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With the impending snow, I thought I might put up a story that brings back fond memories for me. I wrote the story in a single cold, cold evening at an art gallery in the cold, cold Bop Shop on Division Street. Enjoy.
Never Come Lopez
by Wayne Allen Sallee
It began quite innocently.
No, perhaps I should start another way, to be as blunt with the reader as Lopez was to me the first and only time we met. Some nights, when my sinuses are astonishingly uncongested, I will turn from my computer or awaken from a brief sleep, for I can almost smell the dank and fetid breath of the vile being. The odor of road kill and chick peas. A gag reflex sets in, and then the pungent effluvium is gone. It makes a man want to give up Benadryl.
The confrontation occurred on Division Street, in a neighborhood where I am its expatriate son. My name is Johnny Algiers, and I'm a private-eye. I use my mother's maiden name because Johnny Shehostacowicz doesn't really have a ring to it. Plus, the cost of my business cards would be a lot higher had I kept my true name. I return to this street, specifically where it intersects with Hermitage, knowing full well what the results will be; a similar scenario that gets played out is my tongue working to loosen a temporary crown on my right molar while I'm on the Congress-O'Hare elevated line. While on Division Street, I keep a low profile and always wear a retro grey sweater with white stripes. Even in summer, like when I got involved with that mess after the Therrio art showing.
Some call this street, with its stained neon and mumbling pedestrians, a way station for the damned. I would rather believe that honor belongs with Division Street out east, toward the lake. Singles' pick-up joints where drunken suburbanites take every major sports victory as a reason to overturn unlicensed jitney cabs and pose as media poster children for the incurably idiotic.
No, not the east side. The section of Division Street where the twisted events unfolded is as dark and cloying as an illicit affair with a cousin by marriage. A stretch of asphalt where you had to have as much on the next guy as he had on you to live through the night.
Or the next chicken.
The next rubber chicken.
The one known only as Lopez.
The night in question, I went to The Bop Shop, a legendary jazz joint that once had been a Puerto Rican pool hall. The generation before that, it was a Polish bar called The Lucky Stop. A wall separated the drinking and falling down crowd from the dance floor. When Kate Smith bought the place, she turned the dance floor area into a showplace for artwork by Chicago artists. String ensembles such as Three Years Ghost, or interactive plays by Slackbelly, would appear on a small stage in the rear. (When the pool hall was open, no one from the neighborhood quite recalls what the adjacent room was used for, though a mainstay stewbum everyone knows as Coco Loco claimed it was known on the street as "The Rumba Room.")
The only thing that annoyed me whenever I was there was an aged cat that would leap from a Miller Lite sign above the bar toward my groin whenever I was at a crucial point at the Barb Wire pinball machine.
During the course of the evening, a man I'd' call Joe told me the inside scoop regarding the topic of several of his paintings. A rubber chicken named Lopez, who was more flaccid than my penis (at the time, I was facing surgery for a kidney stone in my ureter).
A Texas man named Tony Miles—my detective instincts told that it was likely a pseudonym—had reported the rubber fowl missing, and days later had received shots from a Polaroid Land Camera of a supposedly kidnapped Lopez held captive in Juarez, Mexico. That day's newspaper, the Juarez Chronicle, was propped above a soiled bedspread. It was eventually discovered that the abraded chicken had staged his own abduction, and used the ransom money on call girls and rentals of Jackie Chan movies.
The man I refer to as Joe heard of this story and painted the scene (minus the kung fu film on the old Philco and the newspaper), a painting which now hung ignominiously on the east wall, near the stage. In my travels as a private investigator, I had found there was a Juarez, Arkansas, not far from Texarkana and the original setting for the 1973 film The Legend of Boggy Creek, at least until Teamsters disguised as Ku Klux Klan got involved. I did not let my ruminations be known because, frankly, they had little to do with the story.
Or so I thought.
Before I left, Joe told me that on most Thursdays, he, Rick, Pete, and Small Axe would each paint scenes from a new Lopez painting. Perhaps I should change the order of their names, to protect the innocent. And the day of the week.
Every Tuesday morning, Pete, Small Axe, Rick, and he would paint.
When I am bottomed out with no new cases (in truth, I am never really flush with the big bucks), I write stories and an occasional freelance article. So the men in the IRS suits never get wind of my second income, I use a pseudonym, Wayne Allen Sallee. I had not intended to implement a middle name, but it turned out that there was already a Wayne Sallee with NMI (that's "No Middle Initial" in cop talk) in Streator, out in Livingston County, who wrote pornographic novels with titles like, My Dachsund, My Lover.
I said my good-byes, reminded Kate about a small change pickpocket working the strip (spotting him was easy because the man had only one eyebrow covered with lint, so that it looked like the rim of an old fedora), mentally cursed that cat while cupping my groin from my inside pocket, and walked out the front door into a mild snowstorm.
As soon as I was out of view from the patrons, I was cold-cocked from behind.
The last thing I remember of that moment was the hot breath that was a mixture of chick peas, baklava, and Richard's Wild Irish Rose. As I fell to my knees, and then face first into the snow, I was mystified by small three-toed tracks all around me.
In the damp snow, they resembled chicken scratching.
I have trained myself not to remain unconscious for long periods of time. It is not some Middle Eastern technique I learned while training for my P.I. license. When I was young, I had received a golden retriever as a gift from some spiteful relative, and the mutt's favorite game was to use my ear as a chew toy and fling me repeatedly into an end table. After several dozen dog-induced acrobatics as a child (it stopped when I gained enough weight to create a sort of stalemate), added to several somewhat embarrassing incidents as an adult which involved me wearing cowboy boots with Dr. Scholl's cushioned insoles, I had "evolved" into having what could be best be described as a beetle-brow. I try to keep a low profile, but there have been several photographs accompanying newspaper articles following several awkward cases I have worked on, most notably the Siamese twin organ donor from Kankakee, which display my bulging forehead in grainy black-and-white.
I was out fifteen minutes, tops, no longer than a bathroom stop for a mildly-constipated man.
