<prompt> Human: Hey all.x200B;The girlfriend of 7 years was recently told she was to be a bridesmaid in one of her best friends weddings. Its a destination wedding in Jamaica and the friend has already booked it. Some background-Im 26 shes 25; I make maybe 25ka bit a year in my last semester of school and she makes 15 an hour working full time. Debt wise she owes 12k on her car, I owe 13k in student loans. I have 23k in a Roth, 120k at a variable rate mortgage loan difficult to get refinanced fixed after write offs self employed -I drove 30k miles last year on a house market valued at 200k, 65k cashbusiness inventory currently for sale. Needless to say were not exactly rich and have cut a lot of costs in saving up to investpossibly pay for our own weddingsome home repairs and a better car for me in the next year assuming I get a better paying job. x200B;She made some valid points in that it would cost roughly 1500 apiece for a 4 day trip the friend is NOT paying for any accomendations, etc which I thought was standard of destination weddings. We havent taken a vacationtrip to ourselves in 2-3 years and have been saving for one. She mentioned while we could afford it-we should be able to take our own vacation but she feels like her friend will hate her if we turn it down. I know another married couple who was invited and they didnt even go on a honeymoon as theyre saving for a house-I plan on talking to the husband and seeing his opinion.x200B;I guess Im asking for how to navigate this with tact. In my mind its ridiculous to book it without talking to their friends and such but thats how it happened. Has anyone been in this situation?  <response>: Youre under no obligation to spend 1500 to attend a destination wedding. People that have destination weddings should be understanding of people not attending due to cost. 