<prompt> Human: The title about says it all. I am 28, started working a year ago after finishing my Ph.D., and gross about 120Kyr a mix of base salary, bonuses, and stock grantsoptions. I have about 125K in savings retirement and taxable and no debt. He is in grad school for English lit, and although his income will hopefully increase from the current 20K, his earning potential is highly unlikely to be as high as mine. He has 20K in student loan debt which I will likely end up paying, but only after marrying, and periodically carries a credit card balance.Now, I was also in grad school for 5 years prior to starting this job, so its not like I have some extravagant lifestyle to cut back. We already do some of the obvious stuff, like splitting rent proportionally, and I pick up all of the bills and most of the groceries. However, the marriage discussion is starting to happen, so I was wondering if anyone else had ideas on making finances work out with two very different incomes. We maintain mostly separate finances right now, but I want to do right by him and me, so would be interested in peoples opinions on this. I feel like a lot of the advice Ive seen on this is geared towards couples with a SAHM, but that is obviously not the situation here.Also, I dont intend this as a relationship advice post - yes, I date a low-earning dude, and Im fine with that.EDIT: Thanks for all the great advice everyone! Wow, youve all given me a ton of great ideas to mull over.DOUBLE EDIT: As this is my first thing Ive posted as a new topic in reddit, I really appreciate the welcome. This is kind of an intimidating place to get into, but this has generally been a really great and supportive discussion.Assistant: I may be in the minority but once marriage happens it is all one income. No more splitting.Human: See, this is what Im curious to learn more about. Ive typically heard this with couples where the wife stays at home, but my boyfriend is very independent on the financial front, so Im concerned this may not fly. Have you tried this out? Run into any complications or pitfalls?  <response>: Its kind of hard to be indipensent of someone you live in the same house with share the same debts and likely file taxes jointly with. He emphasizes his independence likely due to insecurity. You can safely plan to be the breadwinner and your family using mostly your income for spending. Its really the only way that it would work unless you want to build him a shack out back or feel like clipping coupons with him for hours after a grueling day at work because he cant afford to go to dinner with you otherwise. 