text:
Categories > Original > Humor
The Dynamic Fools
1 ReviewsHoly Hilarity Batman! That's exactly what happens when Stan and Roger obtain a flying potion from the CIA. Please R&R.
Fanfic Title:
The Dynamic Fools
Opening Credits Scene
Roger's Disguise: Ricky Spanish
Scene 1:
At the CIA Headquarters in Langley Falls on a cool spring Thursday afternoon,Reginald enters the room and has an announcement, Stan and his CIA buddies are listening.
Reginald: I have some mighty fine ass great news for y'all!
Dick: We already know!
Jackson: 30 Rock is in it's final season!
Stan: Uh, I don't think that's what he means, and by the way, that _is_ great news!
Reginald: Our scientist honkies invented some super fly potion!
Bullock (walks into confrence room): You may go now, Reginald.
Reginald: Need to go to my probation officer anyway, got caught with a hooker and some coke! Just like Marion Barry!
Bullock (holding a beaker): Behold! What Reginald meant by 'super fly' is we invented a potion that can make you fly, literaly!
Dick: Wow! That's amazing!
Jackson: What are we supposed to do with it?
Stan: Good thing Iraq didn't think to make that, or else we'd be getting suicide bombed!
Everyone laughs.
Bullock: Brilliant deduction, Smith. Indeed they would. (hands everyone a small beaker of potion) I'm giving this potion to each of you. Now, remember, use this wisely!
Stan: Can we use this on a mission, like in case we get stranded?
Bullock: No, because if anyone else found out, they would definately want in on it.
Dick: Like those 'stay awake' pills Stan and I used to take.
Bullock: Exactly.
Scene 2:
Later that day, as Stan was driving home from work in his SUV, he couldn't help but be curious about the flying potion.
Stan: Does this stuff _really_ make you fly?
Bullock's voice (echoing): Use this wisely.......wisely......wisely.......
The SUV stops at a vacant location and Stan gets out. He drinks a little bit and starts to levitate.
Song: Sonic Youth's Sacred Trickster plays.
Stan (flying): Oh, my gosh! It's true! We Americans did it again! This'll come in handy if we ever have to go to Benghazi!
As Stan was flying loop the loops in the sky, he sees a old decrepit billboard for the TV Show, 'The Greatest American Hero' and stops to look at it.
Stan: Ha! In your face, William Katt! And shame on you for having the same last name as the guy who shot the greatest President ever! (flips off billboard and flies away). I'm a better flyer than that asshole! That show sucked! B.J. and The Bear was a better show!
Then Stan was done flying and drove back in his SUV.
Stan: Woooo! That was a wild ride! I was like Rocky the Flying Squirrel! But much more cooler!
From a distance, Stan was unaware that Roger and Klaus were watching him from home with binoculars.
Song Ends.
Scene 3:
That evening, Stan was a little late for dinner and Francine was asking him about it.
Francine: Why are you late for dinner? You know how insecure I get when you come home late!
Stan: Bullock was riding my ass today. Had a lot of paperwork to do.....
Francine: You're not secretly eating out agin, are you?
Stan: Wouldn't dream of it. Besides, we had those alligators in that pit banished to the Everglades, remember?
Then they are both interrupted by the sound of video game gunshots and explosions.
Stan: Is Steve playing Call of Duty again?
Francine: No, that's Roger and Klaus. They're playing an XBOX game they invented where you shoot commercial mascots. They made the game after they saw The Dictator.
Stan goes in and sees and game Roger and Klaus are playing.
Roger: This is the best game we ever made! Which mascots should we shoot? Male or Female?
Klaus: Well, we already did the Male ones.
Roger: Let's do the Female ones.
Then Klaus picks on the menu list on the game that says, "FEMALE". Then the game shows a door open and it's Flo from the Progressive commercials.
Flo (in the game): May I help you?
Roger (shoots Flo): Blow it out your ass, bitch! You have the same name as a period!
Flo was bloody and dead on the game. Then the British girl from the Orbit Gum commercials comes.
British Girl (in the game): Dirty Mouth? Then clean it up.....
On the game, Roger shot, stabeed, and strangled the British Girl.
Roger (singing): Shoot, Stab, Choke! You're dead!
Stan: That's a pretty cool game you have there.
Klaus: Don't pretend like there's nothing going on.....
Roger: We know why you're really late... (turns off game)
Stan: I told Francine why I was late. Thought you heard.
Klaus: bullbeep.
Roger and Klaus walk up to Stan and gang up on him.
Stan: Okay, I give. What's this thing you think you know about me?
Klaus: You can fly.
Roger: We saw you while we were playing Shoot the Annoying Mascots.
Stan (takes out becker): This stuff? The CIA invented it to make people fly.
Roger: I want in on it!
Stan: OKay, and if I don't?
Klaus: We'll tell Francine you're eating out again! After all, when Roger was in Iraq, I convinced you to tell her. I have ways to make her believe it again......
Stan (scared): NO! NOT THAT! NOT THAT! (runs away)
Klaus: We did it, Roger!
Roger (Maxwell Smart voice): We did the old "Blackmail the CIA Agent So We Can Have Some Fun Trick".
Scene 4:
Roger and Stan were in his study. Roger has a plan as to what to do with the potion.
Stan: What's this plan you have with the potion?
Roger: We are going to become superheroes!
Stan: Bullock was right about this......Seriously? Superheroes? That's the dream of geeky 20-something slackers!
Roger: Just thought of a cool name for you. What about, "The Patriot Missile"?
Stan: I stand corrected. Like the name. It's sounds so George Bush!
Roger starts making their costumes. Stan's costume consisted of car parts, gray cape and boots, and a black spandex suit. Roger's was a monkey mask, monkey suit that only fit the torso, a yellow cape and red boots, and a tarzan outfit. Stan's helmet was black and Roger's was yellow, as were the same colors as their eyemasks. They then sip the potion.
Stan: Wow! I'm an even bigger man of the law, now!
Roger: Check out mine!
Stan: You look like you walked off the set of Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla! Martin and Lewis rip-offs!
Roger: For I am your faithful sidekick, Spanky Monkey!
Klaus (walks in): Can I be in on this too?
Stan: Sure you can, Klaus. Just don't tell Francine.
Roger: You can report crimes to us with that old police radio. You can be like Chloe from 24!
Klaus: All right, I guess. I'm never part of the action.
Stan and Roger both jump out of the window and fly around Langley Falls.
Roger: Now all you need is a catchphrase!
Stan: I got one! BEE HEE HEE HA HA! Good thing I'm trained in hand to hand combat!
Scene 5:
The next night, Stan and Roger got done eating and ran into the study, much to Francine's chagrin. Roger opens a bookcase that has two poles inside. Stan and Roger slide down the poles and become The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey. They take a tank from the CIA to drive around and wait for Klaus to report a ctime as they drove into the night.
Patriot Missile: Well, I wonder what fun adventures await us?
Spanky Monkey: Maybe we'll bust a prostitution ring!
The car radio beeps.
Spanky Monkey: Oh, there's Klaus now. (picks up the mic to the police radio): What's the
sitaution, 'Chloe'? (laughs)
Klaus: Very funny, dickhead! There's a bank robbery in progress in Chimdale.
Patriot Missile: Any word on who it is?
Klaus: No, the police report said, unknown assilants in Obama masks.
Patriot Missile: As Dick Tracy used to say, "we're on our way"! Chimdale's a long way off.
Spanky Monkey (puts down mic): How about we play some mood music to get us pumped?
Patriot Missile: What do you have?
Spanky Monkey (picks up CD): Soundgarden Superunknown!
Patroit Missile: Play Black Hole Sun!
Spanky Monkey puts in the CD and Black Hole Sun plays as they drive into Chimdale.
Patriot Missile: Wish we Republicans had a 'black hole sun', suck in those whiny democrats!
Scene 6:
At the Chimdale National Bank, two robbers in Obama masks are holding everyone hostage. Greg and Terry were there, too.
Greg: If only there was someone here to save us!
Terry: This is the end, we're gonna die! Libby's going to be an orphan!
Greg and Terry were hugging each other.
Bank Robber #1: Shut up you whiny little beep!
Bank Robber #2: Anyone moves, we'll fill them full of holes like swiss cheese!
A crash is heard and in comes Stan and Roger as the Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey. They both fly into the bank.
Bank Robber #1: Who the beep are you?
Patriot Missile: I am the Patriot Missile! I am here to bring you to justice!
Bank Robber #2: What the beep are you supposed to be? RoboCop?
