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Friday, November 21, 2014
"To my fellow Americans...and those of you who soon will be."
Most of you hopefully know that our President, Brock O'Bama, delivered a speech live on Univision last night. He picked Univision, rather than ABC, CBS, NBC and MSPMS because he really didn't want the "pay-no-attention-until-it-hurts-my-wallet" voters to know much about it.
What few know, however, is that Mr. O'Bama had two speeches readied for this fateful announcement. And I, the Chuckmeister, having special "inside" sources that few others enjoy, which have guaranteed me that this is true, have managed to obtain a copy of it.
One, the "wimpy" speech, is the one he chose to give. He wimped out, just as he did with his famous "red line" warning to Syria. And his unilateral removal of rockets from Ukraine. And his half-hearted "war" against ISIS/ISIL/Islamic State or whatever they choose to call it. He's pretty wimpy, this guy.
But the other speech, the one he really wanted to give, I'm told, but didn't, is worth reviewing, because it shows what he really thinks and what he really feels. And children, we shall review that speech forthwith:
* * * * *
"To my fellow Americans...and those of you who soon will be."
"As you've no doubt heard, I come to you wonderful Latinos tonight to announce a sweeping overhaul of our proud nation's broken immigration system. I say "Latinos," because the Alphabet Networks aren't covering this, and almost nobody else is paying attention, because they're watching football, or some other waste of time TV show, and the Lap Dog Media will keep this whole thing pretty much under wraps, except for that goddam Fox News, and I'm on just before the Latin Grammys kick off, and it's Mexican Revolution Day, so the voters won't really know what happened here tonight. Except for you and me, that is. 'Heh, heh."
"Yes, I've said on multiple occasions that I have no authority to make the changes I shall announce here tonight. Yes, they're unconstitutional. But hey, I don't have to run for reelection again, and while I still have some degree of power before my "Lame Duck" status really kicks in, and because I don't really care if what I do is illegal, I asked myself, "Why not go big?" After all, the feckless Republicans can't do much about it without risking the media coming after them, which would alienate the low-information voters, and the Democrat Party, which I've almost single-handedly destroyed, needs some serious help, so really, my friends, what do I have to lose? So, going BIG is what I'm hereby going to do."
"Rather than simply "nationalizing" 4 or 5 million of your brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, grandfathers and grandmothers, and your little nephews with all those "MS-13" tattoos on their foreheads by simply choosing not to deport them, I'm going the "Full Monte." As of tonight, I'm granting full amnesty to everybody in Africa, in Asia, in Europe, in South America and even in the Antarctic. Everybody."
"You may now break into America without fear that those troublesome border patrol guys will try and ruin your travel experience. And God knows, we wouldn't want to do that. After all, you either are, or soon will be Undocumented Democrats, so treating you really, really well so you know how to properly vote ("wink-wink") is high on my list of priorities."
"So after tonight, you'll be able to get a real Social Security Number, not the one you've been illegally using, a Green Card, a drivers' license, Obamacare, welfare, some help with the old apartment rent thing and a free Rosetta Stone program so you can learn English should you really want to. But you won't actually have to, because before long, once the border surge occurs, most of your neighbors will be speaking Spanish anyway. As a matter of fact, part of this Executive Order is that all phones in America will now be required to announce, "Press 2 for English.' "
"But part of this whole deal is that you will be absolutely required to go straight to Texas, or Oklahoma, or Kansas, or Arizona, or Utah, or Idaho, because hey, those states have plenty of room, and they're, ahem, RED, and we need to turn them purple, at the very least, and preferably a very bright BLUE. I personally recommend Texas, because that Perry guy isn't one of my favorite people, and Governor Jan Brewer in Arizona could use some more residents sporting your particular skin color, if you know what I mean, just in case you're interested."
"We want you here. We love you. And thanks for mowing our lawns, wet-nursing our kids and washing our cars all these years. We hope to start repaying you...the Democrat Party does, that is, starting tonight."
"So, in closing, I'm making tacos the Official Food at the White House. Margaritas will now be decreed the Official Drink of the United States, and all you Latinos will get an extra five points on your civil service exams when you apply for work at the Post Office. But work, of course, will remain optional."
"Thank you for voting for me and my Democrat friends and helping to elect me in previous elections, and God Bless Estados Unidos!"
* * * * *
That's the speech that El Jefe really wanted to deliver, I'm led to believe, but didn't. The wimp. But now you know what he preferred you to know. Perhaps he'll man-up and someday do his Tele-PrompTer thing and read the real speech to you himself.
But until then, the Chuckmeister will keep you up to date on all the comings and goings as it relates to immigration reform here in what used to be America.
After all, if I don't tell you, who will?
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 4:47 PM No comments: Links to this post
Sunday, November 16, 2014
Today, my friends, we're going to talk about a new measure of time. One I've just conjured up. You know, the way we determine how much time has passed, or is going to pass. Like eon. Or year. Like month, or week, or day. Like hour, or minute, or second. Even a piece of a second, like a "nanosecond," which is, well, pretty damn small.
To these, children, we will now add another. One that should be used frequently in our present day society, which is managed all too often by those who are just dead-set, tremblingly, feverishly dead-set, on removing our guns from our hands, cold and dead, or not...
Gunaway: (Gun-a-way). Noun. The smallest measure of time between some crazed terrorist asshole engaging in a mass shooting somewhere, and a commie drone doofus gun-hating lefty calling for unconstitutional enhanced gun control measures.
Yes, "gunaway." That's the amount of time it takes for the Dinosaur Media, or a member of our Fearless Leader's Administration, or the Democrat National Committee, or Media Matters for America, or MoveOn.org, or Jessuh Jackson, or Politico, or the Huffington Post, or Joe "Plugs" Biden, or Little Mikey Bloomberg, or Porky Mikey Moore, or George ("the Nazi") Soros, or MSNBC, or anyone else who cares to opine, to call for new, expanded, improved, or enlarged gun control measures designed to disarm Americans after somebody somewhere starts shooting in a crowded place.
Not "knifing" in a crowded place. That's happened quite a bit lately. Or as happened recently on a New York City street, "hatcheting" in a crowded placed. Just shooting.
While the acrid smell from burnt gunpowder was still wafting through the hallowed halls of Ottawa's famed Capitol building, MSNBC's empty suit talking heads were heard calling for enhanced gun control laws. That was their "gunaway."
Rosie "The Mouth" O'Donnell called for increased gun control in less than an hour. Her "gunaway." Did I mention that Rosie has a bevy of armed guards protecting her bloated ugly body?
And recently, a disaffected teenager wishing to go out in a blaze of glory shot up the cafeteria in a Marysville, Washington, high school, killing three, and critically wounding one other kid. The "gunaway" on the Internet for this evil act was a little as 20 minutes. Not to pile on to MSNBC again, but hey, I can, because they are so "pile-on-able." Their no-talent airhead host Joy Reid began calling for increased gun control 35 minutes into the attack (their coverage of the shooting started at 11:25 a.m. PDT, and her screeching for more gun-grabbing started at 11:50 a.m.). As Rahm Emmanuel so famously stated a couple of years back, "Never let a crises go to waste." She didn't, and they aren't.
What glue holds all of these nefarious events together. They were all Gun Free Zones!
How about New York Governor Andrew Cuomo's "gunaway" following the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School? Less than 24 hours. That's how long it took him to round up the lefty loons in the New York legislature in Albany and pass the "Safe Act." That little piece of Lefty Logic, which made only the criminals "safe," turned the 2nd Amendment on its ear in New York State. Got a so-called "assault rifle?" Turn it in. Got a pistol or rifle magazine that holds more than 7 rounds? Turn it in. It's now illegal. Want to buy a gun in New York? Good luck.
So, out of about 500,000 "assault rifle" owners in New York, less than 3,000 showed up to register their already registered guns. The others are now felons. And they just gave the finger to Governor Cuomo by refusing to knuckle under to his B.S. law. Oh, and his little 7-round magazine limit? It made all the magazines in all his Highway Patrol, Sheriffs' Department and Police Department officers' handguns felons, as all of their pistol magazines hold at least 10 rounds.
No gun manufacturer on Earth makes a gun magazine that holds only 7 rounds!
This guy is some special sort of dumbass, isn't he?
Oh, I should also mention that while New York State is advertising every few minutes on every cable channel that companies should seriously consider moving there, and by doing so pay no taxes for ten years as a result, every single gun manufacturer is moving out!
Every hear of Remington? Of Ithaca? Those two famous gun makers are way over 100 years old. They have begun the process of pulling up stakes and moving to more favorable climes. Down south, they're going, where the people in charge can actually read, and therefore understand, the 2nd Amendment to the Constitution of the United States.
When you elect a dumbass liberal weenie governor, you get dumbass liberal weenie laws. And so far, Cuomo has presided over the loss of more than 3,000 jobs in New York State. Did you hear about that on MSNBC? Or NBC, CBS, ABC or PBS No? I wonder why (cough, cough)?
