<prompt> Human: Ill start this off with some background.I have known my wife for almost 10 years, we met in high school. We dated throughout college, and we finally got married last year. We both have great jobs. She has a sweet bonus structure at her job, on top of her 55K salary. I have a salary at 50K, but also receive quarterly bonuses and profit sharing from my company Some people who have worked here for years make 6-7 figures from the profit sharing distributions alone. Id say in total, we make around 140K, and it will only keep increasing as I acquire more ownership with my company, which happens fairly regularly.That said, Im worried about her parents. Her father is retired and has been for the past 10 years due to medical issues he just turned 60, and her mother works as a school counselor. I know that they cant be making much. When we got married, we would constantly hear about how they could only afford X, and they made it very clear that they wouldnt be buying us a lavish celebration totally fine, btw. I would be told how they couldnt afford to go out to eat, they are always letting us know that they dont have the money to do little things like having a lunch out, or other expenses of that nature. Apparently they took out a second mortgage on their home to help pay for the wedding.The problem, however, is that Ive witnessed some pretty egregious spending on their part. Two new cars within the past year Both would be considered high-endluxury Brand new big-screen TV 70-something inches Several vacations, including places like Germany, Costa Rica, Mexico and planning several moreTheir self-pitying attitude doesnt match up with their spending habits AT ALL. I have been worried for a while now that they are going to someday end up at our doorstep, expecting help. The fact of the matter is that we are undergoing the process of organizing our financial situation. We just bought a house, and we are trying to find a new car for my wife, since hers is crapping out on us. Im looking to sell my new-ish car that I bought a couple of years ago in order to come up with some down payment cash for her, so that we dont have to eat into our safety net I still have my old high school beater to drive in the meantime. We are trying to pay off her student loans. We are also talking about trying to have kids in the next year or two. The truth is, that while we are making good money, we wont be in a financial position to be helping anybody anytime soon.Heres where it gets interesting. My father in law just inherited roughly 500K from the passing of one of his parents. My first reaction was to relax, and assume that they will be able to use this money to invest wisely. I was wrong. Their immediate reaction was to begin searching for a vacation home to buy, and to book a couple more exotic trips. Apparently, of the 500K, he designated 1K to give to us at Christmas and by give he meant hold on to for us and just take us on the next vacation.My wife seems to be perfectly fine with letting them live this way. Sure, they have money now, but judging by their spending habits, I cant imagine that it will last long. I dont think she can even imagine a scenario where her parents would someday depend on us for help. Its understandable I guess, to falsely assume that your parents will be self-sustaining forever. Its really not my place to tell them how to spend their money.My question is this: What would you guys do?EDIT: FormattingAssistant: I think if you try to tell them you wont be there for them it will be seen as being selfish and taken as an insult. You will be poisoning the relationship. Your finances will speak for themselves and if you are financially strapped, then thats all you need to say. Were still paying off the house, saving up for the kids college fund, car needs repairs, etc, etc.. As long as your wife is on the same page as you and isnt talking about how much money you have, then it shouldnt be a problem.What I would do is next time youre chatting with the father-in-law tell him that you hear they are looking at buying a vacation house and have a conversation about the vacation house where, what theyre looking for, how often theyll go there, whether its worth owning rather than visiting in a hotelAirBnB, etc... Then when that conversation is done, ask him what their financial plans are once the mother-in-law retires. You may want to preface that topic with something like I dont mean to intrude, but you have two mortgages, how can... or Im curious, why not use that money to pay off the mortgages and invest for mother-in-laws retirement?, youll need to bridge that in your own way.He might deflect the whole conversation with dont worry about that and if so, then change the subject and continue visiting as he might not be prepared to discuss finances, and some people can get incredibly ornery about that.The key thing is that you want to be communicating from a place of concern about their welfare, rather than a place of protecting your wealth.Human: Good advice here, thanks.I would never try to give the impression that I was having the conversation for my own interests.But yes, I can tell you already that Ill get the dont worry about that answer that you mentioned. Gotta keep up those appearances to not be shown up by the retired financial planner down the street.  <response>: You or your wife might want to talk with the mother-in-law then and plant some seeds in her head on how do they plan on living once she retires. Being that she is a counselor, hopefully your mother-in-law has seen what bad planning or lack of planning can lead to. 