The Indian sanitary pad revolutionary - <AUTHOR> http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-26260978 <comment><USER3> I want to hug this guy. Like, really. Buy me a airplane ticket.

Arunachalam Muruganantham is a hero. I use that word in its full magnitude. Since I am now an expert on the matter, having read the _entire_ article, I'll speculate on what motivates this man:

\- Grit. Crazy amounts of grit. The article is full of good quotes, but my favorite is what he said after being abandoned by his mother:

 _" It was a problem for me," he says. "I had to cook my own food."_

\- Humility combined with hunger:

 _" Luckily I'm not educated," he tells students. "If you act like an illiterate man, your learning will never stop... Being uneducated, you have no fear of the future."_

 _" Every time he comes to know something new, he wants to know everything about it," [his wife] says._

\- Love of humanity, on some level at least:

 _" Anyone with an MBA would immediately accumulate the maximum money. But I did not want to. Why? Because from childhood I know no human being died because of poverty - everything happens because of ignorance."_

As an aside, I LOVE the picture of his wife and daughter toward the end. This one photograph lends better context to the story than all the others combined. I know a single picture means nothing, but the look in his daughter's eyes makes me think she'll inherit something of her dad's baddassness.

And as another aside, bloody god-damn fucking hell, are the following bits really true?

 _There are still many taboos around menstruation in India. Women can 't visit temples or public places, they're not allowed to cook or touch the water supply - essentially they are considered untouchable._

 _There are also myths and fears surrounding the use of sanitary pads - <USER2> women who use them will go blind, for example, or will never get married._

<comment><USER4> _There are still many taboos around menstruation in India. Women can 't visit temples or public places, they're not allowed to cook or touch the water supply - essentially they are considered untouchable._

Every religion has elaborate rules to oppress woman. FYI, the Hebrew Bible has all the same stuff. (So I read in _The Year of Living Biblically_.)

It's a question of "how literally does society obey those rules?" Will Americans who use the Bible to justify their bigotry against gay people ... also agree to lock up Sarah Palin for five days/month? Not so far.

<comment><USER3> Thank you, quite right. The ongoing fight by (a slowly shrinking segment of) American society to continue blatant persecution of gay people is one of our most shameful failings. And I agree, the Church (big C) is largely responsible.

<comment><USER5> > _blatant persecution of gay people_ //

There is an active agenda attempting to legally force people to alter their actions to match others beliefs, "persecution" you might call it. Except it's not against those who have sex outside marriage it's against Christians - people who claim to uphold liberty of conscience simply will not allow Christians to express their views on marriage.

Marriage, in Christian terms and historically, is about creating community cohesion in order to provide a firm foundation on which to support the upbringing of children.

No matter how you legally alter the definition of marriage homosexual sexual union doesn't produce children.

All sexual activity outside of marriage is considered sinful within orthodox Christianity based on New Testament exegesis.

Christianity [generally] thus considers that homosexual sex is sinful in the same way as adultery or other pre- or extra-marital sexual activity.

Because you disagree with this analysis and it's foundational axioms doesn't mean you're being persecuted - whether you're an adulterer, a sexual idolater or whatever. It is sinful, you may peacefully respond to that however you like.

FWIW purity laws, ritual uncleanliness, sacrifices and such all ended with the New Covenant. It's a corollary to the very fundamentals of Christian theology; if you don't understand it then you probably have never read the NT and probably have no idea what Christianity is about.

<comment><USER3> Persecution occurs when someone is not allowed to visit their dying spouse in a hospital because they are of the "wrong" gender.

Persecution occurs when the spouse dies, and her partner is deprived of any part of her estate.

Persecution occurs when we bestow a host of tax benefits upon married couples, but only if they are of the "correct" genders.

Persecution occurs when gay couples are denied corporate health insurance benefits automatically conferred to straight couples.

And persecution occurs when bigots justify these things by saying that gay couples don't "produce children".

Thank you for illustrating my point so vividly.

</comment></comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER6> I'm a female founder in the US with a startup that has to do with menstruation, and I cannot even begin to tell you how uncomfortable people (male and female) get when I talk with them about it. For a man in India (where this topic is exponentially more taboo) to undertake a business like this and persist despite the backlash is so incredibly inspiring. The benefit of his business goes so far beyond simply reducing napkin prices...he's helping to break down taboos that exist in India (and across the globe), and giving women opportunities (not to mention more knowledge and confidence about their bodies) that they never would have had otherwise.

Absolutely amazing.

<comment><USER7> Very cool! I use cycle for this which only does averaging, which works okay but it's seriously old and clonky. I was wondering why someone hadn't done this already.

<comment><USER6> Yes...there are plenty of old and clunky apps out there for this =)

We're hoping to change that. I really want this space to become something that men and women, alike, will talk about. Good UI and UX has been missing, and women definitely deserve better.

<comment><USER8> If your company can put out an Android app that can do everything Ovuview Pro can do and include Google Calendar integration (if I want to share my cycle calendar with my S/O), I'd switch immediately.

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER9> This is an amazingly inspiring story, I love the entrepreneurial spirit and dedication of Mr Muruganantham.

However, there is a bigger story hiding behind this personal triumph. It's clear that people living in impoverished areas are not in a position to buy sanitary products at market rates (being sold at a margin of 4000% or more). But for example many do have access to cheap raw materials. It makes a ton of sense to simply make that stuff locally for a fraction of the cost, and with that comes a much greater independence for those poor regions. Let's hope that in time this becomes a trend that expands to many industries.

<comment><USER10> The article mentions that commercial napkins sold for 4 rupees despite cotton being 1/4000th the cost, but also says farther down that the locally produced ones sell for an average of 2.5 rupees each. That's a 38% discount: significant, but it doesn't seem like a game-changing difference to me. I imagine that if this catches on, the larger manufacturers will likely just cut their margins to compete.

On a more general note, one of the big reasons for the Industrial Revolution's switch to mass-production was that making goods in huge factories is more efficient, and ultimately cheaper, than producing them locally in small quantities. Economies of scale are powerful.

<comment><USER11> The 2.5 stayed local and made jobs. Its a huge difference. In essence, he gave the locals "permission" to produce these things for themselves.

Wealth disparity is an interesting animal. The rich don't consume 1000's of times more resources than the poor despite having 1000's of times more 'money'. The wealth divide seems to function like an insidious form control wherein the uber-rich are able to deny local markets permission to do things for themselves.

Its great to see when guys like this realize its all just made of paper (literally and figuratively in this case) and they can actually just do it for themselves.

<comment><USER12> As demonstrated by this article, the uber-rich are not able to deny local markets permission to do things for themselves. The uber-rich simply failed to figure out how to market pads themselves. If Ambani had figured out the marketing, this would just be another story of Reliance incrementally moving into another industry and making a bunch of money.

