<prompt> Human: Looking for others who have had this problem with their significant others and were able to fix it. Weve been living together for 4 years now. Her parents taught her nothing and nothing I tellteach her seems to get through to her.Its not like shes going out to the mall and blowing a couple hundred or anything, but she makes so many small purchases its killer. Coffee here, fast food there, buy her friends baby something. EVERY DAMN DAY.Ive showed her how quick these little things add up. She wont follow a budget. Were already in debt and wed be bringing in an extra 500-800 if she followed the budget I made, but instead were barely breaking even for the month.The only other idea I can come up with is to make her start her own checking account, separate our incomes and make her pay for half of the bills and teach her that way. The only thing Im worried about then is if shes going to blow her money and not have enough to pay for half of the bills.Any ideas from others that have had this problem and how they fixed it would be great! :Assistant: I have friends who use a cash based system, although this is going to be difficult. Everything is paid for in cash and they do not carry any cards at all. They each get a certain budget of cash each pay check to spend, bills and savings are separated before hand along with upcoming gifts, etc. It can be risky in emergencies not to have another way to pay for things but it might work as an initial wake up tool for your wife. It is pretty clear you cannot spend any money if your wallet is empty. Be careful though, nobody likes having to ask for money because they ran out, doubly so if it is theirs to begin with, or worse thinks that someone else is getting to spend it. My wife has some of the same issues, and her father was a banker, her brother is a financial adviser. I had her watch me pay bills a few times, and that sorta helped as well. Human: I tried that once, kinda. I gave her a credit card with a 250 limit. She maxed it then opened up store credit cards without telling me. I cried and cringed.But I like the last part you said. Even though she locks up when I bring up bills, maybe if I can strap her down to a chair or something as I pay our mortgage, car payments, and utilities, maybe shell learn that money disappears quicker than she thinks.  <response>: She maxed it then opened up store credit cards without telling me. I cried and cringed.So this is a relationship problem, not a pf one. I think you can try and talk to her about it from that angle. The way she spends money and hides it from you is undermining your relationship, and you need it to change. Does she value you enough to work on it? Make it less about the financial stuff which some people fundamentally do not understand and purely about trust and respect in your relationship. If debt freedom and financial stability are important to you, is she willing to modify her actions to reach those goals even if her mindset stays the same? 