Spanky Monkey: I'm his sidekick, Spanky Monkey! Ooooh, that's really tough, two black gang bangers picking on some helpless gays!
Greg: We resent that!
Terry: I work out at the gym!
Bank Robber #1: We's gonna lick your honky asses, so don't beep with us!
The Bank Robbers dove at The Patriot Missile, and he beat them up. He punched and kicked them.
Patriot Missile: Swing Low! Rob Lowe! Chad Lowe!
The Bank Robbers, even thought they're beaten, they try to shoot The Patriot Missile, but he's bullet proof, then Spanky Monkey takes out a whip with a banana at the end.
Bank Robber #1: We shoot you now, goofy asshole!
Spanky Monkey: Like Al Pacino in Scarface! Say Hello To My Little Friend!
Spanky Monkey uses his whip to take the guns away from the Bank Robbers.
Greg: Wow! These people are amazing!
Terry: They're like Knights In Shining Armour!
Bank Robber #2: What the hell, man?
Spanky Monkey: You're both about to be banished......
Bank Robber #1: What cho talkin' 'bout, Homes?
Spanky Monkey: Banished into a Football Stadium!
Much to everyone's surprise, Spanky Monkey spins hinself into a torando and the Robbers get thrown into the night sky. Everyone clapped and cheered.
Patriot Missile: If they had stayed in school, they wouldn't have talked in ebonics!
Greg: Oh, thank you Patriot Missile for saving us!
Terry: How can we ever repay you?
Spanky Monkey: How about doing a news report on us?
Greg and Terry: We will!
The Patriot Missile: You can go home now, knowing that you're safe. Until next time. BEE HEE HEE HA HA!
Spanky Monkey and The Patriot Missile fly away into the night sky with Greg, Terry, and everyone else in the bank waving at them.
Scene 7:
The next night, Stan and Roger were watching Greg and Terry on the local news.
Stan: Here it comes, Roger! Here is comes!
Greg: Good Evening. On the news today, we were rescued by some mysterious heroes.
Terry: We were in the midst of a bank robbery in Chimdale, only to be saved by the one known as The Patriot Missile!
Greg: We interviewed him this morning and here's what he had to say.....
The screen shows Stan as the Patriot Missile, as he was being interviewed, his head was turning side to side.
Patriot Missile (on TV): Wherever there is crime in Langley Falls, beware! Because I will be there! Justice will always prevail when we are around.......
Roger: Sheesh, Stan. Why are you moving your head back and forth?
Stan: I wasn't. The camera man had Parkinsons.
Francine (angerly): Stan?! Why did you walk out of dinner.....
Roger: Look, Frannie! A superhero's in town.
Patriot Missile (on TV): So remember boys and girls. Love your country, stay in school, eat lots of meats, and remember that crimes like converting to Islam never pays! BEE HEE HEE HA HA!
Francine: Wow! He seems amazing. Wonder who he really is? Anyway, why did you walk out on.....
Just then, a siren that sounded like a cellphone ringtone is heard. Stan and Roger run upstairs.
Stan: I'll go fix whatever that is.....
Roger: I'll go with him for moral support.
Francine (turns of TV): Ohhhh! I'll find out what's going on.......
Stan and Roger run into the study,open the bookcase, sip some potion, slide down the pole and once again become the Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey.
Roger: I'm like Denis Leary in Rescue Me!
Stan: The Ref was one of his better works......
Spanky Monkey and The Patriot Missile run into the tank and ride into town. The Patriot Missile answers the police radio via a mic.
Patriot Missile: What's the situation, Klaus?
Klaus: There's actually two crimes. The Russian Mafia are doing a drug ring at the docs, and there's a burning building.
Spanky Monkey: Like Steve McGarrett in Hawaii Five-0, 10-4!
Patriot Missile: You going to do that tornado thingy again? And where did you get that from?
Spanky Monkey: A lot of superheroes spin themselves into tornadoes. Uma Thurman did it in My Super Ex-Girlfriend.
Patriot Missile: Maybe that potion does more for aliens than it does humans. Anyway, the law of the superhero states that the sidekick can never have better powers than the hero!
Spanky Monkey (scoffs): And you think I have a big ego.
The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey have arrived on the docs.
Scene 8:
At the Docs, The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey come out of the tank and hide, they are on the other side of the docs, only to see Steve, Snot, Barry, and Toshi get beat up by the Russian Mafia.
Steve: Stop! Why are you beating us up, for?
Snot: We never done anything to you.
Barry: We're just little kids.
Toshi (in Japanese): If only I had my samari sword!
Russian Gangster #1: We just like to beat up kids!
Russian Gangster #2: Yes, especially geeks like you! (laughs evilly).
Russian Gangster #3: You're getting beaten because you refuse to buy drugs from us!
Patriot Missile: I remember those guys. They tied me up once because I had evidence against them.
Spanky Monkey: Remember them, too. I entangled with them when I was a corrupt cop that one time.
Then they both come out of hiding and fly over the river to the other side of the docs.
Patriot Missile: BEE HEE HEE HA HA!!!!
Russian Gangster #4: Who are you?
Patriot Missile: Your worst nightmare! And here to serve justice on a plate served ice cold! Prepare to feel our wrath you commie bastards!
Spanky Monkey: Kids, stay away!
Steve, Snot, Barry, and Toshi are lead to safety by Spanky Monkey and watch the fight.
Patriot Missile (beating up the gangsters): You'll all about to fall down! Michael Douglas style!
Two of them come after Spanky Monkey.
Russian Gangster #3: Who are you supposed to be?
Spanky Monkey: I am Spanky Monkey! The trusted sidekick that quotes movie lines while I'm kicking ass!
Russian Gangster #4 (holding a gun to Spanky Monkey): I got a better name for you! What about, "Poorly Dressed Dead Guy!" (laughs evilly).
Spanky Monkey: Like Terrance Stamp in Superman 2, Kneel Before Spank!
As the Russian Mafia try to get after Roger, he takes out his whip and snatches away their guns, and makes them slip on the banana that's attached to the whip.
Patriot Missile: Swing Low! Rob Lowe! Chad Lowe! (punches and kicks the gangsters)
Then The Patriot Missile throws the Russian Gangsters into the sky and they both land in a police car. Then Spanky Monkey finishes off the other two by pressing a button on his belt that makes a boxing glove come out and punch them.
Spanky Monkey: Hurt's don't it? Go tell the others!
Then those two gangsters fly into the sky and land into a police car as well, and the police car drives away.
Steve: Wow! Thank you! You're like the Christian Bale version of Batman!
Snot: That was awesome! You were both A-1, and I don't mean the steak sauce!
Barry: Can you be our bodyguards so you can beat up bullies for us?
Patriot Missile: We'd love to, but we are needed elsewhere.
Spanky Monkey: In the meantime, stay away from that geeky fandom stuff! Chicks hate that!
Steve, Snot, Barry, and Toshi say their goodbyes. Just a block away The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey see a burning building in the distance. They both fly to it.
Patriot Missile: BEE HEE HEE HA HA!
Spanky Monkey: Like Bender from Futurama, Let's Go Already!
Once they get to the scene of the fire, they were already too late. People were on fire running out of the building and screaming.
Patriot Missile: Oh, no! We're too late! Superheroes are _always_ on time!
Spanky Monkey: Maybe there's still some hope! There always is....
Patriot Missile: Are you beeping kidding me right now? Look at that place, you dumbass! It's like the series finale of House!
Spanky Monkey: Yeah, tell me about it. Somebody must've left Stan Laurel in charge!
Patriot Missile: Or Richard Pryor!
Spanky Monkey and Patriot Missile (together): Oooooooooohhhhhhhhh!
Then they both put out the fire by using firehoses built inside their costumes. The fire eventually was put out. Meanwhile from another distance, Sergei sees the whole thing, everything from the Russian Mafia and the burning building.
Sergei: The Patriot Missile will pay for what he did to thise Russian Gangsters! Let's see how patriotic he is once I get through with him! (laughes evilly)
A thunderbolt strikes as Sergei is laughing.
Scene 9:
The next night, Francine was in Stan's study with Hayley.
Hayley: Any luck trying to find out why Dad keeps ditching you?
Francine: Nope, not so far! (scoffs angerly): He always does this to me! First him and Roger are cryptic about their trip to Atlantic City, then he divorces me for some competitive bitch, then that whole Valentine's Day scenario, then he ditches me for some posessed hot tub, he reveals to me that he never liked my cooking, and recently, he leaves me to try to track down a killer on our vacation! What the beep is going on?
