buttered loaves with thinly sliced cucumbers. "Kettle drums" "Kettle drums" came about in 18th and 19th centuries and are informal large afternoon parties for tea. At kettle drums, guests traditionally came for short periods and left at will, mingled and conversed with little formality, and partook of tea, chocolate, lemonade, cakes, and sandwiches. Guests were expected to dress for ordinary daytime visiting, but not more formally. Per false folk etymology, the name "kettle drum" is said to have originated in the informal tea gatherings hosted by British camp officers' wives during East India Company rule or the British occupation of India, during which kettle drums are claimed to have served as tea tables in the camps. Alternatively, "kettle drum" may have been an amalgam of "drum" — 18th-century slang for a vivacious party — and "kettle" for the tea served. Etiquette Tea party etiquette depends on the customs and accepted standards of behaviour of a given time period and place. 1900 etiquette demonstrated etiquette to be linked with conservative and rigid gender roles. Manners were of utmost importance in the proper conduct of men and women in early tea parties. There are several rules of etiquette noted during the 19th and 20th centuries. Various rules of etiquette included: Learn to be patient Restrain your temper Refrain from speaking in anger Silence is more valuable than speech Children's parties Tea parties are sometimes hosted by young children where the guests consist of stuffed animals, dolls, friends (both real and imaginary) and family members. Alice's Tea-Party In Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, in the chapter "A Mad Tea-Party", Alice becomes a guest at a tea party along with the March Hare, the Hatter, and a sleeping Dormouse who remains asleep for most of the chapter. The other characters give Alice many riddles and stories, including the famous 'Why is a raven like a writing desk?'. The Hatter reveals that they have tea all day because time has punished him by eternally standing still at 6 pm (tea time). Alice becomes insulted and tired of being bombarded with riddles and she leaves, claiming that it was the stupidest tea party that she had ever been to. Global analogs Yum cha is the Chinese equivalent of a tea party, usually held in a restaurant. The German "Kaffeeklatsch", literally "coffee gossip", is an afternoon gathering – stereotypically of housewives – in which coffee or