the proximity of her lips from my ears made me shudder in fear , `` it would be stupid to pretend you 're asleep , because your eeg tells us otherwise , '' `` i 'm not feigning sleep , '' i muttered , regretting every moment as each word slipped from my mouth , `` i just do n't want to see your hideous face , '' the next thing i knew she grabbed a fistful of my hair , a whimper escaped my lips .