Trying to paint the uber-rich as some sort of villain here is silly.

The really interesting thing is that this is an example of the value of marketing.

<comment><USER11> Yeah, it doesn't sound quite right yet to me either. There's no overt mustache-twirling villainy going on here. Its more like a emergent artifact of the system.

Its just interesting to observe a depressed area where everyone is in want, but no one has a "job" to do. The baker can't deliver bread because his truck is broken and then mechanic has no bread so he can't work on trucks. Why? Because neither of them has any "money". Therein is the problem.

</comment></comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER13> As an Indian, I can see what pain this guy went through. Fighting the society to build a start up like this, with this kind of taboo attached to the product? All the best trying to build a start up at the first place. You are almost treated like you are doing it because you absolutely are incapable of doing anything else.

And having the gumption to fight years of laughter, isolation, mockery and ridicule to only chase what you believe in is a very different thing than just building a company. You are fighting forces that you would do anything to see you fail. And this is beyond the merit of your product.

I salute this guy for not just what he has achieved. Though the margins he achieved will be eventually matched by bigger companies.

In many ways this is like the first man climbing the Everest or first space agency going to the moon. Others have been there after the first attempt. But the people who do it first, face significant obstacles. And they inspire all of us.

<comment><USER14> Yeah but I made an app to send your friends links with one less click!

<comment><USER15> Pshaw. I'm releasing an app tomorrow that sends your friends links unless you click. It takes -1 clicks to send a link, so I'm calling it the -1ink.

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER16> > He believes that big business is parasitic, like a mosquito, whereas he > prefers the lighter touch, like that of a butterfly. "A butterfly can suck > honey from the flower without damaging it," he says.

What a profound and inspiring worldview.

<comment><USER17> Indeed. Here's another one :

"Luckily I'm not educated," he tells students. "If you act like an illiterate man, your learning will never stop... Being uneducated, you have no fear of the future."

<comment><USER18> "If you get rich, you have an apartment with an extra bedroom - and then you die."

"I've accumulated no money but I accumulate a lot of happiness."

-Arunachalam Muruganantham

<comment><USER19> That was my favourite too.

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER20> What a classic Hero's Journey story- man encounters difficulty experienced by his loved one, tries to solve her problem efficiently, loses her in the process, becomes an outcast, persists, finds meaning in his work, receives help, is humble, helps people at an epic scale, reunites with his wife, happy ending, better world, triumph over ignorance and hardship.

<comment><USER21> You may also find this real-life story inspiring ...

[http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dashrath_Manjhi](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dashrath_Manjhi)

One man's epic struggle against the landscape, to not let others suffer as he did.

<comment><USER22> That was amazing. Thank you for sharing that.

<comment><USER20> I also know of another guy who planted an entire forest: [http://www.treehugger.com/natural-sciences/indian-man-who- pl...](http://www.treehugger.com/natural-sciences/indian-man-who- planted-1360-acre-forest-now-plans-plant-another.html)

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER23> While pursuing his entrepreneurial dream, he walked around asking women for their used sanitary pads (while most men struggle to ask for a date), almost gets tied to a tree when a witch doctor incites the local villagers against him, has his wife leave him (only to come back after his success), and even his mother abandoned him; still he goes on.

And then, even after having practically everyone around him ostracize and abandon him, he doesn't go for the money, but remains humble and does the best he can to make the world a better place.

<comment><USER24> she did not return because of his success, she returned because he was no longer bringing shame upon his family. As the article mentions, there many taboos in their society, there is the caste system that provides separation (even tint of skin can) and of course separation of sexes. So his single minded pursuit made life untenable for her where they lived, it even drove off his own mother. You did note that she merely went back to her mom, she didn't run off with another man. Essentially, she was waiting till he either gave up the pursuit or succeeded, I am quite sure they would be together regardless.

Hell there is odd separation in the states amongst some of the workers from that country. You can see it in the groupings, who has lunch together, those who walk apart or turn down a hall when meeting

<comment><USER25> >> the caste system that provides separation (even tint of skin can)

are you suggesting that caste system is related to skin color?

<comment><USER24> No. I am saying there are many levels of separation of society in India, very similar to how separation exists in other cultures. However many Western nations prefer to highlight those faults in other countries and disclaim any such in their own.

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER26> Contrast this grass roots effort with OLPC, a grandiose plan to distribute One Laptop per Child to the third world. The best quip I ever read about that was: "OLPC is a rich man's idea of what poor men need. It's like donating an expresso machine to a homeless shelter."

Instead, as the article makes clear, many poor villages don't even have ready access to clean water. This one humble guy has done more good for more people in India than 1000 grandiose schemes such as OLPC. And he wants to expand to 106 countries. I wish him well.

<comment><USER27> It's not a competition.

Also, does your quipper think that women aren't important? I always find it amusing when people wax philosophical about equality whilst retreating into sexist terminology to do so. Instead of 'poor men', 'the poor' or 'poor people' works to the same effect.

<comment><USER28> OLPC was created by a man (hence 'rich man'), and rich man/poor man is a more powerful literary device than rich man/the poor.

<comment><USER27> I'm aware of all that. I didn't say boo to 'rich man', because it is driven by Negroponte. I recognized the literary device with 'wax philosophical'. It's still someone trying to play the oneupmanship game on equality while at the same time perpetuating sexism. It's a shitty thing to do to merely 'sound cool' \- selling out ideals for demagoguery.

English is a wonderfully flexible language and there are a dozen different ways to say the same thing here. Hand-waving away the hypocrisy in that statement as being a more powerful (barely, at that) literary device is just being lazy.

I'd also counter that the proper literary device is 'rich man/poor mAn', not 'rich man/poor mEn'. A small but meaningful difference.

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER29> I like this article a lot.

Similar problem was in communist Czechoslovakia. There was only one factory making hygiene products for entire country, but it burned down on second year of 5 year plan. Central planning committee could not be arsed to change the plan...

</comment><comment><USER30> You have to hear him talk ...

[http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_sta...](http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_started_a_sanitary_napkin_revolution)

He is so full of energy and his straight talk will win your heart ... What a person ... cheers ..

</comment><comment><USER31> Here's a link to his very inspiring TED Talk: [http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_sta...](http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_started_a_sanitary_napkin_revolution)

<comment><USER32> Jesus. Why does TED has to go and spoil every fucking good thing?

<comment><USER33> I believe TED is not about presenting tech as a "savior."

I believe TED is a sandbox for a number of powerful people to work out their interpersonal arguments about whether tech is good for the world or not. As such you will hear all presentations subtly presented in this light without the participants (presenters nor audience members) being aware. It's essentially a gladiatorial arena funded by the well-to-do, cleverly disguised as another "gee whiz" tech conference.