Oh, and let's not fail to mention Buffalo. Buffalo's gunaway is about two days. That's the amount of time it now takes the "authorities" in Buffalo to visit the home of a newly-deceased gun owner and demand that the surviving spouse hand over the weapons. No reimbursement necessary. No warrant required. Let me in. Hand them over. I'm not kidding. I wish I were.
Back to "gun free zones." Those calling for enhanced gun control measures don't seem to understand that people with a proclivity to shoot up the neighborhood don't ordinarily follow the rules of society. Think about it, folks. Killing a bunch of strangers is, well, illegal! They think that criminals will see a sign outlawing their impending activity and say to themselves, "Uh oh, no guns here!" I guess I'll go home and get my trusty Louisville Slugger." They seem to think that more and better laws will keep those who don't follow the 20,000 anti-gun laws already on the books, will somehow have the light bulb go "on" and suddenly become law-abiding. As in, "Who me?" Shoot up a school? Oh no, not me! I'll go to the library and check out a book instead." Who knows? Maybe they're right. And just maybe unicorns will begin dancing to a Cole Porter tune on the White House Rose Garden lawn...
Or, maybe the billionaires with armed bodyguards, who are donating millions of dollars to run ads advocating increased gun control laws, who have decided that the 100,000,000 Americans who own more than 300,000,000 guns will decide to follow the lead of commie pinko dumbass liberal weenies and cough up their firearms to comply with the Politically Correct Crowd.
Or, maybe not.
In the meantime, observe the happenings for yourself. Keep track of the "gunaways" when next a lefty terrorist kills some nice folks. And ask yourself, "How much better would it have been if a good guy with a concealed weapon was nearby and ready, willing and able to drop the bad guy like a bad habit and bring the massacre to a quick and successful close?"
Just for the record, according to the FBI's 2012 statistics, the average number of deaths by gun in mass shootings where there's no "good guy with a gun" nearby to thwart it, is 12.7. The average when the "good guy" is around, is 2.1. Which number do you like the best?
Still not convinced? A terrorist shot up the Ottawa capitol a few weeks back. The Sergeant-at-Arms pulled his Glock and dropped him forthwith. He shot dead an unarmed soldier at point blank range. The "Bad Guy With a Gun" then began looking for more victims before being shot dead by a "Good Guy With a Gun." Now let me hear from some of you gun-haters out there just how much better off our friends up north would be if there were no guns in this "gun-free zone."
Ever wonder why bad guys pick "gun free zone" schools for their evil deeds? I wonder why you never hear of a gun show or a police station getting shot up. If guns kill people, how is it that people get out of gun shows alive? Have you got it yet?
Oh, and then go out and buy a gun, learn how to use it safely and effectively, and then take responsibility for your defense and the defense of those good people around you.
Because remember, my friends, when seconds count, the police are only minutes away...
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 10:04 AM No comments: Links to this post
Monday, November 10, 2014
From Cuba, With Love...
The tens of you who follow this little blog of mine will remember my posting of November 6th, 2008. I wrote:
"Last night I went to bed in Northern Mexico and woke up this morning in France."
That was a bad morning for me. And for about half of America. The election was over. And for me and that half, we all lost. I recall thinking that the only ones happy about it at the time were those who didn't have America's best interests at heart. And who wanted something from America, not for America. And for those who wanted to cut America down to size. To embarrass her. And to minimize her importance. And influence. And to sully her history. Like Obama when he went on his World Apology Tour. I was depressed for quite some time. Still am, to a degree.
But the morning after this election I awakened with a new sense of hope. I was exhilarated. Freedom was returning to our beloved country. Call it "hope and change" for real. As in, I "hope" this socialistic crap is finally close to over and the "change" we need is on the way. The Republican Party had just won a decisive battle and sent the Democrat candidates packing. Thumped 'em, we did, this past Tuesday. Buried them. In the aftermath, Barry Obama said, derisively, that "...the Republicans had a good night." Hmmm. Ya' think?
That, my friends, is called damning something with faint praise. However, it was, as Senator Joe Manchin of West Virginia so eloquently put it, a real "ass whoopin." Yes, it was. And it was glorious.
By the way, I predict that Mr. Manchin disavows his commie lefty weenie tendencies and begs the conservative majority to allow him to join its little ruling party. Just guessing. But watch and see. I think I'll be proven right.
I had also predicted in these pages a year or so ago that I expected the Republicans to win 8 Senate seats and 9 House seats in this just-completed election. As of Wednesday morning, the Republicans had taken down 7 Senate seats with two others very likely to follow suit in the next few weeks (Alaska and Louisiana). And the House picked up 13 new members, making it the most "Red" it has been since Harry Truman was in office. Not since 1946 has there been so many Republican House members. And it's likely that they will have the majority for generations to come.
Maybe I had some small part in helping this to happen by asking those who had no idea which direction is up, who believed all that "hoppanchange" crap, to "Just Stay Home on Election Day." Maybe, just maybe.
So one could reasonably say that I'm prescient. You know, like, I am able to foretell the future. And I did. Yes indeedy, I did.
So, now the reason for this posting. I would be remiss in my duties to my several avid followers if I didn't do a follow-up to my six-years-ago downer of a statement. So, here goes:
"Last night I went to bed in Cuba and woke up this morning in France."
France. Not great, but not Cuba, either. We had devolved to "Cuba" since Barry had been ensconced at the helm. A long, painful, downward spiral that had pretty much hit bottom somewhere just south of Havana. The Government had taken control of our lives to a degree never before experienced. It was telling us what to wear, what to drive, what to eat (thanks, Mooooochelle), how much we should earn, and what health insurance that we were required by law to purchase (!). Every little aspect of our puny lives had been subsumed by the Government. And it was due to get worse. Much worse.
And then the election happened. And the Great Plan of the Progressive Elite was derailed. We Won! Yeah!
In the aftermath just-fired Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid looked like he needed an overdose of Pepcid. Heavily Botoxed San Fran Nan Pelosi looked poleaxed. Even more than normal. Like she didn't really understand what had just happened (did anyone get the license plate number of that truck?) Glorious, as I said.
So, back to France. Not America, yet, but far better than a miserable hovel in Havana. But those who reside in "redder" climes than Taxifornia may be in far better shape than me and my fellow "Blue Island" prisoners. The Red Wave seems to always stop at the Sierra Nevada, never managing to make its way over the mountain top to our prettiest and most compelling state. Oh, and the dumbest, most Progressive, poorest managed, least rational, most overtaxed state in the union.
But with any luck at all, with any sort of forward progress made by the New Majority in Congress, we'll get a chance to return from socialist Pa-ree and get back to America as it was. And could be once again.
God, I hope so...
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 7:54 AM 2 comments: Links to this post
Friday, October 31, 2014
"...Just Stay Home on Election Day."
As I write this, it is just three days before the Election.
Three days from now some small fraction of Americans will trundle on down to the voting places and cast their ballots.
A small fraction, I say, because historically less than 25% of the electorate does the choosing for the rest of us. 25%!
Would you feel comfortable letting a quarter of your neighbors choose your next new car? That's assuming you could actually afford a new car, which is a really big assumption these days.
But our choice is much more important than that. Much more. That's why it's absolutely critical that those who don't know what they're doing, have no friggin' idea what's happening around them, those dimbulbs who believe the crap that comes out of the mouths of politicians as a matter of rote, should just stay home on Election Day. "Why," you might ask? Okay, the Chuckmeister will tell you...
Those who haven't noticed that that the ten-year war we won in Iraq at the cost of 4,403 brave Americans has now been lost by our Golfer-in-Chief, and that some terrorists there are beheading our citizens on YouTube for sport, should just stay home on Election Day.
That bunch who think that Benghazi was a character actor back in the 50's, and who probably think that Salmonella was a buddy of his who played a mob enforcer in "The Godfather," should - pretty please - just stay home on election day.
Those who haven't noticed that our southern border is in chaos, with thousands of illegals pouring over every day, should just stay home on Election Day. Those who haven't been paying attention to Russian aggression, the annexation of Ukraine and the replay of the Cold War should JSHOED (Just Stay Home on Election Day).
And those who don't know that 62,000,000 Americans are now out of the work force, that our Labor Force Participation Rate is now the lowest its been in the last 39 years, that our unemployment rate is closer to 14% than the Administration-approved lie of 6.7%, that Black unemployment is up more than 35% since Barry assumed the Throne, and an alarming percentage of new college graduates are living in their parents' basements because they can't get a job, should JSHOED.
Similarly, those who don't know that Ebola has arrived in America, despite our Community Organizer-in-Chief's promise and guarantee that it wouldn't, and that it just might kill us all, should JSHOED.
Those who didn't notice that our corporate tax rate went from 35 to 39.6%, the very highest in the World, making us totally uncompetitive with every other country, and that our Death (inheritance) Tax went from ZERO to 55% should JSHOED.
