
The door stood open and Blair looked inside. Oz lay on top of the bed with Addy snoring softly and curled into the crook of his arm. She looked completely relaxed, at peace. The even rise and fall of Oz's chest told her he was asleep, too.
Longing caught flame in Blair's belly, spreading warmth throughout her body, filling her with wants she'd long denied---wants that involved Addy having a father, someone to love her and care for her the way Blair did.
During her pregnancy she'd dreamed of her daughter having a family. One that involved a mommy and a daddy.
She hadn't dreamed that dream in years.
But she'd never witnessed her little girl tucked safely in a man's arms.
They looked...content.
As if they belonged together.
Dear Reader,
Ever met someone you just knew was bad for you, yet you couldn't seem to avoid no matter how hard you tried? As if fate had stepped in and crisscrossed your paths to throw you together?
Having lost her faith in love, Blair Pendergrass is frustrated that no matter where she turns, revered heart surgeon Dr. Oz Manning is there. He's a through and through playboy and certainly not what she wants or needs in her life. But whether Oz is saving someone's life or playfully tossing spaghetti at her, she just can't resist him and soon finds herself falling for a man she knows she can never have and shouldn't want.
Needless to say, I fell in love with Oz. He's such a fun hero during a time when Blair most needs to learn to laugh again. We all need someone in our lives who can make us smile even during days when we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. May all of you be loved by that special someone who has that smile-giving ability.
I love to hear from readers. Please e-mail me at Janice@janicelynn.net or visit me at www.janicelynn.net to find out my latest news.
Happy reading!
Janice
PLAYBOY SURGEON, TOP-NOTCH DAD
To every woman who has ever closed her eyes and lived the fantasy on the pages.
And to Lindsey Brookes for bringing so much laughter into my life. I love you, girl!
CONTENTS
HOW was cardiac nurse Blair Pendergrass supposed to avoid Oz Manning when he kept popping up in every aspect of her life?
Trying not to think of Madison Memorial's hotshot new heart surgeon, she inserted a catheter into her patient Latham Duke's vein. Attaching the intravenous equipment, she taped the tubing to secure the line to the banker's arm.
"You're really good at that." Mr Duke relaxed his clenched fingers now that the IV line was in place. "The last nurse who stuck me about killed me."
Blair smiled. She enjoyed what she did and took great pride in causing as little pain as possible to her patients.
"Let's hope Dr Manning doesn't finish the job that other nurse started." Wrinkles furrowed his pale forehead at the thought of his arteriogram.
Since Oz's arrival, every female in LA---Lower Alabama, that was---had gone gaga over him.
Except Blair. She consciously avoided the six-foot-two heart surgeon who reputedly broke as many hearts as he healed.
She'd written Oz off as a hopeless playboy years ago when he'd visited his mentor Dr Ted Talbot. Sure, he could charm the habit off a nun with one crook of his little finger, but Blair had learned her lesson with regard to full-of-themselves men.
Been there, done that, had the scars to prove it.
Still, for what Oz was doing for Dr Talbot, she'd tolerate his insufferable womanizing ways.
Her heart squeezed. For nearly half a year Dr Talbot had been battling the metastatic cancer that had started in his colon and aggressively spread to his pancreas, liver and hip.
"I know an arteriogram is a common procedure, but frankly having something rammed through my groin and up into my heart terrifies me," Mr Duke continued on a breathy note. "Especially by a new doctor."
Blair patted his hand. "Although he's new to Madison Memorial, Dr Manning isn't a new doctor. He previously worked at one of the country's leading cardiology clinics."
"So I hear."
"Then you heard right." Blair administered the medication that wouldn't completely put Mr Duke to sleep, but would make him less aware of what was happening. "With Dr Talbot on medical leave---" oh, how her heart broke at his rapidly declining health "---Dr Manning is the most highly skilled surgeon on staff. There's no one I'd trust more with my heart," she assured him honestly. Oz's professional résumé was impressive.
"Isn't that sweet," a cocky male voice praised from a few feet away. "I never knew that's how you felt."
She silently cursed Oz's timing.
Meeting his blue gaze, she took in his pleased grin. Dimples dug into his cheeks, adding a boy-next-door charm to his good looks. Blair rolled her eyes. He'd be much easier to deal with if he was cross-eyed, bald, paunchy and dim-witted.
None of those things, Oz's grin widened.
Heat infused her bloodstream as surely as it would Mr Duke's when Oz pushed the dye. Blair had great empathy with the hot, flushing sensation described as the number-one side effect of the dye used to illuminate the vessels.
"Good morning, Latham." Oz's gaze skimmed over the monitors hooked to his patient, who was already visibly relaxing from the medication. "Is Blair treating you well?"
"The best." The man nodded toward his IV. "As gentle as she put this thing in, she's officially my all-time favorite nurse."
"I hear that a lot." Oz flashed a teasing look her way. "Blair being a favorite, especially from men."
Puh-leeze.
Her short, dark hair and plain green eyes made her average in looks. Childbirth had left her hips too wide, her breasts too big, and her body perpetually ten pounds heavier than she wanted it to be.
She hadn't been any man's favorite in a long time.
If ever.
"Beautiful and good at her job, too," Mr Duke mused. "She's a keeper."
"Definitely." Oz raked his gaze over her. When their eyes met something dark flashed in the blue depths.
Blair stepped back, shaken by the intensity of his stare. He loved to tease her, seemed to live to do so, which was why she avoided him as much as possible. But for that brief moment he'd looked serious. Almost dangerous.
"Good thing I'm a catch-and-release kind of guy or I'd be in trouble."
Relieved at his normal cocky tone, she let out the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.
Without another glance her way, Oz turned back to the equipment. He warned his patient about the ensuing hot flush and possibly the sensation that he'd need to urinate. When finished, he double-checked Mr Duke's identification bracelet. Satisfied he had the right patient and wasn't missing any allergies, Oz administered the dye.
"Nice." He watched the image on the screen and closely observed his patient's reaction to the medication.
"Is she single?"
Blair blinked. Had Mr Duke really just asked that?
"Yeah---" a tiny tic twitched at Oz's jaw "---but I thought you were married?"
"My son just moved back to Madison. He graduated from business school in December. Yale," the man added proudly. "A real bright boy. Handsome, like his father." He chuckled. "I'd love for him to meet a nice local girl---" he gave Blair a meaningful look, his gaze going to her gloved left hand "---and settle down and get married."
Settle down? Marriage? Ick. Blair almost broke out in hives at the thought. She didn't have time to date, much less get married. She didn't even want to. Her life was full with her five-year-old daughter, Addy, her younger sister, Reesee, and Dr Talbot. There wasn't room for catering to a man's ego and she didn't want to make room. She liked her life as it was---with the exception of Dr Talbot's illness and Oz's annoying presence.
"You should tell your son about the fund-raiser we're doing to help with Dr Talbot's medical expenses," she suggested, tired of being talked about as if she weren't there. "We're hosting a silent auction for donated items, but the main attraction is a bachelor/ bachelorette auction."
"That dye wasn't as bad as I feared," Mr Duke admitted. "Bachelor/bachelorette auction?"
"Actually, I should talk to your son about volunteering to be auctioned. A handsome businessman would raise a lot for a good cause."
"You're still short on bachelors?" A frown creased Oz's forehead, but he didn't glance away from his patient. "Even after I contacted Will Majors about volunteering? Stephanie told me he called."
Although Oz had offered to help in any way he could, surprisingly, he had refused to be auctioned. Not when Blair asked, nor when her co-coordinator Stephanie had asked. Blair still couldn't believe Oz hadn't wanted to be auctioned. She'd have thought women fighting over him publicly would be right up his alley.
"We still need two more bachelors to even the numbers out."
"Two bachelors," he mused.
Oz might be talking with her, but his real focus was on what he was doing. He guided the instrument into the patient's femoral artery and up into the heart.
Even during routine procedures, Blair breathed a little shallowly until her patient was resting comfortably post-procedure. She'd never developed the tough skin needed to see the person lying there as just another patient.
Perhaps because her mother had died during a hysterectomy for uterine fibroids when Blair had only been nineteen.
"Ah, problem number one is right there," Oz murmured, causing Blair's and Mr Duke's heavy-lidded gaze to shift to the computerized screen. "There's a tiny blockage of the right bundle branch. Nothing a stent won't fix."
Mr Duke had closed his eyes, probably in sleep. Blair kept a vigilant eye on the man's vitals. Oz positioned the device to where the artery was significantly narrowed, impeding blood flow and cutting off oxygen to Mr Duke's heart tissue. With single-minded purpose Oz opened the blockage.
The blood flow immediately resumed through the artery.
Oz had a magic touch when it came to healing hearts.
Blair had learned so much from working with Dr Talbot, but she'd told Mr Duke the truth. There wasn't a cardiologist she'd trust more than Oz Manning. He was that good, that talented.
Which seemed at odds with the man who was always teasing, always flirting, always out with one woman after another. Only this visit, with caring for Dr Talbot his primary focus, Oz had curtailed his revolving-door dating.
Before finishing Mr Duke's arteriogram, Oz placed two more stents in diseased arteries. While he worked he explained what he was doing to his patient. He made conversation with the heavy-lidded man as if they were watching a football game on television rather than Oz's life-saving measures inside the man's heart.
Although a big teddy bear outside of work, Dr Talbot was a grizzly during procedures. Blair had grown accustomed to his intensity, to his drill sergeant ways in the cardiac cath lab. Oz's easygoing attitude disoriented her to say the least.
The man disoriented her, period.
Even now, she could smell his musky scent, was keenly aware of his broad shoulders, thick chest and narrow hips. Not to mention that her fingers perpetually itched to trace over the cleft in his strong chin.
Okay, so Oz was attractive. Big deal. She wasn't blind. No matter how attractive he was, she'd never allow a man like him to get close. Never again. Some lessons were learned the hard way and left lasting impressions an entire lifetime wouldn't erase.
Blair swallowed, forcing her mind back to her patient and not his sexy surgeon.
"Unfortunately, I can't repair your mitral valve through the catheter," Oz said, although he'd explain again when his patient was free of the twilight medication. "The damage to the valve is too extensive to seal the leak as we'd hoped."
Although having taken leave from his clinical position in Minnesota, Oz continued researching a valve repair device that didn't require opening the patient's chest. He opted to use the innovative procedure at Madison when patients met the study criteria.
When Oz decreased the anesthetic medication and removed the catheter from the man's femoral artery, Blair placed a weighted device on her patient's groin, keeping pressure on the bleed.
Mr Duke's face had grown pale, but not from blood loss. "Does this mean I have to have open-heart surgery?"
"There isn't a way around it." Oz sat straighter on the wheeled stool. "If you're agreeable, we'll get you on the schedule for tomorrow. Regardless, I recommend doing the surgery within the next few weeks."
The medicine starting to wear off, Mr Duke shook his head. "I can't have surgery that soon. I didn't come prepared to stay. I'll be out of commission for weeks. There are things at home, at the bank, that need doing before I'm incapacitated that long."
"Who's going to do those things when you die from heart disease? Who's going to take care of your family?"
Blair couldn't drag her gaze away from Oz. His lips had thinned. The cleft in his chin seemed deeper, craggier. But his eyes were what held her mesmerized.
In that moment, she glimpsed an unguarded vulnerability she hadn't known he possessed. Somewhere along the line he'd known heartache.
Blair didn't like the quiver of empathy that look elicited within her. Not one bit.
She busied herself checking things she'd already checked.
"Will that happen if I choose not to have surgery?" Mr Duke swallowed hard. "Won't the stents you put in today be enough to keep me going? I wasn't feeling that bad to begin with, just got out of breath easily."
"Maybe nothing will happen if you don't have the surgery." His expression having returned to normal, Oz shrugged. "But odds are you'll go into heart failure or develop another serious heart condition such as atrial fibrillation. The stents have opened up the blocked arteries, but won't correct your leaky valve."
Mr Duke grimaced. "What does this valve do? What does it matter if a little blood leaks?"
"The mitral valve is the valve between your heart's left atrium and left ventricle. When the valve doesn't seal properly, some of the blood that is supposed to be pumped from the ventricle into your aorta washes back into the atrium. That means less blood goes into the aorta. To compensate for the decreased blood available to the body, the left ventricle enlarges so it can work harder to pump more blood."
Mr Duke digested Oz's explanation, taking a moment before he responded. "You told me last week when you did the ultrasound that my heart was enlarged. Is this valve why?"
"The heart is a muscle. If it's working harder, it's going to get bigger, just as your bicep enlarges when you work out."
"If I don't do the surgery, my heart will keep getting worse?"
"Absolutely," Oz said without hesitation. "The longer you wait, the more damaged the valve is going to be, the more extensive the surgery will be. Currently, I can surgically repair the valve, which means you keep your own valve. If we wait, the valve will be so damaged you'll have to have a mechanical replacement."
"A mechanical valve?" The man's brows drew together. "Why mechanical?"
"Because a tissue valve replacement would wear out. You'd be back in surgery in ten to fifteen years. With a mechanical, you'll have to take a blood thinner, but the valve would last your lifetime. Still, the best option is to fix your own valve before you reach that point."
"I need some time." Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, the man sighed. "I don't have to decide this moment?"
"No." Oz shook his head. "I'll be by to see you later this morning. Right now, you do everything your lovely nurse tells you to do and you'll be fine."
Blair ignored his silver-tongued compliment.
"Thank you, Dr Manning. I'll think about what you've said and discuss it with my family." Mr Duke held out his hand toward Oz.
"Blair will provide you with some literature and a video on mitral valve repair." Removing his rubber gloves, Oz shook Mr Duke's hand. "If you or your family have any additional questions or want more information, feel free to ask. Blair's part of my cardiac team and knows about as much as I do about the repair procedure."
She doubted that.
Still a little hazy, Mr Duke nodded.
"Be sure to tell your son about the fund-raiser." Oz sent a knowing look toward Blair. "If he's lucky, Blair will bid on him."
Blair gave Oz a cool glare as she continued preparing her patient for transport to the recovery room. No wonder she didn't like him. He was a total flirt, prone to insincere flattery, a womanizer, and an incessant tease.
"Pay him no attention," she advised her patient. "I think he's sniffed anesthesia one time too many."
Oz laughed, deep and throaty, and Blair was suddenly overtaken by an acute attack of loneliness. Loneliness at just how long it had been since she'd spent any real time with a man, just laughing and enjoying together time.
What was she thinking?
She didn't need or want someone like Oz making her question her life. He made her uncomfortable, made her heart pound as if she'd run a marathon in record time, made her lungs feel as if they couldn't get enough air.
All of which just made her like him that much less.
After she had Mr Duke resting in Recovery, she headed back to the cardiac nurses' station.
The devil leaned against the counter, looking sexy as sin and flirting with two nurses. No surprise there.
Kanesha Biles was happily married, but the nursing director was far from immune to Dr Oz. Her dark eyes glittering with delight, she slapped at Oz's arm and giggled at whatever he'd said. Becky stared at him in pure, unadulterated adoration, as if she were ready to sell her soul for a night of his attention.
"Oz Manning, you are bad," Kanesha scolded, shaking her head with an indulgent look on her face.
"You know what they say about bad boys, don't you?" Oz asked, his attention shifting to Blair.
She picked up a hospital memo, careful not to look into eyes so blue they'd been known to stupefy even the most staid of feminine souls. Eyes so blue they reminded her of another man who'd once hurt her by his careless use of the charms he wielded like a sword slaying a woman's defenses. Her defenses.
Just like Chris, Oz knew the effect he had on the opposite sex. He thrived on female attention.
"What do they say, Dr Manning?" Becky urged when Oz let his words hang tantalizingly in the air. "Tell us, please."
Unable to stop herself, Blair glanced toward Oz. He stared straight at her as if he could look into her soul and know every thought, every desire she'd ever had.
"Deep down, bad boys are really, really good."
His silky voice dripped with sin.
With suggestion.
With pure seduction. As if he was speaking directly to Blair and no one else in the world existed.
With...oh, Lord, Blair's lungs threatened to burst. Her knees buckled. She grabbed hold of the nurses' station desk to steady herself.
She didn't like him. She knew he was a playboy who broke women's hearts.
No matter how he wielded power over all things female, Oz was too much like Addy's father for Blair to ever lower the shield protecting her heart.
Still, thank God she wasn't hooked to one of the monitoring devices.
Protective shield or not, all sorts of alarms would be blaring at the traitorous pounding against her rib cage.
READY for a break, Oz made his way through the lunch line. Carrying his loaded tray, he grabbed a bottled water, then gave the hospital cafeteria checkout cashier his badge to scan.
"How's it going today, Gran?" he asked. The blue-haired lady's real name was Wanda, but Oz had teasingly called her "Gran." The nickname had stuck.
Gran's wrinkled cheeks flushed to a rosy shade of pink. "Not bad. My arthritis is flared a little, but when's it not?"
"You should let Will give you something for that."
Will Majors was Gran's primary care physician and a friend of Oz's. The two had hit it off during Oz's visits and usually spent time windsurfing or sailing. These days both men had other priorities, Dr Talbot being Oz's number one.
"He's tried." The woman chuckled. "But I'm not going to take medications unless I reach the point where I have to. If I don't ease up in a day or two, though, I'll schedule an appointment with Dr Will."
"Take care, Gran, and keep making men pay you to stand there looking beautiful."
Beaming, Gran cackled with pleasure.
It was the same conversation they had most days. Oz purposely went through Gran's checkout line just so he could put a smile on the woman's face.
Wanting to be alone to revive his sleep-deprived body, Oz scanned the cafeteria to find an empty table. He spotted several of his cardiac unit colleagues at a close-by table.
In particular, he saw Blair.
Pushing a short strand of her wispy dark hair behind her ear, she laughed at something the cardiac nurse manager she sat with said.
Blair.
He wasn't sure what it was about her that made him seek her out, but he always did. Perhaps he liked to see the pretty flush that rose in her cheeks when their eyes met. Or how she quickly looked away, her breath catching.
He liked Blair. Had from the first moment they'd met. She was a beautiful woman, inside and out. Oz had wanted her from the moment Dr T introduced them. But an affair was all he'd ever want from any woman. All he'd ever allow any woman to expect from him. He suspected, though, that Blair was the kind of woman who'd expect loads more than physical pleasure.
Which was why Oz might look, might tease Blair, but he'd never go further.
Based upon the way her feet kicked into high gear anytime he was near, she'd likely tell him where he could go if he ever did reveal how attracted to her he really was, anyway.
Maybe it was just as well.
With Dr T's failing health, the last thing Oz needed was to become distracted by a woman. His friend needed Oz to stay focused on the cardiac center and running Dr T's day-to-day life.
Passing by their table, Oz acknowledged the three nurses. "Hey, Kanesha, Blair, Becky."
"Dr Manning." Kanesha flashed her brilliant white teeth in a big smile. "Join us?"
"Please do." Becky scooted her tray over. "You can sit by me."
Not so long ago, Oz would have sat next to the blonde nurse, would likely have taken up the constant offer in her eyes. That was before Dr T had gotten sick.
Oz had decided to make his friend's life as good as possible under the circumstances. Currently, Oz spent all his spare time trying to make that happen, right down to moving hundreds of miles away from his home so he could be with Dr T and work in his place so the man could keep his health insurance. Oz didn't have time for dalliances with pretty nurses, particularly not ones who worked in the cardiac center.
He glanced longingly toward the empty table in the corner of the cafeteria.
"Come on, Dr Manning, we promise not to bite." Kanesha patted the empty chair next to her. "We're not taking no for an answer."
Reluctantly, he set his tray next to Kanesha's, across from Blair and Becky.
Kanesha took a sip of her iced tea. "How's Dr Talbot this morning?"
Why hadn't he told a corny joke or something before someone could bring up the subject of Dr T? Wherever he went, someone inevitably asked about Dr T. Wasn't that why he'd wanted to be alone? To not have to dwell on the fact he was losing the only person who'd ever really cared about him? That the man he loved was dying?
The older heart surgeon had been Oz's saving grace, the one constant good in his life. He had been more than a professor, more than a mentor. He'd been like a father. Much more so than the bastard who'd biologically fathered him.
Oz twisted the lid off his bottled water. "I spoke with Dr T's nurse after they got home from his chemotherapy. The treatment went okay, but he's had a rough day."
He wished his friend would let him go with him to the appointments. Dr T wouldn't. Not Oz. Not Blair. Not even Stephanie, Dr T's lady friend.
Blair glanced up, but quickly returned her attention to her food. She'd grown quiet the moment he'd stepped up to the table. Although he'd never figured out why, she didn't much care for him. Her earlier praise to Mr Duke had caught him off guard, had swelled his chest with pride and made him feel a little light-headed.
Praise from Blair didn't come easily. He'd found himself wanting more, to have her look at him with admiration, with attraction matching what he felt for her.
Just as well that Mr Duke's comment about Blair being a "keeper" had reminded him that he and Blair were nothing alike.
"I talked with him this morning before they left. He sounded so down." Blair still didn't directly look at him. "Did something happen?"
"He couldn't sleep. I sat up with him most of the night."
With a long, intricately designed fingernail, Kanesha gently scratched the base of a tightly wound hair braid. "I thought he had a private duty nurse around the clock?"
Although Dr T had complained about the cost, Oz had hired the private duty nurse, paying for the care himself when Dr T's insurance had refused. Normally a nurse stayed around the clock from Sunday night through Friday evening. Usually Oz covered the weekends, with Blair and Stephanie's help.
"Angie had something come up with her grandson around ten and had to leave."
Unfortunately after Angie had left, Dr T had awakened in pain and dry-heaving. He hadn't been able to return to sleep and had wanted company. Despite the long day Oz had put in at the hospital, he'd sat up with him.
"She'll be staying tonight, though?" Blair's concerned eyes met his.
Oz's breath hitched in his chest. Damn, but she had beautiful eyes. The most vivid green he'd ever seen. Her makeup-free face and natural beauty quite often had him staring at her, trying to figure out what it was that made him wish she were different, that she didn't expect the things from a man he knew she'd expect.
Not to mention Blair's daughter. Although he adored the little girl, Addy was enough reason to leave Blair alone.
He never became involved with women who had children. Never. Too complicated.
He nodded. "As far as I know, Angie will be there. She was back this morning prior to Stephanie arriving with Dr T's breakfast."
"I can sit with him tonight so you can get some sleep."
As if he'd sleep, knowing Blair was under the same roof.
"Me, too." Becky gave Oz a flirty smile.
"Thanks, but sitting up with Dr T isn't a problem." Oz cherished the time with his friend. How many more opportunities would he have to chat with him? How long before he'd never again look into his friend's caring eyes?
Seeing the once vibrant man so feeble was wearing on Oz, but he'd never admit that to anyone.
Especially not Blair.
"No, but you can only sit up so many nights in a row before doing so takes its toll on you," Blair pointed out, staring at him closely.
Her concern pricked a sore spot deep in Oz's chest. Other than Dr T, had anyone ever expressed concern over his well-being? His mother on occasion when he'd been young, but she'd sent him away to private school about the time he hit puberty. He'd never returned home.
"You look tired. Dr Talbot needs you taking care of his patients, not getting sick." Blair's reprimand put him in his place. "If you get rundown and can't work, he'll worry about the cardiac unit. He doesn't need that right now."
He should have known her real concern was for Dr T, not him. She'd always shot him down at every opportunity during his visits. Or avoided him altogether. That wasn't so easy this time.
"If Angie has to take off, I'll call, Blair." He shot an apologetic look toward Becky. "Dr T is picky about who he'll let stay overnight, but you're welcome to visit him."
"Thanks." Becky didn't attempt to hide her disappointment.
Kanesha chuckled.
Blair toyed with her fork, dragging the tines across her mashed potatoes.
"What would you do about Addy?" He adored the imp who, with the exception of her pale blond hair, looked just like her mother. Only Addy's green eyes lit with delight when she looked at Oz.
"I'll bring her with me. She thinks the mermaid room is hers anyway." Although her plate was still half-full, Blair pushed back from the table, smiled at no one in particular. "I'm heading back to the cardiology unit to get our first patient for the afternoon started. I'll see you all there." She paused, glanced toward Oz. "Seriously, call if Dr Talbot needs me. I'm working with Stephanie on the fund-raiser tonight, but I can reschedule if needed."
Actually, unless Dr T's nurse got called away, Oz was helping Stephanie tonight, too, but he didn't tell Blair that, just nodded.
Becky began chatting, but Oz only half listened. Taking a big bite of his lunch, he watched the curvy brunette crossing the cafeteria.
Something besides hunger stirred deep in Oz's gut. Something he didn't know how to label or deal with, except that the only time he felt the stirring was when Blair Pendergrass was involved.
When Becky broke for breath, Kanesha, who'd observed their conversation, gave Oz a speculative look. "Dr Talbot is lucky to have you and Blair to take care of him."
"Luck has nothing to do with it." Oz forced his gaze away from where Blair emptied her tray. "Dr T earned my loyalty. There's nothing I wouldn't do for him."
"No, I imagine there isn't." Kanesha's gaze bounced to where Blair had stopped to say hi to friends at another table. "Blair's the same way. She had a fit when the hospital began searching for a replacement, threatening to stop Dr T's medical insurance. If you hadn't stepped in to take his place until he could return, she would have battled the entire board to keep his job open." Kanesha sighed, her dark face somber. "Even if he beats his cancer, and I pray he does, he'll never work in surgery again. We all know that, but are grateful for what you're doing."
Oz stuffed his mouth full of green peas. He wasn't ready to discuss the fact that he'd never walk into a surgery suite and see his friend issuing orders like a mighty general and everyone hopping to do his bidding.
What was Oz doing at the Madison Heart Association? Blair seethed. Wasn't having to see him at the hospital more than enough torture?
She punched in a phone number from the list of businesses she and Stephanie had put together to contact.
After swinging by her house to pick up Addy from the neighbor who watched her each afternoon, Blair had gone straight to Madison Heart Association's small office.
Ear to phone, Blair glanced around the small room that housed three desks and was lined with dozens of bookshelves loaded with educational material about heart disease. Taking a break from her Oz worshipping, Addy sat at a desk, playing a video game where she cared for her favorite virtual pet, a chocolate lab she'd named Boo-boo-too in honor of Dr Talbot's dog. Wearing jeans and a Mayo Clinic T-shirt, Oz stood near the largest desk, one cluttered with papers, books, mail and a plastic replica of a human heart.
The man did wonders for a pair of jeans.
"You okay over there?" Stephanie called. In her fifties, the vibrant woman was the director of the Madison Heart Association.
Blair and the woman she co-coordinated the fund-raiser with had become friends long ago. Over the years, they'd spent a lot of time together at Dr Talbot's. She often wondered if there was something between the couple. Both denied that there was. Stephanie's denial had been a bit misty-eyed, though.
"Fine."
Just fine, if only she could keep her mind off Oz. What was wrong with her? Usually she didn't have this much trouble focusing on her work rather than on the man who annoyed her so much. But the more she was forced to spend time with him, the more she watched him care for Dr T, interact with Addy, the more Oz got inside her head.
"Good." Stephanie smiled and returned her attention to the paper Oz held, outlining their plans for the fund-raiser in just a few short weeks. Stephanie had handed over the catering of the event to Oz. Blair only hoped they didn't live to regret the decision.
Like all females, Stephanie adored Oz and didn't bother to mask her adoration. The older woman giggled like a schoolgirl at something he'd said.
