Are You Managing a Family or Raising a Child?
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As you shuffle between so many activities, roles, and responsibilities, you wonder how you’re supposed to connect with your children and make your family strong.
I get it. It’s easy to lose sight of your children’s individual needs.
You have a lot on your plate, so it’s natural to go into business mode and view your child merely as an extension of your household system.
This is amped up even more when you have several children.
It is necessary to run your family as a whole system.
But when all your time and attention is consumed with managing a household, the individual care of each child and their emotional needs can get lost in the process.
You want your children to know that you see them, you honor them for who they are, and you support them individually. Even if you’re a busy parent, this can be more practical and easier than you think.
The Child Whisperer gives you an advantage by helping you see each child’s true nature. When you understand that you have a family of different Types of children, you’re equipped to be more attentive to them as individuals because you now see their unique differences from one another.
Tip #1. Recognize if you are too focused on externals in your conversations.
Are you mostly talking about chores, homework, activities and obligations, timelines, and going to bed! If so, you have reduced your communication with your child to the “doings” of their life and the ways they support how the home runs. You are focusing too much on their “outer” world.
Tip #2. Take time to go a little deeper.
Make sure you talk with each of your children on a personal and intimate level at least on a weekly basis. You want to know what’s going on in their “inner” world. Their thoughts, their feelings, their opinions, and ideas. Ask your child questions and really listen so you can get to know what is going on inside of them.
Tip #3. Notice the pace of your home.
Does it often feel rushed and hectic? Are you mostly coming and going? Is the television on when the family is home? Does the family sit and connect by talking together? Do you sit down to dinner on a regular basis?
Ask yourself what pace you want in your home. I was a busy mom when my children were growing. Knowing what I know now, I’d be sure to sit down more often with my children and just converse with them.
Tip #4. Prioritize a bedtime routine.
As your children get older, what are your bedtime practices? Do you have a bedtime “ritual” where you connect with them?
Even up until my youngest son was in high school, I made it a point to go into his room when he went to bed. Sometimes I’d lay down with him and chat; other times I would tuck him in and say good night.
I always made it a point to connect with each of my children before they fell asleep.
Tip #5. Make time to stop just for a second.
If the days seem to fly by and you miss opportunities with your children, remember that it doesn’t have to be a big, heavy thing. On overly busy days, it can be a quick touch point. Some ideas are to simply take their face in your hands or make good eye contact and tell them sincerely how much you love them.
Perhaps placing a note in their school lunch or buying each of them their favorite little treat while you are at the grocery store can communicate that you see them as the unique, special individuals that they are.
You can make time for your children & create a strong family, even on the busiest of days!
As a Child Whispering parent, I know your desire is to raise each of your children true to their nature. You’re doing a fabulous job!
Please share your successes if you have experienced a shift in this area. If you know a few things need to change in your home to help you get there, please share how are you going to create more of what you want.