text:
tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33103536247386327802014-10-14T08:14:00.945-07:00The Armchair Empire's Propaganda MachineFrom the brain and typing fingers of Aaron Simmer, short articles, pictures, and opinions that are just too darn oblique or off-handed to appear on The Armchair Empire family of websites.Aaron email@example.com:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-53001740217286767002014-10-03T08:28:00.001-07:002014-10-03T08:29:20.060-07:00"Mental State"I think I'll call this doodle, Mental State:

Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/10/mental-state.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-23621738361661069412014-08-28T22:40:00.002-07:002014-08-28T22:41:59.458-07:00Chapter 11: All Things EmbracedThe text below is from a novel in progress. First draft so there's still plenty of editing that will need to be done before it's "ready."

Phineas read the story again.

It started on the front page, accompanied by the most incomprehensible picture he'd ever seen, and he'd seen many, many pictures, the story lacked some detail but even the generalities and the statement from the first responders to the scene – "I've been a paramedic for 20 years and I have never, ever seen anything like this." – were enough for Phineas to realize that he needed to find out what was going on there. One other strange detail – and there were no officials that even commented on how it could have happened – was the blanket media broadcast that occurred alerting everyone within a bubble of 20 kilometers to the address of the biggest crime scene that part of the country had ever seen. The fringe corners of the Internet and late night radio were inundated with various recordings of the soothing female voice repeating the address over and over. This was something Phineas found out later. He also found that several other details were being purposely omitted by the mainstream media.

There was no hiding the details though. The fact that media, curious people, and first responders arrived on the scene almost at the same time, meant that amid the chaos of the scene there was no control, no one to put up police tape and push people out.

The front page that Phineas looked at had neat smudges where the names of the victims/skeletons had been etched into the ground. Why the newspaper had obscured the name was not something that Phineas could understand but there in the background... He removed a large magnifying glass from his desk, from the drawer directly above the large locked cabinet section of his desk. He peered through the lens. More clearly but still somewhat hidden was the beginning of a name, "Char" then smudge. Phineas supposed it could have been an "m" or an "n" where the text was obscured.

The official story was that an explosion, presumably caused by some kind of new drug lab, had caused major loss of life and that two suspects were being questioned.

Needless to say, it would be a long arduous task to unravel the mystery behind what really happened.

Or it would have been had Phineas not picked up his phone and dialed – he'd resisted switching to a keypad phone – an old friend and private detective. More importantly, an old friend that would believe enough of what he said to actually follow through on an investigation.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/08/chapter-11-all-things-embraced.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-71834115824983405622014-08-27T17:57:00.001-07:002014-08-27T17:57:12.922-07:00Difference of OpinionWhat did you do that last time you had a difference of opinion between you and someone else?

Did you reach for your worst insults and psychopathic ramblings, step menacingly forward and crunch a meaty paw into the face of the one that dared to voice a difference opinion? Did you just shrug your shoulders and carry on with a, "Hey, we don't agree on this but let's grab a beer?" Did you banter back and forth, ironing out the wrinkles between you? Grope for understanding or staunchly dig your heels in, not wanting to understand?

A difference of opinion, is that really licence to threaten the other?

From my corner of the Internet -- or least the view from my corner of the Internet -- is that one. If someone dares to offer an opinion different than your own that's a blanket licence to threaten not just the person that holds a different opinion but also threaten friends and family of that person. And if the individual with a differing opinion comes from a woman and involves video games... oh dear God.

Suddenly it's "okay" to assume the persona of the Zodiac Killer and tweet epically vile hate in an effort to elicit terror and fear. What the hell is wrong with people?Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/08/difference-of-opinion.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-1181245316542802022014-08-19T16:16:00.003-07:002014-08-19T16:26:20.262-07:00"Listicle"

It's amazing to me that until recently I had never heard the word "listicle." Out of context, it could describe either a popsicle gone wrong or the way a man walks after having a testicle removed (i.e. listing to the side, like a boat taking on water). For the uniformed (and a reminder to myself), a "listicle" is an article on the Internet which is a list. (They used to call "Top 10's" but for some reason that fell out of favour -- and besides coming up with 10 of anything is hard. The 5-8 range is much easier to hit.)

Topics of these lists oscillate between dumb to incredibly stupid. You've seen them before and you probably haven't seen the last of them.

One that caught my eye recently was posted on Inc.com, "8 Things You Should Never Do in a Job Interview." The list included such common sense items as don't eat during the interview, don't slouch, and don't answer any calls or texts during the meeting but in practicality there's no end to a list like this one, so I present to you "8 Other Things You Should Never Do in a Job Interview."

Don't Shit Your Pants

Take care of any bowel movements prior to the interview. Nothing sinks your chances of a getting a job faster than filling your pants as you say, "It's nice to meet you, too, Gerry."

Additionally, try to empty your bowels at home because you don't want to be known as that would-be employee who fogged the bathroom with an unspeakable and nose-exploding odour. And if you landed the job... It's the kind of thing a person has a hard time living down.

Don't Make Sly References to Your Sexual Prowess

While double-entendres and sly references of a sexual nature worked well for James Bond (especially during the reign of Connery and Moore), it's nearly impossible to slip one in and get anything but a flaccid response.

Don't Wear a Monocle

Unless you're applying for a position as the Spy from the board game Stratego or a 19th Century railroad tycoon, leave the monocle at home. At worse it makes you look pretentious; at best it makes it look like you misplaced your top hat.

Don't Plead the 5th to Every Question

Don't "plead the 5th" to interview questions. Rather, answer questions that you think aren't fair or you didn't hear because you were looking out the window with, "I refuse to answer that on the basis of my dietary requirements."

Hmmm... maybe don't do the "dietary requirements" thing. It might just confuse the interviewer. Answer honestly and enthusiastically and you'll be good.

Don't Stab the Interviewer with a Pencil

Physical violence never solved anything, except maybe World War II, so don't stab an interviewer with a pencil or with any pencil-shaped objects including letter openers or pens no matter how much the interviewer's tie or scarf may offend your sensibilities. Really, you should just let the interviewer know that his tie or scarf offends you and really anyone with a smidgen of good taste would realize that the accessory is in bad taste...

Actually, just keep that thought to yourself.

Don't Come to an Interview Drunk

This seems like a no-brainer piece of advice. Unless you're auditioning for the role Otis Campbell, Mayberry's town drunk, in the stage production of "The Andy Griffith Show" leave the hard drinking for the moments after the interview. (Be clear of the reception area as well.)

Don't Speak in Movie Quotes
The "You Can't Handle The Truth!" exchange works for A Few Good Men but it rarely conveys one's ability to be a team player, consensus builder, and trusted employee. Also, steer clear of dialogue from Scarface, Goodfellas, Taxi Driver, Forrest Gump, Jerry Maguire or UHF.

Don't Role-Play During an Interview
At many interviews, the interaction will end with, "And do you have any questions for us?" Do not answer with any variation of, "I do have some questions but I'll ask them as my D&D character, Ezra McPuffin!"
Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/08/listicle.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-81407341406365638202014-06-26T12:34:00.001-07:002014-06-26T13:30:13.140-07:00Why I Wear a Watch

With the prevalence of cell phones and clocks seemingly embedded in everything, it seems that the wristwatch (and to a greater extent the pocket watch) is losing it's purpose. It seems like it has become a status symbol more than anything.

I've been thinking about why I wear a watch a lot this week because I had the battery replaced for my watch.

I don't wear a watch as a status symbol. Besides having the current time always a glance away, I wear a watch in case I need to improvise...

I trace that thought back to all the James Bond novels (the original Ian Fleming books) I read as a kid. Though it may have only been mentioned a couple of times as Bond thought of ways to escape some diabolical trap or gain an advantage during a fight, it seemed to be very practical knowledge:

If there's no access to a weapon, use your watch as "padding" for your knuckles .

It's a handy Life Tip, like using club soda to remove stubborn stains.
Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/06/why-i-wear-watch.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-87185137826785548442014-05-02T11:34:00.004-07:002014-05-02T11:36:25.215-07:00Some From Chapter 6 - DRAFTThe text below is from a novel in progress. First draft so there's still plenty of editing that will need to be done before it's "ready."

Nicola Tesla loathed the nickname "Tessie" but he put up with it from the most astute and clever clerk he'd ever employed. Mind you, the idea Tesla has employing the clerk was slightly misleading. Tesla was flat broke and all of his funding was courtesy of J.P. Morgan. If anything, Michael Silver was in the employ of Morgan. The thought temporarily infuriated Tesla but was assuaged by the thought of these secret experiments being carried out on Morgan's financial generosity without the financier's knowledge.

Employees, both of us of that drooling imbecile J.P. Morgan. I have the barest of authority here at what is to be my crowning achievement. Wireless is but a shortsighted goal. The horizon brings limitless power!

"Tessie, shouldn't we make all haste to complete this run prior to arrival of the inclement weather?"

