's all true Mother had something more before she was through When her little bird alighted on one of canyons' ledges She flew to him and placed a treat from her beak into the fledger's But there are some who have no use for birds Using birds as models for disparaging words Pointing a finger "bird brain" they will say Not realizing the finger is pointed the wrong way
CHASE THE HEN IN THE KITCHEN! -Dharga Nagar Safa Chase away, The hen, In the kitcHEN!
He sits outside my window The loudest thing I've ever heard He keeps me awake all night long I'm gonna kill that mockingbird He even mimics my wife snoring He's a mockingbird you see My wife's half deaf, she can't hear him Sawing logs up in that tree When daylight comes he's as quiet as a mouse And I just can't find his nest I think that bird thinks he's smarter than me So I'll put him to the test I put on my best camouflage With a flashlight taped to my hat I crawled on my belly, behind my house To see where he was at I stayed outside all night long And that bird didn't utter a sound My back was aching and my butt was sore From sleeping on the cold,cold ground The very next night I went to bed And that bird started singing once more But I think he must have invited some friends 'Cause it was a whole lot louder than before To make a long story short, I out smarted that bird And now he's as quiet as a mouse For now I sleep outside every night In my bed behind the house
I saw a little bird sitting in a tree, I could see him he could see me, He pecked at an apple and sang, And through woods his song rang, Happy he had anther little peck, I smiled as the apple went down his neck, It flapped its wings but did not fly, He watched another bird float by, He turned around and did a dance, So I did the same just by chance, We both waltzed around the tree, I flapped my arms he laughed at me, A man was watching close by He asked if he could join in and try, So two men and a bird wriggled, A woman joined in and she jiggled, Another woman and her pet, She was good the best yet, Then everyone in the park, Strutted their stuff until dark, As each left they gave a wave, It's my first time at a rave.
Samantha once scampered a tree To see whatever she could see. So far up did she boost That an owl came to roost On Sammy's precarious knee.
~Taxidermist~ Dear little blue bird sitting on the mat Please don't poop on it because it isn't tat. That's it, sit on the bird bath there on the rim You look a fine little chap sitting there so trim. I am a taxidermist and I am after a blue tit Why don't you jump on my hand so I can see, and you can have a little sit? My collection lacks a bird; we could perhaps make a date It's a pity you are alone I could do with your little mate You would fill the place nicely it's a pity you are not red But I can soon paint you up as I am a taxidermist- I think I said. no offense to real taxidermists out there I know you do not do this xx Competition Entry: For Catie Lindsey comp: Word Games. © 1/06/2012 ~GG~
The jackdaw is a curious bird He hops and runs along, His genial "tchak, tchak" can be heard – Alas, he has no song. Why look these corvine birds so old ? Jet black and hooded grey, With beady eye and black beak, bold, They chase small birds away. Corvus Monedula is his name, It's from the Latin took, With habits very much the same Some take him for a rook. Poor old Jack, has no collective For meeting with his friends, He shouts "Tchak ! Tchak!" and this invective 'Gainst all mankind he sends. Most creatures have collective nouns, It really is an oddity – No way to name this gang of clowns ? I'll christen them JOCUNDITY !
The cuckoo calls her cheery word To let us know she has returned And everyone is quite pleased too To hear the very first cuckoo This lovely bird it will not rest Lays its eggs in others nests Then flies away and leaves behind A foster parent who is kind The cuckoo as you see my friend Leave their children for others to tend And when the young have grown up to Their instinct tells them what to do So when you next hear cuckoo's call Remember that I told you all This bird means spring is on its way And for some bird its foster day
A Buddhist bird flies Under the eyes Of winter's sun As I watch his flight Across a lonely wintry sky Gazing up At his long, long flight south He diverts himself From the chilly northern wind A wind That the sun cannot warm He diverts himself With a single thought As only a Zen Buddhist bird might do And asks What is the sound Of one wing flapping? ------------------------------------------------------------------- "the sound of one hand clapping"...(by J. D. Salinger) Thank you Leo
I look out my window, And what do I see, I see a blue bird looking at me. Why is it looking at me? Does it find me amusing? Do I look confusing? And before I could say anymore, It flew away, I guess it got bored. To My Poet Friend, David :)
I was corner-stoned by many of you. The note was dotted with a dash. But this note was an ultimate smash. I found a peephole and peeped through. I found a bird gave him the note and away he flew, Across the deserts and the valleys he was there in a flash, Across the rivers and Oceans he made a great big splash. He made it to the shore, but the note he began to chew. He passed a timely test, And his belly was full, He did not stop to rest, The note he had to pull. The bird landed on the Oceans shore, Singing praises of his rugged chore.
You was such a big bird fatten The first to grace our table We almost always had a young hen Sometimes a mean ol' rooster if we were able Looking foward to the golden bird With the crispy, crunchy skin not curd A drumstick or a baby drumette The bird of a stories one who did pruette When in the kitchen ladies did gather They needed to know what was the matter Mother discovered she didn't have pot In which the big bird would sot They took the hack saw to cut that bird Then cooked him in five pots how absurd Somehow got him ready for the table To add to our meal of greens and sweet potatotes
In a field both sere and stark, stood a forlorn Meadowlark. Motionless, he eyed the ground, ears alert for any sound. Unaware, an insect stirred, deep in dust and cockleburs. A grain of sand became dislodged and rolled between the lone bird's claws. The bird allowed himself to blink, his beady eyes as black as ink. The bug crawled out, antenna waving, which only piqued the lone bird's craving. With one swift hop, the bird attacked. The bug, alas, a midday snack. ©Danielle White
Penguin Poet Penguin Poet The Batman was standing to the side of the bumbershooter looking askance at the penguins' aide so intent was the man in the plastic wrapper that he failed to see Robin coming up behind them and lost his nanner in a Robin manner he was soon tied up like a handcuff furrowing into the background noises of the Penguin lair the hair of the penguin was slick jetted black ebon nighttime fright and he launched a bird kick almost getting Batman in the jaw Robin came unglued and he is rally very strong he launched another bird kick in the belly of the thug. WHAM Whack Thwack POW SOCK WHAM the fight was soon over and the Penguin land in jail.


