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- Tabor Williams
- Fair Oaks, CA
- United States
This conversation is closed.
If you tell a lie and it becomes the truth, does it matter that you once lied?
In the way that some people questions whether or not the ends justify the means, I'm wondering if you tell a lie and it becomes the truth, does it matter that you once lied?
Closing Statement from Tabor Williams
Thanks for all the participation and discussion everyone!
Showing single comment thread. View the full conversation.
Linda Taylor 50+Nov 16 2012: I don't lie. I have with held information but I don't lie even if it is to save my own or someone else's feelings. There are many reasons for this but probably underlying it all is I have a value of trust.
If someone lies to me, it forever changes the balance of trust. It will always effect what I say and how I treat them in the future. I will pass them over for opportunities and I will not work with them outside of the minimum necessary. If they happen to be family it works the same. I won't invite them so they do not have to lie and I will edit what I say to them.
I remember learning that people who lie, do so for only two reasons. One, they lie for themselves. Two, they lie for others. For me, whether selfish or selfless, lying is never worth it.
Nov 16 2012: No because lying is telling a falsehood. Deception, however has a more broad definition and I would be OK if you wanted to call withholding information deceptive. But there is so much out there that is deceptive. If I wear clothes that make me look thinner, heals that make me look taller, arrange furniture so the room looks bigger. All that is deceptive but it is not lying.
Lying is intentionally delivering false information. Whatever the reason.
Lying is usually a cheap cop-out wielded by cheap people that want to avoid responsibility. Politicians for instance...
Nov 17 2012: During the Old Ages, when you was told to tell the truth under the Eye of God, for example during trial, there was an interesting form of lie : you could start a sentence like "I did not still apples..." and end it in your mind "...last year". It was considered that God could hear all your thoughts, so the sentence as a whole was not a lie.
So I have a wider definition of lie that "telling a falsehood". I include in lies all informations provided with the intent to deceive, what Linda calls "deceptive things".
That's because "information" have a variety of forms. Imagine you're in conversation with several people and someone tells a lie : you know it is one. If you stay silent, are you lying too ? What if you nod ? If you mutter a "Mmm" acknowledgment ? If you say "Yes" ?
My opinion is that it is not worth trying to define a thin line between lies and deception.
As Linda pointed out, deception is everywhere in minor forms : appearance, advertising, etc. We must simply keep in mind that our perception can be influenced in many ways, that we ourself are biased for a lot of reasons, and live with it.
Nov 17 2012: Interesting, I initially disagreed with your position, because I considered deception and lies to be equivocal in the sense that it is about actively trying to get another to hold true an idea you believe to be false through communication.
Wiki states "The five primary forms of deception are:[citation needed]
Lies: making up information or giving information that is the opposite or very different from the truth.
Equivocations: making an indirect, ambiguous, or contradictory statement.
Concealments: omitting information that is important or relevant to the given context, or engaging in behavior that helps hide relevant information.
Exaggerations: overstatement or stretching the truth to a degree.
Understatements: minimization or downplaying aspects of the truth.[1]"
So here a lie is a sub-class of deception where you actively invent information that is untrue, while concealment has the same ends it doesnt rely on the creation of an untruth in the mind of the deceiver, but in the deceiver providing true information in a way that he knows the receiver will interpret in such a way that they will create the untrue scenario on their own.
Dictionary.com and Wicktionary do however include any attempt to convey a false impression. If you come at it from a pure communication perspective, it begins to fall back into my original assumption.
Consider this scenario. The liar has a certain untrue idea he wants to pass on to a receiver. The liar also is aware and adept at rhetoric, the study of the effective use of language. If the liar knows that his untrue idea is more likely to be transferred to the mind of the receiver through omission rather than specifically expressing his untrue idea, doesnt that then become the active (and in a way more intelligent and effective) communication of a untrue idea?
How then is communicating a falsehood different from telling a falsehood?
Anyone able to clear this up for me?
Nov 17 2012: @ Oliver. I understand your scenario but I would never want to convey an untrue idea. Why would I want to do that?
For example. I never told my kids there was a Santa. I just did not correct the impression. I played along with their belief because sometimes magic is important for young children in a scary world.
So I never said there was a Santa and they had to behave or not get presents. I never tried to control them or thier behavior with a lie. But their world had a little magic and sparkle for a time. Then I had to live through the whole consumer-greed stage but they made it through that one too. Now they are beginning to understand that it's not about the getting, but it's about the giving.
So you see, if I would have lied, when they figured it out, they would have blamed me, and rightly so. AND more importantly, that balance of trust would have been broken.
Now they are older and see the big picture. There is no anger or blame or broken trust.
That's the difference.
@ Jean-Charles
If someone lies in front of me I always call them out. Maybe not in front of everyone depending on the situation. But I will not tolerate that type of environment.
I truly believe we teach people how to treat us. If they feel it is alright to lie to me that would be my fault if I did not correct it.
Nov 18 2012: I don't think that at a certain point you can teach people how to treat you. People can justify anything, including lying to their loved ones. It has nothing to do with it being your fault. Obviously you'd take steps to make them not lie to you like calling them out or sitting down and having a serious conversation with them like you mentioned.
Yet I do think we all want to be the change we'd like to see in the world.
Nov 18 2012: Tabor,
We "teach" people, or demonstrate to people, all the time how we want to be treated by accepting, or not accepting certain behaviors. It is not our "fault" when others behave inappropriately, and in my perception, it becomes my responsibility for myself to be clear about what I will accept.....or not. We cannot "make" anyone stop lying. We can, however make it very clear to others what we will and will not accept....like you say...have a conversation with them....let them know that lying is not acceptable. If we are not clear in ourselves about lying....how, why, when, with whom, for what reason... then we cannot be clear with others. What is the "big lie", and what is the "little mundane lie" may not be the same for everyone.
Nov 17 2012: Linda are there not circumstances in which lying is a necessity? To take an absolutist stance, in which 'lying is never worth it' seems problematic. Take for example a German during the Nazi regime who is lying to protect a Jewish friend from persecution. In such a case is an absolutist stance valid?
Nov 17 2012: Say that a friend of yours has been really down and out recently, and needs something to really pick them up. They win an academic award, and it puts them in really bright spirits. You're then notified that in reality YOU are the person who won the award, and would you like your friend stripped of the award so that it can be given to you. You decline, letting them keep the award. You then praise them for winning the award, etc. Would that simply be withholding information when you validate their win? Would a lie in that kind of situation be justified? Or are lies never justifiable in your eyes?
Nov 18 2012: @ Tabor
Sorry but my ego is just not that fragile. Awards are just that. They are awarded to someone from someone else. If my friend received the award I would be happy for them. If I knew it was supposed to be for me, I would not divulge that information. I would keep that information to myself and rejoice with my friend. I would not need to have the award.
I am not making up false information and I am not trying to manipulate the situation. Stuff like that can bring bad "ju ju." I would not be able to live with overturning the award and it would bother me. So I would really be happy for my friend.
I never said lies were not justifiable. Indeed many people do. They are just not justifiable to me.
Linda Taylor 50+Nov 19 2012: Daniel. Regarding the classic Nazi example. If I were to participate in an illegal activity I would not tell anyone. It really is that simple but most people cannot do that. And here is a little trick I learned. When someone asks you a question, you don't have to answer. You see, silence is as big a part of trustworthiness as being truthful.
I've been doing this several decades now. It is a very effective tactic.
When my kids were old enough to directly question me about Santa, I was truthful. But they were well into grade school by then.
Nov 19 2012: Hi Linda,
Good point...when someone asks a question, we are not obligated to answer. I also suggest that we have the ability to re-direct information.
