So I like playing by ear and I like reading music, and have been getting better at both of those, and I want to get better at arranging and composing too, but whenever I try I end up wanting to do anything else. I want to be able to do it all on my own, but it seems like I'm not getting anywhere, I've tried pencil and paper, as well as musescore, but neither helped, nor does starting simple. Any advise?  Do I have to get locked in a room with nothing to do but arrange music?
creating your own brand new music might be a more insane and fruitfully bizarre and unlimitedly powerful task than you may have expected. it's really really powerful stuff, it's kind of like staring directly into the big bang. at least that's the way it feels for me. it can be diffucult to swallow, at first. and treating it like anything 'normal' seems to fall flat most of the time. try to experiment a little more loosely for a while, and have fun completely disobeying the assignment. like at least for the first few tries try instead of writing a song try writing a boomerang. or something. songwriting is really really crazy and there is a ridiculous amount of power you can have, and responsibility, ..... i mean like freedom. i mean like, you are litterally making the whole thing up. so don't underestimate how insane of a task that is. and just put on your overalls and jump in. it's weird but it's the most fulfilling ride of a lifetime