When I awoke, I was blindfolded. Rather loosely, I might add, but I did not let on. Noting my head movement—actually, my neck, as I had a crick—my abductor started in on the same spiel I've heard from just about everyone who has ever held me captive. From The Scarlet Corgi on down to Mister 1934, each began their little soliloquy of mad lunacy by stating how foolish I was to fall prey to their special brand of revenge against a world that wronged them.
And crap like that. I had a running bet going with several of my fellow P.I.'s on how many of our captors implemented the word "misbegotten" when giving their life story.
Well, this one didn't use the word, but I did note that when he spoke, his voice came from somewhere around my waist. He tried to get me to believe some half-assed story about the chicken scratching in the snow on Division Street being the markings of an alien craft that had momentarily touched down to refuel.
I suspected that he would next tell me some fabricated nonsense about a Trilateral Poultry Commission and a Cigarette Smoking Chicken. My captor's madness went far beyond such conspiracies.
He seemed distracted enough that I could slowly loosen the blindfold by expanding and contracting the muscles in my ears. I could sense that he was walking in a circle as he spoke. He explained that he was indeed Lopez, and that there was a very simple reason for him knowing about my conversations within the Bop Shop and the minor deviations I had made in my retelling of the Lopez tale.
The rubber chicken wheezed that he was Future-Lopez, and he was aware of everything that occurred in the first seven millennium, except for several decades in the 27th century when he had suffered from recurring alcoholism. I feigned interest, hoping his additional blathering would keep him from noticing my almost having freed myself from the blindfold.
He spoke of changing the past, of having gone back to ancient Egypt to ensure their god Anubis would bested in battle and fall into antiquated obscurity. Future-Lopez suggested that the Museum of Science and Industry now had an entire exhibit on the Chicken Gods of Egypt. I somehow doubted that.
Before he could go on about his involvement in the Franco-Prussian Wars or the downfall of the Hasbro toy company, I came free of my blindfold with one last ear lobe contraction. And I understood why my abductor sounded chicken-sized: he was a white-haired man who had simply shrunken with age. He was missing so many teeth that when he smiled—and that was every time he expelled chick pea-smelling gas—he resembled a jack o'lantern.
And he balanced himself with a three-pronged cane, which explained the strange markings in the snow.
He knew the jig was up even before I told him that said jig was indeed up. I had assumed my arms were bound the whole time. Truth was, they had simply fallen asleep from when I was lying on top of them during my trip to dreamland. I raised one arm, wincing from the needle-sharpness of my circulation returning, and the old man surrendered.
His name was Jeremiah Belcaster, a stewbum pal of Coco Loco. He had crept into Kate's place before the obligatory four dollar cover began, and only because he saw the caterers bringing in the baklava, pita bread, and chick peas. After eating his fill, he then pathetically tried to hustle some Armitage Avenue yuppie in nine-ball.
"Then I heard Joe tell you the story about his rubber chicken," the old man wheezed. "I knew you were that detective guy who uses the name Johnny Algiers when you write your stories up. Coco told me about that time you chased down Mr. Vitriolic during the Loop Flood of '92."
I did recall that. Coco Loco had been living in a box on Lower Wacker that year, doing undercover work for one of the local news stations, in hopes of getting the goods on the meter readers.
"I figured I could maybe make some money offa your friends by kidnapping you," he said. I did not reply that most of my acquaintances were artists and musicians, and so had blessed little money to part with. The same is true for myself, which is why I try to make a few bucks from selling my memoirs piecemeal.
I moved forward, which caused the old man to panic. He tripped over his cane, let loose with a tremendous expulsion of flatulence, the force of which knocked his head against a metal sign advertising Yoo-hoo Chocolate Drink, rendering him unconscious.
I found a back stairwell that led out to Milwaukee Avenue, and started walking toward the subway. Several blocks up, I thought I heard a soft clucking sound from an alleyway, but it was only the noise made by some rumdum's throat as he gummed down an Aqua Velva and Night Train Express cocktail.
Wayne Allen Sallee
Proactive Contrition
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Monday, November 10, 2014
Times past. I wish I had followed Jesus's health situation over the past few months, but I was occupied with helping take care of my own father. I'm talking about Jesus F. Gonzalez, the photo below is via Google Images and shows Jesus talking to Briane Keene and David Schow. He and Buddy Martinez published INIQUITES, one of the finest magazines of the 1990s, I was in the third issue and the first issue had one of the earliest works I had seen by Alan M. Clark. He had been working on it when we hung out in Nashville with Jack Daves. Jesus knew of my CP and how typing causes me pain. And so he was one of the very few people who would call me on the phone, the last time was in early 2013, but he DID call, and we would sometimes talk for an hour or two at a time. Some people you miss more than others. Part of my insides are gone now.
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
I took some screen grabs of YouTubes to reflect what the Maxwell Street area looks like today as opposed to when I attended UIC in 1980-1982. The younger people who attend Bad Grammar have no idea of the hustle and then the desolation and then the displacement to make what is now the quaint little "University Village". The wonderful thing about writers is that a place like Maxwell Street can never be lost.
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
THE BEST BOOK SIGNED TO ME AND THE BEST COVER BLURB by JAY BONANSINGA
Jay Bonansinga and I have been friends for twenty years, going back to his first novel, THE BLACK MARIAH. He is currently writing the THE WALKING DEAD novels (co-written by Robert Kirkman) and is knocking it out of the park, as they say. Before I show you the photo of the book Jay signed, let me put up the quote, which pertains to my novella FOR YOU, THE LIVING.
"Chicago has its share of treasures – deep dish, the Bean, Kingston's blues, and Wayne Allen Sallee. Toiling in the stubborn vineyard of short fiction for most of his career, Sallee reaches a sort of a literary apogee with his brilliant and brutal horror novella "For You, The Living." Ostensibly a plague tale, told in classic Lovecraftian diary form, Sallee's yarn manages to deftly mingle the deeply personal with the gruesomely Grand Guignol. Riveting, ghastly, hilarious, creepy, and unforgettably Wayne-like, "For You, the Living" is at once a wholly original take on the zombie apocalypse genre while at the same time a heart-wrenching love story. This one will haunt you forever, folks. Highest recommendation!"