As such, stories and material are distorted toward arguing the spectral ends of the conference creators.

This is why there are so many stories presented that "make tech look silly, bad or overextended." They're placements by forces within the internal TED conflict that are trying to diminish public opinion about the benefits of technological practice.

Make no mistake- these people are happy to see TED come off as foolish or ruinous, b/c it supports their contingent's goals. They have founded TED with the intention of presenting foolish ideas to tarnish the concept of technology as a practice.

So, the age old advice applies here - take everything with a grain of salt. When you hear a presentation, get what you can out of it, realize it's not the full picture and seek out the missing pieces. Do not rely on TED for a coherent or complete picture of anything. It's just an artifact of debating idealogues.

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER17> Those who aren't from the Subcontinent may not fully appreciate this man's achievement.

I'm very impressed by his dedication, perseverance and inspiring outlook on life.

</comment><comment><USER34> There's a lot to this article. See how the distributed form of production really works, and these sanitary pad machines really aren't that different from open source software. See how they change the world and again, the distributed ownership and small business approach does it.

And additionally, why it is never a good idea to underestimate someone because of a lack of formal education.

</comment><comment><USER35> If you are as inspired by this story as I was, you can mail him here: firstname.lastname@example.com

(His email address is public on his company's site [1])

[1] [http://newinventions.in/contactus.aspx](http://newinventions.in/contactus.aspx)

</comment><comment><USER36> "If you get rich, you have an apartment with an extra bedroom - and then you die."

Something to think about.

</comment><comment><USER37> I'm so glad this made it to HN. From an Indian societal perspective, what he achieved is just marvellous and outstanding! It takes tremendous courage and determination to do something like this in India! Salute to this man!

</comment><comment><USER38> "Luckily I'm not educated," he tells students. "If you act like an illiterate man, your learning will never stop... Being uneducated, you have no fear of the future."

Love this quote!

</comment><comment><USER39> So after all that he managed to lower the price from £0.04 to £0.025 ... is that a meaningful reduction?

<comment><USER40> I wonder if that was 4 rupees in 1998, vs 2.5 rupees now? According to an online inflation calculator, 1 rupee in 1998 is worth 4 rupees now, so the difference would be more like 16:2.5.

Perhaps someone could check an online Indian Amazon equivalent, not that such a place would be available to rural women anyway, but it would give a lower baseline.

<comment><USER41> Branded pads retail range Rupees 10-25 per pad - some variation in capacity. So the contemporary ratio ranges from 4:1 to 10:1. So 16:2.5 is good estimate even for contemporary comparison!

@pja you are hereby awarded 1 Fermi (see recent link on the topic of Fermi estimates).

The saving is significant because one can also buy shampoo in sachets that cost Rs.5, so the savings expand access to a range of basic hygiene products.

<comment><USER40> _@pja you are hereby awarded 1 Fermi (see recent link on the topic of Fermi estimates)._

I shall wear it with pride!

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER42> I have read a lot on the subject of how civil rights and the rule of law allowed the emergence of the Industrial Revolution, and this story reminds of that earlier epoch. As late as the 1670s, England was still burning witches (male and female) at the stake, to punish them for their witchcraft. But then Newton publishes Philosophiæ Naturalis Principia Mathematica in 1687, the Glorious Revolution of 1688 brings in a new regime, the English Bill of Rights of 1689 ensures everyone a trial if they are accused, everyone has civil rights, and suddenly, among the legal and intellectual elites, it becomes widely understood that witchcraft does not actually exist, everything can be explained by science, and people doing weird stuff need to have their civil rights protected. And by the early 1700s men like Jethro Tull and Charles Townsend kick off the Agricultural Revolution, doing weird stuff like feeding turnips to cows and collecting all the manure -- spooky weird stuff that might have gotten them accused of witchcraft just 30 years earlier.

And this story reminds of that earlier epoch. When you bring in real innovation (innovation that touches upon people's profoundest taboo's and fears) you either have civil rights, or you end up dead. And it does say something hopeful about India that this man knew his basic civil rights were going to protect him from accusations of witchcraft. Though, of course, this part suggests that India could still improve its protections quite a bit:

"Worse was to come. The villagers became convinced he was possessed by evil spirits, and were about to chain him upside down to a tree to be "healed" by the local soothsayer. He only narrowly avoided this treatment by agreeing to leave the village. It was a terrible price to pay. "My wife gone, my mum gone, ostracised by my village" he says. "I was left all alone in life.""

</comment><comment><USER43> "He fashioned a sanitary pad out of cotton and gave it to Shanthi, demanding immediate feedback. She said he'd have to wait for some time - only then did he realise that periods were monthly. 'I can't wait a month for each feedback, it'll take two decades!'"

Sounds like he got a pretty solid biology lesson along the way.

<comment><USER44> That quote emphasised to me how dangerous ignorance is and how important education is in this world.

</comment></comment><comment><USER45> I am from north India and agree that menstruation is still taboo in our culture (mostly in villages). -During menstruation cycle women (mostly married) sleep in separate room, they are not supposed to touch anything and after 4 days all the clothes/bedding they wear/use (even mattress) will be washed. -Most of these rules are tied to religion. -I think when these "rules" were started there were no sanitary pads, so may be this was done for hygiene sake, but today it doesn't make any sense. And I think in those days if someone wanted people to follow anything just say its required by your religion and people will blindly follow. -This guy is doing really great work, happy that BBC picked it up.

<comment><USER46> I'm a bit tired of most of the taboos/problems of India being "mostly in villages". My entire family are city dwellers and every time there is an commercial for sanitary napkins on TV, the women have an expression of embarrassment and can't wait for it to get over (whereas scenes of violence from the movies are received perfectly fine).

</comment></comment><comment><USER47> The next time someone complains about how hard startups are, show them this. Until you've walked around with a soccer ball full of goat's blood in your pants, after your wife and mother have abandoned you, you have nothing to complain about.

<comment><USER48> "Until you've walked around with a soccer ball full of goat's blood in your pants, after your wife and mother have abandoned you, you have nothing to complain about."

Ha, awesome!

</comment></comment><comment><USER49> I really enjoyed this story and remember first hearing about him a few years ago. Truly inspiring man.

It makes me wonder, how many other people are out there who have the same passion for something, but haven't had any success? Only a select few will have success, most will fail. I think we should celebrate the people who took risks and failed too. But sadly you won't find articles written about them as it isn't a happy ending like this one.

</comment><comment><USER50> While this man seems amazing and has done a great thing for a lot of women, it's a shame that the main problem still remains. Menstruation is still taboo, both in the west and in India. It would be nice if instead of importing the western method of dealing with it (using sanitary pads to dispose of our menstrual blood secretly and in the process creating mountains of rubbish - where do all the blood-stained "sanitary" napkins go?) the women could just wash their cloth pads and dry them in the sun. It seems quite terrible environmentally.