My mom always used to say that Santa was a "feeling"...a story... and we could carry that feeling with us every day of the year. At Christmas time, as children, we still enjoyed the image and the story of santa, we still got the presents from santa under the tree, and could enjoy the anticipation and joy of the holiday, and I believed, as my mom said, that it is a feeling that we can have throughout the year. She was telling the truth, and we could still enjoy everything about santa that everyone else enjoyed:>)
This is a story that my brothers, now in their 70s and 80s still talk about because apparently for them, it was a good lesson.
A couple of them, with a bunch of other young kids, stole some apples from an orchard. Apparently, the owner saw them taking the apples, and could identify my brothers, and not the rest of the group. The police came to our home and demanded that they talk with my brothers, because they wanted the names of the other kids that were involved. My mom told the police that she would take care of punishing "her boys", and they needed to do their job and find out for themselves who else was involved. She could have said "her boys" didn't do it, she could have argued with the police, etc., but she was absolutely truthful, and simply advised the police to do their job and find out for themselves who else was involved. She prevented "her boys" from having to tell on their friends, which she probably knew they would not do...thereby causing themselves more trouble with the police. It's really a silly little story about how we can be totally honest, and sometimes redirect a situation in a more productive way. "Her boys" were punished because they took something that did not belong to them. She made it clear that stealing was not ok AND she did not force them to incriminate their buddies.
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Buttons to start/commit/rollback transactions
|User, date
Written by matsg
2 years ago
Category: Feature discussion
10 posts since Tue, 24 Jan 12
A long time ago I worked with a larger database, the name of which escapes me for the moment (grrr!), but we had a database editor much like HeidiSQL that had buttons for starting a new transactions, and committing and rolling back the same. It kept track of the state too - sort of an indication that "you're in a transaction now, buddy".
We learned to use that function one day when we accidentally deleted all invoices with a due date of the 29th, instead of just a certain category of invoices with the particular due date. Which I'm sure our bank's customers enjoyed, at least those who paid invoices on the 29th. If we had done it in a transaction, we could just have rolled back the changes with that little button.
I've always looked for a similar feature in MySQL clients, but haven't really found any. I guess manually writing "begin" and "commit" works too.. but, seriously, how fun is that? :)
Just a suggestion.
Written by ansgar
2 years ago
5015 posts since Fri, 07 Apr 06
|Thanks for that suggestion. Yes, I could add buttons for everything on the toolbar, even just for writing "SELECT" or whatever. But does that really save time for the user? Finding a button with the mouse tends to take a bit more eye concentration than just typing it yourself, at least if it's some short thing (like "BEGIN" or "COMMIT"). And I said so some times before, I really don't know where to put even more buttons without confusing new users with too much clutter. There are even some experienced users here in the forum which don't find a particular button, e.g. for suppressing error popups. I want to leave the GUI in some good state especially for new users, which won't ever need such buttons for BEGIN/COMMIT.
Written by matsg
2 years ago
10 posts since Tue, 24 Jan 12
I agree with you that screen real-estate is difficult to manage ;)
The advantage of being able to start a transaction with just a push-button is, however, especially advantageous when editing data. I suspect few will switch to the query tab, type "begin", execute it, then head over to the data tab, edit data, and then finally go back to the query tab, type "commit" and execute. So I think such buttons serve a very useful purpose, especially if you get into the habit of doing that. A visual indicator would also make it obvious that you're now working within the scope of a transaction, and what you're doing *can* be rolled back, if you mess up.
I don't know if you're using multiple connections to a database, or if everything is done within one session - the transaction begin/end would affect only editing within that session, of course, so it might be better to tie it visually into the data grid itself somehow.
Written by TTSneko
2 years ago
41 posts since Thu, 19 Jul 12
with all due respect - you are telling me that you actually use a simple database front-end on live customer data?
Real customer data handling is the job of business management software (e.g. SAP-based products, or Navision, etc). With other words, database front-ends like HeidiSQL are not intended to be used by secretaries to run the monthly billing lists - that is the job of fully-fledged application software that restricts access via accounts or provides matching data entry/alteration masks.
Anse's well-set reluctance against UI clutter is one matter, but HeidiSQL simply is not a BMS replacement.
Written by matsg
2 years ago
10 posts since Tue, 24 Jan 12
Well, if we had a professional business system like that, I might reconsider.I am the only developer of the software suite we're using internally, so if I want administration tools I have to write them myself... :P
So a lot of my days are spent running SQL queries on, yes, live data... and editing invoice records, customers records, moving tables and fields and God knows what else that I haven't had time to build proper web interfaces for.
I think that, over time, I've developed a healthy balance of backups and safeguards. Even still, sometimes, things to go wrong, and occasionally I wish that I had tiny little buttons for starting and committing transactions.
I'm all for the "right" way of doing things, have proper testing environments, etc ... but sometimes there just aren't the time or resources for that. :(
Written by matsg
2 years ago
10 posts since Tue, 24 Jan 12
|(P.S. I *have* a testing environment. Just not as extensive as I'd like, but... Just had to add that. :P )
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Bubblegum music is the naked truth : [the dark history of prepubescent pop, from
Cooper, Kim
Adult Nonfiction ML3534 .B7955 2001
Cooper, Kim
Adult Nonfiction ML3534 .B7955 2001
Summary: The truth behind the pop music we love most.
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It's been a long road to completion for the Cedar Valley SportsPlex, but after construction delays, community members gathered for the grand opening on Friday afternoon.
Derek Walgren brought his kids to check it out.
"It will be a nice place for people to come get in shape and it will bring a lot of people into the community," Walgren said. "That's probably the most important part."
He said his kids really liked the pool.
But there's still some work left to be done on the $27.5 million facility, and some have raised concerns that with membership costing nearly $500 dollars per year for an adult, many won't be able to enjoy the SportsPlex.
Others say the extensive features justify the price.
"We think it's very reasonably priced, in fact, some people think it's too cheap, but the reality is we want it to be used," said Dan Watter, President of the Waterloo Development Corporation, which built the facility. "It's for everybody in the community."
SportsPlex officials say they sold 200 memberships in just three hours Friday. Chuck Harp was at the grand opening, and has already signed up.
"I think this is going to be a plus for Waterloo to have this," Harp said.
Regular hours start Saturday morning.


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Ode to Flip Flops
The little bikini, a fluttering cover-up and a pair of irresistibly comfortable flip flops—these make the perfect beach culture uniform. And tread on, because it only gets better:
The new ViX flip flop sandal has finally debuted! Re-designed and offered in the latest Cruise 2013 prints, the ViX flip flop is a softer and more feminine update to the previous style. As a sole made for casual comfort, flip flops have always been the beach beauty's staple.
They have a solid foothold in contemporary footwear, but flip-flops have gained traction all throughout history. Ancient Egyptians referenced thong sandals ...


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Seen from close-up ground level at London Bridge station the Shard is steadily taking its glassy shape. Seen from everywhere else, such as from behind a much older London tower, it is already becoming a familiar part of the London skyline. This evening and tomorrow you can see artist Stephen Wiltshire's drawing of the developing site. Read more about that at SE1. And have a good weekend.
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Jim Carey
Jim Carey started his career in Portland during the 1994-95 season posting a 30-14-11 record, with a 2.76 goals-against average and .909 save percentage. His efforts were honored by the American Hockey League as he was named winner of the Dudley "Red" Garrett Memorial Award (AHL's Rookie of the Year) and the Aldege "Baz" Bastien Memorial Award (Goaltender of the Year). The Pirates also honored Carey with an award as the Most Valuable Player. He was selected to compete in the 1995 AHL All-Star Classic and was named a Post-Season First Team All-Star.