Hayley (picks up beaker): This seems to be half full.
Francine: You could be onto something there, Hayley.
Stan and Roger run into the living room, turn on the TV and watch the news. Hayley and Francine soon join them, and they decide not to confront them about the beaker.
Greg: Good evening, Langley Falls, in the news today, the Patriot Missile strikes again.
Terry: Yes indeed he has! Last night, he took down some Russian Gangsters and saved people from a burning building!
Francine: Hmmmm. Why can't you be more like the Patriot Missile, Stan? I'll be _he_ doesn't keep ditching his wife after dinner every night!
Roger: Careful, Frannie! Don't compare Stan to other men.
Stan: I doubt he even had a wife. He's probably gay.
Hayley: Steve told me The Patriot Missile saved him. Wonder who he really is?
Then on the TV, an alert is heard.
Greg (shocked): Oh, no! This just in! Someone wants to challange The Patriot Missile.
Terry (shocked): You're right, sweetie! It's ex-KGB agent Sergei......can't pronounce his last name!
Greg: This is what he had to say, switch camera!
Then Sergei comes on the TV with an annoucement.
Sergei: Attention Patriot Missile. You will pay for what you did to those Russian Mobsters! They happened to be good friends of mine. Come to the Langley Falls Civic Center tonight! Everyone is invited to see the Patriot Missile go up against my boxing android...Sputnik! Be there, or Beware!
Sputnik looks like a fat, bald, muscular man who is wearing a Russian hat and and boxers with a hammer and sickle on them.
Francine: Hey, Stan. You don't have to go anywhere, tonight. How about we go see this boxing match?
Stan: Sure, love to. Want to see The Patriot Missile kick some commie ass!
Roger: Yeah, Frannie, we wouldn't miss that for the world!
Hayley: Boxing? Jeff and I are going to protest against this!
Francine: Everyone go upstairs and get ready.
Stan and Roger fool Francine into thinking he's taking a shower. They both sneak off and do their usual routine to become The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey. They all go to the Langley Falls Civic Center to meet Sputnik.
Spanky Monkey: What do we say to Francine? She's going to notice you're gone.
Patriot Missile: I wrote her a note and told her I'd meet her.
They both drive the tank to the Civic Center.
Scene 10:
At the Langley Falls Civic Center, Jeff and Hayley were already there protesting against the boxing match. Francine sits in the front row. Bulock, Jackson, Reginald, and Dick were there, too.
Francine: Hope Stan shows up soon. (sees Bullock) What are you guys doing here?
Bullock: We're here to root for The Patriot Missile.
Reginald: Quiet dudes, it's about to begin!
The Patriot Missile, Spanky Monkey, and Sputnik are all in the ring. Sergei was under the ring with a remote control.
Francine: Stan told me he'd be here. He left me a note.
Bullock: I'm sure he'll turn up.
Spanky Monkey: I'm going to be likr Burgess Meredith in those Rocky movies.
The referee introduces them and gives them rules.
Referee: In this corner, the champion! Patriot Missile!
Everyone cheers.
Referee: In this corner the challanger! Sputnik!
Everyone boos.
Referee: All right, you two. I want a good, clean fight. No hitting below the belt or nothing like that. Now let's get it on!
Spanky Monkey: LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE! (rings bell).
Patriot Missile: This'll be easy, like Tyson and Holyfield back in '95! BEE HEE HEE HA HA!
As The Patriot Missile tries to fight Sputnik, he proves too powerful for him.
Patriot Missile: What the hell?
Sputnik: I must break you! (punches The Patriot Missile into the ground).
Patriot Missile: Why you son of a bitch, I'll.....
Sergei uses his remote control to hold The Patriot Missile down on a magnet. Under the stage so Sputnik could beat him up.
Sputnik: I must break you! (punches The Patriot Missile mulitiple times).
Francine: Oh, no! He's losing. If only there was some way I can....
Then Francine discovers the magnet under the ring.
Francine: If only Stan was here to see......Oh, hell! I'll be right back.
Bullock: Where are you going?
Spanky Monkey: Do you Swing Low, Rob Lowe moves!
Patriot Missile: I want to, but I can't!
Spanky Monkey: Patriot Missile, you're a BUM!
Then Spanky Monkey tries to whip Sputnik with his banana whip to now avail. Sergei is under the ring enjoying what he started.
Sergei (laughs evilly): Patriotism will die! Communism will prevail!
Francine goes under the stage with a rope that has a U-shaped magnet tied to the end, and twirls it. Hayley wondered what she was doing.
Hayley: Mom, you're not promoting this barbaric sport, are you?
Francine: I feel I must help The Patriot Missile, I feel connected to him somehow.
Sergei notices the U-shaped magnet and it comes his way and then it disables the magnet that was holding The Patriot Missile down who was now free from it's grip. Francine pulled the rope back and the whole ring collapses.
Hayley: Where did you learn how to do that?
Francine: You learn a lot of tricks when you're in prison, if you catch my drift.
Sergei (sees Francine): Stan's wife!
Francine: Yes, you commie asshole! We meet again!
Sergei gets chased by Francine and everyone cheers as The Patriot Missile was beating up Sputnik. Then soon stops as he sees Francine chase Sergei. Spunky Monkey and he get off the stage and follow them.
Scene 11 Conclusion:
Everyone in the audience was murmuring as Jeff and Hayley went into the ring.
Jeff: You should all be ashamed of youselves.
Hayley: Entertaining yourselves with violence!
Jeff: Non-violence can be just as fun.....(hands Hayley a bucket)
Bullock: I can't believe I dated her once.
Reginald: Me, neither dawg!
Hayley: We are going to entertain you with non-violence! Watch!
Jeff looks on as Hayley throws water at Sputnik which causes him to deactivate.
Sputnik (sputtering): I.....must.......break.....you.......
Meanwhile back stage The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey confront Sergei who was tied to a chair.
Patriot Missile: What happened to you, comrade?
Sergei: She's what happened to me!
Francine was sitting on a ledge on the ceiling.
Spanky Monkey: The jig is up, stroganoff! You're going downtown, where all the lights are bright!
Sergei: Never! I'm not beated yet!
Just then a bunch of guys in Russian suits comes into the room.
Spanky Monkey (laughs): What is this, Yakov Smirnoff Appriciation Day?
Sergei: ATTACK!
The Russians charge at The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey. The Russians try to beat them up, but fail. Even Francine gets in on the fight by kicking them.
Patriot Missile: Swing Low! Rob Lowe! Chad Lowe!
Spanky Monkey: Get on my whip! The banana whip!
The Russians were soon defeated and Sergei gets knocked on the head.
Patriot Missile: We did it, old chum! All in a good days work!
Spanky Monkey: Holy Ass Kicking!
Patriot Missile: And thank you, kind civilian.
Francine: You're welcome. For all you did in Langley Falls, it was the least I can do. Wish my husband would meet you, but he keeps ditching me.....
They all walk out of the civic center.
Spanky Monkey: Since this is all over, I guess we could tell you.
The Patriot Missile and Spanky Monkey reveal themselves to be Stan and Roger.
Francine: Stan? You were The Patriot Missile?
Stan: Sure was, Francine. Bullock invented a flying potion. Wanted to do more than just be a CIA agent......
Francine: So you became a superhero?
Stan: Correct. But now I see, I don't need to be a hero.
Roger: And I already have enough alter egos to last me a lifetime.
Stan: Then I realized I already am a hero.
Francine: You sure are, honey. You'll always be my hero, Stan Smith.
As Stan and Francine were about to kiss, Klaus calls them from The Police Radio in their tank.
Klaus: There's another crime! Someone hypnotized a bunch of mental hospital patients and they're wrecking havox.....
Roger (into mic): Sorry, Klaus, we're not doing it anymore! (breaks police radio)
Klaus: NEIN!
Stan: Let's go home and leave crime fighting to the professionals.
Francine: And here I thought you lost interest in me, and leave to go eat out....
Stan: I already have adventure in my life. I'll never sneak out again.
Roger: What do you all say we go to the bar and get hammered!
Francine: Yes, Tequila shots on me! Whooooo!
Stan, Roger, and Francine leave the Civic Center and the tank and walk to the bar. As they were going there, a kid and a teenage babysitter come up to Roger.
Child: My Mommy says everytime The Patriot Missile says BEE HEE HEE HA HA, an angel gets it's wings!
Roger: You're Mommy is full of beep! Hey, fellas wait for me!
Then Roger runs to join Stan and Francine.
Stan: BEE HEE HEE HA HA!
Closing Credits.


