it was the kind of village that invited massacre and doom -- there were lots of huts in the snow ; there were blacksmiths ' forges ; corrals for chickens and clydesdales ; thatched office towers with wattle and daub walls ; many starshekels coffee shops with internet connections ; big chariots that had been converted into diners where you could buy bratwurst or corned beef and cabbage ; quaint bed and breakfasts with maniacs lurking outside shower stalls , and pubs .