The numbskull bunch that haven't noticed that the XL Keystone Pipeline, after having been approved by five separate State Department reviews over a six-year period as absolutely safe and necessary, has still not been approved by Obama, should JSHOED. And those who also didn't know that this Pipeline would create 800,000 new barrels of North American oil every day, 20,000 new UNION jobs, over $8 Billion in new economic activity to the involved states, further cement our friendship with our great friend Canada, and make us completely energy-independent from the creeps in the Middle East who want us dead, should...you got it...JSHOED.
Those who also don't know that Obama hates the 2nd Amendment and is on video for all to see proclaiming that Americans should never be allowed to own guns, should JSHOED.
Those who don't know just how little he values our military, and proves it every time he's given the chance, should JSHOED.
Those who were sipping Chenin Blanc and couldn't be bothered to notice that Bibi Netanyahu, Prime Minister of the only democracy in the Middle East, and our great friend, was called a "chickenshit" by a member of Barry's Bunch, and then had that comment doubled down on by another highly-placed sycophant, should probably JSHOED.
Need more? Okay. Those who haven't noticed that this President has doubled our Federal Debt, from $9.6 Trillion to almost $18 Trillion, should definitely JSHOED.
And those who don't know that this President, and his Maxi-me Attorney General, slow-walked thousands of "assault weapons" to Mexican drug cartels, paid for by you and me, in an illegal scam known as "Fast and Furious," and caused the death of Brian Terry, our brave border guard, should - Please God! - JSHOED.
And in conclusion, those who make it their business to stay up on the news and are painfully aware of all the foregoing facts, unlike the brain dead drones mentioned above, are deathly afraid for the future of our beloved Country, should make it a point to vote on November 4th for a return to sanity. And, to work their very hardest to insure that their friends and family do so as well. This may be our last chance to save what's left of America.
Let's keep our fingers crossed...
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 12:07 PM No comments: Links to this post
Thursday, October 23, 2014
It's the salt air, stupid!
Take a look at a map of good ol' Estados Unidos. I mean from the top down.
You'll note that there's a string of deep blue states stretching all the way from Washington State south on the left, through to and including California, and then from upper New England on the right, all the way south down to Mid-Atlantic Maryland. It continues again around Miami, but hey, no surprise there; Miami is made up of transplanted New Yorkers in galoshes and mink coats who brought their leftiness with them.
These states are, and have been, run by Democrats since God only knows when. One could reasonably ask, "Why?"
And then be aware that, with a few notable exceptions, almost all the states in between these deep blue wonders are a vibrant shade of vermilion "red." These are the states that are quite well managed by Republicans, thank you very much. Quite well. They produce the most jobs and the most tax revenues while having the lowest tax rates and the least onerous regulatory burdens. And one could reasonably ask, "Why?" Why do the red states work so well and the blue states perform so badly?
Well, children, I think I have the answer:
Salt air!
Yes, my friends, salt air. The major population centers in these bluest-of-blue states are within about 50 miles from their respective coastlines. Think about it. San Diego. Los Angeles. Santa Monica. San Francisco. Portland. Seattle. Boston. New York City. Philadelphia. Baltimore. Washington, D. C. All are within 50 miles of their nearby oceans.
And what are oceans? Oceans are huge bodies of water rich in what? Salt! And what does salty water do? It corrodes stuff. It fills the air above it. That sticky, wet, car-rusting, ozone-rich smell that people choose to live near the ocean for is the culprit. I'm sure of it. And what do doctors tell you to do? They tell you to stay away from salt! It's not good for you, they say. Assuming they know what they're talking about, that is. And that's an assumption I'm not prepared to make, by the way. We know that doctors kill more than 700,000 Americans each year due to misdiagnosis and/or malpractice. Guns only kill about 36,000, and two-thirds of that number are due to suicide. Clearly, guns are much, much safer than doctors. Should we have to have a permit to go see a doctor? Maybe so. But they say salt is bad for us, and, if so, salt air must be just awful!
Why don't people from Bozeman, Montana do crazy, dumbass things like promise to pay their retirees more than they can possibly generate from their sky-high taxes? Why don't people from Salina, Kansas pass laws disarming their populace by outlawing guns so that their criminals have a less hostile work environment? Why don't the managers of Oklahoma City declare their burg to be a "sanctuary city" so that illegal aliens don't have to constantly be looking over their shoulders for John Law? Why don't the good folks in Omaha vote to raise the minimum wage of their entry-level, pimply-faced teenage workforce by, oh, I don't know, let's say double, just to incur favor with a group of slackers who can't manage to earn a decent living for themselves, and may not even turn out to vote Deep Blue the next time around?
Well, my friends, the salty-air cities on either coast do these absolutely absurd things. Santa Monica recently voted to not only raise its minimum wage to $15 an hour, it passed laws requiring its employers to offer healthcare to their workers, including even its part-timers. S.M.'s city fathers and mothers (and, given that it's California, ahem, others) gave no consideration to the pure hell they were putting their business owners through. They just did it, because, how shall I say it, they're commie pinko dumbass Liberal weenies! And, they can!
Their doing so also resulted in an almost overnight increase in the room rates of their hotels of more than 20%. And it resulted in a concomitant reduction in the number of rooms rented.
Their doing so resulted in a $5.00 Mickey D's combo meal now costing $7.60. And, it resulted in a reduction in the number of Happy Meals being ordered, and thus, the sales and profits of MickeyD's.
Their doing so resulted in dozens and dozens of small to mid-size, tax-paying companies to bolt this Liberal Paradise. I guess the good residents of Santa Monica can afford to pay those prices. But tourism has most certainly been negatively affected among those of us who cannot. Maybe Santa Monica can get along without tourists. And then again, maybe it can't.
As in all things, the Law of Unintended Consequences still holds sway. You try and screw with the laws of economics and you get bitten in the ass. Except, they don't care. They're Liberals, don't you know. And Liberals, by any measure, are mentally ill. They need help, folks, but they just don't know it, and I fear they never shall.
There's an old saying: "When you rob Peter to pay Paul, you're pretty certain to have Paul's full and undying support."
So, my friends, if you're given the choice, make it a point to live nowhere near the oceans. They'll corrupt you into doing dumbass things from which you'll never recover. And even if you stay sane, the people you elect are sure to work overtime to ruin your life. You're going to be rowing upstream your whole life while the good people of Chillicothe, Missouri will be clipping coupons and lazing comfortably on their BarcaLoungers. You. Have. Been. Warned!
You're welcome.
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 11:01 AM 2 comments: Links to this post
Saturday, October 18, 2014
Misusing, and Abusing, our Military
It took us ten years to win the Iraq War. Ten Years! Actually, it shouldn't have taken that long. It's just that we changed Commanders-in-Chief in mid-stream and the new one, B. Hussein Obama, wanted nothing to do with it.
Nothing, we now know, to the extent that he refused...for more than six months...the requests of his commanders and generals to send sixty thousand additional troops to Iraq in the form of a "surge." He was asked for sixty thousand. The military experts told him it would take that many to finally win the war. After six months he agreed, reluctantly, very reluctantly, to send thirty thousand. Thirty's pretty close to sixty, right? Well, no it isn't. But under the new Common Core standards, perhaps 30 and 60 are about the same.
And those thirty thousand, together with the 120,000-or-so soldiers and Marines who were already there was enough to tip the balance in favor of the U.S. of A. We won. Finally. Thankfully.
The Iraq War cost us the lives of 4,503 brave soldiers. War-fighters. They gave their all for this country, and for their brother soldiers. And we treasure their sacrifice.
And another 40,000+ Americans were grievously wounded in that War. Those brave men and women are currently trying to repair and restart their lives after having written a check to America, payable with an amount of up to and including their lives. Thank God for the Wounded Warriors Project. At least they are helping to mend our finest.
But we won. Thank God! Our guys and gals kicked their asses and we prevailed. All that remained was to leave a peace-keeping force behind and come on home.
But along comes Obama. He didn't much care for the Iraq War. He campaigned against it. It was the "bad war," he said. Afghanistan, on the other hand, was the "good war." That's the one he liked. Not the other one. So it was no big surprise that he screwed the pooch when time came to negotiate a "Status of Forces Agreement," or SOFA, with Iraq's Prime Minister Malicki, so that we could maintain a stabilizing, "trip-wire" force there after our departure. Exactly, you'll recall, like we did in South Korea, West Germany, Italy and Japan. They're still there, in fact. More than 120,000 in all. Standard stuff. Unless you're a Big-City Liberal skinny ideologue lawyer like Obama.
Malicki wanted 23,000 soldiers. Obama offered 3,000. That was an insult, and was taken as such by Malicki. And Obama wanted Iraq's Parliament to vote on the SOFA. Malicki said, "No, leave it to me and I'll handle it." Obama, sensing he'd snookered Malicki, said "No" and proceeded with the evacuation.
So he pulled out all our troops in 2010 and the Bad Guys have been drawn into the vacuum we created. Like flies to a pile of you-know-what. So much so that we went from a stable, friendly ally in Iraq to now facing the specter of ISIS, or IFIL, or the Islamic State, or HAMAS, or whatever you/he/they choose to call it/themselves today.