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15-06-1998 Comments (0)
EfavirenzEpivirLamivudineMerck KGaARetrovirSustivaZidovudine
Two investigational drugs from US firms Vertex Pharmaceuticals andDuPont Merck have shown early promise…
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subset: commoncrawl


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Entertain in luxury
Throw the best party ever this month with our selection of festive but elegant black and gold accessories
1. Visionnaire Relax in the uniquely shaped Shannon armchair designed by Alessandro La Spada. The chair is upholstered in quilted, studded nubuck leather. Available at Louvre Gallery, about HK$127,500
2. Wellendorff Dazzle guests at the door in this 18ct yellow gold necklace and amulet, paved in diamonds and set with mother of pearl, about HK$482,000
3. Baccarat The Variations crystal vase, accented by acid colours, gives off a neo-pop vibe. Whether as a centrepiece or part of the décor, the sculptural vase will surely be a conversation starter, HK$31,600
4. Armani Casa Simple yet stylish, the angular Edel armchair adds a sleek touch to your living area, HK$132,000
5. Cartier This octagonal clock, made from sterling silver with palladium finish and sculpted rock crystal and red garnet cabochons, will look grand on any mantle. The intricate clock is limited to 100 pieces, HK$402,000
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Restaurants in Tucson
The artisanal, wood-fired pizzas (which come with toppings like rainbow trout and aged New York steak) strike the perfect balance between family-casual and creative cuisine.
The restaurant serves 90 wines by the glass and is co-owned by a master sommelier.
The soulful cuisine (think crisp duckling served on beluga lentils with house-made loquat marmalade) from James Beard Award winner Janos Wilder is a hit with vacationing lovebirds.
Cure a serious iron deficiency with a thick cut of steak, ostrich, bison, or the tried-and-true liver and onions. Don't pass up the margaritas.
The kitchen churns out authentic Mexican dishes like carne asada tacos, tangy ceviche, and creamy fresh horchata (an addictively sweet rice drink).
Sample a burrito filled with carne seca (air-dried beef) at this original location.
This Pie Town establishment sells butterscotch, dutch apple crumb, New Mexico apple, cherry, peach, blueberry, (and on weekends:) banana cream, coconut cream, and chocolate pies. Though pies are the obvious specialty, try the green-chile stew before ordering a hearty dessert.
Head into the foothills for killer barbecued ribs.
Once you taste it, it's difficult not to obsess over the house-made tres leches cake.
Sit at the counter for a beer and the spicy, lemony Seven Seafood Stew.
On Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, the bar offers a special: mussels and a glass of wine for $11.50.
Suzana Davila, who runs the nouvelle-Mexican Café Poca Cosa, constantly updates her chalkboard menu—look for pollo en pipian or the irresistible tamale pie.


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Pigeons and Doves (Columbidae)
Stock Dove (Columba oenas) - HBW 4, p. 114
French: Pigeon colombin
German: Hohltaube
Spanish: Paloma Zurita
Other common names: Stock Pigeon, Western Stock-dove/Stock-pigeon
Taxonomy: Columba Oenas Linnaeus, 1758, Sweden.
Closely related to C. eversmanni and C. oliviae. Two subspecies recognized.
Subspecies and Distribution:
- oenas Linnaeus, 1758 - Britain N to S Scandinavia and Finland, S to Portugal and NW Africa, and E to N Iran, Caspian Sea and NE Kazakhstan (Semipalatinsk).
- yarkandensis Buturlin, 1908 - E Uzbekistan, Kirgizia and Tadjikistan E through Tien Shan and Tarim Basin to Lop Nur (E Xinjiang).
- Least Concern Enlarge map
A male preforming a courtship display, female don't show interest and flies away. Locality Dronten, Flevoland Province, Netherlands (ssp oenas)
Yoel Jimenez 10 July 2011 3 years ago 1 min 18 sec 4.7 -
A bird in the nest hole, another close to the nest hole, and another leaving the nest hole Locality Forêt de Sénart, France (ssp oenas)
Julien Rochefort 26 March 2007 7 years ago 33 sec 4.5 -
a bird foraging on the ground Locality De Glind, Barneveld, Gelderland Province, Netherlands (ssp oenas)
Wout van den Brink 7 February 2012 3 years ago 27 sec 4.3 -
Bird eating seed from top of fence post Locality Speech House, Forest of Dean, Gloucestershire, England, Great Britain (ssp oenas)
Desmond Allen 12 January 2009 2 years ago 36 sec 4.2 -
A close-view of an adult. Locality Ciudad Universitaria, Madrid City, Madrid, Spain (ssp oenas)
Javier Ortas 9 July 2006 6 years ago 30 sec 4.2 -
A bird on a tree, preening Locality Forêt de Sénart, France (ssp oenas)
Julien Rochefort 26 March 2007 7 years ago 35 sec 4.2
Two immature birds at a puddle
Locality Spiekeroog, East Frisian Islands, Lower Saxony, Germany (ssp oenas)
Mathieu W 6 September 2013 1 year ago 4.7 -
A bird on a rock.
