text:
For now I will say interesting and wait for future comments for my input!
by X-Man
My male friends and I were talking the other day about marriage. We don't talk about it the way women do, fantasizing and getting all excited about our wedding day. Instead, we talk about it like picking a career – you know you're going to be stuck with it, it can be enjoyable, but you had better tread lightly or it could end up in disaster.
I thought I'd share with women a few things that my friends said we did NOT want in a wife. Take it or leave it, but here's what most of us really do dislike:
1) A high-maintenance woman. It might be okay to be a little bit of a gold digger, but high maintenance means that nothing is ever good enough. You buy her something that costs $1,000 dollars, she barely says thank you. She might also be the kind of emotional black hole who is never satisfied or happy no matter what he says or does to make things better. That's draining for men, and flat out horrible.
2) A woman who is bad with kids. A woman's beauty is captured in her ability to nurture. The woman who says "I hate kids" is seen as less of a woman in the eyes of a lot of men. It also makes her look selfish.
3) A woman who doesn't support you. If a man is going through things, he wants to believe his woman has his back through thick and thin. You want to feel beautiful, he wants to feel like a king. If he's ridiculed or his dreams aren't supported, then he will probably gravitate toward the woman who helps boost his ego, listens to him and encourages him, just like his mother used to do.
4) A woman who emasculates you or doesn't respect gender roles: Feminism is nice, but a lot of hardcore feminists are either gay or single. You can have power in your household and still allow the man to be a man. If you're constantly ordering him around or not respecting his manhood, then he will feel that you don't need him. So, the strong, independent woman who "don't need no man" may lose her man because he is convinced that she "don't need him" just like she said.
5) Bad in the bedroom. If you ask a man what time it is, he's probably going to say, "It's sexx o'clock." Men are physical creatures, and good loving can make a man do pretty much whatever you want. But being frigid, disinterested, unenthusiastic or not concerned about his physical needs will make other women look that much more inviting. He definitely won't want to lock himself into a relationship with you, that's for sure. It would be miserable for him.
6) Doesn't get along with your family. No man wants to bring home a woman that his family hates; she becomes like a virus. Smile, be nice, be helpful, try to get along with everyone if you can and that makes him envision you as a regular visitor to his family gatherings. If you can't do that, then find another man with a better family.
7) Really mean and overly moody/b*tchy. Most of my friends hate women who don't smile or are always mad about everything. It sucks. A smiling woman who listens to his problems, tells him that he's special, has his back and drops it ferociously in the bedroom can get him hooked. You want to be that woman.
Take it or leave it, this is what we said. What you do with this information is entirely up to you.
For now I will say interesting and wait for future comments for my input!
This article is "PATHETIC"…..
Good for you Renee Aldridge for listening and not post so quick. We still have some focused black folks around here.
The Husband Should Work to Provide for the Physical Needs of the Family.
Many men leave their wives and children without the necessities of life because they quit their jobs for frivolous reasons or waste their income selfishly.
Genesis 3:17-19 — The man was required to labor despite hardships in order to have food. (Cf. 2 Thess. 3:10.)
1 Timothy 5:8 — As the head of the family (see next point), a man should provide, not just for himself, but for his whole household. The Bible gives many examples of men having occupations or businesses outside the home. Many Bible examples show men employed away from the home in such occupations as shepherd, carpenter, physician, fisherman, merchant, farmer, sailor, preacher, tentmaker, etc. (See also Eph. 5:28,29).
This is the God-given duty of the husband. No passage instructs the wife to do this. Man should not neglect his other responsibilities by over-emphasizing work. Yet one who neglects working, expecting his wife or other people to provide income for his family, is worse than an infidel.
The Husband Should Be the Head of the Family.
Some claim that man should not exercise authority over his wife or that his authority should be limited to just certain areas. In practice, women are often the leaders in making family decisions. But note:
Ephesians 5:22-24 — The husband is head of his wife as Christ is head of the church (see other verses below). Neither his wife nor their parents are the authority in his family (cf. Gen. 2:24).
Love will lead a husband to consider the needs and desires of the wife and children. He will make decisions for the good of the whole group, not just to please himself. This requires discussion at times to understand the views of others.
However, the husband does have the final authority, and will give account to God for his decisions. Often this responsibility is not a privilege but a burden. He needs the courage to stand for what he is convinced is best, even when the wife or children disagree.
If the wife fails to fulfill her duties, this does not justify the husband in failing to fulfill his duties (Romans 12:17-21; Luke 6:27-35).
Well spoken women take heed!
Yall take "HEED" this day…
Any self-respecting, strong, whole, wellrounded, spiritually-grounded, educated, intelligent, intellectual, financially stable, mentally strong rooted and ground blackwomen would even look your way for 1 second. Because these type of blackwomen are only attracted to strong blackmen of "INTEGRITY" like (MR CAMBIE)…
Blackmen like you couldn't even half-way park in my drive-way because I would immediately cuss your donkey-a$$es out or call the white police on your selfish selfcentered ignorant sexu@lly perverted egotistical militant educated-fool dumb-founded and don't know no better / because you don't wanna know any better.
To all blackwomen: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE / THESE ARE THE TYPE OF BLACKMEN WHO MAKE BABIES AND DON'T FATHER THEM BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOT REACHED A REAL BLACKMANS POTENTIAL OR BEING A REAL-MAN… THESE BLACKMEN ARE WHAT YOU CALL (whimps & woosies), still got mamas ******* in their d@mn mouth.
My sons have more integrity then all of you have in your little pinky finger. My daughters and nieces better not bring home a jigga like you cause auntie is going straight on her knees to God and yall a$$es got to go ASAP! / PASS GO & AND NEVER COME BACK..
Its blackmen like you who are the "MAIN SUBJECT / MAIN REASON" good blackwomen have gone and found beautiful lives inside the rainbow.
Let me tell you so-smart a$$ suckers a real fact, Blackwomen who have crossed over don't give a d@mn about blackmen anymore, and its nolonger an attitude of bitterness and anger because they are over you completely. People who are "HIGH OFF POSITIVE ENDORFINS" don't sitting around pouting and worrying about "THE BLACKMEN DON'T LOVE US ANYMORE"… Once most blackwomen cross over to the otherside they will never look back to the blackman ever again in life. Nobody's losing sleep but the blackmen.
Blackmen like "CAMBIE" will always be honored amongst blackwomen period because they are real blackmen of integrity, so keep pushing = keep walking cause we don't want none period.
You can have a PHD and all the d@mn wealth in the world that your money can buy and still be a d@mn no-good nut-cracker on the inside and behind closed doors / because if your not a "MAN AFTER GODS OWN HEART" and have no spiritual connection then you haven't even reached your "FULL POTENTIAL", in my book that equals *(your not a real strong man yet), so your not potentially good for no blackwomen or women of any other race.., The same goes for the women too.
Sorry to say blackman (MOST BLACKWOMEN GOT THE JUMP ON YALL TODAY) & and "JODY'S GOT YOU GIRL AND GONE"…WINK!!!
For some reason you have just been on my mind and in my spirit. You know" you don't necessarily have to be a man. You could be posting this article as a man and in all actualality be a women because of so much back-lash recieved from strong black-females behind N. Muhammads 2 articles posted "APOLOGY TO BLACKMEN & ACCOUNTABILITY".
So to me its like your trying to sneak-in through the back-door so to speak… coming in through a more subtle way. If this is the fact "YOU NEED TO STOP" and get polished.
Have any of you every stop to think that this "DIVIDE" that's going down between "BLACKMEN & BLACKWOMEN" has all been "ORCHESTRATED BY GOD"… meaning: God is the one who is in all actualality "TURNING AWAY THE (HEARTS OF (HIS) BLACKWOMEN) from the affections of the blackman because they have walked away from their (SEED).
Don't you realize there is a "LAW" under the Ten Commandments that come against the blackmans actions for casting his "SEED AWAY"..?
MATTHEW 18:1-6 The Greatest In The Kingdom
1.About that time the disciples came to "JESUS" and asked, "which of us is greatest in the kingdom in the kingdom of heaven?
2.Jesus called a "(SMALL CHILD)" over to him and put the (CHILD / CHILDREN / SEED) among them. 3.Then He /Jesus said, "I assure you, unless you turn from your sins and become as (LITTLE CHILDREN aka: not tainted), you will (NEVER) get into the kingdom of heaven.