As if sensing her attention, he glanced up, caught Blair ogling him. He pinned her beneath his blue stare, defied her to look away.
Her heart pitter-pattered like a roller coaster making its highest climb, only to plunge to wicked depths and sharp turns. Her careening pulse was just from the embarrassment of being caught eyeballing him. Surely. The effect he had on her irritated her all the same.
"Hello? Hello, is anyone there?" a voice asked from the phone receiver Blair gripped.
She'd forgotten all about her call. How many hellos had she missed?
She cleared her throat and gave her spiel about the fund-raiser, all too aware Oz's gaze remained on her. Her words came out jumbled, but to her relief, the florist on the other end of the phone pledged a hundred dollars and floral arrangements for the event.
The unexpected generosity to her garbled request pulled her back to the job she'd come to the charity to perform rather than on the man who always seemed to steal the show. She wrote down the information, then hung up the phone, a smile on her face.
"I take it you got a yes?" Oz asked.
She nodded, aware that Stephanie's attention was now focused on her, too.
"Great job." The older woman's dark gaze darted back and forth between Blair and Oz. "I was afraid you'd insist on addressing envelopes and stuffing them with the mailer."
Blair hated making cold calls, but someone had to do them. Stephanie had taken on a great deal of the work, but Blair wanted to do her part. Dr Talbot was worth making thousands of calls.
"As exciting as addressing and stuffing envelopes sounds---" Blair smiled "---I'll stick with calls. I know how important it is that we get the donations lined up as quickly as possible." She glanced at the stapled pages of names and businesses to be called. "Although I don't think I'll make it through the rest of these tonight."
"Do what you can, but no worries. You've already amazed me at how many local businesses have donated."
"I can stuff 'lopes, Mommy," Addy piped up from where she sat, her big green eyes eager.
"Addy, honey, Mommy needs you to be close in case I need your help." Addy was a darling and usually well-behaved, but like any child, she had her moments.
"But I'm a really good helper," her daughter insisted, wearing a pleading expression.
"Yes, you're a good helper," she began, but was interrupted by Oz going to Addy and taking her small fingers into his much larger ones. His strong fingers clasped Addy's fragile ones, twisting Blair's heart with a reminder of the one thing she could never give her daughter---a father's love and affection.
Appearing totally serious, Oz thoroughly examined her daughter's hands.
"I don't know, Stephanie," he contemplated, scratching his head. "What do you think? Do these look like good helper hands to you? Kind of look like pipsqueak hands to me."
Knowing a sucker when she saw him, Addy batted her lashes at Oz. From the moment they'd met, Addy and Oz had hit it off. Probably because he acted as much like a kid as Addy did and he showered her with his attention. Addy thought Oz walked on water.
But seriously, how could Blair expect a five-year-old to resist his charms when grown women couldn't?
"Mommy, tell Dr Oz what a good helper I am." Addy's bright eyes shifted to Blair, then to Oz. No puppy had ever given a more appealing look than the one her daughter bestowed upon her quarry.
Despite her melancholy, Blair bit back a smile. Oz had met his match in Addison Pendergrass.
"You're the best helper, Addy." Blair tried to be diplomatic in case Stephanie preferred Addy to stay near Blair. "But I'm sure the lady stuffing envelopes has things under control."
"Actually, she could use help." Stephanie earned a pleased look from Addy. "If that's okay with you, Blair?"
Blair silently mouthed thank you. "As long as she's not in the way."
"She won't be," Stephanie assured, smiling her acknowledgement. "Oz will help keep an eye on her."
Blair's gaze shifted to Oz.
His brow arched.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome." His gaze lingered, searched hers, and something flickered in his eyes, unreadable and disturbing. Surprisingly, for once, he looked away first. Turning to Addy, he poured on his own lethal brand of charm, bowing reverently.
"So, Pipsqueak, looks like you're in charge." He straightened, grinned, held out his hands palm-up. "I'm a good helper, too. Can I be your envelope stuffer helper?"
Taking his outstretched hands, examining them as closely as he'd done hers, Addy pretended to consider.
"Hey!" Oz teased when she dragged out the examination longer than he deemed necessary. "It's not like I have cooties."
"You can be my helper." Addy giggled, slapping her thigh at her joke. "Since you don't have cooties."
"No cooties here," he promised. "Let me finish going over this form with Stephanie while you save your game, okay? Then we'll show the world how envelopes are supposed to be addressed and stuffed."
Two hours later, Blair had procured donations of several more items for the event. She reached up to massage her contracted neck muscles. Man, it had been a long day.
"Tired?"
Startled, she glanced toward where Oz stood in the doorway, watching her. Her fingers paused mid-knead.
"A little." How long had he been standing there? "I sat too long without stretching."
She rotated her stiff neck.
When Oz moved behind her, she knew what he was going to do even before she felt his fingers. She wanted to stop him, opened her mouth to do so, but her breath caught, held, burned in her chest.
He touched her tense flesh.
Shards of electricity pulsated through her, lighting fires where he touched and radiating out to the tips of her fingers and toes.
Blair's insides turned to goop.
This was bad. Very bad.
But oh, my, did bad feel good.
Way too good to find her voice and make him stop.
It was just a quick therapeutic massage. Nothing more.
For therapy. That was all. Really.
Blair's hands dropped to her lap.
He stroked her tight muscles with a feathery touch. His fingers traced across the curve of her neck. So lightly she could almost think she imagined the burn of his fingertips through the short strands of her hair.
But she wasn't imagining his touch.
Or her reaction.
Every nerve cell zinged to life, jumped, flipped inside out.
Sighing, she closed her eyes.
His pressure increased.
Standing behind her chair, he worked on her neck and upper shoulders, dispensing every knot, leaving sensitized chaos in his wake.
Every breath echoed across endless time.
Every heartbeat thundered through endless space.
His fingers were magic that massaged away every reason she should tell him to stop, magic that made her forget she didn't like him.
His hand moved around her neck, stroked over her shoulders, her clavicle.
"Mmm." She angled to give him easier access, the back of her head brushing against his flat abdomen.
Oh, my.
His fingers skimmed back and forth, slow, teasing, caressing the column of her throat, her chin. He gently traced her mouth. Her tongue darted out to moisten her suddenly dry lips. His fingers paused.
Blair's breath caught and held.
Butterflies danced in her belly, sending up a fluttery rainbow of sensations that brought her black-and-white world into Technicolor. Sensations that made her acutely aware that she was a woman.
It had been a long time since she'd felt that awareness.
She turned, looked up at him, saw the desire reflected in his eyes.
He reached for her, taking her hand, pulling her to her feet, their bodies so close they practically touched.
In a daze, Blair breathed in his spicy scent, felt his palm cup her face, felt his body heat lure her closer, for her to close the small gap between them.
Although she knew she had to stop him, that she couldn't kiss Oz when she had no room for him in her life, when he'd only end up hurting her if she let her guard down, she touched his face, running her finger over the cleft in his chin, fighting the strongest desire to do the same with her lips. She loved that indentation, that impression on his flawless face.
"Blair, I---"
"How's it going, you two?" Stephanie stepped into the room.
Blair jerked away from Oz.
Oh, God.
What had she been doing? Thinking?
Addy could have walked in, seen.
Mortified, Blair couldn't look at Stephanie. How could she when she'd just been caught with Oz?
A man she didn't even like!
Dear, sweet heavens. She should have stopped him the moment he'd touched her.
She should have stopped him before her body throbbed from his touch, before she wanted to find out what all the hype about Oz Manning was really about.
A quickie massage didn't mean anything to Oz. but darn it, she didn't do this. Physical acts meant something to her, meant a lot to her, but...she should have stopped him. She wasn't one of his groupies. How could she have behaved no better than any of his other conquests? Hadn't she learned anything from her experience with Chris?
"Oh, sorry," Stephanie began, a little red-faced and flustered, too.
No way could she not suspect what Blair and Oz had been about to do.
They'd almost kissed. Oh...oh...oh, darn!
This was insane.
Insane. That was exactly right. Temporary insanity.
Because that was what Oz had done. Driven her insane with his playboy ways and his tenderness toward Dr Talbot and Addy. How could he be such a cad with women and yet so appealing with her daughter and dearest friend? With his patients?
"Did you need something?" Oz's eyes flashed with annoyance and perhaps relief, too, at Stephanie's interruption.
"What's going on?" Her gaze dropped to where his hand burned into Blair's lower back like a hot poker. Her thin cotton shirt was no barrier to the sear of his touch.
Needing to put as much space between them as she could, Blair stepped forward.
Oz's hand fell to his side. "Blair had a crick in her neck."
Stephanie's brow quirked. "And you offered to help out?"
"You know me. Always willing to lend a helping hand."
Blair refused to look at him. She didn't want to know if he wore a serious expression or if he'd waggled those thick blond brows, making light of the situation. She only wanted to rush to the bathroom and splash cold water on her face in the hope of waking herself and finding this was all a nightmare.
Seeming to have recovered from her initial shock, Stephanie smirked at Oz's comment. "Especially when a female is involved?"
"Blair is certainly female."
Blair thought she might die of mortification.
At least then she wouldn't have to face the reality that she'd let Oz Manning touch her. Not just touch her, but touch her.
He might have started out just massaging her neck, but when Stephanie had walked in he'd been about to kiss her.
The worst part was that she'd let him touch her. As much as she wanted to believe she would have stopped him, she wasn't so sure that she would have. If Stephanie hadn't interrupted, she'd be swapping spit with the worst playboy she'd ever encountered.
With Addy in the next room.
Had she completely lost her mind?
"I came to tell you Dorothy is leaving in just a few. Addy is helping her finish the last of the mailers."
Drawing upon all her strength, Blair kept her shoulders high and walked around the desk. She checked her watch. Almost eight on a school night.
"I need to go, too, but I'm off duty on Saturday. Would that be an okay time for Addy and I to come back?"
Stephanie's curious eyes lit with gratitude. "That would be wonderful. Addy was a great help with the envelopes."
"I'll take the list home with me and finish making the calls while I'm at lunch tomorrow or Friday. Perhaps even at Dr Talbot's tomorrow night if he naps. Maybe I can get the rest marked off between now and Saturday."
"I'll be here on Saturday, too. I'll bring Dr T with me if he's up to it. He needs to get out of the house." Oz moved behind Blair, not so close that he was touching her, but enough that his scent enveloped her, taking her back to the moments before Stephanie had walked into the room. No. No. No. She did not wish she'd kissed Oz.
"We'll go over what we have covered for the fund-raiser," Oz continued, oblivious to the effect he was having on Blair. "Hire out what we don't, grab some lunch, then spend the rest of the day with Dr T."
"Thanks." Stephanie smiled knowingly at them, a pleased smile, making Blair even more self-conscious. "I'll just go tell Dorothy goodbye and leave you two alone so Oz can go back to...um...helping."
Great.
The moment Stephanie was gone, Blair spun toward Oz. "What do you think you're doing?"
"Don't go all defensive," he warned, giving her a frustrated look that said perhaps he wasn't as calm as he'd pretended. That maybe he had been aware of the effect his nearness was having on her and that he'd been just as affected.
"I'm not being defensive," she spat back, determined not to go soft on him again.
"Yes, you are. I understand." The blasted man stroked his knuckles across her face. "We should go somewhere and talk."
Talk? Yeah, right. Oz wasn't known for talking to women.
Glaring at him, Blair pulled back. He couldn't touch her. She couldn't let him. He was dangerous. Too dangerous.
Just look what had happened the last time she'd let a man get close to her. She'd ended up pregnant and alone, mourning the death of a man she hadn't known had been married to someone else, much less that he'd had other "girlfriends."
Now, she had a great life that she'd worked long and hard to forge. She wouldn't let a man destroy her a second time.
"We have nothing to say to each other."
"We need to talk about what just happened." Was he staring at her lips?
Dear Lord, he was.
She swallowed. Hard.
She'd known he hadn't really wanted to talk. Did he think she was a fool? That he could just almost kiss her and she'd fall at his feet?
"Nothing happened, Dr Manning," she snapped coolly. "Even if Stephanie hadn't walked in, nothing would have happened. I don't like you, and I certainly didn't want you to touch me or kiss me." The words ground out between gritted teeth. "I prefer for you to stay away from me and my daughter. Got it?"
Oz had wanted to kiss Blair more than he recalled ever wanting to kiss any woman.
He'd wanted to kiss her so much he ached with need from the ends of his hair to the tips of his toes and all in between.
He'd especially ached in between.
Now he just wanted to strangle her lying throat.
He wasn't some inexperienced schoolboy. He knew when a woman wanted him. Blair had wanted him to kiss her. Perhaps not as much as he'd wanted to kiss her, but she'd wanted his mouth on hers.
But she was right. He shouldn't have touched her.
Hadn't he always known not to touch Blair? That touching her wouldn't be nearly enough? Hadn't he subconsciously appreciated that she avoided him because it made doing the right thing easier? Hadn't he always made a point to keep a physical distance between them?
Why had he crossed that line tonight?
She was a complicated woman with a child. She was white picket fences and promises of forever. He was his father's son and liked women. Lots of women. He didn't do commitment, didn't do long-term relationships.
Yet, even now, with her staring at him as if he were the devil incarnate, he wanted to pull her to him and assure her that their touching had felt more right than anything he'd experienced in a long time. Maybe ever.
Which made no sense.
Likely the strain of caring for Dr T, of seeing his friend suffer, was getting to him and explained his weakness with Blair.
"I need to get Addy." She turned, picked up her purse from where she'd set the leather bag after they'd arrived, then moved to where Addy had left her satchel of goodies to keep her entertained.
"I'll walk you to your car." He should just let her go. Should take a leaf from her book and pretend nothing had happened. Surely that would be for the best?
So, why couldn't he? Why did he want to kiss her until she admitted that she'd been as affected as he had?
Blair slid the pink hand-held video game player into Addy's bag. "There's no need."
"I'll walk you to your car," he repeated, irritated that she insisted upon pushing him away at every turn. "This neighborhood isn't the best at night."
This time Blair nodded without looking at him.
When she said it was time to go, Addy proudly pointed to the box filled with stuffed envelopes.
"See what I did, Mommy? Miss Stephanie says I'm a great 'lope stuffer and she hopes I'll come back." Addy looked at Stephanie for reassurance and the director nodded. "Can I, Mommy?"
"We'll see."
Oz wondered if he was the only one who noticed the break in Blair's voice, the tremble of her hand, the way she looked anywhere in the room but at him.
"Dr Oz said I was a good helper, too, didn't you, Dr Oz?" Addy bestowed him with the smile of an angel.
"I did, Pipsqueak." Giving her an indulgent look, Oz touched Addy's curly blond ponytail, letting a ringlet wrap around his finger.
Tight-lipped, Blair reached for Addy's hand, effectively moving the girl away from him. He let her, hating how his rib cage crushed his internal organs to the point he could barely breathe.
Blair had told him to stay away from her and Addy.
Hell, no! The thought rushed through his heart. But if that was what Blair wanted, he'd honor her wishes. At least as much as he could, given their circumstances.
"Thanks for letting her help." Blair hugged Stephanie. She smiled down at her daughter, who'd taken her Hello Kitty bag and slung it over her tiny shoulders. "Let's go check on Aunt Reesee to see if she got lots of studying done."
"Aunt Reesee?" Oz followed them out of the building. Dr T had mentioned Blair's younger sister lived with her and Addy. Despite the twice-a-year trips Oz made to the Gulf, he knew very little about Blair outside of what Dr T had volunteered. He'd purposely never asked questions.
"My nineteen-year-old sister." Blair kept her gaze locked on Addy, kept her tone even, probably for her daughter's sake, because he suspected she'd like to lash out at him. "She's in school at University of Alabama in Birmingham, but is taking several of her general study classes online to cut down on commuting and to help with Addy."
"Aunt Reesee is cool," Addy piped up, bouncing along beside them. "She lets me watch SpongeBob and drink soda pop after dark."
Blair's brow lifted. "Oh, really?"
Realizing her mistake, Addy faked a yawn and skipped ahead to Blair's mid-size four-door sedan. When Blair punched the remote entry, unlocking the door, Addy climbed in and began buckling herself into a child safety seat.
"Blair, about earlier," he began, speaking quietly in deference to the little girl who'd taken her video game out of her bag and chatted to her virtual pet.
Blair stepped back, not looking at him. "It was no big deal. Forget it happened."
Despite having just told himself the same thing, he didn't like Blair's quick denial. She was treating him as if he were a lecherous creep and her disdain annoyed him.
"Wasn't it?" he challenged.
Her teeth sank into her lower lip. "We both know you're an incurable flirt. What happened didn't mean a thing. Like I said, no big deal." She glanced toward where Addy played her game. "I need to go."
An incurable flirt? Blair's words stung. She made it sound as if he were diseased and condemned. Maybe he was. After all, wasn't that exactly how his mother had thought of his father? Like father, like son. Wasn't that what she always said?
"Fine," he bit out, "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Not if I see you first," she muttered under her breath.
She moved to Addy and checked to make sure the seat's safety catches were properly latched.
"Bye, Dr Oz." Addy waved, fighting back a yawn.
Oz's diseased and condemned heart squeezed. "Bye, Pipsqueak."
Blair closed the door, climbed into her car and drove away.
He raked his fingers through his hair, watching the taillights disappear into the night.
If he lived to a hundred, he wouldn't forget the feel of Blair's warm skin beneath his fingers, wouldn't forget the softness, the fullness, the way she'd stared into his eyes while he'd cupped her face.
Deep down he'd always wondered what touching Blair would feel like.
Now he knew and wished like hell he didn't.
"TELL me again that I'm imagining something between you and Dr Manning," Kanesha insisted the next morning. "Because I was at lunch yesterday and saw how you two looked at each other. The way you two always look at each other."
"You're imagining that there's something between Dr Manning and me." Blair didn't glance up at the cardiac unit's nursing director. Why should she when Kanesha might see guilt in her eyes?
"Yes, I am." Kanesha fanned her face. "And my thoughts are hot, hot, hot. You go, girl."
"There's nothing between us except a mutual love for Dr Talbot." Her friend was going to think what she wanted, regardless of anything Blair said. There wasn't anything between her and Oz. An almost kiss from the night before most certainly didn't count.
Kenesha glanced down the hallway. "Speaking of hot."
Don't look up. Don't look up.
Blair looked up.
And clashed gazes with Oz.
Her heart pounded against her rib cage. Why was he looking at her like that? That almost kiss hadn't meant anything.
"Uh-huh. It's all in my imagination," Kanesha snorted. "Nothing at all going on between the two of you. That's why he's looking at you like you're the sweetest lollipop he's ever seen and he wants to see how many licks it takes to get to the center of Blair Pendergrass."
"Shh." Cheeks blazing at the images Kanesha's words elicited, Blair frowned at the nursing director. It wasn't as if she needed her friend putting ideas in her head. Hadn't her own dreams betrayed her the night before? Filling her sleep with images of Oz? Of his magical fingers? Of that almost kiss? Thank God Stephanie had interrupted. Too bad her alarm clock hadn't followed suit. "He'll hear you."
"Hear what?" Oz asked, stepping up to the nurses' station, his gaze still locked onto Blair.
Kanesha's dark eyes glittered. "That Blair is hoping you'll change your mind about being in the auction so she can bid on you."
Along with her stomach, Blair's jaw dropped. "I didn't say that."
"Didn't have to." Snickering, Kanesha walked off while mumbling something about checking the patient schedule and leaving them alone.
Why was everyone purposely leaving them alone? She didn't want to be alone with Oz.
"I didn't say that," she repeated, fighting to catch her breath. Did she sound like a broken record? No matter. "I did not say I wanted to bid on you."
"I didn't think you did." Oz gave her a thoughtful look. "You're still short on bachelors?"
"Nothing's changed since last night," she snapped, then realized she was being rude. Regardless of what had happened, regardless of the personal distance she wanted between them, they worked together.
Forcing herself to relax, she started over. "Latham Duke's son agreed to the auction. We need one more to even out the numbers between bachelors and bachelorettes," she said in an even tone, glad to focus on something other than the man standing so close to her.
"I'm the prime candidate?" Oz stepped closer to her, so close she could feel his body heat, was swamped with the fresh scent of his soap and spicy aftershave.
She gulped. "I didn't say that."
His gaze bored into her. "But initially, you signed me up to do the auction. If I had been agreeable you wouldn't be short a bachelor?"
"True, but..." She took a step back, surprised to realize she didn't want him in the auction, didn't want to watch women haggling over him. When had that happened? She'd been the one to initially put his name on the list and hadn't thought twice about doing so.
"I'll think about it."
"You will?" Blair blinked in surprise. He'd been so adamant about not being auctioned off, had seemed upset that she'd added him onto the list. What had changed his mind? Surely he hadn't believed Kanesha? Even if he had, so what? It wasn't as if Oz wanted her to bid on his date.
Did he?
"Why not?" He shrugged. "It's for Dr T. Like I said, I'll think about it."
Relief filled her. His reconsidering had nothing to do with the night before, had only to do with his love for Dr Talbot. "How is he this morning? I called, but Stephanie said the physical therapist came early to work with him."
"Grouchy---the therapist came early."
Blair smiled. That was her Dr T. "Did he sleep okay?"
"Like a baby." Oz leaned against the nurses' station desk. "He only woke once during the night."
"Thank goodness."
Silence loomed between them for several torturous seconds.
"Mr Duke has an appointment this morning, doesn't he?"
Grateful for the subject change, Blair nodded. "I put him in room one. He plans to proceed with the mitral valve repair."
"Good," Oz said. "We'll get him on the schedule. What else do we have this morning?"
"Several consults and follow-up appointments. The lady Dr Majors spoke with you about yesterday is also here. He asked if you'd call him to let him know how you plan to proceed with Georgia Donelson's care. He had a few questions about his being auctioned off, too." Blair drew her brows into a vee. "He did really say yes, right?"
Oz laughed. "Why? Did you think I coerced him into volunteering?"
"He just sounded a little flustered when he asked me about the auction. I wondered why he'd agreed." Blair picked up her stethoscope from the nurses' desk and followed Oz toward the patient rooms. "It's no secret that he's involved with the nurse practitioner from his office."
"When I mentioned you needed more bachelors for the auction, Will volunteered. Maybe he just wants to help Dr T. Or maybe he's hoping Leslie will bid on him." Oz turned, gave Blair an intense look. "Maybe that's why I'm thinking about agreeing, too."
Blair's heart skipped a beat. "So Will's girlfriend can bid on you?"
"So you can bid on me." Oz's eyes twinkled with mischief. "You would bid on me if I volunteered, right?"
"I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you."
Oz watched Blair review what Mr Duke would need for his pre-surgical workup. She moved in precise, skilled movements, just as she always did. But she was distracted, aware of him watching her.
Why had he said he'd think about agreeing to the auction? That he wanted Blair to bid on him?
Hadn't he decided the night before that the best thing to do was to forget about that massage?
If only he could.
Except for following Kanesha's joke, Blair had purposely kept her gaze averted from Oz's, sending a strong message. She really planned to pretend nothing had happened between them. Damn it. Why wasn't he grateful that she wasn't demanding more of him? That she wasn't asking what right he'd had to touch her?
In his dreams last night he'd done much more. He'd made love to Blair, over and over, until their bodies had been slick with sweat and he could no longer tell where he ended and she began.
He bit back a groan.
After Blair finished going over needed pre-surgical tests, Mr Duke turned to her. "My son is a little nervous about the auction. He asked me to find out if his date plans were okay or if he needed to come up with something more elaborate."
"His date package sounds fine to me." Blair stepped back so Oz could examine him. "Just so long as he's a skilled pilot."
"He is," Mr Duke assured in the proud tone he used when discussing his son. "He's been flying since he was a small boy. The Cessna is mine, but he takes her up more than I do these days."
"You should make time in the future." Oz placed the stethoscope diaphragm against Mr Duke's hairy chest. "Enjoy life more rather than spending all your time at the bank."
"From your mouth to God's ears." The man gave a self-derisive smile. "Actually, my wife is pushing me to retire so I can do just that."
"Good for her," Oz praised and meant it. Life was short. Each moment should be lived to the fullest. Something else he'd figured out since Dr T had gotten so ill.
His gaze went to Blair. She bit her lower lip, staring at him with a confused look.
Life was short. Too short.
More than anything, in that moment Oz wanted to touch her face, to feel her heartbeat next to his. He very quickly denied the unfamiliar emotion and buried it deep.
When he saw his next patient for the morning, he was the one ignoring Blair.
Oz listened to Georgia Donelson's heart. He didn't like what he heard any better than he'd liked her test results.
"I reviewed your echocardiogram, the ultrasound of your heart that Dr Majors ordered. Like he explained, two of your heart's valves aren't properly closing."
"Can you fix them?" The gray-haired woman laced her hands in her lap, possibly in a silent prayer.
"Yes, but not easily. I can repair the pulmonic valve by cutting away the portion that isn't sealing and suturing a new flap. But the mitral valve will have to be replaced. I need to schedule you for surgery as soon as possible. Preferably within a week or two at most."
Looking stunned, she shook her head. "I'm not sure I can put this on my daughter right now."
"Caden is doing better. Lacey is stronger than you think. She'll want what's best for you." Blair reached out, placed her hand over the woman's and gave a reassuring squeeze.
Oz hadn't initially made the connection, but everyone in the hospital knew of Georgia's grandson, who had been seriously injured in a motor vehicle accident.
"If we don't repair your heart, and soon, it'll likely kill you." He'd learned long ago there was a time for sugar coating and a time to lay it all out there. Georgia needed to make the right choice. The choice that would save her life.
She looked to Blair for confirmation. Blair nodded, her eyes a bit glassy from unshed tears.
Oz couldn't pull his gaze away. How did she do that? Be so connected to her patients? Blair treated each and every person she came into contact with as if they were a cherished family member.
Georgia's head hung low. "I need to talk to Lacey first. Then I'll schedule for whenever you think."
Oz explained what she should expect, then leaving Blair to make arrangements, he checked on another patient. On his way to lunch, he bumped into Blair.
"Going to lunch?"
She shook her head. "I'm skipping lunch. I need to make the calls on Stephanie's list," she reminded him. "I won't have time to do both."
Oz couldn't stand the thought of her going hungry.
"Sure you have time. We'll eat in the hospital cafeteria. When we're finished, I'll help you make the calls."
"That's not a good idea." She ran her fingers along her stethoscope, fiddling with the diaphragm. "People will think..." Her voice trailed off.
"That we're discussing the auction? Trying to make the fund-raiser as successful as possible for the man we both care about?" he filled in.
His gaze skimmed over her solid maroon scrubs. She shouldn't be skipping lunch. She was perfect just as she was. Generous breasts, nipped-in waist, curvy hips, but his gaze always came back to her wide eyes. Her gorgeous green eyes that sucked him right in.
Too bad Blair would want commitment. Too bad that was something he could never give her. Something he'd never want to give any woman.
"That is what we'll be doing, Blair. Nothing more, if that's what you're concerned about."
"No, I..." She wavered, looking uncertain. "You're right. We need to do this. For Dr Talbot. And I am hungry." Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath, then forced a smile, one that said she'd rather have a bikini wax than lunch with him. "I do need to hear about your arrangements for the catering."
"And to talk me into filling your last bachelor spot?" He wasn't sure why he'd said it. No, that wasn't true. He did know. He'd mentioned the auction because he knew Blair wanted him to agree to the auction, and like some schoolboy, he wanted to please her. Even if he couldn't have her.
