As much as we’d like to show that we don’t care about what others think about us, we do. Some people are so pre-occupied with it, they seldom take part in things they like. Whether it’s the feeling of embarrassment, or the fear of being laughed at, caring too much only holds us back from what we want.
Here are few signs to watch for if you’re concerned that you are worrying too much about what others think of you.
In an attempt to ensure everyone likes you, you may do and say things that aren’t really you. You aren’t living your best, most authentic life, which leaves you feeling miserable and alone. When you are continuously doing or saying what others want, you are cheating yourself from what you want. It’s impossible to please everyone all of the time.
Whenever someone asks you to do a favor for them, you automatically feel obliged to agree to help them, even when that might negatively affect your job or another aspect of your life. You have a hard time saying no because you don’t want to let them down. If they feel disappointed, you worry they will stop liking you.
You constantly think about what you are saying and your manner of speaking. You are your worse critic, and you constantly self-censor yourself. Taking the safe route every time will make you seem like the quiet, shy type – never offending anyone, but never standing up for what you believe in. You are sure to miss out on opportunities to share your opinions/ideas and form new relationships.
You are constantly trying to observe each and every one to check if anyone has noticed you falling short of expectations. More importantly, you are trying to look at yourself from someone else’s angle. The constant worrying and thinking will never let you be satisfied with the way you are and the way you do things.
Even though, deep down you know that constructive feedback is good for you and will actually help you excel, you just can’t deal with it. Useful and potentially valuable criticism gets you down, which leads to you telling yourself that you are not good enough.
Even when you are taking yourself out of your comfort zone to prove useful to others, you feel hesitant to ask for anyone’s help. You worry that you will be judged for not being competent or capable enough to handle things on your own.
If these situations sound familiar, or you KNOW that you’ve thought or felt this way more than once, it’s time to take another look at your own opinion of yourself. Don’t let the desire to be a part of the “in crowd” or just to have someone as a friend convince you that its okay to hide your true self, or hide your light under a bushel.
You have something unique and special to offer your local community, your circle of friends, and the world you move within. Try to stop worrying about what others are thinking about you, and stretch out beyond your comfort zone. Give them something to talk about, and enjoy the boost in your self-esteem and self-confidence.
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