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How to Become a Model Photographer in Brazil 389 Comments
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
Before hiring one of my assistants, Charlie, I asked him where he wanted to be in 6 and 12 months.
I made him define what he wanted to have and what he wanted to do in both timeframes. At the top of the list was a mini-retirement to Thailand or South America.
Done and done.
Charlie just returned three weeks ago from Buenos Aires. It was there he developed a rather keen interest in Brazilian girls, who were visiting Argentina as tourists. Two weeks ago at around 2am, while preparing the new book launch at my house, he somehow accidentally (riiiiight) got stuck in a Flickr slideshow of Brazilian models.
The photos belonged to someone named Jeremiah Thompson.
Digging a little deeper, it turned out that Jeremiah had an incredible story. Two years ago, he decided he wanted to become a professional photographer of Brazilian bikini models. That, and he wanted to get married. Despite the fact that he was from Montana and had no training, he made both happen in record time.
This is his story…
An Interview with Jeremiah Thompson
What's your background?
I was born in Missoula, Montana, a small college town in the heart of the Rocky Mountains. My Dad was a colonel in the Army so I grew up all over the place, including a couple of stints in Germany. I definitely have a strong entrepreneurial background and have been in business in one form or another all my life, starting at a very young age. The internet has helped me open up a number of businesses.
Did you have much experience as a photographer?
If I thought I could make it rich taking photos, I would have gone into this profession a long time ago. But really, photography has always just been a hobby.
How did you choose Brazil as your destination?
Learning how to surf was, believe it or not, a real stepping stone in my life. About four years ago, I learned how to surf behind an artificial wave put up by a wakeboarding boat. I really got into the sport and wanted to carry my surfing aspirations into the ocean. I narrowed my choices down to Australia and Brazil. A 15-minute phone call to Hans Keeling of Nexus Surf convinced me that Florianopolis, Brazil would be the perfect place for me to go.
[Editor: Some of you might recall that Hans, a recovered ex-lawyer, is a case study in The 4-Hour Workweek]
How did the calendar idea come about?
Arriving in Florianopolis in January of 2008, I was amazed by the sheer quantity of beautiful women — they were everywhere! I'd always had this dream of photographing models, so it was a perfect opportunity to make that dream come true. I coined the calendar name "Girls of Brazil" and so the adventure began. Then I just needed to find the models.
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
So, how and where did you find the models?
The first model really set everything into motion.
I was hanging out with Hans Keeling (the owner of Nexus Surf) at Praia Mole Beach, when we passed a super sexy woman working at a fresco paddle rental stand. I had already mentioned my swimsuit calendar idea to Hans, and he happens to speak perfect Portuguese. I asked him if he would help me talk to her and pitch the idea. At this point, I had no product or business cards — just a pair of board shorts, my camera, and some photos of wildlife I had taken in Montana. But that was all I needed. It worked. She agreed to meet me the next day! She was even going to hitchhike to my house at 5:00 AM! I convinced her to let me pick her up, and we shot the next day from 5:30 AM till 8:30 PM. It was a great start to my project.
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
After that, I found most of the girls on my own, speaking to them in very basic (if not completely broken) Portuguese. I was able to find girls almost everywhere – at the beaches, clubs, supermarkets, walking down the street, and even online. It was too easy. Once I had a few great shots under my belt, I was able to show these same photos to other girls, and most wanted to participate just to get their own pictures taken.
Were they professional models?
The girls were, for the most part, your everyday gals. I did shoot one girl who was actually an international model. I found her while I was driving down the street. I jumped out of my car, chased after her, and asked if she wanted to participate. You would think someone like that would laugh at me, but she ended up making the photos:
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
Quite a few of the models had experience as event girls. I had the best luck finding those girls online.
But my best photos came from the girls with no professional experience. They always came to the shoots with the most energy. Their openness allowed me more freedom to infuse my own ideas into the photo shoot. This definitely made things more fun, and the results were always great.
Did you pay them for the shoots?
During the first year, I never paid any of the models. By the second year, I started paying a little. I had been dating one of the models and she helped me realize that many of the girls were actually using their own money just to prepare for the photos. They were paying to get their hair done, manicures/pedicures, new bikinis, etc. It was expensive. I started paying them 500 Brazilian reais, which amounted to approximately $250 US dollars. And because I shot many of the girls multiple times, it was a very small price to pay. However, I'm convinced that even if I didn't pay anything, I would have just as much success or possibly even more. The girls, especially in the first year, really got excited about the opportunity, even though there was no money involved.
Critics might say you were taking advantage of them. What would you say to that?
One of the cool things about this project is the success they've had using my photos afterward.
Four of the girls went on to pose for Playboy Brasil. One of the girls got hired on as a dancer for the top television show in Brazil on Sunday afternoons. Many got modeling jobs. And they've all appreciated the opportunity, so that's one of the best things about doing this.
Furthermore, it is not as if I was making money myself. The first few years of this project were big losses. Frankly I couldn't afford to pay the girls to participate. This was a project I started more out of my desire to be a swimsuit photographer than to make another dollar. The girls loved the project and the photos. Many participated in multiple years. There weren't any victims here.
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
For those who've dreamed about being a swimsuit photographer but have never had the chance, can you describe the atmosphere of a shoot?
The atmosphere is definitely one of the best things. It starts when the girls come to my house. I need to see them in their bikinis before we head out so I can prepare for the shoot. In the first year, all of the girls used their own bikinis and that worked great 90% of the time. But I started buying bikinis for the girls in year two. So the first step was always to pick out the best bikinis. We would usually find 2-4 bikinis that we would take to the shoot. After that, we either walked to a nearby local beach or took my car to a more private beach.
Usually, we would arrive before sunrise. This meant the girls had been up since 2:30 AM preparing! I typically rolled out of bed around 5:00 AM. Not an easy thing to do, but when the moment comes and those first rays of light hit a beautiful girl in a tiny bikini, it's worth it.
Posing the girls was always the most difficult part. I wanted to bring out the best in each girl. I would put them through as many poses as possible, mentally noting how they looked best. Then when the best lighting conditions occurred, I would get the girls into what I already knew would be their best pose. This system worked great.
After the shoots, the first question from the girls was always: "When will the photos be ready?"
They were thrilled to have shots for their portfolio that would otherwise have cost them at least a week's pay.
Were there any methods you used to produce better results (i.e. humor to loosen up the model, etc.)?
I enjoyed bringing out the genuine smiles of each girl.
Most model photos always have that super serious look, which is supposed to be sexy. I don't know if I'm different in this regard, but I always enjoy seeing a girl's smile more. So for half the photos, I would get the girls smiling their biggest smiles possible, and the other half I would let them revert to that serious but "sexy" look you see in all the magazines. Getting the girls to smile was easy: I would just say "mais sexo!" For two years I thought that phrase meant "sexier!" but I guess it really means "more sex!" So it usually made the girls laugh before going into an even sexier pose. That's how I discovered the girls' natural smile and how great it looked in the photos.
What have been some of the more memorable moments from your shoots?
I've shot something like 30-40 girls now, and there are so many memories with each girl.
Fernanda was my first model and she will always be one of the best memories of this project. Actually, the first photo I took of her is, to this day, one of the best I have ever taken:
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
Then there was Iris, who showed up an hour and a half late to our shoot. We jumped in my car and she changed into her bikini as I sped off. When we arrived at the beach, I quickly put her into a pose, and we made this photo [below] in about 10 minutes. It was not a minute too soon, as the sun set right after.
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
When I think about how much preparation goes into a Sports Illustrated shoot and compare it to some of the photos I've taken, I'm amazed by the results I've had as a one-man operation. It really is a credit to the beauty of these girls and the environment I am working with down in Brazil.
Last but not least, there's Dayana.
She and I ended up getting married, so how could I not mention this as one of my best memories?! We were really connected right from the beginning. It was a goal of mine to find a woman like Dayana to marry, so having this dream come true as a result of this project was incredible, to say the least.
Photo: Jeremiah Thompson
What sales channels have you used for distribution of the calendar?
I've never had the opportunity of getting into the main calendar distribution channels, due to my lateness of releasing the calendars. I learned afterward that most calendars get released almost a year before the calendar year.
That meant the calendar had been shot as early as two years before. Since I was doing this more for fun than to make money, I decided to release the calendars as close to the calendar year as possible. The models were happy with this, as they didn't have to wait two years to see their photos debut. It wasn't smart business on my part, but again, I wasn't doing the project to make the most money.
Having said that, we've enjoyed being one of the top calendars through Amazon for a couple of years now. We're giving "Sports Illustrated" a run for their money (at least with Amazon) and I feel a great amount of pride seeing that and knowing how small my operation is compared to them.
Have you done any unique promotions to get the word out?
In 2009, we sent 20,000 calendars to troops in Iraq and Afghanistan. In 2010, we sent approximately 3,000 (I was working with a bigger personal budget in 2009 than in 2010). I hope to get these numbers back up in future years if I stay involved in the project. I always get troop requests and have a list of soldiers who have already requested their copies for 2011. It feels great helping these guys out. Hopefully seeing the beautiful girls on their walls keeps them motivated to stay strong and finish out their missions safe.
What's the "Girls of Brazil" contest you mentioned to me?
The idea behind the contest is to give someone the chance to live the dream of being a swimsuit photographer. There really is no better place than Brazil for this.
I'd help the lucky winner of this contest along with each step. First, we'll recruit the girls and find the models he'll be shooting. Then I'll give him my camera equipment and teach him how to photograph the girls. The winner will be shooting the girls on his own, but I'll be around if he needs my help. And afterward, we'll celebrate the results "Brazilian style"!
The contest doesn't exist yet, but I'm hoping to get sponsored by a magazine who can feature it. It would make a great story and fill several issues of their magazine with content guys will love.
That sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime experience. If a magazine doesn't pick up the contest, perhaps we can make it happen
So, how did his calendars turn out? Take a look at Girls of Brazil website or visit Amazon. If you want a taste of his photos on Facebook, here's your fix.
Question of the Day (QOD): If you're happily married, how did you meet your husband or wife, and do you think someone could engineer the same? Share in the comments!
Odds and Ends: Blogging Lessons and New Stickers
This post produced a lot of strong responses. Please see my comments below in orange, as well as Jeremiah's. Related to that, here are a few guidelines I follow while blogging:
Blog Lesson 1 – Please Everyone to Interest No One
If this post put your knickers in a twist, before leaving a snarky comment, realize this: when everyone is your customer, no one is your customer. This is true in business and writing. Bloggers often make the mistake of trying to generalize every post to every person. This is slow suicide and results in plain vanilla posts that offend no one and interest roughly the same. Expect that blog to disappear within two years, whether from reader attrition or blogger boredom.
I prefer to write posts that strongly appeal to at least a portion of my readers, and simply rotate to hit different demographics/psychographics with different posts. If I perfectly hit the nail on the head by educating (or entertaining) 20% of my readership, and they share it with their friends, does it matter if I lose 2-5%? Not in my experience. From what I've seen, this is precisely how you build an uberstrong community comprised of readers who actually speak their minds and show an unusual degree of tolerance (by Internet standards, at least).
If you'd like to read the female perspective on the mating and marrying game, here's another post on this very same blog.
Blog Lesson 2- Strategic Redating of Posts
Some of you have asked, where did the last two posts go? The posts on GetGlue stickers and book promotion parties?
Here's the answer: I redated them in WordPress so they wouldn't appear on the homepage. Once time-dependent promotional posts have been up for 48-72 hours, and my core audience has seen them, I redate them, as these posts aren't valuable to new visitors. There's only one chance to make a first impression, so I always want strong stand-alone content to dominate my blog homepage. I'd used redating in this fashion for more than two years. Some bloggers go so far as to ensure one of their most popular posts is always displayed first on the homepage, followed then by their most recent.
Hope that explains things.
Eat drink and be merry. Happy Thanksgiving!
New Stickers – The 4-Hour Body
The 4-Hour Body is almost exactly three weeks away, which means a new sticker from GetGlue! This one is of reader, Nathan. To learn how to get it (and all the others) for free, read this:
Posted on November 25th, 2010
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389 Comments
Hahahahaha, this is absolutely amazing.
As part of OneWorld Award ticket, I was thinking of tacking on a trip to Spain next fall.
After reading this (and Charlie's latest post), I'm seriously reconsidering heading to Buenos Aires or Rio instead.
This blog never ceases to amaze me.
Brazilian girls are super sexy. It is really nice to hear his story on how he got started! It doesn't sound like something I'd personally want to pursue, the whole chasing down women and waking up at 5am thing. But I can see that being a dream for a lot of people! And congratulations on him for marrying a beautiful brazilian model!
great blog post. I totally agree with Johnny. Just last week I have been to Buenos Aires for the 1st time and I also noticed the huge quantity of beautiful brazilian women. But Argentinians are not bad either
I am excited to get one for myself. I will go to Brazil to check it out.
Tim, love the post. The only Brazilian girls I know are the ones who do Brazilian Jujitsu…in general, not the most attractive (yet I'm waiting to be proven wrong). I've always had a thing for darker women. Is that your ideal type too? No blond bombshell?
Sounds too good to be true… I'm sure luck played a factor as well. Cool story though.
He had an idea that he wanted to accomplish, he went for it and he made it happen. Funny how people who are clear on what they want and then go for it, seem to be so much "luckier" than those who just sit around and call them lucky.
To all the people that think luck has a lot to do with this, I have to say, no. A person's willingness to break away from the everyday gridlock is key. I've been to over 60 countries around the World, on a budget of less that $20,000, because I decided that I wanted to experience life differently and I took advantage of all of the many ways to make that happen. Along the way I have also taken pictures of many many beautiful women. Step 1: Buy a DSLR camera. I'll read the rest in your book
"If you will it, it is no dream" (Theodore Herzl)
A great story of starting something small and growing it over time. Didn't hurt that his two main goals were highly synergistic.
I love pretty much anything you post, and this one was no exception. I have been following your advice for some time now, and have self published my first book and am shooting to have book two out by March of 2011.
Your blog has been an inspiration and very educational. I have started my own blog, although it is geared far more towards entertainment than yours which is tyically enlightening your readers in some way.
It is always cool to see someone take an idea and run with it. I am hoping I can follow in Jeremiah's footsteps and accomplishmy goals as he did.
Thanks and keep up the good work.
Darren Michaels
Author of Flipside Erotica: Both SIdes of the Story
Independent Publisher Award Winner 2010 -
Yeah, Brazilian girls are very hot. I wanna go to South America! Just started to snow here in Vancouver and Im dreaming of sunshine…. Soon!
Happy Thanksgiving, this blog was awesome as is all your stuff brother, thanks for keeping it creative, fun and never Dull! Go Models! lol
I think it's sweet that Jeremiah followed his passion and everything came to fruition as a result. May we all be so lucky!
Another Great Case Study
Cool story! The hard part would be choosing which bikini model to marry!!
Thanks for sharing Tim,
Stu -
This was a great story! You can tell just through Jeremiah's answers that he is happy and full of life. I'm sure having beautiful Brazilian's around you for a job wouldn't hurt, either.
However, I feel that modelling isn't an easy job. He makes it sound so easy and pleasurable. I wonder if there's tough times? Times when he's frustrated? I've been involved in a photo shoot and I did not enjoy it one bit…. -
An inspiring story… living a dream.
I'm sitting here with a silly grin on my face not because of scantily clad girls rolling around on a beach but because I had a revelation on the bus… FINALLY got an idea for a muse. I am not a business type at all and I have been stuck on this stage for months. Been despairing a little bit too.
I am so happy today! Thanks Tim. I know you've moved on to four-hour erections and cat vomit but I'm still focused on the FHWW! I cannot express how much it's helped me to have someone set out ideas that I hadn't quite formed on my own.
Best of luck for your book launch. I will buy it once it's stocked in Singapore. It's the least I can do.
Still smiling here… even though I'm at work.
Now there is some inspiration to learn another language!
Nice work Jeremiah, and Tim, thanks for sharing the story.
As a 24yr old, single, handsome and charming man…..I think I'm going to go ahead and book my ticket to Brazil ASAPTUALLY. Haha in all seriousness, this is a great post. I will be heading out to travel the world within they year. I'm absolutely looking forward to getting into some trouble while making some money.
These ladies have me "Speaking in tongues" LOL
Just when I thought my thanksgiving couldn't get any better. Thank you for the post sir!
love the post, I think this is a real inspirational post to go and pursuit what you want and what you dream. Personally I would love to live on the beach [Playa del Carmen, México] but at the moment I'm working on my E for elimination… and hope I soon get to the Liberation part done!
Thanks Tim.
Let's take it one step further… "How to Marry a Rich Brazilian Model." I'll keep you guys posted
Tim: It would be interesting to know what percentage of your core readers are single or married…
Question for Jeremiah: What was the most successful method you used to promote your product that generated sales on Amazon (specifically through Amazon)?
Keep up the good work,
Cheers! -
This is a great story. I love how Jeremiah took his passion for learning how to surf and his hobby as a photographer and essentially created a new chapter in his life.
Congrats not only on your success but also on marrying a Brazilian bikini model!
I'm sure the guys on this list will LOVE all the photos :-). This is NOT one post I'll send my young teen boys to.
But it's a great story. Way to make his dream life happen in two years time. Very cool.
Tim / Jeremiah –
So I take it you can find Brazilian girls in Argentina… Will these Brazilian girls know English and/or Spanish?
I am getting fluent in Spanish, but not a lick in Portuguese.
Hey Ryan,
I've heard that since those two countries are so close together you will find both in either country. They are so close in fact that there is a new language emerging which is a cross between Portuguese and Spanish! I don't think they will know a lot of English-only the well-to-do seem to attend schools that teach English whereby one becomes fluent. In my experience, Good luck in your quest to learn Spanish! Just remember, Portuguese sounds nothing like Spanish.
some will, some wont, some will scratch a few words. Spanish is quite similar to Portuguese, except for a few words, and if you are coming to southern Brazil, they will try to understand you in Spanish. Otherwise, make friends with someone here (I'm in southern Brazil) the people is usually friendly and open, and will be glad to sit on a table, drink something and maybe "chase tails" with you.
Everyone. It's summer in Brazil. Come here and enjoy!
Yet another irresistible post title.
Recently subscribed with another address via email, btw (because "subscribers are smart and hot")–but received no notice of this post. (Yes I hit the link in the auto-email and saw the "confirmed" window, twice now.)
Might want to glitch-check your signup routine before launch day.
As for the wife–still shopping…
Hi John,
Wow, that's odd. I'll check on it. Thank you for the heads up!
To John's point:
Anyone else having trouble or errors with email subscriptions to this blog?
No problems. I always get em.
Can't wait for those B&N copies to ship!
I had a problem recently, too.
I have been a subscriber for a few years and noticed I wasn't using the email account I'd subscribed with any longer. So I re-subscribed with my primary account, but wasn't getting the email notices.
I actually got back on the site after seeing a number of tweets about Tim and saw I hadn't gotten any recent posts since re-subscribing.
Went through it a second time and it is finally working.
I've had trouble with a couple posts.
They didn't come up on Google Reader.
I think they were: Feces on the bloodstream and The New Book.
Got your last post alright.
Nice pics Really good post – it's always great to hear how somebody had the balls to follow their dreams. Once you get past the initial fear of actually trying something, you almost always come out ahead.
Did this comment work?
Yes, thank you for testing
The post title drew me in admittedly, but what an amazing story. It's very inspirational to read about someone who goes out and gets what they want!
Great post, but too late. I am already involved in a serious committed relationship. Not with a model, but with a doctor.
You write some great headlines Tim!
So, someone had to ask. Which 4 made it into Brazilian Playboy?
Just thought you should know, it's very easy to modify the WordPress Loop to exclude posts from a certain category on your homepage. This would probably be easier than changing the dates on posts which must surely knock everything out of sync?
If you need pointing in the right direction, feel free to drop me an email.
Thanks, Andy! Will drop you an email today.
OMG…. WOW. In <3
Looks like comments work on 4 hour blog…only it points to fourhourworkweek.com!
Brazilian retreats is where ya wanna go for the wife hunting! Ask the yoga instructor to point you to the locals;-))) I'm thinking of Kimberly Johnson who leads 'em over there…look her up, man.
This is my effort to win the public thanks. Let's hope it works.
Besides, I haven't read your post yet, but checked out each photo more than three times. I will give it one more round when I will read the post.
Wow, I really enjoyed this post!
Of course, as a happily married man, I only read the text portions and did not look at any of the photos
Com prazer,
Olly -
I noticed you adapted my advertising submission for your new books online marketing campaign, but I got no mention or thank you. Seems a bit ungrateful don't you think? I mean, I'm no expert in manners or anything, but when a man does you a service, in the very least one should direct him a thank you, no?
Hi JP,
I'm not sure which ad is yours, but we're just testing the finalists, exactly as planned in the post! This is to determine who the winner is. The reason you're only seeing a few ads pop up is that we're limiting ads displayed to single IP addresses.
Hope that helps!
Great post and fair play to Jeremiah for living his dream. I'm definitely adding "mais sexo" to my vocabulary of random foreign phrases for use on my girlfriend.
Hi Tim,
Not had an email about a post for many months, I just check every week if theres a new post as nothing ever hits my inbox. Your blog is awesome.
Wow, how eerie.
I'm happily married, and it's in part because of your book, Tim. A year ago, I was working in management in the pharmaceutical industry in America. Now, I live in Denmark with my new husband (learning how to be a PHOTOGRAPHER no less!).
I took a leap of faith because of your book, and couldn't be happier.
We met on a vacation with all of the time I had saved up from my old job, and I just fell in love with both him and the country. We spent a year and a half (From September 08 to February 10), living in two different countries, working long hours, a global economic crisis, increased fears, saving up money, overcoming bureaucratic obstacles, and going through not one, but two weddings so I could legally emigrate to Denmark. Using tips from 4HWW made the transition immensely easier, and living here I feel more relaxed and more confident with myself than I ever did in the states.
Even though I wouldn't move to Brazil I'd love the opportunity to talk shop on Photography with Jeremiah, as I'm currently building up my portfolio.
Congratulations, S Leigh! Your comment totally made my day
Denmark's amazing, in the summer especially. My great-grandparents were Danish, and I've spent some time over yonder.
Thanks again so much for posting,
S Leigh Schmidt,
I'm not sure if you will receive this comment but I thought I would give it a try. I am also a photographer and plan on eventually emigrating to Denmark. I am really interested in learning more about the culture and the photo biz over there. ie;, How difficult is it to find a commercial job or do free-lance work with a language barrier? How much opportunity is there over there? I'm somewhat nervous of taking a giant leap but still intend on making the plunge on being a fashion and travel photographer. I'm also interested in singing opera there as well. (I have several degrees in both photography and music). I would really just like to pick apart your brain if it's possible.
For everyone considering a trip to Florianópolis to chase girls: pack now and go!!!
I'm a Brazilian living in São Paulo who spent lots of time travelling this area. You won't believe somewhere like this actually exists.
Some tips:
- Avoid travelling in January (too crowded) and July (too cold)
- Look for accomodation near surf spots, even if you don't surf.
- Go for the local girls. They are the most beuatiful and friendly ones you'll ever meet.
- The best approach: look for beautiful girls leaving or arriving at the beach and, without hitting on them (for now!!!) just be friendly, say you don't know the area and is looking for good places to eat/have a drink/go out etc. One of two things will happen: you'll either find places where those girls go (which is already nice!) or, even better, they will say where they are going and ask you to go with them. It never fails (and if it does for some reason, there are tons of girls that will motivate you to keep trying!!!) -
Hi Tim!
when do you come to GERMANY-we need You here, cause we work our ass of and don´t get more reward for this…please teach us to do better with our time/money! I will set up some public speaking meetings for you!
Kind Regards
by the way, in euorpe the gilrs are also nice-
Hi Carmen,
I would LOVE to get back to Germany! Hope to see you there in 2011
Bis dann!
This post made me a little uncomfortable. The case study was actually very good – and I think that Jeremiah deserves accolades for making his dream come true – but what makes me more uncomfortable is the context building around it – like ooh, ogle Brazilian girls – and the dehumanizing language around that. Tim, lots and lots of women read your book and your blog as well – please keep that in mind. I would hate to think that this is really your perspective about women.
I'm glad someone else feels the way I do about this.