Locality Berlin Zoo, Berlin, Germany
Josep del Hoyo 23 March 2008 5 years ago 4.4 -
Resting on a roof
Locality South Holland Province, Netherlands
Rob Belterman 24 March 2012 2 years ago 4.4 -
Looking for seeds in the field
Locality Kleizone, Kessenich, Limburg Province, Netherlands (ssp oenas)
Peter Vercruijsse 30 July 2013 1 year ago 4 -
A bird on the ground.
Locality Muel, Zaragoza, Aragón, Spain (ssp oenas)
Jesús Laborda 26 March 2012 2 years ago 4 -
A bird drinking.
Locality Muel, Zaragoza, Aragón, Spain (ssp oenas)
Jesús Laborda 26 April 2012 2 years ago 3.9
Song of a male Locality Wanstead Park, London, England, Great Britain
(ssp oenas)
Stuart Fisher 5 April 2009 5 years ago 4.5 -
Click to play
A male singing. Locality Buda Hills, Budapest, Hungary
(ssp oenas)
Eric Roualet 13 February 2014 20 weeks ago 0


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Sons of Anarchy Round Table: "Una Venta"
Where do things go from here on Sons of Anarchy? Our panelists discuss in this edition of the TV Fanatic Round Table.
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posted by: drunkteenchicksAll of you who are looking for some drunk teen action might consider visiting this dorm where drunk chicks get crazy every night and go on the fucking rampage all across the rooms.
Here you can see one of those drunk teen babes as she is having fun with a guy that had too much to drink and she is more than willing to use that to her advantage. She puts him on the chair and like all those drunk chicks she takes off his clothes and gets him ready for a really hot sex session with her and her tight slit.


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My dbay was 11/19 and I decided to go shopping. Given the looming frustrations from the incoming administration and the fact that I needed somthing and it's my bday I found this...
I know, I know. Seen one glock you've seen em all but, dang it, this one's all mine. She's a third gen G23, Night sights, and two hicap mags $425 out the door. And the shop owner even gave me a box of 180gr Magtechs and said "Happy Birthday". A buddy is letting me use his old Crossbreed IWB until I can aquire a holster of my own.
I've been eyballing Glocks for a while. I've shot many and always liked them but have never had one of my own. I normally am a 1911 guy but this deal was too good to pass up for me.
Happy Birthday to me.


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Finally, the world begins to realise it has been lusting over a butt that isn't there. A Phantom Butt if you will.
terrible spray tan. when will ppl realize that no spray tan looks good or even natural? it looks HIDEOUS!! the only tan parts of her body are her elbows, thighs and halfway down her calf. she looks dumb
and whats a "normal" tanning bed?? didnt know there were fake tanning beds…….
From that angle, she's got the figure of a 90 year old
Hey! Has anyone seen my ass? We're about to start shooting!
Even the back of her knees have track marks
Liz had a better body just before she died
She even farts coke.


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ULM News
ULM's annual art sale begins Dec. 1
In line with the holidays, the University of Louisiana at Monroe's Annual Art Sale will begin Monday, Dec. 2, and run through Friday, Dec. 5.
Louisiana Supreme Court Justice Clark is ULM's fall commencement speaker
Justice Marcus R. Clark, Louisiana Supreme Court Justice, University of Louisiana at Monroe graduate, and Sulphur native, will serve as the Commencement speaker for ULM's fall ceremony at 10 a.m., Saturday, Dec.6, in Fant-Ewing Coliseum.
ULM's Stockley wins outstanding educator award
Dr. Joshua Stockley--associate professor of political science and director of the ULM Honors Program--takes on many roles at the University of Louisiana at Monroe. Called a marvel in the classroom; the professor, director, and mentor has been awarded for his dedication to his students and his field with two teaching awards this year.
Project 17 to provide Thanksgiving dinner to ULM family
Project 17--the University of Louisiana at Monroe's united campus ministries organization, which includes Chi Alpha, the Wesley Foundation, the Catholic Campus Ministry, Warhawks for Christ, and the Baptist Collegiate Ministry-- will provide a free Thanksgiving dinner to members of the ULM family.
Bio-terrorism expert to present Ebola pandemic seminar at ULM
Colonel Stanley John Whidden M.D., Ph.D., will give a special presentation on the recent Ebola virus pandemic, at 5:30 p.m., on Monday, Nov. 24, on the University of Louisiana at Monroe campus, in the Student Union Ballroom, located on the second floor of the Student Union Building.
ULM's Hanser lectures to Chinese Military on immigration and border security
Professor Robert D. Hanser, coordinator of the criminal justice program at the University of Louisiana at Monroe, was a recent guest of the Chinese People's Armed Police Academy (CPAPFA), in Langfang, China. During his stay, Hanser provided lectures and training to border security officers and military personnel of the People's Republic of China.
ULM Dance Fusion Nov. 21
The University of Louisiana at Monroe's School of Visual and Performing Arts presents its popular Dance Fusion concert, at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Nov. 21, in ULM's Brown Auditorium.
