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Estonia, commonly misspelled as Stonia, e-Stonia, Elbonia, Estoina, Iceland, I'm stoned or Australia, is the most important country in South-East-Western Afrasia, being recognized by those with brains as the world's number one superpower because of its enormous army and cultural influence in the world, its colony Bolanga, and, last and definitely the least, because of its infamous shashlyk (also known as Eesti Nokia). Notice that while the present article may contain some typographical errors, the yet-to-be-written article called The Truth about Estonia is completely wrong and presents a misleadingly hyper-superlative picture of the country. Estonians mostly are without brains, but there are somu who could by it at Elion( sounds like something very bad=.
|Official language
|Talaponian , Russian dialect
|Capital (administrative)
|Capital (prostitutive)
|Ethnic groups
|White Estonians, black russians
|Edgar Savisaar
|King's advisor
|Mart Laar
|Vice President
|Anu Saagim and/or Homer Simpson, assuming they're not one and the same
|Estonian Cocoon (EEC)
|National anthem
|Wipe your feet on the way in (similar to France or something like that)
This logo (also called "Estonian Nokia") was made by the best Estonian designer (some liars say he's the only one but that's not completely true). It is heard to have cost more than 19,000,000 EEC. It reads: "Come on to Estonia, you must not!". The slogan also demonstrates that the word "Estonia" consists of two different words: "Est" and "Onia". Est means East and Onia=Onion, so Estonia should actually be called The Eastern Onion Country as Onion is, for Estonians, the synonym of vegetable.
Yes, the logo is freaky, but that's what makes it cool, or at least the above-mentioned designer thought so. Other people just think he was either way too high or way too crazy about Yoda, the Store Wars author. The slogan is often mistaken for Estonian flag. In fact, Estonia has no flag because nobody has an idea where to take another 19,000,000 EEC from.
Estonian language is the weirdest in the world. Most words have 4 vowels in a row, and at least one Ümläüẗ like "jäääär", "töööö", or "kuuuurïja". Some words can mean almost everything. For example, "tee" means (1) a road, (2) tea, and (3) do! (imperative mode). "Kurk" means (1) cucumber, (2) throat, and (3) the Devil. So when an estonian says:"Mu kurk valutab", you may think: "What the f..., your cucumber hurts?!"
All in all: the two main issues in Estonian language: no gender (he=she) and no future form, in other words NO SEX, NO FUTURE!!!
One of the things foreigners will notice about Estonian language is that Estonians are constantly talking about sex. Terviseks (a common toast which is sometimes translated as "for health" but which actually means "let's do it, you know what I mean"), Varastamiseks (to steal while having sex), Põletamiseks (to burn while having sex), Seksimiseks (to have sex while having sex) are just a few of the verbs that can be ended with the suffix "seks". This makes Estonians reluctant to engage in any sexual activities, sociologists speculate.
In Estonia, there are lots of dialects. Mostly know dialect is 'Ilmatsalu Murre'. They like to say 'Ära jõrise mees' (Don't maunder with me) and 'Määnselt laheda kiirendusega BMW, millel olid säänselt suured rattad' (With bad-ass acceleration BMW, what have very HUGE wheels). If you hear someone saying this type of sentences, then better avoid this people. They may harm you!
Contrary to their claims, most Estonians cannot really speak or write English correctly. This page is a bona fide example of English words written using good ol' Estonian grammar, also known as the phrase "fluent in English" in every Estonian CV.
Origins of Estonian
The story may or may not be copyrighted but it does have an author (although almost everyone here receives at least one copy a year by e-mail). See here. It's someone called Douglas Wells.
The real story behind why Estonian is the way it is. A long time ago, about 100 or 9100 AD, three Estonian guys were sitting around the campfire. Their names were Billy, Ray and Duke. They were bored.
Billy spoke first. "Ya know Ray, what we need is a new language".
"Damn right!" said Ray, "Talkin' this way is gettin' boring and besides, everybody almost understands us. We need a language that's soo crazy, soo complicated that nobody will ever understand what's going on!".
As the idea picked up steam, Duke piped up. "Lets do it this way, that you can't say he or she. That way you won't know if you're talkin' about a man or woman. Also, we gotta think up names for people that give no clue to foreigners about their gender, names that change with the grammar so you never know what to call somebody!"
Ray nodded in approval. "Yeah," he said thoughtfully, "that's it. Then we can eliminate the future tense. Think of trying to ask someone out on date when you can't say the right name, whether it's a boy or girl or when it is going to happen!"
Billy, the smart one, was thinking in more technical terms already. "OK, let's make it this way, that when you learn a noun, you don't have to learn just one word but 14. Yeah and instead of just saying that you are going to or from something, you have to change the noun in some weird way." Now Ray was excited and spilled his beer. "Yeah! And ... the nouns can't change the same way, let's make like, a hundred different spelling groups that all change in different ways!"
This appealed to Duke who added slyly, "Ya wanna make it real hard, a real nut-buster? Let's make it so all adjectives change, too. In boring old English, you say 'five small, red houses', 'small, red houses' and 'many small, red houses'. Small and red always stay the same but in our new language? Whoaaaa Nellie!"
Then they started practising how to say 'Oh, you're learning Estonian' without busting up laughing.
Myths and legends
All Estonians worship a pagan God called Tarapita, also called Taara (the same as empty beer bottles are called). Tarapita was born in the North-Eastern part of the Estonian mainland, in a holy grove on a hill, from where he flew to the A-Great-Egg-Hill-Island (see map), making a crash landing and leaving a huge crater in the ground, now filled with water and called Kaali järv (lake Kaali) - and this is no joke, folks! This God is famous for his fertility (see above under History) and scaring the shit out of the Christian God in the II Crusade by using his Lightning Strike combined with Poison Nova (lvl 65). Nowadays Estonians celebrate Taara by dancin' 'round da garbage on June 24 (John Smith's day).
Another famous mythological figure is Kalevipoeg from the only book written entirely in Estonian. Estonians are very proud of that book, and everyone who has read it can use public transport (which means the two-and-a-half tram lines in Tallinn) for free. It is a free translation of Joyce's Ulysses, yet some fantasy realms have been added by the Baltic-German doctor F.R.Kreutzwald. In this book you can find porn (a Swedish girl raped on an island), violent killing (stealing swords from Finland), smuggling (carrying wood over the lake of Peipsi) and limb fetish (some guy's hands and legs are cut off in the end). As Kalevipoeg didn't sell good in first years, pictures of naked people were added. By the way, Kalevipoeg is an excellent example of an average Estonian man. Nowadays it is the most popular book after Edgar Savisaar's "Peaminister. Eesti lähiajalugu 1990–1992", which has less naked people inside, but was written by an aviosexual frog of Pakistani origin. The latter book is commonly used at making buildings when short of bricks due to its enormous weight (more than 10 kilogrammes each) and its durability on extreme conditions. It is also worth mentioning that the whole Estonian family system is based on "Kalevipoeg". Namely, the main hero's name, "Kalevipoeg", translates as "Kalev's son". Kalevipoeg had three brothers: Sulevipoeg (Sulev's son), Olevipoeg (Olaf's son), Klaveripoeg (Piano's son, also known as Reinhold Rannap), and O'Boeg (O's Zon, told to have been conceived during an oral intercourse). It is common even nowadays that mothers name their sons after their respective fathers. If the father's name is not known, the son is given the name "Edgaripoeg" (Edgar's son). Edgar is a metasyntactic variable that is widely used among the Estonian Perl programmers.
The traditional Estonian cuisine consist of foods that have gone off or are just plain rotten. For example rotten cabbage (hapukapsas), rotten cucumbers (hapukurk), old sour porridge (kaerakile), milk gone off (hapupiim) especially when mixed with flour from different grains (no, I don't know either for what purpose), called kama.
Also all Estonians are obligated by law to consume the better part of a pig with every meal. Mostly Estonians eat those parts of animals that the previous rulers of the country threw out. Intestines, ears and tails dominate the cuisine. One of the most important dishes is blood, grains and pieces of fat in a bowel (verivorst). Every Estonian likes blood. Estonia is plenty of blood food. Even Mäkdonalds haves in Estonia bloodburger and big bloodburger. You can buy blood in supermarkets it is sold in small packages like juice. In Valga county people love blood festival which is running every day in club "Valga lihakombinaat".
Nowadays Estonians eat a variety of different foods, such as sand, Latvian pickle and chocolate from a chocolate monopoly "Kalev". Sand is very commonly eaten mostly in the south-western part of Estonia, mainly near sand factory called Pärnu. Sand being a national food goes back to ancient times, when Estonian tribes ruled the whole Sahara and Atacama deserts. It is said that they wanted to differ from locals and therefore begun eating sand. Latvian pickle is also an essential part of Estonian's every-day food. Estonians say that they eat Latvian pickles, because: 1. It is the only food sold on markets 2. It is cheap (5 Estonian Cocoons each). Contrary to the widespread belief, nobody actually eats kanahakkliha [1]. The main use of this product is to scare children to become vegetarians.
When not eating pickles or sand, Estonians eat chocolate from a chocolate company "Kalev", which some years ago was a sewer depository station. Reportedly it is under control of reptile aliens, who plant their eggs in the chocolate. Estonian chocolate consists of sand and pickles. A new taste revolution started in 2004, when "Kalev" began importing black people, hidden inside loads of coffee beans. Check article in Postimees
The primary national food is shaslyk and the only drink which people drink is called "Belyi Aist" or "Armenjak".
However, a true Estonian would never touch a dish if it is not made the exact way that mother in Saaremaa used to. Words to scare Estonians off food are "healthy", "spice" or "vegetable".
Religion and Cults
Striitreisser ( Street-racers in English) is a large group of men and women. They can usually be seen wearing blue uniforms, while patrolling the roads of Estonia, looking for prey. They don't leave any traces, just like the ninja. On a side note - the ninja are AWESOME!
Eurovision's Fanclub's Fanclub (they fan Eurovision's Fanclub). They are usually hostile, attacking young and promising Estonia's singers (like the band Ruffus), and should be avoided at all costs. This fan club holds it's rituals and traditional sacrifices in different places, but they can be primarily found lurking in their Hive (they call it The Nest) - Saku Suurhall.
Reip.ee'ers (users of reip.ee; ratefags in eng). They are the worst of all mentioned before. They love to take pictures of everyone every time everywhere and put them on reip.ee. Then they rate the pictures and write comments to them. Reibipeded spend most of the day in reip.ee (about 16 hours) so you won't be seeing much of them in the streets (that's good). But the youngers Reip.ee'ers spend their time in Viru Keskus (Viru Center in English) after school and Viru Keskus is also called as Reidipede Keskus. Reip.ee'ers usually run around screaming and destroying. Sometimes so much damage is done that the government has to reorganise the entire country. If you really want to die, go to www.rate.ee and put your pic in there and become a critic (person who rates only with "1"). Leave your full address, e-mail and phone number and your death is guaranteed. It's the quickest way to kill someone or commit suicide (use your own address).
Most Estonians never speak, they only make mumbling sounds like: "mmmmmm". The other common ways of face-to-face communication are spitting, farting, and step dance. Therefore, speaking is regarded as a high art among Estonians. Some Estonians (0,71% according to a recent census) do produce language-like sounds. As the Estonian language is extremely difficult to learn, not to say about mastering it, most of the locals don't care to acquire more than a few words (kurat, okei, tšau, pakaa). They usually use words borrowed from Russian, English or Swahili. The Russian part of the lexicon consists mainly of laconic describing sentences, such as: "Ты хуй" (=I love you but...). The English part of language is mainly used to show your emotions: "Fuck", "Bitch", "fkurslf" and many more. With these kind words, Estonians easily handle all types of situations. The Estonian language (see an above section) is still studied in a few Finnish and Hungarian universities because of its doubtful Oogry-Moogric roots.
Nothing is known about entomology in Estonia. Nobody even knows what this word means but it was requested by the Uncyclopedia staff that there be this heading. So be it.
A fuller treatment of the Estonian Literature is in a separate article; only the major issues are outlined here. As already mentioned, the only book written entirely in Estonian is Kalevipoeg. There are other books, however, which may be mentioned in this rubric but there are various foreign elements in their language. For example, "Lies and Unjustice" by H. A. Saaretamm (18 volumes) is an important novel and all Estonians who go to school are forced to read the first chapter and to memorize the first page ("There it lies, the Robbers' Hill..."). However, the author makes extensive use of foreign words (e.g., "revolutsioon" in vol. 12, or "sotsialismus" in vol. 9) and is thus alienated from the spirit of Estonian language. The "O spring of my childhood, I jump from joy" by O. Ogalik is a fine piece of poetry in prose, but the majority of the dialogues are in Russian. This is even reflected in the title of the book which in the original version reads as: "Prassai, Primavera!" Consequently, Ogalik should be considered a Russian rather than Estonian writer.
Main article: Geography of Estonia
Estonia is a place of many mysteries, legends and myths. Most of them deal with the exact location of the country.
The most popular myth, which is also taught in several schools, is that Estonia is located west of Tokyo, north of Setumaa, south of Santa's home and somewhere above the centre of the Earth (not quite sure), but this tale is officially disregarded as a typical sign of exhaustion from blogging.
Another story tells that Estonia is actually a bloody cold country covered with deep mud and greedy people who eat children, but this is largely unfounded because of the lack of the children who could testify to that.
However, it is known that the small town of Peedu in northern Estonia can get so cold it will freeze the knuckles off a penguin.
