but how can i do that for "life"? how do you even decide what the goal should be?
just start talking about it, and you'll start to sort it out. you said "what should the goal be" ... well, next maybe you'd think to yourself... "what is a goal actually?" "should i have a 'goal'"? "do i want to have a 'goal'"? depending on the answers to those, that will lead you to the next questions. basically you're just trying to get it down to one question at a time. if there's too many compounded questions at the exact same time, you actually can't perceive them, so it's just a foggy feeling. so you have to start sorting the mess of compound questions into something you can answer first. and the first several questions will usually just be about trying to figure out which questions you want to be asking