Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness? is a 1969 British musical film directed by and starring Anthony Newley. Plot Merkin is an internationally successful singer approaching middle age who retells his life story in a series of production numbers on a seashore in front of his two toddlers and aged mother. Merkin's promiscuous relationships with women are explored, particularly Polyester Poontang and the adolescent Mercy Humppe. Merkin compares the relationship with Mercy Humppe to that of Humbert Humbert and Lolita. Merkin is constantly surrounded by a Satan-like procurer, Goodtime Eddie Filth, and an angelic 'Presence' who interrupts Merkin's biography with cryptic Borscht Belt-level jokes to denote births and deaths in Merkin's life. Newley periodically steps out of character to complain about his 'Merkin' role with an unseen director, two screenwriters, the film's producers and a trio of blasé movie critics who are turned off by the story's eroticism and lack of plot. Cast Anthony Newley – Heironymus Merkin/Director Joan Collins – Polyester Poontang Milton Berle – Goodtime Eddie Filth George Jessel – The Presence Bruce Forsyth – Uncle Limelight Stubby Kaye – Fat Writer Connie Kreski – Mercy Humppe Patricia Hayes – Grandma Victor Spinetti – Critic Sharpnose Ronald Radd – Critic Bentley Rosalind Knight – Critic Penelope Louis Negin – Producer Peter Julian Orchard – Red Cardinal Judy Cornwell – Filigree Fondle Margaret Nolan - Little Assistance Production notes The film was shot on the island of Gozo. The set designer for the dream sequences was Loudon Sainthill, who died shortly after finishing his work on the film. Reception In 1970, Newley and his co-writer Herman Raucher won the Writers' Guild of Great Britain Award for Best British Original Screenplay. The film's original music was written by Newley with lyrics by Herbert Kretzmer (Les Misérables). The film was controversial because it was X rated in its original release, meaning many newspapers in the U.S. would not take advertising for it. The film was a commercial, and generally a critical, failure. Vincent Canby wrote in The New York Times that Newley "so over extends and overexposes himself that the movie comes to look like an act of professional suicide...The movie is as self-indulgent as a burp. It's also as pretentious as its form...The movie is not so free and loose as it is simply out of control." In The Sunday Times Guide to Movies on