Carey became the Washington Capitals' starting goalie during the 1995-96 season. He posted a 35-24-9 record with a 2.26 save percentage and .906 goals-against average, and received the Vezina Trophy as the NHL's Outstanding Goaltender. He holds the Capitals all-time record for goals-against average in a season (2.37) and shutouts in a season (14). Carey spent portions of his 5-year NHL career with the Washington Capitals, Boston Bruins, and the St. Louis Blues. He also spent time in the AHL with the Portland Pirates and Providence Bruins. His career came to an end as a member of the IHL's Cincinnati Cyclones. In 1999 he played two games with the Cyclones before suffering an inner ear concussion and never returned to professional hockey.
No other goaltender has compiled as many awards and honors in a single season in Pirates history. Carey and Olaf Kolzig are the only two Pirates alum that have captured a major NHL award (Vezina Trophy).


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This Day In History: Mr. October Hits Three Homers in Three Swings (History.com)
On October 18, 1977, in the sixth game of the World Series against the Los Angeles Dodgers, New York Yankees outfielder Reggie Jackson hits three home runs in a row off of three consecutive pitches from three different pitchers. Only the great Babe Ruth had ever hit three homers in a single World Series game (and he did it twice, once in 1926 and once in 1928) —but he didn't do it on consecutive pitches or even consecutive at-bats. Jackson's amazing home-run streak helped the Yankees win the game and the series, the team's first since 1962.
During his pre-game batting practice, Jackson was unstoppable: He stepped to the plate and immediately knocked three pitches high into Yankee Stadium's third-tier seats. Then he smacked the next one hard into the rear wall of the right-field bleachers. Jackson kept on pounding homers into the stands—so many that that backup catcher Fran Healy was reminded of the old baseball adage that the better you hit in batting practice, the worse you hit when it counts. As a result, Healy later recalled, "I thought to myself, 'Boy, is he gonna have a horseshit game.'"
But he didn't. In the second inning, Dodger pitcher Burt Hooten managed to palm Jackson off with a walk, but on his next at-bat, in the fourth, the slugger nailed Hooten's first pitch low and hard into the right-field bleachers--"a line drive," Los Angeles Times reporter Jim Murray wrote, "that would have crossed state lines and gone through the side of a battleship on its way to the seats." In the fifth, with two out and two on, Jackson treated reliever Elias Sosa's first pitch the same way. And in the eighth, he emerged from the dugout to a standing ovation, reached down for pitcher Charlie Hough's diving knuckleball, and sent it flying 450 feet into the center-field bleachers. It was, Murray wrote, a "booming Jack Nicklaus-type tee shot, high and far, the kind that pitchers wake up screaming in the middle of the night over."
That last homer put the Yanks in the lead 8-3, and—in spite of the ubiquitous security guards and policemen in riot gear who lined the first- and third-base lines—the stadium was about to explode. It got so bad that Jackson had to come in from the outfield during the last inning and get a batting helmet to protect his head from the cherry bombs and firecrackers that the bleacher creatures were throwing onto the field. When the game ended, the field flooded with fans. They had a new hero: Reggie Jackson, now known as "Mr. October."
In his 21-year career, Jackson hit 563 home runs and retired as the all-time leader in Series slugging, with a .755 average. And no one ever achieved what he did in 1977: three home runs in three swings, and five homers in all in the series. Still, Jackson was uncharacteristically modest. "Babe Ruth was great," he said. "I'm just lucky."
Top 10 Real Events that Inspired Scary Movies (TopTenz.net)
The term "horror movie" first appeared in the writings of critics in response to the release of Universal's Dracula (1931) and Frankenstein (1931). The term has since come to describe any film that strives to elicit the emotion of fear, disgust, and shock. A large collection of classic scary movies have screenplays that are based on real life events. Some of the most popular fictional serial killers and horror movie franchises have been inspired by people. This article will examine ten historic events that were used in scary movies.
10. Sawney Bean
Inspired: The Hills Have Eyes
Sawney Bean was the head of a 48-member clan that lived in Scotland during the 15th or 16th century. He was reportedly executed for the mass murder and cannibalization of over 1,000 people. The story of Sawney Bean appears in The Newgate Calendar, a crime catalogue of the Newgate Prison in London. Legend says that the family came to include eight sons, six daughters, eighteen grandsons and fourteen granddaughters. The group lived in the mountains and thrived on ambushes and murder. The victims were brought back to their cave, dismembered, and cannibalized.
One evening, the clan ambushed a married couple and the man was able to fight off the group with a sword and pistol. He escaped and reported the events to the authorities. It wasn't long before King James VI of Scotland (later James I of England) led a manhunt into the area with a team of 400 men. The group discovered the Beans' cave in Bannane Head. It was rife with human remains, having been the scene of hundreds of murders and cannibalistic acts. The clan was captured alive and taken in chains to the Tolbooth Jail in Edinburgh, then transferred to Glasgow where they were promptly executed without a trial. Some historians look back on the story and believe Sawney Bean never existed.
The Movie: The Hills Have Eyes
In 1977, Wes Craven directed a horror film titled The Hills Have Eyes. The movie tells the story of a large family on a road trip that becomes stranded in the Nevada desert. After meeting a group of people, the family is hunted by a clan of deformed cannibals in the surrounding hills. Craven wrote the screenplay based on the legendary tale of Sawney Bean. He decided to place the clan in the American desert and made them into a cult. In the movie the killers include dozens of incestuous family members, similar to the Sawney Bean story.
9. Star Jelly
Inspired: The Blob
Star jelly is a gelatinous substance, which, according to reports, is deposited on the Earth during some meteor showers. It is described as a translucent or grayish white gelatin which tends to evaporate shortly after having fallen. Explanations for star jelly have ranged from a natural byproduct to a paranormal substance. Since the 14th century, star jelly has been reported in various locations around the world. Ancient civilizations used it as a medicine. Star jelly doesn't have a scientific classification. However, one possible explanation is slime moulds, which appear suddenly and exhibit a gelatinous appearance.
The Movie: The Blob
In 1950, four Philadelphia, Pennsylvania policemen reported the discovery of "a domed disk of quivering jelly, 6 feet in diameter and one foot thick at the center." When the men touched the substance it dissolved into an "odorless, sticky scum." In 1958, the story inspired a collection of filmmakers to develop an independent movie named The Blob. The Blob is a horror/science-fiction film that depicts a giant amoeba-like alien that terrorizes the small community of Phoenixville, Pennsylvania. Irvine H. Millgate is credited with the story. Millgate was a friend of producer Jack H. Harris. He was inspired after reading a 1950 article about the Philadelphia star jelly incident.
The Blob (1958) was Steve McQueen's debut leading role and also starred Aneta Corsaut. The movie was a box office success and earned $4 million on an $110,000 budget. The film has had a lasting impact on the genre of science fiction and cult horror. A number of great storytellers have identified The Blob as an inspiration for their work. A comedy sequel to the movie was made in 1972, titled Beware! The Blob, directed by Larry Hagman. In 1988, a remake was released directed by Chuck Russell. Star jelly is also thought to have inspired themes in the film Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978). In the movie, alien spores fall to Earth in a rain shower and form blobs of jelly that produce alien seed pods.
8. Charles Starkweather and Caril Ann Fugate
Inspired: Natural Born Killers
Charles Starkweather was born and raised in Lincoln, Nebraska. At the age of 18 Charles was introduced to a 13-year-old girl named Caril Ann Fugate. The following year he entered the Crest Service Station in Lincoln, Nebraska, robbed the store, took the clerk hostage, and executed him in a remote area outside the city. On January 21, 1958, Starkweather murdered Fugate's mother, stepfather, and 2-year-old sister. According to the testimony given at Fugate's trial, she did not take part in the murder of her family, but did help bury the bodies around the house. After hiding for a week, the couple went on a killing spree across Nebraska. Starkweather and Fugate murdered eleven people in a two-month span. They were eventually captured in Douglas, Wyoming in early 1958.
