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Things I'm Taking with Me
Eight months ago the church I thought I would pastor for the rest of my life ended.
The reasons it happened are another story. That's not my purpose in writing.
When our church ended I was a long way down a very dark hole. Eight months of pain, counseling, and reflection have shown me I had no idea how deep or dark that hole was. It has only been in the last month that I have truly begun to sense my self resurfacing. That's not quite right. That season of confusion has marked and changed me in profound ways. It has been the most profoundly transformative season of my life.
However, it has been in the last month that I've been able to reflect on the life of our church without a pain that causes me to mentally and emotionally retreat. It's still hard for me to turn my whole self toward the time we had with our church, but for a different reason than before. I miss it. I believe now more than ever that we made the right decision to end. But I look back with increasing fondness and gratefulness for that time–even with all the pain–and I miss it.
This change has allowed me to begin naming some very good things from our time with those people, in that form, for that season, that I don't want to lose. That's what my next handful of blog posts are about. I write it first for myself–to remember, acknowledge, and be grateful to God–but I also believe these reflections could be beneficial to others. That's why I'm sharing them here.
Other Posts in This Series
You really want to "put Christ back in Christmas?"
It's that time of year again–a time when some will try to "put Christ back in Christmas" by pointing out all the violations of Christmas perpetrated by our society. Generic red Starbucks cups, people saying happy holidays, and a noticeable lack of nativity scenes. This isn't a post about that.
Then there's the annual wave of blog posts and articles that try to "put Christ back in Christmas" by pointing out the problem with the approach of the formerly mentioned Christmas police–they want us to focus on fighting consumerism and drop the red cups. Yeah, this isn't a post about that either.
We are so good at dividing our lives up into single issues and areas. We dis-integrate our existence until we can't keep track of all the pieces. We think we are Christians by fighting for nativity scenes or buying less presents or whatever. Regardless of the merits (or lack thereof) of any of those specific activities, there is a problem with the view of life that thinks some single activity is how we "put Christ back in Christmas."
For Christians who would like to live faithfully during the Christmas season (and the rest of the year for that matter), it begins by understanding yourself as a part of the story of God. This is a story that is not primarily about you, it's way better than that. It is the true story of God's intentions for the flourishing of all things, and he invites you to join in it with joy. When we begin here, our questions should change from "how can I put Christ back in Christmas," to "what is God doing in all the spheres of life I touch in this season?"
Christmas is a time when we celebrate the particular part of the story of God when God took the miraculous step of becoming human. This part of the story is filled with humility, sacrifice, hope, celebration, generosity, and presence (a particularly grand form of presence we call incarnation).
If we truly wanted to "put Christ back in Christmas," we would begin by asking ourselves questions inspired by the story.
- How can I live humbly with my family today as a reflection of the humility of Jesus in becoming human?
- How can I be abundantly generous with my coworkers as God has been with us?
- The birth of Jesus was celebrated with singing, joyful proclamation, interruption of routine, gifts, and reflection. How will I (and my family, church, neighborhood) celebrate?
- How would this season be different if I were fully present in each part of it?
Add your questions. There can be hundreds inspired by the story of the birth of Jesus. And the point is certainly not to whittle the grand story back down to a single question, but to let it birth a multitude of questions that will lead us toward living all of life in ways that are fully God-shaped in this season.
Colin Kaepernick's Protest
On Friday, Colin Kaepernick ignited a firestorm by choosing to sit through the playing of the national anthem. Since then the internet has been filled with memes and rants–some supporting him and many blasting him for his actions.
The response to Colin's actions strike me as a perfect example of our struggle to understand each other and make progress in civil dialogue around issues that matter. I may be looking in the wrong places, but I have seen very few responses that seem aimed at actual conversation. People on both sides seem much more interested in puffing their chests and shaming those who disagree with them. Any of us who respond in this way cannot be part of the solution in this case or any other–we will only throw gas on the flames. We need more people who view those with whom they disagree as people and are willing to treat them as such.
So I'm going to share a few thoughts on the situation, and I would truly love any sincere dialogue in response. These are few responses I've seen the last couple days.
He should do something that isn't so disrespectful.
This is one where I'd love to hear from those who do see this as a deeply disrespectful action. It might be. Perhaps he could have chosen something else.
I see his action as obvious and noteworthy, but not disrespectful. He didn't take some vulgar or inappropriate action during the anthem or toward the flag. He just didn't participate. But this is an area where I'd appreciate hearing reasoned thinking from those who would disagree. I know my perspective is different than others on this point and would love to listen if you are one of those people.
I do believe effective protests have to be noticeable. What he did was not violent or vulgar. It was clear and attention-grabbing. I think those are characteristics of an effective protest. But there might have been another way he could have accomplished the same thing.
If he doesn't like it here he can just move.
This is a response often given when criticism of any kind is levied at the United States as a country. And it's true, he and others could move (from the sounds of it a large percentage of the country will be moving to Canada no matter who wins the election in November!). But let's stop and consider what this sentiment is really expressing. It is saying, "you are not allowed to dislike anything about the United States."
I think this same sentiment could be levied at anyone who expresses any kind of frustration with any aspect of life in our country. If you don't like President Obama, if you think the U.S. is too materialistic, if you are frustrated at the response to the global refugee crisis, if…
But this approach has some obvious errors. Number one, there is no perfect place in the world. If we encourage people (including ourselves) to move every time we dislike something, we'll all be nomads. Second, there is a profound difference between disliking (or even hating) aspects of how things are in the United States and hating the United States. You can be profoundly grateful to live here while having a strong desire for aspects of our country to change. Related to this, isn't it better to stay and work for the good of a place than to run away from it? There are times to leave, but in neighborhoods, jobs, schools, and civic organizations we laud the hard work of improving things over running away from difficulty.
I obviously don't know Colin Kaepernick, but perhaps he loves this country so much he wants it to change. I think it would be possible for someone to protest for this reason in this way whether he did or not.