text:
For services included on a Participant's IPC, a supplemental form is completed by thePprovider and sent to the Case Manager before the IPC is submitted to the Division. Objectives are required for habilitation services but do not need to be sent to the Division with the IPC.
These are only samples and are not required to be used. Providers may develop their own schedules with input from the participant and team, which align with the documentation requirements listed in Chapter 45.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
Roast pear, mizuna and parmesan salad
The mild mustard flavour of mizuna contrasts well with the sweet roasted pears.
To Prep |
To Cook |
AVG RATING (1 Member) |
recipe To my
- Ingredients
- Olive oil, for greasing
- 3 firm beurre bosc pears
- 60ml (1/4 cup) olive oil
- 1 1/2 tsp ground coriander
- Salt & ground black pepper, to taste
- 1 tbs fresh lemon juice
- 2 tsp honey
- 1 bunch mizuna, stems trimmed, washed, dried
- 80g piece parmesan, shaved
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New to mizuna I needed some ideas and this salad was amazing. The pears I had were small and hard and when spiced and roasted tasted like a light potatoes. The honey/lemon dressing worked perfectly to bring the mizuna and spicy pears together. I actually forgot to add the parmesan and didn't miss it so this could be a great vegan option. Prep and cooking time was spot on.
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Good Taste food editor Michelle Southan organises a Middle Eastern feast with her mothers' group.
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breaking news
Helpful Links
List of High Schools:
Missing and Exploited Children
Jasper County - Missouri
- History
- Reverse 911
- Storm Shelter Inventory
- Health Department
- Route 66 Museum
- Assessment Data
- Pay Personal Property Tax Online
- Personal Property Look-Up
- Joplin Area Chamber of Commerce
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Newton County - Missouri
- Historical Society
- Pay Personal Property Tax Online
- Neosho Area Chamber of Commerce
- Sheriff's Office
Crawford County - Kansas
Community Interest
Joplin School Supplies Fair
Toni Valliere talks with Andy Martin, the manager of the 15th Street Wal-Mart, about the upcoming Joplin School Supplies Fair at MSSU.
Read More» -
Joplin Community Garden Project
Erik Wright, one of the founders of the Joplin Community Garden Project, talks about how it all began.
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Megan's Baby Arrives
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Chris Cotten Interview, Part 2
Joplin Parks & Recreation Director Chris Cotten talks with Philip about the future of Joplin parks damaged in the tornado.
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Chris Cotten Interview, Part 1
Joplin Parks & Recreation Director Chris Cotten talks about the challenges of rebuilding the parks devastated by the May 22nd tornado.
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Yakov Tix and Producer Chat
Toni and Philip give viewers a chance to win tickets to Yakov's Dinner Adventure in Branson, and chat with Producer Marian Kelly about her participation...
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LIVING WELL: Joplin Youth Football
Matt Santamaria introduces us to the Joplin Youth Football program.
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LIVING WELL: Dr. C.J. Huff Interview, Part 2
Joplin Schools Superintendent Dr. C.J. Huff talks about the emotional well-being of students.
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LIVING WELL: Dr. C.J. Huff Interview, Part 1
Dr. C.J. Huff, Superintendent of Joplin Schools, discusses the devastation of the school system by the May 22nd tornado, and how the school system is...
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LIVING WELL: Ozark Center for Autism Event
We learn about an upcoming event at the Ozark Center for Autism.
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Page 117 of 135
Pet Talk | Nose for News
Ron Zuber - 4 Paws Doggie Daycare
Greetings from Kabul, Afghanistan ...
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Dogs Rescued From Puppy Mill
The Joplin Humane Society rescues more than thirty dogs from a puppy mill.
Read More» -
Brad's Beat: Ashes the Fire Dog
Jasper County, MO- A four legged friend is sniffing out crime with two different departments. The Jasper County Sheriff's Department has their first dog that...
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Faithful Friends Animal Advocates Adoption Day
Adoptions, Costume Contests, and a Chance to win a 2011 Camaro ... What a way to spend the weekend!
Read More» -
Faithful Friends "Pawscars Gala"
Sonja Friend of the Faithful Friends Animal Advocates talks with Toni about the organization's upcoming fundraiser, the "Pawscars Gala."
Read More» -
Cat Show
Toni talks with cat show organizer Suzy Duncan about an upcoming event, and how it's different from dog shows.
Read More» -
Last Tornado Dog Needs a Forever Home
Just when it seemed all the tornado pets had found new homes, there's one still waiting for a family.
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World's Largest Dog Biscuit
A Joplin pet food company works to set a new world record for the largest dog biscuit ever.
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Main Street Pet Care- Rescue Dogs Pt. 2- June 21, 2011
Dr. Ben Leavens recounts more of his experience with the search and rescue dogs as well as the start of an organization to help get...
Read More» -
Main Street Pet Care- Rescue Dogs Pt. 1- June 21, 2011
Dr. Ben Leavens talks about his experience with the search and rescue dogs that arrived in Joplin following the tornado.
Read More»
Page 12 of 20
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Only Cantonese read 係 as 'Hai'.but Mandarin, Cantonese dialects(including Taishanese) and Japanese prounounce 係 as "Hai" and i know that Hakka and Minnan share some words that are similar because they live right next to each other in Chaoshan region and in southern Fujian.
We do have "Hai" in Mandarin and Japanese but they are not the word 係.
For example, 海 is "hai3" in Mandarin and "配" is "hai" in Sino-Japanese, and as for 係 its Sino-Japanese is kei and its Mandarin is xi4
Japanese "hai" is unrelated to Chinese 係, just like English "aye" is unrelated to Chinese.
(The usage of Japanese "hai" is just like English "aye": it can mean "yes" but it can't mean "to be" i.e. "X aye Y" is invalid grammatically.)
Words with h- in Cantonese will be k-/g- in Japanese so they can't be a regular correspondence.
In fact, the words starting with h- in Modern Japanese started with p- in Ancient Japanese, we can see that even in Sino-Japanese: 八 is hatsu not patsu 変 is hen and not pen.
A simple way to say it is that "koku" ends with "u", not "k".they do have the final -k consonant like the word "Country" is pronounced as Koku.
So the "k" did survive, but not as an ending.
There's nothing special with having "n-" initial. It's common across the world.And the initial n- like the word Japan = Nip Pon (Ngit Pon in Taishanese Canto), Person = Nin (Ngin in Taishanese Canto) and the number 2 = Ni (Ngi in Taishanese Canto).
Edited by qrasy, 21 January 2009 - 09:40 AM.