Upon their arrest, Starkweather claimed that Fugate had nothing to do with the murder spree. However, he later changed his story and testified against her. Starkweather said that Fugate committed half of the murders. He accused her of having a happy trigger finger. In 1958, Charles Starkweather received the death penalty for the murder of Robert Jensen. Fugate received a life sentence for her role in the crimes. Caril's jail time was eventually commuted, which allowed her to be paroled in June 1976. She remains the youngest female in United States history to have been tried for first-degree murder. Charles Starkweather was executed by way of the electric chair in Lincoln, Nebraska, on June 25, 1959.
The Movie: Natural Born Killers
Since his death, a collection of films have been inspired by the Starkweather-Fugate murder spree, including The Sadist (1963), Badlands (1973), and Natural Born Killers (1994). Natural Born Killers is a movie directed by Oliver Stone. It tells the story of two traumatized children who become psychopathic serial killers. The film is notorious for its violence and was named the 8th most controversial movie of all time by Entertainment Weekly. Natural Born Killers was promoted with the tagline: "A bold new film that takes a look at a country seduced by fame, obsessed by crime, and consumed by the media."
Read more here.
Finalists Unveiled for 2011 National Book Awards (Reuters.com)
Organizers for the National Book Awards on Wednesday announced the 20 finalists for 2011's honors, which are among the most prestigious in U.S. publishing.
Winners in four categories -- fiction, nonfiction, poetry and young people's literature -- will be announced at a gala event held in New York on November 16 and hosted by actor John Lithgow. Finalists in their respective categories follow:
Andrew Krivak, "The Sojourn"
Tea Obreht, "The Tiger's Wife"
Julie Otsuka, "The Buddha in the Attic"
Edith Pearlman, "Binocular Vision"
Jesmyn Ward, "Salvage the Bones"
Deborah Baker, "The Convert: A Tale of Exile and Extremism"
Mary Gabriel, "Love and Capital: Karl and Jenny Marx and the Birth of a Revolution"
Stephen Greenblatt, "Swerve: How the World Became Modern"
Manning Marable, "Malcolm X: A Life of Reinvention"
Lauren Redniss, "Radioactive: Marie & Pierre Curie: A Tale of Love and Fallout"
Nikky Finney, "Head Off & Split"
Yusef Komunyakaa, "The Chameleon Couch"
Carl Phillips, "Double Shadow"
Adrienne Rich, "Tonight No Poetry Will Serve: Poems 2007-2010"
Bruce Smith, "Devotions"
Franny Billingsley, "Chime"
Debby Dahl Edwardson, "My Name Is Not Easy"
Thanhha Lai, "Inside Out and Back Again"
Albert Marrin, "Flesh and Blood So Cheap: The Triangle Fire and Its Legacy"
Lauren Myracle, "Shine"
Gary D. Schmidt, "Okay for Now"
(Reporting by Christine Kearney, editing by Bob Tourtellotte)
TV, Game Profanity Can Lead to Cussing, Meanness (CNN.com)
Swearing in television programs and video games can lead adolescents to adopt the coarse language and can also influence aggressive behavior according to a study published Monday in the journal Pediatrics.
"We didn't know this before and I was really surprised because we've got all these ratings for television, film and video games for profanity," said study author Sarah Coyne, Ph.D., assistant professor of family life at Brigham Young University and researcher of media and human development.
She added that a lot of the time, the ratings are incorrect.
"I think as a society we've gotten really lax concerning profanity," she added. "I think it's in part because we hear it all over the media."
Researchers surveyed more 222 children ages 11 to 15 from a large Midwestern middle school. 135 of the participants were girls.
The students were asked about their favorite shows and games, including how often they watch television and play the games. They were asked how much profanity they thought they were exposed to and about their feelings about profanity. Researchers determined that exposure and their stance on profanity were significantly related.
Coyne said the statistics point to a "trickle-down effect."
"So maybe you watch television, play video games with a lot of profanity and kind of you get more used to it," she said. "You get more desensitized to it, you become more accepting of it, then you kind of start using it in your own life and then kind of show the lack of respect for people."
The study found aggression could be presented physically - hitting, kicking or punching. However, it could also show in the form of relational aggression like gossiping or spreading rumors about someone.
"I think that parents should be a little bit more aware of what's out there in the programs our kids are watching, and the video games they're playing," Coyne added. "They could be a little more vigilant in terms of profanity exposure.
She adds that television and video games need to be more accurately labeled for profanity.
America's Five Most Haunted Hotels (Yahoo.com)
Kerri Fivecoat-Campbell
If you're into things that go bump in the night, there is no better time of the year than Halloween to stay in a purportedly haunted hotel.
Paranormal tourism not only gives traveling ghost hunters a chance for an encounter with something otherworldly, ghost tours routinely provide a wealth of knowledge about the history of the town and establishment as well.
MainStreet took a look at five of the most haunted hotels in America and their spooky stories. If you want to stay in a haunted hotel, book soon because Halloween will sneak up on you like a ... well, like a ghost.
Read on if you dare:
The 1886 Crescent Hotel and Spa
Eureka Springs, Ark.
Ghost tour leaders on the nightly excursions through the hotel tell visitors that the professional ghost hunters from the television show proclaimed this luxury hotel-turned-school-turned-cancer-hospital-turned-hotel as the third most haunted building they had ever investigated.
The hotel is one of the only places the team supposedly caught a full-bodied apparition on infrared camera. Those aren't the only cameras capturing spirits though, as guests routinely share photos of ghostly faces and orbs - round balls of light thought by some to be spirits. Many of the photos can be seen on the website or in the "ghost book" at the front desk.
One of the most playful ghosts to inhabit the grounds is Michael, a young Irish stonemason who came to America to help build the hotel. According to legend, when he leaned over the landing to see a pretty girl passing by, he fell to his death near room 218, one of the rooms with the most reported paranormal activity.
Another part of the hotel that is haunted involves the area on the 4th floor in which Dr. Baker, who wasn't actually a doctor, lived when he converted the hotel to a cancer hospital. Under his care in the 1930s and 40s, it is thought that nearly 300 residents died there. Baker, along with some of his patients and nurses, have reportedly been seen roaming the halls as ghosts. One patient has been seen numerous times fumbling for her keys outside of room 419. Recently, a little girl who was visiting the hotel with her parents began talking to someone in their room who the mother could not see. The parents concluded from the girl's description and reported conversation that she had seen Irene Castle, a famous ballroom dancer of the 1920s who was later depicted in a movie by Ginger Rogers. Castle frequented the hotel in her later years and died at her nearby home in 1969. Perhaps she is one of the spectral dancers who have been heard in the ballroom late at night.
The hotel also houses a former morgue where autopsies were performed and bodies were stored, with some reportedly taken and hidden on the grounds to conceal the actual mortality rate at the facility. Believers typically have some sort of experience at the hotel, say staff members and skeptics - well, they have been known to leave in a hurry in the middle of the night.
2. Buxton Inn
Granville, Ohio
Audrey and Orville Orr, owners of the Buxton Inn since 1972, said they never advertise their inn as haunted, but the stories of the ghosts that inhabit the 199-year-old building have gotten around, resulting in recognition by TripAdvisor.com as one of The 10 Most Haunted Hotels in America.
Orville Orr said that when he and his wife first purchased the property, they didn't even want to talk about the strange happenings at the hotel, being of a conservative background. Even when he saw the apparitions for his own eyes, he says he didn't want to believe it. "I couldn't understand it."
The inn was originally a tavern and has operated continuously since 1812, on a major road heading west through which many supplies were traded and travelers passed. By 1972, there was talk of razing the building for a parking lot, but the Orrs stepped in and completed a full authentic restoration of the four buildings and 25 guest rooms.
Major Buxton was one of the owners and operators of the inn from 1865-1902 and can periodically still be spotted on the first floor of the main building. Ethel "Bonnie" Bounell was an owner from 1934-1960 and her favorite scent of gardenias can still sometimes be smelled wafting through the hallways.