Reluctantly, Obama agreed to actually "do something" about these killers when they started beheading our citizens. I guess the weenies who inhabit the bowels of the White House whispered in his ear between golf outings and mentioned to him just how pissed the American people were at watching this outrage on YouTube.
And his "something" turned out to be an occasional air strike from an F-16. From 20,000 feet. Yeah, that'll work.
So they're taking town after town, well on their way to occupying Iraq as an Islamic caliphate. As of this writing they're within a few miles of downtown Baghdad. What can the Golfer-in-Chief do about it? Well, he could do as his generals advise and send 40,000 troops back to Iraq. He could do that, but he won't. That's because he doesn't want to appear to have blown it real bad by precipitously pulling them out in the first place. No "boots on the ground," he says. And I guess he means it. Ballet slippers, maybe, but no boots. Of course, he's lied to us repeatedly about so many things over such a long period of time that one can never be sure when he means it, or about what.
Obama, you magnificent poseur, you'll go down in history as the only U.S. president to actually lose a war we'd already won. Go play another round of golf. You've earned it.
But now, we find ourselves in the middle of another feces storm. It's called Ebola. It's just about the nastiest, killingest virus in the world, and it's come to America. Confined largely to West Africa for decades, it's made it way across the Atlantic and landed in Dallas. Obama said it wouldn't happen. Yeah, right. Another lie.
So instead of acting when he could have, and should have, by sending teams of medical professionals to the Dark Continent, he waited until it's in all likelihood too late. I wonder if his response would have been the same if Patient Zero had landed at Dulles instead of Dallas.
So, not knowing what he doesn't know (a common failing of Libbies), our Vacationer-in-Chief has decided - ready for it? - to send up to 4,000 American military troops to West Africa to fight Ebola! Soldiers. Fighting a virus.
Actually, I hear his plan is to have our (probably unarmed) soldiers and Marines build hospitals and direct traffic and maintain quarantines and break up fistfights in an effort to minimize Ebola's spread. Picture it: Uniformed soldiers, trained to fight bad guys, fighting a virus. Not fighting ISIS, or ISIL, or the Islamic State (even though Mr. Obama guarantees us it isn't Islamic!), but a virus.
Oh, I should mention that the Department of Defense just named our military action in Iraq. We have to name these actions, you see, because we just do. If we don't the Defense Department gets their panties all in a wad. This one is now named "Inherent Resolve." Huh? When does resolve become inherent? There's been no resolve in this Administration up to now, so we know it can't be inherent.
But wait, just like the late-night infomercial, there's even more! Just yesterday our Vacationer-in-Chief signed an executive order authorizing the Department of Defense to call up our National Guard and Ready Reserve to the tune of up to 4,000 additional troops. That's because, he said, it might take too long to mobilize our active duty military and get them deployed to West Africa.
Why would it take too long? After pink-slipping nearly 100,000 active duty military due to sequestration and almost $1,000,000,000,000 (that's One Trillion Dollars!) of Defense Department cutbacks, he's calling up the reservists because, I believe, there's not enough active duty military to send on this unicorn hunting trip. Active duty military personnel aren't trained to fight viruses, of course. They're trained to kill bad guys. But they're not being permitted to do that. And reservists, who are Wal-Mart managers, lumber yard workers and Verizon cable system installers are even less well trained. So they're the people our Insurance Salesman-in-Chief wants to send on this one-way trip to oblivion. And, get this: They'll receive four whole hours of training!
Is this the very height of insanity? Is this the absolute dumbest thing an America president ever did? In the entire history of our country? Ever?
I think so.
Now, they'll go over there, unprotected, untrained, unable to know what to do and what not to do, and likely get infected. And they'll be pissed at being so monumentally misused by the President they have sworn to follow. And then they'll bring the virus back home with them. And infect their families and friends. I predict that enlistments into our military, Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force and the Coast Guard, will drop like a stone. And why should they do anything else? Those desirous of serving their country in uniform are brave but they aren't stupid. They know when they're going to be misused... and abused.
And that, my friends, is "art becomes life," as in "Outbreak," the movie, comes to America.
Speaking of Outbreak, watch it again and observe the final three minutes. The medical cell filtering machine they used to separate the blood from the infected monkey belonged to my company. I actually rented it to Warner Bros. for the movie. I may be the only guy, besides the movie people, Morgan Freeman, et. al., to have actually made money off a virus that may ultimately kill us all. Is this "Bizarro World," or what?
And this just in: Oblamo just appointed an "Ebola Czar." Did he pick a medical professional with management experience? Ummm, no. He picked a D.C. partisan insider hack with absolutely no medical experience. He picked a lawyer lobbyist named Ron Klain, who has served as both Joe "The Sheriff" Biden's and Al "Global Warming will kill us all" Gore's Chief of Staff. Klain's main claim to fame (kinda rhymes, don't it?) was counting chads during the famed "recount" that made "W" our POTUS. Oh, and managing the Stimulus Program which made nearly One Trillion Dollars disappear right before our very eyes! And half-a-billion of those bucks went to his client Solyndra, the failed solar company which was owned and managed by one of Obama's biggest donors and campaign bundlers. Yeah, that's it. Pick a lawyer to keep us safe from a virus. I couldn't make this crap up even if I tried.
So, in closing, I'd like to send along a suggestion to the Democrat National Committee: The next time you're in the process of selecting a candidate for President of the United States, please do America a big favor; pick someone with a modicum of experience at running something. Anything.
And maybe a little exposure to our military. Maybe even someone who has served in uniform. That would be helpful. And it would make America a whole lot safer. We could maybe even suffer through an administration led by someone who has actually been in a position of authority and responsibility. We've had a community organizer for six years now who's never run so much as a 7/11. For God's sake, pick someone who knows what the Hell he's doing! Please! What a concept!
(And thanks to Fred Simmer, my old home town classmate and friend, for the suggestion to opine on this important subject. Keep those cards and letters coming.)
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 10:23 AM 1 comment: Links to this post
Saturday, October 11, 2014
The Truth About Tax Inversions
You've probably heard about Burger King buying smaller Canadian fast-food chain Tim Horton's. Horton's is Canada's answer to Dunkin Donuts. And in an $11.4 billion dollar deal, The "King" has decided to bail on America and move its operational headquarters a couple of thousand miles north. Why? Let me shine some light on that for you...
America has the absolute highest corporate tax rate in the entire world. The Universe, actually. We, America, charge a flat 35% on profits earned by our America-domiciled corps. 35%. That's a whole lot of shekels, kiddies. And when compared with the 23% charged by Japan, the previous champ, and the 15% you pay Ireland and Canada, America's more like the Mob than a partner in your success.
And that's why so many of us are clamoring for tax reform. Lower the tax rates, we demand! There's an old saying, if you want less of something, just tax it more. So if we want less tax revenues, we tax corporate profits more. And that causes the corporations to do exactly what their shareholders demand they do: find ways to lessen the tax bite charged by the IRS. In fact, corporate CEO's and boards of directors have a fiscal and fiduciary duty to their shareholders to take such steps as are necessary to minimize tax rates so as to increase profits, and thereby returns on investments.
Let me say that again: Corporate boards are required to take such steps as prove necessary to maximize returns for their shareholders. To do less means they'll be updating their resumes post-haste.
One of the ways corporations can use is so-called "tax inversions." By this practice an American corp can buy an often smaller foreign-domiciled company and then merge with it. By then moving the newly merged corporate domicile to the other business's country, our corp can stop paying America's tax rates and start paying the foreign nation's. Or, has recently begun to occur, corporations located in Texas, let's say, or Tennessee, or Nevada, as examples, are buying California corporations and moving their HQ's east. Same idea, same result. Imagine: buy a California corporation, move it to a no-tax state, immediately realize a 10+% increase in profits.
Another method to reduce the tax bite is to leave profits earned overseas...overseas. According to the most recent statistics, something on the order of $3,000,000,000,000 is languishing overseas because to bring it home would mean an instant 35% tax bite. Imagine how many jobs could be produced with Three Trillion Dollars! Wouldn't it make sense to offer corporations a one-time break in exchange for repatriating this huge sum of money? Of course it would. Will Barry and his sycophants ever do such a thing? Shame on you for asking.
But our Golfer-in-Chief doesn't like the steps many of our corporations are choosing to take in order to lessen tax impacts. He NEEDS that tax revenue in order to redistribute it to those whose votes he's seeking. And there's no way he's going to give up tax revenues, even if by doing so he'd increase receipts. He's frankly just not that bright. And, importantly, doing so wasn't one of the options covered in Alinsky's book, "The Rules for Radicals," Barry's bedtime reading. He says that he will therefore instruct the IRS and any other Fed agency to outlaw such activities. Outlaw them!
Imagine that. Outlaw something that isn't against the law, because people are smart enough to use the laws to get around arrogant, selfish, preening bastards who want to punish them for making a profit. And then stand up in front of a bunch of hipmotized weenies and union goons and bitch about corporations doing what their boards require them to do. And, what is completely and entirely within our tax laws to do.