- Jay Bonansinga, national bestselling author of THE WALKING DEAD: RISE OF THE GOVERNOR and THE WALKING DEAD: THE ROAD TO WOODBURY
How can you not beat that? Maybe with the book and the signature, ha ha.
"Chicago has its share of treasures – deep dish, the Bean, Kingston's blues, and Wayne Allen Sallee. Toiling in the stubborn vineyard of short fiction for most of his career, Sallee reaches a sort of a literary apogee with his brilliant and brutal horror novella "For You, The Living." Ostensibly a plague tale, told in classic Lovecraftian diary form, Sallee's yarn manages to deftly mingle the deeply personal with the gruesomely Grand Guignol. Riveting, ghastly, hilarious, creepy, and unforgettably Wayne-like, "For You, the Living" is at once a wholly original take on the zombie apocalypse genre while at the same time a heart-wrenching love story. This one will haunt you forever, folks. Highest recommendation!"
- Jay Bonansinga, national bestselling author of THE WALKING DEAD: RISE OF THE GOVERNOR and THE WALKING DEAD: THE ROAD TO WOODBURY
How can you not beat that? Maybe with the book and the signature, ha ha.
Tuesday, October 28, 2014
Let's keep it going, shall we? Brendan Detzner started BAD GRAMMAR THEATER a few years ago when he lived over dere by the viaduct on 17th & Halsted. He has moved to the suburbs now, and so BGT still exists, only now in the back room of Powell's Books at Roosevelt & Halsted.
On 17 Oct 14, I read "Ghost Rider In My Eye" to a group of about forty people, but I was also able to meet up with Harold Holt, a fantastic writer I hadn't seen in a decade. A DECADE. There was the usual band of idiots, too. Mike Penkas. Jude Mire. Eric Cherry.
On 17 Oct 14, I read "Ghost Rider In My Eye" to a group of about forty people, but I was also able to meet up with Harold Holt, a fantastic writer I hadn't seen in a decade. A DECADE. There was the usual band of idiots, too. Mike Penkas. Jude Mire. Eric Cherry.
Monday, October 27, 2014
It has been awhile since I was able to get to any public readings, so earlier this month I was finally able to give Tina a brick as a return favor for the many times she allowed me to headline during those Monday night readings.
Saturday, October 25, 2014
Here I am reading at the Galway Arms, on Clark north of Fullerton, last month on a wonderfully rainy Thursday night. I read from I CAN'T COME CLEAN, my poetry collection, including portions of DESMOND'S INFERNO, a long poem I wrote in 1983 and never bothered to get published. Honestly. Also in attendance, Brendan Detzner, Michael Penkas, Alexei Collier, Kate Starling, and Tina Jens, the host. The photos of me (including the close-up) were taken by Eric Cherry.)
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text:
Posts by Steve Evans
2381 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007
Orange to impose overseas data cap to beat bill shock
Re: Something smells fishy.
What aren't they telling us?
You mean beyond the fact that all the mobile companies are still charging us way over the odds for roamed data and sms? If you're bored one day you want to work out the price per megabyte of a text message (i.e. less data than you could fit on the 3.5" floppy). Just make sure you're sitting down first.
41-megapixel MONSTER mobe shutters Nokia knockers
Re: Aren't we past this?
I imagine low light performance will be dire, then again, have you seen some of the posts your friends put up on facebook from a night out clubbing? Blurred and shaky appear to be this season's black.
Anyway, back to the subject... The clever solution when you're playing about with low light and photosites a fraction of the size of a human hair is to combine them, effectively dropping the resolution and then measuring the captured photons across a 3x3 block. Sure, your 41 megapixel silly camera resolution suddenly drops to 4.5mp, but you will at least have a hope of actually seeing something before you have to crank up the amplification so hard that you detect radio Luxembourg.
Although given the use of the horribly sales-pitch phrase "pixel over-sampling technology" I wouldn't be shocked to find out that the sensor doesn't have anything like 41 megapixels and is purely a clever image processor hooked onto the back of a far more humble resolution sensor.
More interestingly (and completely unmentioned in the article) is the flash, it's hard to tell from the picture, and I could be getting my hopes up here, but is that a *real* xenon flash tube there?
iPad owners 'considerably richer than yow'
Re: Confirming the demographic
I think you are under estimating Apple's marketing.
There is a whole other demographic which partake in the distortion field.
MCTS - More credit than sense.
Apple files patent for 'polished meteorite' keyboard
"Scissor-switch keys provide fine feedback, but are so 20th-century chubby"
Then long levers must be 19th century, if not 18th.
Feds apply for DNSChanger safety net extension
Turning off the replacement DNS servers will prevent the infected (and unprotected) machines from resolving any URLs... Therefore protecting them from hurting themselves further, or sending more spam.
Sounds like a win win for the rest of the intarweb. Pull the plug!
GPS jamming rife, could PARALYSE Blighty, say usual suspects
We did indeed, and IIRC the outcome was that it was trivially easy to block (simple RF interference would do it), but more complicated to spoof.
60 block/spoofs in 6 months isn't much. That could almost be due to accidental interference, or depending on the locations of these listeners, be down to the spooks and their anti tracking measures.
If the 6 months happened to included a visit from Mr Obama, I'd put money on the latter.
For those thinking Private Cloud
See me after school...
"They're remit is 'be helpful' "
Dell Latitude E6220 12.5in Core i7 notebook
"when it comes to rolling up your sleeves and updating various websites, using content management systems and working on long documents, you need a proper keyboard"
And more than a 768 pixel high screen!
Sounds like a bit of a premium netbook to me. You could treat yourself to a Sony SE series lappy with a full HD screen and an i7 for less £££...
Man surfs slopes at night in LED suit
He's not the stig...
... but he is the Stig's radioactive cousin!
Satnav blunders blamed for £200m damages
Re: Its a Tool FFS
Exactly my thoughts Captain.
Before I set off I make sure I at least have a rough idea where I'm going, and what direction it is in.
This ancient technique came in handy on Malta recently, no sat nav, and they don't believe in signs before roundabouts telling you where each exit goes. If you are lucky they will have each exit labelled on the roundabout itself, but don't count on it. Luckily 'tis a small island, and keeping an eye on the sun keeps you going in roughly the right compass direction... I guess the satnav zombie would be all over the road purely so they can keep the sun in sight if they tried this technique!
