i 've kissed guys where nothing was at stake , and all it ever made me want to do was to have a kiss where everything- '' i looked up at about the `` nothing was at stake , '' and i waited all the way until the `` everything '' and then i could n't wait anymore , and my hand was on the back of her head , and then her lips on mine , the cold air gone and replaced with the warmth of her mouth , soft and sweet and hash-brown-tastic , and i opened my eyes and my gloves touched the skin of her face pale from the cold , and i had never before had a first kiss with a girl i loved .