Suggestion to the Democrat National Committee: The next time you decide to pick a candidate for POTUS, it might be a really good idea to choose one who actually understands something about the principles of economics...
Posted by Chuck Cassity at 10:24 AM No comments: Links to this post
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How far do you shoot people from?
Posted 25 December 2006 - 04:54 PM
first Id like to brag bout my shortest.
went up with a team, noticed i was hung out to dry, hid behind a bunker, 5min later theres an enemy in another bunker about 4 feet away from me. (these bunkers have holes in them for shooting through) so, realizing he doesnt see me, i raise my gun, sight him in, one shot, on the left side of his mask.
other than this rare ocasion if theyre within 20yds i try to gun em down. but im not above taking the long shot when i feel its reasonably open!
my longest was about 150 yards with my flatline barrel tuned up (made more acurate) and my sight zeroed in. 5 shots one kill! guy didnt even see me, or hear this supposedly loud tippmann 98c! then i get in a 95 second firefight and take out like a seven person squad! i felt awesome! I get up and yell "I am immortal!!!" just then some flanker nails me in the mask and i yell "why'd ya hafta go and do that! i was in a moment!" meanwhile i walk off the field with my humility duely restored.
Posted 11 January 2007 - 08:51 AM
Posted 11 January 2007 - 11:53 AM
Posted 11 January 2007 - 12:45 PM
before i shot him i decided to be a bit cocky so i said "psssst! hey mate!" he turns around and i cap him in the butt.
and if you think that was a bit harsh when i could of just barrel tagged him well i forgot to point out that this guy had been wiping the last few rounds so we werent very impressed with him. so yeah i was quite lucky.
Posted 11 January 2007 - 12:48 PM
Posted 12 January 2007 - 01:01 AM
Now my longest shot story.
Supergame XXXI (for those who don't know, it's the best game out there hands down) we were playin the DMZ and I had gotten into a low-limbed tree and was taking out guys in a small bunker on the flank of the base. After a while, one guy on a bunker further up (I'd say about 40 yds...that's 120 feet for those who don't wtf they're doin) started shooting at me. now there was no way in hell he was going to hit, but it was a little annoying. Now having the wonderful A5 with me, I switched from my 16" rifled barrel (which gives a VERY straight shot) to my flatline (which gives a longball, not-so-straight shot) and I took careful aim, hoping to just scare him. I fire one round, and it took about a half second as I watched it go down range and plunk him right in the head. OWNED. Yes, I know, it was great.
Snipess, on Nov 29 2006, 06:11 PM, said:
Sniping in paintball has little to do with ballistics. I say the better the sniper, the closer his shots are. Guys who can take shots at less than 10 yards and the opponents have no idea where it came from -- those are the REAL paintball snipers. BTW 50 yards is 150 feet -- the generalized "maximum shooting distance" of any paintball marker.
Leaders Lead from the Front
Posted 12 January 2007 - 05:47 AM
Posted 22 January 2007 - 01:14 AM
on the other hand, when the situation favors it, i'll take the obscenely long shots that are pushing the maximum effective range of a paintball. here i find it's best to shoot as little as possible, so if you miss, they can't follow a rope of paint back to your hide. (e.x. - i ended a president game right off the break (approx 210 foot shot))
Short and sweet:
all my shots come from either damn-near barrel tag range or beyond flatline-range
Posted 22 January 2007 - 08:50 AM
Posted 22 January 2007 - 10:19 AM
Posted 22 January 2007 - 12:52 PM
Luck shots might, MIGHT occur at that range, but nothing regular.
paintballs are far too light with not nearly enough force behind them to get out that far effectively, if at all.....talk about arc, you'd have to be aiming at the stars for that one.
Posted 22 January 2007 - 01:03 PM
Posted 22 January 2007 - 08:10 PM
Proud 98c owner!
Posted 28 January 2007 - 07:22 AM
I wasn't playing as a sniper but I usually hit ppl at 30-40 yards. Longest ones have been 60 yards during woodsball. Not bad considering I was using my old GT2000 with 14" twister barrel but mainly lucky shots
This post has been edited by Fenix: 28 January 2007 - 07:23 AM
98% of people on this forum will say that Tippmann pwns all. If you are one of the 2% that disagrees put this in your sig
Automaggot #116
Posted 28 January 2007 - 09:13 PM

subset: commoncrawl


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Added Oct 28, 2012
by hardlyangel
Coimbra, Portugal
I haven't much to say about this dress except that I wear it a lot. I used flannel pied-de-poule so… It's so warm!
More photos on my blog
Oct 30, 2012, 09.53 AMby trploceanmoon
Cute dress! Love it :-)
Oct 28, 2012, 11.59 PMby Ruffles Gazebo
looks so nice and comyf !
Oct 28, 2012, 08.30 PMby Mary Athey
its lovely on you, well done x
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Sande House Rental Photos and Description
Hinrichs guest house for up to 11 people, ideal group holiday in Sande
Our cottage in Sande (Friesland) offers an ideal starting point for your family or group holidays for up to 11 people. Your dog is welcome by arrangement - a large, fenced yard this can romp and play. In a total of 5 bedrooms with double beds and flat-screen TV as well as in the dressing room with a single bed and cot (can also be placed in the bedroom), you will find the peace you seek. The large living room with adjoining dining area leaves nothing to be desired - the media area is equipped with a flat-screen TV and a stereo system with USB slot. The large leather sofa set and the lovely decorated ensure a pleasant atmosphere. From the living room you have a perfect view of the garden, on the terrace, you can grill in fine weather. Corresponding patio sets, see the separarten garden shed. In addition, one bedroom has a balcony, another direct access to the private terrace. In the fully equipped kitchen you will find everything you need for cooking - from the coffee maker up to the oven with ceramic hob, from coffee and tableware through to microwave and dishwasher. Your breakfast cook easily in the egg cooker, the right toast is toasted in the toaster. Again, you will find a dining table with chairs. In the side room itself basket and bottle crates can easily be stowed. The bathroom features among others a shower, a bathtub and a toilet - hair dryer, hair iron, shampoo and shower gel are available. The separate laundry room is also also a washing machine and a dryer, an ironing board, iron, clothes horse wings and a coat rack. Your car can be parked in the hotel garage or on the plots before.
- Suitability:
- children welcome
- pets considered
- wheelchair inaccessible


text:
Abstract available in
Claims available in
Description (OCR text may contain errors)
Jan. 26,1954 N. M. KAMBOURAKIS SUN BATHING APPARATUS Filed Aug. 21, 1952 3 Sheets-Sheet l INVENTOR. MaolasMffambmmkis Jan. 26, 1954 N. M. KAMBOURAKIS SUN BATHING APPARATUS 5 Sheets-Sheet 2 Filed Aug. 21, 1952 INVENTOR. MmlasMKambmm/i'is Jan. 26, 1954 N. M. KAMBOURAKIS 2,667,169
sun BATHING APPARATUS Filed Aug. 21, 1952 3 Sheets-Sheet 3 J7 56 55 5 75 8/ Lg a/ V W t IN V EN TOR.
ATTORNEYS Patented Jan. 26, 1954 2,66Llt91 UNITED STATES PATENT OFFICE SUN BATHING APPARATUS N ichoias M. Kambourakis, New York, N. Y. Application August 21, 1952, Serial No. 305,576 8 Claims. (01. 128-372) My invention relates generally to a sun bathing apparatus and more particularly to a device for rotatably supporting the human body in a reclining or prone position so that uniform exposure of the body to the suns rays may be secured.
Bathers, seashore residents, and vaoationists spend a large portion of their time partaking of the suns rays to secure a tan appearance and to derive benefits flowing from exposure to ultraviolet light. To secure an even tan over the entire body, it is necessary for a person frequently to assume various awkward and tiresome positions.
The usual method of exposing ones body to the suns rays consists in lying on the ground and occasionally turning to expose the various parts of the anatomy to the sun. By this method it is not always possible comfortably to obtain a uniform tan. Further, sun bathers assuming a position on the ground are deprived of the benefit of cooling breezes which may prevail above the surface of the ground and in addition are subjected frequently to the unpleasantly hard and uneven contour of the ground.
Accordingly, a principal object of my invention is to provide an apparatus which will support the human body above the surface of the ground.
for exposure to the suns rays, said apparatus being operable bythe user to effect exposure of all of the various portions of the body.
A further object of my invention is to provide a structure which will rotatably support the body in a prone position whereby uniform exposure to the sun may be effected.
A further object of the invention is to provide. an apparatus manually operable by the user for rotatably supporting the human body in a position of exposure to the sun.
A further object of my invention is to provide an apparatus which may be actuated by the users feet for rotatably supporting the human body in a position for exposure to the sun.
Another object of the invention is to provide an apparatus embodying a body support rotatable by power driven means controlled by the user of the apparatus whereby uniform exposure of the users body to the sun may be effected.
A further object of the invention is to provide a portable device whereby all parts of the human body may be exposed to the rays of the sun in a graceful attitude.
