<prompt> Human: Im about to buy an engagement ring and Im getting really hung up on how much to spend. A coworker told me 3 months salary, but that seems grossly inappropriate, I make good money mid-six figures, my lifestyle however is fairly modest compared to income. At work everyone is making similar salaries so I dont want her to have the smallest ring at work related events, but we dont live in a really affluent area and Im concerned that a big ring would be inviting trouble. She and I have discussed this and we havent been able to come to an agreement. Thoughts?Assistant: Rank the top ten most expensive rings in your social circle. You cant, because you dont care about it. Maybe you remember one making an impression on you, but even thats unlikely. Vanishingly few people care about measuring other peoples rings. Those who do are probably assholes and you should minimize their voices in your life. Ask your intended to marry you, go shopping for a ring together. Get something reasonable that you both like. Human: Thats my thought, I just dont want her to have a ring she isnt proud of if that makes sense  <response>: Recently just went through this process and sounds like our salaries are fairly similar though I have a fair amount of debt from graduate school. I had a crazy hard time shelling at the money for a ring, but for my fiancée, a ring was really important to her. To her it was a symbol of our relationship and was not interested in trading up or getting something different down the line. In the end, I justified it by knowing that it made her happy and that she is otherwise not into material things, so I knew it was coming from a genuine place. In any event, relationships are largely focused on doing things for your significant other that you wouldnt ordinarily do for yourself. So while it may seem excessive to you on a personal level, it does feel great to do something for your significant other that means a lot to them putting aside the larger atrocities that are associated with diamonds, of course.Good luck out there my dude. 