granma lucymae would say it was godswill that granma bettylou was suffering like that , and that it wasnt for us go against the doctors orders , but i couldnt no way see through to what the two had to do with each other , though maybe if i paid more attention to granma lucymaes bible verses , that would have been more clearer to me , and i would have done the right thing instead of the bad thing that i did .