Bung a tenner to a mate's mobile number with new Barclays app
Re: Tried it on my phone
I didn't have any interest in this gimmick until you said this, but now I try it I see the same problem.
I might have a play about later and see if I can stop it detecting the root.
Pope's PR says Vatican in grip of WikiLeaks-style scandal
It also has more than a passing resemblance to Terry Pratchett's Unseen University where promotion is via "Dead man's shoes".
China clamps down on foreign telly on its channels
Where? WHERE? Tell me!
I wanna emigrate!
Space: 1999 returning to TV?
I thought one of the other critical parts of a planet classification was the ability to retain an atmosphere?
"It told the story of boffins working on Moonbase Alpha who were propelled into fantastic adventures beyond imagination after a massive nuclear explosion on the moon on 13 September 1999 sent our little satellite planet into deep space."
Our little satellite planet? No. The Moon orbits planet Earth, so it is a moon. Planets orbit the sun. Moons orbit planets. Once it was blown out of earth orbit and shot out across space it still wasn't orbiting the sun, so I guess it became a sodding great asteroid.
Still not a planet.
Germany stalls over ACTA treaty ratification
Bit of a difference between UKIP and the BNP. (Can't comment on the SNP, although they do look amusing on the TV). UKIP are for the UK's interests and against the EU bureaucratic steam roller.
Given the way national governments go round implementing pretty much anything which comes out of Brussels you would be forgiven for wondering why we both to pay for all their second homes and duck houses.
I think that was the original posters point, most countries have a "no using the mobile phone whilst driving" law, despite them all having a "driving without undue care and attention" catch-all law on the statute books already which allows the cops to prosecute anyone for anything which they think is dangerous from eating a sandwich to receiving oral pleasure.
Unfortunately they don't seem to ever apply it to parents with screaming kids on the back seat, possibly the most distracted and dangerous drivers I see.
Iran draws veil over secure internet access
My thoughts exactly... We can't read it, so it must be bad.
Someone need to throw a big roll of cat5 over the border into a neighbouring stable country... Oh, yes, sorry, I see the problem now.
Revealed: Apple's plea for fairness in mobile patent war
29 up and 0 down.
Not a single down vote to a post which takes a dig at Apple and the US patent office?
Don't tell me the fanboys have actually started to see the light!
IT guy answers daughter's Facebook rant by shooting her laptop
Come America, solving every problem with a gun? It's getting boring now, be a bit more inventive.
Personally I like thermite. Unfortunately that's getting a little popular too.
How about covering it in blood and going shark fishing?
IT crowd sorts out the Mars Science Lab
Seriously impressive remote maintenance.
Then again, the standard expenses mileage allowance would have bankrupted them if they had had to send out an engineer.
Met thumbed through Oyster card data up to 22,000 times in 4 years
@Thomas 4
Gonna be a lot of that when the Olympics arrives.
I hate to be the one defending the met...
...but... that's not many requests given the number of little twerps we have kicking about in London. Can't wait for them to all centre on Stratford for the Olympics.
Plus the information could be used to defend yourself from prosecution...
Cop: You have been identified by a witness as the person that stabbed Mr Bloggs on Friday night
Me: Can't be, I was 25 miles away.
Cop: Can you prove it?
Me: Check with my Oyster and the CCTV of the same time. See, I was 25 miles away just 5 minutes before he was stabbed.
Cop: Thank you Sir, you can go.
(We're still keeping that DNA sample though).
Ofcom: Make it easier for punters to switch ISPs
It gets worse...
I'm getting an engineer visit to install a Type B Home Hub 3 to replace the type A one I currently have (which has 101 bugs).
I've tried telling them I don't need an engineer to install a silly little router, and that I program Cisco routers and firewalls for "fun" in the office, but no, I need to wait for their approved replacer of boxes (Kelly Communications) to come and do it for me.
Which means I have to sit in all morning or afternoon and hope he turns up... Unlike the one who was supposed to to the initial install last year.
Olympus goes retro with µFT snapper
You could buy a "real" camera for that money... And from a manufacturer who will still be trading in two years time...
Parliament ponders £400,000 iPads-for-MPs plan
Upgraded within 5 years? I'll be amazed if 50% haven't been left in the back of taxis within 6 months.
Toshiba releases 'world's thinnest' Android tablet
Not required, I'm sure their legal department have already climbed from their coffins and are just waiting for the sun to drop below the horizon.
Mac OS X ARM port by Apple work experience kid revealed
Porting an OS to an completely different chip in 12 weeks is no mean feat.
No surprise they offered him a job!
NASA: Solar system may have alien origin
Sleeping with the light on would be a mistake. You'll only be helping it photosynthesise!
I would say essential!
Seagate slam-dunks flood-hit rivals with triple-profit Q2
"notched up a brilliant second 2012 quarter"
More impressively, the seem to have nailed time travel!
The rest of us have only just got into February 2012!
OFFICIAL: Smart meters won't be compulsory
Who wants to bet...
It won't be compulsory, but those that install them get a discounted tariff... Sorry, I mean those that don't install them suddenly find there tariff rate increases, and the new cheaper one (the original tariff price) is only available to those that say yes to the meter.
I might say yes, just to see their reaction when they discover the mobile signal in the cupboard under my stairs... I have to put my mobile on a window ledge to get a signal, and even then it's hit and miss.
Even if it does get a signal, a remote switch off can be easily prevented by some strategic use of tinfoil (no not on your head you nut!).
Mozilla releases Firefox 10, adds developer tools
"According to Mozilla, most add-ons will now work by default"
Curiously I was offered this upgrade about an hour ago... It told me the FDM (free download manager) integration wasn't compatible, and it would be disabled.
So I declined it's offer for the time being.
iPads propel Apple to PC market top slot
Some dubious categorisation going on here. An iPad isn't really a PC in the same way that a G-Wizz isn't really a car!
Sure it can do many of the things a PC can do, play videos, go onto facebook, and maybe it fits the words "personal computer" better than a real desktop does, but it's still a device primarily designed for data consumption, not production. Sure, you *could* type your entire life story on an iPad, and I'm sure Mr Fry is doing just that as I type, but you'll end up with blunted fingers and probably some kind of compression fracture in all of your fingers from banging on that sheet of glass.
