achieving an athletic scholarship to the University of Arizona, Beard began to struggle with body dysmorphia disorder. Stress from wearing a swimsuit in front of others as well as seeing the photo-shopping process of her ads caused Beard to desire having a body which matched that in her photos. Beard has said that "even if it had hurt my swimming, I wouldn't have stopped. I wanted to be a great swimmer, but more than that, I wanted to be pretty, skinny, and perfect." Autobiography Beard released an autobiography on April 3, 2012, entitled In the Water They Can't See You Cry: A Memoir. She explains the title's significance as the sensation of putting her face in the water while swimming to hide any tears she shed into her goggles. The book cites her parents' divorce at the age of 12 as the beginning of her personal struggles, as well as her perfectionist nature. In the memoir, Beard chronicles struggles with self-mutilation, depression and drug use. She credits her husband with encouraging her to seek therapy. Personal bests Beard's personal bests in long-course meters are: 100 m breaststroke: 1:07.42, 2003 World Aquatics Championships 200 m breaststroke: 2:22.44, 2004 U.S. Olympic Swimming Trials 2004 200 m individual medley: 2:11.70, 2004 Summer Olympics Bibliography Beard, Amanda with Rebecca Paley. In the Water They Can't See You Cry: A Memoir. New York, Simon & Schuster, April 3, 2012. . See also List of Olympic medalists in swimming (women) List of University of Arizona people List of World Aquatics Championships medalists in swimming (women) World record progression 200 metres breaststroke References External links 1981 births American female breaststroke swimmers American female medley swimmers Arizona Wildcats women's swimmers Female models from California Living people Medalists at the 1996 Summer Olympics Medalists at the 2000 Summer Olympics Medalists at the 2004 Summer Olympics Medalists at the FINA World Swimming Championships (25 m) Olympic bronze medalists for the United States in swimming Olympic gold medalists for the United States in swimming Olympic silver medalists for the United States in swimming Sportspeople from Irvine, California Sportspeople from Newport Beach, California Swimmers at the 1996 Summer Olympics Swimmers at the 2000 Summer Olympics Swimmers at the 2004 Summer Olympics Swimmers at the 2008 Summer Olympics Universiade medalists in swimming Universiade silver medalists for the United States World Aquatics Championships medalists in swimming World record setters in swimming Medalists at the