Through many researches and discussions the current view is the following: Estonia is a warm country with fantastic women in Southeast Earth. Legend goes that the women were imported from Russia, as a gift from Vladimir VII (7.) the Putin, current Russian Czar. Vladimir VII himself denies that, so it's been suggested that it's the other way around - all Russian women actually originate from Estonia.If there is one thing that all Estonians agree on is that all foreign maps and entries about Estonia in tourist guides, including Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy and The ultimate guide to going somewhere, are plain wrong.
Estonia consists of 25 states, 3 asteroids, 14 gas stations, about 15,000 toilets and 2 parallel dimensions. There is a border struggle with Fiji concerning the dimensions at the moment. The Population of Estonia is between 8 and 9 humans, 1.1 million Estonians and 300000 Russians (of which around 7 don't have a criminal record), that is why it is also called the "Most Crowded Country in the World". Beside humans (and Russians), there is also a huge amount of chickens and wild gorillas (about 5.9 billion) and Chikenogorillas.
Estonia has only 3 islands: Pepsi Island, A-Great-Egg-Hill-Island and Narva. Two of them are inhabited by Jews and there is no living nature in Narva. The Jews have been ruling the Pepsi Island and the A-Great-Egg-Hill-Island for 93 years now. Also the American islands and the Australian island are Estonian colonies where live several low-tech gangs (the locals).
The deepest lake of Estonia (AbjaPaluoja Mud lake) is also the deepest (depth 3.5 metres in the deepest point) lake of the Earth and also the rest of the world except India (as nobody really cares what Indians do in India).
Longest river of Estonia is Greenwich meridian, 39520 kilometres and 23 metres long. It might also be the longest river in the world, but since it's so long, nobody dares to swim in there.
Main article: Communication in Estonia
Estonia has probably the most alienated communication infrastructure in the world. 99% of the population has a computer with Internet connection. The remaining 1% are constantly drunk.
There are a number of organisations providing aliens access to the Internet:
- Starman - run by Martians as a test project. What is it testing and whether the company is really located in Estonia or in Megatexas instead we do not know.
- Elion - sponsored by the Grand Master of the Aliens, Lennart Meri and run by a bunch of former KGB agents as the sister project to Big Brother. A very dangerous company that keeps people in suspense. The wonderful web page Hot.ee belongs to Elion.
- STV (short for Sex Television) - not much is known about this organisation. There are rumours that it's lead by Dr. Evil, but currently there is no conclusive evidence to support this theory.
- Uninet - according to Estonia's most respected newspaper Nelli Teataja it's a social project created by ETV so they'd have a place where to ship script editors of Soft'n'Furry (a secret show on secret TV for secret services) when they start philosophisizing about the truth.
- EENet - this organisation only provides an Internet service for "educational purposes", which means that some Estonians are lucky enough to download porn at 1 Gbps.
- EWN - Located in Haapsalu, operated by Norby Telecom who is planing to kill Elion.
- toru.hot.ee - is main place for l33t warez junkies to trade some pr0n. The biggest pirate FTP server toru.hot.ee is maintained by the biggest ISP, Elion and has a 1 Gbit pipe. Thanks, Elion ;)
- MoonNetworks - the best ISP in Northern-Estonia. Group of Russians attacked Elion and stole their Internet cable. Great connections and great administrators.
- Ilmatsalu Highway Cable - the best ISP in Southern-Estonia. Group of Ilmatsalu [[gang] members attacked Starman and stole their Internet cable. Great connection and great administrators. Available download speed tops out at 3 bps.
There in Estonia is connected to Internet: 2 000 000 Cars (old little cars like toyota corollas (~81') and datsuns (~79') etc.), 1 500 000 cordless phones, 1 000 000 personal computers (mainli with based on 80386 and 80486 cpu, but some very rich peaople have eaven Pentium II based computers and mouse with scrolling wheel), 500 000 freezers, 200 000 animals (cats, sheep and dogs), 350 Banks or credit institutions, 15 State organizations
Rape.ee is a strange, disturbing phenomenon, it lies on the very edge of the Great Big Internet and lures teens with lots of zits and stupid hair near it, and then swallows them whole. People who have ever come near it and lived to tell the tale, said that they heard screams of young innocent souls yelling out: "Rape my picture! Rape MY picture or i put a curse on thee!! yarrrrrrrrr... ICE CREAM!"
This monster is lead by a demonic soul called Andrei, the curse that the Russian Czar Vlad VII(7) put on Estonia. There is only one single way to stop this monstrosity, yea, only one way to save those socially disturbed souls from the church of vanity, the answer lies in The Farm (also known as Eesti Nokia).
However, here's what an ordinary rape.ee'er thimks about this soul-saving project: Te olete peded muhahahahahahaha saite aru (untranslatable ruppissh in a language called Muhahaaish).
Cell phone
Every single Estonian has a cell phone, younger people usually have two or three and also a laptop computer. This is demanded by a law passed in 1992 by the Riigikogu. There is widespread resentment against this law among the people, who see it as a revenge action by Lennart Meri who couldn't run for president for the 3rd time. Lennart Meri himself has more then twenty different phone numbers and he's constantly talkong using at least three or four of them. Sometimes you must wait while. His dog called Mathias Rust have 5 mobile phones and 3 fix numbers (doghouse, seaport and sauna). It is easier call to Mathias and say hime - let Lennart takes phone.
The cellular market has been dominated by Tele2 (ex Q-GSM) as long as anyone can remember. TELE2 is using buses for transporting people to the net area. It is possible to use TELE2 cellular phones in Tartu, Tallinn and Elva. If TELE2 clients phone rings, it means your location is in cities marked before. Every TELE2 client asks from the caller - how did you know I'm here??? The telecom operator is EMT (Estonian Mobile Telephone), who has a hard time providing sufficient service and thats why all EMT's clients are suffering under lack of service constantly.
And then there is the Russian capital based Elisa, that sells mobile phones with long cords (not more then 10 km) for maximum service. The Elisa in Estonia is basically dead. No profit has ever been made and the only mobile which has ever left the factory was eventually stolen by Elisa's Chief of Staff.
In Ilmatsalu, there is no service area for talking with cell phones. If you are going there, then please tell someone, you have been visiting this place. Ilmatsalu city has the biggest crime rate in Estonia. Please, do not visit this place! Visit Haage instead.
POP (from EMT) has also been considered legendary, although there is no legend about it. The POP chips are made with extreme accuracy (using hammers and cables) to flood the market with POP's. The people, who have bought and used POP, say that they have been constantly been in touch with alien reptiles. Although you can't use your cell phone with POP, it is still cool as additional stickers, headbands and other cheap stuff from China are given to you in addition. The POP advertisement staff is also known for their keenness on aliens and lawn-hobbits.
Dill, Zorro and etc. are registred trademarks of EMT.
Estonia has a secret GSM operator called Kaubamaja-vork GSM2. Information is confidencial.
Estonians rejoice the functionality of their only email service provider, Hot.ee. Note that by every email you send using Hot.ee, you will donate 3 peanut shells to Russia as human aid. That campaign was made because the EU wanted money for 1,000,000,000 extra peanut shells.
The so called "cream" people (who have loads of money - they sometimes even use it to light a fire in their fireplaces) use number 2 trolley to find their mansions in Mustamäe. If you really want to see how rich Estonians are, use that # 2!!!!
Also they have Secret TV3, run under alien control.
Estonian weather is the most interesting thing in the world - no one ever can know the way it will change in the next moment, even Estonians themselves.
Once upon a time there was some guy called Tarapita, who claimed to be a Jedi and most likely also a demi-god. He had four sons: Kalev, Sulev, Olev and Dimitri. When Tarapita died it turned out he'd lost all his fortune playing cards in Las Vegas. Thus the land was confiscated by powers that be and the 4 guys had to create a new home for themselves. They decided to choose the future king by throwing rocks. Sulev, the oldest, threw the rock far far into some un-named lake. Dimitri threw even further. Kalev, the youngest and the stupidest but the strongest threw the furthest and so won. Kalev had a son whose translated name is Kalevson. Kalevson likes finnish girls very much and often walks to finland to have some fun.
Without much thought he went and sat down in the nearest swamp and declared this spot to be the Kingdom of Estonia It was in the swamp he met Estonia`s national-animal-to-be - the hedgehog - who gave him advice in the matters of importing timber from Tiblastan and exporting it forward to the European Union.
There are no surviving records as to what Olev was doing at the time. Some say he was sleeping after playing holdem poker the whole night, others claim he was starting the trend which was destined to become the first and most honoured Estonian tradition - being in the wrong place at the right time.
But Dimitri went to east and settled a new colonisation for Estonia. It is known now as Russia. Russia means- ruttu siia! In English- Come hurry! Thats why in 1940 Estonia conquered Soviet Union and occupied in until for fifty years.
See also this webpage about Estonian kings.
Wars with Latvia
The "saldejums wars" with Latvia are the most important events in the recent history of Estonia. Recently, gossips have been spread that there is still a part of Latvian territory which is under the control of the "wild Estonian tribes". However, as no witnesses (above all, the saldejumss themselves) have survived, it is difficult to find any definitive information about these events.
The Kilusõda (Sprat war) is a recurrent war between Estonia and Latvija. It starts when 2 guys want to split one sprat. Sprat breaks badly and war is started. It is usually a war on the sea and the participants pretend, as an example, that there are 600 000 marines, 320 diffrent types of ships, 30 aircraft-carriers, 50 000 planes, 570 helicopters and 25 bloodhounds from each side involved, not including the russian spys who participate on 5 tanks.
The king of Estonia is Edgar Savisaar (aka Savipäts, ninasarvik, Savi). At least this is how he thinks himself, as he is followed by cult called Keskerakond. It's also a good tradition to distrust any administration and hold elections more frequently than the official required interval. That is why all the senior citizens rebel against the law. Several collisions between Government Anti Yippie (G.A.Y) and Estonian Liberation Forces (E.L.F) have taken place near the Kings highly defended castle. But there are no records of civilians died in collisions.
The vice president of Estonia is Homer Simpson who is known for his ambitions about world peace.
Also the prime minister Andrus Ansip is under mental control of an alleged "cat" that is actually a russian KGB in a cat suit. His name is Yuri Prime(evolved in mental manipulation and mind control overall). His cover name is Miizu.
Under the influence of Miizu, Andrus Ansip carried out many evil deeds of which the local folk are unaware, and is aligned with the plan of Estonian annihilation master-minded by Russia and Putin. Some claim that Andrus Ansip's real name is Jedi-master Windu, who uses the Stenbocks' House dungeons and cellars to keep the enemies of the Empire in bondage.
More political movements in Estonia:
- Prussakov Bicycle Union (left wing radicals / biker terrorists)
- Nõmme Raadio (ultra right wing moderate terrorists armed with FM frequency beams)
- Rullnokad (ass-wipes, who are speeding with their 15 year old cars. They are the biggest risk group in Estonia)
- Ilmatsalu Gang (the biggest gang in Estonia)
- ETA (Estonian Terrorists Association, secret propaganda agency, banned and now underground)
Security and Privacy
Estonia is known for its safe streets and lanes. To further worsen the situation, Estonia's government has unofficially hired some gorillas, to hunt down unsuspecting civilians and drunk Finnish tourists. These gorillas are known as F.A.L.C.K. - Finnish Agents & Libyan Cat Killers. They have efficiently evolved with the situation in Estonia and are known as the second threat to society (the Parliament wins the most-dangerous-adversary award.
Many Estonians have heard about a new threat to the Empire - a secret project a.k.a The Naabrivalve (the same as Big Brother). Already, hundreds of civilians have been involved in this soon-to-be-big project. The people involved (also known as the NV-s) become very weird, they want to attack everyone and in most of the cases they want to mate with everything that moves (sometimes even with things that don't move!). So you'd better watch your back when you happen to see a "Naabrivalve" sign on a house.
You can easily recognise the participants of The Naabrivalve by staring them in the eye. If they attack you, rip you into pieces and afterwards feed your body parts to their dogs, then you've found them. The NV-s are most vicious at night, at that time they can even attack their relatives who have come to lurk behind their door, (maybe just come to visit,) so watch out by all means! And also thousands of mail deliverers have been killed due to this aggressive overwhelming project. They show no mercy.
Other important tweaks in the Estonian Security System. The policemen (in Estonia known as the mendid) are trained very carefully under the surveillance of extreme professionals. No food is given to them during the training period (which is only 20 years) and the mendid are only allowed to drink contaminated water. They also have to cope some extreme conditions such as 200 degree heat (on sundays) and cold 100 degree below zero (on mondays). During the other weekdays they spend some quality time in Sahara desert and learn some useful skills to fight crime in Estonia. All in all the mendid are physically very tough and mentally as well. Sometimes they seem to be a bit stupid but they only pretend that. Unfortunately the mendid are not good enough to keep crime out of Estonia. Maybe it is because of the little food they are allowed to eat but maybe it's just that the criminals have better preparations.
The mendid usually use wrenches to fight criminals. But sometimes they are even allowed to use metal sticks.
Eesti kaitse vagu. 8k of people
The KAPO is the estonia's backbone of security. It can be compared to FBI, KGB, Gestapo etc. KAPO's history began in 1995, when five expelled students made a terrorist organization, which they named after their leader the KAUPO. The original KAUPO existed only 5 days because the leader Kaupo was arrested for stealing milk from a civilian cow. Then a number of backfalls came: after 7 days their HQ was invaded by seals and they moved to one of the member's dog's kennel. Secondly one of KAUPO's members got preagnent and was taken away (to the morgue). The 3rd event was most devastating: KAUPO went bankrupt and could nut supply the HQ with enough cigars (12 packs per hour) and so the KAUPO was torn apart. 2 years later a religious group became the team with one difference: they named their group KAPO (because GOD doesn't know letter "U"). They carried on the traditions of the original KAUPO (throwing dogs mith stones, skinning birds etc.) until they all came to an end in a streetfight. Today we know KAPO as the main reason for hunger, high rate of syphilis, war with Latvia and the "unexplained" disappareance of the ex Prime Minister's cat. The KAPO, which is controlled by Russians (54,2%), jedis (23,3%), american businessmen (20,1%) and The National Library (2,4%), is the most substanial force in the battle against the Empire and the Federation. Althogh noone actually works there and the HQ is burnt down (by Rullnoxid), Estonia's politicians, people, finance, people's privacy and pizza bars are kept under control by this Big Brother. KAPO's (KAitsePOlitsei) main partner is TÜrgi RAtsapolitsei.