As a brazillian, I must say:
Really, the girls here don't even know how hot they look. They just think they are normal. And this is why they will be so friendly if you come to talk to them or ask them to make a photo shoot.
I think it's really interesting to post something like that. We brazillians need to start learning how to draw some attention to our qualities, instead of our defects. In general, brazillians are good, beautiful people, but terrible marketers when it comes to selling our image worldwide.
Congratulations for this post! Very nice to see you are living a dream and happily married to a brazillian hottie!
I am brazilian too.
I agree with a lot of what you said.
Just to let our friends from other countries know:
Not all brazilian girls are that hot.
Florianópolis is like a paradise when it comes to girls, but if you go to other parts of the country you might not find that many gorgeous gals.
Lisa, I was wondering if I was the only person thinking that. I was also uncomfortable with how much he got from these models. If this was design, people would be decrying the 'spec' work.
Well, yes – I do think it's unethical to photograph models like that (who are probably in a more delicate financial situation than the photographer) without paying them – but at least he corrected that pretty quickly, it seems like. I have nothing against modeling in general, and I know that many beautiful Brazilian women have done really well for themselves through modeling. However, it's also rife with exploitation.
I just wanted to follow up on some of the comments who said I may have taken advantage of these women.
I don't really blame anyone for feeling that way from just reading this story and gaining a small insight into this project. But I wanted the chance to explain myself and in particular on this point of not paying the girls who participated.
The girls made the photos because they could see I was a talented photographer with a genuine desire. They saw it as a great opportunity to build their portfolios. All the participants wanted to be photographed or obviously they would not have participated. At times I would shoot photos of them specifically just for them to use for building their portfolios. They used these photos to gain various opportunities and I am very happy to have been a part of that. Furthermore, it is not as if I was making money myself. The first few years of this project were big losses. Frankly I couldn't afford to pay the girls to participate. This was a project I started more for my desire to be a swimsuit photographer than to make another dollar. The girls loved the project and the photos. Many participated in multiple years. So I really don't think there were any victims here. Sorry if the photos of beautiful women offend anyone but let's face it, guys really like this sort of stuff
I'm happily married. Here's how we met.
Half way through college in the rural midwest, I decided to go live in central Mexico for a year and a half. I was renting a room from an older widowed woman with a 3-bedroom house. Eventually 2 women from a university in London doing a 6-month study abroad rented the other room. One was from a small town in Portugal. After initially really butting heads, she and I started hitting it off and 'dated' for the last few months she was there. She went back to London; I eventually went back to the States. Over the next 5 years, we stayed in touch and made some trips to see each other (and the world). Finally we said what the hell. She quit her job and moved to where I was in San Francisco for the 6 months her visa allowed. Then I proposed, she said yes, and we got married the same day on a bluff overlooking the Pacific Ocean with a few friends as witnesses. We've been married 7 years, and now have a 3 yr old son and 1 yr old daughter.
Could this be engineered? Maybe not — never thought I'd go to Mexico to meet my future Portuguese wife. I guess I'd just say that you have to do interesting things to meet interesting people.
Love your story! Gives hope to all of us who are still looking for that interesting someone. Makes me think I need to do something out of my comfort zone.
Tim & Jeremiah,
Great post. Not everyone will agree but then you can't please all of the people all of the time! A great example of following your dreams and making them a reality. -
Great story. Gives hope to all of us still looking for the interesting someone and makes me realise he may not be right on my doorstep!!
Tim & Jeremiah,
Great post. As is always true in life, one can't please all the people all of the time. What I took from this post is that dreams can come true if we are willing to do something to make them a reality. The vehicle of the story may rub some people up the wrong way but then they're missing the point. There will be always be people who will never go blind from looking on the bright side of life!! Again, thanks for another interesting post and good luck with the book.
ewww. not paying people for their work is so gross.
Hi Christine,
Please see Jeremiah's comment on this (in the comments), as well as Stefan's. It wasn't just that Jeremiah didn't pay them in the beginning — he couldn't! No budget.
Hope that helps somehow,
Most people looking to get into modeling have to pay a professional photographer hundreds of dollars to have head and body shots made.
He was doing it for free, for girls that were not already models. Only one was actually already a paid model, and she chose to do it anyway.
They all left with better quality shots than most modeling photographers would have provided them, and they didn't even have to pay a dime.
It's amassing how just a tweak in thinking can completely change the perspective on a situation.
Plus, later….when they were legitimate models (because of the shots he gave them….that launched most of their careers)…(and he had the money to do so)…he did start paying them.
(or at least that's how I read it:)
Hi Lisa, Hayden and Christine,
As a Brazilian and a women, I applaude Jeremiah work!
Only you three are not happy with this article. Uncomfortable??? Why????
This is a great story of success!
People work for free in any bussiness. Have you ever heard of internship?
Secondly, you don't understand brazilian culture! Being sexy and beautiful isn't looked down upon! Everyone uses tiny bikinis and we always love to look beautiful! In fact, we love beauty in every aspect…we will get mad if our soccer team wins without playing beautifully!
Good lucky on your bussiness Jeremiah!
Love your blog Tim!!!-
Muito obrigado, Vanessa
Um abraco,
Thank you Vanessa. I was shaking my head at some of the female comments until I came across your post. Not only are Brazilian woman more beautiful, but they dont fly off the handle the moment someone nears their oh-so-sensitive comfort zone. Thank you Vanessa for not only defending this great business success story, but demonstrating that there are reasonable women in the world.
I just want to say…why doesn't anyone see that the photographers time is worth something also. No to mention the cost of building a real good portfolio can be very very expensive. I'm a photgrapher and every model I run into nowadays expects to get free shots, just because they think there hot, and because there are so many photographers out there offering them for free. You can never exploit some who agrees to do anything from there own free will. No one held a gun to there heads and it look like they really enjoyed it, seeing these beautiful smiles! I think what offends people commenting on this the most is that they can't understand how 1. beautiful women can be so nice and 2. They haven't turned into what American women have completely gold digging or fame digging for everything. Guys the really warm naturally hot women live over seas end of story. There are hardly any women in the US that are natural anymore. They are all pumped full of silicone and eat very poor diets and it shows.
Great Post!
I'm happily married now, and here's my story:
Two things were happening in my life when I first started my Journey,
First, I was really bad at talking to women, and was without a girlfriend for a long time, and second, I was working at a job that sucked my time and forced me to be in front of a computer most of the day and not have time to go out and have a real social life.
I hit rock bottom when a girl I liked at work basically treated me like dirt and broke my heart and that's when I decided to change my life.
Since I was in front of the computer most of the day anyway, I started fooling around with online dating.
At first, I sucked at that as well, but I was willing to try and fail so I can learn and improve.
It was basically a chance for me to build up my confidence with women and get over my personal inhibitions and the online part allowed me to do it in a "safer" environment so rejections didn't hurt that much
After about 6 months of trial and error I figured out ways to overcome most of my inhibitions and then the fun began…
The most important thing I think I did was to actually write down what kind of girl I'm looking for and break down the qualities into something that was almost quantifiable (I'm a geek, what can i say…) in terms of looks, personality, and other qualities that were important to me (e.g. how close is she to her family etc….)
I actually had a spreadsheet with those qualities and I used it to understand how the girls I was meeting would measure up as long term partners.
When I got really good at online dating, I was going out with 10 girls a week, all really high quality in terms of what I was looking for. That sounds like fun, but it's really hard if you want to maintain a relationship with any of them…
I also had some fun experiences dating models (not Brazilian, but still…:), a TV celebrity, and a ton of really great women.
My wife was one of those really special girls who just made me fall in love with her and that's how we met.
I obviously told her this story already, and while she would have probably liked to have a "princess romance" story, she's still really happy to be with me and is aware that movie romances are usually only in movies and the geek rarely gets the girl if he just stays a geek.
p.s. in case you were wondering, my wife used to be a cheerleader, was in a national beauty contest and today had 2 doctorate degrees. I love her very much…
Thanks for the story, Sam! I love it. I actually have a good friend (an engineer), who found his wife using a spreadsheet the same way. To each his own. He is happily married with kids.
I'd love to see that spreadsheet! I'm a novice at excel lol
Great story to read, but I gotta say kind of a misleading title. There was nothing in here about "how to marry a Brazilian Model", it was how to photograph Brazilian Models. The main character just ended up marrying one and the topic of him marrying her was mentioned in only one paragraph.
Not that it is that big of a deal, but you have had some stuff one here about dating (how you automated your dating life), so I figured it was going to be more along those lines and was interested to read something about that.
There was also no indication that this guy was "Wife Hunting" when he was down in Brazil. He was just talking about how he was photographing, not his tactics in acquiring a girl.
Misleading title to get more page views, I think so!!! But hey, it worked.
How fabulously relevant (irony in case anyone in bozo mode fails to realise whilst ogling).
Dear god, get over yourselves.
There's a place for everything people…
Hmm I'm not a fan of this post.
Hi Tim, I've been subscribed to your blog for ages, and loved this post.
For your QOD:
I met my husband while working as a pole dancer. He never goes out to clubs, he'd been out just to celebrate something, I ran across the road to that club on a short break; We're both ridiculously enthusiastic dancers (backflips?) – And he saw past the fact that I spent my nights half naked – I was actually working there for 3 weeks to get rent and tuition money (I know that's such a typical line – but the pay is amazing, and I was dirt poor and trying to make ends meet after a bad break up)
Considering how conservative he is, I have no idea how he didn't run for the hills when I told him – I don't think many guys would be comfortable with such a thought.
I am however still the butt of all stripper jokes.
@roksy…..I recently watched "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell"….. not the most politically corect film, but made me laugh just the same.
My favorite part in the whole film is when the stripper and the pissed off at life guy start a relationship. It makes you look at the whole idea of a strippers life in a different context.
I'm married with 3 kids, and personally don't like strip clubs much, mostly because I have two daughters:)
The last time I went to a strip club (was told it was a 5 star restaurant w/ burlesque entertainment…..which was a bit of a stretch:), my friend and i spent more time talking to the girls and learning their history, and I can honestly say that some were simply messed up, but a few were simply funding their future dreams and looked forward to when they wouldn't have to do it anymore (but they did admit that the money was so good that it would be difficult to quit:)
I've definitely learned in life, not to make snap judgments of others, and it sounds like your husband knows this fact as well.
Great story!
I'm definitely one of those 20% who this post is really for. (Not that I haven't bought multiple copies of both your books, and read your entire blog) but I've always though that Brazilian women are the most beautiful in the world.
I had a long way to go when I found this blog and started restructuring my life and habits to get what I want / need out of life. Amazing case studies like these help keep me energized and working towards following these dreams. Although I don't plan on marrying a Brazilian model, the underlying theme is the same.
Thanks again Tim!
As a woman who reads your blog, I find this post incredibly irritating. Not only is it dehumanizing, but it chips away at the credibility of the rest of your "life hacks." Maybe you should write your next hack on how, by pursuing a career in banking, women can find a rich husband! Seriously though, the rest of your content is awesome – this is just shallow and degrading.
PS – "Where they professional models?" should be "were"
Hi LB,
Thanks for the comment and typo catch. Please see my response to Coco.
To your point, and a common response, I actually don't think a post on how to find a (financially) successful husband would be a bad post at all.
The problem isn't with seeking out a "successful" husband or beautiful wife — that's the way it's been for eons, and that's how it will continue to be — it's seeking out those qualities to the exclusion of other qualities, which Jeremiah did not do. Many women have told me, at least after the honesty that follows a few drinks, that they couldn't marry someone who wasn't successful at what he did. Finance is usually a component of this, and these are not shallow women.
Believe me, I might change the hardwiring in men and women if I could, but I don't expect I can.
Hope that all helps somehow,
This blog post does what you do best: throw light on some really interesting and offbeat paths. However, I have to call you out on a point you make here.
You mention "hardwiring" in your reply. That was a shocker given that
1) You are, at least partly by degree and especially so by interest, a neuroscientist. More on this later in the comment
2) You rightfully take pride in questing assumptions and identifying bad science
3) For the most part, the choices you make in your language are fairly precise. You mention that you are an applied linguist.Now to explain why the "hardwiring", thrown at us by nativists and semi-nativists like Pinker, is scientifically unsound might fill a whole book. This is a topic I am deeply interested in and have done a fairly extensive study. But I am summarize a few points which I believe you will readily acknowledge.
Decisions people make, like women choosing to mate with successful men, are fairly complex. They're based on neural ensembles (we could call them neural circuits for simplicity, but to be accurate…), in turn on synaptic connections. There's a big emotional component too, with connections to amygdala and other brain parts responsible for the emotions in animal brains.However, there's is absolutely no evidence, that I can track, or any scientist (I have looked at many) can quote regarding synaptic connections being pre-determined at birth-the equivalent of 'hard-wiring', behavior genetics and much of evolutionary psychology in popular terminology.
Now, to the other side, neuroplasticity. Lots of recent research in neuroplasticity, and there're plenty of books on the topic, have shown just how plastic the brain is and what might help or hinder the process. Under the right conditions, drastic and mind-blowing neuroplastic changes (both neural ensembles and neurotransmitter levels) are possible even in adults. Now there's an equally powerful force, which goes by the name 'plasticity paradox', that makes you want to follow the path you have already taken. This is similar to tracks on a snow slope and the mechanism behind the 80/20 rule (which we both love :)). The tracks, in the brain's case neural ensembles, that have been used in the past, tend to be preferred to building new neural ensembles. This gives people the illusion that something is fixed when in reality it's not. We just need to dig deeper.
This is already turning out to be a huge comment, but one last quick point on statistical studies, including twin and adoption studies. Both you and I love Taleb and he points out repeatedly how statisticians can be blinded. There's plenty of material, which can be found by a book search on Amazon or a google search, which points out methodological flaws in the twin and adoption studies. A few include selection bias, omitted variables, reification,… I will spare your readers a few yawns if I can.
We do not know everything about the brain, but people tend to be lazy, oversimplify and in the process ignore the new findings that could possibly give millions of people a kick in the butt. The extra motivation you get from knowing that your effort makes a monumental difference to who you become is immense. Carol Dweck, of the growth mindset, has some great research on this. My personal experiences bow to the power of the growth mindset.
Now why did I take the time to type this out? Tim, you have been a huge inspiration to me. From giving courage to quit a bad job in 8 days (without another one in hand in a downturn economy) to rapid skill acquisition (I am going to contact you on this one, there's some cool stuff brewing) to putting on 15 lbs of muscle in 10 workouts (I know it's kind of small, but I don't have muscle memory and was getting used to the new workout style). And there's a lot more exciting stuff a few months down the pike.
Please feel free to not publish the comment if you think it's way too long, but I really hope you had the chance to read it.
Wow… thanks, Gaju! That's one hell of a thoughtful comment. Needless to say, probably makes more sense to grab coffee to talk over this stuff, but I agree with almost all of it, if not all of it. I think I just need to define "hardwiring" a bit more clearly
Happy holidays,
Hardwiring? really? Could you have meant "culturally reinforced"? However, Tim, these social values are probably derived from culture and nature, an overlapping of multiple complex structures. To suggest that this is simply about "biology" is disingenuous. You really believe that individuals are puppets, controlled by some invisible, genetic string? What about individual values, culture and choices…All strings? You know to dig deeper than that, come on Tim, you're a life examiner.
{head-shaking with confusion}
I don't think that you are chauvinistic or malicious, it just doesn't feel like your message to me. In all due respect, it feels a little like a guy trying to convince other guys that he's in the club. I've never seen this point of view. There's no real Hero in this story. Even though he got married, it still left a residue that's hard to remove. I finished the story feeling wounded, not refreshed. I understand I don't know you personally but I thought I understood your message. Do you understand why I would feel this way?
I think everyone has said almost everything that could possibly be said about this post on all sides. I'm sure there were posts that were so offensive to your sensibilities that you could not even post them. I hope this isn't one of them : )
You're still an awesomely talented guy.
Please reflect.
Tim and Gaju -
This may not be the best news for Gaju, but Tim is right. Don't ditch the word 'hard-wiring' so quickly.
We all have a reptilian brain – we all have animal tendencies that's part of our genetics (but these tendencies and like a whole world of DIFFERENCE for men and women) that are in us from 2 million years ago.
Hard-wiring is simply a simple word to use to describe it.
To prove my point – go and ask ANY man when was the last time he feared for his safety. And then go and ask ANY woman who feared for her safety (or life) I bet you Tim Ferriss's buns that you will get entirely different answers.
As someone who write about and sells programs on relationships, the differences between men and women, and masculinity/femininity, I can say that Men and women ARE completely different. The layers of brain and our spirit-centred selves was built on TOP of the reptilian brain, so our animal brain is still there, and that is the kind of thing I believe Tim is referring to. The animal tendencies are, however, different for men and women.
And to Seila C – the "culturally reinforced' notion you mention is actually more fitting for the way you are approaching the situation. THAT is culturally reinforced. There's this myth that men and women are the same, somehow, and the gender lines are unfortunately more and more blurred in today's western world.
As Tim said somewhere else in this comments thread – The equality situation causes just as much problems as it fixes.
I hope that all came out in a logical way, I don't feel like it did but I think I made all the points I wanted to make, anyway.
[Tim note: this is from a female reader]
What nice big boobs and butts! Good for him he married a pair, eh?
I'm going with what Lisa said but with more force, discomfort and less uncertainty about the prevailing attitude towards women. Straight doods aren't, or weren't, your only audience Tim.
Hi Coco,
Thanks for the comment. I realize this. Please see some of the comments from women who took this article differently, though. Also, Jeremiah and I never said that beauty was the end-all. He found an incredible woman with the other characteristics he was looking for. That gives a lot of hope to those — male and female — who have all but given up hope in the dating game.
Hope you can see that side of the story as well.
Don't worry about him. I've come to realize that people like this think they can justify ANYTHING they say or do, effectively (to them) blocking out the other side of the conversation. Has Tim ever admitted a true mistake, one which he didn't play off as a "learning experience" or some other such bull? No, because people with his background don't need or have to come face to face with the problems they create. This may be the true meaning of a "life hack".
I'm sure the millions of donated books make up for the unerring female objectification I see in this and any other article of yours involving women who aren't your business colleagues. Outsourcing dating was one of my favorite "women as commodities" pieces. How courageous of you, to restate what men have been saying about women for thousands of years. "A man can and will do anything to get women, just like a dog": This is what men are saying (oh, I'm sure you don't mean it that way…) with their smirking justifications.
And good job on the stripper who met her husband at a club. I'm sure his jabs at you are just his way of showing you respect after all these years, right? THESE are your future female fans, Tim. Only broken women would put up with this trash.
In short, I'm glad Jeremiah got to follow his exotic dream to a destination known for prostitution, where it would be easier to let his dick lead him to success. More power to you, I'm happy you paid them eventually and allowed them to avoid the flesh trade. Sort of. Shows some humanity. Tim, on the other hand, is apparently only a numbers man in respect to "his" women, as shown by his disgusting add-on letting any pissed off readers know before they post that to him, they don't count a lick. Like all similarly base "men", good to know you've still got your NPD blinders on.
Sorry you feel that way, Izziezenna. I have plenty of female friends — including very well-educated, platonic friends — and not one has accused me of being a misogynist or anything like it. I wouldn't consider them "broken women" in the least. Some of them are the absolute best in the world at what they do.
I don't surround myself with weak women. That's for even weaker men. But… do I like to look at attractive women? Absolutely. That's part of being a male.
This comment is absurd. You assume these women had no other options other than prostitution? You assume the photographer took advantage of them by giving them headshots to use for the future which, here in the U.S., can cost >$1000 a piece? Of course I would not really expect you to know that.
I take offense to this as one of my best friends in the world came to the U.S. on the back of a modeling career where she was discovered on the streets in a 2nd world country. She was not paid for the first shoot. However, the photographer mentored her, submitted her photos, and provided her with the jump board to immigrate to the U.S. and pursue her dreams.
Oh and by the way, she is currently attending an Ivy League institution and will be heading to law school to work in the entertainment law in the future.
This view in the United States that it is somehow "de-humanizing" to celebrate the HUMAN body is just downright stupid. But, I guess this is what happens when the nation suffers an obesity rate in excess of 30%.
Tim> I loved this article.
Jeremiah> Good for you to pursue your dreams and finding an excellent wife. -
I can appreciate your opinion about the content of this article, but, I'm not sure why you added: "people with his background don't need or have to come face to face with the problems they create."
The statement seems unfounded to me. Anyone who's started their own business from nothing and who's written a book has, without question, had to face self-created problems and engage in MANY uncomfortable conversations that are the direct result of their own actions.
Sure, much of 4HWW is about redirection of time-consuming, irrelevant interruption… but that, I think, is completely different from avoiding conflicts–which is what you seem to suggest Tim does (Am I misreading?).
Also, you start your post by saying "people like this think they can justify ANYTHING they say or do, effectively (to them) blocking out the other side of the conversation."
If that were true, then why would he have posted your comment?
Just my thoughts. Thanks.
@Former Reader – what's most offensive to me as a Brazilian is to read comments such as yours, i.e. from someone who has obviously never been to Brazil or maybe even read anything remotely serious about it. Yes, there's prostitution here, but also in Amsterdam, New York, Berlin etc. Never heard of Florianópolis being a "destination known for prostitution" though. Ever. You probably read something about child prostitution in Natal or something, which is about the same distance from Florianópolis as Charleston is from Las Vegas, just to give you an idea, not to speak of the economic difference. Sex tourism, however, is done mainly by Europeans from Italy, Spain, France, for example. You would do us all a favor if you actually travelled a little bit and/or informed yourself a little better before posting things like that. And, as Jeremiah and Tim have correctly said, give Brazilian women some credit. Not as many girls as you apparently think would do anything for money or to marry a foreigner. It's hard to generalize, but I can say that many of my friends, for instance, don't care at all for foreigners. Brazilian guys have also their own charm, I can say that from experience…As if these girls would ever go into the "flesh trade"…give me a break! Ever heard of Gisele Bündchen? For someone with such strong opinions about the topic, I'm shocked at your absolute lack of information and your easy labels, such as "exotic" and "destination known for prostitution". Then again, maybe that's exactly why your opinions are so strong….
Sorry for the long comment, Tim, but it just rubbed me the wrong way. Keep up the great posts!
You have got to be kidding me! Are you trying to weed out all intelligent women from your fan base? I find this offensive and insensitive. I've recommended you to friends and colleagues for a long time. That ends with your backing of this disrespectful ridiculous article.
I have to agree with Ellen and Lisa on this one Tim.
Offensive, sexist and objectifying women.
There is so much more to a woman that what her body and face look like.
Its degrading. I thought you had more class.
Apparently he is in effect only weeding out the unintelligent. Men are inherently seek out certain characteristics in a woman. One of these things happens to be appearance. What this post is demonstrating is that Jeremiah has killed two birds with one stone; first, by developing a successful business; secondly, by meeting his wife. Nowhere in this post does it say he married her entirely for her looks. People are going to get involved only with people they are attracted to. That is how things start. Over time, if they have the other more important things one is looking for: personality, intelligence, values, whatever else you are looking for, than the relationship moves forward.
The fact is that none of that becomes possible without attraction. Oprah and friends can perpetuate these notions of "objectifying woman" and clearly its working with you. However, these concepts fly in the face of human nature and rest only on the unstable pillars of political correctness.
Take a step back and look at this objectively before you judge; otherwise, Tim is certainly not losing an intelligent reader.
This is by far the very best thing you've ever posted in all of Ferrissian history. The upside-down fire was cool, too though
I'm diggin it.
Fantastic post as usual.
I met my wife Jena, my dream woman, when I was teaching a salsa class at Burning Man, 2007. She strolled up to me and we had several amazing dances together.
I had been studying salsa for about 11 years, and teaching as a serious hobby for about 6, so I had definitely paid my dues by that point to be in a position at the front of the crowd teaching at a huge party.
I don't think I would have had a fraction of the chance of meeting her had I been some random guy at a random party. There's a reason she walked up to *me* to dance with me–I was in front of the crowd teaching.
The takeaway, for both single men and women, is that it pays to *organize* events where you come into contact with lots of singles. If you have to pay your dues for many years to get good enough at something to be leading/teaching the room, fine. But you can even start organizing creative social or networking events now, without years of "paying dues." When you're at the head of the crowd, or leading it, you meet a lot more people than anyone else at the party–and you are more attractive to others in the room, as you're up there, leading confidently. Worked for me!
