<prompt> Human: Im in process of trying not to freak out. He works for his uncle and is paid half of his previous salary 48 down from 90. He works 7:30-2:30p and only recently started driving Lyft because i had a panic attack and threatened to leave him i know thats not the right answer but i dont know how to get through to him. There was a period of time that he was not getting paid at all and didnt tell me. Context on his job - He obviously needs a new job but he wont listen to me and his uncle will never fire him, so here we are... TBH, I think hes scared he wont be able to get a new job, but i also know he just doesnt want to have to go to a normal office and he thinks he can get by because I make good money. He was a teaching professional at a golf course before he started working with his uncle. The two of them are trading futures electronically. They have someone write codes that say this trade has a max win of x and a max loss of x. They havent been able to make a profit in years and he keeps telling me to be patient, but its been three years. To be fair, they were successful at this about 5 years ago, to the point of making over 100k a day edit: the company, which is a well known firm, not him personally, but that was before we were married and he NEVER SAVED ANYTHING! Im going to find a sub-reddit to ask more about the trading any feedback is MUCH appreciated and possible career options. Im so ignorant in this area that Im not sure what our first steps should be? Maybe a consolidated bank loan? Are any of those loan consolidation companies safe to use? Should we cut up his cards and add him as a user to my credit cards? Should bankruptcy be a consideration?Adding insult to injury, we had been looking for a new car because we have a 2010 American made SUV that has been having some problems. Its got about 100k miles and 8k left on the loan, but its only worth 6k monthly payment of 400. He thinks we should leave the car alone for now, but I think we should try to get rid of it to make sure we have a reliable car no surprise with a lower monthly payment. Thoughts?How did I find out? Im in process of starting a new job and were talking about moving to the suburbs of Chicago. We have always had separate accounts and a joint savings. I discovered he had taken a few thousand out of the joint savings without telling me, so we had a come to Jesus conversation where he agreed to sign up for the app HoneyDue, so we could get everything in order. Then this morning he added his credit cards to the app and i was able to add up all the debt for the first time. TL:DR, husband just came clean about 30k CC debt . Aside from reducing spend and cutting up the cards, what are our options for paying down the debt fastest?  <response>: Im in process of trying not to freak out.I recommend making a plan in order to alleviate your anxiety. Take comfort in knowing you have the means to overcome this situation.started driving LyftThis is not a good way to make money.i had a panic attack and threatened to leave him i know thats not the right answer but i dont know how to get through to himMake a solid plan and then ask him to agree to follow it. If that doesnt work, you can go back to panicking and threatening to leave.He obviously needs a new jobHe needs to spend within his means. That means increasing income, reducing expenses, or some combination thereof.he wont listen to meHe wont listen or he wont obey? The best you could do is pass him job postings that he qualifies for. What reason does he give for passing them up?The two of them are trading futures electronically.So they gamble based on a future outcome. Sounds like a risky business.They havent been able to make a profit in yearsThe market has been doing fantastic lately. Do they need it to do poorly to make money?To be fair, they were successful at this about 5 years ago, to the point of making over 100k a dayIf I made 100k at the casino yesterday, that doesnt mean Ill make 100k today.Im so ignorant in this area that Im not sure what our first steps should be?List all debts. Make a joint budget. Determine how much per month you can afford to put towards the debt. Track your expenses. Determine whether you hit your budgets. Adjust as necessary.Maybe a consolidated bank loan?You absolutely should apply for loans from your bank or credit union with lower interest than the CCs. To get the best rate, you may have to secure it with an asset ie HELOC. There are also 0 interest balance transfer credit cards you can get but watch out for balance transfer fees. I recommend Discover IT which has 0 interest and 0 balance transfer fees.Are any of those loan consolidation companies safe to use?Most likely, but read the small print.Should we cut up his cardsYupadd him as a user to my credit cards?Nope, hes cashdebit only until the day that he has 0 CC debt and can set his cards to auto pay their full balance each month.Should bankruptcy be a consideration?Not really, this debt is relatively small compared to your combined income.Its got about 100k miles and 8k left on the loan, but its only worth 6k monthly payment of 400. He thinks we should leave the car alone for now, but I think we should try to get rid of it to make sure we have a reliable car no surprise with a lower monthly payment. Thoughts?I would expect a 2010 American SUV with 100k miles to be fairly reliable, but its hard to say without knowing more details. I recommend setting aside 50-100month to fund vehicle repairsmaintenance regardless of the makemodelyear of your vehicle. These arent surprise , you know for a fact that your car will require more repairs and maintenance the more you drive it. This is in part why driving lyftuber isnt very cost effective.I discovered he had taken a few thousand out of the joint savings without telling me...We have always had separate accounts and a joint savings.In my opinion, income of both spouses should be treated as joint income, used to pay joint expenses, placed into joint savings and then, if any remains, split off into independent allowances for each person. I respect that others can make separate finances work in marriage, but even then you both need ways to stay accountable to each other. we had a come to Jesus conversation where he agreed to sign up for the app HoneyDue, so we could get everything in orderIf hes willing to team up with you and work it out then there is hope. 