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Tuesday, November 11Stanger Danger.
A few months ago, the above graphic popped up on my TV screen, causing me to spit out an entire mouthful of Blueberry Morning in a fit of wheezing laughter.
NBC 15 is my local news channel of choice here in Madison. I like the anchors, I like their approach to reporting, and most importantly, my good friend is employed there. I don't bust people on the Internet much for their grammar, but I snapped a 'Stanger Danger' photo so I could text it to my employed friend and engage in some good-natured ribbing regarding the nonexistent proofreading staff of NBC 15. I also joked that I would continue sending him photos like this every time they screwed up, because spelling errors were bad, and he should feel bad, even if he had nothing to do with it.
I was kidding. I don't pay close enough attention to the news to notice this stuff unless it's literally 50 inches across like the one above.
But then, a funny thing happened: They kept screwing up, and I kept noticing.
(On the raod again. I'm convinced this is what began the Milwaukee Brewers' cursed tailspin right out of the Playoffs.)
(Gotta watch out for that wet wather, weather or not you care about the whether.)
It didn't take long for my friend to no longer think this was funny. Perhaps he has a limited Data Plan when it comes to texting; I thought this was hilarious and refused to quit. Besides, I've got nothing better to do.
Now, I watch the news maybe three times a week, and I only pay attention to it about once a week. So by my calculations, considering how many times I was seeing stuff like this, there are approximately 18 thousand errors on NBC 15 every minute of every day.* It felt like every time I looked up at my television, something very wrong was being projected back at me.
(*Your math may vary.)
(Yes, the headline is worrisome and we should be focused on what's important. But I couldn't sit idly by while 'nealy' floated across my TV screen like a turd in a pool. We can worry about the budget later. Or never. Hey, it is Wisconsin after all.)
('Occasional' is a difficult word to spell from memory, I'll admit. Fortunately, Spell Check was invented 30 years ago.)
According to my friend (and from my logical deductions), working at a local news station is a fast-paced, deadline-chasing race against the clock. There sometimes isn't enough time to, you know, look at the monitor before you hit that 'sumbit' button that publishes your work to the airwaves. I get that; but man, the errors just kept on a comin'.
(Sumbit. So you didn't have to, I went to that website. It's available for purchase, as it currently doesn't exist on this or any other planet.)
(I've looked at this one about a dozen times and I still have no idea what message it's supposed to convey. It may, in fact, be a broadcast from another dimension where it snows in August and nothing is what it seems.)
I eventually gave up on snapping a photo every time I saw an error (they certainly haven't stopped). My friend was threatening to bash my skull in with a crescent wrench, and the whole thing began to make me sort of depressed as well.
I mean, look. If you're in the market for a cheap proofreader, NBC 15, I'm your guy. I'm an insomniac with OCD and a valid Driver's License. Just run the copy by me beforehand. It wouldn't take any more than 10 minutes, 15 if I had been drinking the night before.
Please hurry.
Sound off in the comments section, rightfully call me a hypocrite because of all the grammatical errors I've made over the years, and enjoy the rest of your week.
Monday, September 29Let's Get This Over With.
I never thought this day would come, but my phone got hacked. In order to preemptively cut this whole mess off before it gets out of hand, I wanted to just go ahead and publish the incriminating video here on the CDP, in the hopes that it's never discussed again. I apologize to my wife, friends and family.
Turn up the sound if you must.
Monday, September 15Have A Super Sonic Day.
I left work early a couple of Tuesdays ago. There wasn't a whole lot going on at the office, so I figured I could better utilize my time around the house, watching DVR'd Simpsons episodes and vacuuming the spiderwebs out of my garage. Instead of using several vacation days at a time, I usually opt for the few-hours-at-a-time approach whenever I feel like a Mental Health Afternoon is necessary for my well-being (and the well-being of those within roundhouse kick range of me).
Before I got home, I drove through Sonic for a grilled cheese. This particular Sonic is about a mile from my home, and for the six weeks it's been open, the place has been complete anarchy. The food is suspect at best, ordering mozzarella sticks takes three hours, and they'll be dead in the cold ground before you can special order anything. I once asked for a sundae with chocolate ice cream, and they said they "couldn't do that." Whatever, dude. I stick with the grilled cheese because I'm still pretending to be a vegetarian and it's the one item they screw up the least.
It still took around 10 minutes. Good thing I had nowhere to be.
It was around lunchtime as I sat in my car and waited for my food. As my mind began to wander, I realized that it was also lunchtime for the local school, which functioned as an 'open campus' for the hour. For those who grew up without such a luxury (like me), an 'open campus' allows you to leave the school grounds for lunchtime and eat wherever you want (fast food, gas station, landfill), provided that you're back on time. This meant that Sonic, a restaurant about a block from the school, was crawling with children of all ages.
The Tuesday after Labor Day was also the first day of school, and the energy was in the air. When I had left my house that morning, I saw a group of kids in my subdivision waiting for the bus, and I nearly had a full-blown panic attack. When I think back to my first days of school, every memory is that of pure, unbridled terror. I was a fair student, had plenty of friends and only got my ass kicked when I deserved it, but the PTSD always hangs low in the air. I firmly empathize with any child who was dragged screaming and fear-peeing onto a school bus that morning. I'm at an age where I should be preparing my own child for another year of public school, but in reality, I still connect a lot more with the kid begging to stay home. I feel you, little homies.
On Facebook that day, my News Feed was flooded with friends' photos of their children getting ready for their first day back. Most of the comments were positive and congratulatory, but it's in my nature to privately scoff and scroll ahead as quickly as possible. I hated school, I don't have kids, and I'm not interested in anyone else's. I've...been pretty clear about this.
However, as I was sitting in my car, waiting for my grilled cheese, something happened. Something that had never happened to me before in my life. And frankly, it scared the shit out of me.
I looked out my window and saw an adorable, beaming little girl. Brand new pink shirt. Brand new matching skirt. Crispy pink backpack without a scratch on it. Holding her smiling mother's hand as they both shared a milkshake and walked back to school for the afternoon. The weather was perfect. The sun was shining, and they both seemed extremely happy. I, on the other hand, was getting ready to eat a grilled cheese in front of the TV, and waste away the remainder of this perfect day by watching anime until my wife came home.
In that split second, I felt like my life had literally no purpose because I wasn't the parent of a child, and that I was finally ready to become one. It was a thought I had never let deep enough into my brain to even analyze, so when I did, it shook me like an existential crisis.
Oh, goddamn. I thought about how I was going to explain this change of heart to my wife. I thought about all the plans we were going to have to make. All the plans we were going to have to change. All the money we'd need to start saving. All the money we didn't have and never would have. We'd have to remodel the office, of course. Probably finish the basement. One of us would probably have to quit their job for awhile. We'd have to pick a good school. A great one. How much TV should a kid watch? None? How much should we limit their Internet usage? Who will watch them when we need a sitter? Will I need to throw all the liquor bottles away? Why did I waste all that money on a WiiU? I don't even play it!
In the past, this flood of logistical planning and strategic forecasting would be enough to stop the thought of having a baby dead in its tracks. Whenever I thought about it for longer than a second, I eventually convinced myself that it was a terrible idea, that I wasn't ready and we shouldn't even think about it for another five years. Unfortunately, this didn't work. As I watched this mother and daughter skip happily away, I longed to experience that moment. I wanted it more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. I thought about walking my daughter to school, freshly sporting the supplies we had picked out together the week before, and in the moment it seemed like the most heavenly experience in the world.
"Shit," I said out loud to myself. "I think I want to have a baby."
I was shaking in the car. I felt like I was going to throw up. This was a genuine moment.
I'm not a religious man, but this was a serious precipice in my evolution here, and I sincerely could have used a little guidance from Above. I didn't have any friends or relatives I could call at noon on a Tuesday for perspective, and the drive-thru of a Sonic wasn't exactly the sort of place where a spark of divine intervention would typically shine though. Although I was planning to check my grilled cheese to see if the Virgin Mary's face was visible in the grill marks. Wouldn't hurt, I figured.
But then, it hit me. Inspiration from above, and not a moment too soon.
Off in the distance, atop a pile of decorative landscaping surrounding the perimeter of Sonic, I saw him. A little boy, about 7 or 8. By himself, ruthlessly ripping out the plants, cattails and foliage, and throwing them haphazardly into the street in huge clumps.
He was basically feral. Dirt on his face. Sticky hands. He didn't look like he was headed back to school, or anywhere that didn't involve a padlock and water dish, frankly. He seemed plenty occupied with destroying the plant life like it was his profession. When he would uproot a cattail, he would wield it at passing cars like a samurai sword, kicking up soil with each mighty stomp. He was almost hit and killed a good three or four times. Horns were honking relentlessly. I had to think that one of them called the cops.
He was an asshole. He was unsupervised. He was me, and he was the living embodiment of every reason I've ever talked myself out of having children. That would be the one I get. No question about it.
Finally, his mother emerged from the Sonic with a large soda, which he snapped from her hands without so much as a Thank You. The mother looked like she wanted to scold him, but was too exhausted and busy with the infant she was balancing with her other arm, all while holding more food, a phone and her purse. Once she managed to stuff everything into her undersized car, the boy proceeded to kick the side panel of the passenger seat until she opened the door for him and sped off. He wasn't buckled.
Just then, my grilled cheese arrived, and I decided that I wasn't ready to have a baby just yet. My earlier feelings had dissipated after seeing a far more realistic projection of why my life as a Father would truly entail.
The beaming girl with her mother was the best-case scenario. It was a scenario that could happen to my wife and I, through hard work and a shitload of genetic luck (I can't really tell my sperm what to do). And I would love and cherish her as much as I hypothesized I would...but the boy throwing plants into the street was probably a better snapshot of what my future would hold. The Missus and I were beyond difficult children to deal with, and even though we'd parent the hell out of whatever kid we ended up with, I knew that fate wasn't in our favor.
Win or lose, I've always played the odds when it came to big decisions, and between the Missus and I, we sort of selfishly assumed that there was a fairly good chance we'd have a baby we didn't like and it would ruin our marriage and lives, spiraling us straight into the gutter until one of us shanked the other with the lid of a baby formula can. I know people always say that you're in control of what your child is to become, and you'll love them unconditionally regardless, but I call 100% bullshit to that noise. You're not always in control of what your child is to become. Not even close. That's an argument so ridiculous it isn't worth arguing. Plenty of great parents have awful children, and it's not their fault (unless it is, which also totally happens).
Look, I know that if you want a kid, you'll have a kid and work with whatever you're given; that's what good people do. My wife and I strive to be good people, and when the time comes where we truly feel ready for the responsibility of parenting a child, we will stop at absolutely nothing to push every last chip into the center of the table to ensure their future success (even if it does end up being a boy).
But as I drove from Sonic with a grilled cheese in my hand, I was looking forward to an empty house.
If only for the time being.