Digging this advice. Been playing flute for almost a decade now. After the concert, everyone wants to talk to the soloist
Hey tim and jeremiah,
If you'd like people for the contest, I would literally fly to brazil to meet jeremiah and get his advice on being a swimsuit photographer, I've wanted to be a swimsuit photographer since I was 13, I've got my own equipment, have done some fashion photography in the states, and actually thought of a way to raise money for educational charities with swimsuit photos about two weeks ago.I'm 23 years old and have been living on a 4hww type muse for a two and a half years now and was already intending to go someplace warm this winter, this sounds way better than anything I could have planned on my own. It would be awesome to be a part of this, and can absolutely send you guys some portfolio pictures if you think I've got a shot.
Sean -
Hi Tim,
thanks for sharing this inspiring story!
I think I'll get one of these calendars! -
Re: Question of the Day (QOD): If you're happily married, how did you meet your husband or wife, and do you think someone could engineer the same? Share in the comments!
1st, brave article, brave question thank you!
2nd, Along parallel lines of thinking "when everyone is your customer, no one is your customer" is exactly how I met my wife. I was divorced 11 years ago after 22 years and 4 children. Prior to that I was a marriage & family counselor(another story). Anyway I took my own advice and went through a small divorce recovery program. In that program we were given a book that gave 3 pieces of advice.
1) Only look for a perspective mate within the natural course of your life's journey. (ie) Work, recreation, hobby's, etc,
2) Make a list of the 10 things that you want in a mate. We were instructed to be painfully honest with ourselves so that we could finally be honest with others. Most in our group felt this was to harsh, impossible, etc. Our recovery mentor explained, yes it can seem tough and that very few people have the courage to do it (1 in 5-7) and he was right, 3 of 15 of us did it.
3) Stop looking and trust in your list. That is what I did, whole heartedly.
About 3 months later I met my current wife. I truly wasn't looking! We've been together 8 years, married 21/2 and it has been incredible! To be open and honest, the only thing that didn't match on my list was hair colorTo this day, when my friends ask me what's your secret? I share these same three principals over and over. They work! In fact it's easy to tell who made and followed their list, and who didn't. Tim, thanks for the invitation to share. I think your work is brave and incredibly useful.
Michael Clement, Host "Living Right for Your Type Radio" on BTR-
Thank you so much for this comment! For point #2, the list, can you give me an example (not necessarily yours, if that's too personal) of what a list might look like as prescribed? Why were so many people uncomfortable doing it?
I too made a list after my first marriage failed after being encouraged to do so by my counselor. She asked me "What qualities have you always wanted in a wife? What have you pictured in your mind?"
My list;
1. Down to earth..not materialistic.
2. Enjoys having friends over and even stopping by unannounced.
3. Pretty in a "plain, no make-up sort of way", girl next door.
4. Someone with the same values and goals in life. VERY IMPORTANT.
5. Enjoys sex frequently (these are listed in no particular order or this would have been number 1!)
6. Reasonably athletic.
7. Honest
8. Has the same interests…travel etc.As I was dating women my counselor would have me pull out the list and compare it to them. If they didn't compare to the list it helped me keep the relationships on a more casual basis.
I was in the Denver airport with my 9 year old daughter and this woman caught my eye. She then ends up sitting behind us with her 7 year old son. We exchanged a few words and when we got to Houston I thought "I will never see this woman again unless I introduce myself".. so I did, then called her 2 days later. We ended up having friends in common and probably crossed paths closely without ever meeting. We dated several years then got married. We have been happily married for 13 years. Have had very few conflicts, have more fun every year in every way. The kids clicked and wanted us to get married before we did!
One more bit of advice….after my first divorce many of both our friends said that they would not have picked the first wife and I for each other. Therefore I gave close friends, family and even my counselor "veto power" on the next wife I chose because they know me the best and I did not want to go through that kind of pain again but more importantly cause that kind of pain to a child. They all voted YES on Kelley and most mentioned that it must be slim pickings out there for good men since she said yes to you! …..I hope they were kidding!
Good luck and take care,
Sure Tim, thank you for the opportunity to respond.
The list usually starts out quite raw and then takes on some refinements within a relatively short period time like a week or so.
Here are some primers – the key is honesty with ones self: (some are from my own list)
1) Hair Color and eye color, even skin tone.
2) Body Type – be honest about what will grab your attention day in & day out.
3) Height (ie) I'm 5″.7″ tall. I want a women 5′ to 5'3″
4) Financial status – Dependant, Independent, Interdependent
5) Children no children (age)
6) Shared interests (ie) In my case Snowboarding, Harley riding, travel
7) Physical Condition
8) Intelligent? Ambitious? Simple?
9) Personality type – Doer, Talker, Pacer, Thinker? Fast paced & out-spoken or cautious & reflective? Questioning & skeptical or Accepting and warm?
10) High, medium or low appetite for sex?Any one reading this, should keep in mind that this is in know way, shape or form, about finding the the perfect specimen of a human being. This is about being honest with ourselves about what we truly want in mate.
The way it typically works is we settle for someone (a typically fear based decision) and over the course of a couple of years we try to change them to fit our list. Oh yes, everyone has a list whether they realize or not. When we are finally honest with ourselves, ie; (this person isn't what I really wanted and trying change them to fit my list isn't working – damage already done) we say "you know, this isn't working for me." And then we repeat the same process with someone else hoping for different results.
Most people are uncomfortable about making the list, and they say it's because it feels harsh. I think it's much more harsh to try and change a person to fit our list. I never shared my list with anyone, that would also be harsh. I just made it, stuck in a file, and every time I met someone that I felt attracted to, I went home, took it out, and compared them to my list and shared with them appropriately.
The list for those who want to avoid hurting others and being hurt. In this way you demonstrate care, equally for yourself and the other human being.
Again, thank you! Michael Clement
Thanks, Michael! This is exactly what I was hoping you'd share.
Hey Tim, I've been following this blog all the way through, amazing! I'm starting a new series on my Inet radio show today: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/livingrightforyourtype
The Topic? Well, you could of guessed it!Relationship Problems? Let's DiSCover the issues! Part 1:
Understanding you. Does your relationship feel more like a parent/child relationship than a spouse to spouse, husband to wife, boyfriend to girlfriend? Could it be characterized by a system of rewards and criticisms? Most people confuse symptoms with issues, then put band aids on the problem. Join me on this 5 part journey, as I combine my DiSC training and experience with my marriage and family counseling training and experience. With your help it could get exciting! 877 257-6526 or click on chat now.If you feel it "appropriate" please pass along. Thanks!
Inspiring post indeed. Heading to South America in 2 weeks for my first mini-retirement thanks to you Tim.
How did you find Chris as a potential candidate to be your assistant? I'm interested to know how one can apply/interview/beg to become one of your PAs.
Just figured I'd add this, but I met a really awesome brazilian girl on a pub crawl in amsterdam this summer, and the two days I ran around with her were pretty much the highlight of that whole trip. They are absolutely amazing people, totally chilled out and fun to be around.
Becoming a swimsuit photographer and running around with brazilian girls all the time was pretty much the dreamline goal I didn't think would be able to pull off, so I didn't write it down. If you're having a contest, I would absolutely love to be a part of it.
Hahaha, great post. Good word to photo content too. ^_^
Thanks Tim, you open up a lot for people to live out their dreams.I came back from a mini-retirement in China where I met my girlfriend. It wasn't anything I was chasing after and fell out organically which is great. I guess I say it as a cautionary tale, since it is not so much about hunting a partner, but more taking a step back and finding out what really works for you, after that, everything else, including a partner, should fall in place.
~~hope that makes sense.*
Awesome post. Another female perspective — There's nothing unethical about giving beautiful girls an opportunity to showcase their beauty, and open up doors of opportunity that may have otherwise gone unopened. Perhaps its the girl's beauty that is making some of the females uncomfortable? For me, it's inspiration to Brazilian my arse up :-). Will the 4 hour Body will have some tips on how to do that? I'll be happy to be a case study. The before/after shots surely would help sell the book, from flat to fantastic :-).
Hi Amyah,
Thanks for the comment. To address your question about working on your posterior, yes, that is addressed in the book
Also, to those who are offended, I thought I'd reiterate a comment from Jeremiah:
"I just wanted to follow up on some of the comments who said I may have taken advantage of these women.
I don't really blame anyone for feeling that way from just reading this story and gaining a small insight into this project. But I wanted the chance to explain myself and in particular on this point of not paying the girls who participated.
The girls made the photos because they could see I was a talented photographer with a genuine desire. They saw it as a great opportunity to build their portfolios. All the participants wanted to be photographed or obviously they would not have participated. At times I would shoot photos of them specifically just for them to use for building their portfolios. They used these photos to gain various opportunities and I am very happy to have been a part of that. Furthermore, it is not as if I was making money myself. The first few years of this project were big losses. Frankly I couldn't afford to pay the girls to participate. This was a project I started more for my desire to be a swimsuit photographer than to make another dollar. The girls loved the project and the photos. Many participated in multiple years. So I really don't think there were any victims here."
What Jeremiah says in his response is very fair – and I understand where he's coming from. It is certainly true that he is providing a service by photographing them and allowing them to use the photos for their modeling portfolios. That is not, however, the context presented in the original post. It's more about – as I said before – objectifying women and talking about the process in a way that was somewhat dehumanizing. There was also no mention of the fact that many aspiring models in developing countries are taken advantage of – surely this must have been a consideration.
Anyway – I'm not insulted by the pictures of beautiful women and I am not surprised by the fact that guys like to look at pictures of said women. This isn't my issue at all. Also – I should also add – many women also like to look at pictures of beautiful women!
The point of my original reply was that the tone and the context building is misogynistic. I simply asked you, Tim to remember that a lot of women read your blog – and to consider that. Anyhoo. Happy day-after-Thanksgiving!
This guy is a total creepshow:
"The atmosphere is definitely one of the best things. It starts when the girls come to my house. I need to see them in their bikinis before we head out so I can prepare for the shoot"
"Sometimes, if I enjoyed the shoot, I would invite the girl back to my house so we could look at the photos together on my computer."
I think the intro is a little misleading — "from Montana," "no training." He was born in Montana but had been "all over the place" as a military kid. He had been en entrepreneur his whole life. He was a serious amateur photographer. So world traveler, savvy businessman/risk taker, and skilled photographer. Oh, and he spoke some Portuguese already. What other training would someone need for this kind of project?
I think the unfortunate issue with this kind of intro is it makes it sound like anyone can do anything without any preparation. This guy had been preparing his whole life. It just took figuring out where to focus that experience to get him to Brazil. (Oh — and a really useful contact on site in Brazil.)
I've had some pretty amazing adventures in my life, too, but it takes work. I've always liked your blog because it is not about the unready getting lucky; it's about being ready for anything and then learning how to focus that for specific things. It encourages the "ever-ready" lifestyle. It should not hint that, with no work and no preparation, a person can walk into any situation he or she can imagine.
I like your point, and tend to agree. Success isn't over night and all about luck… it's the consequence of continue actions and preparations towards your major life goals. You can speed it up or slow it down depending on how many hours your are willing to put into it every day!
I kind of love how totally un-PC this post is,…that you did it on Thanksgiving when everyone was posting all about gratitude,…and that you are so bravely staying outside of the box and true to the evolving Tim in your blog. Also quite entertaining to follow the comments crashing and the sheer number of men who now think you are an utter-genius The women might be a little stunned,….but I am sure that could be easily rectified by a male calendar interview or two. Love watching this interesting bridge between your four hour work week niche to the new one,…..and your words about not trying to please everyone. Happy Thanksgiving everybody! Here is to all of us living our dreams whatever they might be (P.S. his next business could be,…"so you got a four hour body and now you want to come to Brazil and get photographed like a hot Brazilian model (man or woman) in order to spice things up with your lover",…..maybe this could be the next eco-tourism niche :-)).
God I hate this guy (in the nicest way possible though ha ha ha)
One thing this post has made me do is hurry the heck up with my business so I can automate my money and head straight to Brazil
Although Jeremiah's resourcefulness on the lifestyle side is admirable, the economics of being a North American male working in South America (or Eastern Europe, or Southeast Asia, or much of Sub-Saharan Africa…) make marrying a beautiful foreign woman like shooting fish in a barrel.
This kind of post demeans us all.
Having spent a lot of time in South America and other developing countries, I would say that marrying a beautiful foreign woman with other wife-worthy qualities is not as easy as you make it sound.
Why Tim WHY? Your blog (and books) are supposed to inspire my dreams not shoot them down.
I'm joking of course. But your right. Women from other countries can see right trough us just as well as women from our own countries ha ha ha.
P.S. Tim I cannot WAIT for your 4 hour body book. I'm paying almost £30 for the book and quick overseas delivery for it so I get it before Christmas. Cannot wait. Its the only thing I've ever bought where the delivery is more expensive than the book so that says something about how much I think of you and your work. (I also cant stop talking about virbrams to the point of angering people ha ha)
As a Colombian girl who is considered to be very attractive and has many "wife-worthy qualities," I'm w/ you on this one Tim. For smart, caring people, it's not easy to find a great partner under ANY circumstance, really, no matter where they are from.
I'm personally highly allergic to foreigners who think that coming from a first world country alone puts them in front of the line. It's a very ignorant mindset.
Thank you, Andrea. The first-world bias you described bugs the sh*t out of me, too. The idea that I can waltz wherever I want and have foreign girls have sex with me (or marry me, or whatever) for a green card is so insulting as to be unbelievable. Most who stereotype that way need to travel more.
Thanks for the comment!
Tim, have you ever been to Japan?
So many beautiful Japanese girls dating foreign guys. And when you see the foreign guys, the first response is always "Why is she dating HIM??"
I have friends who have stayed in Tokyo for years, because they had no luck with women back home, but in Japan, they can have their pick.
They even have a name for it: Charisma Man (named after a very funny comic strip that describes the phenomenon: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charisma_Man).
Absurd. You wish to debunk the myth that women should be valued for something more than her looks, and then you go about promoting an ignorant view of non-Western women?
I assure you, if every American man could find a model by going abroad, American females would have a tough time finding mates.
Absurd. You wish to debunk that women should be valued for something more than her looks, and then you go about promoting an ignorant view of non-Western women?
I assure you, if every American man could find a model by going abroad, American females would have a tough time finding mates.
Great post, funny cause yesterday I was talking with a friend about picking up girls in Brazil and he told me that it was hard because you find a lot of shemales in the streets
Now now ladies, don't get intimidated by the pictures.
Yowza Yowzaaaa!! Pass da Tequila Sauza!!!********
Oi Tim! Obrigado pelo post das garotas gostosas Brasileiras! E parabens Jeremiah pelo casamento. Quero me-casar com uma tambem!
This post should be marked "Not Safe For Work"…because it will make you want to leave your current work and go do something like this!!! Unless of course you already do this type of thing!
Hey Tim,
Wanted to give you a heads-up on a typo, one of the questions above reads:
"Where they professional models?"
On a humorous note, when I read that, I read it in a Lil' Jon-esque rapper voice. Very funny.
- Pat
This was fun story. It got me thinking: Jobs where you can meet attactive women.
Swimsuit model photog.
That is a no brainer.
I always thought yoga instructor would be good too.
Anyone else?
I LOVE this post. I recently had a very similar idea. I'm an engineer and as a result see virtually no girls at work and I'm working many 16 hours days. It's rather depressing, however, I'm well on my way to becoming one of the NR. Just working as an engineer to secure capital necessary for one of my several JV's.
To make a long story short. I've thought about putting together modeling portfolios for girls interested in starting modeling. I'd do it for free and in return hopefully promote my hobby business taking photos! I was going to use craigslist in my hometown which is home of University of Arizona and see where I can get.
It's really refreshing to see that this can actually work! Thanks for post!!!
Hi Tim!!! Very interesting post!! I am living in Florianópolis for about 7 years, and have my point of view how did he got so easily the models to photograph.
Here (all over BraSil) girl LOVE, realy LOVE to show up!! To be a model here is one of the coolest thing for a girl!! So she accept any chance to appear!! In a website, a calendar, outdoor, etc. even for free.
And you friend have one more thing to play with: he is North America. People around here have a lot of consideration about American ( and I can say European) people. They thing everybody from other country has money I do great things (but of course some do and some don't).
Your friend is a great photographer I chose the perfect place to do that. Here is really a paradise, you know that!
And what is better than photograph these girls!!!???
Um abraço!
Stéfan Adam
Um abraco! Muito obrigado for the comment, Stefan!
Looks like a great article but how am I supposed to read it at work? Got about 15% done then the women started showing up on screen… have to wait for another opportunity to read it… just thought I'd share the first humorous situation in my day today.
pete -
Love It.
My Wife just turned me on to your blog. Awesome. Also I work in Iraq and have seen theses Calendars they are really good. I met my wife during a fire at work. While I am sure that the same type of meeting could be engineered I would not recommend it. I will say this if you are prepared for most things in advance you can make them look easy.
Hi Jeremiah,
Great story. I met my wife in Brazil 12 years ago pursing a similar venture only supplying high fashion Brazilian bikinis on a global basis. Question. Does Dayana get jealous when you go on bikini photo sessions?
Tim, looking forward to reading your next book.
Congrats! Good question for Jeremiah.
She's not jealous at all. In fact she is a big help with every part of the part of the project.
I think the toughest thing for some people to understand is the difference in culture between Brazil and a country like the USA. Another of Tim's readers, Stéfan Adam, pointed this out in his own comments.
Brazilians are happy open people but also very conservative at the same time. Sure they wear the skimpiest bikinis in the world but they still don't go nude and they have very high morals. These women are not easy! They are extremely classy. They are beautiful and they don't mind flaunting that to a point.
I've seen rich Americans, Europeans, Australians, and more strike out hundreds and hundreds of times in Brazil simply because they tried flaunting their money. Sure a few girls might go for this but the vast majority despise this kind of stuff. In that regard its just like any culture.
For anyone labeling these women as victims, I don't think they are giving these ladies enough credit.
Agreed 100%. If you've never lived in Brazil, aren't Brazilian, or don't know dozens of Brazilians, please don't make make sweeping judgments about the girls in this post. Just silly.
I am extremely envious of Jeremiah Thompson and Thales. And Not just because of their profession or attractive companions.(only partially :P) They are in a beautiful place with wonderful people, pursuing their own business ventures their way. Isn't that what lifestyle design is all about? To do things your way, at a place of your choosing, experiencing the life that you want with people you love. That is the dream.
*your dream may differ*I congratulate Jeremiah Thompson,Thales, Stéfan Adam and the other people who are living in this beautiful place, living their dream. Well done!
Send me a post card, would you ?
Any time a post can combine beautiful (Brazilian) women with a lesson on blogging is a win in my books!
Apart from the inspiring story of the photographer, I really like the lesson at the end, as well. I often try to be diverse in my subject matter, too, but maybe I'm too diverse and lack a core/focus at the heart of it all. Hopefully, I'll discover that before it's too late.
Awesome story. Just shows how you can just go out and do anything.
Great article Tim. I've learned a lot from your posts because we do a lot of the same things, but I've noticed that you are much more effective than me. You're helping me improve my results.
Regarding the people who think he took advantage of the amateur models by not paying them initially, they might not realize that it is actually the standard practice. There is a huge investment of time and money by the photographer before, during, and after the shoot.
If the models want the photos exclusively for their own personal use, than they pay the photographer and pay for all their own clothes, makeup, etc.
If the photographer has rights to the photographs, than amateur models are usually are not paid, but get digital copies with limited rights to use and sometimes a few nice prints for free. Some of the models are trying to get into the industry and want the experience and the photographs for their portfolios. Others simply want to get nice photographs of themselves without having to pay for the photographer.
When it works, it is a good trade for both parties. But sometimes the photographer ends up with images he cannot use because for various reasons including the inability to get the amateur models to pose properly. And sometimes the model doesn't receive good (or any) images due to an unprofessional photographer.
If he paid $250 to the amateur models, as well as provided digital images with limited rights to use, he actually was quite generous.
Just a guess here, but I'm wagering the several female readers who took offense at this post, are middle class American women.
I hate to break it to you ladies, but there are different views and attitudes towards such things in other places.
My girlfriend is from Puerto Rico, and we have a great relationship.
A friend of mine back in college tried to tell me, "start dating Latinas, and you will never go back." I truly wish I had taken his advice much sooner. It looks like Jeremiah found the same thing. More power to him!Tim, keep the awesomeness coming!
Just a response to some people saying the models were taken advantage of and obviously Jeremiah cleared this up, but what every happened to two people engaging in a mutual beneficial agreement? Not to be harsh, but did Jeremiah put a gun to these girls heads and say "pose for me or die!!!!"? Obviously these girls saw value in it. I know if I was a beautiful brazilian girl and some random American guy asked me if he could shoot photos of me in a bikini, I would put up a strong defense. If I didn't see value out of it, I wouldn't do it.
And to use an analogy, think of it as an internship. Working as an internship that pays nothing can sometimes be 10 tens more valuable in the long run than a normal paying job in terms of connections you make, knowledge you learn, etc. These things are "wealth" that have far greater value that simple monetary dollar wealth you earn and then spend. So in essence, these girls were quite smart and probably knew what they were doing. Lets stop thinking of everyone as victims!!!
Email notification for this post showed up at 7:42 (Pacific Time) this morning; will keep tabs on next one, maybe it's fixed. There is however one remaining (and extremely serious) problem with this emailed post:
No pictures.
Many Brazillian models are actually transvestites. And they'll marry any American to get US citizenship.
This is my dream and it is fantastic to read of someone making it a reality for themselves. Another informative and inspirational post, thanks!
Hey Tim – so my 2 cents
I think its great that Jeremiah followed a passion and succeeded, as well as found love in the process – that's FANTASTIC for him.As an actress – living in Hollywood – the rest unfortunately is done here every day and the outcome is not always happy for the girls that fall prey to unethical people by jumping into the same type of situation – as I'm sure many Brazilian girls do as well.
We all like to see what we perceive as beautiful – I just believe this did nothing but add to an ever growing warp in how we see/value each other when we are looking to form relationships – in Love or business.
(I'm also speaking as single person in a very looks oriented town/industry)Also, I believe that when we choose to offer a service to others ie: act, blog, photograph, engage in business etc. we have an opportunity in this service to show others a wider perspective than is the current norm and the majority of the article sort of missed the mark for me.
(Again just my 2 cents – not looking to convert the world – and I do appreciate your work Tim)Thanks for the opportunity to chime in
I think you are in the shallowest of all industries and for you to be commenting is hilarious. You sell your soul to do what you do in Hollywood. I lived there and I am very street smart and I saw the types of stuff going on daily. To be in that industry you have to have a total disrespect for yourself, hence the extraordinary amount of people on medication or self medicate in Hollywood.
Test comment… follow up w facebook post.
My long-time girfriend is Brazilian, and I consider myself to be the luckiest person alive—not because of where she comes from, mind you, but because of everything she is. Beautiful, funny, smart—but also serious, hard-working, and committed.
The mysogynism inherent in swimsuit photography (and reflected somewhat in the tone of the article) aside, I find it sad that this post also perpetuates certain stereotypes about Brazilian culture. Imagine if Tim posted an article in which residents of the United States were portrayed as under-educated and, well, rather narrow-minded, i.e. the stereotype prevalent in many parts of the world. You get the idea.
I realise, though, that you can't please everyone. Indeed, this is part of Tim's (or, rather, his brand's) appeal.
Allow me, however, to add my voice to that of some other commenters with a friendly reminder that male, heterosexual readers are not your only demographic, Tim.
(In case you're wondering, I'm female.)
Thank you for the comment, Choniates.
So can we start an over/under on when these two get divorced. We know the stat is about 50% so its going to be either you or your wife. I kid, I kid…Nice job. Enjoy Miami Beach. I have been working here for quite some time now in marketing and events. Let me know if you need any help with the area.
Great article, great pictures!
Thanks Tim for this post. I first read your book close to 2 years ago and it's molded my thinking ever since. I moved, changed careers, and am in the process of automating all of my business life to working online "virtually" in order to travel worldwide on a regular basis.
This story was inspirational, even if a blatant marketing headline to get guys to click on it.
To be honest I may have still clicked on it if it read… "Husband hunting- How to marry a male Brazilian model" but would not have enjoyed the pictures as much:)
So to all the disgruntled lady's…. I feel your pain, but the author is a single guy…. so it kind of makes a little sense. (plus even most woman can agree that the female figure is more pleasant to the eye than the male figure:)
Either way the story is about taking action on your dreams and going after what you really want in life… plain and simple.