I'm a woman and grew up using disposable menstrual products. I only started using reusable ones when I was thirty because I have endometriosis that causes heavy bleeding (so I have to use postpartum type pads) and it weighed on my mind to be throwing them out all the time. Now I feel terrible about all those years. I don't need to wash them in hot water because it's sunny where I live. But I hide the bucket that I soak them in and I hang them out when my husband is not at home so he doesn't have to see them. Thankfully, I don't have to be so secretive about our baby's nappies.

</comment><comment><USER51> OT: I liked how the article was written.

</comment><comment><USER52> He deserves some sort of Nobel prize.

</comment><comment><USER53> He truly belongs to the breed that Apple's 'Think Different' commercial describes:

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SswMzUWOiJg](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SswMzUWOiJg)

Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do. \- Apple Inc. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Think_Different](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Think_Different)

</comment><comment><USER54> > "You always have a girl in white jeans, jumping over a wall," he says. "They > never talk about hygiene."

Look's like the marketing folks at P&G were selling this stuff to the mostly affluent. Therefore, I am guessing they never bothered to sell the hygiene angle.

</comment><comment><USER55> I see a lot of comments discussing the cost. I do not think cost (or profits) were the driver. Surely higher cost make it difficult for poor to acquire the pads but the taboo is a much bigger hurdle to cross, which this gentleman has amazingly addressed.

</comment><comment><USER56> Or you just get menstruation cups? Might be a bit more expensive initially but cheaper longterm and a lot more environmentally friendly. [http://www.ruby- cup.com/en/](http://www.ruby-cup.com/en/)

<comment><USER57> I know two women who have tried those. In both cases they tried for several months to get used to them, but they gave up eventually because they're so unpleasant to use, and it never gets any easier. Apparently.

<comment><USER58> There are women who find that menstrual cups aren't for them, but in my experience, they tend to be the exception. Using one myself, and having turned many of my friends onto them, they're generally hailed as the greatest thing ever invented around here. Not to say theres anything wrong with your friends, because everyone likes what they likes, just wanted to throw my own experience.

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER59> He has given a ted talk in bangalore

[http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_sta...](http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_started_a_sanitary_napkin_revolution)

</comment><comment><USER60> It is even better hearing the story from him straight [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4_MeS6SOwk](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4_MeS6SOwk)

</comment><comment><USER61> The optimal technical solution to this problem, for the vast majority of the population, is menstrual cups. They are completely reusable and generally perform better.

To me the long term challenge is the social problem of convincing people that menstrual cups are not gross and are not going to hurt them.

I totally respect this guy for finding an intermediate solution that helps his community though. I don't live in India so I have no idea what the specific cultural challenges are.

<comment><USER62> Don't know about that. From talking with my wife they are very messy and need to be cleaned a lot or they smell, like boiled every day or two - so that's why there are disposable ones and they are more popular. Also you need a lot of clean tissues each time you insert, rinse, and replace it - which brings you right back to the using dirty rags again cause there is stigma to clean and dry them properly in those cultures. Anyway her ob/gyn told her to stop using them when she got a IUD, and that's another issue with them.

<comment><USER61> It sounds like your wife is the kind of person who wants her body to be completely free of any sort of body smells and doesn't want to come in contact with any kind of body fluids. Those are exactly what I was referring to when I said there is cultural resistance. My community are "pro-natural" and don't have issue with the smell, nor do they use tissues. They just use their hands and believe that vaginas and menstrual fluid have scents and that it's ok. It's just cultural differences.

<comment><USER62> Erik, please do not make assumptions about my wife, she is far less bothered by ick than me or many people I know. Smell can be caused by bacteria, can be different than scent you refer to, and bacteria are a real concern so to clean the cup well and to have clean hands and area there are in fact very important. She used cup for years (due to heavy flow - cup easily contains more than tampon/pad absorbs well in practice - a pro of cup), then after we had all our children she had IUD for contraceptive and at that point her ob/gyn said the two are not supposed to be used in concert, so she stopped using cup. The IUD also lessened her flows so the reason for using the cup for her was removed as well. I thought I was completely polite and simply listed some reasons why a cup may not be appropriate in India where just washing and drying rags well in comparison is a concern according to the BBC article.

</comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER63> "If you get rich, you have an apartment with an extra bedroom - and then you die."

Crap, I don't think I've read anything that has hit me harder.

</comment><comment><USER64> > He believes that big business is parasitic, like a mosquito, whereas he > prefers the lighter touch, like that of a butterfly. "A butterfly can suck > honey from the flower without damaging it," he says.

While I don't believe that big business is necessarily parasitic, I _love_ this metaphor.

</comment><comment><USER65> The main problem is inhumane inequality. All of these "developing nations" are poor because they are oppressed and excluded by the financial powers. "Developing nation" is a racist term that attempts to cover economic neglect and oppression.

</comment><comment><USER66> There is another initiative that is approaching the problem from a different lens. Its called Menstrupedia (www.menstrupedia.com).

They are making an educational book in comic book format to dispel the massive amounts of myths around the topic.

</comment><comment><USER67> [http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_sta...](http://www.ted.com/talks/arunachalam_muruganantham_how_i_started_a_sanitary_napkin_revolution)

</comment><comment><USER68> This is something that makes me both proud and sad about my home country India. We are still struggling with some of the basic problems that the developed world probably solved 100 years back. It makes me even more sad that just 60 years back India was hardly behind any other developed country.

Arunchalam's example is also a classic case of how Indian government has destroyed India's entrepreneurial zeal. When Arun introduced his cheap sanitary pad making machine, Indian government woke up and see an opportunity to gain votes of poor and goodwill of large companies.

Indian government came up with a scheme where poor women will get a "fixed" quota per month of sanitary pads paid for by tax payers.

\--- Ministry of Health and Family Welfare (MHFW) is set to embark upon an ambitious programme, reports The Hindu on 21st February 2010, to reach about 200 million women with 100 sanitary pads per person per annum with a budget of some INR 20 billion in next 3 to 6 months.

\-- [Source: One of the email threads I was exchanging on this matter with a friend in government]

This is another Indian government scam where big companies like Johnson and Johnson etc. will provide these pads at taxpayers cost to the poor women while politicians will take their cut. Going by past experience even the pads wont reach the women.

Those who might be aware of India's economic history, it is full of such scams. Indian government often ran government sponsored health campaigns claiming things like

\- "Wash your hands with soap after and before having food and going to toilet else it will will cause diseases."

\- "Use iodized salt in food else your children will be born retarded".