text:
Sweet message of His amazing love for you. It is surrounded by beautiful flowers created individually, just as He created you individually. "Because He First Loved Me" - 1 John 4:10, "This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."
We offer free shipping on exchanges on USA orders only.
Bible Saying T shirt


text:
Published November 10, 2012, 07:48 AM
Bison Inn marks opening
Submitted photo Members of the Jamestown Area Chamber of Commerce Ambassador Committee held a ribbon-cutting ceremony at The Bison Inn. The business is located next to the Super 8 Motel at 2627 Highway 281 S., Jamestown. Pictured with the Ambassadors are owners Kalpesh, Nirav and Mahesh Patel. For more information call 952-9800. Businesses qualify for a ribbon-cutting ceremony if they open, move, remodel, are under new ownership or change their name. For more information, contact Lisa by emailing firstname.lastname@example.com.


text:
Watch: Ellen Page and Alexander Skarsgård on 'The East' and the indie-blockbuster balance
The thriller recently had its world premiere at the Sundance Film Festival
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PARK CITY - Ahead of its premiere last Sunday, Zal Batmanglij's second feature "The East" -- which I reviewed earlier this morning -- was one of the most curiously awaited titles of this year's Sundance fest, not least because his first collaboration with writer-producer-star Brit Marling, "Sound of My Voice," made such a splash in Park City two years ago.
With their reputations thus established, the pair could command some bigger names for their follow-up -- among them, "True Blood" star Alexander Skarsgård and Oscar-nominated actress Ellen Page. Both have key roles to play in this topical thriller on the theme of corporate terrorism, in which an intelligence agent (Marling) infiltrates The East, a mysterious group of left-wing anarchists bent on punishing corrupt corporations for their social and environmental misdeeds.
Want More...
Sundance Film Festival?
- Check out everything there is including photos, reviews, videos.
Skarsgård plays Benji, the group's strong but soft-spoken leader, whose relationship with Marling's character gradually takes an intimate turn; Page, meanwhile, plays Izzy, the group's most outspoken and reactionary member, whose motivations for her involvement in The East are slightly different from those of her fellow members.
Both actors relished the chance to be in a film that, as suspenseful and entertaining as it is, carries a relevant political message for a wide-ranging audience. Did their roles in "The East" tap into some of their personal values and convictions?
We also talk about the experience both actors have had in moving between independent productions like "The East" and blockbusters like "Inception" (for Page) and "Battleship" (for Skarsgård) and what they've gained from that balance. Page, meanwhile, is double-dipping at Sundance this year: she also stars in Lynn Shelton's dramedy "Touchy Feely," which premiered last week. She talks about the privilege of representing two very different facets of American independent cinema at the festival.
Check out the full video interview above, and look out for our accompanying chat with Brit Marling and Zal Batmanglij, coming soon.
January 23, 2013 at 8:22PM EST Reply to Comment
Ellen is in love. Watch the way they look at each other
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The Northwest: Places to Explore
- Overview
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Rosses Point
It's obvious why W. B. and Jack B. Yeats often stayed at Rosses Point during their summer vacations: glorious pink-and-gold summer sunsets over a seemingly endless stretch of sandy beach. Coney Island lies just off Rosses Point. Local lore has it that the captain of the ship Arathusa christened Brooklyn's Coney Island after this one, but there's probably more legend than truth to this, as it's widely agreed that New York's Coney Island was named after the Dutch word konijn (wild rabbits, which abounded there during the 17th century).
Elsewhere in The Northwest
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- $1336 & up -- Ireland: 6-Nt. Ritz-Carlton Escape w/Air Sceptre Tours
- $1799 -- British Isles: 7-Night Windstar Cruise, 70% Off Windstar Cruises
- Ireland and the British Isles IExplore
- $1165 -- Irish Cities & Scenery Tour: 7-Nts. w/Guide — $1,165 Sceptre Tours
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OSBP Vision and Mission
How To Do Business with NASA
Business Development and Technology
Small Business Programs
Awards and Achievement
Contact Us
Communications Plan
Provide information and guidance concerning the release of NASA's Office of Small Business Programs (OSBP) policies and accomplishments.
Provide timely, relevant, and accurate internal and public information about NASA's Small Business Programs. Guarantee the widest distribution of internal and public information through print, electronic, and Internet outlets while ensuring that the proper procurement and acquisition policies are followed.
The Obama Administration created the Small Business Procurement Group to ensure Federal agencies meet the mandated prime and subcontracting small business goals. The key to achieving NASA's small business contracting goals is through communication among NASA's leadership, senior officials, Center Directors, and workforce directly involved in the acquisition process.
NASA's Office of Communications (NOC) is the responsible staff office for internal and public release of information regarding Agency programs. NOC will use appropriate information and data supplied by OSBP for internal and external releases about small business programs, events, and success stories. NOC serves as the focal point for media inquiries about small business programs.
The OSBP Web site remains the primary repository of data about the Agency's various small business programs.
Key Information
The communications posture for the small business program is active. Two letters will be sent each year regarding NASA's small business programs from the following individuals:
- The Administrator.
- The OSBP Associate Administrator and the Senior Procurement Executive.
- Follow appropriate procurement and acquisition regulations when releasing any internal or external information.
- NOC will primarily use internal electronic outlets to distribute appropriate information provided by OSBP to selected NASA officials and employees. The effort will not duplicate OSBP Web site data.
- Act as principal internal, media, and public release outlet, as appropriate, for Agency small business program information.
- Respond to media inquiries about the program.
- Determine the methods for internal and public release of program information.
- NASA Center communications offices provide similar support for local programs.
- Refer media inquiries about the small business program to NOC or, if appropriate, respond immediately to routine requests for information.
- Maintain OSBP Web site and social media operations.
- Schedule senior NASA leadership for internal program presentations during appropriate Center visits and live and electronic conferences.
- Provide NOC with timely information about successful or unique small business program achievements and key contracts.
Key Messages
- NASA fully supports and assists small businesses in high-technology areas that include technology transfer and commercialization of technology.
- The Agency provides all types of small businesses with practical opportunities to participate in NASA prime contracts and subcontracts.
- NASA is engaged in and deeply committed to ensuring that all types of small businesses have a fair chance to participate in Federal contracting opportunities. Small business contracting is a high priority in the Agency's procurement process.
- NASA provides the Agency's acquisition workforce with training about new legislation, as it is issued, to remain current on the tools and small business contracting policies.
- OSBP is committed to increasing and participating in small business networking; matchmaking events; congressional, Federal, state, and local government small business outreach activities; conferences; training events; partnerships; and working groups.
- OSBP will list planned outreach and small business training events on the office Web site at http://osbp.nasa.gov and the Federal Business Opportunities Web site at https://www.fbo.gov.
- OSBP will post success stories on the Office of Management and Budget MAX system at https://max.omb.gov/community/x/EwFoIQ.
NOC Communications Plan Points of Contact
David Weaver
Sonja Alexander
202-358-1761 x1600
OSBP Communications Plan Points of Contacts
Glenn A. Delgado
Tabisa T. Tepfer


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This was a wonderful family holiday rental, right across from the beach, close to restaurants, Coles, coffee and everything! Close to the boardwalk, lovely walk, make sure you pack the scooters / bikes or skateboards for the kids! You wouldn't even need to use your car the whole holiday!
- Also Known As:
- Burleigh Point Apartments Burleigh Heads, Gold Coast
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- Burleigh Point Apartments is situated at the northern end of Burleigh Heads.We are a 3 story apartment block about 86 steps to the beach and walking distance to shops, surf clubs restaurants and bars.UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT AS OF AUGUST 2012. ... more less
- Reservation Options:
- TripAdvisor is proud to partner with Travelocity, HostelWorld, Hotels.com, Agoda, Expedia and Venere so you can book your Burleigh Point Apartments reservations with confidence. We help millions of travellers each month to find the perfect hotel for both holiday and business trips, always with the best discounts and special offers.


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This week on The Watchtower there's a metric ton of things to get to!
First up, the New 52 is a year old. DC put all their eggs in one basket, but who won? Who Lost? And Can we expect the same result from Marvel NOW?
Then, we dispel some crossover rumors, talk about Marvel's "Player To Be Named Later" movie trade and of course, the shattering of the marriage of Storm & T'Challa!
Plus more News, The Forecast and a special birthday greeting to a special friend!
The show doesn't end there though! Have your say 24/7! TUMBLR TWITTER PHONE: (347) 655-3000!


text:
HI All,
For my application I use the following meta viewport:
All is well but when I rotate the blackberry phone to landscape orientation it looks as if the screen is not horizontally resized but the content is only rotated resulting in a very narrow display of the content with large black areas on the sides.
How can I configure my phonegap in such a way so that users can change their orientation whilst the content always using the maximum amount of space?
Kind regards,
Help get this topic noticed by sharing it on
Facebook, or email.
oeps :-)
the meta tag was ommitted again. here it is:
meta name="viewport" content="height=device-height, width=device-width, user-scalable=no" -
Hi Ed
Have you include a device orientation setting on config.xml
< preference name="orientation" value="default" />
-Amir -
Hi Amir,
I have added the orientation preference set to default but the problem still remains.
The problem is that when the user changes their orientation on the blackberry the screen is not redrawn only rotated.
This results in when the user starts the applicaiton in landscape mode ( full width and height are used as the applicaiton is being drawn for the first time ) and then reorients to portrait mode alot of content is falling off the right side.
When the user starts the application in portrait mode ( full width and height are used as the applicaiton is being drawn for the first time ) and then reorients to landscape mode alot of unused black space appears on the right side.
Is this a known issue? I really hope this can be avoid by having the screen redrawn on the blackberry on orientation change.
Kind regards,
Ed -
Hey Ed
Turn out this user having similar issue as yours.
Can you try with the same and see if that helps?
-Amir -
HI Amir,
I am sorry to report that the link you profided is not related to my issue. the link is depicting a different problem related to not having a viewport defined.
I do have a viewport defined and I would like to prevent the user from being able to zoom in and out as zooming in and out does not feel like a native applicaiton.
I do however would like the blackberry user from being able to change their orientation at run time without either loosing content on the right side or not making use of all available width. The problem would be fixed if the screen is redrawn on orientation change instead of only rotated.
Kind regards,
Ed -
Hi Ed
Can you share your Build's appid. I'll try to look at it
-Amir -
Hi Amir,
The app id is: 157046
I hoe you can find out what's wrong.
Kind regards,
Ed -
Hi Ed
I haven't look at the code yet but this might be of your interest. Check it out:
onOrientationchange DOM event
CSS3 @media query
-Amir -
Hi Amir,
I am sorry to report that your last suggestion is also a dead end.
The browser always reports 360 clientWidth and 480 clientHeight regardless of wether I start the application in landscape or portrait mode. When I change the orientation the browser still reports 360 clientWidth and 480 clientHeight.
This is why I believe media queries will also be ineffective with solving this problem because I know of no way to force the webview te be redrawn inside the container it is in via css media queries.
If there is a phonegap javascrip API method I can call onOrientationchange that forces the container that contains the webview ( or what ever the object is called that renders the html ) to redraw the webview then the problem is most likely solved.
If that is not possible then the only alternative I see at this stage is to update the native blackberry code to redraw the webview on orientationchange to use the full width and height.
Can you please check out my code and see if this problem also happens on your blackberry?
Kind regards,
Ed -
I'll show some images to explain the problem. Please forgive the bad quality photo's as i made them myself with bad lighting and a rotten camera.
The image below shows what the application looks like when it is started in portrait mode. All content fits nicely in a horizonal manner because the html is adjusting itself to what ever width it has available.
The image below show what happens if the application is then turned to landscape.
You can see that all the content is simply rotated and not horizontally rescaled and a large black unused area appears on the right side between the content and the mousepad of the blackberry.
Now let's reverse the order. We start out in landscape mode ( applicaiton gets drawn for the first time ). You can see that everything fits nicely in a horizonal manner.
and then when we change the orientation to portrait content is falling off because the screen is not being redrawn only rotated. The selected menu item with an orange background you have seen in previous images in the top right corner falls of the screen while the html table has a width of 100% and should always fit whatever the width of the screen.
This behaviour only happens when running the app as native when compiled with phonegap build. If I use the blackberry browser directly to show the html then everything is rescaling very well on orentation change.
WOuld you have more suggestions to explore?
Kind regards,
Ed -
I am sorry to report that I have found no solution as I believe this is an issue with the phonegap wrapper that contains the webview and I have no experience in this field to even consider taking a look under the hood of how phonegap works.
@Amir or phonegap in general. Would you please be so kind to revisit this issue?
Kind regards,
Ed -


text:
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Platte County Woman Drowns in Pool
By: Nick McCutcheon
Updated: November 21, 2012
The Platte County Sheriff's Office, South Platte Fire Department and American Medical Response Paramedics responded to a home around 3 a.m. after the victim's husband found her in the pool.
The victim, whose name is being withheld at this time, was transported to an area hospital before being pronounced dead.
The Platte County Sheriff's Office stated that there were no signs of foul play, but an investigation is being conducted.