Yet another object of the invention is to provide a mechanism through the utilization of which an individual may acquire an even and uniform tan while avoiding the dirt and unhealthy conthe body Figure 2 is a front elevational View of my sun bathing apparatus shown in Figure 1,
Figure 3 is an end view of the apparatus shown in Figures 1 and 2, v
Figure 4 is a sectional view of the foot actuating mechanism taken on line 44 of Figure 1,
Figure 5 is a detailed sectional View taken on line 55 of Figure 4,
Figure 6 is a sectional view taken on line 6-6 of Figure 1,
Figure? is a sectional View taken on line 1-1 of Figure 6,
Figure 8 is a detailed sectional view taken on line 8-8 of Figure 1.
Referring to the drawings, I" have shown in Figures 1 and 2 a specific embodiment of my sun bathing apparatus wherein a facsimile of the human body i is illustrated mounted in position for exposure to the suns rays.
In the device shown in these figures, a supporting base 2 is hingedly connected to the head box 3 by suitable hinges 4. The base 2 engages the ground or analogous surface on which my device is to be positioned for exposing the body to the suns rays and joins the head box 3 with the foot supporting post 5.
The post 5, which suports the foot end of the body supporting structure is secured perpendicularly to the base member 2 by a flanged coupling 6. Coupling 6 is appropriately secured to the base 2 by screws 7 and holds the lower end of the post 5 by a set screw 8 engaging the outer surface of the lower end of post 5 which extends into the center opening of coupling 6. The upper end of post 5 is provided with a retaining connector 9 threaded to the upper end of the post. Connector 9 has a pocket l0 which rotatably receives the foot end of the body supporting structure and serves as a bearing support therefor.
Additional support for the head box 3 is provided by leg ll pivotally joined to the bottom of the head box 3 by member l2. This support in addition to thehinge connection with the base 2 positions the head box 3 perpendicular to the plane of the base 2, as shown in Figures 6 and '7. The head box houses the rotating mechanism for the body supporting structure, the operation of which will be explained later.
The body supporting structure comprises a generally U-shaped member l3, the ends of which are threadably connected to a disc M. The center of the curved portion of the U-shaped member I3 is joined with an axle I5, the end of which is received in the pocket ID of the connector 9 mounted on the upper end of post 5. It will be apparent from the drawings that the axle l serves as the axis of rotation for the foot end of the body supporting structure.
As previously described the ends of the U- shaped member |3 are connected to the disc l4. This disc I4 is concentric to an opening N5 of an annular ring Ring I1 and a similar ring I8 are secured in spaced relationship by a plurality of spacing tubes IS. The rings l1 and I3, spaced by the tubes l9, are secured together by bolts and nuts 2|. This assembly of the rings l1 and I8 is secured Within the head box 3 by angle members 22, one end of which is secured beneath the nuts 2| on bolts 20 and the other end of which is secured to the adjacent wall of the head box 3 by securing members 23. The concentric relationship between disc |4 and the opening H5 in ring I! provides an effective seal to prevent sand and other foreign matter from seeping into the head box 3 and injuring the driving parts therein. The function of the ring |8 will become more apparent from the description which follows.
Stub threaded members 24 are threadably received in threaded openings in the disc I4. Threaded couplings 25 are threaded on these stub members 24 for threadably engaging the ends of the generally U-shaped member IS. The generally U-shaped member I3 is constructed of four rods 26, 21, 28, and 29, which are connected by threaded couplings 3| and 32, respectively. A semi-circular member is joined to the connected straight members by bearing boxes 33 and 34 to complete the U-shaped member 13. These bearing boxes 33 and 34 may be appropriately connected to the semi-circular member 30 and the outer ends of the straight members 28 and 23 as by welding or brazing. By joining the straight members through threaded couplings 25 or 3| and 32, it is a simple matter to disassemble the body supporting structure so that the apparatus may be folded up when it is desired to transport the device from one location to another.
To support the human body on the apparatus, there is provided a head supporting pillow 35 which is secured by rigid arms 36 and 31 at the opposite sides thereof to the rods 26 and 21, respectively, of the U-shaped member I3. A head strap 38 is rigidly secured to one side of the head supporting pillow 35 and detachably connected to the opposite side of the head pillow by a suitable clasp 39. This head strap 38 extends across the forehead of the person positioned on the apparatus to retain his head on the pillow 35 when the apparatus is rotated for exposing the back of the body to the sun.
For supporting the hip portion of the body, a suitable canvas strap 40 is connected between rods 26 and 21 and normally extends beneath the buttocks. A second, similar, strap 4| extends above the persons body and is securely fastened to the rod 26, but is releasably connected to the rod 21 by a suitable clasp 42. Thus, it will be seen that when the member I3 is rotated so that the person is facing downwardly the detachable strap 4| will support the weight of the persons hips.
In addition to the head and hip supports, a plurality of fine soft strands 43 are connected between the opposite side rods 26 and 28 and 27 and 29, extending below the body on the apparatus so as to assist in distributing and supporting the Weight of the persons body. These strands 43 are secured to the rods of the U-shaped member I3 by suitable straps 44 extending around the appropriate rods of the U-shaped member. These straps 44 are perforated at points spaced along their meeting edges and provided with grommets 45 to which the strands 43 are secured. As shown specifically in Figure 8, the strand 43 is secured to the rod 21 by extending through the grommet 45 in the strap 44 around rod 21. This strand extends across to the strap 44 on rod 25 through the grommet 45 of this latter strap and back across as upper strands 43 to the opposite rod 21. The upper strands 46 are releasably connected to the rods 21 and 29 so as to enable their removal from one side when the person desires to leave or have access for use of my apparatus. To obtain this releasability for theends of the upper strands 46, the ends thereof are secured to a longitudinally extending rod 41 which has hooks 48 at the opposite ends thereof adapted to hook over the rods 21 and 29 to secure the upper strands 49 to these rods 2'! and 29.
It is apparent from the above discussion that when an individual desires to use my sun bathing apparatus the head strap 38 will be unlatched from clasp 39, the canvas strap 4| disconnected from clasp 42 and the plurality of strands 48 disconnected from the rods 21 and 29 by unhooking the hooks 48. The person then may position himself, as shown in Figures 1 and 2 of the drawings, for exposure of his body to the beneficial rays of the sun. When the user is facing upwardly, as shown in these figures, it is not necessary of course that the head strap, body strap, and strands be connected across the upper side of his body. However when he desires to rotate the body so as to expose his back to the sun's rays the head strap 38 is secured across the forehead by attaching at clasp 39, the body strap 4| is secured in place by clasp 42, and strands 46 are connected to the rods 21 and 29 by hooks 48. Having done this, the body supporting structure may be rotated so that the individual faces downwardly. When facing downwardly, it of course is obvious that the persons weight is'supported by the head strap, body strap, and detachable strands.
It is likewise obvious from the above description that an individual may leave my sun bathing apparatus when desired by merely rotating the body supporting structure until he is facing upwardly and then disconnecting the various straps and strands which extend across his body.
Reference will now be made to Figures 6 and 7 wherein I have shown the head end support construction for the body supporting structure. As previously noted, the disc I4 is secured to the ends of the U-shaped member l3. An axle 49 extends through an opening 53 in the disc M. This opening 5|] rotatably engages the axle 49. To reduce the friction and possible wear upon relative rotation between disc l4 and axle 49, the opening 50 may be provided with suitable bearing material or ball bearings (not shown). The load supporting axle 49 is supported at one end thereof by a support 51 extending diametrically across the outer ring 18. The end of axle 39, which engages the support 51 is made hexagonal in cross-section and is engaged in a hexagonal recess 52 formed in the support 5| to prevent rotation of the axle with respect to the support 5i. A securing bolt 53 extends through the support 51 and a nut 54 is threaded thereon so as to securely fasten the axle 49 to the support 5!.
It will thus be seen that with rings l1 and I8 mounted in the head box 3 as previously described, axle 55 provides a bearing surface for rotatably positioning the disc I4 within the head box and thereby supporting the head end of the body supporting structure.
Having described the structure for rotatably mounting the body supporting structure, I will now describe the various means for rotating the body support as desired by the user when positioned on my sun bathing apparatus.
To enable a person when positioned on my sun bathing apparatus to rotate his body by manual means, I provide a hand ring 55 adjacent to the head pillow 35. This ring 55 is mounted on a stationary plate 56 by support rods 57 as shown in Figure 7. This plate 56 is rigidly secured to one end of the axle 49 as by welding or some other suitable securing means. Since the axle 49 is specifically mounted so that it will not rotate, when the disc 56 and hand ring 55 are mounted thereon, it is a simple matter for the user of the apparatus to reach over his head, grasp the hand ring 55 to turn his body and the supporting structure.