The Wardenclyffe Tower dominated the horizon, it's massive base extending nearly 200 feet upward and the squat mushroom-like (and barely finished) dome on top. Tesla turned to face the south. The inclement weather was a hurricane remnant flushing across the Eastern Seaboard. It was expected to arrive at nightfall.

"Quite," Tesla said, turning back toward the tower and increasing his pace. He felt light-headed. He must have forgotten to eat. For two days, at least, he thought.

The pair soon arrived at a small door, which lead down into the earth under the main building where the heavy equipment sat waiting activation. Silver and Telsa removed their wet overcoats and donned white jackets that is the hallmark of scientist the world over (and even some other worlds). Knobs were turned, switches moved, gauge needles jiggled and jolted, equipment began to hum with potential, as the two scientist rechecked calculations, occasionally leaping across the room to make an adjustment.

In no time, the small room was stifling and the smell of ozone was practically a stench. Silver's lab coat was drenched with sweat; Telsa barely prespired, even under the most difficult and demanding experiments.

"The weather may already be upon us," Telsa noted. The storm shouldn't affect the outcome, he thought. He looked at the barometer. He could see the needle plunging. If only I could control the weather. "I would not expect any discernable effect on the equipment or this test but stay lively on the shut-off out of necessity."

Tesla pushed a bright red button, no larger than something one might find on a waistcoat. Not one for dramatic gestures, at least in private, Tesla felt a dramatic button press should cap this historical endeavour. No historical turning point ever happened with a switch or a whimper. He raised his left hand and slapped it down on the button. "It's away!"

Every light and piece of equipment in the lab dimmed as the current was pulled away, rocketing into the superstructure above. A hum began to build. A clipboard vibrated off the main workbench along the west side of the room.

A few moments into the experiment and Tesla knew, could feel it in the air, that something had been miscalculated or thrown from alignment.

Quite frankly, "thrown from alignment" was a vast understatement but Tesla couldn't know -- or at least wouldn't know until sometime after the fact -- that the tower superstructure had been jolted with bolts of lightning. It was as if Zeus himself had directed the lighting, all 37 of them. The reverberations were felt for miles across Long Island Sound and could be heard as far away as New York, but it also stretched across space and time like no other event before it. The "Big Bang" is a big deal for those in this dimension -- the dimension where most of this story occurs -- but the experiment at Wardenclyffe was to have a far great implication on the multiverse than even that piddling event.

Oh, the Big Bang, so many problems with that particular theory, that it hardly warrants a comment at this point in the story. It's so three dimensional!Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/05/some-from-chapter-6-draft.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-26371278770428602032014-04-14T22:03:00.001-07:002014-04-14T22:03:04.880-07:00A Metaphor for Maple SyrupThese days I'd like nothing more than to be able to write an epic novel that confounds critics and is generally inscrutable to the general public. After years of public speaking tours and millions of copies sold, most of them to unsuspecting university students since the novel is part of the curriculum, I would be standing at a podium addressing a gaggle of elite academics. I imagine most of them would be either stroking beards or leaning forward on a balled up fist, listening intently.

I would be introduced.

I would approach the podium and offer a brief reading.

Some earnest doctorate student would stand up to ask a question.

"But what does it all mean?"

And I would say, "It's a metaphor for maple syrup."

At which point I would kick the podium over and disappear. Stage right.
Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/04/a-metaphor-for-maple-syrup.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-62693462615472614932014-02-26T23:50:00.001-08:002014-02-26T23:50:22.204-08:00Apropos of NothingThis has been stuck in my head:

Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/02/apropos-of-nothing.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-48156683558506099512014-02-05T11:37:00.002-08:002014-02-05T11:47:18.720-08:00Flaming Cat

It's a well-known fact that our orange and white cat's tail is completely without feeling thanks to some unknown past injury. (It may or may not have been due to Milo's stint with the Canadian Special Forces before he came to live with us. Prior to life at the SPCA, who's to say what a cat gets up to?)

That fact has saved him some pretty painful moments, like the times I've stepped on his tail or his tail has been caught in a door. But that complete numbness -- the kind of numb that many people pay loads of money to attain at the bar -- is a liability when it comes to something like fire.

Not some kind of metaphorical fire, but actual fire.

A bit of a cold snap in these parts means the wood stove is getting a workout. As any cat owner will tell you, a heat source means a curled up feline somewhere nearby. In the absence of a sunny spot, Milo took up a location a little too close to the wood stove that's supplying the majority of the heat for the house and managed to singe off some hair on his tail.

As my wife described it to me over the phone, "There was this weird burning smell all of the sudden and Milo your tail's on fire!"

Lucky for him, it's barely noticeable. Lucky for us, his tail didn't burst into flames. That's the kind of thing that would get a cat moving even if it he can't feel his tail. And you just know he'd make a beeline for a couch or bed to hide under. I briefly imagined describing a claim to our insurance company:

"Well, the cat was on fire, because he has no feeling in his tail, and then the bed was on fire and, well, here we are now standing in front of a smouldering ruin."

Not sure if the incident has taught him anything but he's not the only one missing the warmer weather.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/02/flaming-cat.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-66502385770141729022014-01-14T08:57:00.003-08:002014-01-14T08:57:55.467-08:00An Excerpt from Chapter 4The text below is from a novel in progress. First draft so there's still plenty of editing that will need to be done before it's "ready."

"We'll, I guess this gives me a good excuse to do it now." Aloysius sat on the couch and dumped the contents of the bag on the couch. He swept the clothes to the floor and plunked the Red on the coffee table. "I'm putting this to bed."

He snapped open two cans of Red and chugged them down. It wasn't a bad time either, probably 15 seconds. He snapped the third and looked at Roy.

"After I drink this and nothing happens, I don't want to hear anything more about me being a superhero or magic potions, or shape-shifting. Okay? Deal?"

Roy nodded his head in agreement. He shifted forward in his seat. "Bottom's up!"

A soft warmth had started to spread to Aloysius' extremities. He tipped the can to his lips and eight seconds later it was empty.

Roy sat expectantly. Aloysius felt the alcohol smack into his brain. It was a lot of Red to guzzle at one time. Three cans in less than a minute was enough to inebriate even heavy drinkers.

Something happened.

The belch that boiled from Aloysius' mouth was something out of legend. Windows rattled, Roy was pushed back in his seat, and a box of Cheerios on the table tipped over and spilled onto the floor.

"Not..." Roy started to say something but the words stopped. His mouth gained traction again. "That was a superhuman belch, boy."

"Ri-i-i-i-ght," Aloysius drawled. He wasn't sure if the word was slurred but he felt like it should be.

"Now do something else that's super!" Roy said. His grin showed teeth, his eyes mirth. He tipped his beer bottle at Aloysius. His eyes wandered the apartment. "Pick up the fridge!"

"Pick ub the frigge? Yesh!" Aloysius eased up to his feet. "Juss ta prove itsh a lotta nonsensh."

Adopting a stumbling gait and nearby furniture, Aloysius made it to the fridge. He bent with his knees (just like stockboys the world over are instructed to do), squeezed his fingers under the lip of the front of the fridge, and lifted with his legs.

The fridge smashed through the ceiling, the three floors above, and the roof.

Drywall dust, bits of wood, floated down. Then water. The fridge-sized hole suddenly had a water feature. Aloysius stood rooted to the spot, water poured down on him. The broken water lines above weren't going to stop gushing anytime soon. The tenant in the top floor apartment peered down at Aloysius.

"What the hell happened. Al?" she shouted.

Roy looked up at the neighbour. "Explosion or something, Annie. You okay?"

"I'm fine, but my kitchen's a goddamned mess."Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/01/an-excerpt-from-chapter-4.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-20442301668720152702014-01-10T14:52:00.001-08:002014-01-10T14:52:19.896-08:00House of Cards

After multiple recommendations, my wife and I started watching Netflix's "House of Cards."

I didn't know what to expect because the only thing I'd heard about it was that it was a "political show" so I was surprised when it started with Kevin Spacey's character killing a dog with his bare hands as he looks right at the audience and spouts a short monologue.

Granted the dog had just been run over by a car and would have probably died anyway, but the fact he finishes off the animal in such a manner while offering information to the audience like an ice-cold, grown-up version of Ferris Bueller had me wanting to watch more.

Most of the time I have no idea what's going on -- not being the kind of person that's knowledgeable about the inner workings of the US government -- but I'm still enjoying it, mostly because of Kevin Spacey and the calm reasoning of his character. Just a few episodes remain so I'm glad season 2 isn't far off.Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/01/house-of-cards.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-1212730387534785562014-01-06T13:59:00.002-08:002014-01-06T14:00:21.086-08:00Some From Chapter 3The sobbing was happening somewhere in the opposite direction of the nurse. Aloysius glanced left and right and started down the hallway, gulping the beer from the can as quietly as possible.

At the end of the passage he found the room where the crying was coming from. He stopped short of entering the room, fighting the urge to cross the threshold to find out if the woman sobbing -- whether in grief or pain -- was the same that had dopplered by his room earlier.

"Sir," a low voice said behind him, "Mr. Vitus, what are you doing wandering around this time of night?"

Aloysius did his best to hide the beer behind his back as he turned around.