\- "Use toothbrush and toothpaste"

The reality is, even in rural areas the level of hygiene is way better. People used handmade soaps and herbal alternatives for soap. (Even I used them in my childhood). During my childhood oral hygiene involved brushing teeth with 5 different types of leaves, gargling with hot water mixed with a mixture of 15 different kind of powders which were comprised of different kind of tree skins, herbs and roots. My father still knows the formula and I used it successfully when I developed a gum related infection.

And you know what? Indians used plenty of sea salt in their food. We ate salted fish, Salted Pickles and what not.

Today it so happens that all these small scale industries are already dead. Not because they failed to innovate or compete on price. (In reality some companies like Vico succeeded with these traditional products) They failed because government actively tried to kill them in the name of public welfare.

Today I am buying a Colegate toothpaste which claims to contain "sea salt". The TV ad of this toothpaste shows a grandpa showing his grandson that his teeth are stronger at 80 purely because he used sea salt to brush his teeth in past. There are other companies out there which are selling toothpastes claiming to contain the exact same herbs that we used in past (Miswaak, Babool etc.)

When I visit Target and Wallmart I often see shelves full of crudely packaged soaps titled "Handmade Soap" selling at 3x the price of normal soap.

I feel sad for Arunachalam and many other people I know who are mad just like him because rest of us Indian citizens have failed to make a political choice which would have heralded these men as heroes.

Unsolicited Advice to Americans: I see American government taking same direction as that of Indian government in past and present. Pushing private interests of few in the name of poor. Buying votes by redistribution of wealth while wrecking incentives to be innovative. I might be wrong. But there is no cost to being cautious.

<comment><USER69> Though the government is pretty corrupt, you seem to be paranoid in your criticism of it.

> "Use iodized salt in food else your children will be born retarded".

"In India, the entire population is prone to IDD due to deficiency of iodine in the soil of the subcontinent and consequently the food derived from it. To combat the risk of IDD, salt is fortified with iodine. However, an estimated 350 million people do not consume adequately iodized salt and, therefore, are at risk for IDD. Of the 325 districts surveyed in India so far, 263 are IDD- endemic."[1]

> People used handmade soaps and herbal alternatives for soap.

Handmade soaps are fine. The ads never said you should only use big-brand soaps. Just because it's called "herbal alternative", it does not mean that it is effective. Each family or each region has its own "herbal alternative". Are you saying that they are all as effective as soap?

> 5 different types of leaves, gargling with hot water mixed with a mixture of > 15 different kind of powders

I have visited villages for various reasons. Most people I came across used one of three methods: neem twigs, salt, charcoal ash. Neem has some antimicrobial properties, but those who cleaned with salt were ruining their teeth. I doubt that ash benefited their oral hygiene. I dare say these villagers are better off with modern products.

> The reality is, even in rural areas the level of hygiene is way better.

Better than what? If you're comparing villages to urban slums, sure. Are you forgetting that in villages, most people crap out in the open? And don't using soap afterwards? And did you read this article about women not using sanitary pads?

[1]: [http://www.icmr.nic.in/ijmr/2013/september/0922.pdf](http://www.icmr.nic.in/ijmr/2013/september/0922.pdf)

<comment><USER70> And specifically, sea salt tends to be low in Iodine.

"Iodine, an element essential for human health, is present only in small amounts in sea salt,[1]" (cribbed from Wikipedia)

[1]: [http://pubs.acs.org/doi/full/10.1021/es0719071](http://pubs.acs.org/doi/full/10.1021/es0719071)

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER71> [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_T7qzufEI9U](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_T7qzufEI9U) I think this is his best speech, straight from heart.

</comment><comment><USER72> Thanks for the link. We think it is difficult to see from the point of view of our users. This guy proved quite the contrary. One of the best stories I've ever read here.

</comment><comment><USER73> That's a LOT of determination. I'm amazed by his courage. There must be more to the story that was left out. Salute to the gentleman. A godsend.

</comment><comment><USER74> Favorite business advice "quote"? / paraphrase.

Be like a butterfly, taking some nectar but not damaging the flower. Not not like the mosquito, a parasite.

</comment><comment><USER75> Is money a bottleneck to getting more of these machines out? If so, what charity would someone donate to?

</comment><comment><USER76> Pg - is there a new comment filtering system?

An article on sanitary napkins, and no immature rag jokes? Is this really HN?

:)

</comment><comment><USER77> > "A butterfly can suck honey from the flower without damaging it"

</comment><comment><USER78> Why buy disposable pads when you can use rags and wash them? Same for diapers.

<comment><USER19> It says so in the article. Women felt shame leaving them out to dry since the subject is so taboo.

<comment><USER79> I'd also imagine regular washing such rags in overcrowded areas with an absence of infrastructure can cause issues - as would it be in places where people (mainly women) need to spend a significant amount of the day just to get hold of water.

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER80> So the trick is: lie to existing manufacturers to get the schematics, build simplified/more manual machines, use really cheap labors, and probably lower the profit margin? Reminds me of knockoff products but then it's probably a phase that developing countries go through.

<comment><USER32> No. The real trick is to puke at such comments.

</comment></comment><comment><USER81> Here come the patent holders...

</comment><comment><USER82> This is an amazing story!

</comment><comment><USER83> this guy is awesome

</comment><comment><USER84> Two thumbs up for this guy!

</comment><comment><USER85> What a bloody mess !</comment>


Fox News Violates Poland's Holocaust Law with Reference to "Polish Death Camp" - <AUTHOR> https://theintercept.com/2018/08/21/fox-news-violates-polands-holocaust-law-reference-polish-death-camp/ <comment><USER2> I am not a legal expert by any means, but Fox news is not based in Poland and does not broadcast in Poland. What kind of legal trouble can they realistically get into from this?</comment>


Literate Theorem Proving with Org (and Proof General) - <AUTHOR> https://chame.co/writeups/org_coq/post.html <comment><USER2> I really like the typographical choices here, the website really looks like printed paper and it's a joy to read.

Sadly, the displaying does not fit mobile screens correctly and I have to scroll back and forth on the horizontal axis... @chameco, cyou should fix it imho: the design of the webpage is otherwise really really good!</comment>


Show HN: Usage AI: We reduce your AWS bill by 45% - <AUTHOR> Hello Hacker News Community,
My name's Kaveh, the founder of Usage AI. I've been spending my lockdown time working on Usage AI - a platform that analyses and automatically finds savings. We recently helped an Amazon-backed company find a 47% reduction on their AWS bill (email me for the case study).
We're in beta and are selecting a few good customers to launch pilots with. If you're looking to test our platform and find savings, you can email me at email@example.com or by visiting our website.
Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
https://www.usage.ai/ <comment><AUTHOR> Hey everyone, Kaveh here. I founded Usage AI. Prior to Usage AI, I worked as a software engineer at early stage startups, a medium-sized 1200 person company, and as a lead software engineer at a large F500 company.

