clear goals and objectives As well as the above, the basic principles for a couples therapist also include: To identify the repetitive, negative interaction cycle as a pattern. To understand the source of reactive emotions that drive the pattern. To expand and re-organize key emotional responses in the relationship. To facilitate a shift in partners' interaction to new patterns of interaction. To create new and positively bonding emotional events in the relationship To foster a secure attachment between partners. To help maintain a sense of intimacy. Common core principles of relationship counseling and couples therapy are: Respect Empathy Tact Consent Confidentiality Accountability Expertise Evidence based Certification and ongoing training In both methods, the practitioner evaluates the couple's personal and relationship story as it is narrated, interrupts wisely, facilitates both de-escalations of unhelpful conflict and the development of realistic, practical solutions. The practitioner may meet each person individually at first, but only if this is beneficial to both, is consensual, and is unlikely to cause harm. Individualistic approaches to couple problems can cause harm. The counselor or therapist encourages the participants to give their best efforts to reorient their relationship with each other. One of the challenges here is for each person to change their own responses to their partner's behavior. Other challenges to the process are disclosing controversial or shameful events, and revealing closely guarded secrets. Not all couples put all of their cards on the table at first. This can take time, and requires patience, and commitment to the repair of the relationship. Novel practices A novel development in the field of couples therapy has involved the introduction of insights gained from affective neuroscience and psychopharmacology into clinical practice. Oxytocin There has been interest in use of the so-called love hormone – oxytocin – during therapy sessions, although this is still largely experimental and somewhat controversial. Some researchers have argued oxytocin has a general enhancing effect on all social emotions, since intranasal administration of oxytocin also increases envy and Schadenfreude. Also, oxytocin has also the potential for being abused in confidence tricks. Popularized methodologies Although results are almost certainly significantly better when professional guidance is utilized (see especially family therapy), numerous attempts at making the methodologies available generally via self-help books and other media are available. In the last few years, it has become increasingly popular for these self-help books to become popularized and published as an e-book available