Tuesday, September 2The CDP 2014-2015 Fall TV Preview.
For the 9th goddamn year, the CDP is back with the scoop on 50 new, returning and canceled TV shows. These are the shows that I will be watching (or at least giving a chance to) this fall. All times are Central and the time slot information is accurate as of the date this was written. I also stuck with mostly national TV and some basic cable; I did not include premium channels, because the CDP is accommodating to TV fans in all tax brackets and considers piracy a crime literally worse than mass murder.
And hey, if this preview isn't enough for you, feel free to take a trip in the Wayback Machine to see my 8 other Fall Previews:
2005-2006 Preview. (Remember Invasion and Night Stalker?)
2006-2007 Preview. (Remember The Unit and Studio 60?)
2007-2008 Preview. (Remember Kid Nation and Carpoolers?)
2008-2009 Preview. (Remember The Goode Family and Lipstick Jungle?)
2009-2010 Preview. (Remember Time Warp and FlashForward?)
2010-2011 Preview. (Remember Detroit 1-8-7 and Better With You?)
2011-2012 Preview. (Remember Alcatraz and Awake?)
2013-2014 Preview. (Remember Animal Practice and The Neighbors?)
Let's do this, starting from the top.
6-7p - America's Funniest Home Videos (ABC - 10/5)
6:30-7p - Bob's Burgers (FOX - 10/5)
7-7:30p - The Simpsons (FOX - 9/28)
7-8p - Once Upon A Time (ABC - 9/28)
7-10p - Sunday Night Football (NBC - 9/4)
7:30-8p - Brooklyn Nine-Nine (FOX - 9/28)
8-9p - The Walking Dead (AMC - 10/12)
8:30-9p - Mulaney (FOX - 10/5)
9-10p - Talking Dead (AMC - 10/12)
The Skinny! - Timeslot mainstay AFV brings the (scrotal) pain at 6, followed by the best animated series on TV, Bob's Burgers. The Simpsons begins Season 26 on the heels of their record-breaking marathon on FXX, and Once Upon A Time brings their neverending fairytale to ABC at 7. FOX comedies Brooklyn Nine-Nine and newcomer Mulaney have the unenviable task of going up against Sunday Night Football. And where some shows begin to coast and lose their audience after 4 seasons, The Walking Dead only gets bigger, badder and decapitate-ier as we roll into the much-anticipated Season 5.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - The Walking Dead continues to be a ratings anomaly and is arguably the best show on television. Put the kids to bed and jump on board. Then go back and watch every other episode.
7-8p - Gotham (FOX - 9/22)
7-8p - Antiques Roadshow (PBS - 9/22)
7-10p - Monday Night Raw (USA - Ongoing)
7:30-10:30p - Monday Night Football (ESPN - 9/8)
9-9:30p - Louie (FX - Midseason)
The Skinny! - Please let Gotham be awesome and make me forget that Ben Affleck is now donning the rubber suit. Elsewhere, Antiques Roadshow appraises 2 THE EXTREME at 7, Monday Night Raw holds fast as the most-watched weekly show on cable, and Monday Night Football showers us with concussions, illegal contact penalties and commercials for Hooters. God help me, I love football so much. Finally, Louie returns for a truncated Season 5, which is better than nothing, which is exactly what we received in 2013.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - If nick-knacks, football, superheroes and wrasslin' aren't for you, there's plenty to be excited for when it comes to Louie.
7-8p - The Flash (CW - 10/7)
8-9p - Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC - 9/23)
8-9p - Agent Carter (ABC - Midseason)
The Skinny! - It's Nerd Night in America, as The Flash, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. and Marvel spinoff Agent Carter make you forget about how terrible and lonely your life is.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - Who knows how good Agent Carter and The Flash will turn out to be, but Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. started good and ended better, so they're definitely earning prime space on my DVR.
7-7:30p - The Middle (ABC - 9/24)
7:30-8p - The Goldbergs (ABC - 9/24)
8-8:30p - Modern Family (ABC - 9/24)
8-9p - Mythbusters (DISC - Midseason)
8-9p - Red Band Society (FOX - 9/17)
9-10p - Nashville (ABC - 9/24)
9-10p - The Ultimate Fighter (FS1 - 9/10)
The Skinny! - Wednesday night starts off with solid comedies The Middle, Modern Family and (the exceptional) The Goldbergs on ABC. On cable, Mythbusters returns for another season of putting urban legends to bed, while Red Band Society tries to be Glee in a children's hospital or something (I'm unclear on the details, but it looks cute). The Ultimate Fighter returns with an all-female lineup of terrifying martial artists competing for the UFC's inaugural 115lb. title, and Nashville brings the heartbreak at 9.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - Modern Family poops emmys and justifiably so, but I wholeheartedly believe that The Goldbergs is one of the best shows on TV right now, especially for children of the 1980's.
6-6:15p - Adventure Time (TOON - Midseason)
6:30-6:45p - Regular Show (TOON - Midseason)
7-7:30p - Parks and Recreation (NBC - Midseason)
7-10p - Thursday Night Football (CBS - 9/11)
8-9p - Gracepoint (FOX - 10/2)
9-9:30p - Maron (IFC - Midseason)
9-10p - Secrets and Lies (ABC - Midseason)
The Skinny! - Adventure Time and Regular Show are the perfect yin and yang of the Cartoon Network (the decriminalization of marijuana only did favors for these shows), while Parks and Recreation begins their 7th and final (sniff) season on NBC. Thursday Night Football premieres on free TV this year, while Gracepoint is a new crime drama starring David Tennant. Maron appears to be getting better with each episode, and Secrets and Lies looks to bring a good old-fashioned murder mystery back to ABC.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - You watch Parks and Recreation. There's no question about it. It's sincerely one of the greatest NBC comedies ever made, and that's saying something.
7-9p - Friday Night Smackdown (SYFY - Ongoing)
9-10p - Constantine (NBC - 10/24)
The Skinny! - BORK LASER SAY IF YOU NO WATCH SMACKDOWN I KILL YOUR BODY.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - Constantine is about an enigmatic and irreverent con man-turned-reluctant supernatural detective who is thrust into the role of defending us against dark forces from beyond. So yeah, we're all going to watch that.
But seriously though, Brock Lesnar will find you and kill you.
7-7:30p - Cops (SPIKE - 8/23)
10:30p-5a - Toonami* (TOON - Ongoing)
(*Toonami's lineup currently consists of Attack On Titan, Space Dandy, Bleach, Naruto Shippuden, One Piece, Gurren Lagann, Beware The Batman, Black Lagoon, Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood, Cowboy Bebop, Star Wars: The Clone Wars and Samurai Jack.)
The Skinny! - Look, you should have fun on Saturday. Spend time with your loved ones, have a drink and a few laughs, but be sure to get your ass back to the television by the time Toonami begins. And don't plan on sleeping, either, because it runs all night. As a warm-up, new episodes of Cops continue to air on Spike.
But I Can Only Watch One Show! - You watch the SHIT out of Attack On Titan.
Most of the shows that left our televisions last season wholly deserved to. And let's face it, most of the new shows premiering this year will do the same, if they're lucky enough to even make it through a full episode run. If you noticed, there aren't a lot of new shows that made my list this year. But there are two shows worth noting: One that is moving to the scary new world of online streaming, and one that may go down as the greatest Drama in TV history.
Breaking Bad swept the Emmys for two years in a row, set Guinness records for critical acclaim, and most impressively, won the massive, 128-show, two month long CDP TV 25 Tournament to determine the Greatest TV Show of the Last 25 Years. It deserved everything it got, and it stands to reason that history will be nothing but kind to this one-of-a-kind masterpiece.
The story of Community is astounding. A show so weird it had no business being on NBC, getting cancelled only to be revived due to fan outcry, having their creator fired and then reinstated, and finally being revived for a 6th season on Yahoo! Screen. Wow. This is one of the few web-based shows I will definitely be watching this season; Jeff Winger and company are characters worthy of being followed.
Well, there you have it. The scoop on my personal Fall TV schedule, for the 9th year running. Set your DVR's, sound off in the comments section and enjoy your week. Don't forget to tell me the shows you plan on watching on My Twitter and over on My Facebook. And hey, go buy one of my books while you're at it. Thanks much; have a good one.
Friday, August 29The Top 100 Simpsons Episodes Of All-Time: #10-1.
#10 – 'Viva Ned Flanders'
Season 10 – Episode 10 (Episode 213 Overall)
Synopsis – When Ned Flanders reveals that he is 60 years old and looks young because he has done nothing exciting in his life, Homer decides to take him to Las Vegas, where, after a night of drunken partying, they end up married to two derelict barmaids.
#9 – 'Life On The Fast Lane'
Season 1 – Episode 9 (Episode 9 Overall)
Synopsis – Having forgotten about Marge's birthday, Homer rushes to the Springfield mall and impulsively buys her a bowling ball. Marge is not impressed with the gift and after discovering that he intends to use it, she decides to spite him by going bowling herself. While at the alley, she meets Jacques, a charming French bowling instructor, who offers her lessons. Jacques begins to fall for Marge and Marge undergoes a moral dilemma.
#8 – 'Behind The Laughter'
Season 11 – Episode 22 (Episode 248 Overall)
Synopsis – In a parody of VH1's Behind The Music, viewers take an inside look at The Simpsons' rise to fame, and the many scandals, feuds, and break-ups that threatened to end the show and split up the family.
#7 – 'Itchy and Scratchy Land'
Season 6 – Episode 4 (Episode 107 Overall)
Synopsis – Bart and Lisa convince their parents to take their family vacation at the newly opened Itchy and Scratchy Land. The vacation seems to be going well, until Bart and Homer are both apprehended by the park security for assaulting a staff member dressed in an Itchy suit. Professor Frink realizes that all of the park's Itchy & Scratchy robots will turn on their masters; an event which proves true as a horde of Itchy and Scratchy robots advance on the Simpsons.
#6 – 'Marge vs. The Monorail'
Season 4 – Episode 12 (Episode 71 Overall)
Synopsis – After Mr. Burns is caught storing his excess nuclear waste inside Springfield Park's trees, he is ordered to pay the town $3 million. The town is originally set to use the money to fix Main Street, but the charismatic Lyle Lanley interrupts and convinces the town to use the money to buy one of his monorails.
#5 – 'The City Of New York vs. Homer Simpson'
Season 9 – Episode 1 (Episode 179 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer allows Barney to use his car when Barney is picked to be the designated driver for that night at Moe's Tavern. However, Barney disappears for two months with the car and returns without it. Homer searches for his car and eventually receives a letter from the City of New York. The family is excited to go there to obtain the car, but Homer, who had a bad experience in New York when he was younger, is reluctant.
#4 – 'You Only Move Twice'
Season 8 – Episode 2 (Episode 155 Overall)
Synopsis – When Homer accepts a new job at the Globex Corporation, the Simpson family moves to Cypress Creek. Homer enjoys his new work and his easy-going boss, but is completely unaware that his boss is an evil genius and that the company is a vehicle for international extortion. The rest of the family have trouble settling in Cypress Creek and Homer must make a choice between Cypress Creek and Springfield.
#3 – 'Selma's Choice'
Season 4 – Episode 13 (Episode 72 Overall)
Synopsis – Marge's Great Aunt Gladys Bouvier dies and the Simpsons, Patty, and Selma attend her funeral. During the reading of her video will, Gladys tells Patty and Selma not to die lonely and miserable like she did. Though Patty doesn't care, Selma decides that she wants a baby. Meanwhile, Homer eats a spoiled hoagie, and becomes dreadfully ill. As a result, he can not fulfill his promise of taking Bart and Lisa to Duff Gardens and Selma agrees to take them instead.
#2 – 'Colonel Homer'
Season 3 – Episode 20 (Episode 55 Overall)
Synopsis – After Homer's behavior at the movie theater embarrasses Marge, they have a large argument, causing Homer to head to a redneck bar where he meets a beautiful barmaid named Lurleen Lumpkin with a talent for singing. Homer becomes her manager and does everything he can to make Lurleen famous, but it takes a very long time for him to notice Lurleen has fallen in love with him. With Marge already upset and thinking Homer's the one with the roving eyes, it's time for him to decide on his romantic future.
#1 – 'Last Exit To Springfield' - READ THIS!
Season 4 – Episode 17 (Episode 76 Overall)
Synopsis – After learning that Mr. Burns' decision to revoke their dental plan has coincided with Lisa needing braces, Homer convinces his coworkers not to give up their dental plan and becomes the new head of the workers union at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. He holds talks with Mr. Burns, but these go badly because Homer is not intelligent enough to understand Burns' sly innuendos. The plant goes on strike and Mr. Burns decides to take away the electricity for the entire town. However, this encourages the workers union and Burns decides to reach a deal with Homer.
Thursday, August 28The Top 100 Simpsons Episodes Of All-Time: #20-11.