Oz blinked. What the hell was he doing? Apparently his sanity had snapped.
"True, I do need to fill the last spot," she admitted, eyeing him suspiciously. No wonder with his odd behavior. "I still can't believe you don't want to be auctioned."
"You shouldn't be so quick to assume things about me." Hadn't that been how he and Dr T had gotten close? Because others assumed false things about Oz, but Dr T had taken a closer look, had seen someone worthy of taking under his wing.
When it came down to it, Blair was just like everyone else.
Her eyes darkened to a deep green. "I owe you an apology about last night."
Oz quirked a brow in surprise.
"I shouldn't have said what I did. About you staying away from Addy. She wouldn't understand and would be quite heartbroken if you avoided her. I'm sorry."
He hadn't expected her apology. Before he could respond, his cell phone rang.
He glanced at the number, silently cursed as he answered the call. A myocardial infarction had come into the emergency room and the E.R. physician had asked for him to be paged. He took the specifics, gave orders and promised to be there in less than two minutes.
When he snapped his phone shut, he met Blair's gaze. He started to apologize at running out on her after promising to help make the calls.
"No need to say anything. I heard." She waved him away. "Go. Save a life."
Wishing he had time to say more, that he had time for lunch, Oz reached for her hand. "I'll see you in the cardiac unit later."
Their fingers briefly touched.
Hurrying toward the E.R., Oz's mind raced. Why had he grabbed Blair's hand? Why had he felt the need to touch her?
Because of the night before? Because of the sweet softness of her skin? Because in his dreams he'd touched every inch of her?
Worse, how had the simple skin-to-skin contact made him feel better, yet more confused than ever?
That evening, hand in hand with Addy, Blair climbed the steps to Dr Talbot's beach-style home's front stoop.
Could she do this? How could she not?
Visiting her friend hadn't been so stressful prior to Oz moving in with him. The living arrangement made sense. Dr Talbot didn't need to be alone. Oz needed a place to live while he filled in for the heart surgeon.
But visiting with her beloved friend meant routinely seeing Oz outside of work.
Seeing him at work was bad enough.
Seeing Oz laugh and joke with the man she loved, seeing their close relationship, how Oz took care of Dr Talbot---well, it tugged at places inside her she'd rather not have tugged on, thank you very much.
Especially after last night. This afternoon.
She wouldn't even go into what watching him play with Addy did to her.
She preferred thinking of Oz as a playboy womanizer. It was much easier to compartmentalize him as totally undateable.
He was undateable. Under normal circumstances he'd have a different woman every weekend. It was only Dr Talbot's illness curbing his sexual appetite, making him act out of character in ways that made Blair think she might have been wrong about him.
She knew all this.
But why had he touched her hand this afternoon?
"Can I push the bell, Mommy?" Addy asked, bouncing up and down at Blair's side on the small front porch. "Can I, please?"
Nodding, Blair braced herself. Would Oz be in jeans? Shorts? Please, not shorts. The sight of his hairy, muscular legs about did her in the last time she'd visited Dr Talbot. He'd been out running on the beach and---jeans.
He was wearing jeans.
"Hi, Dr Oz," Addy greeted him with a toothy smile. She'd lost her first tooth while at school that day and wanted the world to know she'd entered the world of being grown-up. At least that was how her five-year-old mind viewed getting a "grown-up" tooth. Blair preferred not to think about her baby growing up anytime soon. It seemed as if Addy had only been getting her first tooth not so long ago.
Dear Lord, was she prattling to distract herself from the man standing in the doorway?
"Hey, Pipsqueak." Oz flashed a killer smile Addy's way, did their usual high-five hand greeting. Her daughter ate up the male attention, batting her lashes and smiling pretty as you please. Oz motioned for Blair and Addy to step inside the house. "You're looking beautiful today."
Standing in the hardwood foyer with its white spindled staircase, Addy giggled, eyelashes still fluttering. "What about Mommy? Is she looking beautiful?"
Blair grimaced. Out of the mouth of babes.
Oz's gaze shifted, ran over her from head to toe.
Oh, my. How did he reduce her to mush with one look? One scorching look, but still, just one look.
"Your mommy looks beautiful, too." His voice was low. "She always does."
Blair swallowed, refusing to look at him although she knew he still looked at her, sensed that he wanted her to look at him, that he wanted a response to his heated look, to his words. How could she respond when she didn't understand what was happening? When she was sure, whatever it was, she didn't like or want it?
"It's because I did her hair when she got out of the shower after work." Addy beamed at Blair's short bob that she'd blow-dried into a fluffy style. Much fluffier than Blair's usual cut that slanted in to frame her face. Addy had been so proud of her efforts Blair hadn't had the heart to comb out the teased locks.
"She even let me put in mousse." Addy wiggled her fingers back and forth as if they still had sticky mousse on them. "I like mousse."
Rocking back on his bare feet, Oz arched an eyebrow. "Mousse? That explains why she looks so sexy."
Addy giggled at his use of the word sexy. Blair melted, wishing she could recapture some of her usual cynicism when it came to compliments from Oz.
What was it about him that made her feel sexy?
Six years and she hadn't felt sexy, hadn't even wanted to feel sexy. Now, in front of her impressionable five-year-old daughter, she wanted to throw herself at Oz. She wouldn't, of course. But she couldn't shut off the images in her head. Images of Oz.
Blair bit the inside of her cheek.
What had that massage done to her? Surely, one little massage couldn't warp a woman's brain so intensely? And that touch of her hand, it might have rattled her, but surely it hadn't kidnapped her common sense?
"Mommy, why are your eyes closed?"
Because she might die of humiliation if Oz saw the truth in her eyes. She hadn't experienced passion since Chris.
Chris. Was that why she was attracted to Oz? He shared similar features with Addy's father. Blond hair, blue eyes, tall, pin-up calendar body, playboy personality.
Although a similarity to Chris should have a negative effect, it had to be why she felt so vulnerable around Oz. What else could explain her emotional weakness?
Only no matter how she tried to categorize him as being like Chris, she couldn't make the comparison work. Chris had been too self-centered to ever put his life on hold the way Oz had.
"Mommy?" Addy tugged on her hand. "What's wrong with you? Your face is squishy."
Blair opened her eyes, but she didn't know what to say. She didn't lie to her daughter. But she sure couldn't tell her the truth.
"I didn't know you did hair, Pipsqueak." Oz came to the rescue. He gave a look of being duly impressed by Addy's styling efforts. "I'll keep your skill with the mousse in mind the next time I'm in the mood for a new do."
Giving Blair one last confused look, Addy turned her intent gaze to Oz and studied him. "I like your hair, Dr Oz."
With a curious glance that said he wanted to know what Blair had been thinking while her eyes were closed, Oz tugged on one of Addy's pigtails. "You like my hair, Pipsqueak?"
Addy nodded. "Your hair is kind of spiky. In a good way."
Oz laughed. "Is there a bad way?"
"Oh, yes." Addy's blond head bobbed, her curly pigtails bouncing back and forth. "Scott Richards in my class at school has bad spiky hair." She made a thoroughly disgusted face. "He looks like an alien, doesn't he, Mommy?"
Blair gave her daughter a warning look. "Remember what I told you about saying things that aren't nice, Addy."
Her daughter blinked. "But Scott's not here, Mommy. How am I going to hurt his feelings if he's not here?"
How did a mother argue with a five-year-old's logic?
"Sometimes people overhear things we don't intend for them to hear, and it hurts their feelings. Scott is your friend. You'd never want to hurt his feelings."
"No." Addy considered her for a moment, then stage-whispered in all seriousness, "But he does look like an alien."
"Is that Addy I hear?" a gruff voice called from the living room before Blair could correct her daughter.
"Dr Talbot!" Addy shrieked, looking up at her mother for permission to go find the man she treated as a beloved grandfather. He was the closest thing Addy had to a grandfather since Chris's family had refused to acknowledge her existence when Blair had told them of her pregnancy. Their loss.
Blair nodded permission, and Addy took off at a run toward where she knew she'd find her favorite person, leaving Blair alone with Oz.
"She has a future in hairdressing." Oz gave Blair's hair another once-over. Her body, too. Hooking his thumbs through his belt loops, he slid his fingers into his front pockets. "You look great, like you just crawled out of bed."
What was she supposed to say to that?
Oz looked great in his jeans and royal blue T-shirt, too. She loved his hands, loved knowing what they were capable of in the surgery suite. But my, oh, my, his bare feet twisted her mind with unwanted thoughts.
Blair shook her head, unwilling to let that image go further. Ignoring his compliment, she focused on her daughter. "Addy still has a few lessons to learn in diplomacy and learning to censor what she says."
Must take after her mother, who certainly struggled with censoring her thoughts.
"She'll learn." Unabashed desire shone in his eyes. "You really do look great."
Blair swallowed. She didn't need this. Not while dealing with way too many things to consider becoming involved with a man notorious for flings and his commitment-phobia.
Not that she was looking for commitment.
She wasn't looking at all.
Not for a relationship. Not for a fling.
So why couldn't she drag her gaze away from Oz's tempting smile?
OZ ROCKED back on his heels, watching displeasure furrow Blair's brow. What was she thinking? Feeling?
She was digesting what he'd said. He was sure of it. Had he crossed the line yet again? Hell, he didn't seem capable of not crossing it where she was concerned.
"If she doesn't learn diplomacy," he ventured, drawing Blair's gaze back to him, "she's so cute no one will care."
Her expression hardened. "That's a lesson my daughter has learned all too well. If she bats her lashes and looks cute, adults tend to do her bidding. I do my best not to give in since I don't want to encourage behaviors that are so reminiscent of---"
She stopped abruptly, but Oz could fill in the blanks. She'd been referring to Addy's father, had implied that he'd used his looks to manipulate those around him to do his bidding. He'd never heard Blair mention him before.
The reminder that there had once been a man in her life who she had cared for, a man who had fathered her child, did strange things to Oz's insides.
Like making him nauseated.
"She looks just like you."
Her scowl deepened. "Yeah, right. She looks more like you than she does me."
Her eyes widened. Her face paled. Interesting. Did that mean he looked like Addy's father? Why did that thought make him want to grab a few antacids?
"Addy's facial expressions are yours made over," he insisted, wanting her to think about anything other than the other man. "The way she smiles, the way her eyebrow quirks when she thinks I'm trying to pull a fast one on her, the intelligence in her eyes. That's pure you, Blair."
True, but perhaps he'd said so to wipe away the memory that Blair hadn't conceived Addy all on her lonesome. The thought of her with another man left him feeling as if someone had chopped him in the throat.
"Maybe." She stared at him, as if trying to see inside his head.
Good thing she couldn't because Oz didn't know what she might see. Lately, he didn't know what had come over him.
Just that he couldn't stop thinking about the woman who was now frowning at him.
Giggles filled the house. Pure in spirit giggles that lightened Oz's insides and made him smile.
"Come on. We'll call a truce for now." He held out his hand. "The old coot's been waiting for you to get here since I got home."
She didn't take his hand. Instead, she walked past him into the den. Oz sighed.
The "old coot" had Addy's arms wrapped around his neck. Giggling, she placed sloppy kisses on his cheek while he told her something Oz couldn't make out.
"I missed you, Dr Talbot."
Anger sucker-punched Oz in the gut at the vision of the withered man Dr Talbot had become. A thin, frail skeleton had replaced the vibrant man Dr Ted Talbot had once been.
Still, his eyes shone brightly at Addy's enthusiastic affection. Blair, Addy and Stephanie's constant attention kept the older man going. It was what made him want to get out of bed each morning, what he most looked forward to each day.
"I missed you, too, darlin'." Dr T gave Addy another hug. He glanced up, spotted Blair and smiled. "Addy was telling me she styled your hair with mousse." He studied her for a moment. "Mousse becomes you."
"Dr Oz says Mommy looks sexy," Addy volunteered helpfully.
Leave it to Addy to repeat that particular compliment. After Stephanie's news from the night before, no doubt Dr T would be asking more questions about Oz's relationship with Blair.
"Oh?" A frown furrowed Dr T's pale face.
Embarrassment brightened Blair's cheeks to a pretty shade of pink.
Damn, she did look sexy. Her feet were nestled in white sandals that revealed pink toenails. She wore a sunny yellow top and white capri pants that covered more than they revealed, but left Oz's imagination running wild. Blair was the kind of sexy that reached out and caught a man unawares and left him panting to uncover every delectable morsel of her flesh.
Oz panted.
Not liking his thoughts, he shrugged. "I call things as I see them."
Oz thought she was sexy.
Flustered by his admission, Blair walked to where Dr Talbot sat on the brown leather sofa with a white cotton blanket covering his lower half. The pillow at the end of the sofa had a fresh head imprint, suggesting he'd been resting when he'd heard their voices. She kissed his cheek, which was still wet from Addy's kisses. Her daughter squirmed next to him.
Bony fingers grasped Blair's hand, held her until she looked at him. "Oz said you were sexy?"
"Dr Manning thinks every woman is sexy," she countered flippantly. Oz's words hadn't meant a thing. Just like that almost kiss hadn't meant a thing. Hadn't Dr Talbot been the one to tell her of Oz's many escapades with women? How he changed women every few weeks, none able to hold his interest for long? Hadn't she seen with her own eyes that he'd brought a different bombshell every visit he'd made to the Gulf?
"Blair?" Dr Talbot's body might be frail, but his pale blue gaze was strong, piercing.
"Addy asked what he thought about my hair. That's all." Blair smiled brightly. "I'll warn you, she's already offered to do Dr Manning's hair. Be careful what you say or she'll be offering to style yours as well."
Her little ears not missing a thing, Addy's eyes lit. She looked at Dr Talbot's shiny head, covered by only a few stray strands of white now that his once thick hair had fallen victim to his chemotherapy. She frowned.
"He doesn't have hair, Mommy." Apparently recalling their conversation in the hallway about hurting feelings, Addy's mouth rounded with an uh-oh.
"Did you tell Dr T about Scott Richards's spiky hair?" Oz yet again came to a Pendergrass female's rescue. Perhaps, instead of jeans, he should be wearing armor and riding a white horse. Nah, more like a black horse and dressed in some heinous villain garb.
Oz was no white knight. Blair would do well to remember that.
He sat down in a recliner where he'd apparently been watching a baseball game with Dr Talbot prior to their arrival. The television's wide flat-screen picture still played, but the volume had been muted. Probably by Dr Talbot when they'd been in the foyer discussing Blair's hair.
Avoiding looking toward Oz, Blair sat on the sofa near Dr Talbot, her hand still ensconced in his bony one. She refused to look at him, too, knowing he knew her too well not to see how Oz affected her.
Fortunately, Addy launched into a tale about her schoolmate's hair, running through a gamut of subjects, including her lost tooth, which she proudly pointed out, openmouthed, before glancing around the den. "Where is Boo-boo?"
Boo-boo, the inspiration for Addy's virtual pet, was the stray puppy Dr Talbot had taken in when it had shown up on his doorstep half-starved and flea ridden. After several years of Dr Talbot's care, Boo-boo flourished and adored visits from Addy almost as much as Addy loved playing with the rambunctious mutt that appeared part Labrador, part who knew what.
"He's in the backyard, Pipsqueak," Oz assured, looking restless. "You wanna go out and see if he'll play fetch with us? I'll go with you so your mom and Dr T can visit. If that's okay with your mom?"
Blair cringed. She'd been wrong to try to throw Addy into their disagreement last night. She'd apologized, but Oz's hesitation hit hard.
Addy squealed her delight. "Can I, Mommy? I like playing Boo-boo ball with Dr Oz."
Playing Boo-boo ball was Addy and Oz's thing and yet another reason Addy adored him. He never seemed to mind spending one-on-one time with her.
"You're sure you don't mind?" Surely his duties as Dr Talbot's house guest didn't include resident babysitter? Yet, each time they visited, Oz took Addy out to play with Boo-boo or to walk the dog so Blair could visit with Dr Talbot in private for at least a few minutes.
A man she'd judged as self-centered, his thoughtfulness never failed to surprise her. But she didn't allow herself to consider it too closely. If she did, Oz might climb out of the neat box she'd stuffed him into. If she ever allowed him to, she was in trouble.
After that massage, that touch at the hospital, the way he kept looking at her, she was in trouble enough.
"She gets cuter every time I see her," Dr Talbot praised.
Addy took Oz's hand and led him out of the den. She skipped with excitement and talked a mile a minute.
"You know she's going to be a total heartbreaker when she's older."
It was a conversation they had each time Blair and Addy visited.
"I know." Blair gave his hand an emotional squeeze. "Good thing I'll have you around to help me fight off the boys."
Dr Talbot's pale blue eyes lowered. "Not so sure about that, girl."
"Has something changed?" Panic seized Blair. "What is the oncologist saying? Have you talked to the Mayo Clinic again? Are you a candidate for the experimental chemotherapy?"
"My oncologist is saying the chemotherapy has done all it's going to. The metastatic lesions on my liver and pancreas aren't shrinking. My blood counts are too low." Dr Talbot's hand tightened around Blair's, trembling slightly. "There's nothing more that can be done."
Unacceptable. She wouldn't let him die. Not if there was any possibility of treating his cancer.
"But the Xabartan is still an option?" Although U.S. trials were limited, the experimental drug was showing great success in China. Side effects were horrendous, but when one had nothing to lose, bad side effects didn't seem so daunting. "You'll do the treatments if you're approved as a candidate?"
She'd talk to Oz again, beg him to use his connections in Rochester to get Dr Talbot approved for treatment.
Dr Talbot gave a tired sigh. "I've done chemo, Blair. Radiation and surgery, too. The cancer is still growing. I've lost my hair, my dignity." He hadn't taken well to the colostomy bag after his descending colon had been resected. "Enough is enough."
She waved her hand in front of his face. "Hello. Where is the man who was going to fight this to the end? You can't quit now."
"Do I really want my last days to be spent battling not only my cancer, but the ill effects of a medicine that's going to make me sicker?" He gave a weary sigh. "I want to die at home, Blair. In the comfort of my own home."
This was not her Dr Talbot speaking. He was a fighter. To the end. He had to be. She needed him to be.
Tears trickled down her cheeks. "I'm not ready to lose you from my and Addy's lives."
At Blair's anguished cry, he squeezed her hand again. "There's no need for tears, Blair. I had a good life and have no regrets. Selma's been gone a long time. Maybe it's time for me to join her."
Blair refused to believe that. Dr Talbot had a lot of life left to live. Had a lot of lives left to save. Had a lot of love left to receive.
Hers. Addy's. Stephanie's. Oz's. They all loved him.
"What does Dr Manning say about this new attitude of yours?" Blair sucked in a deep breath, steadied her frayed nerves and put on a brave face. She had to be strong. She was strong. She'd always had to be.
"Oz will support whatever I decide," Dr Talbot surprised Blair by saying. "I deserve to die in peace, in the comfort of my home rather than an out-of-state hospital if that's what I choose. It's what I gave Selma." Dr Talbot had practically bankrupted himself providing expensive private medical care twenty-four hours a day for his wife so she could stay at home, could die at home as she'd wished. "It's what I want, too."
"Oz is agreeable to you not pursuing every avenue?" She didn't believe it. Why would Oz not want Dr Talbot to try everything? "Why is he helping put the benefit together to raise money to help cover the cost of your treatments?"
"Because I won't take money from him." Dr Talbot sounded tired. "He's making the choice mine."
"Oz offered to pay for your treatments?" She'd wondered. Dr Talbot had once said Oz's family was old money, but she wasn't sure if that equated into Oz having part of that wealth. Apparently so. Handsome, a skilled surgeon, compassionate toward his friend, great with kids and rich to boot. Did the man have any flaws?
Oh, yeah, he did. He was a womanizing playboy. She needed to remember that. Just because there was a hiatus while he was taking care of Dr Talbot didn't mean he'd really changed.
"He's repeatedly offered, just as he did during Selma's illness, but I won't take handouts from the boy. He has better things to spend his money on than a lost cause." Dr Talbot's pale blue eyes bored into her, asking a thousand questions Blair didn't know the answers to, but likely wouldn't have answered even if she had.
"You are anything but a lost cause."
She couldn't bear the thought of losing him. Nor could she allow herself to give in to the sorrow plaguing her soul. Be strong. Be brave.
"Enough of this depressing subject." She pasted a smile onto her face. "Tell me about our favorite soap opera. Did Barbara discover that Nathanial is really still alive?"
Since his illness, Dr Talbot had spent a lot of time watching television simply because he'd been too sick to do anything more. Blair and Reesee had been fans of Dare to Love since they'd watched the show with their mother. Now Dr Talbot kept Blair up-to-date on the show's happenings. Blair mostly asked because the show gave him something to look forward to each day.
But her friend's pale eyes lit as he pinned her beneath his knowing gaze. "Why don't you tell me about your real-life soap opera instead?"
"WHAT real life soap opera?" Blair pretended to have no clue what he referred to. Darn Oz for massaging her neck last night, for saying she was sexy. For so many reasons, darn him. "I lead a dull life."
"Dull?" Dr Talbot picked at a loose thread on the white blanket covering his legs. "That's not how I hear it."
Stephanie had told him. Blair sighed. Of course the woman had told Dr Talbot what she'd seen.
"I'm not sure what you heard, but I assure you my love life is quite dull."
"Did I mention your love life?" Dr Talbot's thin brows lifted.
She'd walked right into that one.
"Besides, if your love life is dull, it's because you choose for it to be." Dr Talbot's lips pursed in disapproval. "You should date. If I had my way, you'd be up for auction at my benefit just so you'd get out and meet a nice guy."
"A nice guy wouldn't necessarily bid on my date." Not at any point had she considered being one of the bachelorettes. She'd be busy enough helping oversee the night's events without being auctioned. "Besides, I don't have time for dating. Addy and Reesee are my priorities. Not searching for some elusive Mr Right."
They'd had this argument before. Dr Talbot didn't understand why she refused to date. Then again, he didn't know how badly she'd hurt after Chris. How betrayed she'd felt when she'd discovered the truth.
No wonder they'd bonded so intently when she'd come to work at Madison Memorial. Dr Talbot had been grieving for his dying wife and Blair had been grieving for Chris, her mother and so many of her dreams of a happily-ever-after.
"What about Oz?"
Oz wasn't her Mr Right. No way.
Blair blinked, knowing she didn't quite pull off as innocent a look as she wished. "What about him?"
"My cancer may have left me a feeble old man, but I'm not daft," her friend admonished. "Neither is Stephanie. What's going on between you and Oz?"
Hadn't she dealt with this question this morning at work? Dealing with Kanesha had been much easier than meeting Dr Talbot's expectant gaze.
"I'm tolerating Oz's company until you get well enough to come back to work."
Dr Talbot gave her a try again look. "You like him, don't you?"
No, she didn't.
"I like you and want you to get well so he can go back to whatever cave he crawled out of. He's a total Neanderthal. I have no clue how the two of you became such good friends."
"You're protesting too much, Blair. He gets to you." Dr Talbot chuckled. "Selma always said Oz was a killer when it came to the ladies. Why, I remember a whole slew of nurses with broken hearts when he finished his residency with me."
"Good for him," she huffed. A whole slew of broken hearts. No surprise there. Oz was a heartbreaker and would break her heart if she let him. She had no intention of letting him. "But I'm not interested in hearing about Dr Manning's love life."
"You sure?"
"Oz is arrogant and self-centered. I only tolerate him because he's your friend and because I work with him. Really," she added at his curious look.
"Oz isn't so bad," Dr Talbot said, once again surprising her. In the past she'd gotten the distinct impression he'd steered her away from any interest in Oz, that he'd encouraged her avoidance of his former star student.
"Actually," he continued, "I'd be hard pressed to name a better man or one I'd trust more. Don't write Oz off without taking a closer look."
Hadn't Oz said something similar? Accused her of making unfair assumptions about him?
Addy's muffled cries had both of their heads turning toward the French windows leading out onto the patio.
Adrenaline gripped Blair's heart in a tight fist. She jumped from the sofa. Before she'd crossed the room, Oz burst in, holding Addy close to his chest.
Blood covered her left leg, her hands, Oz's hands.
Tears ran down Addy's cheeks. Her lower lip trembling, she reached for Blair. "I want---Mommy."
She didn't need to be a nurse to register that her daughter was holding her bleeding knee and fighting sniffles in an effort to be brave.
Blair took Addy, hugging the little girl's shaking body.
"Shh, sweetheart, let Mommy see what happened," she soothed, trying to visualize from where the blood oozed. "What happened to your knee?"
"God, I'm sorry, Blair," Oz apologized, more repentant than she'd ever seen him. "We were playing with Boo-boo. She turned just as he jumped on her, and she fell."
Blair repositioned Addy to where she could see the gash. Blood gushed, making it difficult to see exactly how deep the cut was. She wrapped her hand around Addy's knee, pushing her palm tightly against the bleed, hoping the pressure would slow the blood flow.
"Get some antiseptic and a clean towel to apply pressure so we can stop the bleeding," she ordered a pale Oz. He didn't move, didn't seem to register that she'd spoken. "Dr Manning---" she spoke louder "---get something for me to clean Addy's cut with and a pressure bandage. Now."
"There's stuff in my medicine cabinet." Having tossed his blanket aside, Dr Talbot gripped his walker with both hands and strained to pull himself to his feet.
With one last glance toward Addy, Oz left the room.
"Baby girl, are you okay?" Dr Talbot peered toward Addy. He'd managed to stand and was making his way toward them.
Her lower lip quivering, Addy shook her head. "My leg hurts."
"It's just a cut, but she's bleeding steadily." Blair lifted her hand long enough to assess the wound. Not that she could tell much with the blood seeping from beneath her hand. "She's going to need a few stitches. I'll call her pediatrician and see if he'll meet us at his office or if he wants us to go to the emergency room."
Both hands tightly fastened to his walker, Dr Talbot shook his head. "No need to take her anywhere. I have sutures in my doctor's bag." At Blair's surprised look, the old man shrugged. "Hearts aren't the only thing I can sew up."
"Okay." Her friend appeared too weak to stand, much less to sew up her daughter's injury. But Blair would not be a naysayer. Not when he seemed so determined. She hoped the incident would remind him just how much he had to offer the world still.
Addy's sniffles had almost stopped, but her tiny arms clung to Blair.
Oz came back into the room, his hands full of items and a big fluffy towel. Blair sat down on the sofa, angling her position to where Addy's hurt leg dangled, giving easier access to the cut.
"Get some pressure on Addy's knee." Dr Talbot tottered back to the sofa, weakness obviously overtaking him.
Blair kissed the top of her daughter's head, her gaze going to Oz.
His skin had grown sweaty.
Surely a cocky top-notch heart surgeon wasn't afraid of a little girl's bloody knee?
Oz had never gotten sick during any surgical procedure. Not even during early medical school when some fourth-year residents had tried to gross out the new guy.
He never broke a sweat while performing the most complex of cardiac surgeries. Not unless it was from the lights.
But a sheen of sweat covered him.
That was Addy's blood.
Although he knew it was just a cut knee, he'd felt real anguish the moment he'd realized what was going to happen when Boo-boo had bounded toward the little girl. He'd called to the dog, but it had been too late. Boo-boo's exuberant leap had knocked Addy off her feet. She'd taken a tumble forward, landing on something sharp, probably a rock.
A vise had locked around his heart as Addy's face had crumpled and she'd bravely tried to contain her cries. He'd rushed to her and seen the blood oozing from her sliced open knee.