Solar Force (ESF)
The ESF was at first highly criticeased. Now it's widely accepted as the only source of security for the Estonians. It's, however, a top secret. ESF-023 "Tibla" Solar force ship is a main command point of ESF.
Estonia's unit of currency is the Estonian Cocoon, which is freely convertible with live chickens and other Estonian Cocoons at the rate of to 1.
This unusual monetary policy has led to centuries of rampant confusion and massive spurts of hyper-inflation, followed by periodic bouts of hyper-deflation, and occasionally both inflation and deflation at the same time, with the fates of billions of live chickens and chikenogorillas hanging in the balance.
The highest Estonian bank is situated in Ontika. It is 56 meters high. The other famous banks are Panga pank (bank of Bank) in Saaremaa (21.3 m), and Ühispank in Tallinn (more than 80 m, but this one is artificial).
Dependence on Finland
The Estonian economy is fully dependent on Finnish alcohol tourists. In Tallinn, the Finnish also liven up the prostitution, which, however, is dependent of Russian women (however, see above, by all accounts Russian women seem to have an Estonian origin in the first place.)And they called like Põdrad
Some time ago Estonians used to export electricity as well but when they managed to blow up the entire city of Saint- Petersburg they agreed that it's not the best idea. Unfortunately it was already too late. Used toilet paper used to be exported to Latvia, but with the constant decline of population due to alcoholism and the official no-sex policy, this cannot probably last for long.
Big market is exporting Danish flags. People from Denmark loves this flag very much.
Estonia imports gypsies, cellular phones and sand, which is transported through oil pipes to Fiji and then bought back to Estonia.
Polar bears live in Estonia.
Estonia is very well known for its effort to put a man Juku Kakarind near the moon using a self-propelled rubbish bin. His famous phrase "Smell ya later" is engraved on every bin since. Since visibility is near zero throughout the year, which is caused by deodorants, there's absolutely nothing to see in Tartu. Currently, the scientists are investigating the reasons behind the fact that there are some people in Estonia who truly believe that Tartu is nothing but a myth and it exists only in imagination.
Controversially, there are some people that religiously believe that Tartu is THE place to be and live. Another point that deserves closer scientific investigation is strange phenomena of changing people. Otherwise normal people, after moving to Tartu, will very soon change radically: their eyesight goes foggy, clothes strange, they forget to talk the way it makes sense, this usage of beer, wine and some other bad chemicals will dramatically increase. They blame the Spirit of Tartu themselves, but that may be also fake, as the whole village of Tartu. One thing about Tartu is real though - the Statoil gas station right in the centre of it.
Elsewhere in the country people throwing their trash in the woods to celebrate Kakarind first, second and thirds flight and recently situation became desperate as people can't see any more the trees behind piles of rubbish.
Unlike it done in some civilised countries government refuses to pay for refuse collection and using special refuse dispersion birds - called "Suitsupääsuke", the Pubes' Smoking Swallows in English. Its numbers are going down in other countries, as the new laws prohibiting smoking pubes in public are destroying its habitat. Estonia is the last country on Earth to offer a refuge to this wonderfully unhealthy species.
Pubes' Smoking Swallow is a national bird of the republic of Estonia. The bird got it's name from fast changing climate in Estonia. Summer comes so fast that the gentle bird is not used to such heat and literally burns its pubes in the sky with thick smoke. Every summer all the birds are replaced with new ones, specially bred in the laboratories of Tallinn Zoo under the surveillance of , most famous Estonian surgeon who as a first man in earth added with complicated surgery successfully monkeys ass under his right armpit, "just for fart" as he commented it himself sniffing finger.
Young swallows also have serious tobacco smoking problem and the death rate to tobacco related diseases is highest in all national birds worldwide.
The most famous tobacco brand is "Leek", translated "the Pubes on Fire". It reminds them of their fore-fathers burning in the sky.
They meditate and chant: "Higher, higher pubs on fire!"
According to natural scientist in the BBC, Estonian forests deem with fruit bats. They visit the local supermarkets of which there are, gratefully, an abundance, to purchase tropical fruits, which have become extinct in Estonia due to climate change.
The music in Estonia is fantastic(who don't know Mute and Volume). Many countries envy Estonia's great taste in music. Though Estonia doesn't make any music itself, music is widely available from the Internet, almost legally. Men's singing is also astoundingly spectacular here, evidenced by most Estonian male singers' preoccupation with making their voices sound rough and ragged, a practice that normal singers have trouble imitating without coughing spastically.
Arnold Oksmaa is the best known Estonian singer. For the greater good to all humankind and other nations and countries on the earth - he is totally bisexual. He was released from the Estonian Imperial Mental Institution, where he was cured of the life-threatening disease "Thinking of Itsself as Ordinary Unworthy Straight Citizen Syndrome" successfully.
A well-known very-heavy-metal band Vanilla-Godzilla-Ninja was estimated in the beginning of 21st century near the club kung-fu just around the corner. Today it's a fact that this band is almost the father of metal.
Estonia's second most popular entertainment is standing or sitting by big shops, supermarkets or malls and offending any passing furries. Usually the participants are smoking cigarettes and/or drinking alcohol, usually cheap beer. Sometimes they get beaten away by security guards and/or the police.
Estonia is also known for it's extreme luck in the Eurovision Song Contest. Estonia has produced a great mass of singers, artists, drummers etc, who have all eventually failed. Though Eurovision is just a contest, many casualties have been among the singers, due to the aggressiveness from the Eurovision's Fanclub's Fanclub (see above "Cults")
There's a new astonishing entertainment figure in Tallinn. 19 year old bisexual Vicky who is gaining publicity by singing, amusing pretty girls and performing delightful shows of her dancing skills and beautiful body parts. Already she has appeared in such popular daily newspaper like SLÕhtuleht and internet news service Delfi. A new rising star, who predictably has a glorious future.
National sports
Wife carrying
A male has to grab his competitor's wife, toss her on his shoulder and run like hell from the whole competitive tribe. The verb derived hence is "to score". Best Estonian athletes score all the time, even outside competition.
Most famous Estonian wife carrier is Eerik from Ilmatsalu. He has been unbeatable for 5 years with his wife Helena, who is not lightsome. Last summer she weighed about 195 kg (that's about 300 pounds). That's a pretty awesome result, because other wives are in weight below the 60 kg bound.
Estonian Association of Ginger Orphans(EAGO) is proud to say that the 1st official Estonian Russian Roulette Championship will be held in a little Estonian city called Kapa-Kohila on Smarch 27th, 1812. The Games will be held in 3 categories train vs car, train vs truck, and train vs bus.
Beer Drinking
A competition more popular in the summer, reaching its peak in Jaanipäev St. John's Day (National Orgy Day), a special day set aside by the national government for committing suicides, preferably in SUVs, but also other vehicles (it is also a sport, where people try to drive over as many street signs as possible), as well as by plunging into water when drunk, jumping into fires that are helpfully lit all over the country on the eve of St. John's day, and other means. Most often by drinking oneself to death. As this last feat is not easy (most Estonians are used to drinking beer since they were born and have grown a tolerance), those who fail wake up in hospital after a few weeks.
In fact, suicide has become a national sport in itself, but Estonia faces considerable competition from, as tends to be the case, its nearest neighbours and closest relatives.
There are lot of competitions in beer drinking. Most popular and well-known competition is in the Ilmatsalu called "Beat Eerik in beer drinking". It's annual event and every year it has about 20 rullnoks competing to the first place. Who obtains it, gets 50,000 EEK and great fame. That's not all, you are blessed by the Ilmatsalu mayor. Lately, government has banned the sale of alcohol on some more important holidays. This encourages people to try illegal methyl alcohol, which is known for its faster effect, as it kills much swifter.
Kiiking, also known as an over-exaggerated version of swinging, was invented in the early 1990`s. Legend says that some fellows who are constantly doing lifting sports started this national mania, when one of the sportsmen wanted to have a nice morning shit. By accident he didn't end up in a toilet, but on a huge swing. Then the national hero tried to sit down, but each time he bent his legs, the swing ruined his balance and he had to stand up. After half an hour of moving up'n'down Kiiking was born. Although the inventor of the sports got his pants all brown, the people of Estonia are thankful - finally they have something to do when they're drunk.
Stoneball, also known as the most popular sport among the politicians, was first invented a long time ago. It has been said that it was replicated from Americas baseball, to impress George W. Bush when he should visit Abja-paluoja. Stoneball has produced many fertile singers (Arnold Oksmaa), artists (Navitrolla), politicians (see Government hierarchy) and many other. Scientists from the University of Tartu have proven, that playing stoneball at least twice a day raises Estonians IQ dramatically. The most famous stoneballer in Estonia, and probably in the world, is comrade Jürto.
As it is impossible to have sex or anything close to it after having drank 2 litres of vodka (after every 4 hours), there are no known cases of sex in Estonia. Estonians multiply by binary fission. It is every Estonian's duty to reproduce at least a cluster or two of little Estonians.
There are no officially known cases of masturbation in The Mighty Estonia (except Juhan Parts, see chapter on Prostitution) according to the Estonian Imperial Illegal Mastrubation Detection Task Force because in Estonia, sex is free.
This curious sport is one among the numerous things that are called Eesti Nokia. It has been nominated for Estonian Nokia of The Day for at least twice during the past few years. Check it out from their web page. Any bussiness starts with buying free tickets to the buss from Kesklinn to Ihaste. Then, free as a bird, you can walk or fly (depending on your mood) back from Ihaste to Kesklinn and start it over again.
A related phenomenon, known as Viper Grills[3], has caused some mass demonstrations in Brazil during the first decade of the 21st century but has passed relatively unnoticed in Estonia. All participants on this demonstration a virgins or atlantics.
National Holidays
Estonians have three national holidays: Õllesummer (Beer Summer) and the two Halloweens: Mardipäev (Marting day) and Kadripäev (Carting day). There also used to be a holiday called Rock Summer, but that holiday went bankrupt when the National Tax Board looked into it.
Estonians also celebrate summer solstice, known in Estonia as Jaanipäev (St. John Smith's Day). Occasionally referred to as the National Orgy Day, this is an ancient custom. They all take their sledges and swim to Suur-Munamägi a.k.a Great-Egg-Hill island (if the sea isn't frozen). According to the old superstition - the one who swims furthest will get laid, but there is no record whatsoever of this having actually happened. Survivors drink hot pea soup with whipped cream.
School system
Due to the fact that Estonians are too lazy to learn, they are the smartest people in the World and some cases in the Universe. Teachers are paid 6000 EEK (385 €)a month, pupils learn in comfortable leather lounges and watch Woody Woodpecker on TV. There are special schools for hairy-guys (they listen rock music like Eminem) and rapper guys (they listen Hip Hop like Twinkle Twinkle little star).
If students have learned 65 or more years in school (it's called life-long learning there), they can go to university in Tartu, Abja-Paluoja or Ilmatsalu. There they can learn IT or cleaning toilets. Also every Estonian has to be in the French Foreign Legion for five years (in Sahara desert).
Due to population growth within past few years (see Prostitution), Estonian schools are filled with young students. As there are already too many kids and the Ethnic Cleaning (see Mein Kampf) isn't showing progress, the government had to take up serious methods.
For example from now on new students will be included in schools using a very proven and scientific method - lottery. As the politicians say, it would ensure the gypsy integration would stop. Secondly, the government has banned all exams and students automatically get diplomas from a variety of universities, Due to this, Estonia's education's rate has gone up 99.9% and is already paying itself off by a large rate of unemployment. This, as the government says, would only endure a large emigration to Abhasia (see Estonia's neighbours) where Estonians will be slaved and used as a labour force. On school holidays children drink vodka and chill/hang in Viru Keskus and Tammekas. (Tammekas = A.H. Tammsaare's park, Tammsaare is a millionaire who owns 74% of Tallinn)
Driving school system
There are a lot of driving schools too and if you want to drive with a rental car in Estonia, I suggest rather not to do that. Everywhere you go, there are rullnokks (drivers with crazy driving skills and lots of cheap beer) and driving-school cars. Most rullnoks get their drivers licenses in the beautiful gang-city Ilmatsalu. It's not really a city (maybe a village or something like that), except by Estonian standards. There is a guy called Vova. He is directed by Eerik (locals know him as a red Viking). If you give them about €150 you will get your own driver's license in about 2 days!
Estonians dont have driving school. They don't have any cars either, because Estonias are too slow to learn or teach. They use ostriches. And when an ostrich is too old they kill them and cook ostrich marmalade and export to their nifty neighbor Latvia for making Latvian pickles.
- Template:OWQ
- "O yea." ~ William Shakespeare
- "And they will eat all your cheese!" ~ Willy Wonka
- "Moan, Mumble, Roar!" ~ Zombie


