Everything was organized, planned and ready to go except what time we would be leaving the following morning for our weekend getaway to accomplish a silly seven-year dream of mine–the dream of touring the Christmas Story house in Cleveland, Ohio. I thought we would sleep in a little later than usual and even make breakfast together, before dropping our foster princess off with relatives around noon. Those were my plans but little did I know that somewhere between me holding a perfectly checked off ‘to-do’ list in my hands and my inability to know my geography, my plans would change.
Wait! What?! Eight hours?! It takes eight hours? No I didn’t know it took eight hours. Four…maybe five if we stop to eat, but not eight. I thought to myself, how did I miss this small, yet important detail? And within seconds I went from being giddy and excited to reluctant and wondering if it would be worth it. Would it be worth the extra time? Worth the extra money? Worth the additional stress as I had to change plans and schedules?
Looking up at my husband, I asked if he thought it was worth it. What if it didn’t meet my expectations? What if it was just another thing added to my list of regrets? And His response? “What if you didn’t take the risk and go? Wouldn’t that also make the list?” With that final thought, we went. And can I just say that the eight long hours in which I listened to my husband sing everything from Christmas carols to Willie Nelson was worth it. The extra money that I had never planned on spending was worth it. Even the stress of traveling in over nine inches of unexpected snow and blizzard like conditions was worth it.
Because it was worth it all to see the “Major Award” shining bright in the front room window as we rounded the corner on to 11th street; and I will never forget standing on the sidewalk that night, looking up at the house with snow falling all around me and thinking about how I almost missed this opportunity simply because it didn’t fit into my already prearranged plans and time frame. I couldn’t believe I almost let a few obstacles stand in my way of having that special moment and this awesome memory because in the end, it was absolutely worth it.
It was absolutely worth it to not know in advance how long the journey would have taken or how many obstacles would have stood in my way because if I had known, I would not have even bothered to plan the trip. I wouldn’t be talking about how it was one of the most amazing weekends I have ever had with my husband. Or how awesome it was to see my favorite Christmas movie come to life. Instead, I would be telling you about how it was still another box left to be checked on my bucket list. Another dream still a dream. Another desire still unfilled. Another regret added to the list of regrets.
My sweet friend, maybe you are sitting at your desk, on the couch, or in the waiting room at a doctor’s office and wondering how much longer it will be for you to have the desires of your heart fulfilled. You have convinced yourself that if only you knew about some of the twists and turns up ahead, then it would make the journey easier to move forward. It would take away all your fears and doubts. But let me ask you this: Would it be better to know? Or would it just cause you to second guess not only yourself, but also your dreams? Would it make you fret about whether it is worth it? Worth the extra time waiting? The extra money spent? The additional stress and potential for heartache? Would it make you choose to do something else–something with fewer risks or something that was easier, yet not what you really want? And so in the end, you are still adding to your list of regrets…the regret of not taking that chance. The regret of not trying just one more time. Or waiting just a bit longer.
I can’t help but think our heavenly Father, who could tell us everything, keeps certain details of the journey hidden because He knows that if we knew how long it would take, or what obstacles stood in the way, then we wouldn’t go forward. We wouldn’t have faith to trust in Him. We might even let fear take over and chose a different path other than the one He had planned for us to take. Or worse, we would just forget about our dreams and desires all together…give up on them before we even got started. And so because of these reasons, He doesn’t tell us every detail, or bump in the road because in the end, He loves us too much to just sit back and watch us not live our lives to the fullest.
So to the one reading this today who in this moment is tired, worn out, hopeless and wondering if it will even be worth it to keep going, keep getting up and to keep trying time and time again, can I just encourage you today that if God gave you the dream and placed the desire in your heart, then the answer is always yes.
It is yes to the ‘momma in waiting’ who is wondering if she should keep pursuing her dream of having a precious little one to call her own–whether naturally, through adoption or other means. I pray that as you keep trying and waiting for that day, you know that while the journey might be long and clouded with obstacles, it will be worth it.
It is yes to the foster Momma who is struggling with this journey that is so full of uncertainty. I pray that you understand that no matter how many tears you shed for those precious little ones or the heartache you endure each time one comes or goes, it will be worth it.