He glanced down at his bloodstained hands. Similar to Blair, he'd tried to stop the bleeding by putting pressure with his bare hands. Not a smart thing to do in this day and age of blood-borne diseases. All he'd been able to think was that he'd let Blair's daughter get hurt. That Addy was bleeding because he hadn't watched her closely enough. That somehow he'd failed Addy, hadn't protected her. That he'd failed Blair.
That she'd been right to tell him to stay away.
Oz's gaze dropped to Addy's knee. The blood flow had slowed, was forming a clot. But the gash was jagged enough, wide enough that she needed stitches for the area to properly heal. What was he doing standing there?
He was a heart surgeon. Used to having lives in his hands. This was only a scraped knee. No big deal. What was his problem?
Straightening his shoulders, he knelt and examined Addy's knee.
"Pipsqueak, I need you to hold still." He kept his voice gentle.
Blair began to whisper soft words to her daughter. Oz couldn't make them out, couldn't tell what she was saying, but her voice sounded musical, calming, even to him.
Addy remained perfectly still in her whispering mother's arms. Blair maneuvered her daughter to face Oz, then wrapped her arms around her, pinning Addy's arms in a hug. With her thighs, she captured Addy's injured leg to where the girl could squirm but not make any big movements. Soothing with her soft words during the entire maneuver, Blair had effectively stilled her daughter without alarming her.
"Pipsqueak, love, I'm going to look at your knee. I'll be as gentle as I can."
Tossing the towel onto the tiled floor beneath Addy's knee, he poured antiseptic over the wound, dabbing at the excess to keep as much as possible from spilling onto the towel. He poured more disinfectant over some gauze he'd found in the medicine cabinet. As gently as possible, he cleaned Addy's wound, wincing at the jagged tear.
"She needs stitches," Dr Talbot said from behind him. "I have suture supplies in my doctor's bag. It's in my office. Go get my bag, and I'll sew her up."
Pressing the antiseptic-soaked gauze to Addy's leg, then covering it with a piece of paper tape to maintain pressure, Oz went and found the old-fashioned black medicine bag.
When he came back, he glanced toward Dr T's drooping shoulders. Sadly, the effort of standing without assistance had drained the man's energy.
"If it's all the same, I'll suture her." Waiting for Dr T's nod, Oz drew up some Lidocaine and prepared to squirt the numbing agent into the gash. "She's not allergic to anything?"
"No." Blair shook her head.
"Not a shot." Addy's eyes filled with tears again when she saw what Oz held. She squirmed to no avail in Blair's arms. "I don't want a shot."
This was his fault. If he'd been watching her closer, none of this would have happened. If he'd called the dog away from her sooner, before he'd leaped...
"This will make your knee stop hurting." Blair hugged Addy tightly.
Oz squirted the numbing preparation into the open wound. Then, injecting through the desensitized gash itself, he deadened the area so Addy wouldn't feel him suture her.
While waiting for the area to deaden, he prepared the needle-nosed suture holders and ethilon thread.
His gaze met Blair's, seeking reassurance that she was ready. She nodded for him to proceed.
With Addy studying his every move and Dr Talbot giving advice over his shoulder the entire time, Oz stitched Addy's knee, closing her gaping flesh.
"Beautiful," Dr Talbot praised from where he'd watched Oz make every suture.
"Thank you," Blair said, hugging Addy close, kissing the top of the little girl's head every few seconds and whispering comforting words.
"That's not beautiful." Addy's puffy eyes stared woefully at her knee. "Mommy's hair is beautiful. Not my boo-boo."
"No, Boo-boo is in trouble for doing this to you," Dr Talbot said gruffly.
"Boo-boo didn't hurt me. A rock did."
Oz would do anything if he could take away the pain in Addy's eyes. Tears streaked her cherub face. Although her cut was still numb from the anesthetic, when the sensation returned, she would be sore. Guilt like none he'd ever known blindsided him.
Blair would never forgive him for allowing Addy to get hurt.
He couldn't blame her.
Words his mother had used to scream at his father echoed through Oz's head. Words that said Manning men shouldn't be allowed to father children, shouldn't be allowed to be responsible for another person's heart because all they were good for was cheating and lying.
Like father, like son.
Oz steeled himself for the pressure in his chest that always followed those memories and wasn't disappointed in anything other than his own shortcomings.
The following day, while keeping a watchful eye on the monitoring devices, Blair studied Oz. He manipulated the catheter through their patient's ascending aorta and into his heart.
Great concentration shone on his face.
"Damn," he muttered under his breath, his skin pulling tight over his face.
Usually so relaxed, Oz's tension permeated the room. He'd placed three stents in the right bundle branch. Each time he did, the artery collapsed distal to the correction, once again blocking blood flow.
"Pulse is fifty-two," Blair said, although from experience she knew Oz was as aware of Buster Anderson's vital statistics as she was. Oz absorbed everything about his patients.
"Buster---" Oz addressed the man "---I'm afraid this isn't working. I'm going to try one more thing, a newer technique, but if it doesn't work I'm going to have to open you up."
The man swallowed. "Then let's hope it works."
Not only did the procedure not work, but the man threw a clot, cutting off blood flow in a vital artery.
"Double damn," Oz cursed, starting CPR when the man's heart stopped.
Blair called a code, administered epinephrine at Oz's order.
With life-saving speed, they had Mr Anderson in the operating room, intubated and hooked up to a heart-lung machine that would oxygenate and circulate his blood, keeping his organs viable while they worked on his heart.
While Blair cleaned Mr Anderson's chest with antiseptic solution, another nurse did an instrument check. A nurse anesthetist monitored him from the head of the operating table.
Oz made the incision into his chest, through his sternum, exposing his heart.
Oz opened up the blocked artery. The second surgical team removed the bypass vein from Mr Anderson's leg. Oz used the vein to reroute Mr Anderson's blood flow while the other team closed the leg wound.
With clockwork precision Blair performed her job duties, anticipating Oz's every need prior to his asking.
They worked well together. They had from the start. Blair was only beginning to realize just how in sync they really were.
"You were amazing in there," she praised his efforts much later when they were removing their surgical gear. "Mr Anderson owes his life to your quick actions."
Oz raked his fingers through his blond hair, which was flattened from his surgical cap. "Hell, as soon as I saw that blockage, I should have sent him straight to the operating room instead of attempting to stent him."
"There was no way for you to know he was going to throw a clot. That he did wasn't through any fault of yours," she reminded him. For all his jokes, Oz took his patient care seriously. He thought he should be able to predict every patient's outcome. No doctor could.
"Some coincidence that he threw the clot while I was catheterizing him."
"Lucky for him," Blair insisted.
"Lucky." Oz paused outside the cardiac operating room, gave a quick smile of appreciation. "Thanks for your help. He owes his life as much to you as he does to me. You were fantastic when he coded."
Blair nodded. She hadn't done anything beyond what any trained nurse would do. Oz had been the miracle worker.
"What's next on tap?" he asked, his demeanor returning to normal.
"Two more arteriograms and a stress test," she reminded him. "Why don't you take a few minutes' break while I get the next patient set up?"
The next two arteriograms were uneventful.
Blair hooked monitoring equipment to Ralph Constance's chest, preparing him for his stress test. Due to the man's diabetic neuropathy and arthritis in his lower extremities, he was unable to do the stress test on the treadmill. A chemically induced test was being performed instead.
When they'd finished with the last patient for the day, Blair stepped into the hallway and let out a long sigh. She rubbed the back of her neck, massaging the tension twisting her muscles.
Why did her neck ache since Oz had massaged her?
What was wrong with her? Each day that passed seemed to leave her thinking about Oz more and more.
Each day that passed made her feel a little more susceptible to his charms.
A little? Now that was a joke. Her susceptibility was growing by leaps and bounds. Oz was climbing out of that box she'd stuffed him into. She needed him crammed back in there. Pronto.
Because, even if her brain knew Oz was really the womanizing playboy she'd painted him, the Oz of late had her heart thinking perhaps he wasn't so bad. Perhaps he'd changed and wasn't really like Chris.
Leaning her forehead against the empty back hallway of the cardiac cath lab, she dug her fingers deeper into her tense flesh.
Moist heat blew against the back of her neck, prickling every hair, electrifying every cell in her body. She didn't have to look to know who stood behind her. Instinctively she knew, her body recognizing Oz's presence.
Ready to tell him to stop, that she was becoming too weak to fight him, she spun.
And toppled right into his arms.
He caught her, but didn't let go.
God, he felt good. Smelled good.
His eyes twinkled and a smile curved his lips. "Really, Blair, can't you wait until the night of the auction before you throw yourself at me?"
The night of the auction? Did that mean he was agreeing? That he really wanted her to bid on him?
What was she thinking?
This was Oz. He was teasing her.
She needed to get a grip.
And not on Oz's shoulders to keep herself from falling.
Her throat tightened and the knots in her neck twisted so tight they threatened to snap. A strangled sound escaped from her open mouth.
But for the life of her, she couldn't speak, couldn't pull loose from his hold, couldn't let go of him.
His eyes darkened. His smile faded. Oz drew her close. So close she could feel his breath against her cheek. "Are you okay?"
She wasn't.
She felt light-headed. Dizzy. Breathless.
This was Oz. Why was she going into sensory overload? Why did the moist heat of his breath goose-bump her flesh? Why did she want to stretch onto her tiptoes and touch her lips to his?
His hand slid behind her, cradling the back of her neck. He held her close, his mouth centimeters from hers. "Blair?"
A hot flush drenched her skin. Her gaze dropped to his mouth.
What would it feel like to have Oz's mouth against hers? To have him kiss her with the passion for life that coursed through his veins? Would his lips be gentle? Demanding? Warm? Cool? Would his tongue slip into her mouth? Would---
She had to stop. She didn't want Oz. Not really. She couldn't deal with all the emotional pain that followed being involved with a man like Oz. She couldn't. Wouldn't.
She placed her palms against his chest, planning to push him away. Her fingers stilled. She flattened her hand over his heart.
His racing heart.
Her pulse jumped from eighty to a few thousand beats per second.
She lifted her gaze to his.
He wanted to kiss her. Surely that was why his heart beat so fast.
Dear sweet heaven, Oz wanted to kiss her, and his heart beat as crazily as her own.
It shouldn't matter that he was as physically affected as she was by the strange chemistry between them.
Unfortunately, it did and left her powerless against the desire erupting inside her body.
"Blair." Oz's lips brushed against hers. His mouth tasted hers. Soft. Gentle. Reverent.
Yet hungry.
Desperately hungry.
Starved.
She pressed against him, wanting closer, wanting as much contact as possible. Deep in her mind she registered stress had likely caused her weakness. Probably, stress had caused Oz's reaction to her, too. But she couldn't pull away, didn't even want to try.
Her fingers slipped into his hair. Soft. His hair was so soft. So were his lips. Soft, yet hard.
His whole body was hard.
He pressed her against the concrete hospital wall, pushed against her, groaned. "I swore I wasn't going to do this. I know I started it, but we have to stop. We're in the hallway."
He was right. If caught, she'd forever be labeled as the woman who had been making out in the back cardiac hallway with the seductive Dr Oz Manning. Eventually, he'd leave Madison, but she had no plans to leave. She'd be the one left facing the consequences of a few stolen moments of pleasure.
Nothing new there.
"I shouldn't have kissed you, Blair."
Rattled by his kiss and by how much she'd wanted him to keep kissing her forever, she frowned. "Why not?"
"I'd never want to hurt you or Addy." He drew in a deep breath, raked his fingers through his hair. "A relationship between us would never work. We're too different, want different things from life. We can't be more than friends."
"If we were more than friends you'd hurt me?" She knew it was true even before he answered. Hadn't she always known? Wasn't that really why she'd avoided him all those years? Because she'd known Oz had the power to hurt her? Perhaps even more so than Chris had?
"It's what I do." He took her hand in his and lifted it to his lips. "What I don't want to do to you, Blair. I don't do commitment, you don't do flings. This is new to me, but I really would like us to be friends."
Blair let his words sink in, searched his eyes for some sign he was kidding. For some sign he wanted her to say yes, she'd love to have a fling with him. Because, in the insanity of the moment, that was exactly what she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs. Sure, she recognized that her insanity was temporary, that she'd regret saying anything of the sort. But in the heady aftermath of Oz's kiss, she didn't want sanity, didn't want logical. For once she just wanted to feel.
"I want to be friends, Blair. Say yes."
God, he was serious. He wanted to be her friend. "Why? For Dr Talbot's sake?"
"If Dr T is the only reason you can find, then yes, for Dr Talbot's sake. But also because I like you, respect you and enjoy spending time with you."
Blair considered him, admitting to herself that there was something different about Oz, that he really didn't fit the mold she'd created for him so long ago. But that didn't mean there could ever be anything between them.
Because he was right. He would only hurt her. Possibly Addy, too.
She forced a smile onto her numb face. "Friends it is. For Dr Talbot's sake."
She wasn't looking for a man in her life, but one could never have too many friends, could one?
Or was she fooling herself that they could ignore the sparks between them and just be friends?
OZ MANNING might be completely undateable, but he was turning out to be a better friend than Blair would have thought.
That night they sat on Dr Talbot's back porch, enjoying the gentle breeze blowing off the Gulf, bringing the scent of the sea with it. The sliding glass door leading into the house was open so they could hear anyone who awakened.
Addy had played with Boo-boo until they'd both run out of energy, talked Dr Talbot's ear off until the man dozed and, when she'd finally sat still, had fallen asleep curled next to him. Stephanie had gone home shortly thereafter, leaving Blair and Oz virtually alone.
They'd been talking for hours.
"I owe so much to Dr Talbot," she told Oz. "When I first came to Madison Memorial, I worked wherever they needed me. My long-term goal was to work in the cardiac unit, but I was so nervous my first day there. I'd heard horror stories about what a bear Dr Talbot was and, of course, I'd been assigned to work directly with him."
Blair smiled at the memory.
"Instead of being a grizzly, he taught me more about cardiac nursing in a week than the entire time I was in school." She'd soaked up every tidbit, every drop of knowledge. "Thanks to his request that I be his personal nurse, I worked hands-on with him from almost the time I graduated from nursing school."
"He's a brilliant teacher." Oz stared into the dark backyard. "The best."
"He insisted I have formal cardiac training." She might have gotten a certificate from the school, but the class hadn't taught her anything Dr Talbot hadn't already shown her. "Whoever permanently takes his place---God, I hate the thought of him never returning to the hospital---I'll be qualified to work with them."
"You won't have problems keeping up with any heart surgeon, Blair. You're an excellent cardiac nurse."
Warmth spread through her at his praise.
"Thanks. If anything new comes up, I'll learn." She looked up at the stars. Why did it feel so easy to tell Oz all these things when just the night before, she had still been professing not to like him? Why was she telling him about herself? Why did doing so feel so right?
Did the label of "friend" really make that much of a difference? Or had this ease been there all along but masked by the barriers thrown between them in order to protect her heart?
"You enjoyed school?"
She nodded. "I love learning. Had it not been for Reesee and Addy, I'd have gone further with my education. Perhaps obtaining a master's or a doctorate degree in acute care. I still may go back at some point."
"Dr T mentioned that you raised your sister."
"In many ways, we raised each other." Blair stared at a tiny plane's light moving across the sky. "My mother died when I was nineteen. I moved out of my dorm, got an apartment and convinced a judge to give me custody of Reesee. She was thirteen at the time."
"There wasn't anyone else to take her in?"
"If you mean, was her father around, the answer is no. He wasn't. My mother was a good woman and a good mother, but she had a tendency to become involved with men who didn't stick around." Just like Blair. "The state was going to put Reesee into foster care. I couldn't bear that. Besides, I wanted her with me. We've always been close."
"You've been a blessing to her."
"As she's been to me." Feeling his gaze on her, she elaborated. "Less than a year after I got custody of Reesee, I gave birth to Addy. Without Reesee's support and unconditional love, I don't know where I'd be."
"You'd be fine, Blair, because you're strong, a survivor."
Yes, that was what she'd often told herself. But she rested her head against Oz's shoulder, just to see how it would feel to lean on someone. A friend.
Silence enveloped them. Blair felt no need to speak, and instead soaked in the sounds around them. Insects. The sea. A car off in the distance. She soaked in Oz's strength rather than feign any false sense of bravado.
She wasn't strong, wasn't brave. She'd simply done what had needed to be done. She'd promised to take care of her sister, and she had. Just as she'd taken care of Addy from the moment she'd discovered the precious life growing inside her body.
Chris had never been a part of Addy's life, had never shared any of Blair's joy or fears. How could he when he'd died mere weeks before Blair had discovered her pregnancy?
Why was she bothering with the past? A total waste of her time. She needed to focus on the future. On getting Reesee through college and making sure Addy had a healthy, normal start in life.
Whatever normal was.
Probably not a household of three females and an adopted grandfather figure who was fighting for his life.
Then there was Oz.
Where did he fit into the picture?
As her new friend?
His kiss had felt more than friendly. Way more. Yet she agreed that a relationship between them would never work. She didn't have time for a relationship. Particularly not with a man who had no plans to stick around. That would be asking to get hurt and wasn't that Oz's reputation with women anyway? To leave them brokenhearted?
They were better off as friends. Besides, being his friend was nice.
She rubbed her cheek against the soft cotton of his T-shirt, breathed in his spicy scent, liked that his arm went around her, cradling her against him, his hand resting low on her back.
Lately, everything came back to Oz in one way or another.
She couldn't escape him at work. She couldn't escape him at home as Addy chatted about him incessantly. She couldn't escape him at Dr Talbot's.
Maybe they could just be friends.
And, if they couldn't, Lord, protect her heart.
"I'm glad you came to visit tonight."
They stood next to Blair's car with Oz holding a sleeping Addy in his arms. Dr Talbot had stirred, and they'd gone into the house so Blair could bid him good-night. Addy had still been asleep curled next to him and hadn't wakened when Oz scooped her up to take her to the car for Blair.
"I enjoyed tonight, too." Blair glanced up at the sky, at the brilliant stars sparkling down at her. She marveled at the world around her. At how tiny she was in the grand scheme of the universe. Yet, in that moment, standing so near Oz with her daughter safely tucked into his arms, she could believe the world evolved around this moment. That they were meant to be. That Oz was the missing link to connect the broken lines of her heart and make her whole.
She'd obviously lost her mind.
"Dr T enjoyed seeing you." Oz smiled down at her. "He always perks up when you and Addy visit."
"We love him," Blair answered simply, wondering if she was imagining that Oz was procrastinating saying good-night. Did friends do that?
"I'll see you in the morning? At the Heart Association center to help Stephanie?" He shifted Addy's sleeping body in his arms.
"We'll be there by nine."
"I'll bring coffee and donuts."
"Sounds good, but better add orange juice for Addy. She has enough energy without coffee."
"Right." Grinning, Oz's gaze dropped to the little girl he held. "She's something else, isn't she? You're blessed, Blair. Addy is a special little girl. Just like her mother."
Why did his compliment settle in her belly and blossom outward, spreading warmth throughout her entire being?
"Thank you." Blair stared at him in the starlight.
Silence stretched.
"I guess you should put her in her seat so I can take her home."
"Yes."
Blair turned, opened her car door and moved aside to let him deposit her sleeping daughter into the car. The interior light shone bright and the open door dinged. Addy stirred, looked at Blair with bleary eyes, then dozed off again while Oz struggled to get the safety straps properly latched.
"Let me." She stepped close and popped the pieces together with the ease of having done so a thousand times.
"Right," Oz said self-derisively at how easily she'd done what he'd struggled with.
She shut the car door, but made no move to go around to the driver's side. She and Oz stood close. Close enough to feel his body heat. Close enough that she fought filling her lungs with his wonderfully male scent.
Friends, she reminded herself again. They were going to be friends.
"I should go."
"You should." He cupped her face, tracing his thumb along her cheek.
Her pulse tapped against her throat. Yes, yes, yes, it shouted.
"Addy," she whispered, not quite sure what else to say, but knowing she needed a reminder of why she should go, of why she and Oz could only be friends, because her body had completely forgotten.
"Right." He let go of her chin and rammed his hands into his pockets. "Good night, Blair. I'll see you in the morning."
Oz balanced the bag of donuts, the tray of coffee cups and juice, and opened the door to the Heart Association with his shoulder.
He'd already pushed Dr Talbot in his wheelchair into the building. Stephanie and Blair had made a fuss, taking over the moment the older man was inside the building. Oz had gone back for their breakfast and to park his SUV.
Stepping inside the building, he took in the scene before him. Addy leaned in, whispering something to Dr T, eliciting a smile from him as only the little girl could. Stephanie watched with longing in her eyes---longing that bespoke of feelings much deeper than friendship. Blair was looking at Oz, but quickly glanced away when their gazes met, pretending she hadn't been watching him.
He'd wanted to kiss her last night. Badly.
But he'd been serious when he told Blair they should only be friends.
If he got involved with Blair, he'd hurt her and then where would that leave them?
No matter how much he wanted Blair Pendergrass---and he did want her---he couldn't have her. Blair was a white picket fences and PTA meetings kind of woman, a mother. He might not be the playboy he had once been, but he was no saint. He didn't plan to commit to a woman. Ever. Manning men shouldn't commit.
They couldn't commit even when they'd vowed to do so.
As long as Oz lived, he'd never do to a woman what his father had done to his mother. Oh, yeah, if he and Blair became involved he'd hurt her, hurt Addy. He suspected he wouldn't forgive himself easily for those transgressions.
"Here, let me take some of that." Stephanie reached for the tray of drinks. "Oz, this coffee smells heavenly. I swear you're an angel."
An angel? He wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it. He was no angel. Far from it.
His gaze met Blair's. Fire burned low in his gut.
Hellfire.
No, he wasn't a saint or an angel.
Far, far from it.
"Please, Mommy, can we go to the beach?"
They'd finished hammering out the fine details of the fund-raiser. Dr T had grown tired. Oz had loaded him into his SUV. The girls had followed them to Dr T's house.
After having been indoors all morning, they sat outside on the back patio. The sun shone. A soft breeze blew in from the sea. It was a gorgeous day.
"The beach?"
"Please." Addy danced around, exhibiting so much barely contained energy Blair didn't have the heart to say no. After all, Addy had been wonderful all morning.
"I'll stay with Ted. You three run along and have fun." Stephanie motioned for Oz to go too.
"Sounds good." Standing, Oz stretched his arms above his head.
Oz and Blair walked the block over to the beach. A well-sunscreened Addy skipped hand-in-hand between them. Once at the beach, they strolled along the edge of the water, picking up shells and checking out anything that happened to wash up along the surf. Mostly seaweed and unfortunate jellyfish.
Addy wiggled her toes in the sand and let the waves wash up around her feet. But she stared at the gently swelling waves longing to plunge straight in---longing Blair wouldn't give in to. Not today, with Oz with them. He saw things others failed to and might see how Addy being in the water turned Blair into a basket case.
She did her best to hide her fear of the sea, to never let that fear bleed over onto her daughter. That didn't mean Blair didn't struggle any time Addy was more than toe deep in the water. Luckily, they hadn't brought suits with them, limiting their excursion to the shallows and saving Blair from having to make explanations.
"Look, Dr Oz." Stooping for a closer look, Addy pointed to a blue jellyfish with short tentacles stretched out along the wet sand.
"Remember not to touch," Blair warned.
"It's breathing." Addy excitedly motioned at the jellyfish.
Sure enough, the sea creature moved.
Eyes huge, Addy tugged on Oz's hand. "We have to save him. We have to."
Oz looked to Blair for help.
"Addy, honey." She moved close to her daughter. "Once he's washed up on the beach like this, there's not a way to save him. He'd die even if we put him back into the water."
"But we have to try," Addy pleaded. She gave Oz her most appealing expression. "We just have to."
Oz wrapped around Addy's little finger right before Blair's eyes.
"Okay, Pipsqueak, let's see what we can find to rescue this guy with because we aren't touching him. You know why not, right?"
Addy nodded. "Because he stings."
They searched the beach for something they could safely move the jellyfish into the water with. A boy about the same age as Addy was building a sand castle several meters away. Running to him, Addy worked her big green-eyed magic. Blair wasn't surprised when he offered his bright orange plastic shovel and pail. Grinning, Addy turned to Oz, proudly showing him her wares, and introduced her new friend.
"This is Pete. He's going to help save the jelly."
Blair smiled at the boy.
"Okay, Addy, Pete, let's see what we have here." Oz examined the plastic shovel and pail. The jellyfish's body would easily fit in the pail, but the tentacles would be problematic if they weren't careful.
"What do you think? Should we shovel him up and carry him to the water, or do we put him in the pail?"
Addy and Pete studied the situation. "The pail," they said in unison, then giggled at their timing.
"I get to save him since it was my idea," Addy pointed out in a very grown-up voice to her new friend.
Standing close, Oz handed Addy the shovel.
Bottom lip tucked between her teeth, she concentrated on using the shovel to carefully scoop up the jellyfish. By going beneath the sand, she managed to maneuver it onto the shovel. But when it came to lifting her cargo, she looked perplexed, trying to figure out how she was going to transfer the jellyfish into the pail without burying the creature in sand.
"Maybe I could carry the shovel directly into the water," Oz suggested, looking relieved at the prospect of taking the shovel from Addy.
Addy and Pete looked at each other in question, then nodded. Oz tossed his cell phone, wallet and keys to Blair. With care, he took the shovel from Addy.
The keys held Oz's warmth, as did the worn leather wallet and phone. Blair slid all three into her shoulder bag, only letting her fingers linger a moment on the items still warm from his body heat, knowing she was sad and pathetic that her fingers had lingered at all.
When the two kids went to follow Oz into the water, Blair held out her hand, restraining them. "Sorry, guys, but Oz has to go into the water alone. The jelly won't mean to, but if you're in the water, he might accidentally sting you."
Addy and Pete sighed their disappointment at not being able to go farther into the water with Oz, but didn't argue. Neither liked the prospect of being stung.
Hands on hips, Addy murmured to her new friend, "He wouldn't really sting us 'cause we saved him and he knows we're his friends."
Pete agreed.
Watching for the right moment to avoid an incoming wave, Oz walked as far into the water as he could without completely soaking his shorts.
Blair could see him contemplating how he was going to put the jelly into the water without the creature washing back toward the shore, possibly stinging him in the process, but most definitely disappointing the two little rescuers. Finally, a larger incoming wave decided for him. Not having time to spare, Oz held the shovel as far away from him as possible and lowered the jellyfish into the water.
The moment the jellyfish was free Oz leaped toward the shore, the wave crashing in around his legs, soaking the hem of his shorts and splattering him completely.
"Dr Oz, you didn't check to make sure he swam away." Addy frowned, hands fisted on her slim little hips. "You need to swim and check on him."
"Oz can't swim out to check on the jelly." Just watching that wave come in around him had closed Blair's throat. She'd known the water wouldn't do more than crash around his legs, but in her mind she'd seen the water grabbing hold and dragging Oz out to sea, claiming him.
"Dr Oz can't swim?" Addy looked disappointed, her lower lip pouty. "Didn't his mommy put him in lessons, too?"
"I can swim, Pipsqueak." Oz took his cell phone, keys and wallet back from Blair's outstretched hands. "I just don't have a suit."
"Addy, the jelly is long gone by now." At least, Blair hoped so. The kids would be upset if their rescuee washed ashore.
Shaking away loose water droplets, Oz grinned at the two expectant children staring up at him with their arms crossed. "Who wants to build a sand castle?"