text:
User Agent Accessibility Guidelines (UAAG) Overview
For Browsers, Media Players, and other "User Agents"
Page Contents
Quick links: UAAG 1.0, UAAG 2.0 Working Draft
User Agent Accessibility Guidelines (UAAG)
The User Agent Accessibility Guidelines (UAAG) documents explain how to make user agents accessible to people with disabilities, particularly to increase accessibility to Web content. User agents include Web browsers, media players, and assistive technologies, which are software that some people with disabilities use in interacting with computers.
UAAG is part of a series of accessibility guidelines, including the Web Content Accessibility Guidelines (WCAG WG) and the Authoring Tool Accessibility Guidelines (ATAG). Essential Components of Web Accessibility explains the relationship between the different guidelines.
Who UAAG is for
UAAG is primarily for developers of Web browsers, media players, assistive technologies, and other user agents.
UAAG and supporting resources are also intended to meet the needs of many different audiences, including policy makers, managers, and others. For example:
- People who want to choose user agents that are more accessible can use UAAG to evaluate user agents
- People who want to encourage their existing user agent developer to improve accessibility in future versions can refer the user agent vendor to UAAG
What is in UAAG 1.0
UAAG 1.0 contains a comprehensive set of checkpoints that cover:
- Access to all content, including content tied to events triggered by the mouse or keyboard
- User control over how content is rendered
- User control over the user interface, with documentation of accessibility features
- Standard programming interfaces, to enable interaction with assistive technologies
Technical document format
UAAG 1.0, the techniques documents, and the checklist follow the W3C format for technical specifications which includes several sections at the beginning: links to differnt versions, editors, copyright, abstract, and status with the link to errata and the email address for comments. Most WAI specifications have a link at the top to the Table of Contents.
UAAG Versions: 1.0 and 2.0
User Agent Accessibility Guidelines 1.0 was approved in December 2002 and is the stable and referenceable version.
UAAG 2.0 is being developed to help make future generations of Web browsers more accessible, to provide alternative information based on the users technology and platform, and to align with WCAG 2.0 and ATAG 2.0. WAI anticipates UAAG 2.0 may be completed in 2013. Because of the nature of the W3C development process, WAI cannot be certain when the final version of UAAG 2.0 will be available. UAAG 1.0 will remain the latest approved version until version 2.0 is complete.
Currently UAAG 2.0 is a mature draft and we expect that the main content will not change significantly. We recommend that you use the UAAG 2.0 draft in most cases, understanding that it might change.
Who develops UAAG
UAAG technical documents are developed by the User Agent Accessibility Guidelines Working Group (UAWG), which is part of the World Wide Web Consortium (W3C) Web Accessibility Initiative (WAI). For more information about the working group, see the UAWG page.
How WAI Develops Accessibility Guidelines through the W3C Process: Milestones and Opportunities to Contribute describes formal periods for public review. Opportunities for review and comment of WAI documents are announced on the WAI home page and WAI Interest Group mailing list. An email address for sending comments is included in the "Status of this Document" section.
Opportunities for contributing to UAAG and other WAI work are introduced in Participating in WAI.

