<prompt> Human: EDIT: thank you everyone for your advice. You have given me a lot to think about, and some good starting points to discuss next steps with my parents. Im off to bed now, but I will be reaching out to my parents and grandparents tomorrow to start talks with them about my g-parents moving in with my parents, and what that would require of their medical information. I will also be speaking with my brothers this week about taking on more of the student debt ourselves. I will also be doing some research into non-bank employed financial advisers. This is so much debt to handle, and bankruptcy is a serious consideration, so I think paying for an adviser for my parents is the least I can do after all they did for us. If we do chose the bankruptcy route or if another option arises, I want the next steps done right... not digging this hole any deeper. Im going to see if I can get Friday off work so I can spend the day sitting down with my dad and really looking over his financials.. see where the money is going. Im also going to take the advice to talk to my mom about Public Loan Forgiveness, and about looking at less physically demanding nursing positions she could aim for in the next few years. Finally, I am going to see if I can get my parents, but especially my dad, to talk to a therapist. He has seemed so stressed and broken since last night, and I want to make sure that this situation doesnt hurt him mentallyemotionally more then it already has. Thanks again everyone--I really, really appreciate the time and detail everyone took for their comments. Thank you.Hi reddit. Im stressed out and could use some advice. My parents are good people, the best, but they have made some bad financial decisions and have a lot of debt now. My dad is a proud man who loves and finds a great deal of purpose caring for his children and parents, but last night he finally broke down to me 23F crying and admitted that he needed help sorting out his finances. I really want to help him. However, I am still learning about managing finances myself, so Im seeking outside advice here. As a background to how he got so deep in debt--growing up my parents owned a restaurant. However a number of bad years lead them to remortgage the house and go into significant debt to keep it afloat. They ended up closing it a few years ago anyway, though. It was a rough few years for them, but eventually they have managed to land on their feet okay salary wise. Their debt from that, though, is killing them. They also put me and my brothers through college, and my mom through grad school.As of last year, my parents combined adjusted gross income right now is 210k mom makes 60k, dad makes 150k, though he does consulting work with food companies so that varies a lot--last year he made 90k. They only started making around this amount within the last year or two if anyone wonders why they didnt pay things back before now because it took my dad a while to build up his consulting business enough. As for savings... sadly they wiped out their savings in the business, and because they have been focused on paying off their debts they have only been able to rebuild about 60k. They are putting the max into their 401k, but they are also scared because they have nothing for retirement. The business ate everything. Resources breakdown: Net income: 130k roughly, this year. Can vary a lot savings: 60kDebt break down: 90k credit card debt 200k mortgage underwater, so selling not a great option 190k student loan debt 130k currently most federal, 60k more being added from my brotherThey pay about 1900 a month between their taxes and mortgage. They also have medical expenses for themselves and my grandfather that amount up to at least 1000 a month often more, and they help my grandfather and grandmother with rent 800 a month. Other bills phone, utilities, pets, etc add up to 800month. Im not sure how much they spend on things like food. I do know that my dad is putting as much as he can into loans, but he is so scared and stressed out and Ive never seen him cry before.My grandfather is probably going to need to go into a home sometime soon, so there is that fee upcoming as well. Id like to help in a few years, but right now Im just making enough to cover my bills. I know they make enough money right now that they can tackle this debt. Only, I dont know what to tell them to address first. Should they pay of the credit card debt first? They are trying--they are putting all the remained into the debt--but they are scared they may only be able to make this much for the next couple years mom is a nurse and probably cant work much longer as one.Reddit, where do I start helping them build a budget? They are trying to balance the loan repayments with the need to save for retirement. tl:dr; parents had a business that went under--they are almost 500k in debt and though they made good money this year, that is recent and might only be for the next few years. They are also financially helpingcaring for my elderly grandparents. How do I help them plan and budget?Assistant: However a number of bad years lead them to remortgage the house and go into significant debt to keep it afloatPeople need to stop doing this. Seriously - keep retained earnings but never put your home on the line. The fact that the SBA offers primary residence secured notes is totally revolting and it needs to stop.190k student loan debt 130k currently most federal, 60k more being added from my brotherThis isnt putting someone through college, its taking out a mountain of student loan debt to fund a career thats unlikely to last that long.so there is that fee upcoming as wellIf he doesnt have long term insurance, your parents will not be paying for that. Hell qualify for Medicaid and be placed in a state care facility or will move in with your parents.I know they make enough money right now that they can tackle this debtDo you? Because I dont. Theyve got presumably 20 interest rate credit card debt to the tune of 90,000. That consumes over 24,000 