"I have a sand castle," Pete reminded them. Addy's gaze had shifted to the water, searching for a sign of the jellyfish. Fortunately, the creature hadn't washed back up on shore. Likely he would, though.
Building a sand castle sounded like the perfect distraction.
"I do," Blair said, reaching for Addy's hand. "We love sand castles, don't we, Addy?"
With one last lingering look at the water, Addy turned to her new friend. "Do you want to make another castle with us? I'm a good sand castle maker."
For the next hour they worked on building the world's greatest sand castle.
"I wish I had my camera," Blair mused, surveying their efforts. With the kids' help Oz had dug a moat around the castle and connected it to the neighboring castle Pete's parents had built that was also complete with an outlining moat.
"Yeah," Oz agreed. "Today is one of those memories you want to lock away to pull out on a rainy day."
That summed up her feelings perfectly.
Because Blair knew she'd cherish this day long into her future. That she'd savor the memory long after Oz had gone back to his real life.
Surprising her, Oz pulled out his fancy-looking cell phone and snapped a photo of where she sat next to Addy.
Blair's hands went to her face. "I meant that I wanted a picture of all of you. Not me."
"You should have said so. Too late now." He looked totally unrepentant. His blue eyes met hers, glittered as brightly as the sea. "You want to take my picture with Addy?"
Addy jumped up, sending a spray of sand in every direction. "I want to take a picture, Dr Oz."
"You don't want to be in the picture, Pipsqueak?"
She shook her head, reaching for his phone. "I want to take the picture. Mommy lets me take pictures, don't you, Mommy?"
Before Blair could explain, Oz was showing Addy which button to push and how to focus his phone camera. "What do you want to take a picture of, Pipsqueak?"
"You and Mommy."
Uh-oh. Blair's gaze met Oz's. He just shrugged, sat down in the sand next to her, wrapped his arm around her waist and grinned.
Right then and there Blair decided she'd been in the sun too long. Had to be. Why else would she be having a heatstroke? Her insides had definitely caught fire.
"Smile, Mommy." Addy's lips twisted with great concentration. "Say cheeseburger."
Blair started to force a smile, but Oz's fingers trailed across her ribs, tickling her and eliciting a real laugh at the exact moment Addy snapped the button.
"Oh, that's a good one." Addy stared at the photo she'd taken, then held the phone out for Oz and Blair to see.
Oz looked handsome as ever with a mischievous grin on his face. The photo had captured a lightness in Blair's expression she didn't recall having seen in a long time. The photo made her look young, carefree, really happy. Her gaze had cut to Oz and laughter spilt from her mouth while she squirmed away from him.
They looked like a couple.
"Definitely a keeper," Oz agreed with Addy's assessment, saving the photo to his phone before allowing her to snap a photo of Pete and the sand castles.
Oz's conversation with Latham Duke popped into Blair's head. A keeper. And Oz was a catch-and-release man.
Their gazes met, held. Was he remembering too? Was that why his expression had turned serious?
Looking away, he tweaked Addy's nose. "I'll have the pictures printed for you, Pipsqueak."
Somewhere down the beach someone was cooking out and the scent of hamburgers drifted on the breeze.
Blair's stomach growled.
Oz looked at where she sat and grinned. "Hungry?"
Had her belly really just growled that loud? Blair burst out laughing. "A little."
Standing, she brushed the sand from her shorts.
"I am a lot." He reached for Blair, letting her pull him to his feet. His hand lingered on hers, his thumb tracing over her flesh. His gaze danced mischievously, his lips twitched, but his hand fell away.
Dozens of emotions roared to life inside her, growling in protest much louder than her stomach had. Unfortunately, the emotion she recognized most was loss at Oz's hand no longer touching hers. Also, sadness that nothing could ever happen between them. They were too different. Not only that but, sooner or later, Oz would leave to go back to Rochester and his playboy life.
And they were friends.
"Come on, Pipsqueak." He tugged on Addy's pigtail. "It's time for us to feed your mom."
Addy hated to say goodbye to her new friend, but she finally waved to Pete and his parents.
When they arrived back at Dr Talbot's, Oz popped turkey burgers onto the grill. Stephanie, Addy and Blair worked in the kitchen putting together whatever they could find to go with burgers.
When the burgers finished cooking, Oz placed the platter on the picnic table.
"Come and get 'em," he called with a cowboy twang, despite the fact they all stood within a few feet of him.
Addy giggled at the goofy way he'd said it. Blair just rolled her eyes.
Stephanie filled a plate for Dr Talbot, but he picked at his food more than he ate. Stephanie coddled him, fussing over him with great ado, even offering to cut up his food and feed him. He gave her a dirty look. Otherwise, he smiled and seemed to enjoy the evening, although fatigue was written all over his face.
Other than for doctor appointments, he rarely left his house these days. With the trip to the Heart Association this morning, spending the afternoon with Stephanie, and now their cookout, he'd had a long day.
Oz stepped onto the back porch and sat down in the lawn swing with Blair. He'd been playing with Addy and Boo-boo, but the dog now rested at Dr Talbot's feet.
"What were you so serious about when I came over here?"
"I was thinking about Dr Talbot."
Oz's gaze settled where Dr Talbot sat with Addy curled in the crook of his arm, reading him a story more from memory than ability to interpret all the words. "He's a grown man, Blair. Whatever he decides, we'll support him. It's his decision to make, not ours."
"But---"
"I don't want him to die any more than you do."
Blair flinched at the anger in his voice, but he didn't seem to notice.
"There's no guarantee the Xabartan would work. Don't you think I'd have him in Rochester if there was? But there isn't. There's no way of knowing if he'd have complications and die sooner." Seeming to realize he'd lost his cool, Oz inhaled deeply, sent her an apologetic look. "Whether or not we ever find out is his decision. Not ours. Let up on him, Blair."
"There's no guarantee the Xabartan wouldn't work. He should try." He had so many reasons to want to live, so many people who wanted him as part of their lives. "He has to try, Oz. He has to."
His expression softening, Oz reached for her hand and gave a comforting squeeze. "You can't put pressure on him to do what you want, rather than what he wants. We have to honor his wishes."
Blair's gaze dropped to where Oz held her hand. Part of her wanted to pull away, to make sure no one noticed. She didn't want to answer awkward questions. Did friends hold hands like this? But Dr Talbot and Stephanie didn't have to see her and Oz holding hands to know something had changed between them.
Something had changed.
From the moment he'd kissed her in the hospital hallway, the moment they'd declared themselves friends, the way Blair looked at Oz had changed.
Or maybe it hadn't.
Maybe she'd just quit fighting the inevitable.
She was attracted to Oz.
Not that she was crazy enough to act on it.
She wasn't. She'd worked too long and too hard putting together a good life for her family to risk it on a man like Oz.
Only, since coming to Alabama this trip, Oz hadn't seemed nearly as bad as she'd painted him and she kept forgetting he wasn't a man to trust with her heart.
Amidst a bevy of laughter, Addy chased a revived Boo-boo around the backyard. Blair caught her daughter in her arms, sweeping her little body off the ground and tickling her until Addy begged for mercy.
His eyes never straying far from Blair, Oz moved a lawn chair near Dr T's wheelchair. "Stephanie's still inside," he told his friend. "She had a few phone calls to make."
"Are you sleeping with Blair?" His friend's gaze didn't waver. Dr T had never beaten around the bush. Getting straight to the heart of a matter was one of the things Oz admired about his friend. Usually.
"No."
Dr T eyed him for a minute, then rephrased his question. "Have you had sex with Blair?"
Oz grinned. He couldn't help himself. Dr T in the role of overbearing father seemed inappropriate when the man had once patted Oz's back for his sexual prowess. Perhaps that had been for an outraged Selma's benefit. Dr T had loved to tease his wife. Selma had threatened that someday Oz's womanizing ways would catch up with him and he'd meet a nice girl and settle down.
Oz's gaze shifted to Blair. Selma had been right about one thing. He had met a "nice girl," but he had no plans to settle down. Ever. Why would he do that to someone he liked?
He liked Blair. A lot. Too much.
"No. Nor do we have any plans to have sex. We're friends."
That was all they would ever be. Unfortunately.
"Blair's not like the women you date."
"She's not," Oz conceded. "Which explains why we're not dating."
Blair was different. Better. Addictive. He wanted her more than any woman. Which scared him a little. Blair's lack of experience made her no match for him. He could have her if he wanted her. He knew that. But she'd regret it afterwards. So would he.
He couldn't---wouldn't---do that to her.
"You're the first man she's let close since Chris."
Addy's father. God, he was curious about the man who'd once held Blair's heart. He was tempted to ask Dr T what he knew, but he held his tongue. Being Blair's friend didn't give him the right to pry into her past.
"Women like Blair aren't the type to play the field. Addy's father hurt her deeply. Now, she's put her whole heart into loving that little girl." Dr Talbot's gaze went to where Blair played with Addy.
Blair knelt beside her daughter, petting the dog. As if sensing his gaze, she glanced up, smiled tentatively, vulnerability and something more shining in her eyes.
Something more that was meant for him.
Desire?
A tightness Oz couldn't label constricted his chest.
"Hurting Blair is the last thing I'd want," he choked out. "Which is why we're just friends and why we'll stay just friends."
THE following Friday morning, Oz stopped by the waiting room to check on Georgia Donelson's daughter prior to going in to the cardiac surgical suite to operate on her mother's heart.
The young woman sat in a chair, hunkered down as if she carried the weight of the world on her thin shoulders. She stared straight ahead, yet he doubted she saw anything.
Memories of sitting in a waiting room, waiting on news of his father, news that hadn't been good, washed over Oz. Only Dr T had been there for him during that difficult time. No one else had understood. No one else had cared to.
"Lacey?"
"Yes? Is my mother okay? Did something happen?" the tired-looking young woman gasped, knowing enough time hadn't passed for the surgery to be complete.
"She's being prepped for surgery as we speak."
"You're the surgeon?" Worry etched her face at the unexpected visit from him.
"Yes, I'm Dr Manning."
Lacey's already pale face blanched further. He hadn't come out here to increase her stress. Quite the opposite.
"Your mother is doing great. I expect a good outcome from her surgery. She's strong."
Lacey nodded, not looking convinced.
"If you want to wait in your son's hospital room, I'll call the moment I'm finished replacing the valve."
"You're sure?"
"Positive. It'll be several hours before I'll finish, but I will call you the moment I leave the surgical suite. There's no reason for you to sit here all day. Go wait in your son's room. You'll know something just as quickly there as you will if you wait here."
Lacey nodded. "Okay. If you're sure, I'd rather wait with Caden." Still looking hesitant, she bit her lower lip. "Just don't forget to call me the moment you know something."
"I won't."
Lacey stood and headed toward the door. That was when Oz noticed Blair. His breath caught in his throat. Wearing navy scrubs, she spoke to Lacey, gave the girl a hug, then turned to him. And smiled.
If he'd thought he couldn't breathe before, he was totally hypoxemic now.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, joining her.
"Apparently the same thing you are. Checking on Lacey."
"I didn't want her to sit here all day when she needs to be with her son."
Blair nodded. "That's exactly what I thought. I came to tell her I'd call the moment the surgery ended so she could come back to the cardiac unit then."
"Great minds think alike." Oz smiled.
"Apparently we do, too."
Natural and unguarded, her smile literally stole his breath.
"Are you implying we don't have great minds?" He placed his hand on her back to guide her toward the cardiac unit so they could scrub.
"You do, Dr Manning. There's no doubt about that. As for me---" she shrugged "---well, I get by."
Oz wanted to ask what she meant, but Kanesha stepped around the corner. A pencil-thin black brow arched high when she saw Oz's hand on Blair's back.
Not meeting the nursing director's amused gaze, Oz let his hand fall away in the hope of protecting Blair's reputation from gossip, and headed into surgery.
Georgia Donelson's pulmonic valve repair had gone without a hitch. The woman was now in ICU recovering. Oz at her side, Blair went to the pediatric floor and told Lacey the good news.
Although relieved the day had gone so well, Blair was nonetheless grateful when her shift came to an end and she stood in the break room, gathering her things.
"I just don't see how I can, Reesee," she said into her cell phone, glancing at her watch as she clocked out. "I'm supposed to sit with Dr Talbot tomorrow night so Oz can go out with friends. This is the first time in weeks that he's made any plans, so I hate to cancel on him." She'd been surprised when he'd asked her about sitting with Dr Talbot, had wondered if he'd wanted her to know of his social plans. Was he going on a date? she'd wanted to ask, but had bitten her tongue. She had no right to ask about his personal life. "Plus, I have Addy."
Reesee wasn't giving up easily. Her sister never did.
Blair sighed. "I know that it's not every day you come across second-row concert tickets, but it's just too short notice. I want to go. You know I want to go. But I can't."
"Stephanie is planning to visit with Dr T tomorrow night, too," Oz said from behind Blair, causing her to turn. "I'm sure she wouldn't mind staying with him until I return."
What was he doing in the break room? She'd figured he'd already left the hospital.
"I can watch Addy for you," he added, surprising Blair.
Oz babysit Addy? Her heart skipped a beat. She was so particular about whom she left her daughter with. There was Reesee, the neighbor lady who helped watch Addy prior to her starting school, a lady from church and Stephanie on the rare occasion, and that was it. She'd never left her daughter with anyone else other than schoolteachers.
Addy adored Oz, so that wouldn't be a problem. But to watch her late into the night? Why did the thought make Blair's stomach twist into knots?
"That is, if you trust me," he added, probably thinking of Addy's cut knee.
"It's not that." She put her hand over the phone's mouthpiece. "You don't have to watch her."
"I know, but like you said, it's not every day your sister gets offered second row tickets to see the concert of the year!" He grinned. "You should go. Addy will be fine."
Blair was torn. She wanted to say yes, but could she? Oz wouldn't ever intentionally hurt Addy, but what did he know about taking care of rambunctious five-year-olds? Plus, he'd asked her to sit with Dr T so he could have a rare free evening.
"I can't impose on your plans like that."
"My plans are nothing that Addy couldn't go to with me. Just an evening out with some friends."
So he wasn't going on a date. Why did that relieve the dull ache that had settled in her chest when he'd mentioned his plans?
"Blair, I can hear what he's saying," Reesee pointed out. "You have to go. Tell him yes right now," she demanded through the phone. "It's been forever since we had a night out together, just you and me. You love music. For once, just let loose and have some fun just for you. Say yes because I'm not taking no for an answer."
Her sister was right. She worked, cared for Dr T, worked on the fund-raiser and rarely did anything for the fun of it. Usually, when she did, that fun centered around Addy. How long had it been since she'd done something just for her? Just because it was what she wanted to do?
Blair eyed Oz, wishing her heart didn't jump so. "You're sure you don't mind watching her?"
A mischievous look twinkled in his eyes. "If you don't say yes, I'm going to ask your sister if I can go with her. For her personal virtue, you'd best tell her yes."
Having heard him, Reesee laughed. "I'd take him, too. Addy told me he's hot."
Blair's face heated. Addy had said that? Dear heavens, where had her daughter heard that expression? At school? Or from her aunt Reesee?
"Gee, you'd best count me in. I can't have Oz sullying your virtue."
But the way he was looking at her made Blair wonder if she wished he'd sully hers.
The smile on Blair's face made Oz's head spin. When she pressed the end button on her phone and slid it back into her scrub top pocket, she glowed.
"You enjoy the music that much?" he asked, unable to stop smiling in return.
Her green gaze widened. "Don't you?"
"As much as the next guy, I suppose." Oz leaned against the break room wall. God, she was beautiful. Sexy. Amazing. Intelligent. Totally off-limits. "I like his early stuff best."
"Anything he sings is phenomenal. He just has that raspy voice that pulls me right in." Blair grabbed her personal items. "Are you going to be at Dr Talbot's tonight?"
"Yep. Stephanie's coming by later, but it'll just be me and him for dinner. Unless you and Addy plan to stop by."
Why did he hope she'd say they would?
For that matter, why had he just agreed to babysit Blair's daughter? True that the little girl had him wrapped around her little finger, but offering to babysit crossed a line Oz didn't cross.
Ordinarily.
So why had he?
Hadn't he asked Stephanie to sit with Dr T and Addy so he could ask Blair to go out with him and his friends? So why had he offered to take Addy with him? Why had he changed his plans like that? To babysit? Him? Mr Playboy Confirmed Bachelor and happily so. Babysitting.
Why did he suspect he'd babysit a dozen nights just to see that smile on Blair's face?
"Of course we'll be by. I want to spend as much time with Dr Talbot as possible."
He understood. Dr T looked weaker and weaker each day. Oz suspected the older man wouldn't be with them much longer if something didn't give soon. He just hoped his friend lived long enough to attend the fund-raiser, to see how many people turned out to show their love and support.
"Addy and I made a banana pudding last night." Dr T's favorite dessert. "Do you need me to bring anything else?"
"Nope. Where are you parked?" Oz followed Blair from the break room.
Blair's face pinched. "Actually, Reesee has my car today. Hers wouldn't start this morning and I let her take mine to Birmingham. I caught a taxi."
She'd taken a cab?
"You should have called me." He pushed the elevator down button. "I'd have picked you up this morning."
"It wasn't that big a deal."
"I'll drive you home."
He could tell she wanted to argue, but then she smiled. "Thanks. That's a friendly thing to do."
Friendly.
Yep, that was all he was feeling toward Blair.
Oz brought Blair to her apartment building, went with her to get Addy from her neighbor's and hung out while they got ready to go to Dr T's.
While Blair changed out of her uniform and took a quick shower, Addy showed him her schoolwork, read him a story and told him about her day.
Warning bells sounded in his head. Warning bells that said the scene was way too cozy, way too white picket fence and domestic for Oz Manning.
But Addy's adoring eyes as she snuggled in his arms had him ignoring the warnings, had him breathing in the scent of her shampoo and listening to her jump from one subject to the next with lightning speed.
Of course, focusing on Addy allowed him to ignore the fact that Blair was just down the hallway. Showering. Because he definitely needed to ignore what knowing that did to him.
Oz tugged on his collar, mentally giving himself a cold shower, and took the book Addy had just run off to collect for them to read together. Reading about a patchwork elephant sounded like just the thing to keep his thoughts off Blair.
Or at least distract him enough that he could pretend to.
When they were ready, he drove them to Dr Talbot's. Oz and Blair cooked dinner together while Addy entertained Dr T. While the pasta boiled, Oz chopped chicken breasts into strips. When done, he grilled the strips. Blair made a gallon of sweet tea, then spread garlic and butter on toast.
"Look out." Oz threw a noodle against the side of the cabinet, purposely missing Blair by inches.
She jumped back, laughing. "What's that for?"
"Don't you watch the cooking networks?" Stirring the ladle in the boiling pasta, he grinned.
"Um...no," Blair denied, eyeing him oddly. "Do you?"
"I've watched all kinds of television since moving in with Dr T. Whatever catches his eye, I watch." Oz sighed melodramatically. "He likes the cooking network. Lucky me."
"You learned to throw noodles at the cabinets from the cooking network?" Her brow arched suspiciously. "Sounds to me like something a little boy would make up to cover for being naughty."
He raised his fingers in a scout's salute and winked. "On my honor. See." He pointed to where the noodle stuck to the cabinet. "When the noodle sticks, it's done."
"Heart surgeon. Babysitter. Noodle thrower," Blair teased. Her eyes raked over him, then returned to his, searching, asking for answers to who he really was, looking as if she'd like to peel away the layers to see the man beneath. To see the man he never let anyone see. "What other secret talents are you hiding, Dr Manning?"
Oz got the strangest urge to show Blair. To demonstrate every talent he had to the fullest of his capabilities.
Which was crazy.
Wasn't he just like his father? Didn't he forever bore with women and move on to the next? He didn't want commitment or to have a person's happiness depend upon him. He would never do to a woman what his father had done to his mother. Especially not Blair. She deserved better than a man like him.
"Oz?" Lips parted, she smiled tentatively up at him, her gaze dropping to his mouth.
She wanted him to kiss her.
If only he could without her paying the price.
"Here." He shoved the Alfredo sauce bowl at her. "Mix this."
She looked at the bowl. Looking confused, she reached for the sauce. Her fingers collided with his.
Tension sizzled back and forth.
Damn it. He didn't need this.
Oz pulled back, but only managed to slosh hot water, splattering his finger. He wasn't sure if the burn was from the water or Blair's touch. Regardless, he yelped in pain.
"You burned yourself." She grabbed his hand and marched him the few steps to the sink to run cold water over his fingers.
Treating him like a child, she held his hand under the water for several silent minutes. Oz stared at the intent expression on her face, the concern in her eyes, absorbed the gentleness in her touch when she examined his fingers.
"It may sting for a bit, but it's only a first-degree burn. You'll be all right." She lifted his finger to her mouth and placed a kiss on the burn.
He swallowed. Hard. From the moment he'd met Blair he hadn't been all right. Not really. She'd always made him unsteady, a bit undeserving, perhaps even a tad rebellious. It was why he'd always brought a woman with him on his trips to visit Dr T. Because he'd been attracted to Blair, but had known that attraction was futile and wouldn't end well if he acted on it.
He still knew that.
That didn't keep his body from responding to her tender touch.
She dropped his hand, her gaze meeting his in embarrassment at what she'd done. "Sorry, I---"
Oz didn't plan his next move, would have denied that he was going to kiss her if someone had asked. But staring into Blair's eyes, seeing such vivid emotions flash in the green depths, seeing passion---for him---he couldn't resist, forgot all the reasons he was wrong for Blair. He lowered his head and kissed her full on the mouth, pressing her against the sink.
Damn, she tasted good.
Much better than pasta. Much better than the delicious banana pudding he'd snuck a bite of earlier.
He kissed her until he was breathless. Until she clung to him, kissing him with matching desperation. Until he knew he had to quit or he was going to lift her onto the counter and have her. Right then, right there.
Kissing Blair was one thing. Making love to her was something else altogether.
She brushed her finger over her swollen bottom lip. "A simple thank-you would have sufficed."
Oz didn't answer, just went back to their dinner.
Looked like they were having blackened chicken Alfredo.
Late the following night, Addy's little arms reached for Oz. "Night, Dr Oz." She stifled a yawn. "I love you."
With only the slightest hesitation, Oz bent and hugged Addy, accepting her kiss. "Night, Pipsqueak." He tucked the quilt in around her. "Sweet dreams."
Addy fell asleep almost immediately. No wonder. They'd had a great time out on his friend's sailboat. Addy had loved the sea, loved pretending they were pirates in search of treasure. She'd chattered nonstop from the time they'd gone out to the time she'd slipped on her pink pajamas from her overnight bag.
Sitting down on the edge of the bed, he stared at the sleeping little girl, battling another moment of nostalgia.
Not that he recalled ever being tucked into bed or having stories read to him. But spending the evening with Addy, feeling her genuine hug, was nice.
He'd taken her out to eat with friends, a few of whom had ribbed him about robbing the cradle. Oz hadn't cared. He'd enjoyed his time with the little girl much more than if he'd taken a date.
Unless, perhaps, that date had been Addy's mother.
But he couldn't date Blair, he reminded himself for what seemed like the millionth time.
Not when he couldn't give her what she'd ultimately want.
He didn't do commitment.
Hadn't his father offered commitment to his mother? Just look at how pitifully that had turned out. They'd hurt each other over and over. They'd hated each other. When Oz's father had died, his mother hadn't even attended Oswald Manning's funeral.
Nor was she able to see her son without reminding him how like his father he was. In looks and personality.
Was that how he wanted Blair to view him? As an incurable playboy? Hell, she probably already thought of him in that way. In the name of friendship she'd opened up to him, treated him differently, and he liked her trust. Was he willing to compromise their relationship by pushing for more when he knew more would ultimately destroy everything?
Could he ignore their kiss?
He liked Blair, was attracted to her, and would like to pursue a relationship with her. Only, he wasn't sure how to define relationship.
In the past, his relationships consisted of his being totally upfront with the women he dated, telling them he wasn't interested in commitment or long-term. That they'd have fun for however long the attraction lasted and then they'd go their separate ways. No fuss, no mess. Crass, perhaps, but his honesty had worked and his conscience had never bothered him.
The thought of delivering Blair that same sex-without-strings spiel pricked his conscience.
She deserved better than a man only willing to have a good time today and leave her tomorrow.
His gaze dropped to Addy's innocent face.
Blair had already had a man do that to her once.
He reached out, pushed a lock of Addy's golden curls away from her cheek. She could be an angel dropped straight from heaven. No wonder Blair fought so hard to protect her from the world. With the fierce protectiveness that filled him, he could only imagine the lengths Blair would go to protect Addy.
He admired the great job she'd done raising the little girl, for providing a stable home for her sister, for being a friend a dying man could count on till his last breath. Blair Pendergrass was a woman who committed to those she cared about, no questions asked, no whining about what might have been.
Did he have any right to expect her to compromise her values to give a lost man like him a chance at redemption?
Midnight had come and long gone when Reesee and Blair returned from Birmingham. Despite the late hour, energized excitement flowed through Blair's veins. The concert had been fabulous. Their seats had been close enough to feel as if they could reach out and touch "The Boss."
They'd certainly given it their best shot.
Blair pulled out her cell phone to call Oz.
"She's fine," Reesee insisted before Blair had punched the first number. "Oz said to leave her with him rather than dragging her out in the middle of the night. Do it."
Blair shook her head. She'd never spent the night away from her daughter. Never.
"I don't want her to be a bother."
Her sister snorted. "Most likely she's been asleep for hours. You'll only wake her and Oz if you call. Besides, she's not a bother. Dr Talbot adores her and apparently Oz does, too." Reesee looked at her from the passenger seat. "What gives? You two an item?"
Careful to keep her eyes on the road, Blair shook her head. "We're just friends."
"Right," Reesee responded with a healthy dose of sisterly sarcasm. "Friends."
"We are."
"Uh-huh. Sure you are," Reesee teased. "Have you kissed him?"
Blair stared straight ahead.
Scooting forward in her seat as far as her safety belt would allow, Reesee squealed in glee. "Omigosh, you have. You've kissed Oz. That's wonderful."
"No," Blair denied, wanting to tell her sister everything and yet afraid to give voice to the burgeoning emotions threatening to burst her chest when she thought of Oz. "It isn't."
"Why not? You've been single too long and Oz seems like a nice enough guy."
"How can you say that? Before tonight, you'd never even met him."
"If you'd invite him over we could fix my not knowing him very well." Reesee twisted farther in her seat to stare at Blair. "You have to admit he's great with Dr Talbot, great with Addy, and it's obvious you like him."
Reesee was right. Blair did like him.
After all her huff and puff, she'd fallen for him.
Fallen in a not just friends way.
Which scared her.
If she was going to fall, Oz wasn't the kind of man she should fall for. A known heartbreaker. A man who women threw themselves at. A man who was a natural flirt. A man who'd be the first to admit he was commitment-phobic and enjoyed playing the field.
"There's nothing between us."
"Maybe you should remedy that, too, because there should be."
Blair shot her sister a scowl.
"It's been six years since Chris died. You've locked your heart away and I understand that. Sort of. But if you like Oz, why not give the guy a chance?"
"Oz isn't the kind of man who goes for relationships," Blair admitted, knowing she spoke the truth.
Her sister shrugged as if it were a no-brainer. "Then why not have a whatever he does go for?"
"Reesee Pendergrass!" Blair almost swerved the car off the road. "I can't believe you said that."