The Orrs have long made peace with their permanent guests. "A psychic told us we don't want to get rid of them, they like coming back to visit," says Orville. The Orrs wish to respect their predecessors' dignity by not hyping the ghosts, but they don't mind when the curious come to see if they can experience them, too.
3. The Brown Palace Hotel & Spa
Built in 1892 by a well-known Denverite named Henry C. Brown, the Brown Palace Hotel & Spa has been a temporary stop for every president since Teddy Roosevelt, with the exception of Calvin Coolidge. The Beatles even have a suite named for them, as they stayed at the hotel during a tour stop in the 1960s.
Many believe the hotel has a connection to the "unsinkable" Molly Brown, the Denver socialite who survived the 1912 Titanic disaster, but that is just legend, says hotel management.
While none of their purported ghosts are believed to be legendary singers or former presidents, one is believed to be Louise Crawford Hill, another Denver socialite who took up residence there in the 1930s when the top two floors were converted to apartments.
The front desk has reported calls coming from Room 904, the room Hill occupied during the times when ghost tour operators are telling the story of her scandalous affair. It wouldn't be so creepy if the 9th floor hadn't been under renovation at the time, with the wires all stripped from the entire top two floors.
Others have reported seeing a train conductor wearing clothes from the turn of the century walking through the lobby. He is believed to be a visitor who came to the hotel when a train depot operated near the hotel. Still other visitors have reported gas fireplaces turning on by themselves and music emanating from the restaurant late at night.
4. The Myrtles Plantation
St. Francisville, La.
Many of the country's haunted places are in the historic southern states, and ghost hunters have long designated the Myrtles Plantation as one of the nation's most haunted. The plantation, built in 1796 by General David Bradford, was reportedly built on a former Native American burial ground and when Whiskey Dave's workers discovered them, he ordered them burned. That in itself is enough to bring on restless spirits, they say.
The most famous of ghosts who inhabit the Myrtles, however, is Chloe, a former slave who had a romance with Bradford's son-in-law. Scared of being banished from the home to the fields, the story goes, Chloe began eavesdropping on her lover's private conversations. Her lover and master caught her, drew a sword and cut off her ear. More desperate to show her worth to the family, she baked a poisoned birthday cake for one of the children, hoping to nurse the sick family members back to health. Instead, the wife and two of her children died.
Her fellow slaves, fearing retribution, lynched Chloe from a chandelier in one of the rooms, and since then is said to have been photographed numerous times at the inn, still wearing the turban she wore to cover her severed ear. The chandelier in that room has been reported to sway back and forth in the middle of the night for no reason as well.
Other ghosts, including children who died from then-incurable diseases, are also reported to roam the halls of the Myrtles. If you stay in one of the 11 guest rooms, make sure to book your spot on the ghost tour early and if you run across a woman wearing a turban or see balls rolling across the floor on their own, think nothing of it. The owners say their ghosts are harmless.
5. Hotel del Coronado
San Diego
Built in 1888, the Hotel del Coronado was known in the late 19th century and early 20th century for a resort for anyone who was anyone and took months to travel the vast space between the East and West Coasts. The Hotel del Coronado even once had its own school to teach the children of their most long-term guests.
Since that era, some of those long-term guests have apparently never left, bringing their occupancy into the afterlife. One of the most famous of the hotel's ghosts is said to be Kate Morgan, a lovesick woman who checked into the hotel in 1892. She waited for five days for the love of her life to meet her; he never did and Kate was found dead at the bottom of an exterior staircase leading to the beach.
Since then, Kate's ghost has been reported on the beach and in the hotel, and when she is feeling particularly feisty she plays harmless pranks on guests, says the hotel's management.
Another hot spot for paranormal activity is the hotel gift shop, where crystal routinely flies off of the shelves and pictures fall off of the walls. The target seems to be souvenirs of the movie Some Like It Hot starring Marilyn Monroe, which was filmed at the hotel in 1958. Marilyn's ghost, perhaps? Hotel management doesn't think so. They believe whoever's ghost it is just doesn't like sharing the limelight with the 20th century beauty.


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By knoldus
via blog.knoldus.com
Published: Nov 08 2012 / 08:47
The Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs (http://mitpress.mit.edu/sicp/full-text/book/book.html) is a seminal book which helps you reason and understand the structure of computer programs. Though the book has been written a while back but the content is refreshingly applicable to the modern programming languages like Scala. The github project, provides solutions to the following problems * Exercise 1.5 and 1.6 at http://mitpress.mit.edu/sicp/full-text/book/book-Z-H-10.html * Exercise 1.10 at http://mitpress.mit.edu/sicp/full-text/book/book-Z-H-11.html * Exercises 1.34, 1.38, 1.41, 1.42 and 1.43 at http://mitpress.mit.edu/sicp/full-text/book/book-Z-H-12.html
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When Spartan Race founder Joe De Sena issued the challenge of riding his bike from Texas to Vermont for the Reebok Spartan Race World Championships, Isaiah Vidal jumped at the chance. "I shook his hand immediately. I knew it was something I had to do."
His journey would take him from Central Texas to the small town of Pittsfield, Vermont, home to the Peak Death Race, an event that Isaiah has completed in the past. It took 16 days, and 133 hours of bike time to make the trek that wasn't without its fair share of mishaps.
On day 15 he posted on Facebook, "Made it to Amsterdam, New York unfortunately how I got here was the most dangerous thing I have ever done and its one to always remember. Its 7:30pm and I biked 20 miles In the rain and it was getting dark….. Yeah I know it was risky, but I wasn't going to let this rain stop me anymore."
Flat tires, loose pedals and heavy rain didn't deter Vidal from finishing what he set out to accomplish. When he arrived in Pittsfield September 14, he had mixed feelings. "I'm here in Pittsfield the place I call my second home due to many accomplishments I've made here. It feels weird being social with other people. Not being on the bike is a relief, but…we must overcome anything that we put ourselves in or we are thrown in no matter the pain or suffering."
With the help of friends on the way, and warm wishes and encouragement from family, friends, and supporters following his journey he has arrived! Now that he's settled into Vermont, he has just a few short days to prepare for the Reebok Spartan Race World Championships where he will be representing Mexico in the elite heat!
More to come on this incredible journey!
Tags: Elite, Isaiah Vidal, Mexico, Peak Death Race, Reebok Spartan Race, World Championships


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UPDATE: Sasquatch passed away from his injuries on Saturday morning. Kim Conner wrote on her Facebook:
prayers and words mean so much. Sometimes the answer to our prayers ins
not the one we want to hear. BUT it is always the right answer. All our
prayers were answered in a way. The poor little guy in no longer in
pain. It is with a heavy heart I reach out to all who have been
following our little horse's brave fight for life. This morning at
Auburn University he lost his battle. He has succumbed to his injuries,
In true Sasquatch style he went on his own terms and in his sleep. The
vets at Auburn were right there and it was very fast. Our hearts are
broken and we will miss our sweet sweet little man. I am at a loss for words."
A miniature horse used in therapy for children was severely injured by a pack of dogs. The Conners found their family pet, Sasquatch, surrounded by four stray dogs early Friday."It was unreal. I've had horses for 40 years and I've never seen anything like this," said Kim Conner.Kim Conner tracked down the dogs -- now quarantined at animal control – and then drove Sasquatch to Auburn University Hospital."He's extreme critical. They've given him about a 50/50 chance," Conner said.Little Sasquatch - who only stands 33 inches tall - is a big part of the Fairywood Thicket Farm's therapy program. He works with children and disabled veterans. Farm owners say that recently, the area has become overrun by far too many strays. They hope their scare sends a strong message to those abandoning their animals."The problem is people keep dumping these animals out here and we're left to clean up the mess, and you don't know what you're going to get. And now my little pony paid the price for somebody who didn't take care of their dog," said Kim Conner.Fidelity Bank in Sandy Springs has set up a fund through the nonprofit for Sasquatch to help with vet bills. The farm will likely face thousands of dollars in vet bills. If Sasquatch survives, the mini-horse will need at least six months of rehab therapy. Donations can be made to the account for Fairywood Thicket Equestrian Center, Inc.
