"Mom…ok…so, Sunday was SO bad! Daddy had to do girl hair and he is just SOOOOO bad at it! Ugh! But don't tell him, ok?"
Sophi: "Mom, I want to play with Claire. Cuz it's been FOR.EV.ER since I've played with her. Like more than a year."
Me: "Sophi, you just played with Claire on Friday."
Sophi: (thoughtful pause) "Oh… yeah!"
Me: "So was it fun to have Dad be your babysitter?"
Sophi: "Yes! Funner than when it's you. (realizes what she just said and looks up in desperation) "I mean, not funner. The same fun. Cuz you're so fun too, so don't be sad about what I said."
Sophi: "Soooo…. tell me about the trip. How was the beach?"
Me: "It was so much fun! Except I put my sunglasses on my head and forgot about them and a big wave came and crashed on me and knocked my sunglasses off just like it happened to Jessica."
Sophi: "Mom! Don't worry! Cuz when it's your birthday I will say to Dad (insert very demanding, harsh voice) 'Dad! Take me to the store RIGHT NOW so I can buy sunglasses for Mom with my own money!!!"
Me: "Jer, are we out of pull ups for Elli?"
Jer: "Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. I'm so sorry."
Sophi: "Ugh. Dad, you are FIRED!"
I think my favorite is her realizing she said Jer is "funner" than you and her trying to make you feel better. What a kick that kid is!