Yesterday I downloaded the transcript of a conversation between two well-known freelance writers. As I was skimming through it, one section in particular caught my eye. One of the speakers in describing his typical day said he often has two hours free in the middle of the day. That’s when he goes running or to the gym. I noticed he didn’t say that’s when “I go to the dry cleaners, take the kids for haircuts, do the laundry, clean the bathroom, go grocery shopping, etc.” He went on to say how lucky he is to have a wife who “loves to cook dinner,” and the other speaker chirped in that his “life would be over” without his wife.
I didn’t read this conversation looking for justification about why life is tough for women who work full-time outside the home. But when I stumble on stuff like this, it’s just so glaring.
Unless the wife is physically out of the picture, men often don’t know, realize, or think about all that the wife does. I know of a situation (in the U.S.) where the wife died and a few months after her death when he had sole responsibility for the household and the kids, the husband admitted he never realized how much his wife did around the house (granted, she was a full-time homemaker). Of course husbands can be asked to do more, beyond the obvious, but who enjoys being a nag?
There's a difference between telling and showing someone that you appreciate them. You need a little of both.
I don’t know him personally; he may be a good guy.
But he still sounds like a man!