<prompt> Human: I am getting this off my chest because a I owned up and b I need to hear the truth.Over the course of a 1.5yrs I racked up 20k of CC and loan debt that was largely hidden from my wife. We got a new roof due to damage 7k, I have a personal loan 4k, and a credit card that I hid 7k. I refinanced the roof loan into a smaller interest rate with a credit union, Im making 300 payments on the personal loan, and I just owned up to the cc. We are going to use the bulk of my 15k bonus to pay the cc rather than put in my emergency fund. My income is 115k, expenses fixedvariable come to 5500 includes savings goals-- not inc the cc payments. I took on a second job on the weekends for 10hrs 14.5hr. TLDR: Im a liar, a loser, and I destroyed my marriage. Dont be me. I should have put my 1M life insurance policy to use ages ago.  <response>: Personal advice since Ive been in your wifes position: in a few months or so when things start to get under control, youre going to forget how sorry you feel now and youre probably going to be less strict about your spending. If she tells you that you need to rein in your spending, do it. Because youve put her in a position where now she has to be responsible for both of your spending habits, and thats already difficult enough without having someone bitch that theyre not allowed to buy whatever they want anymore. Not trying to make you feel guilty, but this is hard on her, too. Stick to the budget. Good luck. 