"Couldn't sleep, I was uncomfortable, wound's itchy, thought I heard a noise, had a nightmare, looking for a glass of water," Aloysius babbled. He could feel his face going red.

"If you need a little walk to calm yourself or," the nurse was a dozen paces away, "Whatever it is you're doing, don't bother the other patients. They need their peace."

"Oh yeah, I know it. All too well." Aloysius turned, spinning the can to his front, took three paces and turned at the corner. His right foot coldly slapped against the polished granite. He gulped the rest of the beer and ditched the can in a bin marked for biohazards.

He leaned toward the corner to listen for the nurse. The hospital swallowed sound at this hour so he barely heard a cupboard door close and footsteps headed away from him.

The wracked sobbing, as quiet as it was, still leaked out from the roof at the end of the hall.

Fortified as he was, Aloysius took four or five confident, if somewhat lopsided, steps to the room and boldly entered.

A small light was on next to the bed of a black-haired woman in her mid-30s. Her hair was parted by large gauze bandage, that was becoming sodden with fresh blood. Aloysius couldn't see them but there were many stiches holding her scalp together.Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2014/01/some-from-chapter-3.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-21832962358573741952013-12-04T11:48:00.000-08:002014-01-14T13:32:04.306-08:00From Chapter 1: Some Years EarlierWith all the sensibility borne of a alcohol and a short temper, Roy slammed his forehead with a great crunching sound against the mound of muscle.

And it was right at that moment when time stopped for Aloysious. He glanced around the room. The ceiling fans were stopped. Gina hung motionless above a bank of manufactured cloud that didn't stir. The mound of muscle was frozen in a grimace of pain, his body in the midst of falling down; the phalanx of equally muscled friends with looks of shock and anger stretched on their faces. Aloysious stood up. Everything remained still then a heartbeat later the world started to vibrate and he exploded in a cacophonous wave that suddenly thawed the motion in the room.

It was a violent thaw -- people knocked against each other, every bottle of booze at the bar shattered, and the closest people, mainly the wall of flesh and his friends, had their clothes shredded.

Gina seemed to be the only one unaffected. Hands on her hips, she actually appeared annoyed that someone had exploded at what was to be the climax of her routine.

Aloysious snapped back into existence. Roy didn't even have to shout a drunken question at Aloysious before they started stumbling toward the exit.

Aloysious didn't know what it was, but he knew he had to get the hell outside, to the relative safety of the Murder Capital of the World.

"Hey, boy," Roy rasped. "What's happening to your skin?"

Aloysious looked at his exposed forearms. The skin was sloughing off in ragged tears and a brilliant white light was searing out from him. "Oh shit," he said.

A mattress with it's innards spilling out, suddenly flew across the street straight toward Aloysious. A thin arc of light crackled out from Aloysious and struck the mattress, which promptly and dramatically vanished. A car battery began a short flight from the doorway of a derelict apartment and the same small arc of light snapped out and made it vanish.

"How are you doing that, man?" Roy said. He took out his phone and started recording, fumbling just a bit and not really able to hold the phone steady. Roy watched as the rest of Aloysious skin and clothes fell off in ragged pieces. The Skin Joint's patrons had all exited to the street, but some were now trying to head back inside.

Aloysious was a being of pure light and every piece of garbage and refuse in a three block radius starting flying and tumbling through the streets and out windows toward him. When the material reached Aloysious the arc of light snapped out from him. At times he resembled a living Tesla coil.

Then the music started. It was XXXXX's tune. And it seemed to the witnesses there that it was blasting out of every piece of electronic equipment with a speaker, including Roy's phone.

Suddenly the neighbourhood was transformed into a happy music video.

The garbage gone, crumbled buildings began reforming, buildings that needed painting were suddenly covered in bright pastels, the lines on the street looked like a machine had just laid them down, dented garbage cans were suddenly smooth. People started dancing. The man made of pure light started dancing, too. Fireworks started rising above the building.

A single mother in 3B who happened to be standing in front of her mostly empty refrigerator was shocked to see that is had been fully stocked; the same for the cupboards. And she saw the roaches vanish.

Within moments and in a euphoric wave, the several blocks of the Murder Capital of the World, looked as if a picture of the perfect town had suddenly come to life. Street lights flickered on for the first time in many years and the man made of light rocketed out of sight leaving a bewildered but smiling friend behind.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/12/from-chapter-1-some-years-earlier.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-13511243090162206952013-12-03T08:58:00.002-08:002013-12-03T08:58:49.407-08:00Prologue: The FutureThe bar was full of the haze of cigar smoke, the smell of cigar was heavy in the air and accented by stale, spilled beer. The seat on which Aloysius sat was uncomfortable, the padding long squashed flat by an army of drunks before him.

He shifted again, the tenth time in as many minutes. The wait was itself uncomfortable, never mind the seat.

Someone dropped money into an jukebox across the room. Instead of warming to life, lighting up with bent neon tubes, the speakers crackled and hissed, and suddenly Aerosmith's "Crazy" was ricocheting off the walls. It was earsplitting and it wasn't making the wait any easier.

Aloysious knew he was in the right spot, could feel it. He'd already downed two Red's -- Brewed in the Heart of Saskatchewan! the label touted -- and the third sat in front of him. He'd insisted that the bartender just leave it in the can. The "I like it that way," explanation seemed enough. But Aloysious could tell from the bartender's expression and sudden silence that he had Aloysious pegged as someone who wanted to get drunk fast and for not much money.

The change from the $10 bill sat in front of Aloysious. Three beers for under $10. That was the magic of Red. It was cheap and loaded with alcohol.

Aloysious glanced over his shoulder. A couple of biker types playing pool, two grizzled ladies of the evening crowded into a booth by the door not saying anything to each other, and a smattering of single guys, empty shot glasses lined up like some kind of glassware firing squad. Aerosmith was still raging. Aloysious looked down at the can then let his eyes slide toward the change.

He didn't want to to acknowledge that he saw it but he had to admit it. The coins were vibrating, just ever so slightly, almost imperceptibly.

He scratched his beard, extended the scratch to the back of his neck. The coins were very visibly vibrating on the bar.

Whatever was about to happen, the thing he knew was going to happen, the thing that brought him here to this time, this place, this corner of Alberta, was just about to smash through a wall. Or possibly tear off the roof and reach into the bar to snack on a pickled patron.

He lifted the third can of Red to his lips.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/12/prologue-future.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-54767157189787604822013-10-31T15:38:00.000-07:002013-12-04T11:48:48.987-08:00Flashlights

Explosion proof!

I have this vague recollection of how I got my first "grown up" flashlight.

I was 8 or 9 and it was a gift -- Christmas? Birthday? I don't remember. I still have it. It's a black 2D Maglite. Over the last ~25 years I've had the flashlight, it has picked-up numerous nicks, scratches, at least one set of batteries leaked inside the tube, and the rubberized cover for the on/off button recently came off and has been lost. Still, it works and that's the important thing.

Even before that I had this weird attachment to flashlights.

I remember playing in the front yard of our house with my dad's silver flashlight that had a switch and a "Morse code" button. Tapping the button to send messages just seemed like the cool thing to do. Usually, I'd be out there in the fog because then it looked like a lightsaber. My brother and I would make the appropriate "zzzwong, bzzzzit" lightsaber noises.

Just look at the size of that flashlight!

Since then I've always jumped at the chance to get my hands on a flashlight, especially after watching movies or TV shows that featured them prominently. X-Files was really bad for this because the main characters Mulder and Scully would run around in the dark with some really awesome flashlights, big and small. Batman always seemed to have one ready on his utility belt. I practically wept the first time saw Alan Wake in motion.

"Wept" might be a strong descriptor but there was definitely a chill that zoomed up my spine.

And this weird "obsession" with flashlights continues. I mean have you seen the latest LED models? I bought one recently that has an effective range of about 70m, has a really tight beam, and runs on two AA batteries for $14. Blows my mind, especially in practice when I'm trooping through the pitch black and click it on. Besides alleviating terror, it almost makes me feel a little cool.

And while headlamps are an alternative to my compact lighting desires -- they're especially handy for car repairs or situations where both hands should be free -- they haven't replaced that need for a flashlight.

Alan Wake.

Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/10/flashlights.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-47494996303531059862013-09-25T03:30:00.000-07:002013-09-25T13:00:36.862-07:00Definitely a Chill DevelopingHeading out to work the other day I couldn't help but feel the chill of Autumn.

Most of the leaves haven't started turning yet but there's that definite damp cold, not quite crisp, hanging in the air. It's enough to sting your face if you're racing down a hill.

It makes me think of street hockey, light fading sooner and much more quickly, but also sleep and Halloween.

We've moved to a place where getting "trick or treaters" at the house might not happen. I'd wager that it won't happen unless we specifically invite them. There are community events planned but it looks like my kids are going to miss out on what I remember so well about Halloween: Sprinting from house to house with only sugar on my mind.

The fact it always seemed to be done with friends didn't hurt either. As we got a little older and we had discretionary dollars to spend, (illegal) firecrackers played into the Halloween rituals. Not so much on the night of, but in the lead-up to the big night.