It's horses for courses. Most people don't really need a real desktop PC for what they do. I know my sister-in-law certainly doesn't. She can post up her inane facebook drivel (with humourous auto corrections) just as well from her phone than she can from a desktop of laptop machine.
It just goes to show that many desktop/laptop users didn't really need that full computer experience, so with any luck we'll shift them onto tablet, and the volume of spam email their infected desktop machines were spewing to all and sundry will plummet!
Steerable bullet aims for mass army deployment
There is a difference between showing yourself and *showing* yourself. Sure the guy with the pointer will need line of site to the target, but that doesn't necessarily reveal him. There will be no muzzle flash from the pointer, the bullet will come from elsewhere. As soon as they start coming in I doubt any of the targets will give any thought to the unarmed man one of their team thought he saw 5 minutes ago wandering about at 45 degrees to them.
Many of the "smart" bombs in Iraq were guided in by laser. Sometimes painted from other aircraft, but often painted by forces on the ground.
Re: modulation
Sounds like a perfect defence is to stand behind a mirror. The dot won't be scattered back to the bullet, but reflected onto a nearby wall or the ground.
Angry Birds boss: Piracy helps us 'get more business'
I believe Chris is referring to patents, were you have to defend them or risk losing them.
Paris Metro brings a bit of style to NFC
A bit of style?
That'll be the first on the Paris Metro then... It's like being driven round in an old tin can from the 1920s!
'Space Monkey' craze: Texan students 'get high' by choking each other
That sounds alarming like a boys boarding school activity to me!
Dizzy: the Ultimate Cartoon Adventure Part Deux
Others are from the spectrum version, you can tell from the horrible colour attribute bleeding and simplified border to try to avoid it. The CPC's video chip was the far more capable 6845 which it shared with the BBC Micro.
Women pick the family's mobile tech - and pay for it too
That explains it. No wonder I could never understand the iThings sale figures ;-)
HP hawks huge 132in 'tablet'
$125,000? I think I'll wait until they abandon the project and then pick up the old stock for 25% list price.
Woz praises Android, blasts iPhone limitations
Hey, move over, there must be more space behind the sofa, stop hogging it all!
McDonald's punters offered sex in exchange for Chicken McNuggets
I would...
I would say "Picture or it didn't happen", but anyone that desperate for chicken nuggets is not going to be a pretty sight.
Tiny frog claimed as smallest vertebrate ever
Depends, does it generally look shifty and do a lot of shrugging?
Stratfor slaps website back online after Anon mega-hack
Tut tut...
Storing credit card details in an unencrypted form is against the merchant card program rules. It certainly is in Europe. Failure to abide by the rules (especially a failure such as this where data was stolen) can result in withdrawal of your card processing facility.
As for the CEO resigning, I guess he is just taking the behaviour of our leaders as an example. Nobody in any lofty position carries any responsibility. On the rare occasions that one is forced out by massive public protest (RBS for example), they still walk away with a "jolly well done" handshake measured in the millions.
ICANN snubs critics, opens domain extension floodgates
Lucky none of us trust any banks these days!
Maybe they could be encouraged to get their own TLD, .con?
The post is required, and must contain letters.
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subset: commoncrawl


text:
Find records of Bandar Alqahtani
Find birth, death, marriage, military, and other records of Bandar F Alqahtani at Ancestry.com.Search for records
Biography & Family History Add details
Bandar F Alqahtani (2001 - 2002) was born on July 12, 2001. Bandar was born into the Alqahtani family.
There are no known marriages or children on record for Bandar. Bandar died on September 1, 2002 at 1 years old.
We were able tofind a death record for Bandar F Alqahtani in the United States Social Security Master Death Index (SSDI). The death certificate for this record has been observed. This data can be considered accurate. What is the SSDI?
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- Facilities & Hours
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- About Us
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The Student Recreation Center is our flagship facility. With more than 400,000 square feet of recreation space, there is something for everyone at "The Rec."
Locker Room Renovation
Due to the renovation of the locker room, all belongings in every locker in the Men's Locker Room will need to be cleared by closing (8pm) on Wednesday, Nov. 26. A $10 fee will be assessed to retrieve items that are not cleared. The Men's Locker Room will not be accessible after Wednesday, Nov. 26. Alternative shower and changing facilities will be provided.
*Facility hours are subject to change.


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4Yr old still getting upset going to nursery(13 Posts)
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Go down the release notes and see what works for you?
Moodle 2.0 release notes - MoodleDocs
I have been playing for a while with Moodle 2.0.
I have upgraded a copy of our 1.9 installation with no problems.
I have also created a brand new install as a demo fro some Primary school in our region who might be looking for an alternative.
After all the playing I can't find any "features" that I can sell to staff.
Can anyone think of any selling points?
I am finding it awesome - repositories make it so much easier to handle files...I appreciate it maybe a technical selling point but still a valid one. The best selling point is still of course that it is free!
The repositories are fantastic - mount your shared drives, no more uploading single files.
Google docs integration as a file repository, dropbox etc for portfolios
- conditional activities, ie students can only progress once they reach a criteria, is a really sought after feature from our staff as it can enable individual learning plans
I'm not at the moment as I just couldn't bring myself to inflict the pain of anything, however small, changing for staff. Over the summer I will probably upgrade & I think it will solve a large portion of our problems but I can imagine the up roar if I did it mid term.
Repositories! Not sure why but I can't get the flickr public, flickr or google ones to work. Has anyone else?
Last edited by reggiep; 16th March 2011 at 10:00 AM.
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International Journal of Advances in Engineering Sciences and Applied Mathematics
Special Issue on Multi-terminal Information Theory (Scheduled for March 2013)
Guest Editors: Andrew Thangaraj and Srikrishna Bashyam, Electrical Engineering Department, Indian Institute of Technology Madras; E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.com
Information theory, founded by Shannon in the 1940s, has today grown to be an important part of communication system design. In a point-to-point channel, where a single transmitter attempts to communicate to a single receiver, the fundamental limits on communication rate predicted by information theory can be practically achieved by codes such as turbo and low-density parity-check codes. However, in several wireless communication systems, there are often scenarios where multiple transmitters send information to multiple receivers simultaneously. In such multi-terminal scenarios, fundamental limits and coding schemes are still being actively researched. In this thematic volume, we seek papers that will bring out multi-terminal information theory in the current state of the art.