#20 – 'Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife'
Season 17 – Episode 15 (Episode 371 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer's obsession with Lenny's new plasma TV prompts Marge to enter the family in a sweepstakes. Against Marge's wishes, Homer signs them up for a Trading Spouses/Wife Swap-style reality show and is forced to take in a controlling wife, while Marge moves in with a beaten-down husband and his perfect son.
#19 – 'E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt)'
Season 11 – Episode 5 (Episode 231 Overall)
Synopsis – Inspired by a cheesy "Zorro" movie, Homer begins slapping people with a glove and challenging them to duels (with the victims giving Homer whatever he wants instead of accepting the challenge). But when a real Southern gentleman accepts Homer's request for a duel, The Simpsons run off to the old farm Homer lived in with his parents, and breed a dangerously addictive tobacco/tomato hybrid called "Tomacco."
#18 – 'How I Spent My Strummer Vacation'
Season 14 – Episode 2 (Episode 293 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer goes to a rock and roll camp, run by the Rolling Stones, after confessing on a hidden camera show that he hates his family and his job.
#17 – 'New Kid On The Block'
Season 4 – Episode 8 (Episode 67 Overall)
Synopsis – The Simpsons' next door neighbors move and are replaced by a single mother, Ruth Powers and her daughter Laura. Laura becomes the object of Bart's affection but Bart becomes heart broken after learning that her boyfriend is Jimbo Jones. Meanwhile, Homer wages war against the Sea Captain's seafood restaurant The Frying Dutchman, for falsely advertising their "all-you-can-eat" buffet.
#16 – 'Treehouse Of Horror V'
Season 6 – Episode 6 (Episode 109 Overall)
Synopsis – A Halloween special which is divided into three short stories:
'The Shinning' – A parody of the film The Shining, in which Homer tries to kill the rest of the family after Mr. Burns cuts off the beer supply and cable TV in his winter home.
'Time and Punishment' – Whilst attempting to fix it, Homer creates a time machine out of his toaster.
'Nightmare Cafeteria' – To solve the problems of overcrowded detention and lack of meat, the Springfield Elementary teachers resort to eating the students.
#15 – 'Bart On The Road'
Season 7 – Episode 20 (Episode 148 Overall)
Synopsis – While stuck at the DMV with Patty and Selma on "Go To Work With Your Parents Day," Bart creates a fake driver's license for himself and uses it to go on a spring break road trip. Bart and his friends decide to go to the World's fair in Knoxville, but discover that their guide book is outdated and the fair ended years ago.
#14 – 'The Otto Show'
Season 3 – Episode 22 (Episode 57 Overall)
Synopsis – Otto crashes the school bus, and is later discovered that he never actually owned a real driver's license, prompting authorities to fire him. Otto then moves in with the Simpsons after he has been evicted. Meanwhile, after attending a Spinal Tap concert, Bart decides he wants to be a rock star.
#13 – 'The Way We Was'
Season 2 – Episode 12 (Episode 25 Overall)
Synopsis – In the first Simpsons flashback episode, Marge tells the story of how she and Homer met in high school in 1974. Marge and Homer meet for the first time during detention and he immediately tries to get Marge to be his date for the prom. She initially agrees, but ends up attending with Artie Ziff. In the end, Marge regrets going with Artie, and reveals that she has fallen in love with Homer.
#12 – 'Homer Badman'
Season 6 – Episode 9 (Episode 112 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer and Marge attend a candy convention, where Homer successfully steals a gummy Venus de Milo. Later, after Homer takes the children's babysitter home, he notices that the gummy Venus has become stuck to her pants and grabs it, an action that Ashley misinterprets as a sexual advance. A mob of protesters soon appear at the Simpsons' house, claiming that Homer sexually harassed Ashley.
#11 – 'Homer's Phobia'
Season 8 – Episode 15 (Episode 168 Overall)
Synopsis – The family tries to sell an old heirloom at a collectibles store and strike up a relationship with John, the store owner. The Simpsons invite John over to their house to assess their other belongings and Homer takes a liking to him. Marge then informs Homer that John is gay and he refuses to see him again. Afterwards Homer notices changes in Bart's behavior and fears that John has turned him into a homosexual.
Wednesday, August 27The Top 100 Simpsons Episodes Of All-Time: #30-21.
#30 – 'Marge Be Not Proud'
Season 7 – Episode 11 (Episode 139 Overall)
Synopsis – Bart attempts to shoplift a popular video game at the local Try-N-Save but is caught by the security guard. The guard tells Bart to never set foot in the store again and leaves a message on the Simpson family's answering machine. Bart manages to stop Homer and Marge from finding out, but is later dismayed when he finds out that the entire family is going to Try-N-Save for the family's Christmas photo.
#29 – 'That 90's Show'
Season 19 – Episode 11 (Episode 411 Overall)
Synopsis – After discovering Marge's diploma, Homer recounts the story of how he gave up his dreams of being a musician so Marge could attend Springfield University. However, after she became attracted to one of her professors, Homer started focusing his emotions into music and formed the first Grunge band.
#28 – 'The Seemingly Never-Ending Story'
Season 17 – Episode 13 (Episode 369 Overall)
Synopsis – While cave exploring with his family, Homer causes the cave to crumble and finds himself stuck upside down in the ceiling. Marge and Bart search for help while Lisa passes the time by telling Homer a story, which turns into a chain of narrated tales that, bit by bit, explain why The Simpsons are spending the day at Carl's Dad Caverns.
#27 – 'A Milhouse Divided'
Season 8 – Episode 6 (Episode 159 Overall)
Synopsis – Kirk and Luann Van Houten's marriage is in trouble and at a dinner party at the Simpson house Luann announces that she wants a divorce. Homer is confident that it will never happen to him, but Kirk tells him how quickly things can change. He realizes that he has taken his marriage for granted and overcompensates by smothering Marge. Deciding that their marriage is finished, Homer secretly files for a divorce from Marge.
#26 – 'Deep Space Homer'
Season 5 – Episode 15 (Episode 96 Overall)
Synopsis – NASA decides that they need to hire average joes in order to get higher television ratings. They recruit Homer and Barney to train to be the first average American in space. Homer, who wants to be respected, is the winner by default, and goes into space with Buzz Aldrin.
#25 – 'One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish'
Season 2 – Episode 11 (Episode 24 Overall)
Synopsis – The Simpsons go to a new Sushi bar, where Homer takes a liking to the food and decides to try Fugu, which is poisonous if not cut properly. Homer's fugu is not, and he is taken to the hospital where he is told he has 22 hours to live.
#24 – 'Eternal Moonshine Of The Simpson Mind'
Season 19 – Episode 9 (Episode 409 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer wakes up in the snow with no memory from the night before, and Moe informs him he drank a "Forget-Me-Shot," a drink powerful enough to rid the previous 24 hours from a user's mind. With his family missing, Chief Wiggum and Ned Flanders tell him of a domestic disturbance from the night before, prompting Homer to worry he may have done something awful and tries to regain his memories with help from Professor Frink. After gaining portions of his memory, Homer believes Marge cheated on him.
#23 – 'Homer At The Bat'
Season 3 – Episode 17 (Episode 52 Overall)
Synopsis – The Springfield Nuclear Power Plant softball team proves to be a huge success with Homer as their official star player. But after Mr. Burns makes a bet with Shelbyville Nuclear Power Plant owner Aristotle Amadopoulis, he hires nine professional baseball players to fill out the team. However, eight of those ringers fall victim to separate misfortunes, and Burns is forced to turn to his regular employees.
#22 – 'Beyond Blunderdome'
Season 11 – Episode 1 (Episode 227 Overall)
Synopsis – Mel Gibson admires Homer's brutal honesty during a test screening of Gibson's latest movie (a remake of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington) and hires him to create a better ending. However, when the ending proves to be too controversial, Mel and Homer end up on the run from studio executives while Marge and the kids see the sights of Hollywood.
#21 – 'Mother Simpson'
Season 7 – Episode 8 (Episode 136 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer fakes his death in order to get out of working on a Saturday and is later forced to go to the records office to verify that he is alive. The clerk reveals that Homer's mother is still alive, and he takes her home to meet his family, but she remains silent as to where she was for the past 27 years. The family finally forces her to reveal her secret: she was part of group of Hippie radicals in the 60s and is on the run from Mr. Burns and the FBI.
Tuesday, August 26The Top 100 Simpsons Episodes Of All-Time: #40-31.
#40 – 'Flaming Moe's'
Season 3 – Episode 10 (Episode 45 Overall)
Synopsis – One night at Moe's Tavern, Homer tells Moe of a secret alcoholic cocktail made with cough syrup and fire that he calls "Flaming Homer." When Moe tries Homer's recipe in the bar, he finds it boosts his business and patronage, so Moe steals the recipe from Homer.
#39 – 'Homer Goes To College'
Season 5 – Episode 3 (Episode 84 Overall)
Synopsis – After failing a test at the nuclear plant, Homer's lack of a college degree is revealed and he is sent back to pass a nuclear physics class. Homer, having seen too many bad Animal House knock-off movies, goofs off, so he is sent to a group of boys for tutoring. They steal Springfield A and M's mascot, but his friends are caught and expelled. Homer invites them to live with him, but his family soon become angered by their new housemates, so Homer decides to try to help them get back into college.
#38 – 'Homer's Night Out'
Season 1 – Episode 10 (Episode 10 Overall)
Synopsis – Bart purchases a mini spy camera and manages to take a picture of Homer dancing with a belly dancer named Princess Kashmir at a co-worker's bachelor party. He gives copies of the picture to his friends, and eventually the picture starts to circulate around until eventually Marge sees it. She kicks Homer out of the house, but the next day explains that she is not upset about him dancing, but rather that Bart saw it. She demands that he take Bart and go apologize to Princess Kashmir.
#37 – 'Lisa The Iconoclast'
Season 7 – Episode 16 (Episode 144 Overall)
Synopsis – While doing research for an essay, Lisa finds a confession written by town founder Jebediah Springfield revealing that he was a murderous pirate named Hans Sprungfeld who never cared about the people of Springfield. Homer decides to help Lisa get the message out, but they are arrested by the town council.
#36 – 'A Star Is Burns'
Season 6 – Episode 18 (Episode 121 Overall)
Synopsis – Springfield adopts Marge's suggestion of a film festival, in which any of the townspeople can enter a short film. To help her judge, Jay Sherman comes from New York to stay at the Simpsons' house. Homer feels threatened by Jay, and so Marge puts him on the panel as well.
#35 – 'I Married Marge'
Season 3 – Episode 12 (Episode 47 Overall)
Synopsis – After worrying that she may be pregnant again, Marge and Homer drive to Dr. Hibbert's office. While anxiously waiting, Homer begins to tell Bart, Lisa, and Maggie about how he and Marge got married, and how he attempted to prove to Marge's sisters that he can provide for their upcoming child.
#34 – 'The Twisted World Of Marge Simpson'
Season 8 – Episode 11 (Episode 164 Overall)
Synopsis – Marge starts a new pretzel franchise after being voted out of the Springfield Investorettes for being too conservative. The Investorettes see this and strike back by getting a falafel van. Homer helps Marge with her business by asking Fat Tony for assistance. Fat Tony attempts to collect all of Marge's profit, but she refuses.
#33 – 'The Springfield Files'
Season 8 – Episode 10 (Episode 163 Overall)
Synopsis – Homer opts to walk home one night from Moe's Tavern. On his way he sees an eerie glowing creature. The next day Homer's story is printed in the local newspaper. FBI agents Mulder and Scully read the story and go to Springfield to investigate the X-file.
#32 – 'Secrets Of A Successful Marriage'
Season 5 – Episode 22 (Episode 103 Overall)
Synopsis – Tired of being called "slow," Homer signs up to teach a class on keeping a successful marriage at a learning annex. He is an unsuccessful teacher and finds that the only way he can keep the class interested is to tell racy secrets about Marge and their bedroom antics. Marge soon gets fed up with Homer telling their secrets and kicks him out.
#31 – 'Radio Bart'
Season 3 – Episode 13 (Episode 48 Overall)
Synopsis – When Bart's birthday party turns into a disaster, Bart uses an AM radio microphone Homer gave him to play pranks. He decides to throw a radio down an old well and tricks the town into thinking a little boy is stuck in it. At first he is successful, but he realizes that he left a "property of Bart Simpson" label on the radio and goes to retrieve it. Bart becomes trapped in the well himself and the town decides to leave him there.