We'd spend hours constructing various bottle rocket launchers, figuring out which cans could be used to best amplify the sound, or in one case stringing multiple fire crackers -- Black Cats, Mighty Mites -- together to create "movie effects" that resulted in skin abrasions and minor burns.

NOTE: Single-stage bottle rockets are far, far superior to three-stage bottle rockets.

It's no wonder War is often laid at the feet of Men. I think the important thing to remember is that it's probably the fact we like watching things explode more than really liking War or hating a group or country so much there's no other resolution than outright destruction. Nope. It's because we like seeing thing explode because it massages that part of our brain that enjoys looking at shiny things. Transports our brains back to the first time Fire imprinted on our collective subconsciousness.

Anyway, we're definitely on track to colder nights, shorter days, and free candy.

Next time I'll share my theory on why human populations tend to cluster around bodies of water.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/09/definitely-chill-developing.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-72580185697436283172013-09-10T05:00:00.000-07:002013-12-04T11:48:30.995-08:00FoggyMy weekly commute is one long ferry ride. On this particular ride, the route was covered in intense fog. Besides an unreasonable terror with the thought that The Mist had finally become a reality, it created the feeling that we weren't moving.

The sway of the boat, the thrum of the engines were a couple of signs that at least the feeling of motion was present. Inching toward some destination. But a look out the window provided only a sliver of water visible close to the hull. It certainly looked like the boat was moving. But really, we could have been stuck in a giant fish tank with a jet of water pushing against the boat and the only thing preventing us from banging against the back of the tank was the throb of the engine. It was a really odd feeling of equilibrium.

No backward. No forward. Almost like Time had vanished. It was unnerving.Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/09/foggy.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-47799431173912726082013-08-15T11:09:00.002-07:002013-08-15T11:09:31.775-07:00Septic Sure is Something ElseUp until a few weeks ago, I didn't give much thought to what happens to the contents of a toilet bowl when the handle is pushed down because, hey, who thinks about that stuff? Get it out of my sight so I don't have to look at it!

For the last couple of weeks, I've spent an inordinate amount of time thinking about it, pondering over it. That flushing action takes the contents somewhere and it's the process of getting to that somewhere and the somewhere itself that have stolen my attention.

Crash course on our septic system is this:

Flush the toilet (drain the sink, run the washing machine, etc.)

Water flows down the drain into a big concrete septic tank

The solids settle out toward the bottom

The liquid stays on top reaching a specific level before spilling into the pump chamber

Once the liquid in the pump chamber reaches a specific height, the septic pump activates and pushes the liquid in the pump chamber up to the distribution box

The distribution box is essentially a junction box with branching lines of perforated PVC pipe to distribute the liquid across an area that's known as the septic field.

It seems that at any point along the way the system could utterly fail.

The tank could crack. The pipe from the septic tank to the pump chamber could leak. The pump could fail. The septic field could get clogged with sludge. So many different things could happen! And in order to investigate any issue, the smell -- oh, the smell! -- is ever-present.

At our new place we had to contend with an old pump that needed to be replaced evidenced by the fact it wasn't working the moment we moved into the house.

It was more along the lines a stream of profanity and, Oh God, never mind going to the bathroom, how do I run the washing machine? Wash dishes, even in the sink? It brings into stark reality just how much water we actually use.

Let me back up a little bit (har, har), and say that I didn't actually have to deal with any of this since I was at work for the week and my wife was left to deal with the problem, which involved many phone calls and trying to pull in favours from... well, we don't know anyone in the community so doing the old friend of a friend thing wasn't possible. She was firing blind! Contacting a pump truck (to empty the septic tank) and what we thought was a plumber but turned out to be an electrician (who "kind of does a lot of things") and getting the pump replaced was an ordeal that lasted several days.

It's mostly resolved as far as we can tell.
Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/08/septic-sure-is-something-else.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-60370424101429458652013-07-29T23:02:00.006-07:002013-07-29T23:02:59.464-07:00The Welcoming Committee of OneAfter days and days of packing up our possessions and lives, and some days to move all of them out of the city and into a quiet -- more accurately, a small island -- setting, I had finally put my feet up on the recently assembled coffee table and let out a bone-weary sigh.

It was quiet outside.

No sirens. No cars. No commercial jets.

Birds, a slight rustle of some leaves in the late afternoon breeze... just the hint of ocean air but filtered through cedar, fir, and arbutus trees.

I let out another bone-weary sigh.

"Dad, Dad!" my oldest daughter yelled from the front yard. "You've gotta see this!"

All the kids had spent the day "deer spotting" which we've learned is like shooting a fish in a barrel on the island. (Without natural predators like bears or wolves and no hunting allowed, deer on the island are plentiful.) In the absence of real deer they would shout out false sightings and zing me with, "Made you look!" It had happened enough times in the day that I wasn't about to be zinged again. After all, I was wallowing in my bone-weariness.

"Sure, sure," I yelled from my seat in the living room. The french doors out to the deck were open.

My wife came up the stairs to the landing at the front door.

"What's going on?" she said. "Aaron, Aaron you've gotta see this!"

Okay, so maybe this time it wasn't an imaginary deer, I thought. I heaved myself up after rolling sideways off the couch and walked down the stairs to the front landing.

There, standing under the arbor that arches across the front path, was a donkey.

A donkey.

My eyes registered this fact before my concious self could decipher that there was a donkey standing not 15 feet away. My jaw swung open.

He nodded his head, backed up a little then walked up the lawn toward the main road. A "welcome" delivered and he was on his way again.

Remembering all those blurry Bigfoot images that dominated my early adolescence, I whipped out my phone to take some pictures. I managed to snag one. And wouldn't you know it -- blurry! But there's no denying it's actually a donkey of some sort and not two guys in a donkey suit.

On our way to the beach the next day, one of our new neighbours stopped and introduced himself. He mentioned he saw that the donkey had dropped by.

'Oh yeah, he's the neighbourhood donkey," he said. "Usually he roams around with a Shetland pony."

So, while some neighbourhoods are battling street corner drug dealers, drive-by shootings, urban blight, ours will cope with the Equine Duo of a donkey and a Shetland pony.

Seems fair to me.Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-welcoming-committee-of-one.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-32235949275615852872013-06-20T17:22:00.001-07:002013-06-20T17:22:41.381-07:00Wax On! Wax Off! WAX WAX!I really did think I would be blogging up a storm about games lately, especially with E3 in the rear-view mirror and the very recent flip-flop from Microsoft regarding their DRM/always on plan and the battle against used game sales, but I'm struggling with actually caring very much about games at the moment.

I'm not sure I want to turn this into a "Dear Diary..." exposition of my personal life but I feel comfortable enough to say that there are a lot of changes happening in my life and a particularly big change in a few weeks: moving.

I'll be honest, I hate moving.

It has a lot to do with the last time we packed up the house and moved everything.

We'd just returned from three weeks away in Florida and after a long drive back home from Seattle -- riding the bleeding edge of a snow/ice storm that turned the highways into bobsled runs -- and thought we were relatively prepared to move prior to leaving on vacation. How wrong we were! During the night, while we tried to shake jet lag, it snowed. Not a ton, but just enough to make manoeuvring a large moving truck extremely tricky. And, well, the list of things that went wrong extended from there -- more snow, taking way too long to pack our truck, etc. -- and at 1:00AM I was single-handedly trying to extricate the moving truck from the alley behind our new home with a shovel, handfuls of salt, and tubs of hot water. It was nasty! That was the first time I've ever been able to honestly say I was "bone tired" because I was barely functioning at the end of it and every step felt like an effort.

This time, instead of moving in February, we're moving in July and we've had a couple months to prepare by throwing out/giving away things we didn't think were worth moving, and packing away anything that could be packed. The house is looking more empty all the time and hopefully by zero-hour it's simply a matter of packing stuff into the van rather than running around the house with empty boxes dumping the random contents of drawers into the boxes.

It does shine a light on just how much "stuff" we've managed to accumulate over the last 5 or so years so I'm happy that we're trying to get things in order so that when we do arrive at our new place we're getting off on the right foot rather than digging through junk boxes again.

I've found my interest in video games waning recently, and this seems to be the reason why.

My interest in action figures has jumped though thanks to a local collectibles shop -- Big Pete's Collectibles -- moving a few doors down from their old location. In an effort to make the move easier, almost everything in the old shop was put slashed by 50%. I had to physically restrain myself from running to the nearest bank to stuff my pockets with cash! It's like advertising half-off booze to an alcoholic.

Big Pete's is such a good place to browse. It ranks second behind Toy Traders in Langley for the pure spectacle of it (more pictures below):

Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/06/wax-on-wax-off-wax-wax.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-80275305403120480392013-05-24T10:16:00.001-07:002013-05-24T11:21:30.889-07:00Brutal Legend Companion Video

A video companion piece to my recent Brutal Legend review on The Armchair Empire - Infinite. Here's a link to the full review in case you missed it.
Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/05/brutal-legend-companion-video.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-69127359161636459652013-05-23T13:23:00.004-07:002013-05-23T13:23:45.138-07:00Killing Data

The other day I cancelled the data plan for my phone.