Her sister snickered. "Why? Because I'm still a child in your eyes? Sorry, sis, but nineteen is old enough to know you're lonely."
"I'm not lonely. I have you and Addy. And Dr Talbot."
"It's not the same as having a man in your life. You're young, Blair. Gorgeous, smart, witty. You're a fabulous mom to Addy, but it's okay for you to live a little, too."
"But..." Blair stopped.
She didn't want to give voice to what she'd been about to say.
But she might get hurt.
Was she so afraid of being hurt again that she'd locked her heart away? That she'd refused to acknowledge Oz as anything more than a friend despite knowing the electricity zapping between them was more than just friendly?
Was fear why she'd avoided him for years, telling herself she was avoiding him because she didn't like him, that he was like Chris?
If so, what did that say about her?
And just how far was she willing to go to confront that fear?
Blair dropped Reesee off at their apartment. Despite her sister's assurances that Addy was fine or Oz would have called, Blair insisted upon going to Dr Talbot's. Perhaps she was overly protective, but she couldn't bear the thought of not kissing Addy good-night. What if she woke during the night and Blair wasn't there?
She'd go to Dr Talbot's, check on Addy, then crawl into bed beside her daughter. Just the thought of curling up next to her warm little body, breathing in her baby shampoo scent, made Blair smile.
Going had nothing to do with Oz. Nothing to do with her realization that she'd been afraid of feeling the things he made her feel. Nothing.
Using the key Dr Talbot had given her months ago, Blair let herself into the beach house. Setting her bag onto the table in the hallway, she snuck up the stairs as quietly as she could.
Addy would be in what her daughter called the "mermaid room." The mythically decorated room was where she and Blair always slept when they stayed over---something they'd not done since Oz had moved in.
The door stood open. Blair peeped inside. The ceramic mermaid on a rock lamp on the bedside table cast a soft glow on the pastel blue walls. On the bed, Oz lay on top of the covers with Addy beneath the covers, snoring softly and curled into the crook of his arm. She looked completely relaxed, at peace. Oz's chest rose and fell in even breaths.
Longing caught flame in Blair's belly, spreading warmth throughout her body, filling her with wants she'd long denied, wants that involved Addy having a father, someone to love her and care for her the way Blair did.
Chris had died before Blair had known of Addy's existence, but during her pregnancy she'd still dreamed of her daughter having a family. One that involved a mommy and a daddy.
She hadn't dreamed of that in years, had been content with the life they'd forged.
But she'd never witnessed her little girl tucked safely in a man's arms.
They looked...content.
As if they belonged together.
As if they belonged in Blair's dreams.
Her daughter had grown to care so much for Oz and the feeling was mutual.
Moisture pricked Blair's eyes, blurring her vision.
Reesee had been right. Addy was fine. Oz had taken good care of her. She should have trusted him, should have known he'd look out for her daughter, just as he looked out for Dr Talbot.
Despite what she'd thought she knew about him, Oz Manning was a good man.
One Dr Talbot trusted completely.
One Addy trusted completely.
One who deserved Blair's trust.
For the first time in years, Blair found herself wanting to give that trust and see if it might grow into something more.
Not wanting to disturb them, she flicked off the lamp light, turned the night-light on and pushed the door almost closed. She'd sleep on the sofa.
She'd barely made it back down the stairs before a heavy-eyed Oz appeared.
"I didn't know you were here." He sat close to her on the sofa, raking his fingers through his golden hair. "Or that you were planning to come here tonight." His gaze dropped to her concert T-shirt and he gave a sleepy grin. "How was the concert?"
Unable to suppress her pleasure at seeing him, Blair told him, enthusing over the performance and how she and Reesee had danced and sung along.
"Sounds like you had fun. I'm glad you went." He leaned his head back against the sofa, yawning. "Your daughter is something else, Blair."
"Yes, she is." Had she just slid closer to him? "She's the most precious part of my life. Did she give you any problems?"
"Only that she's smart as a whip and kept me on my toes. I swear nothing slips past her." Rubbing his hand over his face, he stretched and Blair slid another inch his way. "She soaked in every word, everything I said and did tonight."
Blair nodded. Addy was a sponge. "I'm amazed at how smart she is."
Hair ruffled, eyelids heavy with recent sleep, he grinned. "Not that you're biased."
"Just a little." His body heat lured her to curl into his arms the way her daughter had been. "I worry I'm somehow not giving her everything she needs and she's going to suffer for it. I try so hard to be all she needs."
Oz wrapped his arm around her and hugged her close. "You do a great job."
Oh, heaven. His arms felt so good. His solid chest beneath her cheek felt even better.
She snuggled closer, slipping her arm between the sofa and his lower back. She pressed her palm into the curve of his back, felt the coiled strength in his muscles. "I often wonder."
"Being a single parent can't be easy. Hell, being a parent period isn't easy, single or otherwise." His fingers traced over her free arm. "You shouldn't have to do this alone, Blair."
"Addy's father died before she was born." She gave the same answer she'd been giving for years, the same answer she gave to anyone who asked. Giving that answer to Oz seemed inadequate.
"What happened?"
Blair moistened her lips. She suspected Oz knew Addy's father had died. "Chris died about a month before I found out I was pregnant with Addy."
"How did he die?"
Blair's throat tightened. She didn't want to talk about Chris. Not with Oz. Not with anyone. She'd never spoken of what had happened. Not ever.
She wasn't sure she could.
Blair rubbed her cheek against the comfort she found in Oz's arms, praying she'd somehow absorb his strength. "He had an accident."
Oz's hold on Blair tightened. He hadn't a right to ask about Addy's father, but the question had slipped out. He blamed his slip on the dream he'd awakened from. A dream where he and Blair were a family with Addy. Where he'd been Addy's father. Blair had been his wife. He should look at the dream as a nightmare, but instead a warm, fuzzy nostalgia had turned his brain to cotton.
Probably he was still half-asleep, and in the light of the day he'd cringe, face life's realities.
He wasn't a permanent part of Blair's life. He had no right to know the intimate details of her past.
But he wanted to know.
He wanted to know everything about her. Every little detail that made her tick. Every little detail of the man whom she'd once loved so he could figure out what had made the guy worthy of her love, worthy of the precious little girl sleeping upstairs.
"He went sailing." Blair's voice was barely above a whisper.
Sailing? Foreboding filled Oz. He'd never heard how Chris had died, had never known any of the details.
Sailing?
Oh, hell.
He'd taken Addy sailing, had let her hold the wheel as they'd watched the sunset. She'd seemed thrilled by the trip. He hadn't seen any signs of grief or fear, but hell, what did he know about kids? Other than Addy, he hadn't spent time around anyone underage since he was underage.
Then again, her father had died before she was born.
"There were warnings of an incoming storm, but that never stopped Chris. He thought he was invincible." She drew in a deep breath, appeared torn with memories. "He responded to another ship's distress flare. He was trying to get the family moved over to his boat, but the two kids ended up in the water. The waves had gotten high. The wind was nasty. Even with their life jackets, they didn't stand a chance of making it back to the boat. Chris went in after them." She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, opened them and continued. "He managed to get one of the kids, a little boy, to his boat, where his parents were able to lift him to safety." She shuddered. "Chris and the girl didn't make it. There wasn't anything anyone could do."
He wrapped his arm tighter around her, kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry, Blair."
Her pain was palpable.
The man had died saving a kid's life and trying to save another.
"He died a hero." No wonder Blair had loved him.
"A hero." Blair's lips pursed. "Yes, Chris died a hero."
The way she said the words made Oz think there was more to the story than what Blair was saying. But he wouldn't push. Not with her already looking so exposed, with her body trembling against him.
"He wasn't alone on his sailboat."
"Not alone?"
"He was with his wife," she confessed in a hoarse whisper.
Oz pulled back, staring at her in surprise. "His wife?"
"Yes."
"Addy's father was married?" Surely he'd somehow misunderstood? "You were having an affair with a married man?"
That didn't fit with his image of Blair. Didn't fit with the image she'd painted of Addy's father.
Tense against him, Blair nodded. "I know that makes me a bad person. I've never denied that. But I honestly believed he was divorced." She swallowed hard. "He wasn't. When he died, I was devastated. I'm not sure which hurt the most---that he was gone or that he'd been lying to me all along. I loved him so much I thought I wanted to die, too."
He held her, let her take her time before continuing.
"Like a fool, I went to his funeral. His wife publicly humiliated me in front of his friends and family. His wife." She spat the words from her pursed lips. "She denied me the right to attend Chris's funeral. I only wanted to say goodbye. When I broke down, she..." Blair quit speaking, buried her face in her hands. "She had the right to send me away. I know she did, that she was hurting, and I shouldn't have gone. I understand that now."
Oz had no right to judge her. Addy's father was another story altogether. The man's dishonesty had put the women in his life in a horrible situation. His wife and Blair. "Of course you wanted to pay your last respects to his memory. That was only natural, Blair."
She wiped at her eyes. "Later, when I discovered my pregnancy, I told his parents. I'd never met them outside of that day at the funeral, but Chris was an only child. I thought they had a right to know." Raw pain bled from every word. "They told me they wanted nothing to do with me---" Blair's voice broke "---or my bastard child."
Oh, hell. Oz's fingers curled into a fist. How could anyone have been so cruel? Especially when they were talking about the child of their recently killed son? Their grandchild?
When they were talking about Blair's child?
"I think they were worried I planned to go after child support." Blair wiped at her eyes.
"They were idiots," Oz assured her. "Addy is a beautiful child, inside and out. Any man would be proud to call her his kid."
She looked up at him with red-rimmed eyes. "Would Chris have?"
Vulnerability bled from her soft question. Vulnerability that hinted at a need for validation, a need to know that she wasn't the bad person she'd been cast.
"He hadn't divorced his wife. He'd told me he was divorced, Oz, that he loved me. I was in love with him, and I was nothing more than a booty call."
"You can't know that."
"I do." Blair gave an embittered laugh. "If I'd been the only one, I might believe he loved me, that he'd have really filed for divorce when he discovered my pregnancy." She looked away, clearly embarrassed. "I wasn't. According to his wife, he had several women on the side, but they had enough class not to show up at his funeral." She sniffled. "I don't know how many, just that I wasn't anything special."
"He was an idiot." A complete and total idiot. How could a man have Blair's love and cheat on her? If Blair loved him, he'd...Hold up. What was he thinking?
He wouldn't do anything.
Because he didn't do love.
Didn't do commitment.
He also didn't deceive women the way Addy's father had deceived Blair.
"I'm sorry he hurt you."
"Me, too." She forced a smile to her face. "His betrayal destroyed my feelings for him, but no matter how hurt I was, I can't regret what happened. Without Chris, I wouldn't have Addy. She's worth everything."
Oz had the uncanny desire to pound his fist into Chris's face, into Chris's parents' faces. Into anyone's face who hurt Blair.
She was the most decent person he knew and that decency had been trampled on. She'd been through so much, yet, even now, she'd wiped away her tears and wore a smile on her lovely face. She saw the silver lining in her pain, cherished the little girl who must be a constant reminder of everything she'd been through.
"You're an amazing woman, Blair." Oz hugged her, kissed the top of her head. "Amazing."
"I've never told anyone." She looked at him in awe. Looked at him in a way that made him feel like puffing out his chest and strutting around like some crazy bird doing a mating ritual.
"Not even Reesee or Dr Talbot. They probably figured a lot of it out on their own, but I've never told anyone." She laughed a little self-consciously. "I thought admitting to what Chris had done would be hard, that I'd be embarrassed at how foolish I was to believe his lies." She placed her palm against Oz's face, stared at him with a sparkle in her eyes that made him feel like a bug under a magnifying glass.
A sparkle---he didn't know how else to describe the way she looked at him. Her eyes glittered like multifaceted emeralds.
"But I don't." She caressed his cheek. "Not with you."
Oz tried not to wince, wasn't sure he was successful.
More than anything, he didn't want to hurt Blair the way Addy's father had.
He'd rather end things now than add to the heavy burden her heart carried, thanks to the jerk she'd once fallen in love with.
The way she was looking at Oz as if she was falling for him. Had any woman ever looked at him like that?
He didn't think so. Fear and disbelief battled for pole position within him.
No matter what, Blair absolutely could not fall for him.
No way did he want to be responsible for another person's heart. He'd seen the power his father had wielded over his mother's heart, had seen the devastation that power wrought.
Blair's heart needed to stay far away from the likes of him.
In the end, he'd hurt her as Addy's father had. Not by lying to her, but by his inability to commit to one woman. His entire life, he'd never committed to anyone. What did that say about him?
Just what he'd known all along---that he was his father's son.
"I'm leaving as soon as Dr T is well enough to go back to work," he reminded her, feeling desperate to crawl out from under the magnifying glass.
"Do you think he'll be able to go back to work?" She stared at him, the sparkle shimmering, enticing him to look closer. "Really?"
No, he didn't.
Neither did Dr T. They'd talked earlier in the evening and Oz would be working out a notice to give the hospital time to find a permanent replacement, spending all his time with Dr T until the end came, then he'd return to Rochester.
He'd return to his home with a gaping hole in his chest where his friend's love and respect had once resided.
Pain gurgled up his chest, burning the lining of his throat.
"Oz?"
He swallowed back the burn, lost himself in Blair's soft expression, in the way her lips curled around his name. Damn, his name sounded good on her lips. Soft, sexy, raspy.
"You don't think he's going to get better, do you?" Her lower lip disappeared between her teeth in a move he'd seen Addy do a dozen times during their sailing trip.
"Miracles happen every day." He sighed, unwilling to lie. "But no, I don't think he'll go into remission. The Xabartan is his only chance and he's not willing to undergo more chemo."
He couldn't bring himself to say that he thought their friend's days were coming to a swift end.
A strangled sound escaped her lips. "You're wrong. He will get better." She trembled. "He has to get better."
"I hope so, Blair. I really do hope so." Oz held her tight. The tears she'd been wiping away since she'd started telling him about Chris flooded unchecked down her cheeks. "Regardless, we'll be here for him and make sure each day is a good one."
As painful as he found watching his friend slowly die, he would stay until the end, would ensure that Dr T didn't want for a thing, that each day was as full as possible, that when Dr T's time came he'd die knowing he was loved.
Oz held Blair while she sobbed against him, held her while she buried her face into his chest, held her when her lips sought his, seeking comfort.
He had no right to give her that comfort. Not really. Not after what she'd revealed, not when he felt her pain and ached inside.
But nor could he deny her what she needed.
What he needed.
Oz kissed her back.
Desperately.
With all the hunger that had built inside him since the first time he'd laid eyes on Blair Pendergrass years ago.
He'd wanted her then, but had known better than to dally with the woman Dr T loved like a daughter, with a woman who had a daughter, and would expect more than dinner dates and hot sex.
Oz needed to stop, to remind Blair that even if they made love, nothing would change. He needed to remind her that for him, making love was just sex, that it wouldn't mean anything beyond the physical. That after he left Madison, there would be other women because that was who he was, who all the men in his family were, as if the trait was really some genetic flaw.
He needed to do all those things, but in her kisses Oz forgot that sex was just a physical act.
Because kissing Blair felt like so much more than physical.
When her hands slid under his shirt, over his abs, along his back, Oz didn't stop her. When she tugged on his T-shirt, pulling the hem over his head, he didn't remind her that he was the womanizing scoundrel she'd once accused him of being.
Instead, he pulled her into his lap, kissed the hell out of her, over and over until every breath he took was hers.
He stood, cradling her in his arms, inadequate in so many ways to be holding such a precious woman.
Her tender kiss against his throat, her sigh of pleasure almost toppled him back onto the sofa, his legs too wobbly to support them both.
He headed up the stairs, down the hallway, striding into his room with one purpose: to claim Blair. He gently laid her on the bed, paused to turn on the bedside lamp to take in the image of her lying on the bed, waiting for him.
For him.
Because Blair was his.
She inexplicably belonged to him.
He saw it in her eyes when she looked at him, felt it in the way she touched him.
He backtracked to the door, shut and locked it in case Addy or Dr T woke.
He turned, saw Blair had taken off her Springsteen T-shirt. Revealing the ample swell of her breasts above her silky blue bra, she bent forward and shucked her shorts down her hips, revealing matching high-cut panties that made her legs look impossibly long.
Damn. Oz instantly transformed into the big bad wolf he remembered once seeing on a cartoon. His eyes bugged, his tongue lolled out the side of his mouth, and wolf whistles blared through his brain.
She was amazing, had his already fully aroused body hardening to painful proportions.
Under his stare, her cheeks brightened. "Sorry."
"Don't be." He had no clue what she could possibly be apologizing for. "You're beautiful, Blair. Perfect."
Her lips curved in a slow smile. "Apparently your hormones are running amok and affecting your eyesight. I'm not beautiful, Oz. But when you look at me like that, you make me feel as if I am. Thank you."
"My pleasure." Oz wasn't going to argue with her. Not when there were so many other things he wanted to be doing. With her. To her. In her.
Closing the distance between them, he reached for the snap to his uncomfortably restrictive shorts.
Shedding his clothes, Oz joined Blair, kissed her, ran his palms over her curves.
When he thrust inside her, he couldn't look away, couldn't help but lose himself in her eyes.
What he saw there scared him, made him think perhaps he should run like hell.
Lying back on the bed, both of them breathless, both of them staring at the ceiling, Oz wondered what he'd done.
He shouldn't have had sex with her.
No matter how much he'd wanted to.
She deserved better than what he'd given her.
He refused to treat her the way Chris had.
He might be like his father when it came to his lack of ability to commit, but he was a better man.
Yet, what more did he have to offer Blair? He wouldn't make false promises about the future. Not when they had no future.
But how was he supposed to ignore what he'd just shared with this incredible woman? How was he supposed to forget what being inside her felt like?
He doubted he'd ever forget, that the rest of his life would be measured by the past hour.
"About this..." he began, wishing he could find the right words to let her know how amazing she was, how good he'd felt holding her, kissing her, making love to her.
To let her know that, no matter how much he wanted her, it couldn't happen again.
Blair cringed. Here it came. The speech reminding her that sex was just sex to Oz. No matter that it had felt like so much more to her.
It had been more than sex to her.
Dear Lord, she'd spilled her guts to him, had revealed how Chris had hurt her. She'd practically thrown herself at Oz, had practically begged him to make love to her, and had definitely had the most amazing sex of her life with the playboy doctor.
What had she been thinking?
So she wasn't like the svelte blondes Oz notoriously brought with him on his visits. He had wanted her. He'd been as wrapped up in their lovemaking as she had.
Hadn't he?
Every insecurity she'd ever known blindsided her.
She pulled the sheet up over her, crossed her arms in front of her breasts.
"I can't do this, Blair." He rolled onto his side, looking at her.
"It's a little late for that, don't you think?" Still staring at the ceiling, Blair battled tears. She would not cry. She wouldn't. So she clung to her anger at herself for forgetting who he was---who he really was. "We already did do this."
Now that the urgency had been curtailed, had he realized she wasn't his usual fare? Was that the problem? Had her generous hips and bosom, the fine stretch marks that marred her lower abdomen from carrying Addy turned him off? Had her enthusiasm for his touch bothered him?
"It's not that I don't still want you, Blair. I do." He reached for her, but she pulled back.
She couldn't deal with him touching her. Not at the moment. Not when her body still sang from repeated orgasms. Not when she was so aware of every breath he took. Not when he was rejecting her and her pride freely bled.
What if he'd only had sex with her out of pity? If he hadn't had the heart to reject her after what she'd revealed about her past?
Darn it, she didn't want his pity.
"I don't want to ruin our friendship."
Their friendship? Surely he wasn't going to play the friendship card? If she'd been honest with herself, she would have admitted from the beginning that they couldn't be friends. She hadn't wanted to be honest because she'd wanted an excuse to be near Oz.
Because she'd been attracted to him for years, but it had only been this trip, seeing him take care of Dr Talbot, that she'd realized Oz's depth, and the depth of her desire.
He raked his fingers through his hair, leaving the golden tufts ruffled. "I value you too much to take you to bed for cheap sex."
Blair tried to keep from wincing, but failed.
Cheap sex. That was all she'd been to him?
Just like Chris.
"That came out wrong," Oz recanted, scooting up in the bed. She forced her gaze not to rest on his bare chest, to ignore the scattering of hair that tapered to disappear beneath the sheet.
Even now, so soon after they'd made love---had cheap sex---desire stirred in the pit of her belly.
She hated herself for it.
Cheap sex.
Humiliation washed over her. She wasn't going to let anyone embarrass her again. Not the way Chris had.
She held up her hand. "Look, you really don't have to do this. We got caught up in the moment and forgot that we barely tolerate each other under normal circumstances. I was still high from watching Springsteen and just got carried away. I know what we did was nothing more than sex."
She couldn't bring herself to say cheap sex. She just couldn't. Not without bursting into tears.
There hadn't been anything cheap about the way she'd felt in Oz's arms. She suspected the price she'd pay would be quite high.
"I'm leaving, Blair." He stared at her, his eyes a steely-blue. "I don't know when, but I will leave. To pretend otherwise would be wrong."
"I didn't expect you to stay. Not because of this." She hated the guilty expression on his face. Hated that he felt he had to explain himself. It wasn't as if she thought he was madly in love with her. She knew he wasn't. After all, this was Oz. He didn't do love and commitment. He did "cheap sex."
So why did her heart protest? Why did her heart argue that Oz could love her? That she was lovable? That what they shared was so much more than cheap sex? Fool, didn't she ever learn?
"Blair."
She could hear the strain in his voice. She even knew why he was making sure she understood.
Oz loved Dr Talbot and didn't want anything to upset their friend, didn't want anything to mar his last days.
She knew exactly what she had to do. The only thing she could do.
She reached over the edge of the bed and retrieved her Springsteen T-shirt from the floor. She pulled it over her head, grateful for the barrier between them. The sheet just hadn't been enough. Not when she knew Oz's well-defined naked body lay beneath it, too.
"Look---" she began, trying to sound as if she did this kind of thing all the time, as if it hadn't been six years, as if her heart wasn't gasping like a fish out of water "---I don't need explanations. Not about this. It's late. We're both tired and we acted on physical needs. Let it go. I plan to." She forced a smile to her face. A this is really no big deal smile. "I'm going to go sleep with Addy."
Not moving from where he lay, Oz watched her dig under the covers for her underwear. She could feel his gaze boring into her. God, where were her panties?
"I don't want you to go. Not like this." He sounded tormented, which in some masochistic way vindicated what she was doing. Yet she knew his turmoil wasn't really regarding her, but Dr Talbot.
For the same reason---for her love of the older man---she'd follow suit and say what needed to be said.
"Don't make more of this than it was, Oz. That would unnecessarily complicate our lives." She clenched her fingers over the silky fabric of her underwear. Thank God. "It's no big deal."
She was lying. Lying though her teeth. But she knew it was what she needed to say, what Oz wanted to hear.
His sigh of relief confirmed her suspicions, shattered the remaining tatters of hope in her heart.
She didn't turn around, didn't look back.
Instead, she went into the room across the hallway, slipped beneath the covers next to her daughter, and willed sleep to heal her breaking heart.
THE following morning, Blair slept later than normal and, amazingly, so did Addy.
Despite the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach, the same sick feeling that had caused her to lie in bed for hours before finally drifting off to sleep, Blair thanked God for her blessings. Thanked God for the precious little girl peeping at her from the other side of the bed.
Everything would be okay.
Stretching, Blair smiled at her precious daughter. "Morning, sleepyhead."
Yawning, Addy grinned, her tongue pushing through the gap created by her missing top tooth. "I didn't know you were here."
"I missed you."
But oh, if she'd known what the night would bring perhaps she'd have stayed home with Reesee.
Facing Oz this morning wouldn't be easy. Thank God she hadn't admitted that her feelings were much more than physical.
How much more she wouldn't allow herself to contemplate.
She'd slept in her Springsteen T-shirt and underwear. She hadn't brought extra clothing, so she put her shorts back on and slid into her sandals.
When she finished, Addy had dressed and stood with her brush and elastic bands. Blair brushed out Addy's golden locks and plaited her hair into a single French braid down the back of her head.
When they went downstairs, Stephanie was sitting at the kitchen table. As usual, she'd brought breakfast. Knowing Addy had stayed the night, she'd brought extra.
"Blair, honey---" the older woman said, giving the little girl a hug "---I didn't realize you were here or I'd have brought you a cinnamon streusel."
Blair's favorite. Just as well, she might throw up if she ate a thing.
She walked over to Dr Talbot and kissed his cheek. "How are you this morning?"
"I'm here." He shot an annoyed look toward Stephanie. "She's force-feeding me as usual."
"If you'd eat, I wouldn't have to force-feed you." Stephanie picked up a spoon and held it out to the older man, sitting in his wheelchair at the table. She nodded toward the box of muffins. "Help yourself, Blair. I brought extra for Addy and Oz, but he didn't eat."
Oh, Oz.
"He's gone?" Oh, no. She shouldn't have asked that. She busied herself by pouring a glass of orange juice for herself and Addy.
"He had Ted up, dressed and in the kitchen when I got here, but then he took off. He left a little over an hour ago."
When Blair turned, Dr Talbot and Stephanie were looking at her. Was what had happened written all over her face like a scarlet letter? Knowing she must look guilty, based on the growing concern in her friends' eyes, Blair searched through the box of muffins, but her mind raced.
Had Oz left to avoid seeing her this morning?
Of course he'd left to avoid seeing her.
Because he was sending the message that what had happened between them really was no big deal.
If he'd cared, wouldn't he have stuck around? Wanted to see her first thing this morning? Wanted to know how she was? How she felt?
Why did his doing exactly what she'd expected of him hurt so much?
But she knew. Deep in her heart she'd believed Oz cared about her. Cared more than his "cheap sex" comment let on. Cared about her as a person, as a woman, as his lover, and, yes, as his friend.
He didn't. The sooner she accepted that, the sooner she quit fantasizing about a man who admitted he didn't want a relationship that consisted of more than casual sex, the better.
"Was Dr Oz going sailing?" Addy pulled the paper wrapper off the chocolate chip bran muffin Stephanie had given her.
"Sailing?" Had Blair's voice squeaked? Her gaze cut to her daughter. Why would Addy think Oz might be sailing? Had he mentioned plans to go sailing? Why would he go sailing on the day after she'd told him about Chris? That was plain cruel.
"I love sailing." Addy didn't glance up from her muffin.
Blair's stomach plummeted. Her rib cage put a death grip on her lungs. "You do?"
Addy nodded. "Sailing is awesome. Dr Oz took me. He let me drive the boat!"
Legs weak, Blair plopped into a chair.
Addy had been out on a sailboat with Oz?
She'd driven the boat?
"We watched the sun disappear, and we saw dolphins," Addy continued, oblivious to the fact Blair's blood had all settled below her ankles.
"Oz took you sailing last night? In the dark?" Did her voice sound as breathless as she felt? As panicky as she felt?
"He wouldn't let me feed the dolphins," Addy complained, her lower lip momentarily pouty as she tore off a piece of her muffin.
"You went sailing with Oz?" Blair repeated, stunned, trying not to envision Addy leaning over the boat railing to feed fish.
"We sailed into the Gulf looking for treasure," Addy informed matter-of-factly. "I got to be a pirate and Dr Oz was my first mate." She giggled at some private memory. "I want to be a sailor when I grow up and sail around the whole world bilfering and blundering."
"Pilfering and plundering," Blair automatically corrected.
