<prompt> Human: Hi hi. I read this subreddit incessantly, and am aware that this scenario is not entirely unique, but I do need some real, tangible advice. Ive read the sidebars, the conventional-for-here wisdom, but Im wondering if I put some numbers here, if yall kind and wise folks can give some advise more as why rather than what to do.Aight.Locale: SF Bay work in SF, live in East BayGoals: Either own my own lil cottage for perpetually single me e.g. 2 br1 bath; or travel the world before Im not spry anymore. Or both, ideally.Age: Closing in on 40, hunny, and not fabulousGross: 140ishkyear. Which is stupidly middle income here. But this is very recent. Just grew from 100kyear, from 55kyear. Growth potential? I dont see all that much. Maybe a limit of 160-190k in todays dollars because my current company pays middleish, but I dont exactly see myself as a hot property. I dont see myself climbing in my career much further in terms of hierarchy. I would assume no bonus, no retirement match, conservatively.Debt: None. Paid off my student debt a few years ago. Bought a used car in cash dont need it for commuting anymore - and thats another topic: 2014 car, had a major rear-end fix thanks, pothead from Ventura, for 13.7k, probably use it 2k milesyear for weekend trips at this point - should I sell it?. Pay off my cc balance every month.Rent: 1kmonth dont kill me - its a kinda ghettotrashy studio, but not in the ghetto; Im lucky because I had a ridiculous situation that got me hereHow frugal am I? Moderately. Buying myself new underwear is a treat; I try to walk everywhere; but yet I could definitely stand to cook more. Id say I eat out at not cheap but not ungodly expensive places on the weekends, split between a friend and me. Other than that, no hookersblowgambling, or vain expenditures. 30 is too much for a concert, yet 50 for a dinner is normal. Ugh, Bay Area.Savings: This is the dicey part. 200k. Has always been in high interest savings read: 0.1 - 1.4 since the crash. Whhhy? I perceive this as a weird amount to have. Not enough to plunk down on a cottage, because cottages, if for sale at all, are now million dollar homes, and I probably cant afford more than a 400k mortgage. So 600k would be the uppermost for a house I can probably afford. Which is not possible for a standalone house that isnt a plywood box on an 80 degree slope in this area.Retirement: 2 old 401ks I kept as pre-tax, and 1 that I converted to Roth IRA in a low income year. Combined? Probably ... about 200k.Other investing? Also dicey: No. I havent utilized CDs because interest has been so low. I havent done individual investing due to trepidation that it can all crash again, and because I want to pounce when the market is ripe on said cottage. I wasnt in a position to do this from 2008-2010, when prices were low; and now I find prices way too high for the value. So Im in that dumb waiting game of waiting for lower prices, possibly higher interest, with a big down payment. Thats what I tell myself anyway.Retirement investment strategy: Even though Ive got that stupid amount in savings, its not like Im obeying the 1x at 30, 2x at 35 yo rule! At least given my current income. Do people follow that rule when they have a mortgage too?! But this is because of my sudden jump in salary which, btw, I dont put any stock in lasting a long time - I have imposter syndrome and feel like I could be on the street applying for minimum wage jobs any moment. So retirement accounts? Kinda all over the place. I think in sets. So the Roth IRA is in aggressive small and large cap funds. 1 old 401k is all TRFs. And the other old one and current one is just a plain old index fund.Do I really want a house? Yes, yes I do. I want to host little salon chamber music performance art gatherings. I want to get an upright piano and have enough space to dance around. And I want to grow weird plants in the garden. And I cant stand the idea of a HOA or someone oafishly stomping above my head or having repressed 30-second loud sex in my ear.About the travel dreams: I havent had a true vacation in over 15 years. I do want to see the world. I think I travel best alone. Yet I have this self-punishing mentality. I dont literally tell myself, Dont take a vacation, you dont deserve it! But I do weird shit like agonize for 30 minutes in front of the fucking green juice shelf at the market because it costs like 9 a bottle. I want the green juice because I think itd improve my health, but I cant stand how much it costs, so I get a blender and buy cheap non-organic vegetables that I have to compost after they rot, because thats not the point of the cold-pressed movement and I dont like the smoothies I make again, someone just stop the madness of whats happening in the bay area - its seeping in to my pores. You know. Like Ill buy the 99c toothpaste because I dont need those fancy sparkles. And yet Ill go to a restaurant just to socialize and wind up spending a chunk of my weekly income. You know? Oh wait, back to travel dreams. I should probably be taking watercolor classes, paying for a gym and classes because I sho aint exercising effectively on my own, and planning ahead by buying plane tickets and AirBnB or hotel rooms - to make myself take that vacation I should never take, right? Because everyone else is smugly married and burning through cash, and Im staying late at the office to cover theyz azzes, which will get me nowhere.Summary: Treating myself a little would probably be healthy, but as you can see, Im crazy and refuse to do it.What am I really looking for here? I know that I should probably take a chunk of the 200k Im willing to gamble and throw it in to an index fund. So I can pull it right out right when a big earthquake happens and an out-of-towner engineer goes scurrying back, as long as the structure they abandoned is still safe. Pounce, right? What is the best wait until I can pounce option?100k in index funds? Wait a few months until theres a crash because of the China trade war? Earlier is more realistic than psychic? Buy a condo now even at the height of the market? STFU and go on a vacation so I can calm the eff down? Buy myself some new underwear, commit to eating my own shittily cooked food, and keep saving like a crazy war grandma? Keep punishing myself until we go full on post-apocalyptic your-money-doesnt-mean-shit hunger games realness? I know that the real answer is to get some fucking perspective, volunteer my time for those in need, and give some of my money away, because I will never keep up and yet Im not doing anything effective with my savings.And no, therapy hasnt helped.Enjoy the laughs at my cray cray. As long as I get some real advice here.  <response>: Got no advice, but would like to say it was very entertaining to read. 