strain in the relationship between nuclear and extended family members, children in a rebellion phase, and ideological differences in belief systems. Laundry List The program "Adult Children of Alcoholics" includes something labeled as a "Laundry List". The Laundry List is core literature of the program Adult Children of Alcoholics. This list has 14 different statements that relate to being an adult child of a parent with an alcohol addiction. These statements provide commentary on how children have been affected by the trauma of having alcoholic parents. Some highlights of the statements include, "confusing love and pity", "having low self-esteem", and having a "loss of identity". The Laundry list is a helpful tool in group therapy in order to show families that they are not alone in their struggles. Female children whose parents were alcoholics have an increased risk of developing depression. Male children of alcoholics are at a significantly higher risk for developing a substance use disorder. Parenting Unhealthy signs Unhealthy parenting signs, which could lead to a family becoming dysfunctional include: Unrealistic expectations Ridicule Conditional love Disrespect; especially contempt. Emotional intolerance (family members not allowed to express the "wrong" emotions.) Social dysfunction or isolation (for example, parents unwilling to reach out to other families—especially those with children of the same gender and approximate age, or do nothing to help their "friendless" child.) Stifled speech (children not allowed to dissent or question authority.) Denial of an "inner life" (children are not allowed to develop their own value systems.) Being under- or over-protective Apathy ("I don't care!") Belittling ("You can't do anything right!") Shame ("Shame on you!") Bitterness (regardless of what is said, using a bitter tone of voice.) Hypocrisy ("Do as I say, not as I do.") Lack of forgiveness for minor misdeeds or accidents Judgmental statements or demonization ("You are a liar!") Being overly critical and withholding proper praise. (experts say 80–90% praise, and 10–20% constructive criticism is the most healthy.) Double standards or giving "mixed messages" by having a dual system of values (i.e. one set for the outside world, another when in private, or teaching divergent values to each child.) The absentee parent (seldom available for their child due to work overload, alcohol/drug abuse, gambling, or other addictions.) Unfulfilled projects, activities, and promises affecting children ("We'll do it later.") Giving to one child what rightly belongs to another Gender prejudice (treats one gender of children fairly; the