WJBK-TV | Fox 2 16550 West Nine Mile Rd.Southfield, MI 48075Main Station: (248) 557-2000Newsroom: (248) 552-5103


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- russell lester
- Manson, WA
- United States
Orchardist, Grange
This conversation is closed.
Idea: Global property tax to support environmental reform
The idea I am kicking around is to establish a global agency, perhaps a party to the world court which would assess a tax on each person globally say one one thousandth of there properties value (local market value) times the estimated shares of mean carbon production they are responsible for, which would i grant you be hard to quantify, maybe it could be based on a per capita national average.
The tax could be levied against nations wishing to or having ever used the world court, and could be once a decade or whatever time interval seems good, the revenues would be available for the world courts foundation managers to disperse to address credit challenged projects that are of great environmental value.
Closing Statement from russell lester
Corperations constrained and taxed more here than anywhere else in the world. Which is why they put manufacturing in China. 25% or more of the pollution over Los Angeles comes from China. Problem is that the China is not under the purview of California law,
I have a rare book, it is called international Anarchy and it was written and published in the interval between the end of the first world war and the failure of the united states to ratify and empower the league of nations. The premise is that conflicts wars and struggles over the sea and air can be avoided if the nations agree to a code of law and mutually enforce it. This does not even require the individual nations to give up sovereignty, just the right to launch wars of aggression, and perhaps its time to include pollution of air water land and bio spheres to the list of mutually outlawed actions. Certainly I can see that you cannot fix problems by simply redistributing wealth, or at least not all problems, but what would the harm be in providing an incentive for developing nations to not pursue programs we know now are destructive to everyone? After all the wealth of the rich nations and the rich in those nations was made on the resources of other nations from time to time, plus it was the process of amassing that wealth or more accurately the process' which were used to do so which have caused such wide spread damage.
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Nov 6 2012: The state I live in has driven industries and jobs and productive people and wealth out of the state in droves by just the kind of thinking you are espousing. This year the state started cap and trade, a legacy left by Schwarzenegger, that will further drive business out of the state.
This type of thinking stems from socialist equality we know best what to do with other people's money mentality. Which is a delusion.
The first thing that a person who comes up with what we should all do is first find out what he is talking about which you have not. Knowledge on this subject is not acquired by dilettantes it requires hard work and genuine thinking and listening.
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Due to the House remaining in session tomorrow "to consider an energy bill, delaying the start of the August recess by a day," Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Congressman Rahm Emanuel are officially canceling their scheduled YearlyKos Convention appearances. Sen. Charles Schumer may still be able to attend the Ask The Leaders forum, but convention organziers will not know for sure until late Friday evening.
Reid, Pelosi and Emanuel to miss YearlyKos.
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Sometimes women have a hard time just outright admitting how much she likes someone. Although we really don't like it when men do it to us, we can be just as bad with sending a guy mixed signals and being vague.
So how can men tell when a woman really likes him? Sadly, just because she is agreeing to go out on a date doesn't necessarily mean she actually likes you. There are other ways to tell she is happy you are in her life though:
1. She is genuinely concerned about your well-being. You may notice that she pays attention to something you need and then fulfill those needs.
2. She doesn't criticize you harshly. Women definitely pay attention to your behavior and can see when you are acting like a bonehead. When she likes you, she can call you out in a respectful manner, handling your ego with care.
3. She doesn't make outrageous demands on you to prove to her you like her. A really smart woman does not require a man to spend a boatload of cash on her. In fact, when she really likes you, she will treat you and pay for things. If you feel like a sponsor after only a few months of dating, it's probably because you are.
Ladies, how can men tell when a woman really likes him? How do you let a man know that you are truly interested? What ways to you show him?
Men, do you know when a woman is leading you on? Can you tell when she is interested in you, for who you are?
It's not fun being used by anyone, how can we manage to avoid that in dating?
November 23rd, 2009
8:58 am
Happy Monday!
How do you let a man know that you are truly interested? What ways to you show him?
Hmmm I don't do anything special to let a person know that I am interested…I just tell him I am interested…the end
Although I am a bit shy I will say this if I am interested in a man it always comes out sooner or later. Plus whatever we do is fun to me whether we ride around looking at houses and tripping out, or if I show him some of the hidden treasures here in GA…simply put the ability to enjoy each other's company without all the bravado.
November 23rd, 2009
8:58 am
Ohhhh me first!
November 23rd, 2009
9:21 am
So, it's just the men you don't like that you want to spend boatloads of cash on you? Why don't I find this surprising?
November 23rd, 2009
9:27 am
This is a crazy post, WD. What gives? Did you get kicked in the head at the rodeo or something?
November 23rd, 2009
9:32 am
This is an interesting topic. As you said WD, "just because she is agreeing to go out on a date doesn't necessarily mean she actually likes you". This is true because women will take a free dinner even if they dont like a guy. Just because she goes out with me doesnt mean she likes me, it just means she is human and has an appetitie!
Men, do you know when a woman is leading you on? Can you tell when she is interested in you, for who you are?
Honestly, it is hard to know when a woman is leading you on. But one aspect to always watch out for is the flakiness. If a woman is acting flakely or playing the busy game, she really is not that interested.
It's not fun being used by anyone, how can we manage to avoid that in dating?
I think from a male perspective, we can avoid being used by simply not giving to much to fast and to early. Guys need to qualify women more rather than automatically give them everything. We have to not put so much stock into her early. That way if it doesnt work out, then we really havent lost much. I did not say dont put any EFFORT into dating her, but I am saying dont give her your life either. A common mistake that I have made and I am sure other guys have made is giving a woman to much UNWARRANTED attention to soon. Let them earn your time guys and stop being so eager!
November 23rd, 2009
9:38 am
Maybe it's the way I'm reading this, but wondering if someone 'likes me' seems kind of high schoolish. Grown folks take the risk, throw the signals and test the waters. By this stage in the game we've learned to know who is interested us and who isn't because our advances have either been accepted or rejected over the years. If our efforts are rejected. We keep on truckin'-
November 23rd, 2009
9:50 am
Three Words Daily – Know the rules.
November 23rd, 2009
10:07 am
GM All!
I'm with Professor on this one. What's wrong with me just telling you how I feel and you trusting that I'm not playing games???
November 23rd, 2009
10:11 am
M.Dot – Cosigning the last paragraph of your 932a. It goes both ways.
November 23rd, 2009
10:16 am
Great comment.
As far as the "leading me on" she can only take me as far as I let her.
If I'm fool enough to invest heavily in someone without any (or not enough) reciprocity, then that's on me.
I only bet what I can afford to lose.
'Supper Folks!
November 23rd, 2009
10:23 am
I only bet what I can afford to lose
right on the money!
Morning gang!!
November 23rd, 2009
10:23 am
He likes me, he likes me not, he likes me, he likes me not
Morning all!
NY2GA, Inc. pretty much summed it up for me….
November 23rd, 2009
10:26 am
This has to be either the funniest or saddest column I have ever read about relationships. It's obvious the author has never had a "real" relationship with a "real" man, and at least half or the posters haven't either. All this posturing, posing, preening and pouting! No wonder you're confused.
This is the "dating scene you people subscribe to? Really? Really!?!
Real people are confident enough to let other people know who they are, and are strong enough to handle the truth.
Real people don't need validation from a date or a GF/BF.
Real people know that if you're looking for something specific, the odds of finding what you're looking for decrease.
Real people don't need to play games, and they will leave you flat on your arse if you start playing them, unless they just want a short term companion for a specific reason.
