the next day i took my psylocybin and fetched a newspaper , then spent all morning poring over the want ads , glorying in each new job i read about , jobs that i wouldnt feel terrified about having , that id be able to go to each weekday , jobs sitting at desks where i could have conversations with co-workers about things like last nights big game , jobs standing at counters serving customers and not worrying that the money they were handing me was being handed by a master assassin and at just such an angle so as to cause paper cuts [ 26 ] , jobs at zoos , jobs as salesmen , jobs doing plenty of things that i could would do .