text:
Time to
1 month ago
"IF YOU ARE WHAT YOU SHOULD BE, YOU WILL SET THE WHOLE WORLD ON FIRE." "LET THE TRUTH BE YOUR DELIGHT.... PROCLAIM IT..., BUT WITH A CERTAIN CONGENIALITY." ~ St. Catherine of Siena
~ St. Therese Lisieux
Did you hear that Dingy Harry and Princess Pelosi???

subset: commoncrawl


text:
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Endurance International Group
News »latest by relevance
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Platinum Member
257673 Followers
Source:Economic Times - Late last month, when Nasdaq-listed Endurance International Group announced the acquisition of the web business of Directi, it made Bhavin Turakhia, 34, and brother Divyank, 32, richer by over $100 million (about Rs 620 crore). For entrepreneurs so young and so successful
1.46 PM Feb 13th
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from various sectors including pharma, information and broadcasting, consumer affairs and IT. However, FIPB has rejected proposals from seven companies - Nitor Infotech, ECL Engineering Services, IPsoft Netherland BV, Filtrex Technologies, Endurance International Group Inc, Atlas Equifin and British
2.49 PM Oct 10th 2012
Platinum Member
257673 Followers
Source:Business Week - By Michael Amato on March 29, 2012 Endurance International Group Inc., the web hosting and online service provider acquired by Warburg Pincus LLC and GS Capital Partners last year, is seeking a $535 million term loan to refinance debt and fund future
11.13 AM Mar 30th 2012


text:
Watch this Author's files
Thank you very much!
In fact, when I wrote this script, I was not aiming at dual x-axis because usually I work on [0, 1] normalized x.
Great job...!
Thank you for writing this! A much much needed addition to the graphing capabilities of Matlab. A few comments in the event you ever think to revisit this code:
1. The legend entries are a little clunky because the are listed out of sequence.
2. If I understand the code correctly, it allows dual y axis, but doesn't have a dual x-axis.
thanks a lot, it is indeed very handy.
Comment only
Contact us


text:
I live in Riverside California, a centrally located city, near The Southern California beaches, mountains, and deserts. I enjoy shooting landscapes and wildlife, birds, mostly.
If you have any questions or are interested in purchasing any of the images you see please contact me at email@example.com (Please enter "betterphoto" in the subject line).
I hope you enjoy the site and check back often
Learn more with an online course here at BetterPhoto.com:


text:
'Cause sometimes you just need someone to talk to.
The Lesbian Gay Bi Trans Youth Line is a toll-free service provided by youth for youth. We're here to offer support, information and referrals specific to your concerns. We are here because we want to be there for you – to be part of your community. We may not have lived your experiences exactly, but we can probably relate. We too, are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, transsexual, two-spirit or queer.
No question is too silly, no problem too serious. We may not have all the answers, but we're here to listen and we'll do our best to help you find the resources you need. We are sex positive and non-judgemental. We're here to help youth who are 26 and under who live anywhere in Ontario.
Learn more about how we provide services.
What's New
- THE LGBT YOUTH LINE CELEBRATES 20 YEARS: Check out our official press release here and watch out for a variety of activities and events to celebrate this important milestone in our history!
- We've updated our chat service! We have phased out MSN Messenger. During service hours (Sunday-Friday 4:00-9:30) all you need to do to chat with us is click the chat icon on this page. It's the same sex-positive, anonymous, non-judgemental peer support as before - now more accessible! You don't need to add us to your message book, you don't need a special program, and you don't need to reveal your MSN name: just click and chat.
- We have a new Resources page. Join the fight against homophobia and transphobia with these new posters, postcards, guide and more!
View Our Simcoe Report Here


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10 Things about D. Light 1. Loves to eat cheeses with names she can't pronounce. 2. Thinks Ke$ha is adorable. 3. Had her first kiss at 17. 4. Once she had three dates in one day. 5. Once she didn't date anyone for an entire Saturn transit.... read more
Insights abound this morning -- thanks to the monthly Moon-Pallas union in Scorpio (8:01AM). Pallas super-strong not... read more »
Make a Plan! Are you ready to set a new course? Draw up a list of what you hope to accomplish as Mercury enters... read more »


