the British government. Percy's career was focused on defeating the machinations of the sinister Lord Emmerich, a vicious mastermind with the head of a gorilla. In a flashback, Ben's mother Lucy (Sarah Linnegar) is held hostage by Lord Emmerich in his lair, inside a hollowed out Icelandic volcano. Percy breaks into the facility and confronts Emmerich, defeating him and rescuing his bride. Sensing his defeat, Emmerich sets the self-destruct sequence, causing the volcano to erupt and kill them all. Ben relates his troubles to Scarlett over a game of billiards in the Fairport Academy bar. She reveals she lusted after Ben's father when she was growing up, and they trade innuendo as she beats him decisively. As they get more and more drunk, she delivers a rambling speech to him about hero worship and they almost kiss. The next morning, Ben invites Scarlett down to the disused concert hall, and shows her his plan to resurrect the school's tradition of concerts, which used to be filled by the ghosts of dead rock stars. Ben's strategy is to run school talent quests, then start to bring in notable living performers, like Bruce Springsteen. An impressed Scarlett joins Ben on the stage and they perform a duet of the Fairport Academy School Song. The print becomes scratchy and is replaced by a technical difficulties card. The projectionist (Max Newstead) phones the director of the film (Jeremy Dylan) and explains that he's lost the next two reels of the film. Dylan is concerned that this skips a number of important plot points, but they conclude that no one will notice. Kenneth restarts the projector. Elvis Costello and Paul McCartney have just left the stage as Ben concludes his performance at the school talent quest to rapturous applause. Later, Ben sleeps uneasily. Ben dreams he's back in the concert hall, watching Johnny Leroy and the Impulsives perform on stage. In the second verse, Leroy transforms into the Lord Emmerich, who leaps down from the stage and menaces Ben, demanding to know the 'secret of the cauldron of penguins'. Ben awakes with a start. Scarlett comes to his door to check on him, but Ben assures her it was merely a bad dream. A concerned Scarlett calls Pentangle in Germany and relays the news. Ben is plagued by another dream involving Lord Emmerich and the Cauldron of Penguins, this time more violent, and awakes in