Annual Holidays at ULM Nov. 25
The University of Louisiana at Monroe welcomes the community to the 12th annual Holidays at ULM Celebration, beginning at 5:30 p.m., Tuesday, Nov. 25, in ULM's Brown auditorium. The festivities begin with a holiday concert, followed by the popular tree lighting ceremony.
ULM School of Education to host workshops and events Nov. 17-21
The University of Louisiana at Monroe's Literacy Lab will host a series of workshops, events, and a Scholastic Book Fair, Nov. 17-21. Workshops range in subjects from autism and science, technology, engineering, and math (STEM), to a special holiday book event and fair.
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Open AccessThis article is
MDPI and ACS Style
- freely available
- re-usable
Nutrients 2013, 5(5), 1585-1594; doi:10.3390/nu5051585
Is Dietitian Use Associated with Celiac Disease Outcomes?
Received: 1 April 2013 / Revised: 6 May 2013 / Accepted: 6 May 2013 / Published: 15 May 2013
(This article belongs to the Special Issue Nutrition and Celiac Disease)
View Full-Text
Download PDF [322 KB, uploaded 15 May 2013]
Abstract: A gluten-free diet (GFD) is the treatment for celiac disease (CD), but due to its complexity, dietitian referral is uniformly recommended. We surveyed patients with CD to determine if dietitian use is associated with quality of life, symptom severity, or GFD adherence. The survey utilized three validated CD-specific instruments: the CD quality of life (CD-QOL), CD symptom index (CSI) and CD adherence test (CDAT). Four hundred and thirteen patients with biopsy-proven CD were eligible for inclusion. The majority (77%) were female and mean BMI was 24.1. Over three-quarters of patients (326, 79%) had seen a dietitian, however, 161 (39%) had seen a dietitian only once. Age, sex, and education level were not associated with dietitian use; nor was BMI (24.6 vs. 24.0, p = 0.45). On multivariate analysis, adjusting for age gender, education, duration of disease, and body mass index, dietitian use was not associated with CD-QOL, CSI, or CDAT scores. Our survey did not show an association between dietitian use and symptom severity, adherence, or quality of life. Delay in diagnosis was associated with poorer outcomes. This is a preliminary study with several limitations, and further prospective analysis is needed to evaluate the benefits and cost-effectiveness of dietitian-referral in the care of celiac disease patients.
celiac disease; dietary services; quality of life; quality improvement
This is an open access article distributed under the
Creative Commons Attribution License which permits unrestricted use, distribution,
and reproduction in any medium, provided the original work is properly cited.
Export to BibTeX | EndNote
MDPI and ACS Style
Mahadev, S.; Simpson, S.; Lebwohl, B.; Lewis, S.K.; Tennyson, C.A.; Green, P.H.R. Is Dietitian Use Associated with Celiac Disease Outcomes? Nutrients 2013, 5, 1585-1594.
AMA StyleMahadev S, Simpson S, Lebwohl B, Lewis SK, Tennyson CA, Green PHR. Is Dietitian Use Associated with Celiac Disease Outcomes? Nutrients. 2013; 5(5):1585-1594.
Chicago/Turabian StyleMahadev, SriHari; Simpson, Suzanne; Lebwohl, Benjamin; Lewis, Suzanne K.; Tennyson, Christina A.; Green, Peter H.R. 2013. "Is Dietitian Use Associated with Celiac Disease Outcomes?" Nutrients 5, no. 5: 1585-1594.
Published by MDPI AG, Basel, Switzerland
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In the News
Taking the lead on leadership training
June 9, 2011 - Northeastern and MIT co-hosted the second Bernard M. Gordon Engineering Leadership Conference. The event brought together representatives from programs across North America to discover new, innovative ways to expand the domain of engineering leadership education.
Watch the Video -
Mentor interviewed on NECN
November 22, 2010 - Gordon Program Mentor Dr. Carey Rappaport discusses airport security scanning on a recent NECN broadcast.
Watch the Video -
The Rugged Path to Engineering Leadership
November 4, 2010 - Gordon Fellow Candidates take leadership learning outside the classroom at a Field Leadership Reaction Course on Cape Cod. Read the NU Voice Article.
Read the Story -
Director Simon Pitts featured on ScienceNews
October 31, 2010 - Director Simon Pitts answers questions about the Gordon Engineering Leadership Program on a recent broadcast of the ScienceNews Radio Network.
Listen to Broadcast -
Bernie Gordon Recieves 2010 Mass High Tech Distinguished Achievement Award
October 29, 2010 - Bernie Gordon received the Distinguished Achievement Award at Mass High Tech's 15th annual All-Star awards.
Read the Article


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Nintendo presents a few handy pointers, including charge shot (differences on the shot between Isa and Kachi), bonuses (the best way to maximize score through bonuses), boss tips (shortcuts to beating bosses), and some gameplay footage from various parts of the title.
Views: 5,879 | Posted: 07/13/2010
The intense arcade-style action is back for another round on the Nintendo Wii.
Views: 125,678 | Posted: 06/25/2010
Nintendo shows us how it's done with a montage of Expert mode gameplay sure to make even the most hardcore gamers go cross-eyed.
Views: 9,421 | Posted: 06/24/2010
By: Darkbeat
DO YA LIEK TEH VIDYA GAEMS? If you like the video games, you might like "Sin and Punishment: Successor of the Skies" aka. "Star Successor" in the US. It's an excellent shooting game from Treasure, the makers of Ikaruga, Gunstar Heroes and McDonald's Treasure Land Adventure for the Sega Megadrive.