"I wish I was as oppressed as he is."
This is an actual comment I saw on Facebook. The sentiment behind it is that he is too rich and famous to protest anything. This country has been good to him so he has no right to stand against aspects of life in this country.
This country has been good to him. I hope he'd acknowledge that. He is an example of the unbelievable opportunity many people have to flourish and prosper (an extreme example of this, but still…). In some way this lifts up something good about our country.
But why would this remove his ability to protest? In fact, you might argue that he is exactly the kind of person who needs to do it. The rich, famous, and powerful receive a disproportionate amount of influence, for better or worse. If some guy from San Francisco sat through the anthem in the stands it wouldn't be national news. It is exactly the status Kaepernick has that gives his protest power.
Apart from this specific protest, I think those in places of power have a responsibility to steward it for those without a voice. That can happen in government, in the boardroom, or on the field. You may disagree with why he was protesting or how he did it, but people like him are exactly the right ones to be doing it.
One More Thing
There are things going on in our country with race that need our attention. Our country has a deep history of racism and oppression. If you look at history, things like this are generational issues. They don't just go away even as they change. If you're like me you're not sure what your part is in all of it. I think it at least begins with listening–knowing that my experiences are different than others and that the only way I can learn is by listening. We can debate this protest, but I also hope it doesn't keep us from listening to those who are different than we are.
I Apologize
I feel like I need to apologize. I'm a pastor in the suburbs. I live in a place with little obvious material poverty. Multiculturalism is largely nonexistent. My back yard is bigger than my front yard. My community is rife with "first-world problems." And moving to "the city" isn't even on my radar.
Most of the "action" in the church world of our city is happening way closer to downtown. There are so many faithful churches doing powerful and beautiful things there. I love watching my brothers and sisters creatively engage their places with the good news of Jesus. The suburbs, on the other hand, are usually thought of as a wasteland of consumerism, isolation, and antiquated Boomer methods of being the church. That's not all wrong. But if you want to be in on the "movement of God" in our city, the suburbs are not the place to be.
At the beginning I said "I feel like I need to apologize." More accurately, I've felt the need to apologize in the past. When people asked about our church I focused on the work we were doing with a youth center in the inner city. I shared all the reasons our church wasn't a "typical" suburban church. I located us on the closest edge possible to the city, shying away from greeting our actual geography with a willing embrace. And that's something for which I actually need to apologize.
Here's the thing. My wife and I feel called to the place and people we're with–our neighborhood, church, and the south suburbs of Denver in general. We throw that "calling" word around pretty freely to spiritualize our choices, so let me explain what I mean. God has set this part of the city in our hearts as home. We have been drawn to this part of the city since we moved here, despite the fact that we lived elsewhere until three years ago. It's like God placed a magnet in our spirits that drew us to this place. We kept trying to live here even when work took us somewhere else. This place, and these people, are home in a way that goes beyond our choices.
Once I accepted that fact, I started to believe that God wants the suburbs to flourish too, not just downtown or by the university. It's true that the suburbs are profoundly broken–alienation, isolation, addiction, enslavement to things, and a gnawing sense of hopelessness.
"The earth is the Lord's and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it." Psalm 24:1
It's also true that God's good desires for his world are for the whole thing, including the suburbs.
So I'm committed to this place; this people. I'm thankful for the many who God has called to other places too. And I hope we see the peace and reconciliation of his kingdom take root and grow in every part of this city.
An open letter to open letters
Dear Open Letters,
In the past few months I have tried a number of tactics to address what I see as concerning behavior on your part, to no avail. At this point I feel my only recourse is to address these issues publicly, where all those on social media who agree with me will be able to click their approval, which will lead you to understand the corrosive effects of your actions.
Let me be clear, while my use of the personal communication form of a letter in this public space could be construed as a thinly-veiled attempt to defame or disparage you, it is anything but. My hope is that by writing this you will reconsider your actions and finally align yourself with my perspective. I can't imagine a more persuasive approach, and eventually I'm sure you'll thank me.
Before continuing, open letters, I want to affirm that I am sure your intentions are noble. I don't doubt your character or desire to do what is best for society as a whole. In fact, you are one of the most gracious, upstanding, passionate entities I have ever met. It is not your character, but your actions that so deeply concern me. I wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea. Since you're not an idiot I'm sure you will easily see the error of your ways once I point them out.
First, I must call you out for your insatiable desire for attention. Your approach lays your selfishness bare, and it is unbecoming for one of your stature and position. You are supposed to be for the people, but you clearly only care for yourself. I hope people will see you for who you are and discontinue their support for you. Unless of course you are willing to see the light and completely reverse your position so we can agree. The choice on this account is yours–be a narcissist of the highest order or choose what is right.
Second, I cannot agree with the sincerity of your tone when you clearly have a manipulative agenda. Be honest. Don't hide your motives. We can handle the truth. Just be plain and clear about what you're after.
Finally, and most importantly, I beg you to wake up and see that everything you are doing is contributing to the utter disintegration of society as we know it. Our children's future is being rent asunder by your dastardly deeds. If you don't want to be responsible for the end of civilization, you must listen to my plea. Trust me. Once you see things my way and adjust your actions accordingly we will walk together, hand in hand, into our shared utopian future.
Hopefully Yours,
Is the world going to hell?
There is a sentiment that is prevalent among Christians–especially the conservative ones (which many people would call me). I saw it today on Facebook in response to a post about the legality of marijuana.
"The world is changing, and most of it is for the worst."
In some Christian circles it is a pastime to look at the world through "the-world-is-going-to-hell" glasses. There is a longing for the "good-'ol-days" when everyone was Christian and we weren't so morally corrupt–when the United States was a Christian nation and we respected God the way we should. Is it true?
