I gat fulap man mo woman wea olgeta hemi no save wanem hemi rape mo wanem hemi consent.
Taem wan man hemi silip wetem wan woman mo woman tu hemi wantem silip wetem hem, hemia CONSENT. Taem wan man hemi silip wetem wan woman be woman ia hemi no wantem silip wetem hem, hemia RAPE.
I gat fulap man wea olgeta hemi stap rapem wan woman afta olgeta hemi ting se fasin blong olgeta hemi no rape. Olgeta hemi ting se hemi ol raet blong makem fasin olsem ia from woman hemi drong or hemi stap wearem wan ‘sexy’ clothes or hemi talem ‘yes’ fes taem aftem hemi changem ting ting blong hem.
Ol kaen fasin ia hemi stap insaed long wan relationship tu – i gat some man wea olgeta oli ting se gelfren blong hem hemi mas silip wetem hem from olgeta stap insaed long wan relationship. Taem yu stap forcem wan woman, even sapos hemi gelfren blong yu, blong silip wetem yu – hemia i rape.
Ol woman hemi gat raet blong talem no. Ol man hemi mas respectem tok tok blong ol woman taem hemi no wantem makem samting wea yu wantem. Ol man tu hemi gat raet blong talem no. Ol kaen fasin ia hemi no wan problem blong woman nomo.
I gat wan bigfala difrens blong RAPE mo CONSENT – taem i gat two pipol wea olgeta hemi wantem makem sex, hemia i consent. Sapos i gat wan nomo wea hemi wantem makem sex, hemia i rape. Sapos hemi no esi blong save difrens, mifala traem blong talem gud wetem tok tok blong wan woman Nafisa Ahmed.
Hemi stap usem wan example long saed blong money blong explainem difrens blong rape mo consent.
“If you ask me for 500vt and I’m too drunk to say yes or no, it’s not okay to then go take 500vt out of my purse…..Just because I didn’t say no.”
Sapos yu wantem usem 500vt blong mi, be mi drong tumas blong talem yes or no, hemi no stret sapos yu karem aot 500vt blong wallet blong mi. Yu no gat raet blong karem 500vt from mi drong tumas blong tok tok and mi no save talem no.
“If you put a gun to my head to get me to give you 500vt, you still stole 500vt. Even if I physically handed you 500vt.”
Sapos yu tok tok strong long mi wetem wan musket or wan knife from yu wantem se mi giv 500vt long yu, yu wan steal man. Even sapos mi puttem money i go insaed long hand blong yu, hemi still meanem se yu wan steal man from yu stap force.
“If I let you borrow 500vt, that doesn’t give the right for your FRIEND to take 500vt out of my purse. ‘But you gave him some, why can’t I?’”
Sapos mi giv 500vt long yu, hemi no meanem se fren blong yu hemi save karem aot 500vt long wallet blong mi tu. ‘Yu stap silip wetem hem, from wanem yu no wantem silip wetem mi tu?’
“If you steal 500vt and I can’t prove it in court, that does NOT mean you didn’t steal 500vt.”
Sapos yu steal 500vt blong mi and mi no save provem i go long court, hemi no meanem se yu no stealem money. Hemi stap tru yet.
“Just because I gave you 500vt in the past, doesn’t mean I have to give you 500vt in the future.”
Sapos mi giv 500vt long yu bifo, hemi no meanem se mi mas give 500vt long yu now ia.
“If I sit in your lap and went to your house, that doesn’t mean I want to have sex. If I ask you to hold my purse, does that mean you can take my money?”
Sapos mi go long haos blong yu afta mi staon klasop long yu, hemi no meanem se mi wantem sex. Sapos mi askem long yu blong holdem wallet blong mi, hemi no meanem se i olraet long yu blong karem aot money blong mi.
Mifala hope se yu kasem difrens wetem rape mo consent wetem example ia!
This article was originally published in the August edition of the Vanuatu Daily Post Life and Style magazine.
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