Oz had taken her daughter out in a sailboat without her permission. She'd trusted him with the most precious part of her life and he'd taken her out to sea, in the dark.
How could he have been so irresponsible?
How could he not have told her when she'd revealed how Chris had died? He'd had to know, yet he'd purposely not said anything. Then he'd had "cheap sex" with her. The bastard.
"Did Dr Oz go sailing without me?" Addy's forehead wrinkled in consternation. "He promised to take Mommy and me with him the next time he went, but he didn't."
"Oz didn't mention going sailing." Stephanie stared at Blair with concern. "Just that he was going for a run, but he might have jogged to the marina. He's been talking about buying a boat someone has for sale down there."
Boo-boo, scratching at the back door, wanting to be inside the house, saved Blair from saying what she thought about Oz buying a boat. Addy jumped down from her seat to let the dog in.
"Never much cared for sailing," Dr Talbot said from where he sat at the table, still eyeing Blair.
Stephanie placed her hand over Blair's. "Are you okay? I take it you didn't know Oz was taking her out on a boat?"
"No, I didn't." Blair tried to keep her voice calm for Addy's sake, but anger erupted inside her, blowing through her with volcanic force. "But Oz Manning is going to know about how angry I am that he took my daughter out on a boat without my permission."
Sweat covered Oz's brow, his body. He'd been jogging for nearly an hour. Usually nothing cleared his head like a good run. In Rochester, he ran a route from his condo to the park and back, a little over five miles total. In Madison, with the sea air filling his lungs, the breeze whipping at his skin, he felt as if he could go on and on.
Or maybe thinking about the night before was what had him so wired.
He'd made love with Blair.
He grinned, probably looking a fool to the older couple walking along picking up shells. Not that he cared. He felt a fool.
A fool high on life.
Last night his eyes had been opened in many ways.
Ways he'd never dreamed of seeing clearly, but thanks to Blair, he saw.
When she'd hurried from his room, he'd sighed. At first he'd thought his sigh had been in relief. But as he'd lain there, analyzing everything Blair had told him, everything they'd shared physically and emotionally, he'd realized his sigh hadn't been in relief. Instead, he'd sighed at Blair's backtracking, trying to protect her heart.
He recognized the motions well.
He had a lifetime's experience.
He'd always compared himself to his father, but wasn't that taking the safe route? Because, if he wasn't like his father, that meant he must be like his mother, who had been devastated by Oz's cheating father. He'd watched his mother's heart crumble, watched her self-destructive path, and somewhere along the way he'd decided he was like his father as a safety mechanism.
Wasn't being the cad much easier than being the victim of a broken heart?
For years, he'd operated under that misguided notion. He'd never met anyone to make him question his belief, had never met anyone to make him risk being more than a self-proclaimed cad.
Not until Blair.
While lying in the bed they'd made love in, surrounded by the scent of her on his favorite Egyptian cotton sheets, on his pillow, he'd questioned...well...everything.
The fact that he'd done more than either of his parents, that he had committed to medical school, to Dr T, that he'd met a woman he wanted to explore the possibilities with, a woman worth taking risks with.
Mostly, he'd questioned his feelings for Blair.
From the time he'd met her, he'd recognized something different about her, about the way he treated her, felt about her. He'd thought it secondary to Dr T. Now he knew his feelings went deeper.
He wouldn't go so far as to say he was in love with Blair, but he cared for her a great deal.
More than he'd ever cared for a woman.
Knowing that she'd been hurt by his silence, that she'd run because she thought that was what he wanted, Oz had snuck across the hallway to the "mermaid room."
He'd tapped on the door, but Blair hadn't answered. He'd pushed the door open to see her curled next to Addy, fast asleep.
He'd watched her and Addy sleep, wondering how he could care so much for the two sleeping beauties. How he couldn't have realized how important they were to him. That he'd used the guise of friendship to give himself permission to be close to Blair.
He'd gone back to his room, content they'd talk when they woke. He'd risen early, anxious to tell her everything, but not surprisingly, Blair had slept in.
Not breaking from his normal routine so as not to alert Dr T or Stephanie that anything had changed, not until he and Blair had a chance to talk first, Oz had taken off for his usual run. Which was likely for the best.
When he came face-to-face with Blair again, he was going to pull her into his arms and kiss her until she was breathless and no longer spouting garbage about why they'd ended up in bed together.
They'd ended up making love because it had been inevitable. From the day they met they'd been moving in that direction.
Just the memory of making love with her had him stirring beneath his gym shorts. Hell, he was going to have to run into the cold Gulf water if he didn't get his act together.
Only taking a dip would mean being away from Blair longer and surely she was awake by now? Surely when he got back to Dr T's he'd be able to look into Blair's eyes and she'd know he wanted her, cared about her, and that for the first time in his life he wanted to pursue a committed relationship.
Blair loaded the few dirty dishes into the dishwasher and started the load. Addy was in the living room with Dr T and Boo-boo. Stephanie sat at the table, still sipping on a cup of coffee.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Blair glanced toward her friend. Did Stephanie know what had happened between her and Oz? "About what?"
"About why you looked so upset earlier."
"Oh. That." She almost sighed in relief. When her gaze met Stephanie's she realized her mistake.
"Is there another reason you might be upset?"
Blair shook her head. "No. There isn't."
"Just that Oz took Addy sailing?"
"Yes." She pulled out the chair next to Stephanie's. "Oz should have asked before taking her out. He shouldn't have assumed something like that would be okay."
"I'm sure he watched her closely. He adores Addy."
She nodded. "That doesn't give him the right to decide to take her out to sea without my permission."
"He's an experienced sailor. Apparently, his family had a boat that he took out a lot during his younger years. Plus, he's been out several times since he's moved in with Ted."
"It's not that." Blair sighed. "I know I'm paranoid in not wanting Addy out in a sailboat, but her father died in a sailing accident."
She couldn't believe she'd just said that out loud. Perhaps telling one person made telling another easier, though, because she didn't regret her admission.
"I'm sorry, Blair." Stephanie patted her hand. "I didn't know."
"It's not something I talk about."
"I understand." Stephanie gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Let's go sit with Ted."
Blair glanced at her watch and nodded. "I'll visit for a short while, then I'm going to go home, shower and work on odds and ends for the fund-raiser. Can you believe it's so close?"
She and Stephanie went into the den. Addy sat on the floor brushing Boo-boo's fur. Dr T's head dipped forward, his eyes shut, his shoulders slumped.
"Is he already napping?" Stephanie sounded disappointed. "He usually doesn't nap until around noon."
Taking in his gray color, his lack of movement, Blair realized Dr T wasn't napping.
Oh, God.
No, please, no.
She rushed to his side, kneeling next to his wheelchair.
"Dr Talbot?" She shook him, relief filling her when his eyelids fluttered open, when he gasped for a breath.
He attempted to focus on her, slurred a response, then closed his eyes.
"Dr Talbot?" she repeated, grabbing his wrist and taking his pulse. Thready and erratic. She glanced at Stephanie, who was shaking his shoulder and saying his name over and over. "Call 911. Now."
Oz heard the sirens long before he rounded the corner to Dr T's street. He'd sped up. Likely he was being paranoid, but he couldn't get rid of the urgency inside him that said he needed to get home ASAP. Something was wrong.
He'd been right.
The ambulance was parked in front of Dr T's house. The front door stood wide-open. Two uniformed men carried out a body on a stretcher.
Dr T? No!
Oz ran the distance between him and the driveway. His chest burned from the exertion, burned from fear his friend might no longer be with him, that he hadn't been there when his friend needed him, that maybe he could have done something. He didn't slow until he stood next to the ambulance.
"What's going on?" he asked no one in particular. The two paramedics had lifted Dr T into the truck. Stephanie stood with her arms around Addy on the front porch stoop. Both of them sobbed uncontrollably.
"What the hell is going on?" he demanded, preparing to climb into the back of the ambulance. "Somebody tell me what's going on!"
Saying something he couldn't quite make out to the paramedics, Blair stepped out of the ambulance and the men closed the door.
Pale, Blair pulled him out of the way so the emergency vehicle could back up.
"Blair!" He grabbed her shoulders. "Is he alive? What's happened? Tell me."
"Alive. Weak, thready pulse. Incoherent. In and out of consciousness." Her gaze never left the truck, never blinked. The emergency vehicle sped down the road, sirens blasting. "We've got to get to the hospital."
Oz looked down at his sweat-drenched body and shorts. "Let me grab a shirt."
As if noticing for the first time that he wore only jogging shorts, Blair's gaze ran over him. Whatever her thoughts, she only nodded.
When he came back out, Blair and Addy were gone and only Stephanie waited.
"Where's Blair?"
"She's gone to the hospital. Her sister is meeting her to take Addy home."
"Fine," Oz bit out, trying not to read anything into the fact that she'd left him. "Let's go."
DR TALBOT had gone into renal failure due to hypovo-lemia, an electrolyte imbalance and severe anemia. With IV fluids and multiple blood transfusions, he was slowly coming around.
Oz sat next to his friend's hospital bed, along with Stephanie and Blair.
Blair hadn't said a single word to him. Had barely even acknowledged his presence. Instead, she clung to Stephanie. The two women had hugged, crying, while they waited on news of their friend. The emergency room doctor had acted quickly, got treatment started, then admitted Dr T to the ICU. His and Blair's employment with the hospital hadn't hurt, but only because of Dr T's status had the three of them been allowed to stay in the room.
Oz's gaze went from the hospital bed to the woman sitting across from him. She looked devastated. Tired.
She leaned forward, her head resting in her hands.
God, he wanted to go to her. He wanted to hold her.
But without words being spoken, he knew now wasn't the time to confront their feelings for each other. He'd rubbed her back earlier, but she'd gotten up, paced the floor.
Damn, this was all so complicated. His gaze settled on Dr T. So painful.
Oz said a silent prayer for his friend---that he pull out of this, that the cancer would miraculously disappear.
What would Oz do if he lost his friend? How would he cope losing the man who meant so much?
"You should go home and spend some time with Addy." Stephanie reached over to touch Blair's arm. "We'll call if there's any change."
Blair glanced at her watch and nodded. Her gaze returned to the sleeping man with multiple wires and tubes hooked up to him. "I hate to leave him."
"The doctor says he'll sleep most of the evening, anyway. Go home and give Addy a hug for me." Stephanie's hands clenched together. "I hate that she had to witness everything this morning. I'm sure Reesee has smothered her in love, but you know she's anxious for you to return home."
Strained, Blair nodded, walked to the bed and kissed Dr T's cheek. "I love you and will see you in the morning. Please be better. Please."
The older man's eyelids fluttered, but he didn't speak.
Oz's eyes pricked with tears. All afternoon, he'd stayed strong, had tried to provide strength for Stephanie and Blair, but hell, his insides were raw with grief.
He stood, needing a moment to collect himself.
"I'll walk out with you." When Blair started to protest, he added, "I need to."
With only a glance his way at his brusqueness, Blair hugged Stephanie goodbye, promising to call later to check on Dr Talbot.
Oz followed Blair from the ICU room. Silently, they walked to the elevator. Oz trying to pull himself together. Blair thinking Lord only knew what. She punched the down arrow.
When the door slid closed, locking them into the privacy of the car, Oz reached for her, needing to hold her, breathe in her goodness, to grieve with her just for a moment.
"What are you doing?"
"What I've wanted to do since I woke up this morning." He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her close and closed his eyes. Maybe if he held her just a minute the ache in his heart would ease. Maybe he wouldn't feel as if his friend were dying.
"No." She pushed away from him.
Confused, Oz blinked. "No?"
"Don't touch me."
"Huh?" God, he hoped she didn't see the tears in his eyes.
"Just because I've been civil does not mean that I'm speaking to you," she spat at him.
Reeling, Oz just stared at her. She hadn't said a lot, but he'd thought that was due to Dr T's condition. "You're not speaking to me?"
"No."
"Blair, about last night---" How did he tell her that he wanted a repeat? Lots of repeats? That he wanted her in his life?
"You mean when you took my daughter out on a sailboat without my permission?"
He frowned. "I thought you meant when we made love."
"Had cheap sex," she corrected. "You had no right to take Addy out in a sailboat. None whatsoever."
In everything that had happened since she'd told him about how Addy's father died, he'd forgotten about the sailing trip.
"We barely went out of Wolf Bay. She was never in any danger."
"I don't care how far out you went. You didn't have my permission to take her out in a boat. That's so irresponsible."
"Irresponsible? How is my spending time with Addy and teaching her to sail irresponsible?"
"Because you risked her safety."
"That's crazy, Blair." One hand holding the closed door button on the elevator, he cupped her face, forcing her to look at him. "At no point was Addy's safety in question. She was with me. I wouldn't let anything happen to her."
"Like when you were watching her play with Boo-boo and her knee had to be sewn up?"
Blair knew she'd delivered a low blow even before Oz's jaw clenched. He'd hurt her, had risked Addy's life, and a man she loved dearly lay dying. She wanted to lash out at the world. To lash out at Oz.
His hand fell away from her face. "That was an accident."
"Exactly. Which proves my point." She jabbed his chest with her finger. "You can't stop accidents from happening. Taking her out in a boat is tempting fate."
"Because of Chris?"
"Because sailing is dangerous."
"You know this because you've spent a lot of time on a boat?"
"I know this because...because..." Because Chris had died during a sailing accident.
"Addy loved being out in the boat. She's a natural-born sailor."
Blair lifted her chin defiantly. "No, she isn't."
"You're being unreasonable," he pointed out. "If Chris had died in a car accident, you wouldn't forbid Addy from riding in a car."
"He didn't die in a car accident."
He sighed. "I'm trying to make a point, Blair. Be logical."
"Be logical?" Was he kidding? Her whole world was turning upside down and he wanted her to be logical. Glaring, she told him where he could go and it wasn't anyplace nice.
She hit his wrist, hard, and, catching him unawares, knocked his finger away from the door closed button. The elevator door slid open.
Head held high, Blair stormed out of the elevator, ignoring the curious onlookers who'd been impatiently waiting.
Two weeks had passed since Dr Talbot's hospital admission. Having received timely treatment, Dr T was recovering quite nicely and was in better spirits than he'd been prior to his admission.
"What are you looking so gloomy about, boy?"
No wonder Dr T asked. Oz had been staring unseeingly out the hospital room window for Lord only knew how long.
"I'm going home today," Dr T reminded him, pushing up on his hospital bed pillow. "That's cause for celebration."
Dr T was right. His going home was cause for celebration. Actually, the man looked better than he had in weeks. Oz only hoped his improved health wasn't the calm before the storm.
Still, his friend's smile was enough to pull one out of Oz, too.
"You're right. Your going home is cause for celebration. Although Stephanie's wound tight about your fund-raiser tomorrow night, she'll still manage to pull together something to mark your coming home."
"Figured she would." The old man gave him an ominous look. "Blair and Addy going to be there tonight or are you two still avoiding each other?"
Blair was adamantly avoiding him. The first week, she'd taken leave from work to sit with Dr T. Canceling the surgeries on schedule could mean loss of lives. Oz hadn't been able to reconcile that with his conscience, so he'd continued to work, another nurse filling in for Blair. At night, instead of going home, he'd slept in Dr T's room. Which left him and Blair on alternating shifts. Scarcely speaking.
When she had returned to work this week, she'd only said the bare minimum to him.
He'd tried to talk to her, but she'd shut him down, telling him she'd made a horrible mistake thinking they could be friends and that things were better this way.
Better for who? Certainly not him.
He looked like hell. If he hadn't already known, Kanesha had kindly pointed out the fact to him, telling him to go home and get some sleep or he wasn't going to get a single bid at Dr T's auction. Like he cared. He'd match whatever the highest bid was and be done with it. He'd never wanted to be auctioned off in the first place and had only agreed because of Blair.
Dr T's hired nurse, Angie, would be at the house tonight to sit with him, but Oz doubted he'd sleep much for worrying about the older man's first night home. For worrying about how his friend would hold up to attend his fund-raiser. Both his oncologist and his primary care provider had okayed the excursion, but Oz worried it was too soon for him to be undertaking such an outing.
"Son?" Dr T prompted. "You ready to talk about what happened between you and Blair?"
"Not really." Oz sighed. He hadn't told Dr T that anything had happened between him and Blair. He doubted she had. But their friend was no fool. They'd gone from cozy to barely speaking. "She's upset with me."
"Noticed that, did you?" Dr T pressed the button on his hospital bed to raise him to a sitting position. "Question is, what did you do and what are you doing to make things better?"
"She's upset I took Addy out in my boat." He wouldn't go into all the other things Blair was upset about. Rightly so. He sighed. He should just leave her alone. He wasn't good for her and she didn't trust him. So why couldn't he just put her out of his mind? "I've tried talking to her twice since the night you were admitted, but she refuses to talk about it."
"Just twice?" Dr T looked disappointed. "Surely you know women well enough to know that groveling twice isn't nearly enough when you committed that big a mistake."
"Taking Addy sailing wasn't a mistake." Perhaps he should have asked Blair first, but she should have trusted him.
"No?"
"Blair shouldn't put her fears on Addy. It isn't healthy."
Dr T's thin brow lifted. "She told you about Chris? About how he died?"
He nodded.
Dr T's forehead wrinkled in thought. "She's in love with you. That's what all of this is about."
"Blair doesn't love me." He'd thought so, but now he knew better. Otherwise, how could she have turned on him so quickly? How could she have kicked him when he was in just as much pain as she was? When they should have been helping each other through their pain, she'd turned her back on him.
But it had been her verbal attack that had left him cold. Listening to her curse him had opened old wounds of fights between his parents, reminded him that he'd had no business to think he could have a relationship with Blair.
After all, he was a Manning male, and wasn't that better than giving Blair the power to hurt him?
"Hogwash."
Oz's gaze cut to Dr T.
"If you really believe that, then you're a fool. Just like you're a fool if you think I don't know what goes on in my house. I may be dying, but I'm not dead yet."
Oz winced. Nope, his friend didn't mince words.
"She scares you, and you're doing what you do best. Playing the role you think you're supposed to."
Oz leaned back in the chair, propped his feet against the side railing of Dr T's hospital bed. "Blair doesn't scare me."
"You think not?" The older man's thin brow rose. "Then why aren't you fighting for her?"
Fighting for her? Not meeting Dr T's eyes, Oz crossed his arms over his chest. "She doesn't trust me."
"Do you trust her?"
Oz glanced up, stared into unrelenting pale blue eyes. "I'm not the one who threw a fit about my taking Addy out in my sailboat."
"If you trust her, why haven't you told her how you feel?" Dr T's pale eyes narrowed and as usual he cut right to the heart of the matter. "How you really feel about her?"
Why, indeed?
That evening, Blair and Addy helped Stephanie blow up balloons and hang a welcome home banner in Dr T's living room. Ever efficient, Stephanie had even had a cake made. When Oz had arrived with Dr T, they'd cheered, "Welcome home."
"You're looking at him again," Reesee whispered in Blair's ear.
Standing just inside the patio door, Blair sighed. Darn it. She wasn't. "I was looking at Addy."
"Who just happens to be sitting in Oz's lap."
True. Much to Blair's chagrin, Addy couldn't get enough of Oz. From the moment Oz had arrived, Addy clung to him, telling him in no uncertain terms that she'd missed him and demanding to know why he'd yet to take her sailing again.
"Personally, I agree with Addy. He's hot."
"Quit saying that." Blair frowned at her sister. "Whether or not he's hot doesn't matter. He's a jerk."
"A jerk who adores Dr T, adores your daughter and looks at you like he wants to rip your clothes off with his teeth." Reesee shrugged. "Whatever he did that upset you, get over it, Blair. Life's too short to stress the little things."
"The little things? You have no idea what you're talking about." Blair bit into her lower lip.
"Then perhaps you should tell me. Or better yet, why don't you tell him?"
"I don't want to talk about him or to him." She didn't. She didn't even want to think about Oz, yet her brain failed to take note and constantly dwelled on him. "I should go make more tea."
Before her sister could do more than shake her head, Blair ducked back into the house. Anything to escape her sister. To escape the vision of Addy cuddled in Oz's lap. Besides, Dr Talbot loved her sweet tea. She needed to make him a pitcher prior to going home.
And she would be going home soon. She couldn't take much more of Oz. Reesee was right. Oz had been looking at her like he wanted to rip off her clothes.
Why?
Did he want more "cheap sex"?
As if.
She might be a slow learner, but eventually even she got the message. She wouldn't be used by a man again.
She got the teapot out of the cabinet, filled it with water, and placed it on the stove. Twisting the control knob to high, she leaned against a countertop.
"I'm sorry I took Addy out in my boat without your permission."
Blair spun toward the opposite end of the kitchen. Looking impossibly handsome in his jeans and American Heart Disease T-shirt, Oz stood in the doorway.
He searched her face, waited for her to respond. Did he expect her to leap with joy? To fall down on her knees in praise that he'd apologized for something he shouldn't have done to begin with?
"Fine."
"No, it's not fine." He advanced toward her, grasped her arms, forcing her to look at him. "Nothing has been fine since the morning I came back from my run and you started shutting me out of your life."
Wasn't that what he'd wanted? Or had he wanted to continue their little fling a while longer before he called it quits?
"Dr T was being rushed to the hospital. What did you expect? That I'd throw my arms around you?"
God, would he quit touching her? She couldn't think straight with him this near, with his skin against hers. The last time he'd touched her, they'd been in his room, in his bed.
Wincing at the unwanted memories, she averted her gaze. Unfortunately, she stared at the cabinet where Oz had tossed a noodle at her and it had stuck to the oak finish. Everywhere she looked, some memory of Oz lambasted her.
He inhaled a deep breath, brushed his palms over her bare arms. "I'd have preferred that to you giving me the cold shoulder during a time when we needed each other."
She pulled free of his hold. "I didn't need you."
"No?" His brow arched. "I needed you, Blair. Each and every night while I lay in that god-awful cot in Dr T's room, I needed you there with me."
Blair's heart raced. What was he saying? That they'd shared more than cheap sex?
No, that couldn't be what he was saying. He'd told her point-blank he was leaving. He'd been the one to pull away before his heart rate had even returned to normal.
"You need to find someone else to be your friend, Oz. I no longer want that job."
"Damn it, I'm not talking about being my friend, Blair. I'm talking about me and you, about what happened between us, about what is happening between us." He frowned. "Or was happening."
"Don't act like I'm the bad guy here, Oz Manning. You were the one who called what happened 'cheap sex'."
He shook his head. "You misunderstood, Blair. Making love to you could never be cheap sex."
Only it had been. With Chris. And that night with Oz. Afterward, he'd left her feeling cheap. Feeling that once again, she'd let her heart put her in a humiliating place, a place that would leave her raw and aching yet again.
"None of this matters." She just wanted away from him. Far away. Somewhere she wouldn't have to be constantly confronted by what she'd foolishly wanted. "So what, we had sex? It's not like either of us expected anything more."
"I expected more, Blair. Lots more."
He'd wanted to keep having sex with her? Okay, so that soothed her hurt ego a little, but she couldn't handle an affair. Not with Oz. She cared too much for him. Addy cared too much for him. The best thing she could do was put as much distance between them as possible so when he left they wouldn't be devastated any more than they already would be.
"I don't want more." She wanted everything. All the things Oz would never give her. All the things she'd dreamed of prior to Chris breaking her heart. She wanted a happily-ever-after of her own. One where she loved and was loved. One where she had someone to share her life with. One where Addy had a father who cherished her. One where Blair had someone to share a pregnancy with, to have him caress her belly and love the growing life inside as much as she did. She wanted all that and more from Oz.
He wouldn't give her more. She wouldn't settle for less.
"The night we made love was the best night of my life, Blair." His words teased, made hope surge inside her. "I didn't want that night to end. I still don't. I want you in my life. I want to be a part of Addy's life."
Did he have any idea how difficult he was making this? It would be so easy just to say yes. To let Oz carry her upstairs and make love to her again and again. But then what? He'd leave and she'd be left to pick up the pieces of her and Addy's broken hearts. No, she wouldn't do it.
She'd focus on what had happened with Chris, on the horrible pain she'd felt, anything to protect her from allowing Oz to do the same.
Oz raked his fingers through his hair. This wasn't going as well as he'd hoped. Hell, when he'd followed Blair into the kitchen, he hadn't had a plan. He'd just known that he'd been ignored long enough, that he wanted her in his life. All day, he'd been trying to figure out how he felt about Blair, what exactly it was he wanted from her.
A few cold, hard facts hit him. The main one being that he missed her. Her smile. The way her eyes sparkled like big green jewels. The expression she wore when deep in concentration. The feel of her lips against his. The taste of those lips. God, he missed how she tasted.
He reached for her. "I want you in my life. Quit shutting me out."
She shook her head in denial, backing away from him. "You took Addy out in a sailboat. A sailboat." She practically choked on the word. Her eyes searched his. "How could you?"
"I didn't know about Chris, Blair. But even if I had, I might still have taken her." The truth hit him, hard. Why hadn't he realized before? Probably because he'd been gutted by Dr T's collapse, gutted by Blair's refusal to have anything to do with him. "This isn't about my taking Addy out in the boat, is it?"
Her gaze narrowed. "What do you mean? Of course it's about you taking my daughter out to sea without my permission."
"I don't believe you."
"I don't care if you believe me or not." She rolled her eyes, snorted, turned to remove the whistling teapot from the stove. Ignoring him, she dropped a couple of tea bags into the boiling water. "Go away, Oz. I have nothing to say to you."
She wasn't going to make this easy. Had he really expected her to? Was he laying everything on the line for nothing? Yet he had to tell her, had to know.
"Fine, then listen to me." He held up his finger, shushing her when she started to interrupt him. He'd been cut off by her one time too many over the past two weeks. Tonight, she was going to hear him out. "For the first time in my life, I want a relationship. With you. I understand you were hurt by what happened with Chris, but I'm not him." Did she have any idea how difficult this was for him? How it went against everything within him to make himself so vulnerable to her whims? "But we can't have a relationship without trust."
She opened her mouth again, but he rushed on. "You have to decide, Blair. Do you trust me? Do you really trust me and want to be a part of my life?"
THE following night, Blair sat in her car in the hotel parking garage. She closed her eyes.
She didn't want to go inside. Once she went into the hotel, the evening's events would move forward without her having any real control.
For so many reasons, she'd rather go home, to the safety of the nice little cocoon she'd made for herself over the past two weeks.
For the past six years.
From the passenger seat, Reesee patted Blair's arm. "No worries. You look great, sis."
"Like a princess," Addy piped up from the back.
Taking a deep breath, Blair nodded. "Thanks to you two."
She touched one of the rhinestone studded combs that Reesee had pulled her hair back with. When Reesee had asked what Blair planned to wear to the fund-raiser, her sister had thrown a fit and taken Blair shopping for a new dress, heels and handbag. She just hadn't had time for shopping. Not with worrying about Dr T, sitting with him at the hospital, spending time with Addy and fielding questions about why the little girl hadn't seen Dr Oz.
Blair had insisted Addy and Reesee have new outfits, too. Her treat. They'd had great fun dressing up and for a short while Blair had forgotten all the things weighing so heavily on her mind. Her sister and Addy had done Blair's makeup and hair, too.
Glancing in the mirror, she admitted that she didn't look bad. As a matter of fact, they all looked great, and she was ready to spread her wings and fly.
Okay, so maybe not really, but she still had to go inside. After all, she'd helped put the bash together.