Looking forward to answering your questions!</comment>


Dirk's Lego Globe (2013) - <AUTHOR> http://mocpages.com/moc.php/353076 <comment><USER2> "To get all the bricks required, I posted 23 individual orders on Bricklink. I won't tell you about the total costs – my wife could read this ;)."

</comment><comment><USER3> Here is another one also from 2013 by Kohsuke of Jenkins/Hudson fame: [http://kohsuke.org/2013/08/13/lego-earth- project/](http://kohsuke.org/2013/08/13/lego-earth-project/)

</comment><comment><USER4> Impressive project, I always loved Lego. One of the best moments with my step son is creating something out of Lego's and see the sparkle in his eyes. I remember building massive ships and aircrafts when I was a child, no amount of video games can beat this feeling of control and unlimited possibilities.

<comment><USER5> Have you tried Kerbal Space Program?

[https://kerbalspaceprogram.com/](https://kerbalspaceprogram.com/)

You're welcome! ;)

</comment></comment><comment><USER6> Can't people easily make a CAD model of a LEGO creation, and end up with a single SKU you can click to order, and get a printed instructional manual and everything? I thought I'd seen that was possible.

And how much would this thing cost?

<comment><USER7> Lego used to offer something like that inside their Lego Digital Designer application. You create your model, press a button (sort of), and you'd get a nice box with all the pieces and instructions in the mail. Unfortunately, they've discontinued the service. I don't know why.

<comment><USER8> Part of the retooling process of the brand that occurred to make it. Leading up to this, Lego was coming out of a slump and trying to identify how to streamline the number of bricks, product offerings, and generate solid revenue streams.

Also, a person on brickset suggested it may be sorting costs from manual labor. [1]

[1] [http://brickset.com/article/1705](http://brickset.com/article/1705)

</comment></comment></comment><comment> bjelkeman-again Now we have proof that the centre of the earth has Death Star-like pillar structures and what looks like a power core.

</comment><comment><USER9> Impressive not only in that it looks nice, but engineered well enough to withstand playtime with a toddler. :)</comment>


Intel SSD DC P3700 (NVMe PCIe SSD) Review - <AUTHOR> http://www.anandtech.com/show/8104/intel-ssd-dc-p3700-review-the-pcie-ssd-transition-begins-with-nvme

<comment><USER2> In addition to the review, provides a great picture of the future of SSDs, and a thorough explanation of why SATA and AHCI weren't sustainable choices given the low latency of SSDs.</comment>


Apple provides discount for MacBook Pro peripherals and dongles - <AUTHOR> https://techcrunch.com/2016/11/04/apple-provides-a-softer-landing-for-macbook-pro-buyers-with-deep-discounts-on-peripherals-and-dongles/?ncid=rss&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+Techcrunch+%28TechCrunch%29&utm_content=FaceBook&sr_share=facebook <comment><USER2> What a distraction.

The dongles are annoying, but they aren't the real problem.

The problem is the hardware, it is underpowered and under equipped.</comment>


Adding Data to a Database Table in ASP.NET - <AUTHOR> http://v4.dbtutorials.com/asp-net/adding-data-to-a-database-table-in-asp-net/ In this tutorial we will cover adding data to a pre-existing database table. <comment><USER2> <http://news.ycombinator.com/submitted?id=v4dbtutorials>

Seems to be another bot.</comment>


Web scraping in 2018 – forget HTML, use XHRs, metadata or JavaScript variables - <AUTHOR> https://medium.com/@jakubbalada/web-scraping-in-2018-forget-html-use-xhrs-metadata-or-javascript-variables-8167f252439c <comment><USER2> might consider live-regions [https://developer.mozilla.org/en- US/docs/Web/Accessibility/A...](https://developer.mozilla.org/en- US/docs/Web/Accessibility/ARIA/ARIA_Live_Regions) although not so much for adding structure, but catching extra data.</comment>


Russia's Next Invasion Won't Be an Ex-Soviet State. It Will Be Sweden or Finland - <AUTHOR> https://foreignpolicy.com/2019/03/15/russias-next-land-grab-wont-be-in-an-ex-soviet-state-it-will-be-in-europe-putin-saakashvili-sweden-finland-arctic-northern-sea-route-baltics-nato/ <comment><USER2> That would be surreal, I hope it doesn't come to that.

Oddly enough there was a Norwegian show on Amazon about this exact scenario. I enjoyed it, wish it had more seasons.

[https://www.amazon.com/Occupied/dp/B01G7MC67O](https://www.amazon.com/Occupied/dp/B01G7MC67O)

</comment><comment><USER3> If for some reason a majority of citizens in those countries vote to join Russia, then sure why not.</comment>


Ask HN: Parents of HN, what are your best sources for evidence-based parenting? - <AUTHOR> I am having my first child a few months from now, and am looking for all sorts of perspectives. I am told things will never be the way I picture it in my head anyway, so there's no use in preparing. But still, it'd be nice to have some clue about what we know and what we don't. <comment><USER2> Beware the risk of looking for evidence-based parenting advice: it tends to focus on effects that are measurable and small. It's unethical to research parenting strategies with large effects. So you'll find lots of studies about what kind of music stimulates developing brains, but you won't find a recent, randomized controlled trial that says whether it's bad to constantly fight in front of the kids. (It is, I assert without evidence.)

So don't lose sight of the basics, like ensuring secure attachment.

<comment><AUTHOR> Definitely a good point. My trouble in filtering out the small nonsense from the actually meaningful stuff is part of the reason I wanted to ask this in the first place.

</comment></comment><comment><USER3> There's some chapters on emotional development in the book emotional intelligence that's a summary of social sciences.

It's about nurturing empathy and socializing behaviour. There's also some materials on how to counter natural anxiety (new foods/new people/new experiences) by forcing controlled exposure.

From my own experience having a child with my wife (an engineer as well) reading up on all the materials. Having and maintaining a trust-bond with your child is the most important, especially when you realize there is lots of bad advice out there related to baby sleep.

Essentially, the first 6 months your baby is too "stupid" to cry for nothing but basic needs like:

1/ too warm

2/ too cold

3/ hungry

4/ thirsty

5/ tired (need sleep)

6/ oversensitive (too much light/noise)

7/ wet diapers

8/ pain (sickness/teething/diaper rash)

Afterwards she/he can start to get into habits like waking up for some breastmilk while it's possible to go without. But babies are pretty flexible and can adopt a new routine within 3 days of enforcing that routine.

<comment><USER4> I really like this advice, we'd often get frustrated with the crying and remind ourselves to "go through the checklist" and more often than not it was one of the basic needs you mentioned that needed attending to.

<comment><USER5> I found that the cries were very quickly pretty distinct about what was the source of the problem. Even 3 month olds communicate if you listen.

<comment><AUTHOR> This thread repeats advice I've heard a few times before, but in a good way. It definitely sounds like the type of advice that bears repetition.