For some, this might be the equivalent of suddenly deciding to live under a rock.

But it was a move that I needed to take after I realized how much time I frittered away scanning Twitter, Facebook, news sites, etc. looking for something to fill the time while I commuted, waited for the lights to change, went to the bathroom... It allowed me to avoid thinking for any length of time because I could always jump to something else in a bid to be entertained or somehow educated and kept up-to-date on what was happening in the world.

The moment of realization really began with a ride on the Seabus. I looked up an saw every other person madly texting or otherwise glued to their phone. For the rest of the ride home I left my phone on my hip and just watched, at the same time thinking about the necessity of being always connected to the Internet.

And it's not necessary.

Not to be confused
with...

I used to think what a time saver it would be to have the ability to send and answer emails while on the move, even though I hate using the touch screen to peck out messages and the fact I rarely responded to email while en route, I successfully fooled myself into thinking it was somehow better. Or needed.

Layer the fact that the data plan accounted for about half the phone bill, I wondered why I hadn't already cancelled it.

I'm in front of a computer all day and wifi hotspots are abundant, why did I need data for my phone?

I'll admit that it can come in handy when looking up a phone number or trying to access some other piece of information, but I always have the option to switch on data for brief periods to grab information. In an emergency situation, mind you.

... Rodin's Thinker.

I find that I'm thinking about things more, even if it's just base level like, "Man, that dude over there stinks. When was the last time he bathed? What kind of bacteria is swimming under his armpits right now?" Maybe if I can figure out that small thing, some greater truth might be revealed. Maybe. Whatever the case, my battery charge lasts a lot longer.

So, in summation: data cancelled, more money in my pocket (in theory), and more time to think.

Come to think of it, I'm probably less on edge as well because I'm not constantly reading horribly tragic news stories so add, "Happier" to that list.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/05/killing-data.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-78374957611506946572013-04-24T14:28:00.002-07:002013-04-24T14:30:55.962-07:00Christy Clark and Me

<centre>
<centre>The audio in the YouTube clip above came from an appearance on the Christy Clarke Show (on CKNW AM980 in Vancouver, BC) when I was guest just before Christmas 2007. I was there as a video game expert to talk about games, what was hot/not, what kids should and shouldn't be playing, etc. Unfortunately for me – and I've done nothing to rectify this particular issue – I have zero media training so it's kind of difficult to listen to five years after the fact.

Christy's first question, "So, what are the hot games this Christmas?"

What do I do? I completely sidestep the question and start monologuing about ESRB ratings.

</centre></centre>
The original question is a solid start and I'm sure I could have naturally slipped in information about the ESRB along the way, but I answer a question that wasn't asked.

In the first section of the clip, it's just Christy and I talking and the whole time I was wondering when we'd start taking calls. The fact we weren't just filled me with dread because it meant I wasn't engaging enough for people to want to call in with a question. My wife was thinking the same thing but I found out during the commercial break that there was a problem with the phones and they had fixed it for the second half.

First caller: my wife.

Since there were no calls to be heard, she became so concerned that I was boring the Lower Mainland, she called the radio station and sat on hold for 10 minutes until they figured out the phone situation. As the familiar sounds of home filtered across the studio speakers, I momentarily felt like I needed to bring to attention that this caller was my wife but for all I knew this would be the only caller.

Fortunately, there were other callers and just as I was getting into a groove, time was up and my segment was over. Besides starting to feel comfortable and actually answering questions that were asked of me rather than answering questions that hadn't been asked, most importantly, as opposed to my previous appearance with Jeff on Paul Myers' Show (in 2003, previously posted clip can be found here), I didn't descend into making things up on the fly. Score 1 for me!

As a footnote to this whole thing, it's worth noting that Christy Clark (BC Liberal) is currently the Premier of British Columbia. That may all change in May when the Provincial Election happens – if current polls are credible, it will change – because the current election campaign is getting pretty nasty.Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/04/christy-clark-and-me.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-52948658679111971892013-04-03T14:09:00.002-07:002013-04-03T20:05:15.959-07:00Couple Hours of BioShock Infinite

Hidden message in the title?

Besides getting a feeling of déjà vu a number of times during the opening hour or so of BioShock Infinite, I was struck by the repetition of character models.

Really, Irrational? This is the best you could come up with? Most games will hide the repetition of character models or mask it somehow, but BioShock Infinite does zero to hide the fact they're all the same. The kid selling papers is the exact same kid sitting on the garbage can a couple dozen feet away! After having "rescued" Elizabeth from the tower and splash landed on a beach, the same issue appeared. Of the couple dozen NPCs going through the motions on the sand, there were maybe three different characters to see.

Of course, then I started thinking there might be larger implications to this because of the way my brain processed the opening of the game, which pinged the same part of my brain that the television show LOST punched on a regular basis. It's that part of my brain where I try to figure out mysteries, make up answers to questions that weren't even asked in the first place. The game opens at the base of lighthouse, which first reminded me of the original BioShock and the opening plane crash, then after a quick ascent you come across a hooded figure bound to a chair, an obvious bullet hole in his forehead. There's no obvious reason for this scene, no discernible explanation why this guy's life ended the way it did.

Then you head outside and activate a puzzle which concludes with the sky lighting up and some really ominous smoke monster/Close Encounters of the Third Kind musical noises then rocketing up the Columbia after doing something really dumb.

Under no circumstances should you ever sit in a chair – no matter how comfortable it looks – that is situated by itself at the top of lighthouse.

Booker rockets up to the flying/floating metropolis of Columbia…

…to wade through a baptismal pool that stretches for rooms.

A near drowning – or maybe Booker really does drown – then he regains consciousness amid a cloud of freakin' hummingbirds. Not long after checking the first garbage can for food and/or money – because, let's face it, that's the first thing we'd all do – Booker chews through some guy's face with a "skyhook" after the "AD" brand on his right hand pegs him as the one who will "lead the lamb astray."

 There's a lot going on – a number even gets thrown in for good measure, "77", which is coincidentally the year of my birth and the year Elvis died (think about it) – so my brain has started spinning out answers to questions that may or may not be asked. Barely more than an hour in and my brain has started vomiting theories. How any of it comes together in a meaningful way obviously remains to be seen.

I will say that the game has become much more enjoyable now that Elizabeth is part of the game. The interaction between Booker and Elizabeth is great so far…

At the very least, she's a different character model to look at

Aaron firstname.lastname@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/04/couple-hours-of-bioshock-infinite.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3310353624738632780.post-38205051045712068412013-03-15T14:23:00.002-07:002013-03-15T14:23:25.108-07:00Take It to the Grave

One thing about this blog that I constantly struggle with is how much of myself I should reveal, especially because there's some anxiety – fear? – that my kids or parents will find the blog and suddenly know things they shouldn't. (And just typing that sentence might be enough to get both groups to wondering.)

I've always viewed personal blogs as online diaries. But I think a lot of people don't know how the Internet works.

People pour out their souls and innermost thoughts with little thought on how it might impact their job prospects, dating chances, and so on. Do you really want a potential employer or that cutie responding to your OKCupid profile to have the option of running your name through Google and finding that blog post you wrote about how you like to lick parrots? Or that travelogue of semi-legal houses of prostitution in Nevada? That half-remembered trip to Amsterdam? What about that post where you described in vivid detail the horrible rash developing on your inner thigh? Your marital problems? Your confessional post where you list all the people you ever stole money from?

"This man Jenkins, we should hire him," says HR. "Let's just type his name into Google here… oh, DEAR LORD! He made a sculpture of Mickey Mouse out of his own snot!"

So, that's kind of where this blog is. I don't want to reveal too much of what's actually going on in my head. That's why so much of what I write about is neutral video game or action figure stuff or posts about writing. Or random thoughts with no particular point. Gazing outward or inward, rather than splitting open the Mind Vault and drowning everyone in unnecessary and private details of my life.

It reminds me of that episode of The Simpsons where Homer teaches a class on marriage and spills the beans of his married life with Marge. She understandably becomes enraged and boots him out of the house.

Some things should just stay private.

Whatever happened to the thought of taking something to the grave? Why did that go out of fashion? Now it's about posting it to Facebook or Tweeting a picture of something that just maybe no one else needs to know about.

Imagine taking a handful of your last "drunk vacation" pics and approaching people on the street, asking them to look at the pictures and hear the stories behind them. You'd likely be ignored and/or actively avoided – a pan handler that doesn't want money. (That's the worst kind of pan handler, by the way.)

Somehow, online is the avenue for laying your psyche bare and writing about things that less than 10 years ago would have been mentioned to close family and friends, and then maybe in an embarrassed whisper.

I understand that it works the other way as well. If you have a Cause or need to spread the word about something, jumping onto a social media and spreading information like so much jam, is quick, easy, and can reach hundreds, thousands of people within minutes.