a year in their gross income in interest payments alone. mom is a nurse and probably cant work much longer as one.Then why did she go to graduate school?! That decision made their situation so much harder than it needed to be. Heres my no nonsense answer: they need bankruptcy. Were I in their position, Id stop paying everything but the student loans. Id contact the lenders and tell them I was broke and had zero money Id offer to settle the credit cards for 25. Theyll refuse. Id still not pay, but I may send in a 100 payment every now and then. Id pour everything into the student loans. Stop paying into a 401k, its a waste of time. The house is underwater? Id stop paying on that too. The house will go to foreclosure, but it will give them several months of free living. Negotiate for a mortgage modification when theyre delinquent. If any of the accounts go to collections, refuse to speak to them and offer them 25 in full settlement. If it piles up and they get sued, force the lenders to go through the entire lawsuit. Show up at the court hearing and argue against it. If they get a judgment, dont do anything. If they garnish their wages or freeze their accounts, immediately file bankruptcy and claw the money back. Adopt a militant posture with the creditors.They dont have the time to repay 500,000 in debt and retire with dignity. The faster they realize that the debt needs to either be written down or bankrupted out, the better for all parties involved.Human: Yeah, I know their choices werent always the best. They are good at lots of things, just not money. The big issue is that they were so loving, and couldntwouldnt say no to family. My mom actually got her nursing degree right before the restaurant went into trouble it was successful for a number of years, so they didnt think that it would be a problem. She isnt sure if she can work too much longer because nursing requires so much physical effort. Honestly though, the student loans wont be discharged in bankruptcy, so given that declaring would tank their credit I am not sure that that would be best. Foreclosure would also put them out on the street. I cannot take them in, nor can my brothers, so I think that would make things worse. :I was looking at an online repayment calculator and I am thinking they could maybe pay a lot into the credit cards and get them down in less then 5 years, while only paying min on the student loans? I have to get the other numbers out my dad, but if they could pay 3000 a month on the credit card debt I think they can... The student loans were lower actually, but when my parents hit financial trouble the interest capitalized and the total climbed actually more then what it was before. But I think a number of them will be forgiven soon? They would have to pay tax on that, but I think that would be lower then trying to pay off the full amount?I am hopingplanning on helping them out in their old age so are my brothers, and I know they have Social Security coming, so they may sell the house then and move somewhere smaller?Ive been doing so much reading today on all of this and I feel like my head is exploding. Assistant: She isnt sure if she can work too much longer because nursing requires so much physical effort.So she works part time. Work isnt binary, especially work like nursing. Odds are she could moonlight and still bring in meaningful income. the student loans wont be discharged in bankruptcy, so given that declaring would tank their credit I am not sure that that would be bestWhat new debt are they looking to take out? If the answer is none, who cares what impact this has on their credit? Thats doubly true because escaping the credit card debt alone makes that student loan pay off entirely possible. Foreclosure would also put them out on the street. They dont rent homes, condos, or apartments where they live?I am thinking they could maybe pay a lot into the credit cards and get them down in less then 5 years, while only paying min on the student loans? 5 years closer to retiring being unable to work. 5 years of their remaining income. This isnt the time to give the last of their money to credit card companies.But I think a number of them will be forgiven soon?Based on? Theyre not near 25 year retirement or in another forgiveness plan, are they?Human: Yeah you are right... Im feeling so stressed out right now having just learned the full amount I had totally forgotten that part time is real. My mom is pretty healthy, but all her coworkers retire in their mid 60s at the latest... one of my friends suggested that there might be non-physical things she can do with the nursing degree too Im going to help her look at. I sure hope they arent taking on any more debt! But I know credit also affects approval for rental properties... Im wondering if I might be able to convince my grandparents to move in with them, that would free up 800. I know I can convince them to sell the house when they retire...They do have social security coming, and my brothers and I were already planning on helping them when they are older... I wish I had known how bad things had gotten, because I would have insisted on taking on more of the student loans. As it is my older brother has his almost paid off and if my career works I should have mine done by 30 or earlier, so we should be in a better place to help...Basically my parents screwed over their finances making sure that my brothers and I and my grandparents had a better financial life. Assistant: I know I can convince them to sell the house when they retire...If they dont have any money coming in, they cant retire.Human: Of course. Man I hadnt even thought about that. Okay, I really need to see if I can find a financial adviser to talk to.  <response>: I mean, at the least theyll have social security coming in but I think someone else said somewhere retire with dignity.Youre not gonna retire with dignity on social security alone. Its...really not enough to maintain the kind of standard of living that even allows you to rake up 500k in debt. 