Very nicely metered with a good rhythmic feel and consistency, yet Its all so victorious, When my father died I dreamed of him on a train, like a darkened subway, lighted by a single brown yellowish puce bulb, desolate and very noisy like clanking bones thundering down the track as it made its way to some Hades like terrain, implying I suppose a sense of sever displacement, loss, and so very alone, desolated.
Do you feel that death is a victory?
not a tear, not a smile,, nothing profoundly transformative, etheric, incandescent, dangerous or foreboding.
Should the poem stand alone or be context dependent?
Do you think a reader should have Greek mythology cerebrally hardwired for the ahaa effect to care about the writing?
If I go to google up Orpheus does your poem turn to light now that I am refamiliarized?
Hay I'm the new idiot and enjoy the interactions with others with plenty of my own failings and aspirations My comments are only good if they are useful to you, if I offer a point of view that touches or illuminates.
I'm no intellectual elitist but I do expect the readers of my "poems" to have educated themselves in the cultures of the world. I put a lot into my own personal education. that said I left school with nothing. I am of the kind that loves to uncover mysteries and I have enough respect for any readers that they are knowledgeable enough to rise to any platform of understanding. if not then they should do their research life is about nothing if not a constant bridge to learning and understanding. but if this poem doesn't touch you at all on any level I think that must be my failure.
Its good to have expectations of your readers, I wrote a poem about memory in terms of neuroscience. Should I ask you to read up to get my poem or should I as a poet have a way to engage as fully as possible irrespective of your neuroscience creds?
To what end am I writing ?
Its not just about the myth.
then I think you must remain truthful to your muse. should you compose a poem on memory in regards to neuroscience I would love to read it even though it maybe far beyond the limits of my meagre understanding. even though a handful could possibly comprehend you are duty bound to raise the limits of your art. have the respect for your readership otherwise what are we doing here little more than scribbling self indulgent characters in the dust will little of our true being to raise our fellow humans from the mires of ignorance.
Always painting like some one else, always painting last centuries or yesterdays paintings in search of myself driven by absence of individuation and fear, never in front of the curve.