"My dog was just kidnapped! Keep your eye out for this pooch!" <DOG PICTURE HERE>

I've done that very thing. Privacy be damned, I don't care if people know I have a chocolate lab named Dupree, I need to find him!

But points of friction in my marriage? Conflict with family? Yeah, that's not your business. It's not my employers or co-workers business either.

Anyway, that's why you won't get the inside scoop on my private life here.
Aaron email@example.com://thearmchairempirespropagandamachine.blogspot.com/2013/03/take-it-to-grave.html


text:
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
Examraj.rajasthan.gov.in – Panchayati Raj District wise 19516 LDC Results/ Merit List Online Exam 2013
Rural Developments and Panchayati Raj Deapartment, Rajasthan will be published the LDC Results/Merit list district wise on its official website www.examraj.rajasthan.gov.in. Lower Division clerks results/ merit list is available online at official web portal.
Rajasthan Panchayati Raj LDC Final Result 2013 - Check below
Download Second list of Rajasthan Panchayati Raj LDC final result 2013.
LDC examination was held on 18 April 2013 and ow they all are waiting their results. Now the results has been declare district wise on below link.
How to Get the Lower Division Clerk Results district wise :-
1. The candidates who is eligible visit the official website www.examraj.rajasthan.gov.in
2. Candidates can visit the LDC direct recruitment 2013, results is online
3. Submit all information and collect your results with merit list quickly.
4. Print your results from the official website.
Check Rajasthan Panchayati Raj LDC Merit List 2013
Main web portal : exampraj.rajasthan.gov.in


text:
To print: Select File and then Print from your browser's menu
Frozen Awareness?
Quinn Phillips
January 19, 2010
One extremely common, if not always severe, condition associated with diabetes receives comparatively little discussion relative to other diabetes complications: Soft-tissue damage (believed to result from a buildup of glucose in the affected tissue) that leads to a fusing-together of collagen fibers and potentially constricts movement of the area.
Soft-tissue damage often occurs as frozen shoulder, characterized by pain throughout the shoulder and decreased range of motion in the joint. It can affect one or both shoulders. The condition usually starts with a "freezing" phase, in which there is an onset of a dull or aching pain and a loss of motion in the shoulder. This phase is followed by a "frozen" stage that is marked by an improvement in pain but with remaining stiffness. The final stage is "thawing," during which the motion of the shoulder returns to normal. A recent article in The New York Times highlights the high prevalence of frozen shoulder in people with diabetes: At least 20% have it at some point, compared with between 2% and 5% of the general population.
Without the link between diabetes and soft-tissue damage in mind, people with diabetes might not think to mention the problem during diabetes-related checkups. They might even think of it as a consequence of stress or aging that doesn't merit any thought or mention. Similarly, doctors might not think to highlight the relationship between blood glucose control and joint stiffness when a patient has not already raised the issue as a concern. And as the Times article notes, there are effective treatments for soft-tissue damage.
Have you had frozen shoulder or another soft-tissue complication? If so, do you feel that you were diagnosed and treated promptly and adequately? Do you have any advice or tips for others who experience this problem? Leave a comment below!
I've never heard of this -- and I feel relieved to know that this may be the reason for my joint problems. Just wondering...can this problem affect other joints besides the shoulders? My problem began with my shoulders. However, I now have the same problem with other joints, the most severe being my hips. Could sfot-tissue damage be the culprit for my hip stiffness and pain?
Posted by: Joanna Pelkey | Jan 22, 2010 12:47 AM
I had several issues with my left shoulder. When I went in for surgery to remove bone spurs, they discovered it was frozen so took care of that too. I don't know if it was related to diabetes or the fact that I wasn't moving my arm much do to the pain of the bone spurs.
Posted by: Becky | Jan 21, 2010 07:25 PM
Had this problem several times in both arm, Fortunately not at same time. Eventually disappeared in left arm. Right started some time after. I went swimming and forgot to be careful of using it. Hurt pretty bad at first but pain was diminished and mobility increasde as I continued swimming. No problem since. Worth a try.
Posted by: Don Shickle | Jan 20, 2010 06:48 PM
I have had it twice and both times were related to high blood glucose. Had the above mentioned lidocane or something similar some time ago. Now I have normal range of motion and no pain, and another good reason to keep my diabetes under tight control.
Posted by: Conrad G. Creitz | Jan 20, 2010 04:47 PM
Wow- Didn't think I'd ever see anything on one of my biggest frustrations after having survived with Type 1 diabetes for over 45 years now. Both of my shoulders are impacted and the limitations this causes can be "frustrating", to say the least. Watching me get into, or out of, a sport coat or suit jacket looks like someone trying to escape a straight jacket and can be extremely uncomfortable. Handing something to someone seated behind you is next to impossible also. When this condition first arose some relief came from having the shoulder joint treated with cortisone and then literally inflated with a sterile saline solution like a water balloon. The stretching this caused provided an extended period of relief and greater range of motion but over time the shoulder joint would eventually start to seize up again. The last time I tried to get relief from this condition it involved an attempt at minimally invasive surgery and the wearing of an extremely uncomfortable device that kept my arm raised upright for 21 days, and then followed by 6 weeks of excruciating rehabilitation that in the end provided me with little or no real relief. Since that time (1996) I've pretty well learned to live with this condition and until someone can tell me they've found some new, successful form of treatment I'll continue to do just that.
Posted by: James D.Taylor | Jan 20, 2010 03:55 PM
Yes, was bothered with pain and lack of range of motion. Brought it to the attention of my dr. and he diagnosed something-can't remember what-then his next diagnosis was torn rotator cuff and sent me to an ortho surgeon. After a few min. in the exam room he diagnosed frozen shoulder. Got injections of lidocane and kenalog along with 6 wks. of PT. Now free of the pain and range of motion is normal.
Posted by: Connie | Jan 20, 2010 04:09 PM
Yes, I get it, in my hips. It hurts...and my range of motion becomes severely limited. Was I diagnosed properly? No. Treated for the right condition? No. I researched for myself diabetes and joint pain, and figured out what it was and told my physiotherapist myself, he agreed and tried to treat it. Didn't help much, and some of the treatments hurt worse than I did normally. I would love to hear more about what helps. My hips are sooo stiff and sore at the moment!! Have been for awhile. But as you say above, it comes on for awhile and goes away for awhile (months of each).
Posted by: Heidi | Jan 24, 2010 04:10 PM
I had this problem with my shoulders to the point where I had to go buy a really soft mattress to get any sleep at all..... However it all disappeared in time when I finally discovered that keeping blood sugar levels as close to normal as possible made a lot of nasty things disappear -- it take take some time though. Even with my insulin, the start of a low carb diet made me a new person.
Posted by: John_C | Jan 29, 2010 12:14 AM
Had this problem in my right shoulder a few years ago; pain and limited motion. Cortisone shot and anti-inflamatory pills did not help. The condition improved to a great extend by PT and excercise.
Posted by: I. Rustom | Jan 29, 2010 11:24 PM
Have had a lot of trouble with joints. A1C is at 8.8...and that is down...so getting better. I have had 10 trigger fingers...frozen shoulder and now have stiffness in my hip joints. On Celebrex...not really helping a whole lot. getting back into exercise routine...hopefully it helps. My feet are sore....just feel pretty awful. EVERYTHING I have is diagnosed as complications of diabetes ... 21 years type 1. Just frustrated and feel bad. Hopefully this will improve with my dedication to put myself first....cholesterol is 154....but soft tissue damage is really taking a toll on my body!!!
Posted by: BGreen | Feb 07, 2010 11:47 AM
I also have frozen shoulder in my right shoulder and I feel this coming on in my left. I have had trigger finger in both hands and operations on both. I have a stiff right hip too. I am glad to have found this site, I thought all of this was just me. I will work very hard to get my a1c down. It is at 9.0 right now. I have had diabetes type 1 for 30 years and it sure is showing now. Thanks everyone for the advice and good luck to all of you.
Posted by: Dina | Jul 27, 2013 06:47 PM
Disclaimer of Medical Advice:You understand that the blogs posts and comments to such blog posts (whether posted by us, our agents, bloggers, or by users) do not constitute medical advice or recommendation of any kind and you should not rely on any information contained on such posts or comments to replace consultations with your qualified health care professionals to meet your individual needs. The opinions and other information contained in the blog posts and comments do not reflect the opinions or positions of the Site Proprietor.


