For someone who isn't too keen on music theory (you said people should use their "ears and spirits" instead).... you sure do seem to know a lot about it. Are you saying your "technical" knowledge of music theory hasn't helped you?
it is extremely helpful in communicating between musicians. like if i say it's a 1, 1, 4, 5 chord sequence, each chord gets 2 beats, tempo is about 110bpm, and it's in the key of A. now the other player knows exactly what i mean. musical literacy is great for communicating (just like language literacy!). but if you try to use it to make the music sound better, (instead of using your ears and spirit) i think you will constantly run into trouble. all the best things about music will always try to evade any theoretical analysis, like a game of cat and mouse. and i'm glad it is that way