to this: Was I a turd-reading Finch? Or was I my crazy mother's son? In the end, I decided that I was neither." Characters Augusten Burroughs The main character, son of Deirdre and Norman, was sent to live with his psychotic mother's psychiatrist, Dr. Finch, and his family at the age of 13 and is eventually signed off to the Finch family. He has mild obsessive compulsive tendencies. It is at the Finch house where he enters into a relationship with Neil, trying to live with the insane and dirty living conditions of the Finches while coping with his mother's mental condition. He has a close relationship with Natalie, Dr. Finch's youngest daughter. He has a passion for hair products, wanting to have his name on a line of hair products. Deirdre Burroughs Deirdre is the mother of Augusten and was married to Norman until their divorce. She is a mentally unstable poet, who, after her divorce, engages in a relationship with the local minister's wife. She allows Augusten to pretend to attempt suicide so he can be released from school. She has a relationship with a teenage girl after the minister's wife will not divorce her own husband. Dr. Finch The psychiatrist of Deirdre, father of Natalie and Hope, and "husband" of Agnes Finch. Although Agnes and Dr. Finch are technically married, Dr. Finch has multiple other relationships with various women, all of whom he calls his wife, saying that Agnes is only his "legal" wife and doesn't understand him. Dr. Finch takes Augusten in, and later legally adopts him, after Deirdre decides she cannot handle the emotional stress of mothering Augusten. Dr. Finch's psychiatric methods are highly unconventional; he unwittingly makes his patients worse instead of curing them by giving them unmarked medicines, using techniques that disturb them, and generally encouraging their unhealthy behavior. Neil Bookman The adopted son of Dr. Finch. Soon after Burroughs moves in with the Finches, Neil, who was 33, forms a sexual relationship with Burroughs, who was only 13. He becomes infatuated with and very protective of Burroughs, who rarely returns these feelings, but still maintains a relationship with him. His infatuation eventually turns to obsession and he constantly tells Burroughs he would die if Burroughs left him. Natalie Finch The youngest daughter of Dr. Finch and Agnes who is seen as wild, unruly, and promiscuous throughout the memoir, giving her first hand