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Select () or exclude () categories to narrow your recipe search.
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"This was my first time making - or even eating - crab cakes. I used 6 oz. of canned crab (Blasphemous, I know. But it's what I had.) and made 1/4 of the recipe, using a whole egg. I seasoned the mixture to taste with salt, pepper, garlic, onion powder, oregano, paprika, cayenne pepper. Because the mixture had more egg and was probably a littl..."
"I think this is probably the recipe my mom used for banana bread. It is credited elsewhere to Fannie Farmer. I must say I was kind of skeptical because the recipe didn't have milk or even cinnamon. But, now that I've tried making it myself, I'm seeing the charm in relying on banana, nuts, and sugar alone for the flavor. It's pr..."
"I haven't made this cake myself yet; but this is the recipe my mom had for pecan cake. I just found it tucked into one of her cookbooks. It's a really good cake; and this recipe appears to be the only one here that includes the glaze, which is one of the best parts of the cake. I will definitely be making this sometime, perhaps for my ow..."
"I've eaten this a few times, and I really like it. I make it 1/3 at a time; so, my measurements aren't exact. And I use a whole packet of Splenda. I've used varying amounts of banana in it. Even when they don't work out for me (usually because my frying pans aren't very non-stick), worst case scenario, I eat it as a porrid..."
"This is the first time I've ever used whole wheat flour, and I'm not sure if I made these right. I scaled the recipe down to three biscuits, just to give them a try. I think if I make them again, I'll add a little bit of sugar or Splenda. Thanks for the introduction to whole wheat baking!"
"Wow. I never thought that I could ever be impressed by oatmeal 'cause, let's face it, oatmeal is usually just not that impressive. But you have gone and done what I thought was impossible. This was really good. My only complaint is that the apples (I used honeycrisp.) were a bit too sour for me. Then again, I am very sensitive to sournes..."
"I made these today for the first time, and they were good. I only let them cook for about 15 minutes, and they were kind of flimsy, but that's the way I like fries. Thanks for the recipe!"
"This recipe is very good and mimics Rice a Roni very well. Next time I make it, I will break the spaghetti into smaller pieces, just to better mimic the original, not that it will make any difference in taste or anything. I attempted to make only half of this recipe and, as expected, ran into some issues with getting the rice and pasta done before..."
"I made this tonight, scaled down to fit a loaf pan, using one huge potato (about 3 cups sliced). I omitted the onion, reduced the salt by 75%, and reduced all of the other ingredients by 50%. Based on a previous review, I par-boiled the potato slices before I layered them. I added some extra cheese on top and baked the potatoes for 30 minutes. Thi..."
"Since we don't have tomato sauce or tomato paste, I made about 1 cup of this with 1/2 cup crushed tomatoes, 1/2 cup milk, 1/2 tbsp. sugar, a dash of garlic, and a few shakes of salt. My husband added more salt and about 1 tbsp. of margarine at the table. He liked it, and I did too (although the chunks of tomato from the crushed tomato were a ..."


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Vladimir Guerrero, the 37-year-old slugger who won the 2004 AL MVP and led the Angels to three AL West titles from 2007 to 2009, is a free agent again and is hoping to hear about his next opportunity for a major-league comeback.
I caught up with Guerrero on Saturday (June 16, 2012) at The OC Dugout in Anaheim, where he and Angels slugger Kendrys Morales, held an autograph session. Check out the column and the slide show from the event here.
Guerrero was released by the Toronto Blue Jays last week. He had been playing with the Triple-A Las Vegas 51s. He played last season with the Baltimore Orioles.
More from the Angels Blog: [rssfeedme cat="fromthedugout" feedpath="/category/angels/feed/" max="5"]
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Omaha Eppley Airfield airport. Share your experiences with others, or post a question and get notified when there is a response.
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free wifi that sucks... totally pointlessJun 27, 20141The free WiFi is worthless. My Asus tablet never has any issues at any other airport offering free service. Crappley Field ... Forget it. Keeps connecting and disconnecting ever 3 seconds. Actually caused my ultra reliable device to crash.sadFri, Jun 27
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Four Oaks, Family Resources Partner
CEDAR RAPIDS, IA (CBS 2/FOX 28) Two of Iowas leading child and family services organizations are now joining forces.
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The organizations say they want the partnership to create an even stronger organization to help better serve Iowas children and to be able to follow families enrolled in one or the other if they should move as so they can be with a child from now until their 18.
The partnership between Four Oaks and Family Resources will go into effect in July and will happen in stages over the next year.


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DIY Message Boards
Kitchen Cabinets not closing
This topic can be found at:
Dec 12, 2013, 10:24 AM
Kitchen Cabinets not closing
My wife and I just bought our first home and some of the cabinet doors do not shut properly. Not sure what the fix is here.
Dec 12, 2013, 10:31 AM
Are they wood? Are they out of alignment? Are the doors warped? Any idea how old they are?
Photos would help.
Dec 12, 2013, 12:07 PM
if those cabinets have European hinges (cabinet end fits in a large hole and snaps shut) there are two screws leading out from that fitting on the hinge assembly. I learned from trial and error on a donate-your-labor charity day that the screws are alignment adjustments. iirc the back screw predominantly adjusts how deep the hinge seats (door flush adjustment) and the front one is a skew adjustment (straight or crooked.) the two interact somewhat. smaller doors do not show the same amount of correction as large ones.
laying a strip of painters' tape across the door tops where they SHOULD close, and adjusting one door at a time for correct alignment with that door shut and the other open for access, is a faster way of learning how they work. less frustration that I had.
if those were prefab cabinets, you should be able to get them adjusted right. if they were hinged on site, it's possible the hole is dead wrong, and the hinge may need to be remounted in new screws on the door.
now, if those were NOT Euro hinges... you might have blown return springs hidden in the hinge (the tip is little plastic blocks someplace in the hings, which tension the screws, and have no adjustments other than to make things go SPROING! and lose the springs), or it could be the wrong hinges. I have accidentally picked the wrong hinges out of the bin at Big Cheeser's box store when somebody put the wrong reveal-depth in the wrong bin. compare the hinges with cabinets that do work. you might have to trek out into the cold and find more hinges.
This message has been edited. Last edited by:
Dec 12, 2013 12:11 PM
sig: if this is a new economy, how come they still want my old-fashioned money?
Dec 12, 2013, 04:32 PM
If Euro type hinges, what is the brand? I've had to replace quite a few of mine, but they do have a lifetime warranty and the manufacturer has been really good about sending me new ones. Now if they would just improve the darn design. The brand of mine is Blum. A small piece of black plastic breaks off inside the hinge and they no longer self close, they usually bind up until the plastic piece comes out of the hinge. Post back and if yours are Blum I'll try to dig out the information for you.
General Disclaimer
Any advice given here is general in nature and is not necessarily valid for your given area. If in doubt check with your local codes enforcement department for what is required when doing electrical, plumbing or structural work on your house. Permits may or may not be required in your area and home owners may not be able to DIY some tasks. I have no way of knowing if you have the skills needed to complete the tasks you are asking about, when in doubt seek professional assistance.
My advice may be worth exactly what you pay me for it. :-) For the record I did not stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.
Dec 13, 2013, 12:02 PM
we can not see your cabinets, there are literally hundreds of different types of clousers on cabnit doors..please upload a picture of the mis-behaving door, so that we might be able to see it and advise as to its punishment....thank you so very much..
there is more than one way to fix something
This message has been edited. Last edited by:
Dec 13, 2013 12:03 PM
Dec 13, 2013, 12:20 PM
And it could be that children or teenagers have spent a lot of effort leaning or putting their weight on the doors so that the hinges have gotten bent a little out of shape, then they need replacement. Careful examination is needed.
They make it look so easy on tv, don't they
Dec 13, 2013, 08:18 PM
some dont use the hinges to keep it open/closed they use a spring on the door at the handle
Jan 17, 2014, 01:13 AM
I think the problem their is those cabinets are not a line maybe you should re construct and so that you can see where is the problem on it.Last time i got also a same problem which lead me to a kitchen renovation which i hired a team at
and the fact that they are really doing it well now.
Mar 25, 2014, 10:39 AM
In case your cabinet is made of wood, it may be deformed because of humidity, so it is advisable to dry it properly.


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Teen mom Nicole Grier, with $500 in her pocket, hid Macy's merchandise in baby's stroller
Updated On: Mar 08 2013 03:14:08 PM EST
A new mom had $500 in her pocket when she tried to use her baby's stroller to hide merchandise that she intended to steal from a local Macy's store, police said.
Nicole Grier, 18, of Fort Lauderdale, was booked into the Palm Beach County Jail after allegedly trying to steal children's clothing while at the Town Center at Boca Raton store with a friend.
MUGSHOTS: Have You Seen Death Row's Female Faces?
According to the arrest report, Grier and her friend stole several items from the Polo and Nike sections of Macy's, and went into upstairs and downstairs changing rooms several times.
Loss-prevention officers told investigators they saw the women exit the changing rooms with fewer items than they entered with, the report said.
Grier told police that her friend picked her up at her home in Fort Lauderdale and that once they were at the mall, they decided they were going to use the baby stroller to conceal merchandise, according to the report.
Officers said they found $500 in cash on Grier, who admitted that she had planned to steal the concealed baby merchandise, but told officers that her friend intended to steal the other gear.
Grier now faces a charge of felony retail theft.
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Temperatures are dropping and it's time to think about keeping that belly warm. Snuggle up in some of our favorite cozy sweaters and coats.
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Where were you born?
I was born in Salem, Oregon.
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Casual reading, Sports (my favorites: Basketball and Tennis), Outdoorsy things (Hikes, Snowboarding, etc.), and Board Games with friends.
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Star Wars (stoked for Episode 7 to come out!), Lord of the Rings, Finding Nemo.
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John Mayer, Mat Kearney, The Fray, Colbie Caillat, and the Chris Mundell band!