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By Kim Taylor
Here's a trio of Spa-oriented delights that will help you relax, refresh and reboot when necessary. Sit back and groove.
Abe's Market is a source for all things eco-friendly, natural, organic, wholesome and beauty-oriented. The Karma Organic Nail Polish Remover in Lavender, for example, is completely devoid of toxic chemicals, and the bath salts are vegan and contain no artificial colors or fragrances. How relaxing is it to know that you don't have to worry about the ingredients in any of the products at http://www.abesmarket.com?
Kick back and sway to your favorite music with soft pink headphones. The folks at Coloud know that you want your headphones in color, whether blue, red, purple, pink or black — or choose your favorite graphic at http://www.Coloud.com. Superb sound quality keeps everything stress-free, and one size will fit all.
Blue is the new green: we need to conserve water. So use all-natural La Fresh Wipes in many different ways: oil-free face cleanser wipes, waterproof make-up remover, fragrance free facial wipes, purse-size eye and lip makeup remover wipes, body soother wipes, deodorant wipes, feminine hygiene wipes, hydrating lotion, sunscreen wipes, nail care, travel size packets, gift packages, combo packages and much more. The good news: there are no parabens, sulfates, GMOs, glycols, phthalates, PEGs, acetone, dyes, artificial fragrances or animal byproducts in any of the LA Fresh products. These wipes were tested on humans and they're 100% biodegradable; choose your favorites at http://www.lafreshgroup.com
The citrus smell of grapefruit is always fresh, youthful and uplifting – perfect for spring. And when grapefruit is combined with Kiehls high quality standards, the result is a solid product line. The liquid bath and shower gel is an invigorating way to start the day, and the hand and body lotion with aloe vera feels like soft spring in a bottle. Find these lovelies at http://www.kiehls.com and Neiman Marcus stores.


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There are some new rebates available. Remember to check the Rebate Calendar tab at the top our site for a list of current Mail in Rebates.
Ice Cream $4.00 MIR: Purchase (4) Haagen-Dazs, Eskimo Pie, Edy's or Skinny Cow products and get $4.00 back. Must purchase from July 6th-July 19th.
Scott Product Coupon Reward: Buy 2 different products get $2.00 coupon reward, 3 different products get $3.00 or 4 products and get $4.00. Must purchase from July 15th-July 31st. Scott products are on sale at Food Lion this week and there are $1.00 off coupons out there.
Thanks Heather!


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IGATE Reports Steady First Quarter; Profits Up 44%
FREMONT, Calif., April 11, 2013 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) -- iGATE Corporation (Nasdaq:IGTE), the first Business Outcomes driven integrated Technology and Operations (iTOPS) solutions provider, today announced its financial results for the first quarter ended March 31, 2013.
First Quarter Highlights
- Revenues for first quarter 2013 increased by 4% to $274.9 million from $263.3 million in the first quarter 2012.
- Net Income attributable to iGATE Corporation for first quarter 2013 increased by 44% to $34.8 million from $24.1 million in the first quarter 2012.
- Gross margin was 38.1 % for the first quarter 2013 compared to 40.2 % in the corresponding quarter in 2012.
- Diluted earnings per share of $0.34 GAAP; $0.51 non-GAAP as compared to $0.22 and $0.38 for the same period in 2012.
- Added ten new customers during the quarter; six of which are Fortune 1000 companies.
- The company ended the first quarter 2013 with 28,204 employees
- iGATE launched its inaugural iGATE CEO Golf Cup on January 12-13, 2013 in association with Forbes and the NYSE
Phaneesh Murthy, CEO, iGATE said, "I am pleased to see a steady start to the year. We have made significant investments in sales, marketing and branding in our markets. The pace at which we are adding quality new clients is satisfying."Sujit Sircar, CFO, iGATE said, "I am happy to see good earnings growth during the quarter. Our margins were a bit lower as a result of the visa related costs that we partially absorbed in the quarter." First Quarter Operating Results Results for the first quarter on a GAAP and non-GAAP basis are provided in the table below.
|Three months ended
|Three months ended
|Year over year increase/ (decrease)
|Net revenue ($Millions)
|Operating margin ($Millions)
|GAAP net income ($Millions)
|GAAP diluted EPS ($)
|Adjusted EBITDA ($Millions)
|Non-GAAP net income ($Millions)
|Non-GAAP diluted EPS ($)
- A leading Insurance carrier in the U.S listed in the Fortune 500 category chose iGATE as a third party administrator (TPA) of its claims operations. As part of this integrated technology and operations (iTOPS) deal, iGATE will be responsible for the customer's entire claims operations, IT applications and infrastructure and provide TPA services on its platform, where the client will pay on a per-policy-per-month model.
- iGATE has also been engaged by a global financial services provider in Europe to assist it in reducing its operating costs. As part of the engagement, iGATE will focus on simplifying this company's IT environment by consolidating multiple platforms at a global level and implementing newer technologies designed to reduce IT investments by the client and increase operational efficiency.
- A renowned luxury apparel and footwear company in North America that designs and sells upscale footwear and accessories internationally engaged iGATE to optimize the company's worldwide IT landscape. As part of the engagement, iGATE will provide integrated IT and business aligned services using proprietary platforms and cloud based solutions designed to make the IT environment scalable and IT costs variable.
- iGATE has also been selected by a leading food wholesaler in Europe to assist the company in achieving operational efficiency after a recent acquisition of a retailer. As part of this engagement, iGATE will focus on enterprise systems consolidation that includes separation and migration of several disparate systems into a unified system.
- A Fortune 500 company in the U.S. providing engineering and construction services for commercial and government clients globally, engaged iGATE to improve the company's operational efficiency and increase profitability by consolidation of IT applications. As part of the engagement, iGATE will integrate IT services and facilitate upgrading of IT platforms on a global delivery model.
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|: 877-407-8037
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Dungeons & Dragons MMO 'Neverwinter' launches its free 'Tyranny of Dragons' expansion, adding a new class, race, quests and plenty of dragons.
by Rob Keyes | 4 months ago
The free-to-play 'Dungeons and Dragons' MMO 'Neverwinter' is making the leap from PC to consoles with an Xbox One port. Meanwhile, PC players can look forward to a 'Tyranny of Dragons' themed expansion.
by Denny Connolly | 4 months ago
Free-to-play MMORPG 'Neverwinter' is receiving all-new content ahead of the game's 'Shadowmantle' expansion this Thursday. How will the Hunter Ranger Booster Pack help you?
by Samuel James Riley | 1 year ago
Players eager to try out the latest Dungeons & Dragons game can play the free-to-play MMO 'Neverwinter' at the end of the month.
by Rob Keyes | 1 year ago
Cryptic's free-to-play MMO 'Neverwinter' is entering its third closed beta weekend today and we have a thousand codes for you to jump in and try it out!
by Rob Keyes | 1 year ago
We jump in the first closed beta weekend for Cryptic Studios' free-to-play action MMORPG 'Neverwinter' based on Dungeons & Dragons.
by Rob Keyes | 1 year ago
Perfect World's new lineup of free-to-play MMOs were on display at E3 2012. 'Neverwinter' and 'RaiderZ' are both worth a look for avid MMO fans, for very different reasons.
by Andrew Dyce | 2 years ago
E3 2012 is over and we've gathered to reflect on the best of what was presented this year. Here are the nominees for Game Rant's E3 2012 Awards!
by Rob Keyes | 2 years ago
Amidst a bevy of rumors, Cryptic Studios has announced their new cooperative RPG Neverwinter. While not quite the full-fledged MMO many have been expecting, new Neverwinter can't be a bad thing, right?
by Rory Young | 4 years ago


text:
Tool Factory Training
Labs - Photo
Click to enlarge any photo.
#1, Video #2, Video
One of many Tool Factory catalogs.
Laura Cryer is one of the top
specialist in the UK for teaching students with disabilities. She came
from England to train!
Tool Factory's always has Vendor
Hosted Rooms. We're keeping good company.
Every show guide usually has
room listings. Tool Factory was listed on the right side of the page at
Hewlett Packard and Smart sponsored
computers and whiteboards at Tool Factory's lab at NSBA...a rare quite
moment in the lab.
Apple sponsored our lab at
METC. People were sitting on the floor!
Apple sponsored our labs at
ICE in Indiana
Every chair is always full.
Digital Camera Workshops are
the most popular.
Maryland educators are intent
on learning. Bob Keddell runs a pilot program for us in Maryland.
The Pennsylvania PETE conference
hasn't had an empty chair in 3 years. Thanks PETE!
Overflow seating in the back
of the room is always full. Get there early.
HP/Compaq sponsored us at the
Pennsylvania PETC conference.
Tool Factory puts a lot of
work into building manuals for teachers.
Laura Cryer uses her British
charm to dazzle the crowds.
Vendor hosted rooms are listed
in the show guide at NSBA.
Tool Factory's Special Education
A typical training lab.
METC is always a great show.
Everyone leaves with smiles.
Dell usually sponsors the TCEA
conference. Tool Factory sends the trainers.
Closing the Gap was a great
place to learn about special education.
St. Louis educators are intent
on learning about technology.
Tool Factory sponsors again!
George Ragsdale is a trainer
at TCEA.
Olympus helps us deliver digital
cameras at a training session in Tennessee.
Closing the Gap was great fun,
but a bit crowded! Paul Nuttall, Director of SEMERC and top UK specialist,
kept everyone laughing.
Toshiba has been a very supportive
sponsor for three years. Thanks Toshiba!
...now you know what we do
in between sessions!
Julian is a future trainer.
He's getting tips from trainer Stephen Brannan, on what to do in between
We really enjoyed our trip
to Tennessee with Olympus. Teachers had fun learning about digital cameras.
Here is Tool Factory's show
Paul Nuttal, the director of
SEMERC, visited from England to teach assistive technology.
Teachers are eager to learn
in Minnesota.
Baltimore teachers took a digital
camera workshop.
Teachers in Fort Worth, Texas
are happy about training.
Tool Factory is always a show
TCEA is always a success. Thanks
Rusty Sinclair and the whole crew in Austin!
Heather Chirtea is one of many
lead trainers. She is often a "Featured Speaker" or keynote.
We learned a lot about special
education teaching in Minnesota.
Happy teachers at the T
+ L conference!


