Alright, maybe I'm just stupid, or maybe I'm anxious and depressed and hypervigilant, but your recent song set off a few red flags, per se.  This is less of a question and more just a kinda I dunno, really.  Asking "are you OK" and expecting a genuine like "oh yeah that's a cry for help i'm suicidal" is... not gonna work, and that's patronizing as you're probably in your late twenties to early thirties; you're a big boy who can answer big boy questions and do big boy things by himself.  But I guess just... if you're struggling, please look into seeing a therapist or a psychiatrist.  I love your content and I think you're a pretty damn swell guy.  I would hate to think that you're not doing well and maybe did "a bad thing" if that "bad thing" is what I think it is.
it was actually a good thing. that 'bad thing' hook was sitting around in the list collecting dust and i thought i was never gonna pick it, but due to time constraints i picked it and thanks to a little boldness i proved to myself even more strongly that even the smallest and seemingly weakest song fragments can be written to completion just fine