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Cubs' Jeff Samardzija to start Opening Day
By GORDON WITTENMYER email@example.com March 3, 2013 11:19AM
Chicago Cubs' Jeff Samardzija throws before an exhibition spring training baseball game against the San Francisco Giants Sunday, Feb. 24, 2013, in Mesa, Ariz. (AP Photo/Morry Gash)
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Updated: March 3, 2013 12:20PM
MESA, Ariz. – It was probably the inevitable choice regardless, but when Matt Garza's latest setback eliminated the final doubt, Jeff Samardzija was named the Cubs' Opening Day starter by manager Dale Sveum on Sunday.
It's a career first for the former Notre Dame football star, who last season made a successful transition from bullpen pitcher to powerful starting pitcher – an angry one by Sept. 8 when he was shut down against his will because of an innings limit.
"For what he did that last eight starts, and in that last start in Pittsburgh, that's the kind of guy that's an Opening Day starter," Sveum said. "He's that guy you want out there, the guy that had that intensity [Sept. 8] knowing that was his last game."
Samardzija closed out a 2.58 second half with a complete game in Pittsburgh that night, striking out nine in a 4-3 victory.
"He's a guy that players rally around because of his work ethic, his bulldog mentality when he's on the mound,'' Sveum said. "It's an obvious choice really."


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Citizens Financial Group
Citizens Financial Group Interview Questions
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Interviews for Top Jobs at Citizens Financial Group
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Candidate Interview ReviewsSort: Popular Date Difficulty
- Application Details
I applied through a staffing agency. The process took 6+ weeks – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group.Interview Details
The easiest way to get hired is by applying through a staffing agency. The process from application to start date is about one and a half month. The staffing agency will contact and inform you of when to go for your interview at the contact center. My interview was done with two people. One asked the questions and the other took note of what I said. They asked a lot of questions but all of the questions were regular interview questions. No oddball or unexpected questions. Be prepared to give an example of a difficult situation at work.Interview Questions
Negotiation DetailsI did not negotiate because I thought the salary was good.Accepted OfferPositive Experience
- The most difficult question was giving an example of a challenging experience at my previous employment and how I handled it. Answer Question
- Application Details
I applied online. The process took 2 weeks – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group in October 2014.Interview Details
My current position is being eliminated and during a follow up call pertaining to another job interview, the hiring manager mentioned the Quality Control Manager Position was becoming available. I search on line and found the position. The hiring manager for the QCM position was involved in the initial interview and felt that a phone interview was appropriate. I interviewed with her and one other manager from her group.Interview Questions
No OfferPositive ExperienceAverage Interview
- What are the biggest risks you see facing the current CFG contracts. Answer Question
- Interview Details
Phone then face to face. Some interview with regional others with just the branch manager it's an easy process not very hard at all. The the the the the the the the the theyouAccepted Offer
- Application Details
I applied online. The process took 3+ weeks – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group in August 2014.Interview Details
Applied online, had one phone conversation with a recruiter in which we discussed salary, hours, and my resume. Had one in-person interview with the manager of the branch at which I would be working, and another interview a week later with the regional manage of CFG. I was called by a recruiter three days following the interview with the regional manager, and followed up with an offer letter via email. Within in a week from that, I did start up paperwork (all online) and got my fingerprints taken. Overall, the process was very easy and done mostly via email, which was convenient.Interview Questions
Negotiation DetailsI was able to negotiate on the salary, but only to a certain degree due to my lack of experience in the field.Accepted OfferPositive ExperienceAverage Interview
- What do you think this job is? Give me an example of what you think your daily tasks would be. View Answer
- Application Details
I applied through an employee referral. The process took 1+ week – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group.Interview Details
Had one interview with the BM and ABM. BM called back and told me next steps to follow with human resources. Process was easy. Overall process took approx 10 days. Salary was told to me and growth was discussed at interview, though it never happened during my career with this company. Looking back I feel that I was fooled during the interview to what the job was really like.Interview Questions
Negotiation DetailsThey told me the pay and I couldn't neg because I didn't have previous banking experienceAccepted OfferPositive ExperienceAverage Interview
- What experience do you have with being turned down in sales. Answer Question
- Interview Details
Was contacted by a recruiter 4 weeks after I applied for the job. She was very nice and forwarded my resume to the branch manager. He called me a few days later to set up an interview. After we already had a date selected for the interview, I get an email saying I was not selected and the process was over. Was never contacted by anyone. This company is unprofessional, their recruiters are lazy, and I dodged a bullet.Interview Questions
No OfferNegative Experience
- What does Citizens suck so much? Answer Question
- Application Details
I applied through an employee referral. The process took 4+ weeks – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group.Interview Details
takes a month or so due to fingerprinting, mostly there are 2 interviews sometimes 3, they often have job fairs, stop by any branch and ask when the next one is. You can apply on line.Interview Questions
Accepted Offer
- I cant remember a difficult question Answer Question
- Application Details
The process took 2+ weeks – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group.Interview Details
Initial interview was with a branch manager with a very standard interview guide. I answered situational questions. About a week later, I interviewed with the retail director for the market. 2 hours after the interview, the recruiter called me to offer the position.Interview Questions
Negotiation DetailsNo negotiations were made.Accepted OfferPositive ExperienceEasy Interview
- "Tell me about a time you had to coach an employee to reach goals..." Answer Question
1 person found this helpfulApplication Details
I applied online. The process took 3+ months – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group in June 2014.Interview Details
I applied online directly to their website. I heard back from an HR representative the following week. She was extremely nice and friendly. We chatted for a while and setup my phone interview. I had the phone interview about a week or two later. It went very well and I heard back from HR the following day saying they really liked me and would like me come in for an interview. They said they would be in touch with me with details. After two weeks of not hearing anything I reached out to the HR manager. She informed me that they would reach out to me when ready. I waited a few more weeks before being contact for an interview, which I eventually received. My interview went great and I expected to hear back from them, which I did the following day from HR. They told once again the Manager really enjoyed speaking with me and they were definitely bringing me in for another interview, but still needed to interview others for their first time. After two weeks I reached out again and was told i would hear back when ready. Every 2 weeks I emailed the HR manager asking for an update. After about 2 1/2 months of being in the interview process (from first contact) i heard back from the HR manager for my final interview. I went in and met with 3 different people, including the hiring manager, someone on that team, and the hiring manager's manager. Everything went well and they said I would hear back the following week. After the week went by and I never heard back I reached out to the HR manager. They said it would probably be another week before they knew. So i waited TWO more weeks and followed up again after - this time with the HR manager AND the hiring manager. I eventually heard back to my email a week later from only the hiring manager. She said they already hired someone else a few weeks ago. She said i was high on their list but went with someone with a little more experience.
Overall this was OVER a the 3 MONTH interview process! Personally I think that's insane. The fact they never communicated with me they hired someone else, especially for having three interviews and getting to the final round was completely unprofessional and uncourteous to say the least. Coming from one of the largest Banks in the United States it is easy to see why we reign supreme over these smaller regional banks. If thats they way they treat potential employees I can't imagine they treat their potential customers any better.Interview Questions
No OfferNegative ExperienceAverage Interview
- If you have two sets of data pulled from the same source, how can their be two different stories for the data. View Answer
- Application Details
I applied online. The process took 3+ months – interviewed at Citizens Financial Group in June 2014.Interview Details
I was contacted by the internal recruiter and had a phone interview with the hiring manager. We were both excited by the possibility of my joining the group. It then went into a black hole and only after persistent followup with the internal recruiter did I learn that the position had been put on hold.Interview Questions
No OfferNegative ExperienceEasy Interview
- There were other opportunities at Citizens that I was interested in, but I was unsure how to proceed because of the uncertainty surrounding the first position. On the one hand, I didn't want to upset the hiring process for the first position - if it were still in play - but on the other hand, I didn't want to let an opportunity slip by, which would have been bad for both me and the Citizens. Further complicating matters, I didn't know the underlying reason why they were suddenly not interested in filling the first position - and whether that reason could also impact the other positions. Answer Question
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Price: $33.49
Product ID : 208-BMTH
Manufacturer: Berger Bullets
Shipping Weight: 3.00 lbs
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Berger Match Target Hybrid Bullets - Flat Rate Shipping*
The Hybrid design blends two common bullet nose shapes on the front section of the bullet (from the tip to the start of the bearing surface). Most of the curved section of the bullet has a Secant (VLD-style) ogive for low drag. This then blends in a Tangent-style ogive curve further back, where the bullet first contacts the rifling. The Tangent section makes seating depth less critical to accuracy, so the Hybrid bullet can shoot well through a range of seating depths, even though it has a very high Ballistic Coefficient (BC). Great for both the competative and recreational shooters.
Check out our full Berger line of Target, Varmint, and Hunting bullets at our Berger Bullets Home Page. Sorry, bullets and ammunition are not returnable for safety reasons.
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