i found a secret trick yesterday where i play my guess for what the chord is on my keyboard, then listen to the chord in the song, then play my guess again. i could hear if my bottom note was too high or too low. (only tried this with 2-note "chords", though.) do you know any other secret tricks?
play/pause, really quick, and just hunt for all the notes. this is how you can get started. and transcribe entire songs this way. then after 30 or 40 or 100 songs you will start to intuitively feel how the chords work and pretty soon you won't have search for individual notes anymore, you can just hear the chord. then after 600 or 1000 songs you will automatically know all the songs you've ever heard, just from memory, without even checking them