Views: 3,027 | Posted: 06/05/2010
The team at Treasure Video Games talks Star Successor in this developer featurette.
Views: 5,850 | Posted: 05/26/2010
Approach the daunting castle in the sky in this gameplay clip from Star Sucessor.
Views: 13,355 | Posted: 04/23/2010
Isa powers through robotic foes in this Wii gameplay from GDC 2010.
Views: 6,265 | Posted: 03/17/2010
Don't let weird and terrifying enemies stop you from getting a ultra-high shot combo in this shooter sequel from the creative minds at Treasure.
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The franchise gets an update with new controls and graphics on the Nintendo Wii.
Views: 13,198 | Posted: 03/01/2010
New level design and gameplay tools makes for an upgraded Sin & Punishment experience.
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Lyrics Depot | |
Lyrics » They Might Be Giants Lyrics » About Me Lyrics |
Lyrics Depot is your source of lyrics to About Me by They Might Be Giants. Please check back for more They Might Be Giants lyrics. |
About Me LyricsArtist: They Might Be GiantsAlbum: Severe Tire Damage - Greatest Hits You might be sailing 'cross the sea You might be staring at the stars, But you'll be thinking About me. Me
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Quick change chuck and extensions are easy to use. Simply select 1/4" grooved hex shank bit; slide back sleeve; load bit and release sleeve. The internal hex drive eliminates slippage. Slim diameter chuck passes through 5/8" hole.
Login Here to rate and review this product.
20-2966 - Superbonder Instant Adhesive - 416
Instant adhesives for smoothsurface materials that set-up inseconds. Bonds strength up to3500 psi. Temperature range:-65°~180°F. Two different typesavailable: 416 is a gap fillingadhesive, fills gaps up to 0.008"and 495 is a general purpose adhesive that can b...


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TRIP Linhas Aereas Joins UATP Network As New Merchant
WASHINGTON, Sept. 1, 2011 /PRNewswire/ -- TRIP Linhas Aereas, the largest regional airline in South America, is the latest airline to join UATP to address the needs of its corporate travelers and now accepts all UATP corporate cards, effective immediately at all points of sale, including online at www.voetrip.com.br.
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"In order to attend to the business travelers' high demand, we decided to join the UATP Network in efforts to expand our corporate market share in the region," said Jose Mario, president of TRIP Linhas Aereas. "Excellence in service is a priority to TRIP Linhas Aereas and to meet specific customer needs, we need to fulfill the requests for UATP Acceptance."
Client satisfaction is the core value behind TRIP Linhas Aereas and it concentrates on providing excellent service based on flexibility and technology. "Airlines are listening to corporate customers and building UATP into successful business strategies," said President and CEO Ralph Kaiser, UATP. "As the increasing challenge for market share gain continues, TRIP joined UATP to position itself to capitalize on new opportunities." Since 1998, TRIP Linhas Aereas has provided transport service in Brazil, and has expanded operations to some touristic routes including Fernando de Noronha, Natal and Recife. After 13 years of activity, the company flies to more than 80 cities, serving both tourists and business travelers. About UATP: UATP accounts are accepted as a form of payment for corporate business travel worldwide by airlines, travel agencies and Amtrak®. UATP accounts are issued by: Air New Zealand (ANZFF.PK); American Airlines (NYSE: AMR); Austrian Airlines (AUALF.PK); China Eastern Airlines Co., Ltd; Continental Airlines (NYSE: CAL); Delta Air Lines (NYSE:DAL); EL AL Israel Airlines Ltd; GOL Linhas aereas inteligentes S.A. (NYSE: GOL and Bovespa: GOLL4); Japan Airlines (JALSY.PK); Qantas Airways, Ltd. (QUBSF.PK); United Airlines (Nasdaq: UAL); and US Airways (NYSE: LCC). AirPlus International issues the UATP-based Company Account for: British Airways (LSE: BAY.L); Continental Airlines (NYSE: CAL); and Lufthansa German Airlines.Check Out Our Best Services for Investors
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2. Glaswegian
1:35 PM GMT on February 28, 2014The arctic weather continues today (Friday) Shirley, and will be with us for a week yet at least! Hope you fare better! |
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Launcher Update
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142k dps
47k hp 2800 int 4000 armor +334 AR +20k extra health from globe +17 pickup radius 5.7% life steal 0.97 attack speed GI/GF/PTV http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFIYK5vQIL0 enjoy. |
Nice video, but clearing speed is still slow IMO compared to faster attack speed setup considering that is only MP6. I would still re-roll as a barb before running with .97 attack speed. I am glad someone can stand it though ;)
thanks man. but i ran out of mana a couple of times recording this video when facing extra hp or fleeting affix. adding more attack speed will just make it worse for me. i can bump my dps another 10-20k by losing some defence/hp and use soj, which will let me have enough dps to run mp7, but at that point, my defence and healing can't keep up vs. reflects unless i use horrify armor rune. i don't see myself pushing higher unless i add more armor/ar/hp, which is too expensive to do. until blizzard does some change to reflects, i will likey stay in mp6.
Edited by Nerzaa#1863 on 12/12/2012 7:36 AM PST
I don't know which skills you were using, but for MP6 with a 2h polearm or skorn I was using zombie dogs final gift (health globe) with sacrifice pride (mana rune) and circle of life.