subset: commoncrawl


text:
I've been working in Afghanistan for thirty years. I covered the Russian invasion and withdrawal, the civil wars, the rise and fall of the Taliban.
It seems that each time I return, control of a province or a city has changed hands. It was working in Afghanistan which taught me a lot about being a photographer.
War and turmoil are a way of life in Afghanistan. One thing that is guaranteed, Afghanistan will endure anything and everything. The people who murmur Inshallah (God willing) don't bet on tomorrow, but strive each day to survive and take care of their families.
Bamiyan, Afghanistan, 2007
A Hazara boy has transformed old car tires into buckets.
After working in the Bamiyan province and seeing the dire stuation of the Hazara people, I founded ImagineAsia to work in partnership with local community leaders and regional NGO's to help provide educational resources for students at all levels, from elementary schools to high schools and universities.
We are happy and proud to welcome Freshta, a young Afghan student from Bamiyan, Afghanistan, who has received a full scholarship from Goucher College in Maryland. ImagineAsia worked with the Afghan Girls Financial Assistance Fund. Our joint efforts were successful in bringing her here to study pre-med.
January, 2011
Ali Aqa lives in Bamiyan Province near Band-e-Amir. His family is poor, his clothes used, but this 15-year-old isn't deterred: He plans to be a lawyer. Childhood memories include Taliban occupation of his village in Bamiyan.
"They burned everything, even my school," he says. "I pray to God no regime comes like that again. After seeing my picture of him in the National Geographic article on the Hazaras, many people wrote to me who would like to help him. ImagineAsia is working to ensure that he also receives a college education.
"The Hazaras are producing the most enthusiastic, educated, forward-looking youth, who are seizing the opportunities provided by the new situation."
– Michael Semple, Deputy to the European Union special representative to Afghanistan in 2004 – 2007.
"We must not believe the many, who say that only free people ought to be educated, but we should rather believe the philosophers who say that only the educated are free." – Epictetus


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Larry Crowne
|Release Date: July 01, 2011
|Running Time: 99 mins.
|MPAA Rating: PG 13
|Box Office: $35,565,975.00
|Genre: Comedy, Drama, Romantic Comedy
Tom Hanks
Julia Roberts
Bryan Cranston
Cedric The Entertainer
All Cast & Crew >>
Summary:Until he was downsized, affable, amiable Larry Crowne was a superstar team leader at the big-box company where he's worked since his time in the Navy. Underwater on his mortgage and unclear on what to do with his suddenly free days, Larry heads to his local college to start over. There he becomes part of a colorful community of outcasts all trying to find a better future for themselves. In his public-speaking class, Larry develops an unexpected crush on his teacher Mercedes Tainot, who has lost as much passion for teaching as she has for her husband. The simple guy who has every reason to think his life has stalled will come to learn an unexpected lesson: when you think everything worth ... Full Summary >>
Event Photos:


text:
Leading you to an educated decision.
NEC Article 800
Communications Circuits - Many codes and specifications refer to Article 800 of the NEC. Article 800 is entitled "Communication Circuits" and generally covers the types of communications cables and their uses. Communications cables includes telephone, telegraph (except radio), outside wiring for fire alarm and burglar alarm, CATV and similar central station systems.


text:
History: Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
For any version listed below, click on its date to view it. For more help, see Help:Page history.
(cur) = difference from current version, (prev) = difference from preceding version, m = minor edit, → = section edit, ← = automatic edit summary


text:
The Power of Independent Thinking
Ivan Eland on Cyber Insecurity After US Drone Downing
Recorded: Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Ivan Eland on RT discusses cyber threats after the downing of the U.S. military drone by Iran.
Experts: Ivan ElandType: TelevisionIssues: Defense and Foreign Policy, Government Secrecy, Technology
Full Video of The Independent Institutes 25th Anniversary Gala for Liberty
Recorded: Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Part 1 |
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Full Video of The Independent Institutes 2011 25th Anniversary Gala for Liberty held November 15, 2011.
Part 1: Introductory Remarks and Tribute to Robert Higgs
Part 2: Tribute to Mario Vargas Llosa
Part 3: History of The Independent Institute and Fund for the Future
Part 4: Tribute to Lech Walesa
Part 5: Special Tributes, Sponsors, and Credits
Experts: Leszek Balcerowicz, Price V. Fishback, Robert Higgs, Ron Paul, Jorge Quiroga, David J. Theroux, Archbishop Desmond M. Tutu, Mario Vargas Llosa, Lech Wałęsa, Yuri Yarim-AgaevType: Independent Institute EventIssues: Bureaucracy and Government, Business, Civil Liberties/ Human Rights, Constitutional Law, Defense and Foreign Policy, Democracy, Economic History and Development (U.S.), Economic Policy, Government Power, History (International), History (U.S), Latin America, Nationalism, Political Ideology and Philosophy, Politics, Privatization, Property Rights, Terrorism and National Crises
Anthony Gregory on Military Assassination of American Citizens
Recorded: Friday, September 30, 2011
Research Editor Anthony Gregory interviewed on KTVU 2 on the dangerous precedent of the US government assassinating American citizens such as Anwar al-Awlaki.
Experts: Anthony GregoryType: TelevisionIssues: Civil Liberties/ Human Rights, Constitutional Law, Terrorism and National Crises
Mary Theroux on BART Cell Phone Shutdown
Recorded: Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Mary Theroux, Senior Vice President at the Independent Institute, engages with Judge Napolitano on Fox Business Network's Freedom Watch about BART's cell phone shutdown in San Francisco.
Experts: Mary L. G. TherouxType: TelevisionIssues: Civil Liberties/ Human Rights, Technology, Transportation
Vicki Alger on a Cyber School Education
Recorded: Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com
Research Fellow Vicki Alger discusses Cyber School education on Fox and Friends.
Experts: Vicki E. AlgerType: TelevisionIssues: Culture/ Society, Education, Family, Technology
Ivan Eland on Obama Breaking War Powers Act
Recorded: Sunday, May 22, 2011
Ivan Eland, Director, Center on Peace and Liberty at the Independent Institute, talks to Russia Today about Obama disregarding the War Powers Act since entering Lybia over 60 days ago.
Experts: Ivan ElandType: TelevisionIssues: Constitutional Law, Defense and Foreign Policy, Diplomacy and Foreign Aid


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Review of Public Administration
In this section you will find information on the Review of Public Administration (RPA).
What is RPA?
The Review of Public Administration was launched by the Northern Ireland Executive in June 2002 with the remit of reviewing the arrangements for the accountability, development, administration and delivery of public services in Northern Ireland.
Which bodies are affected by RPA and which are not?
To find out which NICS and non-NICS bodies are affected by RPA please access the document below. Also available below is a list of bodies that are not affected.
Departmental implementation and progress
Up-to-date information on departmental implementation and progress can be found by contacting the relevant body. Please see below for contact information.
|Contact information
|Local Government
|For updates on local government reform contact the local government reform team on tel 028 9082 3333 or by email email at firstname.lastname@example.com. You can also visit the DOE Local Government Reform website
|For updates on health reform contact: Ray Martin 028 9052 3398
|For updates on education reform contact: Department of Education 028 9127 9279 or Education & Skills Authority Implementation Team 028 9052 3398
|For updates on the NI Library Authority Contact: Libraries NI Headquarters 028 9260 6750
RPA Guiding Principles and Code of Practice
The Public Service Commission and the Office of the First Minister and deputy First Minister have published a compendium which brings together the Guiding Principles, a Code of Practice on Staff Transfers and Guidance Notes to assist the RPA transition and transformation.
- Download the Compendium of the RPA Guiding Principles, Code of Practice and Guidance Notes (PDF 432 KB)
Public Service Commission
The Public Service Commission was established:
'To make recommendations to Government on the guiding principles and steps necessary to safeguard the interests of staff and to ensure their smooth transfer to new organisations established as a consequence of Government decisions on the review of public administration, taking into account statutory obligations, including those arising from section 75 of the Northern Ireland Act 1998.'
For further information you can visit the Public Service Commission's website at the link below.
List of available RPA publications
A number of reports,research papers, briefing papers and consultations have been published relating to the RPA implementation. Please see below link to download the list of documents available.
If you would like to receive an electronic or hard copy of any report listed please use the contact information below.
- email: firstname.lastname@example.com
- phone: 028 9037 8201


text:
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Rio Leather Luggage Tag
No longer available
Our rugged, reusable leather tag has a stylish look that distinguishes your luggage from the rest.
6.5" wide x 2.75" high x 0.25" thick
Made of cow leather.
Lined with tetron.
Stitched trim.
Brass hardware.
Monogramming is available at an additional charge.
Monogram will be centered on one side of the tag.
Catalog / Internet only.