text:
Author: Kevin Spiess
Editor: Howard Ha
Publish Date: Wednesday, November 4th, 2009
Originally Published on Neoseeker (http://www.neoseeker.com)
Article Link: http://www.neoseeker.com/Articles/Hardware/s/sapphire_hd5770/
Copyright Neo Era Media, Inc. - please do not redistribute or use for commercial purposes.
Today we will be looking at the Sapphire HD 5770. Selling for $175 USD (or $160 USD without the included Dirt 2 game), the HD 5770 is in an enviable position of being a next-gen, sub $200 USD video card, with Nvidia rumored to still be at
least a month away away from launching the latest they have been working on.
Like the HD 4770 before it, the HD 5770 only has a 128-bit memory interface, but is not hampered too much by this, thanks to the GDDR5 memory under the hood helping things move along. As our prior experiences with the HD 5770 have shown, it is certainly able to keep up with even the more recent demanding titles.
A 40nm design, the HD 5000 series brought in a number of attractive features to improve the Radeon feature-set. Probably the two most noteworthy for most are Eyefinity and DirectX 11 support. Eyefinity allows for up to three displays to be used with each HD 5000 series cards (before, two was the maximum per each), and it also allows for greater control over how these displays are used. If you like -- and have enough displays at your disposal -- you can connect up to 12 displays if you had four HD 5770's, either creating a meta-display, or using them as independent displays.
Let's take a closer look at the Sapphire HD 5770.
You can tell the HD 5770 is from the same series as the HD 5870 with just a glance. They both have a similar look to them; including the very recognizable orange-red air vents at the end of the card. The Sapphire HD 5770 follows ATI's reference design for the HD 5770.
Each generation, video cards have bigger and bigger, even while the manufacturing process of the silicon has been getting smaller and smaller. This mid-range HD 5770 video card is about the same length as a the high-end cards of 2 generations back (the 8800 GT or HD 3870), coming in at a length of about 8 inches, and has a double width cooler.
While the HD 5750 sports a cooler vaguely similar to the HD 4770, the HD 5770's cooler is the same as the one found on the HD 5870, but just build on a smaller scale. You have the same many-vaned fan running on the right end of the card, and a similar design of the copper base on top of the GPU. The HD 5770 makes use of significantly less metal than does the HD 5870 though; not as heat fins are needed here, or heat pipes. But like the HD 5870, the memory also has passive heat sinks on one side of the GDDR5.
The Sapphire HD 5770 requires on PCI-E power connector. You should be okay with a 450W PSU for this card.
Like the other HD 5770's we have seen, this one has no back-plate, and has two DVI ports, a HDMI port, and a DisplayPort (keep in mind though, you can only use a maximum of three displays with the card.)
The HD 5770 has a sizable horsepower advantage over the HD 5750, but it is still a long shot away from the HD 5870, featuring only half of the total amount of shader processors.
As said earlier, the main things to be aware of in the case of the HD 5770 is that it uses the smallest-going 40nm manufacturing process, is DirectX 11 capable, and enjoys the rest of the full feature set of the HD 5000 series, such as Eyefinity, improved tessellation, the UVD engine for HD video playback, OpenGL 3.2 support, a PCI Express 2.1 x16 bus interface, ATI Powerplay for reduced power usage, and ATI Stream acceleration technology.
Like all recent ATI cards, the HD 5770 is CrossFireX capable, so with the right motherboard, you can connect the HD 5770 with up to three other recent (HD 3000+ series) video cards.
The HD 5770 also has 10 SIMD banks, 40 texture units, 64 Z/Stencil ROPs, and 16 color ROP units, in addition to the following specifications:
Processing Cores
Core Clock
Shader Clock
Memory Clock (effective)
Memory Interface
448 bit
|512 bit
896 bit*
256 bit
|256 bit
|256 bit
|128 bit
|128 bit
|256 bit
Memory Type
Fabrication Process
* denotes cumulative effective efforts coming from 2 GPU's (i.e GTX 295: two GPUs with 240 cores equal 480)
Box and bundle
The Sapphire HD 5770 comes in red and black box with a sword-wielding chick on the front of the box, and an eye-catching sticker proclaiming Dirt 2 in the box.
Besides the coupon for the Dirt 2 racing game -- which will use some DirectX 11 features, and will be available for download in the first week of December, the Sapphire HD 5770 comes with the following stuff: a DVI(M)-VGA(F) adapter , a molex-to-PCI-E power adapter, a CrossFire bridge, a manual, and a drive CD.
Judging from experiences with past HD 5770's, we knew right where to start our overclocking adventures:at the end. While our last HD 5770 tested was able to run at the CCC max of 960 MHz, this time around, the card stumbled after a while running at this setting. It wasn't until we brought it down to 950 MHz that things smoothly, with the fan blowing at 100%. As for the memory, we were hesitant to push the chips over a 1300 MHz clock.
With a default clock of 850 for the core, and 1200 for the memory, this is a nice overclock reached with the Sapphire HD 5770.
Video cards used in the benchmarks include a Sapphire HD 5870 Vapour-X, a VisionTek HD 4870, a BFG GTX 295, and a LeadTek GTX 260 Extreme+ .
For the drivers, all the ATI cards used the Catalyst 9.10 drivers, and all the Nvidia cards used Forceware 190.17 drivers.
We have updated our benchmarks. Here are the new ones:
ARMA II: This battlefield simulator is a very demanding game, on both video cards and soldiers. We uesd the in-game bench, running at 1680x1050, with quality preference set to 'very high', everything else set to 'high', and AA on 'normal'.
Batman: Arkham Asylum: Gotham's Greatest Detective makes for a good benchmark. We used the in-game bench, running at 2560x1600, with the highest quality settings possible. We chose to only test without AA as there has been some controversy that AA is unnecessarily handicapped in this game for some video cards.
FTL_Blunderbuss: This is a demoscene demo by the group Fairlight, which came in second in competition in October 2009. It makes very heavy use of particles, and is a good GPU workout. We used FRAPS to measure the average framerates of a run through the program, running at 1680x1050, with 4xAA, and 'high' detail.
Resident Evil V: Capcom's latest zombie smasher has a great 'Fixed' in-game benchmark. We ran it at top quality at 2560x1600 in DX10 mode, with and without AA .
And here is our older benchmarks still used:
Bioshock: For this benchmark, all of the Detail settings were set to 'High'. All of the graphic option switches were set to 'On', with the exception of the following three settings: Vsync, Windowed mode, and Force Global Lighting. We used FRAPS to measure frame rate performance. The FRAPS run was 138 seconds, triggered from pulling the switch in the sub at game's beginning. The sub's dive involves many big models moving around, which should strain the GPUs and be a good measure of the game's engine.
Crysis: Warhead: Games don't get much more demanding than Crysis. We used the 'Gamer' pre-set level of details, which is the middle level setting out of 5 options. We ran the benchmark on the 'avalanche' map, using the FrameBuffer Crysis benchmarking tool, version 0.29, in DX10 mode.
Devil May Cry 4: This Capcom action game runs well on most systems; but at 'Super High' detail settings, even the fastest systems get taxed. This is built-in benchmark.
Enemy Territory: Quake Wars: We use this id FPS benchmark to test out higher resolutions. We used the highest possible detail settings. We tested the resolutions at 4x AA as well as at 8x AA. 16x AF was also used.
Far Cry 2: This open-world FPS is great looking game that really puts the strain on a gaming rig. We used the built-in benchmarking tool, and the overall 'Very High' quality setting was used.
Furmark: This intensive, synthetic benchmark models a ring of fur. We benched at 1680x1050.
Street Fighter IV: You have probably heard of this famous fighting game. It has 3D graphics, but generally does not require much GPU horsepower to run well. We used Capcom's stand-alone PC benchmarking tool for our tests, and ran everything at its highest possible settings, using 4xAA, and the 'Watercolor' setting.
Unreal Tournament 3: We tested the game using a fly-through of the vehicle capture-the-flag map 'Suspense.'ShangriLa (map) running for 90 seconds. Details were set to 'High', and a AF setting of 16x was used.
World In Conflict: We used the built-in benchmark of the demo version of this game. We ran the benchmark in DX9 rendering mode, with a 'High' level of quality. For the AA testing, we used a setting of 4x, and a setting of 16x for AF.
If you would like any further information about our benchmark settings, feel free to ask us in the forums.
Our first time using this demo shows that Blunderbuss, like many demos, doesn't take advantage of multiple GPUs. The HD 5770 beats out the two Nvidia options here, and comes in with about half the performance of the HD 5870, which makes sense here, as it has exactly half the shader processors.
The HD 4870 always seems to get overwhelmed at the max resolution -- yet the HD 5770 does not have this problem. It puts in some good numbers but comes in behind the GTX 260.
Like the HD 5870, the HD 5770 doesn't lose much ground in this title when the AA is engaged. The HD 5770's performance level comes in a step below the HD 4870's here, but doesn't do too badly.
Here in Far Cry 2, the GTX 260, HD 5770, and HD 4870 put in very similar numbers.
The HD 5770 beats out the two Nvidia cards here, but comes in well short of the HD 5870's level of performance.
The HD 5770 can keep up with the HD 4870 here, and has enough firepower to stay in the skies in H.A.W.X
The HD 5770 can keep up with things but lags a bit behind the HD 4870 and GTX 260 here.
While not exactly 'slow' by any means, again the HD 5770 is a step behind the upper-mid-range of the last generation.
The HD 5770 is able to keep up with the HD 4870 here, even beating it in one resolution, but Nvidia's GTX 260 puts in the better numbers here.
While Batman doesn't seem to be able to handle more than one GPU, the HD 5870 kills this game, while the HD 5770 does well to keep the game running over 50 fps with everything maxed out .
The HD 5770 does better than the HD 4870 at the lower resolutions here. But the GTX 260 gets a fairly big head start on them both.
Operating temperatures
Besides updating our gaming benchmarks, we've also updated our programs used to test operating temperatures and power usage. Our last program used just was stressing out the new generation of cards as it should, so we switched over to using the program OCCT for GPU strain testing.
Sapphire's Vapor-X cooler is tough to beat (a review of the HD 5870 Vapor-X is coming shortly), but the HD 5770 still keeps things running reasonably with only the stock cooler.
Power Usage
Sapphire recommends a 450W or better PSU to keep the HD 5770 running fine, and that seems like it will be fine to do the trick. For the amount of gaming performance it can produce, the load of 260W is pretty good.
Those of you somewhat new to video card reviews, might have been distressed to see that the HD 5770 came in last in many of our benchmarks. This was to be expected though: the video cards up against the HD 5770 were a tough bunch. While we had hoped that the HD 5770 would do better against the HD 4870 in more titles, nonetheless, the HD 5770 put in some reasonable numbers for a sub $200 video card, and would certainly not have much trouble beating many cards below the HD 4870 and GTX 260, such as the GTS 250 and HD 4770.
While the performance of the HD 5770 could be a bit more impressive, when you take into account that you are receiving a DX11 card that is ready for new, boundary-pushing games that'll be coming in 2010 and beyond, the Sapphire HD 5770 shines in a better light. While you could get better-bang-for-buck for some discounted models of last generation, we recommend that if you are looking to spend between $150-$200, you give the Sapphire HD 5770 some real consideration. And throwing some Dirt (2) sweetens the deal a bit more as well.
Please do not redistribute or use this article in whole, or in part, for commercial purposes.