As an alternative means for revolving the users body, I have shown a pulley 58 secured to the disc M and rotatably received on the bearing surface of the axle 49. This pulley 58 is secured to the disc M by cap screws 59. In the previous description, it was pointed out that disc M was secured to the body supporting structure and obviously, therefore, rotates with such structure. Accordingly, by providing suitable driving means for the pulley 58, it is possible to rotate the body supporting structure. In Figures 1, 2, and 3 I have illustrated such a form of driving means. In these figures a driving belt 68 engages the pulley 58 and extends outwardly through an opening 6! in the head box 3 around a driving pulley 92. This pulley 62 is mounted on the output shaft of a suitable speed reducer 53, which, in turn, is driven by an electric motor 64. Thus it will be seen that by mounting a suitable control switch for the motor 64 adjacent the hand of the person on my sun bathing apparatus, it is a simple matter to cause rotation of the body supporting structure, by closing the switch for motor 54 and thereby rotating the device by means of the belt drive for pulley 58.
The motor 5 3 and speed reducer 63 are illustrated in Figures 1, 2, and 3 as being secured toa shelf 65 attached to the side of the head box 3. In a conventional manner this shelf 55 is braced by diagonal struts 66 engaging the under side of the shelf and the side of the head box 3 below the shelf 55.
A third alternative driving means for my sun bathing apparatus consists of a mechanism so that rotation of the body supporting structure may be accomplished by movement of the users feet.
To enable the body supporting structure to be rotated by the users feet, a pedal 91 is positionedat the foot end of the body supporting structure mounted so that it may berocked on a tran verse axis between the positions shown in dotted lines on Figure 2. Bearing supports 68 for the pedal are provided on the under side of the pedal 61 and are journaled on axles 69 and 19. These axles 69 and 18 extend transverse to the body supporting structure through the bearing boxes 33 and 34 of U-shaped member l3. The inner ends of axles 69 and 18 are rotatably received in a transverse bearing 1| secured to the inner endof the axle 15. The outer ends of axles 59 and 10 are provided with bevel gears 12 and 13, respectively, secured to the axles by suitable screws 14.
Extending parallel and adjacent to the rods 26, 27, 28, and 29 of the U-shaped member l3 are drive shafts T5 and '16. These shafts are supported at the foot end of the body supporting structure by hearing blocks 11 and I8, rigidly secured to the rods 28 and 29, respectively, so as to support the shafts 15 and 15 outwardly of and parallel to the rods of U-shaped member IS. The foot ends of shafts l5 and 76 are provided with bevel gears 19 and 80 operatively associated with the bevel gears 12 and 73, respectively. The head ends of the shafts 15 and 76 are journaled in apertures 8| in the disc Id and are provided at this end with driving pinions 82 and 83, respectively. Each pinion is secured to its respective shaft by a suitable set screw 84. A stationary gear is mounted on the hexagonal portion of axle 49 within the head box 3. This gear 85 is fixed on the axle 49 by a set screw 55. The teeth on the periphery of this gear are engaged by the pinions 82 and 83 so that rotation of these pinions will compel the rotation of disc i l U-shaped member I3. Thus, it will be apparent that when the shafts 15 and 75 are rotated in the same direction, with the gear 85 being stationary, the rotation of shafts 15 and 15 and the pinions 82 and 83 thereon will cause the pinions to roll around the periphery of the gear 85 and carry the U-shaped member 13 fastened to disc it along with them.
Referring to Figures 1 and e specifically, it is seen that with the particular gear relationship illustrated, the shafts 75 and it will be rotated when the axles 69 and 79 are rotated in opposite directions. To accomplish this opposite rotation of axles 69 and I0, ratchet means 83 and 89 are secured intermediate the ends of the respective axles 69 and 10 by set screws 99. Between the ratchet means 88 and 89 and the bearing boxes 33 and 34, I have shown spacing collars 9| and 92 secured to the respective shafts by set screws 93 so that proper positioning of the ratchet means 88 and 89 on the axles will be secured. Bearing supports 68 and the pedal 61 are secured to a driving member I00 within each of the ratchet means 88 and 89 on either side of the pedal 61.
The specific construction of the ratchet means 88 is illustrated in Figure 5. In this figure, it will be noted that a ratchet housing 55 having a somewhat star-shaped interior area is used as the ratchet wheel in the ratchet means. The sides of the points of this star-shaped area are provided so that they may be engaged by pawls which are pivoted about pins 95 and urged outwardly toward the housing 94 by suitable springs 91. Each spring 91 has a loop surrounding a pin 98 with one arm of each spring engaging one of the pawls 95 and the other arm of the spring resting on a stop 99 on the driving mem ber I99. The pins 96 and 98' secure the pa-wls 95 and spring 91, respectively, to the driving member I00. It will thus be seen that upon rotation of the driving member I09 in a clockwise direction, the pawls 95 will engage the sides of the star points of housing 94 and impart the clockwise movement to the housing and shaft 69 secured thereto. Likewise, when the driving member N10 is rotated in the opposite direction, i. e., counterclockwise, the pawls 95 will move inwardly on pins 96 so as not to impart movement to the housing 94.
The ratchet means 89 on the opposite side of the pedal 61 is similarly constructed to the ratchet means 88. However, ratchet means 89 is assembled so that when the pedal 61, during the rocking action, is rotating driving member I08 of ratchet means 88 so as to cause rotation of axle 69, the axle 10 will not be driven but will be riding free. Likewise, in the reverse rocking of the pedal 61, the ratchet means 89 causes driving of axle 10 while the axle 69 is riding free through its ratchet means 88.
Having specifically described my particular foot actuated mechanism for causing rotation of the body supporting structure in my sun bathing apparatus, it should be clear that when the user is in position on the apparatus, he will engage the pedal ii! with his feet and cause the pedal to rock backwards and forwards from the positions shown in dotted lines on Figure 2. This rocking of pedal 57 through the appropriate ratchet means 88 or 89 will cause driving force to be transmitted for each movement of the pedal through axle ea or it, the bevel gear drive, shaft or it to the pinions which engage the stationary gear 85.
With regard to the structure of the head box 3, it will be noted that I have provided a covering door iiil for the rear side of such box and have hingedly connected this door as by hinges $32, so that access may be had to the interior of the head box 3 for greasing and such servicing of the mechanism therein as may be necessary. It will also be noted that a latching handle I03 is provided on the door lili to retain the door in closed position so that dust and dirt may not enter the head box 3 and interfere with the efiicient operation of the rotating mechanism mounted thcr in.
In order to assist the person in mounting my sun bathing apparatus, I have provided a center body support his which is pivotally connected to the base 2 by a bracket 95. The upper end of this body support lu l has a saddle member Hill which may be positioned beneath the strap 49 to reinforce the apparatus and facilitate the operation of mounting the bathing apparatus. As dotted lines in Figure 2, this center shown in I body support ill-'3 extends vertically from beneath the center of the body supporting structure. The arms of the saddle 198, when the center body support is in this position, engage the side members of the body supporting structure to prevent rotation of the device when the person positioning himself on the apparatus.
Having now particularly described a specific embodiment of my invention, what I consider to be novel and desire to secure by Letters Patent is:
1. Sun bathing apparatus comprising a generally U-shaped body supporting member having spaced parallel side rails to extend along the sides of the body, said side rails being constructed of a plurality of separable sections connected in axially aligned relation, means rotatably mount ing the opposite ends of said member for rotation about a longitudinal axis, a body supporting means connected between said parallel rails for releasably retaining a person on said member, said body supporting means including a head support, hip support, and first plurality of spaced parallel flexible strands spaced from said head and hip support, and a head strap, hip strap and second plurality of spaced parallel flexible strands detachably connected to and cooperating with said head support, hip support and first flexible strands, respectively, to retain the persons body on said member during complete rotation thereof and permit exposure of substantially the entire body to the suns rays and driving means actuatable by the person on the member for causing said member to rotate so as to expose difierent portions of the persons body to the suns rays.
2. An apparatus as recited in claim 1 wherein said driving means comprises an electric motor and driving belt operatively associated with said member whereby operation of said motor will cause said member to rotate.
3. A sun bathing apparatus comprising a retatably mounted generally U-shaped memberhaving spaced parallel side rails, a head support on said member, a hip support on said member, a plurality of parallel flexible strands connected between said side rails for further supporting the body of an individual using the apparatus while permitting exposure of the body to the suns rays, a head strap dctachably connected to said head support for retaining the users head on said head support, a hip strap detachably connected to said support for retaining the users hips on said hip support, a second plurality of parallel, flexible strands detachably connected between said side rails, head strap, hip strap, and second plurality of strands serving to retain the user's body on said U-shaped member when said U-shaped member is completely rotated while permitting exposure of the body to the suns rays.
4. A sun bathing apparatus as recited in claim 3 having means operable from said U-shaped member for effecting rotation of said U-shaped member.