Special Issue on Advanced Traffic and Transportation Systems (Scheduled for 2nd half of 2013)
Guest Editors: Lelitha Vanajakshi, Gitakrishnan Ramadurai, and Karthik K. Srinivasan, Department of Civil Engineering, Indian Institute of Technology Madras; E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.com
Cities all over the world are facing substantial problems of increased congestion on the roadways, and associated deterioration in
- 6 Volumes
- 14 Issues
- 114 Articles
- 2009 - 2014 Available between
Latest Articles
Effect of surface roughness and surface energy on molten fly ash deposition
S. Balakrishnan, R. Nagarajan (June 2014)
Development of super luminescent diode based sensing technique for multiple-gas monitoring
K. Sulochana, K. Akash, M. Kumaravel… (June 2014)
FTIR characterization of soot precursor nano-particles from different heights of an isooctane/air premixed flame
Bireswar Paul, Amitava Datta (June 2014)
- Journal Title
- International Journal of Advances in Engineering Sciences and Applied Mathematics
- Coverage
- Volume 1 / 2009 - Volume 6 / 2014
- Print ISSN
- 0975-0770
- Online ISSN
- 0975-5616
- Publisher
- Springer India
- Additional Links
Continue reading...
To view the rest of this content please follow the download PDF link above.


text:
Villefranche-sur-Mer Villa Rental Photos and Description
close to the old village, beaches and stores unique Provencal house recently renovated with a magnificent view towards Villefranche's bay. being enclosed and very calm. prefect to welcome a family and very charming!
possible rental for several weeks
- Suitability:
- pets not allowed


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Find records of Samuel Owens
Find birth, death, marriage, military, and other records of Samuel Dwain Owens at Ancestry.com.Search for records
Biography & Family History Add details
Samuel Dwain Owens (1944 - 2006) was born on May 5, 1944. He was born into the Owens family.
Samuel had no spouses. Samuel died on March 5, 2006 at 61 years old.
Samuel Dwain Owens's last known residence is at Grand Prairie, Dallas County, Texas.
This record of Samuel Dwain Owens comes from the United States Social Security Death Index. The death certificate for this record has been observed. This data can be considered accurate. What is the SSDI?
This genealogy of Samuel Dwain Owens's past is a collaborative effort by AncientFaces members Share what you know to connect with the people who knew him. Some common things we would like to know about Samuel's genealogy:
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- Last Known Residence
- Grand Prairie, Dallas County, Texas
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- Male
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Possible Relatives
- Capp Owens
- ·
- Bertha M Owens
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- Leroy Owens
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- Lenora Owens
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- Shelley R Owens
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- B G Owens
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- Evelyn F Owens
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- Michael G Owens
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- Ira Owens
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- Timothy K Owens
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- Sharon E Owens
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- Marion Geneva Owens
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- Ronnie G Owens
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- Susie H Owens
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- Ira Owens
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Amanda Seyfried interview
Chloe actress gets in touch with her dark side Discuss this article
- Picture 1 of 2
Golden-maned Hollywood actress Amanda Seyfried stars in Chloe, a remake of 2004 French film Natalie…, due out in cinemas across the city from August 11. Alongside an A-list cast including Julianne Moore and Liam Neeson as the film's central married couple, 25-year-old Seyfried plays a young girl hired to test Neeson's fidelity, though the situation soon becomes far murkier than anticipated. Here, Seyfried tells us how she got to grips with the character of Chloe in this intriguing thriller.
Were you worried about any of the more intimate scenes in the film?
I was worried I wasn't capable of being able to nail [the scenes] the way that it was written and also the way Atom [Egoyan, the director] wanted them to be played. The film is a study of a marriage, and a woman who feels lost and like she doesn't know exactly how her husband sees her any more. It's just so realistic. Then the way things unravel are so unexpected. I've never seen this before in a movie. My character is also one that won't come up very often for someone my age.
How do you think your fans see you in Chloe after your less taxing roles in films such as Dear John?
Hopefully they'll see me as an actress instead of just a 'sweetheart'. Now I feel as though I have a seriousness factor. Eight-year-old kids aren't going to be able to watch every movie and every character I play. Some variety is what I really need, and what I've been able to attain with this. Letters to Juliet is another fluff piece, not to criticise it at all. It's a wonderful romantic movie with amazing actors in it. But it was 'me' whereas Chloe is not 'me', and that's more challenging. I think the more terrifying a role seems, the more fulfilling it'll always be when you're doing it.
What did you learn from working with Julianne Moore?
I learned that it's really important to observe the other actors you're working with when they're not on camera. I realised that if you're really well prepared before you start shooting, there's no reason to take everything so seriously when you're on set. I don't feel as much of a fraud now. I always wondered: does everyone just 'jump' into the character? Is that the way it is for everybody? Julianne would have these light-hearted conversations, then Atom would call 'action' and we'd just jump into these intense moments where we were playing [emotional] ping-pong off each other.
You must have placed a lot of trust in the director with some of the scenes.
I don't know if I could've done the movie if I wasn't working with someone like Atom. It lent itself to a very specific type of director, and Atom could tap into everything that was happening. The storyline is crazy, but Atom just got it. He sees it all. His brain is really big and I don't know how he organises himself – but he does.
Your character, Chloe, is a bit of a chameleon. Do you think in another life she'd be an actress?
I think she's acting all the time. But I think what makes the audience love her is that they see the vulnerability shining through. You really see her raw at some points, and that's good.
What was it like to work with Liam Neeson?
Oh, he's amazing. He's just like Julianne. They fit together perfectly. I didn't work with him very much; I wish I'd had more scenes with him. The scenes I had with him were amazing. They were awkward, but also easy.
It's been said this film is your 'moment'. Is your career at take-off point?
