<prompt> Human: Hi PF- Im using a throwaway for obvious reasons. My wife and I are in our mid-30s, gainfully employed, parents of 1, and live in the southern US NC. We are finally looking to purchase a home, but it seems we make too much money to qualify for any sort of assistance programs for 1st time home buyers.Combined we make a bit over 100k a year which puts us in the upper middle-class in our state. The problem is we dont have any real savings other than our 401ks, and we dont have the 10k to put down on a pre-approved 200k home loan.With child care costing more than rent, 2 modest car payments and everything else, we basically live paycheck to paycheck. We dont have any significant CC debt or other loans. Lenders weve spoken with dont seem like they care to help us at all. We have a family friend as our realtor but even she seems disinterested in helping us find a house. I seriously feel like were stuck in the middle where we dont make enough to throw a bunch down and we make too much to qualify for any sort of assistance programs. What are we supposed to do?We just want to buy a modest home to raise our child in. Were not looking for something we plan on flipping or selling in 5 years, we want to buy the house we will grow old in.I know, woe is me, but if anyone has any advice I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you.  <response>: If you are upper middle class and living paycheck to paycheck you have a spending issue.Feel free to list your complete monthly budget so we could comment on possible issues.A couple things I am interested in: the cost of childcare, your rent, and what you describe as two modest car paymentsEDIT: I would be wary as a lender as well. Your income says that you should be able to afford a 200k house, but your finances say that you are not able to afford it. 