 But on the other hand, I've been dabbling with music for years now (I have over 500 unique projects on my laptop) and still don't have much to show for it. That sounds like a red flag signifying that there is no hope to me. I fear that my keyboard would end up a grand waste of money and space, since I lack the talent needed to operate it.
that reminds me of a swimmer who has decided how good/bad they are at swimming before actually touching any water