No… actually, I prefer to look at a nice looking man than a female any day of the week… And I'm from Rio
Would love to be known as a country of smart and hard working people than a bunch of good looking women with a few good soccer players….
Another inspiring and fun article, Tim. Thanks so much.
I have been very happily married for over 3 years and feel that the strategies outlined in Ron Louis and David Copeland's book, How To Succeed With Women, were key to meeting, dating and finally marrying my wonderful wife. Come to think of it, only that book can rival FHWW for great advice and insight. They wrote the book by following around and interviewing men who were extremely successful at dating women. What they came up with is extremely affective. The contents of their book is not advice, they say in the introduction, it's "technology." I have long since given my copy away but a number of their tips have stuck with me which I have listed out below.
Within the confines of your genes, make yourself as attractive as possible. That includes cleaning up your car, home, and/or apartment. They suggest cultivating a consistent "look" with clothing and putting some effort into it. They also note that one survey found that women consider a flat stomach to be the most attractive thing about a man so get to the gym which is also a potentially good place to meet prospective dates. (Slow carbs!)
Now that you're as attractive as possible, it's time to go out there and meet people. Introducing oneself to prospective dates can be hard so you can reduce the stakes involved with any one introduction by flirting and introducing oneself to absolutely everyone. That means everyone, including the lunch lady in the cafeteria. It's amazing what this practice can do to one's confidence. The stakes involved with any one conversation are much lower when you have 10 of them a day. Will you still get the cold shoulder every now and then? Of course, but to paraphrase something they repeat in the book, "That's one less person to worry about before finding Ms. Right." Move on.
They include some other tips for starting conversations like asking about the story behind a piece of jewelry or article of clothing. It all gets easier with practice. I liked the advice above regarding meeting people within the context of going about one's normal routines and hobbies. That's good. Some advice by Louis and Copeland regarding how to stay out of what they call the "friend zone" may be particularly useful there. Get labeled a "friend" in the mind of a potential date and it's hard to get that person to view you romantically. They suggest touching the person's hand, looking at her up and down, end up looking her in the eye and smiling. (something I could never build up the courage to do myself though I don't doubt it's effectiveness for a minute!.)
Now that I'm thinking about it, I could go on and on. They have guidelines for appropriate topics for a first date and later dates. They describe how to handle the initial phone calls and voice mail messages — never get mad at not getting called back. Don't even refer to it. Attractive people are busy and get lots of calls. The fastest way to go from a "maybe" to a "no" is to be insecure and upset. Also, never joke about to downplay your physical defects like thinning hair or a widening waistline. I'm telling you, the book is solid gold and well worth the time and money.
I met my wife when she lived two doors down from me in the same apartment building in Philadelphia. It turned out that we had attended the same college in Boston and knew some of the same people. I credit HTSWW for giving me the confidence to introduce myself to her in the hallway and invaluable pointers to how to date and get to know her. The book will definitely increase the likelihood of such success to whoever applies its techniques.
Full disclosure: I have no ties to the authors, publishers, etc. My only interest is a sincere sense of gratitude. Good luck!
Thanks, Benjamin! Great comment!
Benji I'm right now reading the book and I must say it looks extremely promising.
Thank you for sharing this with all of us. I think it's just what I needed in order to be in the game when Ms. Right makes her gentle appearance :).
Have a nice day all
Hi Tim & Jeremiah,
Great blog post, and a brilliant title once more got me to click over from facebook tout de suite.
I have to go to Brazil now! Those girls are gorgeous!
Jeremiah, I think you are an inspiration in the fact that you took action without waiting for a definite outcome to present itself. -You made stuff happen.
It is obvious that what you were doing was intriguing (and ultimately beneficial) to the girls or they would not have modelled for you. And I am sure that they are happy to be friends, not necessarily concerned with money as it is not what you were after at the time.
It sounds like the money dynamic wasn't there at the time, and I would suspect that the results may have been quite different if it was.
So I hope you don't get put off by some of the comments you are getting here.
Chris -
Great post Tim. Anybody who thinks this is misogynistic is probably bitter and/or jealous. Don't hate the player, hate your venti Frappuccino!
As a woman, I've modeled for Playboy and Penthouse only topless. I also work and train with a lot of Brazilian models in bjj.
Tim I think this article is a little irresponsible because it sounds like it's encouraging people to capitalize on young people for sexual purposes, whether that be male or female is not the issue. Something seems off about it…Jeremiah was candid but perhaps too candid and could be misinterpreted.
I have to agree with CS and some of the other women on here. I think their is a fine line between creepshow and win/win situation. Jeremiah shows signs of both. Showing other men how to target women by being something they are not, by showing them how to get them into your car or home doesn't sound 100% ethical. If you are not a real artist, than don't do it to these women.
No model wants to work for free and I don't want you picking my daughter up in your car and taking her home with some empty promise of fame just because you want to date a beautiful woman and this is just your schtick.
Their are a million creeps who already have the same idea who actually prey on young men and women for sex. Those photographers are just annoying as spam or guys who want to hook up.
I see the potential for a business model here, (no pun intended) but no business model is based on getting clients alone in your car and home, work for free just so you can date them!
If marriage to a Brazilian is what you want, surely being genuine will go much further. I think his work is beautiful, that is why he found a model. They have common ground. It is not enough to say I like hot chicks and you are a hot chick so that is a common interest for all you guys who think this is a great idea.
Are you going to write an article for women on where and how to target a rich man to marry? No sarcasm, just really interested on your thoughts about this because it is a viable business model as well, model targets rich men for marriage…
Hi Jacqueline,
I agree that the straw that broke the camel's back in this post was the "back to the house" part. I think there'd be about 10% the criticism if that had been omitted. Hopefully people can, as Bruce Lee recommended, "Accept what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is uniquely your own."
Thank you for commenting,
Oh, thank you! You definitely nailed what I was thinking in response to this article. I'm glad Jeremiah cleared up the compensation issue but it still read a little 'creepy' to me and, yes, Tim, some of that was probably a result of the "back to the house" comment.
Not that I don't love being accused of being unattractive, white, middle class, and a hater for thinking so!
Hey Tim,
It's my first time checking out your blog and I guess I hit you up on quite a controversial post. As an independent woman, a writer, a feminist and a full-time proponent of following your passions, I'm commenting here to thank you and Jeremiah for sharing. I was inspired to read about HOW Jeremiah did what he did; he followed his passion and that takes courage, ambition and drive. I don't care exactly WHAT he did. It would not be MY personal burning desire to photograph Brazilian women and then marry one, but I have a hell of a lot of respect for this man who not only realized his own passion but followed through on it. Keep on keepin' on, my friend.
Tim, on a side note: one of my personal goals is to track you down for a one-on-one lunch. Standby. I'll make it happen.
Thank you for the comment, H.
Jeremiah, what a great story, not to mention the pics, and with a happy ending as well.
I think the women complaining let the pictures drain their brains of any logic. Allow me to critique the critics.
@Lisa "This post made me a little uncomfortable. The case study was actually very good"
then Lisa wrote
"However, it's also rife with exploitation."
Which is it Lisa? Were you 'a little uncomfortable' or did you really feel that it was 'RIFE with exploitation' in which case you should contact the authorities! Big difference between a little uncomfortable and rife with exploitation. If you truly felt it was 'rife with exploitation' you would have written how outraged you were. He explained that several girls move up to Playboy Brazil- a huge step. Maybe their experience gained by him going out there and asking helped them in confidence, experience, photo resume?@Coco
"What nice big boobs and butts! Good for him he married a pair, eh?"That's not what he wrote but you read that into it. He wrote about his wife "We were really connected right from the beginning."
" I was also uncomfortable with how much he got from these models. If this was design, people would be decrying the 'spec' work."
Uh, I don't know if you are familiar with acting Hayden, but people work for FREE all the time. I did community theater, etc. One play took months! I got paid nothing other than the experience and fun. These girls only had to get up at 3am ONE morning and they got FREE photos for their resume. My head-shots cost $100s.
@CS who called him a 'creepshow' and quoted OUT OF CONTEXT "I would invite the girl back to my house so we could look at the photos together on my computer."
"After the shoots, the first question from the girls was always: "When will the photos be ready?"
Sometimes, if I enjoyed the shoot, I would invite the girl back to my house so we could look at the photos together on my computer. Otherwise, I took a few days to do some basic edits, then we'd meet up and I'd give them the best photos."
@CS Their first question was they wanted to see the photos!What I learned is when posting bikini photos in an article, reading comprehension goes out the window for some readers.. And that you must be careful when selling to, writing for, dealing with women because some seem to read and interpret things that are NOT there. Also, some women in America are uptight. Why can't you just take one tiny thing learned from this article and change it, shape it etc so it works for your situation? [ I watched a one hour show with Wayne Dyer- I got only one idea from it, but it was worth it.] Or just stop reading the article.
To critique the "critiquer" of the critics:
Where did the women objecting to this post identify themselves as Americans? Or are you just as guilty of reading something into this that wasn't there as they are?
BTW – Loved the article Tim & Jeremiah very informative.
I've been a big fan for a long time… I have to say that this article made me SICK. Really Tim? Really? I wish I could say this was inspiring. And maybe to the men on your list looking to pick up a beauty form the third world it is, but it reads less like dream fulfillment and personal accomplishment and more like the inner workings of how to get laid.
I know you can do better than this. I've seen it. And I've gained inspiration that has moved me forward! Now I'm ashamed to have recommended your book and site to folks in my network. Don't get me wrong, I'm a sex-positive, BDSM practitioner, and event producer. I'm no prude. But you have marketed a very particular resource here and this article does not live up to the standard.
Will you be doing one on Husband Hunting? How about lovers for queers? What about one that will help me find a charming lesbian submissive? Or if you must, how about an article on Nina Hartley's rise through porn to having her own educational web TV show? Inappropriate? Irrelevant?
Please be more thoughtful in the future. Please continue to be encouraging. Please don't ever dilute your reputation and brand like this again.
Thank you for your comment, !Kona. I truly appreciate it. This post is an example of me pushing the boundaries a bit (thought I didn't expect this strong a response, generally — I must admit) and testing readers' sensitivity to specific topics.
Let me ask, as I really want to know: if there had been no mention of Jeremiah reviewing photos with models at his house, would this post still have bothered you? If so, can you please tell me why?
Thank you again,
It would have still very much bothered ME, for example. Here's why…
It's not because of Jeremiah's story – "photographers" like him are everywhere. His idea of how to get access to hot chicks is not groundbreaking. In my modeling days, as I was building my portfolio, I met my fair share of losers-with-a-camera. They fancy themselves to be artists, but consciously or not, really seek to take the mediocre pictures they do, to jerk off to.
No, it would have bothered me mainly because of your interest and endorsement of this story and the stereotype the post title propagates. It's the presupposition that it should be your readers' dream to marry a woman whose most accurate two-word description would be "Brazilian model".
I guess as a female follower I might have had this fantasy that you were one of those rare, enigmatic men who seeks soulful, earth-shaking romantic adventures, instead of the PUA-mindset subscriber. I might have fantasized that your predominantly male audience were people like how I imagined you to be – reality-benders who lead the world into a more exciting future… including the way men and women relate to each other. Not through sleazy looks-to-cash transactions, but through unions of fully-developed, well-rounded human beings who make magic together. People who relate to each other with integrity and inspiration, instead of the fill-the-void type of mindsets of the past.
Of course, I don't personally know you; I guess I projected on you the qualities of the kind of man I'd respect and desire. Can you blame me? I figured you were not the stereotypical shallow PUA-minded sleaze just because in so many other ways you do break stereotypes and the status quo.
I guess I fantasized that the kind of woman that moved you would be the kind of woman I strive to be – someone fascinating, head-spinning, independent, beautiful of course, but also strong, inspired, and just as reality-bending as you are.
To someone who posted above that the offended women must be bitter – yes I am! But I am not bitter because I feel inferior to these models; in fact, I perceive myself to be much prettier than most of these girls (no offense). But how much credit can I take for my favorable genes? No, I am bitter at the way it is so accepted among men to objectify, dehumanize and "2-D" the way they relate to women. I usually avoid blogs that propagate this mindset. I just didn't expect to find it on Tim's blog.
Tim… I get the whole idea of polarizing the audience, making waves (or in this case, noise) and what not; but by endorsing this story I do feel like you are disrespecting the cool perception people like me might have had of who you are and what you stand for. That's all.
Hi V,
Thanks for the comment. I mean it. Just to respond in my defense, though, you did write:
"I guess as a female follower I might have had this fantasy that you were one of those rare, enigmatic men who seeks soulful, earth-shaking romantic adventures, instead of the PUA-mindset subscriber."
First, I would say that it's unfair to label me "PUA" ("Pick-Up Artist" for those unaware) simply because I posted this on my blog. Jeremiah got married to the girl of his dreams (yes, physical attraction being part of that), and that's what I wanted to emphasize. Sure, the girls are pretty and so on, and headlines get clicks, but I didn't say anything, nor did Jeremiah, to imply these girls have no qualities besides beauty. That would be despicable.
I do seek soulful, earth-shaking romantic adventures, absolutely. But do I also like being with a woman I'm physically attracted to? Most certainly. I don't think that's a bad thing.
All the best,
Yes Tim, I agree. You never said anything remotely referring to the "PUA" community in this post and I apologize, I used the term where I shouldn't have, to mean something else.
The reason I used it is because I meant to liken the 'attitude' of the post to the mindset of the guys in that community, who rate women's VALUE from 1 to 10 based on their physical qualities – only.
Nothing wrong with wanting the woman you date / marry to be beautiful. I'm into hot guys myself, so I feel it's ridiculous to judge anyone for this.
It's just the hint at basing women's value as marriage material on their looks only, suggested by the title. Even if you now say it's not what you believe, and you do care about other qualities too, and so did Jeremiah, it was nonetheless the first impression, and it rubbed some women here the wrong way. The kind of woman who buys the 4HWW and follows your blog will tend to be ambitious, defy stereotypes, and seek independence. So I think it's only natural for her to feel nauseated by this post.
And it just made you look shallow. Perhaps it was the title, more than anything. I had the negative reaction as soon as I saw it in my RSS reader and even before I opened it, so you could say I was already pre-judging whatever the article was going to be about. But then it turned out to be about a pseudo photographer. Ugh. Anyway.
I think you got enough heat on this post already, so I will leave it here. I'm not going to stop following you yet, because you've made a difference in my life and I hope this thing here is not a major direction you're taking your brand into.
Thanks again for the comment, V. You'll notice that I've changed the blog post title
Yes, I noticed… I'm glad you did.
I love this, it was a fantastic read Tim. The crazy thing is that your guy Hans, he was a good friend of my brother Mike. I remember going to his frat parties at Stanford back in the days. This lets me know how cool of a person you are. Keep inspiring us to live the life we're ment to live Tim!!
Latin American is a great place to met women. I have been to Costa Rica and Colombia. Currently I have a girl friend in Bogota. I am studying to get my ESL certificate. I hope to sell most of my stuff and take a mini-retirement teaching English in Latin America. To quote a song by the band Gomez "See the World, find and old fashion girl"
Wow…How ironic to see this post today!
I just came back 2 days ago from my 2 month mini retirement in Buenos aires (thanks Tim for the inspiration!)… and 10 (spontaneous) days in Rio after the Brasilenhia-on-vacation-phenomena Charlie experienced in BsAs as well.
I guess the bottom point that hits ME reading this post is to Enjoy every moment of the lovely things you are doing…make sure work doesnt take away your life joy!
Jeremiah had a multi-million dollar company at a young age but got overworked and took the (probably) difficult but crucial step to do something else. And now he really got the edge!
Are we enjoying what we are doing most of the time? If not, maybe It`s time to step up and do something about it!?
We should experience, see, taste and hear new things more often…it stimulates excitement and wellness!The hard thing for me, to be honest. Is that I`m a creative person, a massive thinker of nature and I`m fighting to get better at more action and less procrastination.
Anyone got some good tips to overcome this?Tim, I remember you referred to Norwegian women as one of the worlds most beautiful women… Are you every coming back here?
Bring your snowboard and camera for easter to see all the beautiful girls sun-tanning in the slopes here.Looking forward to reading The four-hour body as I have personally experienced massive "muscle memory" restoration in short periods both with and without the Colorado project as a base. I`ve also studied NLP who made me realize the amazing capabilities the human mind has over the physical body. Wonder if you have any takes on this!
Patiently waiting for your book.
Un fuerte abrazo!
Bendik -
Another great story for making your dreams come true. I give my hat off to Jeremiah for going for his dreams.
Tim, your book has tremendously inspired me as well. In 2008, I was living in a 2000 sq foot house, married, with a lots of stuff, and working like crazy… But in deep in my heart I knew I was not doing what I wanted in life, I knew I was not married to the person I truly wanted to share my life with, and I knew I was not living in the place I really wanted (In Louisiana at the time).
So, I got divorced, sold everything I had, packed my stuff in a small 24ft B class RV and took off to travel and I have been in that path every since, now salsa dancing in San Francisco and attempting to win the world salsa championships, traveling to Grand Canyon with my RV, and blogging about my Urban Mobile Lifestyle.
Thank you for all that you do! I think you are doing a fantastic job presenting controversial topics with great taste and sensitivity and not coming off as a jerk! That is definitely a skill that I want to cultivate more as well! All of the best!
Hey Tim – just saw the Facebook post, testing what happens after "submit." Hopefully I can help out.
Bwahahaha! Now I understand why my husband insisted on getting two signed copies!
A good story to read. Jeremiah puts himself in the position he likes. The world is always inclined. Just check our position. ?!
Female commenter, formerly subscribed to mailing list but now unsubscribed.
I thought there was a punch line to this post and kept reading the ridiculousness to the end when I realized that it was written with all seriousness. The women photographed are beautiful but agreed that the context was sexist and racist…
I had been unclear for some time whether Tim Ferriss was a hack taking advantage of the fact that some people in the world today have it easy and some do not, but it is clear to me now.
Thank you. I will not waste my time anymore.
The topic of "how to meet people for dating" is interesting, so it would be helpful to continue to have blog posts on the topic of dating.
It seems to me that more women from other countries are more feminine and many of these women genuinely enjoy being a sensual feminine woman.
Another article could be about the legal issues of how to go about bringing back a new girlfriend or wife to your country.
After reading the 4HWW, I looked into hiring models for photography projects, but it can be expensive to hire models.
I am a single man seeking a woman for dating and this very interesting blog post opened me up to the idea that there is a world of opportunities. I am now excited to travel to some new countries to do business, have new experiences, and to meet new people! -
Very refreshing post. Just shows you can do whatever you want in life. I am assuming he was making money from his businesses though while in Brazil to support himself.
"If you're happily married, how did you meet your husband or wife, and do you think someone could engineer the same?"
Oh no! I think Tim is getting ready to settle down.
I am born, raised and still living in Florianópolis because of stuff like this. I highly recommend anyone on the earth to meet this place. Not just for the girls, the town is awesome.
Totally true. The surf, the people, the food — all amazing.
Um abraco,
Great story!
Jeremiah, this would make a great iphone/android app. You already have all the content so it would be fairly easy to get things up and going.
If you want someone to do the leg work for drop me a line.
why is my comment awaiting moderation from yesterday?
Hi Jacqui,
I actually read my comments, but I don't check every day. Checking them out now…
I must agree with some of the women on here. I found this post SUPER creepy…seriously. I thought it was going to be more of a dating guide. Which would be interesting.
I'm just so skeeved out after reading this. Ick.
I don't care if this is published or not, but just so you know, I've been an ardent but quiet follower of yours for years, promoted your books, site, and philosophy to many. You lost me on this one, dude. Too "boys club" for me, I unsubscribed.
I'm sorry, Fiona. That wasn't my intention. I hope you find more content that you like, and my apologies that this one turned you away.
All the best,
Tim – the fact that you cared about my point of view is making me reconsider. Thank you.
Hi all!
The 4HWW Book byTimothy is amazing! I read it all in one breath. After that I decided to quit my boring office job. Put all my travel things to my backpack and set up to the world to experience more exciting life. You know what I mean, half year work close to sea, second half work directly in mountains and enjoy snow and everywhere meet new people and hunt girls as wellNote, I had really very small budget just for one month without income. The reality was hard. I was not lucky to find job, so after all money spent I had to go back to home. Its really bad without money Why I tell you this unhappyend story? At home I realised something. I wasnot honest to myself. I went abroad to hunt girls, but very deep in my heart I feel I want to have only one girl for whole life really.
some people wrote here about spreadsheet with points you would like to meet by your partner. I absolutely agree. This is very important thing! You must be very specific who you are looking for. But I have to add one very important note:
You must be very honest in all facts you write down to the paper.In fact I want one lifepartner, but I went abroad to hunt girls. Does anybody know why? Maybe I am not sufficient strong to believe I will find the right partner, maybe I simply copied behaviour from the rest of the society. But at this moment I know. This is not the right way. I must be honest to my wishes, what I really want. And find out that, it seems to be so hard sometimes. grrr
what you think?
Because there is a lot of shiny words about what should you do to have exciting life. And somebody can adopt this style persuaded to himself this is what he really want. But firstly, he should ask only himself.It is little bit danger to read these energizing comments. Because then you can write to your spreadsheet that you want a lot of sex, you want to live with brazil girl, etc… but in fact you want to have sex rarely, you want be married with girl from your country.
nevertheless thankyou very for Tim's books and these blogs. It really opens new life perspectives. To everybody: Lets follow OUR dreams!
I've been living in South America for the last couple years, and its laughable to me now that some people are "offended" by this post. Why…because there are a few pictures of beautiful girls in bikinis? Maybe a trip to South America would help change the perception of some that the female figure and openness about sex isn't necessarily offensive.
The story is inspirational. This guy had a dream and went after it and achieved it.
A side note: For all the guys on here who think they can just land down in any latin american city and start dating models, I would have to say think again. It's not as easy it it may sound.
Hey Jeremiah, you imply that you'd anticipate your contest winner would be a guy – any reason why a woman couldn't win the contest? And maybe look at producing a "Boys of Brazil" calendar? Probably a smaller market but I can't believe that only the women are attractive there.
Laura, I'm sure Jeremiah would be game. Sadly for American men, perhaps, the boys take as good care of themselves down in Brazil (Rio, at least) as the women. Athletic country all around.
Hi Laura
My wife and her girlfriends have talked many times about starting up the "Guys of Brazil" calendar. They probably would have a lot of success. I've never seen so many six packs in my life outside of the movie "300″. The foreign women who visit are always just as blown away by how beautiful Brazilians are.
In regards to the contest, nothing has been set in place yet but of course it would be open to everyone. Actually I have a lot of respect for how some women photographers have such a great talent for making beautiful photos of other women.
Yes Laura, some of the biggest male models come from Brazil.. they make a speedo look HOT!!!
You should do it!!
New goals: I'm going to take up photography as a new hobby within the next 12 months and then making a trip to Buenos Aires within the next 5 years.
Hey Jeremiah and Tim,
I thought about it a bit though, and I don't think I could do it even if you were awesome enough to extend the opportunity to me. Jeremiah, I think you should sell screen savers in addition to printed calendars though, they'd definitely sell and you could just make them an amazon download.Peace,
Sean -
men are attracted to physical beauty 80% and personality 20%
women are attracted to physical attractiveness 20% and personallity 80%
personally i thnk its more but that how evolution designed up because of the internal economics that govern our behavior
stop bashing on men for their desires are trying to make us think like women we don't want to think like women because it doesn't do up as good to evolutionarylastly when it comes to having standards and preferences everyone has their own that's what makes them unique
beauty is one of the traits men look for its a major one get use to it you women put on make up and lie to us and clothes that highlight features and go to clubs and say oh i just like to dance, yeah right like evolution doesn't have a hidden agenda there you could of stayed and danced in your room if oyu love the music so much and bought the drinks for a lot cheaper and invited ur friends you go there for attention you go there for men and then you backwards rationalize ur emotions to solidify ur internal realityi have seen so many women attacking other women, the decisions of other men, the actions of other men, its a mating game darling get with the program you obviously know nothing about men, mind ur own business, in life you do what works to get you closer to what you want, and you sure as hell don't have to justify it to strangers who need to comment because they have no life of their own
Hi Tim,
Interesting selection of title pictures for the recent posts..
