and so i go in and i sit next to him , not saying a word , and we both sit there , staring at the blank screen , that big old black screen , not saying a word , like we was watching children in paradise ( which is an old french movie about famous clown-fella that loves a girl but he cant never be with her ) or im a cord ( thats the eyetalian movie with the peacock in the fountain ) , and after a while i lean into him like we always used to , and we just sit there for the longest time , not talking , or breathing hardly ( though we mustve , obviously ) but doing nothing but just staring at that big ol screen like it was a black hol or something , just sucking us into it and all our thoughts and dreams and feelings , and then almost at the same time we looked at each other , and , well , we both knowed right there and then what we wanted and what we were going to do , and we dint care what the truth or consequences might be .