This perspective is most often expressed in the direction of traditional moral issues–sexuality, substance use/abuse, church attendance, abortion, and the themes of movies and television. I don't deny that our current cultural location leaves some things to be desired in the realm of traditional morality.
The other place this perspective pops up is in relation to the perceived "liberalization" of America. It's when prayer is removed from schools, universities dogmatize naturalism (not the good of science, but the assumption that God MUST not exist), and people try to take guns away (yes, that's cheeky).
This perceived jettisoning of morality and slide into liberalism is cited as sure evidence that the world is sliding down the greasy slope to oblivion. Is it?
I don't know, here's some of the things I see when I look around. There is an uprising pushing us to take racism seriously (and we certainly already see improvement in the effects of racism since the first half of this century). Women are more respected and have greater opportunity than they have in the past. Extreme poverty is decreasing dramatically around the globe. Bullying and discrimination are increasingly stigmatized and not tolerated. Churches are looking outside themselves at how they can work for the good of their neighborhoods and the world. Efforts to care for the physical aspects of our planet continue to be explored and acted upon. There is movement to pursue business in ways that include profit but do not see profit as the only end. Is there more work to be done? Of course! But we can point to places of improvement.
In short, there are many things that look more and more like the kingdom of God. There are also things that look less and less like it. It looks to me like we live in a time where good and evil grow up together. The world isn't going to hell. It also isn't on the verge of utopia. It is growing and groaning in anticipation of it's renewal.
I hope for those who claim to follow Jesus, we will live in hope–working faithfully for the good and flourishing of the world–working against darkness and pursuing light. There is so much good to be done, and believing the world is going to hell will keep us from it. Let's live joyfully and hopefully for the life of the world God loves and in which he's at work.
The most painful letter I've ever written
Last week I sat down to write three letters I'd considered writing for years. They were letters to each of my family members–my wife, son, and daughter–that they would only receive in the event of my death. It was something I'd wanted to write but just hadn't–I don't know why. I was going on a trip and felt a compulsion to make it happen. It kind of made me wonder if I was having some kind of premonition, but thankfully that wasn't the case.
Writing these letters was incredibly clarifying for me. What would you say to the people you loved most if you knew it was your last time to tell them anything? That was the question writing these letters answered for me. As I typed through tears, here are the things I learned.
My words won't matter without my actions.
The first and last things I wrote to each of them were words attempting to sum up the depth of my love for them with only moderate success. While these words were important, I felt the truth that they would only matter to my family to the extent they were supported by my actions over the course our years together. I am far from perfect, but I do believe each of my family members has experienced the truth of my love for them, and that was the thing that gave me confidence in the words I wrote. I also reminded me that this joyful work of love is an ongoing one. I want to live with my family in a way that those words would always ring true.
I believe the gospel of Jesus and its implications with every fiber of my being.
I devoted time in each of my letters to trying to engage the pain of loss and how that might impact the way each one viewed God. I don't worry much about my wife's faith. I know it would be devastating, but I believe she'd lean on God in a time like that. My daughter on the other hand, she feels so deeply, I'm not sure what outlet she'd find for the pain. I was a little surprised at how necessary it felt to me to communicate that my own death wouldn't shake my belief in the goodness of God at all. It's actually the death and resurrection of Jesus that gives me an unwavering hope.
I know we're all at different places in our journey with God, faith, and what truly gives life. Writing these letters just confirmed to me how deeply I have planted myself with Jesus. His work in the world to bring healing to every aspect of the brokenness of the world and each one of us is unspeakably beautiful. Every day I see this in ways I haven't before. He really wants what is best for all creation and every person, no matter how hard we run from it. His victory over death and the description of what will be one day at the end of the Bible give me so much hope for a wholeness beyond what I can currently imagine. There's just nothing more life-giving or beautiful than this and I want my family to live in that, regardless of the hardships that might come in this life.
My fear is that they wouldn't continue living fully.
Look, when I think about losing one of them, I struggle to think how I would continue to live fully. There would be a long period of grief. That loss would never leave me. Both of those things are okay, even good. At the same time, my love for them compels me to long for their good. I spent some time specifically encouraging them to seek healing with God through grief so they could pursue a full, happy, purposeful life. I understand I don't have control over that, but I didn't want them to have any sense that they would fail to love me by living the life they've been given fully.
I certainly hope those letters are never opened. I'm also thankful I wrote them. I'd want my family to have those words. I am also thankful for the things writing them taught me. It revealed the depths of my feelings and convictions. After all, there was nothing to hide there, no pretense. I'm thankful for the clarity it gave me. What would you say?
Instant Replay and Reality
There is no black and white, only gray. There is no truth, only what is true for each person. Persuasion is a violation of the other.
These sentiments and the perspective the represent have become deeply embedded in the collective consciousness of our society. They are nearly assumed by all who are tolerant and loving. They are becoming the proverbial water in which we swim.
This perspective has certainly been doing its work on my own framework for engaging the world. I have dramatically shifted not only my perspective, but also my approach to issues and people, in the last ten years. I do believe that listening is a far better first step than talking (even if this doesn't always work itself out in my practices!). I do believe that there is great nuance in our world–pure black and white is naive. People truly do have different perspectives that dramatically color perception. Yet there is in all of this a path that leads to oblivion. Football reminded me of this.
Yesterday I was watching one of the first football games of the year, and after a play was ruled to be a fumble, the team that had lost the ball challenged the call. The referee went to watch the review and the commentators walked all the viewers through slow-motion replays. As this was happening a thought struck me. We are all looking at this replay assuming there is objective truth to be found. It either was or was not a fumble and we will have a better chance of determining the truth through slow motion replays.
Now there is still plenty to soften the edges of this assertion. Fans of each team will find ways to see the replay as favoring their team. They may see the truth if they are willing to work hard at laying aside their affinities, but it will be difficult. Sometimes there is not a clear angle and the best the referee can do is make an educated guess about what happened. The play may even be so close that there is no way to tell for sure what happened. Yet none of these things negates the underlying assumption of all the people watching the game that there is a true event that actually happened. And if there is a true event it is something everyone should try to see as it really is.