text:
Being of Antilogic (3.5e Template)
From D&D Wiki
[edit] Being of Antilogic
This page needs an image. If you are an artist, or know of any image that would fit this page, please upload a picture and add it. |
Beings of Antilogic are pretty much the epitome of errors in logic, their very existence is a bane to all things real and they might or might not care.
[edit] Creating a Being of Antilogic
This is an acquired/inherited template. This template can be added to any creature of intelligence 5 or higher.
[edit] Size and Type
no size change, type changes to outsider(chaotic).
[edit] Hit Dice
+2 to previous HD
[edit] Speed
the creature gains 15ft. to land speed and all other modes of movement increase by 10ft.
[edit] Armor Class
+4 Antilogic bonus to armor class (this bonus is retained for touch and flat-footed AC)
[edit] Attack
Base creature retains the ability to use manufactured and natural weapons. If the base creature has more than one natural attack it gains a +2 Antilogic bonus to all attack with the secondary set of natural attacks.
[edit] Full Attack
All full attacks gain a +5 Antilogic bonus to damage rolls.
[edit] Special Attacks
Base creature gains one of the following: Antilogic blaze(Su): creature may sacrifice 3d6+5 hitpoints to create a fire that acts as a rift to the Realm of Antilogic for 2d6+3 rounds (treat the rift as a gate spell to the Non-Existent Realm of Antilogic) Antilogic sight(Ex): creature gains the ability to see where and when the plane they are on will be overlapped by the Realm of Antilogic.
[edit] Special Qualities
The base creature loses no SQs. The base creature gains blindsense 30ft. and low-light vision.
[edit] Abilities
The base creature's ability scores change as follows: Int -2, Wis -2, Cha +4, Con +2
[edit] Skills
The base creature gains a +5 Antilogic bonus to gather information and intimidate checks.
[edit] Environment
Beings of Antilogic live in the Nonexistant Realm of Antilogic
[edit] Organization
[edit] Challenge Rating
Base creatures CR+3
[edit] Treasure
double standard in items
[edit] Alignment
any Chaotic
[edit] Advancement
By character class
[edit] Level Adjustment
Back to Main Page → 3.5e Homebrew → Creatures → Templates


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PriceUp to $50 (2)$50 - $100 (17)$100 - $250 (14)Diameter10 Inch (13)12 Inch (12)6.5 Inch (2)8 Inch (6)Impedance4 Ohm (4)Number Of Subwoofers1 (14)2 (18)3 (1)Enclosure Type30-3000 (1)Ported (3)ColorBack (1)Black (3)
OnlineCarStereo.com has the largest selection of brand name car stereo, car audio,
car electronics, amplifiers, multimedia and accessories online.
All trademarks and trade names are the property of their respective trademark holders.
OnlineCarStereo.com - The Largest Car Audio and Car Stereo e-commerce Super Store.


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Nail-Business Full Service Manufacturer » Manufacturer » Raw material & Storage
Raw material & StorageFor the production of the G4C gels numerous raw materials are needed that are held in a large off-premises warehouse. Starting as early as with the purchase of the raw materials we set our standards high, as only this way can the final product fullfil our quality expectations. Various safety regulations must be adhered to in regard to the storage of the chemical materials, such as explosion-protection, temperature regulations and fire protection requirements, which can only be fullfiled by special companies.