Any chance you're bumping up testosteron levels to increase uptake of the 4-hour Body??Married to a Brazilian beauty myself. Great country and culture.
Keep up the excellent work.
Thanks, Bjorn. Perhaps it's just me getting stir crazy in winter, but the testosterone could have something to do with it! That's been a project recently. Totally serious
Um abraco,
I find it really amusing that some women take a post like this as an affront to them personally – get over yourselves! No one has chosen you to represent all of womenkind. These women are beautiful and have been given an opportunity to showcase themselves and add to potential modelling portolios etc. They are just as opportunistic as Jeremiah. Stop being so up yourselves PC and insecure. Good on the girls and Jeremiah – if you've got it -flaunt it I say..
I think this was a great article and especially enjoyed the happy ending! Oh yeah, I am a woman and also have a PhD in a technical field from one of the top universities in the U.S. I read the text carefully and found the story to be interesting. If anything I feel inspired to get to the gym more often and to start to go run the stadium steps! Thank you for this post.
Thanks, Elsie
Marrying a beautiful woman [Brazillian models included] is one of the most logical and fun thing to do after a person has achieved financial success. I remember reading from Napoleon Hill that wealth without women is vain.
Tim, for those who bought 4 copies of your updated version of 4HWW last year and are supposed to receive and advance-copy of 4 Hour Body, when are those going out?
Hey Jesse,
Next 5 days! Just got my copy about a week ago, so you're right at the front of the line
All the best,
Thanks. I didn't read the article, I just came here for the pics.
I love how some people think those who are offended have 'issues' with the pictures on the site or are 'insecure'.
That is sad.
The pictures on this site are SO 'tame' seriously. hahaThe story is creeeepy.
-An attractive woman from Recife
after spending years in academia promoting critical thinking and analysis of mass media, I gotta say this post is pretty low on the 'offense-o-meter' compared to the daily onslaught of ads that link beauty with products… all while helpfully reminding us – ladies & gents alike – how bad we smell, look and feel so we can keep buying stuff that will never deliver that airbrushed/slenderized perfection.
a nice, bold post and great contribution from Michael with the list…I'll give it a whirl! (and spend more time on the beach, too…:)
I had to laugh at people getting upset like Ikona.
Give me a break!!!!!!!!You told a story about a fellow who thought what he wanted to do was impossible to ACHIEVE.
He ends up falling in Love with one of his models. I think it's really cool. It gives the rest of us hope. I have lived here in the Bay area and just would love to find a normal gal who is bright AND ATTRACTIVE.
If you ask me,, looks like this guy hit the jackpot. It's his wifes attitude. That is what is attractive.
The girls who like me live in other countries and my passport seems to be in purgatory. I dream of traveling like you do, never mind meeting these type of gals.You keep it up Tim. Your honest with the man in the Mirror. At the end of the day. That is all that counts. BRAVO !!!!
YEY! Now do a "Boyfriend-Hunting: How to Date a Spanish Futbolista"!
Hi, I'm Amar.
(Tim, please approve this comment. This girl could be the one! lol)
Haha, cute.
How was your Thanksgiving ?
I commend you for sacrificing your Saturday night to personally reply back to many comments on your blog. I really hope you don't lose many readers because of one post that "might" be a bit controversial.(seriously, it's not.) Since you take good care of your readers, I personally believe your blog will be stronger, better and more popular.
*Ladies, I find female readers of Tim's blog to be incredibly attractive.*
I got the travel bug again reading this post. I had to enlist a friend's help to flush the travel bug out of me this time. I caught the bug from reading your recent posts, but I was able to retain sanity by tearing my hair out. Unfortunately, that was not enough this time. So my friend (all too enthusiastically) agreed to slap my face silly. I also consumed a large amount of Glühwein which helped a lot. As it is the season to be grateful, I thank you for the experience.
On a side note, I am really impressed with your reading and typing speed. I noticed that your replies were only a one or two minutes between each other. Amazing! I know of your speed reading techniques, but how do you type so fast ? It takes me ages to type a single post. (even typing this comment took embarrassingly long.)
I would like to mention about the stickers, though. I was finally able to order the stickers today. (Yay!) But I have to tell you it wasn't easy. I had to collect 20 on-line stickers to be able to order physical stickers. It wasn't a simple task as the site lacks explanation of how to obtain each online sticker. If they would clearly display requirements (time of day, check-ins and etc) for each sticker, it would be a much simpler and enjoyable experience using the site. Please pass this suggestion along if you can.
It is a shame that It takes so long to get physical 4 hour work week stickers. The stickers were a great marketing idea. But I fear that I will not receive the stickers by the time your book launches, losing the chance to promote your book via handing out awesome stickers. bummer.It's five am. Time for more Glühwein and sleep.
Hi David,
Thanks for the comment! Ah, Gluhwein. I remember it fondly from winters in Berlin. Love that stuff. Dangerous, though.
I'm pretty fast with WordPress, so that probably explains the speed. I respond in the comment moderation and wish I could do the same for e-mail! Another story, perhaps.
I also agree that GetGlue is pretty confusing. Sorry about that!
Your feedback will get passed to the CEO.
Pura vida,
I don't think Tim or Jeremiah is a misogynist.
I was pay attention more to what did Jeremiah do to make his dream comes true. This is what it excite me. Overall, Jeremiah showed how he adapt through his experience become a better person working with models. Is he a bad person, no.
Jeremiah is a testimony to 'livin your dream'.
Aside from Jeremiah and Tim, like Tim mentioned of his female friends who confessed of what do they really want. They are right. Go back to Ellsworth's article reading eye contact. The eye contact and other interpersonal skills I used have gained me an insight what I thought was right. I found I have been wrong and I have become unconventional.
Seek further and connecting more and your mind will change and you will see the undistorted reality. This is what Tim is doing and it sometime is hard to accept. Tim have done this with lot of thoughts before he executed. Tim is real deal. This is what I see in his writing.
What an inspiring post. It makes everything crazy seem within reach.
My husband found me in a green apron behind a Starbucks espresso machine. He said he only saw my eyes for the longest time.
His pursuit was relentless.
We eloped last June and now we work from home in our PJs. Life couldn't get any sweeter. We both read this blog regularly and we're loving the book too.
I hadn't looked over all of the comments before, until just now, but just somewhat skimmed them, and again as someone who really enjoyed this article I would just like to also mention that I am the current and past Chair of major women's organizations (and am personally an extremely active supporter of women in technical fields) who encourage women to support technical fields. (Can't say too much b/c how many women have a PhD from one of the consistently top 3 universities in my field in the US and are so active as I am?). Maybe I really liked this post as I am comfortable also with my looks. And I'm going spinning today for 1.5 hours, thanks to this post! Again, much gratitude, Tim.
Thanks so much for this Elsie! It's good to see you and some of the other women say you don't have a problem with this post.
Tim put in an attention grabbing headline. He's a genius for that. But for those who read the article they can see it is not about marrying but rather taking a dream and making it happen.
The post was an interview between two guys and it was intended for a men's interest magazine. We didn't change anything prior to letting it run in Tim's blog. Sorry to Tim for that! He's gotten a lot of negative comments and it's clear some tweaking could have been done to prevent most of this.
This was not meant as a blueprint for men to run to Brazil and become swimsuit photographers. Rather to show how somebody took his dream and made it happen. Things are rarely as difficult as we build them up to be. It usually just comes down to taking the action and of course this story was hopefully going to be an inspiring one about what can happen when you do act on a dream.
When I went to Brazil it wasn't to find my wife or even to shoot photos of women. I went there because I wanted to surf. But seeing the beautiful women made me want to take my dream of becoming a swimsuit photographer and make it happen. I wound up fallen in love through the process and marrying an incredibly special person.
My wife supports this project every bit as much as I do. I've shot photos of all of her girlfriends. This is just something that is culturally different than in the US. These girls enjoy being beautiful and who can blame them for that?
I'm a pretty simple guy and my intentions are always genuine. That by itself is probably the biggest reason I was successful when speaking with these girls about making the photos.
Of the last 30 girls I have shot, every single one of them had jobs including 2 dentists & a psychologist. No kidding. One was a student but she still had a job. Thirty beautiful girls and every single one of them had a job, that's incredible! I don't think the people commenting negatively are giving these Brazilian women enough credit.
I'm sorry we didn't do a better job of preparing the interview before it was
posted to Tim's blog. We thought we had a nice story for both men and women and continue to feel the same about that. Thanks everyone who did like this story!!-
If you had always wanted to be a photographer – if that was always your calling – I'd respect this "dream come true" explanation you're pounding on. But it's obvious that your original motivation for these calendar projects was to meet and interact with the "beautiful women" you saw in Brazil – not to actualize your love for the art of photography.
You say "This was not meant as a blueprint for men to run to Brazil and become swimsuit photographers."
Yet, funnily enough, I saw quite a few responses by men who are all of a sudden inspired to go to Brazil and present themselves as photographers, in order to meet and date swimsuit models.
I mean, doesn't this post start with "How to…", after all?
I've met many guys like this, who "become" photographers only to gain access to beautiful women. It's creepy and icky.
Jeremiah, you don't strike me as a bad person. You obviously create some value, for some guys, with your calendars. You might not be a world-class photographer, but there's obviously a niche for the things you do, and I respect that.
It's just that I thought Tim a more sophisticated guy. This post was sleazy, and it's disappointing to see it on Tim's blog.
At first I thought "Hey this post is a little… um…." but is this story anything else than a testimony of how easy it really is to photograph a beautiful girl in her bikini? I'm sure it would work just as well in any country.
"Hey I'm a photographer and you are really beautiful. Can I take your picture?". How many percent would say no to that? Pressuming ofcourse that we are somewhat happy with the way we look and that the guy is obviously genuine I think most of us would be very flattered. -
I read your book while spending 6 months in Poland and Germany, and had a journey of discovering Relevance in my life. I'm struggling with applying your principles, God help me, but I can't go back to "normal" life. But even back in Australia, most people have the live to work mind set, and say I'm/your a dreamer.
Which leads me to ask, Tim, if you have managed to find companion who can fit into such a lifestyle and sees the world so differently? Their are beautiful women everywhere, you should know, but its the character and inner beauty that keeps you long past the external looks have waned. Is this post a sub/conscious expression of your desire, a wife? Are you not interested in a committed relationship atm and staying a bachelor? Or do you prefer to keep such matters private? -
Posts like this are why I'm such a big fan of yours, Tim!
I'm surprised to return to this post after initially reading it to find negative comments. I think some people might be missing the point, which can (perhaps easily) get overshadowed by the Brazilian supermodel aspect.
What people should really take away is: "Jeremiah took a chance by traveling to ______ to successfully pursue his dream of _________." The rest are just additional, specific details.
Looking forward to the book, keep up the great work! (And congratulations Jeremiah!)
Agree with you Alex!
It`s easy to forget the core message of the post….I must admit myself those photos erupted my mind to illusions being back in Brazil…
I guess those photos made many people forget about the content!
Hi Tim, Jeremiah,
I really enjoyed this post and found the photos absolutely breathtaking! I think what I liked the most, is that these photos weren't "selling" sex. No pouty lips, spread legs, etc. These women all had genuine smiles that reached their eyes. Very classy.
My only objection is to some of the comments on here about "getting a Brazilian wife." It seems to me that Jeremiah's goal was to photograph swimsuit models, and discovered that Brazil would be the best place to get started, meeting the woman of his dreams was due to the both of them being in the right place at the right time – and hitting it off.
Women, where ever we are from, are humans. Not commodities to be bought or "gotten." Even if those comments were made tongue-in-cheek, it still reveals the underlying belief of the person making the comment. If someone is going to visit Brazil (or any country that is foreign to you) – go for the experience of seeing new things, learning about a different culture, learning a new language or languages, and meeting fascinating and, yes, beautiful people, inside and out. And if, during this adventure, you meet the other half of your soul – well, then, you were both in the right place at the right time!
Just one more comment to add, the only thing I didn't like about this post was the title. While I realize that it is/was an attention grabber, it was the most dehumanizing, insulting part of this post. I think that there are more creative ways to grab attention than that.
Tim, I'm a relatively new reader and this post unfortunately turned me off. I'm not vowing never to come back or anything, just wanted to let you know.
I don't have any real problem with anything Jeremiah himself did, but to have this presented as a "how-to" guide strikes me as icky. It's putting "hot wife" on the check list of stuff to acquire to be happy – common enough of a sentiment, but not really in the spirit of the 4HWW as I understand it.
One way to tell if something is misogynistic or not is to read the responses to it – not just from the offended, but from those who are enthusiastically approving of it. So far in this comments section women have been accused of being jealous, illogical, and bitter (and all without any argument or rebuttal from you.) Stay tuned for the inevitable "every woman who objects to this is fat and ugly" responses, also.
Hi Lydia,
Thank you for the comment. To be honest, I've been to busy responding to the women to respond much to the men! Please see some of my responses.
As it relates to men calling any female critics of this post "jealous, illogical, etc." — it is, of course, ridiculous. I think there are both intelligent and ridiculous responses in the comments from both genders. Plenty of impulsive and unnecessary name-calling on both sides.
Hope that helps!
When reading Jeremiah's entrepreneur upbringing, it makes me happy to know that I am actively inspiring my 2 daughters (age 3 and 5) to think about their creativity and entrepreneur potential (maybe not selling rocks to neighbors, yet).
I have been a creative designer, life hacker and thing inventer for a long time, but never really persued any design idea for development. Most of it is just for fun or sport. Inspiration from Tim finally got me off my arse toward ultimately doing something productive about my ultimate goals. Jeremiah has cemented my resolve to stop dreaming about it and just get started. Thanks!
I responded once before but after watching the comments pile in I feel like chiming in again,….from the highly educated female perspective once again (which by the way I am pretty sure your female audience is extremely highly educated),….
I think you might be touching on a deeper lying issue in our "go for it highly educated we are all equals" culture,…at least the one we find in the more liberal and U.S. enclaves. (And, hay, I think that has been an awesome and important step in the right direction,…but we can keep going in terms of how it is affecting our relationships!!)
This might be controversial again,….but David Deida has been doing some interesting writing about this phenomenon (which okay I myself discovered by traveling/volunteering in South America & Asia and meeting men from other cultures outside of the U.S., including Brazil). Here in the U.S. at least we have this tendency to want to mate in a "we are all equal" way that neutralizes sensuality and sexuality (grant it that is far better than the previous relationship model, for men and women). We women were trained in more liberal areas to be admired for our brains instead of our looks,….so actually this post could instantly simply fire off (yes, the wiring) that was programmed in during this life,…..to say,…."I am more than a body". Unfortunately though some of this programming shut down the fun and awesome part of being a human! Sensuality! And I happen to know that men are not the only ones seeking this outside of the U.S. (oftentimes only to realize what is actually awesome about men/women here),….anyway, it is a two way street phenomenon.
What I like about this post,….is that you are kind of throwing this kind of "guess what we still like to be hot and like to admire hot" thing out there into a highly educated crowd,…..and maybe helping to push this notion that we can be "equals" and we can also seduce each other and enjoy being in great shape on the inside and the outside (we can have our cake and eat it too). Obviously,….like you have stated in your thread and others have reiterated,…there is a lot more that goes into a relationship,..and ultimately love must look beyond shape to fully blossom as actual love,…but I think it is narrow-sighted (and actually requires compassion) that we instantly think of "objectification" when we think of men or women wanting to admire, well, someone who is hot.
I'd actually love it if as an entire culture we could invite in some South American sizzle into our lives. Adding that to our intellectual culture, and our equality,…..well that would be fun. And when I say "some", I mean that,…its a bit intensely aggressive down there for us from the north! Whoa!
Anyway,….please know,….some of my work has been absolutely heart breaking in some of the highest (child) sex trafficking areas of Brazil (that serve the negative side of what this post, and these pictures, are demonstrating in cultural "wiring" when the desire goes perverse),….yet,…..just because people take things to the extreme does not mean it is all extreme.
And,….I think I wasn't as offended by the title/etc. because it is also obvious that Jeremiah is really good at what he does,…like other commenters have said,…..if you don't have the actual skill you will get the boot. (And obviously the title was used to suck us in which Tim actually teaches about in detail in the 4HWW so why would that surprise us? Its kind of obvious he is testing his crowd for where he's heading with the new book, or at least, that's my guess.) I also think we can be more open minded about what people enjoy doing, and choose into doing, when it is not actually hurting anyone. There are many paths to walk in life.
That's my two more cents. Thanks for all of the thoughts everyone! Quite an interesting, intelligent and unique crowd on here!
Thank you for your very thoughtful comment, Rhea! Deida definitely has some good material, and — like you said — "just because people take things to the extreme does not mean it is all extreme."
For what it's worth, I do think that the very American emphasis on de-polarizing men and women causes just as many problems as it solves. Men and women are different, and it's incredible when we embrace those differences to the betterment of both sides. Tango is a wonderful embodiment of this.
All the best,
Thanks for the response Tim, and Tango, thank you, the perfect illustration.
Holy comments! Glad I checked back on this one.
First, I should clarify that, like most of the other women
who commented here, I have no problem whatsoever
with photos of women. Just ask my wife. I was just generally
creeped out by the whole thing, and especially about the money
thing.Kudos to the intelligent, articulate women and men who
commented here.
Boo to the women and men who say that because a woman
finds this creepy, she must be bitter, jealous, uptight and unattractive.
Boo to the condescending tone of some of these comments. -
Hi Tim,
I know I'm late chiming in on the subject, but I'm a firm believer in, "What's good for the goose is also good for the gander". So, in the spirit of fairness I have to ask, are there going to be any articles on how to become the photographer for Abercrombie & Fitch or the CK underwear campaign if you're a woman? Those have been dreams of mine since the rise of the Male Super Model. (Good times, good times.) I was a preteen then so, trust me some women grow up with the same parallel fantasy. But fantasy aside, I'd love to know your thoughts, and if you need someone to test those theories for you, I'd be more then game.
P.S. In the new book, you describe the technique for giving a woman a 15 minute O. Are there any plans for the opposite view? Have to keep that new hubby happy! Just saying…
Hi Michelle,
It's a good idea. I'm up for it, but I don't know as many female photographers. If you can find someone who'd make a good female case study, I'm happy to do it! Just send amy-at-fourhourworkweek-dot-com a link to the person's website and indicate I asked for it in a blog response.
As for the hubby's happiness, there are a few chapters on testosterone that will make him happy, and the "O" chapter will be enjoyable for him, too
All the best,
Just a note on the paying the models issue, not sure if this has already been addressed -
When starting out, many models have to pay to have their photos taken for their portfolio. This has been the experience of most of my friends who model (East coast, USA). If he wasn't charging the girls for the photos and allows them to use them for their portfolio, then that is a better deal than many girls starting out get!
What a bunch of overreactions……. sheesh. The only part that I could disagree with is the title…"wife-hunting"? But I also didn't like "4 hour WW", and didn't read your book for a couple years because of it. (Too much like a RE huckster, to be honest, IMO)
But the content of this article was fine- the ideas were workable, and it fits with your lifestyle design idea. It even had an actual businessman that applied your principles and went out of the office to another part of the world.
I recall a Tony Robbins story where he was doing an appearance in Denver and a pimp came up to him with some of his "ladies" and thanked him, and gave him all the credit; uncomfortable, TR said…. with the point being that a good idea works in a lot of situations. If we replace the photog with John Fielder and nature photos, there is no controversy. But the whiff of "sexuality" seems to suspend that appreciation of what the guy did. Oh well……
Would these same women commenting complain if it was a female photographer taking photos of men in speedos? How hypocritical.
I guess you didn't have bad intentions here Tim, but the kind of materials and the kind of attitude you promote on this post are underlying components of what makes daily harassment and abuse of women into a social norm.
It's not just "perverts" who harass and assault women; it's mostly ordinary men, who are being told day after day that treating women like brainless pieces of meat is normal and justified, and behave accordingly.
Do take a look at ihollaback.org to get a better idea of how the women around you live their daily lives, and if you still don't see the connection, please go ahead and Google "rape culture". Whether you like it or not, and regardless of your intentions, you are now part of this culture.
Seriously Tim, I hate to unsubscribe, but supporting you is like shooting myself in the foot. Couldn't you find a more intelligent and less damaging way to promote your book?
I'm proud to include myself in the 2-5% of followers that you don't mind losing due to this post. I know you declared that losing us didn't matter to you, but does it matter to you that you lost face?
Thank you, well put.
Maybe it's difficult for men to empathize with women. They've never experienced what we are subjected to by men every day, throughout our adult life (actually even in childhood, for many of us). The sexual harassment, the perception of you as weak, not as smart, not as important, not as valuable as men…
Men are so into this whole idea of their supremacy sometimes, that they don't even see how offensive they are to us. They think it's a compliment to us when they treat us like the latest Porsche model that they dream of buying.
The sad thing is that many women still believe this too, and they act this way, and they think their highest self-actualization in life can will from marrying a successful man. They read David Deida and say, oh how true, because that's what I see in old movies and that's how it is in old books, and that's how my parents were. Ugh.
But it doesn't have to be this way! It's in conversations like this throughout the world where the future is shaped, and I am proud of the women here who spoke out and let the men know that it's NOT OK and we won't be just sitting and taking this treatment.
It may seem like an overreaction, but every time we keep quiet about this, is like we're slapping ourselves in the face. In the past 50 years here in the most developed country in the world we have proven we're just as good as men are, and we don't have to sit and take this treatment any longer.
No offence intended: so, what you're saying: a guy can't say a girl is hot at all?
Likewise, a woman can't say that about a guy?
We aren't allowed to honour our primitive need for an attractive mate? I want that in a partner (as does my gf in me). I don't think there's anything wrong with it.
I can totally say yep, those girls are smoking: doesn't mean I think they don't have brains (look at any number of supermodels with side businesses: smart businesswoman – Elle McP a good example).
Notwithstanding the very real and valid comments you make about the objectification of women (I'm a guy and I object to marketing appealing to me with overtly sexual images of women ALL THE TIME, so I'm on your side there).
Maybe I missed your point.
Perhaps the images in this post went a bit overboard in explaining the process.
Wow. Yes there are some scummy men out there, but there are just as many women who take advantage of men out there and behave like children because, "I'm a girl so it's ok." Most men are not like this and neither are most women so stop playing the victim. And for the record I don't think you're less smart than a man because of your gender, or your looks, I think so because your an adult who in your last post used the word "icky." Grow up.
Tim — this was a great post, thanks for keeping it real.
I have to admit I saw this post and had no desire to read it because of the title, but after seeing some of the comments that came on your FB page I decided to see what it was all about.
The title was a bit misleading, which is why some of the woman "took offense", but seriously what is offensive about a a guy that loves to take pictures, loves woman, makes it his life and falls in love? Sounds like more of a chick flick to me!!
I love to hear about people that follow a dream and make it happen, good on you Jerimiah for living in your bliss, and finding the girl of your dreams.
My husband and I met surfing in the water 13 years ago….and are celebrating 7years of marriage today. Love can be found anywhere even if you are not looking!
Thanks for sharing your story and best to you on the project.
FYI TF~ the sticker from get glue of the guy looking down on his abs/package…now that is creepy!
Keep living large!
Rhonda Swan~ Mother of The Unstoppable Family
Some of the comments
Thanks, Rhonda! LOL on the "guy looking at his package" comment. That's hysterical. I'll tell the model. He'll love it.
I might be late to the party, but wanted to chime in anyway: I'm on a popular amateur modeling site trying to get started and it's very common to do work for no pay. The photographer gets to add to their portfolio and you get to add to yours.
This post rubbed me the wrong way at first, but I can easily see a post about an enterprising woman traveling to an exotic country entitled "husband-hunting" being posted here just as easily. Of course, then the comments would be about how it made women look shallow.. we really can't win.
It's actually been stated in a few comments here (from men) that men are the more shallow….one mentioned that guys care about looks 80% compared to woman at 20%……………..and he's probably right….
As far as winning is concerned in the battle of the sexes……it doesn't really work with this situation.
If Tim had a bunch of dudes in banana hammocks on a "Husband Hunting" post, most women wouldn't even relate to it because they're simply not as shallow as men……….and most (straight) men wouldn't even get past the first picture before getting nauseated and losing interest.
