I hated writing thank-you notes as a child, but I had no choice: My mother was adamant about honoring other people's kindness and generosity. But now after a childhood spent crafting those notes, the music of gratitude flows naturally from me. 

I hire Brant to build an arbor around my front door. I drew it exactly as I wanted, and he realized my vision perfectly. Surprised at how the arbor's beauty uplifted me every time I stepped into my house, I called Brant a few weeks after the arbor went up. He answered the phone defensively. 

"What can I do for you?" he asked, his voice cold and distant. 

"You can say, 'You're welcome,' " I responded. 

"I don't understand," Brant shot back. 

"I am calling to say 'Thank you.' '' 

Silence. 

"What do you mean?" he asked. 

"I love my arbor, and I wanted you to know how much I appreciate your work." 

More silence. 

"I've been doing this work for 20 years, and no one has ever called to thank me for it," said Brant. "People only call me when they have problems." He was doubtful. 

I also had a similar experience with L.J. He answered my questions, didn't push, and gave me space to think and decide. I wrote to let him know that he completely exceeded my expectations of what a beat-them-down car sales experience would be like, and that I was happy with my car choice. L.J. called me a few days later. He said that this was the first thank-you note in the history of the dealership. 

Are we really living in an age when feedback only closes with complaint? It seems to me that when we focus on problems, we only have dissatisfaction and complaint. But when we focus on celebrating goodness, we are likely to turn it into something positive. QUESTIONS:

Q1:
1. What is Brent's line of work?
2. What does Brent do for a living?
3. What is Brent's job?
Q2:
1. How long has Brent been in his line of work?
2. For how many years has Brent been a builder?
3. For how long has Brent been doing his job?
Q3:
1. Had a client ever called Brent before to thank him?
2. Had Brent ever received thanks from a client before?
3. Was Brent used to clients calling him to thank him?
Q4:
1. What is LJ's line of work?
2. What does LJ do for a living?
3. What is LJ's profession?
Q5:
1. Had a client ever gotten in touch with LJ before to thank him?
2. Had LJ ever received thanks from a client before?
3. Did LJ's dealership often have clients coming back to thank them?
Q6:
1. Why was the article's author thankful towards LJ?
2. What did the author appreciate about their interaction with LJ?
3. What did LJ do for the author of the article that was commendable?
Q7:
1. What remains, when we only focus on our problems?
2. When we become fixed on our problems, what's the only thing we have left?
3. What is all we have left when we choose to focus just on our problems?
Q8:
1. What did the author hire Brent to build?
2. What was Brent doing for the author?
3. What structure did Brent create for the author?
Q9:
1. Where is the arbor that Brent built located?
2. What part of the author's house is next to the arbor?
3. Where around their house did the author ask Brent to build the arbor?
Q10:
1. How did the author feel about the arbor?
2. What was the author's emotional reaction to the arbor?
3. What did seeing the arbor systematically provoke for the author?
Q11:
1. Did the author find the arbor pleasing?
2. Was the author content with the arbor?
3. Did the author take note of the arbor's beauty?