text:
Equip your son to tell a Christmas story or other biblical tale with our Boy's Shepherd Costume. This bible outfit includes a black robe, white under robe, and cord belt. The white tunic features a deep V neckline covered by a short sleeve over robe. Many historic stories and biblical plays feature shepherds and other robed characters. Your son or daughter can dress up as a shepherd, Joseph, Moses, or Bible figures with these simple robes as a base. Add other historical accessories like a crooked staff, sandals, biblical wigs and beards, and religious jewelry to complete your look. Whether you want a fun style for Halloween or you want to supply your local church with pageant outfits, our child's shepherd robe costume is a perfect choice.
Our Price: $4.97
Our Price: $6.97
Our Price: $15.97


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Golden Open Acrylics offer an escape from the studio, allowing acrylic artists to experience the warm sun and fresh spring breeze of plein air painting.
Color Swatch created using heavy application/medium application/50% tint and was applied on acrylic primed canvas (7 oz) material.
Cobalt chromium oxide
This pigment offers a deep but dull and opaque tone of Cobalt Green. It has moderate covering power, but low tinting strength. It is primarily for use on its own, or for mixing with other cobalt colors. It is an alternative to cobalt(II) zinc oxide, another form of Cobalt Green.
Cobalt pigments are absolutely lightfast.
Cobalt chromium oxide is slightly toxic, and is a possible carcinogen.
Cobalt chromium oxide is an alternative Cobalt Green to the better known cobalt zinc oxide. Both pigments were used by landscape artists before phthalocyanine-based pigments became widely available in the 20th century.


text: America's secret drone war in Africa Technology 14 August 12 by David Axe US Air Force More secret bases. More and better unmanned warplanes. More frequent and deadly robotic attacks. Some five years after a US Predator Unmanned Aerial Vehicle flew the type's first mission over lawless Somalia, the shadowy American-led drone campaign in the Horn of Africa is targeting Islamic militants more ruthlessly than ever.Thanks to media accounts, indirect official statements, fragmentary crash reports and one complaint by a UN monitoring group, we can finally begin to define -- however vaguely -- the scope and scale of the secret African drone war.The details that follow are in part conjecture, albeit informed conjecture. They outline of just one of America's ongoing shadow wars -- and one possible model for the future US way of war. Along with the counterterrorism campaigns in Pakistan, Yemen and the Philippines, the Somalia drone war demonstrates how high-tech US forces can inflict major damage on America's enemies at relatively low cost … and without most US citizens having any idea it's even happening.Since 2007, Predator drones and the larger, more powerful Reapers -- reinforced by Ravens and Scan Eagle UAVs and Fire Scout robot helicopters plus a small number of huge, high-flying Global Hawks -- have hunted Somali jihadists on scores of occasions. It's part of a broader campaign of jet bombing runs, naval gun bombardment, cruise-missile attacks, raids by Special Operations Forces and assistance to regional armies such as Uganda's.In all, air raids by manned and unmanned US aircraft have killed at least 112 Somali militants, according to a count by the London-based Bureau of Investigative Journalism. Fifty-seven innocent civilians also died in the raids, the nonprofit Bureau found. The dead jihadists have included several senior members of al-Qaeda or the affiliated al-Shabaab extremist group. In January, a drone launched three Hellfire missiles at a convoy near Mogadishu and killed Bilaal al-Barjawi, the mastermind of the 2010 bombing in Kampala, Uganda, that claimed the lives of 74 soccer fans.In an escalating secret war, drones are doing an ever-greater proportion of the American fighting.The drones are coming It wasn't until relatively recently that US drones were permanently stationed in East Africa. The military and CIA have operated armed versions of General Atomics' one-tonne Predator since 2001, but early on the remote-controlled warplanes were in high demand and short supply. Afghanistan and later Iraq monopolized the drones.That was a big problem for the small US force in East Africa struggling to keep tabs on increasingly radical, and dangerous, Somali militants. "The largest gap is knowledge," Navy Rear Adm. Tony Kurta, former commander of US troops in Djibouti, told Wired.com's Danger Room in 2009.In 2003, Joint Special Operations Command resorted to spending six months sneaking US Navy Seals into Somalia by submarine to painstakingly plant disguised surveillance cameras -- all to capture just a fraction of the images a drone could acquire in a single mission."If we're having to go to that extreme, it's because we lack other capabilities because they're drawn elsewhere," a senior intelligence official told Army Times' ace reporter Sean Naylor. "Instead of doing it like that, you'd want to have more Predators."The drone shortage represented a huge risk for CIA agents attempting to build an intelligence network for tracking suspected terrorists in Somalia. The agency used cash payments to Somali warlords as a "carrot" to draw them to the American side. US air power was supposed to be the "stick" that helped motivate the Somalis. But for years the intel agency didn't actually possess any stick. So it lied, telling the warlords there were drones overhead when in fact there weren't.It was risky bluff. "But it worked," an intelligence official told Naylor.It took a surprise -- and ultimately doomed -- invasion of Somalia by regional power Ethiopia to open the door for a stronger US presence in East Africa. American commandos followed along behind the Ethiopian tank columns as side-firing AC-130 gunships provided lethal top cover.Where once the small US force in East Africa had relied mostly on a single large base in Djibouti, just north of Somalia, in the wake of the Ethiopian blitz American bases sprouted across the region. The CIA and American security contractors set up shop alongside a UN-backed peacekeeping force at the shell-crated international airport in Mogadishu. American contractors quietly carved a secret airstrip out of a forest in Arba Minch, Ethiopia. Under the guise of tracking Somali pirates, the Pentagon negotiated permission to base people and planes on the Indian Ocean island nation of the Seychelles.Soon all these bases would support drone aircraft being churned out at an accelerating rate by the US aerospace industry. In 2003 the US military possessed only a handful of Pioneer, Predator and other drones. After spending around $5 billion (£3.2 billion) annually, year after year, by 2012 America's robotic arsenal had swelled to 678 large and medium drones and no fewer than 3,000 small, hand-launched Ravens. Some of each were destined for Somalia, where the CIA and Pentagon were advancing plans for a far-reaching, but subtle, campaign to defeat militants and prop up a fledgling, UN-backed government. It was a campaign that, in stark contrast to the occupations of Iraq and Afghanistan, would not include any large, permanent American ground forces. American CIA agents, mercenaries, commandos and drones would provide intelligence, training, raiding prowess and air cover while Ethiopian, Ugandan and Kenyan troops did most of the day-to-day fighting inside Somalia. Read page 2 123 Read on one page Latest on wired.co.uk


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Suffolk University is committed to our veteran students, as well as our active service students and their eligible family members, and our population of these students continues to grow. We care significantly about their experience here and their success, and we work hard through a broad range of services and activities to make their Suffolk experience very positive.
This website gets you started with the information you need to successfully transition to academic and community life here at Suffolk, to enjoy a great learning opportunity, and to become proud alumni of our school. Please browse the (bottom) left side navigation links labeled: Academics, Admissions, Financing Your Education and On-campus Resources for additional information on Veteran Services.
University President's Commission
On December 17, 2012, President McCarthy established the President's Commission on Veteran and Active Duty Students as an institutional committee, "…focusing on the needs of veteran and active service students." The Commission's objective is to optimize the veteran student experience at Suffolk, creating a more vibrant community for those who want to participate.
The Commission is comprised of members of the University community (including current students) who have the knowledge and experience of working with veterans and active service students.The Commission meets at least twice per semester, and veteran students are invited to contact any of the Commission's members.
Suffolk University complies with the "Principles of Excellence for Educational Institutions Serving Service Members, Veterans, Spouses, and Other Family Members" established by Presidential Executive Order 13607 issued April 27, 2012. (Download a PDF version of the executive order.)
Commission Members
Prof. Michael L. Barretti, Sawyer Business School, Co-Chair
Lorraine Cove, Registrar's Office, Suffolk Law School
Douglas Peterson, Registrar's Office, Veteran Certification Official
Ann Coyne, Dean of Students Office, College of Arts & Sciences and Sawyer Business School
Jeffrey Gangi, student, Suffolk Law School
David Merson, Office of Professional and Career Development
Prof. Steven McDonald, Sawyer Business School
Prof. Gregory Fried, College of Arts & Sciences
Danny Luu, Bursar's Office
Jennifer Ricciardi, Student Financial Services
Audra Jamal White-Stadnik, Student Veterans Organization Chapter
Laura Piscopo, graduate student
Bryan Mendiola, Counseling Center
Michael Smith, Veteran's Upward Bound Program
Kirsten Behling, Disability Services
Laura Ferrari, Dean of Students, Suffolk Law School
Kate Schmeckpepper, Office of the General Counsel
Patrick George, President, Suffolk Veteran Students Organization


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Two days before the first debate between President Barack Obama and Governor Mitt Romney, John Elway says he's endorsing Romney.
"Governor Romney is a proven leader with the experience and background to turn around our struggling economy," said John Elway. "In these tough economic times, we need a president who understands how to get America working again – by standing on the side of taxpayers and small-business owners who do the real job creating. I am endorsing Governor Romney and Congressman Ryan for President and Vice President because I know having the courage to make decisions and tackle challenges is what leads to results and real change. America needs a comeback team – Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan are that team."
Romney commented about the endorsement in a news release Monday night. He said, "Leaders come in many forms, and John Elway has always exemplified leadership, first as a quarterback for the Super Bowl champion Broncos, and now as an executive vice president for the team."
Romney and President Obama will debate for the first time Wednesday at the University of Denver. You can watch the debate on KKTV 11 News at 7 p.m.
KKTV firmly believes in freedom of speech for all and we are happy to provide this forum for the community to share opinions and facts. We ask that commenters keep it clean, keep it truthful, stay on topic and be responsible. Comments left here do not necessarily represent the viewpoint of KKTV 11 News.
If you believe that any of the comments on our site are inappropriate or offensive, please tell us by clicking "Report Abuse" and answering the questions that follow. We will review any reported comments promptly.powered by Disqus
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Georgia Rare Species and Natural Community Data
HUC10 Watershed Rare Elements
This page provides reports containing lists of the rare animals, plants and natural communities known from each HUC10 watershed in Georgia. HUC10 stands for Hydrologic Unit Code 10 digits. It is part of a system devised by the US Geological Survey for defining watersheds and is in wide use throughout the United States.
Get report by selecting HUC10 watershed name.
Get report by selecting HUC10 watershed code
Get report by navigating to location and clicking on map.
Navigate to Page:
Ranger Hotline
Report poaching and wildlife violations. You can receive a cash reward if your tip leads to an arrest—even if you wish to remain anonymous.