4.Therefore, anyone who becomes as (HUMBLE) as this "LITTLE CHILD" is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5.And anyone who (WELCOMES A LITTLE CHILD) like this on my(JESUS) behalf is welcoming me/JESUS.
6. BUT IF ANYONE CAUSES ONE/1 OF THESE LITTLE ONES WHO TRUST IN ME TO LOSE FAITH, IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR THAT PERSON TO BE (thrown into the sea) WITH A (millstone) tied around around the neck.
Take your mouths off the single blackwomen / parents raising their children alone.. God has been watching and taking every note from the hearts of blackmen and blackwomen concerning his (BABIES / LITTLE CHILDREN). Yes blackman!! that blackwomen open her wound up to you.. and you could have been a strong responsible blackman of integrity like "ADAM" should have been in the garden of eve (ATTENTIVE) and (NOT) (PENETRAITED) the blackwomens wound. You should have been strong enough to guide her in a right decision instead of thinking about your dyck and how you were going to (SCORE) some pu$$y… just fkn jacking and drippin everywhere you wanted to lay your filthy head.
You say you wanna be the king of your castle!! then take all your sorry lame-brain-weak-donkey-a$$ to the "MOST HIGH GOD /AKA: YOUR CREATOR", fall down on your knees and "REPENT" for the destruction of your own "SEED" with the spirit of humbleness and humility unto God, because it is "HE / GOD" who can turn the hearts of "HIS BLACKWOMAN" back to the blackman. If blackmen refuse the call of obedience to God concerning the blackwoman then your lives shall become numberless / die-out through time and another generation will come forth out of the heaven through the womb of the blackwomen.
Note Blackman: It has already begun…!
I agree with somethings said but it's a two way streak. Its not all about the man in the issue of being married.
It seems the goal is set to satisfying the man and I didnt really here anything about him being pleasing, nice and loving as well.
Or how he should be the leader, strength, and head of the home.
Men can open there mouths allowing the words if she don't open her legs she will get married, But reality is that there are a lot of virgins out there and they are not married and have not found that husband.
I say both parties has a big play, everyone has roles and positions in a relationship. I say be yourself because there is someone for everyone out there. Remember If this man or woman doesn't like something about you someone else will.
God first and the rest will fall in place. God will send your Boaz.
Lastly, Ladies don't think your any better then the next women just because you say you haven't gave up the goodies. I'm married and yes I did have *** before but that was my choice.
And I'm married to my high school sweetheart. A man is going to be just that a man, and If he isn't married by the age of 35 he probably isn't planning on it. And it has nothing to do with the woman
Well said Kim. However, most black women I know will rather question the messenger than heed to the message. You seem like an exception sister, and for that I salute you!
I also agree with Kim. When you find a GOOD man and you take care and nurture his needs, there is nothing he won't do for you. This is coming from a woman that is divorced with two kids, and found the man of my dreams that not only loves me, he also loves my two children as his own (he doesn't have any yet). As a woman you don't know how much power you have in a relationship, good or bad. A woman's role is the neck to the head (her man); although underneath the head, without the neck the head doesn't move, and the neck tells the head which way to turn working together in harmony.
I would agree with you if you were talking about a God-man, because a God-man is the Good-Man, he flows with everything and God does not release him to a God-women / Good-women until both are a finished product. Most people in here posting don't even know what real unconditional love is.
A woman can have all of those qualities and it could still not be enough. I love to communicate verbally and physically but with certain that gets on their nerve. There are some good men out there as well as good women, however ……
I meant to say with certain MEN that gets on their nerves.
This really wasn't anything new that most women already didn't know. I'm in agreement with most with the exception of getting along with a man's family. She's not marrying your family, she's marrying you. LEAVE & CLEAVE!!!! Besides, his family may be crazy as ****!!!! We all know this! Individually, "everyone has their own issues" & their own opinions & their own ideas about any & everything. On a family level dealing with folks & their foolishness…AIN'T nobody got tome for all of that. Be cordial & keep it moving!
It doesn't matter how good you are at all these things if you are keeping score while doing them. Do I do these things on the list? **** yes,with a smile on my face because I love my man. No lie, I had to kiss many a frog before I doing I found mine, but that lead to being able to appreciate him even more. I knew what I wanted and what I didn't want. So did he. Plus I throw down in the kitchen, I'm about saving money and spending time! Lol!
Woman with a Ring
This was from a man's perspective. For all those women that are still not married, just listen and take notes. It wasn't meant for your critique.
Sharon made a reply and it was canceled. I agree with hers
Thanks Sharon – this article is informational, and not meant for a critique. We have Two ears and One mouth, so we should listen more than we speak. Not every man is marriage material, and neither is every woman-despite what many women may think. Listen and learn, if you have all the anwers already then good for you.
It doesn't matter most men don't know what they want. I didn't give up the goods and was cheated on because he had to have ***. I don't nag, I'm a very good listner, joke around, don't stalk his phone or where he is going. Because why waist my time if I don't trust him on his phone or to leave the house? I still have a hard tine. From my observations and it makes me angry. I see the ones who give up ***, get the man. Why wait when he can get it from the next woman. Not saying I'm a virgin. I chose to have *** and not going into details but very active in the bedroom. Still the same results. I'm not ugly attract many men. I could have been married when I was young and in college but I chose to wait because I wasn't ready. Now I'm ready and its not happening. I refuse to settle for less.
Timing is everything. You can do the right thing for the wrong person. Pay more attention to what we do and less to what we say. witholding *** is never the answer. If a man is used to getting it then you may want to continue that trend. There is a such thing as too soon but that may be a month. After that its time to deliver. That you have to earn it mentality went out the window with the resurrection of the side chick! Tread lightly my sista
What God has for me is for me….
And for the women who disagree this perhaps why you are not married or. Unhappy in ur marriage the problem is u dont listen to ur man wants besides he is the man of the house , ive bn with my hubby for 18 yrs very happy , four kids same man and im 34 weve never broken up ,its because im not ashame to say my hubby is the man and i treat him as such
What I surmised when I read this 'article:'
Dear Woman, Get back in the kitchen, take care of our kids and me. I'm a sensitive punk *** insecure negro who has no basis of reality today.
This keeps us in a very narrow minded view of gender roles and societal expectations, when we should be steadily evolving to create a better world. If anything I think we need to sit down with these men in effort to further explore where their ideals come from, this is no longer 1920.
And by the way 'feminism is nice' is so incredibly patronizing.
Sorry X-Man, I will leave it, until you grow up.
This is not a gender issue, it's a person issue. A respect for your partner.
I'm going out on a limb here, and guessing that you're single, right? Get used to that.
We need to ask ourselves why bw black are the least likely group of women to get married, out of all ethnic groups. Let's be honest, bw aren't exactly the most likeable or personable women. Quick to "throw shade" or "check a *****" or "tell it like it T-I-S", obesity problem and calling it "phat" when it's just "fat", jealousy and throwing shade at beautiful, slim black women, out of wedlock kids, then expecting some dude who isn't the father of their broods to come and rescue them from their ****** irresponsibility, and overall loud, combative, ignorant, combative behavior, or the ones who think a degree and a salary a couple of thousand dollars more than a man is making, thinking that qualifies them as a mate, talking about what they ain't gonna do, wearing those godawful hair hats (weaves)…sorry ladies, you aren't married because you are simply unappealing to decent black men. Which is why they're checking for the white women, latinas and other non black women. Clean up your act and maybe a good brother will "put a ring on it".
Devon your comment was HALARIOUS you have a great sense of humor you should be on stage. I've been proposed to FOUR times and married THREE! Unfortunately, my husband recently passed away and he was the BEST man I ever had. He was 17 years older and he loved his PYT. He thought the world to me and I likewise. Before we married I told him he would be the LAST man I'd married. I'd hope we both would live to be old but that did not happen. My husband not only left me financially stable but heartbroken because he was the love of my life and it took THREE husbands to get there and I don't think I'll EVER find that again and I'm not looking for it. I just want to see my husband again in heaven. When I nursed my husband when he got sick, changing his diapers, bathing him and watching him die. I don't ever want to got through that again with another husband. It is so painful to watch a love one die. My husband was so good to me and I likewise. I could become a NUN and it wouldn't matter. My husband left a mark that CANNOT be erased.
