I'm sure you've been asked this a lot too. But any advice you have would be awesome.
there are layers and layers to this issue. without telling my entire life story (again) i don't think there is any quick way to say it. i want to explain my entire experience with this, because your situation sounds so similar to mine, but i probably won't be able to stop myself from explaining every little detail. and i know i've done it several times before on the questions page, and i think most of the important points are covered in the reality section also. but there is a whole jungle of promising solutions, and additional setbacks, and more solutions, and this is an ongoing windstorm that i am still dealing with today. there are a lot of strategies for this. seriously. if you want to know more i can explain