It seems to be the thing to do these days when your life is altered by some sort of speed bump, start up a foundation. If you have the means, or access to the means that is. People at the lower end of the economic ladder might have fund raisers to help cover the unexpected bills that go along with these speed bumps. If enough money is raised to cover their own bills, the remainder might go to help others with the affliction.
I’ve been thinking about causes and diseases that attract multiple foundations, which then often compete for the same donation dollars. It’s that competition that got me thinking. I understand that people want to honor their lost loved one (the most frequent reason to start a foundation in my unofficial research) but perhaps there are other ways. A foundation has costs that take money off the top, whereas a donation to an existing organization in the person’s name could go directly to something useful for others still struggling through similar experiences.
Perhaps a singular purpose should be combined with a shared purpose to better serve the cause? The question is what is most important – a cure, a solution or establishing a permanence for the lost person? The best thing would be to find a method to do both.
When my dad died, we asked for donations in lieu of flowers to established causes that were meaningful to him. He had a nearly lifelong association with Boy Scouting and so we also created a camp scholarship in his name at our local council. I’m sure that money is long gone, mom was the point person with the council. We wanted his name to live on with an organization that he loved and supported in many ways. Hopefully there is a handful of young men out there somewhere who can say that they got to go to camp thanks to my dad.
Keeping the fund alive and continuous probably could have been accomplished, but it didn’t happen. And this was a relatively small effort in comparison to a foundation.
When mom died, we again asked for donations in her name in lieu of flowers, this time for ovarian cancer research through an established organization. I continue to give as part of the greater shared purpose to give families affected by this disease more solutions. And more time than we had with mom once she was diagnosed. Even if we had the means, I don’t think that we would have considered a foundation in her name. Associating with an effective and established organization allows our assistance to be multiplied.
I wonder at this moment what mom would have to say to my idea, she worked as a fund raiser for a large hospital in Chicago for years. She had some interesting stories about the large donors that they courted. Ego was often involved.
Well, he scurries about in my thoughts sometimes as I juggle the various parts of my life. It often seems to be the transitions from one aspect to another that are most difficult to time just right – leaving home for work, leaving work for an afternoon appointment of one kind or another. Getting to work on time seems to be quite difficult for everyone at one time or another (the disruptive weather this winter over much of the US as case in point), but for some it seems to be darn near impossible every day.
There was a teaser announcement on the news the other day that they would be doing a story on employee excuses for being late to work on a later broadcast (must have been a slow news day) and that got me thinking. As a boss I have had employees who have struggled with timeliness and as a person I have had moments of untimeliness.
I don’t think that I’ve been given any really interesting stories for tardiness from employees, nothing is coming to mind since I heard about this on the news. Perhaps it is because I’ve never demanded explanation. ‘Sorry that I’m late’ mostly suffices for me. If it becomes a pattern, we’ll talk – but it will be focused on solutions like changing your routine, possibly changing your start time, not on why. Reasoning is important, excuses are a waste.
As an employee I have had two instances that were a bit out of the ordinary and they occurred about a year apart.
The first was after my mom had died and since I wasn’t sleeping very well at that time, I wasn’t actually late just nearly so. I woke up that morning thinking of a particular photo of my mom from the previous Christmas so strongly that I had to find the picture. I could not start my day until I had that one and only that one photo with me. My responsible side argued that I didn’t need the photo to go about my work day and I could find the picture after work. But the pull was too powerful, grief demanded that I get my hands on that picture. I did find it, I put it in an envelope in my purse (I carry it still) and got on with my day.
On the morning of the second example, I was mentally ready for work – I was currently without a direct boss and reporting to the senior manager and I wanted to be sharp. I pushed the button for my garage door, it went up an inch or two and stopped. I pushed again and it went down. I pushed again and it whirred, but did nothing. Uh oh. I pulled the door up manually and it slammed back down (I found out later that the springs were shot.) Hmm. My boys were already at school. How could I get the car out of the garage? I called friends, family to find someone to hold the door open while I drove the car out. Time became short and I had to call the senior manager to explain that I couldn’t get my car out of the garage. I even thought about flagging down a stranger and asking them to hold the door open – I was getting desperate – when a friend called back and was able to come over to help.
What is your weirdest or best excuse for being late?
The nature of blogging lends itself to posting in early morning. Morning is a time for building energy, gathering thoughts to plan a successful day and not necessarily a time to bring up a plaintive, lamenting note. But seasonal transitions seem to lend themselves to a plaintive and wistful mindset, at least to me.
Evening seems to be the right time for plaintive reflection – not as heavy as a lugubrious or dolorous ponder but a few moments to think. The right sort of evening reflection can lead to a better day in the morning.
As thoughts for this post started to form in my head, I realized that plaintiveness is often best expressed in music. And songs by The Fixx and Counting Crows among others went through my head. But I really sat down to write when the evening light brought Taps to mind.
The mournful sound of a single bugle in the soft summer evening air brings me back to my childhood when my dad was Camp Director. This day is over, time to rest. Nature and humans have done what could be done in this day.
That moment when you realize that you are really an adult might just have something to do with motivating yourself to do an unpleasant task. We think of being an adult as finally getting to do all of the things that we were prevented from doing as kids. If I thought at all about all of the things that require prompting to do, I assumed that adults didn’t need that external push. I found out soon enough that I was wrong.
This topic is coming to mind because I’m trying to get up the energy to do my taxes. Bleh. There are some chores that I don’t like I have come to a neutral place on – I just do them and as long as things go smoothly, I don’t think too much about it. But taxes never seem to go smoothly. Just the act of gathering all the right paperwork is so tedious that it brings out the obstinate little pouty kid who shouts ‘you can’t make me’ over and over.
My sister used to have a friend who went to the trouble to run the vacuum throughout the house without turning it on in an act of defiant compliance. Even as a kid I thought that defied logic – if you are going to go to the trouble to run it over the carpet, how hard is it to turn it on? But I also get the defiance, the dig your heels in contrariness of the act.
Sometimes even as adults we need to have someone else make us do something – hence the need for many laws – things that will give us great benefit like eating healthy, saving for retirement, getting our teeth cleaned.
There must be a solid evolutionary reason why we are so obstreperous at times. I have found myself splitting into two minds – one is being terribly unruly and the other is consternated not only by the childish stand but also by the choice of the fit. Why-ever have I chosen to cling to this particular cliff?
How about you, what was the oddest situation where you dug your heels in?