November 10, 2013 at 11:19 am
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I have never commented on this topic, as this issue has never impacted me personally, but I have an observation that I'd like to mention . Black women are loved, admired, adored and sought after in other countries, such as Spain, France, UK, Africa, and many others I haven't mentioned. It is only in America where men have the idea of looking down on a black woman. I think that has a lot to do with the history of black America, and the roles of the black man and the black woman. We can't change history, but we can change our future. I want black women to think outside of the box. Do not limit yourselves to black men. There are many other cultures who embrace our difference, and will go out of their way to make us happy and fulfill their role as a man. This is the observation of a woman who's fiancé is from Cameroon, and lives in London, but is going to relocate to America to be with his beautiful, black, educated, young lady. But in the meantime, I'm thrilled and waiting until Friday to catch my plane to London, to visit my African love! My point for the women is explore your options!
Most of the comments are so sad to hear. The guy was not ******* women, he was giving an opinion about marriage qualities and some women have bombed him right off the page. Unfortunately this seems to happen every time an article about Black relationship is printed. Some of these commentators need to throw out the mirror-mirror-on-the-wall!!
When does the brother tell the sister he will not marry her. Is it after he sleeps with her. Many of the comments here are sexist, racist and reflect a certain disrespect of black women.
I have been married to a sister for 17 years. I love my wife respect her and feel blessed to have her in my life. Unfortunately, too many successful black men have bought into the lie that there are no good black women out there. My wife and I fought to survive together early in our marriage. Money was very tight. I worked two jobs to make ends meet. Through luck and grace we have been able to pay off our school loans and now can buy whatever we want , within reason.
A woman is not a robot to satisfy every want and desire of a man. A man who is looking for a woman todo that will be disappointed. Marriage is a partnership. One hand washes the other.
The truth is that black women are doing better than black men. Many highly educated black woman cannot find a suitable mate because of the high incarceration rates, drug addiction and generally unsuitable black men out there. Black women may have to look to other races to find a suitable match.
The tone of this article bothers me. It sounds like the brothers are doing a woman a favor by marrying her. Black men need to grow up and smell the coffee. We need to support our children and stop trying to get as much *** as we can get before we die. There is more to life than ***. The truth is some of us act like we cannot survive without a woman. We are players but at the same time seem unable to face life on our own.
Mean spirited articles like this one serve no good purpose.
Many of the problems in the black family rest on the shoulders of us, black men.
Women of all races can be overweight,angry or just difficult to deal with.
Excellent commentary. I hope they listen to a man who has "been there, done that" and worked hard to make his marriage successful.
Y'know, Cosmo and similar magazines publish articles like this all the time, with mostly positive feedback. Which is why they continue to publish them. But try to tell a Black woman what a Black man is looking for, and they lose their minds. How is telling you what I'm looking for disrespectful to you? How is having the courage to express what I'm looking for in a mate somehow synonymous with being "an insecure punk ***", as one angry sister above put it. Hey ya'll like throw the Bible around, even as you ignore the parts that don't fit your agenda, so try this on: "cast not your pearls before swine" meaning don't waste wisdom on those determined to remain ignorant. Stay single, if you want. Spend your life shifting the blame on Black men, for your inability to maintain a relationship, if you want. Hey, shout down anybody who tries to express a dissenting opinion, why not? This is directed not so much at one particular woman as most of the responses above. Clearly, no one can tell you anything, but maybe, just maybe, the fact that 70% of Black women are unmarried has something to do with what Black women are doing, or failing to do. Or you can believe that all the rich brothers are with white women because they ain't man enough for you, if that makes you feel better. Whatever.
Thanks for your post it was so refreshing. And you are right I was married to a man who told me several times that he was doing me a favor and was trying to get all the a** he could get. He thought with the bad rap that black men get he was doing me a favor. Wow smh.
@Cambie, Brother to put it succinctly: you got blessed. It's important when one is as blessed as you to maintain both gratitude and humility. You are lecturing brothers as if what you have is readily available. What you have is rare. What you have is what I've been looking for since I allowed God into my life in 1999. Maybe you have been out of circulation too long to really be aware of how awful it is these days. My last misadventure was 2 1/2 years with a sister who was supposedly in recovery, supposedly on the same spiritual path I was on, but who turned out to be at best a compulsive liar, and at worst maybe an out and out sociopath. And she has lots of friends who agree with her that it's alright to be in someone's life for years taking all you can get, and then to start staying out all night, lying about it, and finally declaring "I don't have to tell you anything" Okay, well the punchline is I'm supposed to continue to hang in there for her, and when I chose to move on-I'm wrong. Yeah, I wish you many more years in what you have brother. But don't get it twisted: you got blessed. God did that for you. You don't have the experience to lecture those who have been in the trenches. But we'll keep fighting the good fight for you.
Speak! I was immediately disgusted by this article and felt like it took Black women back 50 years. If a man doesn't want a woman who is his equal than he isn't worth having. Someone needs to be a voice to let Black women know that they are enough just the way they are and perfect the way they were born. And that they don't have to try to look up to this tired sexist viewpoint of what it is to be a woman.
Thank you for taking the time to post your comment. It means a lot, coming from a brother. I wish you many more years of happy matrimony.
This made me laugh! Though I am now a widow, my husband was NOTHING like this nor was I like this fantasy "momma you can screw" that your friends describe. Dude, you need to get new friends because those guys are VERY emotionally immature, childish and insecure.
Grown men should NEVER in the same sentence, thought or in any other way reference a woman they are ******** with their MOMMA. Your woman is not your mother and should never be expected to treat you like she is. Do you know how silly that makes you sound?
And to keep referencing your need to have your ego constantly built up… that's just sad. That weakness of spirit is one chief reason men are so easily manipulated and not deemed trustworthy by black women. Though she loves you, she is not confident of your behavior and actions because your sense of self as a man is so shaky and fragile.
Lastly, since I've been single, married, widowed and single again, I can tell you that marriage is really NOT ALL THAT for women. Men benefit far more from it than women ever could unless dude is a big baller millionaire and she has nannies and maids.
Cooking, cleaning, taking care of his snot nosed brats from his baby mommas, listening to him whine about his problems, pumping him up all the time, meeting all his ****** needs while he thinks him marrying you means he is doing you a favor, expected to be grinning all the **** time like a fool no matter what you do or say to her, watching you sit on the couch after work and relax while she rushes around with kids and housework for hours = exhausted and resentful women that really don't see any benefit to being married to your butts.
Young single black men need to wake up. Yall are living a dream if you think all those foreign women are lining up to marry your spoiled behinds. And remember, for every black woman that has never been married, there is an equivalent number of black man that have never been married either. Check US Census reports and you'll see the %ages are neck and neck.
Black women may be the least married race of female, but black men are also the least married race of male!
Isn't that cute how that works? So people that want to throw that in women's faces like its something to be ashamed of need to check the mirror. Cause you talking about yourself.
A wife is not a servant, she is a partner and a blessing that you need to be grateful to have instead of acting like you are entitled. What you expect to get you need to be prepared to give and a lot more if you want to be respected as a husband, a father, and a leader in your communities.
It always astounds me when a topic is gender specific, in this case about how men feel, and someone always has to dilute it by saying that it applies to the other gender as well. We KNOW that by just once give a man his say.
Give the man a fair hearing and learn from what he is saying or disagree with it from HIS point of view.
It's funny that anytime someone brings up what MEN don't like you women go on the defensive saying that's not true!! How do you figure these aren't facts if WE keep running from you, breaking up with you, not marrying you, or flat out ignore you? That's why the majority of you will never get married or even asked to marry because you think you KNOW what we want and desire…. Oh my bad let me guess you are waiting on GOD to put your ideal man in front of you huh??!!! You all kill me with this!!!
What you missed Donny and Bobby is that WOMEN DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK OR WANT. No woman with good sense is trying to marry you. Run if you want to, nobody will chase you. Ignore us if you please, saves us from wasting our time with some spoiled male who has a false belief of his superiority.
At some point you guys have to realize that marrying you is NOT A PRIZE TO COMPETE FOR. The mentality projected in this piece indicates males that are selfish, immature, and silly. Marriage to such a man is a joke… nothing but slavery by another name for women.
With respect, my friend, I never offered an opinion on what he wrote one way or the other.
All I said was that if a man or a woman posts something about themselves, invariably someone comes along and dilutes it by saying that it applies to the other gender as well. As I said, we KNOW that but why can't people just stick to the topic at hand without digressing into other areas. It's akin to mothers taking credit on Father's Day conundrum.
As for what he says about what men think, he's entitled to his opinion and I don't think he's trying to appear superior at all. It is what he and his friends think that women should know. To not give him the room to think and say that is myopic in my view. Because one may not agree with what he says doesn't make him wrong. They're just his thoughts from his point of view.