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this wiki
(written from a Production point of view)
Harve Bennett (born Harve Bennett Fischman) (born 17 August 1930; age 85) has been a television producer and writer since 1968 for numerous TV series, most notably including The Mod Squad (starring Tige Andrews and Clarence Williams III), The Six Million Dollar Man, The Bionic Woman, and Time Trax.
For Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Bennett executive-produced and developed the story with Jack B. Sowards. He both wrote the script and produced Star Trek III: The Search for Spock, as well as providing the voice for a flight recorder. Along with producing Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, he and Leonard Nimoy developed the story while he wrote the script with Steve Meerson, Peter Krikes, and Nicholas Meyer. And lastly, Harve produced Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, developing the story with William Shatner and David Loughery. He also made a cameo appearance as Starfleet Chief of Staff Admiral Robert Bennett. In the wake of the film's poor performance and reception, he departed the film series and was replaced by his associated producer Ralph Winter. He was interviewed for the Star Trek 25th Anniversary Special documentary in 1991.
Harve Bennett was born Harve Fischman in Chicago, Illinois.
In 2009 Bennett was interviewed for the special feature "Star Trek: The Three Picture Saga" on the DVD box release of Star Trek: Original Motion Picture Collection, alongside Garfield and Judith Reeves-Stevens, Peter Krikes, Steve Meerson, Nicholas Meyer, and Ralph Winter.
In 1965 Bennett worked as ABC network executive in charge of the Gene Roddenberry-produced unsold pilot The Long Hunt of April Savage, which starred Robert Lansing and featured Charles Dierkop. According to Robert Justman, Roddenberry threw Bennett off the set in a moment of anger. (Inside Star Trek: The Real Story)


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This Maine Community Films documentary features good ol' New England country music. A story told through one of the most highly regarded country, bluegrass, and rockabilly recording labels in the country and its founder.
In 1956, Westbrook resident and television repair man Al Hawkes founded the Event Records label with his wife Barbara and their friend Richard Greeley. Al began producing records by local Maine artists and popular musicians on tour in Maine "from away." Throughout the 1950s and 60s, he created some of the most highly regarded country, bluegrass, and rockabilly recordings. The Eventful Life of Al Hawkes tells the story of Event Records, and Al's own story as an accomplished musician and officially designated "First Generation Bluegrass Music Pioneer." As Al works to preserve the thousands of recordings he has made and collected in the past sixty years, we learn how vital our musical history is to understanding the culture of our region.
The Eventful Life of Al Hawkes is produced by Andrew Jawitz of Rockhouse Mountain Productions.
To purchase a video visit the Rockhouse Mountain Productions website
Go to the MPBN Community Films Web page
[The Eventful Life of Al Hawkes originally aired on MPBN Community Films December 2, 2010.]


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Drew has implied that Lapras was Solidad's Starter Pokemon, since it had been with her for a long time. Lapras debuted in the first round of the Kanto Grand Festival where it used Sheer Cold to freeze all the water in the pool. Its magnificent performace earned Solidad second place in the next stage.
Lapras was next seen in the Top 16 battle where it froze its opponents and then Solidad's Slowbro blasted them with Hyper Beam knocking them out. It was last seen in the Quarter-Finals where it was used alongside Butterfree.
Known moves
|Sheer Cold
|May we Harley Drew'd Ya
|Ice Beam
|Thinning the Hoard
|+ indicates this Pokémon used this move recently.*
- indicates this Pokémon normally can't use this move.
- It is not actually known which Pokemon froze Girafarig and Zangoose since only the last part of the battle was shown. Slowbro, who was fighting alongside Lapras at the time, is capable of learning Ice Beam but Solidad's Slowbro has never actually been shown using Ice Beam and since Lapras is part Ice type, it is assumed that it was the one who froze Girafarig and Zangoose. Additionally, Solidad's Slowbro was already capable of using four moves, although it should be noted that some Pokemon have been shown using more than four moves in a single episode in the anime.


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The Power of Independent Thinking
Ben Powell on Government Consumer Safety Videos & Media Piracy Enforcement
Recorded: Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Benjamin Powell engages with Tracy Byrnes on Fox Business Networks Freedom Watch on Government consumer safety videos and
the enforcement of media piracy laws.
Experts: Benjamin W. PowellType: TelevisionIssues: Business, Culture/ Society, Entertainment, Government Waste/Pork, Public Health/ Consumer Protection, Regulation and Deregulation
Benjamin Powell on Texas Economy & Gun Laws
Recorded: Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Benjamin Powell, Senior Fellow at the Independent Institute, engages with Judge Napolitano on Fox Business Network's Freedom Watch.
Experts: Benjamin W. PowellType: TelevisionIssues: Economic Policy, Gun Control


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May 4, 2016
There are new reports that Aaron Alexis, the suspected gunman in the Washington Navy Yard shooting, sought help from Veterans Affairs hospitals because he was hearing voices and having problems sleeping.
Many say Alexis suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD.
We spoke to Veterans in Greenville who understand what it's like to suffer from PTSD, and why they believe Alexis could have had other issues.
Al Rice and James Stanley are Army Vietnam Veterans who say they suffer from PTSD.
Rice says he knew it was bad when got into an altercation with a young neighbor years ago. He says, "This guy spit on me and I was choking him and his buddy ran over to me and said you're going to kill him. I said yeah. And I said he ain't worth it and my brain kicked in and said it ain't worth it let him go."
For Stanley, his PTSD is more like paranoia. He says, "Your mind is over active. It will start making problems where there are no problems and it will amplify those things."
Reports indicate Alexis said he was being treated for PTSD.
In a Rhode Island police report, Alexis called officers to his hotel last month claiming he heard voices, he thought people were following him and talking to him through the walls of hotels and sending microwaves through his body. He told the officer he never had a history of mental illness.
Both Stanley & Race aren't convinced Alexis suffered from PTSD.
Rice says, He was schizophrenic or paranoid or schizophrenia , he just went crazy."
Stanley says, "If it was more PTSD I would think they would be more suicidal."
We spoke to a doctor who works with Veterans that suffer from PTSD and they say they are skeptical about Alexis suffering from PTSD as well, and believe he had a schizophrenic episode.
Click Here to access the online Public Inspection File
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For an adorable addition to your Mickey Mouse date for the major costume party sport a Glam Red Minnie Costume for Adults for a Disney match made in heaven. Our Minnie Mouse ensemble includes the mouse's classic red dress with white polka dots and puffy sleeves with ruffled edges. The dress comes with a sequin-lined, sheer black panel on the bottom and a white sequin paneled bust with black sequin trim. Also included is a wide black sequin bow belt and jumbo, black sequined mouse ears with Minnie's bow to match the dress. Minnie Mouse is the female partner to Disney's famous Mickey Mouse and adds a burst of sweetness to our rascally rodent. Whether you go to the masquerade with or without Mickey, you will utterly adorable no matter what in this Glam Red Minnie Costume for Adults.
Our Price: $39.99
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The Professional Quality Santa Suit XXXL is our highest quality Santa ensemble that's perfect for professional and promotional use. This professional quality, top of the line Santa ensemble will make you the best looking Santa out there and will ensure your professional Santa appearances go fantastically. The Professional Quality Santa Suit XXXL features the classic red jacket and white fur trimmed jacket and pants, both lined in satin fabric on the inside. You will also receive the matching hat with pom pom accent, a large wide belt and buckle, and black boot tops to complete the ensemble. This Santa Outfit is available for men in jacket sizes 58 to 62. Don't forget to check out our accessories for great additional pieces and props to make sure you have everything you need.
Our Price: $49.99
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TERRE HAUTE (www.incnow.tv) - Five players from northeast Indiana strutted their stuff at the 25th annual North South All Star Classic basketball event at Rose-Hulman Institute on Sunday.
Northrop's Brenton Scott tossed in 19 points, teammate and twin brother Bryson Scott had 14, and V.J. Beachem of New Haven scored 16 in the North's 130-116 win over the South in the boy's game.
South Side's Ariana Simmons tallied 14 points and Canterbury's Bailey Farley contributed five for the North girls, who fell to the South girls in overtime 91-86.
For highlights of both games click on the video icon on the screen above.
What are your thoughts CLICK HERE to leave us a "QUESTION OF THE DAY" comment.
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Vodka Infusions
Date: 03/20/2012
Time: 6:30pm - 8:00pm
Cost: $25
Enjoy cocktail hour at home with delicious, sophisticated vodka infusions. Join local cocktail maven Marianne Colgrove as she teaches you how to transform ordinary vodka into an extraordinary cocktail mixer with herbs, spices, fresh fruits and veggies. All materials are provided. Students will go home with a pint of infused vodka of their choice, handouts with cocktail recipes, and myriad ideas to create new and daring infusions of their own.


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Vehicle thefts are on the rise, and in some counties, this includes ATVs.
The Otero County Sheriff's Office has provided the following tips to help ATV owners to protect themselves from theft:
•Keep your ownership documents in a safe place not on the ATV.
•Register your ATV at the time of purchase.
•Record the serial number and keep it on file.
•Use a metal-etching tool to mark personal information, such as name and address, in an obscure spot.
•Never leave the key in the ignition.
•Use a theft prevention device such as a wheel lock, chain, alarm.
•Whenever possible, park your ATV inside.
•Take photographs of your ATV to aid police in locating it should it be stolen.
KKTV firmly believes in freedom of speech for all and we are happy to provide this forum for the community to share opinions and facts. We ask that commenters keep it clean, keep it truthful, stay on topic and be responsible. Comments left here do not necessarily represent the viewpoint of KKTV 11 News.
If you believe that any of the comments on our site are inappropriate or offensive, please tell us by clicking "Report Abuse" and answering the questions that follow. We will review any reported comments promptly.powered by Disqus
Click Here to access the online Public Inspection File
Viewers with disabilities can get assistance accessing this station's FCC Public Inspection File by contacting the station with the information listed below. Questions or concerns relating to the accessibility of the FCC's online public file system should be directed to the FCC at 888-225-5322, 888-835-5322 (TTY), or email@example.com.