<comment><USER6> Your comment history suggests you are a bot ?

</comment></comment></comment></comment></comment><comment><USER7> I'm currently reading Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool by Emily Oster.

It tackles the common questions involving infants and toddlers through analysis of research in those areas.

<comment><USER8> Even as a non-parent her work is fascinating. I really enjoyed her interview on the Ezra Klein podcast ([https://www.vox.com/ezra-klein-show- podcast](https://www.vox.com/ezra-klein-show-podcast))

<comment><USER9> In case anyone else has trouble finding the podcast episode in question this should be a direct link - [https://megaphone.link/VMP1678725500](https://megaphone.link/VMP1678725500)

</comment></comment></comment><comment><USER10> One book I recommend is "How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen, and How to Listen So Your Kids Will Talk". Beyond this and some others, one thing I would not get overly hung up on is "evidence based". I say that because you're not raising an average of all children; you're raising an individual child who may (or may not) be an outlier in all kinds of different respects.

<comment><USER11> This book is dated but excellent. It basically teaches us to have empathy for our child's state of mind and feelings. This empathy is hard to generate sometimes but I've found it to be the most effective way to parent. Ironically this is true of all human interaction: empathy is hard but is so powerful.

</comment></comment><comment><USER12> I have a 14-month-old now and my wife and I read a ton of articles on raising children and how to best teach them, talk to them etc.

What I have realized in the past 14 months is that, at least during this first year, every problem you'll encounter (which there is a LOT) is going to be about physical things, not "how to raise your children", and boy were we vastly under-prepared. There's your usual hungry/too warm/too cold/wet diaper stuff. Then there's stuff that comes up like diaper rash, eczema, constipation / digestive system development, colic, teething pain... and a long list of more things that could happen but I don't know about because it didn't happen to our baby but just as likely to happen to any other baby.

My advice would be, read more about those. You can worry about how to raise your children later. My advice to friends who have had babies after us is that, you usually see the cute baby pictures on FB and read articles about how to raise your children; but what no one tells you is that 95% of your life in those first months is about feeding your baby, changing diapers, trying (and failing) to put baby to sleep, washing bottles (if bottle fed). But then again, what do I know, I have a 14-month-old, so maybe I'm wrong and I'll bang my head on the wall when she's 7 years old. :)

</comment><comment><USER13> This is an Australian site but it's an evidence based, government funded initiative for new and upcoming parents like yourself: [https://raisingchildren.net.au/](https://raisingchildren.net.au/)

As a recently new father myself I've found it incredibly valuable. There's so much noise out there and it's great to have a solid starting point which you can then branch out from if you need to.

<comment><AUTHOR> That looks like a good and useful initiative. Will take a look!

</comment></comment><comment><USER14> Congratulations!!

I got 21 months old and I read/skimmed through pretty much everything popular and did almost everything by books. Sometimes, I followed advices in the books and got different results, it made me feel a bit of failure. Of course, I understand that every child is different and parenting science is in infancy right now. But at some subconscious level, maybe I thought parenting is like programming and one can easily control output with their code.

So be careful putting too much faith in these book even if they are evidence- based. At same time, I am surprised to see so many people recommending against reading up on parenting. Sure you will learn a lot of things from your parents and some of things that you will read in books might be common sense, but there will many new things you will learn. And some of common sense ideas are not even correct.

These books/blogs helped me being better father & husband, and also helped me deal with a lot of stress. "Let them Eat Dirt" helped me relax about being dirty.

"Brain Rules for Babies" helped me relax about not trying to teach my son all the time.

"What to Expect First Year" had a lot of useful tips. I didn't know that one should not microwave in plastic containers. And definitely don't microwave milk.

</comment><comment><USER15> God, I only wish that my parenting could have been evidence-based. We found that there was so much variation between our two kids that it was hard to apply practice from one to the next. Forcing a consistent routine helped us get into through-the-night sleeping relatively quickly for both of them, but that's about all I can think of.

<comment><USER16> My parents tried evidence-based parenting on me. Granted it was 50 years ago, but whatever the science seemed to be saying at the time... In the end, they abandoned the idea completely for my brother as the evidence they collected with me appeared to support the theory that their previous attempt was completely misguided ;-)

Parenting is hard.

</comment></comment><comment><USER17> We read lots of books, but the most useful thing we got by word of mouth. "Elimination communication" basically you teach baby to poop when you hold them over the toilet or sink. You can sing a little pooping song or make grunting noises as a queue. This eliminates diaper rash and is much easier to clean up then a poopy diaper. It also makes potty training easier when you get there down the line. You can start very early, 1 month old is fine.

</comment><comment><USER18> There isn't anything macro, people are too complex. As a parent you are just one variable, one influence. Plenty of people will say otherwise and give you advice whether you want it or not. Some of it will be good advice.

My advice is to pay attention to your child, ensure they know that they're loved, imbue them with a love of learning and teach them to be resilient.

The details are for you and your child to figure out but in my view reading together is key to a lot of good.

</comment><comment><USER19> I have three kids: 4,6, and 8. We read a lot of books when our oldest was born...and learned that most advice is not based on much. Each of our kids is very different, stratiges that worked well with one failed completely with another. We have consistently adapted our approach with a focus on maintaining trust and teaching our "family rule" to be kind to yourself and others. It's hard work.

</comment><comment><USER20> I don't buy into most parenting books, but after we accidentally taught our first to need her hand held for an hour to fall asleep, we realized we needed to do something different for the second.

My wife read a book by Ferber and it changed everything. I met a lot of people who said they tried Ferber and it didn't work, but none who actually read the book and did what it said.

</comment><comment><USER21> I would recommend that you and your partner read Bringing Up Bébé. The chapter on sleep cycles will be a godsend.

The sooner you can get the baby sleeping through the night, the better you will be.

Also, be careful around 6 month age with new foods. There are way too many food allergies these days. I was just in the ER last night for a food related allergy.

<comment><AUTHOR> > Also, be careful around 6 month age with new foods. There are way too many > food allergies these days. I was just in the ER last night for a food > related allergy.

This is something I've been borrning about a lot, because my wife has a very serious sesame allergy.

But what's confusing is that some allergies might be prevented with exposure, and some seem to be caused by it. Either way, caution is useful, of course.

</comment></comment><comment><USER22> I'm a few months ahead of you -- I have a 3 week old daughter.

I don't have much to add at the moment, except to expect a constant barrage of (often unsolicited) advice from well-meaning family and friends. I'm learning to take everything with a grain of salt and approach new advice with an experimental mindset.

<comment><AUTHOR> Hah, yes. And strangers, I suspect! (Based on experience of having dogs, where strangers are surprisingly enthusiastic about telling me about everything I'm doing wrong.)