I also think that no matter how strong a woman is, or says she is, she would want HER man to be as strong or stronger than she is in the context of their relationship. If that's not true, then she can be perfectly happy without such a relationship and the matter is moot. That's just my opinion
Thanks for responding…be blessed.
No Deborah, BLACK women don't care what we want. Or maybe that's just you. Nah, it's more than you, believe me. But your ideas about the weaknesses of Black men are kinda ridiculous. Of course your statement that marriage only benefits a woman if she marries a "big balla" pretty much sums up your mindset. But I'll waste a couple of seconds to point out that wanting praise from his woman is an integral part of male psychology. Not Black male, you understand, but all males. You might want to research that if you cared, but you actually used the term "big balla" so I don't expect too much. That you find all of this so worthy of scorn means you are the woman this article wasn't intended for. It was intended for those who do care. Since that (as you actually said) isn't you, why did you care enough to throw some negativity at this? And why should we care about your opinion?
Interesting article however if the single person does not also delight his/her self in the Lord he/she will not get the desires of his/her heart. Let the word of God be your guide as you wait on the Lord for your mate get to know Him, love Him, and His love for you will truly be the desire of your heart.
In many a Black male-female relationship, there is a third party – a White male. In other words, many of the values we prize in our relationships were handed-me-downs. I have obeserved that African marriages tend to remain strong and intact – and without many of the unreasonable expectations or aspirations from each other. Perhaps we should keep it simple by getting back to basics. Why, for example, DO I need a weave to impress a Black man. If I am always trying to Europeanize my hair or features, then am I not ALIENATING Black men, complicit – on a subliminal level – in keeping them distracted by a search for a "Black" woman who most approximates a White female in appearance? Why the need to "perform" in the bedroom or be so highly sexualized, to the exclusion of virtues that are more about GROWTH and developing oneself as a person, not presenting oneself as something to be selected like a product on a shelf or out of a catalog. I don't see much here about seeking SPIRITUAL compatibility, looking for INTELLECTUAL compatibility in a relationship or potential coupling. Personally, I am attracted to a man who is, at "first blush," warm and intellectually stimulating – a man I feel I can learn a thing or two from. He has to have a mind. For that reason, I have been attracted to a man who was a mathematician and one who was a doctoral candidate in comparative literature – in the former, I found a deep kindness & compassion and the latter an interesting and colorful appreciation for connectivity through stories, ancient, old and new, as well as a love for travel, and in both a appreciation for seeing in life the myriad connections in subtle and not-so-apparent ways. There is something to be said, also, for a man is highly intelligent, has a passion in life or certain intellectual gifts – he is less likely to bring a lot of shallow expectations, or drama into the relationship, less likely be abusive – either emotionally or physically. And I don't refer to men who are full of themselves because they have "a little education," or a title, but rather ones who TRULY appreciate knowledge, an incisive or sharp mind, and enjoy learning new things. While physical attractiveness, emotional maturity, and personability or the "absence of a bad attitude" have their place, possessing an intellectually stimulating mind, intellectual curiosity, or seeking opportunities to develop one's minds together should head the list, as with an intelligent and open mind, one will more likely to get it right on other fronts. This article does not especially set forth that this should be a component, or of concern to men or women, in relationships. There should be beauty/attractiveness in body AND mind. Start there first.
In many a Black male-female relationship, there is a third party – a White male. In other words, many of the values we prize in our relationships were handed-me-downs. I have obeserved that African marriages tend to remain strong and intact – and without many of the unreasonable expectations or aspirations from each other. Perhaps we should keep it simple by getting back to basics. Why, for example, DO I need a weave to impress a Black man. If I am always trying to Europeanize my hair or features, then am I not ALIENATING Black men, complicit – on a subliminal level – in keeping them distracted by a search for a "Black" woman who most approximates a White female in appearance? Why the need to "perform" in the bedroom or be so highly sexualized, to the exclusion of virtues that are more about GROWTH and developing oneself as a person, not presenting oneself as something to be selected like a product on a shelf or out of a catalog. I don't see much here about seeking SPIRITUAL compatibility, looking for INTELLECTUAL compatibility in a relationship or potential coupling. Personally, I am attracted to a man who is, at "first blush," warm and intellectually stimulating – a man I feel I can learn a thing or two from. He has to have a mind. For that reason, I have been attracted to a man who was a mathematician and one who was a doctoral candidate in comparative literature – in the former, I found a deep kindness & compassion and the latter an interesting and colorful appreciation for connectivity through stories, ancient, old and new, as well as a love for travel, and in both a appreciation for seeing in life the myriad connections in subtle and not-so-apparent ways. There is something to be said, also, for a man is highly intelligent, has a passion in life or certain intellectual gifts – he is less likely to bring a lot of shallow expectations, or drama into the relationship, less likely be abusive – either emotionally or physically. And I don't refer to men who are full of themselves because they have "a little education," or a title, but rather ones who TRULY appreciate knowledge, an incisive or sharp mind, and enjoy learning new things. While physical attractiveness, emotional maturity, and personability or the "absence of a bad attitude" have their place, possessing an intellectually stimulating mind, intellectual curiosity, or seeking opportunities to develop one's minds together should head the list, as with an intelligent and open mind, one will more likely to get it right on other fronts. This article does not especially set forth that this should be a component, or of concern to men or women, in relationships. There should be beauty/attractiveness in body AND mind, as well as spirit. Start there first.
Lynnea, your husband may be in jail or dodging the site of you. Often times, women will call the police after an argument have the man who's the father of their children arrested and walk around if they're clueless and even have the audacity the ask where are the men. If you are really interested in where are the men, I recommend first you check the jail.
It figures.. Instead of the women just taking heed of some general advice about what men want in their relationships the comments just turn bitter and condescending toward black men. It is truly sad to see how 400+ years of white supremacy and the resulting slave mentality has gripped us to the point that we can't have constructive conversations anymore without finger pointing. And you religious freaks are the worst, worshiping your blue eyed white jesus on Sundays and talking about how "black men ain't ****" the rest of the week. Well, I'm about to add #8 to the list and **** people off even more. #8 A lot of women need to push away from the table and learn to like salads and fruits. A fit body is more attractive than an obese one. No matter how "good" of a woman you think you are most men don't want women who are big enough to play in the NFL.
Ok I am very happily married 24 years and dated my ride or die 5 years prior to her making me the happiest man in the world with three adult children, college educated and a grand on the way. I believe I can safely say. Listen and take heed its simply insight! Keep in mind nothing is 100% perfect. My wife and I have argued, fussed and said we are getting divorced a 1000 times in 29 almost 30 years. Just got in a heated fight week before last about our kids. But she knows, loves and accepts me for the imperfect person that I am and I her. Once this is practiced and learned everything else falls into place.
What really weighs in the balance for us is are we willing or even able to sit down and be vulnerable, communicate true thoughts, feelings and then be willing to embrace one another's vulnerabilities, thoughts, needs and desires and live up to, sacrifice for, and simply "be" what your Husband, Wife or significant other wants, needs and desires.
If you can/will you'll probably on your way to living happily ever after and if you can't or won't you won't.
I do believe that when we respect each other as human beings and truly seek truthfulness, honesty, and most importantly vulnerability we can't help but find the happiness we seek. We all are seeking the same thing. When we listen/embrace what I refer to as toxic expert advice sometimes even from respected publications, images from media, talk shows, movies, tv and refuse to live out ones true lives, ultimately the behavior ends up similar to what is played out on TV and in media (We've got more divorces, separations of friends and family to prove it). Understand we live in an imperfect world and we are imperfect people.
Happiness is there you gotta work your *** off for it though! Nothing good comes easy… Just remember the fight I had two weeks ago. It only brought us closer. I Love That Woman!!!!
Peace At Lest!
A Loving Husband & Father
No offense to the other people that have commented AND MADE SENSE. But, I got to say that this Brother (Alex) has hit the nail so solidly on the head, that he drove it through the wood. In the words of my old Pastor, "What's love got to do with it. You fall in love, out of love, and if you hold out you'll fall back in love again." But something he said basically sums up Alex's position, and that is, "If you keep on fighting and keep on loving, your going to make it." It's going to take LOVE and COMMITMENT, for when one fails the other needs to be present until the both of you get back on track.