And it is yes to the woman sitting alone in her living room, wondering if a man will ever love her enough to one day give her a ring. I pray that you trust God is working on your behalf and molding your future husband to be the Godly man He needs him to be for you; because if you are patient and do not rush, I promise, it will be worth it.
So trust in Him through the twists and turns, the unexpected delays, and change of plans. Trust in Him through the obstacles, the fears, the doubts and the heartache. Because in the end, we can rest knowing that our heavenly Father, through His grace and mercy, will make sure the journey will be absolutely worth it.
And yes…we did come home with our very own leg lamp to proudly display in our front room window!
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I can’t get over the fact that you guys went there! Who knew it even existed?! Too cool. Just too cool.
Elisha, I so desperately needed to read these words today. Thanks for writing them. I know you have to spend time with the Lord to develop this this kind of insight. I appreciate it. Really. I sure love you.
I dont know how i escaped childhood without it. I never even heard of it until I was in college!
I have lots to say here!!! First of all this is my very favorite Christmas movie too!!! I leave the TV on TBS (I think it’s TBS right??) the entire 24 hours of A Christmas Story 🙂 Don’t nobody better turn it off!! lol Super jealous you got to go there, I may have to add that to my list!
This is a great post and so very true!! At this moment I am for sure in the waiting period and no matter what happens I know it will all be worth it!
Thank you so very much for the sweet card! You know just when to send some encouragement and your words are always perfect!
Girl! I now know the next thing I am going to send you! THE MOVIE! My parents bought it for me years ago because I complained that I basically only got to watch it that 24 hours it was on TBS every year. Needless to say, starting at around Thanksgiving, it plays 24 hours a day in our house 🙂 bahaahaha! I don’t watch it. I just have it on for background noise. tehehe!
I needed this today. Thankful for the timing. It WILL be worth it!!!!! Thanks girl. Whew!
Oh, boy…I am sitting here crying. This was SUCH a touching post! It made me cry to see how excited you were to get to do something you have dreamed of, and it made me cry because your words hit such a raw nerve concerning something God has been teaching me. One day, I was praying, and He told me that as His children, we are like our own children…that if we tell them too soon that their birthday is coming up, or Christmas is coming, or we are going to take a trip, they will continually question us and become so frustrated with the waiting process, constantly asking “are we there yet?” and “is it Christmas yet?”, etc. I am only NOW after reading your post starting to really absorb exactly what God meant. I thought that since He has revealed a portion of His plan for our future to me that it must surely be right around the corner, that our waiting is over, and it is time to get excited! But, I think the main point He was trying to get across to me is that He is not going to show me the whole picture right now, because the “fullness of times” has not come, and I would just become more and more frustrated in the waiting process. We are HIS children, and He does what is best, even though it is so hard to wait. SO sorry to take up so much space here, but you will just never know how much this post helped me today. I NEEDED this…oh, my. Thank you for writing this and sharing what God laid on your heart. One more thing…YES, it will be worth it when you hold your sweet baby. After God sent us Zachary after 12 1/2 years of waiting, a lady said to me, “Wouldn’t it have been so much easier to wait if you had known what you had to look forward to?” I have never forgotten what she said. She was right. It is all about trust…one of the hardest things to do. 🙂 Love you, sweet friend. Merry Christmas!
I REALLY needed to read this right now, Elisha. Thank you so much for your never ending encouragement and for being such a beautiful example of faith!
This is a beautiful post. Every journey God takes us through is worth it, even the tough ones. So awesome your husband supports your ideas and pushes you to accomplish them. Have a great week.
I LOVE that you went to the house! Zoey absolutely LOVES that movie, which makes us giggle. She will be forever scarred by the frozen tongue-to-the-pole scene… forever. 😉 Thanks for this post – such a great reminder that we ALL needed!
Zoey has good taste in movies!
I always have wondered if we could look ahead and go, okay this is when it will happen, and have the opportunity to skip ahead to that point; bypassing everything in between, if it would actually happen.
Uplifting and beautiful as always! So glad you and hubby had a great time!
This one made me cry. I cannot tell you how many times in the last 4 days, I have wondered if it was time to quit this journey. Sometimes, it just seems like I don’t have enough strength to keep going. Maybe my life will be just fine without kids of my own. I’m glad you wrote this. God wanted you to write this for many people, I’m sure…and I was definitely one of them. Love you, dear friend. Merry Christmas to you and your awesome family!