I recently had the joy of speaking with an international student from Iran. He was so honest, personable, and engaging. In the course of the conversation he shared his belief that all religions necessarily divide people because they create "in and out," "us and them." After more conversation and reflection on this, I think he was on to something, but not just about religion. In his expression of agnosticism he was also creating a division of belief. I was either with him in that belief or not. There isn't a position to be taken that doesn't create "us and them" on some level. This doesn't mean people can't deeply love and befriend each other across these beliefs. We absolutely can. I'd even say "us and them" is too strong–perhaps better to say there is no way to erase significant differences without all believing exactly the same things. And we will wrestle with this because there is a reality to be sought out and discovered.
Like the football play, there is a reality. Either God exists or he doesn't. Either Jesus died and rose from the dead or he didn't. Either he will return as King or he won't. These are not matters of opinion, they are aspects of reality with which we must wrestle. (It would be nice to have an instant replay!) Even those who say there is no truth are trying to get at the truth. That the world is random and devoid of meaning is still a claim to know the nature of reality. We're all pursuing that. I hope we pursue it with love, grace, and peace toward each other and a willingness to listen before talking. I hope we recognize the difficulties of the pursuit based on our own ingrained perspectives and biases. I hope we remain humble in our beliefs and interactions. And I hope we understand the gravity of the pursuit. It is not unimportant. It is not something to be cast aside as antiquated. It is something to be pursued with the best of ourselves, in community, with humility and intention.
So that we may know the truth and be set free.
Are judgment and love enemies?
As I was writing this post, I came across this quote.
"What is love? Love is the absence of judgment." The Dalai Lama
Maybe it depends on what you mean by judgment, or maybe the Dalai Lama and I just disagree.
Judgment is a dirty word in our society. It is one of the most carnal and insensitive acts a human being could perpetrate on another–to judge them. It is one of the two deadly sins Christians most frequently accused of perpetrating–judgment and hypocrisy. It is regularly berated by Christians as they remind us that we are called to love, not judge. It is the trump card tossed at people with whom we'd rather not have a dialogue–"Stop judging me (or them or whatever)!" Accepting the narrative that judgment is antithetical to love and in itself is a vice is deeply problematic.
Our legal system is based on judgment. When a murderer is judged to be guilty and subsequently sentenced we don't object that the judges are just being judgmental. Parenting is an ongoing exercise in judgement. When my son threw away our trash at the frozen yogurt shop without being asked today, I judged that he was performing a kind act of service and affirmed him for it. When he yells at his sister I judge that he is being unkind and instruct him to adjust his actions, and hopefully his posture toward her. Hiring and firing are direct outcomes of judgment. We inspect a resume and judge a candidate's personality and fit before deciding to hire. We judge that an employee's performance is not good enough and we fire them. Is the act of making these judgments wrong (and if it is, isn't that a judgment?)?
Judgment divorced from love is harmful–at times even abusive. But I don't know that it is best to call judgment divorced from love judgment. I think it is something else. It's something Jesus gets at.
Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
There is a type of judgment that is "unChristian," but there is also a type of judgment that is essential to following Jesus. What Jesus is denouncing here is twofold. First, it is judgment without self-reflection. It is not that there is no speck in the eye of the other, but that one cannot remove that speck without dealing with the blurred vision being caused by the plank in his own eye. The passage does end with the plank and the speck being removed. The other sense in which judgement is denounced is when judgment is condemning. We should not stand in condemnation over another. When judgment is divorced from love it quickly becomes condemnation. There is no room for us to condemn others.
So judgment of condemnation or without self-reflection is wrong and deeply harmful. Period. Moving on from this point, there is a proper judgment that is wed to love. We can describe this judgment as discernment leading to action. There is no way to read the rest of the Bible and come away thinking what Jesus was getting at in the passage above was that we should not discern the difference between right or wrong and take action based on that judgment. The good of each person and the whole world requires an ability to judge the difference between light and dark, good and evil, right and wrong.
It is fashionable to say that right and wrong are matters of personal fancy, but when the truly reprehensible happens we cannot toe that line. A teacher in our city was just arrested for sexual assault of a student. No one is advocating that the morality of this act is in the eye of the beholder. Right and wrong are only matters of preference until it makes us uncomfortable. No doubt the lines between good and evil are not always clear. Gray areas are real things. But the complexity of virtue and vice does not negate their existence, it only increases the need for wise and loving judgment.
The sacrificial death of Jesus is the pattern of the deepest love–a love that is wed to judgment. It was the judgment that sin and death were destructive and needed to be broken that led Jesus to give his life. In that act of sacrifice he levied judgment against sin (something present in all people and enacted by all people) and loved the world in the deepest way possible. Without judgment this love would not have been necessary. In our culture it may be wise to use the word discernment rather than judgment. However, talking about this issue is important because when people are accused of judgment in our society it is often a discernment that is unfavorable to the sensibilities of another, not a condemnation. And we cannot lose wise discernment (judgment) that leads to action. For the sake of our selves, families, friends, neighborhoods, cities, and the good of the world we must allow judgment and love to remain deeply wedded.
Dear Christians,
I am hesitant to write about things like what is happening in Baltimore because I know I am culturally. socio-economically, and geographically distant from what is happening. I'm writing today because I feel compelled to as a pastor. I see so much coming from people like me that looks and sounds nothing like Jesus. For those of us who claim the name of Jesus, he is our King and example. Our common call is to be conformed to him and his ways–not to bow to any particular cultural ideology. We're not doing that.
The idolatry of order.