I am single and have never been married. After reading much of these responses, I see that this is still a subject that needes to be discussed in our community. I am especially concerned with the comments made by "Devon", which is the opinion of the media about Black Women, being fed to the black community.
It is wonderful that Men are discussing these issues and women are being informed.
I have taken the time in my singleness to love who I am, where I am. I have learned what I want in a relationship, what I will and will not tolerate and that I have to make the CHOICE. At this time, I have chosen to learn how to communicate, listen, and humble myself.
It takes loving yourself, knowing who you are and what you want. We have been taught to hate each other for so long, I think it's time to start treating US with the respect and love that we each deserve. STOP TEARING DOWN AND START BUILDING UP
What I have found out also is that men want a "good woman" some men do NOT know how to find one but they "really" want a "good woman". What I mean by a "good woman" is a woman who they can trust. What my husband saw in me was "compassion" he knew I was sincere about him. My husband was an older man and perhaps that was what he was looking for—someone who cared about him and wasn't out for what they could get from him.
Wow!!! Wheww.. i thought i'd never get to the bottom of the page Great! Article. I agree with the guys. The things stated we're on the Money! I've been Married for fifteen years (praise The Lord) and i show! (Not sure) lol remember saying i'm not married to your family, i don't care if i never saw any of them (sooo not true) because those family outings will arise, you will be required to attend, and you will go! so…. having a great relationship with your Extended family is MOST!!! important. I Adore my extended Family. But I could Not! even Phanthom the thought in this day and age of finding a husband. Oh wait.. yes i could beacuse I would Pray, and Allow God!!!! to send me a Godfearing, Wonderful Husabnd.
Marriage is NOT the prize single ladies.
After what I just got out of, It's going to take a miracle for me to care about what a man wants in a wife, girlfriend, hookup – I.do.not.care. A man can have all of that and not be willing to meet a woman halfway on her needs, just want to be appreciated for what he does and forget about what he doesn't or the myriad of times you've forgiven him, and have her turn into a lot of those things in response and in the end, lose her.
All I can say about #5 is if she wasn't like that from the beginning, you need to do some self examination to figure out what happened, because there's a chance that it's not just her. Stress and unresolved issues can kill anybody's *** drive.
I have no problem with giving credit where it's due, but I am not into ego stroking. Little kids need that and I'm not trying to be with a child. If you can live w/o having someone stroking your ego while you're single, why in the world do you suddenly need that when a woman comes into your life?
I'm a little confused. What are you guys giving back in return. The entire article sounds selfish. Its all about what's good for you? Satisfying your needs, sounds a little robotic, and controlling. What a joke… Nothing surprising here in this article. A man's point of view.
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No matter what you do or nit do,if a man wants to cheat,that's just what he's going to do. He can have the best woman at home that any man should be honored to have and will still find an excuse to be unfaithful. Then,he wonders why he's on his way to Divorce Court and/or wonder why he has drama.
One word fellas: Prenup
Two tears in a bucket. Not everyone wants to be married. I thought I did until I got into a committed relationship. Its really not that bad being single.
Just one qestion why women do not ask about marriage more than men
Eventhough I can agree with some things here…it all depends on what your position is in the situation. You also want to ask yourself some questions on how you are handling your relationship.
I was recommended to a website by a friend http://www.becomplete.net It has been an eye opener for me. I never would have thought how much control I could have over a relationship. I hope it helps anyone who it reading this. Good Luck!
"Men are physical creatures"
here is where i call b/s, there are men out there that want more then just looks and big ****.
if this is posted by a man: you do not speak for anyone but yourself and the few dumba** people you questioned for your little article!
if this was posted by a women (which i think is suggested in the opening): i feel sorry for you, i really do. it must be hard for someone to go through life looking at things the way you do…
what ever happened to, two ppl living together and working to better each other or just being together, because that's what make em happy. im not going to get into a debate here, mostly, because i don't care, really…
people get so hung up on stupid and petty sh*t, that alot of you have lost sight of what really matters!
you also make it sound like, if you through the pu**y on a man enough he will do what ever you want, we call these types of men, TOOLS!
…and really, come on now, who loves a tool or a push over.
but, really, please keep up the b/s, it's what drives me. laughing at how society is on a steady downward spiral, is what keeps me going…
Now, go back to shoveling ice cream down you're throat and wondering why good men don't want you!
and please, keep it LuLzY
I have never commented on this topic, as this issue has never impacted me personally, but I have an observation that I'd like to mention . Black women are loved, admired, adored and sought after in other countries, such as Spain, France, UK, Africa, and many others I haven't mentioned. It is only in America where men have the idea of looking down on a black woman. I think that has a lot to do with the history of black America, and the roles of the black man and the black woman. We can't change history, but we can change our future. I want black women to think outside of the box. Do not limit yourselves to black men. There are many other cultures who embrace our difference, and will go out of their way to make us happy and fulfill their role as a man. This is the observation of a woman who's fiancé is from Cameroon, and lives in London, but is going to relocate to America to be with his beautiful, black, educated, young lady. But in the meantime, I'm thrilled and waiting until Friday to catch my plane to London, to visit my African love! My point for the women is explore your options!
You are correct. The problem IS specifically with black women in America. Black women of other cultures simply don't act like the black women in America. They are more respectful, have less masculine energy, don't do annoying things like cover up their beautiful skin with stupid tattoos that make no sense.
My theory? Is that American black women were socially engineered this way by the dominant society for the sole purpose as destroying the black family. Black people are no longer needed or wanted in America. Slavery has ended and immigration will provide the necessary low wage population needed to work for the dominant society. If you drive a wedge between the man and woman of a race then not only are they easier to control, but they are easier to destroy.
No man wants to be with a woman who has been psychologically engineered to hate him. Even if it is a woman of his own race.
But to your point, if I hope to find a black woman to marry who will be more respectful to me than her "white daddy", I have come to the realization that I may have to leave this country to find her.
I was referring to black American women.
You must not have been exposed to much else. Maybe you should broaden your scope of social experience with a different caliber of people. You know what you see, and you speak of your observations. I grew up around successful educated intelligent women. I have my mother, great grandmother, and aunts to thank for the exposure. So I can talk with you about that. Get out of your comfort zone, open your eyes, and get to experiencing something different from what you're used to. To tell you the truth, all men who have sworn off the option of loving or being loved by a black woman, are at a lost. Good luck with that.
You must not have been exposed to much else. Maybe you should broaden your scope of social experience with a different caliber of people. You know what you see, and you speak of your observations. I grew up around successful educated intelligent women. I have my mother, great grandmother, and aunts to thank for the exposure. So I can talk with you about that. Get out of your comfort zone, open your eyes, and get to experiencing something different from what you're used to. To tell you the truth, all men who have sworn off the option of loving or being loved by a black woman, are at a lost. Good luck with that.
This means that to balance the budget, we'd have to raise taxes on this how to find and marry a rich man group
as well. The people showing this world, you can how to find and marry
a rich man jump on the platform. You know I've met so many people answer to themselves as being of a
particular type but they kind of select what they want or feel.
What about when you gave him all the love and he was running in the beginning? You tried to be nice to the family, but he spoke ill of you and had the family think badly of you. It's hard. It's been a long road. After I stepped back in my relationship, he started to finally see that I am someone special who can be all the things you all say you want in a woman. Just remember, men can kill a woman's *** drive when he makes her feel bad. Especially if she has tried everything to make him happy.
The only one I truly take issue with is number 2.
Some women (like me) truly ARE bad with kids. And sorry, but not all of us have a nurturing instinct. "Bad" can be interpreted a number of ways for a woman. Maybe she never wanted kids in the picture. While I recognize the chances of meeting a childless dude are remote –of any color–I'm not exactly interested in the role of stepmom. If the kids are older its much better for me, but I speak for me only
For myself, and not other black women. Past experience has taught me that ready-made families came with too much dramatics. Kids not liking you because you're not their mom, their mothers interfering in the relationship, and so on. It reached a point for me where I just stopped f******g with men who had children, period. The truth is I don't want kids. Ever. I made a deliberate decision not to have any and I recognize this doesn't sit well with many men. And yes, I accept that. Kids are a deal breaker like religion. If both parties aren't on the same page about children then this truly will raise serious problems, which is why I let men know from the get-go I am NOT a child person, I really dislike kids and babies, so don't expect me to coddle them. In the future, should you decide you want to enter fatherhood, I will respect your decision and move on, and I have done this. I'll only say this: if a woman tells you she is bad with kids believe it. This is preferable to you testing her theory she'll change her mind…which has happened to me more times than I can count. Do I expect a father to cast his children aside so he'll focus all of his attention on me? OF COURSE NOT. I'm saying don't expect me to accompany you and your genetic copies on your family outings.