text:
Tourism RFP
The Bermuda Department of Tourisms contract with Expedia expires this summer and the BDoT are looking for a replacement.
A request for proposal has been posted on the jobs section of US travel industry website Travel Weekly.
The department states in the ad that it is seeking the services of a company that can provide a private label online reservation solution for its websites, both domestically and internationally.
It says the system must allow users of the tourism websites to book flights, accommodation, vacation packages and cruises, and organisations who apply must demonstrate proven experience and a commitment to excellence.
The closing date for the RFP is May 31 at 5pm.
You must be registered or signed-in to post comment or to vote.
Published May 18, 2012 at 8:14 am (Updated May 18, 2012 at 8:13 am)
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- Should liquor stores be able to sell alcohol on Sundays?
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- 27%
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- Total Votes: 2016
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1. Feedback, notes and comments
Gilguy My reference last week to an Australian sense of gilguy led to several informative responses from Down Under. The usual spelling, I'm told, is gilgai. The examples I found with the other spelling were homophonic mistakes. The Macquarie Dictionary says gilgai can also be spelled ghilgai, and defines the word in some detail as "a natural soil formation occurring extensively in inland Australia, characterised by a markedly undulating surface sometimes with mounds and depressions; probably caused by swelling and cracking of clays during alternating wet and dry seasons." The source is the Wiradjuri and Kamilaroi languages, in which gilgaay means a water-hole.
2. Weird Words: Subfusc
Dull, dark or gloomy.
This word is almost unknown in the USA but may be found in literary writing in Britain. It was spotlit by news in March 2006 that a poll of undergraduates in Oxford had overwhelmingly rejected proposals by the University authorities that they should no longer wear subfusc during examinations.
The word emerged in the early years of the eighteenth century. It is related to the older fusk, long obsolete, for a dark brown or dusky colour. That's from Latin fuscus, dusky, which has also given us the rare adjective fuscous for a dark and sombre colour. Subfusc was taken directly from the Latin subfuscus, in which in this case the prefix means "of the approximate colour" (two other examples are subalbidus, whitish, and subviridis, greenish).
Outside its academic usage, the word is mainly used for formal or unshowy clothing, or figuratively to suggest a sombre appearance. An example is in John Buchan's novel Sick Heart River of 1941: "As his eyes thirstily drank in the detail he saw that there was little colour in the scene. Nearly all was subfusc, monochrome, and yet so exquisite was the modelling that there was nothing bleak in it; the impression rather was of a chaste, docile luxuriance."
3. Recently noted
It's all Irish Many people pointed me to an item in the New York Times this week, in which Daniel Cassidy contends that many of the most common slang terms used in American English actually have an Irish origin; for example he claims that buddy has its origin in bodach, Irish for a lusty youth; that Say uncle! derives from anacal, mercy; that dude originates in dúid, a dolt or foolish-looking fellow, and that bunkum is from buanchumadh, a long made-up story. Many of us have doubts. My piece below about dude — and an earlier one about Say uncle! — show that I disagree with him about the origins of at least two of the words he lists that I've been able to research in detail. Also, the origin of bunkum is firmly linked historically to Buncombe County, North Carolina, through its being mentioned in a long and inconsequential speech in Congress by its congressman solely to please his constituents. Mr Cassidy's 68-page book, How the Irish Invented Slang, last month won an American Book Award for non-fiction from the Before Columbus Foundation, so he is clearly taken seriously in some quarters. But Grant Barrett, lexicographer, project editor of Oxford's Historical Dictionary of American Slang and a vice-president of the American Dialect Society, makes clear in his blog that he disagrees fundamentally with Mr Cassidy's ideas.
Asperand Rick McLaughlin told me about this word. When many years ago I wrote about the varied names used worldwide for the @ symbol that in English is formally called commercial at, this one didn't feature. There are many references to it online, the earliest being a posting on misc.writing on 31 December 1996 in which Jerry Kindall notes he recently heard the word. A rare sighting in print is in Grammar with a Global Perspective by F Melrose Davis, in which the alternative ampersat is also given. That's very slightly older: Tim Gowens was recorded as suggesting it in February 1996 in the Independent, a British newspaper, as a blend of ampersand and at. Asperand might also be a type of blend, from asterisk and ampersand, but that's a guess. Neither word, despite appearing in at least one dictionary of computing, shows any signs of becoming popular. They are mentioned, but are not used unselfconsciously as the name for the symbol, though Mr McLaughlin says he uses asperand.
4. Questions & Answers: Dude
[Q] From Robert W M Greaves: "I was taken aback to read the following in Jerome K Jerome's book Three Men in a Boat: 'Maidenhead itself is too snobby to be pleasant. It is the haunt of the river swell and his overdressed female companion. It is the town of showy hotels, patronised chiefly by dudes and ballet girls.' Just how long have dudes been with us?"
[A] Many people have come across references to dudes in connection with dude ranches, where urbanites could experience a sanitised version of Western life, and it is often assumed that this is the source of the term. However, dude ranch is relatively recent, with the first known examples being from 1921. The Oxford English Dictionary's first example of dude is from 1883. It's definitely an Americanism. So what was it doing, unremarked as a foreignism, in a British book as early as 1889?
The cause was an extraordinary craze or fashion identified by that name which erupted in New York and its neighbourhood in early 1883. On 25 February, the Brooklyn Eagle noted an addition to the language:
It is d-u-d-e or d-o-o-d, the spelling not having been distinctly settled yet. Nobody knows where the word came from, but it has sprung into popularity within the past two weeks, and everybody is using it... The word "dude" is a valuable addition to the slang of the day.
Earlier cases of dude are on record — the Historical Dictionary of American Slang takes it back to 1877 and there are examples of it as a personal name or nickname even before then. But it is clear from the article that these had made no impression on the American public.
A description of the dude, model for all that followed, appeared in the New York Evening Post early the following month:
A dude is a young man, not over twenty-five, who may be seen on Fifth Avenue between the hours of three and six, and may be recognized by the following distinguished marks and signs. He is dressed in clothes which are not calculated to attract much attention, because they are fashionable without being ostentatious. It is, in fact, only to the close observer that the completeness and care of the costume of the dude reveals itself. His trousers are very tight; his shirt-collar, which must be clerical in cut, encircles his neck so as to suggest that a sudden motion of the head in any direction will cause pain; he wears a tall black hat, pointed shoes, and a cane (not a "stick"), which should, we believe, properly have a silver handle, is carried by him under his right arm, (projecting forward at an acute angle, somewhat in the manner that a sword is carried by a general at a review, but with a civilian mildness that never suggests a military origin for the custom). When the dude takes off his hat, or when he is seen in the evening at the theatre, it appears that he parts his hair in the middle and "bangs" it. There is believed to be a difference of opinion among dudes as to whether they ought to wear white gaiters.
The article noted that dudes, unlike the mashers of the time and the dandies, fops and swells of earlier generations, set out to give an impression of protest against fashionable folly and of being instead serious-minded young men with missions in life: "A high-spirited, hilarious dude would be a contradiction in terms." But dudes were also widely reported as being vapid, with no ideas or conversation.
The Brooklyn Eagle fleshed out this portrait by noting that a dude was as a rule a rich man's son, was effeminate, aped the English, had as "his badge of office the paper cigarette and a bull-crown English opera hat", was noted for his love of actresses (to the extent of carrying on scandalous "affairs") but with no knowledge of the theatre.
In June, the Daily Northwestern reported that dudes had taken to wearing corsets, "in order to more fully develop and expose the beauties of the human form divine". The Richwood Gazette of Ohio argued in July that the dude was useful "as an example of how big a fool can be made in the semblance of a man"; the Prince Albert Times of Saskatchewan noted the same month that "The dude is one of those creatures which are perfectly harmless and are a necessary evil to civilization." The Manitoba Daily Free Press reported the story, "bearing evident marks of reportorial invention", that a dude was seen being chased up Fifth Avenue, by a cat.
You will note that dude was a term of ridicule, not approval. The geographical spread of the references shows that the whole of North America was variously intrigued and disgusted by the spread of the dude phenomenon in the cities of the East Coast. The Atlanta Constitution wrote in June, "So great a success the dude has had here in the United States, most every newspaper in the country has written editorials on him and brought him before the public in such manner as to create comment, if not surprise." News of him crossed the Atlantic very quickly. In fact, the OED's first example of the word is from The Graphic, a popular illustrated paper of London. Its report in March 1883 reads as if it were cribbed from the New York Evening Post: "The one object for which the dude exists is to tone down the eccentricities of fashion ... The silent, subfusc, subdued 'dude' hands down the traditions of good form."
Dude became widely known in the UK and it isn't surprising that Jerome K Jerome came across the term, as he was at the time an actor in London. Indeed, some American newspapers stated at the time that the term had been brought to New York from the London music halls and that this was the reason for the pronounced Anglophile streak in the fashion. But, so far as I know, nobody has found British examples that predate the US ones.
That leaves us without any direct leads to the source of dude. But it has been plausibly linked to the much older duds for clothes, which could in particular refer to ragged or tattered ones or even to rags (hence, at the very end of the nineteenth century, dud meaning something useless); dudman was an old term for a scarecrow. We may guess that dude was a sarcastic way to describe the foppish dress of these fashionable young men.
5. Questions & Answers: Malacia
[Q] From Shondra Tharp: "I was looking up the word malacia and noticed that it was not only "softening of organs or tissue" but also "a craving for spicy foods"? Are these two meanings related in some way?"
[A] The origin of both senses is Greek malakos, soft, a relative of malakia; the Oxford English Dictionary says this meant "softness, homosexual desire, sickness", a splendid demonstration of how much cultural bias you can build into four words.
We borrowed malacia in the seventeenth century from the Latin version of the Greek word. The Oxford English Dictionary says that in Latin this meant a disorder of the stomach, especially the sickness and nausea that was suffered by pregnant women, but early writers in English took it to mean a craving for unnatural or unusual foods, a different symptom of pregnancy. Your second sense grew up only in the late nineteenth century and it would seem that in this case medical writers took the word directly from Greek, creating terms such as osteomalacia (softening of the bones) and gastromalacia (a softening of the lining of the stomach).
Incidentally, the combining form malaco- is also derived from the first of your meanings: it appears in malacoderm, used in zoology for an animal having a soft outer protective layer, as well as in a few other technical terms. Just to keep us all on our toes, malaco-, via another sense of the Greek original, can also refer to molluscs, as in malacology, their study.
6. Sic!
• "Several years ago," recalls Chaya Galai, "in a large Moscow hotel that was still showing signs of its Soviet origins, I encountered a heart-warming sign in the shabby and depressing lobby: 'This is the Hotel Moscow and you are welcome to it!' The hotel has since been torn down."
• Paul Witheridge was in a car behind this truck in heavy rain on the Trans-Canada Highway in western Ontario and spotted the notice. Hands up all those who think the drivers could do a better job than Messrs Bush and Harper.
• The premier of New South Wales, Morris Iemma, spoke on ABC TV on 1 November about the report of an enquiry into the operation of the Sydney Harbour ferry service. He assured viewers that "This is the roadmap for a better ferry service". Allan Dean wonders if this means that the vessels will be rendered amphibious.
• Dorothy Anstice sent me a report from The Globe and Mail, Toronto, of 29 October: "Councillor Michael Thompson ... urged his fellow councillors, in going over the city budget, to 'corral all of these sacred cows and put them under the microscope.'"


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- November 17, 2012
- 4:29 p.m.
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moonshinegrrl writes:
I feel so sorry for this family. Too bad Channon or Chris wasn't armed. After this horrible crime my son and I got our permits, we shoot weekly and we both know to do everything possible not to go to the second crime scene.
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GIVE THIS SEASONfrom Eyewitness News Online Make Sure Children Have A Special Christmas By Giving To "Tower Of Toys" Reported by: Jeff Morris Web Producer: Jeff Morris Reported: Dec. 5, 2012 8:55 AM EST
, Kanawha County
, West Virginia
Hearing laughter and seeing the excited faces of children opening presents at Christmas warms the heart. But in some area homes, there will be no presents to open. You can help change that by participating in the "Tower of Toys." This annual effort by Eyewitness News, community organizations, businesses and residents is a toy drive for Union Mission, so the agency can distribute toys throughout the area before Christmas to needy children. Participating is simple. Just drop off a new unwrapped toy at the station's studios in Charleston, 1301 Piedmont Road, or in Huntington, 1002 Fourth Ave. Donations also can be made at the Building and Remodeling Warehouse in Nitro. Other partners include Off Broadway Shoes and the Kanawha Valley Corvette Club. Give a gift that really will make you feel good and bring joy to a child who does not have much to smile about. But you must act quickly; our toy drive wraps up Dec. 14. Also, there is a chance to make a donation while doing something healthy. Runners and walkers participating in the first Winter Series Walks/Runs on Sunday, Dec. 9, in Charleston are being asked to donate a new unwrapped toy when they come to the events. All toys will go to the "Tower of Toys" project. Registration for the 1 p.m. 3,000-meter walk (1.8 miles) and the 2 p.m. 5,000-meter run (3.1 miles) is at Charleston Area Medical Center Memorial Hospital. The walk and run start at 31st Street and Virginia Avenue. For more information or to obtain a registration form, visit http://tallmantrackclub.com/winter_series.htm. So please come help us build a huge "Tower of Toys" that will put smiles on the faces of lots of really deserving kids this Christmas. MORE NEWS FROM EYEWITNESS NEWS
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Biltmore Estate Fall Festival
Posted on Aug 15 2012 in Events by admin
11th Annual Fall Homeschool
Festival at the Biltmore
An HEAV-Sponsored Event!
Location: Biltmore Estate, 1 Approach Road, Asheville, North Carolina
Date: Thursday, September 20, 2012, from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., and Friday, September 21, from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.
Cost: $22/person ages 5 and up for first day; free for children 4 and under. Families who want to return the second day may upgrade for an additional $10.
Registration: Pre-registration is helpful. Make reservations by calling 866-851-4661, toll-free.
Information: http://www.biltmore.com/groups/education/programs/home_school.asp.
Accomodations: The Biltmore Estate partners with several local hotels to bring special rates on hotel rooms. Download the information here.
Description: Get to know the Vanderbilts—how they lived, traveled, and entertained—and what their contribution was to their community and state!
- Find out about train travel 100 years ago on the Vanderbilts' private railroad car.
- Learn about travel by steamship and how ships sent messages .
- Create your own coded message.
- Play lawn and parlor games.
- Join our old-fashioned sing-along.
- Make a fancy folding fan and collect pieces for a scrapbook page.
- Learn about early photography and cameras.
- Create an art project using solar photographic paper.
- Hear about some of the costume parties at Biltmore and make your own fancy mask.
- Dress in finery from the costume trunk.
From Richmond, Virginia
Follow I-95 south to I-85S at Petersburg. Take I-85 south into North Carolina and then follow I-40 west to Asheville. Take Exit 50B (US Highway 25N). After exiting, stay in the left lane and follow signs to the Biltmore entrance. Driving time: approximately 6 hours.
From Roanoke, Virginia
Follow I-81 south into Tennessee to Exit 57 (I-26E), and take scenic I-26 east through Johnson City to Asheville. In Asheville, follow I-240 east to I-40W. Follow I- 40 west to Exit 50B (US Highway 25N). After exiting, stay in the left lane and follow signs to the Biltmore entrance. Driving time: approximately 4 hours.
Additional Information: As this is an outdoor event, please dress appropriately for all weather possibilities. Picnic lunches are welcome.
For more information, visit http://www.biltmore.com/groups/education/programs/home_school.asp


