<prompt> Human: Los Angeles My dad 64M and I 28M havent had the best relationship. He and my mom divorced when I was in elementary school, which I later found out was due to multiple infidelities since before I was even born. Hes never been present in our lives, and my mom has essentially raised me singlehandedly since day one. Hes also been broke and obese his entire life, never having the desire to work, save money or live healthily. Needless to say, Ive always had a pretty disdainful view towards him, and cut off contact many years ago.Today I was contacted by aunt, who has been trying to care for him out of family obligation. She explained his situation: Has had multiple strokes for the last 10 years, the last one physically debilitating him. Homeless - they couldnt find a place that would rent to him because of the state of his health. They left him at a homeless shelter in Los Angeles. He has no moneyassets to his name. Hes 64 and was collecting social security, but his wife whom he married to get her US citizenship in exchange for money 3-4 yrs ago has disappeared but is somehow collecting it on his behalf and hes not receiving his monthly check. Bad mental state - the guy can barely recognize where he is. Needs living assistance because his stroke can come back at any time.They called me today for the first time in years pleading with me for help. Its becoming too much of a burden for them to constantly drive to downtown LA to take care of his every need. And the employees at the facility obviously wont care about his situation. What my aunt has asked of me is: the homeless shelter apparently offers some sort of deluxe living quarter, but for a 200month payment. She has asked me to take over this payment, and to see if Id be willing to take over as his caretaker.My dilemma is: the only sympathy I feel towards this man is as much as I feel towards a complete stranger. I could care less about his well-being, but I do feel bad that my extended family has been bearing this burden for so long. I also have my own family to take care of mom and I, and both of us want nothing to do with him.My question is: is there a solution where I can help him without inconveniencing the life of my own family? Has anyone been in this situation before?Assistant: Dont do it. He had no guilt Im assuming when he left you, and youre under no obligation to shell-out for him.Do not fall for any be a better person speech; if that was how it worked, your aunt should be glad to care for her brother.Human: Haha youre right about that. The man has only ever contacted us for money - no fucks given about our well-being. Didnt even know I graduated college, or started my career. Cant imagine what its like being a father and not wanting to know how far your kid has gone!But at the same time, I feel like the burden is being placed on my extended family that they didnt ask for. And I come from a Chinese background, where abandoning family is really frowned upon, no matter the circumstances.Its a weird spot to be in.  <response>: The Confucian philosophy of filial piety is supposed to be a two way street. Children owe their parents respect and loyalty. Parents are obligated to guide and protect their children.Some guy who donates some sperm and takes off isnt a father. He doesnt get to shirk all his parental responsibilities for decades and then expect you to bow to him.Your aunts and uncles are taking on a burden that is not their responsibility and now theyre trying to foist it on you. If their sense of family duty was so strong why didnt they remind this guy of his obligations when he was busy ignoring his family? 