Most guys wouldn't threaten to unsubscribe but instead they'd probably just be confused and then question Tim's sexuality……(J/k Tim:) so it's probably not worth it…. but if anyone would try it, I'd have to agree that Tim would:)
It's already a given that Tim will be making a post targeting to make you ladies happy, so wait and enjoy it when it gets here…and at least for my own sake, I hope it doesn't involve pictures of guys in bikinis. (Lets all be honest and admit that the bulk of society really doesn't want to see that)
Maybe pictures of shirtless guys with pants on or guys in board shorts, but even the most fit guy looks like a tool when wearing a banana hammock…… so from a logistical standpoint it's simply not practical.
I'm of course joking a bit, but there's a grain of truth in every joke….
good on you jeremiah for living in your bliss and finding the girl of your dreams.
Are you a Deida fan by chance? You really took one for the team here man. =)
Haha… I haven't read to much of his work, but The Way of The Superior Man is a very practical read. I don't agree with all of it, but I agree with most of it.
@Christine wrote " I was just generally
creeped out by the whole thing, and especially about the money
I previously wrote that I as a man have done LOTS of FREE theater, plays, heck I even PAID to do a class and perform. I had fun!
Christine I don't think you are "bitter or unattractive" just uneducated of how things work. geez -
Looks like guys will be boycotting Amazon. Look what I found! 56 books with the title "Husband Hunting" ewwww how 'creepy'and this title too
Husband Hunting Made Easy : And Other Miracles for the Modern Gay Man [Paperback]
==================Please American men, stand up to these complainers. Be a man. Think. Do some research like I did. None, absolutely none of what these complainers mentioned is true.
Hi Tim/Jeremiah
wow, you certainly got allot of reaction on this one. I have to give kudos to Jeremiah for his sharing something so personal. We are talking about how he found his wife. I think that is as personal as one can get.
I liked the fact that he came back today to stick up for the women he photographed. They all had other jobs. I found his post a "breath of Fresh Air".My heart goes out to you Tim, in your responding to all the women that have posted negatively. I love what you said on another post. That "several women did admit with the Honesty that comes from a few drinks, that they just would not marry a man who was not successful at his profession".
The reality is that even in today's society of womens liberation. Man is expected to be the gatherer, ( a great catch) . That is just the cold hard truth. Tim, I am looking forward to running into you someday. From that little Island across the bay bridge
To cut off any ad-hominem attacks against what I will say, I am not a woman–I'm a heterosexual male combat veteran with two tours in the Middle East under my belt. (Don't thank me; thank my recruiter.)
1) Great post. Full of insight, humor, and highly motivating.
2) Terrible title. I agree with Ms. Kirsten Lew: while I understand why you crafted such a title, it set a lurid tone for the rest of the article. Once they got to reading (and looking), people ignored it because, hey, in advertisement, sex sells! But for your would-be detractors/unsubscribers/critics, it raised their hackles before reading the case-study, and it was up to the individual's personal bias/experience to harp on a detail (be it that Jeremiah didn't pay the girls at first, or that sometimes he took them home to conduct business, or even that roughly 50% of the comments can be reduced to I-love-exotic-t!ts-and-@ss-gimme-gimme). Many people have pointed out that as compelling as it was, the Brazilian models aspect was just a detail of Jeremiah's solid application of preparation, daring, hard work, and luck.
3) You'd probably disagree, but I think you've hit such a critical mass of followers and fans who will do your marketing for you that you don't have to rely on such snake-oil-salesman tactics to deliver your content. I think you're already in that enviable position where your content's quality can sell itself.
4) I'm also kind of appalled by how dismissive a lot of your defenders are of your critics.
Nice post on how to think rich and grow rich..i am reading napoleans book now and well J's journey backs Napoleans theory.
But I need to be enlightened on one thing: I don't understand why guys pretend they are after look when it comes to choosing wives when they really aren't…at least the goodlooking ones I know never really look for a beautiful girl as a potential wife…
i give u some examples…
Once I was dumped for a girl whose body weighted two times as mine and her mind and heart weighted half as mine.
Another time the guy who dumped me just told me he is not looking for a barbie and flied all the way to australia to meet a girl who proceeded me and him in age and weight. Didn't have the chance to try her inteligence or intention but in photo, she sure looked anything but beautiful to me or to him.
And well, last (hopefully least) I received a call from an ex of mine who left me for someone he had met over the net saying how I had been the classiest most fragile and kindest woman he had ever met…how they all the time have fight …..but he also added he is very happy with his decision…
I am not holding anything against any of the ones who dumped me for less…but my experiences tell me we're fooling ourselves if we think we are after look or any tangible/measureable quality…
I still can't figure what that sticky thing is that brings two ppl together and closes their eyes to their flaws…i just know it is not the look..
Honestly….get over it.
I really liked this story and am surprised that so many assume that these women were taken advantage of. This is an insult to the all the women photographed as it assumes they didn't have the mental capacity to judge the offer and make the right decision for themselves. What do you think? "They are attractive girls from a third world country so they must be defenseless." If you think that, you are dead wrong. Consider that many of these women used the photos from these shoots to land other opportunities – this one point alone shows that they were business mind people capitalizing on one experience to gain another.
Another important point to consider is the fact that just because there is no monetary exchange doesn't mean there was no real consideration in this contract. In Tim's book he talks about exchanging English lessons in lieu of cash for something he wanted of value (sorry Tim I can't remember what you received for the English lessons off the top of my head). Before the modern monitary system services and good were traded, quality photography is a valued service just like modeling.
There are many other points but this controversy is being given way too much attention.
I wanted to say to Jeremiah: this story really touched me. I have been working through Tim's book to develop a financial muse (and am about 3-6 months away from hitting the goal) and lost momentum. The problem was not having a goal beyond the freedom and mobility of the financial muse itself, but this story and your picture made me dust off my camera (hadn't touched in in over a year) and get excited again.
You landscape pictures are amazing – I'm now working towards traveling and taking some pictures too.
I'm hoping to be as fortunate as you to bump into a worthy travel companion like you did.
P.S. Day is not only hot but really photogenic. Good luck to the both of you (you both look really happy) and to your new life together!
haha! The complaining women are jealous whether they admit their unconscious needs or not. Why else must someone accuse a happy man for enjoying marriage with an attractive wife?
If you're not a woman being your most attractive, other women are stealing guys from you.
Keep "offending" Tim. My liking for you is turning into an unusual and uncomfortable attraction.
Congratulations Jeremiah on living your dream! I hope that you do get the contest sponsored and running and when you do, I hope that you open the contest to female photographers, as well as male photographers. I would love to shoot models in Brazil!! Thanks for the inspiration as always Tim!
I'm a big big fan of Tim (blog & book), really inspiring work.
i'm definitely not a fan of this 'getting a perfectly shaped brazilian 'model' to marry you [via 'i'm a foreign 'photographer' with no references, please let me see how you look in a bikini first'] post. (no offense, jeremiah!)
next part ? how to marry a hot thai actress [via 'i'm a director without references nor budget but i'm trying to capture the beauty of thailand with my camera. would you like to take some semi-nude shots at the beach?']
it's a lame story.
nevertheless (&sure thing): i wish jeremiah & his wife all the best.
What a great story! You've helped many girls get the jobs and careers they were after and you got what you were after. Win-Win for everyone! You make a great couple!
I showed this post to my wife and she said 'your never going to brazil !'
Americans are one of the few cultures who marry for Love most cultures marry for power, or money.
This only works as long as he does not bring her to the USA. Once she is here she will dump this guy in a second. Most of these chics only see you as their ticket out of poverty.
Best of luck.
My wife and I met In Calc 2 for science and math majors! Very Sexy! Whats' really sexy is that she took that class for fun and got an A without studying while I struggled! (The pleather pants she was wearing on our first day of class 13 years ago didn't hurt either.) Great story! Great shots.
When you redate blog posts, how do you get around the problem of links to those sites being broken? Both of our blogs include the date in our URL.Jeremiah,
To be mentored in photography would be a fantastic opportunity, you should definitely go ahead with the competition. -
I would like to take a moment and point something out that is troubling to me. I have seen several comments along the lines of "Not only are Brazilian woman more beautiful, but they don't fly off the handle the moment someone nears their oh-so-sensitive comfort zone."
Women, all over the world, are objectified. And saying that 'men are attracted to women and therefore it's natural and therefore anyone who objects is not living in reality' is just plain wrong.
My husband is a man who greatly enjoys the beauty of women. BUT. He has never made a woman feel uncomfortable or leered at her in public. (He's made an art of the casual glance and/or making a woman feel like a goddess, not an object. A huuuge difference.)
My female friends, many of whom he finds attractive, are comfortable in his presence. The difference is that he enjoys feminine beauty without feeling the need to force them to acknowledge it.
So many men leer/stare, grope, even follow women around in public, and generally feel entitled to approach any woman they find attractive. (ihollaback.org is an excellent website on this.) This isn't merely 'appreciating the aesthetics of feminine beauty' because otherwise one wouldn't feel the need for an approach regardless of a woman's body language.
When I was in middle school, I developed early and, while I am now proud of my physique, I was terrified of the men who constantly stared and followed me around. Because I was 'not feminine enough,' or 'hated beautiful women'? Obviously not.
But merely having boobs and being in public apparently gave these men carte blanche. Am I alone in this experience? Not by a long shot.
Am I saying men can never approach an attractive woman? Of course not! But the guys who are creeps and objectify women are the guys who pursue women without respect for her desires and will ignore her body language and physical signals of discomfort.
Hi Hayden,
I agree with all of this, but let's be fair: nothing in this piece indicates that Jeremiah ignored the models' physical signs of discomfort. Yes, men can do terrible things to women, but this doesn't put Jeremiah in that category IMHO.
Tim, this was in response to some of the comments, not the post.
The title is misleading and this post would have generated more positive reactions from females, because I only see one or two sentences that relate to the title in any way, and leave a number of ladies here flustered. If the title was something like "How I married an average looking daughter of a Mexican school director" doesn't sound as opulent or hormonally stimulating as "Brazilian models" when it's force-fed to men as an 'ideal' in mainstream erotic magazines, not that there's anything wrong with Brazilian models, or daughters of school directors are any less interesting, the truth of the matter is it's more about tits and ass then it is about finding spousal insight the majority can relate to, this article doesn't really assist single women, single men with preferential differences, or married couples looking for relationship insight (in the end it's more romantic and fascinating that two people can find each other in the world than people working for free). It would have been more relevant and potentially meaningful to hear how one values looks vs.brains, how foreign women can protect themselves from scams (a man can easily approach a woman lying on a beach in a foreign country, scam and force her into prostitution which happens every day in under-developed countries), where the balance lies in spousal equality from foreign and financial differences, would have been more interesting to read. I find it frightening that a woman can be so easily approached, and I (nor anyone) should be surprised if a handful of these 'inexperienced never been shot before girls' would walk away for the right amount of cash for porno filming, because again we are talking about an under-developed country (but we're not printing that story are we? just the blueprint!), with possible minors and no legitimate model release forms, or safe business practices mentioned in protection of both the model and photographer for a "How-to" guide. If this started with a different title like "How an average guy can become a swimsuit photographer" or "How Jeremiah attracted his ideal partner" or anything that doesn't generate red flags in every paragraph (not that I can get past the returning point) perhaps would have been more suitable?
I guess I have to do the Naked Girls of Brazil
Tim, Jeremiah – I'm totally with Elise on this one! I think it's an amazing story of someone who set out to follow a dream and find love! This post reminded me anything is possible. That, and the fact I want to start doing squats and lunges again ASAP
PS: As a magazine journalist I can tell you why there are women on the cover of women's magazines. It's because – wait for it – women like looking at other women… they just don't like admitting it so much! Food for thought.
No. Actually, that's completely false. The male gaze is the right term for that. It means that the anticipated audience, as well as the artist(s) behind the camera, are male. Lol sorry honey, but you need to do a little research before splaying your own beliefs onto others.
Uhm, no. It's because it creates insecurities, the very stuff that advertisers need!
Holy Brazil Batman! Just give me a minute while I pick my jaw up off the floor. I'm sure I've read before that Brazil has the highest percentage of gorgeous women per capita than anywhere else.
What an inspiring post! And for me it hits close to home:
Since I was a little girl I dreamt of being a writer (since these were daydreams, a world famous writer) and my favourite hobby was photography. A couple of years ago I decided to make myself a writer and turn photography into more than a hobby. Being self taught I always assumed I would not hold up to the 'pros' with their training. Really the only thing holding me back was me.
I am so happy to see someone that leapt in and made his dreams come true.
And just a note here about model shoots, it is actually quite common for both photographers starting out and models beginning their careers to shoot and be photographed for no payment. The best way to build a portfolio when no one knows you is to offer to trade services. I photographed women for no cost and they modelled for no fee. I took the photos for my portfolio and they for theirs. It is mutually beneficial.
Thanks for keeping my inbox interesting Tim and Jeremiah!
If that contest gets going count me in.
Alles liebe!
@Hayden Tompkins And what countries have you lived in?
You write about being looked at in middle school. What does that have to do with a guy photographing ADULT models?" So many men leer/stare, grope, even follow women around in public, and generally feel entitled to approach any woman they find attractive"
I feel entitled to approach women I find attractive. What am I supposed to do approach women I don't find attractive? You are in serious need of some help.
When did the photographer grope anyone? Why would you write that?
Do you know what women do? They make false claims against men. Innocuous claims at work like 'he stood too close to me'. That happened to a friend of mine and they fired him for 'sexual harassment' because they couldn't find 'standing too close' in the HR manual. LOL Geez now my friend, his wife and daughter had to move because of a woman making false claims. And he didn't do anything wrong- the woman was a psycho. How about that Hayden Tompkins? America sooo uptight.
When I lived in Brazil women followed ME around. How is that for ya!?
Thanks for letting people know how uptight westernized people are.-
Oh my god I am going to be in trouble with the women. I wrote
"You write about being looked at in middle school. What does that have to do with a guy photographing ADULT models?"
I should have written "a guy photographing models who are adults" because I am sure if this were an article you would read into it that 'adult models' is like adult movies as in X rated or something. oh just go away you whiners. -
If you had read the comment, you would see that I was not referring to the post at all.
"If I had read the comment"? That's unnecessarily rude and presumptuous. I did read the comment, but perhaps I misread it. Considering a friend's father was diagnosed with cancer just before I got into the comments, I wouldn't be surprised.
Hello Tim and the world,
I'd like to take a moment to thank Tim for this inspiring post – the make the darn first step to follow your dreams part and the pics too (OFC!).
What I really-really-REALLY!! enjoyed about this post is the fact that Tim had to ditch the push-up bras and came up with some cool and interesting post title but not the OMG! I HAFTA READ THIS!-style of doing it.
Tim don't get me wrong your post are very, and I mean veery!, interesting. You don't need this PPC-esque style of posting bro! We don't like to have our expectations let down and I'm sure that's the same for you.
We love you man, we love what you do, we love the way you do it and we love the fact that you help us realize that everything can be done, everyone of our dreams can be reached. We thank you for sharing everything with us and I'm certain you can feel it too.
Keep up the good work! We're here for you
I am not usually commenting on blogs, but since you took so much heat for this post i just want to say that i considered it very good and inspirational, a pleasure reading it. Much more interesting than other posts.
I came back for a second visit and noticed a less compelling title….
Great post Tim!!
Something I would pursue if only I could take photographs haha.
Keep up the good work!
I love this post. You have inspired me over and over again. A close friend sent me this with the header "Lets move to Buenos Aires". Honestly I have been considering this place as one of most likely places to live. Now you have definitely sold the final aspects of why one single man should live here. After exploring much of that world South America feels like the next likely destination.
Thank you for being an inspiration for change!
In answer to Tim's question about whether you can engineer meeting your husband or wife, I answer yes, because that's exactly what I did.
I decided to come up with a new kind of dating philosophy in order to become more pragmatic and structured about meeting people. The idea was to spend more time on dates and less time chickening out of talking to girls. It worked. A year after I married my wife I read Tim's book, got inspired, and created a dating guide which has become my muse. It's called The Go-Getter's Guide To Finding Your Soulmate and it's a dating guide for the romantic, pragmatic and determined. So I engineered meeting my soulmate… and I'm slowly but surely engineering my financial independence.
Know what you want, and go get it!
Great story about how you can accomplish some wild idea by just going for it. By your plane ticket and worry about the rest later.
It seems like many readers have inserted HUGE negative assumptions into both Jeremiah's story and Tim's decision to write this post, and as a result both Jeremiah and Tim have received some very unfair criticism here. Melodramatic statements implying that a man who desires female beauty is one step away from becoming a rapist are inappropriate and insulting to both sexes. In your future conversations, please make sure that your passion is directed in a constructive, and accurate, manner.
It is an inherent and irreversible trait of human beings to be attracted to physically fit individuals. (No one is implying that physical appearance is the ONLY component of attraction…do we really need to state this caveat every time)? If you were given a choice between your partner being physically fit or not, which version would you choose? (Some may argue that they would "love" their partner the same, but I'm not implying that you would love your partner any more or less…only that you would PREFER the physically fit version). I don't believe that anyone can honestly answer otherwise (even if we can't make you admit it out loud). You would prefer a physically fit version and…here's the kicker…there is nothing wrong with that!!
Tim, this post was a perfect example of taking your own advice not to try to please everyone with every blog post. I loved everything about this post: Jeremiah's inspiring story on his professional success, Jeremiah's inspiring story of his personal life, the photos and yes, even the original title!! If I can't have Tim Ferriss's life I'd love to have Jeremiah's!!
I am stating the obvious to say that most people would prefer to have a partner with a Brazilian-bikini-model level of fitness and attractiveness. I am also stating the obvious to say that most people won't get a partner like that…most women don't possess that trait, and neither do most men. What I find intriguing is that we don't see men being angered by this reality. Many women seem angered by the fact that men still prefer beautiful women. It's no secret that the components of attraction are more equally weighted with women, but it seems like there is a lot of animosity from women over the fact that men don't weight the components of the attraction in the same proportions that women do.
I wonder if the root source of this controversy comes from American society's increasing insistence that there are no inherent differences in men and women which go beyond whether or not your parents gave you dolls vs trucks as a kid. Societal expectations have changed in America over the last couple decades as American society has pushed hard for the feminization of men…and has gotten it in large measure. I think it was expected that if you could get men to outwardly act like women that all our differences would go away.
I don't like to look at beautiful calendar girls because I like to look at them – I like it too much. Too much, I like it. And it's not good for me.
If you want to marry someone amazing, don't try too hard. Don't make lists. Don't calculate. Don't analyze your way into nuptial bliss. My wife is nothing like the girl of my dreams. Nothing like the girl I was searching for. And I am glad. No matter how good you think your dreams are or how complete your list of desired attributes, there are things you haven't thought of.
I could not have dreamed up my wife all by myself in a million years. But she came along, both more amazing (and more difficult) than my dreams.
One last thought: for true romance, there's nothing like following tradition – I mean old traditions, like waiting till your wedding night and serenading her from beneath her window. (I did this, singing in Italian, and then her mother applauded.)
@Jason Murphy You noticed the change in title huh? Just wait until Tim takes out the photos too. He is being cowed by just a few women reading things into the story that are not there. Some woman called his friend a 'creep' but provide no quote to prove this. I would not let them call MY friend a 'creep'.
@ Tim Why did you not take your own advice written above? I don't get it. Seriously I don't. You changed the title after some overreactors and liars complained and said they were leaving anyway. So who cares? Why did you change the title?
"Blog Lesson 1 – Please Everyone to Interest No One
If this post put your knickers in a twist, before leaving a snarky comment, realize this: when everyone is your customer, no one is your customer. This is true in business and writing."
Hi John,
I actually changed it after speaking with Jeremiah. He felt, and I think he was right, that there wasn't enough how-to about marriage specifically to warrant the title. I don't think it's good to attempt to please everyone, but it's no sin to change course. I do this quite a lot, especially with content. Offensive is fine, if the how-to is strong, but I don't want the title to be misleading and lead to disappointed readers.
Hope that helps,
After reading the comments on this post, I feel inspired to follow your advice under "How Does A Bestseller Happen?" and write a book about the "protest culture" that is spreading across our society. Every day I am more and more amazed by the fact that we now have more ways to access information than ever before, but we seem to know less and less about what's really going on.
All of the people who criticized this post make valid arguments about the fact that men CAN potentially abuse and objectify women, a point that I nor anyone else can argue against, yet none of them seem to have read the actual story and acknowledged that Jeremiah is not an abuser and never hurt or took advantage of anyone. One may argue that he took advantage by not paying some girls initially, but he clearly states that it was an honest mistake that he corrected AND any model who thought they were getting a bad deal could have just said "No" and moved on. He wasn't forcing girls to take their clothes off and pose, they willingly volunteered. If anything, the complainers are doing much worse because they create this story where South American women are not very smart and are immediately hypnotized by any white man who claims to be a photographer. As noted by you and others, this is total BS. Undermining the intelligence of attractive women is its own form of objectification.
This is how protest culture works! They find a story, only pay attention to the details that fit their worldview of "Someone is taking advantage of someone else," and ignore (or even worse, distort) important facts to the contrary. This used to only be the territory of fanatical religious groups, but since the rise of political correctness and 24-hour news networks, misrepresentation has become shockingly commonplace. Normally intelligent people, such as the type I would expect to read this blog, begin foaming at the mouth at the chance to complain about how "offended" they are at something they never bothered to fully comprehend. Hell, you could say I'm doing the exact same thing right now by reacting to the reactors
By the way, to re-re-reclarify my stance, I am not saying that women are never taken advantage of, bad things do happen to good people almost every day. My question is, since the facts maintain that neither Tim nor Jeremiah are raging misogynists, what is the benefit of protesting them? No one is being reformed here because there is nothing to reform, and while date-rapists worldwide continue to do horrible things to undeserving women, we're all wasting time being pissed off at the good guys.
On a lighter note, if you're interested, here is a video of the film director Kevin Smith telling the story of how he attended a protest of one of his own movies, Dogma, in 1999.
The movie was a comedic take on various Catholic precepts that was actually surprisingly pro-Catholic, but the protesters never knew that because not one of them ever saw the film. I guess it's a lot easier to be pissed off about something if you just make up the ways that it offends you.
- Pat-
That sounds like a best seller. Make it happen, may the force be with you. I can't wait to read it.
Crowd of mindless protesters –
Thank you for the entertainment. That's what you wanted right? Argumentative attention is better than no attention at all.
I have been happily married to a Brazilian girl for four years. I met her in Massachusetts and started to teach her English. It is easily engineered. Just like Jeremiah teaching poses and helping these beautiful girls, you will wind up with one to marry. The brazilian girls love Americans. I have a friend in Florianopolis so I am planning to spend a few days in Florianopolis for my next trip to Brazil so maybe I will meet Jeremiah and Hans. My wife is studying photography also so maybe she can get some lessons from Jeremiah.
I work as an aspiring fashion photographer. Lots of these comments are being made so far from people who don't actually know how the industry works! Saying "she's being taken advantage of" is such a huge disrespect.
Here's a link that might "enlighten" the haters:
http://dp.lexar.com/phro-photo/how-did-they/getting-started-high-fashion-photographyPhotographers and models both start out working on developing a portfolio, FOR FREE! Expect this to happen for a number of years until you develop the skills/relationships with the right people to further your career! Both parties win.
Thought I would put an end to this nonsense.
Great post Tim!
Tim and Jeremiah, I am currently moving to Brasil. I lived in Costa Mesa, CA for the last few years and worked at a job that I felt was suppressing my soul. A few years ago I read your book, The 4 Hour Work Week and was inspired, to say the least. I quit my job, sold my furniture, stored my car, and headed south with a backpack. I'm currently in Mexico and will be going through all of Central America, Venezuela, and entering Brasil from the north towards Florianopolis where I will reside. I've been to the southern part of Brasil and fell in love with every aspect of the culture, women, and climate… especially in Florianopolis. My intention is to take a Portuguese course to become as fluent as possible while down there and teach English privately. I'm open to other entrepreneurial projects as well.
The story of how I met my wife also has to do with the lure of the exotic. In 2000 I quit my boring, safe, lucrative job and moved to Venezuela to teach English & learn Spanish. The students were very pretty and the streets of Caracas were full of beautiful women. Within the first 2 months I met Francia at a ska concert in an infamous bohemian bar of Caracas. We dated for a couple of months and then she dumped me. I met a few great girls there, but Francia was always my favorite. We stayed friends and she basically tortured me with the "let's just be friends" scam.