Circle of life would replace PtV to give more GF bonuses. I save the summon zombie dogs for elites, drop bears until mana gone, sacrifice, resummon ZD, bears, spirit walk mana rune, bears. I could also chain sacrifice in big crowds of white trash by running in with spirit walk, SH, BOOM, 1x bears, circle of life kicks in for 1~3 free dogs. Btw, I used bears/acid rain with this setup, for RD (about 400 LoH with 4.6% life steal or with skorn 1300 LoH)
Edited by MCP#1477 on 12/12/2012 9:34 AM PST
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US 4577183 A Abstract A device for protecting premises such as residences, the device comprising at least one human presence detection sensor, a processing device and reaction mechanisms. The processing unit comprises mechanisms for modifying the operation of the reaction mechanisms each time the human presence detection sensor is activated. The reaction mechanisms may be of a conventional type comprising essentially light or acoustic devices. The device comprises mechanisms for simulating a presence inside the premises, controlled by the processing unit to simulate a presence in the occupant's absence. These simulation mechanisms may include lighting of the various rooms in the protected premises and activation of a tape recorder to play back human voices.
Claims(5) 1. A device for the protection of premises such as residences, comprising two chains of human presence detection sensors, a processing unit and reaction mechanisms, one of said chains of human presence detection sensors being located outside said premises, and one of said chains of human presence detection sensors being located inside said premises, said reaction mechanisms including means for simulating a presence inside the premises, controlled by the processing unit to simulate a human presence, and said processing unit including means for modifying the operation of the reaction mechanisms each time a human presence detection sensor is activated.
2. A device as set forth in claim 1, wherein said processing unit includes means for increasing, for a definite time period, the sensitivity levels of the human presence detection sensors after these have been activated once.
3. A device as set forth in claim 1 or 2, including means controlled by the processing unit to inform the occupants of the premises that an attempted break-in has been detected by the human presence detection sensors.
4. A device as set forth in claim 1 or 2, including distant alarm mechanisms, controlled by the processing unit.
5. A device as set forth in claim 1 or 2, including means for neutralizing an intruder inside the premises.
Description 1. Related Application This application corresponds to French application No. 81/05061, filed Mar. 13, 1981, the entire disclosure of which is hereby incorporated by reference. 2. Field of the Invention The object of this invention is a device for protecting premises such as, in particular, residences, and more specifically, such a device comprising at least one human presence detection sensor, a processing device and reaction mechanisms. Conventional devices are known, wherein, when a sensor has detected a human presence, reaction mechanisms are activated, setting off light or acoustic energy, for example. However, the disadvantage of such devices is that they cannot react to a subsequent activation of the detection sensors, as the reaction is independent of the data registered by the detection sensors and is consequently independent of the subsequent behavior of the intruder. This invention is intended to obviate this disadvantage by providing a device for the protection of premises, which reacts continuously as a function of the intruder's behavior. The object of this invention is therefore a device for the protection of premises such as a residence, comprising at least one human presence detection sensor, a processing unit and reaction mechanisms, characterized by the fact that the processing unit comprises mechanisms for modifying the operation of the reaction mechanisms each time the human presence detection sensor is activated. The reaction mechanisms and the programming of their operation depends on environmental constraints, based for instance on whether the premises are in an urban or rural area, on the nature of the property to be protected, on the level of risk--that is, on the value of the goods to be protected--and on the anticipated degree of motivation of potential intruders. However, it should be understood that the primary objective of such a device is to cause the intruder to flee, and possibly to neutralize him. This device is consequently especially well adapted to the protection of residences, as opposed to other devices which are primarily designed to protect industrial facilities, for example, where it is essential to neutralize the intruder. The reaction mechanisms may be of a conventional type, that is, comprising essentially light or acoustic devices. FIG. 1 is an overall view of a device according to the invention; FIG. 2 illustrates an example of the installation of a device in accordance with FIG. 1; FIG. 3 is a drawing illustrating the operation of the device in FIG. 2; and FIG. 4 illustrates a variation of the invention. The device according to the invention operates on the closed-loop detection-reaction principle, which may intensify the reactions of the intruder, who may attain a state near panic and thus be induced to flee. According to a preferred embodiment of the invention, the processing unit is programmed to increase the sensitivity level of the human presence detection sensors for a set time period after they have been set off once. The detection sensors may in fact comprise several programmable sensitivity levels. This is especially useful for fine-tuning the analysis of the real risk of intrusion based on initial detection. The device according to the invention advantageously comprises mechanisms for simulating a presence inside the premises, controlled by the processing unit to simulate a presence in the occupant's absence. These simulation mechanisms may, for example, include lighting of the various rooms in the protected premises and activation of a tape recorder to play back human voices. According to a particular embodiment of the invention, mechanisms controlled by the processing unit, are provided to inform the occupants of the premises of an attempted break-in detected by the human presence detection sensors. The device may comprise a single chain of sensors external to the premises however, to advantage, another chain of sensors is provided on the immediate periphery of the premises, or even inside the premises. Thus, contacts or vibration sensors may be provided on the doors and windows of the premises. These devices are positioned on the immediate periphery of the premises and are designed to detect a break-in. Finally, inside the premises proper, there may be