<prompt> Human: Im 27f, software engineer, make about 85kyear. He is 25m, sales manager, makes 50kyear. We split the rent and utilities down the middle. However, any time we go out anywhere I pay, whether it is dinner, events, etc. I feel compelled since I make more money. I havent minded until now. As it turns out, Ill end up paying for the wedding and honeymoon as well, totaling about 8k.Im planning on sitting down with him and sharing my budget and asking to see his as well. But I have some debt that I want to pay off, and frankly I dont even want a regular wedding. I wanted to elope, but he wanted to be able to invite his family and his mom threw a fit, so now were having a traditional wedding. I know that when we get married everything will be shared anyways, but I want to be selfish. I would rather spend that money on paying off a car or saving for a house. And he doesnt make that much less than I do, so should I keep paying for everything?I suppose this would be appropriate for rrelationships as well, but I wanted to get the finance side of it as well.Update: Thank you SO much for all of the feedback! Initially when we had moved in together, he insisted on paying 50 of the bills I guess its a pride thing, but after talking everything over, we are splitting it based on our incomes, which leaves him with more room to save. We talked about the different suggestions here and will make a decision based on what is best for us. Simply having the conversation though helped clear everything up. So thanks again!  <response>: 15 years married here, and I dont think there is a silver bullet way to work your finances together but I think its incredibly important that you talk about it ASAP and get on the same page, whatever that is. Most importantly, you need to have shared goals for what you want your life to be like together and where your trying to get. Do you want to buy a house? Do you want to have kids, do you want to vacation together? What are the realistic, long-term career trajectories for both of you? How risk tolerant are you? What do dream about having the money to do? What can you give up for that? Once you have a shared understanding of those big dreams then you need to start making a budget ASAP that is directly tied to those goals. It doesnt matter one whit if you combine everything, split proportionally, split evenly etc if you dont have a shared vision for what you want to get out of life. Unlike some of the other comments, Im missing some big evidence of rash spending on the part of your finance. Marriage is a major milestone and many, many people dream of a big celebration. Sounds like youre not on the same page here and thats ok. Welcome to the first major compromise for both of you.Last thing, just dont forget that salary is not the only financial benefit that you each bring to a marriage. Look at your health insurance, life insurance, retirement benefits, bonuses etc and think about all of those things as contributing to the entire financial picture of your household. Good luck. 