Destruction of property is wrong. Violence is wrong. But what about systemic injustice? What about huge numbers of people peacefully protesting out of their anguish and frustration? Is violence only wrong when it is directed at those in power? Listening to the reaction of many who claim to follow Jesus generates the feeling that some feel relieved by the pockets of violence that arose among the protests. It serves as an opportunity to decry everything that's happening and move 100% of the focus off of the misuse of power and seemingly rampant injustice. Order has been removed! How could you ever support people who mess with order!? Civility and order are good. Violence is not. But for the love of God (and yes, I mean love of God), can we please stop acting like order is the only virtue that matters to God? Let's look to the Bible we claim has authority and see the beautiful picture of God's intentions for the world. Does it include violence and chaos? No. (Except when God's Spirit shakes things up!) Does it include systemic injustice, lack of compassion, hatred, and racism? No! We are making one virtue an idol and bowing before it.
Engaged concern for the poor and oppressed.
Jesus said he came to proclaim good news to the poor and to set the oppressed free. We are proclaiming bad news to the poor and telling the oppressed to deal with it. There are Christians I have seen say that people don't deserve to be heard because some have perpetrated disorder and violence. What?! We ignore the plight of the poor and oppressed because some people acted wrongly? It just doesn't make any sense from a Christian perspective. We are the people called to see the image of God in all people. We have the strongest reason of all people to pursue true equality and dignity for everyone. Why are some of us its greatest opponents? We are the ones who should be praying for and pursuing, "your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven." The kingdom of heaven is one of holistic peace–not just peace for a few people who are like me. Can we PLEASE listen to Jesus instead of FoxNews or MSNBC?
Love. Love.
Jesus said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
Love should drive us. I would just ask each of us to take a few quiet moments and ask ourselves, "Am I honestly being motivated by love in my current approach?" Not by a shallow love that has no tolerance for pain, but by the sacrificial and enduring love most starkly displayed in God on a cross?
Let's take these words about love and let them form our responses and thoughts…
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.


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You might not realise it, but your favourite fry up or bowl of porridge and honey has an impact on the environment, as well as your health.
Greenhouse gases are produced at every step of food production – from methane belched out by cows to the exhaust fumes from lorries and planes that ship your food from fields to factories, from factories to supermarket shelves, and from the shops to your kitchen table. Huge amounts of water are also used to grow food for livestock.
We've been working with The Carbon Trust, looking at the UK's favourite breakfasts, to see what their true cost is. We'd love to know what you think - tell us about your breakfast choices on social media #thecrunch2016
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Street Talk: Have you hugged your banker today?
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The American Bankers Association says that many small business owners have been wondering what it takes these days to get a bank loan. Read More


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I have a hard starting '96 Toyota T100 2.7 L 250,000 miles. Happens when I am driving on warmer weather, parking car takes a few tries. Changed the injectors, coolant sensors, plug and other parts.
First thing you'd want to do is see if it's flooding out. When it doesn't start, pull a few spark plugs off. If they are covered with gasoline, that means that for some reason it is flooding out. If you checked the injectors, it can't be them. It could be that the computer's pumping too much, the head gasket is getting a little bit weak, or the fuel pressure regulator is leaking. Now, if you have no fuel, that could be that the fuel pump has no power, or that something is going on in that system and it's not pumping any fuel to the injectors, and after a while it starts cranking again. Fuel pumps can overheat when they get hot. If this condition becomes persistent, I recommend having a technician from YourMechanic come to your car's location to diagnose your car's hard starting issue and determine what needs repair.
Our certified mechanics come to you ・Backed by 12-month, 12,000-mile guarantee・Fair and transparent pricing


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Last week, Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) said on Neil Cavuto's show that he was co-sponsoring the Military Safe Bases Act, which would allow members of the military to carry their firearms onto military installations.
"Neil, it would just allow soldiers to do, like at Fort Hood, what they could do if they stepped one inch outside of Fort Hood into civilian territory. Because there was a mass shooting in Killeen at a cafeteria years ago; Texas allowed a concealed carry permit.
"And, you know, we've talked about it with different people – military, non-military – and I like to -- we want the bill to leave it to the military's discretion whether they allow concealed carry or open carry, but let the military – or force the military – to allow permits because you mentioned military police, more military police with my dear friend Allen West that I voted for House Speaker. And, the thing is you can't hire enough military police to do the good that our military – qualified with weapons every year – could do if they just had the right to have a weapon."
The mass shooting Rep. Gohmert referenced to occurred at Luby's in 1991 when George Hennard crashed through the front window and proceeded to open fire. In fifteen minutes, he killed 23 people before committing suicide after being wounded by a police officer.
In the aftermath, Texas Democratic Governor Ann Richards vetoed a concealed carry law, which contributed to her re-election defeat to George W. Bush in 1994. Then-Gov. Bush promptly signed it into law in 1995, making Texas a shall-issue state concerning issuing concealed handgun permits.


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Weekend Drivel
Well, I had a relatively decent weekend.
Friday Night, I dropped Jacob off with his dad (NOT a normal "daddy weekend" but he has a TKD tournament this weekend and asked to switch). After dropping Jake off, I went and hung out with my Scrapping Ladies. We had a great time crafting and giggling (I was cross stitching). Stayed out a bit too late, but I guess I needed it.
Saturday, I went to breakfast with my friend, Susan. Susan and I were BEST friends in 3rd grade. Then, for some reason, we just grew apart. And I don't remember ever seeing her again. That is, until we ran into each other at IKEA a few weeks ago. It was nice to reconnect. We had a lovely pancake breakfast at the Tyler Aboretum and a nice walk around the place. We even got a tour on how maple syrup was made!
Afterward, ran home for some personal time. During the drive home, I noticed my brakes making some SERIOUS noise, so I took my car to Pep Boys. I dropped my car off at 2 p.m. I got my car back at 10 a.m. Sunday. $317 for brakes, rotors and oil change. GREAT price, I know, but still a punch in the wallet.