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Based in central Kent, with more than of 400 members, San Fairy Ann Cycling Club is one of the longest serving clubs catering for cyclists of all ages and levels. If racing or a clubrun is what you are looking for then come and visit us and you'll be welcomed with open arms.
We have our own racing team 'SFA Racing Team' separately sponsored by Abellio, supported by the main club and Cycles UK Maidstone.
As a club, we organise and take part in almost every form of cycling: racing, touring, off-road, long distance and social riding. We also organise a range of social activities off the bikes. Have a look at the Calendar and Social pages to get an idea of just how much we get up to.
As well as the listed events, there are also club runs every Saturday (9 groups), one Sunday group and a Wednesday group, catering for riders of all abilities.
In addition to purely club activities, we are also heavily involved in the Kent Cycling Association, Cycling Time Trials, British Cycling, the Veterans Time Trial Association and Audax UK.
If you come and join one of our Saturday or Sunday club rides, the other riders will make you feel very welcome. If you are at all apprehensive, or not very experienced, there will be plenty of encouragement and advice. There's no need to make advance arrangements, just choose a suitable run and come along. You are welcome to ride with us for a few weeks before deciding whether or not to join.


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Carbon credits arranged through Carbonfund.org offset the gathering's environmental impact for the entire conference and all attendees
ASPEN, CO., June 27, 2006 – Energy Innovations, Inc., currently developing the world's first low-cost rooftop photovoltaic (PV) solar concentrator system, announced today that it's making the 2006 FORTUNE Brainstorm conference – being held this week in Aspen, Colorado – carbon neutral with Carbonfund.org, as a practical step to combat global warming. Organized and guided by FORTUNE's editors, Brainstorm symbolizes the magazine's curiosity about and involvement with the wider issues that affect the world of business. Brainstorm's attendees and panelist include some of the world's top business executives and major world and national figures.
Energy Innovations is taking action against climate change by teaming with Carbonfund.org to offset the carbon emission impact of the conference and its attendees. With some 325 people traveling to Aspen, the event will produce over 350 metric tons of carbon emissions caused by air travel, ground transportation and the use of facilities in the hotel and city. Carbonfund.org and Energy Innovations will offset the carbon dioxide emissions by supporting energy efficiency projects that reduce an equal amount of emissions.
"We at Energy Innovations are working very hard to come up with cost effective solar solutions for the planet to help slow our burning ways," said Bill Gross, CEO of Energy Innovations and a regular attendee of FORTUNE Brainstorm. "It's equally as important to do something right now – especially at this conference – to try to help. Our goal in neutralizing the environmental impact of Brainstorm is to make a small dent, but more importantly, to provide a big reminder about how lucky we all are to have this fuel for now, and how thoughtful we should be about it for our future."
"It takes a visionary like Bill Gross to realize there are better ways of making electricity—and of running conferences," said David Kirkpatrick, FORTUNE senior editor and Brainstorm's director. "We are grateful to Energy Innovations and Carbonfund.org for making Brainstorm a carbon-neutral conference, and by doing so, educating our attendees and the larger community. All of us have to do our part to help address global warming."
Carbonfund.org is a non-profit organization whose goal is to make carbon offsets and climate protection easy, affordable and a normal way of life for every individual and business. Carbon offsets enable individuals and businesses to reduce carbon dioxide emissions in one location, where it is cost effective, to offset the emissions they are responsible for in their normal activities, like home, office, driving or air travel emissions. For instance, a clean, zero CO2 solar farm can offset the carbon dioxide produced by a coal-fired power plant that powers a home.
Energy Innovations, Inc. is currently developing the world's first low-cost rooftop photovoltaic (PV) solar concentrator system, called the Sunflower™. Each Sunflower module tracks the sun throughout the day and year, concentrating its light onto a small panel of PV cells that generate electricity. By replacing large amounts of very expensive, silicon-based PV cells with inexpensive materials such as mirrors or lenses, Energy Innovations expects to drive down the cost of solar electricity by half or more. More information on the company can be found at http://www.energyinnovations.com
About FORTUNE Brainstorm Conference
The FORTUNE Brainstorm conference brings together a unique, multidisciplinary group of global-minded leaders for a dialogue on the challenges and opportunities that arise at the intersection of business, technology, society, and world affairs. For the fifth year, FORTUNE and the Aspen Institute will provide these leaders with an opportunity to step out of their daily context, open themselves to new insights and perspectives, and bring the bigger picture into focus with an eye toward shaping a better future.
About Energy Innovations, Inc.
Energy Innovations was founded in 2000 by entrepreneur and current CEO, Bill Gross, to deliver cost-effective, grid-competitive solar electric power. The company is developing the world's first mass-produced rooftop photovoltaic tracking concentrator system, called the Sunflower, designed to bring the cost of solar below that of utility-supplied electricity. Energy Innovations is an operating company of Idealab, a creator and operator of technology businesses.


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Migraines & Headaches Health Center
Migraines and Headaches
In this article
Can Migraines Be Prevented?
Yes, migraines can be prevented. You can reduce the frequency of your migraine attacks by identifying and then avoiding migraine triggers. You can keep track of your headache patterns and identify headache triggers by using a headache diary.
Recalling what was eaten prior to an attack may help you identify those foods that cause your migraines and make the necessary dietary changes to avoid these triggers in the future.
Stress management and coping techniques, along with relaxation training, can help prevent or reduce the severity of the migraine attacks.
Women who often get migraines around their menstrual period can take preventive therapy when they know their period is coming.
Migraine sufferers also seem to have fewer attacks when they eat on a regular schedule and get adequate rest. Regular exercise -- in moderation -- can also help prevent migraines.
When lifestyle changes aren't effective at preventing migraines, there are other options.
When the headaches are severe, occur more than two or three times a month, and are significantly interfering with normal activities, your doctor may prescribe preventive medication. Preventive medications reduce the frequency and severity of the headaches and are generally taken on a regular, daily basis.
Also, Cefaly is the first FDA-approved device for preventing migraines in people over age 18. The portable headband-like device gives electrical impulses on the skin at the forehead. This stimulates the trigeminal nerve, which is associated with migraine headaches. Cefaly is used once a day for 20 minutes, and when it's on you'll feel a tingling or massaging sensation.
WebMD Medical Reference


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Buy Aceeca Handhelds & Accessories
Welcome to our online store. Please choose a device below to buy and any related accessories to that device. You can make purchases online through our secure website.
Aceeca's powerful Laser Barcode Scanner is available as a packaged barcode scanner solution with our rugged MEZ1500 handheld platform.Learn More | Add to Compare
Meazura RDA1500$660.00
The Meazura RDA1500 Kit (based on the MEZ1500 platform) is the perfect product for those who need to run their software application on a rugged PDA.Learn More | Add to Compare
Meazura OEM1500$750.00
The Meazura OEM1500 Kit (based on the MEZ1500 platform) is the perfect product for established hardware module developers.Learn More | Add to Compare


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Fall Job Fair and Academic Showcase at Vol State
Submitted on September 07, 2010 at 3:59 PM
The Fall Job Career Fair at Volunteer State Community College is expanding this year to include information about academic programs, all of which can help job seekers and students. More than 50 businesses are expected to attend. The businesses will have tables at the event so they can meet one-on-one with job seekers. Job seekers can get resumes directly into the hands of the people hiring, and see what opportunities are available. The businesses will be joined by many Vol State academic programs and student services. They will provide information about how people can build new job skills or start a new career path. Special advising with be available in a number of career and academic areas.
The Fall Job Career Fair and Academic Showcase will be held Wednesday, September 22 from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. in the Pickel Field House, on the Vol State campus at 1480 Nashville Pike in Gallatin. The event is free and open to the public. For more information call 615-230-3307.
A service provided by the Office of Public Relations.


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What is RM Cash
User Tip: If you're unsure of your vehicle type, you may skip the machine type selection box.
Select type, make, model and year above
"Customer service is priority #1 at Rocky Mountain ATV/MC. We value our customers and strive to be the best shopping experience- when you buy from us, you are buying lifetime service."
-Dan Thomas, CEO and Founder
We take pride in offering no hassle returns. In the event of a return, please call, email or chat with us to receive a solution to the problem. For apparel that doesn't fit quite right, Click here to see our Fit Guaranteed Program.
We will stand behind all products we sell with regards to manufacturing defects in workmanship and material. Most products are limited to the manufacturer's warranty. However, we will do everything in our power to take care of the problem.
Each review submitted enters you into a $100 gift card monthly drawing, and a $500 gift card quarterly drawing!
Comments On Apr 06, 2014:Easy installation after adding to bike with the aftermarket pipes and K@N air filter I noticed a improvement from the start from take off to full throttle sound better well worth the money I am still tweaking to get the best setup.
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Comments On Jul 31, 2013:It works really well, but I am sure for 500 the autotune works better. This got rid of the lean condition and helped performance a little bit. Good deal.
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Comments On Mar 16, 2012:I installed the Cobra Fi2000R on my 2007 VStar 1300.Great product with very easy installation. Excellent results.
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Depending on the printmaking technique, Gamblin Inks may need to be adjusted slightly with a modifier in order to print perfectly. Temperature, humidity, the type of plate, and the type of paper all affect how inks perform.
Burnt Plate Oil #000 — Burnt Plate Oils are used to reduce ink viscosity. They should be added sparingly, as the detail of a print might be lost if the ink becomes too fluid. Gamblin Burnt Plate Oil #000 has less tack and is a good match for use with Gamblin Relief Inks.
Burnt Plate Oil #2 — Burnt Plate Oils are used to reduce ink viscosity. They should be added to inks sparingly, as the detail of a print may be lost if the ink becomes too fluid. The primary oil binder for Gamblin Etching Inks, Burnt Plate Oil #2 has a higher tack than Burnt Plate Oil #000.
Magnesium Carbonate — Magnesium Carbonate is traditionally used to stiffen inks and reduce their gloss level. It works well with both Gamblin Etching Inks and Gamblin Artist's Colors Relief Inks. Once combined, it becomes transparent and will not alter the color of the ink. Only a small amount is needed to increase body, so add it sparingly and mix well.
Tack Reducer — Tack Reducer is a gel made from a very light drying oil. Because it is transparent, it does not alter the color intensity of the ink. Add it in small amounts to efficiently reduce tack.
see also ...
® Gamblin is a registered trademark.


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Clint Sintim #51
The Latest: NFL Draft: Updated top 100 prospects — 12/31/2008
Texas Tech receiver Michael Crabtree began the season as a top-10 prospect for the 2009 NFL draft. After another stellar season, Crabtree may now be the top pospect of them all. Get inside for an updated top 100 from our NFL draft partners at the National Football Post.[details]