installed volumetric detectors for determining whether a break-in has in fact occurred. The sensors of the exterior chain of sensors may be of any conventional type, that is, they may either detect the energy emitted by the presence or movement of a human, such as vibration, pressure, temperature elevations, etc., or detect changes in the condition of propagation of exterior energy, such as very high frequencies or acoustic wavelengths. A distant alarm system, controlled by the processing unit, may also be provided. This alarm system may be connected to a telephone line, or to the low-frequency electric power supply circuit located in the premises. Finally, mechanisms may also be provided within the premises to neutralize the intruder inside the premises, for instance, using neutralizing gas. Preferred embodiments of the inventions shall presently be described as nonlimiting examples, reference being made to the attached schematic drawings. On FIG. 1, the broken line (1) represents the boundary of the protected premises, with the exterior located on side 2, the inside on side 3. The device according to the invention comprises, first, a chain of sensors (4) positioned on the outside to detect any human presence. The outputs of the sensors (4) are connected to a processing unit (5) situated inside the premises. The processing unit (5) ensures that information from the sensors (4) is received and processed, and provides for control functions and automatic testing of the device. Initial reaction mechanisms (6) are located outside the premises and may include conventional lighting or sound signal sources. Other reaction mechanisms (7) are positioned inside the premises, on the one hand to simulate an actual presence on the premises in the occupant's absence, and, on the other hand, to activate more powerful reactions in the case of actual entry by an intruder. Finally, mechanisms are provided for distant transfer of alarm data, comprising, for example, a telephone (8) and a transmitter (9), connected to an electric power supply line, to provide a distant alert of a break-in, based on a given level of risk. FIG. 2 illustrates an example of installation of the device schematically represented in FIG. 1. Here, the device is shown as protecting premises (10) situated on a lot (11). The sensors (4) are positioned outside the premises (10), but at a close enough distance to ensure that their activation actually corresponds to a break-in attempt. For example, in one embodiment, the sensors (4) may be units that are sensitive to vibrations caused by human movement. The processing unit (5) is situated inside the premises (10) to assume the functions described above. The reaction mechanisms (6) are represented here in the form of lighting (61) and a sound alarm (62). These reaction mechanisms are situated outside the premises. One the other hand, the reaction mechanisms (7) are situated inside the premises and comprise elements to simulate a presence inside the premises, and higher-level reaction mechanisms designed to be activated when an actual presence is detected inside the premises (10). Finally, mechanisms for distant transfer (8) of an alarm are also represented inside the premises (10), next to the processing unit (5). When the approach of an intruder is detected by the sensors (4), the reaction mechanisms (6) are immediately activated, setting off exterior night lighting (61) or emitting a sound through the alarm system (62), night or day. Mechanisms are provided to instantaneously increase sensor (4) sensitivity when this reaction occurs, so as to more accurately perceive the effects of the reaction mechanisms (61 and 62) on the intruder. The processing unit (5) is programmed to activate a new reaction when the sensors (4) emit new data, for instance, to turn off the lights or to change the sound signal, thus causing a permanent change in the intruder's environment, so as to instill a feeling of worry or even panic on his part. When the intruder has left, and if no successful break-in has occurred, the system automatically resets itself to the initial level. If the break-in attempt is successful, distant alarms are automatically set off by mechanisms (8) and the reaction mechanisms (7) are activated. Mechanisms (not shown) to alert the occupants of the premises (10) of a break-in attempt may also be added to the processing unit (5). Similarly, the sensors (4) are shown to be outside the premises (10) when they are situated on a lot (11), but they may also be situated on the periphery of these premises, for instance in the case of apartments which are surrounded by public areas, human access to which cannot be controlled. FIG. 3 is a more detailed diagram of the processing unit (5). This figure shows the inputs of the processing unit (5), originating, respectively, from the sensors (4) and from a switch (12) used to turn on the device. The outputs comprise the exterior lighting (61) and the sound alarm (62), the secondary reaction mechanisms (7) and the distant alarm transfer mechanisms (8 and 9). The sensors (4) are set up to provide analog or digital signals, depending on their type. The signals emitted by the sensors (4) are aligned by an alignment circuit (51) and instantaneously activate at least one of the exterior reaction mechanisms (61 or 62). Simultaneously, a control circuit (52) increases sensor sensitivity for a predetermined time period. The intruder's reaction then emits a new set of data which is received by the sensors and processed by the processing unit to cause either a change in the intensity level of the reaction mechanism employed, or to activate a complementary reaction mechanism. Consequently, it is apparent that the device operates as a closed loop for any reaction on the part of the intruder causing a change in its environment. The processing unit (5) additionally comprises a circuit (53) for resetting and time delay of the reaction mechanisms. A circuit (54) may also be provided to analyze simultaneous excitation of several sensors, in order to eliminate the risks of false alarms. Finally, a self-testing module (55) to inform the users of the risk of improper system operation or malfunctions, and a module (56) for temporary system neutralization when authorized persons enter or exit the premises are provided. The distant alarm mechanisms (8 and 9) are controlled by a circuit (53) to broadcast an alarm either when there is an unusually prolonged human presence near the premises, or when a successful break-in attempt has been detected. FIG. 4 represents a variation of the invention wherein other sensors are positioned inside the premises (10). In this figure, the reference point 4 was also used for the sensors in the first chain of sensors situated outside the premises. The additional sensors shown here are of two types. The sensors (13) are positioned on the doors and windows of the premises (10) in order to detect a successful break-in, while sensors 14 are positioned inside the rooms of premises 10 to indicate the actual presence of an intruder inside these premises. In case of a successful break-in, these mechanism provide for activation of reaction mechanisms such as 7, causing, for instance, an alarm to be set off or possibly sealing the exits to allow for physical neutralization of the intruders. The invention is of course not limited to the embodiments described above; the scope of the invention comprises the numerous modifications to and variations of the invention. Patent Citations