I really don't know. When people say that, it just means I have a movie that went [to number] one at the box office. I wish it had more to do with my work, but I do think Chloe is finally something that's going to raise the bar. When people say that I'm having a 'moment' it scares me because moments last for, what, a moment?
But it could be a turning point.
I hope this is a turning point; that people will say, 'Okay, she's doing something different.' And isn't that the trick, moving to something that's going to challenge you even more?
Chloe is in UAE cinemas from August 11.
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Latest Kmart weekly sales circular: 50% off Color ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Black Friday 2014 Ad – LEGO Sets or All Footwear on Sale!
Kmart Black Friday 2014 Ad Best Deals: 40% OFF All ... [ Read More ]
Kmart pre-Black Friday Ad November 23 – 26, 2014. RCA 40″ Class LED HDTV
Check out the best Kmart pre-Black Friday 2014 ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Sale Ad November 16 – 22, 2014. Jaclyn Smith Christmas Trees Sale!
This week best deals: 50% OFF Jaclyn Smith ... [ Read More ]
Kmart This Week Ad November 9 – 15, 2014. Snow Boots on Sale!
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Kmart Ad November 2 – 8, 2014. Up To 30% Off Family Outwear Sale!
Latest deals: up to 30% off Family outwear; $26.24 ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Weekly Ad 10/26/ – 11/01/2014. Halloween Sale
Current Kmart weekly specials: $12.99 Children's ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Sale Ad Oct 19 – Oct 25, 2014. Halloween Costumes And Capes
Best savings: up to 40% off All Halloween costumes ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Ad October 12 – 18, 2014. Dollar Days Sale
Current Kmart online weekly ads: $15 Children's ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Circular 10/05 – 10/11/2014. Family BOGO Event
Latest Kmart ad specials: B1G1 50% off Kids' ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Weekly Ad 09/28 – 10/04/14. Family Footwear Sale
This week Kmart ad: B1G1 for $1 all family ... [ Read More ]
Kmart Weekly Specials 09/21 – 09/27/14. Icon Reading Glasses
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Kmart (sometimes stylized as K-Mart), is an American chain of discount stores headquartered in the United States. The chain purchased Sears in 2005, forming a new corporation under the name Sears Holdings Corporation.
The company was founded in 1962 and is the third largest discount store chain in the world, behind Walmart and Target, with stores in the United States, Puerto Rico, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and Guam (which houses the world's largest Kmart).
As of January 29, 2011, Kmart operated a total of 1,307 (6 closing by early 2011) Kmart stores across 49 states, Guam, Puerto Rico, and the U.S. Virgin Islands. This store count included 1,278 discount stores, averaging 93,000 sq ft (8,600 m2), and 29 Super Centers, averaging 169,000 sq ft (15,700 m2).
Kmart is a chain of discount stores that are usually free-standing or located in strip malls. They carry electronics, music, movies, bedding, household hardware, sporting goods, clothing, toys, jewelry, office supplies, health and beauty products, home decor, and a limited selection of food items. Many stores also have a garden center, a Jackson Hewitt tax center, a pharmacy, and usually a K-Cafe or a deli serving Nathan's Hot Dogs and pizza. Kmart stores range from 80,000–110,000 sq ft (7,400–10,000 m2). Some of these stores were converted into Super Kmart, and most of them were converted into Big Kmart. Urban multilevel variants of a Kmart store are located in Middle Village, Queens, New York; Southbury, Connecticut; and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
If you are interested in knowing more about the company, its statements, products, and special offers or discounts, please visit www.kmart.com.
On iWeeklyAds you will find the latest Kmart weekly ad and weekly circular, online, on a single place.


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Tampa Bay also owes Revis $3 million for offseason in bonuses Jason Cole
The reported hiring of Lovie Smith by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers has led to immediate speculation about the future of cornerback Darrelle Revis with the team. However, there are two critical issues to recognize.
First, of the $16 million that Revis is owed each season over the next five years, $3 million is tied to the offseason. According to the contract, Revis receives $1.5 million on the third day of the league year each season (that will be March 14 this year) and receives another $1.5 million for participating in the offseason workout program.
In addition, the Buccaneers already have it written into the contract that they can convert any or all of the remaining $13 million in base salary to signing bonus in order to reduce Revis' cap number and spread the cost of his contract over the remaining years.
If the Bucs are going to make a move to get rid of Revis, they will have to do it early and would do it despite having the ability to easily reduce his contract by a significant amount in the short-term.
Second, and perhaps just as important from a psychological standpoint, the move to trade for Revis last offseason was done with the Glazer family fully on board, multiple sources have said repeatedly. The move was not simply done at the behest of former coach Greg Schiano and General Manager Mark Dominik, who were fired Monday.
In other words, even if Smith believes he doesn't need Revis, he will have to prove to ownership why it's a good idea to dump a player after one season when the team just traded a first-round pick and a third-round pick for the player less than a year ago.
That's to say nothing of the idea that Smith may view Revis the same way many other teams view him … as the best cornerback in football right now.
Follow me on Twitter @JasonPhilColehttp://www.twitter.com/jasonphilcole
NFP's Introduction to Scouting Class is now registering for our Winter sessions! Save $200 if you register before December 1st! REGISTER NOW!
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Tampa Bay wide receiver has a TD in four straight games.
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Will there be first ballot Hall of Famers in 2015?
A detailed look at the eight candidates vying for that unique honor.
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Cleveland quarterback Brian Hoyer has overcome long odds to put his team in contention for a playoff berth.


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The search continues for missing Michigan mother, Jessica Heeringa, who vanished on April 26, 2013. Heeringa was working the nightshift alone at an Exxon Gas...
Where is Jessica Heeringa?
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I4U News is feeding your Geek Mind. The Geek Mind is concerned with life, in all its different forms and facets.
The geek mind wants to know about societal and financial issues, both abroad and at home. If a Fortune 500 decides to raise their minimum wage, or any high priority news, the geek mind wants to know.
The geek mind wants to know the top teams in the National Football League, or who's likely to win the NBA Finals this coming year.
The geek mind wants to know who the hottest new models are, or whether the newest blockbuster movie is worth seeing. The geek mind wants to know.Read more.