Since I was stuck at home, I spent the rest of Saturday cross stitching and watching movies. Somehow knocked my hip out of joint (it goes in and out quite regularly, especially if I sit cross-legged on the couch or a bed). Went to bed about midnight.
Sunday I woke up early (9 or so) and walked up to get my car. I threw in a load of laundry, folded another load and putzed a bit before I left and was STILL at Pep Boys by 10 (I really don't think it was a long walk).
My legs/hip were quite sore all day. I KNOW the walk was a good thing, but the soreness sucks.
After getting my car, I attacked my craft room. I've pretty much got the furniture where I want it, it's organizing and decluttering that drive me nuts. Trying to determine the best, most logical (Six Sigma?) way to set everything up. I think I've got an idea that works, so we'll see how it goes. Spent part of the time organizing magazines to either be sold on eBay, given away or recycled. I don't need to hang on to things that rarely get a re-read.
Got my peanut about 5. He was VERY upset to be leaving daddy. 😦 He had a great weekend with him. It's times like this that I wish he lived closer so he and Jacob could spend more time together. He's a boy. He needs time with his daddy.
Poor peanut 😦
But, Jacob and I had a good evening watching Little Monsters and cuddling on the couch. 🙂


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Jade: "I don't like that smell."
Me: "Okay, well, I'm pretty sure that came from Nanuq. We can put him outside."
Jade: "I think you should put him outside."
Me (opening door): "Come on, Nanuq. Out you go…. Hurry up, before we all die from the draft!"
Jade: "Why did you say that?"
Me: "Say what?"
Jade: "Why did you say we would die from the giraffe?"


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The one stop photography solution
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A good photographer should not just have the ability to shoot breathtaking images, but also have an excellent idea of how to process them. This is where photo editing applications such as photoshop come into play. It is a proven fact that the very best photos out there are those that have been masterfully retouched. www.milesholden.com is an expert in this field, and his work just speaks for itself. With a long track record off delivering quality images for virtually any type of photography, you can never go wrong with opting for the services of this seasoned photographer.
By simply taking time to visit this website, you will be able to view plenty of galleries from all the above mentioned niches. Whether it is for some summer or winter action, aerial shots or any other kind of photography you may be interested in. Miles Holden is a professional Photographer based in Queenstown New Zealand and is a one-stop shop to access all the images you want, be they be for personal or commercial utilization.
Photo by Miles Holden


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At 74, Marie Maes is scrambling to find work.
Even though she spent four decades working in Colorado hospitals and Seattle nursing homes, the veteran licensed practical nurse lives just above the poverty line on little more than $12 a day after she pays her rent.
She is among a near-record and growing number of women working well into their 70s, thanks to smaller Social Security checks, shorter careers, smaller pensions, longer life spans than men and bad financial planning….
Technorati Tags: poverty, elders, retirement, employment


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'The OpEd Project' Tells Women To Pen Their Views
'The OpEd Project' Tells Women To Pen Their Views
Catherine Orenstein is the creator of the initiative called The Op-Ed Project. It is designed to empower more women — from stay-at-home-moms to women who are incarcerated — to submit opinion pieces to the nation's newspapers and influence policy and public discussion.
MICHEL MARTIN, host:
Now we have another perspective on what's missing from the news, specifically the opinion pages. If you turn to the editorial pages of most major newspapers, the vast majority of the opinion articles are written by men, surveys show. Barbara Ehrenreich, who we just heard from, is actually one of the few women commentators whose articles regularly appear in major newspapers. And Catherine Orenstein is working to change that. She travels across the country finding women who are experts in their own right and teaches them how to submit op-eds for publication. Her initiative is called the Op-Ed Project. And Catherine Orenstein joins us now from our New York bureau. Welcome, thank you for joining us.
Ms. CATHERINE ORENSTEIN (Director, Op-Ed Project): It's a pleasure to be here.
MARTIN: Can we just start with the basics because I'm not sure everybody knows this. What is an op-ed and why do they matter?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: An op-ed is an opinion essay, but we actually treat op-ed as a concept, a short-form evidence-based argument of public value, public interest, regardless of whether it appears in the newspaper, online, in broadcast media, wherever.
MARTIN: And why do they matter?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: They matter for a lot of reasons. For one, they heed all other media. They drive thought leadership in America. It's where ideas become policies and where people get tapped to be leaders. Deans of universities run for Congress.
If you look at the statistics, in fact, they are remarkably the same across all platforms. So if you look at op-ed pages, which run about 85 percent male, and then you took at television, political talk shows on Sunday morning, about 84 percent of the pundits are male, and then you look at Congress, that's 83 percent male, and that's not a coincidence. That's a spectrum of thought leadership. And opinion forums, whether they're online or in paper or whatever they are, are a gateway. You know how people say marijuana is a gateway drug? Well, you could say that key opinion forums - op-ed pages, online forums - are a gateway into public debate.
MARTIN: And why do you think it's so overwhelmingly male? And I do believe that - I think it's important that you cited the statistics, and I think a lot of people would be surprised by that and still wouldn't necessarily believe it, in part because they see the number of women presenters in the news - for example, women television anchors, local anchors, and they say well how can that be? But you're saying the numbers bear up over time very consistently, that it's not just sort of a minor difference. It's a huge difference. Why do you think that is?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: You know, it's a really good question, and the debate has been fierce, and usually it runs somewhere between is it sexism or is it biology, or are women socialized differently?
We look at it, and we look at a much more obvious, much more solvable and much more measurable part of the problem, which is that women don't submit op-eds with anywhere near the frequency that man do. They actually - in lots of fields.
So we're not - again, I want to say we're not just talking about paper or even online, but in lots of ways women don't submit. It's about 85 percent of submissions. Actually, 90 percent of submissions at the Washington Post by their own internal accounting last year came from men, and 88 percent of their bylines last year - again, by their own internal account - were men.
