okay, so, this is long but hear me out. i live in super-serious college land with super-serious computer science people and i'm stuck here until summer, and then for the next 2 years (i'm already too deep to quit now). over the last three years or so i have been too afraid of being free. i live in this bubble where i pretend to be someone i'm not, even to the point where i'll just randomly want to burst out singing in public because i know it would cheer everyone up. i'm really a music and fitness guy who didn't have the balls to just try being a freelance musician, so i just relied on college. But now, i've realized college doesn't help me learn anything and also college sucks and i hate it.So basically, i'm a 5-year-old trapped in a young adult's body. i know that once i start being myself and fully commit to it, there will be no turning back to the old way of thinking, and i'm honestly completely okay with that, except i'm naturally a more "out-there" person than most people and many people i know, (including professors) can and have seen my assertiveness and certainty as disrespect or rudeness. I've requested a solo room so i can be a weirdo and make content in there without anyone judging me, so that's at least a start i guess. Point is, i'm going to change eventually, but the question is just time. My gut is telling me to break out of this mentality now, the sooner the better. I guess the question is, in your experience, is it beneficial to your insecurity around other people to start being yourself fully around them,
yes