I wrote a letter to a friend who had suffered a bad setback. It was unlikely that her life was going to unfold the way she had hoped. She was angry and depressed. But after she received the letter she started to feel better … in fact, her outlook improved so much that she started sharing the letter with other people who were also feeling down about their lives. Since the letter helped so much, I decided to post it here (with a few details left out, to respect my friend’s privacy). If you’re in the middle of tough times, I hope this will help. Actually, I know it will help, if you will just do what it says.
You wrote, “I’m going to need for God to make some serious changes in my heart and my attitude….” I was glad to read your words, because I think that’s exactly the right prayer for you right now. In fact, every single time I pray for you, I get the strongest sense that there is a path to deep joy and peace for all of you in this, but you can’t set out along that path until you adjust your thinking. The path involves complete rejection of everything you hoped would happen in the years ahead, and sincere acceptance of whatever God desires instead.
Starting immediately, thank God for every gift He gives, from those as small as a whiff of honeysuckle or jasmine in your backyard, to the realization that you just had a few moments without pain, to really big things like the fact that your husband is in the next room safe and sound.
…intentional gratitude is not as easy as it sounds.
Rather than being a Pollyanna suggestion, this is an extremely powerful spiritual technique that will eliminate the self-centered and negative thinking that distances us from the Lord. In a life filled with the practice of intentional gratitude, there can be no “Yes, but…” or “It’s not fair,” or “Why me” downward spiraling kinds of thinking. The two attitudes simply do not mix.
Also, to focus on life’s gifts you must live in the moment. With the practice of intentional gratitude, there is no time for regrets about the past, or worries about the future. There is only thankfulness for the here and now.
This is the secret to contentment in any circumstance that Paul mentioned. It’s also the secret to Paul’s apparently impossible command to pray without ceasing, because every expression of gratitude is a prayer, which means the practice of intentional gratitude leads directly to a life lived in continual worship.
But another reason this is not a Pollyanna suggestion is that intentional gratitude is not as easy as it sounds. Part of living in a fallen world is a default setting that causes us to take most of life’s details for granted, when in fact almost every part of every day is a direct gift from God. So especially at first, you may have to work at recognizing blessings for what they are, and at giving thanks as blessings come throughout your day. It’s not easy, but it’s simple and actionable, and if you do take this seriously and work at it until it becomes a routine part of life, I promise unconditionally that you will regain your joy.
That’s just one of many wise insights in this report about Montañez’s recent commencement address to the graduating class at Chaffey College, a two year community college in Rancho Cucamonga, California. Speaking to graduates receiving associate degrees and occupational certificates, Montañez shared the story of his rise from a factory janitor to PepsiCo’s director of multicultural sales and marketing across North America.
In addition to personal pride and hard work, Richard Montañez used his head and heart to succeed. School was difficult because he never heard English in his parent’s Spanish speaking household. He dropped out of high school. But as an adult he learned to read and write in English. And although he was “only” a janitor, when he had a good idea (Montañez invented Pepsico’s “Flamin’ Hot Cheetos” recipe) he had the courage to suggest it directly to the company’s CEO.
Would they let Richard Montañez speak at U.C. Berkeley?
Montañez’s rags-to-riches story is proof that the American dream still exists today for those willing to take risks and work hard, regardless of one’s roots. “He comes from a modest upbringing; his father and grandfather worked in the vineyards of what was then known as Guasti, near Ontario International Airport. He is one of 11 children, the eldest male.” He had no “privilege” growing up, white or otherwise, yet today he’s on the boards of some of America’s most influential institutions, including the Southern Christian Leadership Conference where he is the first Latino ever to hold that position.
The “can-do” gumption and common sense advice in Montañez’s address to the graduating class of a two year community college stands in stark contrast to the pampered mindset of “safe spaces” and “trigger warnings” so prevalent in our major universities, where faculty and students would rather riot than listen to ideas that make them uncomfortable. Young people desperately need to hear from more people like Richard Montañez. What a pity it is when they won’t allow it.
Any government action motivated by discrimination against a person’s religious belief is morally wrong, not to mention unconstitutional, and not to mention foolish. After all, if President Trump were to ban Muslims today based on his alleged bigotry against them, what would stop him from banning Baptists tomorrow, based on the actions of those nasty people from the so-called Westboro “Baptist” Church?
But a government employee’s personal motive doesn’t always matter, not even the President’s.
Many people believe FDR was personally prejudiced against Asians because of his WWII decision to imprison all Japanese-Americans while leaving citizens of German or Italian descent at liberty. Even the lefties over at the Huffington Post think FDR was a bigot. If they’re right, and if Politico is also right, wouldn’t that mean FDR’s declaration of war against Japan was discriminatory?
Stuff and nonsense, of course.
Sometimes ugly personal motives and righteous public policy align. And in a situation when we know that 100% of Islamic terrorists are self professed Muslims, it is illogical to assert that a more stringent visa application vetting process for foreign Muslims is discriminatory simply because Trump may be personally bigoted against Muslims. That’s doubly true when his policy is focused on a short list of countries with governments which are barely holding onto their own power, and are much too unstable to participate in a reasonably diligent immigration vetting process on their end. Given those facts, which are not about the practice of religion, Trump’s personal motive has nothing to do with the public purpose of the policy, which is sound and reasonable to anyone with common sense.
Might this explain how Donald Trump, a man so clearly filled with foolishness in so many ways, might nonetheless be getting so much right?
Might this explain how Donald Trump, a man so clearly filled with foolishness in so many ways, might nonetheless be getting so much right? Might it explain how anybody gets anything right, since we all make fools of ourselves from time to time?
It’s certainly my theory, and I’m sticking with it.