<prompt> Human: Im going to preface this by saying myself and my current S.O. have been together 10 years. I purchased a home, on my own, about 5 years ago and we are not married though we absolutely plan to be in the not-so-distant future. Rather than dive into the inner workings of our relationship lets just assume that we are married for the sake of the thread. She has a 4 year degree in Business Management and I work in a trade. I have about 12k saved in cash and about 10k maybe more in liquid assets tools, equipment, motorcycle, etc. I make about 60k a year and she makes 40k. Im going to do my best to include as much information as I can but im ultimately looking for some benchmarks so-to-speak as to what a realistic offer would be to accept as this offer will require us me to sell the house and relocate about 400 miles. As I said above, I work in a fairly specialized trade and have absolutely no problem finding work. She works, currently, as a Project Manager for an engineering firm in the midwest with their focus on Oil and Gas. The promotion is within the same company but will require her to relocate about 400 miles from where we currently live and will from what I understand be assistant manager of business development directly under the VP of the company, but still managing her current clients along with other, new, unspecified duties. I wont focus too much about the emotional aspect of relocating because, for the both of us, its mostly a non-issue. Were currently living in a 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom house which I am currently paying a mortgage on. There is going to be an obvious change in lifestyle while trying to relocate as far as where we are living, at least for a period of time, compared to what we have now so that is obviously a difficult hurdle to overcome considering well probably have to down-size at least short term. So lets look at the numbers: Current mortgage is 65k, house appraised withing the last 6 mons. at 85k. To maximize my profit in a sale situation I would have to drop about 5k into the house renovations, upgrades, etc. which im not prepared to do all at one time, hence, taking a fairly large chunk of my savings if I were to spend that out of my own pocket. On top of renovations and such, I stand to lose I estimate about 5 in the homes value in sales and fees associated with selling that I dont feel I should have to lose on someone the company elses account. Meaning: they want her to move and truly want her in that position bad enough they should be able to come up off of that amount of money. Were not selling for fun or our own will to relocate, this is a position the company pursued her for specifically, were perfectly happy where were at. According to several different online resources the cost of living will be about 12 higher in the area that we are asked to relocate too. I assume that the cost of relocating is going to be somewhere around 5k between moving expenses across several trips, temporary housing, food no kitchen all the time, etc. This might be one area in which im severely over estimating the cost, hence, the post. This all assumes were going to try and keep up our current standard of living to a certain extent still have car payments, insurance, student loans, etc to pay for.Right, so on to the salary her salary not mine. I personally dont feel as though anything less than a 20 salary increase will be near acceptable but she is willing to give up a certain amount of standard of living for an opportunity to move up within the company and further her career which is fair to a certain extent. The 12 increase in cost of living is obviously a big factor in that. Broken down, in my mind, I feel as though 20000 is a reasonable number as far as a straight up-front money goes, not including a salary increase. 5k for the repairs, 5k for moving expense, 4500 for loss on home sale, and a 5k immediate cost of living bonus if you will. The problem is that she feels as though this number is far too high, its Half of her yearly salary theres no way thats a realistic number. I feel as though she is severely underselling herself and willing to accept far less than what the position is worth from a financial aspect. Im also worried that she is willing to accept a salary that would essentially equate to a lateral move, money-wise, while taking on broader responsibility. While this isnt my area of expertise its difficult for me to quantify exactly what her worth is to the company in both positions so maybe some of you can help put that aspect into perspective. Ultimately, as I said before, I feel as though the company should be willing to court her us to a certain extent if they are truly serious about wanting her to be in that position but she is still extremely timid in asking for more due to embarrassment or greed or whatever. I admittedly dont have a firm enough grasp of what a reasonable request would be in a situation like this so I figured id look for a bit of outside insight. Im going to keep thinking about this and I may add things as I think of them and will do my best to answer any questions you may have. All insight is greatly appreciated!  <response>: 20k isnt a lot of money for relocating. However, 20k lump sum is a lot of money to ask for. Generally companies have relocation packages should should cover costs for a visit, temp housing, closing costs, sometimes a small lump sum, and etc. Just ask for it in the negotiations, Im sure theyll give you one of the relocation packages. It would cost the company more to recruit someone else andor hire somebody else than to send your girlfriend. 2nd comment: somebody else said it, but 40K is VERY low for a project manager with 4 years of experience and a bachelors degree in business management. You should be floating in a bracket anywhere from 60K - 100K for that position. Especially in the Oil and Gas industry! How I personally would handle this situation: 1 Ask for a 15 raise along with a relocation package. If they accept, good. 2 If they counter with more than 10 plus relocation, I would take it. You can do homework for next years annual raise to show them comparative salaries for your position and experience in the area. Its hard for companies to say no to hard factual data unless your company is just ripping you off. In which case, leave. 3 If its a no, then say no back. Stay in your job until you find something that pays more if you want. Money isnt everything. 