I stayed there 2.5 years and then moved out to Maui. Over the years Francia & I stayed in touch here and there by email. She moved to France and then Brazil. Facebook came out and that got us more in touch. Then, in Aug 2008 I traded apartments with a friend from NYC. I asked Francia if she wanted to meet me there. She came up, and we rekindled the flame. We spent 2 weeks together there and decided to get married. 2 months later we eloped on a beach in Margarita Island. Now it is 2 years later, and married life in Miami Beach couldn't be better. -
Hi Tim,
Here are my 2 cent for the title (yup! the topic is on :D): How to live your dream and marry a Brazilian model while you're at it! Hope you like it and use it.
PS: Browsing through Jeremiah's flicks I found this AMAZING lady that I think deserves to have a picture in this post (again my 2 cents and personal favorite, you don't have to please me) and I'm talking about (ta-daa!) The Wonderful Amazing Sweet Angelic H.O.T. Larger than Life Michelle (*fluffy hearts floating around me as I type her name*).
Set up that contest and I will be in Brazil in a heartbeat. I've always been into photography, but Brazilian girls just would take it to a whole new level. Great post and amazing photos Jeremiah!
Pictures like these are what motivate me to get my ass to CrossFit at 5am. :p Being of Brasilian heritage, I am determined to rock a bikini like that.
Well, i'm a girl and I liked this post well enough.
Some of the comments though…
I wish I could get photographers to come up offering to take my photo for free. No one here has heard of trade for print?
Why would you shame girls who take pride in how they look? I know that I am a sexual creature and I feel there should be nothing wrong with showing that side off, AND that it doesn't mean that I am incapable of anything else. I really think that most guys realize that, the rest are just sad exceptions who probably suffer from some ill-brought up childhood.There's nothing wrong with being a guy and wanting to take professional photos of beautiful women, as long as he is respectful about it, which the photographer here seemed to be (minus the house visit, but i've never been to Brazil, this could be a cultural difference)
And yes, I find the accusations of these women being "victims" insulting. You're assuming that since they are from a "less fortunate country" they must be too stupid to avoid creepers.
If anything i'm enjoying how happy and natural they look (well, besides the pubic region, haha) as opposed to the over-photoshopped models that are more common in America.Now, coming from and artist standpoint, I don't see much merit in taking photos of such already beautiful models and lighting, the work is pretty much done for you! I could do that with my point-and-shoot.
Though I do admire you for living your dream. -
Danielle, "Why would you shame girls who take pride in how they look?"
Have you heard of feminism? In college some women are "taught" to look
for something, anything that just might be against women. And you know if you are looking for something, often you can 'find' it. Camile Paglia a level headed feminist warned of this.
Or as I was thinking it could be some of these complainers are either very fearful -as the one who was looked at when she started developing, and also they could be just plain crazy!John
Tim, it wasn't broke. Don't Fix it.
I was invited by a friend to read your book and visit your blog.
I have to admit, I didn't expect to be dragged so deep into the Cave. ; )
I really enjoyed your philosophy about defying stereotypes and cultural reinforcements that rarely benefit those who desire to reinvent themselves and their lifestyles. Maybe selling sex is one of those things that you feel… just works. Like you said in 4HWW—don't fix it if it's not broken. Please, no disrespect to anyone reading this but advertisers have been selling fantasy by trying to boost the egos of men, mostly middle aged—nothing new here—for ages. However, you seemed more creative and on the outside of the status quo. I understand that men like beauty, my female friends, including myself, are very attracted to gorgeous young men as well. However, the 4HWW was different to me, it felt intelligent and all inclusive, not uncivilized. Can't argue with my feelings….right?Do you believe that all men are after cheap, easy prey? Reminder: "Question life's most basic assumptions." You're not selling biology here, you're selling culture. This male centered p.o.v. is ageless and steeped in culture. Biology is only part of our human story. The human story is a complicated and rich structure that would be best examined by the intellectually curious, not the selective ignorant. You appeared enlightened, outside of the cave in a sense. I'm not going to try to convince some men on this blog that I'm a perfect "10" and not some 800lb woman in need of a date. That would be pointless, because they will believe whatever they have to in order to reinforce their position, no matter how flawed or incomplete. Selective Ignorance. But that's to be expected from the average man; I'm writing this for you.
Tim, it wasn't broken!! There was nothing to fix. I know things are probably slowing down financially(a normal cycle) but it's not broke…yet. You don't have to hangout in the Cave to make a buck. I know you understand what I'm saying, so get back to the real stuff and your true audience, the audience you respect; you had them at "Hello"… ; )
The Cliff
Has anyone ever read the articles in popular women magazines? They are 10 times worse than anything in this article.
They go as far as to give advice on how and when to give sex to manipulate a man to desire a woman more. They give advice as far as whether to have separate or even secret bank accounts.
This article wasn't even about that. It had no implications of such matters.
It was about a man who took charge of his dream of photography, which happened to be in a warm weathered country, where women aren't as apprehensive about posing as they are in bikinis much of the time as it is a beach culture. The man made friends with some of the girls, dated others, and the story ended with him marrying the one who was his BEST friend. Notice Jeremiah never said anything about getting the best looking or richest girl! One would think after reading some of the comments that you endorsed a mail-order-bride service!
Some people are insecure and need to project that insecurity onto others and into matters where it doesn't fit.
Next time you post something like this, and I hope that you will, do yourself a favor and disable comments. It will save you a lot of headaches and those who like it will take from it. Those who didn't can suffer silently.
This is a blog. Be as honest and as candid as you want to be, Tim. I believe that its your ability/willingness to be honest and candid that has gotten you the following that you have. you can't please everybody, nor should you try to. So don't let people attempt to censor you or take heed to the threat to boycott your endeavors because you appreciated a story and decided to post it.
These are the kinds of situations that the 4Hour Work Week are supposed to help us avoid/overcome!
Hi Tim,
Will quitting smoking (nicotine addiction) be addressed in the book? I'm a half pack-a-day smoker willing to quit, possibly without resorting to Bupropion or another prescription drug. Also, I've tried patches and gum, without success.
If not, would you like a guinea pig for an experiment in quitting smoking :)?
I've just been sent to your site by a friend who has been following your progress and musing for a while now. I recently found myself in a similar situation to the majority of your readership when I realised I was stuck in a dead end job, completely wasted, that that the potential in my life had been spurned.
I set up Challenge Ten to try and motivate myself to get off my ass and make something out of my life. I have committed to losing 30kgs, going on blind dates, learning to cook, travelling the world, starting my savings and loads more, and have been blogging about my successes and the setbacks!
I can't wait to get stuck into 4HWW once I manage to get my hands on a copy. I'm heading off to my local bookshop now to do just that.
If I can achieve what I have achieved on my own, imagine what I can do with some expert help. I didn't realise this advice was available to me, but really looking forward to replicating Jeremiah's success and finding my own path in Life.
It is so absolutely ridiculous that you had to rename the title of this post to appease the overly sensitive imbeciles who felt offended at the notion of a North American traveling to South America to find a potential wife. It is certainly MUCH easier for North American men to meet more appealing females while in South America than in North America. There are a multitude of factors that contribute to this, not solely the economic incentive–but it's certainly a great motivator for many females while in places like Brazil.
Denying this fact is just plain stupid. No, Norte-Americanos aren't kings or anything special, but while traveling in Brazil/South America, we definitely have an "edge" on meeting women.
The truth, fortunate or not, hurts. Stop crying about it.
I noticed the change in title from wife-hunting to model photographer.
I am curious how do you assess the readers feedback and change. What was your decision making process. I am sure us, readers, want to see how your mind work. Was it a good decision to change the title?
Do you accept the reader's protest or stand by what you intended? Was it strategically to spark debate? Or was it a natural process and out of your goodness you made thing better?
I see fair balance of advocating the article's title while other opposed. Was it the reader's voice? or your authorized decision?
For context: I am a professional woman with two advanced degrees. I was married to an overweight man with a high school education, until he died. And when I was younger, I was good looking, not that I knew it.
And I say, some of the women commenters who have "gotten their knickers in a twist" need to get over themselves. Seriously.
Anyone who is surprised that men are interested in beautiful women cannot possibly be a member of the human race. You must be from an alien planet. And I'm not talking Venus, here. I'm talking another solar system. In another galaxy.
It makes you uncomfortable? Please. Tell me again how "uncomfortable" you are when your spouse/S.O. tells you that you are beautiful and sexy in that new dress you bought specifically to turn him on.
Any woman who doesn't know that some men (maybe most) consider looks first has been under a rock their entire lives. Any woman who doesn't recognize as a fact of life that men are only going to date, sleep with, and marry women that they find physically attractive may very well be mentally impaired. Certainly culturally retarded.
Please don't pretend that you don't know any women who are only interested in men with more education than them, more income than them, and (often) at least as much hair. I'm sure YOU aren't that shallow, but I personally went to college with women who were there only for their MRS degree, and it wasn't even a particularly good undergraduate school. Many women will not sleep with men who are overweight, so don't pretend that just because YOU don't have that prejudice (riiight), no women do.
Genetically, this DOES make sense. To sucessfully spread their genetic material before birth control (i.e., all of recorded time until fifty years ago), men only need to have sex with a number of fertile women (attractiveness in nature IS a proxy for likely fertility). Men don't have to care what their partners think or if they are smart. Just have a lot of sex, and therefore many babies. Some of those women will undoubtedly raise those children to the age of successful reproduction (attractiveness in nature is also a pretty fair proxy for survival over time). So, from a genetic survival perspective, men are different from women.
For a woman to spread genetic material, she has to raise at least one child to the age of successful reproduction. Pre-1980, lest we forget how recently women in the USA–not all countries YET–became able to protect themselves, this required a man who would protect her progeny and stick with her for at least a few years (the longer the better), and PROVIDE for her progeny (food, clothing, shelter) for which money, success, and education are all proxies today.
Maybe these women commenters are pissed off because they don't think men being attracted physically SHOULD be true. Or that women marrying for security is politically incorrect. Well, ladies, what you think should be and what IS are two different things.
Stop getting angry with Tim because he discusses the way the world IS, rather than how you think it should be (technically, of course, he just discussed how ONE MAN photographed beautiful women, NOT white slavery–you guys read WAY too much into one article, given that many women believe men can barely dress without some help).
At least, stop broadcasting your ignorance on the net. It's embarrassing.
I like your summation the most, cheezelouise! A tonic against the vitriol.
What a Great Story.. We are all 100% in control of what we do in life.. The Ups and the Downs.. It is very inspiring to see Case Studies.
Books with Case Studies always kick Ass… Also Hurry Up Tim I can't wait for your book!!!! Make sure it get to New Zealand.
Tim, I have to disagree with you. First though, I want to add that my english isnt great since I am not american/english, so please no picking on a single word from the haters on here.
Tim, you say (i suspect, due to an attempt of correctness) that there were valid arguments on both sides here, and I have to strongly disagree.
As a hobby (sided to my actual work as an entrepreneur) I work as a model for almost 10 years now, pretty successful on some covers etc, and I very clearly remember the "early days". In the early days, you are younger, maybe have no car, less money, and especially, are a little insecure, and after the shooting veeeeery curious about the pictures, and you dont understand how it really works. In reality, you are the MODEL. The photographer has a picture in mind, and you are ONE ingredient to it. To yourself, you are the main thing in the picture, but to the photographer youre just one ingredient. So whats gonna happen is, he will let you pose, eventually tell you how to, and take as many pictures as he needs until he reaches what he wants for a BASIC. But the picture isnt fnished then, later he will load it to his computer, then do the skin and shape correction, then the color correction etc, and THEN an image is done. Its very unlikely that you will see an image before that, I have experienced everything from waiting 2 days to 2 years before actually see the finals of the work I did. Sure sometimes you will be shown something on set, depending on how nice the guy is, but its not standard procedure.
So when Jeremiah takes the girls to his place to show them the pictures, thats a really nice thing to do of him. I have gone with photographers to their place or studio some times to watch the images, but guess what, I have never been automatically flown to their bed and got magically undressed. Why? I can tell you. Because its YOUR OWN CHOICE if you sleep with someone. That is reason 1 why I disagree with you saying there are valid arguments on the other side. Because in fact, by making such a big deal out of taking someone to your place, these people imply, that the model is not able to say not to a guy once they are at his place. Do you realize how immensely sexist THEIR actual argument is? Its ridiculous. The implied equalisation go to their place = have sex with them, is not only sexist, its in my opinion, stupid.
So their main argument isnt only sexist, but its also simply due to not having a clue about modeling work and the situation you are in when youre a newcomer model. So it is the old and typical situation, people critisise things they know nothing about. Thats not a very educated thing to do in my opinion.
The second reason I disagree Tim, is because the punch line of most critics is that the article is mysoginist. But in fact, it totally isnt. There is always the implication or even direct blame, that you reduce women to their bodies in this article, or Jeremiah does.
All the critics:
Can you PLEASE point out where that is happening? I dont find it!!??
What I do find, is that he speaks about his wife in a very respectful way and doesnt speak about her nice breasts as another critic mentioned, but actually speaks about how they felt "really connected right from the beginning" Pardon me, is my english worse than I thought and is feeling "really connected right from the beginning" now something physical that reduces women to that ? Caution, that was a rhetorical question, we all know it isnt, which proves that this argument of the other side isnt any valid either, its toally made up.
Another point the critics raise is that he was using those girls. And again I unfortunately have to realize, these are people criticising something they know nothing about. TFPs ( "Test For Print", shootings where neither the model nor the photographer get paid in the first place) are highly comon in the modeling world, and there are many different agreements on how the images are used and if money is made how its split etc. Doing free shots and TFPs are -the- way for newcomer models to polish up their sedcards (portfolios). Actually, even when I was photographed by world class photographers that earn more a day than what most ppl reading here will earn a year, the very best pictures ever shot of me were made by aspiring photographers on a TFP basis.
So, all arguments made by that other side are either invalid due to missing knowledge/competence or even highly sexist and insulting themselfs. Thats why, Tim, I have to disagree with your attempt to be correct. Thats also why I would like the critics, to re-think their arguments based on the information they are now given from inside the modeling industry and especially re-think, if what they though was written, was really written or if they just read what they wanted to read when they saw a title they didnt like.
I believe one of the best qualities in a person seeking success (which is why many ppl come read this blog I think) is to re-think what they did and also understand that nobody is perfect and sometimes we act too fast or dont think enough, but then its a good quality to be able to see that afterwards in a retrospective, and understand it, so you can do better next time.
Think about that, people
I read this post a few days ago and something niggled at me for a while after that I couldn't identify at first.
First let me say that I'm a 32 year old woman and I have no problem with the pictures – I think they look great and the girls look amazing. And Jeremiah and Dayana obviously had a happy ending out of it all.
But here's the thing: women are hyper sensitive about personal safety. This is a care that crosses all races and all borders because it's drilled into you as a kid that you have to not take lifts from strangers, always make a friend aware if you're going on a blind date, etc etc. I've done some pretty stupid things, including hitchhiking and going to very dodgy peoples' houses for parties.
But here's my niggling problem with this article: that a woman would be willing to hitchhike to a stranger's house at 5am in the hope that he might take some pictures of her, make her even a bit famous, get her out of the economic situation she's living in. I chose to be a numbskull and take risks, but would she have done that if she wasn't living in Brazil, if it wasn't a Western photographer?
Fact is, Jeremiah sounds like a good guy. But if he wasn't, at least one of those girls would have been in a very vulnerable position, and I think that sucks. What happens if some sleazebag (or complete nutjob) goes to Brazil spinning tales of modelling glory to women he meets on the beach?
To me, this side of the story is like ones I've heard about Western women going to Turkey or the Gambia to pick up young guys. Do the guys have a choice? Sure, if they want to spend their lives in poverty. There's a power aspect to this whole thing and that left a sour taste in my mouth.
You guys really think this is like interning?
When you intern (and seriously Tim, didn't you do some internships?), you're trading free labour for the benefit of an association with a known brand, and for the opportunity to learn skills you didn't previously have.
(Again, with a KNOWN brand.)
How is that what happened here?
While it's nice that some of the girls derived indirect benefits, this project was in no way designed to offer equal benefit to the models. If it had been, Charlie would have been upfront about being a beginning photographer. He could have, in addition, offered a contract where the girls would get paid if he made a profit on the project. (Hell, he could even have specified that the project had to make a profit above a certain level.)
There were many ways for Charlie not to be a skeeze about this, and he didn't make an effort to do any of them. I'm not impressed. And I'm not particularly impressed with you, Tim, for suggesting this as a viable, innovative way for dudes to spend their time. Manipulating ladies into posing in bikinis for you might get you some hurrahs on the internet, but it kind of makes you a jerk.
I very much enjoyed this post Tim.. as a young guy who has time to try the most ridiculous of ideas (one may say), I have found this article to inspire the next possible step of my relativity new blog which you can find clicking my name.
I'm glad I came across you in this months Wired Magazine and you prominently caught my attention on Ted as you have forwarded me to some great content which will hopefully fuel some of my creativity and productivity.
Thank you
Great! I love this quote:
Getting the girls to smile was easy: I would just say "mais sexo!" For two years I thought that phrase meant "sexier!" but I guess it really means "more sex!" So it usually made the girls laugh before going into an even sexier pose. That's how I discovered the girls' natural smile and how great it looked in the photos.
Some of the best advice in this post is implicit: Enjoy life, have a light tone, don't take yourself over-seriously, and just go for it in general.
As a woman, I'm not in the least bit surprised that the majority of women disagreeing with this post are women. In fact, I expected it.
To be completely frank, the reason why women are disagreeing is most likely not because of principle in not paying the girls or whatever (in all honesty), but because this post makes some women feel like they are not enough. It's a harsh world for many women in that (as you can see from the comments) many (not all) men are so big on this 'getting a model' thing.
The reality is that not all women can be models. With men congratulating this guy (Jeremiah I think) on marrying a Brazilian model, well, for some women, they will feel like if they are not a model and not a Brazilian, and not above-average attractive, then…..it makes them feel like crap.
Personally, I think the post adequately reflects the truth of how men are, and just basically how things are in the world. It reflects exactly ho the animal part of us works.
Men want to find the best genes. The best woman. As do women (wanting to find the best provider). And the majority of women are not above average good-looking (going by the bell-curve) – or at least do not consider themselves to be, and feel like they suffer through body-image issues, and issues of not being pretty enough.
It would have been nice to see the male commenters say 'hey Jeremiah, I'm glad you're happy and have found someone you love and who is right for you' – but it was mostly about congratulations on marrying a Brazilian model.
But hey, this post it's just the truth, and I guess I appreciate Tim for reflecting this truth – I know he means well, wants to deliver what he thinks will be great content, and that's all that matters.
Thanks, and congratulations on another great post, Tim.
As a Brazilian Photographer living in the USA found this post very interesting, like the fact that Jeremiah had two goals, was focused and went after it.
I don't see a problem at all with these girls working for free because the same EXACT thing is done here in the USA. American girls offer modeling services in exchange for the pictures, very common in the industry as both parties are in portfolio building phases, in fact modeling photography is expensive so many of the models are happy to have their photos taken to have access to the photos to add to their portfolio.
The girls were not being told one thing and offered another, see no problem there, they were not in any way shape or form taken advantage of.
Brazil does have many beautiful women, I don't like much the idea that people view Brazil as a let us go and find a woman place and not see its other beauties, was is shown is always violence and extremely sexy women and I think we have more to offer but it is what it is.
nonetheless interesting case
A fun article with some very interesting comments! Tim, you do an amazing job of eliciting reactions, making people think.
I moved to Prague, CZ from Las Vegas nearly 7 years ago. The attractive qualities (physical and otherwise) of Slavic women I'd met over the years were the main reason I decided to see what was going on in Central Europe.
Gender difference seems to be a non-issue here, as opposed to what seems most common with many vocal people from the US.
I prefer to think that males and females are very wonderfully different. Some individuals possess certain traits that make them good at cattle roping or painting or pole dancing – and gender can be a factor, depending on the person.
What bugs me is how some folks look at photographs of symmetrical, robust, seemingly healthy and happy human beings and react in such a negative manner.
Physical beauty is a STRENGTH some people happen to have! Why is ok to admire someone for their keen wit, chess savvy, or kindness to children and small animals – all traits the pretty swimsuit model might possess – but
it's a no-no to admire someone's physical hotness?Is it a response springing from unconscious jealousy? Ouch.
To sum up: all things being equal, vive la différence.
Tim, The Four Hour Body is kick-ass! I'm looking forward to using your recommendations to turn myself into a total sex object. -
As someone in the modeling industry, it's really easy to find girls to pose for free in exchange for photos. It's called "Time for Print" (TFP), but more established photographers will refer occasionally to it as "Testing." (Though testing could does mean more than just that.)
Part of the appeal of newer models is that they haven't learned "posing" yet, so they're more free form, and they're willing to listen to the photographer more. A more established model though will know their best poses, be able to style themselves properly, and will be more reliable than someone without any experience.
hehehe. now that the title has changed for this article, some of the comments seem out of context. maybe it was just the original title: "wife hunting: how to marry a brazilian model" that was really annoying to people. now the article kinda just makes sense.
Hi Tim,
I wanted to ask you if you can do a post on the possibility of fat distribution ex. these models are slim but still have normal breasts and derriere. Is this possible at all, like the Victoria's Secret Model ?(they don't seem surgically enhanced.)Thanks a bunch!
(Love your new book, 4 hour body!)
I'll see what I can find! I think athletic is the goal. The derriere is trained muscle with a nice thin layer of cushion. Brazilian women train their butts off, literally. It can be built!
You Tim are a good man. May you help Barbara and women of the world get such nice asses and chests.
I've never been able to follow an eating plan until following the $HB slow-carb diet. Put on two kilos of muscle in two weeks and I'm a tall "hard-gainer". Sure to update you with a success story later on.
Not much to say about this post that hasn't already been said… That (in the U.S. at least) model release forms would have been appropriate, that it's not uncommon for individuals who haven't become established as models to work for free, that it is challenging for a lot of women to gracefully accept/embrace being a sex object… whether due to insecurity and body issues or the opposite… afraid of the power inherent in being desired.
So rather than chime in on that further… I want to share a little feedback on a parallel topic raised here… That of there being a disconnect at times between what your core messages are and the marketing techniques you use to sell them. It's not my intent to force a conclusion – I obviously don't have access to your A/B testing data, understand your publicists/publishers expectations of you, nor do I know what your goals are in terms of attracting new followers vs. maintaining old ones – but I figure I'll at least share my individual perspective as best I understand it myself.
This is the first time in months I've been on your blog (or twitter feed for that matter). I came tonight to do a search for 'whey' because I'm performing a comparison between kefir and whey protein – trying to understand if I need any of the unique benefits that whey offers (I currently don't think I do, as neither recovery nor mass are concerns for me, and kefir tastes a lot better plus it's a whole food with probiotics). Anyway, I never made a conscious decision to stop being 'a follower'. I guess I simply lost interest over time – in large part due to what I described above as a 'disconnect'.
I've met you on multiple occasions, as you well know, and believe you to be a sincere person who truly wants to change the world for the better, while shaking things up and having some fun doing it. For the most part, that belief in and of itself makes me interested in what you have to say. However, I think you at times do yourself a disservice by short-selling your own sincerity. Case in point: The 15-Minute Orgasm Spiel. I didn't order your new book, and don't intend to. However, a friend of mine did, and I briefly read the chapters on injury rehab and female orgasm. The disconnect is especially evident in the way you marketed the orgasm bit (in a competitive, goal-oriented, pissing contest sort of way). Meanwhile, the actual chapter is sensitively aimed towards individuals who are barely out of the starting blocks in exploring their sexuality, and is decidedly non-goal oriented and nearly nurturing. In other words, the chapter was executed almost diametrically opposed to the way it was pitched.
New followers might not pick up on these sorts of things. But those of us who are already paying attention do. I'm sure you're constantly entertaining decisions on how to shape your future work, and I'm sure it's not easy managing all the different expectations and goals. I hope this tidbit helps your evaluation process as you move forward. And if nothing else, at least this well-meaning criticism will be countered by the fact that Christmas is your favorite time of year!