If you really want to get to know someone, and see how compatible you are, take a trip together for 3 or 4 days. And not a 5 star resort. Something a little grittier. Go on a few dates that take you out of your comfort zones. Loosen up and have a real conversation.
Real men can handle the occasional emotional outburst. But if you're psycho, go get treatment, or he will leave you flat on your arse in heartbeat.
It sounds like the author and half of the respondents on here never emotionally left high school.
That's my two cents. And I'm secure enough to say it.
November 23rd, 2009
10:30 am
Good morning everyone! I have played chauffeur the ENTIRE weekend. I think I need to get lil leggs a bigger bike (j/k).
Anyway, I'm one for telling you I like you with verbal and non-verbal communication. My time spent with you, my attentiveness to your likes and dislikes will tell you if I'm interested.
@M ~ you are on point with your last paragraph.
November 23rd, 2009
10:36 am
What up Blog Fam! Dating is just not that hard people. You see, you like, you ask then go from there….
Real people wipe the back of their ears and then smell their fangas
Real people dig into their nose and thump boogers
Real people dig food out between their teeth and eat it
Sorry I couldn't help myself
November 23rd, 2009
10:37 am
I agree with M (dot). Yes, many women would take free dinners even if they don't like the guy. They say if a guy "wants to pay for my company, I let him" (someone's exact words). Do the women actually make it clear to these guys that that's why they are going out with him???
LMAO has some valid points too (real people are confident enough to let other people know who they are, and are strong enough to handle the truth and don't need validation from a date or a GF/BF).
Yes, I did leave the above-mentioned girl "flat on her arse in a heartbeat".
November 23rd, 2009
10:37 am
Folks I think we have to factor in all of the players when we talk about the datinggame:
So here are a few of the players, which I feel cause people to hold back and not say how they feel because they are afraid of being hurt or taken advantage of:
1. Wounded…once bitten twice-shy person…this person is ready but afraid to make the first move. They are simply protecting themselves from hurt and pain.
2. Just want company type…if you can't be with the one you love than love the one you with person this person has not dealt with their heartache and just want someone there to ease the pain. If you date this person you are merely being a court jester as this person (a) get back with the one they love or (b) find someone more compatible.
3. Looking for $$$ or S3X…money money money money as the O'jays say it or you sing Lyfe with me girl (insert boy) its just your s.e.x we have all seen this person around town…looking for the vulnerable and the low self esteem person to use and sometimes abuse.
4. Lame goes Hollywood…Atlanta can make those that were once lame in high school become top tier with the right clothes, car etc. Well these folks are superficial and they are only looking for someone cute to hang on their arm, because they never had the cheerleader or jock in high school so now it is a game to conquer and see what they missed out on
5. Firecracker…The romance starts off hot and heavy and it crash quickly. Like a firecracker it lights up the sky and it is beautiful, but it goes out fast and it leaves the participant feeling like what happened. Nothing happened you started out hot, fast and heavy and the life cycle played out.
Now you might ask, Professor I have experienced this before and why so. Well my darling you did not take time to analyze your date. Also I will add it is possible to experience one or more of these at the same time!
November 23rd, 2009
10:41 am
Well dayum (in my Gucci voice), I guess she likes me!
November 23rd, 2009
10:42 am
If I don't like you, I'm not eating with you! You can keep your dining dollars.
November 23rd, 2009
10:45 am
I usually take a woman out for drinks or coffee (depending on the time of day) on the first date. That way, we can see if we have enough compatibility/chemistry (from both sides) to go on a second one. After 3 dates, I see if she at least offers to pitch in (eg., cover the tip or pay for drinks if I pay for dinner, etc.). If not…
I do see many women trying to talk me into taking them to a concert or a fancy restaurant on the first date. They never get a call back.
November 23rd, 2009
10:46 am
Leggs, good and respectable attitude, but not many think like that…
November 23rd, 2009
10:52 am
Re: LMAO in ATL…
Thanks for saving me all the typing. Couldn't have said it better and won't try.
November 23rd, 2009
10:52 am
What happens, if, after three dates, she doesn't offer to pay anything but on Date Four cooks you a homemade meal?
And once, you become intimate and you start staying over and waking up some Saturday mornings at her house and she makes breakfast on those mornings, do you offer to buy some milk and eggs after the third time?
I'm just saying…
November 23rd, 2009
11:03 am
Using past relationships…and considering things I have done (just my natural/knee jerk responses) in the past when I enjoyed a guys company
1. I am available to hang out with you on the regular bases.
2. If I trust you, I fall back and am agreeable, not because I want you to lead or because I'm scared, but because I trust you to lead and I feel secure with you (and your ability to lead)…I try to contain it…but sometimes I get all old school girly
3. On small matters, I take one for the team (don't call you out), even when you're wrong… For instance, if we end up being the couple barely making the intro and needing the usher with the flashlight to get us to our seats cuz you took a "shortcut" to get us there…sorry I digressed…but you know what I mean…speed walkin in the isles, bumpin folks knees and blockin the view and whatnot.
I can't say that these are mature or good/bad signs, but just observations about myself.
November 23rd, 2009
11:03 am
I think it's sad that just because one is hungry one would accept a date and blatanly use someone for a meal or even a chance to get out of the house. Hell, stay home and cook yourself something to eat and entertain your damn self. Sorry, I don't like using people.
November 23rd, 2009
11:04 am
but on Date Four cooks you a homemade meal?
shes In,…I mean In….She's All In
aint that right WD??
November 23rd, 2009
11:05 am
Yes, I certainly would, SexyCool. What I meant was whether she actually brings something to the table (not necessarily money). I thought that was implied.
November 23rd, 2009
11:07 am
I think it's sad that just because one is hungry one would accept a date and blatanly use someone for a meal or even a chance to get out of the house.
Now that's some funny ish.. Men using women for s!x and women using men for a plate…
November 23rd, 2009
11:07 am
Sexycool, there's nothing that says "I care about you" than cooking them a meal. That's awesome and far surpasses any pitching she would do with money!
Leggs, sad as it does seem, going out just because one gets a free meal is much more common than you would think!
November 23rd, 2009
11:09 am
"Men using women for s!x and women using men for a plate…"
Dream, that's true, except some women eat the meal and go home – without "give it up". My ex used to do that to her ex.
November 23rd, 2009
11:11 am
Dream your 11:07 says it all! Not to mention we do have some hungry men out here on the dating scene as well.
I will add this to the topic…If I know someone is going through a difficult time, problems at work, death in the family, winter blues etc. I will chime in and treat them to a nice dinner…maybe homemade or a decent steak if that is something they like. However I have seen some folks try to even take advantage of that small gesture.
November 23rd, 2009
11:13 am
Oh…and on the concert thing, if it's a concert that I want to see, I'm paying.
November 23rd, 2009
11:15 am
I think I have been sheltered…after three dates do folks really spend the night with each other and cook breakfast in the morning…I was thinking you send them packing to Ihop or something?
I cannot see anyone sleeping on my sheets after three dates and using things around my home I am still trying to get to know them I don't need to meet their body parts that soon and have their dead skin cells falling around my house.
November 23rd, 2009
11:17 am
Scool~ are you paying for both tickets or will you suggest going dutch as it relates to the concert?
November 23rd, 2009
11:18 am
I have the winter blues, and like my steak medium rare…..
November 23rd, 2009
11:19 am
And on the going out for a meal with someone that I didn't like, that was a waste of my life. I'd rather stay at home and eat a bologna sandwich than spend my time with someone who I don't want to be interested in.
That being said, I have allowed some of my FZ dudes treat me to the occasional meal and am perfectly fine with it. (They knew what position they played when they called me up and asked me out.)
November 23rd, 2009
11:20 am
We must have been sheltered in the same location then
November 23rd, 2009
11:21 am
Prof – If I like a dude enough to suggest a concert to him, then I am going to pay for both tickets.