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Immersion's Integrated Themes Integrates Tactile, Visual And Audio Into A Branded Mobile User Experience. (Photo: Business Wire)
While mobile communications and content can be highly personal, user experiences can feel lifeless, isolated and detached, with interactions reduced to unresponsive gestures on touchscreens. Immersion Corporation (Nasdaq:IMMR), the leading developer and licensor of touch feedback technology, today announced new build-time interface solutions for OEMs to enrich interactive mobile experiences: one enabling conveyance of physical presence, another bringing realism to the branded mobile user interface. The company will be demonstrating its new Tactile Presence and Integrated Themes solutions, along with other advances in tactile user experiences, February 25-28 in the App Planet Hall, Stand 8.1F49, at GSMA Mobile World Congress 2013 in Barcelona.
Immersion's Tactile Presence transmits haptic information between mobile devices, allowing users to feel one another's actions. (Photo: Business Wire)
Communicating Physical Presence
The Tactile Presence solution provides an API for mobile communication applications to call low-power haptics, also known as tactile effects. By creating and transmitting tactile information between two mobile devices, Tactile Presence adds a sense of physical presence to interactive mobile experiences. Users can feel the remote actions of another through the application of dynamic tactile effects that capture and communicate emotive information, creating meaningful telepresence. As a result, a child and parent can be more connected in a video chat by feeling each other draw and playfully interact in a shared tactile space; friends can inject more feeling into SMS and chat by using LOL and other emoticons that can be physically felt; interactive gaming is made more intuitive as players can actually sense remote partner actions; and loved ones who are miles apart can feel more connected as their fingers touch while they share a phone call.
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text:
Disney Rewards Visa Review
Disney Rewards® Visa® Card from Chase
Summary - The Disney Rewards® Visa� Card from Chase will appeal to those who spend quite a bit on Disney products, theme parks and resorts and wish to earn reward points and discounts. The key features of the Disney credit card are
- You earn 1 Disney Dream Reward Dollar for every $100 in net purchases
- Redeem rewards for most everything Disney, from Disney hotel stays and Theme Park tickets to Disney DVDs and toys
- Get 0% APR vacation financing for 6 months any time of year on select Disney vacation packages
- No Annual Fee
- 0% Intro APR for up to 12 months
- No Block-out Dates
- Visa® Platinum Benefits
Let's look at this card in greater detail.
Reward Formula - The Disney credit card allows you to earn one Disney Dream Reward Dollar(r) for every $100 you spend. With the Disney Rewards(r) Visa(r) Card from Chase, you can receive Travel Rewards on items such as theme park tickets, hotel stays, and cruises.
Fees and Rates - There is no annual fee for the Disney credit card. The apr is prime rate plus 5.99% or 10.99% and the average daily balance method (including new purchases) is used to calculate monthly balances. There is a 0% apr offer for 12 billing cycles for both purchases and balance transfer.
You will automatically receive this 0% APR for 6 months, for each qualifying Disney Rewards(r) Visa(r) Card purchase, provided that no payment on your account is past due at the time of purchase. This is valid for certain U.S. Theme Park ticket-inclusive Disney vacation packages (minimum one-night stay plus a Magic Your Way Base Ticket at Walt Disney World(r) Resort/two nights at Disneyland(r) Resort), all Disney Cruise Line(r) packages and Adventures By Disney packages of $101 up to a maximum $10,000 per transaction charged to Disney Rewards(r) Visa(r) Card prior to commencement of your vacation and booked by you or your travel agent through Walt Disney Travel Company or Disney Cruise Line(r).
Verdict - Those who visit Disney's theme parks and vacation resorts often should consider the Disney Rewards® Visa� Card from Chase as it allows you to earn Disney Dream Rewards Dollars, which can be used to redeem Disney rewards.
1. Disney, Chase launches new Disney Rewards Debit Card
|Disney Rewards® Visa® Card from Chase
|Reward Benefits
|Reward Formula
|Earn 1 Disney Dream Rewards Dollars for every $100 you spend
|Other Benefits
|Typical Platinum benefits
|Cost/Fees/Interest rates
|Introductory rate
|0% introductory APR on purchases and balance transfers for first 12 billing cycles
|Annual Fees
|No annual fee
|Purchase APR
|Prime Rate plus 5.99% or 10.99%
|Balance Transfer APR
|Prime Rate plus 5.99% or 10.99%
|Cash Advance APR
|Prime Rate plus 15.99%
|Min Finance Charge
|Grace Period
|20 days
|Balance Calculation Method
|Average Daily Balance (including new purchases).
|Balance Transfer Fee
|3%, min $5, max $75.00
|Cash Advance fee
|3% min $5.00
|Over-the-credit-limit fee
|Late Payment fee
$15.00 - up to and including $250
$39.00 - if balance is over $250


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This product can be found in: Greenhouses (All) | Lean to Greenhouse | Small Greenhouses | Wooden Greenhouses
Product code
Greenfingers FSC Fir Greenhouse
RRP: £99.99, Our Price: £59.99
|This is great for those who only have a small plot of land or dont need a full size greenhouse x28Check the sizes when you order but this one was ideal for usx29 We have used it for start off some cuttings from the garden and it also stores some small garden tools and feeds It recommends 2 people to set up but I managed this on my own without fuss and you only need screwdriver and a pair of pliersspanner to hold the screw on the four bolts at the base
|Great little greenhouse found it very easy to put together all I added was a better catch on doors also gave it an extra coat of protective paint very good value for money
|I am so pleased with this item my daughter is thrilled too I also bought one for her we love to grow our own flowers from seeds so this fir little greenhouse is just perfect for this I had a plastic one on a frame and that blew away in a gale thats why I chose this one
|I was looking for a small greenhouse to be placed on a narrow path down the side of my house for hardening off plants I looked at loads of options all of which were very expensive I decided on this option and was not disappointed It was very easy to put together did it on my own in less than 45 minutes and I will be sealing the polycarbon to ensure no leaks as suggested by a previous reviewer The size is great and I like to option to remove the shelves to allow for larger plants Just perfect on the depth to make the most of the small space I have available May well purchase a second one
|Cant fault price and delivery Easier to assemble than expected just what we needed for growing number of cacti
|Good Value great little green house it is already treated however I popped a coat of teak oil on top just to help However what I should have done was to use some clear sealant on the lid there is not much of an angle on it and water does sit on it and then into the plastic top and then causes condensation in the corragated plastic hoping the summer will get it fully dried out and then I can seal it better However it is doing a great job for my Chilli Yellow Peppers
|This is a sturdy little greenhouse, which was easy to assemble and looks good. The insructions could have been a bit clearer - which way round to put the back panel for instance which isn't immediately obvious. The designated screw holes on the lid were a little out on one side so I had to make my own but apart from that it assmpbled easily with no assistance. The only moan I have is that the shelves are not adjustable in height within the greenhouse - you have to take one out to get tall stuff in so miss out on a bit of storage space.
|Having spent some time reading all the previous reviews and deliberating on size, I finally ordered and quickly received my mini greenhouse. My experience has been a very positive one. I have never in my life done any DIY but as my husband is now ill I had a go. I was able to assemble it within an hour using only a manual screwdriver and the assistance of another pair of hands to steady the doors and roof while I hung them. I made a couple of silly mistakes through not checking the instruction diagrams thoroughly enough, like putting the back on the wrong way round with the hinges inside instead of out, but these were easily remedied. By placing the screws and bolts in the holes provided I was able to produce a finished item with well aligned doors and roof that open and close well. I am delighted with the look and quality. I intend to follow the advice of previous reviewers and put a slug barrier across the bottom and wood preserve it twice a year. If like me you have been "umming and ahhing", it would seem that previous issues have now been addressed so GO FOR IT.
|Bought this greenhouse at Ł44.99, great value! Quiet easy to put together, the only problem was that water was collecting on the top lid when closed so I added some silicon around the edges to prevent any water damage.
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text:
Alex Sofa:
87" W x 32" D x 31" H
Delivery charge includes delivery to your home, placement of items, and removal of all packing materials. You will be contacted to schedule a delivery time. Please note that this item can not be delivered to Hawaii and Alaska.
Material: Kiln-dried hardwood, linen, cotton
Care: Spot clean
Brand: Hewson
This brand is available exclusively on Gilt. It was created in collaboration with our preferred brand partners to bring you great style at an accessible price point. Slash-through price based on price(s) of similar but not necessarily identical product.
Origin: United States


text:
PS Jailbreak
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text: I know this is not a mac problem I am asking about but I did not no where else to post. We are looking into buying a few iPads for staff here, but i need help on how to administer them remotely. I have found the iPhone configuration utility to preconfigure the devices but the other enterprise documentation Apple has is quite confusing. Any ideas?