Quick follow-up thought:
Not sure if this level of controversy is inline with your marketing intent or not. Also unsure how much of a desire you have, if any, to grow your female audience into a larger, broad-spectrum one. If you do want to grow it, I suggest hiring one of your intelligent female friends as an advisor to run these things by before posting. There's no reason a topic like this can't be outsmarted and delivered in a way that is broadly appealing while still sufficiently provocative for the male contingent to thoroughly enjoy. A single editorial pass from the right person would probably do the trick.
Best of luck!
I almost feel ashamed for sounding off beat – but my question is rather practical. Jeremiah – can you tell us what camera and lenses you used ?
Just curious …
Thanks -
Tim, just a heads up — the Amazon link right after the NYT list cellphone pic is broken; the URL is repeated twice.
Hey Tim,
Thanks for taking care of that Books-A-Million/Living Social issue. Awesome! Got the book and fantastic so far! Have devoured the first 150 pages today alone. Obviously going back for a reread! In any case, was wondering if it was possible to exchange the book for a Kindle version (wow, it's quite a heavy book and huge to tote around with me). If not, cool, but figures it pays to ask. It would just make reading it a hell lot easier. Thanks in advance, Tan -
iIteresting post and comments. As an aspiring photographer I kinda know where he's coming from.
The attitude of the author is light and it appears as if he decided to do something and went and did it with a 'get up and go' attitude. I have no issue with the models not getting paid initially. I'm sure that many people if asked would pose for a photographer for free if his portfolio was strong.
If the girls wanted to be paid, all they had to do was ask. -
Contrary to popular to belief Brits are social, just not self-indulged like many Americans
I always had a feeling that there was more to life then the repetitive 9 to 5 and until I read your book I was stuck in that rut. Being at college and taking 6 classes while also working more hours than my father who owns his own business. I realized that I needed a change and set about searching for what I can do that would allow myself to get out of this rut.
I started asking all my older friends, colleagues and professors what they regretted most about college. They all said, almost eerily unanimously, "that I didn't study abroad". I took their advice and a few months later I was on a plane to London for the semester. I didn't enjoy the work experience I had there so I dropped it in the first week and spent a semester pub hopping and indulging with the locals. I made sure I didn't hold back in offending anyone and challenged myself to be myself. If I offended someone I tried to work my way back out of it and then establish a relationship. British people are notoriously "difficult" to reach but after reading your book I said I'll give it a shot. Sitting in a bar once I turned to a guy and said "Excuse me do you mind if I ask you a question?" He was a little unsure at first so I started asking him about something that was going on in the news (I believe it was the student protests in London) from there I got to talking about what he did and where I was from and before you knew it we were buying each other a couple John Smiths (best bitter beer in London!) and having a great conversation. Contrary to popular to belief Brits are social, just not self-indulged like many Americans.
Now I am determined not to get into another rut that I would have to utilize the NR model to prevent myself from working a 9 to 5. Thank you again for putting together the NR life-model. Now that I have had a taste of the unconventional lifestyle I refuse to go back.Maybe I will check out this Buenos Aires that you speak so highly of.
KVLP.S. Their best food in London is Pub food. The conversion rate is a killer but you can definitely find some great meals for 12 to 15 bucks (USD) . I would recommend checking out the areas outside of Inner city London. If you take a 5 minute tube ride outside the city you can find some real nice stuff near Hampstead Heath, and other non major tourist areas (http://www.amazon.com/Time-1000-Things-London-Guides/dp/1846700124) . Feel free to shoot me an email if you ever need a recommendation email@example.com
Wow these women are beautiful it's hard to believe he just found them randomly because most of them look like they could already be professionals.
I can see why I need to learn to use a camera now
This is an awesome post! I would definitely be in the 20% that really liked the ideas behind it. Granted the hot women did not hurt the article, but that was obviously not the main point of posting this. Instead, it was about going after your dreams.
Just a note on a correction you might want to make to the 4-Hour Body. In the chapter on Ultraendurance I:
"Had she not stopped, Brian estimated her truer finish time at 3:30, a 7:28.8 per mile pace."
To be accurate, a 3:30 marathon is about 8:00 pace.
Thx, Peter! On it…
ok so I bought the 4hour body. and I am dying to find any kind of actual forum that actually TALKS about the book. everything on this website is tied to every ADD thing you've done or thought about or the 4 hr work week book.
what I am interested in is connecting with other REAL people who are trying this diet/exercise program. I walked away with a lot of questions and a lot of frustrations because there is a) no designated area on your blog other than your promotional stuff about the book and b) you do realize that none of the links in the book work, right?
anyways, I've committed to this for 30 days but I gotta tell you, I am not impressed so far. I feel like I am flying blind. And I can't tell you how hard that is for someone who is trying to lose weight….I guess if my pants stop fitting, I can take that as a sign that I am doing something wrong.
Funny how the people supposedly speaking out for the women are usually the most insulting to them. They always seem to assume the women are stupid and cannot make decisions for themselves. They give them no credit or respect.
"I'd help the lucky winner of this contest along with each step. First, we'll recruit the girls and find the models he'll be shooting. Then I'll give him my camera equipment and teach him how to photograph the girls. The winner will be shooting the girls on his own, but I'll be around if he needs my help. And afterward, we'll celebrate the results "Brazilian style"!"
I'm sad that you chose to limit this to *he* and *him* as I'd love to be a Brazilian bikini photographer and I'm not of the male gender.
Total typo. This — if and when he does it — would not be limited to men!
Hey Tim,
This isn't just a general praise, there will be some valid questions at the end of this but I love your book. I read half of it Monday afternoon (first book in my life I that couldn't put down). I'm confident that this e-mail will be worth your time.
I've been trying the cold showers and it got me thinking is there a minimal effective temperature at which to take these showers? I would imagine from a thermodynamic perspective that water would only have to be marginally colder than body temperature to facilitate that response. Just curious if you have experimented with this yet.
I've been trying the diet and I'm always tempted to try unprocessed brown rice, corn tortillas, and corn in the raw in the diets, how do these hold up? I've also wondered how does mayonnaise hold up in the diet? I've found some good artichoke dips that mix really well with vegetables for snacks. Hot Sauces are my savior, you have got to try Marie Sharps hot sauce, best thing that has ever happened to me (referred to me by the owner of the hot sauce store at the farmers market in LA). Also, are there any dark beers that might be OK in the evenings? I have to say that when using your diet, I am not hungry after I eat!
I've looked at a lot of cinnamon supplements, most of which contain Cassia. How did you arrive at Cassia not being supportive at reducing your glycemic index?
Also wondering why Brazil nuts aren't included in the list of great potassium suppliers.
I look forward to my first binge tomorrow, but I'm curious to know what the greatest binge you've ever had was, while still remaining effective in the diet. I was a little disappointed when I saw that some of your binges were better than my diet on a good day before your diet (minus the croissants), but also relieved to see that eating horribly on one day was actually OK.
One interesting effect I didn't expect, is that for the FIRST time in my life I wake up early and refreshed. This might be due to the green tea extract I take in the evening but I purchased the mildly caffeinated brand. I have struggled with waking up in the morning for years, and have tried every alarm clock there is, including one that robbed me blind by donating money to a charity if I didn't get out of bed and deactivate it. I have undergone some personal research when it comes to the field of sleep and waking up. My greatest success was putting a heated mattress pad and full spectrum light on a timer, both would phase in in the morning based on 1.5 hour sleep intervals. It would be so bright and hot that I sleep wouldn't be an option waking up in a sweat. The best sollution I'm unhappy to say came from binge drinking, where I've read that you wake up with adrenaline once your blood sugar levels drop from the alcohol consumed the night before. Have you come across anything with a similar effect without disrupting the diets that might facilitate the same response?
Thank you so much even just for reading this. I'm sure a man of neuroscience knows that it's not all about statistics and that it sometimes only takes one person to change the paradigm of understanding. Take Care!
-Mike Podevin
Thanks, Mike! Brazil nuts are in the book, but overeating them can cause you to OD on selenium. The best solution for waking early that I've found is a timed light clock, or using melatonin the night before and then leaving the shades up.
Good luck!
Tim, I love the book and everything in it…I've read it cover to cover twice and a few chapters four or five times…
One question…I'm three weeks into the weight loss and not fairing well. the first week I lost three pounds and the subsequent weeks, zero. The only item that may be hurting me, help me here, is I have tbsp of half-in-half in my coffee in the morning, I know it's not cream…but is it possible that's holding me back? I'm also eating 30 grams of protein within 30 minutes of getting up too. What am I missing?
Keith, did you get your bodyfat and composition tested? It's HIGHLY likely that you're gaining muscle. The scale isn't enough to track progress!
I'll tell you why this post made me feel uneasy – it gives me this fear-based idea that if I'm not as beautiful (in an impossible to achieve airbrushed way) as bikini models then I'm unworthy of love. I also feel guilty having devoted so much of time to my hobbies and work then to striving to be as beautiful and perfect as possible.
I understand men are attracted mostly to a woman's looks but if I devoted most of my time to enhancing my appearance then I'd be a very shallow person. Yet, the guilty feelings stick, and it hurts.
I just got 4HB this week and I am thoroughly fascinated. It is a great piece of work. So far, I noticed one logical error that I wanted to point out. On page 23, the GA box values an hour on a Stairmaster at only 7 calories after subtracting the BMR of 100 cal/hour. The problem lies in the fact that the 107 calories on the Stairmaster only consider the amount of energy expended in moving a person up 27 flights of stairs. Your body still produces heat and uses energy to keep the vital organs functioning, so in actuality this person would have burned 207 calories in that hour (100 BMR plus 107 on the Stairmaster). By your logic, if an exercise only burned 70 calories in an hour, after subtracting the BMR, you would actually burn 30 more calories sitting on the couch. While the value of rigorous exercise is not nearly as effective at burning calories as one would like, it's not as bad as 7 calories per hour. Minimizing exercise in this way is not accurate and doesn't lend the level of credibility to your concept that I think they deserve.
Hey Tim,
I just have to chime in. These American women on here are just plain jealous!! Why? Because most of them let themselves go for there career, poor eating habits, or whatever other excuse they want to make up for there ever growing size(see 2/3 of the country severely overweight), and it is hypocritical, because most of them are extremely vain and superficial(see plastic surgery in U.S. highest in the world) and growing more so by the year(see astronomical under reported divorce rate), they have turned into such gold digging human beings, it is disgusting(consumerism run wild), they can never be satisfied….you get the picture. It is always something out there made me feel________fill in the blank, because they won't look in the mirror at how disgusting they have become inside and take full responsibility for it, they would rather get on a blog like this and bitch and complain, because it could never be them, right??. They get on here and rip on these beautiful girls, who are beautiful inside and out, which they would know if they ever got off there large assets and went to Brazil. So they have the typical American attitude that they are superior to the rest of the world and everyone needs there help while they waddle around pointing fingers. Lol! I know this because this post never ends, it keeps emailing me like no other. This must have really hit a nerve in these American women lol!!! I am a photographer and I will tell you when my Eastern European swimsuit calender comes out Tim. I laugh at these caddy girls whining that it makes them feel guilty or not good enough. That will always be their personal choice to feel however they choose too. Most live these fake, material, consumerist, pill popping lives that are a total joke, not to mention unrealistic, and that the rest of the world cares nothing about. They keep it a lot more real and closer to nature. Did I mention that we only have 1/3 of our population is thin, not to mention a very small number of those are actually pretty. So guys we have no choice but to spread our wings outside of the country. That's where the naturally thin girls are, because they aren't plowing down preservative packed artificial food products, which then is washed down with piles of fast foods and then they wonder why they have weight problems , divorce problems, gilt problems, pill problems etc.. Sweet! I was in chez Republic in November and there are NO FAT PEOPLE or FAT CARTS anywhere….This guy is a Rockstar who shot this calendar!! High five one thousand times!!!!!!!!
@Rossmore: And the top prize for dumbest comment possible goes to…
Really, this nicely sums up the dumb attitude of the many responses from people who clearly have no clue what they're talking about.
I applaud the many women who stood up to these bullies and spoke their mind about what was wrong with this post. It's about more than whatever the silly title was before. I've only seen this post with the modified title and I still find the content of the post disturbing. Why can't women (and a few enlightened/open-minded men) express dissenting views on this post without automatically being called ugly, fat, a "middle class American woman" (is this a new cowardly code for something?), bitter, etc? And the sad thing is, many of the responses from the women then came with qualifications about their education levels, attractiveness, etc., when none of these ignorant bozos had to justify themselves in any way.
There are so many (valid) issues this post automatically conjures up for many women that you (clearly) can't even begin to imagine. This could have been a good opportunity for an open and thoughtful discussion, but many of you have shown you don't think women are "intelligent enough" to comprehend issues they are more intimately knowledgeable about. To relegate any dissent to simple personal insecurity about "not feeling attractive enough" or "feminist brainwashing" is really lazy. What are you so afraid of that you can't listen for one second to the concerns of the gender most directly affected by this? Now I wonder who the really insecure one is…
Easy, easy…
Hey Ali,
I want to thank you for your dedicated comment:)! You're definitely entitled to your opinion….I stand by my comment. It out is of control here in the U.S. with marriage and women. It is pure business lol! We are all to blame on some level for the monster we created. I wish you only goodness…Peace
@Ali…I want to thank you for your dedicated comment:)! You're definitely entitled to your opinion….I stand by my comment. It out is of control here in the U.S. with marriage and women. It is pure business lol! We are all to blame on some level for the monster we created. I wish you only goodness…Peace
Awesome and inspiring! Thanks for taking the time, can't w8 for the competition!
Hi Tim,
Indeed an excellent blog right there for aspiring models and photographers like me.This is an inspiration to anyone who would want to start out a profitable and challenging career in the future.Jeremiah Thompson and his wife is a great combination.
I believe Modelling and Photography goes together.A Model can develop its talent and skills in Photography if his/her interest is there, or even it goes the other way around .
Modelling came into a realization for me few years back. Just like those Brazillian girls. I was discovered by a Photographer and owner of a Photo Studio.I was in High School back then. There it started my Modelling career locally until 2008. I was an Image Model and Ramp by few companies, designers and Botique owners in my country. Through time, my exposure in media, pageants & fashion increment my confidence. It has been inate in my whole persona since then .
Brazillian Women are beautiful and I do hope Mr. J. Thompson would explore other beauties as well in other countries most specially in Asia.
More Success to your company Tim. Your Blog Site is very Informative, Educational and Inspiring.Cheers!
I sincerely plan on visiting Brazil sometime between June and Sept. I"m very computer literate and can't seem to find any contact information on Greicy of Mocambique or Mahara of Campeche.
I'm 6'3″ 220 lbs, caramel, funny, and very athletic, and indeed as fine and handsome as they come. I'm often described as a romantic r & b jazzy type with a touch of hip hop in my swagger.
I'm very financially established and looking for a young beautiful woman as Greicy or Mahara to spend the rest of my life with.
Help me out if you can. Surely it would be appreciated! I have my personal reasons for not posting myself fully on Facebook, but I can break it down to both or either of the young ladies once we share and discreetly exchange some things.
Somebody holla at me. I'm gone be where I'm at.
A lot of people have figured out in recent years that you can go to a less developed country and date better quality women. No big news here. The thing these people often don't focus on is preparing themselves to be a decent partner.
A success story, great news! I'm getting your book tomorrow Tim.
I don't get the negative jazz. Life is short, be happy! -
These models are so gorgeous, I still check em out once in a while
Wow, great idea for the calendar and the way to get beautiful women to pose for you.
Do you think I can make a calendar of the Beautiful women of Montana and get it to work as well?
Hey Tim!
Great post, and I read it at the right moment.
I am working on moving to Brazil, to reboot my life.
I started considering it a year and a half ago, and finally got to the point of getting serious!
Your book gave me a lot of practical advice and inspiration!
I really hope, I can contribute to spread your insight.
What would you say, if your blog would be translated into some other languages?
Just to help all those who don't have a good command of english? (I'd be honored to participate in such a project)
Does it sound reasonable?Best
Andras -
I have always love photography. I wanna do fashion shoots and get creative with models.
Thanks Tim for this post, it fueled my passion for photography. I hope someday i'll be able to do it and share it to the world.
This is a great story. I love how Jeremiah took his passion for learning how to surf and his hobby as a photographer and essentially created a new chapter in his life.
I liked this article very much and, unlike some american women, this hasn't offended me, instead it made me very happy! It was like a kind of personal justice to me because I also was born in the State of Santa Catarina just like those gourgeous girls on those pictures. I remember one night at a bar one man speaking out loud that there were only ugly women in Santa Catarina. His comments offended me because I'm from Santa Catarina! And I am not ugly I know that! His lack of respect let me upset. And then I finally see my vengeance day has come! This american photographer is showing the world how beautiful the catarinense women are! And I like when someone tells me how beautiful I am, I don't feel myself down, I feel myself flattered indeed! But I must say it's been very hard to find flirtatious guys… I don't like to be compared when I'm approached.
There were no victims there and then! And brazilian women are correct and they have morals and ethic, they are not whores! -
i am a commercial photographer in India, rather more like a cook in mc donalds, i shoot the same kinda of stuff everyday, 26 days a month, money is good, but after reading this article, and going through images of Jeremiah Thompson, inspirational work, and for a photographer like me, something very new.
its more like a breeze of fresh air…..probably i need to find my way to brazil….. -
Brazil, here i come!
I made a comment over a year ago on this post, and have made a shift since then. So I thought I'd share it with you.
If you read my comment (just do a ctrl-F and search for "Cassandra" if you like) – you'll read that I was feeling guilty about not devoting more time to my looks and concentrating more on my hobbies and adventures, etc.
I no longer believe that beauty is something to "work" on. It can come naturally with the right frame of mind wherever you live in the world.
What I've come to learn in the last year is that, here in North America, we live in a very commodified culture that emphasizes earning money to buy things that are supposed to make us happy, etc. etc. etc.! …and as a result the advertising, media and whatever else have filled our brains with negative thinking and memes that give us stress and affect our thinking.
Candace Pert says that "your body is your subconscious mind". This is what I learned in the last year. If you think ugly thoughts, feel ugly, and are negative, then you will look ugly.
That picture of Dayana made me smile. She looks so very much in love! I think that if we focus on beautiful things like this we can feel more beautiful and therefore look more beautiful.
One perhaps need not travel thousands of miles to Brazil to feel paradise. Yes, these warm countries are wonderful (I lived in Greece for six years) but there's a lot of positivity to be found here as well. Perhaps by embracing beauty (and allowing it) you too will meet your Dayana on the way to the grocery store tomorrow. I am almost sure of it.
Best of luck to everyone
On the subject of mini retirements, I've been a little late on the Ferriss train, but have been getting great results with the methods found in the book and shared by the extended family here. I'm working less at the jobs I don't enjoy and spend more time doing what I love.
My question is about having newly freed time. I'm not sure if anyone else has experienced this, but I've arranged to only have to work a few hours a day. The rest of my time I try to fill with interesting hobbies.
What do you do about your friends? I'm the only one of my social circle and family that has made efforts of lifestyle design, so now I'm always free when they're not. This might be one of the best problems I've ever had. I understand it's like someone complaining that they're sleeping with too many supermodels, but I was just wondering if anyone else has experienced this.
Thanks to Tim and the 4 hour peeps for the constant quality of blogs and comments. -
Great example of going beyond the existing paradigm, the supposed "rules" about what's ok or what is believed to work. If I hadn't already met the woman of my dreams I would most certainly consider this approach (I know how the story ends – read the original email ages ago
Wow there has been a lot of controversy over this post.
I believe that many of the women feel this is creepy because PUA's do use this tactic in North America to try and have sex with women.
When I still lived in Edmonton (Alberta, Canada) I was out at a friend's birthday party at a club called Vinyl. Near the end of the night a fairly intoxicated man approached me and said something to the effect of: "Hi, I couldn't help but notice that you are very beautiful. I am a photographer and was wondering if you would like to pose for me?" I am not a model and had never been approached like this before. My reaction was to say no that I was not interested. He persisted so for interests sake (and also to be slightly rude and perhaps prove what I already was thinking – creep alert!) I asked him why he was trolling the bar for potential models at this hour and what kind of photos he was taking. He replied "lingerie photos, I am working on a calendar."
He did not answer as to why he was looking at a bar at closing time (when people usually look their worst) for his candidates.
I can only say – CREEPY!That said: Legitimate models ARE discovered in diners, on beaches and at shopping malls. The difference is that the photographer is not drunk or trying to sleep with a woman/man.
You can find people willing to model for you for a variety of things (for FREE) without taking advantage of them or using them.For my final runway show at Fashion Design College this is exactly what my friends and I did – approach people on the street. Cariwest (A festival) was happening in Edmonton at the time and three of us went out on the streets with our phones and contact numbers in hand and approached any girl we saw that we thought would work for our show. We then invited them to our model casting, took their phone numbers and gave ours (if they were willing).
If you are professional and act professional people want to participate. Any aspiring model/actress/designer/artist knows that there is a give/take relationship in the creative world.*I do agree with Jeremiah though that the part about seeing them in their bikinis before the shoot could have been left out as it seemed to offend a lot of people. In a teeny bit of defense for Jeremiah: Before our show (at the casting) all of the models had to try on outfits for the runway show. We did this at our school so perhaps what made it creepy was that he said his house instead of his studio?
Either way I don't think (I hope) the post wasn't meant to encourage men to go and pursue women by lying to them nor that it was meant to objectify women. I think it was meant as a study of how one person took an idea and turned it into a business and a lifestyle.
To answer your question: I met my husband in high school and my mother and father instilled in me from a young age that you should chose a life partner very carefully based on a set of predetermined criteria, not based on whim or infatuation.
When I began dating my husband they sat me down and asked me really important questions about him, the most important of which (in my mind) was this: "Think of the most annoying thing that he does. Can you live with that for the next 70 years?"
They knew that you should marry someone for who they are. Not who you hope they will become.
I think that if more people would approach their search for a life partner in this way the divorce rate would be much lower.
We have been together now for close to 12 years, married for almost 7.
My sister also followed this advice and has been married to her husband for close to 5 years.I did not intend for my comment to be so long! thanks Tim for opening both of these discussions.
What I love about this post is that this guy had a dream, and he went after it. You have to be a hustler to have that kind of drive, and it's admirable, whether he was photographing beautiful women or starting an orphanage in Africa. Neither one is "better", and we're not here to place judgements on other people's dreams. He saw something he wanted and he went after it – good for him.
I read 4HWW under protest in June 2008. Based in London and was running a one day course in Perth Australia, I was staying with the guy who organised the course, he gave me the book to keep and read; I passed it back to him and told him I have been reading self-help books for 25 years and I had not read anyrhing in the last 15 that taught me anyrhing I had not already learnt in the first ten.
He insisted, and I read it on the plane back to London.
In eight months I went from 50 to 20 hours work per week without dropping a penny in income.
The timing was right: my wife (Paris)was recovering from cancer treatment which was going to get her one day- she was a strong girl so we hoped not for some time and I wanted to free up the time to spend with her doing stuff.
I always had a plan to reduce working hours every decade from when I was 20 (100 hours a week) but at the age of 49 was wondering how to get it down from 50 hours;
And I always from the age of twenty aspired to the concept of mini-retirements but never found or learnt the tools to permanently achieve other than on a sporadic basis.
I will cover the business side on another comment, but on the personal front my wife's demise was quicker than expected; in March 2009 the cancer had gone to the brain and after nursing her for a year she passed away peacefully bathed in love with very little pain.
I have absolutely no doubt that the intervention of reading this book allowed me to free up my time without financial distress to take care of her 24 hours a day: I now know I would have done it anyway but without reading the book, severe financial distress would have ensued.
Now because of my 4HWW model for work, I take the time out with my now13 year old son to have extended holidays; in the summer of 2010 after his mum passed away we spent eight weeks travelling Cornwall, Devon, Portsmouth, Isle of Wight, Wales, Shropshire and Norfolk.
He feels better loved for me having read the 4HWW.
What an amazing story… well from a guys perspective. Tim everyday i read one of these mini retirements and everyday i get more and more excited to start my own… cannot wiat to share mine
Thanks for sharing your info. I really appreciate your efforts and I am waiting for your further write ups thank you once again.
great inspiration.
I live in Thailand, many pretty girls here.
Calendar with cute Thai Girls, wow, I'll do that.
Thank you guys.