Otherwise, I won't even mention it other than to say, "Yeah, me and my bff are going to the concert next week."
November 23rd, 2009
11:21 am
Good tying the topic into the post, Melo!
November 23rd, 2009
11:24 am
"He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools will be destroyed."
Proverbs 13:20 (KJV)
Monday November 23
Today's Focus: Spiritual Life
Peer pressure is often viewed negatively; however, there is a positive aspect. The old adage, "Association leads to assimilation" is quite true. We become like those we hang around. If you want to grow spiritually, surround yourself with individuals who are actively praying, reading the Word, and aiming to live a life that is pleasing to God. Their influence will inspire you to walk the same path. Likewise, avoid inner associations with individuals whose primary focus is selfish ambition: acquiring wealth and material gain to enhance personal pleasure. Their persuasion will lead you outside God's will (James 4:3). Remember, "Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble."
Today's Thought: To grow spiritually, build associations with people who are spiritual.
Today's Prayer: "Lord, help me identify companions who will encourage my spiritual growth!"
November 23rd, 2009
11:26 am
@Dan…LOL…shall I add a baked potato and what kind of salad dressing would you like?
@Dream…thanks for the 11:20 I thought I was a prude or something.
@Scool that is nice for you to pay for both tickets…I guess I am stingy…I would go dutch in that situation.
November 23rd, 2009
11:27 am
On the date three/four staying the night and cooking breakfast, I wasn't necessarily grouping those dates together – although I have done it.
You can very easily cook someone a simple meal and send them home without taking them to bed. I have done that too.
However, at the point, that I decide that I like you enough to bump and grind on you, I have no problem cooking you a meal. Hell, I woke up hungry and I'm sure you did too. If I ever slept with a dude and sent him home before the night was over or sent him out the door without at least offering to make breakfast the next morning, he didn't get the job done. (And wasn't invited back – lol)
November 23rd, 2009
11:28 am
Also, whenever out to dinner with a guy and he's paying I always ofer to leave the tip! Only fair!
November 23rd, 2009
11:32 am
Leggs, that's right!
SCool: If I ever slept with a woman and sent her home the next morning without at least offering to make breakfast, she didn't get the job done (this does happen)…
November 23rd, 2009
11:33 am
@SexyCool – Definitely All In
"That being said, I have allowed some of my FZ dudes treat me to the occasional meal and am perfectly fine with it. (They knew what position they played when they called me up and asked me out.)"
Question for you and everyone, isn't this a form of the using also? Do you ever treat some of your FZ guys out? Be honest. It's intriguing because like I said, a woman does not have to like you to let you take her out. And also it is kinda the guy's fault for letting this happen?
I see this alot in Atlanta where women kinda want the benefits of a relationship but since they don't have it all in 1 package yet with the guy they want, they PIECE it together. Jason is her dinner guy. Joe is her concert guy. Bob is her movie guy.
I think if a guy is in the FZ he shouldn't have to treat a woman to anything because you guys are friends. I would aim my energy and resources towards a woman I actually have a chance with. But like I said, if a guy allows this, its his fault.
November 23rd, 2009
11:34 am
As for the paying vs. not paying for a date. My Daddy always told me not to go anywhere depending on anybody. So I always have my money to pay for my dinner when I go out and he told me you always have enough money to get back home. So I cannot see not offering to pay. Also I will say this I think it is childish to keep tabs on who pay and how often. If I invite a guy out I reach for the ticket.
November 23rd, 2009
11:34 am
LOL @ Dan 11:18
All I can say is, 'figuring out' what's up with the other person is so 20 years ago for me at this point. What happened to communication? As Leggs said, the verbal AND the non-verbal. Be honest about what each wants and where you're headed. If what (s)he is saying does not jibe with what they are doing, make a common sense decision and act accordingly.
November 23rd, 2009
11:39 am
M.Dot – Notice I said "occasional." And whereas I may or may not have actually taken them out and paid for a meal, I have had them over for dinner or given them free help on their resumes (something that I do as a business and get paid rather well for) or offered to pass their resumes along if they were looking for employment or sent them referrals for their various business interests, invited them to my house for holiday meals and/or parties and bbq's, bought them a drink if I ran into them out on the town and I could go on.
You know, sht I would do for a friend.
November 23rd, 2009
11:41 am
lol…WD i have female friends that do the same thing in your list…and they have ZERO intrerest in my O face….lol…i really know when a women is interest when i leave the babies across her pearly whites….until then she is a friend..lol
November 23rd, 2009
11:42 am
Professor… While you are cooking for everyone could you find some time and teach dreamn how to cook!
Where is my JAMACO?
Where is RED/AMAZON? How is magnnum treating you? I mean marcuussss!


text:
clopidogrel bisulfate, Plavix (cont.)
Pharmacy Author:
Omudhome Ogbru, PharmD
Omudhome Ogbru, PharmD
Dr. Ogbru received his Doctorate in Pharmacy from the University of the Pacific School of Pharmacy in 1995. He completed a Pharmacy Practice Residency at the University of Arizona/University Medical Center in 1996. He was a Professor of Pharmacy Practice and a Regional Clerkship Coordinator for the University of the Pacific School of Pharmacy from 1996-99.
Medical and Pharmacy Editor:
Jay W. Marks, MD
Jay W. Marks, MD
Jay W. Marks, MD, is a board-certified internist and gastroenterologist. He graduated from Yale University School of Medicine and trained in internal medicine and gastroenterology at UCLA/Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles.
Combining clopidogrel with warfarin (Coumadin) or other drugs that cause bleeding increases the risk of bleeding.
Clopidogrel is converted to its active form by enzymes in the liver. Drugs that reduce the activity of these enzymes, for example, omeprazole (Prilosec, Zegerid) or esomeprazole (Nexium) may reduce the activity of clopidogrel and should not be used with clopidogrel. Other drugs that also may react with clopidogrel in a similar fashion include fluoxetine (Prozac, Sarafem), cimetidine (Tagamet), fluconazole (Diflucan), ketoconazole (Nizoral, Extina, Xolegel, Kuric), voriconazole (Vfend), ethaverine (Ethatab, Ethavex), felbamate (Felbatol), and fluvoxamine (Luvox).
PREGNANCY: There are no adequate studies of clopidogrel in pregnant women.
NURSING MOTHERS: Studies in rats have shown that clopidogrel appears in breast milk; however, it is not known whether it also appears in human breast milk. Because of a potential for side effects in the nursing infant, the physician must weigh the potential benefits and possible risks before prescribing clopidogrel to nursing mothers.
SIDE EFFECTS: The tolerability of clopidogrel is similar to that of aspirin. Diarrhea, rash, or itching occurs in approximately 1 in 20 persons taking clopidogrel. Abdominal pain also occurs in about 1 in 20 persons, but it is less frequent than with aspirin. Headache, chest pain, muscle aches, and dizziness may also occur. Clopidogrel may also cause severe bleeding, allergic reactions, pancreatitis, and liver failure.
Ticlopidine (Ticlid) is an antiplatelet medication quite similar to clopidogrel. It has been associated with a severe reduction in white blood cell count in between 0.8% and 1% of persons. The risk of this dangerous side effect with clopidogrel is about 0.04%, much less than with ticlopidine but twice that of aspirin.
Clopidogrel rarely causes a condition called thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura (TTP) in one out of every 250,000 people. TTP is a serious condition in which blood clots form throughout the body. Blood platelets, which participate in clotting, are consumed, and the result can be bleeding because enough platelets are no longer left to allow blood to clot normally. For comparison, the related drug, ticlodipine (Ticlid), causes TTP 17-50 times more frequently than clopidogrel.
Reference: FDA Prescribing Information
Last Editorial Review: 5/18/2012
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You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.
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