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FC Edmonton v New York Cosmos
Similar imagesView all
Sebastian Guenzatti of the New York Cosmos and Albert Watson of FC... News Photo 185441420Albert Watson,Ball,Celebrities,Club Soccer,Hempstead,Hofstra University,Horizontal,New York Cosmos,New York State,Soccer,Sport,USAPhotographer Mike StobeCollection: New York Cosmos 2013 Getty ImagesHEMPSTEAD, NY - OCTOBER 20: Sebastian Guenzatti #13 of the New York Cosmos and Albert Watson #5 of FC Edmonton vie for the ball at Hofstra University on October 20, 2013 in Hempstead, New York. Cosmos and Edmonton ply to a 1-1 tie. (Photo by Mike Stobe/Getty Images for New York Cosmos)


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School Holidays Special - Save up to 38% or $143
The School Holidays have come and now is the time to enjoy the moment. Here at BIG4 Shepparton Park Lane we know how to WOW. Our new kids Tyre Maze is the only one in any Australian Holiday Park – it will be sure to keep the kids busy! Amongst SPC Ardmona Kidstown and the councils best regional resort style pool facilities in Victoria, you will have plenty to do and see. Our Park is "where memories are created". We are perfect for holiday makers with the park immaculately kept, set in a quiet location. With vibrant people and only 6 minutes from the CBD, this is a magnificent place to stay. You will be glad that you have stayed at a Park Lane Park with Jumping Pillows and Pedal Go-Karts. BIG4 Shepparton Park Lane Holiday Park is the best choice when staying at Shepparton.
Offer includes:
- First two kids stay FREE!
- 10% discount on accommodation
- 1x hour of Wifi Internet Access
- 2x hours on Pedal Go-Karts
- Discount Dining & Experience Vouchers
- Choose your style of accommodation to suit your budget (below prices include all extras).
- 2 Bedroom Luxury Villa – $261 for 2 nights (savings of 35% or $143)
- 2 Bedroom Deluxe Cabin – $230 for 2 nights (savings of 38% or $140)
Book by:
31 July 2013
Important details:
- All prices include up to 2 adults and 2 children, for a minimum 2 night stay.
- Extra person charges apply for each additional person. Extra person rate applies if more than 2 adults and 2 children.
- No further discounts apply, subject to availability.
- Valid from 1/07/2013 to 31/07/2013.
View other holiday deals at BIG4 Shepparton Park Lane Holiday Park


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Blizzcon style event called Codemasters Online Connect 2008 (that's just not a sexy name) featuring its lineup of MMO games. Attendees will log into the real world at Omega Sektor in Birmingham, England on March 14 and 15 to log right back out again on 400 PCs running various Codemaster Online games. Alternatively, they can stick around the real world a little bit for round-table discussions and pose questions to the "Codemasters Online team." Ticket prices have yet to be announced.
The event will showcase games already out like Lord of the Rings Online and Dungeons & Dragons Online, and will apparently offer some game announcements. So, if you're looking for a Blizzcon featuring the second tier MMOs currently on the market, get ready to pack your bags for Birmingham.
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Hi everyone!
It's FRIDAY and it's time for a new Fabby Friday over at Tiddly Inks!
I just LOVE these days of the month - I get to really be creative and use whatever stamp I want on my project!
This week I'm using Thanks a Latte:
Aren't they just SOOO stinking adorable?! I really love coffee-themed stamps (And as I get older, I'm finding I'm reaching for a cup of coffee more and more often! LOL), so this one is super special to me. :)
And I LOVE how it turned out!
Be sure to stop by the Tiddly Inks Challeng blog to check out the creations of the rest of the design team and be sure to play along with our current challenge "Rememberance/Honor"!
Thanks for stopping by!


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Microsoft job listings reveal Zune expansion plan, and Musiwave's role
Send this to a friend
- Todd Bishop
At this point, it's clear that Microsoft plans to expand its Zune initiative beyond the current music device, software and service. The question is how. With the Zune Phone rumors fading into the background, for now, the focus has turned to the company's plans to expand Zune capabilities to Windows Mobile devices, a strategy that Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer acknowledged this fall.
But beyond those comments, the company has been quiet about its plans. Unless you look at its job listings.
"Zune Services is building an entertainment store for a wide range of Zune clients or 'tuners,' " reads a Dec. 2 posting for a Web services development job. "Today these tuners include the Windows PC client, the Zune web site and the Zune device; in the future there will be more. Each of these tuners access a set of rich web services implemented by Zune and soon by Musiwave as well."
Musiwave is the Paris-based mobile music and entertainment services provider that Microsoft struck an agreement to acquire last year. Mobile operators such as Orange, Vodafone and T-Mobile use Musiwave for ringtones, music and other content. At the time of the announcement, Microsoft said it would use the Musiwave technology to help various elements of its "connected entertainment" strategy.
The job postings, published to Microsoft's careers page in the past few weeks, give new clues about the Zune expansion and suggest a significant Musiwave role. Some also convey a sense of urgency.
"The Zune organization is making a strategic change from a 3rd party content provider to in-house," reads a Dec. 2 posting for a software development job in Microsoft's Musiwave subsidiary. "We need to rebuild, re-architect, and revitalize a content ingestion pipeline that powers the entire Zune business. And we have a very short time to do it."
"We're building a team in Redmond to help power Zune Marketplace," reads another listing. "This job would work towards the overall strategy and collaborate closely with the Zune Redmond team and the Musiwave Paris team."
A blurb from another listing: "As Musiwave powers Zune Marketplace, we'll need to 'ingest' data from multiple sources and process it in a way that's optimal for Zune to show to the users. We'll also continue to look at new types of data we can load into our system and expose to make music in Zune an ever richer experience."
And another: "For the record labels, Music is a business and in order to let consumers enjoy music in new and interesting ways, Zune has to license music from the labels implement certain controls. To enable new experiences with Music, we're hiring a developer to understand these requirements and implement them for Zune's music offering."
It's interesting stuff, and a sneak peak of what we're likely to see from the company at some point in the coming months.
But the underlying question remains: Even expanded to Windows Mobile phones, will the Zune initiative have what it takes to become a more credible rival to Apple's iPod, iPhone and the iTunes store?
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