So we're actually fairly represented, women are, in relationship to our submission ratio, if you think of it that way. So what we do at The Op-Ed Project is we say, you know, it could be sexism, it could be biology. How would we know if we're not submitting? Isn't the obvious solution to get more smart women submitting? And furthermore, what if it's just a pattern?
What if the reason that it's like this is a numbers game, a pattern that keeps replicating itself? And patterns can change, and actually we are seeing them change even through our own project in a relatively short of amount of time, but they change in lots of ways, and we happen to have a black president now, something that people didn't think possible for a long time, and that's a result of not just a single person but a lot of change and participation, a pattern that has changed significantly. So it's important to remember that these things are not sort of universal, archetypal, unchangeable, set-in-stone dynamics.
MARTIN: And you mentioned that you want smart women to step up and get to that keyboard and start writing, but what kind of smart women are you looking for? I mean, the only other reason I would mention that is that I would bet you that a number of conservatives, you know, people from the right to the center-right would argue that it's really, it's conservatives who are missing from the opinion page, and I know that's something that people could argue about. So I want to ask you, what kinds of voices are you looking for?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: We look across the political and in all fields. We define expert, quote-unquote expert, as a woman who has knowledge that would be valuable in the public sphere - expertise, information, something to contribute. So we work with top universities. You know, we work with Yale, Stanford, Princeton, but we also work with a homeless shelter and a women's prison re-entry program because who better to talk about prison reform than women who have been through it or in the system?
We work with a number of non-profits. We have sessions that are open to the public in six cities now: Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York, D.C., Chicago coming up. In fact, anyone who - you know, we encourage women who would like to participate in this program to join us. If we can be of assistance, we would love that, and you can find that information on our Web site, theopedproject.org.
MARTIN: So politics no barrier to entry. All points of view welcome.
Ms. ORENSTEIN: Absolutely not. In fact, the premise of our project is that a diversity of ideas will create a stronger result always.
MARTIN: So what's the trick to writing a successful op-ed? And I do take your point that you're talking about all platforms, not just the written but also programs, political programs, Sunday morning talk shows, which I do have some experience with myself. What's the trick of it?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: I think there are some basic concepts. What we do in our program, initially this project was so pragmatic. We shared really basic information, what I call pass-code information that gets shared among people who - you know, like you, for example, people who know how to participate in public debate already, but if you're not in that pool of people, you might not have that very basic information, and as you know, the pool is overwhelmingly white, overwhelmingly privileged and overwhelmingly male, and so it tends to get shared among that tiny group of people.
So a lot of the information we share is very basic. We don't have any monopoly on that information. It's: What's a lead? What's a news hook? How do you - what questions do you need to answer for an editor to take you seriously?
But over time, because we've done hundreds and hundreds of these sessions, and they're essentially like very powerful focus groups with intense, highly intelligent, super-experienced women, over time we've come to address the questions that women repeatedly bring up, and I don't think this is unique to women.
I think this is probably something that you would find in any marginalized group, any group that's marginalized from public debate, and I call it the culture of self-abnegation, and it is all of the things that people say, all of the ways in which marginalized groups buy into or begin to actually rationalize and thereby collude in their own marginalization.
I'm not saying that in any way to suggest blame, but rather what we see over and over again, when we bring together a group, is people telling us within the first hour, people with burning issues to talk about, telling us why we shouldn't listen to them.
You know, I don't want to self-promote. I don't know if I have enough information. Probably somebody else knows more. And essentially what we deal with, we've created a context and exercises to get people to think about the logical implications of that kind of thinking…
MARTIN: And - I'm sorry…
Ms. ORENSTEIN: ..exclusion.
MARTIN: I'm sorry, we're almost out of time. Have you moved the dial at all?
Ms. ORENSTEIN: Yes, absolutely. One of the reasons that this project exists -you know, I'm a writer and a journalist, and I wouldn't be doing this if we didn't see a tremendous impact. We had really phenomenal results. We see every single day new women publishing. You can see them. We publish highlights on our Web site almost every day.
And you asked Tina Tchen how would she know, you know, when she succeeds, when she sees success. We see success not only by the concrete results we see every day, but also we'll know we've succeeded when we've reached a tipping point where we can see that the pattern has changed.
MARTIN: And you might be able to go out of business.
Ms. ORENSTEIN: That's our plan, in fact.
MARTIN: Catherine Orenstein is the founder of The Op-Ed Project, where she teaches and encourages women of all political persuasions and backgrounds to write op-eds for publication. She joined us from our bureau in New York. Thank you so much.
Ms. ORENSTEIN: Pleasure to be here.
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May is almost over. Annnnnd its been so packed with events, activities, running, cooking, eep! So many good things, and I am so grateful for them all.
I wanted to link up with Amanda for today, and share some of my "newly-favorited" Pinterest quotes, random recipes, and other happenings in this life. Mwah ❤
1. I really love The Coconut Mama's blog, and this recent post totally caught my eye! This summer will smell a lot like Coconut Lime ❤
2. A mantra all women need to live by. NO LESS, ladies!
3. Every single aspect of this site, this lifestyle, and this woman is so incredibly inspiring. I look at Rachel's Instagram and blog daily, and she never ceases to spark new thoughts of living in my life. She's beautiful and is an awe-inspiring yogi as well.
Incredibly grounded, beautifully well-spoken, and just all around a blog you NEED to follow. ❤
4. Last night my family and I hosted a 5K Fun Run with the Badgerland Strider Running Group out by our home, and over FIFTY runners attended! What a spectacular night for a run, and the course, the food, and the company were perfect. Couldn't ask for a better fun run!
5. This has been particularly true the last few weeks. My schedule for work, events, and training for running has kept me on my toes for this entire summer season already, and I revel in the night I get a good solid sleep 🙂 Then again, I wouldn't trade these memories for the world.
6. This recipe caught my eye immediately. And I officially need to purchase a spiralizer. Its going to rock my world, I know it.
