I heard the hubbub over this WSJ article, Why Chines Mothers Are Superior several weeks ago but it was just this morning that I had finally read it. I loved it. I may not agree with the entire thing but I definitely see myself in a lot of the "western" ways.
The article continues with how the stereotypical Western mother concerns herself with how her child _feels_ (and therefore, implying mediocrity) vs. 'forcing' them to do well (and feeling proud for working hard).
I do think my generation is way too "nice" to their children. We are always listening to them: why are you angry, sad, blah blah? Express yourself, tell me what's on your mind; I don't care that you are three, TELL ME HOW YOU FEEL!
I'll be reading Amy Chua's book. I can't wait to see if I can relate to either side. I remember, in the WSJ article, Amy tells a story about disciplining her child, only to have the people around her look at her in horror. That's happened to me although I can't remember what story it was that made people look at me like that.
I read this article to CJ and MiMi this morning. They were flabbergasted right from the start, with the first part (the part I quote in the beginning of this post). I told them I had some new parenting practices to take on. They didn't think that was quite so funny.
One thing I found resonative was that when the Chinese kid gets a B, the parents assume there is something wrong with the kid, but when the Western kid gets a B, the parents assume there is something wrong with the school/curriculum.
Parts of the article seriously bothered me--like the banning of sleepovers, play dates, and the callousness of motivation--but there was a fair amount of good stuff in there as well.
I certainly wouldn't be _happy_ in an environment like that, but would I be more productive, with better grades and a higher skill in piano and clarinet? Yes.
I guess we just value personal enjoyment more here.
I think we need to find a happy medium.
I plan on reading the book too... maybe we can plan a lunch date once we've both read it.