</comment></comment><comment><USER23> The other comments seem spot on: Emily Oster books, a checklist (amazing how quickly they leave your mind when stressed by crying), and the knowledge that parenting doesn't actually matter for much in the first few years past making sure the kid gets enough food and sleep.

</comment><comment><USER24> There is a ton of conflicting advice. We're currently using Ferber and happy with it. But there's so much variance among kids, so you can't rely blindly on _any_ method.

You just need to gather evidence from your own kid (n=1) by being attentive, responsive and malleable.

</comment><comment><USER25> I recommend reading "The Wonder Weeks", a book about different developmental phases infants go through - with some caveats. It has helped us immeasurably to understand what their little minds and bodies are going through as they grow into their next developmental phase. Check it out, it's worth a read and is based on scientific research, though not without controversy, so take it all with a grain of salt. Personally / anecdotally, we have found fussiness has lined up perfectly with the jumps in our first child, while it's about two weeks early in our second child.

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wonder_Weeks](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wonder_Weeks)

</comment><comment><USER26> Hard data:

\- Everybody will tell you what to do.

\- Even more, they believe they are right everytime.

\- You'll spend a lot of time in ER (or something like that) because you don't know what's going on and how to troubleshoot a baby. When in doubt, go ASAP or you'll end going back home at 5am.

\- You'll be tired of doctors asking you if it is your first son. Fact is when the second one has fever, you give him/her medicine _and_ pospone.

\- If you're wondering if you'll be able to do it well, you will (that's a symptom of someone who cares).

It is _very_ important that the mother has enough rest, at least the first 3-4 months. Some people talk about post-labor depression: it is not depression, just the mother is more exhausted than she has ever been in her life.

</comment><comment><USER27> "The Whole Brain Child" is an excellent primer on how children's brains work and behaviors are exhibited, and from researchers in this area. I'm now listening to the follow-up "No-Drama Discipline", and hoping it will provide even more practical advice in this area.

"How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen, and How to Listen So Your Kids Will Talk" is also good.

"Parenting From The Inside Out" is a gut punch about getting your own psychological problems addressed first.

I'll also say that prioritizing sleep (as best as you can), proper diet, exercise, and healthy boundaries between work/home are sometimes so much more important than any book you could be reading.

</comment><comment><USER28> Humans are too diverse for an evidence-based "always do X, never do Y". You're more likely to get "X worked out better 70% of the time" \- which means with 70% of the kids. Well, 30% of the time, that won't work out well _with your kid_.

So take advice (evidence based, if available). But if it's not working with your child, then it's not. (Your kid will almost certainly differ from the "best advice" on _something_.) When that happens, try something else, no matter how "expert" or "evidence-based" the recommendation was.

</comment><comment><USER29> I have two essential books:

1) [https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Whisperer-Solves-Your- Problems/d...](https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Whisperer-Solves-Your- Problems/dp/0743488946)

Good sleep habits should be the #1 priority with a newborn (to the extent you can do anything about it).

2) Peaceful Parents Happy Kids [https://www.ahaparenting.com](https://www.ahaparenting.com)

When kids get older (toddler and up) this book is very evidence based, and is very helpful for dealing with relationship conflicts.

</comment><comment><USER30> I've recently found the work of Alfie Kohn and his books (Unconditional Parenting, Punished by Rewards - these I've read) it's heavily evidence-based (lot's of cited research).

It challenges the status-quo but I really enjoy his perspective.

The books aren't really about dealing with very small babies , but you might enjoy his teachings.

There's a DVD (about 2 hour long) "Unconditional Parenting" which is a great summary of the book with the same name.

Best of luck in that adventure!

</comment><comment><USER31> My wife and I listened to and got a lot out of the Great Course "Scientific Secrets for Raising Kids who Thrive". He cites studies for all his tips, and is very careful about recommending only things that have been thoroughly researched, with replication.

[https://www.amazon.com/Scientific-Secrets-Raising-Kids- Thriv...](https://www.amazon.com/Scientific-Secrets-Raising-Kids- Thrive/dp/B00IUBJC4G)

</comment><comment><USER32> I'd recommend the book NurtureShock ([https://www.amazon.com/NurtureShock-New- Thinking-About-Child...](https://www.amazon.com/NurtureShock-New-Thinking- About-Children/dp/0446504130))

It has great chapters on sleep, race, praise and most interesting of all, how the ways in which our efforts to become perfect parents can backfire.

</comment><comment><USER33> If you haven't a chance to check out www.parenttv.com it's great!! It has literally brought together the leading parenting experts from all over the world into the one place and personalises to the age of your child 0-17 years old and walk you through their development and what you need to know broken down into categories ... it's awesome!

</comment><comment><USER34> I think this is more difficult than it sounds. Kid A is very different from kid B. I've found that things that 'work' with my kids don't work on other kids.

Along these lines, I thought this book was interesting: The Gardener and the Carpenter: What the New Science of Child Development Tells Us About the Relationship Between Parents and Children

</comment><comment><USER35> Most of the good stuff is designed for early childhood professionals, not parents. Parent stuff tends to be plausible sounding nonsense. It's when you have a group of a dozen kids in a preschool that you need stuff that works. Compare levels of order the versus at home. It's a bit of work to adopt but not too much.

</comment><comment><USER36> I really haven't found anything that I trust.

A lot of anecdotal stuff and strange testing kinda stuff.

There's SO MUCH NOISE when it comes to parenting information.

The best advice I have is to just pay attention to your child and figure out what works for them the best you can. Every kid is really different.

</comment><comment><USER37> Read a book on child development Read a book on early childhood education. Read about attachment.

You yourself should go to therapy to better understand yourself. A lot of people parent as a reflection of their adult needs and their childhood experiences. And congratulations!

</comment><comment> a-saleh I never really used any.

In your place, now I would work to have community that feels familiar. Maybe you are lucky and you have your close-family living nearby and you have good relationship and good boundaries, that is a real asset.

We didn't. Having friends with small children saved me.

</comment><comment><USER38> I enjoyed "Parenting without Power Struggles" and "All Joy and No Fun". The former nails how to have a real relationship with your child, the latter talks about the issues with modern parenting.

</comment><comment><USER39> _Selfish Reasons to have More Kids._

The TLDR is, relax: your parenting doesn't matter as much as you probably think.

<comment><AUTHOR> This seems to be a recurring theme. I get the impression it's very hard to screw up so bad it would be statistically repeatable.

</comment></comment><comment><USER40> I wouldn't recommend any.

You should try common sense.

</comment><comment><USER41> related: [https://slatestarcodex.com/2018/11/06/preschool-i-was- wrong/](https://slatestarcodex.com/2018/11/06/preschool-i-was-wrong/)

<comment><AUTHOR> This is a blog I've read and enjoyed before. Thanks for the link; will take a look!</comment></comment>