Determined to be positive, even if it killed her, Blair winked at Addy in the rear-view mirror. "Come on, Princess Addy. The party can't get started without the Pendergrass princesses."
Addy giggled as Blair let her out of the car seat.
They left the parking garage and rode the elevator up to the ballroom level. Addy insisted upon pressing the buttons, of course.
Planning to help Stephanie with any last-minute items that came up, they'd arrived early. When Blair had spoken to her at Dr Talbot's the night before, Stephanie had assured her the night would be a success and that every detail had been covered.
Last night at Dr Talbot's.
Blair closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and stepped into the ballroom.
Immediately, she spotted Oz talking to one of the band members.
How appropriate that he'd be the first person she'd see.
How appropriate when just looking at him in his tux with its crisp bow tie tugged at her heart.
His gaze lifted, met hers. For several heartbeats neither of them moved.
"There's Dr Oz." Addy tugged on Blair's hand. "Mommy, come on. It's Dr Oz!"
Blair's gaze dropped to her daughter. Just because tension zapped between her and Oz didn't mean her daughter didn't still idolize the man.
"You can say hello with Aunt Reesee." She glanced at her sister for confirmation. "I'm going to see if Stephanie needs help."
Addy practically ran to Oz. Blair hated watching, but couldn't look away.
Oz scooped her up into his arms. Addy kissed his cheek and held up her wrist to show him the tiny pearl bracelet she'd gotten during their shopping excursion.
When Addy's exuberance paused for a breath, Oz spoke to Reesee. Her sister shook her head at whatever he said. His gaze shifted to Blair. Wishing she hadn't been caught watching, she lifted her chin and walked away in search of Stephanie.
Her friend was in a tizzy, trying to make sure every detail was attended to, but took the time to hug Blair.
"I love that dress," she praised, stepping back and letting her gaze sweep over Blair. "The color matches your eyes perfectly and makes them look huge."
"Thanks. You look great, too," she told her honestly. Stephanie wore a coppery dress that bespoke timeless elegance and class. "Mine is Reesee's doing."
Blair looked down at the simple green satin dress her sister had convinced her to buy. A rhinestone brooch nestled where the material veed at her breasts. In Blair's opinion there was way too much of her chest on display in that vee, but Reesee insisted she looked hot. She wore silver four-inch heeled sandals that would be killing her feet if she stood for more than fifteen minutes.
"You should let Reesee dress you all the time," Stephanie said, checking out Blair's hemline, which fell to just above her knees. "You look gorgeous."
"Thank you. Tell me where I can be the most help."
Something behind Blair caught Stephanie's attention and her brows drew together.
Stephanie gave a nod toward Dr Talbot. "Tonight is all about Ted. Go keep him company. If you'll just make sure he's taken care of, that he smiles often, I can handle the rest."
Frowning toward the band, Stephanie took off to redirect where they were setting up.
Blair took a deep breath, spotted Dr Talbot sitting at a table in his wheelchair. Wearing a tuxedo, he looked handsome despite his illness and Blair smiled in pride and love.
She went to the table and hugged him. Before long, Reesee and Addy joined them.
Addy immediately monopolized Dr Talbot's attention, recounting their shopping adventures.
Reesee leaned near Blair's ear. "Oz is crazy about you."
Her heart slamming against her rib cage, Blair snorted. "Yeah, right." If only. Oz wanted a fling while in Madison. She was convenient.
Blair ignored the tiny voice whispering that sex was always convenient for a man like Oz. Women bent over backward to get close to him.
He wanted her trust. Did one have to trust a fling? Where was that rule written? And if he had really wanted her trust he should have earned it instead of practically kicking her out of his bedroom.
"I'm serious." Reesee's expression said she was, but Blair wasn't buying it.
"Then why doesn't he come over here to see me?"
"He doesn't have to come over here to see you." Reesee waggled her penciled on brows. "Don't look now, but he's seeing you this very moment."
Blair looked.
"Hey." Frowning, Reesee poked her. "I told you not to look."
Oz was looking at her.
At least, he had been. Without acknowledging her, he turned toward the couple he stood with.
"He made his feelings clear last night." He'd made his feelings clear just then. Either she trusted him or he wasn't willing to have a relationship with her.
As if she'd asked him for a relationship. Relationship. She and Oz had very different definitions for that word.
Besides, had he forgotten that she was upset with him about taking Addy out in a boat?
Of course he hadn't. Her not trusting him to look out for Addy, to make decisions where her daughter was concerned, had been one of the trust issues he'd been referring to. Knowing he'd break her heart if she let him was another. She didn't intend to give him that opportunity.
"Are you sure you didn't misunderstand?" Reesee asked. Blair hadn't told her sister about Oz confronting her the night before, about his professing to having feelings for her and wanting a relationship with her.
"I just can't understand," Reesee continued, "because I know I didn't misinterpret his asking me how you were."
Oz had asked how she was?
"Nor did I misunderstand when he commented on how beautiful you looked. He couldn't take his eyes off you."
Okay, so he'd asked how she was and said she was beautiful.
"For Oz that's nothing more than polite conversation." Blair glanced to make sure Addy couldn't hear their conversation. Her gaze collided with Dr Talbot's.
He'd been eavesdropping and didn't look one bit ashamed. Nor did he look surprised by any of the things he'd just heard. He loved her and wouldn't want her hurt. Had he realized she'd fallen for Oz and intervened on her behalf? Did he know about what had happened the night she and Addy spent the night at his house? That she'd ended up in Oz's room? Was that what last night had been about?
Of course it was.
Oz hadn't told her he loved her.
His confronting her in the kitchen made sense now. He could even honestly tell Dr Talbot that he'd offered to have a relationship, but Blair had walked away.
She couldn't be angry at Dr Talbot for caring, for doing what he thought was best for her by encouraging Oz to have a relationship with her.
But she was angry at Oz.
Trust. Ha, she'd give him trust.
She had a good mind to walk up and tell him she'd decided she did trust him. Just to watch him try to squirm his way out of that one. But she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of rejecting her, of telling her that he'd been joking, that he'd only offered a relationship under duress.
No, she wouldn't ever give Oz Manning the opportunity to hurt her again.
An hour later the event was in full swing. A stage dominated the far end of the ballroom. The band played to the right. Buffet-style snack foods and tables occupied the opposite end of the room.
The event was sold out to the room's full capacity. Which was great for Dr Talbot. Horrible for Blair's stomach.
"You don't look like you're having a very good time," Dr Talbot mused from where he sat beside her. After the MC had introduced him to the crowd he'd been pushed in his wheelchair to the table closest to the stage. Seats had been reserved next to him in Blair, Reesee and Addy's name. They had a perfect view of the stage. Addy took every detail in with excitement, insisting on sampling the chocolate fountain and strawberries.
Reesee had volunteered to go with her as chocolate was involved.
Blair forced a smile to her face. "I feel like I should be doing something to help Stephanie, but she insists I stay with you, which I enjoy. But big shindigs like this aren't my usual cup of tea."
"Mine either," he agreed. "Who likes all this attention?"
But there was a light in his eyes she hadn't seen in weeks. A sparkle that said he was enjoying all the hoopla even if he implied otherwise.
For that alone, all the work they'd done had been worth it.
Blair followed Dr Talbot's gaze and smiled for real at what she found him watching.
"Stephanie really went all-out to make sure this was a spectacular party, didn't she?" Blair leaned closer to him and placed her hand on his upper arm.
"Yes, she goes all-out in everything she does. Reminds me of Selma."
That was something she'd never heard him say before.
"Stephanie reminds you of your late wife?"
Dr Talbot nodded. "In ways. In others they are as unique as night and day."
His ache infected Blair. How sad it must be to have loved someone so completely only to have to watch them die. To go on with life without the person you most loved.
Blair's eyes watered. "You miss her, don't you?"
"Selma?" His pale eyes took on a faraway gleam. "Every minute of every day."
"I can't imagine having a love like that."
"Can't you?" Dr Talbot's gaze shifted to her.
Despite her feelings for Oz, they were never meant to be. Eventually, he would have left her. Then she'd have been alone, nursing a broken heart; alone, trying to explain to Addy why Oz was no longer a part of their life. So she pretended to misunderstand.
"What I had with Chris was nothing like what you and Selma shared."
"I wasn't referring to Addy's father. I was referring to Oz." Dr Talbot placed his hand over hers, giving her a fatherly pat. "But you already knew that."
Her gaze shifted to where Oz stood with a group of women. All evening he'd gone from one group to another, working the crowd. He checked on Dr Talbot periodically, but otherwise he stayed away from their table.
"I don't love Oz." She plastered what she hoped was a convincing look on her face.
She wouldn't place the burden of her broken heart on their mutual friend. She wouldn't have him pushing Oz to say things he didn't mean in an effort to spare her. Oz didn't love her. If he did, he'd have told her last night.
"Are you sure about that?"
Absently rubbing her sternum, Blair nodded. "I'm sure. He's too much like Chris for me to ever take him seriously."
"Odd, from what little you've told me about Addy's father, I wouldn't have thought him and Oz had anything in common." Dr Talbot paused. "Except you and a love of sailing."
"I'd really rather not talk about Chris." At Dr Talbot's open mouth, she quickly added, "Or Oz. Or sailing."
She swallowed, trying to clear the wave of emotion tightening her throat. She could do this. She could be strong. Could keep her tears reined in for one night.
"Oz adores Addy. Just as he adores you." Dr Talbot gave her a pointed look. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"
Blair shook her head. "Oz is a persuasive man. I got caught up in his charms. That's all." She called upon acting skills she wasn't sure she had, but desperately needed. For that matter, Oz was a persuasive man and she had gotten caught up in his charms. Horribly caught up. But what had happened with Oz hadn't been all bad. For the first time in years, she'd felt like a woman. She'd felt desire and desirable.
"Actually, I'm grateful to him," she admitted. "I buried myself after what happened with Chris and had forgotten what it felt like to have a man's attention." A real smile lifted the corners of her lips. "Maybe I'll bid on a date tonight and meet someone."
Dr Talbot didn't comment, just stared at her long moments before nodding and returning his attention to the band. Blair let him, not wanting to peel away the pretty wrapping she'd just hidden her aching heart inside.
Soon it was time for the auction. The women were being auctioned off first.
A radio DJ was first. Loving the concept of being auctioned, she worked the crowd, winking and egging on higher bids. Blair was quite impressed with the upper four-digit sum the woman's date went for.
The next few dates passed in a blur. All of the women drew ridiculously high dollar amounts for an evening of their time. But it was for a great cause and Blair suspected this was a way for Dr Talbot's friends and colleagues to feel that they were doing their part to help him.
Prior to the auction for the men starting, Blair and Stephanie had a few announcements to make. They took the stage, gave their spiel about Dr Talbot and his lifelong generosity to those he came into contact with. Blair thanked the audience for their generosity and encouraged them to bid on the silent auction set up at the side of the room, encouraged them to make donations to one of the many collection bins set up around the room.
When she made her way back to her table, Dr Talbot reached up to hug her. "You were magnificent."
"I was too scared to move."
"Too scared to move worked brilliantly." A proud gleam in her eyes, Reesee hugged her, too. "I don't think there's a dry eye in the building."
"Mommy---" Addy jumped up and down, too excited to stay in her seat "---you looked beautiful up there!"
Magnificent. Brilliant. Beautiful. Blair laughed. "I stood there petrified. I hope my words came out clear." She smiled at Dr Talbot. "They were from the heart. We love you, don't we, Addy?"
Her big grin showing off her missing front tooth, Addy nodded and spread her arms as wide as they would stretch. "This much."
Dr Talbot's smile reached his glistening eyes. "I know you do. That's why I'm here. Why I'm getting on a plane for Rochester tomorrow afternoon."
Blair's stomach flip-flopped. "You were accepted for the Xabartan?"
"My hospital stay convinced me that I'm not quite ready to give up yet. Oz arranged everything. He's offered to let me stay at his place until I've completed my therapy. Hate to bum off the kid, but figure there's not much difference in living in his house here or living in his house there." He paused, then dropped another bombshell. "I'm going to ask Stephanie to go with me."
"Thank God." Blair wrapped her arms around his neck. "The treatments will work. I know they will." Then what he'd said about living in Oz's house hit her. "What do you mean, living in his house here? Oz is living with you."
"Technically." His gaze fell to his wrinkled hands on the table. "I sold my house to Oz prior to Selma dying. The banks wouldn't loan me any more money and I wouldn't take a handout. Oz paid off the mortgage on the house and paid me a hefty sum as well."
"But..." Dr Talbot had never said anything. Oz had never said anything, but then he wouldn't, would he? To do so would be stripping away yet another layer of Dr Talbot's pride. Oz would never do that.
"I owed more than the house was worth, but he insisted I take the extra and I was desperate to allow Selma to spend her last days as she wished---at home."
"I'm sure Oz understood that." Sensing how embarrassed her friend was at his admission, she refocused on his good news. "I'm so pleased you're going to Rochester. If Oz made that happen, then I'm eternally grateful to him."
Blair hugged him again and sat back down. Addy climbed into her lap, kissing Blair's cheek and giving an excited clap although Blair was sure Addy didn't fully understand what she was excited about. Or perhaps her daughter was just excited about the entire glitz of the night.
Blair took a drink of her ice water. "I really do love you, you know."
"I know, Blair. It's one of the reasons why I'm going to Rochester."
A country music singer who'd just been auctioned off sang a song, putting the crowd back into an upbeat mood prior to the auction starting back. This time with the men.
The thing Blair had been dreading most was watching a bunch of women haggle over Oz, knowing one of them would buy his date, spend precious time with him on his cursed sailboat.
He'd be sailing off into the sunset with another woman and making waves. Well, she supposed that depended on who won Oz's date, but the man led a charmed life. Some gorgeous knockout would probably bid some insanely high bid on him, then rock his world.
After all, it was only a matter of time before he moved on to the next woman.
Just as well she hadn't made a fool of herself by throwing her arms around him last night and telling him everything in her heart.
She sucked in a deep breath and prayed the night would soon be over.
The bid prior to Oz's was his friend Will Majors from Madison Medical Center. A cute blonde in the second row of tables immediately piped up with a three-thousand-dollar bid.
"Are you okay?" Stephanie asked from Oz's side. "I've seen you look at Blair a dozen times. Why don't you just go and talk to her?"
"The ball is in her court. I told her what I wanted. Apparently, she doesn't want the same. Or, if she does, it's not enough."
Stephanie gave him a suspicious look. "You told her you were in love with her?"
"I'm not in love with her," he quickly denied. Far from it. He'd had sex with Blair---amazing sex---but the world kept turning. He wasn't his mother. He wouldn't shut down and turn to life's vices to deal with a broken heart. His heart wasn't broken. He was just fine, regardless of how Blair felt.
"Are you planning to bid on any of the bachelors?" he said, changing the subject.
"The only man I'm interested in isn't up for bid."
They both glanced toward Dr Talbot. He leaned toward Blair, laughing at something she said.
"Unfortunately, he refuses to let me tie myself to a dying man, says we'll only marry if he beats his cancer."
"Stubborn old fool. Guess that gives him one hell of an incentive to get better."
Stephanie shrugged. "I think he just uses the cancer as an excuse to keep from hurting my feelings. He's still in love with his wife."
"He'll always love Selma, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care about you."
"I know he cares," Stephanie agreed, sighing. "But caring isn't enough, is it? Just look at you and Blair."
Him and Blair?
"There's nothing between me and Blair."
"Exactly."
"I don't want her to get hurt, if that's what you mean." Or would he have been the one hurting?
Damn.
He was hurting.
"You think you didn't hurt her?"
He had.
He knew he had.
So what was his excuse?
He and Blair shared sexual chemistry. Nothing more.
He glanced toward her, saw her laugh at something Dr T said. His heart ached. Would she ever laugh like that for him again? Would he ever look into her eyes and see that sparkle?
That sparkle that he'd been sure had been love.
So sure he'd felt like a million bucks the next morning and had planned to whisk Blair off her feet.
Because he loved her.
Addy, too.
Whatever feelings Blair had for him, he'd killed when she'd walked away from his bed and he'd told her he just wanted to be friends.
Idiot.
And last night, what had he done? Pushed her to trust him when he hadn't trusted her.
He hadn't, not with his heart.
Stephanie cleared her throat, causing him to look at her. "Tell her, Oz. Tell her before it's too late."
Could he tell Blair how much he cared? To do that would give her the ultimate power over him. Would give her the power his father had held over his mother. Would cast him in the role of his mother if Blair didn't feel the same, if she couldn't trust him with her heart.
The MC motioned for Oz to take the stage.
Blair didn't have to prove anything by watching women bid on Oz.
"Can you keep an eye on Addy for a few minutes?"
Reesee nodded, giving Blair a sympathetic look. Her sister knew exactly why she was leaving the room.
"Mommy, you'll miss Dr Oz." Addy's big eyes looked at Blair as if she were insane to leave now. "We have to bid on him 'cause I miss him. And his date is sailing. And I love sailing."
Blair's mouth opened, but she didn't know what to tell her daughter. She looked at her sister, hoping for help, but Reesee only shrugged. "She loves sailing. Buy the kid a date with the man."
Like Blair could afford him, even if she wanted to bid on Oz, which she didn't.
"Addy, hon, we can't buy Oz's date."
"Why not?" Addy frowned at her mother. "I want to go on Dr Oz's boat again. I'm a good captain and we need to do more bilfering and blundering."
"Pilfering and plundering." Blair waited for the panic to set in. The panic that always hit her when she thought of sailing. The thought of Addy being on a boat would likely send her into ventricular tachycardia.
Only her heart kept beating normally.
Because Oz would never put Addy in harm's way. Never. He'd protect her with his life.
"Addy, I can't buy Oz's bid. I know you don't understand, but things are complicated."
"Don't you want to go sailing with Dr Oz?"
She couldn't lie to Addy. "I do want to spend time with him, but like I said, things are complicated. His date will go for a lot of money and I don't have a lot of money."
Addy's face squished with confusion. "But Mommy, we don't need lots of money. Dr Oz takes us places for free."
"I'm sorry, Addy, but I'm not bidding on Oz." She glanced at no one in particular. "Excuse me."
She left the table before anyone could try to convince her to stay.
Blair made it to the edge of the room and was on her way into the hallway in search of a bathroom when Stephanie caught up with her.
"Where are you going?"
"To the bathroom."
"Now? Oz is up for bid."
Did everyone think she was oblivious to that fact? If only.
"And Oz being up for bid matters to me how?"
Stephanie frowned at Blair's snappish question. "He matters to you a great deal. Don't pretend otherwise."
"Then you'll understand why I have no desire to watch women fight over him."
"Why aren't you fighting for him?"
Blair stared blankly at Stephanie.
"If you care about him, why did you let him walk away so easily? He told you he wanted a relationship and you walked away, Blair. Why?"
"I didn't understand why he said that last night. Not at first, but tonight I realized. He thinks our being involved would make Dr Talbot happy, that's why he said what he did. Because he loves Dr Talbot and would do anything to make him happy."
"Surely you don't believe that bunch of bull?"
Her eyes watering, Blair blinked at her friend. "He's going to leave, Stephanie. What then? Am I supposed to beg him to stay?"
Stephanie shrugged. "If that's what it takes. Loving a man like Oz isn't easy, but nothing worth having ever is. The real question is---do you love him enough to risk everything to be with him? Even knowing it might not last, even knowing you'd be devastated if it doesn't? Is the risk of pain worth the joy of loving?"
Blair stared at Stephanie, a woman in love with a man full of cancerous lesions, a man she'd likely lose to death sooner rather than later. "I do care about Oz."
"I'm not the one you should be telling. You need to tell him, right now."
"He's on stage."
Stephanie shrugged. "Life's too short to let something like that stop you. He wants you to buy his date."
"This is crazy, Stephanie. I can't bid on him." His date was sailing. "I won't bid on him."
Looking disappointed in her, Stephanie shrugged. "Oz wants you to trust him, Blair."
Damp heat flushed her skin, darkened her vision.
"Do you love him?"
Blair couldn't speak.
"Do you?" Stephanie demanded, shaking Blair's arm.
"Yes."
"Then perhaps it's time you showed him just how much."
OZ SCANNED the crowd, but the stage lights prevented him from seeing beyond the first row of tables.
Blair hadn't returned to her seat. She'd caught his eye when he went onto the stage, but he hadn't been able to spot her since. Had she left?
She'd cared for him, but he'd been a fool and lost her.
Hell, he'd pushed her away.
He'd been right about one thing. He didn't deserve Blair.
But he wanted her.
With all his heart.
Prior to meeting Blair, Oz would have winked at the busty redhead bidding on him. He would have grinned at the leggy blonde raising the stakes. These days he only had eyes for one woman.
Because he was nothing like his father.
A curvy little brunette had captured his heart.
And she'd left.
Out of love for Dr T, he kept a smile pasted on his face, but his heart wasn't in the auction.
His heart was wherever Blair was.
Damn it. As soon as the auction was over, he was going to find her, make her listen, make her understand.
Then he was going to do what he should have done to begin with after they'd made love, what he should have said last night when he'd made such a mess of telling her how he felt.
He was going to ask Blair to marry him.
He'd win her heart.
Win her love.
Win her trust.
In the process he'd win his own happiness.
Because when he'd been with Blair he'd been happier than he recalled ever being.
His mother had warned him about being led astray by women. Oz had taken her advice to heart. He'd planned to learn from dear old Dad's mistakes.
But Blair wasn't a mistake.
Losing her, however, would be the biggest one of his life.
God, would this auction hurry and end? He had to go find Blair and beg her to forgive him. To marry him.
He'd never be like his father. He'd earn Blair's trust and cherish her love. He'd spend all his days glorying in the fact that she'd chosen him to love, chosen him to spend her life with.
He wouldn't consider the alternative.
Hands shaking, Blair motioned to the MC.
"Looks like we have a new bidder, ladies and gents."
Oz glanced in the direction the MC had looked, but Blair knew he couldn't see her. Still his gaze landed on where she stood and she couldn't help but wonder if he sensed her.
"We have a counter bid." The MC played to the crowd.
Blair nodded to the bid taker, who'd moved near where she stood.
The MC shouted in delight at Blair's bid, calling out for someone to go higher. Someone did.
Blair cringed. She'd have to sell her soul to come up with the cash to cover her bid if she went higher. Still, the money was going to Dr Talbot.
She bid higher.
But so did whomever she was bidding against.
Blair looked at the man onstage, noted that he was worth whatever it cost to make him hers. What guarantee did she have that he'd even give her a chance to tell him how she felt? To tell him how foolish she'd been?
None whatsoever if she didn't win this date.
She would win his date.
She would go out on his sailboat with him and while out there she'd show him how much she loved him. She'd give him her heart for all time.
Blair wasn't surprised when the MC glanced back in her direction for another bid. Fine, what was another five hundred dollars at this point? She motioned to the bid taker, who flashed in her bid.
"Going once, going twice."
Blair held her breath, praying she'd win Oz.
"Sold. To the cute little blonde in the front."
"What?" Blair demanded of the bid taker who'd taken her bid. "I bid. You saw me. You gave him my bid."
The poor volunteer shrugged in confusion. "I guess he didn't see me."
Oh, this would never do. She'd go onstage and demand the bid be opened back up, demand her bid be given fair opportunity. No cute little blonde in the front row was going sailing with Blair's man. Uh-huh. No way.
Determined to set things straight, she marched toward the stage.
"Mommy!" Addy exclaimed as Blair stormed past. When she didn't stop, Addy grabbed her dress. "Mommy, I have a surprise!"
Blair paused, glanced at her daughter. She didn't want to dampen Addy's excitement, but she was desperate to correct the MC's oversight. "Addy, honey, Mommy needs to talk to the MC a minute about Dr Oz's date."
"Isn't it wonderful?" Addy grinned, wiggling back and forth in her princess dress, then throwing her arms wide. "Surprise."
"Huh?"
"Aunt Reesee and I bought Oz for you. Dr Talbot and Stephanie helped, too."
They'd...
"Oh, Addy." Tears stung Blair's eyes. She'd been bidding against her daughter for a date with Oz. The absurdity of it caused laughter to bubble up her throat. She stooped down and hugged her cute little blonde. "You bought Oz for me?"
Grinning proudly, Addy nodded. "'Cos we love him, right?"
"We do, Addy. Mommy loves him so very much."
"But do you trust him?"
Blair spun toward Oz, her face pale as she realized he'd heard what she'd said. He hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but her words had made his hopes soar. Had she meant her claim? Did she love him?
God, he hoped so.
Blair stepped toward him, looked unsure of herself.
"How do you feel about me, Blair?" he asked, then realized he was taking the easy way out again. He held up his hand. "No, don't tell me. Listen, instead, to how I feel about you."
"I know how you feel about me. You told me last night."
"You know that I want to marry you?"
Her mouth dropped open.
"Say yes, Mommy," Addy encouraged from beside them. "Yes, Dr Oz, we will marry you."
Oz glanced toward Reesee, and she immediately retrieved her niece, who was unhappy about leaving.
"Because of Dr Talbot?" Blair's green gaze bored into him. "Is that why you want to get married? Because you know it'll make him happy?"
Oz digested what she'd said and put his heart on the line. "How about marrying me to make me happy?"
Blair blinked. "Why would you want to marry me?"
"For the same reason most men want to marry a woman."
"Which is?"
"I love you, Blair. I think I have from the moment I first met you, but I was too blind to see it." He took her hand in his. "My parents weren't happily married. Not at any point during any of their many marriages. I decided long ago that I wasn't going to venture into love or marriage. I didn't realize I wouldn't be given a choice."
"There's always a choice, Oz."
"Then I choose to love you, Blair, and want you to choose to love me."
Sincerity shone in his eyes. He was serious. He loved her.
Blair closed her eyes. "I'm afraid I'll lose you. I couldn't bear it."
"You won't lose me, Blair."
She shook her head. "You don't understand."
"I do." He cupped her face, stared into her eyes. "What happened with Chris was an accident."
Blair bit her lower lip. "What if another accident happens?"
"It won't."
"How can you be sure?"
"No one can ever be sure of something like that. I'll sell the boat, if that's what you want, Blair, but this isn't really about the boat, is it? It's about taking a chance on loving someone, on possibly getting hurt. It's about trust, so I have to ask again---do you trust me?"
He was right. It wasn't about the boat.
"Trust me, Blair."
"You'll catch me?"
He nodded. "Always."
"I trust you, Oz. With my heart, with Addy, with my future."
"I want you, Blair. Forever. I want you to be my wife, my partner, the mother of my children."
"I am yours. Probably from that first day Dr Talbot introduced us, but you scared me." She pressed her palm to his heart, stared into his eyes and smiled. "I'm not scared anymore, Oz. Not as long as I have you by my side. I'll marry you if that's what you want."
Tugging on his bow tie and pulling it free from his neck, Oz grinned, feeling as if he could take on the world and win. He took his bow tie, tied it around her wrist. "I don't have a ring, so for tonight, this shows the world that I belong to you."
"That you belong to me? Or vice versa?" Blair laughed.
"Both."
"I like the sound of that." Blair twined her arms around his neck, stared into his eyes. "I love you, Oz."
"Just so you know---" he pressed a kiss to her lips "---I'm going to hold you to that love every day for the rest of our lives."
ISBN: 978-1-4268-5053-0
PLAYBOY SURGEON, TOP-NOTCH DAD
First North American Publication 2010
Copyright © 2009 by Janice Lynn
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