I know this is harsh but there is a reason I have none of my own…I'm not interested in playing the role of "mother" to yours.
Black Men seem to not know what they want. I have been around Black Men that seemed intrigued by me because I wasn't like the other 'sisters'; I don't have tattoos, I listen to various genres of music (not just Rap and R&B), I use correct English most of the time when speaking (unless I'm joking with close friends), etc. However, eventually, they end up telling me how much they admire the 'sisters' that are half-naked in the club and go after them, leaving me confused.
Black Men say that they want a 'sister' that does not act 'ghetto' but in reality, that is what attracts these very men.
If a Black Man truly wants a respectful, educated 'sister' then he needs to wake up and recognize when he is in the presence of one. Otherwise, he will just be a "Baby Daddy" like most American Black Men.
I am a "Proud Blackwomen", whom today is grieved in spirit to admit, but "NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT" that (many) but *(not all) of my black sisters are involved in the "PRACTICE OF WITCHCRAFT" against many of my innocent black brothers and many of my innocent black sisters.
Isaiah 8:10
Take counsel together, and it shall come to naught; (SPEAK THE WORD), and it shall (not stand) for God is with us….
Many African americans are "AFRAID" to even speak-up or say the word "WITCHCRAFT" because they believe it is some kind of d@mn TABU, or they are use to walking in blindness cluelessness and the spirit of (FEAR)… but Redbone ain't afraid to bring it to the table because (I) like so many others have been a "VICTIM" of many vicious attacks by my own sisters within our own black communities and inside our black 4-wall institutional churches within the United States America.
The practice of witchcraft also cross the color-lines, but forget crossing the d@mn color-lines, today I'm talking about my own people who are embedded with so much hatred against each other from the heart that we as African American don't even realize that our hatred for one another is also a form of "WITCHCRAFT MENTALITY" against our ownselves.
I'm ashamed and ****** at many of my black sisters who work the craft behind closed doors in secret with other sisters… matter of fact I'm not going to even call you my sisters… because you are all so fkn evil and demented you don't even deserve to be called: "BLACKWOMAN", you name is: "DEMONIC COLORED WO-MAN" because as far as I'm concerned you have no "IDENTITY", because you have lost the "LIGHT" you were created to shine across humanity with, meaning you are now "SEPERATED FROM GOD", and you stick-out like a soar thumb with your "JEZEBEL SPIRIT"… you evil donkeya$$ bytches are the real definition of the word "RATCHET BYTCHES", so lets just keep it real from this day forward because its pass time for all of you to be exposed to open shame.
Because of your "GREED" to have a "BLACKMAN" in your life who will shower you with "MATERIALISTIC BLING AKA: money and everything else that comes along with it that is not even pleasing to your creator because of the evil trickery low-down dirty ways you attained it in the first place, you have stooped so low as to "CAST SPELLS" that:
Turn the affections of a married blackman against his wife and children…
Dress your ****** with a wicked substance to get a blackman…
Put one of your ****** monthly kotex or tampons in a meal specially prepared for our good blackmen of integrity because you dirty bytches really do know how to spot them out in a crowd zoom-in and pick them…. Bam! Bam! Bam! most brothers don't even realize they have been hit because that is what the curse is designed to do.
Dress yourself with a wicked substance to draw him in for the kill all for the purpose of money and finances.
Use your own filthy urine…
You "Spike or Micki" other peoples drinks, you work your evil donkeya$$ wicked spells everywhere you go because you are a "THIEVING BUNCH OF ADDICTED CONTROL FREAKS" who's main purpose is to "KILL STEAL and DESTROY" the black community.
You constantly attack "GOD'S ANOINTED PEOPLE" because you are power-hungry wicked sin-sick double-dealing demons.
Many of you are caught up into homosexuality and orgys for the purpose of satanic rituals and secred alters of sacrifice.
You go into your own black sisters house and plant wicked substance to cause the spirit of kaos in her household due to your low-self-esteem and the spirit of "JEALOUSY & COVETNESS…
You will even stoop so low as to cause your own sister to miscarriage baby, lose her employment, murder, dress her man to make her physically sick when they have ******-intercourse…
You astro-project into other peoples personal space wee hours of the morning during the bewitching hours. You operate in many gifts that you use the opposite of God, even stepping into someone elses dreamscape for the purpose destruction and murder. The reason you get away with it is because you can't prove witchcraft in a court of Law because it is of the unseen world and most blackfolk are clueless and lost because they walk in "LACK OF KNOWLEDGE" and they don't really believe in God like they protest they do so that leaves them vulnerable 24-7.
Your purchase insurance policys on blackmen, find their weak spots dealing with their health conditions then you go in for the kill like a **** black widow-spider, then you collect on the insurance policy kick back until you stalk your next victim…. and to all my "SHALLOW MINDED" black brothers who really think its all just about $ex… you don't always know who the fk your donkey's are sleeping with, this is one of the reasons why God created Laws under the "TEN COMMANDMENTS", and so it is for the blackwomen also to sustain herself from $exual intercourse outside of marriage. The wages of sin is death, it is the "LAW" of the spirit of God… break it and we become unbalance in nature due to disobedience against our creator and designer.
Let me put you on notice: There are some blackmen out there who also practice the craft also. But right now I'm addressing you evil demented a$$ colored women who believe your a$$es are so fkn hidden that God won't expose your dumb-a$$. Let me hip you dirty bytches to something: Ain't one d@mn thing on the face of this earth hidden to those of us who are called anointed and appointed who walk in the spirit of the living God, and don't wobble in our fleshly nature. God said your time is up and the "EXIT DOOR" is upon you as we speak.
Tough Love aka: Unconditional Love / Redbone


text:
Here's what happened.
Twenty minutes into PSYC 210 (Statistics in the Behavioral Sciences), while navigating through my sleep walking fogginess, I began lecturing on the importance of calculating an effect size (namely, Cohen's d) if an inferential test yielded a statistically significant result. Among other examples, we discussed evolved sex differences with large effect sizes, such as hand grip strength and the desire for casual sex. All was going well.

subset: commoncrawl


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Bass TabsBass Tabs v2ChordsChords v2Chords v3Chords v4TabsTabs v2Ukulele
chords version2 BACK HOME BY Yellowcard Intro: Bm-D-G 2X D Don't know A G What I was looking for when I went home D I found me alone A Sometimes G D I need someone to say, "You'll be alright!" A "What's on your mind?" A G But the water's shallow here A And I am full of fear G And empty-handed after two long years Chorus: D G Another sunny day in California D G I'm sure back home they'd love to see it D G But they don't know that what you love is ripped away A G Before you get a chance to feel it Chord pattern: (same as first stanza) Back home I always thought I wanted so much more Now I'm not too sure `Cause sometimes I miss knowing someone's there for me And feeling free Chord Pattern: A-G 2X Free to stand beside The ocean in moonlight And light myself a smoke beneath The dark Atlantic sky Bm-A-G 4X Everybody here is living life in fear of falling out of line Tearing lives apart, breaking lots of hearts just to pass the time And the eyes get red in the back of your head This place will make you blind Put it all behind me and I'll be just fine. chord pattern:D-G (3x) A-G Another sunny day beneath this cloudless sky Sometimes I wish that it would rain here And wash away the West Coast dreaming from my eyes There's nothing real for them to see here Another sunny day in California I'm sure back home they'd love to see it But they don't know that what you love is ripped away Before you get a chance to feel it salamat sa bicolandia at kay Donald hehehe!
Popular Yellowcard tabs & chords
Song lyrics
↑ Back to top | Tablatures and chords are parodies/interpretations of the original songs. You may use it for private study, scholarship, research or language learning purposes only


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The Future of 3D Printing
Why stop at 3D printing your face or a small representation of a building... why not 3D print an entire house.
Why stop at 3D printing your face or a small representation of a building... why not 3D print an entire house.
With the year wrapping up I have looked back to see what was the most popular topics on this blog for 2011. Counting down to #1 we have:
10. Good to Great – "First Who… Then What"
Do you have the "right" people to fuel your implementation and innovation? If you have not asked this question then your efforts, desires and passions may not be able to be fulfilled. The "right" people are your most important assets, not just people.
