then, recovery has been difficult, considering also the fact that the civil wars in 1955-1973 and 1983-2005 have further taken their toll on the Bari. Courtship and marriage In the past, it was not uncommon for the Bari to use intermarriage to form bonds between two families. Although these arrangements were sometimes made when the children were very young, the bride price was not necessarily paid until the betrothed children reached marrying age. Today, marriage among the Bari more often involves a period of courtship followed by consent of the families involved. After a period of courtship, the male suitor usually declares his intent to marry (nyara in Bari) by presenting himself at the house of the girl's parents, accompanied by a few close relatives and friends. Before the wedding ceremony (budu, typically several months later), the families meet in the bride's parents' house to negotiate the bride price that the bridegroom is obligated to offer; the parents of the bride and bridegroom are never directly involved in these negotiations, though they may be involved indirectly and behind the scenes. Because the Bari have long been agro-pastoralists, the bride price is traditionally paid in the form of live animals. A typical bride price might be composed of two dozen cattle and 40 head of sheep and goats. When the use of animals is too difficult, such as in the case of drought or natural disaster, bride prices in the form of cash may also be acceptable. Behaviors considered disrespectful may increase the bride price during negotiations (though it is also possible for civil courts to get involved); these can include premarital sex, eloping, and aggression towards in-laws. Once the negotiations are successful, both families bless the marriage and commence in a feast that involves drinking and dancing. After the feast, the bridegroom returns home alone, but after about two weeks, the bride arrives to take charge of her house. For Bari who have converted to Christianity, an additional step occurs wherein the marriage also receives a church blessing. Ideally, this would occur before the husband and wife begin living together. However, because of the financial burden of having both a Bari traditional wedding feast and a Christian wedding ceremony, the trend has been to first have the traditional feast and then put off the Christian wedding for a year or longer while the couple saves up money for the occasion.