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Is the English language missing a word, or one that is more alliterative? That seems to be more of what you’re reaching for with self-ful. You’re right of course. I want my kids to have a healthy sense of self. The words I’ll associate with that are ones like: self-worth, self-realization, and self-awareness. Self-care, a newer term, is simpler and along the same lines. Self-ful for me, is too close to being full of self, which is typically rendered as a person being “full of him/herself.” And much of what we mean when we describe someone as selfish, is that they’re being self-centered at a given point in time.
Now that’s all a parsing, which is just like a boy to do.
I like Buddy-roo’s question. Is mama being selfish? Yes, it stings in the way that it pulls at universal parental fears that the work we’re doing as not good enough. More importantly though, it’s the leading edge–perhaps–of her willingness to critique the behavior of her mom. That’s a brave new world parenting-wise, even if you know she’s saying it because you’re not letting her do what she wants.