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KELLIS, John C. "Jack" 81, of Hillsboro, died Monday October 29, 2012 in his home. Born in Springboro, he was married to the love of his life, Annalyle (Green) Kellis for 44 years until her death on October 17, 1996. They owned and operated Jack's Friendly Service/Jack's Mobil, from 1953 to 1984 in Germantown. He was a member of the First Baptist Church in Franklin and then a member of the First Baptist Church in Hillsboro. He graduated from Franklin High School class of 1949. He served in the U. S. Air Force in Europe during the
Korean War
. He is survived by sons, John K. (Andie) of Pulaski,VA; and Keith of Hillsboro; daughter Cheryl (Jeff) Brandenburg of Germantown; grandson John C. (Megan) Kellis of Murfreesboro, TN; granddaughters Misty (Steve) McGarry of Roanoke, VA; Jessica (Kevin) Steiner of Springboro; great grandchildren Matthew, Conner, and Maddison McGarry; Jenna and Jake Steiner, and Zoey Kellis. In addition to his wife, he was preceded in death by his parents, Carey and Letha (Clark) Kellis, brother Dale Kellis, sisters Doris Countryman and Mary Lou Morgan. A service to celebrate his life will be held at First Baptist Church 127 S. West St. Hillsboro on Friday November 2, 2012 at 7pm with visitation from 6:30 until the service time. Also, Services will be Saturday November 3, 2012 at 1pm at Anderson Funeral Home 1357 E. 2nd St. The services will be officiated by Todd Toole, Josh McFarland, and John Christian Kellis. Burial will be in Springboro Cemetery. Visitation will be from 11am until the time of the service. Please visit
to send an on line condolence.
Published in Dayton Daily News on Nov. 2, 2012
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Toddler Vomiting while sleeping.
My 3 year old has woken up around the same time for the past four nights, crying and then
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Suggest medication for vomiting and loose motion in a toddler
Hi My daugter is 19 months old. From last evening she
thrice. We have her emeset 2.5ml and ORS around 9:30 pm. She did not had any solid food. I just gave a glass of milk and did breast feeding ...
What causes diarrhea and vomiting in toddler?
Today, my 8 month old son (out of no where) began power puking . He s
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1 evening. Then daily diarrhoea and some intermittent
the next 8 days. On day 4 took ...
tonite. We are from Canada travelling in Mexico. Daughter was sick in Canada BEFORE we took trip ...
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murmur ? ...
What causes vomiting and red spots on buttocks in a toddler?
Hello my 2 year old daughter
on Wednesday afternoon then again on Thursday morning. Se has not
again and never had a fever. Thursday afternoon she developed red spots on her buttocks and thighs ...
Could vomiting after a head trauma in a toddler be a matter of concern?
My 2 and half year old fell and hit back of right side of head on concrete. Cried hysterically and then threw up 15 minutes later. Seemed groggy and out of hit but with in 2 hrs was back k self. Now he started throwing up again and just fell...
What causes vomiting and low grade fever in toddler?
I have a
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Can viral infections cause vomiting with stomach pain in toddlers?
Hi My 2 yr old son has been
for the past 3 nights...mainly milk after he has some..took him to doctor yesterday and she told me to stop giving himmilk for a few days, not to worry too much ...
What causes abdomen pain, vomiting and diarrhea in a toddler?
intermittent severe ABD pain, occasional
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beat faster than adults?
Hi, Yes...adult
rate is about 60-80 beats/min....whereas
is about 100-130 beats/min. Dr. Ashish Verma
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poop smells like rubber tires?
If he has other complaints as loose stool, loss of appetite, nausea,
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fell and hit the side of his head last now now today he has diahreah and is very tired
Hi, I have gone through your query and understood you concerns. Diarrhoea has nothing related to the incident. If
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I want to state how disappointed I am with the town of Lowville voters. The results of the recent primary held Sept. 10 are disappointing in the least, and I can only imagine this was a result of the town residents not really knowing the candidates they were voting for.
I have worked for Judge Asa Holbrook for the last 12 years. Judge Holbrook expects you to give 100 percent. He does not believe in letting things slide or get carelessly put aside.
He believes when you have a job to do, you do it to the best of your abilities. He doesnt believe in playing games with the court system, and he requires you to follow through.
You may want to question the ethics of his opponents(s). He is not asking anymore of you than what he would do himself. Some people cannot handle his high standards and work ethic.
Have you sat in his court? If you have not, you should before voting in the regular election.
What will you see when you observe Judge Holbrook at work? You will see a bluntly honest, law-abiding professional. Can Judge Holbrook be stern? You bet. Will Judge Holbrook take any nonsense? Absolutely not. Does he have a reputation of being hard nosed? Sure, but who would you like upholding our laws? When a defendant is found guilty, what do you want the judge to do? Send them off with slap on their hands or with a proper punishment that will make them think twice before they do the crime again? Judge Holbrook doles out punishments according to the law.
I started with the town of Lowville because they needed help, and I offered my services. I never expected to still be there after 12 years.
I am still there because I admire Judge Holbrooks work ethic, his professionalism, his dedication, loyalty and trustworthiness. My recommendation to the town of Lowville voters is to reconsider your candidates when it comes to Novembers election. Do you need a judge who has more than 30 years of law enforcement experience, is loyal to a fault, trustworthy and hard-working?
Vote Asa Holbrook for town of Lowville justice on the Conservative line.
Dawn Ashline