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when is the new chapter gona be oUT!!?
Printable View
when is the new chapter gona be oUT!!?
Nobody knows I think. We just gotta wait, it has to come out one day.
Also she looked, aesthetically, like a carbon copy of Suzuka.
One more thing, I really don't like the fact that she tried making Yamato break up with Suzuka.
hmmmm, this chapter takin longer that usual......
i wudnt be suprised if it ends up to be the last chapter of the series......seing as suzuka and baka brain have made love together...they're prolly gonna end it with baka brain saying " i will always take care of u, and i'll winn all my races for u "
or some other corny line like tht.
They did look alike, but i thought Yui had a better personality and was less bitchy.Quote:
Also she looked, aesthetically, like a carbon copy of Suzuka.
I was hoping for it. >_>Quote:
One more thing, I really don't like the fact that she tried making Yamato break up with Suzuka.
Although, i still think Miki was the best. =/ too bad she got dumped somewhere else and forgotten...
As for the people who keep asking about when the next chapter is coming out, just be patient, although I guess I don't care as much since I haven't read the last few chapters.
This is where preferences jump in. I can't change your mind and you can't change mine. But whatever.Quote:
I was hoping for it. >_>
I think trying to stealing a boyfriend or girlfriend away from someone is a big no-no. It's just something you don't do, no matter if you are friends with the person or not.
I agree with bluejay on the last comment, but that doesn't really affect whether you liked Yui or not. We just saw her as a nicer and easier alternate to Suzuka at the time. I don't think anyone especially hated Yui until her last stint that got he kicked out of Yamato's life. Even then, theres still a lot of support for Yui.
hehe, haven't seen miki in a while. as for yui, pity her time was short in the manga, hopes get to see her more


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This is one of the best. This self-contained suite is perfect. The hosts are very friendly, knowledgeable and helpful. The location, the view, the lake, the hosts, all come together to make one of the best places we have ever stayed in. Even Mikey the cat is friendly. We truly did not want to leave. Although no breakfast is provided,... More
Location: Canada > British Columbia > Vancouver Island > Black Creek
Free High Speed Internet ( WiFi ) Free Parking
Ranked #2 of 3 B&Bs / Inns in Black Creek
Number of rooms: 21
- Also Known As:
- Lake House Waterfront Suite Black Creek, Canada - Vancouver Island


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You've maximized your blog site as well as lead generation getting web pages for conversions as well as your e-mail listing is fulled of clients- leads that have actually self-identified as having an interest in your firm as well as how you need to supply.
Several of them have not yet taken the surge.
Several of them could have an interest in your service or product, yet they may require a little push or tip. Which's fine, due to the fact that after you read this blog post, you'll have a toolbox of methods that can help route those introduce your sales channel as well as make them right into pleased clients.
Below are 5 reliable techniques you could utilize in your e-mail advertising projects to transform certified e-mail clients right into clients.
1. Follow-up with interested customers by sending out triggered e-mails
Your brand name is top-of-mind– and also you really want to keep that drive going when prospective customers communicate with your projects.
An excellent means to obtain this is with a triggered e-mail: an e-mail sent out immediately to a customer in case of a deserted cart, registration signup or other communication they have with your project.
These e-mails obtain your clients' interest considering that they're prompt as well as pertinent. Internet site getAmplify clarifies that caused e-mails have a click-through price 152 % above typical e-mails- along with 50 % greater open prices.
They could likewise have a major effect on conversions. Based on this Business Week post, caused e-mails are "in charge of hundreds of countless bucks in Amazon's yearly sales."
Use activated e-mails to follow-up with customers that deserted your check out or sign-up procedure.
One typical sort of triggered e-mail is the "deserted cart" e-mail sent when you beginning to look into or fill in a sign-up type yet do not finish the conversion. If a possibility has actually enrolled in your listing, or if you or else have their e-mail on documents, this is an ideal possibility to follow-up as well as posing exactly what failed.
Provide your possibility included direct exposure to your brand name by follow-up as well as referencing their current check out your web page.
Request consumer comments: did a technological glitch prevent them from transforming, or did they have inquiries that went unanswered on your getting or item web page?
If they need to choose they wish to finish it, consist of a crystal-clear CTA button that makes it simple for them to obtain back to the purchase.
Follow-up with potential customers who have already indicated some degree of interest can be a really low-hanging fruit. When SmileyCookie, online gourmet biscuit company based in Pittsburgh, started utilizing triggered e-mails, they managed to regain 29 % of the sales they would certainly have or else lost from abandoned carts.
When, not as well worn-out for a computerized procedure that simply requires to be established up.
2. Make your audience feel like a VIP with personalization.
Adding a personal touch to your emails is a great way to build rapport with them. In his publication The Six Principles of Influence, Robert Cialdini states that:
"We're more likely to be affected by people we such as. Likability is available in many forms– people may be acquainted or comparable to us, they might provide us compliments, or we could merely simply trust them.
Business that utilize sales agents outward the community utilize this principle with significant success. Individuals are most likely to buy from people like themselves, from friends, and from people they know and also respect."
It's no surprise then, that according to this article from MarketingLand, personalized email campaigns were "shown to lift transaction rates and revenue per e-mail six times above non-personalized emails."
The subject line of this Banana Republic email checks out, "For significant individuals simply, 50 % off."
They utilized e-mail division to send me e-mails promoting male items due to the fact that Banana Republic had actually recently posinged for my sex as well as age. When I obtained this e-mail, it made me assume, "I'm an individual which's severe! I really want that 50 % off!"
You can try this in different variations, but the overall idea is to make your subscribers feel like they're privy to a sneak preview or a secret sale.
If they like that they're getting from, folks are a lot more most likely to transform. Get personal with prospects.
3. Include a clear call to activity that makes folks want to click.
Every email you send to your subscribers need to have a clear goal.
Utilize a promo code? Whatever the activity, it requires to be quite evident to the client.
The clearer the CTA, the more probable it is that your customer will certainly be thrust additionally down your sales funnel.
Bonus tip:
Picking a clear CTA and also stopping isn't really sufficient. You likewise have to A/B examination.
A research study done by Content Verve revealed that a straightforward adjustment in an email's CTA copy brought about a 14.79 % rise in conversions.
Do your project e-mails have a CTA to motivate activity? Are you A/B examining them?
4. Connect your CTA to a specialized getting web page.
Having an amazing call to action is a terrific start, but if people click through and land on a web page that has nothing to do with what made them click, then you've wasted their time (and yours).
A dedicated landing page can help you follow up as well as deliver what you vowed.
Based on this infographic from Ion Interactive, Dell has actually developed over 1,000 getting web pages for their e-mail advertising and marketing as well as has actually viewed conversion improves as high as 300 % (!) when checking getting web pages versus web site web pages.
As it ought to be, the desired goal of this e-mail is clear. The marginal design accentuates the picture of the whitepaper as well as the eco-friendly CTA. In addition, the duplicate describes clearly just what you acquire as well as the advantages you'll obtain.
Okay, Marketing Land might utilize more powerful CTA duplicate, yet their committed getting web page verifies that you made a "excellent click.".
5. Offer a costs training course to your e-mail subscribers.
Regardless of what your objective, you consistently really want to over-deliver in value to your prospective customers.
Supplying an unique program or webinar to new customers serves this purpose, however it likewise does so far more:.
It gives a chance for you to develop on your own as an authority on a subject of your option.
It provides duplicated direct exposure to your company, increasing the likelihood of having them convert (one case study from IgnitionOne shows that the typical customer has five or more exposures to a brand before they convert).
It allows you to show even more of what you have to offer before requesting for a commitment at the end of the webinar or course.
It's a "softer" sell compared to some of the other tactics I've mentioned, it's still a great way to lay a structure for a long-term connection.
Match the color and also typefaces in the course material to the color and fonts on the registration web page. This produces a far better, a lot more constant customer encounter and also could aid to enhance your conversion price.
For optimal effect, examination as well as maximize everything.
Your email listing is an invaluable asset to your marketing; it enables you to obtain to recognize your customers totally as well as enables you to certify as well as support interested leads.
The simple fact that these customers have actually given you with their e-mail address currently indicates that they're at the very least partially interested in how you need to offer. Remain to supply worth and also you might discover that they relocate naturally down the sales channel.


text:
Which nursing program? NJCU, HCCC/Christ Hospital...
- 0Jan 18, '09 by kdrose01Hi,
I've been lurking on this board for awhile and have just joined. I'm a career changer and am finding this process overwhelming to say the least! I prefer to earn a BSN, since I plan to go onto grad school fairly soon. Also, from what I'm reading on this board and have heard from several other nurses is that more employers are seeking BSN prepared nurses. However, I'm also reading on this board that recent nursing graduates are having a difficult time finding employment (in NYC and North Jersey) after finishing school.
Between hearing about the difficulty of securing employment, and deciding which pre-reqs to take, since all the programs differ slightly in their requirements, I am absolutely overwhelmed!!!!!!!!
I'm looking at NYU (first choice, also most expensive), SUNY Downstate, NJCU, Christ Hospital School of Nursing/HCCC, and Thomas Jefferson University. I've also looked at Pace, but find their website so unhelpful and difficult to navigate. They also weren't especially friendly when I called.
Can anyone offer any info on any of these programs? Also, can you offer any info how you found a job after graduating?
- 0Feb 7, '09 by KellRrn2bHey,
I dont know much about the other programs but i know christ is really good. You are pretty much guarenteed clinicals because its built into your academic plan. . Right now I am taking a class there as a non-degree student and I love it. My professors are wonderful and the classes are small so u get the attention u need. I applied for aug 09 but i wont know if i got in until mar 15 wish me luck!


text:
Select () or exclude () categories to narrow your recipe search.
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"my boyfriend loved this. i added 1/4 cup of balsamic vinegar and 1 tsp minced garlic about 5 minutes before serving. sooooo good!"
"This was good. I tweaked it a bit by using 2 cups cooked brown rice, omitting the butter, cutting the milk to 2 cups and adding 1 tsp nutmeg and 1/2 tsp cinnamon. Cooking time was 15 minutes, stirring every 5 minutes. Delicious. I would have added 1/2 cup rasins but I didn't have them on hand. Something for next time!"


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Woodmere Lanes
948 Broadway
Woodmere NY, 11598
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