5. A sun bathing apparatus comprising a base, a substantially U-shaped body supporting member, a disc secured to the head end of said U-shaped member, means on said base mounting said member and disc for rotation about a longitudinal axis, a head support secured between the legs of said U-shaped member, a hip support secured between the legs of said U-shaped member, means detachably associated with said head and hip supports for retaining a human body on said member, a gear mounted on said base adjacent said disc, drive shafts extending parallel to the legs of said member and journaled in apertures in said disc, pinions mounted on the ends of said drive shafts engaging said gear, a pedal on the foot end of said member mounted for rocking movement on an axis transverse to said member, means connecting said pedal and drive shafts whereby movement of said pedal causes rotation of said drive shafts to thereby rotate said member.
6. An apparatus as recited in claim 5 wherein said connecting means comprises bevel gears mounted on the end of each of said shafts and bevel gears mounted on the pedal mounting constructed and arranged to cause rotation of said drive shafts upon rocking of said pedal.
7. An apparatus as recited in claim 6 wherein ratchet means are provided between said secondname-d bevel gears and said pedal whereby every rocking movement of said pedal will transmit drivin power to one of the shafts.
8. Sun bathing apparatus comprising a generally U-shaped member, means rotatably mounting the opposite ends of said member for rotation about a longitudinal axis, body supporting means on said member for releasably retaining a person on said member and driving means actuatable by the person on the member for causing said member to rotate so as to ex ose different portions of the persons body to the suns rays, said driving means comprising a pedal mounted for rocking movement about an axis 10 transverse to and in the plane of said U-shaped member, and power transmitting means operatively associated therewith whereby rocking of said pedal causes rotation of said U-shaped member. 7
References Cited in the file of this patent UNITED STATES PATENTS
Patent Citations
Referenced by
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Franchione discontinues inside info newsletter for A&M boosters
DALLAS -- Texas A&M coach Dennis Franchione said he has stopped selling inside information on the Aggies in a newsletter to boosters who paid $1,200 per year in subscription fees that helped finance the coach's personal Web site.
About a dozen elite boosters subscribed for the past three years to the e-mail newsletter, called "VIP Connection." It offered Franchione's candid assessments of players and specific injury information, details Franchione routinely declined to discuss publicly because, he would say, it is not "our policy" to disclose injuries.
Franchione made subscribers sign a confidentiality agreement and said he doesn't believe any of the inside information was used for gambling, the San Antonio Express-News reported Friday after obtaining a copy of the newsletter through a "third-party source."
"We asked them to sign something," Franchione told the newspaper. "And for them not to do that. Most of these people are tremendously loyal Aggies."
Athletics Director Bill Byrne released a statement Friday saying he was first made aware of the newsletter by a reporter two weeks ago.
"When I saw a copy of an email, I called Coach Fran and recommended this program be discontinued," Byrne said. "I understand he stopped at that time."
In the same statement, Franchione said the e-mail list began when a group of 12 to 15 boosters participated in a Kickoff Camp that raised money for the school band, the library and the booster club. The newsletter, he said, "came about as an extension of trying to keep some dedicated and loyal fans updated throughout the year on the football program."
"There was no intent to deceive anyone," Franchione said. "I thought this was another avenue of trying to keep some of our top donors informed about our football program."
The newsletter was written by Mike McKenzie, Franchione's personal assistant. The two denied benefiting financially from the newsletter.
In one newsletter, McKenzie wrote about six players being unavailable to play against Montana State and listed their specific injuries. A seventh player was "iffy" because he had not fully recovered from a mild concussion, according to the newsletter.
The Texas A&M players mentioned by name in the newsletter had authorized the school to release information on their injury status, said Alan Cannon, an athletics department spokesman.
McKenzie also wrote about Franchione's assessment of the Aggies' wide receivers.
"Privately, Coach told me last night that Earvin [Taylor] and Pierre [Brown] are very steady but with average speed," McKenzie wrote. "Kerry [Franks] has great speed, but [is] inconsistent in receiving."
McKenzie, who worked for Franchione at his previous coaching stops at Alabama and TCU, is listed on the A&M staff directory as a "special assistant to the athletic director." His newsletter duties were done on his own time, Cannon said.
Franchione, who makes about $2 million per year in a contract that runs through 2011, is 28-24 since taking over at Texas A&M in 2003. He has received harsh criticism from the program's ardent fans since the team's 34-17 loss last week at Miami.
A spokesman for the university did not respond to attempts by The Associated Press to reach top university administrators for comment.
The boosters' money went to the company that operates Franchione's personal Web site, coachfran.com, Franchione said. The boosters will receive refunds, he said.
NCAA rules require coaches to report to the school any "athletically related income and benefits from sources outside the institution." It was unclear Friday if Franchione had done so, or would be required to if all the boosters' subscription fees went to the Web site company.
Grant Teaff, executive director of the American Football Coaches Association, said there's nothing in his organization's code of ethics about writing newsletters to boosters. NCAA rules are explicit about reporting outside income and proper dealings with boosters, he said.
"I think every athletic director and head coach is very aware and clear of those concerns and issues," Teaff said.
Wake Forest coach Jim Grobe, the head of the coaches association's ethics committee, said it would be inappropriate for him to comment unless it were clear a coach had broken rules.
"An investigation would need to take place first before the ethics committee would be involved," Grobe said through a spokesman.
Many college coaches have personal Web sites and some offer inside information to those who pay for it. Virginia Tech coach Frank Beamer offers a "Coach's Club" membership for $39.95 per year that promises "the best, up-to-date, daily practice and injury reports straight from Coach Beamer, right off the practice fields."
Copyright 2007 by The Associated Press
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Story: Nov 18, 2014
New film studies prof helps students appreciate film as art ...
CIA Exhibition: Nov 07, 2014
Fall 2014 Exhibitions
Story: Nov 15, 2014
Students capture two of the top prizes in museum's surreal d...
Events: Dec 05, 2014
Student Holiday Craft Sale
Social: 2 days ago via Facebook
Registration opens on Monday, Nov. 25 for the Cleveland Institute of Arts 2D3D national art and design competition for high school students. There are 13 cash ...
Story: Nov 04, 2014
New CIA building taking shape; set for December completion
Story: Nov 03, 2014
New Uptown Residence Hall featured in CIA video
Story: Aug 18, 2014
CIA again named to "Best in the Midwest" list
Where Joseph McCullough Building , 1st floor
Opening reception Monday March 17, 3:30–4:30pm
As part of a week-long exploration into issues related to Feminism, and in conjunction with the panel discussion, CIA visual art students will be presenting an exhibition of work, Exposing the Truth.
Students participating in this exhibition, curated by Lane Cooper and Jessica Pinsky, include:
This week-long exploration includes a panel discussion on Monday, March 17, this exhibition, a performance by artist/performer Sara Holwerda, and a symposium on Friday, March 21.
This program is sponsored by CIA's Sculpture and Liberal Arts Departments, and The Sculpture Center.
Joseph McCullough Building
1st floor
11610 Euclid Avenue
Cleveland, OH 44106-1710


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The Columbian Plutarch, Or, an Exemplification of Several Distinguished American Characters.
Title: The Columbian Plutarch, or, An exemplification of several distinguished American characters.Author: Thomas WoodwardPublisher: Gale, Sabin ... Show synopsis Title: The Columbian Plutarch, or, An exemplification of several distinguished American characters.Author: Thomas WoodwardPublisher: Gale, Sabin Americana Description: Based on Joseph Sabin's famed bibliography, Bibliotheca Americana, Sabin Americana, 1500--1926 contains a collection of books, pamphlets, serials and other works about the Americas, from the time of their discovery to the early 1900s. Sabin Americana is rich in original accounts of discovery and exploration, pioneering and westward expansion, the U.S. Civil War and other military actions, Native Americans, slavery and abolition, religious history and more.Sabin Americana offers an up-close perspective on life in the western hemisphere, encompassing the arrival of the Europeans on the shores of North America in the late 15th century to the first decades of the 20th century. Covering a span of over 400 years in North, Central and South America as well as the Caribbean, this collection highlights the society, politics, religious beliefs, culture, contemporary opinions and momentous events of the time. It provides access to documents from an assortment of genres, sermons, political tracts, newspapers, books, pamphlets, maps, legislation, literature and more.Now for the first time, these high-quality digital scans of original works are available via print-on-demand, making them readily accessible to libraries, students, independent scholars, and readers of all ages.++++The below data was compiled from various identification fields in the bibliographic record of this title. This data is provided as an additional tool in helping to insure edition identification: ++++SourceLibrary: Huntington LibraryDocumentID: SABCP00249900CollectionID: CTRG10163995-BPublicationDate: 18190101SourceBibCitation: Selected Americana from Sabin's Dictionary of books relating to AmericaNotes: "For the biographical memoirs contained in this collection, the author is principally indebted to Dr. Rees' Cyclopaedia, Allen's Biographical dictionary, and Delaplaine's Repository of the lives and portraits of distinguished American characters."--Introd. Of the nine lives from Delaplaine's Repository, at least six were written by Charles Caldwell. Cf. his Autobiography, Philadelphia, 1855, p. 274, 431-432. Includes lives of the naturalist John Bartram and the physicians David Ramsey and Benjamin Rush, the latter adapted from Caldwell.Collation: vi, [2], 311 p.; 18 cm