<prompt> Human: Hi all,Any advice would be very much appreciated. Im a single full-time father 38M of 3 daughters 8,12,14 set to start a new job in Silicon Valley mid-June. The last 10 years of my life have been a financial disaster, primarily due to severe inexperienceacquiescence on my part, and also massive irresponsibility on the part of my ex-wife. The job I am leaving paid 60kyear, and I also had a second job that paid 500-800month. My new job pays 115kyear which is awesome for me, but living costs in Silicon Valley are insane. Im trying my best to get my life in order for the sake of my kids, and begin to approach some semblance of stability. I would really appreciate it if any of you guys could advise me on how to proceed. Before I give a little more detail, I would just like to get this out of the way: Yes, I know Im screwed trying to make it in Silicon Valley on only 115kyear, but believe I am slightly less screwed than I previously was. So anyway, here are how things stand:- Salary 115kyear- Estimated rent 3,000month- Car payments 830month 400 for mine, 430 for ex-wife as condition of divorce for the next 3 years- Credit piss poor, but improving rapidly after hiring credit repair company mostly ex-wifes medical bills, 3 late payments on her car over a year ago no lines of credit- I dont pay alimony and I guess my ex-wife should pay me child support, but she cant hold a job for more than a couple of weeks without getting fired. The money she does earn goes on clothes rather than her expenses, and shes frequently badgering me for money along with her new redneck fiance. Being in another state will reduce that cost on me since I tend to give in.What bothers me is the rent... I mean it REALLY bothers me... A LOT. I want to start building for our future. It hurts to know that Im not building any equity by renting. I would love to put that money towards a mortgage but the housing cost over there is ridiculous. I have around 30k in my retirement, and would be able to use about 20k of that as a down payment on an FHA loan. Im not sure if that would be a great idea, but it would be very challenging to save up any significant amount of money for a down payment while paying 3kmonth rent. Any ideas? other than youre screwed  <response>: live in sunnyvale or milpitas. make your younger girls share a room. lately in this area, rent is cheaper than mortgage, sometimes by a lot, depending on the town. i get it about building equity, but you will have a very hard time finding a nice home that is qualified for fha. if tech takes a big hit, you dont want a huge anchor around your neck keeping you here while your reserves are low. disclaimer: we own, but our financial situation is different from yours. 