7. Ummm, amazing. Annnd teach me?
8. I'm officially purchasing this.
9. Rice Krispie treats are prooobably one of my favorite desserts of all-time. When Amanda posted this the other day, I died. Healthy treats? Sign me up! Making tonight. Decided. Happening. All of the above.
10. I am so genuinely happy lately. Life is just… set. Good. Making sense. And I'm surrounded by so much love from friends and family, I could not ask for anything more. I'm truly blessed.
Peace and Love everyone ❤
Let's connect!
Twitter: @skdunne444


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As we are rapidly approaching the big event, I've been giving you sneak peeks at the artists' work who will be at our market. So far we've focused on individual artists, but today (and next week) I want to do something a little different. I've put together a gift guide for you. It's not too early to be thinking of Christmas gifts, and if you don't find the perfect something for everyone on your list at Indie Craft Parade, good luck finding it elsewhere. Indie Craft Parade truly has something for everyone--even the men in your life. People often mistakenly think of art markets and festivals as being for women. And while, yes, many of our vendors and shoppers are women, that doesn't mean for a second that we don't have some really great things for guys.
Check out these awesome items below. The dapper gents in your life will certainly be happy to receive them.
1. The Maker Tee from Parachute Clothing
2. Gentle Giant Tee from Fuzzy Ink
3. Etched Pint Glass from Phoenix Fire Studios
4. Handmade Bow Ties from The Cordial Churchman
5. Block Printed Toms Shoes from Matt Butler
6. Travel Journal from Useful Books
7. Screenprinted Poster from Shed Labs
8. The Skinny Jean from Billiam Jeans


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How To Cancel A Vivint Contract, File A Criticism, And Switch Your Monitoring
Britian's Prince William and Kate Middleton chose Canada for their first official go to as newly weds and as the new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.
Wow – I like the twenties and Burnaby Village has objects that look as though they might be similar to what my grandparents experienced within the rural mountains of Pennsylvania. Thanks for a terrific article! We chose and enjoyed the old-world fashion of the property and the peaceable atmosphere. The employees were extraordinarily friendly and also you had been inspired to treat the lodge as 'dwelling'. But for hundreds of Canadians visiting London, although, the most placing feature is the presence as soon as again of their home away from residence on Trafalgar Sq., an emotional mecca for guests for so much of this century.
Wow, this was really interesting. I've never learn an article fairly like this. I do not assume I might ever make it in a van. I give you main props for pulling it off. Congrats on your grandbaby and I hope that being a reside-in grandma is going well! Be a part of and search by way of the wealth of listings calling for a home sitter to offer property care in exchange free of charge lodging in Canada.
Very interesting reading. Well written and informative hub. My husband and I constructed our house ourselves and I enjoy reading about unusual homes as effectively. So sorry this didn't change into the home you dreamed about. Thanks for sharing. If you want to participate in E book Sharing Monday, please go away the link to your e book sharing post under. Pleased studying!
Additionally, I have absolutely no manner of understanding whether Hong Kong would impose any tax on property leaving the country to a beneficiary. I assume there is a probate fee to be paid in Hong Kong as well. I'm a eager backyard fanatic and there is nothing more annoying than slugs. Additionally, do not leave buckets outside and brush underneath your bins about once a week. It's important to be sure that they don't have the surroundings they like should you really need rid of the quick and for good.


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Under the Dome
Scott Walker to speak at June's NC GOP convention in Raleigh
Wisconsin Gov. and expected presidential candidate Scott Walker will be a featured speaker at the state Republican Party's convention in June. The convention will take place June 5 to June 7 at the Raleigh Convention Center.
Walker will be the keynote speaker at dinner on June 5.
North Carolina Republican Party Chairman Claude E. Pope, Jr. said in a statemennt "there are few examples of a leader who has taken on liberal special interest groups in his state such as Governor Walker."
The announcement comes amid news that an influential Republican, David Koch, is favoring Walker in the 2016 race. Koch is one of the world's richest men and is one of the party's major fundraisers.
At a fundraiser, Koch reportedly said he would support any number of Republicans but "it should be Scott Walker."


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Letters to the Editor
Stingy with the troops
My dad always said to put your money where your mouth is. This Congress spoke. They told the soldiers and families of our reservists and Marines, some on two and three combat tours, life and death kinds of tours with many taking pay cuts from their jobs risking their lives, and as a token of gratitude on behalf of the nation for their good fight and to ease their financial burden here is a 2.2% raise.
That is the lowest a Congress voted for in 10 years for our soldiers. All talk, no walk. To those in uniform, I say this Congress does not speak for family nor for the people of this nation. God bless you and happy Veterans Day. We will be with you at the Veterans Day parade this Saturday from sea to shining sea.
John Durnya


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Preview of coming attractions (maybe)
watch if you wanna
Formats available: Quicktime (.mov)
At the end of the road...
It's a long way from my mountain to the bodegas and roadside seafood stands of my youth. And it used to be rural, dirt roads, farms and not another house in sight. Now, the old homeplace is surrounded by McMansions on 5 acre lots.
You can go home again, but it's never the same...
(I built that barn with my dad in 1970 from lumber scavenged from an old house we torn down in another county. All the pine trees were dug up in the woods and planted in the yard that same year...)
The Road
watch if you wanna
Formats available: Quicktime (.mov)
I saw about 14 hours of this last weekend...
In response to Anonymous
The little jewel in Analog 2 is a sweet mint condition Argus 8mm movie projector that runs as if new! Circa 1958 or '59. All cast metal. The bulb is good and everything nearly perfect. I hope to use it in an installation soon.
Analog Gold 2!
Analog Gold 2!
Originally uploaded by justmakingstuff
Analog Gold!
Analog Gold!
Originally uploaded by justmakingstuff
Feeling a bit analog today...
Today I made a list...
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