This post was one of my fastest idea to generation topics of all time. It all came together between the train station and my office at the time. I would have to walk past the Occupy Boston protesters and a whole bunch of ideas flooded my mind.
This post outlined how just about everyone is doing the "BIM" thing. How does one measure one firm against another? How many answers would you get if you were surveying what the definition of BIM is? What will be after BIM, will it be more defined or will it be as general as CAD is? It is not that you own the tool, it is how you use it. Are you a rough framer or a master carpenter?
7. "Super Revit Families" - Are They Good?
Is it best to use a lot of static or slightly parametric families or a couple "Super" families that can adapt to numerous needs.
6. Revit Copy From Project to Family #Fail
Always a point of contention, you want to layout something in a project and use that within a family but that is not the intended workflow.
Basic premise is why render something one does not see.
Stairs are always difficult within Revit but this family which was adapted from my Autodesk University 2010 fun during the Fuzzy Math session helps schematically layout your stair needs.
3. Revit For Presentations - Graphics That "POP"
This year's Autodesk University 2011 has alrady made the top of the charts for hits. Graphics are an important part to relaying information.
2. Autodesk Showcase or Galileo, For Architects?
A continuing struggle for many is how to present the model to a client and unfortunately there is not one solution that matches the needs, in my opinion.
1. Sheet Creator App for Revit
I am surprised that this little app that I created for Autodesk University 2009 still gets so much interest. You may have noticed that I had the 2012 version in the download area but never really announced it. http://jasongrant.squarespace.com/document-download-area/ If you have issues with the app not running it is a security issue and it can be resolved by following the instructions here: http://revitoped.blogspot.com/2011/07/unblock-your-app.html
So what does 2012 hold? Not much Revit but a lot of interesting technologies, trends and business thinking. Are you happy with your current processes, workflow and abilities within the available software? If you are or are not but want to help provide feedback on the next generation of software. Sign up to be part of our feedback community at: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/LiveBuildingsAEC-FeedbackCommunity
Video was not available the first day that Autodesk University announced but it seems like all has been resolved and it can be shared with the community of users.
Thanks to everyone who filled out the surveys. David and I beat the average rating for every category and we enjoyed hearing what you thought in the comments. Also, thanks to the bloggers spreading the word and showing an interest in what we presented. Revitdialog, What Revit Wants, Shades of Grey, Revit Sticky Notes and probably others I am missing.
There have been a few questions since the session and I thought others might benefit from the responses:
QUESTION: Why did you use BASIC ROOF to model the parcels and roads? Can an In-Place Mass be used instead?
ANSWER: There are a couple reasons to use basic roofs after one has modeled the site using a conceptual mass. The first reason for me is that one can model the sloped site and then the roof elements applied to the mass can be raised or lowered a specific elevation. This helps show curbs and road depressions better. The second reason is that less information needs to be entered in the roof compared to a conceptual or in-place mass to control through material assignments and filters. Usually, in-place masses are mostly instance driven and the larger the project the more one would have wished they could have used type parameters. The final reason is that I found it easier to schedule roof elements for things like green space, impervious surface and other site requirements.
QUESTION: I have been reviewing the content for use in some Urban Planning work by our planners and I have a question about the below graphic which is not part of any of the datasets. Were these all in Revit? The bottom one looks like a rendering while the left one looks like Revit with some transparency added. The left one is very pleasing with a kind of sketchy feeling. Is it two view composited, one with linework only and another with shading or real colors?
ANSWER: You are correct that the bottom image is the only one in the entire presentation that was rendered. The left image that you are refering to is just one image with the obstructing buildings being ghosted. I appologize for the file not being in the dataset but here is a link to it: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/Revit%20Graphics%20Popular%20Colors.zip
OTHER QUESTIONS: If I missed an email or comment please let me know and I will get back to you.
Other materials can be found here:
Handout - http://www.box.com/s/ai4gm0bhzxc7ify5yax0
Powerpoint - http://www.box.com/s/uhpcami65z24kjcpxpe0
Dataset - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Dataset.zip
Handout (Mirror Site) - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Handout.zip
Powerpoint (Mirror Site) - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Presentation.zip
If you want to help provide feedback on the next generation of software. Sign up to be part of our feedback community at: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/LiveBuildingsAEC-FeedbackCommunity
As you probably know, I joined DS Solidworks to work on their AEC product development which is known as Live Buildings. Having recently been in the AEC field myself, I understand how the process of developing projects from inception through completion is done. I also know that each firm and company is different and there are many ways to do similar tasks with even more ways of producing the deliverables. Different needs from software are required based on project type, project size, services delivered, regional requirements and many other variables.
I want to offer a unique opportunity to everyone in the industry. This opportunity is to help shape software through your feedback. Typically, software is developed, sold and then you may be asked for feedback on how to alter what has already been created to better align with your process. Those who developed the software are invested in what they spent time creating and many times the tools are difficult to change. I would rather help provide the industry with actual solutions based on your needs before it is difficult to change.
That is where your feedback is important. Without it, we would create solutions for a few rather than the masses. When you sign-up for our Feedback Community you will be able to help influence decisions on development through your responses. I look forward to collaborating with you.
You can sign-up here: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/LiveBuildingsAEC-FeedbackCommunity
Also follow us on Twitter @LiveBuildings and Linkedin
Last week I presented at Autodesk University for possibly my last time due to my new position. Even though it might be the last for me, David Light and I brought our "A" game and knocked it out of the park. With our passion for graphics and the role graphics should have in the architectural process, we split up the session into two parts. The first part was David Light showing what Revit can do OOTB (Marketed Processes) and what everyone should be doing at a minimum along with some tips and tricks.
With that as a base, the second part was on my research over the last year on presentation graphics that can be seen on the daily postings on the Archdaily website. I kept a feed and would grab each image that I deemed as an intriguing graphic.
From that research, I determined that the current graphics used in presentations included life/feeling while at the same time having simplicity/focus. From this research, I explored ways of adding life and feeling through new custom built content within Revit. At the same time, I struggled with how to add the simplicity and focus within the limitations of the visibility graphics controls and that led me to filters which have an immense amount of control ability. My hope was that this research and testing would reduce the need to go to multiple other software packages to get a graphical "feel" because it was believed that it could not be done within Revit. The more software packages used for one portion of the process greatly increases the disconnect and rework in each package while reducing the time you can spend designing since all the time is spent coordinating software.
While you wait for the recording to be published by Autodesk University, grab our presentation, handout and the dataset which includes numerous examples of entourage, analysis, annotation, site and other content as well as hours of fun deconstructing the settings to work them into your office's best practices. Enjoy and let me know what you think…
Handout - http://www.box.com/s/ai4gm0bhzxc7ify5yax0
Powerpoint - http://www.box.com/s/uhpcami65z24kjcpxpe0
Dataset - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Dataset.zip
I hit the monthly bandwidth limit for box.net so back to my tried and true dropbox hosting. Here are the new links if you are getting the bandwidth error.
Handout - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Handout.zip
Powerpoint - http://dl.dropbox.com/u/6543805/AB4564-Presentation.zip


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Draft House
© Steve Wallington
Time Out rating:
Not yet rated
Time Out says
Posted: Mon Oct 31 2011
One of a five-strong chain, this buzzing boozer on a modest corner plot throbs with a good-time vibe. The dedicated dining area at the back fills up steadily over an evening, seemingly as carousers from the front bar decide that solid sustenance may be necessary given their advancing state of marination.
True to its name, the Draft House puts beer centre stage, taking provenance, cellaring and pouring seriously. The brews are indeed impressive, and the option of one-third pint measures reinforces the spirit of discovery. If only the same care were taken with the food. Staples include haddock and chips, salmon and crab cakes, and an 8oz burger (the menu recommends beer matches). Yet in the instances where ambition crept in, we found the results disappointing.
A starter of squid, chorizo and caper berries was eye-wateringly hot, and a little sweet, while ham hock and cheddar croquettes came with an unpleasant glutinous mustard-based dip. Both dishes were served at nuclear temperatures. Food felt perfunctory, service was misjudged, and at times the commercialism was transparent: a £16.50 ribeye was served with only a garnish – a portion of chips or fries cost extra. Ouch!
