It's a front for a sleazy peep show. Occasionally a strip would have Tarquin showing little involvement, or none at all in the parents' end. A Christmas themed strip had Tarquin reprimanded for wanting toys for Christmas "when there is so much suffering in the world". Malcolm attempts to make amends by dressing as a "nature spirit", which is foiled when he jumps out in front of a neighbor's child, mistaking him for Tarquin, and is beaten and apprehended by the child's father, having recently heard news of a child molestor in the area. Cressida cancels her plans with Tarquin to sort it out with the police, leaving Tarquin some money for the health foods store. Tarquin uses it to get the toys he wished for, as well as pizza while watching the Christmas day James Bond film. Despite his female name, Guinevere is a boy. Wanting to avoid gender stereotyping, Malcolm and Cressida occasionally try to make one or both of their sons wear girls' clothes or take "female" roles in some psychobabble ceremony. Guinevere was born during the course of the comic strip and after growing to his current age of about five or six, stopped there. Tarquin appeared to get older in the early years of Modern Parents and in one episode turned thirteen. Guinevere, whose name is usually just shortened to "Guin" by his brother, is largely a passive character, easily upset, his big brother often coming to his rescue. Guinevere's first word was football although Malcolm and Cressida were keen for it to be dolphin. Other characters Malcolm and Cressida have many friends, notably Ashley and Cordelia in the Ethically Aware Parents Support Group, who, like them, are middle-class, politically correct and often into various causes. Most of them have children who, without exception, have the same despairing and uncooperative attitude towards their parents as Tarquin and Guinevere. Cressida's brother, Edward – more commonly known as simply Uncle Eddie – acts as a counter-weight to his sister and brother-in-law and treats his two nephews, Tarquin and Guinevere, like normal boys. 'Guest' characters include Dr Earnest Rabbitt (who is firmly opposed to killing animals) and Professor Ruth Lesscow (an extreme women's rights activist). In earlier episodes of the strip, Tarquin had a friend called Ian, of whom his parents clearly disapproved, and once a girlfriend called Dawn, of whom Malcolm and Cressida thought Tarquin was controlling