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Welcome to Faith For Today!
Faith For Today is a television ministry committed to sharing God's grace with the world through broadcast media. That's been our vision since 1950, when Faith For Today launched its live inspirational television drama on ABC from New York City. That was more than 60 years ago, and we are now the oldest religious television broadcast in the world!
Today, Faith For Today produces a family of programs, including Lifestyle Magazine, The Evidence, Faith For Today, and McDougall, MD, and we've expanded to include Internet ministry, live seminars, a mobile device channel, and community concert events as well.
Please take a moment to browse around this site and see what we have to offer. And feel free to drop us a note or give us a call. We'd love to hear from you. Thanks for visiting!
Latest Updates
Call on Faith
Download our App Now! Do you need encouragement? Something to lift your spirits?
Faith Moments Blog
One of the most publicized events of the last decade was the execution of a Texas woman who had been convicted of murdering two people 14 years... More
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En Mel Vizhundha (Tamil Cover)
Song: En Mel Vizhundha Movie: May Maadham (1994) Music: A R Rahman Lyrics:...
Deva Kanyaka Surya Thamburu (Malayalam Cover)
Movie: Ee Puzhayum Kadannu (1997) Music: Johnson Lyrics: Gireesh Puthencher...
Kurukku Chiruthavale (Tamil Cover with NVK sir)
Movie: Mudhalvan (1999) Singers: Hariharan, Mahalakshmi Iyer Music Director...
Poovurangi (Malayalam Original)
Song : Poovurangi Sung by : Rashmi Nair Music/Composing : "Unnikrishnan K B...
Jaadu Hai Nasha Hai (Hindi Cover)
Movie: Jism (2003) Music: MM Kreem Lyrics: Sayeed Quadri, Neelesh Misra Si...
Subscribe to Rashmi 's music by RSS or iTunes. You can also Embed this Playlist
About Rashmi
I am from Kerala. I was born in Mumbai, lived and did my schooling in Chennai, went to college in Pune, now temporarily based in Milwaukee, WI USA
I love to sing. It's my passion. Except heavy metal, I can listen to any kind of music. My other interests are Photography, Travel, Food & Movies.
You can visit my blog
Joined on November 27, 2007 and posted 2019 comments, 24 replies and started 1 discussionsMusical Instruments
Recording Software: Cool Edit Pro ver 2.1
Recording Interface: M-Audio Firewire Solo
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Dressed up or down, our Brigitte Blouse is a wardrobe classic that adds a bit of boyish style to any ensemble. Made of soft stretch poplin, this easy silhouette is outlined with contrasting yellow piping along its collar, placket and cuffs, and features epaulettes and camp-style sleeves that can be left long or rolled with a tab closure. Menswear-inspired, but tailored — choose your regular size for a snug fit, or size up for a more relaxed feel. The ultimate utilitarian shirt is actually just that: it's the most useful, versatile essential. Wear it with cropped white pants and loafers for a tomboy pairing, or opt for our wheat-printed short to really let the trim pop.
Style Number: 11131196
Style Number: 11131196
Soft stretch poplin.
Gold button front.
Utility chest pockets with button detail.
Yellow corded piping.
Button tab closure at sleeves.
Button detail at shoulder epaulets and cuffs.
Straight fit.
25" (63.5cm) in length.
68% cotton, 28% nylon, 4% spandex.
Piping: 93% silk, 7% spandex.
Dry clean only.
As seen in the March issue of Harper's Bazaar.


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text: aboutshopideaslocalbloghelp my accountcart Size 8 (5.0 mm) [506] in Addi Turbo Lace 40" from Skacel Home » Shop » Needles & Hooks » Addi Turbo » Addi Turbo Lace 40" » Size 8 (5.0 mm) [506] $$15.95 http://www.theloopyewe.com/asset/catalog-entry-photo/e73f340a-6c8f-0123-a4e1-7c21968287bb~v2-600x600.jpg Size 8 (5.0 mm) [506] in Addi Turbo Lace 40" from Skacel http://www.theloopyewe.com/shop/p/FFF2C1DA-Addi-Turbo-Lace-40-Size-8-5-0-mm-506?ref=amazon-universal-wishlist In Stock for $15.95 Add to Cart Add to Wishlist Tweet Pin it Share The fast needle with the natural smooth touch. Soft cord with smooth transfer and no snag. The turbo finish brass tips will not rust! We currently have 6 sets in stock and available — we first started selling this in June 2009. More To See Addi Turbo Lace 40" Customer Photos Inspiration from others. Suggestions Patterns and similar items. Products


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Then check out these articles:
10 free Drupal modules that make development easier
If you're using Drupal to develop and administer your website, these add-ons can help.
Computerworld - When it comes to open-source content management systems, Drupal really stands apart from Joomla and WordPress, its closest competitors, for several reasons.
The payoff for using Drupal is the development of very tightly configured sites that perform well and scale excellently. This is why many developers are willing to put up with its idiosyncrasies.
However, because it's built around nodes that hold content of various types, working with Drupal is not for the timid. Still, it would be nice if some things were a little less complicated. Enter modules.
Unlike most Joomla modules and plug-ins, Drupal modules are simple in form, and iterative in approach. There are no big, all-inclusive mega-modules in this list. In Drupal, that's what really makes a module a popular favorite: Easing the burden of administering Drupal.
So here are 10 add-ons that I've tried and that you may find useful:
- Backup and Migrate
- Context
- Custom Contextual Links
- Delta
- Display Suite
- Field group
- Media
- Menu block
- Views
- Workbench
None of these modules is going to win any glamor awards. But in terms of ease of use and making Drupal a better CMS, they're all winners.
Backup and Migrate
If there's one thing every website developer needs, no matter what content management system is being used, it's the capability to quickly and easily back up the site so it can be restored or moved.
Why Drupal doesn't have this capacity in its core tools is beyond me. But Backup and Migrate is a module you can add on your own. So add it, already.
It's a pretty uncomplicated module to use. You can either fire off a backup immediately, or set up a scheduled backup at your convenience.
I ran through a test backup and then restored the site on a clean server with a bare Drupal 7 installation; the process ran flawlessly and speedily. This was a marked difference from a similar module on the Joomla CMS I recently looked at, which needed another add-on to perform a restore.
With the scheduling options that are built in, there should be no excuse to ever lose your site.
While many pages on a website are meant to be uniform in how they are displayed, there are some pages that should have their own look and feel. The home page, for instance, nearly always looks different from a standard content page.
In the past, Drupal admins would have to use the different options available within each Drupal theme to set the appearance of a special page. What Context does is enable admins to define contexts for a site and manage how and when these contexts control the look of different parts of the site.
A better way of conceptualizing this might be thinking of a context as a "section" of your site, which is how the project maintainers describe it. For each context, you can choose the conditions that trigger this context to be active and choose different aspects of Drupal that should react to this active context.
Setting up a context in the Context module is not exactly something that leaps out at you. Once you get the hang of it, though, the usefulness of this module becomes clear.
I like this module for what it brings: A powerful way to set page appearance without going deep into Drupal's theme-management tools.
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