ReviewsAdd +
Venue details
Draft House 94 Northcote Road
- Venue phone:
020 7924 1814
- Venue website:
- Opening hours:
Open noon-11pm Mon-Fri; 10am-11pm Sat; 10am-10.30pm Sun. Meals served noon-10pm Mon-Sat; 10am-9pm Sun
- Transport:
Clapham Junction rail
- Price:
Main courses £5.75-£16.50
Draft House
- 94 Northcote Road
- 020 7924 1814
- www.drafthouse.co.uk
- 51.457434,-0.165918
- 94 Northcote Road
- Draft House


text:
How to Create a Digital Signature Using MyLiveSignature.com
August 29, 2010 by Debbie Turner
Filed under Internet Marketing 101, Internet Marketing Tips
How much more warm and professional do you think your emails and blog posts can feel and look if you have a handwritten looking signature rather than a typed one?
Well, I'm of the opinion in internet marketing and forging personal and business relationships with prospects, leads and customers, it's an added step of good measure.
Creating a digital signature is easy to create using www.MyLiveSignature.com. Below in this video, I have taken you step by step showing you exactly how you can set up your own signature with hundreds of variations.
I know some people prefer to write out their name, take a picture of it, scan it into their computer and use their "real and actual" signature. However, with all the identify theft going on, why put your John Hancock out there for the world to see? MyLiveSignature provides a much better alternative.
Enjoy the video!
To be even "snazier (if that's a word), watch this video on How To Use Wisestamp? – (Ninja Trick for Lookin' Good!)
If you enjoyed this video, please leave a comment, retweet it and share it with your Facebook friends! Thanks a million!
Debbie Turner
PS: CLICK HERE to Discover How to Create Wealth
Even If Nobody Joins Your business.
PSS: CLICK HERE to Discover How a Team of Top
Internet Marketers Sponsored 150 Reps In 1 Hour


text:
Jocktails at the 500
Grey Goose Vodka hosted the first annual "Jocktails at the 500" Celebrity Bartending Charity Event with the J Wagner Group and Fresh Marketing on May 26 at Hyde Lounge at Blu in Indianapolis.
Proceeds benefited Racing for Cancer.
photos by Shahrzad Javid | contributing photographer
Click here to purchase photos.
Category: Weekly


text:
'Mad Money Lightning Round': Wal-Mart's a Winner
To see the full "Mad Money" Recap, please
Here's what Jim Cramer had to say about some of the stocks that callers offered up during the "Mad Money Lightning Round" Friday evening:
Wal-Mart (WMT): "Wal-Mart was downgraded today. That is wrong. I think Wal-Mart is a winner, that's a good call."Peabody Energy (BTU): "There is a battle between the longs and the shorts on this one, I like natural gas better. I like Apache (APA), Anadarko Petroleum (APC) and Chesapeake Energy (CHK) more." Procter & Gamble (PG): "P&G is in bull-market mode. They are committed to the dividend and have a great balance sheet ... a high quality name." Core Labs (CLB): "When oil's is at $110 a barrel, you hire Core Labs to help you get more oil out of your wells. I'm behind Core Labs." Allergan (AGN): "I have been amazed this stock is acting so badly. People fear these stocks, but that is wrong. I want to be a buyer." Philippine Long Distance (PHI): "I was debating this one, I should revisit it. " United Parcel Service (UPS): "UPS is one of the best run companies in America. I don't think it'll make any money right now." *For all you home-gamers, a 'mon-back opportunity means Cramer would back up the figurative truck and load up on a stock. Want more Cramer? Check out Jim's rules and commandments for investing by clicking here.
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Kerouac / The Long Haul — Split TTR011
This product includes a free digital download in the format of your choice. Check your confirmation email for instructions.
Six track split EP from two of the most exciting coming out of the underground UK hardcore scene. Recorded by The Long Haul's own Lewis Johns at the Ranch Production House and released on limited 10" vinyl and CD, each with separate artwork. Vinyl co-released with IIOVV.
Track Listing
- The Long Haul — Dead Soul Endless Drag
- The Long Haul — Lost Harmony
- The Long Haul — The Passing of Dreamers
- Kerouac — I Owe Some People The World But I Owe You Shit
- Kerouac — Young Wounds
- Kerouac — Porcelain
Pressing Information
250 / Grey


text:
The Frugal Family Christmas Day Menu
Figs with Parma Ham
Main Course
Turkey Breast and Slow Cooker Gammon served with Yorkshire Puddings,
Roast Potatoes, Mashed Potatoes, Honey Roasted Parsnips, Carrots, Broccoli and Pigs in Blankets.
. . . → Read More: How to have a frugal Christmas – Christmas Dinner….


text:
ISPConfig 3 System > Server Config
View Single Post
31st December 2008, 08:04
Junior Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 6
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
ISPConfig 3 System > Server Config
Version: 18.104.22.168 rc1
Not sure if its a bug or something that's working as intended.
Under System > Server Config > Then you choose the Tab Web.
In the field: Website Path, the variable: [website_domain] doesn't get resolved to what its supposed to be. It just creates a folder named: [website_domain]
The reason im using this is cause i don't want a lot of folders called web3,4,5 etc, i just want them with the domain name.
Would also be neat if you can see usable variables one can use.
One thing i also would like on the same "page" under the Tab Web, is modifying Log location.
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text:
Protection for Generics Companies, But Not Patients
In a decision handed down late last week, the US Supreme Court gave manufacturers of generic drugs significant legal protection from liability. In Pliva v. Mensing, the Court ruled that patients cannot sue these companies under state law for failing to warn them about the risks associated with their drugs. Although generic-drug firms may welcome the decision, I think it has unpalatable implications.
The case began after several patients took a generic version of metoclopramide for stomach ailments and ultimately developed tardive dyskinesia, a serious neurological disease. As required under federal law, the label for the generic product was the same as that for the branded drug, which was no longer available. But the plaintiffs alleged that the manufacturer of the generic drug had evidence about the product's potential side effects and failed to alert FDA about them as state law required.
In his majority opinion, Justice Thomas ruled that federal law pre-empts the plaintiffs' suit. A company cannot comply both with federal law, which requires manufacturers to use the same warning label as that for the branded product, and with a state law that requires them to change the warning label when evidence supports it, he held. In such an instance, federal law prevails over state law. Yet Thomas conceded that if the generic-drug manufacturers had asked FDA for help in changing the corresponding brand-name label, they might have been able to accomplish under federal law what state law required.
In her dissent, Justice Sotomayor wrote that FDA requires generic-drug firms to propose label changes when they believe that a label is inadequate. But the defendants (Actavis and Pliva) made no such proposals. Generic-drug manufacturers might sometimes be able to prove that it would be impossible for them to comply with federal and state laws regarding labeling, wrote Sotomayor. But the defendants showed "only that they might have been unable to comply with both federal law and their state-law duties to warn" the plaintiffs about side effects [emphasis mine].
"As a result of today's decision, whether a consumer harmed by inadequate warnings can obtain relief turns solely on the happenstance of whether her pharmacist filled her prescription with a brand-name or generic drug," wrote Sotomayor. Given that more and more prescriptions are being filled with generic drugs, this conclusion is distinctly troubling.
In light of the Court's decision, we may need to re-evaluate the process for changing drug labels to ensure that it is sound and reasoned without being onerous. Most importantly, we need to protect patients' right to seek redress if any manufacturer has failed in its obligation to provide adequate warnings about potential side effects.


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First TV Spot from DEAD MAN DOWN Starring Colin Farrell and Noomi Rapace; 4 TV Spots from DARK SKIES Starring Keri Russell and Josh Hamilton
by Dave Trumbore Posted 1 year, 314 days ago
We have some new TV spots to share with you from the following films:
- Dead Man Down – Director Niels Arden Oplev's crime thriller starring Colin Farrell and Noomi Rapace as an unlikely pair out for revenge against a mob boss. Dead Man Down, also starring Dominic Cooper and Terrence Howard, opens March 8th.
- Dark Skies – Writer/director Scott Charles Stewart's sci-fi thriller starring Keri Russell and Josh Hamilton as struggling parents whose limits are tested when strange events start happening to their family. Also starring Dakota Goyo and J.K. Simmons, Dark Skies opens February 22nd.
Hit the jump to watch the TV spots.


text:
- You are here:
- Automobiles >
- Videos >
- Page 2
SRT Videos
SRT stands for Street & Racing Technology. What began as a group within Chrysler tasked with developing specialty vehicles like the Viper and Prowler (the group was originally called Specialty Vehicle Engineering) later grew to become the automaker's in-house performance vehicle development group. SRT has today become its own brand within Chrysler that continues to tune vehicles for each of the company's brands, as well as offer its own vehicle, the iconic Viper.